The Yak - Lil Sas Can't Handle the Spice | The Yak 6-12-23
Episode Date: June 12, 2023Top your pop offYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hello.
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Hello, everyone's here.
Yes.
Yay.
Good to see you all.
Nick, welcome back.
Yeah, thank you guys.
How was it?
Great.
I was at my apartment.
I was just working from home.
Oh.
Nick, I have a question for you.
Someone told me that if Brandon hadn't answered that question correctly
for Kirk's team against the Frankettes,
everything would have been different.
Is that true?
Man, who's to say?
I mean, yeah, we did lose in overtime to them.
But really, who's to say? Who's, yeah, we did lose in overtime to them. But really, who's to say?
Who's to say?
This is last week's.
But I really do feel like, truly, honestly, you know how if you're just on a team for a little bit, you get a ring?
Yeah.
Brandon's name should be on the trophy.
That's true.
With those guys.
It's part of the championship DVD.
Yeah.
We did a yak Friday.
You're like that guy. Did the clean out. The. We did a yak Friday. You're like that guy.
Did the clean out.
The ALS that blocked the punt.
Like, you weren't Drew Brees, but you were him.
Yeah.
Steve Gleason.
Steve Gleason.
Sure.
Most famous moment was when Mincy did his welcome back video in front of Steve Gleason's
statue.
That's when we remember him.
Yeah, you may know him from that.
Steve Gleason's life, yes.
Brandon, you could have stopped all this
We did
Dozen clean up
On the yak on Friday
We
I wasn't there
I didn't
I missed it
I didn't even watch
I don't remember
I wasn't here
What did you guys say?
Me and Che were there
We made him
We cleaned it up
We finished off the dozen
What was it?
I don't remember
I think it could be
Some other people could interject
That weren't there We could clean up some more What I it? I don't remember. I think it could be some other people could interject that weren't there.
We could clean up some more.
What I've realized is that you as a man can be treated like shit over and over, and you'll
come crawling back no matter what, so there's no reason for any of us to be kind.
Mm-hmm.
Right.
But you guys haven't been kind.
Yeah.
Right, and here you are.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So why, what's the point?
You're right.
When you were homeless, I did make you sleep outside.
You ruined the one friendship you have to then kill yourself in future form.
He did.
I did.
I did.
Answer the easiest question of all time.
Of all time.
That was a big fuck up.
You let Kirk play you.
He didn't blame me.
Yeah, he did.
I just do.
He said he knew that everyone else in the room knew it.
Yeah.
Well, I...
He had locked eyes.
I shit the bed.
I'm pretty sure Kirk will be fine with your name real small on the trophy.
We didn't lock eyes.
No, I locked eyes with him.
Oh.
All right.
Did it feel really bad, Brandon?
I didn't sleep well.
I haven't really since.
What feels bad about it?
He didn't force him to go out to dinner with us. He was so
broken. I did. Really? We pulled him off the
street. It was me, Eddie, Clem, and Jerry and we're like
Brandon come eat with us. He's like
fine and then we went to dinner and
he just was just looking at his
Twitter the whole time like
I actually
he had tears in his eyes like he
was a little misty eyed. He's a man of the people because he rewards people who are mean to him
by letting what they say get to him.
That is a true man of the people.
You let it all wash over you and you feel and internalize all of it.
Yeah, you let the people control you.
Okay, I do do that.
I'm working on that.
But it was fine.
It's just trivia.
Just bar trivia, that's all.
Fun little game we play.
Bar trivia. Why aren't you meaner all. Fun little game we play. Bar trivia.
Why aren't you meaner to these guys?
I don't know.
Look at them.
How do you just take this?
You guys can't say Kirk's mean to me.
You guys are assholes to me too.
That's weakness.
I just asked a question.
I don't know how to fight back.
Asking a question is mean?
I can't sit and watch this any longer.
You're going to deny being an asshole to me?
I asked a question.
Questions mean?
They can be, yes.
They absolutely can be.
I texted you mid-match.
I said, attaboy, Brandon.
I texted you the morning of, and I said, when?
You did.
No, I didn't.
Did you text me the next morning?
I think I sent you a photo of you answering their question.
I took you out to dinner after.
And then what did you send me on Saturday?
Same photo.
And Sunday?
I actually sent the same photo.
Yeah.
It is nice, though, not being attached to anything
and then just getting into it right before it ends.
Like, I watch the last...
That's you with every sport.
That's your entire life.
It's like they lose, and you're like,
oh, that sucks, and then you just move on.
You grew up as an experts fan,
and then all of a sudden you're a Minahan fan.
I mean, I watched
the final day. I wanted Brandon to win
and then he lost. I was like, ah, whatever.
Foreman's was breathtaking.
How can you say I was being mean to you
when I forced friendship on you
afterwards for dinner?
Where'd you guys eat?
Went to a bar down the street.
We had some nice appetizers.
Brandon got extra side tater tots for himself.
Yes.
Did.
Yeah.
That sounds nice.
I got a $2 side of tater tots.
You took inventory of that?
Well, no.
You just, when we had finished the order, you're like, oh, and throw in a side tater
tots for yourself.
I want some tater tots.
That's $0.10 a cup afterwards.
It's hard to miss.
Comfort tots.
Mm-hmm.
I didn't order a $20 appetizer.
I ordered tater tots.
KB, I'll say this is why it's okay to be mean to Brandon now.
Because he's going to win the whole shebang in the future.
And he's going to drag ball sack across all of our.
I think it's very fine to be mean to him.
You don't have an ounce of fight back.
He's just waiting to win.
He's waiting to win.
Why not?
I fight back.
I often fight back.
You're just waiting to win. Take it a lot. You. I often fight back. You're just waiting to win.
Take it a lot.
You've got to throw very individualized shots at these people.
Why would I take shots?
I'm not going to take shots at Nick.
Nick's right.
I fucked up.
You fucked yourself.
It's bar trivia.
It's not like we have uniforms and look like North Korean generals with badges.
It's just bar trivia.
With thousands of people watching live and hundreds of thousands watching after the fact.
It's your show, as you've said many times.
It still is.
It still is.
This is a setup for something huge for you, and you're going to be a dickhead.
What did I tell you?
I don't know.
When I said, look at the positive for it, you're basically the Cubs.
You just keep losing.
Eventually, people will root for you to win.
Lovable losers. Yeah, and I said that six more just keep losing. Eventually, people will root for you to win. Lovable losers.
Yeah, and I said that six more years of you losing, I will eventually root for you to win.
Why are we doing this?
You lost, too.
There we go.
No, we weren't even there.
You lost.
You lost.
No one even remembers us.
We were there, too.
I haven't watched the match yet.
Yeah, no, no, no.
It's a spoiler, first of all.
And second of all, it wasn't even close.
Oh, thank God.
We got the doors blown off of us.
So it's not even like there was a fighting chance.
People could have convinced themselves to envision you holding up the trophy.
You went that close.
You could smell it.
You could taste it.
We all wanted to win, too, though.
We did, but when you lose.
Everyone wanted Brandon.
The way you lose when we lost the way we lost.
It fed us our ball sack.
There's nothing you can do.
You can't be like, oh, man, if we had just gotten that one right.
No, I would go as far as to say it wasn't even your fault.
We would have lost a hundred times.
You're agreeing with them?
You're letting that work?
Why are you coaching me?
I'm trying to help you out.
I don't need you to coach me.
Why don't you show up today as my coach?
You got the doors blown off of them.
You have a lot of ammo.
We didn't even make the playoffs, Brandon.
We didn't even make the final four.
That was me.
We did have, when we got in the green room after, we got absolutely shellacked.
White Sox Dave was like, damn, you guys got killed.
I was like, you didn't even make the tournament.
Yeah.
Yeah, it is.
A mess.
He was waiting on me when I got back there, too.
What'd he say?
I don't even remember, but I know he sat by my side for 15 minutes.
And every time somebody would come in, he spoke for me.
He would be like
yeah you got to give him some time it's rough for him right now shut the fuck up dude god damn i
spilled my water on my phone holy shit he put a cap on it next time that was insane how often am
i gonna tell you to put a cap on your water? He loses the caps immediately. He just takes them off and throws them away.
Brandon, why don't you take 10?
Brandon, you're going to come back.
You're going to win.
Yeah, and he's going to be the worst.
Yeah, so that's why, Kyle, we have to relish in his losses.
We're giving him ammunition.
Yeah.
You said this last year.
Yeah, and next year we'll say the same thing.
All right.
Hey, Francis.
Did Jeff say who's winning next year yet?
No, not Brandon.
No, not yet.
I think Brandon should join Kirk the Minihands.
Is that a real possibility?
Yeah.
Who would you kick off, though?
I'm not.
Rico.
I'm also talking Rico.
Rico needs to get his own team.
I mean, he's a fucking, he's got to shine.
Yeah, Rico's good.
Rico's very good.
I also, like, people should think of it less as trivia,
and Jeff has said this, more entertainment.
Like what would be the best storylines possible?
It would be Brandon joining Team Minahan,
them running the table in the regular season
and then like losing in the playoffs,
Rico getting his own team, him not winning,
and then Rico and Minahan coming back together and winning again.
Or like if Minahan joins Brandon's team
and Brandon kicks someone off as an absolute
psychopath. Why would he do that? He's a three-time MVP
and a champion. Oh, 100%.
He doesn't. That makes sense
to me, but Brandon, wouldn't you like him
on your team? And who would you kick off your team to have
Minahan on?
Is the live audience, does the live audience
make it harder?
Does that make it harder, the live audience? I think you know what you know and you yeah i was gonna say what makes trivia hard
is that i'm dumb yeah but i feel like you don't get like oh fuck i would have known that if it
was if i was over zoom listen y'all all get dms from baby gronk's dad yeah dms for baby gronk's
dad a while ago asking don't let him change. He's in Austin. He's trying to change.
Frank and Frank
come back next year.
That's just going to be crazy.
You guys
I heard Frank might be
on the trading block.
From who?
Sources?
League sources?
How would it work?
Would he trade both of you
or would you two trade him?
Every time we lose
he's just going to be like
you're going to trade me
to fucking Feidelberg.
It's like such a shot at fucking.
That's what he says.
Does he think you guys are gonna trade him?
I don't think so deep down. He's a showman.
Yeah. Damn good showman.
I would never leave him. No.
We're set in stone.
That's just the
scuttlebutt I heard. Frank is on the
block. You guys come right off
the back. Yeah.
But who would you take?
What categories do you guys need to re-up in?
Especially if you lost him, obviously you'd lose some of the sports stuff,
baseball stuff.
Lose all the sports, all the baseball, all the hockey.
Just wouldn't work.
I got a question for you, Brandon.
Last question.
We can move on.
Okay.
Kirk is phenomenal at trivia.
Like what he did to us was you couldn't, you just sat there and be like,
dude, the guy got every question right.
Good.
Red Monavich.
Very good.
So you expect that.
Is it worse?
Yep.
The Rico part?
Yeah.
I can handle losing to Kirk.
Losing to Rico Bosco has made me question everything about myself as a
human man.
Did Rico pull Durham at the end?
No, the crowd said Durham, and he acted like he pulled it.
How could he act like that?
What do you mean the crowd said Durham?
The crowd said Durham.
I didn't hear that.
You were in the back.
I didn't hear him.
Oh, look at that.
And that was in your face?
He doesn't even know how to smoke cigars.
Barely lit. The guy who doesn't know how to smoke cigars beat you put it off and he put it out in the trash can he went and just threw it in the trash can he almost killed us all good for him
he deserves it man yeah he's a firefighter he could put it out he's the worst person here
he's the worst human being we have i need more i forgot about that now he's a champion you gotta
say champion first wait do you think he's the worst we have he have. Not anymore. I forgot about that. Now he's a champion. You got to say champion first.
Wait, do you think he's the worst we have?
He's close.
Not anymore, he's not.
Yeah.
He's trivia champion slash worst person.
We've got to have worse.
We do.
Gabe Pat.
Gabe Pat.
Oh, yeah.
He's terrible.
He's just a bad guy.
I started to rip Gabe Pat's...
No, in the bathroom what the
dude
there's a flyer
there's a flyer
for their big gay bash
but it's June
it's on June 8th
but it's still up
in the bathroom
so you have to stare
at Joey and Pat
but it's June 8th
so I started to rip it off
but I didn't want to be
the guy that ripped it off
because I didn't want to be that guy why did you have issues with staring at it because it's June 8th, so I started to rip it off, but I didn't want to be the guy that ripped it off because I didn't want to be that guy.
Why do you have issues with staring at it?
Because it's June 8th.
So?
I mean, it's just a picture of anybody.
There's like the original copy of Barstool's newspaper up here.
You're not ripping that down.
A date has passed.
You get soft to pee?
No.
Oh, God, you're a homophobe Rip it off
No I'm not now but I just wanted to
God damn it
Alright
What next
Bad guy
Very mischievous
But Brandon you were such a good showman
On the stage
You just would have been such a good wrestler.
Or, like, you could just tell the cues that you took from that world.
And it just gives people visceral reactions.
Yeah, when he was pretending to be suicidal after the loss.
Yes, yes.
That was great.
I was just sitting there.
They beat me, so I sat there and soaked it up.
I wanted it to hurt.
But your hair was like bouncing around
your hair
you're kind of a piece of shit
no shit
yeah Roan walked up to me
right after Roan walked up to me
and like dap me up and was like hey man
Toph is sorry and I turned around and walked off
and then Roan just
Roan followed me around filming everything I did
it was awesome tweeted it. It was awesome.
Tweeted it out.
It was awesome.
I have more footage that I didn't even tweet out just for a tickler file,
just so I could watch you.
You were seeing the numbies.
You were seeing the numbies, like the Matrix.
Yeah, I was just enjoying how low you were.
You were low.
My house is right on a lake.
It is directly on a lake.
You sent me a photo from the back porch.
Oh, look at this.
You had just told me how
sad you were. But you
sat on the edge of the stage and did that.
So you gave this piece of you,
the most vulnerable and saddest piece of you
to the crowd so they could enjoy it.
And I was giving it to the crowd at home.
What did Kirk say to you?
He was like, you'll never have this.
You'll never get this in your life.
It was about my pet dad.
A lot.
It was a lot.
At least you weren't in the goofiest shirt of all time.
You should just take after Kirk and know more about trivia.
I know plenty.
I didn't play well that night.
I know plenty.
You guys lost too.
We all did.
Barely.
We barely even showed. We had to disband. They were so bad. We all did. Barely. We barely even showed.
We had to disband.
They were so bad.
I haven't played in years.
I was so dumb that I was never invited back.
You made it the furthest and we're all bitter.
Yeah.
What's your favorite casserole?
Ooh.
This feels like a trivia question.
I do want to talk about Baby Gronk because I feel upset for Kyle.
Is this bothering you as much as it's bothering me?
I feel upset for Baby Gronk.
New York Times wrote about it.
Yeah.
I've been praying on his downfall.
I only prayed on his downfall because he was already kind of blown up.
But no, you were the put-on prince with Baby Gronk.
He was on the Dews show this morning.
He was.
Why is everyone coming at the dad, not the kid?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You were explicit.
You said, I don't care about the parents.
It's the boy.
Yeah, he sucks.
He's not doing anything.
What is his thing?
There's no football highlights on his page.
He works out.
We got some.
They sent out some football highlights.
Doing interviews where he's barely talking.
He's not a normal kid, though.
He eats brown rice and salmon.
They're trying to say he's a blue chip recruit already.
Do you think he'll take LSU to the national title?
He's a blue chip recruit for Doritos.
In turn for Cool Ranch.
Red shirt at Ace Hardware.
You think that he'll wind up to, like, what if he's not tall enough to be tight end?
Like, even if he winds up at, like, 6'2", like, he can't be a tight end.
No.
Is that what he's playing?
Yeah.
I think, well, Gronk was a tight end.
I don't know.
We don't know which Gronk he's the baby of.
That's true.
Oh, he could be Gordy.
Is there a fullback?
I just realized his name is, his real name is Madden.
His last name's Madden?
First name.
What?
Yeah.
Wow.
There's now a Baby Diggs.
His real name's incredible.
I saw Baby Diggs.
He's electric.
It's a white kid.
Yeah, he's electric.
It's a white kid.
It's a pudgy little white kid.
Yeah.
Like, yeah, Baby Diggs.
Baby Diggs called out Baby Gronk.
Did he really?
Yeah, he did.
Can you find it, TJ?
Baby Diggs.
I'm buying stock in Baby Diggs.
Baby Diggs is a chubby little boy with long hair.
Wait, we're in on Baby Diggs?
Yeah, in on Baby Diggs.
You have to be, I feel like.
How many baby versions are there going to be?
There's going to be thousands of baby versions that don't bubble up to the surface.
Yeah.
Rewriting all football history as, like, little white boys.
I'm retiring from TikTok from now on.
Bye-bye.
Whoa, he retired?
All right.
Oh, baby digs.
Wait, he's filthy.
Oh.
Yeah, he's damn good.
That's something.
What the fuck?
Oh, baby digs.
Look at those shoes.
That's like Mincy would wear that outfit
to run a 5K. Yeah.
Or for anything else.
Jordan's in the fucking
jersey. Hey, should your son,
should we claim a baby NFL player for him right now?
I've been thinking. I don't know sports well enough.
I'll take suggestions. What about like
just a baby Corey Coleman?
A bust. Yeah.
A baby OJ.
Baby OJ. That hasn't been done yet. It's a bust. Yeah. Baby OJ. Baby OJ.
That hasn't been done yet.
Get him a little tiny Bronco to send him around in.
Instead of football highlights, is baby OJ just getting mad at his parents?
Yeah.
Not being able to control his rage?
Dude, I feel like baby Diggs' parents, they're setting their son up for ridicule. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I feel like Baby Diggs' parents are setting their son up for ridicule.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I mean.
That seemed like Baby Diggs' video seemed like more it could have been just like a kid with his friends filming that.
Yeah, he doesn't look like he even needs to.
That was more like love of the game.
But there's a new talent ready to depone him.
His name is Baby Diggs, and he said he's ready to humble Baby Gronk anytime he's ready.
It's a parade inside my city, yeah.
This is one of the biggest rivalries we've seen in our lifetime.
It is getting serious.
Baby Diggs has been practicing his precision route running and calling out Baby Gronk saying it's not him.
Baby Gronk, you've been being real silent lately.
So these catches are just going to be for you, little boy.
And he said 1v1, no doubt, little Baby Gronk's getting head tapped.
You think I'm not him? Humble me, little Baby Gronk's getting head tapped.
But Baby Gronk said, if you're so good, put your money where your mouth is.
Baby Diggs isn't worried.
He's enjoying the fame.
Just look at this kid.
He's an athletic freak.
His game does resemble Stefan Diggs.
And Baby Diggs is also an incredible baseball player.
Just look at him strike this kid out with his fastball.
And if you throw him a good pitch, best believe that's getting hit out of the park.
But Baby Gronk stays training against some of the best competition.
Baby Diggs said he doesn't even care. He can't even
take it seriously.
Let us know in the comments
if you're a team Baby Gronk.
Baby Gronk is crossing up disabled dudes.
Oh, this shit's so good.
Whoever edited it is a
genius.
That account put Big Cat and Sass in a highlight package the other day. Oh, this shit's so good. Whoever edited it is a genius. That account put Big Cat and Sass in a highlight package the other day.
Oh, really?
Yeah.
I sent it to the group.
Look at us, Sass.
Yeah.
Now there's rumors that Taylor Swift has her eyes on Baby Gronk coming from this credible source.
Rumors circulating that Taylor Swift rizzed up Baby Gronk.
There's also rumors that Baby Gronk's going to be in bed.
Oh, fuck.
I'm in on Baby Diggs.
Yeah, me too.
I just think about in the future,
Baby Diggs would probably end up working at Barstool
and be like, remember me?
I was Baby Diggs.
14-year-old Steve or whatever?
Yeah.
I might just start DMing people
in behalf of Baby Gronk's dad. Yeah. 14 year old Steve or whatever Yeah I might just start DMing people like
On behalf of
Baby Gronk's dad
Yeah
Like hey do you guys have time to do an interview with Baby Gronk
Just random podcasts
Yeah
Yeah so Kyle I'm sorry that this is all happening to you
People are dunking on his dad in a crazy way
It's kind of fucked up It's. People are dunking on his dad in a crazy way.
It's kind of fucked up.
It's like easy layup lines on his dad.
Yeah, Compton was just destroying him yesterday.
Now LeJuan's about to, it's like, I mean,
people just got to get their own muses.
You know what I mean?
They're taking your muse.
This guy was your muse.
It's also an indisputable fact that Baby Gronk rizzed up Livvy.
So it's like, say what you want.
There's video proof of it.
You say what you want, but have you rizzed her up?
Well, I don't really understand why everyone's so mad about it.
Brandon, if Tommy wanted to make a TikTok and do stuff like that, would you put your foot down?
No, I would probably let him.
I would probably let him.
I'd let him do whatever maybe mr beast maybe
bruce lee kind of yeah he didn't like sports though so he just had him with swords maybe
baby something else yeah he could take anybody it's a nerd thing he could be a baby of he's not
a nerd though he likes like fucking weapons and shit ah he likes maybe steve irwin anime he's a tom yeah okay anime is cool right now though maybe
naruto nerdy baby naruto what's naruto you'd know you'd be a baby version of it be a baby version
of anything what if he was like like one thing him doing it on his own but what if he was like dad i
want you to be like baby grunks they're like I want you to be the voice and the manager.
I want you DMing people.
What does his dad want when he DMs all of these people?
He wants fame through his son.
Does he want his son to do an interview?
Yeah.
He did an interview today.
Has he ever done an interview?
Yeah, he's done a lot of them.
Today?
What does he say in the interview?
I don't know.
I haven't watched.
He just sits there. He's like a robot. He. Today? What does he say in the interview? I don't know. I haven't watched. He just sits there.
He's like a robot.
He's a 10-year-old.
Yeah, he's a 10-year-old who doesn't know what he's doing.
I don't think he's a robot.
I don't think I've ever seen him talk.
No, Dad has made him a robot.
It's mostly just the dad being like, yeah, he eats salmon and brown rice for every meal.
He's been programmed since he was five years old to be the best.
So are these college teams, are they paying him? I don't know why the college teams. I think he's just doing green screen and he's just buying since he was five years old to be the best. So are these college teams, are they paying him?
I think he's just doing green screen, and he's just buying the jersey.
I think he's just DMing, like, he's on the campuses.
He's going to these places.
Yeah, he's going.
I know he went to LSU.
Did he go to West Lafayette, Indiana?
I think he's been to different colleges.
Is he making any money?
Yeah.
Yeah, to get a video.
He's got to be making money.
I think he's making content.
The stacks of money that were in front of him, he probably linked up
with someone to do the video with lots of real money.
Or he DMed Livvy Dunn
linked up to do a video with them.
So it's like creating this little
machine for him.
I don't know. Is he profiting?
I want Baby Gronk to raise up the yak.
He could do it.
But is it like forbidden now to have him on your podcast?
I don't think so.
Nadeau did it today.
What did they say?
What did they say?
Was Nadeau genuinely interviewing Baby Gronk?
I'm sure.
He's like, what do you think about the mafia in Lancaster?
Gotcha moment.
That would be so funny if they just talked about the mafia
the entire time.
Maybe Gronk and Nadeau.
You remind me of a young John Gotti.
Yeah.
Baby Gronk.
How you handle your business
the right way.
The kid who made that video
is a Yak listener?
Oh, the Hoopify, yeah.
He, like, sucks for us,
but we didn't realize
he was mocking everyone.
Yeah. Perfect mark. Oh, he was. Shout out to him perfect oh incredible mock job he was doing an incredible job yeah i didn't know that well good for him
the funniest part about baby gronk's interview today i didn't watch it but i saw a screenshot
of it is it's just in the top right it says presented by canadips which is very clearly
not okay to be interviewing a 10 yearyear-old. 10-year-old, yeah. Plays fast and loose.
It's on to his new life.
He's not just a normal 10-year-old, is the thing.
Oh, he's salmon.
But he's also always like,
but I don't deprive him of doing kid things.
He still eats pizza every now and then.
He's had burgers.
What point are we hypocrites for just building the archive
of people bullying him? Oh, yeah. We're tremendous hypocrites for just building the archive of people bullying him?
Oh, yeah.
We're tremendous hypocrites.
By the worst.
Is that the guy that did the videos?
We're in the yak case right now.
We're the reason that we hate him.
Yeah, no.
We are the worst people ever.
It's the Michael Block.
The worst type of dudes.
Yeah, we are.
When Michael Block finished 15th, he was like the club pro in the PGA Championship.
And by Wednesday, I hated his guts.
And I'm like, but that's my fault.
Because I talked about it and was like,
this is a great story.
Yeah, you made it into a terrible story.
Stop hating on him.
No, KB just farms the internet for things
to be made fun of that haven't been made fun of yet.
Be like, oh, this deserves to be made fun of.
He's great at it.
And then he just makes it mainstream
to be really mean to little kids.
Truly.
Sometimes they're adults, but mentally disabled.
Yeah.
Kyle's defense.
I'm good at justifying it in my head.
Who's next up, bro?
Who are we flaming?
Who are we ruining next?
Bad, bad boy.
Did he DM all of you guys?
Yeah.
No.
Well, that was a shot to my ego.
I actually went looking for the DM, and I never got one.
Really?
That's surprising.
Yeah, I never got one either.
Oh, I had one.
Checked Instagram.
Then I posted a fake DM, and people thought it was real about Mincy getting a DM.
It looked too real.
From Baby Gronk's dad, like like mere hours before the first of the month.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Like, let's link up.
Super viral.
His last act.
Yeah.
Mince will interview Baby Gronk at some point.
Yeah.
By accident, though.
Yeah.
You won't know who Baby Gronk is.
You'll think it's Gronk's kid.
Yeah.
And Nate will be so mad. So, Baby Gronk is. You'll think it's Gronk's kid. Yeah. And Nate will be so mad.
So, Baby Gronk, what do you think about me, Mincy?
It will be in the live chat.
Go fuck yourself.
Fuck you, Mincy.
Oh, we should get a Baby Mincy.
Exploiting his child.
Baby Mincy.
Baby Mincy.
Baby Mincy.
My son doesn't really like to work.
Junior Mincy. Yeah. My son doesn't like to work. Oh, Junior Mincy. Baby Mincy. My son doesn't really like to work. Junior Mince.
Junior Mince.
I'm just picturing Nate wheeling
up and beating the shit out of Mince.
Oh yeah. From his wheelchair
like Murderball. It's not what this company stands for.
Exploiting the youth.
I saw a still photo
of Nate at the Out and About
event just like loving someone's ass.
Is he in a wheelchair?
He was seated.
I was looking at Charlene.
Charlene?
She's one of the most infamous New York City dancers, I guess you could say.
Is she a dancer?
What makes her infamous?
I guess she's just one of the hottest in the circuit I guess you could say
she's like a New York City
you know those characters in New York City
that become kind of staples
she's one of them
like the bouncer outside your spot
oh yeah
Paul's
come on now
this is photoshopped
he's looking at something past her dude This is photoshopped.
He's looking at something past her, dude.
He's loving life.
As he should.
Your beard looks good.
Yeah, it does. That beard's...
Yeah, it's a good pick.
Is that an EKG tattoo or a...
You got the skilet toes on.
Is that the most uncrowded bar in New York City?
You got the buttocks.
The high heel buttocks.
Nice transverse abdominus, too.
Four by eight.
Nice what?
Extension.
Transverse abdominus.
Oh.
The side muscle right there.
You know what I'm talking about, KB.
I don't know what that is.
Yeah, you do.
This person's been in solid core class.
So he just, what happened?
He wheeled up.
See, from my original talks with me
gay dudes really like
naked girls
huh
gay dudes really like
naked girls
and they love
making out with girls too
yeah
they're not gay
and like fucking them
and only them
like I don't know
right
yes
totally
this new show on HBO
called The Idol
has a guy
a character you swear is gay
and then he's just like.
Did you actually watch that?
I watched the first two episodes.
I watched the first.
Is it consumable?
It's so bad.
It's like, so Drake was a producer of, what's the show on HBO that he was a producer of with all the high school kids?
Euphoria.
Euphoria.
Drake was a producer of Euphoria, and so they gave The Weekend a chance to be a producer of the show
And it's just like
Euphoria but like even like
Dirtier and for adults
It was like if a 15 year old was just like
And then like what if the main character
Like eats your pussy
Or lewd at Euphoria
It's just like lewd as hell at all times
It's still a high school like teens
No it's about a woman pop star And so it's just like grown up le hell at all times. It's still a high school, like teens? No, it's about a woman pop star.
And so it's just like grown up lewdness, grown up euphoria.
He's like 50 Shades of Grey and stuff like that.
It's a dirty, dirty show.
Yeah, he's a character.
And he's just like, what if...
Yeah, all kinds of shit.
Did it make headlines?
Because he was like method acting.
So he was living as this character.
And then women on the show were like, yeah, it was pretty weird. Like like the whole apparently it was the whole weird scene who else is in it it was weird
um it's a lot of uh rachel so now she the is she the star she's like the assistant okay yeah she
she's good but she's the one who's getting plowed by the gay dude the seemingly gay dude oh i haven't
seen episode two and then uh and then then there's a bunch of other good Hollywood
actors, like bit actors, fringe actors
around it. Yeah.
I'm not going to watch episode two, but...
It's erotic.
It's weird. It's so weird.
It's uncomfortably weird. The Weeknd is such a bad
actor. Yeah. So
uncomfortably bad. It's almost, yeah,
it's a little bit laughably funny to watch.
Isn't he not the weekend now?
Didn't he just announce
that he's no longer the weekend?
Abel, is he going by his real name?
He's just going back
to his regular self now.
He's done.
Oh, it's so cringy.
What's his name?
I don't know,
but I guess he announced
that he's no longer the weekend.
He's done.
He cannot be the weekend anymore.
Yeah, no, he's the weekend.
Oh, I'm just...
Dan Levy's in it.
Eugene Levy's son.
Oh, dude, it is such a weird show. Eli Roth is in it. What's it Eugene Levy's son Oh dude
It is such a weird show
Eli Roth is in it
What's it on?
Everybody's worst
HBO
It's like the new HBO show
It's not though
It's not gonna get well
It's got a horrible rating
It's gonna get cancelled
After the first season
We'll get on now
Enjoy it
Cause it's a fuck fest Brandon
Nipples
It's a lot of nipples
A lot of nipples
Good nipples or bad nipples?
Show me a bad nipple Oh there's a bad nipple Okay a lot of nipples. A lot of nipples? Good nipples or bad nipples? Show me a bad nipple.
Oh, that's a bad nipple.
Okay.
His paws.
Bad nipples.
No, no, no.
That's great.
But I think that Weekend should have to be ass naked in it too.
If they're making all these ladies get naked, I'm trying to see Weekend's neck.
He deserves some type of...
We've heard about him.
We've heard about him fucking in every single song.
He doesn't even take his shirt off.
Yeah.
He's just doing cocaine and then getting his dick sucked with his shirt on.
Dude, he's supposed to be the coolest dude of all time.
He's getting his dick sucked with his shirt on?
It's so cringy.
He talks all like a vampire.
Talks all slow.
The only cool way for a guy to get his dick sucked with his shirt on
is to do the, where you twist it
and you loop it through the neck
and you pull it down a little.
Yes, you have to do.
He wears like trench coats and shit.
Yeah, and like gloves.
He has a rat tail.
Like a stiff ass rat tail.
And he's like, you don't fuck like a freak, do you?
Prove that you're a freak.
It's so uncomfortable. Yeah, literally. It's so uncomfortable.
It's massively uncomfortable.
She plays him his song
and it's about being a freak
and he's like,
I don't believe you.
Are we going to watch this?
You got to watch it.
You got to watch it.
That's like the climax
of the entire show.
I don't believe you're a freak.
And then she gets on the mic
and moans.
And it's like,
oh, now I know you're a freak. And then she gets on the mic and moans. And it's like, oh, now I know you're a freak.
It's so bad.
It's so bad.
I believe that's what his life is like.
Oh, 100%.
100%.
I'm going to make you a pop star.
Yeah.
Now suck my dick through my button down.
Oh, God, it is rich
He pulls up
He pulls up at like
His like big at her house
It's like a fucking
It's like a private house
So it has one of those
Long ass driveways
And he just pulls up
He walks there I guess
No car
He's just like waiting
At the gate
With like a massive
Like duster on
Blowing in the wind
Is he like writing himself To be the coolest of us Yes Oh he is He is He writes it Waiting at the gate with a massive duster on. Blowing in the wind.
Is he writing himself to be the coolest of us?
Yes, he is.
He writes it and he films it at his own house.
So it's all actually at the weekend's house.
So bad.
I'm surprised if his friends checked him and were like, dude.
Or the director or anybody.
No one checked him.
It's not worth it.
It's going to be like Drake's show, except for more dick sucking.
He's got to show his dick.
He will.
I bet he will.
I bet he's going to commit to be like, I'm an actor.
I go nude.
I don't think he does, because I don't think he likes his body. You could tell he's the type of dude that doesn't like his body.
He's a little bit portly, correct?
He's like the type of dude that no matter how much he worked out, he'd still have a little ripple.
Everyone's wearing bikinis.
It doesn't exist.
I guarantee there's not a single photo of him online.
We're going to get like, did you mean from Google?
Yeah.
Did you mean weekend shirted?
Yeah.
Weekend shirts?
Everyone's shirtless.
Everyone's wearing bikinis and shit.
He's legitimately wearing a shirt.
I kind of like that move. He's making a show where you never have to take your shirt off. Is he shirtless Like everyone's wearing Like bikinis and shit And he's wearing a He's legitimately wearing I kind of like that move
He's making a show
Where you never have
To take your shirt off
Is he shirtless online
No this first one
That pops up
Is just a photoshop
I just googled
The weekend shirtless
It's just a photoshop
Of him with enormous
I don't know how to
It might be him
Yeah
There you go
Oh
But the other ones
That shit is not it
That shit
It cannot be real
That looks so fake.
That ain't him.
That ain't him.
Those ass makes these pictures.
So fake.
He's ripped.
Are those real?
No.
But what?
God, no.
Oh, there it is.
That one's real.
That one looks real.
That's what ladies like.
That's a sturdy man.
Yeah, it has to be him.
That's Tom Cruise's son, Connor.
Oh, that's it.
That's what Tom Cruise's
son looks like? Did you see the picture of
Robert De Niro going to see Transformers
with his son? No.
How old is his son?
22. Oh, I forgot about his
new son. Oh, yeah.
Not his new son.
Even Drizzy pops the top on occasion.
That's a really funny sentence.
Even Drizzy pops the top on occasion.
Love how those Drake shirtless pictures are on Pinterest.
Is that just for middle-aged moms?
What did I stumble across?
I'm going to re-pin this.
I'm going to pin this to my board.
Sash, we might have to make a ring light TikTok.
Have you noticed that The Weeknd never takes his shirt off?
I'm out of that game.
Even Drizzy pops his top on a game.
You do to.
You do it.
I'll do it.
I can't.
All right, big cat, big cat.
All right, big cat, do it.
Connor's working on a few that I just taped.
Really?
Where's the ring light?
Do we know where the ring light is? You saw how mine did so many numbers.
Right there.
Mine did big numbers.
Connor, bring out that ring light.
Heard it was your most viewed TikTok.
Yeah, yours did huge numbers.
Have you noticed that The Week weekend never pops his top?
You might have to do it, Rowan.
I'll just put it on my TikTok.
No, I can't.
Yeah, but you just pop his top twice.
Why do you say that?
Okay, all right.
You've been driven to pop his top.
You've got to do it, Big Cat.
Okay, all right.
Because this is going to be a gateway drug into you.
Every show will find something for you to do.
Do we have a ring light just for this?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And it's way too big.
You've got a couple other ring lights. and it's way too big it's so bright
it's so fucking bright it really is oh here's the new one that i just wait give a one star
review and say it's just too bright you guys want to watch the one i just did yeah yes
just said it's you tj it's a big a big cat. I haven't watched it.
I don't know how it's going to come out.
That's not how a tripod is supposed to work, is it?
Yeah, what are the legs?
The legs are going up.
These double-jointed tripods.
That's too...
Oh, that's good.
Then lower the middle one. These double-jointed tripods. That's too... Now that's good.
Then lower the middle one.
There's... Down, down, down one more.
Yeah, and then unclip that and let it slide down.
There we go.
Looking good.
Fucking producer.
Bring it over here.
We're going to.
Have you noticed that the weekend never pops his top?
It's true.
Like something.
Someone scoured the Internet.
There has to be like a middle fact.
When you search weekend shirtless, there are no Bing results.
Yeah. When you search weekend shirtless there are no bing results and yeah when you search weekend shirtless there are no bing results yeah even drizzy videos but shirtless
would be a good i'm gonna do that i'm gonna take off my shirt yeah yeah play the one that i i just
sent you tj i got connor editing these now i'm gonna go fucking dummy viral. Update on Elon Musk's Twitter.
They've added a new feature called bookmarks.
So if you see a thread or a tweet that you want to come back to later,
you just press the bookmark and then you can find it through your profile.
This is really cool, guys.
Sound off in the comments.
This is really cool.
Update.
It's really cool. You like the bookmarks?
Yeah.
That's so good. It a really heads doing that shit your age too has the yak fan guy always done videos like that?
Is that how he's...
Or is he, like...
Is he just claiming he was doing that sarcastically?
I don't think so.
Okay.
Claim anything.
All right.
Did you know that the...
We can edit it.
We can edit it.
So I'm going to do the first part being, like,
the weekend never takes the top off, and then I'm going to take my first part being like the weekend never takes the top off
and then I'm going to take my top off for the second part.
So is it three parts?
Two parts.
Can you turn the ring light?
Should be as bright as possible.
Where do you turn it on at?
The clicker or some shit?
Fuck man.
Brandon, you're at the new house. Did you
take the boat out?
No, I sat in the boat for a second, but
the kids weren't there, so I didn't want to go without them.
You do have a boat? I have a boat. Yeah, I bought a boat.
Did you go out there?
I went out to the house.
No, but I'm saying, did you go out on the lake?
It's right by the pier, so I just kind of got into it.
Is there a bunch of houses on this lake?
Yeah.
Did you meet any of the people?
Do you have neighbors?
How close?
I haven't met them yet.
I'm going to meet them soon.
Is there, like, recreation on the lake or just private property?
It's not electric.
It's electric motors on the lake.
It's a 90-acre lake, but it's...
Jesus.
Good for you.
90 acres.
Yeah. I'm excited. It's 10 90 acre lake. Jesus. Good for you. 90 acres. I'm excited.
10 less than Winnie the Pooh.
You gotta get one of those big
water pads that everyone can hang
out on. Think about that.
Maybe a trampoline out there.
You guys? Yeah.
Alright, here we go.
Update in the entertainment world.
People are starting to catch on that The Weeknd never taught...
Fuck.
Look how bright your face is.
Look how bright your face is on the fucking...
Look like a jabberwocky.
Pops his top.
Pops his top.
Update in the entertainment world, people are starting to catch on that the Weeknd famous rapper never pops his top off.
If you Bing it or Google it, you'll never find a picture with his pop topped off.
Close, close.
Hold on.
Even Drizzy the Drake pops his top off from time to time.
What do you think about the Weeknd not popping his top off?
Sound off in the comments.
Yep.
What does sound off in the comments mean?
You might have said topping his pop off at one point.
That's okay.
All right.
Artisan.
First of all, big pause.
If you mess up on purpose, that gives the people in the comments something to talk about,
which feeds the algorithm.
That's a tactic.
I feel like you're on this thing all the time.
I fell for it.
Fin de semana no tiene.
Is.
Fuck.
Tiena que.
Fuck.
I've been watching this guy draft movies, and every once in a while he'll just pull an onion
up and take a bite of an onion mid-draft.
It gets everybody going.
Yeah.
Fuck yeah, that's about to go viral as hell.
I'm about to own TikTok.
Thank you, Che.
The ring light does crazy things for your eyes, though, brother.
They really pop.
Oh, sorry.
Whose pen is that on the ground?
That's mine.
One of these? Best pens.
Really? A little thick.
I like the Muge.38s.
I like the Pilot 07.
These are so
crisp and bold.
You gotta get a Muge.
These are the best.
.38, dude.
The Uniball Vision.
Are you out of pens.
What is that, 0.75?
Are you out of pens?
Yeah, I'm out of pens.
Niko, get pens.
It's very hard to find a pen here.
I've got like 100 of these.
Well, now I can't find anything.
Very hard.
They're making us not have anything on our desk.
Today's the final day to pack up your shit or it's gone.
I thought it just meant make everything neat.
No.
I didn't know it meant take everything off your desk or we will throw it away.
Right.
It's got to be, your desk has to be like completely empty.
I have a box full of starting lineup figures now.
Why does it have to be completely empty?
They're getting rid of all the desks, I think.
Except for your assess.
They need to keep Frank the Tank's desk, actually.
Yes.
They need to preserve it like the stairway under World Trade Center.
I was saying that my desk right now, with everyone cleaning up, I'm basically in the 50s when we built all the highways.
I'm the woman sitting on her porch with a shotgun.
I'm not moving.
It's a tiny ass little house and they built fucking skyscrapers.
Live event Lisa's pulling Eminent Domain though.
She's coming down on everybody.
He's rent controlled.
She keeps telling me I'm fine until I move because I was like, I'm going to move it in a month.
Let me just live in this for a month.
They're cracking the whip out there.
Things are changing around here.
By the way, we have an update.
We had an update on the Chicago office.
Pete was so excited with the progress that he told me not once but twice
he repeated himself in the course of Thursday,
which is very unlike Pete.
He was smiling.
Oh, yeah.
It looks awesome.
Just from the picture behind him, it looks like it's going to be him smiling.
Made me want the whole building to collapse.
Yeah.
It's not worth it.
Was it you said he giggled?
Oh, he was like giddy like a schoolgirl.
Oh, before our first date.
Like he was like shaking with excitement.
He was like jacked up with excitement.
He is so detestable.
Is he moving out there?
Is he excited because he knows we're supposed to?
Something might be on time.
That's why he's excited.
He's just like so much planning goes into it, and now you get to see it in person.
I'm like just fired up with the progress being made.
He was like, right this second, they're putting up walls to studios right now.
He was that enthusiastic.
I don't like that.
He was also drinking high noons this weekend.
I watched it happen with my own eyes.
I couldn't believe it.
Everybody was actually having high noons at the show.
Flavors.
I mean, the tequilas were flying off the shelves, and I found it hard to get the lime tequilas
because everybody was grabbing them up so much,
but that kind of made me pivot to some of the other flavors that they have,
and the strawberry, of course, I know is fantastic,
but I also got to have a little bit of the passion fruit.
The passion fruit is actually a very tasty treat for a high noon,
but everybody was enjoying them.
I think it's because they taste so good.
I think it's because they don't have malt. I think it's because they taste so good. I think it's because they don't have malt.
I think it's because you know what you're going to get.
You know how you're going to feel.
Great.
And you know that you're going to get something that's super flavorful
and even keel, 100 calories across the board every single time.
It's going to be tasty, and you're really going to enjoy it.
There's also a grapefruit flavor.
Let's not sleep on the grapefruit sass, okay?
Yeah, love it. Yeah, I know you do. And I know you. Let's not sleep on the grapefruit sass, okay? Yeah, love it.
Yeah, I know you do.
And I know you're not going to sleep on it.
You like to cook yourself a dinner, be buzzing around the kitchen,
and then in your left hand the whole time a can of High Noon.
Totally.
Splash a little bit on the chicken cacciatore, give it a little bit of extra flavor.
Totally.
I know you do.
I know you love it because I do too.
High Noon tequila seltzer is great for the outdoors, great for the indoors,
great on your shelves, and great in your belly look for them on drizzly or at your local convenience or liquor store or visit highnoonsbeers.com to find some sweet sweet
high noons near you man is that stuff good the best damn good ron and i walked after trivia we
walked into a bar in wrigleyville and we we got into the bar, and all of a sudden
we heard over the loudspeaker, a guy's like, pencils down.
We'd walked into a trivia night.
We're like, what the fuck?
You guys knew exactly what you were doing.
We're like, we got to get out of here.
Everybody's looking up from their pages being like, big cut.
That's what a bar trivia patron sounds like.
Big cut.
Beaker from the Muppets.
Not a neckbeard, but I liked it.
It seemed like everybody had the best time in Chicago in general, though.
Everybody seemed like it was a good weekend.
Everybody had fun.
Not Brandon.
Well, okay.
Except for Brandon.
Brandon had a terrible, terrible time.
He had a nice time alone.
Worst night of your life.
Two hours away.
Beautiful city. You got to go see the mansion that you're living in. Stunning city. You had a nice time alone. Worst night of your life. Two hours away. Beautiful city.
You got to go see the mansion that you're living in.
Stunning city.
You're living on a lake.
Yeah, I am.
Like a pontoon boat.
Got a boat.
There goes Rico.
He's got his trophy with him.
Just walking around like that all day?
Yeah.
You wet a line?
No, I did not.
Damn, why not?
I told my 10-year-old I wouldn't do it without him.
You lie. Yeah, you're keeping a lot of weird, I did not. Damn. Why not? I told my 10-year-old I wouldn't do it without him. You lie.
Yeah, you're keeping a lot of weird promises.
That's not weird.
It's fish.
I'm with Brandon.
You're going to catch all the fish in the lake?
I'm excited to take my kid out there and do it with him.
I want to catch the first one.
Yeah.
With your boy.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
They stalk that thing?
Huh?
They stalk that thing?
Yeah.
Yeah.
And it is boys.
I'm going to go fishing this weekend. Your old love's crazy. They stalk that thing? Huh? They stalk that thing? Yeah. Yeah. Brandon and his boys. I'm going to go fishing this weekend.
Your old love's fishing.
Where can I fish if I wanted to today?
I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know where you can fish in New York.
I'm going to-
Central Park.
I'm going to Ontario, California this weekend.
Brandon and his boys.
You know, that's where one of the last Rainforest Cafes is.
Oh, really?
One of the last 18.
Is there an airport there?
I don't know.
Is 18-
18's too many to say one of the last, right? I mean, it? One of the last 18. Is there an airport there? I don't know. Is 18... 18's too many
to say one of the last, right?
I mean, it's one of the last.
You gotta get under single digits. That's mathematically
one of the last 18.
There's three Kmart's left.
Did you say it? I'm one of the last Barstow employees.
Yeah.
You are. There's three Kmart's left.
One's in New Jersey. That's good.
There's a bunch in Australia, though. Isn't there one in New York? Is there? Maybe it closed. There was a K-Mart slips. One's in New Jersey. That's good. There's a bunch in Australia, though.
Isn't there one in New York?
Is there?
Maybe it closed.
There was a K-Mart when I first moved here.
A few years ago.
I went to it.
I swear it's closed.
Yeah, a long time ago.
Stores just be going out of business.
Amazon.
Nah, they're killing it.
They're doing fine.
You're going to catch the first fish with your boys?
Yeah.
I'm going to catch big fish this weekend.
That's great, Sass.
Don't fucking hate on that. Why are you hating on that? I'm not. I'm going to catch big fish this weekend. That's great, Sass. Don't fucking hate on that.
Why are you hating on that?
I'm not.
I'm just like a
fisher like me.
I wouldn't be able to resist.
You wouldn't be able
to lie to my child.
You weren't allowed
to have any fun
this weekend then.
No, but I didn't have time.
I just went up there
the first night
and it's 55 miles
from the office
so it's a long way.
It's a nice time
to decompress.
Yeah, I'm going to have to. Yeah, a lot to think about. Luckily I'll have the commute. Stay at mine. So it's a long way. It's a nice time to decompress. Yeah, I'm going to have to.
Luckily, I'll have the commute.
Stay at mine.
So it's a long way up there.
You're going to be getting hotels so often.
No, I'm not.
How long is it now?
How long is the commute now?
An hour.
It's just different.
It should be different.
I look forward to it.
I'm excited about it.
I'm so happy because I know there's a point in that drive.
I drove it.
There's a point in that drive where the lights kind of go away
and you're on a two-lane road and it's just dark.
I love that.
Love that.
You listen to some tunes?
Yeah, and you're not in a city anymore.
You're actually headed towards a small town.
I love that.
Yeah, that's nice.
I think I'm going to pass around a hat, have everybody try and pitch in.
We'll try and get you a Tesla so you won't have to think about your commute.
Oh, you should get a Tesla.
You'll be able to just kick back and just let it glide. I can't tell my family back home in Mississippi I you a Tesla so you won't have to think about your commute. Oh, you should get a Tesla. You'll be able to just kick back and just let it glide.
I can't tell my family back home in Mississippi I bought a Tesla.
You don't tell them then.
I can't.
Plus, if we buy it for you.
I can't tell Uncle Donnie I got a Tesla.
He already thinks I'm voting for Biden.
He thinks I'm working on the Biden campaign now.
Sass, how much would you pledge to his Tesla?
$0.
Not even $5?
Not even $5?
Maybe $5. Okay, there you go. So there we go. We start five dollars? A five dollar donation? Maybe five.
Okay, there you go.
There we go.
We start something.
How much are you at?
I'll pledge 55.
So it's $60.
$60 towards a Tesla.
I'll go 60 grand.
Holy shit.
Fuck.
I'll double.
Damn, Nick.
What if you get a fleet of Teslas?
Can you give him 60 grand?
Yeah.
That's a lot of money, dude.
I had some relatives die.
That's awesome.
It's clutch.
All right.
Speaking of fishing, Nick, I got you a gift.
What?
Oh, it's that time of year again.
That time of year.
Thank you, TJ.
Where is it?
Is it in that box?
It's right next to you.
Uh-uh.
Other side.
Camera trickery.
Oh.
What the hell?
Fuck yes.
Oh, my goodness.
A what brimmed hat?
So, TJ got me a very long brimmed hat.
Yep.
And then he followed it up with a very short brimmed hat.
What's left? Regular brim. Brimless. It is regular brimmed hat. Yep. And then he followed it up with a very short brimmed hat. What's left?
Regular brim? Brimless?
It is regular brim. Wide? I think I know the hat.
Oh.
Ah!
You're the best.
Women fear...
We gotta read the whole thing.
I actually look pretty good in this.
Women fear me. Fish fear me.
Men turn their eyes away from me as I walk.
No beast dare make a sound in my presence.
I am all alone on this barren earth.
I have the perfect hat.
Solid hat.
You have the best collection now.
I have a really good collection.
That's a solid brim.
Joey Kamasta stole my short brim one.
He looked good in it, though.
Do you want to do a ring light video for Big Cat's TikTok, maybe?
Do you think there's anyone who like that hat fits them perfectly?
Maybe Beavis or Butthead.
Yeah.
Speaking of gifts.
George Simpson.
TJ, who does Mark Titus think he is?
What happened?
He bought me a Nintendo Switch.
He bought TJ a Nintendo Switch.
TJ, you want another one?
I owe you.
Sure.
All right, I'll get you a Nintendo Switch.
Nice.
I'll get you a milkshake.
Strawberry.
Quigs drink it. Yeah. Maybe if we all pitch in, we could also get TJ you a Nintendo Switch. Nice. Strawberry. Quigs drink it.
Yeah.
Maybe if we all pitch in, we could also get TJ a third Nintendo Switch.
If we all pledge a little bit of cash.
Show 60 grand.
Why are you putting your headphones on over there?
It looks normal.
That makes you look perfectly fine.
You look like a train conductor with it like that.
I think it looks good.
You gotta put them under the hat.
Headphones, then hat. I actually it looks good. You got to put them under the hat. Headphones, then hat.
Actually, I fuck with it.
Shit.
You kind of look like Baby Diggs.
Yeah, you do.
It is a Baby Diggs look.
Old stovepipe hat.
It kind of looks like something the Weeknd would wear in the Idol.
He gets his dick stuck.
I'm going to fuck you with my hat.
You think my big-ass hat could fit in your pussy?
He's just fisting her.
Are you not a real freak?
There's like a confusing scene in the second episode
where you don't even know what happens.
Everybody's kind of laying around like it's a nightclub on Tatooine,
like languishing all all on the ground,
and then someone's just standing up,
like getting shocked,
and the weekend has a buzzer.
I don't know if he has a fucking shock collar on him
or if he has an anal plug that's buzzing
or some shit like that,
but they don't even explain.
Does it imply that they had like a...
I'm going to go home and watch this.
They had to watch it right away
because they don't even
contextualize the scene
they just cut to that scene
and it's happening
and they like
cinematically pan through it
and then just jump away
oh of course
you know what the
the cantina band
on Tatooine
you know what genre
that is called
George Lucas said
it's called jizz
no it's not
was he making a goof
space jazz dude jizz so it's not. Was he making a goof? Space jazz, dude.
So it's canon.
DJ, thank you so much, man.
Great hat.
It took six weeks to ship.
I will need you to do a TikTok in that hat.
Of course.
I don't want the top of the hat to be shown.
Why do women fear you?
I think
the original one is like, women love me,
fish fear me.
Women
fear me.
Maybe you don't wear that one in public.
Women fear me is kind of rough.
He's a domestic abuser. I didn't even think about that.
I assault women, fish fear me.
I'll hit them. I'll hit them.
I'll hit you.
Women are really scared of me.
That's a hat. Just get that on it.
So the whole thing is...
Don't ask.
Remember those shirts
that were like, cool story, bro?
Yeah. That was the whole shirt.
Don't talk shit on that.
Don't talk shit on that phrase. Don't talk shit on that phrase.
I had a monopoly on phrases.
I think I had one that was like, do you have a sister?
Oh, that's a good one.
Yeah, wear that hat with a shirt that says, don't ask about the hat.
And you just have 20 of those shirts and you wear them every day.
Don't ask about the hat, especially.
Make me a sandwich, holy shit.
I might have to cop one of those.
I want a really big hat that says my shirt's down here
and the shirt's just like, don't ask about the hat.
Just sending their eyes back and forth.
That'd be a nice set to sell.
You guys should sell that as a set for anus.
It would kind of play?
They'd probably sell a shirt like that At that gift shop up on 7th
Oh yeah
The one that says fuck you you fucking fuck
They have like a whole stack
Do I look like a fucking people person?
Dude I want the one that just looks like the coke logo
But it just says cock
I want it so bad
So we had a murder here the other day
Wait what?
In the office? A crosswalk.
That murder was here? That was the bus?
It was right here. The bus?
No, the stabbing.
The bus was wild.
What was the bus? One at a time.
One at a time.
The bus was...
Elon's Twitter goes off.
What was the bus? It was literally just a person
that had been dragged by a city bus
for what looks like half a block
and the guts were everywhere.
Guts?
The person's dead body was underneath the tires.
Yeah, one of my buddies was telling me about that
for like 30 minutes.
And then a woman just like you could have
it almost looks scripted.
A woman walked through the dead person's guts
just staring at her phone,
like crossing the street.
What the fuck?
It's like that's probably how that person died.
But, yeah, what happened with the stabbing?
We had a stabbing.
There was a fight right there.
Look.
Oh!
Oh!
Wait, is that the?
That's our crosswalk.
That's right.
I can deal with blood.
That was the guts.
No guts.
Don't put guts on Twitter.
What happened?
That was Zah. I saw. No guts. Don't put guts on Twitter. What happened? That was Zah.
You tweeted guts?
Zah tweeted guts.
That's blood.
I thought it was guts.
Who put the guts on Twitter? Elon.
Elon did.
That's allowed.
You can watch.
I've seen enough people die on Twitter in the last week. I couldn't open Twitter. I don't want the bus video. I've seen enough people die on Twitter in the last week.
I couldn't open Twitter last week without that Egyptian guy getting eaten by the shark.
Oh, my God, dude.
I saw that video.
Just another one?
Yes, dude.
I did not want to see that.
And they're like, oh, he's going for the remains now.
Now, yeah, he got the remains.
And then there's the video of them catching the shark and opening the shark.
I'd much rather watch the video that someone tweeted at a lot of us today of a guy squatting.
Is it a full fallout?
No, like it was an Asian dude squatting and he's just dipping his dick into a woman's mouth.
And they're like, what's Stephen Jay doing?
I've seen that one.
That one.
I'd rather watch that one.
That's funny.
That's funny.
That's fun.
I'm not trying to watch someone.
Sex. Yes. Sex and weightlifting. That's funny. That's funny. That's fun. I'm not trying to watch someone. Sex, yes.
Sex and weightlifting.
That's a free weekend would love.
That should be it.
That's the only way he works out.
I want to star in a gym comedy.
A fitness, like a gym comedy.
You could be a good, like what?
Gym sitcom?
You Marky Mark in The Rock.
That would be fun.
What was that?
What was that, Jim?
You Joey Swole.
Gain?
Ain't No Pain No Gain.
Was that a comedy?
Kind of, yeah.
Like a comedy class?
Like you host a jazzercise class, but I go in and you're funny?
That's what they already are like.
You're talking about a sitcom like...
Yeah, it just takes place in a gym.
Like Dodgeball.
You have to save a gym.
It's just got to be a gym comedy.
Fuck, there should be.
I want to find this bus video.
The stabbing happened at Pava Pizza.
I want you guys to deal with what I saw.
It happened so bad.
It happened at 8 o'clock Friday morning.
Just two guys, I guess they got in a fight in the crosswalk.
They didn't know each other.
They were fist fighting, but one of them had
a knife. He won.
So the homeless guy had the knife.
Homeless guy had the knife and it was the corner of
29th and 7th.
Right there by the cop.
He shouldn't have did that, man. I'll stand up and say it.
That guy shouldn't have stabbed that guy.
It's a spicy town. I don't know the details.
So I'm not going to commit one way or the other.
I'm anti-stab.
Brandon needs to do his research first.
I'll check into it.
I don't know what was said.
Who knows?
What's their background?
Were they ever arrested before?
Yeah.
I got to do my research before I decide if this stabbing was just or not.
You need to know the Pantone brand.
There's video of it.
Well, the actual thing is that the guy that stabbed him had some priors elsewhere,
and the guy that got stabbed and unfortunately died, he was wanted on a murder warrant somewhere else.
Yeah, I heard something like that.
What?
Oh, so they're kind of just –
Right.
So it was like a Dexter situation.
Yeah, I was taking it out of the justice system.
It was a really bad Dexter.
It was like a round-robin tournament.
Call a cat and tic-tac-toe.
But that's kind of nice to not put the pressure on.
KB, what are you doing?
Stomach issues.
What's wrong?
Gas, stomach pain.
I'm eating too healthy.
Too healthy?
Like baby grunk.
Started my diet today.
Did you?
Yeah.
Sass?
How's the no boozing?
It's going well.
Saturday was rough.
Saturday was tough.
But I feel good
why are you quitting boozing
at that age
you know you get to that age
because
dude what
I'm not capable
of having one beer
and then stopping
yeah you're 22
yeah but everyone says that
it's not
but I have stuff to do
and like I'll be like
three days a week.
A40, you're going to have the most fun ever touring the country and performing stand-up.
Yeah.
I don't know.
I, like, I went home from my sister's graduation, and I had 20 beers.
My parents were, like, shocked.
And then I woke up the next morning, and my mom was like, did people come over last night?
And I was like, no, I drank all of those by myself.
And then I was like, all right, I'm not going to drink for a week.
And then I blacked out on Wednesday.
So you're only three days into it.
Until like 5 a.m.
Yeah.
Three days into it.
But it's just like, I'm not going fully sober.
I don't think I'm capable of having one beer and then stopping.
Because if we had a high noon right now, I'd be out until 4 a.m.
Okay.
I'm sorry to laugh.
Yeah, I mean, it's like not.
I'm just more jealous like if I could be 22 again and not be hungover, like you're wasting it.
But I do get hungover.
I'm mad at you.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, it's just a personal preference.
And I do get hungover.
I'm going to come to your show on Wednesday, though.
If anyone intervenes on you, just let me know because I will be on the other side.
I'll come and back you up and be like, it's not a problem.
I don't know.
I don't think it's a problem.
If anyone wants to come to Sass's show, I'm going to get drunk in front of him and be the devil on his shoulder.
Empt him up.
See if he's really got the resolve.
I respect checking yourself.
I'll give it in.
Yeah.
I just don't like when people get old
young
yeah I mean but it doesn't have anything to do with that
it's more just I drink too much
like I drink
I drink too much
Dave Matthews had the same problem bro
I drink too much
I don't think it's really an age thing as much as it is a
because that was also a thing too for a while
I was like well I'd be in college right now so who a while. I was like, well, I'd be in college right now, so who cares?
Right.
But then I'm also like, well, no, I'm not in college, and this is my life, and I'm making
habits for my entire life.
Well, no, you'd be summer after college.
Yeah, but...
That's a pretty good summer.
But what I'm doing right now is something I'm going to be doing for a very long time,
so I can't be in the habit of like, oh, I have four shows at the stand tonight, time
to black out.
Okay.
Save it for special occasions. It's fair. I Time to black out. Okay. Save it for a special occasion.
I respect the hell out of that.
Respect it.
But we should get a case race going or something like that,
all of us drinking together or something.
So you save yourself up for something like that.
We unleash you out the fucking gates like Pamplona.
Yeah.
Yeah, I'll let you guys know.
Get 30 days and then I'm back on.
Once you get to day 30,
you're going to crave day 100 more than anything.
Yeah, yeah.
You're not even going to want it.
How far did you go, KB?
Uh-oh.
I'm on day 45.
What's your longest?
Oh, you're not drinking right now?
No booze, no Adderall, no uppers, no nicotine.
There's lots of weed.
Yeah.
You gave up on music.
Weed is, oh, yeah, no, I'm back on music.
I relapsed on my favorite songs.
I'm listening to my favorite songs again.
It's awesome.
Why would you give up music anyway?
I gave up controlling what music I listen to.
It kind of worked.
You guys should try it.
Cold shower?
Every day.
It feels like nothing.
I'll daydream in there.
It'll be six minutes.
It gets so much easier easier Do you get bored?
Because I was like
Yeah
But then I'm trying to build up
A tolerance for boredom
And it's kind of working
I'm not sure of that
You guys
That was my problem
I was so addicted to the smartphone
Why do you work on so much stuff?
What?
Why do you work on so much stuff?
The better you get
The healthier you get
The more you want to do these things.
But I think it's a horseshoe theory where you're turning into unhealthy.
Well, for the sake of podcasts and entertainment, I'm going to take it a little too far when I talk about it.
But I'm wonderful.
But is it making life more enjoyable?
Are you like, I'm truly enjoying life more right now?
Or is it like I got a lot of-
I don't have the highs that I used to, but I'm hovering at a good spot okay that's a good thing yes consistency let's fucking go bro
yeah i don't know i mean like yesterday i wasn't it was the first sunday i haven't been
brutally hung over in a while that's gotta feel good yeah but then i was just like
i just watched i had more time to watch terrible movies the entire day.
I still didn't do anything.
You're not using your new free time for anything productive.
Yeah.
What time do you wake up in the morning, Kyle?
I felt better.
That's my issue.
I sleep like shit because I smoke weed.
It's not an issue.
I'm waking up at like 5.30 to 6.
Jesus. that's crazy
what would it be you
look at you
7 but I don't
that's not by choice
like if I could
I would still sleep
what time do you go to bed
Kyle
too early
like 9.30
see I go to bed
at like midnight
I can't
like that's my thing
is I
I'll go back to where I used to be I'm having fun with it yeah no I like if you're doing like that's my thing is I, my sleep schedule is so fucked. I'll go back to
where I used to be.
No, no, no.
I'm having fun with it.
Yeah, no, I like,
if you're doing well,
that's all the-
It'll get boring soon,
but I'm enjoying it.
I don't go to bed
until like four
every night.
Because you're so drunk?
Video games.
It's like,
it's a combination of
that's when I would go to bed
if I was going out
and a combination of
now I'm not drunk
so I can't sleep.
Do you still have
the feeling of like, because I still have it where I don't want to go to bed just because like.
You don't want more day left.
Yeah, you don't want the day to be over.
Yeah.
I have that feeling and it's such an insane thing to think about.
Yeah.
I do that all the time.
Yeah.
I want some time.
Yeah.
I did that on Saturday night.
I was like, I should have gone to bed at like 10 and I was like, I didn't go to bed at like 1230s.
Having fun just doing nothing
I watched this movie last night
have you guys ever seen The Switch
with
Jason Bateman and
Jennifer Aniston
does he switch up his cum or something
one of the most bizarre
like
unintentionally insane
movies I've ever seen in my entire life.
I don't understand how that was okay.
The movie was okay to me.
You got to tell us.
They switched cum?
It is.
And Jennifer Aniston and Jason Bateman are best friends in the movie.
And she decides, she's like, I'm at an age, I want to have a baby.
I'm going to get a sperm donor.
She picks her sperm donor.
She has a party for the whole thing.
It's insane.
The dude like comes into the container and then it's like in the bathroom.
And Jason Bateman is like her best friend and he's like hammered, blacked out, goes into the bathroom, knocks it over.
It comes everywhere.
He decides to put his own cum in it.
And then seven years later he finds
out that it's his kid and he's like i hijacked your pregnancy that's kind of like it's like
the doctor in indiana oh it's so crazy and then i was like i was like there has to be like three
hours left in this movie i pressed like pause there's 10 minutes left and i'm like what could
possibly happen here and then he
like she's like don't ever talk to me or my family again and then like a week later she's like
we need you in our life like i'm probably gonna end up marrying you i was like dude in what
scenario does this guy not end up in like prison like that like she was like i don't want your baby
and then he like on like without telling her, gives her his baby.
And then they're like, but we're so in love now.
Like, what the fuck is this?
Like, it would have been a big problem to ask that other guy to come again.
You can't ask him to come again.
He's already came.
Yeah.
I was like, what the hell?
And then it just ends with them, like, being in love and getting married. How old was this? Like, this was, like, I think the movie's, like, what the hell? And it just ends with them being in love and getting married.
What year was this?
I think the movie's like 15 years old.
I don't want to watch it.
Yeah, 2010.
From the people who brought you to Indiana.
And then the doctor in Indiana did it.
Yeah.
Remind me what that is.
That was the guy who worked.
It was a small town in Indiana where he was a,
he was whatever doctor, like a.
Fertility.
Fertility doctor.
And he was just using his own cum for all of these pregnancies.
Yeah.
500 of them.
Everyone, 23 and me came around.
All these people tried to look up who they're like related to.
And everyone in the town was like basically related to each other.
And then there was this guy.
Was he like a motive outside of. No, they never really. He died before. Oh, he was. basically related to each other. And then there was this terrible- Was he like a motive outside of-
No, they never really-
He died before.
Oh, he was, there was some like dark,
he was in some dark, weird like branch
of like Christianity, right?
Where like the best thing you can do is have like-
Is multiply.
50 offspring.
Yeah.
They thought maybe it was that.
Oh.
Crazy though.
But he died before.
And imagine if they just formed a romance movie around that.
It's also the guy, like the husbands would think that it was their child, but it was this doctor's child.
Yeah.
Oh, my God.
And then these kids are all growing up in the same town, like dating each other.
Yeah.
Well, how good was the town's football team?
If the town's football team was like incredible, it's kind of worth it.
It's true.
What little hijinks are you doing over there brandon what are you getting nick doing on the yak house
but he's trying to add an above ground swimming pool and he just can't figure it out above ground
swimming pool and i don't know how to do it i don't know how to best do it circle yeah but
where is it going to be at have some depth and where would i put it there's a tree right there
maybe in the side yard i don't know the neighbor's too close could
you draw a bouncy castle no yeah like a rental like a rental because what else would go on the
front lawn michael scott shirt his date mike nice to meet me all right there has to be some sort of
crime though right yes yeah i would think so. Yeah.
And then he's like, I told her.
And his buddy's like, you did the right thing, man.
He's a hero.
Yeah.
You did the right thing, yeah.
And then he goes back to being like, woe is me at his job.
And like, oh, the world's out to get me.
And then she turns it around and she's like, actually, I'm in love with you.
What the hell?
About the dude being a hero?
Oh, 100%.
100%.
It's crazy because even if you knocked over the cummy container of the original sperm donor,
it wouldn't completely empty.
I mean, I can't imagine you need that much.
So why is she just keeping the cum out like that?
It was just like on the bathroom sink.
Yeah, that's a wild move at the party.
I'm sorry.
When you go to the bathroom, I got a jar of cum.
Cooling like a pie on the bathroom sink. Yeah, that's a wild move at the party. I'm sorry. When you go to the bathroom, I got a jar of coffee. Cooling like a pie on the windowsill.
Also kind of just glossing over why they had a party for them to do this.
Oh, he jizzed at the party.
Jizzed at the party.
Yeah, I guess you have to.
They were like, it's time.
And they were all clinking their glasses and shit.
Oh, my God.
What a freakish movie.
What a freak.
I feel good to come like that, though.
I want to watch it.
The cover, the poster looks like the safest
movie of all time. Dude, the
description
of the movie was like,
two best friends' relationship
changes entirely when one of them
gets pregnant. Jesus.
We gotta watch this on Recrochables.
Yeah. How's Recrochables
going? It's going alright. I quit.
What?
What?
Actually?
I had to tell him today I can't do it no more.
Quit today?
No.
Well, I'm moving to Chicago.
He's just going to have to use other people to do it from now on.
You guys can't do it on Zoom. You knew you were going to move to Chicago when you started it. I know. I knew I was going to have to use other people to do it from now on. You guys can't do it on Zoom.
You knew you were going to move to Chicago when you started it.
I know.
How did he take it?
He's cool with it.
He's cool.
We're recording one today.
We're doing Air and Jerry Maguire today.
Wait, which ones?
Oh, you don't do bad ones.
Oh, we just do.
We pair them up now.
We pair them up.
That's a good battle, huh, Steve?
That's a hell of a battle.
Yeah, I mean, one of them's a great movie.
They're both great movies.
They're both great movies.
Air's a great movie.
Steve and I saw Nitro got a couple orders in this week.
Oh, yeah.
It's so fucking funny.
I did.
Jerry was, like, blown away.
Me and him in a Taco Bell.
We were actually, at the time, the only people in there.
And he was flabbergasted that I did that.
But it makes sense.
What are y'all talking about?
How Steven, when he orders stuff, will leave the name Nitro.
That's what he is on my phone, Nitro Z.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, it's just like the hot dog place that I ordered from at the airport.
Like 15 people in there.
There's probably another Steve.
Not another Nitro.
Nope.
Definitely not.
Imagine if you met another Nitro. Nope, definitely not. Imagine if you met another Nitro.
That would be sick.
Somebody responded that that was their dog's name.
That'd be cool.
Nitro was the best American Gladiator.
Yeah.
Yep.
He was the best American Gladiator by far.
Did you guys watch that show on American Gladiator?
I heard it was bad, so I didn't watch it.
They were really.
You heard it was bad from Dave.
Yeah.
Because I did the same thing.
Right.
I was going to watch it.
I heard it was bad, though.
I liked it.
I liked it. It happened to be Dave, but I did hear it. I thought it was interesting. You liked it. Yeah. Because I did the same thing. Right. I was going to watch it. I heard it was bad though. I liked it. It happened to be Dave
but I did hear it. I thought it was interesting.
You liked it? Yeah. I mean these people are all
like decrepit and have their lives like
completely ruined by all the... The same people? I mean we actually
hear from those people?
A lot of them. I saw, yeah. Yeah, a lot of them.
What's it on Netflix?
No, I saw something on like ESPN
or something. Are you watching something on Netflix? Oh, it's a 30 for 30.
Pat had it on so I don't know where.
I'll watch it.
I was captivated.
I'll watch it.
Watch that shit.
You guys watch the new Always Sunny?
No.
It's pretty good.
It's good.
What did y'all think about the wet wheel on Friday?
Oh, yeah.
Jerry decided not to get wet classically.
He wet his pants.
He just pissed himself?
What?
Oh, you sent the text.
What did he do?
He said, can I just – we didn't know what to do
because we don't have a shower out there.
And he said, can I piss myself?
I have a question.
Did he get swept in the finals?
Yes.
Okay, I think that should be a rule.
Sweep in the finals.
Sweep in the finals.
You had to piss yourself.
I think Jerry made a rule.
Jerry's just an animal.
Well, that just adds to it.
A sweep.
We've never seen a sweep in the finals.
There must have been one.
There must have been one before.
I don't think so.
There's no way in hell I could piss myself in here.
I could piss myself in 10 seconds.
I think I could.
So fast.
Jerry's not even the first person to piss himself on the yak.
I chated it.
I chated it.
But I can't pee in front of people.
There's no way I'd be able to do it.
I mean, you saw me in your car.
Yeah, but your penis is out. Your dick being away is kind of like the cheat code. No, way I'd be able to do it. You saw me in your car. Yeah, but your penis is out.
Your dick being away is kind of like the cheat code.
No, I wouldn't be able to.
I just couldn't do it.
You're a nervous peer. You can't even piss yourself.
Yes. I could piss myself by myself.
What if we were in the car
and you hadn't had a way to pull over
and pee? I think my bladder would explode
before I could pee.
Shoot out your mouth? I genuinely think
it would just pop.
Comes out your nose
like you're laughing. Would find a new
way to come out.
Making somebody
laugh at the lunch table. A bunch of piss came out
there.
Did you order
almost here?
I haven't ordered.
I got Chipotle today.
Have you guys had the hot salsa recently?
No.
It made it hotter.
Really?
It's fucking me up.
The Subway hot sauce used to be insane.
I don't like when-
It did.
The spicy sriracha was like, what the hell?
I had to Google it.
I was like-
Are you serious?
No, I swear to God.
I think they changed it.
I Googled it, and all the people were like, I'm Indian
and I eat like
traditionally like
spicy Indian food
and this was like,
this was like
the spiciest thing
I've ever had.
You went to an Indian forum
for Subway's hot sauce?
No, it was all
these Indian dudes
being like,
what the fuck?
How do you know
they were Indian dudes?
They said,
they were like,
I'm Indian.
Why do Indian dudes
have like a leg up
on spice?
They eat way spicier foods than we do
Do they?
Yeah like Thai, Indian
Yeah it's way spicier
Thai and Indian aren't the same
I know that's why I said Thai and Indian
Okay but
I was listing places that eat spicy food
What are the spiciest foods?
Thai and Indian?
Probably
I think like
Dude have you ever gone to like an Indian place
Or like a Thai place
And you're like I'll have like the spicy
And they're like
Do you want the actual spicy Or do you want what Americans will think is spicy?
I think Thai is the spiciest food I've ever had.
Yeah, and they're like, you do not want this spicy.
And then you get it thinking that, no, no, I like spicy food.
And then you're like, this is actually fire.
And those people were like, Subway?
Yeah, they fucked it up.
They were like, yeah, they were like, holy shit, the Subway. Dude, I had to leave Subway. By myself they fucked it up. They were like Subway. They were like, yeah. They were like, holy shit.
The Subway.
Dude, I had to leave Subway.
I was by myself.
I had to leave.
I had to go to the store.
I genuinely had to go to the store.
What did you get?
I got a, they didn't have, I went to, the closest store was a smoke shop and they didn't
have milk.
So I got a, one of those like Starbucks ice.
Subway sandwiches had the hottest Sriracha.
I'm pretty sure they changed it.
You might be the whitest dude alive.
I swear to God.
I'm googling it right now.
People complaining.
Spicy sriracha.
I think it was the spicy sriracha.
Subway is too spicy.
And then I made one of my friends try it, and I was like, should we get it again?
He was like, no.
He was like, that ruined my entire day.
Is that also what happened when you ate the hot chip?
You had to leave and go to the store?
Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah.
Hot chip sucks.
This makes me want to go to Subway after this and get the spiciest thing possible because I refuse to believe.
It's hard to believe.
I want to do it and I want to eat it next to an Indian guy.
You're like, what do you think?
You'd be like, holy.
He's going to think you're from Mumbai.
You ever get the hot sauce on the chicken and rice
vendors here
oh it's so hot
that is the
hottest sauce
I've ever encountered
really
yeah
interesting
like I could see
people from the south
will be like
oh like
where are you from
like can you handle
this heat
like the American
southwest
so maybe it's similar
to an Indian guy
being like
oh I'm from like
you know
New Mexico.
I eat spicy shit all the time.
And even this was spicy to me.
But at Subway?
Yeah.
Eating fresh?
What is Subway doing?
This person wrote a whole entire blog about it.
Really?
Yeah.
I think that's what's happening at Chipotle as well.
The hot salsa has gotten hotter.
I'm here for it.
I was literally sweating.
So the fast food industry is trying to condition us now?
I don't know.
I like that, though.
Ordering some for us.
Right now, does anybody want one?
Yeah.
Could I get one?
I don't think.
I think they changed it.
Because of you?
No, because I think everyone was like, what the hell?
The Indian bro is two billion strong.
What's the blog say?
This person said that they put, like, barely any on, and they asked for more, and they
were like, never ask for more.
They were like, one line of it is more than enough.
What sandwich was it?
What sandwich did you get?
I said, wow, this is some seriously spicy stuff.
With exclamation points.
What year was this?
That was 2013.
Okay.
And when I had it, it was probably 2019.
Oh, shit.
So it's been...
Oh, it's been a while.
Oh, it's the creamy sriracha?
Yeah, it's like the spicy...
No!
No!
The creamy...
I've had that.
No way!
Dude, why would someone write an entire blog about it?
Creamy sriracha is just sriracha and mayo.
The pictures suck.
Yeah, it was gross.
What the hell?
Subway blows.
What is that one on the top?
What is that?
Just red.
That's what it looks like.
What is that?
That's what their food looks like.
Do they make the sauce?
I love Subway.
Subway's always fucking, they always deliver.
Like maybe the different stores make the sauce differently.
If you don't like Subway, that's a you problem.
You can make your own sandwich there.
Oh, I think they might have discontinued it. Yeah, I don't like Subway, that's a U-Prot. You can make your own sandwich there. I think they might have discontinued it.
I don't see it anymore.
This person said they discontinued it, and that was a year ago.
So many pussies out there.
But I think that the ingredients outside of the meatballs at Subway are pretty bad.
So bad.
I like that you said outside of the meatballs, though.
Meatballs are on fire.
Tuna's second best.
That's why I can't say Subway's bad, because I would get the— I'd get a foot-long meatball right now. Wait, you say the tuna? Oh, good. Tuna's number two. That's why I can't say Subway's bad because I would get the –
I get a footlong meatball right now.
Wait, you say the tuna?
It's so good.
Tuna's number two.
Yes, I agree.
Meatball's a tuna.
Meatball's good.
The rotisserie is all right.
All right.
Pepperoni's not bad.
Yeah, but –
Just pepperoni.
Have you ever had shitty pepperoni?
Yeah, but do you ever do just a just pepperoni sub?
No, but I would get a meatball.
That's the best.
I would put a bed of pepperoni on my meatball sub. Whoa. You think in your head, you're like, pepperoni's always a side thing. You get a pepperoni sub. But I would get a meatball. That's the best. I would put a bed of pepperoni on my meatball sub.
Whoa.
You think in your head, you're like, pepperoni's always a side thing.
You get a pepperoni pizza.
Like, you get pepperoni in an Italian.
No, no, just pepperoni.
It's great.
Delicious.
Better than salami and ham.
Yep.
Yeah.
Yeah, why doesn't pepperoni get to stand on its own?
Pepperoni's really good.
Virginia, it does.
It gets all the shine in West Virginia.
Fuck yeah.
Oh, don't they have, like, the pepperoni rolls?
Oh, yeah.
Those are big
those are fire
oh good
very good
tailgate
if you go to a football tailgate
with some pepperoni rolls
is that the roll up
oh I'm talking
you ever roll it up
with cream cheese
a little thin thing
you don't use that
never that
but that sounds good
try it
I'm telling you
what do they bake
cream cheese
an underrated
like sandwich edition
yeah
like what kind of sandwich
are we talking
I think cream cheese
gets all the love it deserves.
Yeah, I don't know what I'm talking about.
I was going to give you a chance.
You went too far.
I didn't have enough extra.
Oh, didn't you get, what did you get at Black Seed?
You had like a cream cheese.
That was damn good.
Bacon.
What the fuck was that?
Honey.
What the hell was that? Honey. What the hell was that?
What was that?
What was that?
I mean, they put cream cheese in.
Hot honey cream cheese.
Yeah.
Oh, hot honey is good.
Yeah, I like that.
Nick's hat is just so fucking funny.
I think it's gotten bigger, dude.
It is still.
Just keep catching a glimpse.
Like, what the fuck?
I like the way it fits my head
And I just don't know
It makes you look skinny
Yeah
I feel like that's why
Abraham Lincoln was doing it
To look skinny
He was probably a fat ass
When he took his hat off
Draws the cheekbones up
Looks good
I guess you're right
New episode of Out of Order
Comes out on Wednesday
Oh nice
Yeah
Best one yet? Oh I think it's I think it's a very funny one I guess you're right. New episode of Out of Order comes out on Wednesday. Oh, nice. Yeah.
Best one yet?
Oh, I think it's a very funny one.
We're saying that.
I'm happy with it.
Actually, I haven't seen much of it.
But from what we've filmed, I think it's going to be a good one.
Run these fucking views up.
Yeah.
Everybody watch the last one.
It's catch up.
You think they'll ever be like run it back sketches like on SNL how they'll be like oh this premise
worked we'll do it again. Current characters.
Current characters maybe.
I don't know. Alright.
I don't know. Good answer.
Alright. Where's
Stu right now by the way?
Frank is he at Stu's house just trapped there?
I think they had like a sleepover.
And then he's doing a
I think he's performing at Pete Alon I think they had like a sleepover. And then he's doing a...
I think he's performing at Pete Alonzo's comedy night tonight.
Oh, yeah.
One of all the Mets.
Fuck.
Can we go to that?
Can we get tickets to that?
Frank is?
Yeah, Frank is.
That's a real thing.
Performing?
Yeah.
He's doing a set.
We didn't start the fire.
We didn't start the fire.
But it's like a Mets song.
Yeah.
He wrote a song?
Yeah.
That's big.
Him, Jenks, and Duggs wrote a song? Yeah. That's big.
Him, Jenks, and Dougs did a sleepover at Stu's last night.
Those guys being dudes.
They pulled an all-nighter.
They did?
Yeah.
You didn't see that post?
Oh.
They were staying up until 7 a.m.
Barbecue was humming.
I've seen those boys fall asleep at every time of the day. I don't know.
I've never seen one all day. Yeah.
That would be a sick YouTube video.
Frank stays up for 16 hours.
The Glenie Balls
challenge? Yeah, the Glennie Balls challenge.
I'm about to do
the hardest challenge on the internet.
Oh yeah, he was sleeping there.
Where is this?
They're like watching a band.
Wait, this is a house?
No, this is it. They went to a concert
last night.
She's sitting on a bench.
It looks like a beer hall.
That's the cantina band from Tatooine.
What is this music?
Sounds like jizz.
It does.
All right, get it.
The test layers just changed okay we got anything else
shameless plug for the ZBT
4th of July shirts 100%
of the net proceeds are going to
fixing up they're going to select
a VFW post that needs to be renovated
and New Amsterdam Vodka
is going to work with Barstool
to fix up. But you can
help too and get a cool 4th of July shirt and
have the proceeds go towards fixing up
a VFW.
We also have to talk about Manscaped.
What are you guys going to do for 4th of July?
Have a boat.
You going to be out there? Can we do a party at your house?
Yes. When do you move?
I'm closing next Tuesday, so somewhere after that.
Closing next Tuesday.
Once you close, does that mean you're allowed to be there then?
That's your house.
Okay.
Weren't you there this weekend?
I was, but I just visited.
Just breaking and entering?
No, they let me come in and look at it and measure.
I bet you they were weirded out.
Yeah, very weirded out.
Why were they weirded out?
Were they still living there?
Or is the house like that?
They're selling me the house.
No, they're moving.
I mean, there was boxes everywhere. Like, they're transitioning out. Yeah, very weirded out. Why were they weirded out? Were they still living there? Or is the house like- They're selling me the house. No, they're moving.
I mean, there was boxes everywhere.
Like, they're transitioning out.
Oh, you were going to test out the boat anyway to buy it, right?
I was going to see everything that I was buying from them.
So when are you- No wonder you didn't fish.
You didn't own the house.
Probably by July 1st.
We're going to do a case race before everyone leaves.
I don't do the case races anyway.
Not me.
Sorry, guys.
I am. So it's just going to be the four of us doing a case race?
We could do the nugs and chug.
Brandon would be awesome at that.
Nug and chug.
I'll eat.
You should do a nug and chug.
I'll eat.
We know you'll eat.
What's something else?
Another type of booze we could race or something?
Milkshakes.
I'm pretty into those.
We got the wheel?
Oh.
The wheel's in bad shape, guys.
Why?
What do you mean?
It's down to like, it's an ugly wheel.
Oh, no.
It wet.
Oh, jeez.
Why do we not take wet off?
I don't know.
We don't.
It's only on a wheel reset, I think.
We should take wet off. We got wet the other day. on a wheel reset, I think. We should take wet off.
We got wet the other day.
We've been getting it a ton.
Carbone needs to be...
Carbone's getting bigger.
We'll land on Carbone.
All right, let's spin it.
You calling your shot?
So how does it work if we get Carbone?
Four people go, six people go?
Do we spin another wheel for it?
I can't remember.
All right, let's spin it and we'll find out.
I'll just take people.
What just happened?
Why did you take a dry off?
We hit that dry on Thursday
Oh shit
This is tough
Wheel reset
I'm calling wheel reset
I want carboon
I'm not really that worried about it
Oh
Hey let's talk about Manscaped
Yeah
Y'all
You shave your balls Seth?
You alright y'all? No I your balls, Seth? Y'all?
No, I don't really have hairy balls, though.
Are you serious?
For the sake of the ad.
You have the hairiest balls.
Well, he doesn't anymore because he's been using Manscaped.
What?
What are you talking about?
Wait a second.
You for sure do.
I don't really have hairy balls.
It's got to be coming in, though.
Look at your chin hairs coming in, in like real nice. I don't think
when you're 22 years old you start
growing ball hair.
No, your chin hair's going crazy. I have hair on my
balls. It's just not hairy enough
to like trim. We're watching you become
a man in front of our eyes.
I trim my pubes. They're short
or scarce? Scarce.
But are they long?
Yeah.
Well, I have a remedy for that if you're willing to listen.
Wait, are your guys' balls like fuzzy?
Are we talking?
No, I guess.
They're not like densely populated, but populated.
They're like Tatooine.
I'll say if you have like long random stragglers, you got to get rid of them.
You have just a few strands?
You got to get rid of them. You got to get rid of them, Kate? A couple stragglers, you've got to get rid of them. You have just a few strands? You've got to get rid of them.
You've got to get rid of them, Kate.
A couple stragglers?
Yeah, pretty much.
I know you have to, but why do you think?
A full, thick ball of hair is better than a couple stragglers.
Is that?
I've never even seen, even in a porno, a dude with hairy ass balls.
Like a full head of hair on his balls.
Five o'clock shadow.
I never have understood people like, oh, hairy balls.
Who has hairy balls?
It's more about the above.
Yeah, I shave that.
I don't ever shave my balls.
Oh, the balls are like a chia pet.
No, you got to shave your sack though.
No.
Yeah, you should.
Yeah, you do. You got to. If you have stragglers, you have to your sack though. No. Yeah, you should. Yeah, you do.
If you have stragglers,
you have to. I use my man's
to shave my pubic hair. No, your ball sack.
My balls. If you need a brother
to come over and stretch your balls taut
so you can fucking shave those things,
I'll help you. I'll help you get your crevasses.
I bet you got hair on your balls.
You're saying you don't have hair on your
balls? I have hair on my balls, but it's never been like,
it's not even remotely close to what my pubic hair looks like.
Of course not, but that doesn't mean that you need to ignore it.
I ignore it.
Like, my asshole has more hair than my balls.
By a lot.
Yeah, I guess.
Anyways, Roan.
We got to get the performance package 4.0.
We need to get an ass trimmer out.
It's probably part, you could probably use some of the things in the lawnmower, the performance package.
I mean, the lawnmower 4.0, the weed whacker, ear and nose trimmer, you could probably use that for.
Hole trimmer.
Yeah.
It's a hole trimmer.
I mean, your nose is a hole.
You know, I assume that the good thing about these Manscaped products is they're pretty safe to use.
And you could use the Crop Preserver Ball Deodorant, Crop Reviver Toner, Performance Boxer Briefs to hold all those goodies nice and tight afterwards.
I mean, if you want to get your balls as smooth as sasses, you're going to want to use this Performance Package 4.0 Manscaped.
Their Crop Preserver Ball Deodorant and the
Ball Toner, it's going to have you feeling good after
the fact. Take your Freedom Bells to the next level
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maybe we can go over your house Brandon
come on let's go
when are you guys going to go
I think I'm going July 1st
I'm moving to the end of July
third week of July
damn Brandon that's in like two weeks
I want my kids to have a summer out there
you're such a good father
I'm not going to physically see my house there. You're such a good father.
I'm not going to physically see my house until I move into it, until the day I move in.
That's why I went out and looked at it, just to make sure.
A bold move.
Why don't you go and look at it?
Well, because I feel like it's too late now.
No, you're going to ask your realtor?
You're buying their house, right?
But it's too late now, right? But I mean, you could at least have ideas.
Stop being so polite.
You are paying money to buy their house.
They will let you come look at it.
I just feel like it's already too late.
I already-
You're just going to waste money on a trip there.
Right, to do what?
You're just going to say yes, that's fine.
Yeah, exactly.
Don't you want to see it and feel it?
Plan what you're going to wear and shit?
Make the mood a bit more special.
I think, yeah, I'm going to just keep it-
House reveal.
I don't see the point.
I'm excited for it.
I'm a little concerned.
What does it really look like?
It's a house reveal.
Yeah, it's a house reveal. It's a house review.
It's a good old fashioned house review. It starts July 1st.
But I'm doubling up on rents which sucks.
But I found a really good deal out there.
I think the plan is... Very very dangerous area.
The act won't move
start doing it
in Chicago until mid-August
I think is what we talked about.
So you guys might have to carry the load for a little bit.
Say less.
When is the last show that we're all together?
What was it, like the 28th of July or something?
Or August maybe?
We have to do some big, big things.
I got an idea that I'll throw out to you guys before.
Why don't you throw it out right now?
No, I'm going to throw it out after
because I don't want to get people all up our ass being like,
blah, blah, blah.
You said you'd do this.
Hey, you mean
already doing that.
Me and Sass,
you give us,
you tell us what
you need from us
and we're due
to full soldiers,
brother.
We'll fucking step
up to the fucking plate.
Yeah.
You let us know
what you need.
Boots on the ground.
We're boots on the ground.
We're your eyes
and ears out here. We're like a periscope. Okay? Tip of the spear. Boots on the ground. We're boots on the ground. We're your eyes and ears out here.
We're like a periscope, okay?
Tip of the spear.
The tip of the spear.
The spear.
The handle of the spear.
The little ribbon.
Want some sporkle?
Yeah, we could do some sporkle.
We're an hour and a half.
Yeah, we might as well do a little sporkle.
Oh, yak sporkle?
No, no, no, Brandon.
You're going to stay in sporkle with us.
No, I got to.
No, you don't.
One sporkle, Brandon.
One sporkle. PTSD for you? Huh? Is this PTSD? No. Let's going to stay in Sporkle with us. No, you don't. One Sporkle, Brandon.
One Sporkle.
Is this PTSD?
No.
One Sporkle for the whole crew. I have John coming in today.
Who?
I've got to pick his brain.
Oh, I actually have to talk to him.
Okay.
What time is he coming in?
When I say he's coming in, I meant on Zoom.
Oh.
Can I talk to him then, too?
Son of a bitch.
Six?
It's fucking 2.30, Brandon.
I have the Clemmer show recording.
I've got to...
Quit the Clemmer show.
I'm still doing it.
I'm doing it until I go to Chicago.
We were just talking about the end of this show.
These guys, you know, we're going our separate ways.
I know.
That's sentimental.
How many more Sporkles do we have?
The unit.
Okay.
Let's do a sporkle.
This is special. Sass, you know the drill.
Switch seats? Oh, yeah.
Fine, that's a good one.
Let's save the yak one for the end.
For the last sporkle we ever do.
Oh, you already did it? Alright, so then let's not do the yak one.
There's a yak sporkle?
Yeah, but Sass already did it.
How'd you do?
I got like 70% and the average was like 48%.
Some of them were like really deep dives.
Let's do it.
Yeah, let's do the Yaks, Borkle.
Sass already did it.
But Sass is only one man.
I don't know.
It's like doing trivia about yourself. Yeah, I don't know Doing trivia about yourself
Yeah I don't like it
It's not
I mean
It's about the show
Alright fine
Let's fucking do it
We don't have to do it
I don't care
Alright pull it up
You can't do it then
I don't give a goddamn
You've already done it
So you can't
You can't compete
I'm gonna do it
No you
No but I am
If you don't win
That would be funny
You freaking bastard Well it's not really fun It's not really funny I'm going to do it. No, but I am. If you don't win, that would be funny.
You freaking bastard.
Well, it's not really fun.
It's not really funny.
He doesn't win?
He doesn't win.
I mean, we're not going to make fun of him for not winning.
Well, because we respect him.
He's not going to sit around moping or anything. Joke's played.
Right.
Yeah.
We got that out of our system.
And I'm not going to do anything mean to you anymore.
Yes, you are.
I'm not.
You didn't send me the picture today.
I'm done.
Okay, thank you.
I'm interviewing Seth Rollins today, though.
He just believed me the last time I said that.
He was so distraught over trivia, he was just like, what?
No.
I was in my feelings about that shit.
I got Jordan Barry to email me a booking time for Seth.
I vigorously apologized
to Kyle and he's like, well, I don't care.
Yeah, I didn't, to be honest.
We should have won. Well, no, we lost.
We could have won.
Alright.
Alright.
Alright.
Okay, here we go. KB, you start.
That was a lot about me.
This is surreal. You gotta go in order. You have to go in order? We can go in order. I'll startB, you start. That was a lot about me. This is surreal.
You got to go in order.
You have to go in order?
We can go in order.
I'll start.
I'll start.
The man who lived in Brandon's hometown, Poke Banana.
KB said, very guys having a manage at this.
All right, I'm out.
This could be anything.
Oh, you know what?
I didn't get this one or the one after it.
Boys, come on.
Who won the hot?
I don't know any of these.
Wait, KB said married guys have an advantage.
I remember this.
We just go out of order?
We can go out of order?
Can we go out of order?
Let's go out of order.
It was violence-centric.
Slap the slap.
All right, go ahead.
Yeah, let's go out of order.
Can we go out of order or no?
Slap wheel. Just click on anything. Oh, okay. Slap wheel? Okay. Oh, yeah, there you slap. All right, go ahead. Yeah, let's go out of order. Can we go out of order or no? Slap wheel.
Just click on anything.
Oh, okay.
Slap wheel.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, there you go.
All right, so yeah.
Roan, go ahead.
Kyle just got it. Pick anyone that you know the answer to.
Frank the Tank.
Who is suspect number two?
Oh, what?
You're allowed to say that.
You're not allowed to say that legally.
What the fuck, Roan?
Does this guy know something we don't know?
I mean, this is already
Alright go ahead
Um
The founder of 10X
Grant Cardone
Who poofed beers in college
That'd be Dana Beers
What is poofing?
Putting it up your butt
TJ's tattoo from L.A. is Shark Eat Duck.
KB No Swag's manager is Chaz Gresham.
Yeah.
Pull.
Good pull, Nick.
Good pull.
All right, Kate.
He was too fat for the trampoline.
I'm sorry, Big Cat.
No. No.
Okay, Kate's out.
Wait, what?
You're so bad at this.
You're so bad at this.
Jesus Christ.
You're so bad at this.
And you found a way to call back.
Yeah.
That was insane.
All right, KB, your turn.
Oh, God damn it.
All right, KB.
This is why I'm not on the dozen.
This is literally...
It's like the easiest.
What announcement did Kate make?
Pregnant.
She's mad for a trampoline.
Alright, Roan.
What won't Kate's son stop doing to people?
Biting.
Alright. Sass? What won't Kate Stunt stop doing to people? Biting Ooh
Not right
Sass
Um
Who was too fat for a trampoline?
Brandon
Yeah
Brandon's alias
I don't remember that either
What was I talking about?
When we did the invitation
Oh fuck
Brandon's alias to creep on the dozen
Alan
I think it's A-L-L-E-N.
What celebrity did Roan guess correctly?
John Madden.
Yes.
Yes.
Top right, second one.
Judging off this quiz, I'm not on the show.
And I'm like the fucking legend.
He's on it a lot.
I love how one of them is just name of Sass and Roan's podcast.
How about we get a fucking board at the end?
Go to college?
Yeah, let's do another one.
Let's do a different one that we could actually play and have fun.
Yeah, that felt weird.
This is fun for Yak fans.
Hey, there's a grab bag too?
Yeah, it's for Yak fans, not for us.
One rate, 1.0 rate.
That's got to be dog shit.
Yeah, just search grab bag.
This is the real one.
Wait, grab bag two, though, the 1.0 rated, did you do that one, Sass?
Oh, I don't think so.
All right.
Did they change them or no?
No, they don't change these.
I forgot if I did both of them.
Why aren't there more grab bags?
Cartoons.
Let's do logos again.
Logos are fun.
You've done so many.
Logos by face.
That's cool.
What does that mean?
Logos by face.
Oh.
Oh, but it's not.
Oh, but it's in order.
Oh, thanks.
Oh, thank you.
Yeah, I'm going to pass.
Pass.
Logos by feet?
It's the same thing.
What?
It's got to be the same thing.
Oh, what about logos anagram?
The fuck?
That's pipes.
Oh, this is easy.
It's pretty easy.
Yeah, I guess so.
It's easy. Pipes easy pipes all right next one
dude they gotta make more grab bags on this freaking site logos
i bet you they look like soccer crests no i don't want to do that but their nfl logo is
oh sports logos up close oh we did that, right? We did this.
Shit.
How are there not more grab bags?
All right, let's just see what Britified is.
No, no, no, no, Brandon.
Do it on your own.
I just want to see what it is.
Sorry, Brandon.
Yeah, too.
I want to say that's pretty easy.
All right, wait.
Try just searching miscellaneous.
Or like random.
Or like going to grab bag page eight or some shit.
Click miscellaneous in the top right.
No, because that will just give you a completely random.
Rowan, can you read music?
No.
You're like Nick Cannon in Drumline.
Oh, yeah.
General knowledge, yeah.
What note is this?
It's not reading music.
It's a B-flat.
It's hearing.
That was a C-sharp.
I can read notes.
I don't have to count.
It's E, bro.
It was E?
Remember the woman who figured out the notes of our farts?
King of general knowledge.
It's all going to be kingship.
What the fuck is this?
Damn it.
It has the word king in it.
Oh, get out of here.
Get out, get out, get out.
Get out of this.
Get out of this.
Sucked.
I fucking hated that one.
General knowledge Jeopardy style?
Maybe.
No.
No.
No.
Keep going.
Keep going.
Go next yeah
Hmm Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
Hmm
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Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Hmm Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Great one Oh, the great sporkle grab bag, maybe? It says great, though. Everything's great. Oh, it's too small anyway.
Can't read any of it.
Great one.
Get out of here.
Jesus Christ.
It's all great.
Didn't you get a bunch that were good?
I just want general knowledge.
Good sporkles?
Oh, yeah.
Did I send that to the Yak?
I don't want to just give us general.
No.
God damn it.
Just put in a grab bag without general knowledge.
There's almost useless trivia.
There's some good ones if you type that in.
Let's see what all comes up.
We did all the grab bags.
Go to like page five.
Now it's just all these other grab bags.
It's a logo grab bag.
Logo grab bag could be fun.
One more up.
Right there.
We've done this.
We could do this.
All right.
He's got like a mix of sports.
All right.
All right, KB.
This is really, really easy, I think.
Oh, no.
Oh, fuck.
It's easy.
It's easy.
All right.
Let's do a different one.
Let's do a different one.
What did you say? It's a search It's easy. All right, let's do a different one. Find a different one. Jeez.
What did you say?
It's a search, Roan.
Is that Uncle Ben?
He and Aunt Jemima are canceled, right?
Yeah.
All we got left is the Zatarans guy.
Zatarans.
The general knowledge grab bag. This isn't a very good show right now.
Bad even.
I'm searching for some sweet-ass fucking trivia for us to find.
Fucking shit.
So.
Yeah, what's going on?
What's new with you guys?
Anyone get a new tall hat?
Oh, could this be?
It's too small.
That looks good.
No, really?
Okay, here we go.
Go ahead, KB.
This one's tough.
Anyone?
Yeah, any of them.
I don't know that.
God damn, these are hard.
God damn, these are hard.
These are really hard.
I swear.
One day, my four little children.
I don't know any of these.
I don't think anyone knows any of these.
I don't think I know any of them.
In which hand does the Statue of Liberty hold her famous torch?
The left?
Is it right?
I think it's right.
It's right.
Definitely right.
I only know one of these.
Right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What is the name of the trophy awarded to the Super Bowl MVP?
You guys don't know that?
No.
Should.
It's the Heisman.
It's the Heisman.
Is it the...
Is it...
White chocolate is not technically chocolate because it does not contain which ingredient?
Cacao?
Ooh, Campbell's Soup Cans. Fuck. Is that Andy Cacao? Ooh, Campbell's soup cans.
Fuck. Is that Andy Warhol?
Yeah, that's Andy Warhol.
Good pool sass. Thank you.
We really need a better Sporkle plan
before we dive in. Yeah.
I will do one tomorrow. What?
Yeah. Oh, octopus hearts.
13. What?
You just know octopus has 13 hearts?
That's the one fact I do know.
Doubly landlocked?
I think Afghanistan.
How are you doubly landlocked?
Every country that borders you is as well.
That's one fact he does know.
Pete Rozelle trophy.
That's the one you got, man.
It's the Pete Rozelle trophy, Brandon.
Wait, is it not 13 hearts?
He didn't, yeah, it's definitely, Brandon. Is it not 13 hearts? He didn't...
Yeah, it's definitely...
The octopus one is 13.
Maybe spell out 13?
You gotta go to the clue.
You gotta click on it.
It's real bad.
Real bad.
It's down.
It's right below what Real bad. It's down. It's right below.
Shortest question.
Shortest question.
Right there.
Don't even bother.
That's how hard this quiz is.
Right there.
I don't think it's 13.
Is it 8?
I don't know what it is.
I'm leaving.
Wait, no, come on.
We got to get this one.
You can only leave when we answer the octopus question.
It's either 13 or 7.
You ate.
It's an odd number, and it's a prime.
Why am I typing it out?
No, it'll definitely be an odd number.
It's not 8.
Or 6.
6?
How about 2?
2?
Yeah, 2 sounds good.
1, 3?
11.
Crazy.
Ah!
It was prime.
It was odd.
Routine's a lot of hearts.
1916, world's first billionaire.
Who was that?
Oh, white chocolate.
Vanderbilt?
That's who I was thinking.
Vanderbilt?
Anderson Cooper's old grandpappy?
There's one.
White chocolate is not technically chocolate because it's not.
We got that one.
Oh, you guys already did that.
The three we got, brother.
I thought I was going to save the day with that one.
Who's ever heard of?
Madea?
Tyler Perry? I thought it was the richest.
Tyler Perry?
Rockefeller?
The American actor nominated for an Emmy Award for the same character on three different shows.
H.H. Holmes.
It's an E instead of an A.
Going H.H. Holmes. Where are some E instead of an A. Going H.H. Holmes.
Where are some old rich guys?
Howard Hughes.
Got it.
Got it?
Oh, come on.
Who's the guy who plays Medea?
Who the fuck would know?
She consumes the most mac and cheese.
Gotta be U.S.
No, I.
It's like turkey or some shit.
Andy Warhol?
We got that one.
Oh, you did?
Yeah.
Italy?
I think she held it in her right hand, right?
What's going on?
I just want to go.
All right, we can end the show.
Brandon, we'll end the show.
Y'all wouldn't let me.
No, you're right.
Brandon wants to end the show.
Brandon has something to do in three hours.
You need us to let you? All right, we'll see you tomorrow. I don't need coaching, Kyle. Brandon won't let me Brandon has something to do in three hours
We'll see you tomorrow
I don't need coaching Kyle
Show's over
I wonder what that mac and cheese one was
Kyle Outro Music