The Yak - Donnie's On His Way To Venice, The Cranford, New Jersey Of Italy | The Yak 12-14-21
Episode Date: December 15, 2021waterrrrrrrYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
It is the Yak. Kyle walking in. It is the Yak.
Kyle walking in.
It is the Yak.
Big Cat will be here shortly.
I think they're finishing up the pro football football show downstairs,
wherever they do it.
I don't know.
I haven't been invited on that show ever.
So I'll steer the bus for a second.
I had to go get a couple replacements jersey jerry is back
in in his make it sound like i was like the last resort or something like that replacements well
you are a replacement i mean yeah sure but don't say it like that slow your roll stud champion
yeah you're a replacement yeah i mean but don't make you make it seem like you know i'm like some
bottom of the barrel type of i didn't say any such thing i said you were replacing oh and you're a replacement. Yeah, I mean, but don't make it seem like, you know, I'm like some bottom-of-the-barrel type of guy.
I didn't say any such thing.
I said you were replacing Owen.
You're in Owen's seat today.
It's his own seat.
I respect that for sure.
Yeah.
Replacement.
That's fine.
Go ahead.
Kyle?
Carried away.
Yeah, he's a little bit too big for his britches.
That's what Jersey Jerry is.
Jersey Jerry.
No, you're not.
No way.
I wouldn't say that one second.
No way. Big for his britches. No way. I like that shirt, Kyle. It's throw is. Jersey Jerry. Jerry. No, you're not. No way. I wouldn't say that one second. No way.
Big fresh britches.
No way.
I like that shirt, Kyle.
It's throwback.
Really nice.
Vintage.
It's vintage.
Yeah.
I spent my spectrum internet money on this.
What was your spectrum internet money?
So I don't have internet.
Oh, okay.
At home?
So I paid for it.
Yeah.
And I got all the materials, the modem and the router.
But I couldn't figure out how to set it up, so I just stopped paying the bill.
Now I don't have Wi-Fi in my apartment.
Is that why you leave your laptop on my desk overnight?
Somebody tried to get me, and they tried to prank me.
We were in a prank war.
It's not laziness or poverty.
It's therapeutic. I don't want to want if i have to do computer stuff i don't want to be in my
apartment so but when you're at home like do you scroll your phone or anything at night yeah yeah
so you're not completely away from it yeah and you aren't really a big like show watcher to begin
with it's not like you have those shows you want to watch when you're home i was that was my thing in high school i was the big show walker the show what you would always
you'd always be talking about the watcher you also viral you are knee-deep just sopranos yeah
knee-deep in a sopranos rewatch right now not a rewatch a watch just the first watch yeah yeah
like the breakfast chain how's that been going i love it i think it's the
best show ever i think everything it does is perfect and now i can't watch another show i
tried to watch the new dexter season didn't work i was like the way they portray violence the way
they portray killing scenes just sucks compared to soprano when i got hbo max i said i was going
to go back through all the shows i never watched i I did The Wire, but I haven't done Sopranos yet.
The guy from The Wire who passed abruptly was in Sopranos.
Was he?
Yeah.
So I have a question.
I know you don't really tweet anymore, but do you think you still use Twitter just as much?
Do you still scroll Twitter just as much?
I used to be very hip on every single Twitter trend.
You were.
So the wanton Don is here.
Now, I am bottom of the barrel, I feel like.
You're not bottom of the barrel.
Guys, we're just the last person to get called in.
How did I make you feel?
I'm inviting you guys.
No, no, no.
I'm very happy you invited me.
But normally, even if it's like a Friday,
Owen would bring in Frank the Tank over me,
and Frank the Tank has his own day of the week.
No, I don't think that.
First of all, Owen never acts on his own agency.
Owen is sent out to get guys.
But you're very, very high on the list of the replacements.
You're just –
You're right above Kat and right below Madeline Conroy.
Right below her, yeah.
Who is Madeline Conroy?
Oh, come on.
Oh, Matt?
I don't...
Mad Dog?
You're below Jordan as well.
Damn.
But, I mean, I'll take it.
See, it's so hard to know when you're in the office, though.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You have to get used to you being in the office.
Yeah, I know.
So, you've been living at an Airbnb in the slums of Jersey?
I wouldn't call it the slums.
It's just not the nice part.
Where?
It's built in the slums?
Journal Square.
I have a shared bathroom in the Airbnb.
Journal Square?
Where's that?
Journal Square is as deep as you can go in Jersey City.
But it's all right.
So you have a shared bathroom with how many people?
I think there was like two other people living in the one other room in the Airbnb.
Yeah, that's not bad.
But yeah, I mean, that's just for a week.
And then I'm heading back to Italy on Thursday.
Oh, that'll be nice.
What is your plan?
Don't have a lot of plans at the moment.
I'm just wrapping up this Balkan series
and then got to plan the next series.
The water polo team?
How did that come about?
That came about,
we just knew that water polo
is one of the most popular sports in Croatia.
Wait, really?
Yeah, I think it's one of their...
Who wins the Olympics in water polo?
Who's the heavy hitter? I think it is that Croatia wins a lot. like, wins the, like, Olympics in water polo? Who's, like, the heavy hitters?
I think it is that –
Croatia wins a lot.
That part of Europe.
Serbia won a lot.
Yeah, for some reason, most of the Balkans are great.
And so we just reached out to some teams,
and the Dubrovnik team just said we could swing through practice,
and it turns out they're the most decorated water polo club in the whole world.
Very difficult sport.
Were you treated well yeah i mean
they said i could maybe sit on the bench at the next olympics geez well that's i mean they were
just one practice you're gonna be in the olympics now i mean riding the bench did water polo that
is a tough sport just based on what i know from trying to like swim and then you add a
you can only use one hand three different
layers you're like allowed to drown like what happens underwater stays underwater so allowed
to drown well just like the refs can't really see what's going on underwater so you know if you want
to hold someone down for a bit no one's going to be the wiser so what is that what is the hardest
sport i would say water polo just on the body would be in the mix.
Is that recency bias?
No, I don't.
They're out there for an hour, treading water and swimming for an hour.
And swimming itself is.
There's two levels of hardness.
It uses the whole body.
How physically demanding is it and how hard is it to excel at?
How much skill does it take?
So when it comes to that, people, I would say, like, golf or baseball.
But when it comes to physicality, it's obviously wrestling and then big margin and then boxing.
Well, any fighting sport.
MMA.
Judo.
Water polo.
Yeah, I guess water polo, you don't really have the risk of getting hit in the face and knocked out very much.
I'm sure it happens, but you don't have that risk.
Swimming is maybe harder.
Than water polo?
For me, it is.
Staying afloat while trying to do a sport while staying afloat.
Yeah, it's like playing hockey.
I can play hockey, but then you throw skates in the mix.
I can't really skate and play hockey at the same time.
Well, then you can't play hockey.
Yeah, then I can't play hockey, then i can't play hockey but i mean yeah i could play uh street hockey with no roller
blades i could play foot hockey my uh my six-year-old's into hockey and i don't know how
i don't know what to do i forget you have different kids i have the whole kit yeah i have
six into hockey yeah the six-year-old like wants to play hockey
he's really into it and i don't know what to do i don't know how i've never played it so i don't
know how to teach him i did buy him some street hockey set santa claus gonna bring him a street
hockey set for christmas live vicariously through him force him to do whatever sport you wish you
excelled in as a youth and then make him carry that out regardless no i've been doing that
disdain for it. They're playing basketball.
I'm making sure that all my failures now are passed on to him.
So I'm good with that.
Well, you weren't a complete failure.
You played some ball in college.
I played a little ball.
It's best.
Yeah.
I was on the team.
I broke my leg.
I didn't play, but I was there.
Jerry, what was that?
No, it was funny.
It is funny that you kind of played ball and then broke your leg.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was a rough time in my life.
I was about 6'5", 180.
6'5", 180 is not a good mix.
My body type, I should be about 215.
That's a good-looking person.
But I've spent my life on the margins.
I've gone to 260 and 180 and that's the
that's the wrong way to treat 65 yeah what are you now yeah i'm about 265 no height wise i'm still
65 65 your height doesn't change that much does yours i don't know i think i've been the same
height for a long time how are you feeling i. Yeah, I can see you being your height at sixth grade.
Yeah, something like that probably.
It probably just never changed.
Did you get to your height early or was it late?
No, I was 4'11 going into freshman year.
Then you jumped.
You were always the short kid in the group?
Oh, yeah.
No, there was no girls even shorter than me until sophomore year girls
like sprout up before boys there's a couple years where yeah and that's where you got you get to take
that into consideration yeah you do um what about you donnie how was your height how was your height
evolution um i was uh i used to be really tall for my grade, for my age, and then all my friends eventually caught up.
But now I'm just more normal.
But I used to be tall.
You're still tall.
Yeah, I would look at that as tall.
How about the...
Yeah, you're tall.
You're six foot?
No, you're not.
Six one.
Yeah, look at his legs.
He's taller than that.
I'd say you're six two.
I grew at a young age.
I peaked too early.
Where's your energy at, Kyle?
Is it good?
Why?
I'm just wondering.
I'm just wondering if it's good.
Yeah, why?
Just wanted to make sure.
Okay.
I don't know what to do with it.
What?
I don't know.
What are you doing?
I'm just asking you about your energy.
Why do you transform into a different person every time you take the host chair?
I don't transform into a different person.
No, I don't.
You adopted an entirely different set of mannerisms and different personality and different cadence.
No, no, no.
You're different every time.
How am I different?
Yeah, I can already tell.
What's different about me?
You would never ask me that question.
I have asked you that question plenty of times.
No, you wouldn't.
I'm just curious about you.
You're taking up a whole different.
I want to know what's going on with you.
You're devolving into a different person, a person that I've never met before,
and it happens every time you do this.
Well, if you've never met him before, how do I do it every time?
That's how bewildered I am by your change of pace.
Well, I apologize.
I'll try to do better.
Are you sorry?
I apologize.
You shouldn't be.
I apologize.
It's just an observation.
What are you doing?
What is that?
Whenever you have to host, KB, you just forget how to talk.
He's way less fat than I am now. He's way less fat than I assume. What's you doing? Whenever you have to host KB, you just forget how to talk. He's way less fat than I assume.
What's going on?
Why did that guy knock on the window?
They're showing him a man.
The large gay man showed me his bear torso.
Oh, okay.
He's a borderline bear.
Yeah.
I don't know.
He seems like he's a bear.
Could I be a bear?
Because I have a very hairless chest.
I think all you have to do is be fat to be a bear.
Does a bear refer to your hair?
Well, you've got to be fat and hairy, but maybe just fat.
Husky or hairy man.
Yeah.
Jersey Jerry.
Yeah.
Husky or hairy or man.
You're not as hairy as I thought you were.
Well, that's because I shave.
Yeah.
You know?
Do you shave your chest? Yeah. Really? Yeah. Huh. You know? Do you shave your chest?
Yeah.
Really?
Yeah.
Huh.
You shave everything?
Your arms too?
Something like every couple months I'll do my legs.
Why?
Because you feel good.
I've never shaved my legs.
Did you have to shave your...
You don't have to do that for wrestling, do you?
A lot of wrestlers did because they want to look bright in a similar...
Water polo shave, I assume.
All the swimmers shave. All the swimmers.
All the swimmers, yeah.
Aquatics.
Yeah.
Shout out my new podcast, 51 Strokes, me and Stu Feiner, a swimming podcast.
That's going to be awesome.
First episode drops next week.
Nice.
Stu will probably have a stroke trying to do it.
Yeah.
I hope not.
Just going to be, I mean, just because every elite swimmer I've talked to,
they say swimming 51 strokes a day is the key to success.
What is a stroke?
Stroke is just like one.
That's one?
Okay.
Jerry, if you can do that every day, you've got some great things in your future.
It's Marty.
Marty's taking care of my back.
I had a couple patches of hair back there.
Marty took care of it.
You know, they grow in, like, weird patches patches sometimes how else would you do it yeah i have a friend with a hairy back and he's so ashamed of it
he won't even take his shirt off at the beach really and i asked him why don't you just shave
it and i guess he got laser surgery to get the hair removed yeah but like two percent of cases
the hair just grows back twice as thick if you have that done. And so now he just will never take his shirt off.
I've always heard that.
I've always heard that if you shave it, it'll grow back twice as thick.
But I don't know how the science behind that doesn't seem to line up.
It only happens to certain people.
You have a certain amount of hair in your body that your body can produce.
I don't know why that would double because you got rid of one layer.
It's kind of like slash and burn.
If you want something to grow well you
should burn it first and that never made sense either but that is the way you do it like you
burn the top layer off and then boom fresh fresh comes up yeah that laser stuff's probably really
expensive no yeah i don't get being insecure about your back hair yeah it's not like embarrassing
i think i i think there's a certain stigma of back hair, right? You don't have no back hair, Brandon?
I don't have any back hair.
I don't have chest hair.
I'm a hairless guy.
Really?
I barely have eyebrows.
I don't grow a lot of body hair.
KB, do you ever have any chest hair?
No, none.
You're blessed.
Yeah, but I don't think it's, like, gross.
I don't think it's unappealing.
Yeah, I think for, like, a girl, I don't think it's a deal breaker.
No, I don't think so. They come home with you, and then they see hairy back. They just walk out the door. I think I'm going's unappealing. Yeah, I think for a girl, I don't think it's a deal breaker. No, I don't think so.
They come home with you, and then they see hairy back.
They just walk out the door.
I think I'm going to disagree, guys.
I think back hair is disgusting.
I don't think there should be hair on back.
I don't like it as a man.
I think I'd be able to find a strand of hair on your back.
You could probably find a strand of hair, but you certainly couldn't find a lot of hair.
What?
Oh, shit.
Bullying the gays.
Have a seat.
I'm always welcome to that.
What did you just do? Just no less than two minutes ago,. Have a seat. Have a seat. I'm always welcome to that. What did you just do?
Just no less than two minutes ago,
you pulled a stunt,
you gained my attention,
and then you
lifted your blouse.
Well, I was trapped up
in the goon pit with Trish
for a whole hour and a half,
and I got a little stir crazy in there.
So I had to lift my blouse up
and show you my nipples.
You did lift your blouse.
What do you mean,
stir crazy with Trish?
In the goon pit, too?
Could we talk about that?
What is the goon pit?
The goon pit is, that's what we call it out and about podcast studio
when we sit there.
You have to listen to the goon pit.
Listen to our segment on the goon pit this week and you'll find out.
We all do shows in that room.
That room's not called the goon pit.
It is when Trish and I are in there.
What size shoe do you wear?
15.
Wow.
So Pat was like, he started to tell me what a goon party is.
And I'm a big goon guy, as in crab brain goons are my favorite food.
This is quite different.
Okay.
Gooning is when you pleasure yourself for hours and hours on edge,
not letting yourself finish.
And so a goon party is when there's a bunch of guys all erect but trying not to come?
Yeah.
We went to a live gooning in New York City just the other day after publicity's party at the winery.
There was a live gooning?
It was a live gooning we attended.
And there's a stage with gooning men?
No, it's just all over.
It's like it's happening everywhere.
It's on the pool table.
It's in the walls.
It's just everywhere.
In the walls?
In some cities. So it's a bunch of people on the precip. It's just everywhere. In the walls? In some cities.
So it's a bunch of people on the precipice of coming?
Yeah.
But there's no retention rate in that.
Well, it's the holidays.
It's camaraderie.
Is it like a game of tag?
When you come, you're out?
Is it like some sort of dodgeball going on?
I guess so.
Yeah, you probably don't want to do that in front of people.
You have to go.
It's taboo if you do.
Does anybody ever accidentally
come? Maybe.
I've never seen it.
My line of work. Who's Trish?
Pat.
Jesus.
What is this company turning into?
So you went from Patrick to Trisha to
now just Trish.
What happened to the common man for the common
man? Her full name is Trisha McAuliffe, but I shortened it to Trish. Now we're doing this. I like Trish. What? That's that short. What happened to the common man for the common man? You know what I'm saying? The Milton day.
Her full name is Trisha McAuliffe, but I shortened it to Trish.
And now we're doing this.
I like Trish.
Yeah.
My ex-girlfriend, her mother was the tan mom.
You ever hear about that?
Oh, yeah.
I know her.
Yeah.
I called her Trish.
Oh, you're the real one?
Yeah.
No.
My ex-girlfriend is the-
Daughter of the real tan mom?
Yeah.
Is she the one that went in the tanning booth with her?
Yeah.
No, no, no.
Her little sister.
Oh, lucky gal.
But she never –
Trish isn't normally here.
It was always a fake story, though.
She never went in the tanning booth.
Yeah.
What's going on there?
Well, I –
Woody.
Oh, there she is.
Yeah.
She looks like the top picture to the left now.
Oh, who's this?
No, but did she used to make my car wheels when you went over there?
Huh?
Did you have to go over to her house?
Oh, yeah.
She's one of the best cooks I've ever met in my whole life.
He used to date Tam Mom's daughter.
My car's here.
Well, I have to go, gentlemen.
I'm off to my second gooning of the day, but I'll be back Thursday.
Yep.
Get gooned up.
Be safe.
Godspeed.
Condragulations on the big fight.
Thank you so much.
Can a woman goon?
Do you have a personal driver?
You will not text me later.
Yes.
No.
Yes?
Well, yeah.
Uncle D gets me a free car.
Unbelievable.
Uncle D.
Uncle D, yes.
Uncle D.
Uncle D.
I wonder if he helped him buy the Cartier bracelet.
Cartier bracelet, huh?
Mm-hmm.
Nice.
Are you for or against camping that is steven chase big question
today are you for or against camping and i the phrasing is interesting to me see who would be
against camping i understand not not wanting to go camping but who would be like outwardly against it
yeah like any like anti-camp like a political stance yeah no just you would never want to go
camping if you had the choice.
No, and I like every aspect of it besides staying in a tent overnight, sleeping.
But I feel like you'd be a good camper.
I like camping.
I enjoy camping, but I haven't found a friend who wants to go camping with me for probably the last six years.
I'd go camping with you.
That would be fun.
We should do a little barstool camping retreat.
I would.
Okay. That'd be fun. Yeah. I've never been camping. You've never been camping with you. That would be fun. We should do a little barstool camping retreat. I would. Okay.
That would be fun.
Yeah.
I've never been camping.
You've never been camping.
You've never been camping.
No.
As long as we go and it doesn't rain, I'd be happy.
Ever been skiing?
No.
Snowboarding?
No.
I've also never skied.
Canoeing?
Never.
Kayaking?
Never.
What have you done?
Wow.
I'm a simple guy, man.
Yuppie activities.
I work and I just go home.
I just like being in bed.
All of these things that they're mentioning, camping, it's kind of blue-collar.
It is blue-collar.
Camping, maybe it was once blue-collar.
I feel like now it's just seen as rich white people.
It's the Brian Laund laundry archetype not rich i guess i
guess where we are here that's probably true for you guys where i'm from though like camping is
very much yes camping is very much an accepted part of culture that you know we're gonna go
camp by the creek and go fishing first thing in the morning that happens a lot
true so yeah my culture is a little different i I guess. Yeah, no, it is too.
I was just thinking of like a certain type of person,
like the crunchy granola trail mix eating lib.
The people who can afford to take four months off of work
to hike the Appalachian Trail.
Trustafarians.
What's that?
Trustafarians.
Yeah, I like that.
That's like when you see someone with dreadlocks, like a white dude with dreadlocks who has a trust fund.
And they actually exist.
At first I thought that was just like a saying, and since I've met two in real life.
Do you like them?
I didn't love them, but I could hang out with them.
I could be in the same room as them.
I've started doing something that I think I got the inspiration from you.
I've just started finding these YouTube things and just diving straight into the rabbit hole.
So there's this guy.
He's a very famous YouTuber.
Xiaoman?
Something like that?
Xiaoma NYC.
I hate him.
Okay.
I can't stop watching him.
I know.
There is an addictive part of his videos.
It's very addictive.
When he starts speaking Chinese and goes to Chinese restaurants.
He's like a white dorky dude.
He's a white dweeb who knows different languages.
He's fluent in multiple languages.
And all of his videos are titled like,
White guy, obliv like white guy. Right.
Oblivious white guy stuns Chinese restaurant employees by speaking fluent Chinese.
And all of it, it's obvious that he did like 10 test runs at local Chinese restaurants, filming himself speaking Mandarin in front of their employees.
Obviously, 90 percent of them don't give a fuck.
And then he posts like the 10% who have a reaction.
I'd like to see this, Scott.
Yeah, it really is.
It's lame.
I've watched two and loved it.
And then the third one, I started to fall off.
And then last night, I watched one I just outwardly did not like.
And the staying power here is very, very low.
But I watched one last night where he spoke to Jamaicans in Jamaica, Queens. And and he was really just speaking english but he was patois using the accent yeah he was
using yeah well he i mean i'll give him credit i mean it's impressive that he knows like like
right bengali and all this shit but he did one in arabic the other day he's like oh he knows a lot
of languages i thought it was yeah i thought it was only chinese yeah he's good at what he does
and he's making money from it so i'm not going to knock him too hard but i don't like him
yeah i got down that rabbit hole and like stopped myself before i like got to like 30 videos i
watched about five yeah how are you saying jama jama nyc yeah yeah i went with the approach of
just being in china not knowing how to speak chinese. And I didn't get nearly as many views as him being in America speaking fluent Chinese.
I mean, you get a good little bit of views, Donnie.
The Chinese restaurant industry, they're not friendly people, are they?
It depends on the restaurant.
I'll drop some Chinese every once in a while,
and most people appreciate it.
But I think it is very rude just to walk up to someone who looks Chinese
and start speaking Chinese to them.
Because there are American Chinese people who don't know Chinese,
and they'll just think you're trying to be racist if you come up.
But if you're in, like, Flushing, Queens, that pretty much is China.
You can speak Chinese the whole time.
But they don't have, like, a hospitality culture of like, you know, Americans seek tips with like going overly friendly.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's not in China.
There's no tipping, which is actually nice.
And you're allowed to just like yell for the waiter to come.
Like here you have to wait patiently.
But in China, you just go for will you win?
And you just like yell at them to come over.
And it's nice.
There's no like
i don't know i so the patrons are the rude ones yeah okay and i just feel like i don't know in
the u.s with tips it's like all right you you pretty much leave a solid tip regardless of how
good the service is now because you just not like they're not being paid that's just how it works
but um so i feel like it's kind of lost all meaning.
She would know Chinese.
Who that was.
Yeah.
Let's call her in and start speaking Chinese.
I don't know who that was either.
You just waved.
I just waved.
She looked very friendly.
Very happy to be here.
So I waved.
What else you got on here, Steve?
What is the best thing to eat over a campfire?
S'mores, chili, a can of beans or other?
Yeah, the classic three and then the other yeah uh a can of beans really on a campfire i like baked beans isn't that like a big western type deal i guess maybe i don't know
who would say not s'mores though s'mores are highly overrated. Very overrated.
Disagreed.
I don't think they're ever rated.
They're not regarded as anything other than a campfire snack.
No, I think they're regarded more highly than that. They should be a more predominant flavor.
I like s'mores flavored ice cream.
There should be more s'mores things.
Yeah, I agree with that.
I agree with that.
Pop-Tarts are pretty good.
Every time we talk about s'mores, or my family does it it sounds great we buy
everything all the ingredients and then by the third one you've got chocolate melting all over
your hand and stuff it's hard to bite into it's hard to bite into the marshmallows it's hot as
fuck like it's just it's i don't know maybe i haven't figured it out yet though um steven the
answer to this one is definitely in this room who in the office will survive the longest in the wild on their own?
Yeah, Donny.
Yeah, it's definitely me.
Donny, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I can handle discomfort to a high degree,
but I don't have a lot of, like, survival skills.
Like, I don't know how to make a fire.
Neither do I.
I have experience with being, like, without food or water for a while.
Yeah.
Me too.
It's led to irreversible eating disorders.
Yeah, you don't complain a lot, I would say.
But then I...
So I can never tell when you're actually having a good time or you could be having a horrible time.
And you act the same way.
Thank you.
Yeah, I think that's pro.
But how long did you go without food and water?
That's the key thing here.
Well, it's not entirely without either.
It's just for a while without enough.
I don't know what the longest time period I've ever gone without food and water.
Four hours maybe?
Not long.
Being thirsty was the worst part by far.
I didn't give a fuck about food because your stomach shrinks and it accommodates for that.
But being dehydrated is the worst pain, is the worst misery a human can feel,
is being without liquids, water, and not being able to appease that.
I don't know that I've ever had a period of prolonged thirst, and that would absolutely devastate me.
I wouldn't be able to go along.
It just completely destroys your mind and brain.
How long do you think you could go without water?
Six hours.
I feel like I could go probably about 30.
30 hours?
Can he go 30 hours without water?
I drink very little water, typically.
Well, he wouldn't.
What actually is the limit?
How long can you survive without water?
I don't know.
It's not much longer than...
No, no.
For water, it's only like a day or two.
For food, you could go like weeks or something.
Are you saying just water?
We're talking water as being any drink, right?
Yeah, we're just saying like...
I think you'll die of thirst after like a day or two.
Yeah, Steve.
When you say no water, you mean any beverage.
Yeah.
You cannot go 30 hours without a beverage.
Yeah, you could.
We for sure did.
Three days.
Who did?
Wrestlers would.
Did you really?
So you can drink your piss.
I mean, we've definitely done 24.
You actually can't.
Or the blood from a bat.
I don't think Steven could go 30 hours without a bat. I don't think Steven could go
30 hours without a beverage.
The argument in the booth is that if you
eat food, then that technically
contains water. No, we're going to give you
the beverage. It's the beverage thing.
I don't think you can go 30 hours
without a beverage. I don't think you could. Me either.
Yeah, because if you just ate a lot of fruit,
you're getting a lot of water.
So I don't think it would be too bad.
I'd like to see him do it.
A headache?
You know, we're going to have to do this.
No, I mean, yeah, it wouldn't be too hard.
The Mongols used to drink their horse's blood in order to survive long treks through the desert.
Because there's water in that.
Do you think Steve and Shay can go 30 hours without drinking a beverage, any beverage?
No.
Sorry, boys.
You're good?
There's a way to hack it.
I mean, if I drink two, if I drink a bottle of water.
Your seat's empty.
Why'd you sit in that one?
I don't know.
Very reasonable.
Change it up a little bit.
I have a question.
Yeah.
Wait, so wait, what's this?
Steven thinks he can drink.
What is going on right now?
I asked how long you guys think you could go without drinking any water.
Yeah, you could go 30 hours.
Yeah, 30 hours is very doable.
But I don't think he could.
I don't think he would.
Yeah.
I drink like 16 to 20 ounces of water a day.
So you probably couldn't.
That's not a lot at all.
Wait, 16 to 20?
Yes.
Oh, that is very little.
One bottle of water.
Yeah, that's nothing.
Why do you drink so little water?
I'm a salt guy.
Do you drink anything else?
What?
No, that's salt guy.
That means you need a lot of water.
Yeah, that's the op.
I don't drink that much water unless I have to and I'm on like TB12.
But salt, having a lot of salt means you should drink more water. It necessitates water. It's like saying I don't drink a lot of salt means you're a drink.
It's water.
It's like saying I don't drink a lot of water because I eat a lot of pretzels.
I think he's right.
I think that's it.
That is exactly what it is.
Yeah.
What?
No, he's right.
I think he's right.
Yeah.
He's not about what?
My aunt doesn't drink water, period.
But she drinks beverages. Yeah.
Dead.
Yes.
She doesn't drink.
What is she sipping on like if
i called her now and said hey dd when's the last time you drank water she'd be like i have no clue
call her right now because i want to hear more that is true frank the tank doesn't really drink
water i think well i i remember him saying he hates the taste of water i'm fascinated by people
who don't drink water have different beverage i have. I have a question after Jerry calls Dee Dee.
Aunt Bebe.
Hello.
Dee Dee Love.
Yes, hi.
Hey, you're live on a show right now.
Real quick, Dee Dee.
When is the last time you drank water?
Oh, my God.
I can't even remember.
I don't, months, months.
What do you drink?
Iced tea.
Just straight iced tea all the time?
Yeah, I cannot, I don't drink water at all.
What about when you brush your teeth?
Do you brush it, do you gargle with iced tea after?
No, no, no.
I rinse out with water.
Okay.
I told you, she don't drink water.
Thank you, Dee Dee, love you.
Okay, love you.
That's crazy.
Crazy, she sounded hot.
She sounded like Charmaine from Sop That's crazy. Crazy. She sounded hot.
She sounded like Charmaine from Sopranos. Really hot.
Like, super hot.
Didi, love does not drink water.
I'm telling you.
There's no water.
Caffeine dehydrates you, too.
Yeah, would you?
Would you?
If you weren't?
Big cat.
Stop it.
Stop it.
She's pretty.
Very pretty.
Very pretty?
I knew it.
Yeah.
God damn. I don't know if my bitch, I don't know if I could be wifed up. Very pretty? I knew it. Yeah. God damn.
I don't know if my bitch,
I don't know if I could be wifed up,
I don't know,
without a water drink.
No water.
Told you.
Dude, she does not drink water at all.
I mean, drinking iced tea, though,
is not that far of a departure from water.
But no water.
Yeah, I would say it is.
That is, yeah.
There's caffeine in the tea,
which dehydrates you further.
I guess.
I love water.
So what do you drink other than water?
Is that all you drink all day?
I drink water and alcohol and coffee.
Soda.
I'm pretty much the same.
I don't.
I'll sometimes do Diet Coke.
No juice.
No milk.
I drink water and tea.
That's all I drink.
So I had a question um
brandon yes hi uh christmas is coming up it is there's gonna be some gifts under the tree for
your kids yes it will there be a specific gift that says from uncle Big Cat or will it be from Santa? Oh, did Big Cat get a gift?
Uncle Big Cat might have gotten Tommy and the boys a gift.
And the boys?
And the boys.
And the girls.
What was the gift?
One of the big gifts from Santa Claus this year will have come from your house.
Uncle Big Cat?
Yes.
So will I be getting credit for that or no?
Santa is probably getting the credit.
Would you like the credit?
Actually, I don't really need the credit.
Does your wife know that Uncle Big Cat got it, or does she think also Santa got it?
No, she will know that Uncle Big Cat got it.
Okay.
She doesn't know now.
It's the Oculus that I bought that I never once opened.
Oh, the one you had, yeah.
When Brandon texted me, I was like, of course, because I literally have never.
I bought it six months ago.
I've not used it once.
It's the best possible scenario to have it go to someone who actually wants it.
They'll love that.
Tommy will absolutely go crazy.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I just didn't know if it was, you know.
But I did offer to pay you for it also.
No, but I don't want money.
Okay, all right.
But yeah, I just wanted, you know, I wanted maybe a video of tommy like knocking shit over on christmas day with the so i do have a balance in my house of those who
still think santa's coming and those who think it's just uncle big cat that think it's it's it's
that daddy being santa claus so i will tell tommy on the morning of i'll pull him aside hey like
listen keep this between us this came came from Big Cat. Yeah.
And you'll get your video.
Okay, that's all I want is a video.
I just want a video of him happy, like preferably causing maximum damage,
maybe in your man cave where he's got the Oculus on and he's just smashing shit. What's an Oculus?
What is that?
The 3D.
Oh, the virtual reality thing.
Maybe set up some glasses around so we can get some.
That's dangerous to him.
Yeah, I know.
We know.
But I want my satisfaction.
Tommy's down bad.
I almost called in sick today.
I almost took him to the ER this morning.
He's got the flu, and he's being watched right now.
My wife's over top of him, but there was a moment.
Him and Nick just got the straight-up flu.
Bad flu.
No COVID,cessive gene.
Well, the flu's kind of being like, you know, I've been
disrespected the last two years. Flu's back.
Flu's like, yo, you all forgot about me.
I'm here. Statement
came. It's way worse than that.
There's Marty going to the bar.
Marty going to drink. He's walking to his desk.
Marty, you gonna get a drink?
You gonna get a beer?
Fucking alcoholic. Denial. Yep. Marty going to drink. He's walking to his desk. You going to get a drink? You going to get a beer? Yeah.
Fucking alcoholic.
Yep.
Denial.
You have a kid too, Jerry, right?
Yeah, I got a two and a half month old.
Actually, I'm sorry.
Three months old tomorrow.
You really don't have to worry about that.
Yeah.
Forgiven.
Do you even have to buy two and a half month old gifts?
I did.
Yeah.
You know, I did.
You know, I wanted to get him a little Kia Telluride truck.
You ever see?
But he's three months.
My girlfriend said no.
I was going to say, it's not.
It's a little old.
Yeah, it's too much, you know.
But, yeah, just clothes and stuff.
I appreciate that.
I don't think he'll know, but whatever.
Good man.
I don't know what else to do.
He won't know until he's about three.
Next Christmas, he will be much more enamored with the wrapping paper and the boxes.
Yeah.
About three is when he'll really know.
I don't even know if three.
Not three?
Yeah.
Memories.
Memories is not until like four, but I'm saying at three, they at least know that it's a special
day and they're going to get gifts.
Whereas next year, when you buy him gifts, Jerry, he's just going to play in the boxes.
My problem is I can already tell that I'm the type of parent that I like when my kids, and my daughter's too young, but I like when my son gets things and makes them happy, so it's just continuous gifts.
Right.
I just buy stuff off Amazon.
It's like, here's more cars.
Because he fucking goes crazy for it. It's like, here's more cars. Because he fucking goes crazy for it.
It's like, why wouldn't I give myself this experience?
What's the duration of that thrill?
It's usually about a couple days.
A new toy?
Oh, yeah.
Really?
He sways a couple days out of that?
Oh, yeah.
He loves it.
I got him this big Mack truck, and he fucking loves it.
I'm picturing your grand, magnificent home filled to the brim with
endless amounts of toys.
Everything I just said is really just for
little cars.
Yeah, oh yeah. Cars, dude.
Cars all day, every day.
If you got him a really crappy gift, you would probably
appreciate it just as much as
something nice.
Yeah, but the cars, man.
If you got him a mop, I'm sure he'd be pumped.
What's his hall of fame? What's his Mount Rushmore of toys but the cars, man. If you got him like a mop, I'm sure he'd be pumped. He's got all the cars. What's his Hall of Fame?
What's his Mount Rushmore
of toys over the years?
Cars.
Just all four different cars?
Yeah.
Does he have a favorite car?
Is it Lightning McQueen?
Is it Mater?
He's been on a Jackson Storm guy.
I heard he likes trains.
He's a Jackson Storm guy?
He's not a train guy?
Oh, he likes trains too,
but not as much.
I know what you're trying to do.
He gives eye contact.
I'm not trying to do that.
I just saw that
For his school
There's a daycare assignment
Oh yeah the trains
Yes
That was one of those ones
That was like
Dude you fucking
All you talk about is cars
And then you go to school
And you say trains
That's what he was thankful for
When you put someone on the spot
It's hard to come up with
What's the one on here
We never play with trains
They used to have those
Hess trucks
Oh yeah the Hess trucks
They still have it Yeah Yeah every year Those are cool I used to get those That trucks. Oh, yeah, the Hess trucks. They still have it.
Yeah?
Yeah, every year.
Those are cool.
I used to get those.
That's only a thing up here.
When I got here, everybody asked me if I was going to get my kids the Hess truck.
I had no idea what they were talking about.
That's just a truck.
Yeah.
But it's nice, white and green.
I'm running through a problem with my wife right now in that I'm ordering gifts to come home,
and I need them to be put away and she's
just the first couple
she just has given to the boy.
Given to the kid. Yeah because
it's hard. Because it's fun.
So she gets the gift. I order it.
I'm going to hide it for Christmas. She gives it to
him and it's her giving it to him. What?
Now he has the memory of her giving
her gifts. So you're ordering these gifts
for Christmas and your wife is just retrieving a gift to a child.
She's awesome.
She's stealing the glory, and she doesn't have to go through the act of hiding it.
That's why I now have everything being sent to my office.
So if you see my desk, it's covered in, did I say my office?
You did say your office.
The office.
So I have a feeling that the Oculus was maybe going to be slipped in as a Santa gift to even your wife.
No, it wasn't going to be slipped in as a Santa gift to my wife.
I would tell her where I got it.
I haven't told her yet because there was no reason to tell her.
It hasn't gotten home.
Interesting.
Would you like me to tell her right now?
No, it's okay.
Text her.
Maybe call Dee Dee again.
Say what up.
Say what up to Dee Dee.
I just sent Zahn and TJ a picture.
This is my house all the time.
What else?
I have more questions for her.
No water.
Yeah.
Just iced tea?
Yep.
I love iced tea.
It's weird to then, like, yeah.
And she doesn't taste the taste, right?
I would assume she doesn't go to, I think you can be a no-water person, but you probably can't be a regular exerciser.
Oh, no, she don't exercise.
Right.
I would imagine going to the gym
if you're doing strenuous workout,
and you're like,
all right, now I'm just going to guzzle my iced tea.
This is my house.
This is just it all the time.
Or it's also a basketball goal.
Yeah, there's a cooler that we had out.
Those that are in a perfect line, color-coded.
Yep.
I came down and it was all set up like that.
All right, yeah, perfectly linear.
I like it, yeah.
Doubles of a lot of them because I found out for $15 you can just get a backup pair in case you lose one.
What does that outdoor...
What do you mean you found that out?
Of course you could just get
No I just realized
We lost one once
And it was a fucking meltdown
I was like alright
Is he an outdoor kid
Or an indoor kid
A little bit of both
What's his favorite outdoor thing
You take him to the park
Trains
What trains
No I'm just kidding
I was gonna say
Does he like to watch the boats
Is he a climber
Is he a jumper and a climber
The boats and construction sites
Watching the boats
Construction sites Like coming by my jobs Yeah no Is he a climber? Is he a jumper and a climber? The boats and construction sites. Watching the boats.
Construction sites.
He's like coming by my jobs.
Yeah, no, there actually was, it was funny yesterday.
We were walking to school because I walked to school with him every day.
And there was a big digger that was dropping dirt in there.
And we stopped to watch it.
And then on the other side of the construction site, the guy's like,
Big Cat, the fucking bears stink.
And I was like, yeah, we're just trying to watch this, dude.
A very funny moment.
So, yeah.
A daycare on a construction site.
That would be.
Yeah.
That works out.
Incredible.
Blue collar.
Blue collar preschool.
Yeah.
Utopia.
I would love that.
That would be cool.
Make sure your kid doesn't end up a pussy.
Donnie, what's your schedule?
I'm heading back to Italy on Thursday.
How awesome is Italy?
It's pretty cool. I haven't had a lot of time to explore, but Venice is absurd.
It's just living in one of the only cities that has zero cars.
What is...
Does Venice smell?
Oh, great question. It doesn't smell too bad but apparently like five times a year it floods and just i'll be walking around
with water up to my waist yeah how does it so everyone has you're walking around with water
up to your waist it hasn't yet but my landlord when i was renting the apartment he goes you're
gonna want to buy some boots and i'm talking, fisherman boots, the ones that go up to your waist because five times a year.
People are just willingly walking in water up to their groin?
So does anyone have computers?
I have no idea how that works.
Apparently, people just go about their daily lives.
But then, like, what about all the fancy stores on the first floors?
Do people just keep everything, like, off the floor in their apartments? Yeah, apartments yeah thankfully i'm on the second floor so i don't have to worry about
that i haven't been there for a flood but yeah i mean venice is sinking any advice steven
yeah i mean those boots will come in handy but if things are in sitting water for like
over a day it's ruined look at that yeah actually search on youtube like a venice
flood there's they try to look for the drain i know there's like a clip of everyone just like
they don't have a guy like that in italy they need one guy they need to send that guy
so the whole city is just i i it kind of blows my mind i don't really can i see an aerial shot
of venice there's cars.
No, that's not Venice then.
That looks like shit.
No, that's...
Yeah, that's...
Can I see an aerial shot of Venice?
I want to just kind of understand what we're working with here.
Yeah, I can show you exactly where...
Yeah, I want to see where you live.
Something I've come to find out is my town Cranford is called the Venice of New Jersey.
And this is the place that you bought and we're like,
it's never going to flood.
I hate the way you said that.
What the fuck you said?
Yeah.
So this is where you're like,
don't worry.
It will never flood.
Like it's a wall.
I mean,
that's,
there are chances we're theoretically low.
Okay.
Wait,
can you give us,
can you show us an aerial picture?
I like to see aerial pictures of a city.
Yeah.
I understand it. I love maps. Oh, that's Venice. Oh, dear. Can you show us an aerial picture? I like to see aerial pictures of a city. Yeah, I understand it.
I love maps.
Oh, that's Venice?
Oh, dear.
Holy shit.
So that really is.
It's way more dense than I imagined.
Holy fuck.
That's crazy.
So that's my apartment.
It looks like Cape Coral, Florida.
Where's your apartment?
Let's go.
Oh, wow.
We're going to get to the-
You can direct me.
You see my mouse?
Yeah. Oh, it's a nice going to get to the... You can direct me. You see my mouse? Yeah.
Oh, okay.
It's a nice area.
Yeah.
Here.
Now, it's streets, obviously.
It's just...
Or is there water that goes in between?
Yeah, I think there's water that goes in between streets.
Can you zoom in?
Yeah, wait.
I want to see the canals.
Yeah.
I want to see the maps, maybe.
Now I'm confused.
Is there...
So there's one main...
You can walk.
There's one main feeder canal and there's other
oh it's really out there yeah they just put too much too many houses on this fucking island and
now they're like why is it sinking um well no it's just that it's like it's crisscrossed with
millions of not like thousands of canals um Oh, also, I had a great idea.
If New Orleans starts to flood, they should just turn that into the Venice of the South.
Ooh.
You mean the Cranford of the South?
I don't think that would work.
Yeah.
The Cranford, New Jersey of the South.
I think it'd be nice.
It'd be like a more blue-collar Venice.
It'd be a lot of deaths.
Not enough Southerners know how to swim.
Steven, you take the train in?
You have all the boats?
I do.
Yeah, because you've got the train right in town, right?
Yep.
Yeah.
Occasions Venice would be sweet.
Good question there, Jerry.
You have those little swamp boats cruising through the canals.
That's very clear water.
Yeah, it looks nice.
Is it a one-way?
One stop?
No stop?
He's just asking his commute.
I'm trying.
No, I'm trying to get it.
I'm having a hard time finding a house there.
I mean, everything is so expensive.
I keep trying.
You're right.
It stinks.
Is it a straight shot or no?
I got to transfer to Newark Penn.
Always?
Yes.
Unless it's like off hours or I'm going to my kids.
Oh, by the way, Alex said that maybe tomorrow we'll do it.
She said that Kim is making more cookies. Oh, that the way, Alex said that maybe tomorrow we'll do it. She said that Kim is making more cookies.
Oh, that'd be great.
I don't think that she realizes that whatever she makes, I'm going to rank them really low.
Yeah, they're going to.
It's kind of a bit I got going on.
I like that.
I don't like it.
Yeah.
Jerry said I was a bad guy.
Were they really bad?
I think it's more like.
It is kind of.
Do you wonder, is the bit worth it if you're just going to.
I didn't really like them.
Yeah.
Kim went in the garbage
they were like dry
and pecan
pecan
it wasn't dry
I don't know
she done good
what would you rate them Jerry
I did a 9.7
oh that's a little high
but I'm
no no no no
no no no
no one will ever
take you seriously
listen to me
you're patronizing
no I'm not
listen to me
fans every year
send me those cookies
all the time
every year
how long have you had a fan base I've had fans before Barstool. Fans every year send me those cookies. Every year? Every year.
How long have you had a fan base?
I've had fans before Barstool.
Yeah, but every year.
At the heat contest.
I'd say, okay, the last probably three years.
You've had fans for three years.
The last three years, fans always send me.
Those are one of the best ones I've had.
The only knock I have on them, why they weren't a 9.9 or a 10,
was because Kim didn't put powdered sugar on them.
If there is a knock on the cookie, it can't be a 9.7.
Oh, good point.
Why?
Agreed.
9.7 is almost perfect.
I think 9.7 is perfect too.
I had a 9.9 today.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
Yeah, you did.
It was delicious.
Fuck.
It was fucking good.
My mom's making brownies next week.
Oh, I will rate those.
Oh, yeah.
Bring them on. If you rate them bad, it'll break her next week. Oh, I'll rate those. Bring them on.
If you rate them bad, it'll break her heart forever.
Does she know what she's doing?
Yeah, TJ, you know me pretty well.
That was stupid.
It'll crush her.
I'm going to rank them two, and I'm going to eat the whole fucking thing.
Maybe just be honest with one person.
I was.
It was Stefan.
He had 9.9 cookies.
Oh, Stefan can cook a fucking cookie.
Yeah, he was really good.
That motherfucker came back.
They were really good cookies.
Yeah, he can.
You had Stefan's cookies?
Yeah, they're good.
Yeah.
Did you watch Succession, KB?
No.
Oh.
I saw the comparison.
Didn't understand it, but it seemed cool.
Yeah, the No Context Yak guy tweeted out a pretty good comparison.
I also think, who are you?
You tell me.
I can't remember.
Oh, you were Roman, which actually makes even more sense.
Because Roman's a sexual pervert.
He's a pervert.
But also, Donnie, wouldn't you agree KB is more even Roman in that he's a very kind-hearted person deep down, but he can't never have, like, a real heartfelt conversation.
It's always going to lead to a joke.
He's incapable of, like, a real relationship.
But I love him.
He's a fucking television star.
Yeah, that's true.
And he's a Culkin.
And he's fictional.
All right, so there it is.
He's very
quick-witted yeah yeah what did you think about this donnie all right let's i don't know this
so you're the you're the so brandon's nailed they nailed brandon so who is kendall roy who's just
trying who's who's like uh power hungry yeah ultimately very dumb yeah yeah but perfect
trying on the nose constantly take over the company.
Yeah.
Yeah.
He tries hard, but usually ends up depressed.
Caleb is Connor's is pretty good.
Yes.
I don't know why Steven is Shiv, but I guess it kind of makes sense.
Kind of always out of the loop.
Yeah.
I guess that would make sense.
I love that picture of Owen.
It kind of falls apart after the left hand side is really, really strong.
Everything else is kind of flimsy.
And then we made Roan Stewie, which I thought made sense as well.
I mean, it's going to be crazy when Dave gets up there in age.
We might have a lot of Succession-esque theatrics going on around this company.
Imagine if we ever became like a $300 billion company.
Yeah, and Dave's like, hey, listen, I'm going to retire for good.
I want to hand over the reins.
Yeah.
It would get pretty heated.
It would.
I mean, I think you would probably have the reins if you wanted them.
But if we're talking like 30 years from now, I wouldn't.
Yeah.
I wouldn't want any of that.
I wouldn't want it now.
Yeah, because I don't know.
Heavy lies the, What is it?
Heavy lies the crown.
Where's the crown? I could not do Dave's shop.
Brandon could.
I love that when
Greg the Egg ran into Dave during
a Peach review, and he's actually a huge fan of
Barstool. So you guys can maybe
have him swing in for the Yak someday.
Ooh. That'd be cool. I'm swing in for the yak someday? Ooh.
That'd be cool.
I'm sure that would mean a lot to him.
Can we retweet TJ's Rutgers tweet?
I already retweeted it twice.
Is it going to get there?
I was told I was going to get fired if I did.
So there's the confusion. There's the original tweet.
Right.
Yeah.
And that one has to get.
Who said you're going to get fired?
The 5,000 tweets.
Dave did.
He sent out an email.
Yeah.
But everyone's retweeting the quote tweets, which technically don't count. the 5,000. Dave did send out an email. Yeah.
But everyone's retweeting the quote tweets,
which technically don't count.
Oh, I did both.
So what are we at?
I can't read that.
3.5.
3.16.
Good luck, TJ.
I've done all I can.
When is Wisconsin playing?
Probably January.
Okay.
Well, maybe we'll go. Actually, I'm just kidding I'm not gonna go
that would be nice
that's so far away
I don't like that I don't like you need a certain
amount of retweets to get this
why don't you just talk to a man to man
Rutgers your account like do you want
me to have these season tickets or not
do you think it will be beneficial to you or not we should all just be like hey listen ruckers basketball i am a huge
fan there how many people can you say that about yeah yeah less than 50 right less than 50 right
so james gandolfini's dead james gandolfini's dead. James Gandolfini is dead.
That's so there's got to at least be one pair of season tickets.
They probably have like four or five seats.
Yeah.
Ray Rice.
Haven't seen him in a long time.
He's probably.
I don't know if Kenny Brick can afford that.
Brian Leonard.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So what what are we talking about here?
He seems like it should be wide open.
Seems like it should be wide open.
Plus, Frank's a Seton Hall guy.
Frank's, yeah, that's a power vacuum that's been created in the state of Jersey.
What is the retweet?
That's arbitrary.
I'm going to DM them right now.
Tell them to pump it up?
No, just say, hey, just give them the tickets or not.
What do you want to do?
Yeah, shit or get off the pot. You tickets or not. What do you want to do? Yeah, shit or get off the pot.
You as an adult, what do you want to do?
Do you want him to have the season tickets or not?
February 26, Wisconsin comes to Rutgers.
That's February 26.
Rutgers needs you more than you need Rutgers.
Would you agree with that?
That's probably not true.
Okay.
He made them go viral.
How often does that happen?
Two million views on that.
I rounded up.
Is that okay?
You rounded up 700,000 views?
Sometimes I'm addicted to the roundup game.
I'm going to retweet it for you, TJ.
I don't care about the job anymore.
Wait, were you going to get fired?
I get fired.
I don't care.
What?
Jerry.
Dave apparently hates TJ. Wait, were you going to get fired? I'd get fired. I don't care. What? Jerry. Dave apparently hates TJ.
Yeah, but Dave retweeted it for him.
Yeah.
And everyone's like, oh, well, you just helped him.
Like, I love the internet.
Is it at 28 right now?
How good a head do you think Nancy Reagan really gave?
Probably pretty good.
I mean, she landed a governor that would become president.
And he was an actor at the time.
Yeah, she landed a Hollywood actor.
That was a story, like, unfortunately, we will never know.
But I'd love to know, like, just how good was this head that she gave?
It had to be great.
A lot of ball play?
I always wondered that.
Nancy Reagan?
No.
Before now?
As you get old.
I'm maybe a little past my prime a little bit, but as you get older, do you still get head?
I think you actually get more head.
Are you only thinking of old Nancy Reagan because it was young Nancy Reagan that gave the head?
I'm forgetting about the whole Nancy Reagan thing.
I'm just saying in your late 30s and 40s.
What?
Like, yeah.
God damn, I hope so.
I hope so.
Well, I think there's probably a point where it comes back where it's like,
sex is too much work, so head is just easy.
Gotcha.
The villages down in Florida have a crazy sexually transmitted disease problem.
Yes.
I think a lot of nursing homes have that, right?
Speaking of.
Yeah.
The way they're giving head in nursing homes?
Yeah.
The Villages.
Remember, like.
The Villages wasn't a nursing home.
The Villages is a place where they go to live.
Yeah, that's just a retirement community.
But me and KB met a guy who's a gigolo.
Dennis Dixon, was it?
Or Dennis.
He played quarterback at Oregon.
His first name was Dennis.
I forget his last name.
Speaking of, I got something new.
The wild women, the wild women, the ripping in the town,
the ripping in the town, the ripping in the town.
Big cat, big cat, big cat.
This is Eagle Rick in Arizona.
Bob and Weave, Bob and Weave, Bob and Weave. Bob and Weave.
Bob and Weave.
Hey, man, sorry to miss a call last night, Nat, but talk to Brett, and possibly we'll be in North Carolina.
I don't know.
It entails off to something totally different.
And we're real close.
I don't know what he's even talking about.
Hedo Rick.
The guy who asked for it lives in North Carolina, but Hedo Rick gave me a shout out shout out that's awesome yeah big cat bob and weave yeah so the the he don't rick would send
him down to florida see that would be nice if we could like you know it's always like uh uh mj
versus lebron you'll never get to decide because they play different errors like let's get let's
get nancy reagan reanimated to suck off he off Hedo Rick and then properly judge these blowjobs.
Is Hedo Rick even a head guy?
I think he's an everything guy.
He probably doesn't come from head.
You're right.
If someone's just ripping and tearing and bobbing and weaving, I don't think they care about head.
Yeah, you're probably right.
It's probably a formality.
But what an honor to get head from Nancy Reagan.
Head is probably like the prayer before Thanksgiving for him.
He just can't wait.
He just wants to get in.
Yeah, right.
To get in.
In.
He don't.
Rick, what a legend.
Guy probably fucks for hours.
I don't know how much.
How many dicks have been sucked in the White House when I'm older?
Wait, what? Let's do two questions. Donnie, you go first. I don't know how much How many dicks have been sucked In the White House When I'm older Wait what
Let's do two questions
Donnie you go first
I was just saying like
Do you think
Most people just get
Less horny with age
Yes
By the time you're 70
You're just not even
Intrigued
Yeah
But there are
70 year olds who
Are still fucking
A lot
Yeah I think they were probably
Horny all their life
Who was the
Someone commented like i was
nick and kb are low t buzzfeed uh buzzfeed authors i mean the low t part kind of agreed with but
buzzfeed authors i mean i don't think you could one of our co-workers replied i think i have low
i feel like that was a shot at me. Kelly in Vegas, I think.
Said you have low T.
She said low T and then the less than symbol a bunch of times.
I don't think you have low T.
You don't have low T.
I have low T.
You can't have a squat record with low T.
I do have a squat.
Thank you for remembering.
That is 55.
Those two things can never go together. Anyone out there who's holding a squat record has an adequate, if not elevated, amount of T.
I think I go in cycles.
I'll have a week feeling a little low T, and then I'll have a week where I'm feeling pretty high T.
Yeah.
Just, yeah.
It is.
I mean, it's depending on working out.
If you work out, your T goes up.
Okay.
What were you going to say, Brandon?
How many blowjobs in the White House?
How many dicks have been sucked in the White House?
Well, I'd say the amount of presidents.
Wait, specific?
No.
I don't think there's any dicks.
You think Biden's getting his dick sucked in the White House?
Yes.
I think he's got his dick sucked, yeah.
Well, if he didn't do it this time, it would happen last time.
You think Taft was getting his dick sucked in the White House?
Yeah.
I don't know. For sure. But also, other guys get their dicks sucked in the White House? Yeah. I don't know.
For sure.
But also, other guys get their dicks sucked in the White House.
Well, certainly we know Bill Clinton did.
I would assume now Reagan did.
No, but I'm saying not even just presidents.
Stafford, low-level Stafford.
Like fucking JFK.
All his boys got their dicks sucked in the White House.
That's probably true, yeah.
How many presidents were there?
Was it 50-something?
No, we're at 46.
We're at 46.
46.
How do you forget that when you have a tattoo of 45 on you?
45?
Where's my 45 tattoo?
No, the president who was 45.
So what else?
What?
Trump.
You have Trump tattoos.
What are you saying?
I don't have a Trump tattoo.
Why are you trying to stir the pot?
I'm kidding.
It's not the time to get political.
Will you let me know what it is?
Sure. I'm not, this, it's not the time to get political. Will you let me know what it is? Sure, I mean, I'm not saying who I voted for.
It was funny, I was asking Jerry about, like,
what guys talk about on the construction site, and...
What?
No, go ahead.
No, this is fine, this is fine.
I don't care.
It's fine.
I actually think that, like, people disagreeing,
the worst thing that happens on Twitter when people –
like, how do you follow this fool who has an extreme thought left or right?
I'm like, I don't know because I want to see what other people are saying.
I want to see what an extreme person is saying.
I'm not saying I agree with them.
But he was like – I was like, do you guys talk about politics?
He's like, never talk about politics.
But we all pretty much agree on everything politically.
So it's like, this is not even a big deal.
That's part of the game.
You guys are all welfare for all kind of guys.
Socialism.
Nah.
Bernie.
I wouldn't say that.
Just some Bernie bros doing work together.
Nah, we comrades.
Yeah.
We voted for Trump.
Do what you gotta do.
Hey, that's...
I don't give a fuck.
Yeah, that's fine.
Like, everybody has their own...
All right, let's switch.
What about Dee Dee?
No, I'm not calling Dee Dee again.
Well, why don't you?
Let's find a reason to call her.
Yeah.
There's no reason.
What about... She's gotta have reason Yeah There's no reason What about
She's gotta have
What else about her
What's her other
What's her defining
Characteristic
She doesn't drink water
What else
She don't drink water
She goes to bed
I'd say about 730
Oh my god
Call her up
And prove that
730
Yeah call her up
She's growth
She's the first one
At ShopRite
Every single week
Does she smoke
Wait what time Early I think 6 o'clock Monday It is so awesome To shop at ShopRite every single week. Does she smoke? Wait, what time?
Early.
I think 6 o'clock.
Monday?
It is so awesome to shop at ShopRite at 6 a.m.
Wait, every day she goes?
No, I think she goes on Saturdays, 6 o'clock.
That's actually an awesome move.
It is fantastic.
There's nothing better than, we've often talked about stolen time.
Like when you do things.
Yeah.
Oh, she vacuums.
That's normal.
No way. Call her, Rob. Prove that. do things yeah oh she vacuums every like that's normal no way call it rob prove that there's
nothing better than stolen time where it's like if you're if you're drunk like like the cubs when
they play 220 on fridays you get drunk and then you leave the stadium and everyone's getting off
the train from work and you're like i've been drunk for hours going to shop right at 6 a.m on
a saturday while everyone's sleeping.
It's like, I've just stolen this time.
It's free time.
She's very, very structured.
Very.
Is she a good cook?
She's a good cook.
Yeah, she's a good cook.
She sounds like a great gal.
Would you let her see your grandmother's cookbook?
No.
Is that her mom?
That's her mom, too.
Oh, wow.
That's my mom's sister.
So you never would?
Yeah, no, they look identical. So your mom? That's the yak for too. Oh, wow. That's my mom's sister. So you never would? Yeah, no, they look identical.
So your mom?
That's the yak for me.
All right, see you guys.
For me.
Sheesh.
All right, young blood.
It's the yak. is is Thank you.