The Yak - Jerry Returns After a Career-Threatening Crash | The Yak 8-18-22
Episode Date: August 18, 2022Brandon is okay, as wellYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
It's the Yak.
It's the Yak.
It's your dog, Yak, style, the game for a while.
It's the Yak.
It's the Yak.
Alright, stop. It's the Yak. It's the act. All right, stop.
It's the act.
It's the act.
Thursday, day after 100K day.
Woo-hoo!
If they see this opening shot, it might dip dramatically below 100K.
Yeah.
Snooze fest.
Why?
Why?
Because we all suck?
I just meant me and Kate.
The shot of me and Kate.
You guys suck?
Specifically us.
Yeah, that's what I was saying, because we suck.
Right.
I don't like when you lead the show like this, because then we start at a disadvantage.
What's our disadvantage?
I start on a sad note?
Yeah, nobody cools here.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
You're right.
I'm going to bring it back up.
We got all the boys here.
We got Owen and Nick and KB all here.
Send me a picture of his nut for 100K if you guys want to see it.
I've never seen the nut.
I don't know if I should see the picture or if I should wait and see the nut live.
Oh, wait.
You have to see it live.
Can I see it?
You have to see it live, I think.
It's still there.
Also, he has big hands.
Very.
We need Kate to see the nut.
Well, he'll be here.
He'll be in.
Well, he'll be in today?
No, not today.
Oh, eventually.
You've got to get a picture of that nut in one of our hands. i'd like to see them that you have to see it in person as well
it's like the grand canyon but not like rock yeah kyle you uh join some empanada
yeah empanadas for lunch today mission that office rice and beans
there he is uh-oh oh Big cat is here
Running by with a part of my cheesesteak it looks like
I was super hungover yesterday
Felt like shit
What time did you get hungover?
You guys all bailed out quick
Yeah we went and drank more
Did you really?
I had to do a show
How'd it go?
Awful
It wasn't bad?
Yeah I don't remember
It wasn't good.
I did it for an hour, and TJ was drunk, too.
So TJ was the producer, and he couldn't help me at all.
So what did you rank?
I didn't rank anything.
I was so drunk, I couldn't rank anything.
You were too drunk to rank?
I was too drunk to rank.
I had no list at all.
I just said, all right, guys, call in if you want to talk.
And people called in and I talked.
And that was it. Had a good time.
Enjoyed myself. Yeah, I was the only
mom at the playground burping up liquor
yesterday afternoon. It was rough.
You assume that, yeah. I just, when I kept putting them in the
swing, I'm like, don't you want to swing?
So you could just stand still.
Did you guys get hungover before you fell asleep?
Yes. Oh, that's the worst.
Yep. Little stabby pains in the
stomach just a little i didn't get that i didn't get a headache i was expecting to get a headache
or something but i never got it just fell asleep you smoked that dope yeah you got that you had
the dope run through your fucking veins yeah the dope was good i enjoyed the dope oh yeah do you
do you uh do you take do you smoke weed with like? Not usually, no.
Sometimes, but not usually.
I thought you were a cool dad.
Tommy's allowed to have like 3G and like Delta.
Yeah, yeah.
You let her know.
CBD drops.
Tinctures.
Yeah, you let Tommy have a tincture.
Here and there.
He's good.
What's up, bitches?
Hey, what's up, bitch, bitch?
How you feeling?
I actually felt pretty shitty this morning.
I'm not going to lie.
Yeah. How are you guys feeling? I actually felt pretty shitty this morning. I'm not going to lie. Yeah.
How are you guys feeling?
I feel like shit.
I feel fine now.
I didn't drink enough.
I couldn't do that shit.
My mind is not sharp today at all.
Well, not.
Well, yeah.
Okay.
So it's a day that ends in Y?
All right, yeah, so you're fine.
My mind's just not that sharp,
that's all.
Would you describe yourself as quick as a whip?
I'm not gonna
comment on something that has a whip in it,
no.
Okay.
Lost my touch.
Still hung over.
One of Glennie's girls just walked in.
Yeah, it was pretty.
She was just wearing a piece of rope. Still hung over. One of Glennie's girls just walked in. Yeah, it was pretty.
She was just wearing a piece of rope.
Yeah.
String.
Neon.
Yeah, she was wearing twine fresh off the spool.
It was the twine from that part.
She was looking at my calluses.
Oh, where did they go?
Studying the old calluses?
Yeah.
How are they holding up? Fuck. Nah, we're we're good we're good do we have a prep sheet or steven what's your chili oh yeah how was did you
get kissed did you get kissed i did not i did see a bunch of yak fans there and i was very nervous
every time i saw one of them and i asked them like do you have a coin nobody oh that's you
asked them that's That's normal behavior.
Well, once he put the hit out on me,
and I also heard that there were some back channel hits that were trying to...
What does that mean?
Trying to dox our seats.
It wasn't back channel, I told you.
He said it on the air.
Well, yeah, but then I went with Nate,
and he was like, yeah,
they're trying to get me to tweet out our seats.
No, yeah, I told Nate.
I told you on the air, I was like, yeah, they're trying to get me to tweet out our seats. No, yeah. I told Nate. I was like, I told you on the air.
I was like, Nate, we'll get your seat number.
You're going to get a kiss, boy.
Did you sleep on a curb?
I didn't.
I was close.
What?
Get it over, man.
Well, not really, but like.
You slept in a car?
So I really don't like, I'm not going to say the name of them
because they have advertised with us before,
but I don't like any of these ride-sharing services
that just like surge price the heck out of it.
I live less than 20 miles from MetLife,
and they were trying to charge $175 to go home.
So I was a man of principle.
I was like, absolutely not.
And every...
I started going up to pulled-over cars
and be like,
are you a ride-sharing service? And offering cash, to which I over cars and be like, are you a ride sharing service?
And offering cash, which I got declined.
Holy shit, Steven.
So I actually got home that way.
I've done those makeshift ones.
They're sketchy as hell.
But you mean when you're fucking drunk at 4 a.m., that's what works.
I paid a guy 50 bucks cash to take me home, and he did.
And was he a ride sharing app?
No.
I took a photo of his license plate, and I had it in my drafts.
For what?
In case I got murdered.
Steven, this is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
These guys go to big events and just in their car.
He was a cool guy.
50 bucks, I'll take you home.
In your drafts?
Like in my Twitter drafts.
What was the tweet?
What?
It was just like, I just had the photo of the guy's license plate.
I told him, I was like, hey, I'm going to take a photo of your license plate.
Why in your drafts?
I wasn't going to dox him.
Maybe he was a fine dude.
But why not just save it to your camera roll?
Well, yeah, it was there too, I guess.
Why Twitter draft?
Why not just text it to your wife?
Also, your phone just being in that guy's car is enough to get him implicated.
I mean, I'm sure he would have disposed if he's
a professional enough dude to take me out.
You can track phones or no?
I might have like
a phone disabled. They all can track every
phone. I'm surprised. I don't know what's up.
I've agreed with everything Steven said.
I can't get past the Twitter drafts.
I don't know what that would do.
Twitter drafts, it would be much easier for us
if he died postpartum to get into his drafts than his camera roll.
Why don't you just send us the picture?
Oh.
I don't want this guy's info getting out.
Never go through my drafts.
He had the forethought to do all this in case he got murdered, but the fact that he might have gotten murdered should have stopped him from doing it in the first place.
Dude, $175?
MetLife is a nightmare. They gave me advice to just walk to a rest stop
like two miles north of the stadium
and I did that and then Uber still
wouldn't come.
I got stuck there for hours.
The subway's right there. Why wouldn't you just get on the subway a few stops
and go somewhere?
It is NJ Transit, but to get to my
stop, the trains were done
at that point. But I'm just saying, hop on the subway.
When I go to Mets games and stuff, I hop on the subway sometimes.
I'll go a few stops away where there's less stadium shit, and then I'll get a ride.
Go to Secaucus and get the ride there.
Yeah.
It would take like an hour to get on a train to Secaucus.
Steven, I think the biggest thing, though, is like, so he tweeted like, oh, I hate these
ride sharing apps.
I might just sleep on a curb.
And I said, prove it. I would like to see just sleep on a curb. And I said, prove it.
I would like to see you sleep on a curb.
I've slept in some pretty bad places.
Like?
Probably the worst was Newark Penn Station.
I was asleep on their bench for several hours.
I was woken up by a cop putting a...
That's impressive.
Were you on something?
Nope.
It was cheap.
Too cheap to get a cab.
Several hours?
Yeah.
This was from like... I missed a train and I missed last train.
So it was probably like two to five thirty.
You are a relaxed man.
I don't think you have any anxiety.
Steven is a savage.
I'm restless in my own home.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But I'm made of principle.
I'm not going to pay $175 or something close to that to go 20 miles.
I walked from Blossom Music Center in Cuyahoga Falls to my home in Kent.
I think that was like, I was walking for four hours, I think.
Damn.
I walked once from like pretty far to LAX after the Wisconsin loss at Rose Bowl.
Because I was just like, we stayed an extra day.
And our flights were in the afternoon.
It was like, I don't, what are we going to do all day?
This sucks.
We lost.
So we just walked to LAX.
That was a weird one.
Walking on the side of the-
With your luggage?
Walking to an airport.
Yeah, I just had a backpack.
Yeah, there was a moment-
Walking around an airport is like-
Yeah, there was a moment where it's like, we probably shouldn't be walking now, but
we just kept on walking.
Yeah.
Nobody's stopping around an airport.
No.
No, no, no, no, no.
Well, you see that in Chicago all the time.
People give up on the traffic and they just get out in hordes
and start walking down the highway ramp.
Yeah.
It's crazy.
I kind of want to be one of those guys that does something fun
that goes viral in a big traffic jam.
What about being in a horde?
Jerry!
Get Jerry in here.
We haven't seen him in a while.
Jerry!
A while?
What the hell is that?
He's seething walking.
Yeah, he's angry.
What's he doing?
I don't know.
He's probably about to leave.
What's this guy doing?
One of my boys stole us.
No, I'm not going to say this.
Jerry, come sit down for a minute.
We haven't seen you in a while.
What do you got to do?
Who are you interviewing?
Millies.
Who?
Millies?
Yeah, he's pretty good.
What's his deal?
He's a rapper.
Right.
Ty, what sub-genre?
Huh?
What sub-genre of rap?
I think freestyle rap.
Oh, strictly?
No, he does albums.
He has a good album out right now, Blanco 5.
Blanco 5?
Yeah.
And what was, is he sober?
So his story is pretty much kind of like, you know, selling drugs, growing up in that life.
And then he stopped all that and became a rapper and stuff like that.
Nice.
Overcame some serious things.
Nice.
Yeah, good dude.
We haven't seen you in a while.
Yeah, you know, just been playing golf, stuff like that.
You know, missing a couple days of work here and there.
For golf. Is golf therapeutic or the opposite for you no i think it i think it helps
yeah i think it helps like really frustrated though sometimes yeah
my game has gotten better than breaking anything out of out of hand
so and not on purpose but i i drove the golf cart into the lake. What? When?
Two days ago.
Do you have a picture?
What happens when that happens?
No, so it didn't get fully submerged, but.
Wait, wait, wait.
How do you accidentally do it? Okay, so you know if you're playing golf,
and like in the middle of the fairway,
there'll be like a creek.
You ever see that?
Brandon probably seen it.
Yeah.
Ravine.
I went face down. It felt like an insult
but I don't think it was. No, because he's
played golf.
I have too.
Shot a 72 at Sir Sheena Cock.
Alright, so wait, what happened?
I went face first into the little creek.
You just didn't see it? You didn't see it at all?
I didn't see it, no.
I mean, it's only like a maybe a... It was like a ditch wasn't see it at all? I didn't see it, no. I mean, there's only like a, maybe a...
It was like a ditch, wasn't a creek.
Yeah, like, I don't know.
How big is this, 12 inches?
Is there a bridge?
Yeah, that's 12.
Yeah, that's 12.
I've done the same.
I agree with everything Jerry's saying.
It was like a 12-inch.
Show us 12 again.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's 12.
That was 12.
Show it for the camera with 12 inches.
Yeah, that's 12.
Yeah.
Whatever.
They're not like big, huge creeks.
Was there a bridge?
Yeah, there was to the right, and I didn't see it.
Love it.
So were you only driving with severe tunnel vision?
Like, I only see the hole, and I'm going that way?
I don't know.
When you pretty much hit a good shot, you want to hurry up and get up there and see
where the ball is.
Yeah.
Was it a good shot?
It actually wasn't a good shot.
Oh, that didn't apply at all.
No, it didn't.
You go underwater.
No.
So it's like maybe this is deep.
And so what happened?
How'd you get it out?
They came and pulled it out.
And what did they say?
No, they didn't care, you know?
They didn't?
I play there all the time.
Was it something that happens often there?
You play there all the time?
Is there?
Hold on.
All right. So you've been questioning. You've been the time? Hold on. Yeah, right.
So you've been questioning it.
You've been on the bridge before.
Great question, Nick.
I mean, you forget.
It's 18 holes.
It's a lot of holes.
It's a lot of holes.
Is there a picture?
I want to see you.
I think my cousin Danny might have a picture.
Can we get it?
I'd like to see that.
Can we get the picture?
I'll text him right now.
Get the picture.
I'll ask him to see if he got it.
I want to see the picture. The fact that you had to get the picture? Aw. I'll text him right now. Get the picture. I'll ask him to see if he got it. I want to see the picture.
The fact that you had to get taken out sucks.
It wasn't as, I mean, all four of us pulled it out.
Oh, they didn't have someone come and help?
Well, the starter came, and then he called somebody else, and they came.
We all pulled it out.
So you made a real.
Yeah, but I mean, the starter knows me there.
Did anyone play through?
Actually, no. Oh. Actually, but I mean, the starter knows me there. Did anyone play through? Actually, no.
Actually, no.
That's the worst feeling, being so slow.
I pass people sometimes.
I skip a hole if I need to.
Yeah.
I don't wait for people.
That's a power move.
Yeah.
Junior year of high school, I rode my bike into a pond at a golf course by accident,
but fully underwater.
It was terrifying.
Your bike out? And you were on a bike? A golfing? No, cutting through a golf course by accident, but fully underwater. It was terrifying. You were on a bike
golfing?
No, cutting through a golf course
to get home. That shit happens.
It's funny. Dan, actually,
the guy you know is coming in as well.
He's just a friend of mine.
The guy, the Jumpsuit January
guy, do you remember
from a couple years back, he did something with you?
Mikey Strong?
No, the guy.
The guy.
He did something with you with Jumpsuit January a few years back.
I think it was in January.
Mikey Strong?
That's a name I would remember.
Is that ironic?
I'm pretty sure he did something with you guys.
Is he strong?
He's got big, like not big muscles, but he's in good shape.
Oh, no.
That's like a cancer benefit for a guy named Mark.
Guy's always doing me dirty.
Oh, look at that.
Jerry.
Flames.
A thousand bucks?
I didn't get him for that.
Oh, okay.
Fell off the back of a truck?
No.
How much did you get him for?
I didn't.
You didn't get him?
They're right there.
I didn't buy them.
I won them. Saquon, his didn't buy them. I won them.
Saquon, his manager, bought them.
Oh, nice.
I probably fit those.
For you?
Why?
He's a good friend of mine.
And he's rich as fuck.
Did you give them to Kyle?
Yeah, he paid for dinner when we went out.
He always pays for dinner.
And I offered to pay.
That's why.
I know you didn't offer to pay.
Yes, I did.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
Left two singles on the table.
That's a tip. I definitely offered to pay. You's why I know you didn't offer to pay. Yes, I did. No, you didn't. Yeah, I did. You left two singles on the table. That's a tip.
I definitely offered to pay. You're lying now.
I don't think I'm lying. Where'd you go out to dinner?
Went out to... River Palm.
Yeah, they said it was like the...
Yeah, it was pretty good. It was like the
South of France of New Jersey
is what they were calling it. Yeah.
I mean, he always pays. That's why I like going with him.
Yeah, well, that is... Yeah, free meal. Yeah. I mean, he always pays. That's why I like going with him. Yeah. Well, that is, yeah, free meal.
Always.
Pretty nice.
You got $1,000 shoes on you?
I don't have $1,000 shoes.
What time do you leave in the office tonight?
So I got an interview at 2.
You know, the word around town, you know,
used to be Jersey Jerry leaves at, like, 2 o'clock.
But I don't really leave at 2 o'clock.
You leave at like 3.
No, I don't actually.
I leave around like when you come and sit in here around like 5, I skip out.
Yeah.
I'll never care when you leave.
Thanks, Kyle.
That's nice.
Never care.
Anything else?
I don't want to hold you up.
Big on Bo Nickel?
Yes.
So that's exciting, right? Yeah. What is this? I don't know how the UFC or MMA works. I don't want to hold you up. Big on Bo Nickel? Yes. So that's exciting, right?
Yeah.
What is this?
I don't know how the UFC or MMA works.
I don't know who the opponents are and if there's gigantic mismatches on purpose.
But I think he's going to be a superstar.
I think he's going to be great, too.
You can tell from college wrestling that he was bigger than amateur wrestling.
Oh, yeah.
So he wrestled at Penn State three times, right, Kyle?
What's his name?
Bo Nickel. Oh, Nickel. Yeah, three-time national State three times, right, Kyle? What's his name? Bo Nickel.
Bo Nickel, yeah, three-time national champ.
One of the most exciting.
Yes.
He would do this thing where he would pin a guy in a big match,
like NCAA semis, and then lend the hand, and everyone hated that.
Oh, that's a brutal move.
Can't lend the hand.
Oh, my God, I would hate that so much.
Have you ever had a hand lent to you?
No, that's an unwritten rule.
If you pin someone, you don't help them up.
Yeah, don't go lending hands.
Did anyone fight him after that?
I have to see.
I think it was this Fresno State guy who was also a good football player.
I think he was visibly pissed, but no fights.
Do you think there's a chance, like if you got pinned in wrestling,
if you lost in a wrestling match,
do you think you could maybe beat the guy in a fist fight?
Is that translatable?
No, not at all.
I wish they had to do both.
There's no correlation.
That'd be great.
Oh, that'd be neat, like a double or nothing.
Yeah, right.
All right, box.
Yeah, right.
Start fighting, standing up.
Each round is a different fighting style.
Yeah.
One is just hugging, strictly hugging. Unmixed martial arts. Yeah, is a different fighting style. Yeah. One is just hugging.
Strictly hugging.
Unmixed martial arts.
Yeah.
Wow.
There you go.
Yeah.
Excited for wrestling this season.
Oh, yeah.
This will be big.
You guys got to do.
You reinvigorated my excitement.
You two have to do a podcast together that's just deep into wrestling.
Yeah, we should.
We talked about it.
We should.
I would love to see the two of you at the, what is it?
At the ring.
The Nationals meet.
Yeah.
Yeah, I would go.
I would go on my own just to go.
I would like that funded.
That would be cool.
I'll work on that.
That's great.
I'd like to see both of you.
Please, yeah.
But you have to do all the interviews in singlets?
I'm down.
Kyle?
I'm actually excited to get back in one.
Yeah.
I can start filling out.
I think I'll be ready by winter.
That will be content
I'd like to see.
It is suck.
My quads will be finally ready
when short season is over.
Just wear shorts.
We were supposed to be in singlets
for the first YouTube episode
of this show,
but only Brandon came in it.
That's right.
And I came soaking wet.
Oh my God, you were wet. We had talked about this recently, but it. That's right. And I came soaking wet. Oh my God, you were wet.
We had talked about this recently, but yesterday.
You're very on this show.
Jerry, did you get us anything for $100,000?
Well, yesterday I said congrats.
Yeah, that's true.
Oh, there's the wet Kyle.
Was that the first YouTube episode?
Yeah, that's wet Kyle right there.
I kind of missed the big desk.
I do too.
I don't.
Really?
I don't like it. The seats were high. I hate this miss the big desk. I do too. I don't. Really? I don't like it.
The seats were high.
I hate this region being.
Yeah, I know.
I wouldn't mind getting a big desk.
We could always.
In Chicago, we can do whatever we want.
Jerry's moving too.
I didn't say that.
You're thinking it.
Nah.
Are you?
Who is?
I think everyone here.
Kate?
Erica asked me the other day. Oh, really? She was like, I heard you're moving to Chicago. And I was like, I don everyone here. Kate? Eric asked me the other day.
Oh, really?
He was like, I heard you're moving to Chicago.
And I was like, I don't know.
I don't know what I'm supposed to say.
But yeah, I would.
I'll go anywhere.
Anywhere?
I'll go anywhere.
I think Chaps has talked about it, too.
Out of San Antonio?
Yeah.
He might wind up in the boonies of Maine now.
Yeah.
Who knows where he'll wind up.
No, I think there's a lot of people who are going to be making the move.
We're going to have a pretty nice office.
Yeah.
I'm going to make it.
I basically was like, you know, dude, perfect.
I want that.
Yes.
Yes.
They did a Rube Goldberg video.
Brandon, you know that, right?
I know.
Yeah.
My only demand has been like, I'll drive anywhere to work as long as we have a full court.
Right.
Asphalt court.
Perfect lives a dream.
Dude, we can do so much shit.
It's just all still ideas and concepts.
They're starting to look.
There's stuff in the world.
Yes, and I've given that.
That's like pretty much my only, you know, we'll obviously have some really good studio
spaces too, but I was like, we need space.
Oh, yes.
Golf simulator.
Yeah, that's cool as hell.
I love it.
I think they were trying to put a golf simulator here, but we didn't have enough space. Oh, yes. Golf simulator. Yeah, that's cool as hell. I think they were trying to put
a golf simulator here, but we didn't
have enough space. We will have enough space
there. We don't have enough space for a golf simulator.
I need to find a good one. It measured it out.
Pittsburgh. Yeah. Pittsburgh has a what?
Oh, virtual.
I went to the Chelsea Piers and saw.
I'm out on those, I feel. I don't
think the tech's quite there. Are we out on?
Golf simulators. I don't know. My's quite there. Are we out on? I said, but I... Ball simulators.
I don't know.
My favorite part of the golf would be like being outside.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like with my friends.
Should we get a bowling alley?
Yeah.
I want a bouldering wall.
I want to be able to climb a wall.
Ooh, okay.
With a pad.
I'm not going to climb a wall.
I want to get into that, too.
Yeah.
I won't do it.
I want to look at it, though.
Aesthetically sick.
It's just like, wow, that company's doing well.
Yeah.
The bouldering wall.
That is true. That is kind of the sign of a good company when, that company's doing well. Yeah. The bouldering wall. That is true.
That is kind of the sign of a good company
when you have a big climbing wall.
Google, that was when they made it.
I don't know.
Yeah, Google definitely does.
Google probably does.
Let's look at Google's campus.
I want to see what we should do.
That big circle there, right?
We can get a slide, like Clemson.
We can get a slide.
I would love a slide.
We have one of those big ropes
you use to have to climb in gym classes on TV.
Don't give me a big rope.
Yep.
Yep, we can have that.
Oh, that's...
What is that?
This is a guy that posts these videos,
and no one can tell if it's a simulator or a real place.
How is that not a real place?
Doesn't it look like a simulator?
No, but it's a real place, too.
It's got to be a real place.
That looks uncanny.
It looks weird.
It doesn't...
Where is this ball going?
That can't be his ball.
That's not a person.
Oh.
It's a robot?
That was like a render.
There's a robot on TikTok.
That's fake.
Have we ever talked about her?
What?
Have you seen her?
The TikTok robot?
Oh.
There's a girl in LA with like 4 million followers.
Yeah, there's like AI pop stars now. What? Yeah. They have big followings. We're already there? Oh. There's a girl in LA with like 4 million followers. Yeah, there's like AI pop stars now.
What?
Yeah.
They have big followings.
We're already there?
Yeah.
Yes.
Who gets their money?
I guess the people who create the robots.
I think it's fake.
I don't know.
I've got to go sign on my farm in Elburn soon.
What?
What?
Are you playing a game?
Mm-hmm.
Playing a game?
No, my farm in Chicago.
What is that?
You bought a farm in Chicagoago is that did you actually
you're looking at one i am looking at one i don't know how far you're just collecting houses yeah
i don't know how far i can live out and actually still work there uh you could you could live
pretty far out and it also becomes like like rural isish pretty quickly.
Yeah.
You could probably commute from Gary, Indiana.
I want a farm.
Definitely can. Yeah, Gary.
I go the other direction.
For tax reasons?
You definitely can.
Indiana's a tax haven?
I'm pretty sure it's better taxes, yeah.
You need to run a city.
A Sim City?
I didn't get enough credit yesterday
and you got credit and it was bullshit.
For what?
Yesterday Nick said, name a city that's 100,000 population.
I said Davenport, Iowa, and I said Kenosha, Wisconsin, off the rip.
Did you?
And nobody said anything, and then you came in.
How would we know?
You said New Haven.
They're like, oh, this guy's the king.
Wait, but were you right?
Did we look it up?
Kenosha's 99.7.
Wow.
Davenport, 101.
Wow.
Brandon.
All right, let me try to get closer.
Credit to Brandon.
I can't.
Maybe Kennewick, Washington.
Brandon, credit to you.
Thank you.
You deserve the credit for that.
That's really impressive.
Davenport and Kenosha.
I had residents of both reach out to me and say, you nailed it.
Damn.
Davenport's only 100?
August Philly when that conversation came out.
August Philly?
I mean, Boston has like 200,000, 300,000.
Philly's got like 1.5 million.
Boston only has 200,000 people?
No.
Boston has like 300,000.
It depends on what you call.
That's the thing with the cities.
It depends on what you call the actual city.
There's some stat about New York that's like,
if you took away...
You're the third biggest city.
You're a third off. If you took away
what was it?
Brooklyn would be like the fifth biggest
city by itself.
Brooklyn, Bronx, and
Queens.
So that's what I was thinking with Philly.
Boston has nearly 700,000.
Philly's got
1.5. Boston gets much lower
because there are so many colleges
there's like during the summer the population is true it doesn't account for that i don't think
i don't think the census does students um jerry what else you got you got that picture
uh no response yet what's danny doing i don't fucking know he doesn't work
big cat you mentioned dude perfect You see their new videos?
Just a Rube Goldberg?
What?
Where they're eating?
Oh, damn it.
They've done a Rube Goldberg before.
Let's be fair to Dude Perfect.
They've done a lot of them.
Oh, I did see this one, and it was pretty fucking crazy.
Yeah, this is cool.
Aren't they doing something with Thursday Night Football or something?
Yeah, they're doing a thing.
So we need to do one of these, but it's just like the dumbest things.
I kind of want to go be one of them.
Like I chug a beer and then I piss in Brandon's mouth.
That is a Rube Goldberg.
He shits on Jerry.
He had to stop the ball.
He had to stop it.
That's not right.
That didn't really impress me much.
A human Rube Goldberg?
No, but what he just did was bullshit.
He stopped the ball.
Yeah, because then nothing else mattered before.
If he was just going to hit the ball on a stop.
Yeah, there's another one.
Yeah, this doesn't fucking count.
This isn't a Rube Goldberg.
This is a compilation.
I want Brandon to be in one of those balls, and he's the one who.
Yeah.
Pickleball?
That was a good shot.
But also maybe some interesting editing.
A lot of cuts.
They set this up with a Rube Goldberg YouTuber that came and helped them build this.
Cody's blindfolded.
What's he going to do?
Going to hit the shot blindfolded?
Mark, is that saturated already?
He's great at this.
Rube, Tuber.
Cody's good at this?
Yeah, Cody.
All right, thank you, Jerry.
Great to see you.
Oh, wait.
Send me the picture if you get it.
So this style of human is back in.
They're back in.
Kids love them.
No, like,
irony,
deprecation,
and nihilism out.
This in?
This in.
Yeah.
That's the new wave.
He stopped at two.
This thing's 10 minutes long?
This isn't,
this is just,
oh God.
This is just a bunch of,
Nick, he's getting mad.
This is just a bunch of things.
Turn it off.
I need to...
If we did this, we'd be having an orgy afterwards.
Oh, my God.
That's the end of the Rube Goldberg.
What are we going to do?
The last piece of it unzips your pants.
Oh, man.
Yeah, but look there.
That's in their gym.
Yeah, I know. This is what their gym. Yeah, I know.
This is what we need.
We need to shove up.
I love those.
I'm back.
I'm back.
I'm back.
That's cool.
Damn it.
Oh, big off on switch.
Off fan.
What is that?
Panda.
Oh, boy.
Oh, I thought it was.
Oh, smoke ring.
The hell?
Those fucking guys.
Human interference. They have too much fun. It's not fair. Oh, smoke ring? The hell? These fucking guys.
They have too much fun.
It's not fair.
Our job sucks.
Our job sucks.
And this gets like 20 million watches on YouTube?
Oh, Brandon.
He has three, which is low for them.
Three?
Yes.
My kids love them. Where's this going?
I need to take them to the
live tour, but I never can.
My son's starting to get into it, Brandon.
Where is their office at? Frisco.
Yeah, Frisco.
Me and my daughter saw two of these.
How was it? We saw him at...
I didn't love the ending.
That wasn't the end. It was like ten minutes long.
Wait, what? There's another one.
There's two. This was the food one.
I was watching this on TikTok last night and i did laugh it was enjoyable
i hate them but it's all jealousy oh yeah i am 100 jealous all of my hate stems from jealousy
yeah everybody i hate i want to be them yeah well who are some people that I don't want to be.
You have none.
I did see the picture of Dougs and Frank first class.
Yeah, right up front.
Looking real comfy.
Did you see the picture of Sass?
Oh yeah, Sass has two and a half hours to go.
Should we call him?
I guess he's there by now because that was two and a half hours ago.
Yeah, let's call Sass.
He demanded to drive, I believe. Yeah, he did not want
anybody else to drive. If I were with him, I would do that too.
That is why.
What?
There's a lot of silence out there.
How much property are you buying, Brandon?
As much as I can get.
Are you a tycoon? I'm not I can get. Are you a tycoon?
I'm not a tycoon. Are you a tycoon?
No, I'm not a tycoon.
Can you tell me how much Brandon makes?
Are you about to build a railway system?
Yeah, what is going on? I think it's going on.
Are you a tycoon? I'm not a tycoon.
You're trying to be a tycoon.
It's not my choice to move to Chicago. The job's going to
Chicago, so I'm going to go buy a place.
If you buy a farm, you should put a par 3 course on it.
Ooh.
I should do that. Yeah.
I should do that.
Okay.
Don't be selfish. Okay, I won't.
How many little old grandmothers sitting on their porch
if you snatched up their property?
Oh my god, they're the easiest too.
Get them some sweet tea.
Sign right here.
Take them a mess of fish and fry it up for them.
Just sign this real quick. You don't need to read it.
Talk a little Civil War with them.
We don't want to get lawyers involved.
Are you?
You would make it public if you were a millionaire.
You would say it the second that
you got the seventh digit.
You would let everyone know.
Constantly. I can't. Yes, I plan to. You're not – but you would let everyone know. Constantly.
I can't – yes, I plan to, yeah.
He's got a big ticker in his house.
Yeah.
It's actually been the worst summer of my life.
Yeah?
Oh, yeah.
I haven't had a house in two months.
Sass is on.
You had a home.
Oh, Sass.
What's up?
How you doing?
Good. Just got to the hotel.
Yeah, and?
Yeah, great drive.
I drove the whole way.
Me and Graham got to spend some quality time together.
Good, nice.
How's the hotel?
Yeah.
Wait, was it just you and him?
No, I got a couch in my room.
Yeah, no, it was me, him, and the Mean Girl team.
For three hours?
What'd you guys talk about
or listen to are you allowed to master me and graham talk about guy shit for the most part
yeah like motorcycles what's guy shit we're talking about off beating off yeah um what it
would be like they were there they were just brainstorming ideas the entire time. Wild.
And what do we got?
What's the big winner?
They'd make a TikTok, and then they would make a TikTok.
And that was basically the entire trip.
Did you steal some ideas for us?
Yeah, what do we got?
What's working?
They're thinking about adding a wheel to their show.
Smart. That's a good idea.
That's really smart.
That's really fucking smart.
We invented it. It's invented gonna be called the sex
wheel oh fuck wheel we should have a wheel just once spencers have that i totally have a wheel
yeah i wouldn't yeah when are you getting in uh you've asked us like 45 times uh tomorrow
like an hour before the fight he's walking in a suit and he's walking out.
I thought you were coming in.
I thought you were coming tonight.
I got a room with two beds.
Nah.
Nah.
Although, I do think I have to bunk up with someone on Friday night.
You're not flying back?
We're flying to Saratoga because Dave, Elio, Jerry, and I are going to the races on Saturday, and I only could get two rooms, both with double beds,
but I think it's me, Rudy, Spider, and Jerry.
So who should I?
Rudy.
All right, so all right, all right, all right.
Here's my thought process.
Rudy is the clear 1-1.
Spider is the best just because I love Spider.
Jerry would definitely be the most for content.
Sure.
Jerry would do something that I would definitely be able to videotape and make funny.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So it's, I don't know.
Depends what you want.
Yeah.
If you want peace, I would say Spider.
He'll be in there the least.
Spider would probably, knowing Spider and how good of a dude he is, we'd check we'd check in he'd be like oh there's only two beds for the two of us
i'll just sleep in the hallway yeah yeah you need a bed for your luggage yeah yeah you would say he
was hey are you going out you're staying over on friday no no in saratoga you missed that part
we're flying to saratoga after the fight oh okay all right all right cool cool hey cat imagine telling all the homies that like
hey you see that guy over there and it's rudy i like i slept with him sash you could do some
stand-up at saratoga i actually want to get him a stand-up spot tonight do it huntington in no
in boone county oh god um i think that would be amazing. Sass, do it.
Do it, Sass.
I'll pay you.
Me?
I'll pay you whatever you would make doing one in New York.
I don't know anyone here.
Do they even have comedy clubs here?
We could set it up.
You don't think they have humor in West Virginia?
Let me find a place in Boone.
Yeah, can you search, TJ, can you search Boone County?
Madison, Madison WV, and they won't have comedy clubs,
but I'm sure like a local bar would let him.
Have a club, yeah.
Do a set.
Okay, thanks, Sass.
Appreciate you, Sass.
Wait.
Oh, there's the six best comedy spots in West Virginia
We have a funny bone club here
Next door
What?
Yeah
I mean, you have to
Permanently closed
Oh, that was a good one
Yeah
Get him a spot at Melty's
I can get you in Melty's.
All right, Sass, have fun.
I can't wait to see you tomorrow, and you're going to be like,
when do you get in?
No.
Oh.
No.
Sass, did you break the news to the girls?
About what?
Your uniform.
Oh, yeah, I told them. them okay sass forgot his uniform oh damn sass you are the the worst manager of all time there's never been a worse manager
i don't know i don't know what to wear
did i manifest oj Mayo being on the plane?
Yes, you did.
Whoa.
All right, Sass, we'll see you.
Oh, yeah, you did.
Did you see O.J. Mayo?
Did you see O.J. Mayo, Sass?
Didn't she say she saw him?
Yeah, I did.
Where was he, on your plane?
That was crazy, Kyle.
Going to Cincinnati?
Is he going to the fight?
He was sitting next to Alex Bennett.
Is he going to the fight?
I don't know.
Yeah. You did manifest that. Alex made Graham move so that he could sit there. He was sitting next to Alex Bennett. Is he going to the fight? I don't know. No.
You did manifest that.
Alex made Graham move so that he could sit there.
Wow.
Wait, so how?
Oh, wait.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
How'd that come out?
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Alex made Graham leave first class?
So she could sit next to OJ?
Yeah.
Poor Graham.
Where was OJ's seat?
Jesus fucking Christ.
Oh, my God.
OJ had a coach seat, and Graham had to sit there.
Shut up.
And OJ got to sit there.
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
It was a joke.
Okay, it was a joke.
It was a joke.
I was riffing.
I was just trying to riff with you guys.
Okay, all right.
That's our fault, actually.
I believe that I believed it.
I was eager that you said that yesterday.
I just thought of a random athlete.
He played for Huntington.
I didn't think he would ever go to the rough and rowdy, but.
Maybe he is.
Maybe he's just going to Cincinnati.
All right, CSS.
I'll see you, boy.
O.J. Mayo, probably like the most disappointing on coolest name.
Oh, yeah.
He had a good career.
He made a lot of money, but his name's O.J. Mayo.
He should have been all time.
Starling Castro.
He was like one tier below LeBron.
I liked Quincy Doobie.
Yeah, Quincy Doobie.
Quincy Doobie was supposed to be a teammate of mine.
Amos Zaroway.
TBT, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Amos, Amos, Amos.
He was good in college. I don't know what he did. For the Steel Amos Zaroway. TBT, yeah. Oh, yeah. Amos, Amos, Amos. He was good in college.
I don't know what he did.
For the Steelers, pretty well.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, that's a good.
We should, like, coolest names that just didn't do it for us.
Rudy Gay.
Yeah.
Remember when Rudy Gay and Kevin Love were?
Noshaw Marino.
Yeah.
Noshaw Marino. At the draft? Noshaw Marino was a good one. Noshaw Marino, yeah. N-D-E-B. Rudy Gay and Kevin Love were... No Sean Moreno. Yeah. No Sean Moreno.
At the draft.
No Sean Moreno was a good one.
No Sean Moreno, yeah.
NDEB.
Top ten picks.
No Sean Moreno.
Georgia running back.
Did the dive for Georgia and then him crying on the post.
Alligator tears.
You were in a Reebok commercial with him.
I was.
I was.
Can we pull up the Reebok commercial? I watched this. You were in a commercialbok commercial with him. I was. I was. Can we pull up the Reebok commercial?
I watched this.
It was.
You were in a commercial with No Sean Moreno?
I didn't tape with him, but he was in the commercial.
This commercial is unbelievable.
It was one of the weirdest things.
Can you explain it?
Okay.
What the fuck was that?
What year is it?
What year?
I want to say it was 2014-ish. And some dude who was like the producer of the Reebok commercial
was a big stoolie and hit me up and was like,
do you want to be in this Reebok commercial?
I was like, yeah.
And Hank and I flew to Dallas.
I think we got paid like, I don't know if we got paid.
Did we get paid?
I think we might have gotten paid like a thousand bucks.
And there was also a good spread of barbecue.
I remember that vividly.
So that was worth it in its own right.
And I did one scene where I tried to steal someone's shoes and then got kicked by Johnny Hendricks.
Hendricks.
And I had like a stunt coordinator teach me how to get kicked.
Really?
Yeah, let's watch it.
I did not know this.
Here's No Sean.
Commercial is actually pretty funny because does he cry in it?
No, he doesn't.
Johnny Hendricks.
So I didn't tape with Allie or No Sean.
They weren't even there.
They weren't there.
They did it.
Johnny won.
Yeah.
Hey!
There's kids in this neighborhood!
Maniacs!
Oh.
Because he's running so fast because he shoots.
Yeah.
I thought she was racist.
Is he ready?
Mm-hmm.
Sweet.
That was me.
That wasn't you, was it? That was me, yeah.
I feel like she should have done that better. That was me. That wasn't you, was it? That was me, yeah. Hi.
I feel like she should have done that better.
Fresh off the Olympics.
Hey, man.
How's it going?
Hey.
Hey, my dude.
Yeah.
That was quick. That was you taking that bomb? Unnaturally quick. There's my line. Yeah. Ugh. Ugh. Here you go.
That was quick.
That was you taking that bump?
Unnaturally quick.
There's my line.
I said it like 75 times.
Naturally quick.
Yeah, I took the real bump.
I'm a fucking...
You didn't have a stunt double?
Oh, they gave me...
Hold on, pause it right before.
That was quick.
He kicks me.
Unnaturally quick.
There it is.
That's really quick.
They gave me like a vest that I wore that he kicked the vest.
But I had a real stunt coordinator like teach me how to take a bump.
No disrespect, but was this like a summer intern like commercial competition?
I don't know.
Yeah, because like Hank and I remember being so excited.
And at the end, we're like,, alright, can't wait for it to be
on TV and they're like, oh. Oh no.
It's not going on TV. Where was it?
That looks like homemade. Yeah, I've never seen
this. It was just online.
And the lighting's bad. Yeah, they got good
athletes. Alright, yeah, watch me
take this bump.
Oh!
That was quick.
Unnaturally quick.
I did this line so many times.
And it was like, it was similar to the Seinfeld.
That's your pillow talk as well.
As we were going to do the commercial, I was just practicing the line with Hank.
I was like, unnaturally quick?
Unnaturally quick.
Unnaturally quick.
In many ways.
Yeah.
Was Hendrix ever a household name?
He was good for...
That was obviously right around his peak, I would say.
I think he had...
Did he hold a belt at any point?
He fought GSP and should have won the decision,
but they...
I don't know.
It was a bad decision.
And then he had a bunch of problems making weight
and then kind of faded into obscurity.
Him and Cormier.
That's my commercial.
That's fun.
That's fun.
I'm surprised you haven't had more cameos and stuff.
In random things.
I mean, I went on Bar Rescue twice.
Oh, you also showed up in the documentary.
I forgot.
Was that a year and a half ago?
I did an interview for the Stone Cold.
Oh, yeah.
And then I, this is how stupid I am that like I'll just sign anything.
So they did the DX documentary.
I got a bunch of tweets being like, oh, you're in the DX documentary.
I was like, what?
And then I realized like three months ago someone came from the top four, third floor,
and was like, here, can you sign this real quick?
And I was like, sure.
I was signing away the rights to use the clips from the stone cold for the dx okay oh yeah i just
totally forgot whoops yeah that's neat yeah that was cool i didn't watch it yet let me know how it
is oh i will yeah there i am um Remember that from the Austin shoot? Right.
Remember the day you did the Austin shoot?
Same clip.
Yeah.
Erica emails us telling Penn.
Oh, yeah.
Purchase.
Yeah.
What's that all about?
We're out of jobs.
No.
I mean, this was always the plan when they bought us initially three years ago that they were going to.
Yeah.
If everything went well, they they were gonna finish the purchase i did enjoy seeing the tweet last night saying that they're
buying the rest of us and everyone just being like barstool's dead yep yeah that's it it's like
this is this has literally been the plan since they bought us great photo if everything yeah
if everything went well they would finish the. I think it was announced in the initial purchase.
But yeah, everyone was freaking out and was like, it's over.
Yeah.
You guys are gone.
Dave's out.
Bye-bye.
It's kind of over, though, isn't it?
No, I mean, I still have many years left. We're going to get a bouldering wall, Brian.
Yeah, fuck.
You stupid idiot.
I want a lazy river, too.
That's my ultimate dream.
What you guys don't realize is with the Chicago office
Every cool thing that we add
I'm going to have to add another year to my contract
So I'm just going to end up signing a lifetime contract
So we can get
We'll get a ping pong table
Yes, I'm willing to do that
I'm going to negotiate against myself
But if you get enough cool shit for the rest of your life
I won't own the office
That's still great
Yeah, no, I agree, but it definitely will be a point
where I'm just going to have to start signing years away
with the fulfillment of the group.
It'd be tough, but good content.
If you sunk so much money into the office,
you have to move your family in there and raise them there as well.
The cameraman would have to hook his foot underneath the tube to...
The cameraman who was also the social intern
for the sportsbook at La Verge Lake Charles.
Look at him.
Ben made him go in the river with him.
Wait, is he there right now?
No.
Kate said lazy river.
Oh, okay.
It looks like he's having an extremely hard time staying balanced.
Look, you can see the cameraman has to keep his foot under his tube to keep from floating away.
He looks like he can't even stay on the raft.
Yeah, this is like the pornos when you see a boom might.
Vince would be exhausted after the lazy river.
He is.
He's winded.
Also, I'm not going to tell Mincy how to do his job because he is the king of the south.
But as a fat guy, I don't know if that's the angle you want.
Well, he's Farley.
He's Chris Farley.
He's not the level of Chris Farley. in the farley ever will be um he said you gotta stay like chris
he's got time to catch up like i think when we did a we did a rundown in dustin pejoria's pool
once i think i never had my my neck go above the water line for the entire rundown like you gotta
you gotta stay low you gotta stay under the water even in the shallow yeah you. You got to stay low. You got to stay under the water.
Even in the shallow.
Yeah, you have to stay under the water
if you're Mincy there.
I'll teach him.
I can't teach him.
You can't.
You can't.
That guy's got it all.
Fuck it.
Did you see he's selling
Mincy Land Delight shirts?
No, no, no.
Did you see?
He's going to split the merch bonus
with the guy that wrote
and performed the song.
It was our idea?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was our idea, yeah.
But he's...
Okay.
Yeah, that's fine.
Yeah.
That actually makes sense.
And in Shady Rays?
We had to do the Shady Rays and let's spin the wheel.
I think we just need a picture of me looking fucking fresh in my Shady Rays yesterday.
You're looking so chill.
They have the essentials that...
Kate, relax.
Shady Rays has the essentials you need to make summer complete.
Their sunglasses offer an industry-best combination of fit, style, and performance
without the big brand price tag.
It doesn't stop at the quality.
They offer the most insane protection program in all of eyewear.
Every pair is backed up by lost and broken replacements.
If you lose or break your pair, even on day day one they will send you a brand new pair wear with
confidence because shady rays has your back long after you purchase if you don't love them exchange
for a new pair returning for free within 30 days exclusively for yak listeners shady rays is giving
out their best their very best deal of the season go to shady ShadyRays.com. Use code YAK for 50% off two plus pairs of polarized sunglasses.
I have them.
I wore them to the beach this morning to go for a walk, and it was wonderful.
Wow.
You went to go walk on the beach this morning?
Mm-hmm.
Well.
What?
I went towards the beach to take a walk.
I didn't make it all the way to the beach.
Sun too hot?
No, I just walked along the boardwalk for a minute and then walked back.
What's going on here?
What's Jack doing?
What do we got? Jack, what are you doing?
Why are you in there?
Can you hear me? Yeah.
What's up, guys?
Zaz right back
for Arsenal just tweeted at me, so I was
just talking to him about it. Oh, nice.
I thought you came in here with some news.
No news. That is news.
That's news.
No news from my perspective.
Have you guys noticed bugs everywhere?
Yeah.
Oh, I've noticed it way more.
It's crazy.
Just keep an eye out for that, guys.
You were right.
Oh, he was right.
And he was so right that Jack is extra right
that Barstool's in on it with the most dangerous game.
It's crazy.
I think the NWO paid us off.
Yeah.
That was just a bug buffet for an entire week that people were like,
oh, the crickets don't sound so bad.
Yeah, and it's like you can have them in smoothies.
Yeah.
God damn it.
He's right.
He's right.
He's right.
He usually is.
Yeah, they hired the Neighborhood Eats guy to commentate on bugs.
Yeah.
Makes you think.
Yeah. Even Sass Makes you think. Yeah.
Even Sass, the scorpion wasn't that bad.
Yeah.
Sass not complaining about something.
And you know it's not that bad.
Yeah.
All right, should we spin the wheel?
I think so.
Brandon, who's the most famous person from Point Pleasant?
I have no clue whatsoever.
I haven't looked into Point Pleasant at all.
She was in Jumanji.
Nothing.
The new one or the old one?
Old.
Oh, that little girl?
I don't remember.
Pretty famous.
I don't know who was in Jumanji.
Robin Williams was in Jumanji.
Oh, yeah.
Wasn't her.
R.I.P.
R.I.P.
I was kind of fucked up you brought.P. I was going to fuck up. You brought that up?
Who was it, Kyle?
Kirsten Dunst.
Oh.
You used Jumanji as her movie?
I didn't want to give it away.
I wanted to make you think.
Fair enough.
What would Kirsten Dunst's movie be?
I'd say the first Spider-Man.
Oh.
Right?
Yeah, that would be easy.
I don't know.
There's others, right?
Where they kiss and they're spit-stuck together.
Isn't that her and Sarah Michelle Gellar?
Oh, yeah.
Or am I thinking of the wrong person?
Things I Hate About You?
No.
No.
Oh, you're thinking of Cruel Intentions, but that wasn't her.
Oh.
That was Reese Witherspoon.
Reese Witherspoon.
Kirsten Dunst married Jesse Plemons.
I love Reese Witherspoon. What? Reese Witherspoon. Kirsten Dunst married Jesse Plemons. I love Reese Witherspoon.
Reese Witherspoon married Ryan Phillippe.
Reese Witherspoon has a daughter that looks just like Reese Witherspoon.
Just like her.
Internet life gave her Plemons.
Yeah, you're right.
In 2000, I thought Reese Witherspoon was the most beautiful person on earth.
That's a fair take.
Would she bring it on?
Oh, that was Kirsten Dunst.
That was Kirsten. Who do you think was the most beautiful woman on earth? Reese Witherspoon. She's still beautiful person on Earth. That's a fair take. Would she bring it on? Oh, that was Chris Dutz. That was Chris Dutz.
Who do you think was the most beautiful woman on Earth?
Reese Witherspoon.
She's still beautiful.
She is.
I just do love whenever the internet sees her and her daughter
and they're like, your daughter looks exactly like you.
People being shocked by that pisses me off.
Yeah.
It's how it works.
There's like 70 people that look exactly like me
and 1,000 that look exactly like you.
The only funny one is when Dan Marino, I think,
had a child out of wedlock and the kid looked exactly like Dan Marino and he was like, no, that look exactly like you. The only funny one was when Dan Marino, I think, had a child out of wedlock,
and the kid looked exactly like Dan Marino, and he was like, no, that's not my kid.
Wait, really?
I'm pretty sure either that or was it Arnold?
Arnold.
Arnold also.
Yeah.
I think Dan Marino might as well.
I know Arnold does.
Oh, yeah, we did the Arnold one one day.
Arnold, yeah, it's like that's Arnold Schwarzenegger's kid.
He's like, no, it's not.
Brandon, you know who else is from Point Pleasant?
I don't.
Paige Joseph Falkenberg Jr.
Oh, Diamond Dallas Paige.
Correct.
Oh, I've been DMing him.
I've got to send him some Barstool gear, a Barstool hat.
Wow, what show would he ever fucking come on?
He wanted to.
He was about to be on a show and then didn't quite make it,
but maybe we were bringing it back.
You giving DDP Yoga a try?
So in exchange for free DDP Yoga, I'm giving him some Barstool merch.
So that's what I'm doing.
It's DDP Yoga.
Thank you, Kate.
I don't know.
I'd like to know more.
It's his workout system he calls DDP Yoga.
Double penetration.
Okay.
Oh, whoa.
Okay. Downward dog. It. Oh, whoa. Okay.
Downward dog.
It's Diamond Dallas Page.
Okay.
That was close.
The wrestler.
WWE or the other one?
It was in WCW back in the 90s.
He ended up in WWE, but he wasn't as famous. Famous. He's known for rescuing wrestlers that have gone over the edge and are drugged out.
And he goes and gets them, puts them on yoga, and gives them a better life.
That's his thing now.
Jerry should have him on.
Yeah.
If Jerry got him on his show before I got him on wrestling, I would not.
Was wrestling still?
We're in talks.
Oh.
Yeah.
Would you like me to enter the talks?
You didn't enter them last time.
I'll enter them now.
I've been waiting for the opportunity to get back in.
We had the opportunity the first time when they canceled it like fucking idiots.
I must have missed that online.
All right, Spinny, I think we're fucked today. Yeah, I think. I was going missed that online. I think we're fucked today.
I felt a feeling in the air this morning.
Yep.
Oh, yeah.
Holy shit.
Wow, that would have been such a downer.
That doesn't bode well for tomorrow.
No, I'm not going to be here either.
Look at that.
What, you're here?
I'm not here tomorrow.
Oh, fuck.
Huh?
That thing's getting...
I mean, if you'll tell me, just call me.
I'll get wet or I'll start my fast or I'll...
It's an even wheel now.
Wow.
Have we ever had an even wheel?
Seven dry, seven non-dry.
We keep a double Ritz forever?
You know what would be awesome?
Wheel reset.
Wheel reset.
I'd be like, hell yeah.
Hell yeah.
Did you guys see that Dodgers guy who broke his arm going down the slide?
Oh, crap.
Oh, crap.
Play the video.
It's so fucking funny.
I know, he said, holy crap.
It's so fucking funny.
I didn't see it.
Oh, wait, is this the announcer?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn't see it, but I heard about it. Oh, it's so fucking funny. I know, he said holy crap. It's so fucking funny. I didn't see it. Oh, wait, is this the announcer? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I didn't see it, but I
heard about it.
Oh, it's so fucking funny.
That's not a very
difficult slide.
No, it was very clear
that he was a guy who's
just never been on a
slide.
Yeah.
I don't know why he
wanted to go on a slide.
Slides are so easy.
They're so easy.
What makes a slide
difficult?
Watch.
Is that no more?
Yeah.
Watch.
All right, here we go.
I mean, that's a big slide.
Holy crap.
Holy crap.
Holy crap.
Oh, God.
That was pathetic.
Nobody's.
That was not hard.
Look.
First, I want to report that he's okay.
Keep playing.
Keep playing.
Oh, I hate seeing that.
Oh, yeah.
She hurt him.
Yeah, look at this.
David Benassi has been talking.
He got his cast.
They released another angle of it.
Did you see that?
There's a second angle of it now.
Oh, shit.
You see him hit.
Holy crap.
Holy crap.
Oh, man. Get him hit. Holy crap! Holy crap!
Oh, man.
Get hard.
Holy crap!
Holy crap!
How did he not know that the slide ends?
He is going pretty good, though.
He's going fast.
I can't watch this.
What, he broke his arm? I think the way, the angle with which he hit the wall.
Oh, God.
Rastring six ribs?
Damn.
Oh, my God.
I used to hate guys like this, but get him off.
Get him out of sports.
He shouldn't be allowed to be on that field.
No.
Oh, I feel so bad for him.
He looks in good spirits, though.
Six ribs. I've broken a bunch of ribs, and for him. You look in good spirits, though. Six ribs.
I've broken a bunch of ribs, and one sucks.
You've broken ribs?
I've broken multiple.
I used to play rugby.
On multiple occasions?
Oh, yeah, multiple occasions.
Would you suck your own dick after that?
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Yes.
Is it women?
Oh, 100%.
I never even thought about that.
100%.
We never asked that question.
Would they try to suck him?
No.
You always did the Marilyn Manson sucks his own dick,
but would women eat their own pussy?
No, they're more flexible.
That's like an extra two and a half inches to pick up for.
Yeah, true.
Not if you got a giant clit.
Yeah.
True, that's also true.
We didn't drop that word enough on you lately.
Would that be hot?
I think to watch?
No. No, yes, because it would be summer salt. It would be hot? I think. To watch? No.
No, yes.
Because it would be, in the summer, it would be hot.
You wouldn't be able to see anything.
You hear them moan while eating?
Would they moan?
Because their mouth is full.
It's enough just to know.
My knee-jerk reaction is, yes, hot. But I don't know.
I don't think so.
I mean, you could really make yourself queef pretty easy.
Just blow a little air in there and go to town.
Queef in your own mouth.
That'd be a niche.
I mean, Stephen, if you had a pussy, would you be able to make yourself cum?
Definitely.
Shit.
You're right. He's right. He's absolutely right. God're right.
He's right.
He's absolutely right.
God damn it.
What are y'all taking pictures in there for?
It's be real time.
What is be real?
I hate be real.
I don't understand.
So it's an app that everyone that has it one time each day gets the same notification that it's time to be real.
And then you take a picture.
You have to take a picture in a time limit. Your front and back camera take at the same notification that it's time to be real and then you take a picture. You have to take a picture in a time limit.
Your front and back camera take at the same
time and if you're late it just tells everyone you're late.
What if you're taking a shit? You gotta be real
baby. I like that.
That's a good idea. Dissolved quickly.
Now people just wait until they're doing the
funnest part of their day and post it.
And they're not real? I thought you had to do it
at a certain time. They'll say that you're
late if you're late. No, it just tells you when you posted right okay
yeah it's kind of fun yeah i should get that everyone just keeps like hank just keeps taking
it out just taking a picture of me i'm like what's going on well that's what happened one night i
thought i was accepting friend requests but i was actually adding everybody uh i have a bunch of
people i didn't like need so yeah, I have Hank on there.
He just always sees what I'm doing.
Beeman left.
What do you mean?
What? The day?
No. Oh, she left the job.
She's leaving?
Barstool? Yeah, she tweeted. This week was my last
week with Barstool.
Oh, goddamn.
Damn.
Damn.
Shame. Shout out with barstool oh god damn damn oh damn shame shout out to beeman yeah she got 10x on there yeah oh yeah fucking oh gee huh spawn sad awuga awuga god damn it don't
but do i kind of do she would appreciate it well boys in chat activate
your side out your girl in the replies writer God damn it. Forget it. That'd be a good send-off.
Ratio.
The new ratio is there has to be more Awuga replies than likes on the tweet.
Okay, that's the new ratio.
Hard to do.
This is going to be sad Awugas.
I'm not saying you have to do this.
Pretty much done now.
No, you've really covered your,
yeah, you're good, you're good.
I'm trying to see where my moral compass is.
I think that's fine.
I think that's fine.
Yeah.
You 10x'd in there.
Yeah, she 10x'd.
Everybody can 10x to her.
He was asking for it.
Every time you do that voice,
I love it so much.
The first one.
Oh, she's got 22 in there.
Damn.
That was a fucking bummer.
Why do you hook her twice?
It's the nature of it.
Yeah.
Oh, maybe we'll have her back for the 12-hour episode.
We've got to figure that out.
Yeah.
We're going to have a who's who, people coming through.
O'Day.
O'Day.
O'Day will come.
Yes, O'Day will absolutely be here.
He was singing last night.
Yeah, we're going to do a big planned out thing for the 12-hour episode.
So it might take a little time, but I think we should definitely do a KB's.
Maybe that's what it is.
When we get the next KB's
while we figure out
who's doing it
that'll be part of it
it'll be a part of the
12 hour stream
yeah
up all the wheels
in the 12 hour stream
look at that
it's Attawooga's
Attawooga's
what a bummer
Randall
yeah
say something
we gotta do the rundown
we gotta do the rundown
alright luck boys
we'll get on the show people blame me fuck there was one guy who left a funny comment
last night it was like of course big cat cut it short at two hours and 45 minutes
no matter what happens i'm always the one to blame for the short episodes.
I don't know why I've gotten that marking, but I will take it.
Two hours and 45 minutes.
I was drunk.
Now, I was too.
Do people actually watch them all the way through?
I think that one is worth it.
That's like a director's cut movie every night.
There was one time we were all just sitting on the floor playing Mario Kart.
That couldn't have been entertaining.
It wasn't, no. But it was fun for us. It was very fun. I was I got I got home. I was still drunk Uh-huh mezcal the new drink of choice, but yeah do liquor and drugs more often. Yeah, dude. Yeah, why not?
Mellow you out. You're cool Brandon. Yes, you were sick
Ever yeah
This Brandon right now, we don't like this brain like cool Brandon We were sick as fuck, dude. Yeah, you were cool. Coolest dude ever. Yeah. That's kind of a joke.
This Brandon right now, we don't like this Brandon.
We like cool Brandon.
You're the only one that's not doing substances all the time.
Of course you're the most uncool one.
Okay, that makes sense.
Yeah, I don't do substances.
I enjoyed that one, though.
I take mushrooms every morning.
Do you?
No.
Yeah.
The lion's mane?
Yeah.
I was thinking about doing that.
Just try.
I heard it's better than coffee.
It gets you going.
I think it takes a while to get going.
What Jake Palmer was telling us, it takes a couple months to start feeling the true effects.
I'm on, what, one week, so I'm not going to declare yet, but I'll let you guys know.
Do you just eat them, or do you put them in tea or something?
It's a little tincture bottle.
Okay. Before I brush my teeth tincture bottle. Okay.
Before I brush my teeth.
It tastes terrible.
Sure.
This is just like kratom.
I don't know.
It's a tincture of the liquid that tastes terrible.
Yeah.
Two of them.
I do this cordyceps as well.
The place that houses the Brandon Walker Smoking Lounge has a huge display of kratom.
It's on every block. I didn't know that. I didn't know there was kratom. There's a kratom wheelounge has a huge display of Kratom. On every block.
I didn't know that.
I didn't know there was Kratom.
There's a Kratom wheel.
I started to buy you some Kratom.
People treat me like I'm some anomaly for doing it.
Yeah, I didn't know what Kratom was.
Everyone's doing it.
I've only heard it from you.
Yeah, I didn't know.
You were an early adopter.
Maybe for the 12-hour wheel, we should have one person do mushrooms.
We should do what?
12-hour wheel, one person does mushrooms.
I've been wanting to get back into that.
I could do that if you guys are going to block out.
It's nice of you for falling on the sword for us.
My hero.
Mystery mushroom?
Yeah.
Or we can do for the 12-hour yak, each of us take a different drug.
Oh, I like that.
It's going to get hairy when we're on yeah numbers like
six two yeah we'll do a drug draft whippets in the corner we could do a draft in a 12-hour stream
yes oh yeah never mind yeah i also think that we should do four to four. I like that. I think the number every God.
I know.
I think the earlier it starts,
the funnier it is.
Oh,
Oh,
Oh,
4 a.m.
Yeah.
I think we should start at like,
yeah,
I think people love you guys are like,
I know people would set their alarms and wake us to join.
If you joined at like a ridiculous hour,
I don't know if it's possible from a tech perspective with other shows to do,
like we can't do
Pick Central
while the,
I don't know if we could do
Pick Central
Can we just dog those guys
for the day?
We'll just not do that show.
Can Pick Central just be
in one of the other
podcast rooms?
Yeah,
like,
yeah.
Yeah,
I guess we can figure it out,
yeah.
I don't know.
We're going to have a lot
of planning,
but we'll do it.
Yeah,
it would have to be a Friday
in that case,
I think.
Starting that early
would be awesome too
because I would like a stoolie to planning, but we'll do it. Yeah, it would have to be a Friday in that case, I think. Starting that early would be awesome, too,
because I would like a stoolie to zoom in and we watch him sleep.
That would be awesome if we just... Well, it could just be sass.
Yeah, he won't make it.
Yeah, yeah.
Wow.
Yeah, we should do it and not tell sass it's starting
and you just leave your computer open in his room.
Yes.
I would love to see him wake up and be panicked.
Yeah, I'd be like, panicked. That'd be hilarious.
If he's just motherfucking asleep.
We do five to five and tell Sass it's nine.
He's just the first four hours.
Yeah.
And watch his morning routine.
Yeah.
What if he beats off?
That would be awesome.
Have you heard his morning routine?
He settled on boy dad.
He wakes up and rolls around to get all the farts out.
And then he stands up and shakes his AC as hard as he can to make sure it can't fall out.
Oh, my God.
And that's it.
Paranoid about that.
Yeah.
How's your mice situation, by the way?
Do you guys find any in the traps?
No.
They're gone. But we haven't seen them. That's good. Okay. So you're living home No. They're gone.
But we haven't seen them.
That's good.
Okay, so you're living home again.
Yeah.
Okay.
It's hard falling asleep,
but once you get down,
it's all right.
Yeah.
You learn to live with it.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
See you, everyone.
Bye, guys.
See you tomorrow.
Or buy R&R.com.
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Sass will be there.
Sass will be there. Big Cat will be there. See you tomorrow. Or buy R&R.com. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Sass will be there. Sass will be there.
Big Cat will be there.
Two people fighting.
I think Alex is going.
Alex is going, I think. It's the act That's time to talk shop
We're doing Yankees love
It's the act
It's the act
It's the act