The Yak - Jersey Jerry is Taking His Talents to the PGA | The Yak 7-28-23
Episode Date: July 28, 20233:27 PMYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, hold that up.
Presented by Roback.
We're going to answer this cast in just a moment.
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20 off all polos hoodies shorts and more code yak so we got different cast and crew today uh i didn't really know what i was expecting this
morning i thought we were gonna do just a booth show maybe sass i see stanko giving me the stank
eye from uh the way corner uh i thought we're gonna do just a booth show maybe and maybe sass would be here so roan is moving um the rest nick and kb it is monkey boy night in nashua nashua
i don't even know what state that's in new hampshire new hampshire okay so they're there
with clemmer tonight for monkey boy day brandon is uh i know he's in chicago but he was had an obligation today and big cat also had something
today uh so we did it here and uh we've got gia to my left uh returning favorite we've got the
wanton don over here how are you parts unknown and then uh the six god himself michael greer everyone's favorite canadian the vibes guy on out of order
which is awesome i watch it every every i don't say every week because it's what every three
weeks every month uh every month yeah once a month how'd you get involved in that owen just
asked he was he was like i think you'd be good for contributing ideas and stuff. And I really got nothing else to contribute.
I can't do camera.
I can't edit.
I can't do anything.
So that's why they gave me vibes.
I feel kind of dirty every time I see I'm even credited on it.
Do you contribute ideas or do you only contribute vibes?
I try to contribute ideas.
Yeah, I do.
But those mostly come from the more talented people on the crew than myself.
Do you grab people coffees?
No, I don't.
I don't.
I should, though.
I tried vlogging for a little bit, and that didn't work out at all.
On the shoot for the Welcome to Moe's sketch, I brought a camera,
and everything vlog-worthy, I just didn't have the camera out, ever.
Feidelberg would turn and be like, did you get that for the vlog and i'd be like no i didn't i missed everything so yeah uh there's no vlog incoming at least not not uh manned by me okay well that is a
very fun production so it's you owen mikey paths kind of behind the scenes. Is that right? Is there anyone else? Glenn Miller?
Tyler Miller, Nick Hamilton, Jake Bass.
There's a guy named Chris Arnold who does the sound who doesn't work here.
But I don't know how Owen found him, but good guy.
And a few others I'm sure I'm forgetting right now.
That's nice.
Very nice. And Donnie, what is your plan?
I feel like no one ever
knows where you're a nomad but you're moving to chicago nomad but i have been based in new york
for the last year yes um but yeah the end of august i will be moving out to chicago i gotta
get married first in like two two weeks or something and then afterwards uh ireland yeah oh my gosh then afterwards yeah
heading straight to chicago who won the uh bracket whatever thing we were calling it this year
i don't so i've heard some things about that um because you invited those winners to your wedding
because with it they got a trip i did say that before i saw the
team she won then kind of retracted that but i was trying to work out a deal because the winners
of that got a free trip to ireland whenever they wanted i talked to nadu and he was like i'm not
i'm not really trying to go to ireland and i was like well how about i just like pay you a little
and then you let me take your spot?
Because, like, you get a free trip for you and a plus one.
I was like, oh, I would take that.
But then I heard that the teams had to travel all together and, like, all at the same time.
But speaking of which, the people who won.
Was there more than two teams?
Yeah, I think two teams won.
Jeff Nadeau no longer works at the company.
Chris Castellani won.
He's sober, so I don't think it makes sense for him to go to a whiskey distillery.
Casey won, but she has a young kid, so I don't know if she can go.
Content Kim won.
I don't know if she's going.
Riggs won, and I know Riggs really wants to go to Ireland.
Okay.
But, yeah, I don't know if I can talk.
But they may have reached out to PFT, and they're like,
can you sub in for some of these people who can't go?
Gotcha.
I would have assumed all those people were already in your wedding party,
to be honest.
Yeah, that is a ragtag group of people
yeah it was like hands down the most random teams
oh also Katie Statz won
oh yeah is she going?
who knows
I don't know but speaking of going
there is a
guy who's going on the Corn Furry
tour today as a caddy
Jersey Jerry did you guys see this
yeah i didn't understand it like does like respectfully to the golfer and to jerry but
like does that guy just suck and he has no chance at going to the pga tour that's the only reason i
could or he's already very secured going because i don't get this like caddy's an important thing
that's a sick picture.
Maybe you guys can correct me.
Wait, can someone explain to me the significance of Korn Ferry?
The minor league for the PGA.
Okay, so if you win, you get to go to the PGA.
I think top 30 in their season, and it's coming down to the end,
from what I understand.
So that's why I'm surprised that a guy's – I haven't looked up where he is in the standing so maybe that would tell the story but he went uh minus one through nine and then jerry retired i don't know that's
pretty good good or bad jerry retired or was i think he was relieved of his duties after nine
holes okay because he was not good or because he didn't want to do it? He has one under.
That's pretty good, right?
I didn't get fired.
So the caddy felt better
and wanted to...
Oh, okay.
Oh, okay.
That makes more sense.
So what's the most
important thing
a caddy does?
Is it the reeds
on the greens?
Like, telling you like,
oh, it's going to
roll this way?
Or is it because...
I think they're supposed
to be familiar
with the course,
but also obviously carrying the bags and stuff like that.'t they tell you well you don't have to be
that skilled to carry a bag but i guess and then you also like i guess the caddy is like oh i think
you should use this club but i'm sure like all of the golfers and corn fairies like know what club
they want to use i mean every course is different the only knowledge i really have is daniel
rapaport tweeted out before because i think he's playing in this was that his caddy like made
uh like a notebook of every hole and like kind of like he drew out what the hole looked like and
like where you want to hit the ball ideally so that that can certainly be an advantage if you
have that caddying is like the best job to have when you're younger. Like I feel like all my guy friends would caddy
and they would make like thousands of dollars.
Yeah.
So in China, all of the caddies are 40-year-old women.
Oh.
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
They're all like women in their 40s.
Is there a specific?
I don't know how I feel about that.
There's not like a single male caddy in China.
That's so interesting.
By choice? I doubt it. there's not like a single male caddy in China. That's so interesting.
By choice?
I doubt it.
It's just like, yeah,
that's if you're a 40-year-old woman looking for a job.
Do they tip the same way in China as they do in America?
I didn't play a lot of golf in China,
but for food, you don't tip. Okay.
Yeah, I don't think I left a single tip
the entire like eight years I was there.
Right, yeah.
And then one time I accidentally left the equivalent of 50 cents on my table,
and I was walking out, and I was maybe two blocks away,
and someone chased me down out of the restaurant and was like,
you left this.
Wow.
Yeah, so they really don't fuck with tips.
That's interesting.
40-year-olds winning.
That is cool.
When we were out at the Comb with pmt we went to a
driving range and we met some people that big cat knew and one of these guys they were like um i
guess like a little bit older than us and in finance he was saying that his uh brother-in-law
he got married like very young like out of college and his sister was a little bit older so she was married and he was a
amateur golfer and his caddy similar to i guess jerry's cat or this guy got sick so he was like
hey would you mind caddying for me this weekend you don't have to do anything i know the course
just kind of hold the bag and you know whatever so he was like sure yeah no problem this guy won
the tournament so what you don't realize is
when the guy wins a tournament he's winning you know a ton of money the caddy gets a cut of that
so yeah i got like 65 grand as like a 22 year old that's sick basically cash awesome yeah so
it seems like a pretty sweet gig i was hoping jerry was gonna last but i guess this guy
saw the action his dude was getting in and was like,
you better hurry back into the office.
Speaking of the office, Nicky Smokes, first week.
I went in hot.
A very polarizing character already.
Yeah, I saw on Twitter, Nate was like,
can someone blog about something that's not Barbie or Nick Smokes?
And I was confused about who Nick Smokes was.
TJ kind of gave me the rundown about him.
And I just, I don't know how I feel about him, to be honest.
I mean, he certainly got a great opportunity.
Yeah.
And he took advantage of it.
But how are you, I mean, he's super divisive.
I saw Kareem's blog.
He's in the Chicago office now, right?
So he got a one-year deal.
I don't know when that started, but he just started appearing.
I heard that he was going to move to Chicago.
I didn't know that that was official.
I think his first day was Monday.
I don't know if that was like officially or first day in the Chicago office.
I don't know the backstory there.
But I think this is his first week or at least his first week really on the map.
He's certainly been making an impression.
It was his birthday yesterday, too.
I don't know if you saw that.
And Jerry took him out for his birthday, which was a very nice thing.
But, Donnie, you've been here for a while.
What do you think of a new guy coming in this hot?
Yeah, so I don't really know the guy at all.
I haven't seen any content he's been in.
But I think just people are sort of upset that he just got like a 100K contract
solely based off a bet.
But I guess you can't really blame him for that.
Like Dave made the bet.
But, yeah, I mean, I'm sure there are some people here not getting paid 100K
and they're like, what the fuck?
Right.
Controversial.
Yeah, but I think controversy can help you at this company so you know yeah he might be able to ride the controversy for a while and make a name
for himself we'll see group you've been here for more than a while actually i remember interviewing
you yeah yeah you did i always thought you were a producer i did yeah i did uh agricultural futures
before coming here yeah i remember you explained it to me a very very long time ago in one of those
like side rooms when i like interviewed you very like unofficially yeah yeah i basically had the
job and it was just like meeting people we mostly talked about like where i should live okay yeah
that's when i felt it was like a done deal where we were
talking about where I should move to so um but yeah I don't I don't know I'm not really in content
I'm not gonna like shit talk anyone um I'm not a I the only thing I'd say is like the crying on
camera thing I was like like you're not you're not crying over Jalen Ramsey enough of that
did he actually cry i think
i didn't see that it was kind of cringeworthy but other than that i don't really care about like
like speaking of something what's he supposed to do not accept the contract right right speaking
of someone who kind of used controversy to ride the way to the top nobody knew who you were until
someone posted a photo of you passed out on the streets of Nantucket. Dave was like, this is our data guy.
And then you kind of just like used that.
And like now, you know.
I wouldn't say I used that.
I tried to ignore that for the most part.
Did Dave tweet it?
Yeah, Dave retweeted that and was like, this is our data guy,
which is the awesome thing about working at Barstool Sports
because if that happens at any other company you're fired immediately yeah and i i did not feel great about that when it went out
i was heading back back from nantucket and like i was like oh fuck like i'm fucked when i go in
tomorrow and everyone was just laughing about it so that uh fortunately turned out all right for me. Stu would use it in presentations.
Your manager?
Yeah, for a year or two afterwards.
He'd be like, this data is brought to you by this guy before starting it.
So yeah, it worked out all right.
In terms of Nicky Smokes, we'll see how it goes.
He's fucking five days in.
He's getting so much shit it's crazy
yeah i know i feel like he has like more people that don't like him than people that do like him
which is hard to i think that's okay like if you don't have haters you don't have fans he's he's
got a lot of people you know if you're look if you're reading his blog and getting pissed about
it you're reading his blog oh totally and i feel like at barstool, you want the hate clicks just as much as you want
the clicks from people that you like.
It's all
good press for you.
Subscribe to the Any Publicity is Good Publicity
show. In my mind, what he's
doing...
Maybe though, seeing as
Jay...
Any Publicity is Good Publicity
except publicity. Yeah. Jesus Christ, Jay. Any publicity is good publicity Except publicity
But seeing as Dave made the bet
And Dave's based in Miami now
Nicky Smokes was based in Miami
I feel like Dave should have just made him like
Number one employee at Barstool Miami
Instead of then just like
Pawning him off to Big Cat and being like
He's your guy now
It's kind of funny when you think about it because weren't you in the running to be like
uh miami did you make a presentation was that fake no that was uh like i guess they did that
for the dave portnoy show as like a joke they were like oh who'd be interested in living in miami and
i was like yeah being like oh yes like why not and then and then i think kareem texted me or something he's
like he's like um you're gonna go on the dave portnoy show tomorrow make sure to dress up and
i'm like i'm not that fucking dumb kareem i'm not gonna come in like a suit tomorrow but yeah they
were just like doing potential barstool miami things but it was all just basically a joke but
yeah that was but there was always kind of a serious faction where Dave talked about getting a crew down there, which would include Clemmer.
Yeah, Clemmer.
Maybe Nadeau.
And then I think you were in that, no?
I don't know.
Not when he was talking about it in that context.
It was like the very early on, like the Portnoy show thing.
Yeah, I feel like with the new guy, he could have just started that.
But yeah.
Yeah, definitely.
We'll see what is going on in Chicago.
Booth guys.
We are, who's, or Connor.
So Connor Griffin, who's been on the show several times, runs Yak Stats and Info.
You're moving tomorrow?
Monday.
Monday.
Monday.
Today's my last day in the office, but then I move all my stuff.
Yeah, Monday, which is pretty crazy.
I had planned a little behind the scenes, so I'm glad that you're here.
Give some people, some yak people at home, an idea of what you do, because you've been
a huge help since you joined the show.
Thank you.
I'm pumped that you're moving to Chicago, but give the people an idea of what you do.
Yeah, I run the socials.
Well, Twitter, we have a bunch of people helping out with the Twitter.
But Instagram, TikTok, all we post on YouTube, Facebook.
I don't know how many people are on Facebook in our audience.
But if you are, go follow us on Facebook.
Follow us on all of our socials, as always.
But I'm posting on there.
We have a great team'm posting on there.
We have a great team of people on graphics.
DJ, Daniel Johnson, one of them.
Obviously, Garrett, Quigs, Will Sparks, a bunch of people who help out, and they'll contribute.
But I'll post all that.
I cut all the clips.
You do Yak History, right? Yak History, which has taken a little bit of a backseat.
I want to make that page a lot better.
But there's just been a lot going on, especially now with the show going like two hours a day, every day.
There's a lot to edit.
There's a lot to take in.
But yeah, that's for the most part what I do.
Do you edit the clips?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So yeah, when KB was like, who's adding these clips of me with my hands on my pants?
Like, that was me.
And, yes, I was fully aware that his hand was, yeah, right there.
And I was like, yeah, I'm not cutting this out.
Like, this is funny.
But, yeah, no.
So I do that, all that type of stuff.
In your defense, he's wearing the shortest shorts possible.
Yeah.
And he was literally grabbing his penis for half of that dialogue.
So that's one thing that I'm hoping to do this weekend.
I don't know if I'll get around to it
because I have to finish packing and everything.
No.
I think...
Giving it a tug.
I remember certain times
where he was doing that in other clips,
and I want to put together a couple compilation,
but I don't know if I'll get the time.
What?
Touching penis compilation.
Maybe.
He's already got that in his personal files.
Now he's got it in the world. He it does maybe he just really had to pee like there are times when i'm walking the streets
of new york and really have to piss and the only thing i can do to prevent myself from
peeing my pants is just grab my dick and i feel so awkward for like a few blocks and i'm like
everyone just probably thinks i'm a pervert like it looks like i'm just like that's the only myself
an over-the-pants hand job when i really have to pee sometimes yeah i do just have to grab my dick
i've never heard that yeah that's it helps but it does not look good i'll try i'll try it out yeah
you guys have all been new york residents for the most part for a while what's the wildest thing
you've seen on the street of new york i remember one time I was walking down the street and I saw a guy, it was 57th street and, um, long block between ninth and
10th. And it was just me and him. He was at least 70 yards away from me, but I saw him open up his
fly and just start pissing and walking towards me across the street and he looked like
a normal functioning adult it was like one o'clock in the afternoon on a weekday so it was an odd
time but that was one of the weirder things that i had seen when i was walking to work from my old
apartment uh which was across the street from the port authority bus terminal so wasn't the best spot um it was like 10 in the morning and i think it was like the corner of
8th and like 34th like a busy corner like uh by penn station like msg there and you know those
like little bodegas that are outside like on the sidewalk we have one right
outside the office yeah there was a guy there threatening stands threatening the dude uh inside
with a knife and then the guy came out to confront him and he just had an umbrella and he was like
fighting him off and i was i was turning down that way and then i'm like fuck no not that way
and i went across the street and there was a police officer across the street and i was like
yo there's some guy over there like trying to stab a guy.
And he could not have given less of a fuck.
I feel like he must run that corner.
And that's something that he sees pretty regularly.
Like that guy just fights off the dude with an umbrella.
And he did.
The guy won with the umbrella.
Fuck yeah.
An umbrella would be great to have because you can just like if he starts like swinging it, you can open it up.
That's a good point, too.
He did.
He didn't pull that move.
It just gave him distance.
And the guy eventually just gave up.
Also didn't take you as a snitch.
I fucking saw a guy trying to try to stab him.
I'm not.
What is that?
My boy on the corner.
I'm trying to stab the guy like, oh, yeah, I got to protect that.
Then the only other thing is I saw a couple guys just tying off and shooting up in the middle of the day.
Of course, by my old apartment.
So that would be the two things.
I saw a woman up against a door.
She was squatting, and I was walking by, and a poop fell out of her butt.
And I really turned my head so quick and I was like, I don't think I saw that.
I don't think I saw what I saw, but I saw what I saw.
So that was probably the grossest thing I've ever seen.
Just a woman taking a dump.
It was at like 2 a.m.
I would say I was walking home from a bar.
I thought it was hallucinating, but unfortunately it was very real.
A crazy thing.
I was in Chicago last weekend and I've like New York subways are known for
being crazy.
Like I've seen people jacking off on those,
but one thing I've never seen on New York subways is just people smoking
blunts and cigarettes in the subway car.
And they do that in Chicago.
I was riding the subway in Chicago.
There were two blunts in rotation on the subway. and then one guy just smoking a cigarette and the fucking place was
hazy as fuck i could i could barely see yeah then you get like secondhand high you're like god damn
it no yeah you know i i had to wait for the subway to stop and change cars because i was getting
extremely lightheaded um was this like a very late time of night?
No, this was the middle of the afternoon.
Really?
It's like if you're on your way to a job interview or something.
I was on my way to the barstool office, so it didn't matter.
But if you were on there for more than five minutes, you were going to leave the subway reeking of weed and cigarettes.
Not in an ideal way.
In the beginning of the day it's that's a wild move so like late at night
like that's not yeah that most outrageous thing ever but i feel like they probably weren't on
their way to to work the closest thing i saw to that is i just saw something like rolling a joint
on the subway like a full-ass rolling tray like he had everything yeah boy that's i mean weed's
legal in new york now Yeah. In the city?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, I feel like I see people all the time.
There's like new, there's new weed stores on the street every day.
And they all have like the most absurd names and they all are like super nice.
Like I'm like, where?
I can never tell if they're legal or not.
I know, me too.
They kind of existed before.
Sometimes there'll be the big signs that say like this location has been seized for illegal activity but it'll be but it'll still be open there'll just be a huge sign
yeah it makes no sense it's like and they all have like the most absurd names like zaza like
like light up signs i was a thing in toronto for a while too like uh weed wasn't legal yet but there
were weed stores everywhere and like every couple months you'd hear
about all these seas and they would literally put these massive fucking cinder blocks in front of
the door to prevent people from going in like this wide this tall and then like a couple days later
they'd be gone and they'd just be operating again and nobody would do anything about it until they
decided to do something about it and the cycle would just continue i don't understand how how that happens but there's actually a 60 minute story on weed
stores and like also i guess technically not weed but like um you know the delta eight type stuff
and all that uh there's a very high barrier to entry like it's very expensive to open one of
those stores and the profit margin is like not that great i know which is like you have to be
like established for a while and you can make good money doing it yeah you have to build up a client
base and like be there for a long time it's just very difficult to start so i feel like in new york
it must be so hard to make a profit because there's so many of them right which makes no sense
if they're so expensive i just don't understand how there's a one on every single street corner
now they got like food truck essentially.
Yeah.
Those food truck ones are like,
like fake,
you know,
like those,
they're like,
yeah,
I used to like buy them when I was like younger,
like when I would go to the city and like pretend that we got high from them.
But like,
you don't really feel anything,
but like the,
I feel like the weed stores in like Martha's vineyard and stuff,
like they probably make so much money.
I just don't know like how these stores in New York make money when there's just so many.
Right.
I also don't know how they can sell shroom bars.
I don't think they can.
I don't think they just do.
Yeah.
They just do?
Okay.
And then those shroom bars, I don't know if they're always shrooms because I've tried them.
Oh my God.
One time I had a great time.
The other time I was like, I do not feel like I'm on shrooms right now.
But I was definitely on something.
Even the weed that I get, like there was a time when bodegas, I mean, they still do, but bodegas sell weed.
And I think I bought like a pre-roll from a bodega and there had to be – there was something in there.
I don't know if it was crack or what, but I felt like I was outside of my body.
I was looking at myself from outside and I could see myself moving.
It was the craziest experience.
Probably kitty litter.
They all have bodega cats.
Do you know why they have that?
Why?
To keep the mice out.
Right.
That makes sense did you
guys see yesterday uh or maybe the day before the government releasing the ufos yeah the info that
the ufos essentially are real and they have like martian bodies and ships yeah they said they have
non-human biologics right which you know who knows what that is that could be a cat
could be a cat but if it was found like in the ufo then you assume like all right it was from
the pilot which i don't know if like a cat's gonna be piloting a ufo it could be like an
interdimensional being it could be like humans from the future i don, no, it's not human. Some sort of AI creature that future humans built,
and then they figured out time travel.
Like a rival?
They're sending these biologic robots back in time.
Yeah, I didn't look into that.
What was it?
It was some congressional shit?
They had a hearing?
It looks pretty official. I'm not a news guy by any means. It was very it? It was like some congressional shit. Like they had a hearing. It looks pretty official.
Yeah.
Not a news guy by any means.
It was like a whistleblower.
Like, yeah.
But I feel like at this point, it's like we've been hearing it for so long that aliens are real that it's kind of just like, okay.
And what are like, it's just like average news.
I feel like at this point.
It was the same guy from a couple weeks ago that like said these things.
It was just he was
under oath this time okay which i guess what i said was like there's no way to prove that he's
lying like you unless they searched the entire universe and didn't find anything so like he
could just say it and how could they prove he's lying so do they have the physical oh well no
well he said they did but how could they prove he's wrong but he doesn't
have that right yeah so who who who is he saying has them these secret government organizations
so there's no way to for them to prove that he's lying okay yeah so what government which like our
government our government okay they passed a new whistleblower law that if you if you want to
reveal top secret information and you go directly
to congress you can't be jailed for it so that's what he did like he went to congress and he was
like the u.s government has a ufo retrieval program and they actually have some of these
like ufos in their possession and some non-human biologics interesting um yeah i mean just hopefully
before we all die we we get definitive proof.
Do we have a background check on this guy?
Do we know what his deal is, what his history is?
He did have a pretty important job.
They did a background check.
He was who he said he was.
Okay, interesting.
You guys create that stuff?
Leave in what?
UFOs and explosions? Oh, yeah, interesting. You guys create that stuff? Leave in what?
UFOs and explosions. Oh, yeah, totally.
It's like we have more universes than we have grades of sand.
There has to be life on another planet in a universe somewhere.
Right.
There's just no way that there's not.
Maybe not in our universe.
I'm team alien.
Yeah, I figure probably I don't care that much, though.
Until they decide to get involved in my life. Right, until they come. Yeah. I don't care that much, though. Until they decide to get involved in my life.
Right, until they come.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I think they're aliens, like, here, among us.
I feel like it just makes too much sense.
Maybe humans were created by aliens.
And we're all part alien.
But then is that an alien?
By definition, I don't think so right it's tough
to think about i don't know i fuck with aliens i saw ufo in november za has seen aliens oh yeah
yeah bro it's all bullshit it's all fake man what are you talking about you saw him it's all fake
man it's all fake what does this switch up about? Aliens, all fake, man.
I don't need people fucking telling me.
The government got to him.
No, I'm kidding.
Oh, true.
I don't need people telling me.
Jack Mack got to him.
No, it's just more annoying.
It's like I don't go around telling the story.
It's like when people ask me, I'm like, all right, it's happened.
Oh, no, you're lying.
You're lying.
Okay.
I definitely believe you.
I believe you, too.
Thank you.
Because you not only saw the spaceship, you actually saw the alien, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, we were.
Of course, I was young.
So I'll be very upfront.
I don't remember it.
It's just I've told the story.
I've been telling the story for the past 30-something years of my life over and over again.
So it's more you memorize the story than the actual event.
But, yeah, we were told to draw what we saw.
60-something students drew the same thing.
Yeah, they have a full documentary
on this. I think it's called The Phenomena.
And then, yeah, it's all about
Zah's school. Wait, that's what it is?
Yeah, no, this is like
what happened at his school is one of the most well-known
UFO stories out there.
Wait, so did you see it landing?
Yeah. Wow.
It was during recess, and our teachers, a break time, recess, you call it here,
our teachers have like, they usually, because that's the only time that kids,
that you're not in class, and that's the one time that they can have their big staff meeting.
So we only had like two or so members of staff supervising us,
so there weren't that many adult eyes then.
But one of the ones that was supervising
caught a glimpse of it as it was leaving.
That led to Harvard professors
and professors from, like, Oxford showing up
and doing weird-ass fucking experiments.
Wow.
Wow, that's so interesting.
That's crazy.
If an alien landed and just, like,
walked into this office, you like cooperate and like
and ask you like go back on the ship would you do it no i would ask like what like what's gonna
happen to me you know what i mean like can i come back home i feel like the first person to make
contact with the alien is essentially representing the entire human race. I wouldn't want that job.
I don't think
I'd do a good representation.
I think I would take it.
You would do a great representation
of the human race, I think.
Because you know so many.
Yes.
If you can live in China, you can live in
an alien spaceship.
What do you think if we got definitive proof of aliens,
what would that do to the super religious people out there?
You think that would really...
I feel like they would refuse to believe it even if...
Yeah.
You know what I mean?
Are aliens not, like, does that not comply with religion?
I don't think it's, like, occupied.
Because I feel like God made man.
They never said God made aliens.
Fair point.
Okay.
Yeah, I don't know.
Well, a lot of people think all of the angels like in the Bible are actually just references to aliens and things like that.
Interesting.
Didn't know that.
You haven't watched enough Ancient Aliens.
No, I haven't.
Speaking of Ancient Aliens,
I'm sure you'll notice I'm not wearing my shades.
I've been trying to phase them out around the office.
But if you ever wanted to see me not wearing shades before today,
you could watch Ancient Aliens.
Because me and Vibs went to the Area 51 raid
that was supposed to happen like four years ago and i
was standing at the gate of area 51 at like four in the morning and then there was a bunch of people
being like oh we're gonna raid and there was a film crew there filming for ancient aliens and
they asked to like film an interview with me and said i couldn't wear the shades and then like
two months later i popped up on the show just fully doxxed my full name, my hometown, not wearing shades.
And I was like on multiple substances at the time.
I came across as fairly sober in the clip.
You went to Area 51.
What was your intention?
Well, that was when they had organized a huge festival outside of uh of area 51
what prompted it i forget wasn't there some it's like a facebook group yeah it was like what if
we all went to area 51 they can't stop all of us it was a mean so this was like january 6th for
aliens yeah okay you don't recall this at all? No. It didn't actually happen. Too much of a pussy.
Yeah.
Everyone was just there.
It was like the biggest group of weirdos I've ever seen.
They're all doing that.
I can't imagine.
Naruto run everywhere.
What's that?
That's when you put your hands behind you.
And then they're like, okay, we're all going to meet at the gate at like four in the morning.
And there was a huge group of people there.
And then all the guards were standing out front sort of just like laughing at all of us
i feel like and i don't want this to come off the wrong way but i feel like the people who go to
that are more like the nerdy type yes they were probably a little bit more scared of actually
going into a government facility you know what i mean yeah like all the guards all those jocks
that were at january 6th it's like those are more like like brutes i feel like yeah i mean like all
the guards were just sort of laughing and people out front were having fun and like singing songs
but they were like if you do cross this line we will shoot you oh wow yeah well i mean yeah that
ended things pretty quickly?
Yeah, people were doing, like, fake runs towards the gate.
And then, like, at one point, there was a group of 30 people running towards the gate,
and then they all just, like, stopped at the gate.
They were like, all right.
What were they expecting?
To be, like, let in?
I don't know.
I mean, I think they were just, like, hoping to film a YouTube video or, like, film some
TikToks at the gate and call it a day.
Area 51's not a
building, right? It's like an actual
territory.
Yes. Apparently, I heard it's like the size
of Rhode Island or something.
It's like huge.
Arizona, New Mexico?
Nevada.
Nevada.
It's like an hour and a half from Las Vegas. Arizona, New Mexico? Nevada. Nevada. Can you see it on Google Maps?
It's like an hour and a half from Las Vegas.
Wait, was that on the screen?
But yeah, I think it's the size.
So even if you snuck into Area 51, you're not going to find much.
You're probably going to die of thirst before you find anything.
Is there stuff like, well, you probably don't know.
Is there like an underground building?
But you would have no idea if there was, right?
No, I have no idea.
But that's what people think.
Right.
Okay.
And they say the government says it's just an area where they test like new sorts of
aircraft.
Okay.
But it sounds like the perfect cover for. Yeah.
No.
Objectively.
Yeah.
You know, I'm team alien.
What is this?
Okay.
Oh, is that that's like what comes up for Google.
And that's it.
Like this little like.
Can you do like satellite mode?
You just walk right under that.
I don't think so.
That thing.
Yeah. But you get shot in the head.
There's a pretty big fence.
Yeah, I was going to say, that's definitely not the gate you approached, right?
I think that is.
Oh, fuck.
Oh, no, that's like a gift shop outside of Area 51.
Yeah, I assume so.
Yeah, I've seen that before.
Yeah, no, but I think that is the gate where we were.
Right.
Okay, so that's where they test the aircraft i'm assuming
so that's the that's the decoy i think you got to go underground like in the movie independence day
great movie yeah yeah and there's like a town nearby that's just all alien themed
that would be so fun to go to i mean i i i had a good time did you see um the new west
anderson movie asteroid city it's kind of like the vibe of area 51 i feel like are there is like
are there any aliens yeah yeah an alien comes down it's very funny it's not one of his best
movies but i i recommend it it's good i to, and this is a long time ago.
I haven't done this in at least a decade.
I used to have an Independence Day impression in my bag.
You guys want to hear it?
Of Will Smith?
No, of the alien.
Speaking through the doctor.
Oh, when he's using his vocal cords?
Oh, yeah.
I would love to hear that.
I haven't done this in a really long time what do you want
what do you want from us
that's pretty good yeah i can't recall that scene so D1 from us. Die! And they shoot him up.
That's pretty good.
Yeah.
I can't recall that scene.
Oh, that's like the big reveal of the alien.
The only scene I remember from that movie is when he's carrying his...
Fuck, I'm forgetting the name.
When he falls out of the sky and he has a parachute. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he's walking through the desert.
It's like the only scene I remember from Independence Day.
I don't know why.
It's got to be one of my favorite movies.
One of the original summer blockbusters.
I think it came out on July 4th.
Yeah, it came out on July 4th.
I think I saw it on July 4th.
I think that was the first movie I ever saw twice in theaters.
Wow.
Big summer blockbuster.
Speaking of area Nevada, not really um road trips so a bunch of us are
going to drive to chicago pretty soon connor's going on monday uh what's the best road trip
you guys have ever been on college tour that we did in the fall we did three weeks on a tour bus
me brie grace and hannah oh the college tour yeah it was super fun where'd you go
we started at michigan state my alma mater and then we went to wisconsin and then old miss
um auburn georgia south carolina that's a long ass drive no from from wisconsin to old miss yeah it was very long we stopped in
st louis for the night um terrible city yes yeah the baseball stadium looks awesome
because there's like a big bar across the street went to the that's probably the coolest thing
in the city yeah yeah we went to the arch that's about it and then i believe we went to a ruth's chris in the hotel but that's what we did
in st louis and then yeah um it was so much fun very draining but so much fun three weeks was a
long yeah a long time we slept in hotels we didn't sleep on the tour bus which was nice but um yeah
we did a lot we spent a lot of time on the tour bus and you know with brian grace i thought that
we were going to like kind of be they were going to be like partying and it would of time on the tour bus. And, you know, with Bree and Grace, I thought that we were going to, like, kind of be – they were going to be, like, partying and it would be crazy on the tour bus and stuff.
But most of the time we just slept and did work.
Right.
But it was very fun.
Is traveling with Bree like traveling with a rock star when you actually arrive at the college campuses?
Yeah, I would – it's probably the craziest thing I've ever seen,
the way that these people react to when they see Brie and Grace.
Like, it is very, very cool.
And these kids just love her so much.
And, like, when they throw these parties, like, it's more dominantly girls.
And these girls just go crazy for them.
And it's so cool.
And it's wild to see.
My first time ever going on a tour with them was boulder and that was a bit
more chill because you know the west coast presence isn't as much there but then we went
to lsu to fred's and they were on stage like that like they were like beyonce former yeah and and
all of fred's was packed and it was crazy it was so crazy very cool yeah when i traveled around with nick and kb we didn't
really get that bus never got swarmed yeah unfortunately no the bus never got swarmed
but like you know someone would see the bus and then a girl the girls would come and drive up and
then another girl then we'd be like fuck we have to move the bus like behind like a like a building
like we can never park the bus at a hotel because like you know people would come and when we went to South Carolina Josh Richards came with
us and it was like nothing I've ever seen before because they were doing like a man on the street
on campus and we literally had to we didn't have security because we just went by ourselves
and we had to like grab them and run for our. And there was crowds of people chasing us.
When the Jonas Brothers released their album in Times Square, it was like that.
Wow.
It was crazy.
Yeah, she's enormous now.
And you're moving into the PMT studio to be careful?
Yeah.
Okay, that's awesome.
Yeah, we're very excited.
What about you guys? Road trips?
I've never really done one where you're stopping at multiple places or anything like that did you get to here you drove you flew flew yeah just truck truck took
all my shit and then i flew here have you ever done the drive uh no or when i was in high school
to come see a yankee game with my family okay the shittiest road trip i ever had was the multiple
times i drove back to canada after the nantucket weekend
with my friends like we'd have to leave at like 6 a.m and be on the road for like 14 hours to get
back that was awful so no that's not a good road trip but yeah i've never done like a true road
trip where you stop at a bunch of places and shit like that yeah honestly i don't think you do want
to die um yeah so me nick and kb for season two of Rediscovering America, we filmed the first three episodes
and just one like 12 day road trip, which we started in New York and then they, we,
we drove to Pittsburgh and then Pittsburgh to Cleveland.
Then we went to Put-In Bay and then from Put-In Bay, we drove to to buffalo rochester and then back to new york wow
um yeah i think the only time we got swarmed this was a separate trip in los angeles when we just
paid fake paparazzi all of us around on the hollywood strip um and then it kind of worked
because like once people saw like paparazzi like taking all these photos of us, then a bunch of other people gathered around too.
That's funny.
KB, who's that TikToker that KB used to have beef with?
Oh, Jacob Sartorius.
Jacob Sartorius, yes.
Yeah, yeah.
He was just like – I forget if you pull up the clip, but he was just like –
He was blocked
by Jacob Sartorius
and Jordan Woodruff
used to do this show
Blocked
and I produced it
and KB
explained the whole story
it's so funny
he would just like
tweet at him
like the most absurd shit
ever
he threatened to beat him up
yeah
and he's like 12 years old
he was like
he was like 15 at the time
I would say
or 16 around
and KB was
a lot of spunk
pretty sure KB could take him though
no doubt yeah on a road trip you're certainly gonna be drinking some high noons here at tequila
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What's your guys' favorite place to down a nice, cool high noon in this hot summer?
It's like 96 degrees today.
Beach.
On a boat.
Oh, nice pick.
Yeah.
You get seasick?
Not on, no.
I get seasick if you're on a boat and you can't like see land
or you can't like see the horizon okay or if it's like in the middle of the night but yeah if i if
if you've got like the sight of land to kind of ground you i'm good i have a bit of an irrational
fear of boats i don't like boating in the open sea scares me i don't know why i think
i'm scared of drowning and i think the submersible kind of scared me and now whenever i get on a boat
i'm like is that what the thing is called the submarine yeah the Titanic thing use its government
name i was like 2 000 feet underwater yeah i know i don't know i just i'm very scared of the ocean maybe
it's more scared of the ocean than i am of boats because i'm fine on a boat like when we're in like
um like an inlet or a lake you know but the ocean just scares me a lot yeah you're seeing like the
perfect storm with like a jillion foot waves and stuff like that that stuff is terrifying yeah like
a tsunami like i just i sharks i'm a shark's my favorite animal but
they're also what i'm scared of the most that doesn't make any sense yeah i think sharks are
super cool but they i'm very scared of getting bit by a shark i'm scared of whales huh i used
to actually swim with whale sharks like all the time you used to yeah okay i swam with them once in the
philippines it was like coolest thing i've ever done yeah when um so till around like 2015 2016
my parents owned a condo in la paz in baja california so that strip of land underneath California. And the sea of Cortez is like one of the most diverse seas of sea life.
And they have whale sharks and they're literally like 150 yards out from where
my parents' condo was.
So they have boats and stuff and you can take boats out and they're very,
very protected.
But yeah,
you just jump right in with a snorkel and they're right there and it's
freaking crazy.
And they,
but they just sit sideways or on a slant, open their mouths, and just suck in all the water to eat all the krill.
It's very cool.
If you end up in a whale's mouth, it's completely accidental.
Yeah, they couldn't be more nice.
I think just anything, and I've been snorkeling anything that i see that's
that i feel in my head is too big it is very scary like you know that they're not going to
do anything to you but just the pure size of them is very intimidating yeah i was snorkeling once i
saw a rainbow fish and it was maybe this big i turned around around and I swam, I don't know,
maybe like probably not a quarter mile,
but like what felt like a quarter mile to the boat
was like, this isn't for me.
Fish?
Rainbow fish.
I once saw a barracuda.
Like, it was ginormous.
And I tweeted last night.
I was like, I have an irrational fear of barracudas.
Whenever I snorkel, I'm always scared
that a barracuda is going to come and bite me.
Yeah. I've also heard that barracudas. Whenever I snorkel, I'm always scared that a barracuda is going to come and bite me. Yeah. I've also heard that barracudas just like really shiny
things. Yes. And I swim with my jewelry
on. Oh, wow. Yeah.
Barracuda's wet dream.
Yeah, literally. So when I was swimming
in the ocean recently, I was like,
I feel like a barracuda is going to come out at any moment.
So I immediately got out of the water. But
barracudas are... You know Finding Nemo?
Of course. When the mom gets killed, that's a barracuda.
Oh, spoiler.
Yeah, sorry.
If you haven't seen Finding Nemo, sorry.
But yeah, that's what kills the mom.
Those big ass skinny fish with the big teeth.
Is it like a snake?
No, they have fins.
Okay.
I don't think I've actually seen Finding Nemo.
Are you sure you saw a rainbow fish?
Because they look like the size of a goldfish.
I don't know if it was a rainbow fish.
Maybe it was a parrotfish?
It was a sunfish?
Or a sunfish.
Those are really big.
It was a fish that was rainbow color.
I'm just saying rainbow fish.
But yeah, it was probably about this big.
It could have been a parrotfish.
Those are multicolored.
Where were you?
I don't know. I think maybe in the Caribbean. Yeah yeah it's definitely probably a parrotfish or something like that probably um i'm surprised you can snorkel because i saw you tread water and
that seemed to be like not great struggle so i don't know is it because you you can easily tread
water for over an hour you said yes okay yes i actually funny
enough i re-watched that video today of my original one and i went just over four minutes
i probably could have gotten to about four and a half maybe close to five caleb was poking me with
a broom which made it and i tried to get him out of there and i just grabbed it um but i made about
four minutes 10 seconds pathetic performance i'm just not in aquatic
person i'm not a good swimmer i'm okay i can survive i think i guess maybe that's the wrong
term because i'm not a strong um yeah i would guess i would just stay away from currents
yeah now that the stories with like riptides like i'm not going in past my waist yeah my dad got ever again once it's very
scary survived yeah yes he's alive okay god yeah that shit's really scary yeah that's why i'm scared
of the ocean because there's just so many things that can go wrong yeah they're all foreign yeah
yeah that book 20 000 leagues under the sea how big big is a league? Is that a measurement?
I don't even know what that is.
What?
I don't even know what that is.
It's a famous book.
Very famous book, yeah.
Oh, but what's a league?
Oh, yeah.
I don't know how long a league is, but that's a great book.
I also don't know the book, but I was asking.
You don't know the book?
No.
Captain Ahab?
Oh, I've heard of him.
I didn't know that was...
It's not that book.
Captain Ahab is M, I've heard of him. I didn't know that was... It's not that book. Captain Ahab is Moby Dick.
Yeah.
No.
Who's the guy that has a sub in 20,000 Leagues?
Oh, Captain Nemo.
Oh, is that who it is?
I'm not sure.
I haven't heard of him.
I only know the name of the book.
I don't really know anything else besides it.
I did read this book when I was like 10 years old.
So he was...
Yeah.
And Captain Nemo in that book was just like...
It refers to the distance, not the depth.
Traveled.
Okay.
Yeah, so I think in that book,
he's like a really rich guy who has this sub.
And then I was always wondering,
I was like, why doesn't Elon Musk have his own just like private sub?
And then after the whole Titanic thing,
it was like, yeah, maybe subs aren't the best
idea i don't think i would ever get into a stick of a yacht yeah that shit's terrifying yeah before
the before the whole no totally i think it'd be pretty cool but before that like if you're doing
like i'm sure i would but i'm too if you i wouldn't want to be you can get out yourself
i feel like it's not that bad me and my friends had a uh we bought a boat that could sleep six
people and i didn't even like a boat that could sleep six people.
And I didn't even like being in that thing, like down in the...
Underneath?
Yeah, in the bed.
It was just too cramped.
I was like, I don't like this.
You ever been on a cruise ship?
No, never.
I would never in a million years go on a cruise ship.
I've heard too.
Because it just seemed...
Midnight buffets?
Unlimited ice cream?
The idea of a cruise ship, for sure.
The actual going on a cruise ship with thousands of people in a big-ass boat.
It's just like, again, it's too scary for me.
Saw my first titty on a cruise ship.
Single.
One titty?
I imagine a lot of titties come out on cruise ships.
People are doing crazy dives and shit.
She was just adjusting and trying to get a sun bath and i was probably like 12 years old and i was like i would do like a private or like a small
cruise like with like 50 people i went with like my family it was like extended family i think
they were like 12 or 15 of us so did you do like disney cruise no i was i don't know carnival or
real cruise like that bill burry just talks way too much
shit on cruises and cruise people that i could never i would never do it i'd just feel trashy
if i went on a cruise as well as a as a teen one of the funner things you can do because
don't they have like the teen clubs yes but they're like also once you get out they get
down and dirty in the teen clubs once you get out into international waters. They get down and dirty in the teen clubs. Once you get out into international waters,
I could go to a casino and drink at like 16.
Yeah, that's fun.
Which was incredible.
The one time I went on a cruise,
I think I was 13 or maybe 12.
No, I was 12.
So I wasn't allowed to hang out with the teens.
I had to hang out with the tweens.
It's just 11 and 12.
My older brother, all of my cousins were just doing cool shit, drinking with the tweens and it's just like my older brother all my cousins were just like doing cool
shit drinking with the teens i was in the tween club and there was this chick she was not the
best looking girl and she started like stalking me around the cruise she was also in the tween
club and it just it ruined the entire trip every time walk around the cruise i'm just trying to hide from this yeah i've heard like like people like have like their
cruise boyfriends like they meet your like lovers on the in the teen club and you drink and like
people get crazy on cruises yeah it's not me you're just looking at one titty yeah i'll never forget it yep was it like a mom's a mom's
no it was like a hot woman let's go it's good very rarely do you get the single boob
no there was a trend on tiktok where there was so i was scrolling on tiktok on um whatever like
two or three weeks ago.
And the TikTok was a Morgan Wallen song.
And the caption was, if you hear your man listening to this song, take his phone from him or something.
Or listening to this sound.
So I clicked on the sound.
And it was just these women facing the camera.
And then they would turn around and just pop one boob out.
And that was it.
That was the trend.
What's the hashtag you know when
i told my guy friends that they they asked the same thing and i went to go show them and then
they were all taken down ah yeah so i don't know if it was just like a one-time thing but it was
probably the craziest thing i've ever seen in my life they were just one boob popping out every
single time would you rather have one large boob or three smaller ones?
I don't know.
I feel like one would look really weird.
Yeah, I feel like maybe three smaller ones.
Three like...
Because in the human eye to mind, it's like symmetry is beautiful.
Classically, right?
Yeah.
So one...
And then just be like hanging like...
Three is also not symmetrical though. I i know but like it kind of looks a little bit more yeah four is what you're shooting for
four would just be like utters yeah yeah yeah how about for balls would you rather have one
large ball or three small ones funny you should ask um my old
my old roommate had testicular cancer and uh no he's fine and he's funny about it um he would
you know most normal people are like yeah put in a prosthetic so it looks symmetrical he just went
with one because he thought it was funny and he would he would like always whip it out and and there would just be like one deflated side of his sack so i'm gonna go with more uh because it
it does look weird although funny so i was going through all the eclipse today
and when we met sweet potato is it sweet potato pat is that that who it was? Yes. I think that's the name, yeah.
It was Nick's friend who has the one giant nut.
That was one of the crazier videos.
We all went in there and went in groups of one to three people.
Oh, I remember that. And then we revealed this testicle.
It was like it kind of, it almost like.
Oh my God, I can't believe what i just witnessed
sass you have no idea what you're watching this at home and i was like
i can't believe i'm watching guys look at someone else's ball
it's incredibly impressive how quickly you guys are able to pull up these clips yeah it really is
can you just search it on twitter? So it was actually huge?
Was it the size of a grapefruit or something?
It was the size of a sweet potato.
I think I saw a picture.
I didn't see it live, but I remember being aghast.
A sweet potato?
Like a big sweet potato.
I'm literally quaking in my boots.
I'm so glad I didn't bring Ruiz in.
Wait, did he just have one ball?
Or just one was really big And one was
One was really big
That's crazy
Did he get checked out by a doctor
Make sure he's okay
I think he has
Yeah I think that like
It's fine
And he could
I don't know what the story was
If he can get it
Like
Like
Strunk
Take him down or whatever
But he was like
I don't know
That is crazy god damn yeah one of the one of the more wild things because i mean guys just
being in locker rooms and stuff you see enough yeah everything for the most part similar uh
this was not similar at all this was once in a lifetime yeah i don't know how you even
deal with that because like there's no way that guy can wear like these shorts or like the shorts
that can't even like joggers that guy cannot wear joggers i don't know how that guy goes to the
bathroom is it i don't want to ask too well we i don't know yeah i don't know the logistics of all that
right right just sounds like very cumbersome good tough life uh i don't know why i saw this
uh maybe it was going viral like a decade ago but like some guy who has like the biggest balls
in the world wears like a hoodie upside down.
Have you seen this?
I feel like I've seen it a long time ago.
And he like takes public transportation.
He puts them in the hood?
Yeah.
Well, like they're not bare.
Like they're in.
They're covered.
Yeah, they're covered.
But like.
How does he know that's not just like a tumor
i don't know it's like that south park thing where he puts his balls in the barrel
132 pounds scrotum i mean that's just kind of sad like you just have to live that's very sad
kind of just like as a tumor yeah that. How's he not jacked?
Just from walking around?
Yeah.
Just those massive quads.
I'm having weird, it's just so unfortunate.
That's crazy.
I wonder if his penis is really small.
Yeah, I mean, comparatively to his nuts, I would think. Yeah, that's true.
There's no way they're proportional.
A dong would look like the smallest thing possible there that would be crazy that guy probably shoots the fucking
biggest loads he's dead oh oh man well rest in peace to him i'm sure he has tj's laughing his
ass off he doesn't have to carry those things around anymore. Yeah, maybe he's at peace now.
49.
I mean, it was like almost 10 years ago.
That's a really funny headline.
They could say his name in the headline.
Like, come on.
That's not fair to this man.
132-pound scrotum guy.
That's just what your note has in your obituary.
Did they say how he died, TJ?
I mean. Like, did he
die just from having large balls?
From a non-scrotum health issue.
Oh, man.
And that just stinks.
Tried to do a backflip. Knocked
himself out cold.
Damn, that's tragic. RIP to that man.
RIP to a 132 pound scrotum man scrotum guy uh tj we hit this wheel
oh god yeah by by sitting on the show you're subject to it but which could also be good we
got a wheel reset yesterday i hope it's carbone we could all be going to carbone which would be
huge because everyone wants to go and we have not actually i don't say we haven't come my stomach
is growling i I'm so hungry.
Carbone's the only thing left on my New York bucket list before moving to Chicago.
Is it really?
Well, I don't know.
I can't really think of anything I really want to do in New York.
There's a few restaurants that are better than Carbone, I think.
What is Carbone?
Italian restaurant.
They lost their Michelin star.
Bernadine.
I asked Francis.
I was like, what's better, Carbone or Bernadine?
And he almost looked offended.
He was like, are you seriously asking?
Of course it's Bernadine.
Are they two Michelin star or one Michelin star?
Three Michelin star?
Damn.
Is that the best?
I think three, yeah.
Yeah, Carbone's a tad overrated.
I've only been there once, and I had to wake up at like 10 a.m. to get a reservation for like a month in advance.
Every place like that is not going to live up to the hype.
Yeah, but I've only been to one Michelin star restaurant once, and it was fabulous.
So I feel like if you lose your Michelin star, that speaks volumes.
I don't know how you maintain it.
And I was – or this is going to make me sound dumb.
But the Michelin – It's based off Michelin tires.
Is the Michelin – is it the same parent company?
Yeah.
So what it used to be was Michelin would give people the Michelin stars because it's worth it to travel to this restaurant.
Yeah, that's it.
Because Michelin tires.
And now it's become this coveted thing.
But yeah.
You ever change a tire?
No, I do not know how to change a tire.
I'm very much the typical girl that needs to call their dad when...
It used to be my biggest fear.
And I did it once like uh maybe like five
six years ago the great accomplishment i don't know if i ever felt more like a man
and when i held up that flat tire after i changed it and you had a spare tire in your car i think
all cars come with a spare tire right yeah they have like a shitty one yeah i think yeah it's not
like um it's not like as good of quality. So it looks a little bit smaller.
It's like a donut.
I think.
Yeah.
You can't like just keep it on there.
You drive it for a day or so and you take it to the shop and they can,
they can get you a new one.
Yeah.
No,
I don't know anything about like getting the oil change,
changing a tire.
I also don't drive a car anymore.
So it's like,
but yeah,
it's unfortunate. Yeah. I don't drive a car anymore so it's like but yeah it's unfortunate yeah i don't know
a lot about cars i don't even think i'm gonna have a car in chicago really are you living in
the city yeah okay do you need a car in chicago is it like not a walkable city i feel like it is
i've been there like once but only for like two days yeah i mean there's not as many subways as new york um so it it helps but if you're living
downtown you can get by without one okay yeah yeah um you're looking forward to the most
about going out there donnie um having a larger than a one bedroom apartment. Yeah. So yeah, that's going to be nice.
The lake is a solid substitution for the ocean.
I mean, I'm a huge ocean guy.
I love it.
But when you're on the lake, it feels like... Lake Michigan is like the ocean.
It's enormous.
Don't they have their own tides?
Yeah, I think so.
And it's cool that you can just swim like right off the city.
It'd be like if you could swim right off of Fidei.
You did. Yeah. I did. Most people... i was fine um yeah i wouldn't recommend that for most
people but like in chicago you walk along the lake right near the downtown area and people are just
floating in tubes and zoopy does a 7 a.m. swim every Friday morning. I'm going to join him.
Yeah, you should.
It seems awesome.
It's like a lot of people.
I went swimming out there when I was there with Tom Lay in May.
I kind of forgot how cold it would be.
So we jumped in and I was like, oh, fuck this.
But no, it's very cool.
Yeah, Chicago summers I feel like are awesome.
You go there like every other month?
Not that frequently, but I've visited Tom probably five-ish times, five or six probably.
Tom is Rico's cousin.
Rico's cousin.
Rico Bosco?
Yeah.
Was in New York working for Barstool and then moved to Chicago, who you remain good friends with and visit often.
He used to be in New York.
Me and Tom went out to Chicago just to film some vids for a week. And at the end of that week,
I guess the,
the Chicago cameraman at the time had to go to rehab.
So Tom got a call from loud Sean and was like,
Hey,
uh,
you're not going back to New York.
You're just staying in Chicago.
And that hasn't been back since.
That's real.
This was three years ago.
That's crazy.
Obviously he's come back to visit
and stuff but yeah he went out with me it was only supposed to be five days he got a call while he
was there that he's now the chicago camera guy that's crazy yeah i never had to deal with loud
sean but i've only heard crazy stories about him yeah like like loud sean yeah i don't know i'm kind of i like sober loud sean i have seen
that video of him saying singing karaoke which is very funny yeah yeah i like drunk loud sean
yeah i'm very sad about everybody moving to chicago it makes me very so your best friend
is now moved today no she moves on Monday.
Okay.
Yeah.
We were having a bit of a moment yesterday.
It was very sad.
You guys were like, was it the rundown chairs or right next to it?
Yeah, we did like a little music video on TikTok and like saying bye to the office. And she has like a going away party tonight.
And then, yeah, she moves on Monday.
I'm mostly sad about her obviously but
like i'm so sad about like everybody else like like the whole yak like it's just like it's just
i feel like all of my friends are leaving yeah but i mean it's and i already feel like there
are some things planned where you know we're looking months ahead and it's like all right
i gotta be in new york for this weekend and whatever so i'm hoping there's a lot of like
cross collaboration where people come and yeah it's that type of thing but
yeah it definitely does feel like a big change totally feels like a big change especially as
someone that's like staying i'm just like damn it stinks i think the first month is going to be
tough for us too in chicago before we can move into the new office because
their current office is pretty packed and there's going to be like another 25 people in it right
i've heard that the new office is going to open on time for the most part with not like fully okay
like the yak studio will be open the pmt studio will be open. The cave should be ready.
Like, those type of things.
But the other stuff, they will have to, like, finish building.
Yeah.
I mean, based off Hank's video, I was like,
it does not look like it's going to be done anytime soon.
It was still, like, very much like just wood.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I don't know how fast all that stuff happened. Yeah.
I mean, it looks ginormous, so it makes sense.
If we can't play roofball for the first two months, I think we'll live.
No, because the Roofball U.S. Open is September 20-something.
Oh, so they want...
I want to practice.
Oh, are you guys going to play?
Are you in that, Chad?
In KB, you're going to do it, yeah.
Oh, really?
Yeah, I don't think it's been officially confirmed,
but I fully intend to be in Beaverton, Oregon to... Oh think it's been like officially confirmed but like i fully intend to be
in beaverton oregon to oh it's in oregon yes yeah that seems so fun i would love to try to play
sometimes i just think about playing and just i don't i wish i could just do this at my house
yeah i don't have a house that could really do that any house in new jersey i feel like
like i feel like all the houses it was much harder finding a house than you would think.
And even the house that we saw, the founder showed up and was like,
we can't play it regular.
You've got to just hit the pole.
Yeah, you need a pole on your roof.
Or a pipe on your roof, right?
Is that not why you hit a pipe?
Or a pole?
Yeah, you're supposed to go around it.
That's the ideal.
Oh, okay. But when we were warming up that day like going around the pipe is 10 points hitting the pipe supposed to be five
points but in warm-ups we all took like our first throw and like 80 of the people got it around
i was thinking like this is way too,
like there has to be some catch.
So I actually started practicing just straight on
because I was like, there's no way.
Yeah.
And the roof ball guy came and was like,
yeah, we can't play it like traditional.
So sometimes you just have to do ping only.
So we did ping only.
But yeah, that was a fun thing um we originally had
planned for a booth show i wanted everyone to bring like a favorite memory from the act and
we just kind of talked through it you guys are obviously not prepared for that but is there
anything that stand out maybe in your mind and maybe za and tj and connor can go first to buy
you guys some time but is there any type of
moment that stands out for you that just makes you laugh whether it be a clip or
an episode I think um TJ if you want to queue up I think uh the Nick's dad one that is this one
always makes whenever I see whenever I'm sitting in the booth and I'm usually in the spot Connor's
occupying right now and i'm making clips
something that consistently makes me laugh is when brandon laughs because i think like nick and kb
especially like back in the old days used to intentionally do things to try and make brandon
laugh so whenever he and it's not like it's super rare, but whenever Brandon laughs really hard,
I always think it's very funny.
And whenever KB laughs,
which is a little bit more rare,
that's also quite a treat.
So this was one of my favorite clips
from back in the day.
Went well.
Me and some of the fellas got together
for a fantasy draft.
The old man is in my league.
He's in our league.
Straight ass dad?
Straight ass dad. Yeah, first ever all pick. Of course, he loves that shit.'s in our league. Straight-ass dad? Straight-ass dad.
He had first-ever all-pick.
Of course, he loves that shit.
Yeah, he does.
Who did he take?
He must have been drunk or something.
He took Eric Decker.
I mean, Eric Decker, old man.
League in two years.
Prime for a comeback, though.
Great hands, I guess.
I don't know.
I'm trying to figure out why Decker.
Did he go back to, was it chalk after that?
Yeah, pretty much.
Yeah?
Yeah, I don't.
He was on none of our rankings.
Maybe he knows something.
Maybe he knows something that everybody else doesn't know.
This was back in the day when it was serious.
I don't believe we were official at a YouTube show, just judging by the desk desk i think this was in the serious days we didn't have video but you could
see it going early on when like nick and and like brandon's already starting to laugh and it's like
it wasn't like the uh the most like clever thing that's ever been said out of any of those guys
but um it's kind of the way it was set up in the
nick straight dad thing when it started had such a funny thing because he would always try and sneak
in those jokes and the eric decker thing was just like you know maybe the most handsome receiver
that's ever walked the earth it's very on brand for you to choose a fantasy football yes yeah that
is true yeah but uh czar tj did you guys have anything you wanted to share? Connor?
I'll say from my own perspective, like actually being a part of it. Because usually I just watch the show.
I'm upstairs at my desk watching on a laptop.
But being here for Case Race 4, the stinky cloud, was the hardest I've ever laughed.
Because I was out there with you jay yes filming
you in the cloud and i was in the stink with you essentially everybody else is trying to duck from
it i'm like i still have to film i have to get the angle did someone fart in the studio or what was
that oh way more like a stink bomb yeah it was stink bombs and other stuff. So everyone brought in an ingredient or something.
Something that's stinky.
Something stinky, too.
And we ordered this tent.
So I was going to go in the tent for...
I think, did Kate originally get it?
Or I got it?
Well, because you got it.
No, Kate got it.
And then I think you used it for the...
You guys switched.
When your coworkers won't get boosted or stuff like that.
Okay.
It's relatively good.
It's in here.
It's in here.
It's in here right now.
Why is it in here?
It's so bad.
Why is it in here?
So Zot took a piece of his dreadlock off and lit it on fire.
Oh, it just hit me in here.
There was some type of stink bomb.
There was some type of...
This is total chaos, and I love every second of it.
...liquid that smelled like...
It's bad eggs.
It's fucking gross eggs.
Holy shit.
Oh, my God. Why is it... Oh, bad eggs. Oh my god.
Why is it in my face?
I just got it.
Fuck you guys.
That reminds me of
the one episode. I don't know
what the context
was behind the reasoning but
it was like whoever
farted could leave the room and you
can't leave until you fart
that was the first one that you guys did was probably and i i i have the humor of a 12 year
old and so farting just makes me die laughing and that was probably one of the funniest like
compilations i've ever watched like holding the mics up to your butts and farting and some of the farts
were so funny and so gross like when dugs came in and it was like you can if you can't fart you can
get like a celebrity shot from the office he just walked in and he picked up and he was the perfect
can you please pull that up if you have it?
The best part about that was the one-two punch
because it started off with Roan asking one of Glennie's angels,
do you poop out of that thing?
To avoid that.
To avoid that.
So he got out of it.
And then immediately afterwards, or it was either right before or right after,
yeah, then Doug's lets out the truth. Yeah.
He had walked into the studio for 20 seconds.
He didn't know what was coming.
What the fuck was that?
Thank you, Doug.
Thank you.
He had just had five guys.
I know that.
Really?
Yeah.
That is so unbelievably funny.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, and, like, I don't know if it was Big Cat or someone,
but someone had, like, the squeakiest.
Like, it was just so, so funny.
I enjoyed speaking of gross shit like that.
One of my favorite moments doesn't even involve regular Yak crew
when Quigs came on and talked about shitting himself at the indian wedding oliver's kurda yeah yeah that sticks out to me
quigs is an all-time character graphic god you guys have like a really wide reach so i i found it hilarious when you spent the entire um yak
making fun of that guy who did the rizzed up livy oh yeah yeah rizzed up livy and then like right
afterwards he tweeted a photo of him wearing yak merch oh come on guys i'm a fan sound off in the
comments yeah actually the uh the sass like imitating him that killed me i watched that so many times
one of um the ones that big cat would do would always make me laugh too when he's like
um the weekend won't pop his top off but drake tops his pop off all the time he couldn't like
get it right it was so funny he went through a big stage and this was like pretty recently
where he just had the ring light.
The one with Sidney Sweeney is also a really funny one, too.
We might be done with that.
I don't know if he wants to do those anymore.
That's fair.
Because, yeah, he would say sometimes when we would record him, like, I feel so dumb doing this.
But it was fun.
It was interesting to edit, but it was fun.
Yeah.
Another one that
comes to mind is just recency bias but when i was on the show and we did um fishbowl and
kate said charlotte johansson that was so funny i don't know if you guys remember
yeah this no this was when we played fishbowl um like two or three weeks ago. Oh, yeah. Salad Bowl. Sorry. My friends from college call it Fish Bowl.
But I forget what the paper said, but someone said, she said Charlotte Johansson instead
of Scarlett Johansson.
And it was so funny.
That game always makes me laugh.
Sorry, TJ.
Did you have any ones from your years of experience
doing this show my favorite episode was when we uh the nick toe surgery episode oh yeah that entire
sequence i i think i just cry laughing the entire episode is that when he had like a like a goose
out of the box he had an ingrown toe so we had kb try to remove it the toenail yeah it turned into
literally them just doing surgery on nick's foot with like i had like hospital music like ambiance playing in the background and then security guard dan
whipped out like oh yeah the bottle of vodka yeah that was so funny that's an all-time that's i
think that's my favorite episode and that like even became a meme that picture of him like holding up
the bottle of vodka out of the backpack yeah or. Or was that different? No, that was it.
The same, yeah.
Yeah, that was so funny.
What about you?
So on the farts trend,
the one that sticks to me, your BFF,
I think was her first appearance.
We had the little...
Oh, yeah, they did the fart prank on her?
Yeah, the fart machine.
That thing sends me every single time I see it.
She kept her cool.
And she was just talking through the whole thing.
So this was when we had a machine that would fart.
This is like her first day.
This is very early in her part.
I don't think it's her first day.
Yeah, she looks so young.
But we asked.
Yeah, it's a good spot.
Yeah.
Those are not the best spots for Megan.
And who peaked as a show?
Yeah, this is bad.
So it's like Red Bull.
He said something.
That's the best episode ever.
He does talk like he's from Birmingham, Alabama.
She's just not even acknowledging it at all.
And then more recently, Che, your brand new,
I see this clip every single time and I die,
the brand new way to piss.
Oh, yes.
Any out-of-pocket Che moment?
Every single time. G yeah that it that did that's a mil
a mil a million views on tiktok right i i think it's uh like 1.3 million or something like that
insanely well on instagram too people love the new way to piss yeah summer 2023 i saw some people
doing it when i was at the beach there are also a bunch of comments
where it's like who the fuck is this
the way you just end the argument
with Brandon
he's dead he has no way to respond
he's a dead man
he's like 20 feet under the ground
it was unbelievable
Brandon gets so much
shit from everyone and like kind of
deservedly so he brings it on himself but um i do miss brandon and being around him as part of the
show because he's fun guy to interact with um yeah fun is a tough word for me oh yeah yeah
he's just he was always he was never really that nice to me really not very bubbly
yeah no i disagree he dms me all the time check in oh that's nice guy i like brandon
what does he say to you over dm uh chuck the last thing he said to me was
yeah like i'll walk by in the hallway stats and be like hey and he'll be like fuck you and i'm just like okay how are you shut up on saturday at 11 49 a.m he said let's dominate today
this is an unlikely friendship yeah we've discovered yeah it's pretty regular i would
have assumed you guys have never spoken oh no, no. No, me and Brandon are cool. Hell yeah. Wow.
That's great.
He's very into Suits right now.
The show?
The show, yeah.
I used to love that.
I used to watch that.
I loved Meghan Markle.
Meghan Markle.
Now I could use a little less, but back in the day when she was on Suits, loved her.
She's out of touch with reality.
You're a princess, right?
What's that?
You're part of the Commonwealth.
Yeah, true. No, they're not're part of the Commonwealth. Yeah, true.
They're not a part of the royal family anymore.
That's a good point, yeah.
They abdicated.
I don't know if that's the right word for prince,
but yeah, he left his knees, renounced his duties.
TJ, I got a clip that I think would be challenging
for you to pull up.
I think it was young Dolph shortly after his death.
KB said something terrible.
I'm not sure you clipped that.
Yeah.
But that was one of my favorite moments.
Something cool got shot yesterday.
I think that was it.
I think that was it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That made me laugh quite a bit.
I don't think that we clipped that,
but that,
that clip does exist. Yeah exists somewhere yeah i couldn't find this clip i'd love it if somebody
could dm it to me the back in the when we used to do friday vibes which r.i.p those were very
very fun and we had music rights on on serious when Nick did the Nickelback song with Chad Kroger.
Do any of you guys know what I'm talking about?
Which song?
Chad Kroger, Waiting to Come.
Was it Rockstar?
I think it was Rockstar.
I think I remember now what you're talking about.
Yeah.
I don't know.
Yeah.
Didn't quite hit me.
I didn't know the Yak.
I was looking for it earlier today
i could not find it it's the i put together like my top couple yak clips and um that that would
have certainly been up there but i could not find it yeah but uh yeah do you guys have anything else
anything heading into the weekend uh watch my ever series conclusion just there the finale just
there yeah yeah yeah big cat has a cameo and then i
dropped a stella blue music video in the middle of it it's fantastic by the way it came out well
i think let's go yeah who shoots yourself michelangelo was right me on that trip okay yeah
yeah and then i just i called up big cat and was like i need a copter back to Kathmandu or else I would have had to hike for like six days.
And I was like, if you pay for the copter, I'll make you a Stella Blue music video up at base camp.
And he was just like, well, expense at the barstool and say that I said it was OK.
And then if they don't pay it, I'll just threaten to quit.
And that's what I did. and the helicopter got paid for he got his music video was it still expensive in um where where is man of verse again
the paul paul yeah okay um it ended up just being 9 50 per person which i mean like it's not
$950 yeah better than i figured it would be yeah no i thought it was going to be like 3k a person 9.50 per person which I mean like it's not horrible 950 dollars? yeah
that's better than I figured
it would be
yeah no
I thought it was gonna be
like 3k a person
yeah
yeah
um
it's called
Brewing Up The Blue
definitely watch it
you can
you can pull it up
it's only like
two minutes long
or something
yeah let's air that
Soul Blue music video
yeah we'll do some
we'll do some promo
Sam and Sunset one
that has copyrighted is so good.
No, shout out
Riffy Beats. He made the beat for me
for free. Hell yeah, Riffy.
And then we have
to spin the wheel too?
Oh, we did? Oh, shit.
Can we play one game of Sporkle?
The audience is not big fans of Sporkle they're not oh damn okay yeah we get messages
every day do not do sport really well i mean especially podcast listeners like yeah yeah
that's true you're like i don't even know what i'm looking at or hearing i guess you guys playing
the daily dozen trivia game yeah very. Very fun. So fun.
It's gotten a lot easier after everyone was complaining that it's like, I feel like they can never win.
People either say it's too easy or it's too hard, but I love it.
And it's good practice for when the season starts back up again.
I feel like.
Oh, yeah.
I keep thinking like we're, because you don't play regularly.
You like, you get, you just get notified just like, hey, can you guys play next week or whatever.
Yeah.
Yes, right.
We're not in season.
Yeah, no, I'm very excited for the season to start back up again.
But I'll never get the sports questions, right, ever.
You're Rookie of the Year, right?
Yeah, I was.
Good for you.
Thanks, thanks.
We had a bit of a letdown of a playoff run,
but we'll come back stronger next season, Hawkers.
Hey, Jay, do you guys ever miss like not being able to take live callers like you used to do on serious yes and no because i do like
the live caller aspect but you have to think like they're also i feel like it's another person that
has to like screen those calls and like you have say, all right, be on hold or whatever. And so sometimes you'll have,
whatever it was,
10 phone lines lit up.
You don't really want to take calls,
but we have calls.
So yes and no.
Linda from Georgia is a great legendary caller
who would call in from time to time.
She called into Pick Central last week.
Did she?
She says, I forgot to deliver that message.
Yeah, Linda's the best.
So yeah, yes uh in some aspects but i think the show you know when we started the show was roan carabas and big cat so yeah three people
so like you kind of needed calls now the show is seven people plus the booth so like you know that's yeah more than enough mouths to fill the
space so sure i think it's also like unpredictable you never know like what people are going to say
yeah and some like all-time yakumans are calls like gar um the the guy with the
enterprise rental car which was a really long time ago which is a deep cut
but yeah a lot of our a lot of really good moments are from those.
But you also have not great moments on our calls.
So it balances out.
Do we have that Stella Blue music vid?
Wanton Don.
Stella Blue Coffee.
Everest Base Camp
Check it
What's a man gotta do for a pot of joe
In a place like this where the copters go
Everest Base Camp where there's lots of snow
If I don't get some coffee then I gots to go
But that's when I saw something out my dreams
A big fat sack of them magic beans
In my pants I was about to cream
Good thing base camp had the right machine
Brewing up the blue for what we about to do
Brewing up the blue, finna take it to the roof
Brewing up the blue, cause we need a little boost
Brewing up the blue, this cup's for you
But to tell you the truth, I haven't taken a
poo, in the last five days, this shit really ain't cool, don't wanna go down in history as the
constipated fool, took a trip to the mounds and didn't die in K2, but passed away at base camp
cause he couldn't push through, so I called a big cat and told him make me a brew, that can loosen
my stool, make me go number two two and put your dog on the front.
You know that shit would be cute.
Now I'm poop, poop, pooping on the roof of the world.
Yeah, I'm poop, poop, pooping.
Know it all to your girl.
Now I'm poop, poop, pooping.
Got my shit unblocked.
Yeah, I'm poop, poop, pooping Stella Blue on top.
Brewing up the blue for what we about to do.
Brewing up the blue, finna take it to the roof.
Brewing up the blue,na take it to the roof Brewing up the blue
Cause we need a little boost
Brewing up the blue
This cup's for you
Spent eight days trekking just to get where I'm at
But now I'm kinda worried how I'm supposed to get back
Never been a big fan of retracing my steps
And the air's so thin I keep on catching my breath
Really miss my hotel pool.
Back in Kathmandu.
What would Big Cat do if he was in my shoes?
Probably just pay for a helicopter because he's rich.
But maybe he'd pay for mine too, cause I'm in a pinch.
Get a helicopter for about 2 to 3K tops, and that includes both me and Michelangelo.
No matter what, it's paid for.
We will try to make Barstool pay for it.
If not Barstool, we'll make Stella Blue pay for it.
If not Stella Blue, I will quit.
We got the green light, the helicopter's a go.
I know it's hard to say bye, but I'm needed below. Best of luck to my homies who going straight to the top. I will quit.
This is awesome. Things could be worse, so keep pushing, keep climbing, even when shit hurts. But do as I say, though, not as I do.
Cause my cop that just arrived paid my Stella blue.
The easy way out never looks so cool.
Big cap, I stole, I do, thank you.
Brewing up the blue for what we about to do.
Brewing up the blue, finna take it to the roof.
Brewing up the blue, cause we need a little boost. Brewing up the blue, this take it to the roof brewing up the blue because we need a little boost brewing up the blue this cup's for you brewing up the blue for what we about to do brewing up
the blue finna take it to the roof shout out Stella Blue for getting me a cup
great way to take us into the weekend oh yeah that was awesome Donnie thank you thank you guys
how long did that take you to make um didn't like write the song uh so like
when i was up at base camp i only had like maybe four of the lines written and then just a general
idea of like what i was gonna be rapping about and the rest of it so then we just like filmed some
b-roll shots and then when i got back like i don't know finish the rest in a few days or
okay that makes sense yeah fuck you impressive nice great way to take us into the weekend thank
you guys for hopping on the act today thank you everybody for for watching uh we'll see you monday
it's the act peace out We'll be right back. Yankees love Islayac. Islayac.