The Yak - It's Officially Christmas Special Eve | The Yak 12-21-23
Episode Date: December 21, 2023Shoutout everyoneYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up.
Hello.
Welcome in.
Does that go to the TV?
Can we turn on the TV?
Kyle unplugged that?
Kyle's just standing with a plug in his hand.
It's a live wire.
I don't know what that would have been plugged into. Walk in dude i just dropped it walk away walk away what's up everyone uh
roback.com promo code yak 20 off your first purchase q-zips polos hoodies joggers shorts
roback.com promo code yak 20 off we got a very special guest here today yes thank you nick terrani is here
nick terrani's here uh no we have aaron right aaron wait sit back yeah put put the uh sit back
put on the headphones hang out aaron won he was second place in the talent contest. How did you... So you came second?
Yeah.
It was a beatboxer, girl.
Like, honestly, if I lost to anybody,
I would rather it be her because she was good as fuck.
What was your talent?
I was rapping.
He delivered no instrumental.
So where's she at?
She has a flight.
She's going to come in another time.
She didn't expect to win.
No, I think she came to win.
Was she a good beatboxer?
I mean, I'm not a...
Yeah, I guess you should have judged that instead of me.
I'm just glad I'm here right now, bro.
Like I was telling you, I watch the Yak every day, so it's like...
I love that.
Crazy, bro.
Yeah.
So, yeah, welcome in.
And your rap name is Palmer?
Yeah, that's my last name.
So Aaron Palmer, you know, a lot of people called me Palmer growing up, you know,
because there was a lot of Aarons in my class and shit, you feel me?
So I'm going to go by my last name.
But, yeah, I've been rapping for about 10 years, you know.
I found out about Barstool from Gilly and Wallo.
Shout out to them.
Yeah, I was watching them.
Little gateway drug.
Right.
It was like a rabbit hole.
I went down a Barstool rabbit hole one weekend.
I'm like, oh, yeah, I like this shit.
It's cool.
Fuck yes.
What's up?
Do you have any thoughts on your name?
Like, as far as, did you ever consider changing it to something a little spicier?
Like Lil something? I had a couple of names, but to something a little spicier? Like, Lil something?
I had a couple of names, but they was already taken.
Like, Master P, you know.
Yeah, that one's pretty famous.
Master P, I'm like, damn, I can't go by that.
I was going to call myself Trick Daddy, but, you know,
somebody already got that name, too.
Yup, Trick Daddy.
You thought of all the good names, though.
Yeah, I'm like, damn, bro.
I think those would have worked.
Yeah, but, I mean, legends already got those names.
Like Master P, you feel me?
I wanted that name for sure.
And you're from Cincy, so was Carson Palmer.
I was three.
Like, bro, that was my uncle.
Everybody was like, oh, Carson Palmer, your uncle or something.
Were you a Browns fan?
Yeah.
We already had that discussion.
Born and raised in Cincinnati?
Yeah.
So were you inspired by Slim Jesus?
No, Slim Jesus is actually from Hamilton, which is not Cincinnati.
That's Butler County.
Yeah, I just wanted to put that out there.
Aaron walked in, he was like, I'm a Browns fan.
I tweet at you all the time about your Browns takes.
Perfect.
You tweet me too.
It's funny, bro.
You were like, it's crazy you talking about the Browns like this.
We're the same.
I'm like, we're not the same.
What?
The Bears and the Browns?
Yeah.
You think the Browns are better?
Yeah.
What?
Like right this season?
When was the last time the Bears won a playoff game?
When was the last time the Bears won a playoff game?
He's right.
We won one in 2010.
The Browns won one.
Bro.
Wait, you're crazy right now.
I'm dead ass. Look, being a fan. You think the Browns are one. Like, bro, like – Wait, you're crazy right now. I'm dead ass.
Look, being a –
You think the Browns are a better franchise overall than the Bears?
In the social media era.
I mean, we did come back from expansion too.
Like, we had to start from where –
That's fact.
People from the streets.
Right, but –
Like, bro, honestly, think about it, bro.
I'm not –
Like, you know, I like Justin Fields.
Shout out to him.
But, like, no, the Bears, like –
But this is – I'm just saying, you said we're the I like Justin Fields. Shout out to him. But, like, no, the Bears, like. But this is, yeah.
I'm just saying, you said we're the same, I think.
We are.
But we're trending upwards and the Bears are trending, like.
But you know how it works.
You could be trending upwards.
I'm a Bulls fan, so I feel like the Bears and the Bulls are in similar spaces right now.
But you could be trending upward for a year, but that doesn't mean your franchise has changed.
Yeah, but, I mean, I'm just talking about trajectory right now.
The Bears look like they don't know what the fuck they're about to do in the future.
And the Browns, I feel like you were saying the coach should be coach of the year.
I think that Stefanski got a good argument.
TJ, get the clip, the Vince McMahon trip clip.
Which one?
Come on out, you rapist.
Come on out, you rapist.
That's who your quarterback is.
Bro, I don't know about that.
Don't speak on that.
I'm one person.
I believe that, you know, everybody is innocent until proven guilty.
You know, the court said he was innocent.
So, I mean, right there, I'm not a lawyer.
That's crazy.
Ride or die.
I do.
I probably remember, like, because I'm a big believer In like
Fans
Can talk shit
But like
Browns and Bears fans
We gotta have each other's back
Cause we get the shit talked
Like
But like
I feel like
There's a lot of
Discourse at the bottom
Right now
Cause we been
Yeah we fight over scraps
Lions fans
Come at me
Like bro
I'm like bro
If I was
Like somebody said
The most depressed fan base
Is the Browns But no The Lions were 0 fan base is the Browns, but no.
The Lions were 0-16 before the Browns.
Like, bro, you can't put that on us.
What an argument.
We did it first.
Yeah, we also did it.
Y'all were really bad.
Y'all made Megatron and Barry Sanders retire.
That's true.
I mean, I like the optimism.
Yeah, there's a crabs in the bucket mentality with shitty football.
There's like a belief that Roger Goodell is going to bless one franchise that needs it the optimism. Yeah, there's a crabs in the bucket mentality with shitty foot. There's like a belief that Roger Goodell is going to bless one franchise
that needs it the most, and you guys are all like fighting each other.
Who's the most miserable?
I just want everyone like – I don't believe in like –
people should root for whatever they want.
I hate when someone – when I'll like criticize a quarterback,
they're like, you can't talk.
I'm like, well, actually I can, because I know what bad quarterback play is.
But like the sad franchise is we got to stick together.
You can't, you got,
you get a little new money and you forget who you are.
I just feel like people like,
they don't never want the Browns to be good.
Like I feel like people are still saying,
I like one thing I hate is that Cleveland is Cleveland.
The Browns is the Browns.
Like, no, we're not, we're not the old Browns.
And now we're like, bro, there is the Browns. Like, no, we're not the old Browns now.
We're like, bro, there it is. Yeah, but still.
Even with Joe Flacco, like, I feel like people giving Joe Flacco too much credit.
I mean, I feel like we talking soupy right now.
Honestly.
We talking soupy.
Yeah, I mean.
Honestly.
Yeah, no, I actually disagree.
I like the city of Cleveland, and i want the browns like the
browns being good will be fun it's good for football right and then same for the bears and
they're passionate and like they care a lot and they've seen a lot of shitty football like i want
like that's like what like dallas i don't want dallas to be good fuck that yeah
that cleveland's the perfect team to root for from another yeah right to be like i'm not rooting for
them but like if they're good i'm not gonna be like damn it i don't want yeah shout out to adam rank do y'all have you
ever seen an adam rank video where he was going down a brown schedule like talking about all the
games they were gonna win and lose no he does he was like he was like wrong for like the first 10
weeks so what does he do i can't i can't he's from the nfl network and he so like he got the
schedule he go through every game like oh they're gonna win this game yeah like does he do? I can't conceptualize this. He's from the NFL Network. And he got the schedule. He go through every game like, oh, they're going to win this game.
Yeah.
Does he do this for every team or just every team?
Yeah.
Before the season.
Yeah.
Goes through the schedule of every team and picks a winner or loser.
That's fucking awesome, dude.
I would love to see that.
Like, bro, the first –
I would love to see that.
I was watching a clip like yesterday.
I'm like, yeah, this guy is great.
Look, he missed like the first ten weeks, bro.
And it's like – It's like the most interesting thing I've ever heard. Games Look, he missed like the first 10 weeks, bro.
And it's like – It's like the most interesting thing I've ever heard.
Games day he thought we were going to win, we lost.
And games day he thought we were going to lose, we won.
I'm like, bro, you're just all over the place.
He got tweeted up.
We can take that, Mark.
Oh, I do.
I definitely –
I might do that.
I should do that here.
Just reading schedules?
By the way, I didn't realize today was technically a day off.
Did you guys see that?
Did you guys see that?
I think a lot of people are
TJ was that known?
Yeah
I didn't know that either
Sorry
Sorry guys
I come in every day as long as I don't
Do an extra work
You guys are finally doing that?
Yeah we're going to get around to it
I actually been I always wanted to do this.
I was telling Mook, like, when I do the surrogate episode,
I want to be Brandon Walker.
Oh.
Okay.
He got in the building.
He was like, where is Brandon?
By the way, I was thinking because today is, like, I guess a day off,
and it's a loose yak.
We'll just have some fun.
Yeah, we'd love that.
We need a fun yak.
Do we want...
Do you want to just see if Barstool Barstool will roll up?
I kind of miss him.
We need a bat signal.
He did do the one thing
and I like him a lot
but he came on the yak
last Friday and I think it was
maybe 24 hours before he was
in my DMs asking for a job.
I just ignored it.
Because I knew I'd see him again.
I don't blame him for trying.
Are we going to have random guys
roll up in front of the
guy who is standing out there right now?
Yeah, there's a guy who's sitting outside
of our office who's
asking to be an intern. He's been there
since like 7 a.m. He's still there. Harden. Who's asking to be an intern. He's been there since like 7am.
He's still there. And you know he's
asking to be an intern because it says it on his
sign. Yeah.
Sign that says I want to be.
Just looking to be an intern.
We've kind of invited
this behavior. Yeah I think though we can't
invite him in because it's a bad precedent to
set. Where it's like if you just
sit outside you then get to come on the app. It's better to be like you're just a random guy that
calls yeah that's the way that's a good way yeah so be nice to me please um i made eye contact with
that guy yeah and it was sadder than looking at it like a homeless person on the street i was like
jesus christ i i didn't know what to do so I said, what's up? I said, how you doing?
I said, stick with it, buddy.
I don't know what to do.
Stick with it.
I might humanize him.
Yeah, I was like, how you doing?
Where you from?
I did that.
Y'all didn't talk to him?
I didn't talk to him.
I never even considered treating him like a person.
It was like 7.45 and I hadn't had coffee yet.
I was like, I don't want to have this interaction. He's from here. I don't know what his name is. All right, I'll talk to him when I leave. It was like 7.45 and I hadn't had coffee yet. I was like, I don't want to have this interaction.
He's from here.
I don't know what his name is.
All right,
I'll maybe,
I'll talk to him when I leave.
I just felt bad.
He's watching right now.
You should offer him a job.
I don't,
I mean,
do I have that power?
Offer him a job.
Mootbox.
Yeah.
Hey,
I'll give him a job too.
Can I get a job?
Honestly,
I'm like,
man,
Dave got a lot of money.
Like,
if he just invests in my rap career,
I can make him even richer. Like, bro, let me get like a, one got a lot of money. Like, if he just invests in my rap career, I can make him even richer.
Like, bro, let me get, like, one album deal, 360 deal.
One album deal?
Like, whatever you got to do, man.
Look, Dave, I know you got it.
You know?
Yeah.
Show some love, bro.
I'm trying to get rich, too.
Hey, I need generational wealth for my family.
Who are your rap influences?
Who are the top guys?
Josh Bray?
My, well, like, okay.
Oh, I know.
Fat John.
I actually, nah.
Actually, I'm going to say Kanye West.
That's like my goat, honestly.
Kanye West, you know, and Jay-Z, I feel like they like up here, you know, and then it's
like everybody else.
Benny the Butcher.
I fuck with Benny the Butcher.
Dude, Benny the Butcher's the man.
Yeah, I saw the video y'all did with Benny the Butcher.
I'm like, oh, yeah, that's right.
Dude, coolest guy ever.
The fact that he just
did a song with us.
But he,
hey, if it's about some money,
then I don't see why not.
You feel me?
I understand him.
Benny the Butcher too,
like,
obviously this isn't
breaking news
that a professional rapper
as talented as him
is like so exceptional to watch,
but we did,
PFT and Roan wrote the beat and everything,
set it up.
It takes me,
every time we do one of these songs,
it takes me like an hour to record like three lines
because I'm just terrible with like rhythms and shit.
Benny comes in,
he listens to it twice
and just was like,
all right, I'm good.
And then goes in and just records his verse.
He's like,
and it was like the best thing ever.
Yeah, though, like, that's...
He's in my top five, though.
He's like a legend.
Benny the Butcher.
Vic Mensa, that's a rapper from Chicago.
He's, like, dope, dope as fuck, too.
Do you like Chance?
Yeah, I mean, I'm like, like,
I'm more of a Vic Mensa fan,
but I fuck with Chance, too, you feel me?
Yeah.
I got a list.
Here's the order of my list.
It's in. It goes Reggie,
Jay-Z, Tupac, and Biggie.
You said, wait,
what is this? All-time? Three all-time?
What was the first? Reggie, Jay-Z, Tupac, and
Biggie. Who is Reggie? Andre from
OutKast, Jada Corrupt. Nas.
Nas. And then I don't really know.
I think Ice-T. You fuck with Ice-T?
Ice-T? I would say
he's a goat. He's like a big goat. It was Reg Ice-T? Ice-T? No, I was going to say he's a goat.
He's like a big goat.
It was Reggie, Jay-Z, Tupac, and Biggie.
Andre from OutKast. Rauk, Ash, Jada, Corrupt, Nas, and Man.
That's your list?
Yeah.
What's the –
Who from Corrupt?
I ain't going to lie.
Sometimes I want to hear some sexy red.
You feel me?
Sometimes.
Oh, I love her.
Sexy red.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's mook.
Yeah, I love me some sexy red.
You know, every now and then, you know, it's a time and a place for everything. Yeah. Wait, call Barstool Barstool. Give him a call? Yeah. All right, let love her. That's mook. Yeah, love me some sexy. You know, every now and then, you know, it's a time and a place for everything.
Yeah.
Wait, call Barstool Barstool.
Give him a call?
Yeah.
All right, let's see.
See if he wants to roll up.
He's probably at Bird's Nest, dude.
Probably give him a redemption.
So do you rep Cincinnati?
Like, that's my city?
Yeah, I actually have a Reds tattoo.
I have, like, Mr. Red's leg, but instead of him having a baseball bat, it's a bag of money.
What high school do you go to?
Wait, can I see that?
Yeah.
Colerain, Princeton, Mount Elf. No, you go to? Wait, can I see that? Colerain, Princeton.
No, I went to Euler.
So I don't know if I can see this.
That's a good tattoo.
That's a great tattoo.
Yeah, like.
People from Cincinnati love talking about the high school they went to.
Especially the Catholic.
Actually, like me.
Especially the Catholic.
I could see that.
Yeah, I just never went to like a regular high school.
I went to like virtual schools and shit.
What do you mean what's going on?
Bullshit.
Uh-oh. He got denied. He got his one roll up and now he's retired whoa you know our t-shirt guy welker's uh the head coach of moeller high oh really for soccer like they're like the second
best team in the country wow yeah that checks out yeah moeller they got good sports i know that like
moeller and like elder like cincinnati and like like Ohio in general is big on high school football.
What, are you, do you like Skyline?
I love Skyline, big Skyline guy.
What, how would you say the death of Harambe
affected the city of Cincinnati?
Me personally, like it didn't affect me at all.
But like, I mean.
Did you feel though the city like.
No, I didn't.
Has it trickled over to sports?
Like with a certain moment.
I'm just like, I'm not a big fan. Or not a big high level i don't need the reds never simmons said that once when
for memphis he's like you could just feel the mlk got assassinated 50 years ago
that's happened like if like real world can't like gets injured they're like harambe this is
just like when the gorilla yeah like me i actually do. That's one of those moments like, where were you?
Like, where were you when Harambe?
You know, it was crazy.
Never forget.
The all-time best.
Can you find it?
TJ, the Mike Francesa.
A gorilla?
He kept on saying that.
He called him a gorilla?
A gorilla?
You have to be careful because the guy that took the photo of Harambe,
like the photo that's in every single picture of Harambe ever,
started coming after cease and desisting and suing people that used it.
Like, we got sued over it.
No way.
For putting it on shirts and stuff.
Like, if you put that in graphics now, like, he's coming after and making crazy money off of it.
I love it.
No, Harambe would not have wanted that.
Harambe would not have wanted that.
He took one frame of the photo.
Harambe was not have wanted that. Harambe would not have wanted that. He took one rainbow photo. Harambe was for the people.
The American Dream is doing two seconds of work and then litigating their way into millions of dollars.
Yeah.
I don't know, man.
I feel like if Harambe was here today, he'd be like, no, my picture is public.
Right.
I agree.
It's douchebag behavior, but unfortunately, I think douchebag behavior is American Dream.
No, it's true.
We've incentivized that. Yeah, that's what. It's whoever complains behavior, but unfortunately, I think douchebag behavior is American dream. No, it's true. We've incentivized that.
Yeah, that's what-
It's whoever complains the most gets the most.
Yeah, it's like condo presidents and shit.
Like the dude who everyone just doesn't want to deal with.
He becomes condo president, and then it's like, all right.
It's great when you have one of those people on your side, though.
Yes.
They're the best.
When you have someone advocating for you that's just an annoyance, and you're like, all right,
he'll handle it.
You don't have to do any of the confrontation and bullshit.
HOAs, when they're attacking you, fucking suck, and they're so dumb.
But when they're attacking a contractor, they're like,
you did the roof work wrong.
You're like, yes, he's just going to be on their ass.
We're going to get a refund for all this.
Or if the neighbor's grown their grass out a little too long
walking by it and you're like I wish you would cut that
and then they put a letter on his front door
and you're like I kinda like that the HOA
I would like to do like
it'd be fun to get an HOA like
convention just get the worst people in the world
all together
they really are the presidents of HOAs are the worst people
they're the worst
you have to be a certain type of person who's just like,
yeah, I'm going to spend my entire life
complaining about things that other people do.
What's a position in politics
or an elected position of some sort that isn't the worst?
I feel like every single position fits the criteria
of anybody that wants it is probably a douchebag.
Anything elected.
I feel like maybe local politics.
Who could you point to and be like? Community organizers.
Those guys are cool.
The comptrollers are.
I got a question.
So when do y'all want me to do the high noon at?
You do it right now.
Yeah, you do it right now.
Is it like something?
Yeah. Elephant in the room. I've been waiting for you to say that. You're doing it right now. Yeah, you're doing it right now. Is it like something?
Yeah.
Elephant in the room.
All I know is the – I've been waiting for you to say something.
The oversized lawn games.
I know that part.
I might need to read it.
I just know we got to get that done.
Do you want to freestyle it?
I mean, you know.
I've been waiting my whole life to read that.
Yeah, you know, I want to do the Q-Zip.
Are you waiting outside the office to sign up that says, let me read it.
I want one of them Q-Zips, though, for sure.
Like, the way I talk about them make me just want one.
We're good at what we do.
I have a question for you.
Do you have friends that like Barstool?
No.
That's so funny because I would tell them my mom and them before.
I'm like, so, just to prepare y'all, we're probably going to be, like, the only black people in this establishment.
And like I said, we were, like, probably the only ones besides the people that worked there.
So it was like, yeah, like, it was about what I expected.
Yeah, look, we're, you know, growing.
Yeah, for sure.
I mean, like, personally, I like Barstool myself.
I mean, I don't care who likes it.
Like, I love it.
I love Gillian Wallow.
And like, you know, so if it wasn't for them, I probably wouldn't know about Barstool, I love it. I love Gillian Wallow and like, you know,
so if it wasn't for them,
I probably wouldn't know
about Barstool.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Are you going to do
the High Noon ad?
Yeah,
I need to read it.
Like,
I don't know it.
Right here?
Yeah.
Which one is it?
It's the one.
It says the High Noon.
Bottom of the page.
Oh,
the yellow?
Is it the highlighted yellow?
Right here at the bottom.
Okay.
Give it some twang.
Okay.
All right.
So the High Noon Game Day Pack.
The High Noon Game Day Pack is back.
It includes limited edition faves like pear and cranberry along with black cherry and grapefruit.
Made with real vodka, real juice, 100 calories, gluten-free, and no added sugar. The High Noon Game
Day Pack is a fall exclusive, which
means it's here for a good time and not a long
time. Visit HighNoonSpirits.com
before your next tailgate to find
a pack near you.
They didn't have the
long games. Yeah, that's what
I was looking for. Change the copy on you.
Wait, hit it, though. Give us time to break
out the open. Yeah, like,
bro, i need to
bro i want to do the q-zips bro you want to say you want to read about read a q-zips ad or wear
one i want both i want to do both you feel me bro i always used to visualize like what it would be
like if i was ever on the yak like yesterday i was just watching the stream i was in the chat
i was in the chat yesterday you were in the chat and now i'm on here
barstool barstool luke how are we doing what are you up to are you working no heck no i'm wrapping
presents all right well roll up roll up i'll be there all right yes i love this guy hey did you
find that clip tj Francesa Yeah Hey um
You got an extra copy
Of y'all book around
I wanna get y'all book
I wanna have y'all sign it
We'll make sure you get it
Yeah
For sure
You gotta read it though
I'm gonna read that
On the Greyhound back
Yeah he's a Greyhound guy
Oh
Yeah I caught the Greyhound
Here the other day
Yeah
Love that
So you live in Cincy
Yeah I'm actually
I'm in the process
Of moving to Chicago now.
Oh, okay.
Welcome.
Yeah, man.
I love Chicago.
Can you imagine if that was your child in there?
You're going to have people who are going to say,
wait a second, I'm worried about the gorilla.
Your kid's in there basically maybe seconds from having his head crushed.
We live in a world now where you are going to be more concerned with the gorilla
than you are the little boy.
What's wrong with you people?
They're thinking about him. He fell
into an area where he's
in there with a gorilla
who is dragging him around
the habitat and you're telling me you're worried about
the gorilla's welfare?
What is wrong with you?
That's crazy.
It was so perfect because the whole internet was like, how could you do this?
And his take is correct.
You can't say it.
You got to just roll with the internet.
We lost our sweet prince.
He's a goat.
Oh, man.
A gorilla?
Compilation.
Gorilla.
You're going to say that with a gorilla His son
Harrison just committed to
Fairfield
I think for college
What does that mean
Hold on
Son
Why do we give a fuck
He was here in the summer
Oh that's right
Is he playing something at Fairfield
No
How do you mean he committed?
How do you commit? That's why I did the air quotes for
commit.
He applied there.
He's the only school he has.
I'm a Harrison Francesco.
Where's Fairfield? I have no idea.
In Fairfield.
I know that.
You dropped that like it was like
a big deal. You see National Signing Day
yesterday?
Francesco's son committed to Fairfield.
He was my boy over the summer.
Right, but he's just going to college.
Yeah, he's going to college.
He doesn't even play a sport?
No.
He's the future of radio.
Come on.
That's a big deal in the industry.
That was very confusing.
I get it.
He committed. He committed, yeah. Big sign. National Signing Day. Fairfield gets Francesa. that was very confusing I get it he committed
he committed yeah
big sign
national sign
Fairfield gets Francesco
hey can I say something
real quick
of course
shout out to Kate
and congratulations
on having her baby
I always
I wanted to meet her too
speaking of which
yeah we miss her
tomorrow
is our Christmas special
and we have
it is very very good
everyone please tune in I think it's what three hours at least
yeah three hours it was an awesome episode it was full-on yak last night we did a white elephant
here with the whole office very nice like wasn't even for content it's like hey let's just do
something fun everyone drinking pizza i kept kept on turning to TJ during it.
I was like, dude, I don't understand these rules because it was running so smoothly.
My brain couldn't comprehend how a white elephant worked.
There were no twists.
There were no twists.
And I was like, wait, so you just pick a gift and then maybe it can get stolen like once.
That's it.
I was like, wait, when are we spinning the wheel?
TJ, I could not have understood it less, TJ.
And it was very straightforward.
Yeah, I think we were waiting for a double swap or some sort of rock, paper, scissors.
Someone to say three words and change the entire thing.
The course of history.
Yeah.
I watched the whole thing back last night.
It was just as confusing the second time.
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
It's full force, yeah.
We didn't have to cut anything out
like we normally do
from these longer pre-recorded ones,
but it's just full force yak
for three hours.
It's good shit.
Nick just...
He was in his bed.
He was on one.
Nick's got a big day tomorrow.
Oh, yeah.
They are airing back to back.
Yeah, Henny Friday with the yak.
Henny Friday had a ton of stuff cut out of it.
Nick is going to have quite the day tomorrow.
He was sweating yesterday.
He's like, yeah, there's three hours of me blacked out for Henny Friday
and three for me.
Fifteen full minutes cut out of the Mostly Sports episode.
Oh, man.
I only got 15 minutes out.
The White Elephant yesterday confused me because Corey Rutledge won a night of MOOC.
Yeah.
And I didn't submit that.
Oh.
I had no idea.
Yeah, it was a night of MOOC.
And Liam Blutman made that card and offered me out.
That was the gift, yeah.
Yeah.
Congrats to Corey.
It also was funny because I think there was four or five different gifts that were just
Zinn and Scratchoff.
Perfect.
Yeah.
And it was like a fight.
Everyone was fighting for those.
Can you gift bets?
Someone did.
Like gift card bets?
Someone did, yeah.
Spider gifted a $50 bet on the Bills to win the Super Bowl at 12 to 1.
Oh, that's awesome.
Yeah.
Mackenzie ended up winning it.
Kenzie. Kenzie. Hey, that's a. Mackenzie ended up winning it. Mackenzie.
Hey, that's a good bet. They might
fuck around and win. You never know.
What's the social norm if you win your bet?
Or win a lottery. Someone gives you a lottery ticket
and you win.
That's yours.
A firm paycheck.
What if it's a grand
amount? What is the cutoff
where you have to steal?
It was three steals,
and I ended up stealing from Nicky Smoke's Zin and Scratch Offs.
And then I scratched him off,
and I told him that I won 10 grand, and his heart dropped.
And I was like, just kidding, I won four bucks here.
But it was awesome.
He was like, I can't believe this.
He was like, you have to cut me off some.
I would feel like the honorable thing to do is to just,
I would break them off a little something, but bro, you feel me?
Maybe if they would have scratched it off, they wouldn't have won it.
Maybe it was meant for you to win.
So you win 10K.
What are you doing?
It's not at all.
It depends on who it is.
It depends on who got it from me.
If it's a coworker at a secret center, I'm going to give you a ban,
but that's about it.
That's a lot.
Yeah, like, yeah, they should be happy with it.
You have to do that.
You never know.
It'll be like that.
Somebody might be like, oh, I want five.
They're like, no, that's half, bro.
I can't do that.
Yeah.
Fair.
Would have been sick.
Bro, I wish Stephen Chay was here.
If it was Nicky.
Shout out to Stephen Chay.
I love Stephen Chay, bro.
He's hilarious, bro. I love Chay. Yeah Che, bro. He's hilarious, bro.
I love Che.
Yeah, for sure.
He's a great guy.
I mean, he's here in the fact that he did the prep sheet.
Has he been doing the suicides?
No.
No.
We stopped doing that.
His first question is, what are you hoping for from Santa this year?
Stephen Che is five years old.
Yeah.
Who would you talk to?
Santa's still in my house. Yeah i know but steven chay saying
phrasing that to adults yeah the funniest thing when steven chay said that he um hoped jalen
hurts to get hurt doing the tush push yeah that was one of his best moments yeah and all philly
after him he had that was a bad day for him it was weird because because it almost broke all of those of us around him.
Watching him, we're like, you need to do this, you need to do that.
And he was just, he was fine.
Yeah, he taped an apology.
I feel like he didn't mean any harm.
I feel like if you knew Stephen Chay, then you would have knew about it.
But a lot of people from the outside looking in the pipe,
like, oh, he said, you know, it's not really that serious.
You have a good mindset and outlook, positive outlook, don't you?
Yeah, that's how I am.
Yeah, he says the Browns are thinking soupy.
Hey, soupy.
You can't have a more positive outlook.
I wanted to get the tattoo,
but I just haven't found a good tattoo artist that can do it.
I was going to get a Super Bowl tattoo for the Browns for this year.
Oh, you want to go viral?
Probably for the best.
I wouldn't get it, though. I was also thinking about getting it and just putting a year on it when we do win a Super Bowl tattoo for the Browns for this year. Oh, you want to go viral? Probably for the best. I wouldn't get it, though.
I was also thinking about getting it and just putting a year on it when we do win a Super Bowl.
And if they never do it, I just have it.
I mean, but what if they never do it and I just got this Browns Super Bowl tattoo?
You know, you don't have a year on it, but, you know.
We've never even been to the Super Bowl.
We've got championships.
We've got eight NFL championships.
Yeah, see, this doesn't count.
NFL championships.
So you mean to tell me
Jim Brown
The second greatest football player
His championship don't count
Not in my eyes
Hey
Well or nothing
You ask NFL people
They'll tell you
Jim Brown is possibly
The greatest football player
Non-quarterback
That's true
Yeah
So his championship don't matter
That's out of Jerry Rice
He also is one of those guys
Cause like
You know like when J.J. Watt retires
And they're like
As good as he was at football
He's an even better guy Jim Brown You don't say that for No I mean one of those guys because when J.J. Watt retires and they're like, as good as he was at football,
he's an even better guy.
Jim Brown, you don't say that for.
No, bad guy. I mean, it depends.
He was a lot better of a football player.
Some people say he was a great guy, though,
if you think about it.
It depends on which way you look at it.
Wait, what's going on in Cleveland?
I thought he was fine.
Was he like an activist?
He was a legend.
Oh, Jim Brown.
I think he was like an activist. He was a legend. Oh, Jim Brown. I think he was like an activist.
He was a movie star.
Beat up a decent amount of women.
I didn't know that.
One's enough for me.
I had no idea.
Yeah, no, way better football player than Guy.
Yeah.
Way better.
Why did I not know Jim Brown?
I only knew the good stuff.
I don't know.
Him and Kareem, they were like the face of activism back then. You know? Let's see. See, but it's good stuff and good stuff. I don't know. Him and Kareem, they were the face of activism back then.
Yeah.
See, but it's good stuff and bad stuff.
He was in some movies in the 90s.
Yeah, he was in cowboy movies and shit.
He was a classic.
Great football player.
Classics, bro.
Great football player.
Seven times for assault against women.
Didn't even know it.
Seven's a lot.
So you're going to be my surrogate?
Yeah.
Yeah, that's the
oh it gets worse yeah yeah not a good guy oh what happened i'm sorry i ain't mean to do this jim i'm
sorry you're apologizing to him because yeah i ain't gonna i ain't gonna open this rabbit hole
on here like this right oh yeah i'll speak ill on it oh i think it's worse in 1999
brown was arrested in charge of making terroristic threats towards his wife monique according to
brown the only time we ever have an argument is during her period she has her period every day
okay sorry jim the rest in peace and then the paragraph
prior to that
is
wait
oh he's
he's mentioned with Bill Cosby
oh no
oh
oh
this is way worse
I didn't know you were on that
Cosby wave
oh Jesus
he's uh
okay
so yeah
way better football player
than that guy
he could run that rock though
couldn't he
damn
oh my god
he could
yeah
lacrosse lacrosse oh my God. Lacrosse?
Lacrosse?
Oh, yeah, he played lacrosse.
Yeah, Syracuse legend.
That is his legacy, football and lacrosse.
Like, number 44 on Syracuse football.
Retired.
Wait, that's Ernie Davis, right?
It was.
Wait, I think it was retired for Jim Brownie, like Ernie Davis.
I don't remember.
And then now it's like a legendary.
Remember the movie?
You can wear it, but you have to be a legend.
I like when teams do that, like 88 with the Cowboys.
Yeah, that's what 44 Syracuse is.
88 and the Cowboys has to be a really good result.
So, honestly, I feel like the Bengals should have retired 85,
because Ocho Singo, everything that he did in that number,
I feel like they should have been retired that number.
Who's it now?
Boyd?
No.
No. T. Higgins? No, it's nobody. T. t higgins was but he changed his number to five so i don't know
it's probably like a tight end or something now they don't really care like they don't give a
fuck jim brown played lacrosse he was like the best lacrosse player ever was he the first black
guy to play lacrosse i don't know that no i don't know i I would have guessed. It's possible. Or he probably was the first to be real good at it.
2007 in Glen Burnie.
No, it was a Native American sport.
It was?
Yes.
Oh, yeah.
You didn't know that?
They used to play.
Wait, look it up, TJ.
I'm pretty sure they used to play like the field was like a mile long.
What the fuck?
Yeah, I'm genuinely surprised.
I didn't know that.
I'm genuinely surprised, too.
Who else was playing?
I never hear of old lacrosse stories.
No, because there's a couple guys in the PLL who are Native Americans.
It's like a big deal.
Like the Iroquois or something.
Yeah, they used to play.
It used to be like days long.
I feel bad for them.
Is that how you say that?
Iroquois?
We took it.
White guys took lacrosse.
Iroquois?
Iroquois?
Iroquois.
Iroquois tribe. Iroquois. Iroquois tribe. Iroquois. Oh, White guys took lacrosse. I remember. That's firmly a white sport.
Iroquois.
Iroquois tribe.
Iroquois.
Oh, there's Jim Brown in lacrosse? Oh, my God.
What?
Oh, yeah.
Oh, this is.
He different.
See, Jim Brown is him, though.
You can't lie.
Like, on the field.
On the field.
On the field.
In between the white lines.
On the field.
On the field.
Wait, can you look up lacrosse?
I feel like I've been told that lacrosse, when it was invented by the Native Americans,
they used to play on a field that was like miles long.
Like what if you get all the way to the goal and you don't score?
That's not fun.
And then it's like, all right, now it's their team.
What is the longest football game ever played, I wonder?
What do you mean?
As far as distance?
Yeah, distance between end zones.
I bet you we could probably break that record if we wanted.
Yeah.
Go to an airport.
I'm going to look up across how long these fields were.
This is one of those facts that I feel like I had in my head.
500 yards to several miles apart.
That's crazy.
That's nuts.
Wow.
How would several miles work?
Several miles.
Yeah.
Like, I'd be so pissed if I got all the way down to the goal and didn't score.
I'd just quit.
Turn it over on inches.
I mean, I just wouldn't play.
Well, yeah.
I mean, I'm not going all the way down there.
Damn, KB, I didn't know you didn't know.
I heard about Jim Brown in lacrosse.
I've never played lacrosse.
I never met nobody who ever played it.
Alasek's not here today.
Yeah.
So am I going to be able to do the gauntlet today?
No, we'll do it.
We'll have someone else.
Is the Aztec ball game, is that myth or reality?
What's that?
It's a dance?
You know what I'm talking about.
The game where they like soccer and it's like basketball soccer. Oh, it's like Quidditch? And then they like, I'm talking about. The game where they like... Keep it away....play soccer and they hit... It's like basketball soccer combination.
Oh, it's like Quidditch?
And then they like...
I don't know.
I was always led to believe
they like commit human sacrifices and shit.
Yeah, I know that.
But I then...
That's real.
As I got older,
I thought it was like a myth
that they just made up.
It could easily be, too.
It's either real or a myth.
Some white people just saw hoops
on the side of a wall
and then just...
Yeah, I don't know where you land on this.
He always... He can make me agree with whatever.
You're agreeing with both sides of what he's saying.
I know.
But then I read more and I realized it wasn't.
I don't know either.
But then I read more after that and I realized it wasn't.
I'm agreeing with our shared confusion bringing us together closer.
Yeah, you said on anus, like Titus, if he sent you an email,
you would take it seriously.
Like he's the type of guy that can say. The only guy guy that could and you're the only guy in my life that takes me
seriously so it's very really well i actually i actually i actually commented on a post with
mark titus like the other day like hey like you actually used to be a respective uh figure in
sports yeah i was like it's just funny to actually be here now
do you want to reiterate any sentiments like what about him um um i will say like when i when you
first came on here i was like questionable but like you actually did fit like you fit
perfectly so like i actually enjoy you.
Hell yeah.
Have you interacted with all of us on Twitter at various points?
I know.
Have you blocked?
I'm pretty sure I have.
Like, bro, who does who?
Does Brandon have you blocked?
No, I tweeted at Brandon before like about some Mississippi State shit probably.
Okay.
I tweeted at Mark Tuddy.
I said watch out for the university of cincinnati
hoop team this year they they they disappointed they lost xavier but are you pretty neutral do
you ever go hard at someone like criticism i don't like jack mack i don't like him why i don't i just
don't like him like he's not polarizing i'd be like if y'all can give him a job, I can do his job. No, he's good. I'm like, y'all laid off a lot of people and he's still here.
He's not one to use for that example.
He works his ass off.
He works his ass off.
I mean, I'm just saying from the stuff that I've seen.
Like you said, I don't really know him.
I was like.
No, Jack Mack is very old school Barcelona.
He's deep into the internet, which you need guys like that.
He's like a young KFC.
He's like a young KFC.
Yeah.
There he is, Barstool Barstool.
It seems natural.
Shout out to KFC and Fights, too.
I just wanted to say that.
I fuck with them.
I'm over again?
Are you sweaty?
Are you out of breath?
I was wrapping presents.
You know how hard it is to wrap presents?
Well, no, I don't in my house.
Hey, you look sweaty as shit.
I was sweaty.
I was just full-blown sweating.
Out of breath from wrapping presents.
You're going to have to do the gauntlet again, too.
Oh, God.
Horrible start.
All right.
We'll see you later, dude.
You want to walk back in?
Do you want to?
We have another one over here that's already ready
If you'd like to
Take a time out
Take a time out
Barstool
Go to that one
Take a time out
That didn't happen, we're good
Yeah, we'll pretend that didn't happen
Just start over
Aaron, do you want to shout out
your own promote your own yeah what's your like yeah um everybody check me out my instagram is
the kid from cincinnati my twitter is the kid from cincinnati with a y um yeah i got what about
how is the style it's the okay yeah so yeah check me out i got music on there like my bio i got like
literally like songs that i posted um yeah definitely check me out i got music on there like my bio i got like literally like songs that i posted
um yeah definitely check me out of course no i appreciate all the support i can get i appreciate
y'all for having me the opportunity like i said this is surreal bro like i watch out every day so
it's like crazy to be here yeah thanks for coming out thanks for doing the talent show your bio says
eight time part of my take award-winning list. Oh, there you go. He also, his name on Twitter is PMT Commenter.
Yeah, I show it all the time.
I always, I'm like your reply guy.
Every time that you post, I got y'all notifications on.
Love it.
Mr. Barstool.
Barstool Barstool's here.
Hey, guys. Past week. Itstool. Barstool Barstool's here. Hey, guys.
Past week.
It was good.
I just got drunk.
I wrapped presents.
Yeah.
Saw these guys on Saturday.
Yeah, that was very pleasant.
Was that random?
Yeah, how'd that go down?
Yeah, it was random.
Yeah, so I saw we were at Will's Northwood Inn,
and I saw that he was at Bird's Nest, and was just i gave him a call he was there 10 minutes later yeah still sweating
with his with his girlfriend you called you called her not hot she is significantly better looking
than you yes oh wait you did that what do you remember she that's us three wait like how did
how did the f Cincinnati season end?
Are you serious right now?
Well, I'm looking at your Twitter, and I'm still hurt about how the FC Cincinnati season ended.
It's crazy because I don't even give two fucks about soccer, but I heard that was good, and I bet on them.
There was a 2-0 at halftime, and they lost.
You followed this. Yeah.
It was like, yeah, it was excruciating, honestly.
How big of gatekeepers are the MLS fans?
They got to be.
Got to be.
Got to be.
Yeah, they kind of are, but I think, yeah, I don't know.
I was well-received by the crew people because, like,
I would just go stand in the fan – I said student section –
the fan section or whatever, and I didn't know what the fuck I was
watching or who was on what team, and they were
really nice to me, but
they do seem to check a lot of boxes
of people that would gatekeep a lot, but I
never really had a problem with it, like infiltrating
I think the American
Premier League super fans are
the worst. Yes.
I think it just matters, like, how much,
if you talk from a place of authority, you'll probably piss them off.
Yeah.
But if you're just like, I have no idea what the fuck's going on,
but I love this game, then they're just like,
that's cool that you're paying attention to us.
Hey, Matt, I apologize for not responding to your DM ask for a job.
I had scaries.
You had the scaries after that?
I should have responded so you didn't have scaries.
That's all good.
I just figured I'd see you again, which here we are.
So what do you want to do?
My bad.
I just thought me versus Jerry just doing dumb tasks would be kind of funny.
Although, found out last night.
Yeah, Jerry, after the dark guests don't really work so well.
Yeah, be careful. works so well yeah be careful
yeah i thought you guys did great thank you minus it's a minority opinion it seems yeah
yeah chat's hard chat they've already turned on me yeah oh yeah for sure for sure instant yeah
yeah out of breath and sweating we've already seen this material yeah
this guy one trick pony?
Does he have anything else?
Luke and I were talking this morning.
It's like the chat just goes for, they hop around on who they hate at the moment.
They're hate sluts.
Yeah.
They never turn on Nick, though.
Nope.
Yesterday.
The L.
Yeah.
Yesterday was bad.
Is that why he's not here?
Weird he didn't show up today.
Oh, yeah.
Got out of town?
That is weird. Afraid of town? That is weird.
Afraid of what?
Takes one L.
Wow.
And ditches the yak.
Wow.
Adversity hits and he crumbles.
We'll talk more, though, Matt.
I'm sorry for his mouth.
That's fine.
I think it's that guy over there.
Oh.
I think I'm just always out of breath.
I think I realize that.
You just have been dealing with asthma Oh Brandon
I heard you had a heart attack today
No I didn't have a heart attack
Oh yeah you took a dump and got dizzy
Oh Che hive up
Oh shit
I didn't even think about that
Even Che's about to cash in
I don't know
I don't know if i'm
worn out but i woke up this morning i almost called in sick because i was i was dizzy and i
couldn't i couldn't focus i couldn't do anything and i uh took out my phone to call titus it
started feeling a little better so i said okay i'm gonna drive to the end of my street if i if i'm
no longer dizzy i'll go dizziness stopped drove to work classic dizziness test by the way get
behind the wheel test it out see how i was no no i was already i was i was trying to see who's driving making me dizzy i was already fine it's
like i've had eight beers i might as well try my drunk i don't know let's see i was already fine
and i got and i did okay i got here and when i got out of the jeep when i got off of the you know
when i stopped sitting and i got up real quick, it triggered it again.
And then I took a dump and it triggered it again.
And so I've had dizzy spells all day and yeah.
Are you currently dizzy?
No, I'm good now.
I'm good now.
Stand up real fast.
Don't make me stand up real fast.
That's crazy.
Why would you make me stand up real fast?
I can't imagine what he's saying, dude.
We'll just test to see if you're dizzy.
That's just an asshole thing.
You don't want to see if you're still dizzy? I don't want to be
dizzy. Okay, alright. I want Barstool
Barstool and you to do a decathlon.
Yeah, I would. Maybe that's. I would test
I'd be constantly testing my dizziness.
You want me to stand up? No, I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do.
I'm saying if I were in your shoes, I'd
be doing stuff to see like, is the
dizziness gone? I've been making it so far
so good for a while, for a couple hours.
So I think it might be an early morning thing.
But, yeah, that's in addition to – I've had a lot of migraines.
I don't know.
I'm fine.
I'm just tired.
I need a couple days.
I think everyone's tired.
Yeah.
Were you dizzy on the toilet or after you got up?
After I got up.
Okay.
Yeah, after I got up.
Oh, man.
Were you sitting down for a long time?
On the toilet?
Yeah, it was a while.
Your legs go to sleep?
My left leg went to sleep.
Yeah.
That happens to me sometimes when I'm sitting down for a long time,
like playing a game.
I might get up too fast, and I feel like a rush to my head type shit.
I don't think it's anything real.
I think I've got little small things that keep adding up.
It's getting old.
That's how it is, getting old, man.
You're not old at all, are you?
I just turned 29 last month.
Come on.
I'm old enough, bro.
I feel it.
I feel it coming.
I'm knocking on the door at 30.
How old are you, Barstool Barstool?
32.
You're fucking great.
You're like 50.
No, you're great.
I don't know.
I'm about to be staring down 40.
Yeah, it's going to be rough.
Isn't PFT like 28, right?
That's what it is, right?
Yeah, no, he's 38.
But yeah, we're both going to be staring down 40.
Wait, so I've taken a shit and have had my foot fall asleep.
Have you guys ever jerked off with a foot that's asleep?
No.
Wait, you jerked off with your foot?
Why?
Use the foot to jerk?
No, no, no, no, no.
Like, that would probably feel good.
You're jerking off and your foot's asleep.
You gave yourself a foot job?
No, no.
There's only certain positions.
Physically, I physically can't.
Then your foot's going to go to sleep.
I feel like the foot would be a distraction.
My foot falls asleep in bed, and this one time I was ready to jerk off,
and I powered through the jerk off with my foot asleep.
If part of your body was asleep while you jerked off, did you rape yourself?
I don't know.
You was on demon time that night.
That's a tactic.
That's like family guy.
You ever seen that family guy? that stranger stranger yeah you know a family guy when he said like that
he likes to um make his arm go to sleep and do it yeah that was at the clam right yeah i was at the
clam i think okay so i'm by myself on this one that's fine what is cincinnati's nickname queen
city yeah the queen city i think charlotte queen queen queen palmer um like um Cincinnati's nickname? Queen City. Yeah, the Queen City. I think Charlotte.
You should be like Queen Pete, Queen Palmer.
There's two Queen City?
I'm just the kid from Cincinnati.
You're the queen.
Charlotte is?
Charlotte is Cincinnati.
What about the queen from Cincinnati?
I'm just the kid.
Yeah, I like that.
A lot of people from Cincinnati,
they be on my ass about not
fucking with the Bengals, though.
You know, and I just, I get it, you know?
Like, I'm pretty adamant about that.
Like, fuck the Bengals.
Who's the most famous person from Cincinnati?
P. Rose.
No, from Cincinnati.
Jerry Spring.
P. Rose is from Cincinnati, too, by the way.
Nick Lachey.
Nick Lachey.
P. Rose is from Cincinnati.
That's a good-ass person.
Harriet Beecher Stowe.
Oh, Joe Burrow's from right outside there, right?
He's from Athens?
The other side.
He's not from Cincinnati.
Is Athens not from Cincinnati?
He was dissing Skyline, too.
I don't fuck with Joe Burrow, man.
Huh.
Ho Burrow.
Ha.
Ho Burrow.
Oh, damn.
Shit.
Yep.
Browns 9-1 in the last 10 games against the Bengals.
Just want to throw that out there.
That's actually crazy. Ho Burrow. A little nerd nugget for y'all. I like that. Put1 in the last 10 games against the Bengals. Just want to throw that out there. That's actually crazy.
Ho Burrow.
A little nerd nugget for y'all.
I like that.
Put it in the back.
I like calling anybody whose name is Joe, I like calling him Ho.
That's a strong one.
Ho Montana.
Ho Biden.
Adrian Bronner is a legend from Cincinnati.
Ho Biden.
Yeah.
Adrian Bronner from Cincinnati.
Sleepy Joe just kills.
Sleepy Joe's a great nickname.
He's always asleep.
Perfect.
Dude can't stop being asleep.
Did you guys fall for that?
It's a funny thing to think about.
Our president can't stop being asleep.
Yeah.
He's like, he has to nap.
Yeah, Joe's laying.
He's laying down.
My two-year-old has to nap.
You guys saw the one today?
No.
What did you do today?
He was like waving, shaking hands.
Imagine who people.
Well, let's see it.
How is he running for president again?
I don't want to get political, but how?
Well, Colorado hasn't said he could.
I mean, he's not like.
I feel like they should put an age cap on that shit.
Yeah.
At a certain age, you shouldn't be able to like, bro,
they're putting him in a position of power. What if just croak like tomorrow i think the president should be 18
just let him do fucked up shit young korean boy yeah just having like yeah you do always ultra
focused ultra disciplined korean boy should lead every organization i got actually a guy
i got a random question anybody seen that video like this is random as fuck i've seen the video
of like it was like from a podcast right the dude this girl said i think you're being like really
misogynistic right now and the dude was like what is misogynistic mean why is the girl for like
froze up and like just started crying because like she didn't know what it mean not what was that
this was like the other day wait nobody, nobody's back there, Joe.
Is that real?
Okay.
Is there somebody over there?
The security guard's concerned.
Oh, yeah, dude.
They're like the sideline coach that's like holding back the head coach.
Come on, ho.
Get back, guy.
I love the –
Is he going to go into the flags?
Uh-oh.
What was that?
Pacing
You're going to hug a flag?
The little jog
I love the compilation
Jesus Christ
Of him sniffing hair too
Yeah
Which I actually
That I have no problem with
That was when he was
A good sniff of hair
Sharp with it still
Yeah
He knew what he was doing
That's when he had it
Did you do some hair sniffing?
Hair sniffing's great
Huh
You get a nice sniff of hair?
Shout out to Kelly Keegs, too.
I always wanted to shout her out.
Why'd you do that after I said the hair?
No, I just fuck with Kelly Keegs.
I just wanted to say shout out to her.
Okay.
Shout out.
Anyone else?
Yeah, I mean.
Can we get a list?
Let's throw out all the shout outs.
Let's eliminate.
Can we get a graphic?
All the shout outs?
Let's do a barstool employee tear-maker.
We can do that.
We can do that.
For sure.
I mean, I always thought about this stuff anyway.
So we might as well get it all out now, right?
Yeah.
Might as well.
Wait, did you guys fall for the Trump lemonade?
I was going to say.
Oh, yeah.
I knew that was fake right away, but it's very funny.
I wanted it.
But everyone believed it.
Yeah.
Yeah, everyone did. I mean, I thought it it was semi it could have been real damn it y'all telling me that wasn't real yeah but shout out to trump for cash you should it sounded no it sounded good it didn't
sound because that was the test that it was not like i saw it and immediately was like i gotta
watch this clip yeah looked at the clip didn't exist oh i didn't even know it was a clip i just saw it as a quote it sounded good as a quote right yeah right
okay oh it's top-notch stuff yeah he might still say that he probably loves it he probably will
just take credit yeah he'll probably say it it's a killer line just say it's like lemonade's killing
everyone when life gives you lemon joe biden kills you with them canara bread uh hey brandon i was in uh as an amia a
couple weeks ago oh yeah that's where i live yeah it was uh it's a nice town thank you very much
yeah i went to the one of the eight locations in the northwest suburb location franchising
opportunities are like i called them this did you eat the crust i didn't eat it you didn't eat the
pizza i didn't eat the pizza you did all that but you didn't eat the pizza? I didn't eat the pizza. You did all that, but you didn't eat the pizza?
Yeah, cut down a Christmas tree.
Okay, that makes sense.
Huh.
You like my little town?
It's a good town.
It's nice.
It's a good town.
It's, uh...
I have a lake.
Those lakes are big.
They're big lakes.
Yeah.
I can see why.
I can see why you have such a big boat.
Well, it's not...
Okay.
Like that one.
That wasn't really...
No, that was good.
Just do that whole thing. It's your first time you guys are meeting. It is. It is. I DM'd him really. No, that was good. Did you just do that whole thing?
It's your first time you guys are meeting.
It is.
It is.
I DM'd him after his day, or he DM'd me, one of us.
Somebody DM'd somebody.
And, but you're just doing it for a little, it's a big boat.
Me and you could fit in that boat comfortably.
That thing would sink.
Hold on.
No, no, no.
I think two people could fit in that boat.
Me and you.
I don't know.
I don't think.
I don't know about those two. I promise you, me and you could fit in that boat. Me and you. I don't know about those two.
I promise you, me and you could fit in that boat.
Me and you fit in that boat, no problem.
Well, me and you are you and you.
He's bigger than you, obviously, but two of me's could fit in that boat.
That boat would be fighting for its life.
Three of us could fit in that boat.
Three of us could fit in that boat.
It's a big boat.
Me, you, and?
The three biggest people here could fit in that boat. We've got to figure out how many people could fit in that boat. We should sink big boat. Me, you, and? The three biggest people here could fit in that boat.
We got to figure out how many people could fit in it or straight to the bottom.
No, no, no.
We should sink your boat.
I'll sink my boat.
We have to all stand on your boat until it starts to sink.
How many people can stand on the boat until it?
Get the whole yak in the boat?
How many hangs?
We could get the whole yak in the boat.
Can we do a yak from your boat in the summer?
Yes.
Do a live stream from all of us on the boat i don't know how we're gonna sit how the order that we're gonna sit in it's gonna be pretty tight in there it's a big boat
well you need a bigger boat and there's eight there's eight people right six or seven people
is tj gonna produce from the back of the boat? We can get a secondary boat. Do you think all of your action figures could sink it?
No.
If you did enough?
No, they don't.
I've got them lined up on my windowsill.
There's probably like 600 of them.
I bet you a thousand could.
No, I don't think a thousand could.
I'll put them in my boat to see.
But the boat's up right now.
Why don't you do that?
I'll do that for you.
That would really mean a lot. For you, I will do hey speaking of itty bitty modes of transportation what have you guys
seen the miniature world that's the size of three football fields yes it's the coolest thing no
what there's people there's uh fire trucks it's the whole world can we see it and they're all
complete computer programmed so it's like people putting out fires in the future world.
Oh, so like shit's happening?
Non-stop.
Where is this?
I don't know.
I didn't look into it.
Is the plane always on fire?
Shit's always on fire.
Can you find it to you?
Hoses.
That's kind of sick.
Shout out to Hannah Cook, too.
All right, all right.
Throw it on there.
What's your favorite body of work?
I think she's good at golf.
She's good at golf.
Good at golf, yeah.
Shout out to Beers, Ryan Whitney.
Shout out to those guys.
Tico, Texas.
Power Play.
Surviving Barstool.
That shit was funny as fuck.
Alright, ready? Three people at Barstool.
Dream, blunt rotation.
I say
Roan. I like Roan. I feel like
Roan, I can tell
like he grew up
around black people
you feel me
he's comfortable
with black people
I fuck with him
you can tell he smoked
yeah Roan
like do Gillian
and Wallow count
cause I mean
I would put
yeah Roan
Gillian and Wallow
that's probably the only
three to pick yeah
or like PFT
you feel me
but this is it miniature world that can't be it is it Only three to pick, yeah. Or like PFT, you feel me?
Wait, this is it?
Miniature world.
That can't be it, is it?
It's the whole world? Yeah, this is miniature.
Oh, it's in New York.
Isn't this like a Matt Damon movie where he shrinks himself down?
You're thinking of The Bourne Identity?
No, that was a different movie.
That is a movie.
What the fuck?
Green Zone. I gotta look it up movie. What the fuck? Green Zone.
I got to look it up now.
I want to like Godzilla.
I can see the poster.
Matt Damon.
Why was there a dinosaur in Europe?
This is crazy.
This whole show has made me think I am having a stroke.
I just can't keep up.
What are we looking at now?
The Middle East. The mini Middle East. I just can't keep up. What are we looking at now? The Middle East.
The mini Middle East.
Yeah, this is the future.
Yeah, I'd be –
Do y'all ever like – do y'all like looking at the chat while I like laugh?
No.
I'm about to do that right now.
It makes me want to cry.
I wouldn't – I'm just going to say I wouldn't recommend it.
I don't know what they're saying.
It throws you –
But I wouldn't recommend it. It'll throw off your flow. Yeah, I mean, I'm just going to say I wouldn't recommend it. I don't know what they're saying, but I wouldn't recommend it.
It'll throw off your flow.
Yeah, I mean, I've just thought about that.
Like, because I'm used to, like, yesterday I was watching it,
I was, like, in a chat, like, now I'm here.
Are you a chat guy?
Yeah, yeah.
Okay.
Downsizing.
I type a little bit.
Downsizing?
Yeah, downsizing.
Downsizing was the movie.
I thought that was about him losing weight.
He decides to undergo a recently invented procedure to shrink his body
so he can start a new life in an experimental community.
Or is everything small?
I don't know.
I never saw it, but I just remember the poster.
The Honey, I Shrunk the Kid remake, I think.
Hey, how many...
That reminded me of...
Are they releasing the Epstein list?
Yeah.
I'm hyping it up.
One of y'all is probably on it.
How many people are having the worst Christmas ever?
I think the Panthers own her.
That was a fake tweet.
Oh, it was?
Yeah.
That was a fake tweet.
God dang it.
Your internet on Q.
Hey, y'all heard about that, James?
Well, I mean, it was someone tagging me in it.
Was it a fake Schefter?
It was a fake Schefter.
God damn it.
Is that even like, what's the humor in that?
I think it's Panthers fans being like
get him out. Oh, got it.
There's got to be some people that are like
this is going to be the worst.
Yeah, but it's also...
It's been supposed to come out for what?
Two years now? Yeah, but now we're really close, right?
They should do one name at a time.
Make it a TV special.
Like once a week.
Oh, Selection Sunday!
Do a bracket? Brian Gumbel. at a time. Make it a TV special. Like once a week. Oh, Selection Sunday! Oh, that'd be sick.
Brian Gumbel.
Playing out of the Midwest region.
And you could take futures on the...
Barack Obama.
One seed. Michael Obama.
You saw they were holding three names
from the West.
That's smart.
That's how you get people to talk about
bill chelsea and okay oh biden did you guys see that conan i'd never seen that i think it's a
couple months yeah so i just watched it yesterday i'll send it to you tj it's maybe one of the
funniest clips he's so conan is so fucking smart when and like funny whenever you see someone
who's that effortlessly funny you're just like
fuck man and he's like six six is he but he is a ginger he's gotta be number one ginger right
yeah i'm not the biggest conan guy but he's like a top you don't like conan i i've just never got
into like late night like his shtick really oh the fact that he's putting on he's putting on
for the boys is crazy who's number one ginger i took I took Ron Weasley, Rupert Grint.
But nonfiction.
Right now.
Oh, the actor?
Right now.
Andy Dalton's not really playing anymore.
There's no athletes.
They're not the real right.
Blake Griffin might be retired.
The actor that plays Dick Winters in Band of Brothers.
That's a good one.
Is Mark McGuire a ginger goat?
I don't reckon.
When you say ginger to me, Mark McGuire doesn't come to mind.
Strawberry.
I like gingers, but honestly, gingers are like the black people or white people.
Hell yes.
Thank you.
Wait, say that again.
Hold on.
I got to follow it.
Say that again.
Gingers are the black people of white people.
I fuck with white people.
Rats, mook.
They classify each other by hair color.
Wait, so the black people?
Black people, they don't do it by hair color.
It's like, say you might do it by skin complexion.
Light skin people, dark skin people, brown skin people.
You feel me?
Oh.
They got like genderish, you know, brunettes.
I've been ostracized for years.
Oh, I understand this.
Yeah.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
And they have a word.
What?
Ginger.
Yeah, ginger.
You don't say it at the ER.
It's ginger.
Ginger.
Exactly, yeah.
No hard work.
Thank you, brother.
We should get Mincy to say ginger and cancel him.
Mincy posted his New Year's resolutions just now.
Oh. Oh, well, I'd like to
see those.
That's
before you assume, learn
the facts before you judge, understand why before
you hurt someone, feel before you speak,
think. This is the list?
This is a resolution.
New Year's resolutions.
That's not a resolution.
That's the mantra.
That's a resolution for other people.
Talking about Mincy.
What?
Is he talking about how he needs to do this?
Resolutions should be goals to attain.
What is this?
This might be a little vague.
His resolution is for other people to do this to him.
He's setting other people's
agenda towards for you that would make it very mincey right yes his resolution is other people
him differently i guess your resolution his resolution is is for how he gets affected
by the world's decisions right okay i have a new year's resolution. I'm going to try to eat more Dairy Queen blizzards in 2024.
That's a good one.
That's pretty good, right?
Yep.
Sustainable.
That's such a good item.
Yeah.
It's the best.
And I don't do it enough.
I've forgotten about this.
Why haven't I?
I forget.
As I've gotten older, I forgot they exist.
What's a good number?
50?
50 is a high number.
50 is a high number.
I think I can do it.
One a week.
50 is doable.
One a week?
Yeah, I can do it.
That's high.
A week.
A week.
I think that's low for somebody wanting to eat more Dairy Queen.
One a week.
I only eat.
I probably had like four this year.
You get it.
So I just need to get five?
25 once every two weeks.
Bring back the glizzards.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I mean, I'm big on New Year's resolutions that are very easily attainable,
and they're like things you like that you're going to do more of.
Not like, oh, I'm going to lose weight.
I'm going to read more.
No, I'm just going to eat a couple more Blizzards.
Yeah.
That's strong.
Yeah.
Pleasure.
Strong one, right?
Yeah, it's really good.
You guys can take one.
I had one a couple years ago, just drink more apple juice.
Did you?
Yeah.
It's the best juice.
Apple juice is great. So good. S you? Yeah. It's the best juice. Apple juice is great.
So good.
Slept on.
Eat more Twin Steaks.
I love the season of like New Year's where everybody's like posting a, oh, I'm going
to do this and next year I'm going to do that.
Y'all ever see the meme with the girl walking up into the next year with the world on her
back?
You ever see that?
No.
Like, bro, it's every year around this time.
It's like, you know, the same the same shit. There are a lot of people
full of shit. We should spin that
narrative and lean into your vices.
Right. I thought you were going to say
I'm going to drink more next year.
More TV parlays next year.
How close are you on the meme shirts?
The GIF shirts.
I feel like they're still not...
I've seen people try to rip it off and they haven't
it's close though
it is close
I was
maybe next year
my brain was so ahead of science
that was like
7, 8 years ago
or yeah
Barstool
so much
do you have any passion projects
lose weight
but that probably should
eat less candy
it's a passion project
yeah it's a passion project
I went to the gym 3 straight days oh project. Yeah, it's a passion project.
I went to the gym three straight days.
Oh, that's huge.
Yeah, it's big.
No, you should eat more candy.
Yeah, more candy.
Are you like building anything or creating something?
I feel like you're just kind of living. It's pretty normal, I guess.
Yeah, I don't really have many passion projects.
The Bears.
Bird's Nest.
Bird's Nest.
Yeah.
Studying for the bar.
Wait, you're studying for the bar? Yeah, started on Monday. Bird's Nest. Yeah. Studying for the bar. Wait, you're studying for the bar?
Yeah.
Started on Monday.
That's major, bro.
Yeah, the other bar.
Oh.
Oh.
I've already passed it once.
I don't know why I have to take it again.
Why do you have to take it again?
Yeah, what?
Stupid.
Different state, right?
I took it in Oklahoma.
So I passed it in Oklahoma, but Illinois I won't like.
Damn.
I want to acknowledge it.
That's bullshit.
What's the hardest part about the bar?
What even is the...
I know what the test gets you to, but what's the structure?
I think just memorizing it all.
Is it all written?
It's open-ended, right?
It's written one day, multiple choice the next.
Two days? It's open-ended, right? It's written one day, multiple choice the next.
Two days?
It's like seven hours or six hours of writing one day and then six hours of multiple choice the next.
There's no amount of money you could pay me.
Yeah, it sucks.
So what is the best case scenario for someone your age as a lawyer?
I think just make bank, get a good job.
Range Rover?
Do not what I'm doing
country club yeah I want to fuck chicks but what is the goal like when someone goes to
I think they want to become partners quick as they possibly can and do nothing yeah I think
it's matching range like the goat lawyer Johnny Cochran matching Range Rover's awesome yeah
Matt Locke Dershowitz I don don't know. Isn't Kim Kardashian's dad
supposed to be like a good lawyer? Oh, yeah.
Shapiro? Is it Shapiro? No.
We're just listing all of OJ's.
All of OJ's. That's all we're doing right now.
That's all we're doing. They are the GOATs.
Morgan and Morgan probably the best.
Yeah, I think they've got to be number one.
Dan Morgan's personal friend.
Guy rules. The linebacker? Isn't Kim Kardashian
a lawyer now?
No, I think she was going to try, but I don't think she passed.
Okay.
Because in California, you don't have to go to law school.
Oh.
So you can just take the bar if you want.
Oh, that kind of rocks.
So that's where PFT should go if he wants to become a lawyer.
Got it.
Which I think he could pass.
I mean, with a lot of Adderall, I think you can like any test yeah that's probably true very very true that's how i passed like all of my exams how i got my power clean max in college
that's how i passed it worked you lifting on like 40 pounds more than i normally did when i was on
that it was also like my first time ever doing it yeah but it pumps you up right you get like
focused you get i don't know
made me stronger it's like steroids yeah it's good stuff that just made me think so um what's
up with that barstool kush i got that going like yeah that's a lot yeah that's a lot on our plate
you want some of the kush or do you want to get it i take it i take whatever you want to do business
or you just want to smoke my kush i I won't. Would that not be business?
I mean, I promote Barstool.
If you promote the kush.
For sure.
Yeah.
You know, it just got legal in Ohio, too, so.
Yeah.
Really?
I feel like Ohio's a big deal.
Recreation?
Ohio, late as fuck, yeah.
You guys should try to get some NFL deals.
Betting, like sports betting, just got legal in Ohio this year.
It's crazy.
I just started gambling this year
And I'm already like down bad
I want like the bad girl
When I first started
I thought Big Cat was good
I was just
Copy from him
I just did a lot of shit
That he did
Sorry but no
Yeah it's okay
I learned now
I'm a pro now
But like January
I was
Not good
Don't listen to me
Yeah if you guys got
If you guys got like a
Sick like
Outfielder in a baseball,
like Mississippi State baseball would be a Barstool Cush athlete.
Oh, that'd be sweet.
I don't know.
What are you doing?
What?
Why did you just randomly say that?
I was thinking baseball and Mississippi State game line.
Isn't that a compliment?
Okay, thank you.
Appreciate that.
Want to say LSU?
That works.
Don't you want your players to get some NIL Barstool Kush money? I don't know
that Mississippi's ready for a Barstool Kush athlete.
Okay, maybe... They don't like
when I say fuck. A Pepperdine point
guard.
That'd be great. Perfect. I want
a really fucked up
gymnast.
He's always getting into legal trouble. And keeps getting injured because they're soast. Yeah. He's always getting into legal trouble.
And like,
keeps getting injured
because they're so high.
Yeah.
Are there any bad boy gymnasts
or bad girl gymnasts?
The boys are,
yeah,
they're deviant little dudes.
The boys are crazy.
Yeah.
There's an uncle.
They're rambunctious.
They're whippersnappers.
Oh,
shout out Will Compton
and Taylor LeJuan.
There we go.
There we go.
I'm like a tier two fan
of their shit.
Okay.
You know,
but I do personally feel like they copy a lot of shit shit. Okay. But I do personally,
they copy a lot of shit off PMT,
but that's neither here nor there.
Yeah.
Jeff Nadeau?
Do you like Jeff Nadeau?
I don't know who that is.
Well, good.
KB, do you follow these gymnasts?
I don't follow any gymnasts.
There's the new Barca.
You should see this guy in Pennsylvania.
TJ, play that Conan clip.
If you guys haven't seen it, it's fucking...
Much has been said about Jeffrey Epstein.
Oh, yeah.
Terrible things.
I'm talking about Jeff Epstein, the New York financier.
Yes!
We're talking about the same Jeff Epstein.
No.
Yes!
No.
Yes! What? I never heard. Yes, we're talking about the same Jeff Epstein. No. Yes. No.
Yes.
What?
I never heard.
Oh, it was a big story in the news.
Huge.
Yes.
For you to say no one ever said.
Jeff Epstein.
Yes.
Jeff Epstein.
Yes, the financier.
With the island.
Yes, he had an island that I've never been to.
Yeah.
I'm pretty sure, with respect, if there was some news about Jeff Epstein, I would have heard.
No, I don't know what rock you've been under.
It was a huge story.
And I have to tell you, Jeff Epstein, he's gone.
He's dead. What do you mean?
He's dead.
He's dead.
He's dead.
Ha ha!
Sorry.
Oh, my God! If Jeff Epstein were deceased, I'm pretty sure I would know about it.
Now, I admit I've not, probably since the pandemic, I have not talked to him.
That would make sense.
That would make sense.
He's been dead for a number of years, Jim.
I'll tell you, there's one easy way.
Let's call Jelaine Maxwell.
No, not Jelaine Maxwell. She's been dead for a number of years, Jim. I'll tell you, there's one easy way. Let's call Jelaine Maxwell. No, not Jelaine Maxwell.
She's in prison.
She's in prison for crimes she committed with Jeff Epstein.
Jelaine's in prison.
Yes.
Stop calling her Jelaine.
How do you know these people?
Jim.
All right.
Jim, listen.
Okay.
I'm just saying, I don't.
There's people who are responding being like, they're telling on themselves.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh my God.
Just unbelievable.
I think it was Kimmel or Fallon had a weird defensive stance when asked about Epstein.
Really?
I don't know which one it was.
I've got to find it.
Damn.
Hopefully Fallon. Yeah, I just was thinking about it when I saw that their names were being released.
It's like, there's got to be people who are When I saw that their names Were being released It's like there's gotta be people
Who are just like
Every day
People are
They wake up
Orchestrating kills
Do you think
I don't know
But it's just like
Every day they wake up
And they're like
Is this the day
The list is coming out
That's probably worse
Than getting caught
That guilt
Yeah right
They should just never release it
They should just always tease it
The implication If your name is on the list is that you you fuck kids is that the idea
overarching yeah i would say that's what i would assume yeah or watch which is well it's kind of
a tough one to be like no i just i knew him as a financier yeah i don't yeah i don't know i mean
i'm just thinking of like all the times you
yeah i don't know like is there not a world where you just know him as a financier i don't know i
don't know enough about this story yeah yeah i don't know either just reminds me of like all
when people like tweet pictures of people with like jared from subway like explain this yeah
it's like what he was oh he was a guy that was promoting subway yeah we
watched that documentary the jared from subway documentary the whole time i was watching i was
like if this was just a different time and place he 100 would have been on pmt yeah oh like jared
for some way yeah exactly yeah yeah yeah he's doing a tour we absolutely would have had him on
would have been bad.
You guys want to do the gauntlet?
Yeah, yeah.
I think I have to.
Yeah, you have to.
You want to set it up, Brandon?
Are you dizzy?
You had liver king, didn't you?
Yeah.
That guy's crazy.
Yeah.
What's up with him?
He came out as obviously a fraud.
I know, but I heard he's like corroding.
Shout out Billy Football too.
Okay.
That just made me think about Billy Football.
Yeah.
No, he was one of those guys when we had him on,
I'm like, he's such a fraud, but people, I guess,
will like it.
Yeah, I mean, interesting.
He smelled terrible.
Terrible.
Yeah, that's what I've heard. He smelled so bad. I mean, he's got smelled terrible. Terrible. Yeah, that's what I've heard.
He smelled so bad.
I mean, he's got to have, like, just meat rotting in him.
I'll goalie.
Yeah.
Dude, that diet, like.
Oh, big cat goalie.
Barbecue chicken or late.
Barbecue chicken or late.
We have a second row back.
Okay.
Now that we are approaching fall, there's no better time to try out some row back.
You guys all know how much we love row back.
Q-Zips.
Best.
Holos.
Hoodies.
Hoodies.
Barstool Barstool's reppin'.
Joggers.
And the only way to describe it is the best fit, best feel.
We can't go anywhere without seeing someone wearing a roback performance hoodie simply put these are the softest stretchiest
hoodies out there we know we will be living in these things all fall uh they just released their
brand new performance crew necks for both men and women they are breathable yet so soft and
comfortable they are perfect for a crisp fall morning while you're on the move or having a
relaxing weekend so kick your fall off right and use the code YAK on Roback.com for 20% off your first purchase through the end of this week.
That's R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com.
That's 20% off Roback.com for all performance hoodies, crewnecks, joggers, and more with code YAK.
Kick that fall off right, man.
Yeah.
Get that fall.
Get that fall.
Barstool Barstool looks comfortable
as hell. Fall's
the best. One day left.
Yeah, fall. Oh, shit. Kick the fall.
Kick the fall. You gotta get some
shots up, Aaron. I saw you earlier. You were
rusting Wallace. I was just rusting.
Go take a couple. Go get warmed up.
One thing I do now I do is hoop.
Where is Nick, by the way?
He, uh way At the airport
Oh that's right
He knew we were off
So you got the chilies
Probably
Oh yeah
Great food
Aaron's got Dukes after him now
What
Oh no what does that mean
Aaron you got Dukes after you.
Now you know a lacrosse player.
He said, I like the guy on the Yaks seeing
Jack Mack get millions of views every week
and being like, yeah, I could do that, but I don't want to.
Fair point.
Yeah, you fucked up saying that.
It was stupid. Jack Mack works very
hard and does a very good job.
Fair point, but also that's how fandom works.
Yeah, true. When you're watching
athletes, you're like, he fucking sucks.
I could make that kick. I wouldn't drop
that ball. Yeah, I wouldn't drop that.
I would never take 30 shots.
Yeah.
That's true. He's just doing that with a bar stool.
Yeah, that is pretty much
all the comment section and everything, which I get.
It's like chat. It fucking sucks. If I took
his job, I'd do it better than him.
It's like
every subreddit in the world
starts with good intentions
and it just becomes like, we hate
this show, but we're going to
comment on it constantly and nitpick everything
they say. So you've got to understand that's
no different than a message
board for a college football team.
That's just how it goes goes it's funny how that never reflects in like other jobs like no one's ever in like an accounting subreddit and like i could do better yeah but i it's part of
the part of the job i never yeah never like uh i never take it against anyone who's like yeah i
just no i i take like apart everything you say it's like, yeah, I just... No, I... I take apart everything you say.
It's like, yeah, that's what I do for a living with sports teams.
Yes.
But he done goofed by prefacing that by saying he wanted a job.
Yeah, that's true.
That part.
Yeah.
Well, when it's said on the internet, it reads different than when it's said in real life.
When you say it out loud as a human being, you're like, I want a job.
That guy kind of sucks. You're like, well, that's a ridiculous yeah that's like with an anonymous name on in the internet
you're like oh okay maybe um all right yeah should we do it aaron you ready we got to get
aaron a belt he's made one yet i'm scouting aaron and he's uh he Aaron a belt. I don't think he's made one yet. I'm scouting Aaron, and he needs a belt.
You got us.
A push belt.
All right.
I'm going to go goalie.
You go first.
Yeah, you go first.
Bite him in the ass.
Yeah.
Are you worried about the pants situation?
He's good.
Okay.
A lot of.
You know what it says?
He watches the Yak every day and he needs us to explain to him?
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
Wait, today's what?
Over this line.
I don't know. Pick a football, knock the bottle down,
in the free corner, roll it down, and then three-pointer.
Roll it down, three-pointer, and it goes to Sporkle.
No, today's Maresh's birthday.
Happy birthday, Maresh.
Happy birthday, Maresh.
Happy birthday, Maresh.
I missed it.
Wait, Connor, you want to do it or you want me to do it?
I got it.
All right.
All right, Connor will be in goal.
Connor, you got your mouth guard in?
Yeah.
No.
Oh, fuck.
Do you need to get it? I don't in? Yeah. No. Oh, fuck.
Do you need to get it?
I don't have it on me today.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, no.
I wonder if he puts on the mouth guard before he eats pussy.
This is... We're good?
TJ, we good?
Oh, God.
Oh, God.
All right.
Three, two, one, go.
Oh, no. Oh, no. one, go. Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, he threw it one?
Oh, he double bag it?
I'm going to say right now I'm not nervous about my record.
Oh.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Eric.
This is going to be pathetic.
You got it faster.
Come on.
He's got a rip.
We've never had a cornhole re-rack. We've never had a cornhole re-rack. Oh, he got it. Come on. Let it rip. We've never had a cornhole re-rack.
We've never had a cornhole re-rack.
Oh, I got it.
Hey.
Oh, not a bad shot.
Remember, he's an FC Cincinnati fan.
Yep.
Nice, Connor.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
There we go.
Not terrible.
He does have a red Statue
Oh
Didn't like that
Not a great
Not a great pitcher
Good eye
He's not a great pitcher
Thing is too
If he had gotten
Under two minutes
I would have given him
A job
Oh god
Don't say that
Nope
Imagine how
How fucked up
That would be
Yeah
Pray the guy Off the street It's like Hunger Games Shit What an internship Nope. How fucked up that would be.
Pray the guy off the street.
It's like Hunger Games shit.
What, an internship?
Get two minutes.
The guy's still out there.
Ugh.
I feel bad I didn't say hi.
I'm going to say hi when I leave.
Yeah.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh. Oh, no. No. No. Oh. Oh.
Oh, no.
No.
No.
No.
No charity.
He's getting straight time.
Whatever his time is.
Come on.
This is going to make you feel good, Barstool Barstool.
I'm still very nervous. Do you have any new approaches?
Got it
Football
Football
It's gotta be better mentally
Alright
Here we go
Football
Not terrible
No
Are you gonna change your football tactic or no?
Yeah your football tactic
Is what did you in
I hit the lab this week
I think
I think I'm going to do better.
Having a catch with your wife?
Yes.
No.
No.
Absolutely not.
Absolutely not.
Yeah. All right. Yeah He's still doing okay
He doesn't have a shot
He doesn't?
No
I would assume he did
Oh there he is
Oh wow
Leaving the rack behind
A wild Liam Blutman
Called his shot on them My bad Oh, leaving the rack behind. A wild Liam Blutman.
Oh!
Called his shot on that one. My bad.
All right, Sporkle.
11 states to border Canada.
That looks easy.
Five NFL wide receivers with five or more 100-catch seasons.
Dr. Seuss.
Okay, you go there.
All right, I Seuss. Okay, you go there. R.L. Stine.
Okay.
I think it's S-T-I-N-E.
Yeah.
Taco Bell, KFC, Pizza Hut.
Let's go.
All right.
We're cooking. There you go. All right. We're cooking.
There you go.
Five or more.
Check out 11 states supporter Canada.
TJ Hujamazada.
Oh.
I love that.
Jerry Rice.
That's not going to spell it right.
Jerry Rice.
Terrell Owens.
Yeah.
Tyreek Hill.
Not Jerry Rice.
Wow. Whoa. Tyreek Q not Jerry whoa whoa
11 states to border Canada
feel like you're avoiding
Washington
up north
New York
New Jersey
5 global export
leaders 2022
countries who are the power players Five global export leaders 2022.
Countries.
Who are the power players in the world?
What countries?
Stick with those states.
There's a lot of meat on that boat.
Michigan.
Yeah.
Two more. Two more.
Like what?
Montana? Minnesota?
Yeah, those would work Okay
Not too bad, not too bad
Baseball got you
Baseball did
I did a lot worse than I expected, but it was fun
Your basketball was great
I've had a feeling like I'm going to miss all these shots
But I'm going to make it when it's time
For the little I know about you, Aaron,
you definitely thought you're like, we're going sub two.
It's the way your brain works.
Yeah.
It's confidence.
Yeah.
Where's he at in the leaderboard?
444.
You are right in between Ben Mintz and Cam.
I beat Cam. hey, Cam Newton.
There you go.
That's what's up.
That would have been great if you were a little bit better than Ben Mince
and he was in an Aaron Cam Newton sandwich.
That's a big three.
Oh, parcel, parcel, getting a little toss in.
All right.
Was he in jeans the last time?
I believe so I think this is what he wears every day
Yeah
It's a uniform
Okay
Ready TJ?
No
No No. No.
Ready?
Here we go.
Here we go. All right all right three two one go oh oh he's moving fast there we go
oh rocket
oh oh con Connor getting dirty.
Uh-oh.
Oh.
17 seconds in.
On to Wiffle Ball.
He was good at Wiffle Ball.
Oh, yep.
Crank it.
He got it on the first. Here is the.
On to football, 26 seconds.
Oh, and it's still the same throw.
Horribly under throw.
Still the same throw.
A million miles an hour.
Going back for his second attempt.
And way north.
Way north.
For the third attempt.
Nope.
Even further north.
This is tough because he definitely had nights in the last week where he just woke up in sweats.
Oh, the fourth attempt was so, so north.
He's gonna
go south again. Oh, lefty!
Five was even worse.
He's quickly doing this shit.
Progressively worse somehow.
Number six.
Even farther north.
Number seven.
Oh!
Couldn't have been worse.
Is that even on the map? That was a spike.
I don't think there's anything.
Just as high as I'm stuck.
He hasn't been close.
He can't do anything that will get him better at this.
Ninth attempt.
Ninth attempt is just so preposterously far away from any ball.
Number 10.
Number 10. Number 10.
Oh, he's going chest pass.
He's degrading himself again.
Have some dignity.
Come on.
His 11th attempt.
This was the farthest north yet.
He's in the paint.
Above the line again.
TJ, do we know the record for most football tosses?
I think he has it.
He has it?
Well, all right.
He's about to break his own record?
Yeah.
So far.
Can you play like clown music?
There's never been anyone worse.
And he's good at everything else.
He's never going to come back.
All right.
His 22nd attempt.
Is my time safe?
No.
No, I mean.
It looked like it.
Oh, there it is.
Oh, he's out of breath.
All right.
The first basketball shot.
He's an air ball. Second basketball. The first basketball shot is an air ball.
Second basketball.
Oh, no.
Closer air ball.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Number four.
Oh, no.
Brick.
There it is.
Oh.
Rim.
No.
Brick.
Number seven is an air ball.
Take your time.
It's a brick 9th attempt
Get it over the rim
You can't make it unless you get it over the rim
There we go and he surpasses the rim
Number 11 is an air ball
Number 12
Yes
Sunk number 12 onto the next
Basketball shot
Will he beat Palmer?
First one looks good.
Oh, nope.
Number two.
Nope.
Also close.
Nope.
Number three, not so much.
Nope.
Number four, no.
Number five.
Yes.
Sunk it.
All right, here we go.
Three minutes, 30 seconds on this.
Mod Hoss. 12 NFL teams never won a Super Bowl. Yes. Sunk it. All right, here we go. Three minutes, 30 seconds on this. Madhouse.
12 NFL teams never won a Super Bowl.
Take Brandon's chair.
Sit down.
Sit in Brandon's chair.
Brandon's chair.
Brandon's chair.
Right here.
Get the mic.
You got to talk to the mic.
You got to talk to the mic.
Michael.
Michael Jordan.
12 NFL teams never won a Super Bowl.
Chargers.
Bengals. Bills.
Bengals, Bills.
Jordan, LeBron.
Order of Operations and Math.
Sega.
Nintendo.
Nintendo. What the hell? sega nintendo
oh what the hell he's got three on the board those are the companies those aren't the platforms
it's like a genesis you gotta stick with the superbowls yeah you gotta stick with the superbowls
uh there's a lot of teams stink bad teams Giants Alright, McDonald's dipping sauces
We got three on the board
NFC North
Ranch BBQ
Ranch is a hit
NFC North
He's a sauce guy, come on now
Vikings, Lions
The six
Oh god, I suck He's a sauce guy. Come on now. Vikings. There you go. Lions. On to six.
Oh, God, I suck.
All right.
He's in real one territory.
Seven.
He's on to five minutes.
He said Lions.
Eight down. It's the name of the video game system from 1994.
Nintendo.
All right, five minutes and ten seconds.
Needs one more.
Fuck.
Nintendo.
What? Think of new NFL teams. A better Nintendo. Nintendo. Think of new NFL teams.
A better Nintendo.
11.
Think of new NFL teams.
11.
Jaguars.
There you go.
Jaguars should do it, and that's it.
Oh, he got Atari Jaguars.
Yeah.
Not bad.
That was, in fact, bad.
I'm feeling a relief right now.
Wait.
The football, man.
It says Browns there have never won a Super Bowl.
That's weird.
Eight NFL champions.
Last time I checked.
So you got worse than last time.
Can I go get my mama from the airport?
Yeah, yeah.
Let's end the show anyway because we got to do some shit.
Everyone's got to get to the airport.
Any final words?
It was the football, man. You were close. Yeah, we got let's end the show anyway because we've got to do some shit. Everyone's got to get to work. Any final words? It was the football, man.
You were close.
Yeah, we've got to spin our wheel.
Let's spin our wheel.
Hopefully it's nice to us.
Hey, bye, Brandon.
Yeah, yeah, go, go, go, go, go.
Bye, Brandon.
Have a good Christmas.
All right, wait, so I did better than Will Compton?
Yeah.
Hell yeah, fuck yeah.
Brandon, he doesn't even say goodbye.
I know.
I'm going to miss him.
His excuse was that he's leaving. We're like, yeah, go get your mom. And then he's like, okay, and then just gets up and leaves. And He doesn't even say goodbye. I know. I'm going to miss him. His excuse was that he's leaving.
We're like, yeah, go get your mom, and then he's like, okay,
and then just gets up and leaves, and he doesn't even say goodbye.
Did I say shout out, Josie?
Everybody have a great Christmas.
That's the last we'll see of him.
He might have a heart attack over a break.
He's fucking dizzy and shit.
Thanks for rolling up again, Barstool Barstool.
You're a great vibes guy. Yeah, you are Barstool. You're a great vibes guy.
Yeah, you are.
You are.
You're a great vibes guy.
Oh, my.
Would have been bad.
All right, so tomorrow, three-hour Yak Christmas special.
It does not disappoint.
Everyone, please subscribe.
Thank you for tuning in today.
We didn't even know we had work today.
Yeah.
But we're here.
And we'll be back the second.
Second.
The second.
Second will be the next Yak.
So, yeah, tomorrow we'll have one, and then do we have shit planned for the week off?
TJ, we got some best ofs?
Yeah, we could put something out next week.
All right, so we'll put something out for the people, for anyone who has to work.
But, yeah, so tomorrow, Christmas Yak, then second we'll be back.
Season 15?
Our new season?
What are we on?
11.
I think we have, I've decided that the magician
Once a day for a month
Was a little much
But we are going to do a magician
Every day for the first week back
Perfect
If it works
I'll extend
Just don't commit to a full month
Because I was just thinking about it
People are going to get pissed about this,
but when we come back for Magician here, that would be great.
Yeah, I know.
A little present for us after New Year's.
We have one ready to go.
I think Chase got one ready to go.
Amazing.
For the Tuesday, yeah.
All right, thank you, everyone.
Love you guys.
Happy holidays.
Thank you.
Happy New Year.
Merry Christmas, boys.
Happy New Year.
Barstool, Barstool. Merry Christmas. More blizzards New Year. Merry Christmas, boys. Happy New Year. Barstool, Barstool.
Merry Christmas.
More blizzards in 2024.
See everyone next year. It's the act.
It's the act.
Yeah, it's time to talk shop.
We're doing Yankees love.
It's the act.
It's the act. Hey, Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays.
Shout out the chat.
Hey, make sure to say shout out the chat.
Hey, shout out the chat, by the way.
Shout out the chat.
And shout out the chat.
All right, see you guys next year.
Make sure you watch the stuff tomorrow.
Bye.
Happy Holidays, motherfuckers!
Peace!