The Yak - Dude Fest 2024 is Gonna Change the World | The Yak 6-4-24

Episode Date: June 4, 2024

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Hello. It's the Yak. Roback.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off your first purchase. Q-zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, everything.
Starting point is 00:00:38 Roback.com. Promo code Yak. Our wonderful friends from Roback. And swim trunks. You say swim trunks? I say swim trunks. There was a phase where I said board shorts, but I went right back to swim trunks you say swim trunks I say swim trunks there was a phase where I said board shorts but I went right back to swim trunks suit swim suit board shorts were like the cool guy oh no wait I'm a bathing suit guy I don't think I'm a bathing suit guy mostly trunks sounds very old
Starting point is 00:00:58 trunks sounds like something like you'd see a Coney Island with a guy lifting like two of those I think that's a. I think that's a bathing suit. The one piece white and red striped. Yeah. That was before air conditioning. More things change, more they stay the same. And floors. Floors were.
Starting point is 00:01:16 Floors and floors right before floors. Floors were brand new and all the kids. Yeah. Brandon's in a meeting. He'll be here in a minute. KB is just late. Yep. Yep.
Starting point is 00:01:28 That's right. It surprises him sometimes. Sneaks up on you. Kyle's a specter. I don't know if he's... I might find out that he's been dead for like 20 years. Like that could be...
Starting point is 00:01:37 Because I don't see him out of the office. He might be a figment of our imagination. Could very well be. He does the right... Kyle does the perfect amount of like giving you the perfect amount of kyle it leaves you wanting more you always want more kyle but he showed up at pup punk at midnight as i was leaving right i was like whoa what a move yeah it's he's never oversaturated you're just always like you always find yourself being like man i wish kyle
Starting point is 00:02:01 was here he doesn't let you od on kyle and then if he shows up you're like damn this is awesome and then he's poof gone you're like man I wish I had more Kyle that's been my secret since 2012 yeah do you feel like if people got to know you you'd be less liked do you think there's a mystique about you that's that's just the case for every human but you you I was just saying before you got here you do a great job of giving us just enough Kyle that we always want a little more Kyle I've convinced myself that I can't have too much Kyle. Right. Oh, yeah. I could OD on Kyle and you wouldn't need to give me Narcan.
Starting point is 00:02:31 No. No. You'd have a great buzz. Even the worst human in the world, if they limited themselves to a degree, especially to my degree, you would crave them. Yeah. You would forget their flaws. Every time you're out, it's an event. At this point, yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:48 Turns into a show. Yeah. I got to talk about Mook today for a quick second. I'm so sorry. Why are you apologizing? I accept your apology. Thank you. Thank you, guys.
Starting point is 00:03:00 He walked into the ANA studio today. I was like, damn, you're fitted up. He's got the Pizza Hut socks, the Patagonia shorts, and then his American flag shirt. And he was like, yeah, dude, this American flag shirt's Calvin Klein. It's like designer. I'm like, no way. And he's like, no, no, no. It might be Tommy Hilfiger.
Starting point is 00:03:15 And I said, what's it say on the sleeve? Mark, what's it say on the sleeve? It says Sunoco. That's gas station brand. I thought it was Tommy. That's gas station brand. I thought it was Tommy. That's gas station brand. I was convinced. A vintage dealer sent me this in a pack.
Starting point is 00:03:29 It has to be Calvin and Sonoco. You said it was either Calvin or Tommy. It's not even one of the better gas stations. If he was wearing a BP, I wouldn't clown him. Is it a Calvin Sonoco club? That's what I thought. He could have went Speedway. No, no, check the tag.
Starting point is 00:03:41 It's a half BP. Texaco. Yeah. Oh, Sonoco's last rung. no, check the tag. It's a head, Beefy. Texaco. Yeah. Oh, Sunoco's last rung. Yeah, so you're- DJ, pull it up. Your good shirt's a Sunoco. This is one of my better shirts.
Starting point is 00:03:51 Yeah. Yeah. And you thought it was Calvin. The man confused Calvin with Sunoco. I can't believe it actually says Beefy Haynes. It's a Beefy T, yeah. It is thick. What is that shirt?
Starting point is 00:04:03 That shirt is a disgrace. What's the star? What is on the star portion? That's bad. An exclamation point. What's the exclamation point? Yeah, what is that? We got to get to the bottom of what the shirt means.
Starting point is 00:04:14 We're excited about America. Philadelphia, July 4th, 1999. It says, Sunoco, welcome America. Was that a special? What year was that? That wasn't the bicentennial. 23 years after? The bicentennial that would be three years after bicentennial must have rocked i don't know sonoco is designer for me though this is yeah this is
Starting point is 00:04:31 like my best fit i've got off in a while when brandon gets here we should ask him about the bison yeah i feel like they really blew it out for that what what was that it was 200 years 200 years of america you think that was like special? Oh, yeah. There was a special nickel, right? Yeah, 1976. Oh, fuck, dude. Are we not going to make the tri-centennial now? I don't think we're going to make it. Or the bicentennial?
Starting point is 00:04:51 Don't say that. We were born in the wrong time. We get no centennials? We get none. Wait, why don't we have our own? What was happening during the bicentennial? Like a non-stop festival? Yeah, I think so.
Starting point is 00:05:00 Philadelphia, because that's where it all went down, is like every Fourth of July already it's going crazy. So I imagine the bicentennial was. You think Philadelphia celebrates Fourth of July better than anyone else? Oh, yeah. I would say yes. There's a huge. Wawa. That was the first one.
Starting point is 00:05:16 I'm out. And I'm out. No. My dad and I used to go every year. We'd make a big pot of chip beef. Oh, yeah. Mom and dad were hammered in the front yard letting us do whatever we wanted. Tell me about Philadelphia's Fourth of July.
Starting point is 00:05:33 The Wawa. Well, they give out free hoagies on Independence Mall. And all Philadelphia, my dad and I, every year we used to go and wait in the line. And you get your free hoagie. Then you walk around Independence Mall. And there's great fireworks and huge street parties and ben franklin's walking around hanging out with everybody that's pretty cool full of the most people who have to shit oh big time that's facts yeah everyone's got a fucking low yeah developing that's the
Starting point is 00:05:57 shit right now i mean every person's always brewing a turd yeah not. Not like Philadelphia. But Philly, it's like always, it's a monster. What city has the most guys that just need to shit? Buffalo? Buffalo seems like Buffalo. So no, we can't go heroin territory.
Starting point is 00:06:13 Can't go heroin. And you can't go like Milwaukee because cheese constipates you. The heroin might get knocked on Philly. What about like Seattle? The IPAs, the coffee?
Starting point is 00:06:21 Oh, coffee. That's a good out of the box. Oh, that's a good call. Oh, that's poop, the coffee. Oh, coffee. That's a good out-of-the-box opinion. That's a good call. Oh, that's poop or crap. TJ, do they have the tier of gas stations or no? I bet you demote. Yes, all right, let's go. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:06:37 Oh, boy. Oh, Shell is up there. Shell is S tier. Oh, here goes TJ going rogue always. Always. Loves, loves, loves. First of all, Bucky's is S tier. Oh, here goes TJ going rogue always. Always. Loves. Loves. Loves. First of all, Bucky's is too big.
Starting point is 00:06:49 It's not a good gas station. It's a bad superstore. Let's put 7-Eleven on F. No. Whoa. You're so off. F-Sev. 7-Eleven has gas?
Starting point is 00:06:58 7-Eleven is the best. Listen, we can talk all we want. TJ's gone rogue. He's gone. And he's not coming back. Oh, Costco's got to be S. Costco? I wouldn't consider that a gas station. They have want. TJ's gone rogue. He's gone. And he's not coming back. Oh, Costco's got to be S. Costco? I wouldn't consider that a gas station.
Starting point is 00:07:08 They have gas. It's cheaper gas. If you have a membership. But there's no... I'm talking about like a traditional mart. You can't go into the mart. There's no mart. Where's my boys at Quick Trip?
Starting point is 00:07:16 The whole Costco's the mart. Quick Trip is number one S tier. If we're talking... What other gas station can you buy a TV at? TJ, put... Costco. Put Loves on S. No, Loves seems like where truckers will fuck.
Starting point is 00:07:28 That's exactly why it's S. Yeah, same with Pilot. No, but without you asking them to. Well, that's come and go. Do they have a tier for everything? Yeah, I think so. Speedway's great. Wait, TJ, can you scroll down?
Starting point is 00:07:41 Let's just do a real pro gas show and all S. Sitco. Oh, Sitco. Sitco. What are you talking about? Sit's do a real pro gas show and all S. Sitco. Oh, Sitco. Sitco. What are you talking about? Sitco. We're talking about Sitco, dude. That's where I bought my first pack of cigarettes.
Starting point is 00:07:51 Does that say Terrible's? I like Sinclair's logo. They're just like, yeah, ha ha. It's dinosaur fuel, like fossil. That is cool. Yeah. B, B, C, C, obviously. Sitco goes a long way.
Starting point is 00:08:02 Is that the sign outside of Wrigley? Or not Wrigley Fenway? Yeah. Is that the famous sign? Okayrigley? Or not Wrigley Fenway? Yes. Sheetz is an A. S. No, Wawa's better than Sheetz. Oh boy. Thank you. Big Cat, I was a big fan of the show, but today
Starting point is 00:08:16 I'm unsubscribing. I've tried both, and it's a fact. And Sheetz's coffee area is complete. Hey, you don't get to talk about palate. That's fact. That is fair. A lot of people really kill themselves. The only conversation you could coffee area is hey you don't get to talk about palate that's fast that is fair a lot of people really kill themselves
Starting point is 00:08:28 the only conversation you could have on this is which gasoline tastes the best okay wait why don't we pitch that to Clemmer for his show
Starting point is 00:08:35 he goes around the country tasting the best gas what was the gas station the guy stuck the thing up his ass oh that was in Italy oh that was in Italy I wish that was in Jersey
Starting point is 00:08:44 so someone would have to pump it for him that'll be amazing oh that was uh i love arguing yeah that's the best by the way i wanted to say thank you to uh the yakkers one because i don't know the final vote but i assume that i won you had to uh captain of the year which we will talk about the case race and the planning two uh our numbers are insane every now and then i need to like look back and be like holy shit this i was looking someone sent me a clip from like a show we did like two and a half years ago and it was like 30 000 people watched the whole show oh wow now we're like every time like 90 100 that feels good shout out you guys are the best feels like we're in a good iteration.
Starting point is 00:09:25 And I think we're going to get a case race. Yeah. Royal Rumble, which we should plan anyway because I think we're just going to do it no matter what. So the last time Kate drank on the show, you had a baby in you.
Starting point is 00:09:35 Yes. Yeah. I didn't feel anything. It is about that time. He was hammered. Yeah, he was done. It's about that time. But I've been dipping my toe in the pond.
Starting point is 00:09:45 Are you going to have a third? No, I got my tubes out. Oh, okay. Done. It's about that time. But I've been dipping my toe in the pond. Are you going to have a third? No, I got my tubes out. Oh, okay. Done, done. Smart, smart. Pat can. He can. Will this case race be three teams, 100 each?
Starting point is 00:09:54 No, I think it's going to be. Well, let's talk it out. So the Royal Rumble, we were chatting on it on the group text last night. There's a couple different ways we can do it but i think the one way that i'll throw out first we can just walk through it is the royal rumble is each team ends up with eight on a side right and it's so there's a wheel with all the regular cast so we start literally there's no one in here. It's just like Connor Griffin is the announcer. You wheel, and it's like, oh, it's random. It's like, all right, come on down, KB.
Starting point is 00:10:29 Come on down, Nick. So now it's Nick versus KB, one-on-one. Yep. And every 10 minutes, we add someone from the regular cast. And then once we're done, you know, the whole room is full, we start adding the mystery guests. Yes. Four and four on each side.
Starting point is 00:10:43 Amazing. And then I think after the last guest is added it's like 20 minutes from that point and whichever team has the most beers done so there's not an amount that we have to do i like yeah so it's like oh you're always kind of still in it i was like if the last guest is like dana beers and he hasn't had a single beer and he could just start fucking ripping them oh that'd be incredible so it evens out in the end there it is people in the beginning aren't super fucked because there are people in the end.
Starting point is 00:11:06 And it's also completely random. So it's like one side could add Spider and the other side adds Will and you're like, what the fuck? I love the Dana Beers visual because that happens in every Royal Rumbles. A guy comes sprinting down the ramp and he's fucking throwing everybody over real quick.
Starting point is 00:11:20 Now, the only question that we were throwing around too is do we then do... So say it's eight versus eight. quick now the only question that we were throwing around too is do we then do so everyone so say it's eight verse eight do we then do a reverse wheel to eliminate someone every five minutes from each team so that it goes back to 1v1 but do they stay in the room to get them on the road oh yeah they could stay in the room too but they can't drink okay then it ends up 1v1 that's amazing yeah i think that would be let's do it. I think they should leave the room. Oh, I was going to say just for the visuals.
Starting point is 00:11:48 Everybody around Dana cheering him on. Maybe at the end. Like a semi-circle around your guy. Dana's kind of the focal point of all. Maybe they stay in the room but they don't sit in the chairs so that we get the visual. Yes. Just two people sitting.
Starting point is 00:12:03 Mono-y mono, everything behind. Yeah, if it was you two, and he has a whole flank of people over there. Drink you pussy! Fuck the drink you! Oh, this would be great. That would be awesome. It's going to be easy to edit, right?
Starting point is 00:12:14 16 drunk people in a row? Oh, yeah. TJ? As long as we don't invite any homophobes or racists. Oh, that's Quigs. Yeah, Quigs. Have fun, Quigs. This is going to be the hardest thing in the world
Starting point is 00:12:26 quigs could drop one 20 minute video and none of us would be employed yeah what's on the cutting room floor oh he has what he has now we have to destroy his hard drive yeah he could just do a barstool sports deleted scenes when he someday wants to get paid yep yep he could get a million dollars out of you today yeah no but quigs is the type of guy like i'd be like well played happy for you yeah you know what i mean yeah he doesn't have a mean bone in his body but he is vindictive and evil yeah does he also own your penis or is that just max and shane max and shane on my penis uh there was the one time we did the uh chili in the diapers for george brett and i forgot the gopro was in the
Starting point is 00:13:08 uh bathroom and i got completely naked and so i think hank has that okay just me standing naked in the bathroom he's got the full body yeah wow yeah so when will this case race be like this will be the week of Dozen. So we're going to film it like 19th evening? Yes, sometime around then, and then we'll air it. So it'll be either like the 18th or 19th, and then we'll air it that Friday. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:37 I'm excited. We haven't done a case race in a long ass time. How long has it been? January 2023. Did we not do one before we left last summer? Yeah, we did one, a farewell one. Wow, it's been a while. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:52 Really? And we're dressing up. Yeah, I think we're going to dress like wrestlers. Are we doing face paint again? If your wrestler has face paint. Yeah. Yeah. And we got to go no duplicates, so we got to actually get going on that.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Yeah. Costumes. Yeah. Noumes. Yeah. No dupes. This is exciting. My brain's still hung up on that we don't get a bicentennial or tricentennial. I know. What happened 200 years ago from next Friday?
Starting point is 00:14:16 Let's make our own bicentennial. Ooh. The Yak bicentennial. What year would that be? I suck at math. 1824. 1824. You guys follow the accounts
Starting point is 00:14:26 where they live tweet something from a long time ago? No, I think that's whack. Really? What is this concept? I follow account live tweeting World War II. I kind of love that. So they start over.
Starting point is 00:14:41 There's no funny business. It's all historically accurate. Yeah, right now they're in 1940. Oh, I would like that. So they'll be like, there's no funny business. It's all historically accurate. Yeah, it's like right now they're in 1940. Oh, I would like that. So they'll be like, this is what happened in 1940. You think it's whack-a-sin, Nick? I think it's whack-a-sin. But I don't want to poo-poo on something you like. Now I kind of want to dislike it too, but I like it.
Starting point is 00:14:58 All right. I like the idea. Was that 200 years ago? We're celebrating the death of a Spanish civil engineer. Shit, I'm out next Friday. Fuck, and I love that guy. Okay, what about Thursday? I'm out Wednesday, Thursday, Friday.
Starting point is 00:15:09 Remember, I'm going on vacation. Let's just see. Holy shit, yeah. What was 200 years ago? Straight up. Straight up. 20 or 19. 18.
Starting point is 00:15:19 Oh, boy. 1824. 1824, yeah. Any guesses? Like, what was going on in culture, sport, politics? What was going on in 1824? Take one guess. Victorian people?
Starting point is 00:15:33 But give me something more specific. Honest Wagner hit 271, I think. Yeah. Austria was always doing shit in like the 1800s. We still got like cowboys at that point. Yeah, yeah. Still have those now, brother. We still have them. Yeah, but like the 1800s. We still got like cowboys at that point. Yeah, yeah. Still have those now, brother. We still have them.
Starting point is 00:15:46 Yeah, but like OG cowboys. Oh, was that? No, was that like Manifest Destiny? Yeah, that was Manifest Destiny, right? We still have cowboys. You know what I mean.
Starting point is 00:15:56 Like grizzly ass cowboys. They'd go weeks without anything happening. Queen of Hawaii died of measles? What a pussy. It's 1820. What was going on in like... And then the king died of measles? What a pussy. What was going on in life? And then the king died of measles.
Starting point is 00:16:08 How soon after? Three days after. Wait, wait, wait. While accompanying her husband during his visit to the United Kingdom. Oh, well, yeah, that makes sense. What was the number one purchase of 1824? Probably like Louisiana. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:27 Yeah, what was the toy that you had to have? Was there a toy? What was the Tickle Me Elmo of 1824? A hoop with a stick? All of California. A spool. Should we do an 1824 gauntlet? Like all 1824 children's? Yeah, we should.
Starting point is 00:16:41 One of us is in. I don't think they had toys. I think they just had jobs. Jacks? They just had like a rock. Jacks suck. Yeah. You had a tree.
Starting point is 00:16:51 You had a rock. You had a tree. Marbles. Marbles? Dolls, whizzers, and buzz saws. A blind man's bluff. Ball and cup. Rocking horse.
Starting point is 00:17:00 Oh, ball and cup. Hobby horse. The kite was around. The toy drum. What's a different... Oh, never mind. The spinning top, of course. The toy gun in Bow and cup. Bobby horse. The kite was around. The toy drum. What's a different... Oh, never mind. The spinning top, of course. The toy gun in bow and arrow.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Ooh. Remember Barstool's ball and cup? Trent was in charge of the ball and cup. Yeah, yeah. You could only touch it once a day. That, I was so bad at that. People got really into that. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:20 Do we have that guy coming in or no? Oh, yeah. The king of pinball. The king of pinball is here. We got a pinball machine. Yes, we got a pinball machine. A Star Wars pinball machine. Do you want him guy coming in or no? Oh, yeah. The king of pinball. The king of pinball is here. We got a pinball machine. We got a pinball machine. A Star Wars pinball machine. Do you want him to come in?
Starting point is 00:17:30 I caught Connor Griffin jacking off to the princess Leia. Oh, he's got to be the best day of his life. Yeah. Connor was actually standing next to the pinball machine with his hands on his hips for like 10 minutes. Just asking a bunch of questions. Well, how do you get the Millennium Falcon to move? Do we have a picture of it tj i don't he's coming steven you want to go grab a picture of it or just text someone to take a picture of it i got it i think both fellas yes what's up boys hello hello hello come on in Come on in. Come on in. Sit on down. So, Trevor 1.
Starting point is 00:18:07 You boys are done for. So, what's your guys' names? I am Zach Sharp. Zach. And Anthony. Anthony. Now, you probably guys have heard this before, but can we call you pinball wizards? No.
Starting point is 00:18:19 Okay, no. All right. Okay, all right. Consent. All right. How did the Who affect the pinball community? It had a song that gets played over and over any time pinball is talked about.
Starting point is 00:18:32 Okay. Would you say the documentary Fistful of Quarters was a positive or negative impact on the pinball community? Well, that was about Donkey Kong. That was, say, King of Quarters or whatever. Oh, that was... Donkey Kong. Okay.
Starting point is 00:18:44 Was there a documentary? All arcade cabinets look the same. There was a documentary. What are your guys' thoughts about Billy Mitchell? Great hot sauce. Okay. That was smart how you answered that. I will say at every pinball expo that we go to, the referee from that movie is at every expo wearing his referee outfit and is usually just kind of walking alone by himself.
Starting point is 00:19:04 That's hilarious. What are your thoughts on skee-ball? It's fine. These guys are the pinball wizards. It's not pinball. It's not pinball. Wait, can you tell them who your dad was the reason that we all enjoy pinball today? Is that right?
Starting point is 00:19:16 That is true. My dad is Roger Sharp. If you go down that rabbit hole, there's a drunk history episode based on how he saved pinball. It's not a documentary, but there is drunk history episode based on how he saved pinball. It's not a documentary, but there is a feature film based on how he met my mom. So you got to watch how your dad met your mom? Yeah, it's a little weird. How graphic was it?
Starting point is 00:19:35 What's it rated? It's, you know, all audiences. Oh, okay. Good, good. But he helped prove it was a game of skill. Oh, so wait. So what happened? It was going to get outlawed?
Starting point is 00:19:45 So it was illegal in all the major metropolitan cities from the 40s to the 70s because the games used to pay out money. And he proved it was a game of skill. So he went in front of a courtroom, called his shots, and then they overturned it. Holy shit. He's the Babe Ruth. He is the Babe Ruth of pinball. And you can do that too, right? You said he can call a shot.
Starting point is 00:20:05 He can be like, I'm going to flick this here, and it's going to go bling, bling, bling, bling, bling, and it goes where you say it's going to go. I'm pretty decent. We did an NIL deal with the Illini football team the last two years, and we set up two machines down there for a couple weeks. All the guys were playing it and having a great time. The machines were getting like 80 plays a day.
Starting point is 00:20:27 They really raised the competitive level. And then when Zach went in there, after they had been playing for a couple weeks all the guys were playing it and having a great time it was getting like the machines were getting like 80 plays a day they like really raised the competitive level and then when zach went in there after they had been playing for a couple weeks he kind of showed them the different techniques and they like their minds were blown because they were watching like a different game that was being played than what they had been doing the last couple weeks oh shit we might have to have you call some shots right now for us okay is it a young man's game or a veteran's game both so both who's the youngest in the hobby right now is there any young hot shots coming up uh my son is turning six oh yeah oh shit the number one ranked player is 18 so you're pinball ball royalty yeah yeah Yeah. Yeah, you could wear that proudly. Like the Manning family.
Starting point is 00:21:06 Yeah, right. Exactly. Okay. His brother also makes pinball machines, too. So, like, it is a family business. Yeah. What are some of the best machines? I know the Kiss one's popular.
Starting point is 00:21:16 Is it a good machine? Yeah. I mean, for me, all pinball. It's kind of like pizza. I mean. Oh, my God. Look at that. Everything's good.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Oh, look at that. And you designed this, right? Yeah. So that was designed, manufactured on Elk Grove Village. So just outside Chicago. So I want to add one more thing. And Zach won't say this because it always kind of embarrasses him. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:34 You guys, most of you guys are probably at age group. The original Mortal Kombat arcade game that came out. Yeah. I don't know if you guys can pull it up on the screen, but this ad was in every bowling alley arcade ever. It was the original ad for Mortal Kombat. Zach is the kid in the little shirt. I'm the kid in the pink shorts.
Starting point is 00:21:54 The pink shorts? In Mortal Kombat. So his dad worked with Midway. What about NFL Blitz? Oh, so NBA Jam? He is a hidden gem. That's you? That's you.
Starting point is 00:22:06 Oh, that's him. Wow. Pink shorts. Wow. Also, his dad is a hidden character in NBA Jam and NFL Blitz. Yeah. Really? How can you get to the hidden character in NBA Jam?
Starting point is 00:22:20 It's R-O-G, and I think the code is 0848 that's pretty badass so what does the competitive scene look like like tournaments around the world or what i fly out tomorrow night to compete in the world pinball championships being oh my god california wow what are what are you seated um honestly i don't know it doesn't matter are you a favorite you Honestly, I don't know. It doesn't matter. Are you a favorite? You know what? I haven't played as much recently, but until I'm out, I'm my own favorite. So have you won it before? I've won the largest pinball tournament in the world. Wow.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Zach, you were at one point the number one ranked player, right? Yeah. I was ranked number one at the end of the world, so I was kind of notated as the world's greatest pinball player. For how long did you hold that title? I had it twice over a five-year span holy shit and what like what is like age do you notice that you're not as good because like is there is there age factor in pinball i mean obviously with quick twitch muscles and reflexes it's a younger person's game, but the Michael Jordan of pinball, he's 50, and he will still mop
Starting point is 00:23:27 the floor with anybody. What makes him the Michael Jordan of pinball? Sure. I'll play one-handed. Okay. Steven, you want to get the Zoom set up? What are you going to say, Nick? The Michael Jordan of pinball? Yeah, his name is Keith Allen. He works for me.
Starting point is 00:23:43 He is a game designer, and he is arguably the best game designer of all time whoa so he's michael jordan of two things yes he just made uh jaws godzilla jurassic park when you have more room we'll get some more games in there hell yeah can we do a yak themed pinball machine oh you never know wow yeah now that now we're talking yeah Now we're talking Yeah Now we're talking Do something Fuck Alright yeah
Starting point is 00:24:08 I want to watch you play I do too Alright so Steven's gonna set up the Zoom He'll go with you And he can watch you guys play And call your shots Alright
Starting point is 00:24:16 Do it Hell yes Thank you Thanks guys Thank you guys for the machine Good luck in the tournament Thank you Yeah
Starting point is 00:24:21 See you boys That's awesome Thank you I'm always so fascinated By anyone who's like Just so into one thing Good luck in the tournament. Thank you. Yeah. See you boys. That's awesome. Thank you. I'm always so fascinated by anyone who's like just so into one thing. Yeah. Brandon, come on down. Brandon, he was a cool guy.
Starting point is 00:24:34 You want to be like that, don't you? I do. Yeah. Hi, Brandon. I'm excited to finally have a toy in this office. I know. Hey, y'all. Hey, Brandon.
Starting point is 00:24:43 Hey. Hey. Brandon, are you a pinball guy? No. I don't have the patience or skill or ability to stand for long periods of time. Oh, yeah. Okay. Those are all, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:52 Yeah. Those are three very key elements. Hi, Mark. Hey, Brandon. Hey. It's been a while. It has. Good to see you, man.
Starting point is 00:24:58 Yeah. Hope that. Mook. How you doing? Good. Kyle. Kyle. Yeah. Nick.
Starting point is 00:25:03 We spoke. Yep. Kate. Hello. All right. Welcome back. Thanks. Did it. Yep. Kyle Nick Kate welcome back thanks thank you thank you Brandon hi Dan
Starting point is 00:25:16 what are you up in arms about as of late Brandon I'm not really up in arms I oh ass god damn it of late, Brandon? I'm not really up in arms. I, um... I... Oh! Yeah! Ass.
Starting point is 00:25:29 God damn it. I don't know if this is going to work. No, it probably won't. We're going to try it, though. He's standing right over his shoulder. I feel like he's got to. I can't really see. I'm tracking. So he's holding the ball. He's tra right over his shoulder I feel like he's got it I can't really see I'm tracking So he's holding the ball He's trapping it
Starting point is 00:25:47 Alright yeah this doesn't work He's cutting off half of the Right We're kind of fucking ourselves It's focused on his shoulder He's going to get a record on this thing We're never going to beat it Also TJ we got to
Starting point is 00:26:00 One of us has got to hug this guy Oh god Well there's two guys Yes we got to hug both of them. I think there's two hugs. Let's do it while the zoom's up. Oh, he tilted. Oh, he did tilt.
Starting point is 00:26:13 Didn't tilt. No, he didn't tilt. Oh, he didn't tilt. I can hear us. Oh, God. You kind of tilted, though. No, tilt would be the shuts off, right? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:26:22 What is tilt? I don't even know what you mean. There's like a little metal ring, and if it touches, it shuts the whole thing off. Some people here are going to become obsessed with that game. You're telling me people here have addictive personalities? Yes. I would have lost already. There's a thing on the machine.
Starting point is 00:26:36 If you hit it, it just turns it all off? Yeah. But that's if you move it too much. Oh, if you literally tilt. Tilt, yeah. Oh. I thought that was like a pinball term. Dude, he's got full control of this ball.
Starting point is 00:26:46 Yeah, it's pretty awesome. He's finessing that ball. Is there only ever one ball at a timeout? I believe so. Here, we should have one of us hug him. There's a shoulder. There's a shoulder. All right, let's do the hug wheel.
Starting point is 00:26:58 All right. Steven, stay on. Stay on, Steven. Oh, he's playing. Oh, perfect. All right. Jay, give your phone to someone else and give these fellas a... During?
Starting point is 00:27:15 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Right now. Yeah, just... I hope he... Maybe just right behind him. Impulsively punches.
Starting point is 00:27:23 Yeah. Don't even tell him. Just kind of caress him from behind. Wait. Hold on. Oh. Impulsively punches. Yeah. Don't even tell him. Just kind of caress him from behind. Wait. Hold on. Oh. I forgot your hug. Oh!
Starting point is 00:27:33 Oh! You're back. Wow. That was going to fill the record. That was the worst yet. That was the worst by far. Cool on-screen graphics. Wait, his eyes.
Starting point is 00:27:43 Oh, cool on-screen graphics. He's bringing up the graphics. He's bringing up the graphics of Pinball. He's trying to change the topic. Cool. Cool graphics. He's going to try to destroy the Death Star. Oh, sweet.
Starting point is 00:28:00 Oh. What is going on? Oh, yeah, he's flying through the trench damn oh my god is he going to destroy the death star no bigger than a womp rat oh hurry up tie fighter hurry up oh the fourth one oh the fourth one in the end. Alright. I'm very excited. Yeah. Thank you, Steven. They're the best. Those guys rock.
Starting point is 00:28:31 That's cool that they're made right here. Yeah. It's awesome. Absolutely. Thank you. And now tell him to get the fuck out. Give him a hug too, Steven. Give him a hug too. Yeah, you only hugged one of the guys. Give him a hug too. Okay.
Starting point is 00:28:47 Oh, Steven. Give him a hug, too. Yeah, yeah. You only hugged one of the guys. Give him a hug, too. Oh, God. Thanks for joining us. Thank you. All right. See you guys. All right. Good job, Steven. Those guys rock.
Starting point is 00:29:01 Yeah, they do. Pinball machine now. It's good to see you, Brandon. Hey, Brandon. Good to be here. Hey, Mark do. I'm ball machine now. It's good to see you, Brandon. Hey, Brandon. It's good to be here. Hey, Mark. You look large. I don't want to say it.
Starting point is 00:29:10 He does. Does he not? You look bigger than normal. He looks bigger than normal. Yeah, I feel big. It's been a big day. How much taller are you than Nick? I don't know if significance is the word.
Starting point is 00:29:21 Have you grown? A little bit. Yeah, I put on some Mississippi. No, I'm saying height. Look at us next to each other. There's something with your hair. We look like a different species. the word but i've grown a little bit yeah i was in mississippi i put on some mississippi look at no i'm saying height look at us next to each other there's something with your hair we look like a different six three and you are six i'm five ten yeah that's right i don't know i just i'm just here man just spent the weekend in mississippi and we were talking about the case race yeah rumble yeah it's gonna rock yeah you You think we should go build it all the way up and then eliminate?
Starting point is 00:29:46 I think so. Or I guess there could be eliminations along the way. Would it be like a chug off real quick? No, we'd just build it up to 8v8 and then we'd wheel it down to 1v1. Yeah. Every five minutes. We'd build up every 10 minutes. I think random eliminations after a certain time.
Starting point is 00:30:03 Yeah. So you said 20 minutes of every full strength? 20 minutes of full strength. Yeah. And then you go five minutes elimination of every single person. I don't hate the idea. Brandon just said of like a challenge where you could eliminate somebody directly. Oh.
Starting point is 00:30:18 I mean, there was going to be people flying out for two beers. Yeah, but then also we'd have uneven teams because you could have like someone could just challenge someone and then just keep picking them off. Yeah, but damn, anything can happen in the Royal Rumble. That's true. It's just going to end up being Will versus Taylor. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:38 And who would watch a show with those two? No. Is there like a timeout bin in wrestling? Could there be like a two teams play flip cup and the loser has to put... It's called the timeout bin. The timeout bin. No, Caden, I'll simply say that's the dumbest thing that anybody's ever said about anything ever. You could get a big ladder.
Starting point is 00:31:00 Now we're doing a Royal Rumble ladder match? Royal Rumble ladder match. There's one golden beer. It's at the top of the gym. Huge ladder. Climb the ladder. That would get very dangerous. Dizzy ladder.
Starting point is 00:31:13 Dizzy ladder. Dizzy ladder, and it adds 10 beers. Oh, my God. Oh, that's right. We have a whole... This would be Beer Olympics, but with a whole gym at our disposal. It's troubling. A better Beer Olympics.
Starting point is 00:31:25 And we're going to air it right before. And we're doing it right before the Beer Olympics, but with a whole gym at our disposal. Yeah. It's troubling. A better Beer Olympics. Huh. And we're going to air it right before. And we're doing it right before the Beer Olympics. Right before the Beer Olympics. And they're in it. I'm excited. I'm so excited for the Beer Olympics. I am too. Just going to get my ass kicked by an offensive lineman in 100 degree heat.
Starting point is 00:31:40 Are there any like Kobayashi's of like Beer Olympics? Like very thin Ooh Donnie's guy Oh yeah He's not thin Peng Zai He's not a thin
Starting point is 00:31:52 He spins them Not a thin fella I guess By the way TJ you're back Hi TJ Hey guys How was darts? It was wonderful Darts
Starting point is 00:32:01 Did you indulge? Yeah I waited at 187 this morning so It's over Wonderful. All right. Dark. Did you indulge? Yeah. You eat a bagel? I waited at 187 this morning, so it's over. It's over. You're out. Get in the sauna suit. It's finished, Jermaine. What, TJ, how was your dad?
Starting point is 00:32:17 About what? Just in general? Yeah. He was good. I actually got an old photo of him from like the early 90s if you want to see a picture of him. Yeah. Yeah. Of course.
Starting point is 00:32:26 Yeah. Let me bring it up. He was good. I saw him on yesterday for a little bit. We went and got some food. Oh, hell yes. He was hanging in there. Did you stay at home?
Starting point is 00:32:35 No, I was in the city over the weekend. Nice. Did you have your cheat meal? I had a couple of cheat meals, yeah. Ooh. What are we talking? What are we talking? Full breakfast.
Starting point is 00:32:44 Whoa. Pizza. No breakfast. Pizza. No cheese. That's not pizza. I didn't want diarrhea instantly. I think I'm lactose intolerant because of this show. Because of the milk? Milk?
Starting point is 00:32:56 I want to do that thing where you can find out what foods give you inflammation. Yeah, you don't want to know. You'll get like chicken. That's like Paul Bearer. He does. Would foods give you inflammation? Yeah. You don't want to know. Oh, really? Because you'll get like chicken. Oh, wow. That's like Paul Bearer. He does. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:33:10 About to put your time out there. That guy is a serial killer. Like I would watch a Netflix special on him. I would. And I'd be too creeped out. He looks like a. What the heck? What's the top photo?
Starting point is 00:33:19 What were those for? Yeah, that's a great question. What is that? Like passport or something. And my mom was doing photography at the time. So she saved them and made this and framed it, I guess. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. passport or something and my mom was doing photography at the time so she saved them and made this and framed it I guess wow yeah that's an elite
Starting point is 00:33:30 he's got a look he looks like Ed Kemper yeah yeah you gotta also remember every single dad in the early 90s looked exactly like this also that was like probably he was probably 29 people looked older yeah well every dad had a mustache yeah that's true he's old He was probably 29. People looked older. Yeah. Well, every dad had a mustache.
Starting point is 00:33:45 Yeah, that's true. He's old. That's also a knee-length Burberry trench coat he's wearing in this. Oh, yeah. He's ready to flash penis and kill. Inspector Gadget. And I'm all out of penis. Inspector Gadget had no impact on my life He had a huge impact on my life
Starting point is 00:34:06 Pretty big for me Affect my future or my present I saw that murderer Matthew Broderick play him In a drive-in And then I wanted to collect all the toys at McDonald's Who was the bad guy? He should have been bigger Mr. Cadillac
Starting point is 00:34:20 What was the jingle? Chicken McNugget buddies Pretty good I just liked his closet I liked Specter Gadget. What was the jingle? Chicken McNugget buddies. Pretty good. I just liked his closet. That's all you liked? A man out of a hat that turned into a helicopter. No, but it was just the simplicity of his closet, just having all the suits.
Starting point is 00:34:37 What was Top Gadget? What was the number one gadget? Helicopter hat. The helicopter hat. Springy legs. Oh, springy legs rocked. The helicopter hat. It has to be the helicopter hat. That's the oney legs rocked but helicopter hat yeah it has to be the
Starting point is 00:34:46 helicopter hat that's the one you want it had like handles over here right yeah hold it sick spy kids had an
Starting point is 00:34:53 impact on my life yeah you remember that the thumb people the thumb people and the microwave that could make anything
Starting point is 00:34:59 I do remember any food yeah you're right you're right I was like I want that made me a very fat child that affected me a very fat
Starting point is 00:35:05 child that affected me too oh smoothie brandon thank you very much i've had a rough morning um so i'm trying to protein up what happened hey nothing everything what am i missing something smoothie did you get a colonoscopy or something? Smoothie. I feel like everyone's talking to you like something bad happened. No, he's fine. He went to a funeral. I was in Mississippi for the death of a very close friend.
Starting point is 00:35:35 Yeah. That was bad. Okay. You want to make an event for it? No. Kate still thinks it's her birthday. I do. In one day
Starting point is 00:35:45 She's kind of taking the whole week I think the cream chip beef looked really good Thank you And I would eat the fuck out of that It did not look good I think it does You could make an argument it tasted good Which would be wrong as well
Starting point is 00:36:00 But you can't make an argument it tasted there You're picturing biscuits and gravy You wouldn't have achieved that I saw it I would eat that well, but you can't make an argument. It tasted there. A white gravy. You're picturing biscuits and gravy. You wouldn't have achieved that. I saw it. I would eat that. You would eat it. You'd eat anything. Was there any garbage disposal? That's not really true.
Starting point is 00:36:15 You won't eat anything green? Anything healthy? Well, okra. I like okra if it's fried. And then it's brown. So it's not really green. Make the so fat i'll eat it i like fried onions yeah wait tj who won darts day uh rob cross you mean the players or no no no of the group the people in the crowd. No, you're, yeah, the Barstool crowd. Like Max wanted a few years ago. Yeah. With his darts walk.
Starting point is 00:36:48 Yeah. I mean, Greer had a Gaz's Soldiers hockey jersey on. That was pretty sick. Fuck yeah. Okay. Clemmer and Meek Phil left a Mets game to come to it. Okay. He left his child too?
Starting point is 00:37:02 Right. He left his baby at the Mets game. Yep. It was a good time. It was a smaller crowd than last year because most of us moved here and nobody else flew back except me. Damn. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:11 Who's that a jab at? Everybody that works in this office. Oh, shit. I never went. Darts used to mean something to some of us. Never went. I never went. Darts is my inspector gadget.
Starting point is 00:37:21 Max killed it last year, right? Yeah. I mean, 150 people went last year. Wait, is there ever going to have darts in my inspector gadget. Max killed it last year, right? Yeah. I mean, 150 people went last year. Wait, is there ever going to have darts in Chicago? Not. Probably not at this level. I don't know. We could maybe hit him up and tell him to come,
Starting point is 00:37:34 but it's like part of their world circuit. Isn't the best player right now like a teen? He was the favorite. Yeah, Luke Littler. He's 17. Did he win? No. Say that again?
Starting point is 00:37:44 He's 17. his girlfriend's 25. They met on FIFA. Is that a... That's a modern romance right there. Okay. Are you guys going to come to Dudes Fest? Dudes Fest sounds awesome. What is Dudes Fest?
Starting point is 00:37:56 Whoa. I know. Kate. I know. I don't think so. I know. I'm just saying I'm jealous. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:38:03 I think Kate's more dude than a lot of dudes. I need zero women at Dudes Fest. She got her tubes taken out. Yeah. That's true. Can there be like a side section but behind a wall if you don't have your tubes? Girl dudes? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:18 Tubeless girls and dudes. Dudes Fest is actually going to run. Y'all already have softball. Yeah. Yeah. I've already started the planning of dudes dude fest is gonna be an open forum for all dudes yep to do whatever they want just do whatever they want yeah i like that it's supportive yeah i'm thinking we're gonna try to
Starting point is 00:38:36 hire a power lifter to just lift a shitload of weight i want to build shit with my hands you can i want to just yeah use like a saw to like just fucking cut some wood. Saw a section. Yeah, there's going to be different – like there will be a section where dudes can submit like the best like brisket they ever made. I'll just show pictures of it. Yeah, you need the smell of barbecue to permeate dude's chest. Candles of barbecue. May I show a PowerPoint presentation on hot chicks I found on Google Images? Yes. Cool.
Starting point is 00:39:01 I want to break shit. Oh, yeah. Like a bat and just fucking break shit. I want to break shit. Oh, yeah. Like a bat and just break shit. I want to do a PowerPoint. Jackhammer guy. I want to do a PowerPoint on all the hot chicks I totally could have fucked. Yeah. On my biggest miss.
Starting point is 00:39:12 Yeah. I could. She wanted it so fucking bad. I just didn't go out to the bar that night. She wanted it so bad. I just. Oh, I might have to go like unlimited price to secure Eulerers fan and she just came in between each fucking oh she might be every 15 minutes yeah titty break
Starting point is 00:39:33 no because with one chick around in a group of dudes they're gonna try that's true that's true we'd have to i mean i'd have to fuck dude's fest is gonna happen i'd have to I mean I'd have to fuck her Dudes Fest is gonna happen I'd have to fuck her I'd have to I mean I'm sorry I don't love that about myself But I would have to I would have to fuck her I have no option We're gonna do a spelling bee style Of name random
Starting point is 00:39:55 Random players Oh cool Yeah Where it's like I think you'll be eliminated If you name like Someone who Like won a
Starting point is 00:40:03 Who was like a MVP or All-Star. Someone who's never won an All-Star. No trophies. You can't see any trophies. A trophy-less athlete. That would go hard. Yeah, because then we'd go up and just start naming a full.
Starting point is 00:40:16 And there'll be rules. You can't name the same player. If you use a team, you can't just go down a line. I want to see dudes pretend to write the names on the back of their number. There's scripts. There should be a constant football in the air. Oh, yeah. Constant toss.
Starting point is 00:40:30 Football, yeah. Dude's Fest is going to rock. It's going to smell like crazy in there. There needs to be some sort of lawn mowing exhibition or something. Maybe a competition. I don't know. Yeah, I'm also going to figure out the legality of like, I want to do it so that when you buy a ticket to dudes fest and you walk in the
Starting point is 00:40:46 door you get like a bet slip for like ten dollars for a game that will be on so we can all all the dudes yeah for the same thing oh i love that yeah it's like we're just a random over and we just have it on in the background we're just all rooting for the same exact yeah doesn't whatever sports it sounds amazing. Yeah. It's going to be fucking great. Kate, don't laugh. I'm happy for you guys. I want you to have a dude.
Starting point is 00:41:11 No grippies allowed. No. No. No Lucy's. No grippies. No Lucy's. No grippies. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:18 The dude's fest. We'll take it on the road. Because Jerry's tweet last night was so funny. If you want to pull it up TJ He tweeted this with Other friends around He's with the foreplay guys Although he said he doesn't really fit in He tried to talk football with them and they didn't say
Starting point is 00:41:34 They just weren't Jerry the foreplay guys Sands, Riggs, plus Francis I think so yeah Yeah he's not going to fit in So he was trying to fit in and then he tweeted last night out of the blue. They should start in OnlyFans, but for guys, not sexual or gay, just like if you want to meet new guy friends to hang out, smoke cigars,
Starting point is 00:41:56 watch sports, golf, et cetera. This tweet probably sounds really gay. I'm not sure why I'm even tweeting it, but I have a hard time making friends. Someone did point out that if you're looking for people who like sports, you could still call it OnlyFans. Yeah. What's sexual or gay? What would be the difference between...
Starting point is 00:42:15 So something could be gay but not sexual? Yes. I guess that would be DudeFest. Yeah, DudeFest would be very gay but not sexual yeah you're right like it's just dudes loving each other what's he thinking chicken fry for oh i don't know what oh i think she she posted again about that time he was like brianna it's me jersey jerry i'm someone that you work with and she's like i i know who you are. Oh. I think she posted that again because it makes her laugh. A little more clout. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:42:47 Jerry, is he in the market for more friends? I think so. He really does want more friends. Yeah. I think he's lonely in the burbs. Like if he lived in the city, he'd have more stuff to do. He texts me about three times a week just random old wrestlers and asking if they're in AEW or if they're wrestling.
Starting point is 00:43:06 Oh, he's still doing that bit? Yeah, he's doing it. It does it about two or three days a week. What's a wrestler you've gotten recently? He asked me if I love the old Matt Hardy versus China matches in ECW. And I said, no, no, Jerry. Neither one of those wrestled. And they would not have wrestled in ECW, you piece of shit.
Starting point is 00:43:27 And it makes me mad every time. And he loves doing it every time. Is Chyna a wrestler? Yeah. She was. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. That was like him versus like.
Starting point is 00:43:35 Not my proudest bone. Oh, yeah. She had a. Oh, it's a woman. Oh. She was on Playboy. With a Y. Yeah, she was on Playboy.
Starting point is 00:43:43 I know black Chyna. No. No, this. Yeah, she was on Playboy. I know Black China. No. This was Hispanic China. She was extremely famous. She was extremely famous. In 1999, 2000, she was extremely famous. I was very famous. And has she perished?
Starting point is 00:43:57 She's perished. She's perished. She was part of, yeah, she ran around with X-Pac. Yeah, that's right. She was a lot of guys' very first weird fat bride. So she is a weird bone? She's very muscular. You could pull her out.
Starting point is 00:44:10 So Kyle, she started in like 97, and she was a big female bodybuilder with a strong man jaw. And then she got plastic tits, and got her face redone, and then she's in Playboy. And even though she still wasn't that attractive, we all acted like she was. So you guys, let's do it now. Let's do it.
Starting point is 00:44:26 Oh, I didn't fake it. I never. Oh, yeah. Yeah? Listen, I mean, you combine wrestling does something to you as a little kid where you're like,
Starting point is 00:44:34 Sable? Sable was one night in China. Oh, different. Yeah, that's China. Oh, that's pretty pretty. Yeah. And then Xbox fucked her and did a video called
Starting point is 00:44:43 One Night in China. Yep. That's how One Night in Paris came out. Correct. Okay, I know her now. Every time you fuck somebody and film it who has a geographical name. Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 00:44:53 Right. Who's next? Oh, it's not Asian China. Nick has one out there. What's yours called? I slept with the entirety of the band Europe. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:03 Yes. His ass has One Night in Emily. Yes, that's right. That's right. I'm just realizing that it's in That's Why. Oh yeah, it makes sense. It just hit me.
Starting point is 00:45:18 It's a city or a state or something. But you're also in them. Who would be the best? Is there a Dakota out there? Brooklyn Decker. One also in them. Who would be the best? Is there a Dakota out there? Brooklyn Decker. One night in Brooklyn. Who bested Paris Hilton? Sydney. Sydney Sweeney.
Starting point is 00:45:32 Oh, Sydney. Oh, yeah. Kathy Ireland. Go to the Sydney Opera House. Kathy Ireland, another one of mine. She's a swimsuit mom. Oh, God damn. Kathy Ireland.
Starting point is 00:45:45 Yeah. She was so hot. One night in... Madison. A lot. One night in Madison. Madison beer. Oh, yeah. Madison beer.
Starting point is 00:45:58 This is a JudeFest conversation. Yeah. You go around the world. We got to stop burning material. We got to do the map. Yeah, spin the globe. You just land on a place, you got to come up with a name. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:46:12 I got to find a chick named Fairbanks quick. You did one night in Texas, right, when you fucked Tico? Jesus. That was Tommy's folks. You did too, though. You dog. She's a friend did too, though. You dog. She's a friend of mine, though. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:46:30 Anybody else almost crashed their car on the drive home yesterday because you were looking for purple hats? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I don't know. I don't have a car. Am I explaining the purple hat? I was just staring at the sidewalk on the drive home. Titus, I went further where I had to stop myself because I took my son to T-Ball,
Starting point is 00:46:46 and there was a kid with a purple hat, and I almost took his picture. What are you doing, dude? Stop. Yeah. Yeah, I'm thinking about it a lot. I could do it on VR if I wanted to. Oh.
Starting point is 00:47:01 The purple hat is Clemmer came in with some ideas that were all, they were good ideas, but they also, like, were, like, fun is Clemmer came in with some ideas that were all, they were good ideas, but they also were like fun for Clemmer. Boring block. Yeah, he wanted to go live in a boring- 72 hours on a New York City block. Yeah. So we came up with the idea, what if he had to find a purple hat in every state in America?
Starting point is 00:47:22 Okay. And it is fun. We had him go out to the West Loop and and he found one, and it was thrilling. How quick did it? About 20 minutes. But there's debates on if it were purple. Yeah, I think it landed 50-50, the poll. Do we have a picture of the hat?
Starting point is 00:47:37 Yeah, you can look at it. It was a skewed poll because, like, both wasn't. Before you answer, what color is Nick's hat? That's blue. Oh, yeah, that color is Nick's hat? That's blue. Oh, yeah. That wasn't a purple hat. This is 50% red, 50% blue, which is a purple hat.
Starting point is 00:47:52 Holy shit. Oh, shit. Holy shit. No, they don't meet. That is a purple hat. Oh, my God. This hat's 100% purple. He has to find only blue red hats. That would be way easier.
Starting point is 00:48:04 Do you think so? Yeah. Do you know the game where you've got to go three, two, one, and you and your partner have to say the same word? Yeah. Right now. Ready? All right. The theme is purple. Okay.
Starting point is 00:48:15 Three, two. You've got to say it with me. Oh, I have to say three, two, one? We're going to say a word. Three, two, one. Barney. I was going to say Barney. Barney.
Starting point is 00:48:24 I was going to say Barneyney now we have to try to meet in the middle okay get some synergy okay three two one grape fuck three two one freeze pop
Starting point is 00:48:41 oh you went far west yeah wait wait now I'm fucked freeze pop. Oh, you went far west. Wait, wait. Now I'm fucked. Freeze pop and Rockies. Okay. Three, two, one, ice cap.
Starting point is 00:48:55 Fuck. Stay with me. I think I'm not smart enough. Why'd you do Northwestern? Titus, let's get into one. You guys try. Give us a theme. It's hard. It's harder than I thought. Give us a theme. It's hard. It's harder than I thought.
Starting point is 00:49:05 Give us a theme. Sports. Okay. Go. Three, two, one. Football. All right. You got it.
Starting point is 00:49:19 You got it. Three, two, one. Baseball. Yeah, I was thinking Cowboys. Okay. Three, two, one, baseball. Yeah, I was thinking Cowboys. Okay. Three, two, one, San Francisco. Fuck. You said baseball and I said giant.
Starting point is 00:49:31 But I said, Matt, you said New York and I was baseball. You got to figure out who you're following. Okay. Who's leading and who's following? We're two alphas. We're two strong, strong. All right. All right.
Starting point is 00:49:39 All right. All right. All right. All right. All right. Where are we at? San Francisco and baseball. San Francisco and baseball.
Starting point is 00:49:45 Okay. You said giant. You can't say the baseball. San Francisco and baseball. Oh, okay. You said Giants. You can't say the same one. You didn't say which Giants. Right. I thought you meant New York Giants. I did, but then we went to Giants and baseball, and I did the Giants and baseball. But I was thinking New York and baseball.
Starting point is 00:49:55 San Francisco and baseball? Yes. Oh, you guys got this. Yes, this is easy. Ready? Yeah. Three, two, one. Barry Bonds.
Starting point is 00:50:02 Yes! Simple as that, boys. You follow me. You follow me. No, it. Barry Bonds. Yes. Simple as that, boys. You follow me. You follow me. No, it has to be there. You have to balance. Okay, all right. Someone give us a topic.
Starting point is 00:50:12 That was easy. Your topic is number. Okay. Yeah. Okay. Three, two, one. One. Yes.
Starting point is 00:50:25 I was going to go ten, and then I saw your eyes. I saw your eyes. Why would you go two? I don't know. It's horrible. It's more of a number than one somehow. All right, Brandon and Kate. Okay.
Starting point is 00:50:35 And then Muko solo. Food. Food. Food. Three, two, one. Chick-fil-A. You got it. Lasagna. You got it. Lasagna.
Starting point is 00:50:47 You got it. Oh, this is easy. Three, two, one, meatball. Lasagna. You can't just say lasagna back. No, I would have went cutlet. Oh, I would have said Sbarro, the fast food of Italian. Ran back lasagna.
Starting point is 00:50:59 Three, two, one, sandwich. Shit. Okay, Italian and sandwich. You got this. You got this. They don't have it. Three, two, one, sandwich. Shit. Okay, Italian and sandwich. You got this. That's easy. You got this. Grab this. That's easy.
Starting point is 00:51:07 They don't have it. Three, two, one, sub. No. I didn't think he would say hoagie. You guys got to go pepperoni off that. Oh, my God. It's right there. Pepperoni was there.
Starting point is 00:51:18 Stop saying words. Okay, but that was there. Try Barry Bonds. It was hoagie and sub. You got the third option. Three, two, one, Barry Bonds. I kind of have three. It was Hogan and Sub. You got the third option. Three, two, one. Barry Bonds. Subway.
Starting point is 00:51:28 That would have been Hero. She said Barry Bonds. Shit. Well, you just... Now what are we... She said Barry Bonds. Subway? Okay.
Starting point is 00:51:35 Okay. Three, two, one. Jared. Shit. Quiz knows. Keep going down Brandon's hole 3
Starting point is 00:51:51 2 1 Jersey Mike's you gotta say toasted when it comes to Quiznos wow she's not
Starting point is 00:51:57 we're the best you guys aren't the best you guys aren't the best we're the best I'm better than all of them I think we could do a dizzy yeah no way
Starting point is 00:52:04 no way you could do a dizzy get out there them. I think we could do a dizzy. Yeah. No way. No way you could do a dizzy. Get out there. Give us another topic. You got to do a dizzy. Ice cream. Wait, they have to spin for 10 seconds and then yell the word together. You find out the hint while you're spinning, too. You both have to think.
Starting point is 00:52:15 Wait, wait, wait. Ready? Yeah. Ready? Yeah. Three, two, one. Sunday. Ben and Jerry's.
Starting point is 00:52:22 You went proper now. That's an option. Okay, I got it. Three, two, one, pint. Ben does. Oh, fuck. Another brand. Oh, fuck. What a game.
Starting point is 00:52:39 All right, I'm going to... Shit. We're not good. You're fine. Give us one more chance. Ready? Three. With pint and...
Starting point is 00:52:50 What is it? Pint and Haagen-Dazs. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Three, two, one. Vanilla. Chunky Monkey.
Starting point is 00:52:59 We're close. Oh, we got this. We got this. We got this. We got this. We got this. Make simple. We got this. What is it?, we got this. We got this. We got this. Make simple. We got this. We got this. Make simple. We got this.
Starting point is 00:53:05 What is it? Vanilla and? And Chunky Monkey. Three, two, one. Peanut butter. Oh, no. Peanut butter. Yeah, I forgot about chocolate.
Starting point is 00:53:14 We had it. We still got it, though. We still got it. All right. Three, two, one. Reese's. Oh, no. Chocolate and peanut butter.
Starting point is 00:53:23 Let's go strawberry. No, I went vanilla, no. Chocolate and peanut butter. Let's go strawberry. I went vanilla, chocolate, Neapolitan, strawberry. I always combine the last. I think chocolate and peanut butter would be Reese. All right. Easy. Now we have Reese's and strawberry. Oh, you might be fucked now.
Starting point is 00:53:44 We're in a mess. Now you're screwed. That's a real mess. Tangled web. That's a problem.'s and strawberry. Oh, you might be fucking it. We're in a mess. Yeah, now you're screwed. That's a real mess. We're in a tangled web. That's a problem. Chocolate and strawberry. I got it. Reese's and, okay.
Starting point is 00:53:54 Three, two, one. Kick that. Twizzlers. Oh, we're on a new path, though. New path. We went to the candy aisle. Kick that and Twizzlers. Okay, okay, okay. Wait, wait, wait. Okay, okay, okay
Starting point is 00:54:06 Wait, wait, wait Okay, I got it You got this, Kyle I got this I'm staying firm 3, 2, 1, starburst Oh my god Oh my god
Starting point is 00:54:19 Oh my god Oh my god You went, where'd you go you're so starburst starburst and i went swedish this is easy guys it's easy okay i got it no i don't have you have it you guys are pretty good right there you're right there yeah unless one of you fucks this up and sends you on a completely different diversion. Alright, Mook, you go solo with country, but we all go at the same
Starting point is 00:54:52 time. If somebody says the same one as you, we get to towel whip you. Wait, what? We're all saying country at the same exact time. If somebody says the same one as you, they get to towel whip you. Yeah, I like that. If two people say the same one as you, we both get to towel whip you. Count us down. If somebody says the same one as you, they get to towel whip you. Yeah, I like that. If two people say the same one as you, we both get to towel whip you. Okay, yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:05 All right. Okay. All right. Count us down. Three, two, one. Afghanistan. Africa? You said Africa.
Starting point is 00:55:14 Oh, my God. Yeah. That's a continent, my friend. Come on. This would be a towel whip right there. We should all towel whip him. Light him up. Bare whip towel whip from the front. Christ.
Starting point is 00:55:24 Africa? Zoc, can you believe that shit? You think all Africans have faith? Fucking move, man. Fuck Africa. What the fuck? Oh, my God. He's in his best Sunoco.
Starting point is 00:55:39 Zah, was your trip derailed at all by goblins? What? I saw that story. That's fake, right? I saw that story, yeah. What? There's goblins taking over Zimbabwe. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:55:55 They're old news articles, and it's going viral. Was there any concern? No. Well, not really. There is. What was your thing there? There is, but Well, not really. There is. What was your thing there? There is, but yeah, not really. Skittles.
Starting point is 00:56:08 Oh, I forgot about Skittles. I forgot about Skittles. I was going to go Lifesaving. Hobbit attacks, yeah. God damn it. Oh, that would have been all right. No, I fucked up. I knew there was one I was forgetting.
Starting point is 00:56:20 Wait, so they got goblins? Yeah, witchcraft. Is this in like a major news? Yeah. I mean, it's, yeah. Wait, so they got goblins? Is this in your, like... Yeah, witchcraft. Is this in, like, a major news? Yeah. I mean, it's... Yeah. Wait, what? Witchcraft.
Starting point is 00:56:30 Terrorized by goblins at night? Oh, this isn't great. Uh, this is bad, Zah. What are they doing about the goblin problem? They held a meeting about it? Female goblins at night. Ah. Blame the women.
Starting point is 00:56:44 Oh, shit. Shit's crazy out there, man. Male officers reported being terrorized by female goblins oh shit shit's crazy out there man male officers reported being terrorized by female goblins tonight bodies being violated sounds awesome are they they just are the goblins fucking ugly bitches fucking are they cheating on their wives and then yeah it was goblins I've been violated oh no a lot of mermaid stories, too. While I was down there. People getting taken by mermaids and all that. Mermaids?
Starting point is 00:57:11 How do you get taken by a mermaid? Well, brother, hang out by the river and find out. Wait, they're river mermaids? Fuck around right now. Freshwater mermaids? River mermaids. You've got to be desperate for a freshwater mermaid. You've got to fuck a mermaid.
Starting point is 00:57:22 You do it on top half. You can pick which half. Where is it? I think you could pick which half. Where's? Which half? I think you go mouth hole. Left side. Would you take a fish head on a woman? Oh, that's a good question.
Starting point is 00:57:35 No, it's not. You're taking the human pussy every time. No, that's not a human pussy. That's a gill. No, not if you take the bottom half. Okay, the two options are top half is woman, bottom half is fish, and bottom half're a bottom half fish. Okay, the two options are top half is a woman, bottom half is fish. Top half fish, bottom half woman. Yeah, I'm going titty fuck finish in the mouth.
Starting point is 00:57:52 I'm taking top half woman. But then you're not fucking a fish. You're blowing another dudes fest topic. No, no, no. It's a simple titty fucking finish in the mouth. No, because that's not fucking. Titty fucking isn't really fucking. But you're finishing the mouth.
Starting point is 00:58:05 Okay, that would feel more like you Titty fucking isn't really fucking. But you're finishing the mouth. Okay. That would feel more like you're hooking up with a human. You could put the sheet over the bottom half. You just got to sheet over the top half and get in that pussy. That's true. Get all in that pussy. Yeah, but then what kind of noises does that fish make? Also, where's the transition from human to is it right above the hips?
Starting point is 00:58:24 I might fuck around and put it in the fish mouth. Put it in the fish? Yeah, the hips? I might put it in the fish mouth. Put it in the fish mouth. I might put it in the fish mouth. I might try that. Oh, you could. See how that feels. You could hit it from the back and grab the fish hook. Grab the hook, dude.
Starting point is 00:58:33 Fish hook from the back. Is it a fish with a dorsal fin? Or a blowhole? Luke, what do you know about shark bones? Fish don't have blowholes. Only mammals. You're right. Only mammals have blowholes.
Starting point is 00:58:45 This fish is going to have a blowhole. You know what I mean? So I get my hands on her. All right, Mook, redemption. Name a country. Any country, Mook. All right. I think you go one by one.
Starting point is 00:58:58 Okay, yeah. You have to run through the gauntlet. Yeah, and you have to change every time. No, this is bad. Yeah, you have to change every time because then we time. You just have to think of seven countries. Just a country. Think baseball. So you count it off, Nick.
Starting point is 00:59:09 You count it off. And then, Brandon, you count it off. All right. Ready, Mook? Yeah. Three, two, one, Germany. Oh, wait. I'm supposed to go?
Starting point is 00:59:17 Okay. Oh, my God. Run it back. He's got it. He's got it. Run it back. Oh, my God. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:59:21 Run it back. Three, two, one, Italy. All right. You with me? Yeah. Three, two, one, Russia. Three, two, one, America. There's no...
Starting point is 00:59:38 There's no stay over there. Oh boy. Kyle's got you. Okay. Kyle's got it. Kyle's locked in. Oh shit. Kyle's got it. Uh, okay. Kyle's got it. Kyle's locked in. Oh shit. He's fucking me up. Oh my god, Kyle's got it. Alright.
Starting point is 00:59:52 3, 2, 1, Canada. Oh, good pull. Thought he forgot him. You might be out. I got it. Are you tapped? I got it. What do you think? Do you want to change?
Starting point is 01:00:05 I'll give you five more seconds. Luke plays a lot of FIFA. Okay. Ready? Yeah. Three, two, one. France. I was going to say France.
Starting point is 01:00:14 I was like, really? All right, Kate, be a hero. Oh, my God. All right. Okay. Let's do it. Okay. Go. These beady little eyes. Okay. Let's do it. Okay. Go.
Starting point is 01:00:26 Feedy little eyes. Okay, ready? Three, two, one. Brazil. England. We got him, though. Come on, Nick. Go again. Oh, we're going back. We're going to get it. I'm going to run out.
Starting point is 01:00:40 Okay. Three, two, one. Mexico. I was thinking Mexico. Mexico is the big one. I would two, one. Mexico. I was thinking Mexico. I would have done Mexico. I'm ready. Keep it going. Oh, I know where he's going. This might be a new high score. Three, two, one.
Starting point is 01:00:58 Argentina. Wow, close. Same area. Luke, you're good at this, dude. I am thinking of FIFA. Okay. Oh, boy. Three, two, one.
Starting point is 01:01:19 Belgium. Fuck. Wait, this would be a good game show, and you get like 100 bucks every time you're right. Yeah. And you could choose one to tap out. I'll take 100 right now. This would be. good game show and you get like a hundred bucks every time you're right and you could choose one to tap out I'll take a hundred right now This would be You haven't earned it yet
Starting point is 01:01:28 You have a chance to win a thousand though This is gonna happen, I like this Think of the whole world Do you want to cash out at a thousand or keep going? You can win five thousand There's so many countries You want to keep going? Alright
Starting point is 01:01:43 Three, two, one Ivory Coast There's so many countries. You want to keep going? Three, two, one. Ivory Coast. Great FIFA team. Okay. I'm ready. Three. Wait, Titus. Oh, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 01:01:58 Oh, pardon me. I get that feeling a lot. I got excited. I got excited. Uh... I got one. Three, two, one, North Korea. Oh, no, we're off. He's going heavy, FIFA. Fuck.
Starting point is 01:02:15 I need a second. Fuck! This is the worst I've ever been at this game. Yeah, me too. I think I got him. Bring it home, Kate. Okay. Okay, I'm ready. Ready? Three it home, Kate. Okay. Okay, I'm ready.
Starting point is 01:02:28 Three, two, one. Czech Republic. Fuck. I want to do Brandon. Oh, let's do Brandon. Mook, you win. Yeah, you won. I want to do Brandon. Brandon, let's do you in professional sports teams. This still involves Talwip.
Starting point is 01:02:43 Big four? Big four. Big four. You almost have it for Anston. Do we say city name or just name? Just the name of the team. Okay. Nickname.
Starting point is 01:02:52 All right. Who's up? Nick. Three, two, one. Crack it. Whoa. Okay. So any league.
Starting point is 01:03:03 Yeah. Brandon, what did you say? Cowboys. Cowboys. All right. Ready? Three any league. Yeah. Brandon, what did you say? Cowboys. Cowboys. All right, ready? Three, two, one. Braves. This is going to be hard.
Starting point is 01:03:12 Yeah. It's going to be hard. Too hard. I'm so fucking locked in. I know where you're going. I know where you're going. How about you can't do the same sport two turns in a row? Oh, I like that rule.
Starting point is 01:03:24 What did you just do? He just did basketball. Basketball. I did. You did, so you can't. Okay. Three, two, one. Twins.
Starting point is 01:03:34 White Sox. Oh, same division. Baseball. Same division. Same division. He's right there. I got you. Three, two, one. Titans. Fuck. He's right there. I got you. Three, two, one.
Starting point is 01:03:47 Titans. Fuck. He could go forever. Come on, Titus. I think he could go forever. No, he can't go forever. There's too many options. He can't duplicate.
Starting point is 01:03:56 He's like a 1 in 90 chance, though. Can't duplicate. Are you ready? Yep. You want to do this? I'm ready. Three, two, one. Red Wings.
Starting point is 01:04:05 Oh, man. Back, two, one. Celtics. Red Wings. Oh, man. Back to basketball. Shit. Let me think of sports teams. You went Celtics. Why would you go Red Wings? I thought you were going to go Red Wings. Three, two, one.
Starting point is 01:04:21 Cheagles. Oh, what a slap in the face. Right in her face. Fuck. It seemed too obvious. That's cocky of you. I like it. I just didn't know that you would know.
Starting point is 01:04:32 Brandon, I know where you're going. I didn't have a high opinion of you. I understand. Yep. I know. I got it. Three, two, one. Dodgers.
Starting point is 01:04:43 Dodgers. Was that hockey or baseball? Baseball. Okay, just one baseball. Now you guys got to try to get it right. Here we go. Three, two, one. Blackhawks.
Starting point is 01:04:59 Oh, shit. I knew he was going to try to get cocky. Well done. I knew he was going to try to get cocky. Well done. I knew he was going to try to get cocky. All right. Bend over, Brandon. Let him tell us. That was fun.
Starting point is 01:05:10 I wasn't trying to do that, too? Was I trying to evade him? I thought I was trying to. No, you get to tell us. That was fun. Man. That's a fun game. That's so fun.
Starting point is 01:05:22 That's a really fun game. Yeah. We got to add some high stakes to it. Oh, my God. Death? Death. Death. Death.
Starting point is 01:05:28 Yeah. You can't survive a round? I feel like everybody could survive a round. I don't know how we've gotten this far into Yak without ever including death on the table. We had a death wheel once. Death to the Yak. We had a death wheel once. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:05:42 And we spun it just to see him. Brandon was the only one that died. Yeah, that died. I'm shocked none of you have ever played like Russian roulette. I've thought about it. Have you had the option to play? No.
Starting point is 01:05:51 But if I was given the option, I probably would. Simulator? Do a simulator real quick. Are there people in this world actively playing Russian roulette? Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 01:06:00 Yes. Every now and then somebody dies from it. The Russians. Caleb's neighbor. What? What? Caleb's neighbor. He talks about that. Caleb's somebody. Every now and then somebody dies from it. The Russians. Caleb's neighbor. What? What? Caleb's neighbor.
Starting point is 01:06:07 He talks about that. Caleb's neighbor died from Russian roulette. What? Jesus. He talked about it on the show years ago. I don't remember that. I don't remember that at all. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:14 Caleb Presley. Yeah. Oh, thanks. Oh, okay. I think you're about Caleb Williams. Caleb on this show. Yeah, I think that if someone handed me a loaded gun and there were like one bullet, I... In no way would I ever believe it.
Starting point is 01:06:30 That thrill is just so insane. I feel like Chef Donnie has been offered to play before. I bet you he has. Yeah. Yeah, people do parkour on those tall buildings, like jumping for a rush. And that's a matter of when they die. They always die. Of course somebody's playing Russian Relay.
Starting point is 01:06:44 Yeah. And Donnie plays the of when they die. They always die. So of course somebody's playing Russian roulette for the rush. And Donnie plays the knife game. Yeah. Which obviously doesn't kill you, but really could hurt you very badly. That's insane. Would you do, like, what would the payout have to be for you to really think about? I honestly think in the right, yeah, mind. Never do Russian roulette.
Starting point is 01:06:58 Maybe just do it. It's such a thrill. If I didn't have kids, I think 10 million I would absolutely Is there a Russian roulette simulator? It would be Okay this is me doing it right now If you handed me the gun I'm doing it right now
Starting point is 01:07:11 Spin the barrel I'm doing it right now Spin the barrel Spin it Spin it I'm doing it This is me for real Doing Russian roulette
Starting point is 01:07:17 Alright Now pull the trigger Pull the trigger Oh you're dead You're dead Fuck You're dead Oh shit God damn it Fuck But I Oh you're dead You're dead Fuck You're dead
Starting point is 01:07:25 Oh shit God damn it Fuck But I I guess I wouldn't know That I lost Yeah Yeah that's true
Starting point is 01:07:33 Yeah You had a 16% chance of losing Damn Wait that What are the odds Have you guys talked anywhere About the guy that was Betting on baseball
Starting point is 01:07:40 Yeah 4% 4% Makes me feel good about myself That's How do you know He bet on the Pirates know? What was he? Was he tailing quick picks? Was he tailing quick picks?
Starting point is 01:07:53 That's it. Don't laugh, Steven. That's on you, too. I'm the lead on that show. Plus money. He's plus money? I don't know. I can't believe I just died. You died. Yeah. That was it.
Starting point is 01:08:06 It was worth it, though. Went out a legend. 4.3. 4.3% of 200. And he plays baseball. God damn. 231. I thought it was like 25.
Starting point is 01:08:14 He must have been just doing insane parlays. He does high stakes parlays. Yeah. Which is fun. Yeah. Because you can't. I mean, if you just bet straight up, there's just no way you can go four point. Although there's spin stretches.
Starting point is 01:08:27 Was he good? Was he like, does he have a major league future? He's on the Padres. How about the guy who's the infielder who's now a knuckleballer? Yeah. Who is like best friends with Shohei. I love that. Jack Bump.
Starting point is 01:08:39 Yeah. I said there should be more knuckleball. Yeah. And immediately they did say like, fuck it, I'm going to throw a knuckleball. He's an infielder? Yeah. Was an infielder. Like a utility man.
Starting point is 01:08:49 Sucked as an infielder. Remade himself as a knuckleballer. Also, he's best. This is the actual knuckleballer in MLB right now. Oh, my God. That's awesome. Can't even catch it. But he's also under investigation because he's best friends with Shohei.
Starting point is 01:09:05 Yeah. And he bet with the same, or his friend bet with the same bookie. Oh, my God. Does Shohei just speak English and doesn't need a translator? I think he does. That's my theory. Because his best friend is just David Fletcher? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:22 Who's David Fletcher? The guy we're talking about? Oh, yeah, yeah. That might not be his name. It is David Fletcher. Yeah, it is David Fletcher. Some's David Fletcher I would the guy we're talking about oh yeah yeah oh that might not be his name it is David yeah this is David Fletcher I'm striking out Jackson holiday oh shit well that's not hard show he bow oh that's I liked someone I can't remember who last night threw out the
Starting point is 01:09:39 idea for the yak Royal Rumble case race can we get some of the Orioles back that was me. Yeah. They're playing a season right now. Don't care. It was a great idea. I would love them. On a Wednesday.
Starting point is 01:09:52 They were here before. I'm sure they drink on their off days. Get Alex Caruso in here. Yeah. Yeah, true. Get him in here. He's a Caruso. You just want compliments. Torkelson.
Starting point is 01:10:04 He did? That's tough That's our guy Has anyone tracked his hitting before and after? He took the wiffle He's been bad all year He didn't hit a home run until like the middle of May But he smoked it
Starting point is 01:10:21 He hit the shit out of the You never want to be in the company of howie schultz oh my god howie schultz a basketball player played no way howie schultz played basketball morel is hitting below the mendoza line christopher morel titus or at least he was the other day oh my god i don't know if he's that bad yeah he does a good job only hits ding yeah he does a good job of hitting a 500 foot home run every like the other day i was watching the game he was like 196 with 10 home runs yeah which kind of rocks just like i hit dingers howie schultz the starbucks guy yes no i thought he wrote peanuts same guy no howard charles yeah charles Schultz. I thought he wrote Peanuts. That's not the same guy. No, Howard Schultz. Charles Schultz. Howard Schultz is a Starbucks guy.
Starting point is 01:11:05 That's the guy. He fucking... Yeah. Baseball, huh? Jim Davis did Garfield. Jim Davis did Garfield. Sonics out of Seattle. Jim Davis?
Starting point is 01:11:12 Jim Davis is alive. He's alive. Gary Larson did Farsa. I listened to a full podcast about the Sonics leaving Seattle, and what the Oklahoma City guys did to Howard Schultz, they duped him so good. That's what we're pro Fugman. Yeah. We're pro Fugman.
Starting point is 01:11:28 They had so they had a group of guys that wanted the Oklahoma City Thunder, you know, the Sonics in Oklahoma City. And they added a guy to their group who had no ties to Seattle, but he got he got engaged to his wife in Seattle, and that guy they put in the forefront to convince Howard Schultz to sell the team, being like, yeah, I love Seattle. This is where I met my wife or got engaged to my wife. And then as soon as they had that meeting, the guy basically disappeared from the group. Wow.
Starting point is 01:11:59 That's all it took? Yeah. Hey, I've been to Seattle. I think, yeah, I won't. Yeah, pretty much. So has that been worth it so far? What do you mean? Has that been a valuable decision? been to Seattle. I think, yeah, I won't. Yeah, pretty much. So has that been worth it so far? What do you mean? Has that been a valuable decision?
Starting point is 01:12:08 Not for Seattle, but for Oklahoma City, yes. I don't know about for the owners. I don't know if they've made more money than Oklahoma City. For like the NBA, who makes more money? I think it's been pretty good just because they've- Isn't Seattle's market much larger than it would have to be, right? And they'll probably add Seattle back. You would have thought they would have done it by now well i think they're gonna add vegas right yeah i think that's the the two vegas gonna have all four soon
Starting point is 01:12:33 yeah i think are they still going because it feels like the a's don't want to go and say they don't they they don't want to play all their home games and yeah they're gonna go to sacramento but even when they're in ve, they're trying to not play. I think I saw that. They're trying to... Idiot. I think they just now realized how hot it's going to be. John Fisher sucks. Summer in Vegas. The heat.
Starting point is 01:12:54 That would suck. Imagine playing a game in the middle of summer in Vegas. Couldn't be me. Getting drunk. Yeah. Oh, man. Have you seen the Chicago Cubs ball hawks? Yeah, of course. Out on the street? I've seen clips.
Starting point is 01:13:12 Is that during batting practice? They do batting practice during the games, too, but it's waned because they put up the big jumbotron and they put up a big sign. So a lot of the balls, and they expanded the bleachers in like 2014, 15. So not as many, like only a few go out there now. You're talking about the people on Waveland and Sheffield? Yeah. The gloves.
Starting point is 01:13:34 But it used to be a lot bigger because it used to be that like a regular home run would go out. Yeah, 98. It was crazy. Now it's like none of those home runs go out. Like maybe like once a week. Do they still stand there? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:47 They still listen on the radio. Okay. They still got the dudes in San Francisco in the kayaks? Yeah. They actually added a TV. Yeah, this is the first year they put a TV out there. So I didn't realize those guys were just sitting out there blind. Oh, they added a TV.
Starting point is 01:14:01 For them to watch? Yes. Oh, wow. Yeah. I don't know how they had the tech for that. Wait, they could be right next to a baseball game in a kayak? Yes. At Oracle.
Starting point is 01:14:10 The balls go out into the water. Wait, the field is next to water? Yeah, right next to the McCovey Cove. And they just run around and grab it. Yeah, there used to be a lot more, but now because that's so bad. Where is that camera attached? Why is this like watching a crab? Oh, got to go in that house.
Starting point is 01:14:27 Where is the camera? Where is the, what's it attached to? It's on his glove. Wait, go do it again. That's sick. So yeah, they built them back and then, oh wait, this is right before the sign. Oh, this is an old video. So yeah, this is an old video. So yeah, this is an old video.
Starting point is 01:14:45 That used to happen a lot. Well, look at that little... Oh my God. Now the Jumbotron just fucked him. Damn. Yeah. Poor guys. Nick, will you rip the Better Help Out?
Starting point is 01:14:58 Yeah. Rip it for me. Thanks for asking. I don't think I have that. Do I have an old ad? We don't have that out today. We had it yesterday. I'll talk about High Noon though. Oh, I got an old sheet.
Starting point is 01:15:20 I'll talk about High Noon. Introducing High Noon's all new vodka iced tea. It's time to finally ditch those sugary malt based teas and try High Noon. Introducing High Noon's all-new vodka iced tea. It's time to finally ditch those sugary malt-based teas and try High Noon vodka iced tea made with real vodka and real iced tea. It's non-carbonated with no added sugar and 90 calories. High Noon vodka iced tea is great for any occasion under the sun, and it comes in four delicious flavors you've got to try. Original peach, lemon, and raspberry.
Starting point is 01:15:39 Visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you. And let me talk real quick about game time. I'm going to the Cubs game tonight. Nice. I might have a high noon. Did you know that you can get tickets to White Sox Cubs tonight for only 48 bucks? That's right. Thanks to game time, the official ticketing partner, Barstool Sports.
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Starting point is 01:16:33 Yeah, we do have an Omaha Steaks gauntlet today. It's been a while. Sponsored. Sponsored. What's the prize, TJ? It's a steak. Donnie's cooking. So he'll bring something in.
Starting point is 01:16:44 I think it's a steak sandwich and then he also has ice cream for he wants you guys oh yeah he's got still blue ice cream oh yeah let's do look at Blutman shorts let's let's do two the winner gets the steak. They're magnificent. I do feel like longer shorts are making a slight comeback again.
Starting point is 01:17:10 You think so? Kate, what did you wear yesterday? Okay, a tent. Brandon, we're not going to do it yet. We'll do it in like ten minutes. Wait, why didn't you wear the pink? I was going to and I was like, I can't do two in a row. I gotta give it a break.
Starting point is 01:17:24 So tomorrow or Friday. I will. Look at those shorts, Blutman. Those are some shorts. He's wearing longs. We're really wearing longs. Steven, what do you got on your prep sheet? Oh, he's not here.
Starting point is 01:17:40 He's out there. Oh, people were. Do you know anyone whose favorite color is orange? Like every Tennessee fan Steven, what is that question? Come here I want to do the Che prep sheet I want to collab with Che on a prep sheet
Starting point is 01:17:57 Okay I want to That could make history That would be like Sunoco and Tommy My son's prep sheet said Who has sharper teeth, Stella or a shark? And I said a shark, and he said wrong. Whoa. Damn.
Starting point is 01:18:12 Maybe next time. My dog has sharper teeth than a shark. Some sharks. Yeah. There's a lot of people with their favorite color orange. Really? Like every Tennessee fan ever. I guess.
Starting point is 01:18:28 But like from your legit favorite color from a child was orange? Orange or red. Georgians, Floridians. Let me call my boy Matt Seibert. I think his favorite color was orange growing up. I'm going to call Big T right now. But Big T like got that due to going to Tennessee. But that's still his favorite color.
Starting point is 01:18:45 It's the color of sunsets and warmth. What prompts this question? It's a good question. I never met anyone with a favorite color of ours. Like a kid. My kids, their favorite color is a huge deal. Hello? Hey, are you here?
Starting point is 01:18:57 Yeah. Can you come into the act real quick? Yeah. All right, thanks. Wait, thank you. Sounded like he was on the shitter. Steven, what's your favorite type of sand white oh he got you there no he didn't he just answered the prompt i would you need a podcast
Starting point is 01:19:13 come up with prompts i'm gonna go home and just think about che prompts all night do you guys know anyone that's ever been to dubai not counting za or donnie i do why don't why can't you why can't you tell three people we know well yeah well that's ever been to dubai not counting za or donnie i do why don't why can't you we know well well that's because like everyone will know that person it's like do you know a person that not out of the people that haven't been to dubai you know anybody that's been um i know probably do a bunch of instagram models big t real quick i got one question for you you don't even need to sit really um what's your favorite color orange thank you all right thank you that's it yeah no do you know anyone whose favorite color is orange
Starting point is 01:19:56 appreciate it there it is. Myth busted. That was so easy. I might go to bat for orange being the best color. Whoa. Dude, come on. Orange is upbeat. It's warm. It's not practical.
Starting point is 01:20:23 Blue beats every color. It's refreshing. Even if blue's not your favorite color, it's everyone's. Come on. Oh, no. This is going to turn into a screaming match. Purple S, obviously. Purple S? No.
Starting point is 01:20:35 The color of royalty. A. Purple's A. I've never seen it before. Blue is S. Blue is S. Blue and black are S. So would you rather live in a blue world or an orange world?
Starting point is 01:20:46 A blue world. Red is S. We live in a blue world. We live in a blue world. Blue in a... I think brown is D. Green is A. When was the last time you wore orange?
Starting point is 01:20:53 Green is S. When was the last time you wore orange? Green is A. Green could be S. Fashion-wise, yeah. Oh, yeah. Red is S. Orange and S.
Starting point is 01:21:00 Red is S. Red is S. But blue and red are S. Red and blue are S. If you mix them together, you get purple, which is double S. Yep. Yellow is D or C. S plus.
Starting point is 01:21:08 C. Yellow is C. D. Pink is C. Yep. Brown is D. No. Brown is probably C.
Starting point is 01:21:15 Brown is C. White is A. No. No. White is B. Orange is B. I think orange is D. Green is... I think green is overrated. I think pink is higher. No, gray isn't D. I B. I think orange is D. I think green is overrated.
Starting point is 01:21:27 No, gray isn't D. I think pink and orange are equal. I think we kind of nailed this. I think gray is C. That might be right. You think that's correct? I think we just did the first correct one. I'd move green to B.
Starting point is 01:21:38 Yeah, me too. I would say. No, no. Green is A. Oh, wow. And pink is B. Well, wait. i like the evenness of all twos yeah maybe we can add one more tier a god color and i think out of the top and the s's what is the the best color we need a we need a first oh blue oh no baby blue baby blue it's blue baby blue i
Starting point is 01:22:03 think it's black out of the colors we have baby blue is the blue. It's blue. Baby blue. I think it's black. Out of the colors we have. Baby blue is the best. Oh. Black might be the best. I think black. I like... But, like, when I think of the word color, I think of red. Red is the color.
Starting point is 01:22:16 Oh, I think blue. It's the pinnacle. Red's like the original color. Red is definitively a color. So what is a color if something is that color that's a bad thing? What is a color that doesn't fall into that category? There's nothing. No, I mean brown.
Starting point is 01:22:31 You're like, you want this brown shirt? Yeah. Brown suits are cool. Brown's chocolate. No, brown suits are not cool. Brown is chocolate. Red is associated with bad a lot. Brown is a dog.
Starting point is 01:22:43 But like red is blue is sad. I think orange is the best. Aqua? I think it might be blue. That's plus? I'm a blue guy. Blue is so versatile. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:53 And it just, yeah, like you can get baby blue from blue. Yeah. Sky blue? Everybody wears blue. I think red is the color. You think the color, close your eyes and think color's red. Okay. Blue.
Starting point is 01:23:03 But clothes. There's some people that don't look good red. Yeah, it's not proud. Yeah, I don't. I look terrible in red. Yeah. I look like the Kool-Aid man. Everybody can wear blue.
Starting point is 01:23:13 Blue is the best. Blue is the every man's color. Red is the most colorful. Yeah. It's the colorist. Man. Wow. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:22 Man, this is. Yeah, we kind of nailed it though, I think. That's it. Hell yeah. Also, it's funny that the tears are all colored. Whoa. Whoa, maybe they're telling us what the tears are. They gave us the answers.
Starting point is 01:23:38 Fucked it up. I'm happy with this. I am, too. Yeah, this is actually... I've never felt good about doing one of these Kate no Tweet this out Green is egregiously low
Starting point is 01:23:51 It is, olive green I think is the best color Yeah green is a really good color I'd swap green and white Let's collab with food I can't White t-shirts are a gamble You look flabby in white White t-shirt are a gamble. You look flabby in white. White t-shirt is timeless.
Starting point is 01:24:06 They're terrible. I can't wear white t-shirts. So is red. A red t-shirt? No, red. The color red is timeless. Take out brown. What color has the best top three foods?
Starting point is 01:24:19 Pink starburst. Pink sunset. Orange. It's orange. Pink drinks. It might be red. Parrot. And orange. Orange. It's orange. Pink drinks. It might be red. Parrot. And orange.
Starting point is 01:24:26 Orange chicken. Orange chicken. Red, though. Like pasta. Cajun fries. Yeah. Pizza. Hot wings.
Starting point is 01:24:36 Yeah. It might be red. It might be red. So red is... You got to remember pink has... But blue isn't in the food game. At all. Yeah, but blue raspberry blue raspberry as a kid that's like that's not a food yeah but that makes it more i think not being in the food game makes it more of a color good vape oh my god yeah
Starting point is 01:24:55 it doesn't fuck with foods it's just a color he does one thing well colors yeah all these other ones have other adventures yeah right who has just been like I'm a color Don't fuck with me I hate I hate conceding in arguments Because I love to bicker But blue is Also think about it
Starting point is 01:25:11 The world is what 75% blue Yeah The ocean Oh god fuck But do we like that About the world Yeah
Starting point is 01:25:17 I think so I don't think I do man What if we swapped it with red That would look crazy cool What is that Pale blue dot That would be Yeah Yeah That's earth the pale blue dot it makes you think if the sky was red vibes would be very different oh it'd be terrible the sherwin-williams logo is have you seen that
Starting point is 01:25:37 no it's the most metal logo of all time but it's the world right yeah and it says paint the what's the most common can you google what's the most common color in logos? That's blue. It probably is. Nah, because I'm thinking of like Target. Okay. Oh, that'd be great. I'm thinking about like the St. Louis Cardinals. Yeah, I'm thinking of red, though.
Starting point is 01:26:00 There's some red things. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, shit. IBM, Volkswagen. Red? Red's got red things. Whoa. Whoa. Oh, shit. IBM, Volkswagen. Red? Red's got some power. A lot more purple than I thought.
Starting point is 01:26:09 Disney. And these are all the companies in the world, right? Yeah. That's right. Every single one. My favorite company is Batman. We're tough. Yo.
Starting point is 01:26:22 Yeah, they just threw Patman in there. Batman, Ferrari, Lakers. Tic Tac. Warner Brothers, that's pretty strong. Not a lot of orange. Yeah, wait, so you have to pick one color to fight with and the other ones are coming at you. I think I'm staying blue.
Starting point is 01:26:41 You got PayPal, Hyundai. Virgin. Volkswagen. This has been fun. Blast. Good job, guys. We handled this very democratically. Yeah, that was the best we've done for John and Tia. All right, so we'll do two gauntlets, and the winner gets a steak.
Starting point is 01:27:05 Yeah. Hell yeah. What if the... I hear Mincy. Yeah, he's so loud. He's so loud. Tell Mincy to go away, Che. Tell Mincy to go away.
Starting point is 01:27:18 Yeah. Tell him to go away. Just blabs. Luke Blubman with the yellow shorts. You don't see that every day. Yeah, almost never. How'd the intern interviews go? I didn't do them. I didn't do them either.
Starting point is 01:27:35 I nominated somebody to give it a shot. Danny Conrad. Oh, that's a good call. I'm trying to get him in more stuff. He's a really good deadpan guy. And he's reluctant, which makes me want him to do it more. Oh, I love that. I forced.
Starting point is 01:27:51 Yeah, he's very funny. He is. And then I did a round with Jerry, which was insane. Yeah. Insane. Only imagine. Yeah. There's a wrestler intern now.
Starting point is 01:28:03 Who? Someone told me. Who told you that? Is there a new boy? Oh, there was a Nate intern now someone told me who told you that oh there was a Nate was he on the squad or what is he a wrestler that's what I was told interesting we have a Matt
Starting point is 01:28:16 and we have a new girl a full time girl Anna I thought it was Annika Annika oh Annika's full-time, not intern? I think so. She's big on TikTok, I believe. Oh, awesome. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:30 Nice. Are one of those Anika? No, we don't need you. Yes, I think so. We were saying you're talking very loudly. Yeah. Got it. Oh, that was mean.
Starting point is 01:28:44 We're on a mincey hiatus. Yep. That was mean. I'll tell him after. I mean, I don't know why he thought Stephen did this shush to him. There he goes. Now I got to apologize to him. I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:29:00 You're good. It's like when you step on your dog accidentally. They won't understand, sorry. Yeah, the yelp. You just got to take them on a walk. No, I always give Stella kisses whenever I step on her. Does she understand kiss? Yeah, probably not.
Starting point is 01:29:14 I think dogs don't like it. Have you seen the dude that rat battles his cat? No. And the cat understands what's going on? What? Is Rome going to be in a huge rat battle? Yeah, what? One million dollars? He was in a fucking...
Starting point is 01:29:28 That's got to be the most nerve-wracking I saw this year. I loved his answer when he said, of course. Can you find it, TJ? Roan was with... I love basketball. He's great. he's great. No, we're not.
Starting point is 01:29:47 He's great. He's great. He's literally great. And he raps. I know. I heard it. And I put a million dollars behind anybody who want to freestyle him. Right now.
Starting point is 01:29:55 Hey, Verb. Hey, Verb. Hey, Verb. Yeah. Let's line it up. From St. Louis, set it up. Jack. He's going to be on my pod.
Starting point is 01:30:02 Hey, Verb. Who? Yeah, so we set that up. Great. Set it up. Hey, Verb, we're on. We already know what that is. Are you better than Charlie Clips? Of up. Jack. He's going to be on my pod. Averill. Yeah, so we set that up. Great. Set it up. Averill Rome. We already know what that is. So you're better than Charlie Clips?
Starting point is 01:30:08 Of course. I love that. Of course. Of course. Hold on. You're going to battle with Good? I'm going with Good. I'm going with Good and Clips, dog.
Starting point is 01:30:19 I'm going with Good and Clips. I'm going with Good. I think Good. He does. I put a million. He's like our pocket street cred I know Roan it's so cool to
Starting point is 01:30:30 have I like not that I forget that about him but I was reading the comments on that and so many people were like really
Starting point is 01:30:36 into rap battle were all confirmed oh yeah they were like don't fuck with Roan he's like number one across the board I was like oh shit
Starting point is 01:30:42 yeah I've got to forget that yeah he had a lot of people be like these guys don't know who Roan is. Which has got to be the best feeling in the world. When you were with Benny the Butcher and he freaked out that that was Roan. Yeah, that was an all-time
Starting point is 01:30:52 moment for myself. That clip made me feel good. Roan's top three moments are my top three moments. That was so cool when he was like, oh, you guys fuck with Roan? We're like, yeah, we work with him. He's like our good friend. He walked in.
Starting point is 01:31:08 Yeah, Roan had to have. Yeah, but he's so cool about it, too, because I would have freaked out. Oh, I would have freaked the fuck out if you put a million dollars behind me. Golki called you shooter and you cummed your pants. Yeah, I did, yeah. It was Caruso. It was Caruso. It was Caruso, but yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:23 No, if you were like, I'm putting a million dollars on Titus that he's a better shooter than anyone in this office, I would shit my pants out of it. Yeah. I'd be like, oh, my God. A million. Something that I'm very confident in, I would still be. Or we had one of the interns say that he was the second best shooter in the office,
Starting point is 01:31:41 and then he went like two for 20. Which one? Joey. Oh, my God. He's irrationally confident. It's crazy. Yeah. It was very stupid, and he just kept on shooting and kept on missing.
Starting point is 01:31:51 Did he concede, or did he? Probably not, but we all know that he was very quickly a guy you don't want on your pickup team, which is not a thing you want. No. a guy you don't want on your pickup team which is not a thing you want no but you can tell almost instantly being like oh this guy's just he's not gonna like set picks or get back on defense or he's there to launch yeah pass do all the things that makes when you play pickup with people who know what they're doing to a little bit of extent doesn't matter if they're good or not it's just more fun stand in the right place yeah
Starting point is 01:32:27 would rather have him or Reed he's got some Reed in him Reed at least knows what he's doing he just can't I love Reed man I love watching Reed play basketball dude just can't Reed tries shit that he's never tried in his life
Starting point is 01:32:44 like Reed watching him play basketball he's never tried in his life like reed's reed watching him play basketball he's like i think i do have like a an inside out dribble step back fake spin fade away in my back i think i have that and it's like reed you've never practiced this ever what made you think that that was gonna go well he's like i don't know i just fuck it i felt like trying it i don't know if you noticed. I just got a new thing for pickup basketball. When we get to the second or third game, it's just very analytical of me. I just stand in the corner to space the floor. Some space in the floor.
Starting point is 01:33:14 I'm not even trying to shoot. I'm not being lazy. I'm just spacing the floor. I'm letting everyone go to work. I'm just going to be the PJ Tucker of this team. How do we feel about getting stats going for you guys? We could. The problem is, and Nicky Smokes did this on Friday,
Starting point is 01:33:32 which we told him he broke bro code. When we're playing, we're just out there having fun. The minute you're like, oh, this is stats or camera, it just divides completely. It changes. It's a different game. The best part of pickup when you're playing is like, yeah, you want to win,
Starting point is 01:33:47 but when you lose, it's like, alright, I'm going to play again in five minutes. But when you're like, people are watching, you're just like, what the fuck? Also, we don't need video or stats or anything else to validate the claims. We need, because like, the best part about pickup is like, I was fucking on fire. Yeah, right. Like, no one
Starting point is 01:34:03 could fact check. Yeah. Like, I was hitting everything. Yeah, and the, because then you can let anyone, like, my on up is like I was fucking on fire. Yeah, right. It's like fishing. Yeah. Like I was hitting everything. Yeah, because then you can let anyone – like my on fire is if I hit two shots. Yeah. Did you see me in the light? Right. And if we have a box score that we tweeted out that you were three for 15. Yeah, right. It ruins it.
Starting point is 01:34:17 It ruins everything. The other move I do is if I hit two shots at some point – like if I hit two shots early, I'll make sure at some point we pause for score because everyone has to say what they made i got three yeah what do you get yeah right wait is it six five or five five six like what's the score i'm like i got three yeah all i know is i gotta get you out everyone count it and now i want to play because I think it's going to be fun. I would love to see you play. You'd have a good time.
Starting point is 01:34:47 You would not be the worst, I promise you. I could blend in and not do anything stupid. It's very low pressure, too. Do you pick new teams each time or it's kind of the same? Shoot and then we'll switch them up. The problem is we always have like 18, so then we have a rule that if you win two games, you've got to got to come off okay it'd be great if we could just get 15 every time we need a second court yeah we probably do who is someone that is actually on fire right now connor griffin what
Starting point is 01:35:16 he played great ebo ebo plays well yeah ebo connor griffin is uh he's locked it he told me he's locked in at a level he's never been before. He actually might be. I believe him. He's all over the floor. Yeah, it's all coming together for him. He's just seeing the core. The game has slowed down.
Starting point is 01:35:34 And he plays good fundamental basketball. Oh, yeah. Who takes it too seriously? Nicky Smokes. Nicky Smokes is always the number one guy who could get in a fight. Yeah. Smokes plays prison yard ball. Yeah,. I almost got a prison yard ball. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:35:45 And I almost got into a fight with him a couple of weeks ago because he did. One of my least favorite things in pickup basketball is he called a foul without calling a foul. So he was like, that was a foul, but I'm not going to call it. Either call it or don't. Like, you can't do that. Like, either it's a foul or it's not. Don't complain about a foul, but you get to call your own fouls. No, we don't have to play this. It's also didn't you can play but he didn't play i don't i mean i don't i don't know what i'm trying to explain to him that this is like a pretty standard
Starting point is 01:36:15 yeah basketball and like you tell tight it's not wait yeah you just made a he made a jump shot over me and then he he pulled he made a jump shot over me then and then he pulled. He made a jump shot over me, then he was supposed to play in the next game because his team won. Got him. He was nowhere to be found, so someone else had to fill in for him for the next game, and then we later found out he was missing because he was going to pull the tape of him making a jump shot over me to then tweet out to prove how good he was.
Starting point is 01:36:40 And I tried to explain to him, that actually undermines your Hooper credibility because you're making a big deal about yes a pretty routine and he were you embarrassed after that no no i didn't think i actually there were uh luke blutman had a way better he scored on me and it was like like he was like crossing up and everything and then he hits like a hook shot over me and i was like if anyone should pull a tape it should be him dude that was sick um but we got nikki smokes back because we he he came in. Me, Brandon, and Titus were just hanging out after in the Mostly Sports studio.
Starting point is 01:37:10 And Nicky came in, and we told him he broke bro code. You would think that we had killed him. No, he doesn't like it. He was so upset. He would rather be charged with an actual crime. He broke bro code when he posted the picture of me without my consent. Oh, yeah, he did. He's not good at bro code when he posted the picture of me without my consent. Oh, yeah, he did. He's not good at bro coding.
Starting point is 01:37:27 In a public situation, you've got to make sure, hey, you didn't tell anyone you're here when you're here. He didn't clear that up with me. You're a raw dog on a beach with a twink. Yeah. No, he – Yeah. Look at that twink.
Starting point is 01:37:38 I could have told somebody else, like, hey, I'm staying in right now. He might be the – Could have been me. Worst bro code guy we got. Yeah be the could have been me worst guy we got yeah he's the least bro code guy we got yeah which should that hurt that should be the only thing he has really literally i told him that i was like dude yeah everyone asked me what is nikki smokes like douchebag idiot loser but at least he follows bro code no longer. He's a – oh. That's him.
Starting point is 01:38:08 He's the man. He is the man. But, like, yeah, every time I've gone out with him, there's a tweeted video of me from his account. That's violent. Get you. Yeah. He's been on fire video-wise, though. He's been a banger.
Starting point is 01:38:18 The impression. Oh, yes. Yeah, he is. All right, TJ, you want to spin the wheel, and we'll do this gauntlet? So we'll do two. I want a steak. First winner gets a steak. Did we lose Brandon? He's hovering, so keep him on the wheel.
Starting point is 01:38:31 Wait, I didn't even see him leave. He got up for the... I think he's just been traveling so much. He needs a day off. Yeah, he's been through hell. Yeah. Cool. Oh. Whoa. it's been a while ah you up for it I'll do it god damn first take I'm forced. Zah, please beat him. All right, Zah.
Starting point is 01:39:07 You want to go up first? Che, you're second. Individual or? Individual. He always has to ask a question. What is the most basic thing we could say and he'll still have a question? Yeah. Always a question. What is the most basic thing we could say, and he'll still have a question? Yeah. There's always a question.
Starting point is 01:39:29 It would have to just be a yes or no. Let's see. Jay, do you have a pick tonight? Gambling pick? Oh, my God. He can't. He can't. He can't.
Starting point is 01:39:38 It's impossible. The epitome. Oh, my God. That was the easiest one ever. That was a layup. That was the easiest one ever. For those who layup. That was the easiest one ever. For those who didn't hear it, Chase, a gambling pick? Run it back, run it back.
Starting point is 01:39:50 What's another easy question? Jay, do you like your new house? Jay. This is impossible. You liking the new house? Okay. What'd you eat today? For lunch? that's crazy how would that change your answer holy shit it could have been breakfast but that was so
Starting point is 01:40:16 about 90 percent of the time he'll come back with a question yeah you just have to go yes or no with him oh all right gauntlet sponsored by omaha steaks today with father's day right around the corner what do you give to the man who has everything easy you give him an experience he'll never forget you give him omaha steaks father's day experts at omaha steaks have made it easy to put a smile on the big guy's face this summer with hand-selected gift packages starting at just 89 with omaha steaks the possibilities are endless endless flavor endless variety endless value truly they have perfected more than steak and Starting at just $89. With Omaha Steaks, the possibilities are endless. Endless flavor. Endless variety. Endless value. Truly, they have perfected more than steak.
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Starting point is 01:41:26 Come on Za. Knock it in. Knock it in. Alright he knows. That was a fucking awesome shot. Soccer guy. Ah. Okay, okay. Lotta.
Starting point is 01:41:55 Jay being helpful. Oh. Oh! Finish! Header! Header! Has anyone ever got it on a header? No.
Starting point is 01:42:05 There it is. No, no, no. No, no. Let's get ready for the rugby throw. Oh, the baseball switched up. Zod's got a bat on him. Yeah, there it is. Knocked me out of the home run derby.
Starting point is 01:42:23 Second place in the home run derby. Right. Rugby. Oh, close the home run derby. Right. Rigby. Oh, close. When I looked at the strike three. Oh, yes. Oh, you've been on quite the cold streak. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:42:34 Ever since I started. Nice. You were killing it roof ball, though. I know. I didn't get. I could throw a football. Yeah, you had a. Oh, that was right there.
Starting point is 01:42:45 I thought you were going to win there for a second. Mook, how's the baseball team doing? We got a game tonight. I think we're 4-1. Nice. 4-2. You're batting like 800. Yeah, I've gotten out three times this year.
Starting point is 01:43:01 There you go. There it is. There it is. I have my high school musical moment tonight I have a softball game Then I'm going straight to a spot at Soho House Oh wow Nice and early
Starting point is 01:43:14 Soho House Nice Right here You're at two minutes Seven cities in the UK With population over 900k London, Birmingham Right here, right here, right here, right here. You're at two minutes. We can help you. Seven cities in the UK with population over 900K. London, Birmingham, Manchester, Liverpool. Yes.
Starting point is 01:43:36 Fucking what's the capital? Birmingham. You said that right? Yeah, Edinburgh. Fuck. Fucking Dublin. 13 most Hearts Spades
Starting point is 01:43:51 Clubs Hearts, spades, clubs Fucking diamonds 13 most common types of stone fruits I don't know what stone fruits are Blue helmets The bills Cowboys 13 most common types of stone fruits. I don't know what stone fruits are. I don't know what the hell that is. Blue helmets. The Bills.
Starting point is 01:44:08 Yeah. Cowboys. Yeah. There's our white, I guess. Cowboys. Bills. Oh, wait. Hold on.
Starting point is 01:44:13 Titans. Yeah. Tennessee Titans. Fuck. Who else wears a blue? Five breeds of dogs with the best show. Who's the leading thing? Poodle.
Starting point is 01:44:24 Poodle. Yes. Yes. Ohoodle. Yes. Wow. Fucking crushed it, Zah. Holy shit. Fuck it. Wait, you beat your previous time by like five minutes? You crushed that, Zah.
Starting point is 01:44:36 He's got to be in the top ten? No. Wow. Three minutes. Bless you. Bless you. Thank you. Bless you. Thank you. Sneeze. 304, Steven.
Starting point is 01:44:56 Zahn, page one. Is this page one? I think so, right? Damn. It's on page one. Who's the bump from page one Kandon Walker did
Starting point is 01:45:08 I forgot about that that's sneakily one of the great runs Kandon Walker in a recycling can oh yeah Kandon Walker
Starting point is 01:45:18 yeah three minute run impressive work right there with Torkelson not saying much anymore I guess he'll be back
Starting point is 01:45:31 he's in Toledo yeah alright are you ready Che? let me just put the time up a little. Ready, Che? TJ, are we ready? Three, two. Not ready. Not ready.
Starting point is 01:46:05 What? No. what no Steven what are your favorite type of shoes basketball shoes so good at it he's so good at it he's so good at it maybe that's what we're supposed to do with his prompts
Starting point is 01:46:23 it's just like it's uncanny just ask a question back to him Maybe that's what we're supposed to do with his prompts. Yeah. It's just like it's uncanny. Just ask a question back to him. Maybe that's what he wants. It's unbelievable. What's your favorite food? Probably wings. That was a question.
Starting point is 01:46:45 That was a question. Is it probably wings, question mark? Yeah, I was a question. That was a question. Is it probably wings question mark? Yeah, it had a question mark. Who's your favorite athlete? Larry Johnson. There we go. He knew that. Okay.
Starting point is 01:46:57 All right. Ready? Yeah. Three, two, one, go. Oh, he's fucked. Terrible. Good bounds, Mook. Oh my god.
Starting point is 01:47:23 Oh, god. Oh wow! Plugged the hole. 30 seconds already. Nice save. I want Malice to hook him. Oh nice! Oh no. he's going all ceiling all ceiling stupid knee down strategy
Starting point is 01:48:00 got it he's got a great time he's good he's got a great time oh oh no oh oh my god oh air ball city i think zon's got him. I don't know. See how the Sporkle... Steve, there's a sports section in Sporkle. It has to be Buccaneers. Oh, it's Zaw.
Starting point is 01:48:36 Zaw, I think you might have him. I think you might have him, Zaw. Oh, he's getting cocky. I think you might have him, Zaw. Oh, my God you might have them so Horrendous Right now sit bucket on that one. Oh my god. Oh Nothing but that good shot right Oh my god. Woo! Yeah. Another Minette. Good shot. All right. Swish that.
Starting point is 01:49:07 Ah, fuck. We're all just icing them out. Fuck, who's Emily Blunt? NBA players. Kobe Bryant. Michael Jordan. Shaquille O'Neal. Dwayne Wade.
Starting point is 01:49:29 Wade. O'Neal. Got it. Oh. LeBron James. Stolen cars. Fuck. Weather.
Starting point is 01:49:46 Humidity. Shit. Reading Railroad. R-E-D-D-I-N-G. Might be Reading Railroad. And it's wrong. Shit. Go to jail.
Starting point is 01:50:01 Five. Five NFL teams. Free parking. Orange. Free parking. Two, one. It's over. Five NFL teams. Orange parking. Orange. Free parking. Two, one. It's over. Five NFL teams. Orange is the primary color.
Starting point is 01:50:09 Oh, primary? Cleveland Browns. Cincinnati Bengals. Primary. Broncos. There you go. Time. Not a bad time at all.
Starting point is 01:50:27 And look, we have our Omaha steak. Show it oh that looks oh my god that's all for za oh look at that's uh that's a beautiful one that's uh that's most not kicked your ass steven he did that was a poor showing great great showing by za too yeah what happened with the shot there? Oh, yeah. The first shot when you transition from football to basketball is very difficult. But what about the other, like, 20 shots? I lifted today.
Starting point is 01:50:52 Give me a break. Oh, spicy. Would you consider, like, a recreational sport? Like, consider what? There it is. There it is. Playing it? Like, playing one?
Starting point is 01:51:04 What sport? Any. Yeah, I guess any. Like Mook plays softball in a league. I don't play any recreational sports, technically. Okay. Would you consider? Oh, I see what you're saying.
Starting point is 01:51:19 You're asking me to play something? No. Oh, my God. I feel like that's something you would be interested in. Yeah, certainly. Yeah. Yeah, cool. Thanks, guys. something no i'm oh my god is that i feel like that's something you would be interested in yeah certainly yeah yeah cool yeah thanks guys why was that so hard i think we found the root of the frustration yeah that's exactly what it is his brain is just wired so different we gotta just one day we just gotta got to see how long we can go. Just asking questions that end up in questions.
Starting point is 01:51:48 Are we bad conversationalists? No, like answer. No, no. Kyle, ask me the recreational sports question. That beat me down. Would you consider doing like a recreational sport? Yeah, for sure. Tim.
Starting point is 01:52:07 All right, TJ, spin the wheel. Maybe you handled that well. Pretty open-ended question, I feel. No. Please like and subscribe. Again, thank you to everyone. The numbers have been crazy. We appreciate it.
Starting point is 01:52:17 Donnie's bringing you ice cream. Sometimes, Stephen, open-ended questions are by design, and it's for you, the receiver of the question, to take it wherever you want to take it. Sounds like the origin of my prep sheet. I'm not going to do anything open-ended. I'll tell you that right now. He's got a speed.
Starting point is 01:52:34 I wasn't even trying to... Spin the wheel just so we know what we're dealing with. Oh, nice. What we're dealing with We Gucci He's got ice cream for us I love a nice cold treat Ice cream Oh bought Dippin' Dots yesterday I hate them Really
Starting point is 01:53:07 What do you mean you bought I go rainbow How did they sell them I take my son to 7-Eleven after T-Ball And he picked out Dippin' Dots A 7-Eleven brand though Yeah
Starting point is 01:53:18 Not the Well it was like a It was like a refrigerator It was just Dippin' Dots Did he like them Not really It wasn't like He liked them But the kids dipping dots. Did he like them? Not really. It wasn't like he liked them, but the kids liked everything. It wasn't like, I want that again.
Starting point is 01:53:29 Oh, no. Yeah. It's a wrap. Is Wrigley still doing the oat ice cream? Yeah, that fucking sucks. That's all they have? I haven't seen any other. It's actually like the most maddening thing ever.
Starting point is 01:53:41 No, it's upsetting. I don't hate it, but I also, as I'm eating it, I'm just like. It can't be the only option. I wish it was real ice cream, yeah. Yeah. But in a pinch it'll do, but unfortunately. That's the end of like America. Oat ice cream is the only thing offered.
Starting point is 01:53:59 Oh. Oh boy. Hell yeah. Donnie. Oh sweet, so this is made with Stella Blue. I love coffee ice cream. Thank you Donnie. Oh fuck yeah.
Starting point is 01:54:12 Thank you. That's so good. Handmade. I wish Brandon were here. Tastes like a Heath bar. Like a coffee Heath bar. Thank you Donnie. Remember Brandon? Thank you. Remember that guy? Dude that's so good. Do we have an ice cream maker in the office? Cool.
Starting point is 01:54:29 That's exciting. Thanks, man. That's really good. Thank you. Thank you. That dark roast cold brew in the store now. People are loving it. We have it every day here.
Starting point is 01:54:50 Oh. We don't have brandy oh oh my wow wow that's that's almost impossible to do yeah every vote mattered wow all right that's the act well can I say something really quick? Yeah. I just, I don't want to get serious, but a lot of people... No, stop. Go, go, go. We're really upset with you yesterday for the way things went. I don't want to overkill it.
Starting point is 01:55:15 I don't want to... I don't want to run something into the ground. Or paint, paint. I just want to formally apologize again about that. That's the second time. Hey, thanks, guys. I'm sorry, everybody. I won't do that again.
Starting point is 01:55:43 It's the act

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