The Yak - Did Tyler O'Day Get Fired By The Empire State Building?! | The Yak 8-11-21
Episode Date: August 12, 2021Full ass crew today lets gooooooYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstooly...ak
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. The Yak is back. All the boys are back. Almost. Almost.
Almost.
Rone is here.
He's on a bike.
He's going to be here.
What did he say?
He said, I'm on a bike, and I'm going to be a little bit late.
Okay.
Yesterday he was late, too, but he was only a minute late.
Wow.
Sass said our Uber driver is.
Yeah.
We'll have him read the text.
Yeah.
Foreign.
So this interface isn't distracting.
Yeah, what if people don't really like it?
Is that true?
It seems to be.
What, they don't like ads being shoved down their face?
Maybe they're just projecting because their dicks are soft.
It's the biggest cell phone of all time. This is annoying as shit.
You can't see my whole right shoulder.
How is your right shoulder doing?
It's good.
It's where my rotator cuff sophomore year of college.
I knew that.
In a wrestling match.
Good to have you guys back.
All right, thanks.
Missed you guys.
Missed you guys.
Say it back to me because it wasn't here yesterday.
I missed you guys.
It's good to have you back.
Thank you.
It's good to have us both.
All of us back.
What the fuck's up?
Well, I was thinking, because we're all back together,
maybe I can wait until Rowan gets here to make the announcement.
I'll wait until Rowan gets here to make the announcement.
This seems like a special announcement.
Sass, what did you text the group?
Oh, new phone.
Look at you.
What did you text the group saying that you're going to be late
because your Uber driver was what?
I've got to see this.
Yeah.
What did that say?
You said my Uber driver is.
Take your time.
You take your time.
Okay.
I mean, I believe you because they don't check for that.
Yeah.
There's no standardized testing to become an Uber driver.
There's no IQ test to become
an Uber driver. When they do like
when it says like your Uber
driver doesn't speak English.
Did they have that option when you picked
that Uber? No. So what was your Uber
driver? I don't remember.
It was a long line. Oh well you texted
it. You texted it. You texted it. You can look at it and read it.
Here you know what I'll thumbs up it. You texted it. You texted it. You can look at it and read it. Here, you know what?
I'll thumbs up it.
Did you guys see the celebrity in the office today?
Who?
Let's just say that there's going to be two more hard nipples on Answer the Internet.
She's back, baby.
Uh-huh.
Who?
Abella's back.
Oh.
Uh-huh.
You going to try to take her down?
Danger, danger.
High voltage.
When we talk.
She was here yesterday, too.
Was she? Was she? Oh, jeez. It's another day at the stool. We get used to that. high voltage when we talk she was here yesterday was she
was she
jeez
it's another day at the stool
we get used to that
we get desensitized
to our favorite celebrities
Sean Evans was here yesterday
it's a cool contest
he was
shorter than ever
what was he doing
KFC radio I think
the Failing Upwards guys
here today
who's that
forget it
you wouldn't know.
Know your history, dude.
Come on.
See, I wish I went with an extra large.
No one asked.
You look good.
Yeah, but I wish you went with an XL.
I mean, you're just tight.
Feels tight around the shoulders.
You're probably just going to throw that in a corner after this show and never wear it again.
That's not true.
This is a nice sweatshirt.
It is nice.
I can't believe you're wearing a Barstool sports sweatshirt.
I mean, of course, I'm going to remove this stuff.
Black that out.
Yeah.
All right, so how was the trip?
How was Michigan?
The trip was good.
It was actually good.
I think it's going to be our best video.
Really?
Yeah, it was action-packed.
We got a lot of weirdos.
We got White Sox Dave.
We had White Sox Dave for half the trip.
He's the best.
What was he wearing in that one picture?
So we forgot to get him a costume.
We explained it in the video, but we forgot to get him a costume.
So we just grabbed stuff from Goodwill and he just didn't question it.
He's like, OK, just wore that.
You look cool.
But he's he's a loose cannon.
Good.
After the trip, he was there with you.
Yes.
Yes.
Yes.
He is just as horny off camera, off recordings.
Maybe hornier. I like that, though. You always need the one horny guy who's around who's like because me kyle and donnie aren't just not horny enough
we we said like we went the whole five six episodes traveling staying a big city small
cities resort towns no pussy gun none of us got any. Not even that.
Barstool vs. America guys left a trail of pussy in their
wake. Lenny got a pussy injury.
Yeah, yes. And like we
us, we three
traveled college campuses. This,
there, that, bars.
Not a once. Didn't encounter one pussy.
Not a once.
Not a once.
I almost got laid on the flight back.
You did.
But other than that, it was really heavy turbulence.
I could have any chance I wanted, but I just chose not to.
In solidarity with KB.
Thank you.
There he comes.
Oh, here he is. Here he comes. Oh, here he is.
Here he is.
Rone is here.
Yo.
Good to see you, bro.
It's married Rone.
Beautiful.
Oh, nice.
We got a...
We shook yesterday.
Is it just me or did married Rone fall off?
I know.
You know he got divorced?
He lost his fastball.
Yeah, I heard.
And got back together?
Yeah.
Coors Light is sponsoring us tomorrow night.
Well, right now it's about Roman, baby.
Yeah.
I just got that email.
So now that Ron's here, the whole crew is finally back for the first time in a very long time.
How long has it been?
A long time.
Yeah.
So my announcement was, I think we, all of us here, we should do a two-hour show today.
Yes. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. two-hour show today. Yes.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right.
We would.
Yeah.
Hank, you're going to have to deal with Hank for me.
Two-hour show.
I have to do voiceover for all things.
No, no.
We'll do a two-hour show.
Yeah, fuck Hank.
If you have to come and go, you can,
but two-hour show.
In this studio.
Do not fucking...
Can I just do the...
What?
What's wrong, Brandon?
You're going to make people mad at me.
Why?
Oh.
You know what?
I'm in for a two-hour show.
I'll drop everything else because this is my priority.
Oh, you know.
You know.
No.
No.
Don't grandstand like this.
You think the people want to...
Upvote this video if you want a two-hour show.
What do the comments say?
The whole crew finally here.
Let's do a two-hour show.
All of us together.
We're going to be on the road tomorrow together.
Is anyone... Is anyone object? No. Brandon's do a two-hour show all of us together. We're going to be on the road tomorrow together. Is anyone object?
Brandon's like,
Brandon's half in and half out on a live show.
Speak your mind, Slick. I object.
There are three WWE people
here today that I am interviewing in the
studio at 2 o'clock. What?
But you know we were... The podcast
rooms are booked. Wait, wait. You just
booked that after we said we were going to do a two-hour show?
No, I booked it this morning and I told you about it and now you have to grandstand like I didn't tell you. Okay, you can leave that after we said we were going to do a two-hour show? No, I booked it this morning, and I told you about it, and now you have to grandstand.
Okay, you can leave at 155.
In here.
You can do it in here while we finish the app.
I'm using this.
That won't be...
10X.
10X.
Two-hour, we ride.
20X.
All right, Brandon, how about we negotiate?
I need the studio.
All the podcast studios are gone.
They were thrown on me at last minute, and I'm interviewing them in here.
Who's here?
Who's here?
They were thrown on you?
Xavier Woods from the New Day.
Woods can sit on my lap.
Almost.
Almost?
Whose lap's he going to sit on?
Ever James?
Almost is a person.
He's 7'3".
He can lay on the floor.
And Liv Morgan.
Almost what?
Liv Morgan?
Yeah.
She can sit on Nick's face.
Almost fucking. She'll sit on Nick's face almost fucking she'll sit on Nick's face
how about this Brandon
why don't you get
any of the stars in here
you use a Roman swipe
and you start beating your dick
and when you come
we'll end the show
cause we'll be here all day
Brandon came up to me
and said this
and I was
I just looked at him
he was like hey
can we end the show
at 155 today
cause I have to use the radio studio now people are gonna get mad at me and I just looked at him. He's like, hey, can we end the show at 155 today? Because I have to use the radio studio.
Now people are going to get mad at me.
And I just looked at him.
I was like, why would you tell me that?
We end the show at 155 every day.
Every single day.
Now I'm going to have to fuck with you.
Yeah, I understand.
You said one of those guys is like 7'3"?
7'3", yeah.
Oh, wow.
It's going to take him a while to get in here.
No, well, he's already here.
They're in the game time room.
What a burden that must be, being that disgustingly tall. Oh, is that why there's a crowd in the game time room. What a burden that must be being that disgustingly tall.
Oh, is that why there's like
a crowd around the game time room?
Imagine going to concerts.
Yeah.
Yeah.
All right, we'll do a fucking
55-minute show.
Let the people down.
So what is that,
like four words for each of us?
Just about.
Let's just take a...
Actually...
I think we can just have
a standard show.
Yeah, we would have had
a standard show. You put that in front of me.
That's like when Dave sends an email, remember before the Arizona Bowl,
and he sent an email saying, if you know about the big announcement,
do not tell anyone.
Right.
And then like half the company texted me being like, what's the big announcement?
Like he basically dropped.
You did that.
You did that to me right now.
It's true.
All right, it's fine.
It's fine.
I apologize. I shouldn't have said anything to you. We got all the boys back. It's true. All right, it's fine. It's fine. I apologize.
I shouldn't have said anything to you.
We got all the boys back.
It's nice.
We're on the road tomorrow night.
It's been great to have two hours.
I will be there tomorrow.
I don't know if I love you saying we're on the road.
Yeah, stop saying on the road.
What are you talking about?
We're in the same city.
My God.
We're all getting in a van.
It's beautiful.
Are you even going to show up?
I will be there.
He said yesterday he wasn't going.
You're going to be in Stanford?
I'm going to be late.
What are we doing about Donnie? Is he swimming? I will be there. He said yesterday he wasn't going. You're going to be in Stanford? What are we doing about Donnie?
Is he swimming?
I don't know.
Donnie wants to swim.
We keep saying that, but we need to actually...
So we kind of do.
There's a guy who specializes in maritime law, but he says it's about $2,500.
So we could either do it that legal way or do it illegally.
We should do it the illegal way.
Yeah, right.
Because none of us will get in trouble.
Only Donnie will.
Except for none of us are logistics people.
We all want to get the thing done.
Wait, you pay $2,500 to
swim across the East River?
To have a boat follow you and stop
boats.
And yeah, you'll pay.
That's the equivalent of me buying a Reese's
Fast Break. You buying that.
Is that true?
Is that a check out?
I would consider doing that if Stephen Che also treaded water in the East River.
We could dock two birds out easily, Stephen.
The entire time that Donnie swims?
He's got to just try to get to 15 minutes.
Where would Stephen
J do it just at the beginning or the end what this sounds like to me is this is a
separate event we should make it a separate event I don't it doesn't have
to be an event we don't film it Donnie sit later that's also true and we could
also do the most entertaining video also true we really cut it up yeah why
doesn't Donnie just fucking not tell any of us and just do it?
Because he had on his own.
The death?
Maybe the death?
Yeah, death is a thing.
All right, so we've got to figure that.
That will be a separate event.
Steven, will you tread water in the East River?
I will, but I'll need to raise money for that thing I talked about with you privately.
Why does that require you doing that?
Why don't you just raise money?
What was it? The diamond mines? Yes. You wanted to invest? Why don't you just raise money? What was it?
The diamond mines?
Yes.
You wanted to invest?
Yes.
Invest in a diamond mine?
Mm-hmm.
That had child labor?
Probably not, but maybe.
A little blood never hurt nobody.
What did you want to raise money for?
Tom Brady's workout.
No, I really don't know.
Did you tell me something?
Because they were cutting it. A long time ago, yeah.
A long time ago.
Don't worry about it.
But yeah, if we can raise money
for this thing, of course,
yeah, I'll do it.
Oh, this is to re-elect Trump.
Why has the entire left side
of the studio
taken their headphones off
on some of these days?
Mine just don't work.
They don't work.
Only one of mine works.
Yeah.
Mine don't work.
Mine work perfectly.
Well, that's nice.
That's shocking
that our tech is failing.
I know.
What did you say about SAS, Stephen?
The streams are always reliable, and this is good.
We should have more responsibility airing games.
Pretend I'm saying the SAS numbies.
Oh, shit.
Okay, that's good to know.
He just gave his son-of-boy-dad numbers.
Did he?
No.
No, I missed it.
That's fucked.
Hello.
Steven, I can't hear you, but... He's not saying anything.
Chaps yesterday told me that he had, for his training,
he had to tread water for 90 minutes with like a 50-pound vest on.
Yeah, I'm good.
And Steven can't tread water for 15 minutes.
He was a Marine.
Steven, you're a mini-golf champion.
And a hell of an athlete.
Hard to argue.
Do we sell out that 50-seater yet?
Or are we still struggling?
I know.
There are a couple of seats available.
So actually we should tweet that.
They're actually free tickets, so you can't sell out. We can just out. We haven't even tweet that. They're actually free tickets so you can't sell out.
We can just out.
We haven't even done that.
What are the outside people going to do?
We didn't allocate
all of our tickets.
That's one way to put it.
Yes.
I think we should just release the tickets
like a normal thing.
They are but people need to pick them up because we need to assure them
that they will be there. But I feel like this is such a normal thing. They are, but people need to pick them up because we need to assure them. We need to assure that they will be there.
But I feel like this is such a weird thing.
Has anyone else ever had this problem?
Have we talked about what the event is?
It's like the Ski Ball Championships, like the national.
We've done a pretty bad job of it.
Horrible job.
We shouldn't have any problem selling 70 tickets.
I mean, we'll be doing the show tomorrow,
and they'll be like, hey, can you guys be quiet?
I thought the 70 tickets were gone.
No.
So are we commentating the event,
or this is a separate thing?
This is a clusterfuck.
Why don't we just release, like, just be like...
No, I want to talk about the fact
that we're doing the world championship for skee-ball.
It's Joey the Cat versus the skee-ball kid.
The tickets should sell themselves.
How did this start?
We were talking about pro skee-ball players.
KB brought it up.
He said, I wonder who the best skee-ball player in the world is.
We researched it.
We made them yak celebrities.
I'm excited for this.
Are we going to announce the event?
Yes, yeah, we should.
At 8 o'clock, we will start with a live yak from 8 to 9.
At 9 o'clock is the matchup with the cat versus the skeetball kid.
They will come in and kind of talk with us for a little bit,
but they have separate match coverage.
We will kind of cover the match a little bit loosely from afar.
Wait, so we're staying live during the match?
I believe so, yes.
So we are.
We're covering the match.
So people are going to be able to watch the Yak
and then watch the Ski Ball Championship.
Yes.
That should be how it works, yes.
Why don't you just say yes or no?
I'm finalizing the details, but yes.
That is my current understanding.
Is anyone else getting nervous every time I ask Steven a question?
He's like, in theory, yes.
That should be.
I don't know why we don't.
If everything goes well, yeah.
There's something before the yes every time.
Jay, do you think we're going to have all the tickets?
They're almost gone.
Don't worry about the tickets. Do you think we're going to have all the tickets? They're almost gone. Don't worry about the tickets.
Not very many.
Do you think we're going to show up thinking they can just walk in?
Because yesterday it sounded like we hadn't even sold half of them.
We got to sell our money, first of all.
I know.
What other word do you want me to use?
They're giving them away.
We hadn't even given away half of them.
Allocating.
Distributing.
Do you understand there's going to be people who just show up and be like,
oh, I can clearly get in.
Well, there's a lot of people DMing us.
That's what I want to come.
I want to come.
I want to come.
That's why I don't want to text them online.
Nah, you're reading my DMs from chicks.
We have several people flying in to attend.
They're searching for anyone.
I had people DMing and they were like, oh, I can't make it out to Brooklyn before Thursday.
Okay, then just try to come and see if you can get lucky.
Yeah.
I guess that works.
But you probably won't.
You can't be too upset if you can't get in and you've driven like 10 minutes.
Right.
But like people flying across the country.
What's the name of the bar?
Williamsburg.
Yeah.
That's the area that it's in.
The name of the bar is Butchies.
Butchies.
Full circle.
Butchies.
What?
Butchies is the name of the bar.
Full circle.
There were like 15 tickets left as of this morning.
There probably won't be very many left once they open today.
It's sold out.
It's sold out.
It's sold out.
Yeah.
Yeah.
If there's 15 tickets left, it's sold out.
So we didn't fall off.
No.
I was worried.
Just me.
I was worried sick.
Yeah.
Just me.
I'm more concerned about the live event part
of us doing the skee-ball
which sounds like we can't.
But maybe we can.
Are we going to be able to play skee-ball?
No.
There's a restaurant called Pie's and Thighs.
If everything works out, maybe.
I have a feeling we will be able to play skee-ball.
See?
Theoretically.
We're at an arcade. Just say yes. I have a feeling we will be able to play skee-ball. See? Yes or no. He doesn't say yes or no. We're at an arcade.
Just say yes.
I have a feeling we will be able to play skee-ball.
It's an arcade bar.
You're very evasive today, Stephen.
Can you just say that it's an arcade bar?
Break your neck, KB.
Can you say that tomorrow is Thursday?
Tomorrow is Thursday.
Tomorrow is the event.
Y'all motherfuckers got to relax.
Wait, what did I miss?
What did KB do? KB damn near broke it. He got caught in 4K got to relax. Wait, what did I miss? What did KB do?
KB damn near broke it.
He got caught in 4K breaking his neck.
Did you peep an ass?
Is that a...
He's jealous.
He's locked down for life.
My boy was looking like the exorcist over there.
Eternal love doesn't sound all that good, huh?
I can't twist up like KB and look at whatever I please.
I'm watching you watch.
I'm living vicariously.
You're breaking your neck.
Looking like Christopher Reeve over there.
Yeah, I dare you to contort your shit.
Fucking whipping that thing back and forth.
I'll tell Miss.
Don't do me like that.
I wouldn't.
Don't do me like that.
Let me get on my creep game.
So how long is the...
I got a twist up for the two of us.
How long is the
skee-ball game?
I think they're playing a
something like two out of three. Is it bad blood?
Oh yeah, this is a rematch.
Who won the first one?
The skee-ball kid won.
Am I making that up?
The skee-ball kid is the reigning champion. But Joey the Cat dresses cool. I thought they won in one. Am I making that up? The Ski Ball Kid is the reigning champion.
But Joey the Cat dresses cool.
What do they play to?
Is it standard rules where they get ten balls?
How do they play?
You're asking us?
We don't even know what the event is tomorrow.
You're asking us the rules of Ski Ball?
I'm excited for this.
I'm very excited.
Everyone's got to tune in at 8 o'clock tomorrow night.
We're not having a day show unless we want to.
I won't be here.
Yeah, I don't think we can. Alright, we're going to do an
8 o'clock special edition of the
act tomorrow night.
Can Sass get off? He had some bits
that he was working on. He said it was like about
45 minutes of the show. Can we allocate
the first 45 of the hour?
You should do stand-up.
Well, it's like stand-up, but he'll be sitting, but it's the
same general shit.
Yeah, I'm not going to do that. You don Yeah, well, it's like stand-up, but he'll be sitting, but it's the same general ship. It's the same idea.
Yeah, I'm not going to do that.
You don't want to do it anymore?
Anymore?
We don't have to.
Why?
Why are we doing that, Owen?
This.
Crossing swords.
I can't move my mic around as freely as I like.
Boys, how was Michigan?
Regaleus.
It was great.
Detroit is the worst major city in the U.S.
Really?
I thought it was underrated.
No, unless you count Orlando as a major city.
Okay, Orlando is.
But then Detroit, very close second.
I thought there was an undercurrent of people saying Detroit is actually underrated.
Their whole selling point from a marketing standpoint is, oh, we're not as bad as we used to be.
Yeah.
That's Cleveland as well.
So what is it?
Like warehouses?
I can bounce around Cleveland.
What's the best parts of it that they're trying to sell to the youth?
Is it like thick pizza?
The event was awesome.
It was a lot of fun.
The roller hockey event was cool.
The birthday boys over there
Outside of that
Oh you're buying a barbecue huh
Youngstown Bob and Glenny Balls
Birthday boys
So you guys don't like Detroit
No
Did you go to the hockey thing
Yeah that was fun
That was cool
That was like a really good time
Yeah that was really cool
Yeah it looked really good
Yeah for sure
Michigan is what
Michigan
Northern Michigan
Big fan You like northern Michigan Yeah Sunset's real late Yeah, for sure. Michigan, though? Northern Michigan, big fan.
You like Northern Michigan?
Yeah.
Sunsets real late.
You guys swim in the lake?
Yep.
Yes.
And we went to this bar with a jacuzzi, and KB was nestled between three 40-somethings.
You said he didn't touch a pussy.
He didn't touch a pussy.
No.
Under the water?
Underwater doesn't count.
Underwater does not count. Because you're touching the water, not the pussy. He didn't touch a pussy. Under the water? Underwater doesn't count. Underwater does not count. Because you're touching
the water, not the pussy. Yeah, because KB was trying to show
me how pruned his fingers were from pussy.
I was like, dude, you were in a hot tub.
He was like, no, I swear, this is
pussy prune. Everyone knows there's two different types
of prunes.
He was trying to show me the pattern.
No, pussy pickles. Pussy doesn't prune.
It pickles, not prune. It'll pickle it.
It'll preserve it.
Pussies are preserving it.
Yeah, that was Virginia.
This is a prune from a mucus, not a water.
Mucus membrane.
The next Jurassic Park is just going to be some pruned fingers.
They were trapped in the amber of some pussy.
Yeah, I did read that leak.
What was it?
Future Jurassic Park.
When they rediscover human beings,
it's just two fingers that were crystallized
in the amber of some pussy.
That's right.
They recreate me, probably.
KB in northern Michigan.
You love to finger bang.
Yeah, you do.
You like it more than sex.
Okay.
I feel like that's culturally normal.
For my culture.
Really appropriate.
So, did you guys play any Kid Rock?
Yeah, we were dressed as Kid Rock.
We played, like, acted as.
Nice.
We played the role of Kid Rock.
Did you play any Kid Rock?
Did you have Wyso Sox Davis Kid Rock?
No, he was somebody else. He was another figure.
Oh, his Michigan star.
His little friend.
Josie? I thought it was Josie.
No, we chose another Michigan icon.
Eminem?
Gerald Ford? Slim? Slim was there?
Someone who resembles
White Sox.
Yael Cabrera?
Resembles a famous documentarian.
Michael Moore.
Yes.
Michael Moore.
He looks like a Jeremy Piven-ish Michael Moore.
Is Piven canceled or is Piven good to go?
I don't know.
He's post-canceled, right?
Is he good to go?
Yeah.
Why was he canceled in the first? Why does anybody get canceled? Well, why don't know. He's post-canceled, right? Is he good to go? Yeah. Why was he canceled in the first one?
Why does anybody get canceled?
Well,
why don't you start
with Bill Cosby?
He's out of jail.
He got his,
he's uncanceled.
Do the crime, you know?
Yeah.
Do the time.
Why did Cuomo?
Although he got out
on a technicality.
Cuomo got canceled
because he's Italian.
That's true.
Yeah.
Not a pervert.
Nope.
100%.
I don't feel safe anymore.
As an Italian?
I have three.
My last name ends in a vowel.
I'm in danger.
People are going to be picking on you.
You are pretty handsy, Nick.
Off camera?
Yeah, big time.
Like even when you guys tell me to stop.
You're just like, sorry, I'm just so Italian.
Yeah.
You want another massage?
I'm just like, I'm Italian. Don so Italian. Yeah. You want another massage? I'm just like, God.
I'm Italian.
Don't blame me.
Blame my Nona.
Yeah.
Fucking Nona.
Mimi and Nona.
Fuck off.
Fuck off, you Italian.
Yeah.
How are Nico and Dico taking this news?
Not well.
Not well.
Did we get the mascot at the bar?
Yeah.
We won the vote in a fucking landslide, but they're not doing it.
They're not honoring it.
He said he can't name this bull after his own son.
So let's name it Cuomo.
Why?
Let's call him Cuomo.
Because there's a lake after the lake, right?
After the lake or the bridge.
The bridge.
You see the Alec Baldwin thing that was like like Alec Baldwin comments on the Cuomo resignation.
It was like, today is a tragic day.
I didn't see that.
It was funny.
They used a funny picture of him too.
What was the...
Can you explain it to us?
Made him look real angry.
Oh.
Okay.
As opposed to regular Alec Baldwin, the nicest human being alive.
The nice one.
Yeah.
Innocent Alec Baldwin.
Happy Alec Baldwin, the nicest human being alive. Innocent Alec Baldwin. Happy Alec Baldwin.
Was it Alec Baldwin that didn't want to stop playing a game on his cell phone on a runway and had a tantrum?
No, who was that?
I think it was, wasn't it?
Yeah, that was the picture they used of him.
That's funny.
Who was it?
You're right.
No, it was Kiefer Sutherland.
No.
Kiefer, don't even play. It was Kiefer Sutherland. No. Kiefer.
Don't even play.
It was Kiefer Sutherland.
No, don't even play.
We're going to stop playing Temple Run.
What's Kiefer up to these days?
Kiefer?
He's just cashing those checks.
He's definitely in some straight-to-video releases.
He ruined my cousin's life.
What?
He's a very shy boy named Jack Bauer.
Oh, yeah.
Ever since 24 came out.
It was just every social. He can never introduce himself. He's more than just boy named Jack Bauer. Oh, yeah. And ever since 24 came out, it was just every social.
He can never introduce himself.
He's more than just shy.
He's something.
But Jack is, you can go by John.
You could always switch up a Jack.
You could change that.
No, they're Filipino.
Oh, fuck.
Can't do shit there.
Wait, you're half.
You're half Filipino cousin Jack Bauer.
I have two half Filipino cousins
It happens
So you have one whole Filipino cousin
They already changed once
They're gonna
Theoretically yes
Oh you're not from Mississippi
They're both women
So you can't combine women
Fuck my house
It makes one full man
What is happening here
Yeah it does
Pay wise
Strictly fiscally
You think there's gonna be
eight chicks tomorrow night?
No
I'm trying to make this happen
Oh
Like
Really trying?
Can we swag?
There was a few
that were like
Can we get in?
Yeah
Can we get in?
Fuck
You should fuck tomorrow night
There are a few chicks coming
A few?
How many?
Multiple
What?
I mean this goes without saying
but dibs
damn it
yep sorry
do we have any camera people coming?
nah
we're not even documenting this
we're actually using their tech
so
this guy bars tech
I'm sure they're always using tech
we actually have a game boy camera
plenty of experience they're gonna using Tab to come up with a Game Boy camera. Plenty of experience.
They're going to be filming
on a GoPro.
All business beats
signed off on it.
Oh, God.
You don't think
there's a problem
with the guy
that we viciously heckle
nonstop,
belittle him,
shit on him.
You don't think
there's an issue
with him being like,
yeah, they're all set.
Just send them to Williamsburg.
If our streams get more
than 700 viewers,
they look like PowerPoints.
This is going to be
we're going to show up
and they're going to
hand us like a
rotary phone.
Yeah.
We're using a
Williamsburg bars tech.
I feel like they might
be kind of big time.
They're having their
own separate documentary
being filmed.
There's way too many
things happening.
That doesn't take Why don't we just bring a camera
guy like why is that such a big deal because we're using their tech it's getting like streamed to our
youtube our youtube channel like cameras are getting cut here we'll be cutting social there
but as far as like the camera and the setup we're using their existing stuff
williamsburg bars pride themselves on not having technology
they don't have TVs
they're going to just be
taking a series of photos
of us with flashbulb cameras
it's going to smell like
gunpowder
buy the flipbook
we can't wait
when we show up
we have to sit in one place
for the entire night
we're going to be using
the pony express for callers
they're going to draw us
what is that
they have primitive fetishes
yeah they do
no TV who are these people I don't know there's some breaking news it's Isabella's entourage Draws. Yeah, what is that? They have primitive fetishes. Yeah, they do. No TV.
Who are these people?
I don't know.
There's some breaking news.
The rest is Isabella's entourage.
Oh.
What's the breaking news?
Jeopardy has announced a host.
Oh.
Michael Richards.
Yep.
He was in the running, right?
No, he got it.
Michael Richard.
Michael Richard.
Is it Michael Richards Kramer?
Yeah.
Wait, that's Blossom?
Nice comeback from the whole...
Mayim Bialik?
What?
Dude, I...
Mayim Bialik went on the battle rap show.
I coached Mayim Bialik on how to rap.
Hell yeah, you did.
Was it a woman?
Was this...
Was she more in real life?
I don't know what you said.
You talked to a woman?
Mayim Bialik.
No, it's Michael... Who was it? Michael Richards Kramer, the guy who said the N-word a bunch of timesambiolic. No, it's Michael.
Who was it?
Michael Richards, Kramer, the guy who said the N-word a bunch of times.
He's the Jeopardy host now.
So why was Myambiolic just updated?
Myambiolic.
Maybe drop that name for nothing.
She's doing the primetime version.
Let's see it again.
What does that mean, the primetime version?
I don't know.
When they do it special, like Celebrity Family Feud.
So we're going to have two different hosts?
MC Primetime and Spinoff Series of the Popular Quiz Show. Do you think Jeff to have two different hosts? MC primetime
and spinoff series
of the popular quiz show.
Do you think Jeff D'Lo
was ever brought up
in the...
What's a spinoff series
of Jeopardy?
In the meetings?
Definitely.
Do you think his name
was brought up?
Yeah, probably.
Had to kick it around a little bit.
Basically, whoever is the host,
people are not going to like.
I don't agree with that.
I saw them talking about
having some dude as a host
in the comments
where like,
Trebek would have hated this.
Yeah, but those aren't real people.
Yeah, I guess that's true.
Like Jeopardy is watched by millions.
Yeah.
Not some random dude on Twitter who's upset about everything.
Yeah.
But if you're.
You gotta unplug, brother.
I know, I do.
I hate Twitter.
Yeah, well, you hate TikTok too and you downloaded it again today.
No, I did not.
Yeah, I saw you on Twitter.
No, I didn't.
When was the last time you watched it?
I haven't been on TikTok in months.
Now, Gaz did join the show yesterday.
I don't have TikTok on my phone and I have space for it now.
We want him to grow on other platforms.
Oh.
Which I didn't understand.
I think he wants you to grow on other platforms.
He was like, yeah, you're doing good.
You don't really try and grow on any other platforms though.
And I was like, well, I don't really need to.
Oh.
No, but I have followers on Instagram and TikTok.
You're 20.
It's time to plateau.
But why?
You just coasted for the next 20 years.
I'm just going to keep on doing what I've been doing.
Even though your boss told you to do the opposite.
There's no reason to. You are growing. I know. That's what I
said too. Growing on YouTube, TikTok.
Instagram. Instagram and Twitter.
What else? Parlor.
Your clubhouse has been
dormant. I went viral on clubhouse yesterday.
Yeah? I said some fuck shit.
Eight list tissue.
Oh, speaking of which. You were in the moan chat room?
Yeah. Oh, I let out the deepest moan.
Tyler O'Day is resigning.
I know.
It's a bummer.
So we're going to do one last O'Daniac ranking.
That's going to be something.
Before he goes off into the sunset.
Probably next week is Grit Week, then the week after.
We'll do it then.
Is he going to have to station himself at the top?
I don't understand.
I feel like you need to really get to the spirit of the building. You have to tweet from the top. Yeah, at the top. I don't understand. Can we get him in here?
The spirit of the building, you have to tweet from the top.
Yeah, from the top.
I don't want to see those four-inch inseams
from the observation deck below.
What's the royalty holdings?
We don't have a microphone in here anymore.
They took away the microphone.
I'll give up my seat one time.
Why did that happen?
I think somebody broke it during the night.
This microphone right here. What do you think somebody broke it during the night. This microphone right here.
What do you mean someone broke it during the night?
During the night.
Whenever it happened.
TJ, is that what happened?
Somebody took it apart or something?
Someone snuck in here during the night.
We got into the studio today.
There was no mic.
Did you eat your lunch, Brandon?
No.
Go eat it.
No, go eat it.
Go eat it.
Go eat it.
You know you want to.
What did you get?
I didn't get lunch yet. Come on. Give Tyler your seat. Go order lunch and go eat it. You know you want to. What did you get? I didn't get lunch yet.
Come on, give Tyler your soup.
Go order lunch and go eat it, big boy.
Tyler, please.
Spread your legs a little.
Sit down.
Let those thighs out.
Yes, sir.
I can't wait to hear the sound of the leather sticking to you as you stand up.
Well, I don't want to do what Dave did to you because I thought maybe that was probably not great for your future employer.
No, of which I'm waiting on a phone call from.
Oh, do you think there's a chance?
You lost the job yesterday.
Closer to the mic.
Right up against the mic.
Right up against the mic.
I would hope not.
But do you think there's a chance?
I don't know.
Sounds like.
Sounds like.
Mr. O'Day.
Louder is what you're telling me?
Higher? Put it right put it right
to your lips and apart that's set apart right sounds like buddy you can't go anywhere because
we got you for life yeah is that you're horrified are you seriously like maybe not gonna uh-huh is
it seriously gonna maybe call you i i'm i'm awaiting a phone call hey tyler we don't want
you like we're they ratioed every time now. I mean, their Twitter probably grew a lot. Yeah, it grew like 10%.
Huge for them. I have a theory, Mr. O'Day. May I? Sure. My theory is that the story of Tyler O'Day
is a long and fantastic one. And what you're doing right now is having a view of the entire room
rather than just the couple feet of the room
right in front of you.
I think that Tyler O'Day
really might be the mayor of New York City one day.
And I think planting the seeds
of these major landmarks,
these different types of job opportunities
and different scopes of people with whom you'll
be interacting will be germane
to your future run
towards mayor of New York City. Yeah, I can
only work at public landmarks from now on.
Yeah, I don't hate it. From here, we'll do the vessel
and then... No, no.
Just talk to KB about it.
You don't like this. What do you do? Try to get people not to
kill themselves on that thing?
I think that's an important one.
That was what I was seeing a lot on Twitter.
Like, oh, does Barstool have nets?
Does Barstool have nets so their employees don't throw themselves off of it?
You saw that on Twitter.
You've had scaffolding for 20 months.
Who said that?
I saw I was looking at O'Day's replies to his tweets.
What building could poach you guys?
The Empire State Building.
It would get you?
I mean, depending on the job.
Yeah.
I don't understand. I bet you the Empire State Building. It would get you? I mean, depending on the job. Yeah. I don't understand the, like, I get Dave didn't want to lose O'Day, but I think it's pretty cool.
Who's your competition?
Which buildings have more followers?
The White House has to, right?
The Burj Khalifa?
The Burj does.
Yeah, I don't know.
They go viral.
The Patronus Towers?
You've got to find out.
I've got tunnel vision. I don't care. Everyone search a different tower. Let's see don't know. They go viral. The Patronus Towers. You've got to find out. I've got tunnel vision.
I don't care.
Everyone search a different tower.
Let's see what you've got to go with.
So help me God if the Space Needle has more.
I don't think so.
How many followers does...
One World Trade only has like 16,000.
Wow.
Wow.
We know what happens to bears.
I mean, KB, you should run that social and just tweet like, could be worse.
Still here.
Update, still here.
That actually could be worse.
I'm actually going to apply to that.
And for the sake of the bid, I will leave.
Golden Gate Bridge, 17.9 thousand followers.
Okay.
Not good.
Not good.
What a joke.
Yeah, what an unstable job the Golden Gate Bridge is, though.
Look at the Burj.
Because it rocks.
440 on the Burj.
Oh, dude.
All right, that's the competition.
How are you not fucking doing that?
Oh, Eiffel Tower, 333.
Come on, man.
We're going to take them all.
All right, so you're not even.
Are there any buildings with a million?
First building with a million would be something.
The White House?
The White House, The White House.
But that doesn't count.
That's a sentient being at that point.
That's a fact.
So tell me about the motive.
I feel like you kind of debunked the mayor thing.
I, in my heart of hearts, thought it was a really special and cool opportunity
and something that I could really build and be a part of.
He's getting money.
How big is the bag?
Yeah, what's the paycheck looking like?
After taxes.
Or before, whichever one you feel comfortable with.
We're just saying big terms.
Compared to a bird, is it like an albatross?
By not saying your salary, it's a big fuck you to your coworkers
because it gives you guys the power. Oh, he makes this much? So your new coworkers,'s a big fuck you to your coworkers because it helps you guys. It gives you guys the power.
Oh, he makes this much?
So your new coworkers, you're saying fuck you to them.
I would never do such a thing.
So do you think, what was their response yesterday?
From who?
Your future boss.
Oh, I have not heard.
I mean, I have not heard yet.
And what, did they text being like, we need to talk?
They asked if we could just hop on a quick call.
Oh.
I doubt it's a big deal.
What about Notre Dame?
How many has Notre Dame had?
What was the actual words they used?
Can we hop on a quick call?
Oh.
Quick, though.
You're fired.
Nothing's quicker than ripping a Band-Aid off.
But at least you still have this job.
Here?
Yeah.
I do.
I would feel really bad.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, you're making less money.
You would resent.
Would you still leave Barstool if that happened?
No comment.
Oh, what?
So you're gone.
Tyler, I'm just sad.
I wish you well.
I actually genuinely do.
I'm sad that you're leaving, but I understand.
I'm going to follow the Empire State Building. Yeah, I am too. I used to have. I'm sad that you're leaving, but I understand.
I'm going to follow the Empire State Building.
Yeah, I am too.
I used to have an app.
It was a secret app. I'm going to reply and say, hold this ratio, Tyler.
Every fucking tweet.
Were you going to say that?
I had an app that you could change the color of it.
No, you didn't.
No, you got a specific.
That never existed.
The Empire State Building one never existed.
What is this?
What is this?
Yes, I did.
It never existed.
It never existed. You got a? Yes, I did. It never existed. It never existed.
You got a time slot of like five minutes,
and you could pick the color of the Empire State Building.
It was the most interaction I've ever gotten on Instagram.
The Bank of America Tower, the H&M Tower, One World Trade.
Yes, it did.
I can go back into my archives on Instagram.
Go into your archives.
Wow.
He's confident.
Yes.
So what else are you going to be doing?
In life?
Yeah, no, besides like.
Are you still going to come into the office?
Yeah, no, I'll work out of here.
Yeah, yeah, cool.
I'd actually be fine.
Dave said that was fine.
I can keep my desk and everything.
We're in the Empire State.
You're only going to be like a block away.
Yeah, I'm not far.
We can still do lunch.
I know how much you love our lunch. We're in the Empire State. We You're only going to be like a block away. Yeah, not far. We can still do lunch. I know how much you love our lunches.
Yeah, I do.
We're in the Empire State Building.
We got those chicken sandwiches the other day.
I'm not sure.
Or maybe not at all after this call.
Can we give you some scenarios at the Empire State Building and what you tweet about it?
Maybe.
All right.
I fucking jump off the tip.
I got one.
Tweet the news article.
Are you okay?
No. I'm liquid. I got one Tweet the news article I have a good one Are you okay? No
I'm liquid
Darn
What a shame
He's good
He's good
He is very good
What about a little kid
Pukes
It's the 20th anniversary
Of 9-11
Oh yeah
And there's a plane
Not going directly
To the Empire State Building
But it's lingering
What the fuck does that even mean?
It's lingering.
It's just idling.
It's like a helicopter.
Yeah, it's a helicopter.
The first plane helicopter.
I mean, yeah.
One of your first tweets will probably be for the 20th anniversary of September 11th.
Let's workshop it.
I miss you, big bros.
Yeah.
Imagine if you never met the broskies.
From the perspective of the Empire State Building.
With both of them in the same...
Couldn't be me.
TBT.
I want to hear about the upcoming rivalry with Clem,
who is at a long-standing feud with the Empire State Building.
Yeah.
What did he say?
Clem hates the Empire State Building. I know, and I feel bad doing this to Clem, because he's clearly goaded. Yeah, he has. The Empire State Building. Yeah. What did he say? Clem hates the Empire State Building.
I know, and I feel bad doing this to Clem because he's clearly goaded.
Yeah, he is.
Yeah, so what are you going to do?
Are you going to un-goat him?
No.
No, I would never un-goat Clem Zingas.
I feel like having somebody like that would be good to have on the board.
It's like the most staunch disapproval of the Empire State Building.
How do we convince this guy that it's a good building?
True, yeah.
He would try to...
Flipping him?
I mean, he was the original enemy.
Sell me this building.
King Kong.
When Eddie said King Kong, I was dying.
Oh, King Kong.
King Kong.
All right, so it didn't go great yesterday.
The response from the general public has been fantastic good good because you
deserve that you do but the show the show uh could have gone better yes i i thought i well i thought i
did well i think that dave you have to understand dave just is uh and i also agree with him on this
part is it's funny to just say like we lost to a building yes like
it's a funny premise yeah no it is and uh yeah it's a funny premise um but maybe we didn't lose
the game sounds like it's not be something so are you gonna stay if you know he's gone uh i think i
would be uh play that little such a rage seriously Seriously? Kind of, yeah.
Yeah.
What about Central Park?
What if you're like Central Park's guy?
That would be cool.
That would be really cool.
Because you're outside.
Running.
You're running, yeah.
Road races.
Tell me that the running content
is not going to stop.
No.
Yeah, are you still going to be
tweeting from your personal a lot?
Sure.
Yeah, I mean,
just keep the course.
You feel down right now.
I don't like this.
What do we do?
What are you going to rank?
What am I going to rank?
I don't know.
I could rank buildings.
I could rank people.
No,
I think just another
final O'Day.
Cindy Buncheff.
Just an absolute potpourri.
Ms. Buncheff.
This time with no
biases,
no ulterior motives
about sucking up the coworkers.
You can just have your real name.
Cody Lanza, actually.
You can say what you actually think of Cody Lanza.
My true evil feelings.
Every time we say that name, I think of the other guy.
Adam.
Bad last name.
Who was phenomenal at Dance Dance Revolution.
Is that true?
Yeah.
How do you know that?
There's footage.
How many years are we planning to stay?
That's when his brain is like,
I'm scared.
The Empire State Building is going to be around for
the 90th anniversary.
So I think I'd like to be there for the next 90 years.
That's so strange.
Yeah, you made me feel queasy.
I've done weird
deep dives into that kind of stuff,
but that is something.
That's too deep.
Just imagining.
Well, it's more imagining you watching, sitting alone,
like late at night watching a guy who killed a bunch of first graders
play Dance Dance Revolution.
And it's not because you like Dance Dance Revolution.
Have you ever watched any other Dance Dance Revolution videos?
No, it's just one of those morbid things
of, look at this guy, just
having a grand old time
at an arcade, and then
it just, like... Yeah, again,
queasy's back. Kind of human.
Kind of bringing it back.
It's like in the magazines when it's like,
celebrities are just like us.
Yeah.
A game I wouldn't expect.
Alright, Tyler,
how can we help fix this?
Well, first and foremost,
I don't know if there needs to be a fix.
I think we should keep that mindset.
I think you're in denial.
I don't think there's going to need to be a fix.
And if there is, I'll step up.
So if, all right,
let's hypothetically say
there needs to be a fix.
What can we do?
I don't know if there would be anything.
Yeah. What if we threatened to jump don't know if there would be anything.
What if we threatened to jump off the Empire State Building unless they keep your hiring?
I don't want to cause any more problems for them.
Okay, all right.
That's fair.
All right.
I'm spitballing here.
I'm looking a little lumpy in this chair today.
No, you don't.
You look like a king.
There's no reason.
We just need to drop below the waist.
And I read a comment yesterday, and they were like, I agree.
There's no reason this show needs to be a full-body show. God damn it.
You are so deep into the internet.
I know.
I don't know what you're talking about.
But the thing is, if we were too zoomed in, you could only see one of us at a time.
How do you have this much time to read every tweet and comment?
Because I like to...
You're a sick boy.
You are.
I like to...
Like, you were reading Tyler O'Day's comments.
Yeah, my God.
I was.
Which even I wasn't preaching.
Yeah, what?
Tyler, is it true a coin could fall through a skull?
Are you sure?
Maybe that should be your first tweet.
I don't think you could get a coin.
I believe that myth has been busted.
Copyright discrimination.
It would kill a human if it landed on their head.
That was the myth.
Yeah, but you couldn't.
You just can't.
A sack of your way of golden dollar would destroy me.
What do you mean you can't?
I don't think the terminal velocity of a penny is enough to really do that.
I agree.
I don't think that would kill me.
I think it would be like.
You'd be like.
So can we use you?
Can we do a yak live from underneath the Empire State Building and people drop coins on us?
How tall is it?
About 1,400 feet.
Do you know how tall it is?
So 10 meters per second per second?
You don't know the...
Okay.
I'm trying to make this better for you, but that's like...
You don't know your height.
Yeah.
We know how tall our boss is.
He's 5'5".
He's not the boss.
He's going to be the Empire State.
Yeah, that's right.
I said that last night.
I said we're going to do an Odiniac ranking before Tyler goes and becomes a building.
Yeah.
You are a building.
You're a transformer.
Did you tweet the LOL at Dave?
No.
No, I don't know.
No, that guy stinks in his job.
Really?
I'm not the keys to the castle.
I thought it was funny.
You thought so?
LOL?
What about the replies to it?
I would have done cry.
Did you see the replies?
You would have done cry.
I would have done cry.
But I feel like the fact that they did the LOL means they're not going to like.
Yeah, that was 24 hours ago.
Has there been
hate
hate crimes
against the Empire State Building
like realistically
I'm getting a photo
I'm getting a photo
take it live on air
take it live on air
take it live on air
will you come back
and give us a thumbs up
sure
I feel really bad about it
I do too
why
I mean it wasn't us
so I don't feel that bad
he's just going through anxiety
they're probably thrilled
they're gonna be like.
Do you think buildings get chicks?
Not anymore.
I fucked up with a celebrity last night.
Dude.
Who?
Leo?
More famous.
Yeah.
Older.
Older.
Taller.
Dude, they don't want to be racier every time they tweet.
I know.
I feel really bad.
Why, though?
And that's just a reminder.
We're all stuck here forever. Yeah, I know. that's just a reminder. We're all stuck here forever.
Yeah, I know.
That's what it is.
Absolutely no chance
to ever leave.
There's no way
he's going to stay
if he gets fired from the job.
No, I think he has to stay.
I think it's a good reason.
You can't just leave jobs
if you have no other job.
He just lets out
a really deep sigh
and trudges back in here.
He would take the company down.
Tyler O'Day.
All right, so Tyler, we're waiting.
Thumbs up.
Yeah, this could be really bad.
This is eye-opening for all of us.
How come you guys didn't tell me the seat was empty again?
He just left.
He just left.
When did he leave?
Four minutes ago, five minutes ago.
The seat was empty.
I didn't see him in the hallway.
I feel like that's a lie.
He's probably still sticky.
Did he come in the chair? No.
I can see him.
Is he pacing? Reminder, we're doing
two hours today. We're in hour one.
Yes, sir.
It's all good. Whatever. I don't want to
say anything. What are you trying to be like
go with the flow? No, I'm just, yeah.
What do you want me to do? Do cool, Brandon.
That was
cool, Brandon.
That was all I had. What do you want me to do? Do cool Brandon That was cool Brandon That was all I had What do you want me to do to cool Brandon?
Well we have to at least wait to see what happens with Tyler O'Day
What's he doing?
He's finding out whether he has a job or not
I have a direct view of him
Is it bad?
Crack the door a little bit more
I don't want to jinx anything but it doesn't look good
What?
I'm not even kidding
Are you serious?
You're a hypochondriac though
He's going to give us a thumbs up or thumbs down
What's he doing in there?
He's talking to the building.
Complete straight face.
He's bargaining for his life.
There's no smile.
You think when you get, oh, we're hiring you, you get to smile, right?
No, that's not.
Is the building mad?
The building's mad.
I think so.
I don't think the building likes to get dragged.
The building mad at Dave?
Yeah.
And you a little bit?
What did I do?
You did some.
What?
Didn't you?
The janitor of the building was up earlier this morning.
I just said I found out and I also say fuck the Empire State.
I mean, we're just going to have to match his salary, what he was getting there, right?
To keep him.
What, give him an entire building?
Yeah, we have to build him a taller building.
The janitor was up earlier this morning.
He just got his hand against the wall.
He's like, she's angry.
What's the matter, girl?
What's gotten into you?
Calm down, girl.
Once you've signed an offer letter and you've accepted, there's no real reason
to have a phone call about anything.
Oh, Steven, don't say that.
I'm trying to give you the business side of it.
It's not good.
He said it's not good?
He's giving visible signs
of like...
Distress?
Yeah, I'm going to
stop watching.
Keep watching.
No.
This would bum me out so bad,
but also Sneaky would be awesome
because I love Tyler O'Day
and I want him to keep working.
But he said he's not even
going to keep working here.
Oh, he's got to. I don't think in any way he would be awesome because I love Tyler O'Day and I want him to keep working. But he said he's not even going to keep working here. It's not. Oh, he's got to.
I don't think in any way he would be awesome.
I think Dave would give him a big raise and a huge vacation.
Like, you'd have to.
Dave did make him a pretty – didn't he say he was like,
why don't we, like, give him more money and, like, let him pull back more?
Hey.
Oh, man.
That would work.
That's a bell.
Uh-uh-uh, Adam.
Mm-mm.
Yeah. Uh-uh-uh. Mm-mm. Uh-uh.
They're standing right there.
They're standing right there.
I love it.
This happened on...
I want to be a part of this entourage.
Imagine if I was a part of that three.
Go get into it.
Billy's been doing laps for all morning.
Fucking Billy Carlin.
Oh, he's saying hi.
Yo.
What's the...
More screen time for Nick. Oh, my God saying hi. Yo. What's the sound? More screen time for Nicky.
Oh, my God.
That was so creepy.
She looked right at the TV.
And it just zoomed in on her.
Her fucking ass.
Yeah, she probably hates having her ass on a screen.
Broadcasting on the internet.
This is creepy.
He's a weirdo.
What an invasion of privacy. She's on the ones and twos
We should get a camera tomorrow though
We should just have someone come with at least
A stool set with Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Rudy
Viva
Viva Viva Viva V. Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
What are you doing tomorrow night?
What are you doing tomorrow night? What are you doing tomorrow night?
I have no plans.
All right, you're coming with us.
To what?
We're doing a live show in Williamsburg.
So you can do stool scenes.
We're going on the road.
We're doing the world championship.
Ski ball world championship.
You just moved there?
I just moved to Williamsburg.
Perfect.
So bring your camera.
We'll do stool scenes.
Let's do it.
All right.
Nice.
That was easy.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
When can a pirate ship take down the largest building in New York?
That was a little too sarcastic.
It's a little riddle.
I'm getting worried.
Can we get a zoom in on Brandon's face with the time?
Let's get someone else in here and chant Viva though Get Josh
He's the heart and soul
Of the Viva
I don't think he has it anymore
He lost it
Hard
Hard time
Robbie
Robbie
Viva Viva V. Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva.
Viva. Nice, Robbie.
Robbie, can you see how Tyler's doing in there?
No, no.
No, no, don't.
Don't.
Nothing.
Don't go in there.
Don't go in there no matter what.
Let's just say there's a fire in there.
Don't go in that room. Oh. Oh, he say there's a fire in there. Don't go in that room.
Oh, he actually is about to do his show.
Yes, walk in.
See if you catch anything.
It'd be a stray tear.
So now, oh, gosh.
This is just not good.
This feels morally wrong.
You're the only one looking.
This is a podcast room.
Robbie has to go in there.
I know, but we sent him in.
Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh.
We didn't sent him in. He's not pacing anymore I don't know Now the Grinch's heart got bigger
Tyler's shorts got shorter
They shrunk eight times
What?
He refused to give a thumbs up or thumbs down
To Zah
He got a thumbs up
Then he got fired?
He's coming back
I mean it sounds intense
He does not look great but he did put his thumb up.
Oh, that's not good.
That's not good.
That's a leave-me-alone thumbs up.
Yeah, that's a, hey, kick it.
That's a paralyzed not dead when they're wheeling you out.
Fuck.
Do people do that?
Yeah.
Johnny Damon did it.
He thought he was going to hold it in the stadium.
Oh, like actual people who are collegiates.
All right, but if he's walking back and forth from the studio,
he's asking me to comment.
I'm so nervous for what I'm going to have for lunch.
I haven't eaten yet either.
I just ordered a bunch.
Yeah.
Ordered a bunch of what?
For yourself.
Oh, my God.
Sandwiches?
For how many?
Two to four. Two to four. Last night. Sandwiches? Yeah. For what? How many? Two to four.
Two to four?
Last night was hell.
Oh,
to tell?
We have an hour
and five minutes left.
All right.
Take your time.
This was a lot.
What was hell?
I ordered wings.
Okay.
At around seven.
Slow down.
So they were going to be here
at eight.
What kind of wings?
Were they grilled? They were like 730. Like a buffalo. They were bone in, right? Slow down. So they were going to be here at 8. What kind of wings? Were they drilled?
They were like 7.30.
Like a buffalo.
They were bone in, right?
Slow down.
They were boneless.
Were you thinking about anything else?
No.
I was actually, we were waiting to watch the Dave Portnoy show with the Tello Day thing.
Okay.
And I ordered the wings at around 7.30.
So they were going to be here at 8.20 to 8.40.
It did that thing where you can't track the order.
It just says the order it just says
like the order is being prepared no map it's no map they started doing that yeah it's annoying
and um yeah so about around 820 rolls by and i get a notification it says your order may be there
soon wait that was like 830 probably yeah it was like 830 boning or boneless boneless boneless oh
they thought you were a pussy.
Yeah.
But there was an explanation to boneless.
You like eating your food faster and more efficiently, pussy.
Yeah, that was what it was.
I didn't want to get my hands messy.
I just wanted to eat food quick.
I was hungry.
Right.
Cool.
Chicken's great.
It is.
But it was slow.
You want to eat fast, but it was slow.
And it's processed meat.
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
And so 830 rolls around.
I get a notification that says your order may arrive soon.
May.
Did it?
May.
It did?
Hard May.
Oh, all caps May?
Eventually.
And so eventually like an hour goes by.
No, so it's a hard May, by the way.
Hard May.
Hard May.
Okay.
Eventually.
It is a soft word.
No, no, no.
It's a very soft word.
It's a very soft.
Stephen, go ahead. They were like, it might arrive. It might not arrive. Stephen. I have details soft word. No, no, no. It's a very soft word. May 2020. Stephen, go ahead.
They were like, it might arrive.
It might not arrive.
Go ahead, Stephen.
I have details on tomorrow.
Oh, okay.
That's probably good.
So we will be able to play skee-ball.
It's 10 rolls per.
That's it?
Well, 10 rolls is like a frame.
It's 10 rolls per.
Oh, okay.
I wasn't asking that.
I thought we were like listen guys once you do 10
you gotta get out of here
70 amongst all of you
so split them up
however you want
it'll be either
a 3 set match
or a 5 set match
they're still working that out
and we will
be able to
we'll be right next to
the skeeball lane
we'll be able to
both play and interview
Joey the cat
and the kid
oh sick
okay
well Joey the kid
doesn't do press
let's make sure
you just combine them
into one ultimate player.
Make sure we have enough microphones so we can talk to them.
We do.
All right, back to... And that'll be tomorrow night.
We'll be in Williamsburg. I want you to...
Send their bone in wings.
He starts boiling water.
Tell us. We gotta end the show with this.
Yeah, forget the wings story. The food never came.
We never came.
Unfortunately, you didn't realize we never cared about it.
Yeah, I know. Alright, Tyler, quickly
because Brandon's freaking out.
Brandon's staying. Please note
Brandon's next to me. Everything is okay.
Yes! Are you sure?
Yeah! Viva!
Viva! Viva!
Viva!
So, what was the call?
Was it okay? Yeah.
I was just making sure I was doing all right.
But were they like, hey, that was a lot?
Oh, they gaslighted you.
Did they mention like the Dave Portnoy?
They were like, yeah, yeah, they get it.
They were like, we want to let you know we care about you.
You just showed us all that we can leave.
Is the Empire State Building a stoolie?
Soon to be a cheapie as well.
Whoa.
Is Big Tasty,
is the Empire State Building Big Tasty?
Who's to say?
All right, so now we actually have to figure out,
you have two weeks left,
how we can submarine your new job
and you have to stay.
That's fine.
You have two weeks?
I have the footage of me changing the color.
Can we do top 25 buildings, bottom 25 employees?
Yes.
Yeah, let's do that.
Yeah.
And we have two weeks to make sure that Tower of Day never leaves these doors.
Top 25 buildings, lowest 25 employees?
Yeah.
Not physically low.
Physical can play a factor.
No, just physical can play a factor.
Physical absolutely is a factor.
If you're short, you have to be considered.
Do you think I'm top 25 shortest at this company?
Yes.
How tall are you?
And it's bottom 25 tallest.
It's not top 25 shortest.
You're trying to make it out to a good thing.
Top 25? It will have to be on a Thursday. Crack the top 25.
It will have to be on a Thursday.
Okay.
I will do any demand you want.
Next Friday I'm at a wedding, and then the Friday after that is Ruff and Rowdy.
Oh, muzzle.
Are you going to Ruff and Rowdy?
No, but you are.
Oh, yeah, that's true.
Thank you for looking out for me.
Who loves you more than I do?
No one.
Nobody.
Nobody.
Well, maybe the building.
No, seriously.
When you become part of the building, wouldn't your love for me transfer to it?
What's the wardrobe there?
Can we take a break for four hours or two?
What's the wardrobe?
Wardrobe?
I believe it's a bit-
Can you wear whatever you want?
No, it's a bit more business.
What about a hat?
Can you wear a hat?
To be determined.
It took me three years to wear a hat here, so I'll have to gauge that.
Yeah, but that was your own.
Get the fuck out.
Bye, everybody. I will take you through all the acts It's the act
It's the act
Can I push stop?
Stop
Yeah, you can press stop over there
I don't know if we can take off the slate
Down in the back or not.
Let's see.
Wait, you need the slate for tomorrow?
Since there's no show then, no.
Okay.
Just write it.
Yeah, yeah, okay.
Yep, we'll do.
I'll get that too.