The Yak - Lil Sas's Salary Negotiation With Dave DID NOT Go Well | The Yak 12-9-21

Episode Date: December 10, 2021

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo. Yo. Hello. Is my mic on? Oh, Sass, did you close the door? What, do you live in a barn? I never got that one.
Starting point is 00:00:38 Yeah, because barns, they have. No, barns have doors that they close. Wait, Sass, stand right in front of me. Motherfuckers are moving Into barns rapidly now Yeah, barns are Like the suburban sprawl Going into like Traditionally rural areas
Starting point is 00:00:50 They're just renovating barns Barns just having Writing an album in a barn Or people will make A city house And they'll give it A barn door inside Like one of those
Starting point is 00:00:58 Sliding doors You know Or the garage doors At bars I actually think A garage door At a bar Makes it Awesome Your Chicago is showing Dude, your Chicago Garage doors at bars? I actually think a garage door at a bar makes it awesome.
Starting point is 00:01:06 Your Chicago is showing, dude. Your Chicago is very much showing through. Garage door? You've lost me there. So there's these things. So like in the – hold on one sec, Frank. In the wintertime, like you can let your car sleep in it? Wait.
Starting point is 00:01:22 I don't get it. Oh, like a car hole? It's a car bed inside. It's a car house. Like a truck bed? Like the bed of a truck? It's a car house. It's like a dog house for a car.
Starting point is 00:01:32 Oh, that contextualizes it perfectly. Like what Snoopy lived in, but if Lightning McQueen lived in it. Yeah. Frank, hello. Thursday. Tank Thursday. Good to see you. Good to be here.
Starting point is 00:01:46 Will you be joining us with Ruff and Rowdy? I'm not going to Ruff and Rowdy this time. There was a little bit of a miscommunication. Basically, I let known that I wanted to go to Army-Navy because Army-Navy is Saturday. And I'm going to go to the Army-Navy game. And it would have been impossible for me to do both. Army-Navy, are you going to come to the Army-Navy game. And it would have been impossible for me to do both. Army-Navy, are you going to come to our tailgate? I'll stop by, yeah. Me and Doug will have to figure out where it is.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Okay. I'll give you all the details. That sounds great. Yeah. Awesome. All right. What was the miscommunication? Good to have you back, Tay.
Starting point is 00:02:22 The miscommunication was they didn't think I wanted to go to Ruffer Mowdy. But it's not possible? It would have been very tough. So a good miscommunication. Getting to Charleston, West Virginia is not exactly easy. It would have been a lot happier if it was in Charlestown. Yeah. Agreed.
Starting point is 00:02:43 Agreed. Did we just West Virginia-splain to KB? Yeah. I don't know if you know this, but so there's a Charlestown and a Charleston. That sounds like it's confusing. Dave definitely doesn't know
Starting point is 00:02:55 which one we're going with. He thinks there's one and they've just been... I remember the last time we went to Charleston, he texted me like a day before and he's like, we should get there early
Starting point is 00:03:03 so we can bet on the horses. And I was like well not quite honey sweetie sweet cheeks I mean I like Charlestown I like Charlestown Charleston's good too but it's difficult to get to
Starting point is 00:03:19 what about that golden dome Chuck Yeager what about the dome? The Capitol building. Nah, I'm anti-Charleston. Oh, Charles Yeager. The guy, is that the Charles from Charleston? Chuck Yeager, the pilot.
Starting point is 00:03:36 Fast, flew fast. Sass, how you doing? Good. I was going to wear the headphones, but it just doesn't look right with the hat I have on. That's fair. Yeah, you've been holding the headphones up. I know gotta get a haircut dude i don't i have no explanation so there's plenty of places to go i just don't like getting haircuts makes me extremely anxious what were where were you late why were you late because i was busy who are you meeting with dave
Starting point is 00:03:59 how'd it go uh it went fine not Not great. Not bad, though. Oh. So I guess that'd be fine. Yeah. Yeah. Not bad. Pretty much. But no, it was a good meeting. Did you bring up McAfee's new deal?
Starting point is 00:04:15 And you're like, eh. McAfee's getting $30 million a year. Really? Pat McAfee. That, by the way, is, and congratulations to Pat, I don't think people realize that. I think that pays for his whole operation. I don't think that's just Pat's. You know what I mean? His employees as well.
Starting point is 00:04:29 In corresponding news, everyone's fired, though. Yes. I've always wanted to try to do this solo. It'd be like if the Yak signed a deal for $20 million. That would probably, I'd only get like 19 of them. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, probably. Make you guys wrestle for the other mill.
Starting point is 00:04:45 Brandon would actually murder everyone. I would murder for a scrap of that other mill. For that mill? Yeah. We have Brandon. I think Brandon would actually beat up everyone if money was on the line. His rage.
Starting point is 00:04:58 Did he spit in a fan's face last night? He did. No. No, he didn't. He didn't. But that's why he is suspended from this show because he spit in a fan's face Which he didn't do
Starting point is 00:05:06 But he's suspended He was real upset About that last night He was He was hot I mean I get it Like I got why he was pissed If he just had normal
Starting point is 00:05:12 Interaction with someone And they walked away And they were like Bro Brandon Walker's a dick I don't think it was That kid Brandon Walker Yeah
Starting point is 00:05:19 I assume they were probably Like he was probably like Hey how's it going And that was it Well Brandon gave him his five minutes. Che, you remember Brandon almost got into a fight at the Iguana house. He did?
Starting point is 00:05:31 At the zoo. Oh, you had left. Steven, why are you all dressed up? You got a fucking funeral today? You got a couch to sell? Someone die? What the fuck did you dress like that for? What if the answer is yes?
Starting point is 00:05:41 I would have been like, oh, that's too bad. You dressed up for Bob Dole? No. His funeral? 98. Did he die? Too young. He killed himself.
Starting point is 00:05:50 Really? 98. Because of what happened with the Bucs, he was so broken up about them, forging the ID cards that he couldn't stand life on Earth. No, he died at 98 because he was 98. Died at 98. That's a long-ass life. That's an awesome life.
Starting point is 00:06:04 That's cool. Decades ago. That's an awesome life. That's cool. Decades ago, he was running for president. What the fuck, TJ? Recently? Decades ago. That looks perfect on you, Nick. Yeah, it does. It looks good.
Starting point is 00:06:17 I have always wanted Nick's legs. Am I full corduroy? Why do you want my legs? I was just joking. That was a good joke. Did you see me fucking fall for legs? I was just joking. You're three-quart. That was a good joke. That was good. Did you see me fucking fall for it? You did.
Starting point is 00:06:28 I bit. I fucking bit. I don't know why you're stick legs. Bob Doe would have been president. We would have had a vice president that played professional football. Who's his running mate? Jack Kemp. Ah, yes.
Starting point is 00:06:41 That's right. That's right. Little history lesson for the people out there. Steven, so the funeral today, who died? Ah, yes, that's right. That's right. A little history lesson for the people out there. Steven, so the funeral today, who died? No, I dress up for a video I film on Thursdays for the Fans Football Factory Parlay. There's a lot of pressure tonight because I've hit three big parlays in a row. Was it plus 900 last week?
Starting point is 00:07:02 We had a plus 513, a plus 700, and a plus 900. Tonight's going to be plus 700. It's live in the Barstool Sportsbook. It is? Yeah. I've got to film the video, and then that's my way of promoting it. Wow. That's fantastic news. Consummate professional.
Starting point is 00:07:14 You look very good. You look great. You look like a snack. Thank you. My wife hates this jacket. Why? It's been in her closet for 10 years. Her closet?
Starting point is 00:07:22 I don't know. I'm getting a lot of compliments on it. Yeah, I like it. Enrique, people upstairs. Enrique, huh? Yeah. He said he likes the jacket. Does his compliment
Starting point is 00:07:31 weigh a little bit more than everyone else's? No. To me, it would. Big time. Big time. I mean, he knows fashion, so. Why?
Starting point is 00:07:40 Why does he know fashion? He's kind of a gamer nerd. Gamer nerd. What makes you think Enrique know fashion? He's kind of a gamer nerd. Gamer nerd. What makes you think Enrique knows fashion? Yeah, yeah, because you said that. I don't know what it was based off of. Is it a Hispanic thing? He's never talked about fashion to me.
Starting point is 00:07:57 He's also not like, you know, he dresses fine, but he's not wearing anything that seems like it's cutting edge fashion. Can you split to Enrique Cam? You like to wear t-shirts. Is he in like a tuxedo or something? I think he knows what looks good in matches. You said he was into fashion. He knows fashion. He's having a good bang day. That thing is hanging.
Starting point is 00:08:19 Bang energy, bro. Look at it. He's unflappable. He's unflappable. He's unflappable. He's completely unflappable. No fun with that. Oh, that's because we got old blue eyes over there. Oh, blue eyes.
Starting point is 00:08:34 Sharpshooter with those things. We got blue eyes guarding the door. He's smirking looking in here. Those things see everything. I would... I fall head over heels in a tennis suit. Yeah, it's not that fun now, is it? Look at those eyes.
Starting point is 00:08:43 You want to tell on yourself, motherfucker? Look at those eyes. The Caribbean Ocean has nothing on those eyes. My word. Mercy, mercy me. Something funny. These things zoom.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Yeah. Look at those eyes. What's that fucking Lana Del Rey song? Goo Goo Dolls wrote Iris about him. They are beautiful. Those ocean eyes.
Starting point is 00:09:08 My boy's got ocean eyes. Island boys. Looks like Turks and Caicos. Anyway, why does Enrique like fashion? Yeah, yeah. You're off the hook. Let's talk about... So wait, where does everyone stand
Starting point is 00:09:20 on the Brandon Walker thing? So legitimately... Like, you guys actually seem to have a side. I kind of was... I thought it was pretty funny he got so true i mean he was very mad like oh yeah i mean that was the question first that also the can you pull up brandon walker's the tweet he sent where he's standing in the hallway for the guys it's ridiculous but i do think i i side with brandon in the fact that like i i think think Brandon probably had a normal interaction with the person. And then for them to be like, it wasn't normal kind of sucks.
Starting point is 00:09:49 And then publicly tweeting it. Yeah. Kind of funny. Yeah, it is kind of funny. Did you have an argument with Brandon Walker where? Well, the problem was it was believable. And that's Brandon's fault. Right.
Starting point is 00:09:59 That was tweeted at you guys. No one was going to see that if you didn't respond. I didn't respond. I didn't do anything with it. I just sent it to Brandon. But then Brandon responded. And got very upset. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:09 And waited for the dude. This tweet is the biggest lie ever told on the internet. Not quite. That's what you would say when it was not quite a lie. There's a little bit of truth in that. Brandon was a little confrontational. Look at this. He is pissed there. Come meet me. Come was a little confrontational. Look at this. He is pissed there. Come meet
Starting point is 00:10:28 me. Come meet me in this hallway. I know. What was he hoping for the outcome to be? He was gonna give him a show. Just debate. He loves to debate. Debate me. I am not rude. Come meet me in this hallway so I can tell you how not rude I am. No one has ever challenged someone to a debate without steam
Starting point is 00:10:44 coming out of their ears. No one's challenged a grown man to meet him in the hallway to prove that they're nice. You showed your support. Yeah, fuck him up, Brandon. That's what I said. Let's go, Brandon. I am willing to debate any liberals in the office if anyone will want to debate about anything. No, because they just won't listen to fucking logic. It's true.
Starting point is 00:11:03 It's a disease. Is it true that Brandon actually thinks they're chanting, let's go, Brandon, for him? Yes. He does. He fully believes that. It's the peak of his delusion. There was one moment.
Starting point is 00:11:14 I think obviously now he knows, but there was one moment that we were, it was like right after it happened, we were at a college football show, and there was a sign that said, let's go, Brandon. And he looked at me like, and I was like was like do you know i think he might have known but it would have been funny for him to just walk around being like i'm really popular right now let's go brandon everywhere what is what was my question owen why do you think enrique knows fashion oh yeah That's a great question. Who else? What was that? That's some people tap dancing around the circle.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Why do you think Enrique is a tap dancer? I think he does. I think Sass is tap dancing after answering that question. Enrique does have his degree in musical theater, I believe. So wait, Sass, back to your big meeting. So it was not good, not bad. It was a meeting. It was just a meeting.
Starting point is 00:12:10 If we did a, you know how like in a game, it has a win probability? It was not a win. No, but was there ever, was the win probability ever on your side? Never. Okay. So you were the underdog going in. The ball was kicked off and you were losing. As soon as I went in, the win probability was off your side? Never. Okay. So you were the underdog going in. The ball was kicked off and you were losing. As soon as I went in, the win probability was on my side.
Starting point is 00:12:27 You walked in. I think when I walked, maybe when I was halfway through the entrance of the door, I thought it was on my side. And then as soon as I sat down, instantly off my side. All the way. And it was never, did it ever like- No, not even close. Did it go, it went-
Starting point is 00:12:41 It actually kept going down. Oh, so- The highest point was- It kept going down until I just accepted defeat. Did you fail to plan? Did you fail to plan? Because failing to plan is planning to fail. No, Sass actually, in fact, was here at like 9.20 in the morning.
Starting point is 00:12:58 I was standing there and he walked in. I was like, what's going on here? Like, well, I got a big meeting with Dave. You did go in with a briefcase with papers just spilling out of it. I was like, what's going on here? Like, well, I got a big meeting with Dave. Yeah. You did go in with a briefcase with papers just spilling out of it. What was on those sheets? What was on those charts?
Starting point is 00:13:11 Did you do a bit? Did you try a bit? Did you try a sketch? Drawings. What if he had said, hey, do a sketch. If you make me laugh, you get... Make me laugh right now. You get Pat McAfee deal.
Starting point is 00:13:23 Yeah, I don't know. You don't think he could pull it off? For $30 million, you couldn't make the boss man laugh? No, I think I could. We had a good laugh at one point. What was the laugh? Oh, really? What was it about?
Starting point is 00:13:31 It was about how much money I wasn't getting. Nice. I found that charts and PowerPoints don't really work with him. No, we had a miscommunication when we laughed it off like pals. Ah, nice. He doesn't have headphones, Stephen, so he couldn't hear what you said. I found that charts and things of that nature don't really have an effect on Dave.
Starting point is 00:13:49 No, your PowerPoint was great, Stephen. We all know that. No, I did have a PowerPoint. I didn't show it to him, though. Oh, okay. But I had it there. It was a mental PowerPoint. Five tool player?
Starting point is 00:13:59 I came in, and he was like, what, do you have a presentation or something? And I was like, no. Why would I have that? And I, like, X'd out of it. I'm not a pussy. Did you actually? No, but he did say that I was like, no. Why would I have that? And I like X'd out of it. I'm not a pussy. Did you actually? No, but he did say that
Starting point is 00:14:09 and I said no while I have a presentation up on my laptop. Did you actually? Yes. Oh, so you walked in holding an open laptop? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:14:16 Can we see the presentation? Oh, I get why you would think that. Why? Why would I ever do that? Why would you ever not do that? Steven did it. Steven showed us his presentation. Yeah, I'm not going to do that.
Starting point is 00:14:26 There's not really much to see. How many slides is it? It was one slide. Sounds like you're not a 5-2 player. I think it was eight slides. But did you have a title slide? The title is Lil Sasquatch. Okay. By Lil Sasquatch. What was the first one? A little comedic relief in it. That was funny. Right in the beginning.
Starting point is 00:14:41 When you need the relief. How'd you fly in the text? This shit isn't need the relief. How'd you fly in the text? This shit isn't funny at all. What? How did you fly in the text? What do you mean? Did it like zoom in? Did it go like,
Starting point is 00:14:51 woo, woo, woo? I know a star wipe when I see one. Oh, yeah. It was like disintegrating and stuff. Dissolve. That's fire.
Starting point is 00:14:56 Can you show it to Stephen Chay because Stephen Chay won't make us... No, I don't have it. It's on my laptop. Okay. Wait, so you walked in with it open
Starting point is 00:15:03 and he asked you if you had a presentation, then you said no and exited out? Exited out? I just didn't show him it. Why? You say no to it. There was no reason for him to see it.
Starting point is 00:15:12 Why? Yes, it was. If you prepared it for him to see. I just read my slot. I mean, it was an instant. It doesn't matter. It instantly didn't go how I wanted it to go. I mean, let's be honest.
Starting point is 00:15:21 This is how probably every 20-year-old's presentation to their boss for a raise goes. Yeah, I don't know. I mean, it really wasn't that. I told you my story last year, or a couple weeks ago, how I got a $1,000 raise. Thinking I was going to get a $20,000 raise. Yeah, that's basically exactly what happened. Except I got nothing. It happens.
Starting point is 00:15:41 He gave me a pack of Skittles. Could be worse. My dumb ass signed an 11-year contract. I'm renegotiating at 40. Did you say Viva to him on the way out? Oh, yeah, of course. Okay, good. I was going to say, if he didn't do that, then...
Starting point is 00:15:57 Shake his hand. He did say he doesn't think I give a fuck about Barstool. I mean, that's probably... Which I don't think is true. I didn't say that. Why? Yeah, I would't say that. Why? Yeah, I would never tell that to his face. Why? Why wouldn't you say that?
Starting point is 00:16:12 That supports you. You might be the worst negotiator alive. It wasn't. No, you guys don't get it. There was no negotiation. There should have been, though. But there wasn't. There should have been. But you should have said I do care about Barstool. For what? There was no reason. He was like, I don should have said, I do care about Barstool. For what? There was no reason.
Starting point is 00:16:27 He was like, I don't care. And I was like, I don't know. But you do know. It was a completely normal meeting. But you do care about Barstool. Yes. So why don't you let him know that? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:16:40 I mean, I've been working here for a year and a half, and I'm going to probably be working here for like 30 more years. So I don't think I need to prove that I care about that. So you signed a 30-year deal. Stewart Clubhouse. Congratulations on your 30-year deal. You guys, the meeting was completely normal. We should actually do that to Cuck McAfee, like Lil Sass, big announcement. Lil Sass signed a 30-year deal worth $1 million total.
Starting point is 00:17:06 Yeah. It's enormous. It's back-loaded, though. Back-loaded. Look at Enrique's outfit. That guy knows fashion. He knows fashion. Holy fuck, Sass.
Starting point is 00:17:18 It was a completely fine meeting. Like, it went, like, well. Like, it wasn't, like... Oh! What a moment caught on camera. TJ. TJ, you're an absolute sleuth. It wasn't like I did anything dumb or said anything.
Starting point is 00:17:34 I made my points and he made his points. It was very normal. You know when Owen had his review, we did it on audio. Yeah. We listened to it. Yeah. Gaz was a good actor. He was. That went great. We got the New audio. Yeah. We listened to it. Yeah. Gaz was a good actor. He was.
Starting point is 00:17:47 That went great. We got the New York State minimum. Yeah. For waitresses. You guys are going to have to rent out your shower. Probably. Airbnb the shower. Because sometimes when you're a tourist walking around New York, it's so hard to find a bathroom.
Starting point is 00:18:04 Memberships to bathrooms would be awesome. You build a really nice, clean bathroom. Like a gym membership? Yeah. It's like a parking garage. Yeah. You essentially just have, on every other block, there's a super, super nice, cleaned bathroom. There's somebody working there.
Starting point is 00:18:19 It's safe. You're never in there. And there's barbells and dumbbells in it. I like that. Like treadmills or something like that. I don't think that would ever work. You could park your car. Yeah, you could also have your car there.
Starting point is 00:18:31 What if you could sleep there too? Yeah, and there's like... I don't know. Beds, that sounds crazy. Televisions and stuff like that. Kind of sit on the couch. Kind of candy. Somebody that brings you food.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Then you check in and check out? I think that that's feasible. I think that we might be fucking on to something here, though. I don't know. You know, they actually experimented about 20 years ago with paid toilets. They were like basically porta-potties that you had to put like a dollar to get into. I've paid for a toilet at a road stop once. I feel like Europe
Starting point is 00:19:06 has those. For toilet paper. I think it's a southern thing. In Europe, you gotta pay like anywhere you go to the bathroom. Yeah, I remember
Starting point is 00:19:12 being in France taking a train and having to take to pay to use the toilet. I prefer it. Yeah. Because it's like guaranteed cleanliness.
Starting point is 00:19:21 You're getting something for a barrier of entry. Also, aren't the bathrooms in Europe like you go in and it's like there's a little bit like a girl shitting in the stall next to you? Unisex, you mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:30 That's actually true. No, like, no, that's what they're like. It's like boys. It's like there's just one bathroom. Yeah. There's a big laxative problem in women. I think that's happening in the U.S. a little bit. It is.
Starting point is 00:19:41 It is. We went to a bar. I went to a bar recently and the bathroom was... How? What? How did you go to a bar? Oh, I paid the bouncer. Okay. Steven, what do you think about this whole sass-faking, falsifying
Starting point is 00:19:58 documents? He could probably play for the Bucs. We gotta hear his side of the story. Yeah, you could play for the Bucs. What's your side of the story Yeah you could play for the Bucs What's your side of the story Sass? I don't have one Alright we've heard it What do you think now? You gotta take a drive
Starting point is 00:20:18 I mean it's not his day for presenting cases so Let's give him a pass Immediately takes off the headphones Jay how's the contract deal going or the content deal we're on the same page me and you what do you say we're on the same page me and you why don't you wear the headphones don't you care about barstool i guess not because those guys behind the glass those guys are barstool i literally like something i look like deformed in the face if i wear the hat and the headphones. Let's see. What? I just don't like how it
Starting point is 00:20:48 looks. But I'll wear them just to prove how pro bar stool I am. Ew! Dude, blur out his head. Wait, that looks... Blur his head. For some reason, your face looks deformed now. Yeah. Oh, my God. Look at it. Frank loves it.
Starting point is 00:21:04 Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. Oh, my God. Look at it. Frank loves it. Whose fleece was whitest? No. Frank, how's the new place? New place is going well. It looks great. Still got a few things to unpack. I got to get my baseball cards and stuff organized a little bit better.
Starting point is 00:21:24 They're just basically jammed in a closet right now have you met your neighbors met a few of them never really talked to any of them yet well doug doug's right yeah yeah well doug's yeah doug's neighbor well he's on the fifth floor you're on the second i don't think is that does that count is that public yeah yes what units complex units complex that's pretty sweet yes yes it's it's uh how many people live in your building uh it's pretty sweet. Yes, yes. It's it's it's. How many people live in your building? It's pretty significant. There's like. Let me see.
Starting point is 00:21:53 There's probably about 30 units on every floor to 30 units. Yes. On every floor. Yes. Holy shit. That's a lot of units. So it's probably about 120. And there's another building that's about to open up next door. That's not completed in
Starting point is 00:22:05 construction yet all units in that building too probably about the same so there are a lot of people yeah who has the hangout apartment you or doug's uh ducks i have the uh probably the hangout apartment i have a lounge on my floor too oh let's go i have a lounge on my floor where uh there's an indoor-outdoor lounge. I don't know if they're cooked up yet, but there's going to be grills. That's awesome, man. There's going to be a bocce court. What?
Starting point is 00:22:35 You live in an all-inclusive resort? What's going on here? Looks like hedonism, too. They have a ping-pong table on the outdoor grill, although right now it's a little chilly to go out there. Frank, I'll come play bocce with you. You love bocce. I do. I wouldn't invite you.
Starting point is 00:22:50 I have a bocce set. If he wants to invite me, I have a bocce set. And the coup de grace, there's also a billiards table. No shit. You got to get your own stick. I'd like to play billiards someday. Frank, does it have a shower in unit? Oh, yes, it does.
Starting point is 00:23:05 It has a very nice shower. And get this, the shower, the temperature actually stays a consistent temperature. You know, my previous apartment, I would want like a kind of a lukewarm shower, and it would alternate between cold and hot. That's good for circulation. Some people pay for that. So, like, I'll turn it on, and then it'll be really hot, and I'll be like, ah! And then all of a sudden, I try to turn it down a little bit, and it was like, ooh!
Starting point is 00:23:34 And then, ah! So it alternated between cold and hot. I had no idea you were making in-shower unit money. Good for you. Yeah. At least somebody is here. Even better than that, I have a dishwasher. I've used a dishwasher
Starting point is 00:23:47 for the first time. I've never used a dishwasher before. The belch. I also have a washer and dryer system, so no more laundromats. I like laundromats. I hate laundromats. I hate laundromats. Yeah, what do you do there?
Starting point is 00:24:03 You sit there and you watch your clothes go spinning around for 45 minutes. Meanwhile, someone's using up eight machines, so there's only one machine for you. So that means it's going to take you now two hours to dry your clothes. Damn. I just like the concept, though. It's like a parking garage. It's like a set-it-and-forget-it business that doesn't need an attendant. It makes its own money, but nobody ever has to oversee it.
Starting point is 00:24:27 Have you been to Laundromat TikTok? No. Oh, it's great. In Madison, I don't know if they still have it, there was a Laundromat bar. You know, that's a great combo. You go, you show up, you drink, you do your laundry, and then you leave. That's a great combo. Because you forgot your laundry.
Starting point is 00:24:44 Do they have like arcade games? Laundromat. Maybe Frogger, Ping Pong. Not the laundromats I've seen. Most of the laundromats I see just have torture TV. They always have like a view on loop. Oh, torture TV. You know, the view is like having your fingernails.
Starting point is 00:24:58 You know that big Bette Midler guy? Bamboo on the fingernails. Yeah, it's like having your fingernails plucked out of your hand. What happened to the good days, the Connie Fosters of the world? How about Regis and Kathy? Regis alive? Regis is dead. Regis is dead.
Starting point is 00:25:12 Kathy Lee is still alive, right? You know, I got to say this. Morning show TVs across the border are just awful. Did you have something on hedonism too? Yeah, I did. Hedo Rick, so someone hit me up after our episode last week, said that his best friend was obsessed with Hedo
Starting point is 00:25:32 Rick and would go with him for Halloween every year. So when his best friend was getting married, he tracked down hedonism Rick, who doesn't have a cell phone or a home phone, but he found out where Hedo Rick works, and Hedo Rick's supervisor said the best way to get in contact with Hedo Rick
Starting point is 00:25:51 is the Hooters down the street because he goes there every night for dinner. Every night he goes for dinner. And he got Hedo Rick to leave a message for his buddies. The wild women, the wild women, the Rippin' and the Karen,, the Rippin' and the Taryn, the Rippin' and the Taryn. This is Hedo Rick in Arizona. Jay and Lindsey, I want to wish you a very wonderful wedding and a very happy and long life together. Rippin' Taryn, your honeymoon. Rippin' Taryn, your honeymoon.
Starting point is 00:26:23 I want to wish you the best from Heel Rick in Arizona. Rip and tear, baby. Rip and tear. We got to find him when we're out there. Oh, wow. Why would you want to rip or tear? Is that an ode to like hymen deterioration? I think so.
Starting point is 00:26:37 Nice. He said the rehearsal dinner, the groom's side loved it. The bride's side was horrified. Yeah. This is the reality of hedonism, Rick. It's all about the groom side loved it. The bride side was horrified. Yeah. The duality of hedonism Rick. It's all about the groom. I just really love the fact that hedonism Rick
Starting point is 00:26:50 just has a standing date every night at Hooters. Or that people love people love Hedo Rick like that. Yeah. There's Hedo files out there that just he just has the one video right?
Starting point is 00:27:00 Yeah. Yeah. And he just goes he lives his life doesn't have a cell phone every night goes and sits down at Hooters for dinner. That fascinates me. People who, like, go and eat out for a meal every day.
Starting point is 00:27:14 It's awesome. Yeah, it's like an elder. It will probably die out. No, I don't think so. No, what? No, I agree with you, the elderly part. But I think everyone, like, when I'm older, I think that would be something I would do. I sure would.
Starting point is 00:27:28 It stimulates the brain. And you don't want to cook. You don't want to cook. Some people just go their whole lives not cooking. You know, and you go to some diners. You could get something different every day. Cheesecake factory. You've got big menus.
Starting point is 00:27:43 You've got giant menus. I mean, yeah. I would love to go to a Cheesecake Factory every night. Yes, that would be fantastic. Eat something different until I ate my way through the menu. But by the time you reach the end, they're going to have new items. True. Do they add new items?
Starting point is 00:27:55 It's like the Golden Gate Bridge, always painting it. Yeah, it's never done. You should. That would be a good video, Big Cat. Touring the menu. For the rest of your life? That's a full-time job. And every time I go, I just fill up on the bread and never get to eat it again.
Starting point is 00:28:10 All right, maybe next time. Tune in tomorrow. I'm going to try not to eat three loaves of this brown bread. What's that place? Texas Longhorn? Roadhouse? Texas Roadhouse. Texas Roadhouse, yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:21 Or just Longhorn. Longhorn Roadhouse. Longhorn Steakhouse. Or the Longhorn. That's where it's at. They have those, that honey bread. Or just Longhorn. Or Longhorn Roadhouse. Longhorn Steakhouse. Or the Longhorn. That's where it's at. They have those dead, dead honey bread. Yeah, honey wheat. I got a bone to pick with KB, no swag.
Starting point is 00:28:32 Oh, please wait. Hold on. This bone was brought to you by our friends at Muggsy. Muggsy's most comfortable men's jeans on the planet built with proprietary stretch denim. These jeans look stylish but feel like you're wearing sweatpants. The same dudes that brought us the world's most comfortable jeans are also your one-stop shop for Chino shorts, tees, and
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Starting point is 00:29:07 You've got a lot of compliments on those, too. The light ones? Yeah. Hell yeah, Frank. They're good for any season. Okay, so Bone away. KB No Swag stood me up last night. Watch it, Chrissy.
Starting point is 00:29:22 At Radio City Music Hall. You're speaking out of turn. No, I didn't. No, I Radio City Music Hall. You're speaking out of turn. No, I didn't. No, I never. You ever. You didn't? Did you go to the Rockettes last night? Whoa.
Starting point is 00:29:31 After you had a standing invitation? We saw him invite you. I know that Roan went to the Rockettes because he came in fucking singing show tunes. I was. I was high-stepping like a goddamn Rockette. I'll show you the pictures as well. I was at the publicity live show. He was at the after party show you the pictures as well. I was at the publicity live show. He was at the after party.
Starting point is 00:29:48 No, you weren't. You were at the after party. Oh, you're one of those guys. Too cool to go to the show. Radio City Music Hall, brother. That's photo evidence of me being there yesterday. A beautiful picture. Wow.
Starting point is 00:30:00 Look at that. See? Look at that. Wait, let's see the time stamp. I'll be it. That is yesterday. Yesterday, 7.54 p.m. Wow. right before the 8 o'clock Rockette show. And KB No Swag was nowhere to be found.
Starting point is 00:30:12 Well, I stood out front for however long waiting for KB No Swag. The holiday spectacular. The holiday spectacular. Yes, Frank. Yes. That's a New York tradition. It's a tradition. And I thought that since KB is a relatively new New Yorker, that we would go together, and you didn't come.
Starting point is 00:30:30 You were just standing online waiting for me? Yes, I was standing online. Just another American online. We can't let that slide. Beef cam sponsored by Mugsy. Yeah, bro. You look massive. Yeah, you have a giant dick today, brother.
Starting point is 00:30:43 Oh, shit. Shoulders as well. Do you think the Rockettes back in the day was like essentially... Porn. Porn, yeah. It was like dude's Sports Illustrated edition or the... It was, yeah. Only way to see leg is to kick up that high.
Starting point is 00:30:59 It's like every year it's like, I can't wait to take my kids and my wife to this so I can just stare at these women and then have something for my spank bank. It's man's greatest trick, convincing women to like the Rockettes. Yeah. Yes, it was. There was more men there last night by far.
Starting point is 00:31:14 Oh. But old men. Yeah, who don't have access to the internet. You could tell, and they were just. Their boobs? No. Oh. It's all legs.
Starting point is 00:31:23 It's more legs. It's all legs. Very leggy. Have they gotten rid of the height restriction, or are they all the same height still? No. It's all legs. It's more legs. It's very leggy. Have they gotten rid of the height restriction, or are they all the same height still? No, they have. It's like the fucking Rockies. The fucking Peaks Valley. What happened to this fucking country?
Starting point is 00:31:33 All different heights. Just get another job. All different ethnicities. Unbelievable. What do we decide for our holiday spectacular? What's the holiday schedule? I think we each get five gifts, varying values, varying desirables. TJ's idea we should do, but Nick, I don't want you to have to change your whole schedule.
Starting point is 00:31:55 When is it? I was going to take a little vacation time, but fuck it. When are we talking about? You boys are my vacation. I'm not here the 17th. You are not here Friday the 17th? No. I'm going to be in Boise.
Starting point is 00:32:07 Idaho Bowl? Why don't we do it tomorrow? No, we have Rough and Rowdy. Fuck, let's do it Monday. I'm gone all week next week. Shit, brother. What about the 20th? I can do the 20th.
Starting point is 00:32:19 I'm out the 20th. Why? I'm home. What do you mean home? West Virginia. You don't love Barstool, dude. You're right. Anyways, catch me on the Tico 10 today.
Starting point is 00:32:29 You're spending an entire week in Boise, Idaho? Yeah, why are you there for the full week? We got to do some fucking pre-roll videos for this fucking bowl game, brother. And some stuff during the broadcast. We need to sprinkle in. Yeah. What was that, Steven? He's coughing?
Starting point is 00:32:46 Just did this. For what? Pre-roll videos. Oh. I've done some, too. That was an ad? Yeah. I mean, that was an ad.
Starting point is 00:32:55 Frank, is there anything Ron has to see in Idaho? Well, can we actually pull up Frank's last vignette from Idaho? Maybe we'll take a quick tour. Beaverdick Park. Beaverdick Park. The fucking Libs are trying to infest that state. Get a vignette from Idaho. They are not.
Starting point is 00:33:12 The Cali Libs are trying to take over Boise. They have no chance. They have no chance. They're going to fail hard. You can get a fucking latte in Montana now. Bullshit. What? All the celebs moved to Montana.
Starting point is 00:33:25 Mayer started that. Yep. But that shit's never going to happen to Boise. Boise is one of the last bastions of true American conservatism. It is starting to fucking happen. Are you going to stay out there for the Boise-Idaho Bowl? When is that? Kent State's playing in it.
Starting point is 00:33:39 Oh, no. I ain't watching Kent. No? No. I don't watch Mac schools that aren't in the Arizona Bowl. Solidarity, bro. Not this year, my dog. Sorry, bro.
Starting point is 00:33:49 Central Michigan, maybe. I'll watch them. And I just hope that San Diego State gets rocked. Agreed. Yes. I also hope that. I mean, UTSA, go Roadrunners. Why didn't you like San Diego State?
Starting point is 00:34:07 Roadrunner. They don't like us. CSAS, are you watching? Yeah. They don't like us. What did you just say? They don't like us. Who?
Starting point is 00:34:15 Roadrunners. This is why you don't like Barstool. I'm checked out. Yeah, you are checked out. You're replaying the whole entire conversation with Dave. So replay it out loud. Give us more nuggets. Give us more nuggets.
Starting point is 00:34:28 So he said, you don't like Barstool, do you? That's not what happened. Then what did he say? He said, you're not getting a raise. Pretty much. And you said, okay, boss. All right, boss man. He said, but you could get a raise if you stand here and say the Pledge of Allegiance
Starting point is 00:34:46 to Viva. And you said, no way. Yeah. I said, you couldn't make me do it if you held a gun up to my face. Wow. And then he did. I didn't do it. Wow. Hero. Called his bluff. It was a 20 minute meeting though. Yeah, it was long.
Starting point is 00:35:02 What else did you guys talk about? How did you lose right away and then there was 20 more minutes? Didn't you lead the show off saying it was quick? Did he run up the score on you? No, it wasn't quick. It was 20 minutes. Did he run up the score on you? Yeah. He just kept dunking on me over and over again.
Starting point is 00:35:18 What were some of the dunks? I don't feel comfortable saying them. What is it, like Putin, where you just let him score? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I could have got it back any time. You could have clapped back hard. Oh, you totally could have gotten him.
Starting point is 00:35:29 I pretended to take a call halfway through. Nice. Oh, yeah. Hold on. Hold on one second. I've got to wait. I've got to go to the store. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:35:38 What's your biggest regret right now? Most of the decisions I've made in my life. Did he know what you were up to? Like what you've been doing? No. He's like, you're on anus, right? No, he did. It was a fine meeting.
Starting point is 00:35:54 It really wasn't that crazy. I have no idea what to think. You wish you could have done some things differently. Yeah, not asked for the raise. Saved myself that embarrassment. Why is it embarrassing, though? Just feel like a goddamn fool. Why?
Starting point is 00:36:11 Let's do the dozen call to Dave. Ask him what's the average salary in Manhattan. I think I'm out on trivia. Don't you have to play live? Why do you let it defeat you like this? Because I just... What happened? It's out tonight at 7, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:36:30 No, not that one. I got a question wrong because I was called a friend. Jeff does a great job, and I actually was thinking about it more last night. Jeff deserves more credit for doing something that includes the entire company. Like, it's awesome. Personally, trivia is just like a no-win because I just feel stupid. I feel dumb.
Starting point is 00:36:48 You ever get one though? I don't get easy questions that I should know and I don't, it's more like, it's more like trivia is proving that my brain is melded. No one ever praises you for getting a question right. Right. They're just like, how did you not know that? And I'm like, well, now I feel bad about myself.
Starting point is 00:37:03 Or if you ever get a hard one and then it sticks with you for a couple days. No, I just don't get them. That was me when I got Macbeth. I've also quickly found out I have general knowledge about everything, but no specific knowledge about anything ever. That's the best way to be. Yeah, that's ideal.
Starting point is 00:37:21 That's trivia. But I don't actually have enough knowledge to get the questions right. That's the worst way to be. Oh, no. I have enough to be like, it's vaguely familiar to me. Every question is vaguely familiar to me. But there is going to be live trivia in Arizona. I'm excited for that.
Starting point is 00:37:42 I will. That will be fun. That will be fun. Again, it's awesome because it brings everyone together, which that's like an almost impossible feat to do. Six of us are playing in here. Yeah. How is that going to work?
Starting point is 00:37:54 I'm flying out to Arizona to play one trivia match then flying immediately back. Same day, right? Next morning. I actually don't think we're even letting you take your luggage off the flight. No, no, I'm not bringing luggage. You can get a toothbrush. You can have a toothbrush, but one of the kinds that puts the...
Starting point is 00:38:09 It automatically foams. So is that going to be broadcasted during the thing? During the Arizona Bowl. It's going to be opposite. Before what? It's a live show. It's like we're... If you come to the Arizona Bowl, there's a bunch of different experiences you can take part in.
Starting point is 00:38:24 Oh, that's cool. This is one of them. That's fun. Yeah, there's like bunch of different experiences you can take part in. Oh, that's cool. This is one of them. That's fun. Yeah, there's like a golf thing with Riggsie. I liked it. I'm flying out like 6 o'clock in the morning on the first. A lot of Riggsie in the meeting. I got to jump out of an airplane.
Starting point is 00:38:35 Oh, yeah. What? Yeah. What? A lot of Riggsie. What? In your meeting with Dave, there was a lot of Riggsie mentions. What's the crossover?
Starting point is 00:38:42 What do I have to look up to? Really? Yeah. Harvard. That's a lot of Riggs-y mentions. What's the crossover? What do they have to look up to? Really? Yeah. Harvard says a lot of merch. Yeah. Oh, that's what he said? You need to sell more merch? Pretty much, yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:52 Merch is the lifeblood of this company. Yeah. Should be able to sell more. Just make a t-shirt. We always used to have a joke whenever things were going tough. Just fucking make a t-shirt. I've had someone request me make a hat. I just don't know how to do it.
Starting point is 00:39:08 I think you just got to send something. I'll help you make it. So weave it. Do you have a sewing machine? Yeah, do you have a sewing machine? I had a sewing machine. It's in my storage unit. I broke it.
Starting point is 00:39:18 Okay, so you have one. You're sewing too hard? I guess. Was it a pedal pump? No, it was an electric one. I love the pedal pump. The needle broke. Just get a new needle.
Starting point is 00:39:30 We should actually make people sew their own merch to teach them. Sewing's awesome. Hard work. I sewed a pillow when I was in fifth grade. It was very fun. Was there a hole in it? I don't know. It was from scratch?
Starting point is 00:39:40 No, you should sell it. You should put it in the store. I know. How big is the pillow? That would be your raise. It's big. My mom still uses it. It's a Patriots pillow. should sell it. You should put it in the store. I know. How big is the pillow? That would be your raise. It's big. My mom still uses it. It's a Patriots pillow.
Starting point is 00:39:48 So sell it. Yeah. For a lot of money. You stitched the Patriots logo? No. It was Patriots patterned fabric. So you... Yeah, just the four corners of the fabric you stitched together.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Like Craig from Southern Charm. I was in fifth grade. True. Did you use a sewing machine? I did. A precocious young man. It was the one year I 5th grade True Did you use a sewing machine? I did A precocious young man It was the one year I went to private school
Starting point is 00:40:08 And we had a sewing class Fuck yes It was awesome That's what the fucking libs Want you to learn I got back into sewing Do you have the vignette, Zah? You got some
Starting point is 00:40:19 Okay, so this is So where's this? This is Idaho Where's this What's the address of this So I could It's this? This is Idaho. Where's this? What's the address of this so I could check this out? It's Chester, Idaho. Chester, Idaho is basically no man's land. Okay.
Starting point is 00:40:32 Is that an icicle? Wow. Oh. Oh, wow, that's very nice. That's beautiful, Frank. Wow. That's a great picture. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:40:40 Whose barn is that? That is my parents' garage. What? No, that parents' garage. What? No, that can't be. That's not a barn. Because I can tell by the door being open. It says Chester, Idaho, not Chicago. Well, it's ten times colder in Chester, Idaho.
Starting point is 00:40:55 Let me guarantee you that. Okay. Oh, what's this? Wasn't there a polar vortex in Chicago? Is this more snow mounds? Oh, that's a nice garage. In fact, that's attached to their house. The house is just like on the side of that.
Starting point is 00:41:07 So it's less garage, more house. Yeah. It's a little small area. That's cool. It's really nice. So what's this? Just the land. Mm-hmm.
Starting point is 00:41:17 And this? That's the same garage. What was the consistency of the snow? That garage is getting a lot of pictures. Do they have to plow themselves? Oh, little pupper. Wait, can we zoom in that picture? I'm gauging whether or not he deserves a boop.
Starting point is 00:41:33 Yeah, I'd like to see this. Yeah, that's what I was looking for. Frank, why were you dressed up like a nun? Or a pilgrim? That is a graduation photo. Would you graduate from the Mayflower? Nice. Oh, a graduation photo. Would you graduate from the Mayflower? Nice. Oh, there it is.
Starting point is 00:41:49 You're looking good, Frank. Back in the habit. Yes, it's graduation photos. Nice. Is that a close-up of the dog? You look like a judge. Oh, that's a boop. I'm booping it.
Starting point is 00:42:00 I'm booping it. That's a boop. 10 out of 10. Wood boop. Also boop. That low of a score, huh? I'm going 12 out of 10. Oh,op. 10 out of 10. Would boop. Also boop. That low of a score, huh? I'm going 12 out of 10. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:42:07 And I'm giving that must boop. Oh, it's a must boop. Oh, Frank. There you go. Looking good. You catch yourself off guard with that one? Yeah. Yeah, you're intuitively, yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:21 It's like you're looking at an equation that's never been written out. Frank's first time seeing a garage. What the fuck? I got on the wrong flight. That's Chester, Idaho, not too far from Rexburg. And now where's Rexburg not too far from? Rexburg is near Idaho Falls. And Idaho Falls is near? That's eastern Idaho.
Starting point is 00:42:48 Eastern Idaho. Housing which cities? That's the biggest city. Idaho Falls, Pocatello. Close to Boise? They have a whack ass flag, Frank. Idaho or Pocatello?
Starting point is 00:43:03 Oh my god. It's super messy. I mean, yeah. It has like dumb ass text on it. I've never seen the Pocatello flag. A lot of conflicting colors. But, uh, Rexburg. And the St. Anthony
Starting point is 00:43:17 sand dunes are out there. And it's not too far from the Yellowstone Kill Zone. Yeah, where murder is legal. I like how when you get farther west, like on the east coast, it's like all old English towns and stuff. And then you get out to the west and it's like some dude named Rex found that fucking city. Yeah, I'll take this. It's like Beaverdick.
Starting point is 00:43:39 Dibs, Beaverdick Park. Well, Beaverdick Park is in Rexburg. It is. Is it? Yeah. Yes. I got to meet this Rex guy. Yeah. No, I got to meet Beaverd Park. Well, Beaver Dick Park is Rexburg. It is. Is it? Yeah. Yes. I got to meet this Rex guy. No, I got to meet Beaver Dick.
Starting point is 00:43:48 Block or charge. 10,000 retweets, 75,000 likes. You've done it again, Rex. Some dude just fell off a ladder and broke his neck into 17 million pieces. You see the Christmas party he put out the other day? Oh, no. Timeline cleanse. What's his podcast about? No. off a ladder and broke his neck into 17 million pieces. Did he put out the other day? Timeline cleanse. What's his podcast about?
Starting point is 00:44:11 I don't know. Timeline cleanse. I'd listen to that podcast. Quickly do a timeline cleanse. Did you see the car that was on the lip of Niagara Falls yesterday? That thread? Everybody was celebrating when the guy pulled her out. They were like, nah, that was like a body.
Starting point is 00:44:26 She's dead. She's dead. Really? Yeah. But they waited too long in between tweets. Everybody was like, thank God.
Starting point is 00:44:31 This is great news. What she means? There was like somebody, some old woman drove her car into Niagara Falls and her car was like teetering on the lip.
Starting point is 00:44:40 But she died? She had already died. They think she had already died behind the wheel. Went right in. They used to have to meet. Oh, so she's dead. Long gone. And they all, But she had already died? They think she had already died behind the wheel. Went right in. They used to have the Maid of the Mist. Oh, so she's dead. Long gone.
Starting point is 00:44:49 And they all... Everyone was cheering as they saw the guy bring her out. Well, that's the old Maid of the Mist. The Maid of the Mist. The people... Are we going to show another dead body? Are we two for two this week? Dead bodies?
Starting point is 00:44:58 We don't need a dead body. Za. Za? Za? Loki morbid? He's a necro. He's got a little necro in him You gotta fill in the blanks
Starting point is 00:45:07 No you No you ignored You ignored the weird flag But as soon as you hear corpse You're on the case Can you find out Was Bob Dole's Was it open casket
Starting point is 00:45:16 Yeah let's find his Let's find his Quick peek at his dead ass body On it When you go to a 98 year old Like open casket funeral Can you say like
Starting point is 00:45:23 Oh they look good Yeah Better than I thought. They actually do. They do a good job. Do they look better than ever? They look better than they have. Should we call my mortician boy again?
Starting point is 00:45:32 You had a mortician guy. Yeah, remember we used to have a call to the YAC? That's right. That's right. Bob Dole is definitely, I mean, you know you had a good life when everyone's answer to, like, Bob Dole died. Like, oh, he's still alive? Jay thought he was dead for decades. Decades. That's when you know you had a good life when everyone's answer to it. Like, Bob Dole died. Like, oh, he's still alive? Jay thought he was dead for decades.
Starting point is 00:45:46 Decades. That's when you know you've done well. Was he on Entourage? Yes. He was on the episode with Gronk. Oh, yeah. They were talking about getting pussy. Didn't he just lose the presidential campaign because the way he said his own name?
Starting point is 00:46:02 That's all it took back then. Wasn't he saying his own name? He sweat too much on camera. That was what it was. Is that what it was? No, that was Nixon against Kennedy. The issue with him was he was stiff and old. Well, because he literally couldn't raise his arm
Starting point is 00:46:13 because of like injuries that he had in the war, right? Yeah, war injury, yeah. Yeah. Hero. Which is like something fucked up to make fun of, but people did it. They went for it. TJ, Rucker's going to win tonight?
Starting point is 00:46:27 Yeah. No. What if I go? The answer is definitely no. Well, I know one thing for sure. Rutgers is going to get their ass kicked on Sunday. Sunday. Sunday.
Starting point is 00:46:40 Seton Hall? NJIT? Seton Hall's a bunch of pussies. Oh, we got... Go Hall. NJIT. Seton Hall's a bunch of pussies. Oh, we got... Go Hall. Get the beef cam back. Seton Hall had the opportunity to open their top deck at the Prudential Center for the game,
Starting point is 00:46:51 and they decided not to because it would all be Rutgers fans. Yeah, well, that pissed me off because I would have gone if they opened a damn top deck. Yeah, so we're both pissed at Seton Hall. They got a good team? More like Schmeaton Hall. Oh! More like Butkers.
Starting point is 00:47:06 Oh. There's a team in Central Jersey always embarrasses every weekend. Oh, they keep losing. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:22 They're a big joke. Can't beat anyone. Won't make a ball. Rockers football. It's a big joke. Yeah. Oh.
Starting point is 00:47:38 Oh, that's a big clown. That's an unfair use of the clown. Oh, shit. You can't go full body. Hey, look, it's Rockers football. Oh, shit. You can't go full bias on this. Clown face has to be unbiased. TJ, can you clown face me for a second? I'd like to clown face myself for something. I was rude to a rapper named Lex Luthor yesterday.
Starting point is 00:48:00 I said that he stole somebody's catchphrase, and I was just joking, but he didn't actually steal the catchphrase. So clown face on me and an apology to Lex Luthor. Anyone else have anything they want to get off their chest? We actually have someone on the phone lines. Somebody that was involved in the Brandon incident at the arena last night. Is it a guy? Is it Brandon?
Starting point is 00:48:21 Okay. Put him on. Before you start speaking, lie. Who is this? Hello? Yeah, who is this? This is Ricky. This is the employee from UBS Arena last night.
Starting point is 00:48:33 All right. Thank you for your service. We need to vet this guy. We need to vet him to make sure it's not a crank. All right. So can I explain exactly what happened last night and how the real culprit in this is the person in my group chat, one of my boys, who posted the group chat. That's boring.
Starting point is 00:48:54 No, so wait, the guy that posted it. What? It'd be more fun if it was actually. Yeah, it wasn't him. Okay, that wasn't me. Okay. Also, okay, so here's what happened. I see Brandon. I work there. I'm a concession. State your claim. Okay, that wasn't me. Okay. Also, okay, so here's what happened. I see Brandon.
Starting point is 00:49:05 I work there. I'm a concession supervisor at your desk. I see Brandon buying a Coke at the counter or whatever. A girl's coming to take the top off. And then I am saying, oh, Brandon, blah, blah, blah. What's up? And then we take a picture, talk for a few seconds. The bartender says, wait, who is that?
Starting point is 00:49:21 She's not in the Barstool demo. And I was just like, oh, he's semi-famous. I had you at she. I was like, oh, he's some semi-'s not in the Barstool demo. And I was just like, oh, that's Shemi. I was like, oh, he's some semi-famous guy at Barstool. Brandon's at least socially distant, six feet away, turns around as fast as he could. He's like semi-famous. We laughed at it for two seconds. I'm like, bro, how many followers do you have?
Starting point is 00:49:42 He said, I have 200,000 followers. I look it up after. He rounds up. Oh. Ricky, I got a question for you. Let's put this Brandon stuff to bed. Your supervisor at concessions. Oh, that is bad.
Starting point is 00:49:57 He rounded up. He rounded up. There was a full round up there. I think he's at 189. It would be a shame if people started unfollowing him. 195.9. But why'd you only share the bad part of the interaction? Didn't you have a glowing conversation
Starting point is 00:50:10 beforehand? Well, I mean, we did. Like, we laughed about it for a sec. I mean... But you only texted your group chat that it sucks. I'm making small talk. Right. Well, Ricky, if I go up to one of your concession stands, I get myself a nice big Diet Coke.
Starting point is 00:50:27 I turn around. Whoops. Slips out of my hand. Falls on the ground. Spilled everywhere. What do you do? Oh, I'm going to buy you another. I'm going to get you another Diet Coke. Wow. Wait, but what if it's not me? It's not me. It's a random guy. Like me. Like Nick. Oh, okay. No, listen. I see anyone. I'm going to cop them, especially because we're a new arena.
Starting point is 00:50:48 We're trying to get all the kinks out of the armor. I'm trying to give the guests the best experience possible. That's me. That's hospitality. Kinks in the armor. Kinks in the armor. We're still a new arena. We're trying to get the soul of the arena. Got it. What if I have four of my five chicken fingers and then I realize that I don't like them?
Starting point is 00:51:05 Can I get a refund for them if I bring them back to you? Well, the first thing, Rowan, is you're only getting three chicken fingers, so that's the first part of it. What? Yeah, it's only three chicken fingers. Unless they look small. Okay, yeah. What if I put my dick in the bottom of a popcorn and I say, hey, Ricky, can you check this popcorn? There's a dick in there.
Starting point is 00:51:29 And you look in there and it's my dick. What do you do? I thought it was going to be your face in there when you said there was a dick in there. No, no, no. It's my dick. It's my dick. Hard. Then I'm going to have to say, you know what?
Starting point is 00:51:43 You can go over to guest services. They're going to help you out with that right over there. They're going to jerk you off. Sounds like it. I'll pass off the problem. Yeah. I'm thinking of a new solution. I'm not telling you no, but I'm pushing you away.
Starting point is 00:51:55 What do they do with the food at the end of the night? We put it in the compost bin. Usually my employees like to take it, but I'm like, listen, guys, this ain't happening tonight. Maybe one night I want a sushi stand, listen, guys, this ain't happening. Then I, maybe one night, I want a 50 cent, so we gotta throw that out, so sometimes I'll take home a little California loose, like two or three. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. You don't let your
Starting point is 00:52:12 employees take food home? Island Harvest is a big sponsor, so we'll let them eat chicken fingers there. We let them take home it sometimes if they're really like asking for it. Three or four. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:52:27 Why wouldn't you? I would assume that if you work at the concession stands, you get free hot dogs for life. Okay, so everyone gets a meal ticket before, but then like, then we're like kind of at the slippery slope. No, I disagree. Come on, Ricky. You never heard of the people that go to arenas and stadiums and take the food and bring it to the homeless?
Starting point is 00:52:51 I mean, that's kind of what we do in the country. Frank, they're agreeing with me. We're both Nets fans, so I love you, Frank. Wait, but come on, Ricky. You've got to let the people eat. What are we doing here? Big Cat, listen. We're letting them get meal tickets before.
Starting point is 00:53:05 They get chicken fingers before. They're making minimum wage, Big Cat. Let them live. No, I want every one of Ricky's people walking home with at least three hot dogs in their pocket. They'll be walking home. They walk home with a California roll once in a while. No! No one wants that.
Starting point is 00:53:21 Once in a while California roll. Gross. It's old sushi. Everyone wants that. Old sushi? No. Nobody wants invitation crab from Once in a while, California roll. Gross, it's old sushi. Everyone wants that. That's like $18. Old sushi, no. Nobody wants invitation crab from UBS. Come on, Ricky. Why don't you do what the Falcons do?
Starting point is 00:53:32 The Falcons have cheaper concessions, and they sell more because of it. Yeah. Yes, why don't you do that? Why don't you, yeah. Yeah, because you know what? I'm just going to go to the GM of Delaware North and be like, you know what, let's change all the prices. All right, good.
Starting point is 00:53:47 All right, call back in. Call back in when you get that done. That's perfect. Thank you, Ricky. No problem, guys. Also, by the way, Brandon wouldn't acknowledge that I tweeted back to you guys that I do have a Barstool tattoo. Still hates my gun.
Starting point is 00:54:00 Wait, what's the tattoo? What a jerk. What is the tattoo? Casey Smith's face? Barstool tattoo on the stool logo on my thigh. Got it. All right. You know what to say.
Starting point is 00:54:11 That's what Sass needs to do. Thank you, Ricky. Give us the sign off. Viva. Love you. Yeah. Ricky. Dude.
Starting point is 00:54:19 Ricky. Hit a Viva with me, bro. Arena guys are like carnies without sunburn. Oh, let's be nice. No, it's a tight ship. Hit a Viva with me, bro. Arena guys are like carnies without sunburn. Oh, let's be nice. No, it's a good community. Hit a Viva with me, bro. I like his policy. His policy of, you know, you drop your drink.
Starting point is 00:54:36 That's Virginia. Boom. Get a new one. Ricky's a man of the people in that respect. I'd like him to get some more hot dogs to his people. We need a VI, bro. That ain't it. That's the VA part of the Viva.
Starting point is 00:54:45 We need two people to do it. What are you doing? VA. That's AV. Frank's got, yeah, Frank's. Yeah, you got AV. That's the AV club. That's what I was on.
Starting point is 00:54:53 You told me I was wrong. I got an interview, so I got to roll. Fuck it. Let's all just roll then. Let's just go to your interview together. Yeah, let's go to the interview together But we don't have our Christmas plans yet We're interviewing the legend, Joey Harrington
Starting point is 00:55:09 Shut up Oh, really Very excited The duck He's no David Carr Alright, so what do we want to do our Christmas plans? TJ, you want to explain your idea? But wait, we don't have a date
Starting point is 00:55:24 We don't have a date What We don't have a date. What's the last day the office is open? Rose, the 22nd, I believe. That's a Wednesday. Roan, come back. I'll be here on the 22nd. I'm not going to be here. Come back the 17th.
Starting point is 00:55:36 I guess we've got to decide who we want more, Nick or Roan. You guys want Roan. It's closer to Christmas, too. Do it. Yes, Nick has known Kwanzaa's head bigger. Is everyone else here the 20th? That's a Monday. I have my ultrasound.
Starting point is 00:55:49 Oh, shit. Can we come with you? Can we come with you? That's a real gamble. No, don't come. I think we should plan an ultrasound party. I do want to do a gift exchange in some form. I'll give you some healthy lymph nodes.
Starting point is 00:56:06 Yeah. Transplant? Yeah. Well, that's a good time. Yeah. What are nodes? Are nodes like a palpable thing? No, you can't do this.
Starting point is 00:56:17 We don't have time. Can't Jerry Seinfeld our way out of this? What's the deal with nodes? What even are they? What's the deal with the nodes? What even are they? What's the deal with the lymph nodes? They just sit there and their nodes are
Starting point is 00:56:29 on a lymph. You know what? Maybe we'll do a Christmas special after the new year too. Because that's always everyone's always bummed after January.
Starting point is 00:56:37 No, let's do it before. Let's do a new year special. All right, fine. Because it is the finale of season six. So TJ's idea was a
Starting point is 00:56:43 gingerbread house competition for the draft order for the white elephant. Yeah. Yeah, that's perfect. fine because it is the finale of season six so tj's idea was a gingerbread house competition for the draft order for the white elephant yeah yeah that's perfect yeah combining all of our favorite things let's do it yeah all right we'll figure out a date we'll let everyone know can nick skype in maybe i'll skype in yeah yeah we'll figure out a date also can odakon yes no no doubt no yes no yes he never put me on Yes He never put me on He never put me on The fucking list
Starting point is 00:57:08 I saw the recent O'Daniacs list I dropped from like Three To like 46 Did you see his elf video Shocking I saw his elf video
Starting point is 00:57:17 He said I hit him up I was like What the fuck is this He's like I thought you'd never Talk to me again I was like
Starting point is 00:57:21 What You're Tyler O'Day He gaslit you He gaslit you. He gaslit me. You came crawling back. All right. Yeah, we'll figure it out, though.
Starting point is 00:57:30 We'll have something special for everyone. Real special. All right. See you everyone tomorrow. Bye. Bye. Thank you. Hell yeah.

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