The Yak - Mintzy Gave Us Arguably the Worst Food Review Ever | The Yak 3-23-23
Episode Date: March 23, 2023TJ's dad is NOT a loserYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, Poo-Jay, pull that up.
Hello.
It's the Yak presented by Roback.
I'm wearing my Roback joggers right now.
I'm wearing a hoodie.
Yeah, 20% off.
Code Yak.
The most comfortable clothes in the world.
Q-Zips, hoodies, polos, joggers.
Golf season coming up?
Rowback.
Weekend season coming up?
Rowback.
I wear these all the time.
Brilliant season.
Rowback.
Guy got on an elevator in my apartment wearing a Rowback hoodie.
Rowback.
He was going to the penthouse too.
Yeah, that's Rowback. Deal makers.
Penthouse season.
I wasn't even halfway up.
Yeah, Roback.
Yeah.
Best clothes out there.
You give him a nod to let him know that we know?
I give him the nod.
You're like, you're a Roback guy.
You're Robros.
You make deals.
You make things happen.
I hit the elevator stop button.
Oh.
Fucked him.
You bailed.
Nice.
What?
You mauled.
Fucked him.
Roback.com, promo code YAK.
Roback. 20% off your first purchase. The best clothes out there. Fuck them. Roback.com. Promo code YAK. Roback.
20% off your first purchase.
The best clothes out there.
All right.
Sorry there's no Stephen Che in the booth today, guys.
I bet you're disappointed.
Huge.
He'll be here later, but yeah.
Hopefully we'll have no technical difficulties like we did yesterday.
Or yesterday.
Kept going out.
Pete's a real fucking scumbag.
I hope he gets hit by a bus.
Real piece of shit.
Real bad guy.
Yeah.
Real bad guy.
Really shitty person.
Yeah, no, we cut out twice,
and we also, no one told us,
so we just did the show.
I'm going.
I apologize for that.
No, that's okay.
I actually prefer that, TJ.
I didn't want to derail the show
because we were still recording. Right. So, like, you can go watch the full show with no interruptions I actually prefer that, TJ. I didn't want to derail the show because we were still recording.
Right.
So you can go watch the full show with no interruptions.
I prefer it, too.
I hope you just say it every day.
You're like, guys, we weren't live for any of that.
So what's up, everyone?
We got our big WWE thing after this.
Yes.
Excited.
We're going to do the Nick's Wheel Meal lunch thing on Monday
When Roan is back
If this goes well
If this WWE thing goes well
I'm thinking about starting a wrestling podcast
What? That's a good idea
That's a damn good idea
That is a huge market we haven't tapped yet
Who's the top wrestling podcaster?
Conrad Thompson
Conrad Thompson?
I figured it would be a guy named Conrad.
A guy named Conrad's got you beat?
Conrad owns the game, buddy.
Conrad owns it.
What does he do that's different?
He probably got big guests.
He podcasts with a bunch of old wrestlers.
Oh.
Oh, but you did that.
Well, I did that and did great views, but, you know.
No.
No, I did.
I did.
You should walk into Erica's office right now and demand a comeback.
I'm not sure I'm in the position to walk into Erica's office right now.
You've got great leverage.
It's fair.
Want me to talk to her?
Would you?
I will.
Whoa, Sass.
New shoes.
Yeah, they're not new.
Holy shit.
Yeah, they are.
I would say, yeah, they are.
Holy shit, those are new.
These are the ones that I said.
Remember I said I got my old shoes in these at the same time and these have been sitting
in my room for two years now?
Those are still new.
They're old but unworn.
Old but unworn.
Never worn shoes are new shoes.
Those are new.
Yeah.
They're new to us.
I had to wear them because the bottom of my other shoes,
you know how I showed you guys how there's no padding?
Yeah.
It's ripping my socks.
I was like, I'm not going to go out and buy all new socks, so I'm
going to wear new shoes instead. I'm going to say it.
Less funny in those new shoes.
You've got to beat them up a little.
You don't look like... Converse
is very noticeable. I think he looks funnier.
I think you're damn funny,
Sam. It looks like the first day he showed up to New
York. The city hasn't beaten him down yet.
He's still got his sweatshirt on.
It's still sass. It is still sass.
Do you remember what you wore to your first day of work
at Barstool? It was a Bill sweatshirt.
You do? My underwear.
Yeah? Yeah. I wore
a sweatshirt
and it was really
hot out and I walked
from East Village to here
and it was like 95 and I remember I got
to the office and my shirt was like see-through.
I tried to take my sweatshirt off,
and I was ripping in sweat.
I showed up at 9 a.m.
Nobody told me.
Yeah.
Couldn't get in.
Bruce Pearl also.
Doesn't he have a sweaty photo, too?
Sean Miller's the all-time.
I think Bruce Pearl also has a sweaty photo.
There's never been a man that's sweat more
than Sean Miller in that tournament game.
White shirt was a choice.
White shirt was a terrible choice.
You got to know if you're a sweater like that.
Wait, what was this?
Coach of Arizona.
He's now coaching Xavier.
Oh, a coach.
Yeah.
It was in the first half, too.
TJ, if you can pull it up.
Pearl's got one.
Hold on.
I got to find Pearl's sweaty picture.
It's just always funny when a coach sweats.
Look at this.
This is the first half.
That's the first half. The score's 12-9. That's almost better funny when a coach sweats. Look at this. This is the first half. That's the first half.
The score's 12-9.
That's almost better than...
12-9.
That's hilarious.
Did he acknowledge it?
Like, he had to have acknowledged it.
I don't know if he did,
but that is a lot of sweat.
That's how I am on the wedding dance floor.
But that's at least the second half.
KB's sweatier in his second Instagram photo.
Oh.
Oh, yeah.
Wait, don't you only have two?
I guess three.
Yeah, Bruce Pearl's a big sweater, too.
Like a man that sweats.
There also was...
Oh, yeah.
Why does he sweat there?
He's sweating above his shoulders.
He's got upside-down armpits.
Did you pull up David Baker's sweat?
Because he sweat through a suit.
Hall of Fame guy?
Yeah.
It was a hot day in Canton and his suit had sweat marks.
That's hard to do.
The suit jacket.
Yeah, the suit jacket. That's impossible.
What are you talking about?
He had to have fallen in over the boat.
Yeah, I'm not remembering correctly.
I'm pretty sure I blogged.
That shit can't happen.
He's a giant of a man.
Yeah, but sweating through a suit.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, there it is.
Look.
He undid it.
He sweat through the suit.
It was a goddamn suit.
Look at him.
Look at his face.
Yeah, he's a sweater.
He's a top five sweater.
He's like a military symbol on his shirt.
He's a private.
Yeah.
That's hard to do, to sweat through your suit coat.
That's insane.
How uncomfortable does that have to be?
So, so uncomfortable. I just don't know if i could do that even like laying out in the sun sauna yeah
you know it's embarrassing look at kyle kyle
oh my god that air guitar you're going yeah i think i claimed to do ecstasy, but I sure didn't. You were just sweating so much.
Holy shit, Cade.
Oh, you were ripping it up.
I don't get it.
I was sober.
I don't know how I had that in me.
Was this a wedding reception?
We were all barefoot.
Look, not a single non-smile in the crowd.
Everyone's excited.
510 weeks ago.
That's so many weeks. remember i was that's like almost 10 years that's it no it's more five 510 13 years no no 56 weeks in a year
52 52 oh wow i'm tapping that's right yeah it wasn't 10 years ago. Oh, I posted that three years after it happened.
Yeah, you posted it five.
I don't think I've seen a 500.
That was a throwback.
That was a throwback Thursday.
When did we go to 52 weeks?
When did we take winters?
No, we didn't.
It's always been 52.
But they changed the schedule.
Yeah, they're changing it all the time.
They added a week in the NFL season.
That would be cool if they just took a month out of winter. They're changing it all the time. Yeah, they added a week in the NFL season. That would be cool if they just took a month out of winter.
They're changing the season.
Do you see the perfect proposed calendar that would make everything the same?
No.
Explain it.
I don't know how to explain it.
Please explain it.
It was like every first of the month is the same day.
Oh, I love that.
It's more or less days.
I think it's 10 days.
How was it the calendar made perfect the first time?
Weeks.
Yeah, like there's nothing better than the first of the month being a Monday.
It's like fresh start on everything.
There's better things than that.
No, that's the best thing in the world.
The best thing in the entire world.
There's better things than that.
Better than steak and blowjobs.
Oh.
You're right.
Better than giving them.
Did you see the map that made all the states a perfect square?
They proposed that.
I want to see that, too.
I'd like to see that as well.
How would you make Florida a square?
That would just be taking land away from a lot of states.
Other states, yeah.
We've done that before.
It's true.
You want us to go back and Louisiana purchase?
We can.
How much was it?
Like $5 million?
Yeah.
Big Cat could have
all of Louisiana.
The whole thing.
Big Cat, come on,
buy the West.
Take it all.
Didn't we do the
comparison to what it
would be now and it
still wasn't a lot of
money?
Yeah, it wasn't that
much money.
Well, inflation now.
Thanks, bud.
Joker. I can always tell when tommy has talked to his grandmother or his relatives back home because the other night i walked into the room and he just said
dad did biden steal the election oh i'm like i'm like no i i doubt it tommy and i had to explain
that tommy will like in in like 15 years he'd be like wait
i was alive on january 6th and i wasn't there yeah oh fuck my dad sucks yeah working on it
and he was there so politics aside he would have crushed it there yeah he would have climbed those
walls yeah politics aside it seemed like a pretty fun time yeah yeah adventure. Let's go storm this. Yeah.
Storming things does seem fun. Those guys got like a crazy sentence, didn't they?
Well, I think they all-
They were charged as like terrorists.
Yeah, and they all didn't think that like anyone would be able to figure it out, and
they all just-
All their cell phones were on.
Like hired photographers.
Yeah, there was just photographers everywhere.
It's like, yep, that guy, that guy, that guy.
All the gays were thirsting over that guy that was wearing the bear skin.
Bear skin guy.
One guy got a life sentence, the guy that was the happiest.
Oh, yeah.
They all got fucked, I think, when they went to fly home.
And they went to the airports, and I think they just got arrested at the airport.
The videos of them just chilling in the chambers was odd.
Yeah, they were just like...
They were calm. What are you going to do today? Well, we're just going to go kill Mike Pence. chilling in like the chambers it's always odd yeah they were just like it was just so they were
calm what are you gonna do today well we're just gonna go kill mike pence what else what else is
there to do it's so funny can i talk to tj yeah tj what uh do you know that your dad sends me a dm
every day oh jesus christ oh dad sends me a dm ever ever since i've been going through my thing he
sends me a dm every day for for i guess spiritual uplifting but he's been sending me nothing but
quotes from sun sue's art of war oh yes read some if your opponent is of choleric temperament seek
to irritate him sun sue that's what he sent me today he is so bored the general that hearkens
to my counsel and acts upon it will conquer.
Let such a one be retained in command.
Sun Tzu.
Your dad sends me that every day.
I love your dad.
He's my favorite person.
But why is he doing this?
I don't know.
Do you not appreciate that sort of thing?
No, I do appreciate it.
But every day it's hard. It's hard to get pumped up by a loser, though.
No, well.
You'd think a guy who knows Sun Tzu
back-to-back would win something.
I'll tell you what, he's never ever told
me a Sun Tzu Art of War quote.
Well, you've never fucked up this big.
I guess so, you're right. That's true.
Steven's here.
Ads, more like subtracts for you, Brandon.
Steven, are you okay? Everything good?
Yeah, nightmare morning, but good. You said you were going to be 20 minutes late. Yeah, made it. Everything you okay? Everything good? Yeah, nightmare morning, but good.
You said you were going to be 20 minutes late.
Yeah, made it.
Everything's okay?
Yeah.
We were getting a new fridge this morning.
Complications.
What happened?
Daughter's sick.
Bunch of stuff.
Complications?
What?
Were there fridges and going to make it?
Sit you a stove?
No.
We have built-in fridges so that they're a very specific size you
can't get like a regular fridge that's like fit squarely into the wall fancy and they pulled it
away and they said there was a bunch of mold there oh so we've been to the club brother
so it wasn't mold actually but it messed up our delivery because they couldn't put it in with that
what was what yeah i don't know um but the
guy was like yeah he's like another guy later was like yeah it's humbled luckily my uncle saved the
day he's uh he lives town over his general contractor and he like i had to go get bleach
and then he like got it off and then he's like yeah this is totally fine a real man had to come
in yeah honestly yes it is great having like is great knowing a mechanic or a general contractor and just being like, come fix this.
Talk their language.
I got none.
I have no fellas.
No uncles?
No uncles.
Yeah, the delivery guy was like, you're going to have to cut this wall out.
I was like, how do I do that?
That seems a lot.
Yeah.
I got rear-ended this morning.
I totally forgot.
Yeah.
And then, but...
Are you okay?
Yeah.
But then there's, like, a little scratch on my bumper,
and then the guy was like, I'll just sell you the money.
I was like, well, just give me your ID,
and I'm not going to do anything.
What do I do?
Yeah.
It probably is, like like a couple hundred bucks,
and then I have to contact them and everything.
Was it bad or no?
No, it was low speed.
Low speed.
Isn't there, is it like a Jeep where if you hit somewhere on the tire in the back,
it completely destroys the car?
I don't know about that.
My Jeep got rear-ended when I was living in
Columbus and it looked fine and I just
we let each other go.
Her car was fucked up. Mine wasn't. It was her fault.
And then like two weeks later I had a bent
axle from it. I didn't even know.
It cost me like $3,000.
I got this guy's information. I just
know myself.
Nah. Not worth it.
I did the look. Brandonon was that you were che who
fucked up horribly and broke that uber driver's door oh that was great
uber driver's door and it just smashed that's insane did another car come flying by yes
right out here in front of the front of the office uh he stopped and i opened my door and the door
it just it guy. Just come off?
Yeah.
Was it your first day as a city boy?
No, I had been here a while.
I was coming in on Sundays for NFL season, and the same Uber driver,
his name was Chin, and he lives a couple of streets over from me in New Jersey.
He would pick me up every Sunday at 930 and take me here,
and that was the end of our relationship.
He did not enjoy that.
Who pays for it?
I gave him.
I want you to give him.
I was not.
I was a passenger.
I was not liable for it.
It's your fault.
But it was his fault for parking.
But his insurance took care of it.
He's fine.
I gave him a couple hundred dollars out of my wallet.
Everything is good.
At first, there was the driver of the other car and my driver were mad at each other,
and they were doing this, and eventually you could just feel it when they started to come
to a common ground, and they both turned and looked at me.
Oh, man.
They're like, this guy.
Yeah.
It was his fault all along yeah the cash i if he had said venmo i probably would have been like sure
but i don't know is that was a crazy thing yeah i don't have zell so i was just like forget it dude
he's i'm gonna let him though you know what i'm gonna do is i'm not gonna i'm not gonna
text him for a while so he thinks he's in the clear any day and maybe i'll be like hey taking the car to the And maybe I'll be like, hey, taking the car to the mechanic.
In two weeks, I'll be like, taking the car to the mechanic, let you know, and then just never text him.
Never anything, yeah.
That's actually a good payment.
I've told you guys the story about when my buddy hit someone, right?
When I was in the car with him.
I think this was like a while ago.
Yeah, we hit a person.
In Colorado, right?
The dude, we backed into into him i didn't back
into him my friend did okay and uh and the dude like got the wind knocked out of him went down
got up and was like oh no i'm fine yeah just biked off i think it's no information he's like
i've gotten hit a couple times yeah this happens i think it's just one of those things that if
if like the quick like look of the car, the person,
you're like, what are we going to do?
We're going to sit here and do the whole-
Kind of in it together at that point.
Yeah, like, what are we going to call the cops?
I thought the guy died, and I was like, the entire trajectory of all of our lives is changing
right now.
You would have murdered someone.
Yeah, but you were just an accessory.
He popped up, and he went to the gym.
He was like, I'm going to the gym.
And then he was like, hopefully I can get some.
He was like an old guy.
He was an old dude and he was like, hopefully I can get some sympathy sex from my wife tonight.
Oh, no.
He was looking to get hit.
Are we not going to talk about.
Corey's just sitting there.
We got a heads up about it.
Oh, we did?
Yeah. That guy sounded sass the way you explained it. We used to this. Oh, we did? Yeah.
That guy sounded sass.
The way you explained it, it sounds like he tries to get hit.
He might have jumped in front of me.
Do you have sex with his wife?
Yeah.
It's like the only way my wife will ever have sex with me is if I get hit by a car.
He did sit there for a while and be like, I just got to sit here for a second and make
sure I don't just get paralyzed out of nowhere.
He said that?
This guy has like five quotes.
This guy rules.
It was like my buddy, it was a total like he could have sued the fuck out of my friend.
Like it was crazy.
Like he, we were going to the driving range and he took a wrong turn.
Like it was like a split in the road.
And so he was like, there was no cars on the street.
So he's like, all right, I'm going to go reverse and then go back.
And he goes in reverse and the dude is crossing the street and he just reverses right into him.
On his bike?
Yeah.
Did his bike get fucked up?
No, I don't think so.
Damn.
Yeah, this guy.
It was like best case scenario.
Yeah.
You guys had a bunch of guns in the car too.
We had a bunch of guns.
We were all hammered too, which was bad.
Yeah, yeah.
That's not good.
It was like 10 a.m.
Yeah, it changes the trajectory of your day.
It really does.
That was why I basically was like, I'm not going to do anything.
I don't want this to take away my day.
Yeah.
I got a lot of shit I got to do today.
I'm not going to sit here and do the whole song and dance.
Almost getting in an accident really fucks up the rest of the drive.
Oh, yeah.
Especially when you're having a good drive, listening to some music.
Dude, the way cars are though now, like my car, Brandon's car, if you're backing up and
someone walks within 10 feet of it, it will slam on the brakes.
So I think I hit someone all the time.
This was like a 2000 RAV4.
Yeah, those are built to hit people.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Isn't that also the
plot of I Know What
You Did Last Summer?
Do they run over
somebody?
Yeah.
I think so.
Did you steal this?
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
When you fell off the
bridge?
During your safari?
Safari crash?
No, I've told this
story on one of our
cruising exotica.
No, I told this story on one of our first Son of a Boy dads.
Sass, you remember when you fell down that pipe and started to jump on mushrooms?
And I got really big?
Have you all seen Mincy eat the crab yet?
I saw him ding the crab on the umbrella.
Wait, what?
I've seen him try to open the crab.
Mincy video dropped?
I don't know when it was.
What do you word at that?
The way he tried to...
He bit into a crab.
The way he tried to open the crab.
I would like to see this.
Everybody was saying he ate the guts.
I'm not a crab eater.
That's poopy.
There's a way to open the crab, and he didn't know.
It's worse than the unboxing video, even though it won't go as mega viral.
There's no way. Are you saying he didn't traditionally snap it, snap the leg?
I'm telling you that there was a crab that he's trying to eat,
and he didn't know how to get into it.
He cut it in half like it were a grilled cheese sandwich and went to town.
Let's see.
Crab review, because Bevy's Seafood is freaking awesome.
They send us out tons of crawfish, and he sent out crab,
which you don't usually see as much in the movie.
Wait a minute.
How far into the video are we?
I'm going to throw up if you can't see.
We need to see him.
When he grabs the crab,
he just dings it off the umbrella and goes,
Oops.
I didn't know that.
Oops.
Play it again.
That was damn good.
Oops.
What a ding, too.
It's like a fake noise.
Like when the guy hits the propeller jumping off the Titanic.
So he's not supposed to eat all of it?
There's like shit in it?
The intestines full of crab poopy are
in the middle of it.
Oh, God.
I'm assuming he eats it.
Also, Alex Bennett is in this video, but never mentioned it.
Let's crack it right there in the middle.
See, I don't know.
Not like this.
I think we're doing okay.
Just rip.
Oh, God.
Yeah, that's great.
Oh. I think we're doing okay. Just rip. Oh, God. Yeah, that's great. Taste that.
Oh.
So that's just shit.
I mean, shit.
And then he says spicy.
If you see yellow, it's crab shit.
He's eating straight yellow.
I'm starting to fall off the wagon here, guys.
He looks like the yolk of an egg.
How does he not know this?
Doesn't he eat seafood all the time?
He's just.
Hey, it tastes pretty damn good. I'm sure I'm butchering this and Baltimore friends are mortified right now. Doesn't he eat seafood all the time? He's just...
Eating it like a burger.
I love his reviews because they're all good. It might be.
I don't know. You decide.
I like the citrus again,
which he loves.
Reviewing food is hard. There's really not much else
you can say.
I never know what to do.
Doing it in my head is hard.
You need the ball scale.
That's why when Roan always brings me on those Neighborhood Eats things,
I'm like, dude, I don't know what you want me to say.
It's all pretty good.
This is good.
It's also like I seek out superfood reviews.
Ever watch a food review and you're like, I got to try that?
Look how –
Yeah, I actually do.
I don't.
Yeah, that works for me.
I did just see one.
There's this place in Hoboken where you get this bag
and there's a bone sticking out of the top
and then you pull the bone out and you open it
and it's like a cheesesteak.
I don't know what kind of meat it is
that you pulled the meat off the bone.
I don't know.
But you're not trusting the person's palate.
You're just like, that looked cool.
It looked cool.
It's the first time in a while that I've been like,
I'm going to make this.
All food reviews can be photos.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'll try a good piece of this.
Yeah, this guy.
Oh, I actually do want this.
Fuck you.
Yeah, look at that.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, you're right.
Yep.
I want that.
Is this the Devour Cup?
It is.
Love for it to mince.
He didn't make a cameo in this.
Oops.
He just hits someone with the bone, throws it behind him in a little kids walking by.
That was perfect.
That was a perfect thing. That was a real good thing.
Great thing.
Oops.
Oops.
No one stopped him.
What do you mean?
You can't stop Mincy.
No one there knew that he was eating the guts of the crab?
Mincy is literally the meme, like, hold on, let him cook.
I mean, I think you can still eat that shit.
You can eat it, but.
It's not too gross.
Yeah.
This ain't content, brother.
Man.
The man is the best.
Oh, no.
Oh, we got a bonk.
The bobblehead all over again.
High noon
High noon
Hard seltzer with real vodka
Real juice and sparkling water
It's actually made with vodka
Not with malt like other hard seltzers
High noon hard seltzer is a perfect
Refreshing drink for a hot day
They now have big cans
700 milliliters, peach and
pineapple available.
I'm a peach guy. Only 100
calories, gluten-free and no added sugar.
High Noon full-time flavors are pineapple, black
cherry, watermelon, grapefruit, lime,
peach, mango, passion fruit
and lemon. Limited edition flavors
are pear and cranberry in the tailgate
pack and kiwi and guava in the pool
pack. Look for them on Drizzly or at your local convenience or liquor store or visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you.
It is officially spring, right?
Wasn't that the 21st?
Yeah, the other day.
That is nothing better than that first spring day when everyone's like got that extra pep in their step.
That's when you really want to drink.
Yes, that's when you want to hide it.
Usually when I'm walking home from work.
It's hot out.
Perfect.
The first day that people get out on their porches.
Everyone's out, the college porch day.
Sun dress.
I've got to find somebody with a stoop.
I want to drink.
Stoop.
I've got no stoop homies.
Yeah, you need to be a stoop guy.
I'm going to have a couple high noons tonight, I think.
There you go.
Highnoonspirits.com or get it in
Drizzly. High noon.
Where are you going? I'm going to a comedy show tonight.
Are you not performing
on it? Doing comedy? No. Whose show?
I'm going to, well, I have a show tonight as well.
But then after that, I'm going to
Noel Miller. Yeah.
He's doing Town Hall
and Sean Gardini's opening for him.
Nice.
So I'm going to go hang out there and watch.
Are you going to go in the green room?
Probably, yeah.
Nice.
Yeah, I'm excited.
It's going to be fun.
That's sick.
Yeah.
I've never seen his stand-up, and I'm excited to see it.
He didn't start as a stand-up, right?
No, I think he's actually been doing stand-up for a really long time. Okay.
Nice try, Dan.
Whoops.
That's not like what he got big from.
He got big from YouTube. Yeah, with Cody, right? He's been doing stand try, Dan. Whoops. That's not like what he got big from. He got big from YouTube.
Yeah, with Cody, right?
He's been doing stand-up forever.
We've had him on,
I think we had him on PMT.
Yeah, he's really fucking funny.
Very good dude.
I actually met him when I was like 17.
And?
He's a really nice guy.
Cool.
He's like the first person I met
from like online.
How'd you meet him?
I went to his show in maine but it wasn't
stand-up it was like a live podcast with cody yeah and you went and met him after yeah that's sick
yeah it was cool you got a picture probably this is like like uh when uh bill clinton took a picture
with jfk no i had a picture on my instagram. Yeah, this is the... I was really young. Someday we'll look back
and be like, oh my God.
When are you going to go out to LA
and do some shows?
I don't know.
I mean, it's just about
whenever I get booked.
I'm going to San Francisco
with Francis.
That'll be fun.
Ooh.
Yeah.
And Cobbs.
What's Cobbs?
Cobbs Comedy Club.
It's a pretty big room.
How big?
Like 400.
Yeesh.
Big room.
Sell that shit out.
We'll see.
Oh, look at that.
Absolutely insane night.
Whoops.
That was 207 weeks ago.
Yeah.
It looks pretty insane, dude.
That looks fucking insane.
In terms of insane nights,
that's probably the most
insane night I've ever seen.
Also is.
I drove pretty far for that.
You know,
I'll do in white power there.
That was before it was white power.
Yeah.
That's you look at it and you get
started.
Yeah.
Punch,
punch,
punch.
That really was.
They did co-op.
Started.
It's like they ruined the game.
Yeah.
It's underneath.
Yeah.
Punch them.
No, like, like, you should just take to a mean common hand game. Yeah, it's underneath you. Punch them. No, like,
groups should just take
common hand signals.
Yeah.
The thumbs up should be snagged by...
What are you guys?
Swalkers.
Okay.
It does gotta suck,
like, creating something
and having, like,
white power just take it over.
Yeah.
Did white power take it over
when...
Say the white power took it over.
People said that white power
took it over, and then they did.
Then they did.
It started off as a joke.
Remember when Milk had a moment where it was about to be canceled?
Yeah.
Wait, what?
They were like, oh, only Proud Boys are drinking milk.
Yeah.
Wait, but I like milk.
Then people were posting videos.
Oh, I'm about that.
Shucking gallons of milk.
Stop drinking milk.
You did?
I don't like when people do it.
When people drink milk?
Yeah, yeah.
That was actually like
right around
it's a flaw of mine
it just bothers me
what do you mean
when someone like
orders a glass of milk
or just drinks it
with a meal
I can't drink it plain
anymore
but I always
pour it on my ice cream
and I eat it
you pour milk
on your ice cream?
that's weirder
than drinking it plain
I can't drink it plain
but I'll put it on cereal
on ice cream what do you mean why it on cereal, on ice cream.
What do you mean?
Why do you need milk on ice cream?
I even pour it on cake sometimes.
What do you mean you pour it on ice cream?
Cake soup is good.
Hold on.
Cake in a bowl.
Cake with milk.
Yes.
In a bowl with milk.
It's really good.
That actually sounds repulsive.
We got to go back to this ice cream thing.
How so?
Ice cream already has everything you need from milk.
Put a little milk on your ice cream tonight is all I'm saying. I think milk and ice cream sounds. How so? Uh-uh. Ice cream already has everything you need for milk. Put a little milk
on your ice cream tonight
is all I'm saying.
Oh.
I think milk and ice cream
sounds good.
Cake and milk does not.
Cake and milk is great.
Why wouldn't it be good?
Because it's cake and milk.
Because it's cake and milk.
You're having soggy cake.
Yeah.
I like soggy cake.
Oh, you don't?
Do I not?
Maybe I don't.
I don't know.
I don't know if I've ever
done this, Kate.
It's like pouring a glass of OJ into like an orange.
Yeah.
Disgusting.
That would be good, yeah.
It's like putting water in ice cubes.
When the ice cream gets melty and you scrape the melty part off the bowl and that's like such a good bite.
Yeah.
It makes that so much easier.
It makes like it's melty and.
It's like watered down ice cream.
No, it's just like.
Melted ice cream. Except of all the good parts. No, it's just like. Melted ice cream.
It's a strip of all the good parts.
No, melted.
I take my ice cream and I.
Yeah.
Ice cream soup is good.
Until it becomes a soup.
Yeah, that's what.
It's easier ice cream.
That's ice cream.
That's not milk.
Milk and ice cream are different.
Milk speeds up the process, I think.
Yeah, it speeds up the process.
Is it always just white milk?
Do you do chocolate milk on chocolate ice cream?
No, no, just white.
What about chocolate milk with chocolate ice cream?
Yeah.
I should.
I should try that. Well, chocolate. I'll start cream? Yeah. I should. I should try that.
Well, chocolate.
I'll start.
I'll get on that.
I'll do that tonight.
Okay.
No, you won't.
You're going to stop and get chocolate milk just for this?
Maybe.
I've been drinking a lot of Yoo-Hoo lately.
Knowing Kate, yes, she probably will do that.
Yeah, I probably would.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Nothing else going on.
Milk and ice cream.
You've been drinking a lot of Yoo-Hoo lately?
Yeah.
Are you just a child again?
Probably.
It is kind of funny. Yoo-Hoo's for cool adults. It's branded. It's one of thehoo lately. Yeah. Are you just a child again? Probably. It is kind of funny. Yoohoo's for cool adults.
It's branded.
It's one of the coolest brands.
Yeah, it is.
Yoohoo?
Isn't it?
Isn't it?
I think it's just water and chocolate syrup.
That's not milk.
It's not milk.
That's crazy.
What?
It's chocolate drink.
It says it on top.
I don't think there's any dairy in it.
If you do that with water and chocolate syrup, it'll taste identical.
Holy shit.
It's really thin.
That's what someone said.
I didn't know that.
Me neither.
It's the blue writing on top of the yellow label.
If you see a guy walking down the street drinking a Yoo-Hoo,
that's a cool guy.
I don't think so.
Plain Lays.
Plain Lays are the coolest dudes.
Rudy walking down the street with a Yoo-Hoo.
Plain Lays.
Someone eating Plain Lays so slowly.
A small bag of plain lays.
Big Cat tried to, he was furious.
I mean, plain lays is a psycho thing when you're going to get snacks for the car.
Oh, yeah.
You get a long drive and you got plain lays.
That's cool.
That is psycho.
I got plain lays.
I got plain Pringles.
You got two plains?
Yeah.
No pretzels.
I like that.
No Chex Mix.
No Twizzlers.
I think plain lays are good when you just want a little salt fix.
Nice and thin.
I think it was a fine-
A gallon bag of plain lays was a mistake.
That's all that's available.
Yeah.
It was a mistake because it gets all on your hand.
Right.
Pringles was not a mistake.
I love Pringles.
Pringles are great.
Pringles are fine.
Pringles are great.
Plain lays, nah.
Not for a road trip.
No, it's for a sandwich.
I don't eat a sandwich without chips.
Sandwiches.
Never ever eat a sandwich without chips.
I never did it for me.
Oh, my God.
I love it.
Crunch.
It changes the sandwich completely.
I don't need a crunch.
Oh, I live for the crunch.
Oh, it changes the sandwich.
Somebody needs a crunch, but the crunch enhances it.
Oh, no, no, no.
Yes.
I need a crunch.
Okay, he needs a crunch.
I need a crunch.
If I don't have a crunch, I ain't eating it. How about mashed no. I need a crunch. Okay, he needs a crunch. I need a crunch. If I don't have a crunch, I ain't eating it.
How about mashed potatoes?
I need a sandwich.
I need them a little toasted on the top so I can get a little crunch.
I live for the crunch.
My days are basically I wake up and search for a crunch.
You have to be one of the biggest crunch guys in the world.
Easily.
Because you could do just a turkey sandwich.
That's naive.
You could just be like.
Yeah, there's levels to this
who's the biggest i'm a bigger crunch guy yeah i just told you i live for the crunch i wake up in
the morning i'm like where's my next crunch i mean it's somebody who only enjoys specific textures
i don't like soft food there's bigger crunch guys than you no i would i'll go crunch guys who only
eat crunch i'm such a girl like soft food that'm such a crunch guy. You like soft food.
That's such a lie.
My favorite food is ice cream.
Name a soft.
Oh, shit.
Okay.
That's a dessert, but like a soup?
Donuts, coffee, and ice cream.
Get out of town.
All the donuts have a little crunch.
Get out of town.
You're a fraud.
Fuck.
You're a soft guy.
Soup.
I won't eat soup without crackers.
This has to be what it feels like when parents find drugs in
kids' rooms. What is this?
Yeah, what is this? It has no crunch.
Fuck. Ice cream.
No. Well, no, okay, alright.
No, no, no, no.
If I have my choice, I buy
ice cream cones from my own house.
True. So I am a crunch ice cream guy.
I don't like ice cream just in a bowl. And you go crazy on the toppings,
right? And I go crazy on the toppings.
I will
always have a box of ice cream
cones at my house.
Something about having an ice cream
cone at home is a little weird.
I disagree.
I've never bought a box of cones.
It's a little weird.
It's a little weird.
It's kind of unsettling almost.
If you've got kids, it's easier.
No, in no way is it easier.
It's not for my kids.
It's for me.
Spilling all over their hands and stuff.
No, but they can handle it.
I disavow what he just said.
It's for me.
All right.
The cones are for me.
A little weird.
I go waffle cones at home sometimes, too. That's crazy. That's fancy. Cake cones. Sugar cones are for me. A little weird. I go waffle cones at home sometimes, too.
That's crazy.
That's fancy.
Cake cones.
Sugar cones, cake cones.
But not just the little ones that you hold like this?
The little ones.
Or the gross plastic ones.
Plastic ones.
Plastic cones.
I think you're thinking of cake cones.
The ones that would be like at Haas's next to the soft surface.
Oh, you're talking about-
One with like the squares.
That's Haas's.
Those are cake cones.
Never been to Haas's.
Who's Haas?
Like those. Cake cones when the bottom little squares get all full of the drippings. Oh, you're talking about... I want, like, the squares. That's hosses. Those are cake cones. Oh, I love those. It's hoss. Like those.
Cake cones, when the bottom little squares
get all full of the drippings.
The cake cones are the best cones.
I'm talking about the hard ones are good.
The rim of the cake cones,
when you can nibble on the side of it.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's...
I like the cake cones.
I like that they're a little hollow
and they have the structure on them.
That's right.
Waffle cones are the best.
Waffle, sugar, cake.
Waffle, cake, sugar. I don't... Sugar is too hard sometimes and they're too pointy at the bottom. You know what that is? Youaffle cones are the best. Waffle, sugar, cake. Waffle, cake, sugar.
Sugar is too hard sometimes, and they're too pointy at the bottom.
You know what that is?
You don't like the crunch.
I've never claimed to be a crunchman.
Love the crunch.
I could go my whole life without crunch.
My favorite foods are soft.
Oh, I don't know if that can hold up either.
Surely we've seen you crunch before.
You guys have seen me crunch.
I'm not claiming.
Have you had tacos?
I just said I didn't like it.
Oh, good crunch.
Soft tacos are, ah.
I prefer crunchy to soft tacos.
Crunchy are better tacos.
I think it's from a confidence standpoint.
I don't want people to hear me.
I've been big on crunch wraps and creams, and now I think that soft over crunch combined
is the way to go.
It's like a silencer for a taco.
Yeah.
It's so good.
That's a crunch.
It's a crunch and soft, though.
It's the feeling of a crunch without the sound
And no spillage either
Crunchwrap Supreme
I'm probably going to get one for lunch now
Mike's bringing us lunch
Is it crunchy?
I don't know
If it isn't I'm sending it back
What culture has the crunchiest foods?
I just googled crunchiest food in the world
It's got to be Mexico. You would never
guess. I'll give you a clue.
Wait, what did you google? The crunchiest food.
Crunchiest food in the world.
And it popped up right away.
You would never guess. I'll give you a clue.
Roan didn't go there. I would never
guess. Iranians? Iranian
Tadig rice.
It's the rice at the bottom of a pan.
It's this brown crunchy rice.
I had crispy rice today.
Sweet green.
It's a good crunch.
I leave my rice, when I cook
rice, I leave it in for a little extra so it gets a
crunch. You gotta get the crunchy
rice at Fish Market.
It's like eating a bowl of cereal.
Yeah, it's good. It's some crunch.
It's some real crunch.
Hell yes. You should go on a
hunt for the best crunch.
The best crunch. Yeah, one man's
mission to find the greatest crunch. Is crunch
more important than taste?
For me, I don't know. I think it is.
For me, texture is bigger
than taste. Oh, better taste.
I don't know, dude. If you're having
something that's like eating a loogie and it tastes like steak.
I actually think crunch is a taste.
Crunch isn't a taste.
You've lost your damn mind.
Damn it.
No, but I agree because the crunch texture can make up for the bad taste.
Correct.
Soft texture does not make up for the bad taste.
You're not going to eat something that tastes bad if it crunches a little.
Yeah, you are.
No, you're not.
Yeah, I'll eat a whole thing. What are y'all talking about?
We're talking the difference between a six and an eight.
We're not talking bad.
If it tastes bad, yeah. No, he said bad.
One of y'all said bad. He said it.
He said it. Rat.
That is that upside down pizza
that I get, even though it's like real sloppy
and wet or whatever, every bite
is like a crunch. It's like a fresh
crunch and it makes it all different. If it tasted bad, you wouldn't eat it.
No, I hear you eating it because you apologize.
I order my pizza. Sorry, every bite
is almost louder than the crunch.
I order my pizza well done. Do you guys do that?
No. I never have, but I've always been envious
of it. I actually go in and I say
let me get it as is.
I want it room temperature.
I don't want crunch to my pizza.
I like a good crunch to my pizza.
I do not like crunch to my pizza.
I could get a pizza that was the consistency of a Lunchable crust.
Oh, my God.
That's awful.
That's gross to me.
Oh, that's like deep dish, though.
Or have you ever had tomato pie?
Never had tomato pie.
Tomato pie is good.
Very doughy.
Order well done.
Yeah, it's a Philly thing.
You did neighborhood eats.
Yeah.
Jersey.
That one sent me into a mental spiral. I'd like a well done pizza. Just start ordering it. I was right. Well done. Yeah, it's a Philly thing. You did neighborhood eats. Yeah. Jersey. That one sent me into a mental spiral.
I'd like a well-done pizza.
Why don't you start ordering it?
I was right before I took my hiatus.
I'm so full.
Tomato pie?
I can't fucking do this anymore.
What am I doing with my life?
Too goddamn full.
I mean, we had like, I had to have had 15 slices of tomato pie over the course of like three hours.
Then you were gone for a month.
You were like the most miserable dude I knew
for like two years.
These were not going my way for a while.
Back on top though now.
Oh yeah.
Do you guys want to see my wrestler
and Brandon's wrestler?
Yeah.
Again, tomorrow will be like a two and a half hour yak.
Very excited.
The setup is awesome.
I got to go down.
Have you guys been down to see it?
Yeah.
It's really cool.
Some stranger popped his head in, and finally everyone was like, who are you?
And he was like, I just think it looks cool in here.
Yeah, it is.
Okay.
Brandon, why don't you do the ad read for WWE 2K23?
I sure will.
And we'll show you my wrestler and Brandon's.
We'll show Brandon's first.
So WWE 2K23, first of all, their 2K series of games has been fantastic for a while,
but this is their best one they've had.
WWE 2K23 is even stronger with several gameplay enhancements.
They've got new interactive backstage environments.
They have the John Cena mode, which they've had different modes for different games through the years,
but John Cena, you have to wrestle him on a bunch of different scenarios.
It's awesome.
Revamped referee behavior and the addition of female refs.
So we have female refs now.
Improved WWE superstar models with lifelike facial, body,
and muscle animations, augmented reality, entrance models, and effects.
What you need to do is pick up or download the highest rated sports game
of the year, WWE 2k 23 today awesome uh reiterating lunch of fate is monday when ron
is back yes and mike offered to i i felt bad when he texted you say mike offered lunch i noticed
he's not here with lunch yet he'd be here around two and he was like hey i want to bring in lunch
for the yak that'd be a real dickhead move
for me to be like, no, we're actually playing a game.
He did that unprompted. Unprompted.
There's been some people tweeting at me ideas and twists.
This is a classic vanilla
lunch of fate. Yes. So stop.
It's just, eye the book.
We're playing the game. Can I just say
something? No. It seems like Mike's...
He said no.
Sass, we gloss over over you were in mental anguish
the last 90 percent of your life
no i honestly were in hell i just didn't i didn't have anything to do
yeah in new york i i mean i was thinking about this the other day i just moved here when all
my friends were home for the summer and then i moved to new
york with strangers and i would just come to the office for like 30 minutes a day and then be like
i have nothing to do here and it was palpable and contagious yeah kind of affected me
brought us all down but then when i started doing stand-up it gave me like a sense of like community
yeah see yeah nice brandon what were you gonna say it seems like if we were calling today lunch of fate
and then mike unprompted calls and says i want to provide lunch then fate took care of our lunch
no no that's a bunch of destiny oh you dumb bitch all right my bad all right brandon you want to
see your character all right port a character so what i did was uh i took advantage of wwe 2k23's many different um game modes and you can create a
character it has the deepest creative character suite i've ever seen however what you can also
do is if you have a guy like at braxton flores at brax flores braxton flores is my guy and he's my
guy that makes me wwe 2k characters he always has he helped me me with my... So you didn't do the assignment.
No, I used the download.
I went to Community Creations, and I downloaded a character.
You go there, you download.
You can put in a hashtag and search for whoever you want to search for,
whatever you want to search for.
If you want to go to my hashtags at the bottom.
No, not that.
This is how people will be able to download our characters.
Correct.
They'll put in Yak probably. but you, and there I am.
Uh, Brandon Walker.
Oh my God.
It really does look exactly like you.
Oh my God.
So, uh, that is me right there.
Uh, I am Brandon Walker superstar.
It has my case race three.
There I come.
Bring back wrestling.
Look at you.
And it's exactly like you.
Yeah, it does. So exactly like you. Holy shit.
So shout out Braxton Flores.
I could have done what you guys did, or I could just use the skills that WWE 2K23 allows
me to use and download Mr. Flores' perfect representation of me.
You've been training?
I like that he took the body loose.
Those shorts are very small.
Yeah, no, I said, why not do tights?
And he decided to go with the shorts, the underwear.
And you're dressed like you're doing a case race?
That's me, yeah.
No butt crack.
No butt crack.
Guys, that's just me.
Are those Big Cat's shoes?
Yeah, those are.
Yeah, I'm trying to spot one difference.
No, there's not.
Tiny dick.
I would wear that shirt.
Obnoxious face. Yep. I do the arms out thing a lot yeah you do
look at you you got the saunter down cocky i am little little fat but not totally fat
but definitely doesn't take care of himself no not at all what is this the belt oh this is the
belt oh the belt oh the belt, it's in a belt case.
It's in a belt case.
Well, that's what a belt would be in.
That's what we're playing for.
I didn't know that.
I didn't know.
That's what we're playing for tomorrow.
It's sick.
I would like that.
It says yak on it.
Oh, my God.
I want it so bad.
Bad luck.
Bad luck.
This will be up for grabs tomorrow.
Yeah, I'm not touching that.
I'm not touching that.
You haven't earned it.
It smells good, too.
It's really bad luck to touch that.
I refuse to smell it.
Wow.
TJ, you want to show my character?
It honestly feels like it's bad luck that he's even in the room right now.
Shout out to Braxton Flores.
I'm not breathing in the air.
I was last to go, so I...
Oh, Nick.
Mr. I'm fucked.
That actually hurt.
What?
Wow, what a pussy.
She hit me right on the shin.
That's metal.
Wait, you're actually serious? That a pussy. She hit me right on the shin. That's metal. Wait, you're actually serious?
That's metal.
I was last to go, so I had to do something different
because everyone kind of took the generic,
not generic, but like, you know,
everyone made their guys.
So I made the most detestable creature possible.
Oh, damn.
Not him yet. Interesting. Oh, this guy. possible. Oh, damn. Not him yet.
Interesting.
Oh, this guy.
You saw General Blackman.
What the fuck?
Too far.
His name is Poke Banana.
The hell is this shit?
Oh, you made Poke Banana?
I made Poke Banana.
He's a bad boy.
That's his nickname.
So I started doing this, and I was like, okay, doing everything you guys did.
That's right.
And I changed his teeth to, I was like, oh, I can change teeth color?
Oh.
And then I was like, wait, if I can change teeth color.
He's got neon teeth.
I can change everything, right?
And so.
Oh.
Oh, I know.
He's a, I know.
I made him as disgusting as humanly possible.
So far, not so.
He's 5'4", 700 pounds.
This guy would still get pussy.
I will stop you when pussy becomes impossible.
Yes, yes, yes.
Still with ease.
My character would not get pussy.
How about now?
Still with ease.
Every girl wants to go home with the green guy. Still with ease. My character would not get pussied. Still with ease. I'm just intrigued.
Every girl wants to go home with the green guy.
That's just a hockey fit.
That's a tough one.
He's cleaning up in Hancock, Michigan.
His body's still...
Yeah, the jaw.
Now he looks sad.
He really let you sit.
Yeah. He really let you edit. Yeah.
He can't decide.
No, I just...
I couldn't do the control.
Oh, my God.
He's fat.
Oh, well past pussy now.
Well past.
He's 5'4".
He ain't getting shit.
5'4".
Not that thing.
No, he's fucked.
Escalated.
Yeah.
He might be getting some Penn Station pussy.
Yeah.
Yeah. I think I... Yeah, I've seen him fucking in Penn Station
His fit's kind of nice though
I'd change that too
Ah shit yep
I was trying to find Chernobyl
But they wouldn't let me do it
He's from Moscow
And all his signs are USA
They wouldn't let you do Chernobyl.
Just make him really good, though?
Yeah, make him really good.
The helmet.
Well, then they told me that you did that, so I had to figure out something else.
Yeah, so I went with the unicorn.
Oh, he's awesome.
He gets worse.
Yeah, but it might come back around to pussy.
Did he get hair?
Or is that the hair on the...
No, I changed his hair at the end.
Yeah, see, his eyes are so disfigured they won't fit.
Boy, can't wear a traditional goggle.
Yeah, I think his earrings are blacklight.
And then, what'd I do?
Oh, yeah.
What was it?
Some things you can't wear in the... You only can wear them when you're walking in.
So I want them as is.
Oh, he looks good.
Starting to look good.
There's something really likable about him.
There is.
I think so.
Yeah, something endearing.
The chain just made him the ultimate scumbag.
Yeah.
Big boots.
Oh, no.
I think I actually ended up putting him in flip-flops.
Oh, yeah.
Flip-flops.
Jeans shorts.
That's where it starts to get a little gross.
Jeans shorts.
What did I change?
The triple Ashes belt?
Yeah, I did the military theme,
and then I just didn't do any of the military stuff.
Yeah, there it is.
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah.
Oh, he lost everything.
Well, no, he had this for hair.
I think I have him in a jerry curl, yeah.
Oh, this is the eyes.
You could change the eyes.
You guys know that?
Yeah.
For a while, I had one of his eyes be teeth,
and then it creeped me out so much that I had to change it.
He made his eyes teeth?
Yeah.
It really lets you change everything.
Yeah, it's pretty crazy.
It is probably the best character customization of everybody.
By far.
I think he's circling back around to pussy again.
Yeah, the goatee.
Yeah, he's got a blue eye, a red eye.
Oh, yeah, he's got a tattoo eye. A red eye. Oh, yeah.
He's got a tattoo.
Family?
Yeah.
On his forehead.
That actually adds to.
Here he is.
Hey.
Here he is.
He's also a high flyer.
He's spry.
Yeah.
He's a high flyer.
So he does like crazy moves.
He's 5'4", 700 pounds.
Dude, yeah. You're going to win.
Yep.
Absolutely.
Got some junk in the trunk.
Whew.
Is he a good guy or a bad guy?
I think he's a...
Well, his nickname is Bad Boy.
Look at that.
Oh!
He can move.
Yes.
I'm back on pussy.
Yep.
Yeah, I mean, the way he moves...
Lots of pussy.
It has to turn you on.
Oh, yeah. I want to go play now. Yeah, I know. I'm so excited. Oh has to turn you on. Oh, yeah.
I want to go play now.
Yeah, I know.
I'm so excited.
Oh, we got Mikey here.
What?
Is there food here?
Somebody's hungry.
The creative player, though, I could have spent forever.
Oh, yeah.
I spend more time in any video game creating the characters I'm playing.
Steve was like, I thought it was only going to take like five minutes and I was like
no dude I'm going I'm doing this
forever. And also I suck at
using video game controllers now.
I've lost that skill. We have Rones
you want to just show Rones just show him walking
out. This is
Rones character. So all the characters are complete
mischievous.
Ty Roney Rone.
He's awesome. Holy shit. Cool. I'm scared mischievous Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone
Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone Tyrone LifeWire 2. I forgot to up all my stats to 100 like everyone else did.
I forgot to.
I not only upped all my stats to 100, but just in case we play the computer,
I downed all the computer stats to zero.
Just in case.
I'm going to lose.
I didn't change any of that.
I just made them white.
Oh, no.
What is this?
That's a kiss coin.
We're doing the yak.
Do it.
You're into it. Look, you have a giant logo behind you. Yeah, you can't do it. Oh, let. What is this? That's a kiss coin. We're doing the yak. Do it. You're into it.
Look, you have a giant logo behind you.
Yeah, you can't do it.
Oh, let him in.
Let him in.
Where did he come from?
Is he bringing our food?
Yeah, let him in for a second.
Who was the guy that was back there?
Uh-oh.
Who was doing the tour?
I think this was considered a barstool event.
Oh, no, yeah.
An actual yak.
All right, what's your name?
I'm Garrett.
You're talking to Mike.
That's far, Mike? Okay. Yeah. Garrett, let me seeual yak. What's your name? I'm Garrett. You're talking to Mike.
That's far, Mike?
Really?
Okay.
Yeah.
Garrett, let me see the coin.
Is it original?
No, it's the secondary. Wait a minute.
And that's missing half of it.
It broke here.
You broke it?
Here.
Yeah.
I was trying to do something cool and flip it.
I was trying to do something cool and flip it, and it wasn't cool at all.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
That's a nightmare.
We appreciate your support, Garrett.
No problem.
Is that a Louis Vuitton bag?
that's a real one the fake one's outside
oh shit
so you have the real one and your wife has the fake one?
no that one's mine she's pregnant and all
she's got the heavy bag
such a buzzkill
long time fan long time caller to Brandon
here from Georgia
bass fishing we always talk about it
almost time
it's time.
I'm ready to go.
It is time.
It's time.
Were you worried that Brandon was going to get the axe?
No, I wasn't.
It would be more of an opportunity for me.
Oh, yeah.
True, true, true.
He's another southerner, right?
You're good.
You're damn good.
Yeah, he's quick.
You're the king still.
I'll be the prince.
Thank you.
Oh, I like that.
The prince that was promised, good. Yeah, he's quick. You're the king still. I'll be the prince. Thank you. Oh, I like that.
The prince that was promised, Garrett.
Yeah.
Well, appreciate your support, man.
Appreciate you guys having us.
It was awesome.
Yeah.
Sorry I can't kiss you.
It's okay.
It's all right.
You know what?
Spin the wheel.
Someone give Garrett a kiss. One person.
Yeah, one person give Garrett a kiss.
On the cheek.
Spin it real quick.
Yeah, we have to.
We absolutely have to.
Someone has to.
Yeah, we came up from Atlanta.
Wow.
Yeah, so understand Frank's frustrations with the transit system.
Oh, yeah.
Garrett, you can choose one person to have their name on here twice.
Uh-za.
Yeah.
Uh-za. Twice. Oh, yeah. I mean, I had every opportunity to just hand it to him while I was in there.
And I just said, no, I better not.
Yeah.
He's a busy man.
All right.
One time.
Yeah.
We got the lunch.
We'll eat it after, Steven.
Get up there, KB.
Give that man a kiss.
Even better.
Yeah.
Oh. Joke every time. Joke every time. Even better. Yeah. Oh, yeah.
That's a joke every time.
Joke time.
Every time.
Thank you, Garrett.
Appreciate your support, man.
Aw.
It's always nice seeing fans like, yeah, that's his regular dude.
Yeah.
It's reassuring.
He's a normal guy.
Yeah.
Lovely guy.
Regular dude who is carrying around a coin just in case he ever-
Oh, no, he came to the office.
It worked.
You got to bring your coin if you come to the office.
But I assume he carries it everywhere.
No way.
That would be something if you just bump into...
You bumped into just somebody carrying it around, right?
Yeah, and I saw him for a second time.
Double kiss?
In the wild, yeah.
Did he have the coin on him?
He didn't have it.
So he got his kiss and he stopped carrying the coin.
Yeah.
It was smart of us to make them kind of inconvenient sized.
They're kind of heavy too.
If they were like a key chain, we'd be fucked.
Kay, why are you holding that belt like that the whole time?
How are you supposed to hold these things?
I don't know.
Do you want to hold it?
No, ma'am.
You should wear it. It's heavy. I guess I don't have a choice. Oh, it? No ma'am You should wear it
It's heavy
I guess I don't have a choice
Oh this is so nice
Yeah it's very nice
Official authentic
I would like that
Alright
Alright
Alright
Wanna spin the real wheel, TJ?
It's in that real fucking shit.
All right.
All right.
Why?
What are you doing?
Are you doing a...
What's he doing?
He's been just trying to take more photos lately.
What's he doing?
Wait, are you going to make a comeback on...
Photogram?
Yeah, just take photos.
Yeah, just keep the memories alive.
You started doing it in Alaska.
Wait.
I bet you it's quite nice.
I mass deleted all of my pictures in like 2018, 19, 20,
and I'm like, I don't even remember what I did.
I got nothing.
I like that.
Being a photo guy is like...
Why not?
It's kind of cool, yeah.
What's the worst that can happen?
I don't know.
Takes two seconds.
Make a photo, lasts forever.
Yeah.
Will this be one of the first to go if your memory's full?
Oh, yeah, I'll probably delete.
No, it's so many screenshots.
Yeah, also, if your memory's full,
just delete your automatic downloaded podcasts.
That's all the memory. Oh, yeah. Really? Yeah, that and text messages. Yeah, also if your memory's full, just delete your automatic downloaded podcasts. That's all the memories. Really?
That and text messages. Yeah, it's all podcasts.
Text messages are also a big one.
If you have a chat
with friends or family and it's
a bunch of pictures over years, that's
a lot of memory. People texting me all the time.
I need to go through that. Yeah, but if you...
I have it now set that it
downloads five and then we'll delete... When you download the six, it I have it now set that it downloads five,
and then when you download the six, it will delete the last one. Okay.
Yeah, it's crazy how much podcasts.
What are you doing?
Are you fingering that?
He's fingering it.
He's being real dainty and going around the curves.
Oh, there's four.
It's like home plate, first base, second base, third base,
and I hit a home run.
I was rounding the bases.
You're a weird, weird guy.
Y'all don't do that when you have four.
There's a lot more than that.
Second base.
And I'm rounding second.
You would have gotten thrown out at home the way you rounded second.
It's a home run.
Now, but inside the park?
Let's see how there's four.
It's like a mental disorder.
Home plate, first base.
You know the compulsive urge to play baseball with your hands?
I hit it, and then I'm running.
Do y'all never score touchdowns on paper?
Oh, no.
You're just looking at nothing, and you're like, I just hit a home run.
No, but I got paper.
Do you think you hit the home run in real life?
Do you truly believe that?
It's a football field.
Oh, I get the ball right here.
Oh, the problem.
Go this way.
Nope.
Nope.
Make a move.
Bam.
Touchdown.
Y'all don't do that? No. It's a weird shape of a football field. I did that when I was like four. Okay. Well, now the problem? Go this way. Nope. Make a move. Touchdown. Y'all don't do that?
It's a weird shape of a football field.
Okay, well now let's turn it this way.
You're looking at nothing.
Looking at the back of a belt.
It could be a piece of paper or anything.
Y'all don't do that?
No.
Oh.
Hey!
Y'all did it.
I hit a home run, So now I'm rounding the bases
On this belt
You sound like you're in the band Cake
That's how they sing
That is how they sing
I saw Cake in concert once and it was just
The CD
I hit a home run
And now I'm rounding the bases But it was just the CD. Is that the finish? I hit a home run and now I'm rounding the
bases.
They just basically sounded
exactly like they did on their...
You kind of don't want that.
I want a little bit of improvisation or something different.
Short skirt, long jacket
would be a good Friday vibe song.
Yes.
What was that?
I ran a team marathon so it was like me and a couple of my wife's cousins.
Yeah, I know.
I don't get credit for that.
But I ran like five or six miles.
It's in your mouth.
And also, quiet your mic.
Quiet your mic.
I hear everything. Yeah, that's what I was hearing.
You're yelling at us with the sandwich in your mouth.
Sorry, sorry, sorry.
I want to know how you did it.
Steven, you ever score a touchdown on paper?
No.
God damn it.
Okay.
Marathon.
Team Marathon, which is...
I don't understand that.
It was like a bunch of...
I don't know.
It was something that when I started dating my wife,
she wanted to do with her family.
Oh, one of those things.
You had to do it for pussy.
Yep.
Okay.
So I ran the first leg and I ran I think six miles
the entire time
I just listened to Kate
going the distance.
On repeat?
On repeat for like
I don't know
48, 50 minutes.
Jesus.
And then wait
what do you do?
You hand it off
and then you just stand there?
Yeah essentially.
So you
picking first
is definitely the way to go.
Going first. Going first.
Going first, yes.
Yeah.
Very attractive people walking by.
Yeah, what's going on?
Yeah.
A lot of buzz.
A buzz in the office.
I talked to Alex today.
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
Who?
Mean Girl.
Oh.
Is she mad at you?
I thought you meant to.
No, she wasn't.
I asked her
I think she
I was calling her dumb maybe
But then she was like maybe I am
I was like that was my point
Maybe you are
Yeah the Kelly Alex Jordan
Tiff feels like it's
They both said they want it to be over
I'm struggling to keep up
I think we're going to have another I think they wanted to be over but I'm struggling to keep up on I think we're gonna have another I think
they have to have a face off
you gotta yell
at each other we got a
wrestling ring downstairs I told Alex
if I were her if I gave her any advice
to be to invite Kelly on the podcast
and then like
study up on one subject
and then try to make Kelly look dumb
that's what I would do industrial revolution yeah yeah study up on one subject and then try to make Kelly look dumb.
That's what I would do.
The industrial revolution.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
You just casually be like,
yeah, so how did they,
how did we start making like,
you know, mass producing things?
I do that a lot.
And then Jordan just drops like a bunch of facts.
I don't know.
Did you see the poker tournament Nate's in tonight?
Who's he playing against?
Bryce Hall and Josh Richards and really, really big names.
I think he's the only, is he the only poker player?
No, there's the guy with face tats.
Oh, I did see it because I was curious.
They were like, instead of calling it celebrity poker, they called it content creator poker.
Yeah.
Which doesn't feel as cool.
CCP.
Yeah.
Hopefully he wins.
What's the bar for content creator?
Creator poker night.
There he is.
Who's the guy on the far left?
Who do you think?
That's Fora.
Who do you think kicked off?
If it was Bryce Hall and Josh Richards, that would be celebrity poker, right poker right who ended the celebrity i don't know the other people yeah you don't know hoodie allen oh yeah i can't
yeah i know him well he's a celebrity the guy with the face like rickety cricket from always
sunny he was like a legit like high roller poker player he was playing and in... Yeah. He's like a professional. I don't like how they did Fora and Nate
on the ends there.
I feel like that was...
Is Fora a gamer?
He's gotta be.
They're all gamers.
Nate better take
these fuckers down.
He better.
Otez is gonna win.
Otez?
Who?
The chess girl.
She's chess?
Yeah, she was in the office
and she beat us all in chess.
Oh, that's right.
Her and her sister?
Yeah.
But wait, Nick,
she beat you in chess?
She's a chess player. Yeah, it was... She's Oh, wait, Nick, she beat you in chess? She's a chess player.
Yeah.
She's like the highest ranked that a woman can be in chess.
But I was partnered with Frank.
I would have won.
But isn't the highest ranked woman the worst man?
Yeah.
Do they compete against men?
I hope not.
It's a different ranking scale.
What's the...
Wait, they have a different...
Why?
What's the advantage?
Isn't chess supposed to be
chess goes up to grandmaster
and women I think don't have
grandmaster
wait what
that's so sad
that's the most
sexist
women don't have
that's horrible
wait what
there's nothing physical
what is the advantage
women's
the pieces are lighter maybe
wait what
there's a trans chess player who's just dominating the women's league right
that's fucked up what's next 17 shows in a row about it
oh man that is crazy women can't Yeah, well, I don't understand that at all.
Is that?
It'd be the same with, like, any gaming at all.
Yeah.
Wait, wasn't there, what was that show that everyone watched?
Queen's Gambit?
Yes.
Yeah, she was beating all the guys.
It was damn good.
She had an interesting face.
What else, like, intellectual is gendered?
Scrabble?
No.
They have the pink boards.
In the Scrabble Championships.
I don't know.
Is it mixed?
I would hope so.
It's like having a separate spelling bee.
Chess isn't.
The script spelling bee is mixed.
How is chess not?
I don't know.
It's insane.
It makes no sense.
That's crazy.
It's literally just built to be like, yeah, women can't do this.
Hey, you're going to have to get really good at chess. I'm going to have to get really good at chess.
You're just going to have to do it.
Okay.
Awesome at chess.
I can't even play checkers, so.
How are the sandwiches, Steven?
Oh.
Whoa, thumbs up. That's a bad sign.? Whoa, thumbs up.
That's a bad sign.
Emphatic thumbs up.
Any chips?
Very good.
Mike just came in and was like, wait till you see what's in that box.
Give us the box.
I don't mean to go all seven on you.
It's probably cannolis.
You don't have to bring in all that.
Just open the box right now.
Right here?
Yeah, just open the box.
It's cannolis.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Oh, no, Stephen.
Oh, no.
What is like a...
String, yeah.
We saw it.
Stephen's thwarted by a string. He couldn't even describe it. He's warded by a string.
He couldn't even describe it.
He's like, what are those?
It's got a lock on it of some type.
Okay.
It's not segregated.
There's just some.
Put your pinch forks down.
There's some female only competition.
Got it. Alright, let's see.
And... Over the camera. right, let's see. And...
Over the camera.
Nice.
That's beautiful.
I can't see it.
Doing a great job, Stephen.
Great job.
T-shirt.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, is that Eclair's?
Italian cookies?
Italian cookies.
Oh, Eclair's.
Wait, is that Eclair's?
Oh.
Oh.
Oh, yes. Oh, man.
I love eclairs.
Steven, are there chips?
Potato chips?
No, but there's in our kitchen.
I can grab you some if you want.
Yeah, maybe go get some chips.
Potato chips.
I'm going to need that crunch.
Poker chips. I'm going to need that crunch. Poker chips.
Had to clarify.
So, we got to start the other show soon, right? Yeah, let's spin the wheel.
Let's do the...
Actually, Nicky, why don't you do the last ad?
The HelloFresh.
Me?
Yeah.
All right.
Make mealtime easy with delicious recipes made with fresh, wholesome ingredients delivered to your door.
No lines, no hassle, just great tasting meals you can whip up and enjoy in the comfort of home.
The cost of groceries going up and up now is the perfect time to get started with HelloFresh.
HelloFresh is cheaper than grocery shopping and 25% less expensive than takeout.
HelloFresh has 40 weekly recipes to choose from
for all meal occasions, lifestyles, and preferences.
Take your pick from meals like soy glazed salmon
with rice or mushroom and chive risotto.
Powering up with protein is easier than ever with HelloFresh.
Just check the protein smart tag on their menu
to quickly find recipes featuring 30 grams or more of protein,
like one pot pork and black bean chili or creamy
dijon dill chicken hello fresh knows you're busy that's why they take care of the meal planning
and prepping freeing up extra time in your schedule with pre-portioned ingredients foolproof
recipes and convenient doorstep delivery hello fresh makes it easy to get dinner on the table
we love hello fresh it's a nice way to mix things up instead of just takeout or delivery all the time. Go to HelloFresh.com slash Yak60.
That's Y-A-K-6-0.
And use code Yak60 for 60% off plus free shipping.
That's code Yak60 at HelloFresh.com slash Yak60.
60%.
Love it.
That's a good deal.
HelloFresh.
Fights tweeted the other night.
He's like, I just made the best meal ever.
It was a HelloFresh.
They are very good.
They are.
And it's nothing better than a home-cooked meal.
Dry.
Lunch of Fate coming on Monday.
And I don't want anybody thinking there's twists mid-Lunch of Fate.
You've been very clear.
It's just a Lunch of Fate.
And what have we been for, like a...
It's just a Lunch of Fate.
It's a Lunch of Fate.
Okay.
Oh, yeah, you weren't here yesterday, but yeah, it's a regular one.
Just imagine, like, you've played Lunch of Fate a bunch.
Right.
Just regular.
And I don't want it to be, it's not like Hollywood's representation of it.
Okay. I don't want it to be it's not like Hollywood's representation of it okay
what I have in my mind out of
doing the launch of fate
oh what is this
sweaty guy oh this is the time lapse of that guy
yes oh yeah
he's Italian
oh no
oh my god
oh no it's like a magic changing shirt color changing shirt Oh, no. Look. Oh, my God. Oh, no.
It's like a magic changing shirt.
Color changing shirt.
They must really be asking him some hard hitting questions.
Yeah.
Oh, God.
Now, like, if he gets a little more sweat, that's just the color of the shirt.
This is satisfying.
You better get completely damp.
Guys get the butt crack sweats and khakis.
That's tough.
Oh, yeah.
I thought you were going to say that did it for you.
Oh, yeah. That gets me were going to say that did it for you. Oh, yeah.
That gets me fucking going.
Roberto Baggio.
The butt crack sweat is tough.
The butt crack sweat is very tough either.
There's nothing you can do.
It's dangerous.
Yeah.
I don't know if I've ever.
I'm not putting on khakis.
Can you?
New York in the summer.
Over 80 degrees.
No jersey transit.
Never will I wear khakis.
No chance.
You see it Can't
It's out there
That's sad
Do it
The good thing is
The person doesn't know
Oh they know
Yeah I know they know
Cause it feels wet
Yeah
Damn
Swamp ass
Do some gold bond in there
We'll do that
You talcum the crack
If it's a real hot day
You gotta
Just give yourself
A little
A little
Extra something Feels like someone's Blowing like Spearmint gum If it's a real hot day, you gotta. Just give yourself a little extra something.
Feels like someone's blowing spearmint gum onto your ass.
Which feels awesome.
Which feels awesome.
I'd pay for that service.
It's a crazy feeling.
Put it on the wheel.
Gum in the ass.
It's a mouthful of spearmint gum.
Nick.
What up?
Do we have any updates on the cup stacking, gentlemen?
I think I got conned.
Yes.
It was a Theo Vaughn bit that I saw he was doing on.
Oh, what?
Theo Vaughn.
Look, he was doing hot ones.
I would text like nine numbers in a group, just random numbers.
And I would be like, Randall just won first place.
Bruh, and I just found a picture.
I would just Google Asian boy with trophy and find a random picture of an Asian kid with a trophy.
And I'd send it to everybody.
And people would be like, good for him.
And then somebody would be like, who the fuck is Randall?
So I think somebody saw this.
That's definitely what happened.
All right.
I got got.
Shit, that's actually funny.
I'm so excited.
So he never was in it.
That sucks. I mean, the photo's real, so that boy did win. Something. so excited so he never was in it that sucks
I mean the photo's real so that boy did win
something
I should have known
Wednesday he has another competition
yeah but when would they have
you're not winning your first one
the first competition's an eye opener
yeah that's true
makes you work harder
yeah you're like oh yeah me beating my little brother
shouldn't have counted.
Humbling.
Yeah.
Okay, so should we wrap up?
Because we do have to do this whole shit.
Two and a half hours tomorrow.
It's going to be awesome.
Yep.
Yep.
Let's go eat our sandwiches.
Let's eat our sandwiches.
Oh, yeah.
And then we'll see everyone tomorrow.
Two and a half hour yak.
Wrestling championship. We have a half hour yak wrestling championship.
We have a huge new
set for it.
It's going to be
brazy.
You don't like
that.
Well are we.
We're not.
We're not Crips
right.
I don't think this
will be crazy anyway.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
It's crazy.
What.
What.
What blood.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So are we. What are we?
I don't know We should probably pick a side
Yeah I feel like we do have to pick a side
Are we Bloods or Crips?
What's the perks of either?
I need to know
Saying Brazy is a pretty big perk
Yeah to be able to say you're Boolin
Oh yeah the B ones are better
Yeah
What word is that? Hoolin Yeah, to be able to say you're boolin'. Oh, yeah, the B ones are better. Yeah, yeah.
What word is that?
Hoolin'.
Oh.
It's replacing any C, right?
It's like Michigan when they play, or Ohio State when they play Michigan.
It's like when Sheetz is like, this is a shmagle shmelt instead of a bagel melt,
how they make everything start with a B.
Yeah.
Thank you for making that digestible for me.
I didn't understand that until now.
Got to put into Sheetz for me.
Though, calling
Brandon Crandon would be kind of cool.
Well, do they do it the opposite
way? I don't know.
They do. Crips don't say
words that start with B? Yeah, they both
do the same thing. Yeah, so it'd be Crandon.
And you'd be Big Bat.
Yeah, it'd be Big Bat.
Or you'd be
Sig Cat. Oh, fuck.. Or it'd be a Crip. Or you'd be Sig Cat.
Oh, fuck.
You could always have a Marvin.
Bick?
Yeah.
Casey?
Huh?
Or Cakey?
Casey, yeah. Yeah, you'd be Casey.
You've seen the Sunshine Band.
Casey at the Bat.
No, but cry.
Okay.
All right, we'll see everyone everyone tomorrow Two and a half hour episode
Maybe three hours
What is happening
No butt crack
I don't know what it is We'll see you next time.