The Yak - Frank The Tank Goes For The #GiannisChallenge | The Yak 7-22-21
Episode Date: July 23, 2021Shaq, Giannis, Tank.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. I love don't call in. We don't have callers.
We have the ability to have callers.
You just got fucking embarrassed.
I asked you a question about your shoes.
I said I like your shoes.
Then I asked you if they were mids or highs.
And then you said they're the 11s.
They're not.
I believe I asked you if they were the 11s.
Those are 11s.
They're the 11s, right?
Yes, they are.
Oh, awesome.
You know, we got the food of champions today.
Okay, so.
Happy Tank Thursday.
Happy Tank Thursday.
What's that in the bottom right?
Uh-uh.
Get it out.
Get it out.
So take your.
That's a good show.
Who did that?
That sounded like you broke the microphone.
That sounded like a real butthole.
Hundreds of people watching.
Who did that?
Do it again.
Ew. All right, so frank the tank is going to take thursday he's going to eat 50 chicken nuggets and drink wait before you start
and frank's eating all of them you're gonna drink both of those
i can probably but probably not going to yak i see i'll see how one of them I think you have to try.
Let me run you through it, Frank.
I couldn't order half a Sprite, half a lemonade, so I got one of each, and I figured you could
do a dual straw, and you only have to have half of each.
You mean they didn't do it?
What's wrong with them?
I know.
I'm sorry.
Don't you think they're getting asked to do it?
Yeah, that's Chick-fil-A's biggest complaint about them.
All right, so Frank, Chick-fil-A doesn't really play by the rules.
Frank, the only thing I would ask is
no talking with your mouth full.
All righty.
For the people at home.
But if you're ready to go,
do we have any guesses for how long?
Wait, wait, I missed this whole...
So Giannis yesterday...
Yeah, Giannis yesterday...
I know that.
Okay.
Frank, you're not a challenge eater or a glutton by any means.
Nope.
But you know what?
I figured since I tried the lemonade mixed Sprite yesterday, and it was delicious.
I don't know why this KFC Chick-fil-A didn't do it this time.
I guess they were pissed that too many people ordered it.
Yeah, Owen will do it for you.
You got to finish the whole drink.
So is Sprite and lemonade that he mixed?
Yeah.
I also like that this is now
the Giannis challenge when he went to Chick-fil-A.
Don't eat any.
When he went to Chick-fil-A
with I think his family in his car
and got 50 chicken nuggets.
I don't think he ate all of them.
But either way.
50 chicken minis he got, which is a breakfast item.
If he ate all of them, he would have advertised that.
Correct.
He would have publicized that.
Frank, you're not going to eat all these, and you're not going to enjoy this,
and I don't want to see you even more upset than your baseline is.
Well, he's happy today.
PFT tried.
Did he not?
Yeah, I think he failed.
I think he will enjoy it.
I don't think he'll enjoy the aftermath.
I don't think so.
I think he'll enjoy the process.
He will not enjoy the process.
I would like to chip in.
What is that?
Someone, some rap scallion on the internet trapped Frank's voice inside of a pickle.
That is your voice.
That is Frank inside of a pickle.
How is the technology?
I've never yodeled like that before.
Did you dress like a pickle today on purpose?
No, it's a Florida Gulf Coast.
No, it's the Fighting Irish.
Well, the shirt is, but the problem is the whole ensemble.
Yeah.
I figured I'd match my pickle.
Yep, there it is.
I'm going to take that pickle away if you keep doing it.
Thank you, Frank.
Take the pickle.
No, he just relinquished the pickle.
I like that.
Frank is like a man after my heart where it's like you can't physically stop yourself, so you're going to have to throw it away.
That was the most dad I've ever seen you.
I had to.
I could just see it coming. Hold on. Hold you. I had to. I could just see it coming.
Hold on.
Hold on.
Don't start.
I could just see it.
Everyone's like, dude, tank Thursday is great except for that goddamn pickle.
I'd argue that that's a cucumber.
I think he's right.
That's a cucumber.
It is a cucumber.
But you do realize that a –
Sit on this real quick.
It feels like a cucumber.
You realize that a pickle is a pickled cucumber.
What?
Yeah, but that one, that is not a pickled cucumber.
That's in the cucumber state.
What do you mean by that?
Pickles are cucumbers.
Was this in a jar?
No, it was just sent in an envelope like you would a cucumber.
That was sent to me.
Alright, so Frank, are you ready? Yes, I am.
Alright, so what are the guesses for time?
Well, we'll see. I think I might be able to do all 50 in an
hour. He can't do 50 in an hour.
I know you. I know you
too well. I'm a Frank cat. You can't finish
50. So this is just a yes or no question.
You cannot finish 50.
Well, we'll see how I can do. If you finish 50...
Do 30, give me 10.
No. Do 20, give me
10 as well. I have 10 outside
if you want. I do. Let's break those open.
Because I ordered 60. I do want that.
No, don't give it to him. What, they didn't even do to 50?
I ordered
230. You didn't order 50?
So you've had your fingers on all these
nuggets. Most of them.
You have to check and make sure.
That's true.
They feel good.
All right, Frank, you ready to go?
Wait, wait, do we do guesses?
Very hard to be in a room with Chick-fil-A chicken.
It's just a yes or no.
It's not a time-sensitive manner.
It's the matter of you can't finish 50.
He has 50 minutes.
I say yes.
I don't think yes or no.
I think we say how many he eats.
Okay.
All right.
So just so the record's set, it's 155 is fingers down.
Yes.
155 fingers down.
I'm going to say he's going to eat all of them.
I concur.
32.
I love you, Frank, to death.
Let's go, Sass.
But that's a lot of food.
That is a lot of food.
I'm going to go lower.
I'm going to go 28.
PFT of 36 last night.
Right.
Are you hungry, Frank?
I'm hungry enough.
There he is, 50.
Whenever someone asks me that, I'm always hungry.
Hungry enough.
I could always eat.
Right, but did you have a big breakfast or any lunch yet at all?
You know, I typically don't eat breakfast.
Okay, all right. Sorry.
What's the most mentally excruciating challenge you've ever accomplished?
Don't say watching a Mets game.
Is it a Mets?
Mentally excruciating challenge.
Not saying Kevin Harlan's name on an NFL Sunday.
Probably.
25.
All right.
Let's do it, Frank.
Let's go.
Sas, what was your guess?
I said all of them.
So it's 25 a box.
You were anti.
You didn't think he was going to get all of them.
There's 20 and one.
Well, I wanted to get some of them.
Oh, there you go.
You were playing the same game.
Do we know which one's which?
He's starting off too fast.
He's sprinting.
It's a marathon, not a sprint, baby.
I like that we have the timer because it's going to be like 45 minutes.
Just hang out.
It's perfect.
Just the guys together.
All right, so Frank, you just work on that.
We'll start talking.
He just needs to have one nugget a minute.
Can Sas go Chick-fil-A with me later?
Me and him?
No.
Just the two of us?
No.
No.
No, no, no.
I'm on a cleanse.
Weren't you supposed to take Owen to Cracker Barrel?
That was years ago.
Did you guys go?
Yeah.
Years ago.
Yeah.
KB, what's your shirt today?
Grateful Dead.
You're just doing
Mouth Horns today exclusively?
Yeah, I think so.
It's bootleg.
I like it.
It's not official.
It's not bootleg.
Yeah, it is.
I bet it's liquid blue.
It was at a little shop.
I bought it at a Provincetown shop
in front of a boy
who knew me
and I was in...
I was wearing no shorts or pants.
We bought...
We went to Provincetown and wore Speedos.
And KB bumped into a little boy fan and all of his family.
How little was the boy?
Can you cut Frank's mic while he's eating?
Much larger than me, but he had his dad and mom with him.
And sister.
And sister.
We're just going to keep Frank's mic off for right now just because he's working.
We need a symbol if you need to say something,
Frank.
Maybe a counter to say
a tip of the cap when you swallow
your pickle. Maybe a pickle.
Is this two? No, a pickle would be too quiet.
I can do this.
Okay, yeah, that's perfect.
Just tried to reinvent
the wheel and Frank had the answer.
So what's up, boys? Shout out
Stephen Che released his final top ten NFL players. What's the point of the timer? Just tried to reinvent the wheel, and Frank had the answer. So what's up, boys? Shout out Stephen Shea.
Released his final top ten NFL players.
What's the point of the timer?
Timer is just to see.
It's just fun.
We should be keeping track of the quantity of nuggets he eats instead.
It's actually a great litmus test because if you just tune in out of nowhere,
you're probably like, what's going on here?
I got to stay for the time.
I apologize, Owen.
Shout out to Stephen Shea for finishing his top 100 list.
Thank you.
Tom Brady number one?
Oh, yeah.
That makes no sense.
None whatsoever.
Why?
Because he's not. He's your number.
Like, if you could start a franchise right now, he's your number one player.
For this one season, yes.
No chance.
No chance.
That's just not.
No, no, no.
That's not.
No.
No.
He dropped him into a 7-9 team, won the Super Bowl with him.
No, though.
Patrick Mahomes would have won the Super Bowl with more ease.
We'll see what he does this year.
He's got a reworked offensive line.
You just can't possibly believe that.
That can't possibly.
Of course I do.
I literally saw it come to fruition.
That's just not.
But that's just not.
But again, if you were drafting from scratch, you don't start with tom brady this year you would start with my homes and build around that correct
i mean we saw no we didn't we saw the bucks be a really good team and tom brady was a very good
quarterback but my homes this year you wouldn't pick brady over my home everyone wouldn't the
top three quarterbacks or rogers or rogers the top three quarterbacks brady rogers and the homes
are all super close.
You can really put them in any order you want.
Brady has the track record of winning.
I'd rather take that.
And he also is 43 years old with a fucking knee injury.
I would flip the top three.
Yeah, I would too.
I'd actually put Aaron Donald before him.
Bro, Brady's the fucking goat.
Frank's got his hand up.
Prediction.
This is the year.
Brady.
Balls off a club. Declines. Safe prediction. This is the year Brady falls off a cliff.
Declines.
Safe prediction.
What number are you on?
I don't know.
I'm in the first box still.
Are you still enjoying it?
First box is 20 or 30. The first box is always the best box, bro.
Frank, did the first box look a little empty?
A little bit.
So probably that's the 20 box.
That's the 20 box.
You got to do the 30 first.
Are you using no sauce?
No sauce. There's no $20. You got to do the $30 first. Are you using no sauce? No sauce.
It's raw dog in it.
There's no sauce here.
No sauce here.
No sauce in this place.
You asked for no sauce.
Right.
Don't use sauce.
Yeah, he doesn't.
He's a sauiceless guy.
What was the last sauce you had?
Maybe one time I'll do a little bit of barbecue sauce, but no sauce.
The Polynesian sauce is delicious.
You love mayonnaise.
Also, it's crazy.
I hate mayonnaise.
Mayonnaise is food intolerant. That's true. It's crazy. I hate mayonnaise. Mayonnaise is food-fraud.
It's crazy the one thing you put sauce on is steaks.
I don't put sauce on steak.
I use butter.
I watch you make a prime rib with the sauce.
That's prime rib.
That's gravy.
All right, stop talking, Frank.
Keep eating.
We're slowing you down.
Any intestinal issues right now?
Are you good?
It's early, Kyle.
You're being too cautious with Frank.
No, I want to know where he is.
You want to put your ear up to his old belly?
Steven, you're very mean to Sean Kemp on this prep sheet.
I mean, everybody's mean to Sean Kemp on the internet last night.
Would you take Sean Kemp's life, incredible NBA player, dunked on everyone,
became an alcoholic while playing, got fat, could not dunk towards
end of career. Would you take Sean Kent's life?
It makes it sound like you'd murder him.
Would you take his life? I think you have to add
how many kids he... Didn't he have a famous amount of kids?
He's got a lot of kids.
Would you put him out of his misery?
Interesting,
when he went on the road,
every day was Father's Day because
he had a son in every town.
Ah, nice.
That's probably what I would do.
We'll keep that off the DVD.
Why wouldn't you take his life?
Yes.
Of course he would take his life.
He went through a lot of hardships.
After being a millionaire athlete at the top of his profession, just having an incredible 20s.
Does it take his life from the start? Or does it take his life now?
I don't know if I'd take his life now.
His whole life.
You're Sean Kemp from birth to now.
It says incredible NBA player.
Yeah, then I would.
I would.
Do you know how cool it was to be Sean Kemp in 1993?
Sean Kemp, I'm pretty sure, does not have money right now.
Yeah, if I trade my life with him right now,
I don't think I'd take that.
Yeah.
I probably would trade with him right now. It's't think I'd take that. Yeah. I probably would trade with him right now.
It's not a real option.
We can't do this.
Technology's getting there.
We're a few years away.
You get to duck on Alton Lister and point at him?
I do not want to go to space.
Is that a double point, that is?
I have no interest in space.
My favorite was when he dapped up the guy that he dunked on.
Chris Gatling, maybe?
Yeah.
Yes. Yes.
Okay.
Nice pull, Chris Gatling.
Good pull.
The Gatman.
Get the Gat.
What was that?
The first bullet point on this list is he made $107 million.
Yeah, but then he lost that, too.
How the fuck do you do that?
But Sean Kemp was one of the top stars in basketball for a three-and-a-thousander. Yeah, but how do you lose $107 million. $107 million. Yeah, but then he lost that too. How the fuck do you do that? But Sean Kemp was one of the top stars in basketball for a three-to-thousander.
Yeah, but how do you lose $107 million?
Dude, a lot of these guys.
You spend it all.
That's whatever amount of time that is, that is the most fun a human can have.
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
$107 million.
It's like Antoine Walker.
Antoine Walker blew $100 million in like a decade.
His was blown like the year after he stopped playing.
Yeah, it's like, yeah, I had a lot of fun.
But like, too much fun.
You could have fun, the same amount of fun with like $2 million in a year.
You could also just put away like $10 million and be like, just don't ever let me touch this.
I have $90 million to play around with.
But when you get through with the $97 million, you don't have the restraint to protect the other $10 million.
I would basically give myself a trust fund. It's like, you're not allowed to touch this $97 million, you don't have the restraint to protect the other $10 million. I would basically give myself a trust fund.
It's like you're not allowed to touch this $10 million until you're 50.
Actually, he probably wasn't paying for anything.
He was famous.
I would at least hope he paid off a house and has a house to live in.
Antoine Walker for sure.
I know someone who – Antoine Walker married her cousin, and apparently he paid for literally everything.
To not even with her, but like out with friends, out with people he barely knew. He paid for literally everything. To not even with her, but out with friends,
out with people he barely knew, he'd pay for everything.
I'd do that when I go out with the sass.
I'd do that when I go out with sass, too.
You pay for him?
I would do that.
The first two months I was in New York,
KB paid for literally every single thing I did.
He's grooming you.
And he would just refuse to let me pay.
Yeah, that is grooming.
That's not grooming.
That's exactly what grooming is.
I'd be like, I'll Venmo you, and he'd be like, no, no, come on. Yeah, that is grooming. That's exactly what grooming is. I'll Venmo you and he'll be like, no, no, come on.
Yeah, I'm grooming you.
That's not fucking grooming. That's chaperoning.
It's parenting, chaperoning,
but not grooming.
That isn't my type.
Not his type. Really?
What's your type?
Someone more squeezable?
He's too caust, caustic.
Yeah.
That leg.
That leg just keeps moving.
Which one of you fucks in here is my type?
I'd say you go for Frank.
Nah, I think I'd go with you.
Really?
You're safe.
Okay.
Is Big Cat a bear?
We should get gay patent here?
Big Cat's obviously a bear.
Yeah.
Well, you never know.
I'm an otter.
KB, you're just not fuckable in the gay community.
That is not true.
No one would go near you.
That is historically not true.
There is loads of evidence.
I'm throwing the flag with reluctance, but I have to throw it.
Fleming?
You about done with that box?
Frank, how was the drink?
The drink is good.
Not as good as the one yesterday.
You got a lot of chicken in your throat.
I can hear it.
Not as good as the one yesterday.
The other one was mixed a little bit better.
Okay.
You got a lot of crumbs on the old shirt.
That's okay.
That's okay.
You'll work on it later.
Oh, no.
He's hurting.
It's like you don't clean up the kitchen halfway through the meal.
You wait until the end.
Exactly true.
Yep.
His pace is incredible.
We're nine minutes in.
He's almost done with the box.
Well, that's the light box.
Yeah, but still 20. He's halfway through.
Yeah, he's 40% done in nine minutes.
Again, it's not about time.
Okay, not just the side of the box.
That's a frail box.
It is.
Chick-fil-A needs to step it up.
I also, this is where it's going to get hard.
It's going to get hard in the last 20.
Oh, yeah.
I said he's going to do it, though.
I don't think it happens.
The man is literally wearing an Olympic.
I mean, he is.
The pace is probably too fast.
No, it's not happening.
He's eating extra crumbs.
Look at him.
He doesn't even have
to be eating these things.
Frank, you lunatic.
It's happening.
No, he's getting too giddy.
When Frank gets the giggles,
he loses his appetite.
This is a great side piece
of just like a picture
in a picture of Frank
just eating things.
Long haul, Frank.
Long haul eating challenges.
All right.
One buck 20 down.
You tore that box up.
You know what?
For the listeners, let's hear how those nuggets sound.
Let's hear how they sound for Big Cat.
That's Chick-fil-A.
It's a tender nugget.
Don't they give out like boxes of condoms usually in the Olympics?
Yes
And then this year they have the beds
Cardboard beds
Anti-sex beds, yeah
The Olympics are going to suck this year
I don't think they're going to happen
Well, I didn't get the invite
The approval
Yeah, well, I tried
You did
I appreciate that
You fumbled the bag
Yeah
Frank? This is going to be the clusterfuck games Well, I tried. You did. I appreciate that. You fumbled the bag. Yeah.
Frank?
This is going to be the clusterfuck games.
I mean, it's going to be a major clusterfuck.
There are already people getting the vid in the village.
The vid?
The vid.
I've never heard that. The vid is actually. The vid in the village.
All right, back to the nuggets.
30 more.
Oh, that's a full ass box.
I mean, he took the full ass box.
Oh, Frank, buddy.
I told you he did the wrong box first.
Staring down a 30 piece after crushing 20.
Where are the 10?
Where are the 10?
Yeah, where are the 10?
On my desk.
You want them?
Yeah, I'll take them.
I've got theirs and 100% chance they're gone. Everybody here is a vulture are the 10? On my desk. You want them? Yeah, I'll take them. Let's get those out of here. There's a 100% chance they're gone.
Everybody here is a vulture.
You don't have a desk, do you?
We do live in a vulture society.
Yeah, they're gone.
So gone.
No, they're not.
I think they're still there.
Yeah, me too.
I'm staying hopeful.
They're gone like my baseball and my...
Oh, it was your buds.
Yeah.
I like that.
We only get the second half of the jokes.
How about the player who, I don't know much about this,
but the player who blocked you and then Jack tried to kill you.
Trevor May?
Strowman.
Strowman.
Yeah.
He actually liked to tweet this.
He said I should be in the same asylum.
Oh, they're gone.
Really?
Nick, good call.
That's ridiculous.
Nick ate the nuggets.
I ate the nuggets.
Great call.
Gone.
Gone.
That's such an asshole move.
You can't trust anything in this office.
No.
There's nothing.
Who just eats someone else's food off of their desk?
There are no rules.
Owen doesn't have a desk.
Owen left them on somebody else's desk.
And they were like, oh, okay, this is just up to them.
Yeah, I mean, if I walked back and there was ten nuggets on my desk, I'd eat them.
Just on a plate?
Yeah.
I'd take one, walking by.
For sure.
Couldn't hurt.
That riled me up.
I'd like a desk.
I can tell you're about to fucking burst.
Can we get Owen a desk?
Yeah.
Yeah, I don't know why we...
Owen, can I say something?
Wait, there's definitely people who don't use your desk.
I wouldn't say this.
I've been protecting this area.
The desk across from me is unclaimed.
No, it is claimed.
It is claimed.
Somebody used it.
They're just not there.
They're just not here.
Claimed is the wrong choice of words.
It is very claimed.
They cleaned his stuff out and they got rid of his stuff.
Okay?
No, no.
Trust me.
It's Rick's desk.
I'm not ready yet.
It's not here.
I'm not ready.
Owen, you can have Rick's desk. I'm not ready yet. He's not here. I'm not ready. Oh, and you can have Rick's desk.
Perfect.
Nick.
I'll text Sam.
He sits across from me, not you.
You get vibs.
You're using the word stuff liberally.
They're items.
Yeah.
And gear.
Just because it's not tangible doesn't mean it's not there.
I sat across from his fucking autographed US Open flags and head covers.
He had that folded up like it was just like a crumpled up homework.
It was the autographed flag of the match with Tiger, Phil, Brady, and Mickelson.
Brady and Mickelson, yeah.
Which Phil and Mickelson both signed it.
No, all four.
There were four signatures.
Mickelson.
Who was the other one in that first match?
It wasn't Rodgers.
Peyton Manning.
No.
It was Peyton. it was Peyton.
It was Peyton.
Did you say Phil Ivey?
Yeah.
Phil Ivey, yes, also signed it.
He did, yeah, for some reason.
It goes Ivey, Hellsmuth, Moneymaker.
Raymer and Mencius. I wish I could pull one more poker player.
Raymer.
What about the Fossil Man?
I'm not thinking of him.
Doyle Brunson.
What about Christian Carter? Brunson was the old guy. Doyle Brunson. What about Christian Harder?
Doyle Brunson was the old guy.
He's got to be dead.
He's got to be dead.
I don't think he's dead.
Christian Harder.
Did he die?
Doyle Brunson.
He was the old one.
Yeah, Doyle Brunson is very much dead.
He was old 40 years ago.
So dead.
That dude's been dead forever.
He might not be.
But he was old forever.
I think he's just old.
I believe he's alive.
So fucking dead.
So dead.
No, I don't.
Maybe not.
Did he wear a cowboy hat or am I thinking of Richard Petty?
Richard Petty.
Dora Brunson is a retired American poker player.
He's alive.
He is 87 years old and he is very alive.
Dead.
You can't be 87 and very alive.
I'm sorry.
Unless you were like.
If you're Dora Brunson, you can't.
No.
One of those like four, nine women in Italy who are like, I'm 110.
Brandon, I wouldn't consider you very alive.
I drink wine every day.
I'm quite alive.
No, you're not.
You're very alive.
Half dead.
You're half dead.
Not even.
All right, what adjective would you put in front of alive for me?
Somewhat alive?
Ish.
No, I don't think you're sort of.
You don't even get an adjective.
Sort of alive.
You're alive.
Alive-ish. But if you had like a cast, like if you broke your arm, then you'd think you're sort of. You don't even get magic. You're alive. Alive-ish.
But if you had a cast, if you broke your arm, then you'd go down a little bit.
You're a non-mortal wound.
Yeah, you're for sure. Closer to death.
Because you're definitely an infection guy.
You'd break your arm.
You'd sprain your wrist and be like, well, I'm not an infection.
You're going to die of typhus.
That would be the downhill stuff.
One thing opens the door.
I think I'm fine.
I'm alive.
Oh, Frank.
I was reading a story this week.
Okay.
Let me just finish.
Still has his wits about him.
I don't like this.
I think you raised your hand a little too quick.
Not drunk on chicken yet.
About this guy who threw the first ever fastball in baseball.
Wait, what? Shouldn't the first guy ever picked up a baseball be the first ever fastball in baseball. Wait, what?
Shouldn't the first guy ever picked up a baseball be the first guy?
Whoever threw it, that's the fastest that was thrown.
They were underhanded at the time.
And he was controversial.
It was before they even had Major League Baseball.
It was like 1850-something.
He's just throwing rocks.
I love him being controversial.
And the guy's from Brooklyn.
And he's playing baseball. And he came's from Brooklyn, and he's playing baseball.
And he came up to bat.
He swung a bat, hit a home run, and on his swing suffered internal injuries and died.
Whoa.
This doesn't.
Damn.
I forgot the guy's name.
And what does that have to do with the fastball?
The guy was somewhat alive.
The opponent was throwing him a fastball.
He was 21 and he was playing baseball.
That's when they died back then.
Yeah.
And he died because he swung a bat and burst his appendix.
He would have died in the Civil War anyway.
That's a good point.
The fans at those games back then would bring
handguns.
They would duel.
I think we should
set up one of these days
we should do a paintball duel.
I like that. I hate that.
I agree as well.
We should pick different people
in the office to duel.
No, we shouldn't tell them. We should just shoot people in the office to duel. No, we shouldn't tell them.
Settle grievances.
We should just shoot people with paintballs.
No.
Let me finish.
Shooting people by a paintball in the office would be like the most.
That happened in the old office.
Really?
Yeah.
And we do the paintball duel in Weehawken, New Jersey.
Okay, so you're just asking us to come over.
He doesn't know the lore.
Well, don't you know Weehawken, New Jersey?
I'll send you the best stool scenes.
The spot of the
Hamilton Burr do.
Ah.
Now I do.
And that's what we do.
We create the
Hamilton Burr.
We find out who's
Hamilton and who's Burr.
Do you think if you got
shot point blank
in the head with a paintball gun
it could like severely
fuck you up?
Yes.
Yes it can.
No.
Getting shot by a paintball hurts.
It doesn't outweigh the thrill of shooting someone else.
I never understood paintball.
Our boy Bo got blinded in one eye.
He loved it, though.
He went out passionate.
I went to Airsoft.
No, it was Greg.
Geez, Greg Armstrong.
Going playing paintball in a paintball place is awesome.
Interchangeable humans.
Yeah.
We used to play every weekend.
You didn't have a...
I had a tip and an idea.
I would put like 10 players on my friends with Duel,
and we would both just stand behind a tree thousands of feet away,
and no one would hit either one because we were afraid of pain.
That's like a step up from like Airsoft Wars when you're younger,
and it's just like the bullets are just blowing in the wind.
You turn Frank's mic off real quick.
They're not even going close to hitting anybody.
I went to one for a birthday party and all the other kids were like really into it and
were like dressed like Call of Duty and stuff.
Yeah.
And this one kid had an airsoft grenade.
Oh, yeah.
I remember that.
And he threw it up and it just landed like right next to me and I just got 300 pellets
to my ass.
That's awesome.
Two foot grenade. When I played paintball, I went for like my fifth grade birthday and I just got 300 pellets to my ass. That's awesome. Two foot.
When I played paintball,
I went for like my fifth grade birthday and I went with like a couple of friends and my dad
and there was like grown men there
in like the full like military uniform,
like backpack.
Love it.
And I remember we were like hiding in this like bunker
because it's like a whole like fake setup
and this guy comes up
and he's just like holding us hostage.
He's like if
you guys he's like if you guys surrender right now i won't blast you and we had to like walk
out with our hands up and him following us grown men and we're all like 10 years old
painted bamboo shoots on your toenails
paint chips under your fingernails and also someone someone did shoot my, someone shot my dad
in like the warm up thing.
Like we were like all going out,
like walking out
with like our
constructor or whatever.
Instructor.
Instructor.
Instructor.
And some guy,
some guy was like leaning down
and my dad was tanning
so he just shot my dad
right in the face.
And the guy got like kicked out.
Jesus Christ.
Bunch of,
like it's like crazy people go there.
Now, Sass, did that guy have a white panel van?
You know him?
I mean, that sounds like the beginning.
Is that Ralph?
That sounds like the beginning of a story of just like the creepiest man on the face of the planet.
Can we get a box update?
You know what?
How many do you got?
Show the box.
Oh, you're doing okay.
Speaking of paintball, you know what the worst,
the best idea, worst execution is laser tag.
Oh, yeah.
It's so bad.
Did you ever have the at-home laser tag guns?
Yeah, it's terrible.
No, those were awesome.
No, no, the ones that you go to an arena and you have the full vest on stink.
But those still just break off.
You don't even know when you're hitting something.
You don't find out until the end.
It's for children.
It's for young children.
No, but we're saying we would like to enjoy it.
Yeah, as an adult, I've never played laser tag and been like, man, that was fun.
It's like, eh.
I disagree.
I think I have. i think laser tech's fun
no because you don't know if you're hitting anyone you don't know yeah your gun lights up
or something yeah yeah it's also like every time you go to a laser tag place you run around it you
do one lap and you're like all right so there's like three corners in this whole thing yeah then
you just hide or then you just find a spot and just suck i do remember about it though like pizza
and soda tastes so much better when you get like
a quarter of a slice and two ounces of coke.
What's that have to do with laser?
Explain.
Fuck. Explain.
The first curveball was thrown by Owen.
They get like a pizza
pie and like a two liter soda and split
it in like a 25 person birthday party.
That is not a laser tag thing.
That is a poor birthday.
Your friends and parents didn't want to spend money.
No, no.
That's what the Q's are in Malvern was known for.
You can, you can, you decide how much pizza you're ordering.
Like my son's birthday party, I ordered 10 pizzas for like four people.
It was a stupid thing.
You ordered 10 pizzas.
That's why he can't order 10 pizzas.
You multiply the salary by 20.
I never had pizza at my birthday.
We were waiting to crick.
When's your birthday?
I had a pizza hut and didn't have pizza.
How many people were at your son's birthday
that needed 10 pizzas?
I have a problem.
My biggest fear in life is not having enough for everyone.
He orders 10 of anything whenever you want.
Ever.
If you told me to do...
Don't do that.
If you told me to do, like, get Chick-fil-A for us right now, we'd all end up with, like,
100 nuggets.
Yeah, you'd spend $300.
Yeah.
But would someone with a much lower salary than you be able to act on that fear?
What do you mean?
Would they be able to get on that fear what do you mean that would they be no i had this no 20 times the amount of 20 times the amount i used to do it with with with
beer like in college like we just have way too much because like what what if you run out of beer
yeah we would just get more beer cheaper version dude you're so it was the worst beer possible
running out of beer was a thrill though oh it's the worst i think it was fun worst beer possible Running out of beer was a thrill though
Oh it's the worst
I think it was fun
In Wisconsin the liquor stores would close at 9pm
You feel like you accomplish something and then you have a new mission
Yeah
Yeah running out of beer is more fun than drinking beer
Yeah
My friends would never let me drink it but I would always have to run out and get more
It was the best
I used to just go
You were the guy we sent
Fellas we done? I'm wasted always have to run out and get more. It was the best. I love those motherfuckers. You were the guy we sent.
Fellas, we done?
I'm racing.
Brother, let me get you a cold one.
There's a good question on here.
What's the worst body part a guy could have?
Pussy.
It's a vagina.
Yo, you're an awful dude.
You have a pussy.
Do you have the worst pussy?
Your pussy stinks.
Good question, Che.
Good question.
Thank you. Frank showing the box.
Oh, you only got like 15 left.
How are you feeling?
He's slowing down.
He's slowing down bad.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
He might be duping us.
We found the only way to silence Frank.
I think I'm getting close to the wall.
Yes.
You've got this, Frank.
You know, you could take, theoretically,
like a five or ten minute break.
You could take a twenty minute break.
You can't do any of that.
You could take a break and then the last fifteen minutes just hammer it again.
That's how long it takes for you to realize you're full.
Yeah, right.
Six, nine,
twelve, fifteen. I'm at thirty-five.
You just counted your nuggets in threes.
35 down, 15.
He did.
Baller.
That's how you count nuggets.
Shay, I didn't see your text about grabbing the prep sheets.
My bad.
All good, buddy.
Oh.
I'd like to shout out.
Buddy always hurts.
Can I shout out Stephen Shay? I was gone for two weeks. My grandmother died. All good, buddy. Oh. Buddy always hurts. Can I shout out Stephen
Shea? I was gone for two weeks. My grandmother
died. Stephen Shea went to... Enough about
your grandmother. Jesus Christ,
dude. Get over this. Can we play the sad horn
noise that we had?
Run that back. Another show
here about your dead grandmother.
Shout out Stephen Shea for going to... You never
brought her up when she was alive.
30 minutes.
30 minutes to my house three times to feed my cat Fluffy.
He did it for me and I appreciate it.
Is that real?
I was thanking him.
You were gone for a week and you could just lay out food bowls.
Cats are smart.
No.
No.
Yes.
Not Fluffy.
That's a borderline abandoning a cat at that point.
No problem.
Don't cats run away for like a month straight?
Yeah.
My cat Piper would just
run away. We'd lose him, he'd come back.
You're a good human being.
You got it. Your cat was hungry
when I came over.
That sounded horny.
That sounded very sexual.
Your cat was hungry.
Don't worry, I fed it up.
We left out quite the appetite.
He's so full, he's only
speaking in onomatopoeia.
Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow.
Your cat was hungry when I came over.
Hey, buddy.
Daddy had the food.
Daddy filled up your cat.
Luckily, Che brought some snackies.
Daddy's not home.
Che will have to fill up your cat.
That poor hungry, hungry cat.
That pussy was starving.
That pussy was aching for some food.
He got to 36, right?
What?
He got to 36.
You just beat him?
It's not about beating him.
That's 36 right now.
That sounded like 36.
You're on pace to finish a couple times.
Pete's walked by about four times today.
He once called in.
Did he get his bisectomy reversed?
Is that why?
It was a big burp.
Big burp.
Pete has yet to hire a female.
Yeah.
I noticed that.
People are talking about it.
Said he can't help himself.
Couldn't control himself around them.
Just wants some little boys.
And I've heard there's been some interviews.
They've all been white.
They haven't made it through.
White males.
Interesting.
Yeah, we should totally judge him for that.
He's responsible for Colby leaving.
That's a fact.
Colby's still on the text chain.
So is Dana.
What are you guys going to do this weekend?
Are you going to go to the Jersey Shore?
Are people going? I saw a suitcase
in the office. They're already on their way.
Balls is packed up,
ready to go. What a life. Doesn't have a clue
what's in his suitcase, though.
It's probably just high noon.
Yeah.
Frank.
You know, next week I'm going to be on the road.
Oh, really? Where are you going?
Next week.
Where are you going?
Oh, it's the National Card Show.
In Chicago.
Yep.
National Card Show. Did you say card show or car show?
Card.
Card.
Basic car show.
Yes.
Are you driving to Chicago?
No, Doug's is.
I'm driving to Chicago next week.
Oh, really?
For what?
Really?
What are you doing?
I'm going to a concert with my friends, but I might see you there.
I'm so serious. I know you friends, but I might see you there. I'm so serious.
I know you are.
That's why I love you.
See, I know where we're going.
I know we're going.
No, he's not going to Lollapalooza.
I'm actually not going to Lollapalooza.
You're going to a concert concurrent with Lollapalooza?
Are you going to fly back?
I didn't know it was Lollapalooza.
I bought these a while ago.
Lollapalooza sucks, bro.
Is it like a punk rock festival? Remember when Ninja was just playing Fortnite at Lollapalooza. I bought these a while ago. Got it. Oh, Lolla sucks, bro. Oh, is it like a punk rock festival?
Remember when Ninja was just playing Fortnite at Lollapalooza?
Okay, Lolla doesn't suck.
I know.
He just didn't have the right experience.
I know we're going with Aria, so.
Yep.
Aria should be here.
You're going to go to a Cubs game?
I'm going to get you hooked up?
Yep.
Maybe get you to throw the first pitch out?
Yo, if you need anything at Wrigley, talk to me and Big Cat.
We'll get you set up.
And Sass, I'm never going to help Sass ever again.
Big Cat, I literally invited you
to a Yankees game
and you laughed in my face.
I'm going to get made fun of if I help him.
You laughed in my face.
No.
No.
We're going to start going,
I think on Tuesday night,
Tuesday we're going to start our trip
and we'll see how it goes
and it should be a fun, interesting week.
Yeah.
That's going to be great.
You guys bringing a camera guy?
Yeah, Aria.
Aria.
I'm very jealous of that.
I've always wanted to go there.
You don't know anyone's name here behind the camera.
I know Aria.
I do know Aria.
What's he look like?
He has a white patch in his beard.
Oh, that's fucked up.
Jesus.
Wait, what?
You got burned by acid.
That is not Aria.
I know Aria. Okay, I was going to get the wrong person. I swear to God, I could go pick Aria. I know Aria.
Okay, I was getting the wrong person.
I swear to God, I could go pick him out.
Go pick him out.
Is the Chicago office in the city?
Yeah, it's close to Wrigley.
I'm coming with you, Owen, by the way.
Like a good neighbor.
Do you actually want to?
Yes.
Chicago office is there.
Chicago.
No, when are you leaving?
Thursday at midnight.
When's the concert?
So Wednesday?
No, Thursday at midnight.
No, Thursday at midnight.
So Friday.
Friday morning.
Why are you leaving at midnight?
So again, when's the concert?
Well, you wouldn't have to drive.
You could sleep.
Why are you driving?
I don't do well in cars.
I have a friend who likes to drive.
It's probably the same amount of money.
You're the one driving, though. drive. It's probably the same amount of money. You're the one driving, though.
No.
It's probably not.
If you have multiple people,
plane tickets are expensive as fuck right now.
How many people are going?
Ironically, the one who likes to drive,
he just got accepted.
He's becoming a pilot for JetBlue.
Damn.
Won't be seeing me.
Definitely not
Wanted to say congratulations
To him
Well JetBlue is
You've met him
That's the
I like all your friends
JetBlue is like
Is the lowest rung
Yeah there's some statistic
That it's like 70%
Of JetBlue flights go down
Yeah it is
70%
Yeah
Your friend
That's why the flights
Are so expensive
Because they have no planes anymore
Yeah they're all crumpled up
70%
Go to a Mets game
With my dad tomorrow
Bought him a ticket
For Father's Day
Whoa
Father's Day was like
A month ago
Yeah but he
Yeah I got him tickets
On Father's Day
Blue Jays
How do you say that
Blue Jays
Blue Jays
Bo Bichette
Yup
Keep going Vladimir Guerrero Jr. That's it That's itays. Bo Bichette. Yep. Keep going.
Vladimir Guerrero Jr.
That's it.
That's it?
I know Bo Bichette.
I know Dante's son.
You get one more son.
One more son.
I love watching him hit homers.
There's another son.
Yes.
Give me a hand on the father.
In the woods?
He was an astro.
He was an astro.
Biggio.
Yep.
Cabin Biggio.
I think they have four sons.
Is there a fourth son?
Actually, I think you're right.
Their entire roster is.
That's true.
I guess that's technically their entire roster.
You're so right.
Speaking of, son of boy, dad.
What about it?
I was on it.
Whoa, Big Cat, we weren't saying that.
I was not on it.
Well, what, the merch?
You usually promote it. Any chance you get. Well, yeah, but then last time Big Cat got mad at me when I did that. I did not get it. What, the merch? You usually promote it.
But then last time Big Cat got mad at me when I did that.
I did not get mad at you.
Yeah, you did.
What?
You were like...
I don't remember.
He just clowned you.
Yeah, he clowned me.
It made me feel like a fool.
It made me feel like a damn fool.
That's the nature of the clown.
A clown is the fool.
Do you think anytime anyone clowns on this show, they're mad?
Oh, yeah.
Literally all we ever do.
It's the angriest show on earth.
Everyone's always pissed off.
We are all angry.
Damn, they hate Dana.
Well.
Rico.
How many is he down?
He's close.
It's game over.
I'm at 40.
40.
40. Oh, he's good. Rico, game over. I'm at 40. 40.
40.
Oh, he's good.
Rico, thanks for the follow on Twitter yesterday.
Whoa.
Sass is a scout.
No, I'm not.
He is.
My biggest fans are riders.
All right.
Yeah.
We didn't cross paths.
I saw all of you.
I think you know what it was.
Talk in the mic, will you?
I thought I followed you because I see all your shit because it gets bumped.
Like, people...
It's like, oh,
I'm always on the timeline.
KB liked this.
Brandon liked this.
Yeah.
I thought you were already...
Brandon's never liked one of my jokes.
Also, a hundred and...
Oh, what do you got?
Half a quarter of a million?
You didn't really need the one.
Nah.
That's...
Accumulative.
Oh, I was being serious.
I appreciate the follow-up.
Thanks, bro.
All right. All right, Rico.
Better not be a scale.
That wasn't your heart, by the way.
You went across to the other side of your chest.
It was an inside thing we do.
Men keep their emotions right next to the heart, not in it.
No, just right outside of the heart.
Just in this vacant area over here.
There's literally nothing here.
Is it easy, Frank?
Do you think I'm that easy?
Talk in the mic.
He's struggling.
You're going to take him down easy, Frank?
He finished the first 20 in nine minutes.
He's got this so easily.
How are you feeling?
The last nine are going to be the hardest nine.
Okay.
Back nine.
All right.
But I've done 41.
Let's announce each one before you start it.
Say the president that accompanies that number for each nugget.
It's a fun game.
Well, it would be easy now.
Yeah.
Who did you just eat?
That would be George H.W. Bush.
Yeah, you scarfed him down.
Wait, no, no, no.
I thought the ninth.
This should be president number nine.
The ninth president.
Oh, no, no, no. 42nd. Oh, no, we're doing the I thought the ninth. It should be president number nine. It's the ninth president. Oh, no, no, no.
42nd.
Oh, no, we're doing the ninth to the first.
No.
Okay.
He's on 42.
No, but we don't get to 50.
Are you just eating the presidents you feel deserve to be eaten?
No, eat nine to one.
Ninth president.
Nine to one.
Oh, okay.
I can't do ninth president.
What are we on, Adams?
He's hurting his brain thinking about it.
Think. John Tyler.
Millmore, Miller, Phil, Ward.
Garfield.
I feel like it's Harris and Tyler.
You're not going to eat Franklin Pierce's, are you?
Well, Franklin Pierce is 14.
Okay.
Well, there you go.
What about eight, nine?
Thomas.
We're probably back in the slave owners here.
Might be Thomas.
Thomas Crown Affair.
Washington.
Well, Franklin Pierce was a,
was basically,
his policies were
so bad that he basically led the way
to the Civil War.
Oh, good for him.
I mean, people could,
Franklin.
I have it.
W-H-H.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, that...
The shortest president.
See?
He died.
Yeah, he got ill.
That bitch died 30 days.
He wasn't assassinated.
What an ugly-looking fella.
He got sick at his inauguration, right?
You should do political stand-up, just pretending you're an AT-40.
He gave the longest political inaugural address in the cold, rainy day.
Then that bitch ass died.
Of New Mongia, yes.
What an idiot.
That's good.
Who's plucking?
Well, actually, Owen started it, believe it or not.
No.
You don't have to be good.
I mean, we're getting close to John Tyler and Andrew.
Save it till you eat it.
Tell us which president tastes the best.
What?
Which president's tasting the best, Frank?
I don't know.
I'm at the point now where it's a struggle, and my brain is slowing down.
Bart Van Buren coming up.
Frank, you're definitely going to fall asleep after this.
MVP.
Oh, he's giddy as fuck.
Fleming's a giggle puss right now, isn't he?
Everything's tickling you pink.
Zooted.
Is this MVB?
Yes, it is.
All right.
Become glutton, Frank.
I don't want to be sure he's clear of these stories.
Clear the door.
What's going on here?
I think... What's happening?
This is how he gets drunk, yeah.
He's legitimately wasted.
Is he crying?
Is he crying?
Oh, no.
He's crashing.
He's crashing.
Oh, no.
Come on, Frank.
The emotions are just...
He's like a toddler.
...pouring out of him.
Like a pregnant woman.
What were the numbers again?
You're at seven, right?
I don't know.
What are you at, seven?
You're at Andrew Jackson.
I'm at 42. So... Yeah, what are you at, 7? You're at Andrew Jackson I'm at 42
So
8
Robinson
Just count the nuggets you got left
That's the number you're on
I got 50, 28, 50, 50, 32, and 25
What are the numbers?
Is it lost?
Is it like a loss?
4, 8, 15, 32
Oh, those are the guesses
That's what I thought Frank was asking for
Oh, got it
So, who picked over 40? I did I picked 50 8, 15, 32. Oh, those are the guesses. That's what I thought Frank was asking for. Oh, got it.
So who picked over 40?
I did.
I picked 50.
I said you were going to complete.
Sass and I are just kind of on the same wavelength.
Big Cat Owen and Sass 50.
We're linked up.
Yes, Owen too.
We're all synced up.
Sass, me, and Owen.
Next closest is Nick with 32. Do you like the boy dad graphic I made with you and Sass
as the host
yeah I thought it was
disrespectful to Roan
I'm surprised no one
picked into 40s
but then again
that's kind of Sass's MO
just being mean
to everyone
what
I treat Roan
with nothing but respect
you are mean to him
no I'm not
you are
you are
you are
no you are
no you are
what's this no you are when I had the no you are you are what's this you are
when i had the boys over for a sleepover uh sask looked at me he was like did you hear about like
that shit that happened at penn state i was like yeah buddy yeah i was watching one of roan's rap
battles and they were talking about and i looked it up and i was like i never knew about this i
was probably like 10 years old at the time.
You should have known about that when you were 10 years old.
What?
Why should I know about that?
It sounds like you've buried it.
My parents were going to sit me down and be like,
hey, there was a rapist at Penn State.
That was the biggest story in the country for a while.
For a 10-year-old boy.
All the 10-year-olds were talking about it.
My parents sat me down for every rape.
That was the age you should have learned about it.
There was a rape.
You need to know about that. That was the age you should have learned about it. You need to know about that.
That was the most prominent age for that
lesson. When to tell your
son he's fuckable.
Hey son, listen, you're gonna probably get a
full scholarship, but not to Penn State.
Have you ever heard of Larry Nassar? No.
That's recent.
Who was it? I mean, if I heard of him.
Michigan State. All time.
Name your three favorite rapists.
Jesus Christ.
No?
Clip that.
Jesus.
Clip that.
Jesus was?
Whoa, Frank.
Frank, are you taking a break?
I think he's tapping.
No.
No, you can't give up.
Yes, he can.
It's fine.
Just tap.
Just tap.
You can always give up.
What's the upside?
I think the drink is going to make it worse.
Don't commit this crime.
The drink is gone.
Can we get him more drink?
That might help.
What was?
More drink.
More drink.
Owen, can we get him more drink?
What would you like to drink?
What's available?
Wasn't there more of that?
We're doing a sketch.
Isn't there a sketch we just wrote about Frank goes to a diner?
Water and body armor.
We have water, body armor.
What did you do with the half of that?
I threw it out.
I think there's Birch beers at the new Amsterdam bar.
That must be something to try for a soda review.
I will say that.
I'll get you something that I think you'll like.
What's available?
You tell me.
In the booth, Zah just had his first Cherry Coke ever.
Ooh, Zah, thoughts?
Welcome.
Not that great.
It's incredible.
Not that great.
Oh, no, Zah.
How could you, Zah?
You're a Cherry Coke fan?
I love Cherry Coke.
So I think I was expecting more of the traditional Coke taste,
and the cherry aspect is throwing me off.
Am I crazy, or is Cherry Vanilla Coke a thing, too?
Yeah.
That's very good.
That's very good.
You're not crazy, brother.
Just the straight vanilla.
No, I think the Cherry Vanilla Coke's the best. The not crazy Just the straight vanilla No I think the cherry
Vanilla Coke's the best
Orange Vanilla Coke too
I've never seen
I've never seen that
They have cherry vanilla
Dr. Pepper as well
It's one of those ones
Where you get it
When you go to Five Guys
But isn't cherry and vanilla
One of the 23 flavors
In Dr. Pepper
Correct
Then why would
They accentuate it more I guess
Don't get me started
You hate Dr. Pepper
Go off on Dr. Pepper
I don't like Dr. Pepper
I'm a Pibman
You are a Pibman You know I'm not A big Dr. Pepper. Go off on Pepper. I don't like Dr. Pepper. I'm a Pippman. You are a Pippman.
You know, I'm not a big Dr. Pepper guy. Really?
Yeah. Okay, write it
down. I like Dr. Pepper, but only the
Dr. Pepper for men. Dr. Pepper tastes like poor people's
birthday parties. I like that it's not for women.
Yeah, only the men one.
Every once in a while I'll see a lesbian
drinking it. Well, isn't men
implied because it's a doctor?
No, there's doctor number four men.
Nurse Pepper.
Nurse Practitioner Pepper.
Flight Attendant Pepper.
Dental Hygienist Pepper.
Yeah.
You know, diet sodas, when they first came out, had issues because men wouldn't drink it because a lot of commercials, they seemed aimed at women.
And they thought you were a softy if you drank.
Yeah.
What are those?
What did you get him?
None of those look softies.
I don't know.
They're all sodas.
They're like homemade sodas.
Put them back.
I said put them back.
Those motherfuckers back.
Get the fuck out of here.
Put them back.
Send it back.
Those were actually for taste reviews. Can I put them back. I said put them back. Put those motherfuckers back. Get the fuck out of here. Put them back. Send it back. Those are actually for taste reviews.
Can I put them back in a few minutes?
Yeah.
No, right fucking now.
Wait, but you still haven't quenched his thirst.
You've got to go get him a drink.
Is the only carbonated drink water or body armor?
Body armor.
If you get the fruit punch one, it'll probably be the best.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, those are actually reserved for taste tests
Oh, and how could you?
You thought those were just in there and he didn't know about it?
How could you?
Have you ever had a problem putting your sodas in the community fridge and somebody taking them?
Yes, I had
Did you find out who did it?
No, someone took the Brooklyn soda we were going to try on the Brooklyn Bridge
Frank, you have six minutes left, how many nuggets?
Damn When I was younger Six? oh can you get it going it's gonna be tough come on frank power through just put them all in your mouth right now
and that way it's just whenever you happen to swallow them by accident or whatnot
when i was in high school me me and my friends, one of my
buddies worked at this sports store, and his
boss brewed a bunch of...
He made his own beer, and the
labels of them
were just pictures of his
family members, and one of them was
one of his kids in the bathtub and shit.
What? Just on printer paper,
and it was taped around, and he gave them all to
my friend, and he gave him like 30 of them.
And so for like – we were like juniors in high school.
So for like a month, we would just sit there drinking these beers with like some random dude's baby in a bathtub on them.
Or like his grandma or his wife.
How'd it taste?
That sounds very weird.
I know.
I just thought of that because of those sodas.
It looked like they were like homemade sodas.
Frank, eat it.
Eat one.
Six left.
Eat one, Frank.
Was your friend named Sandusky?
No.
He gets it now.
He gets it now.
He has no idea.
I do.
Oh, yeah?
Penn State coach, yeah.
We need to just take a little time out of every day to tell you about some atrocities.
Yeah. You ever hear about Waco? We need to just take a little time out of every day to tell you about some atrocities.
You ever hear about Waco?
I have, yes.
What about R. Kelly?
Yes.
Oklahoma City bombing?
Yeah, these aren't like... That's like way different.
Oklahoma City bombing was a terrorist attack.
I would argue.
Well, it wasn't.
It was an inside job.
Oh, very.
Very.
Domestic terrorism.
Yes, sir.
I actually watched a documentary about that.
Kobe Bryant.
No.
The Triangle Short East Fire.
Mm-hmm.
I actually don't know that one.
Happened in this neighborhood.
Started unions in America.
Goddamn liberal bastards.
Don't even get me fucking started.
And you know they were sipping on
apple cider vinegar the whole time.
The whole time.
Five, let's go.
You have less than five minutes.
Five John Adams.
John Adams has been, it seems like
he's been the president a lot.
I think he was two and five.
He's on some fuck shit.
This is Quincy Adams. He's on some fuck shit. Quincy.
This is Quincy Adams, right?
Frank, I think you're acting.
I think you're fine as a... I think he's drumming up
a little...
Fine and dandy.
I think you're good.
Yeah.
It's going to be tough.
He's running down the clock
for a buzzer beater.
He wants the buzzer beater.
He wants the glory
and I don't blame him.
That's a good...
That'd be a good clip.
Okay.
I did at least 45. Yeah, you did. That'd be a good clip. Hey, I did at least 45.
Yeah, you did.
It's a lot of chicken.
You probably should have stopped a long time ago.
45, Seth's favorite.
I mean, I'm going to turn into a chicken.
Whoa, that sounds like.
That would be.
Oh, well, no, it's not as good as.
I thought that was your Berman.
So we're just waiting on the nuggets?
Yeah, I think so, yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think we are.
That's a rooster, though.
You don't need to eat
You don't need to eat
Chick-fil-A is hen only
Really?
I used to talk to the birds in my backyard
You ever eat a rooster Brandon?
No I'd let my dog out
How would you know if you're
How would you know if the chicken you're eating is rooster or hen?
White meat
Frank how many you got left?
Five
Four
Alright let's go Not bad Four minutes actually Chop chop Three minutes White meat. Frank, how many you got left? Five. Four.
All right, let's go.
Not bad.
Four minutes.
Actually, three minutes.
Yeah, yeah.
Three minutes.
We said 55.
Yeah, but that's not.
No, it's at 155.
You got two minutes.
I'm not going to do it.
No, come on. What the hell?
Frank, give up at 49.
Frank, you're right there.
I'm full.
You're full.
I mean, it's tough going with number 47 here.
They're expanding in your stomach.
Yeah, like I was eating off of each other.
I mean, it's getting hard to get down the throat.
You're going to be shitting out feathers tomorrow, Frank.
Maybe a beak.
Yeah.
You ever shit out a beak, Brandon?
Oh, yeah.
I mean, 47 is impressive, guys. It is. Und a beak, Brandon? Oh, yeah. I mean, 47's
impressive, guys.
It is.
Undeniably.
I'm proud of you.
You know what's
more impressive?
Knowing when to quit.
It's like that
social network line.
I mean, you guys should,
some of you guys
should have bet it
in the 40s.
I mean, going from
25...
Don't spin this on us.
You gotta finish
the challenge or not.
It's binary.
It's binary.
Some people in here don't want you to finish
the challenge, believe it or not.
I just think there's more respect
in knowing when to fold them.
I want you to be a Loggins, not a Kenny Rogers.
You gotta know when to hold them, know when to fold them, brother.
Why would you want to be a Loggins instead of a Rogers?
Why? You'd of course want to be a Rogers.
No way. I'd want to be a Loggins. You'd want to be a Rogers.
Absolutely not.
Oh.
Oh.
Do I get Messina with my Loggins?
No.
What?
Fuck off.
I don't get Dolly Parton with my Rodgers.
Absolutely not.
You're a Loftin.
Have you ever checked in to see what condition your condition was in?
Mario Vasquette.
Jim Tomey.
Have you ever checked in to see what condition your condition was in?
No.
Why?
It's a song.
Oh, that's my bad.
And it's a song by who?
Crystal Waters.
Either Loggins or Rodgers.
The who?
Rodgers.
Okay.
Oh.
I'm at 48.
Throw in the towel.
Throw in the towel.
Frank, come on.
R.I.P
You got this Frank
Don't give up
Don't ever give up
Jimmy V said that
He's dead though
Until what
Yeah he gave up
This is Frank Cam
For the last two
Come on Frank
Don't do it Frank
Come on Frank Sometimes don't Don't do it, Frank. Come on, Frank.
Sometimes to win, you got to be something that you're not.
Competent.
Frank.
It is competent.
This is going to shoot you with an arrow.
Don't take no abuse.
If you don't finish.
What is that?
I bet you regret eating those crispies.
He can't even speak.
Big mistake eating the crispies
in the last box.
You were running up the score on the crispies.
49.
Oh no.
Come on, Fred.
He's eating it like a Twizzler
he's just picking
on the cards
he's eating it
strand by strand
you read it
why
what is it
no you read it
no you read it
read it Sass
I already did all my
motivational quotes
Sass read it
if you're gonna fight
if you're going to fight,
fight like you're the third monkey on the ramp to Noah's Ark.
And brother, it's starting to rain.
Come on, Frank.
Throw in the towel.
49 is a lot of nuggets.
That is a lot.
It's 50!
Oh!
Oh, man.
A bite?
In another bite?
Oh, he's gnawing.
In another bite?
You're playing with us, Frank.
He can't do it.
49 and a half.
That's okay.
That's a lot. That's so much. That's so much. Chin up. 49 and a half That's okay That's a lot That's so much
That's so much
Chin up
49 and a half
Wait a minute
Chew
Oh wait that was 40
Oh yeah
Where's the other 10
Empty
Fleming
He did it
Let's give him
What a show
Take Thursday
No take Thursday
Next week
So way to go off
Good work
Give this man
His pickle back
Here's your pickle
Give the man
His damn pickle
Did someone say nickelback?
You know how they got
Their nickname nickelback
They charged five cents
For the first concert
And at the end
Everyone wanted
Their nickelback
Alright
That's our show
It's all Frank KB I sent her the first concert, and at the end, everyone wanted their nickel back. All right. That's our show.
It's all Frank.
KB broke the pickle.
You broke the pickle, Kyle.
I sat on my fat ass.
That's so sad. Oh, my God.
That is so depressing.
KB, you broke his pickle.
You broke his pickle off.
A little something for me, a little something for you.
Here we go.
A little something for me, a little something for you. Here we go.
I wish somebody could light that pickle on fire with a flaming arrow.
I suppose I could.
Greg, hold it up.
Hold the target up.
No, the pickle.
Pickle's going down. Pickle with a flaming arrow.
A direct hit. We'll be right back. Thank you.