The Yak - Mook Might Be Getting a 30K Meatball Payday | The Yak 12-11-23
Episode Date: December 11, 2023DeVito and Tua. DeVito and Tua.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolya...k
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Hello, boys.
The whole crew's back.
What up?
What up?
I gave Zaha $500 anyway, even though I beat him in a hole. No, you didn't.
No, you didn't.
No, you didn't.
I had to get that in.
Come on.
Dickhead.
People were angry.
Mook, how was re-watching?
Brutal.
I was re-watching at a Wendy's in Louisville outside of Greyhound Bus Station.
He fell to his knees in a Wendy's parking lot.
No!
I ordered like 20 nuggets to make myself feel better.
It didn't feel better.
That'll make you feel way better, man.
Yeah, there were a few moments there.
I tried to pick up Zah at one point.
I forgot I tried to do that.
He's dense.
He's a thick boy.
That was a lot of fun.
I know that it didn't go the way people wanted it to go.
I was rooting for Zod when I was re-watching it.
Unfortunately, I knew that I wasn't.
They would have made a movie out of that.
Yeah.
Documentary.
You have the option to not beat him.
I know, but then I played it out in my head,
and I'm like, but who's the bad guy?
Who's the bad guy?
But yeah, Brandon get jumping.
Oh, you got air well i got you it was
also perfect that because we taped it in two parts because we had to do the regular yak in between
so the first part people were complaining they're like there's just a ref show by jerry and i'm just
like wait till you see the twists because brandon's coming and if you thought it was a ref show yeah
you did a great job, though, Brandon.
I saved you once.
I saved you once, Mook.
You did.
You did hook it up.
Yeah, the never before.
We had two firsts in the umpiring business.
It was the home run out call, and then we also had the no pitch because of sarcasm.
It was a sarcastic pitch.
I think that's a good rule.
I forgot about that.
Sarcastic pitch.
Nope. He was clearly being sarcastic. think that's a good rule i forgot about that sarcastic pitch nope he was clearly
being sarcastic yeah oh that's his ref that's his ref shows against yeah it's sarcastic listen
i had to get on his ass for throwing it too hard and then to show me up he threw it as soft as he
could and it was the detriment of the matter yeah yeah imagine mahomes having to deal with
a sarcastic ref pitch.
Crying for days.
I feel like when he switches and throws it lefty, that's sarcastic.
Yeah.
It's like, I can do this too.
Touchdown gets called back for sarcasm.
Yeah.
Yeah, what's up?
How was New York?
It was really busy.
Yeah?
Yeah.
You guys were working nonstop.
That's what we do, man.
Had some fun, for sure.
Yeah? Yeah.
What was the most fun you did?
We shot some sketches with Feidelberg.
Nice.
I like that guy.
He's okay.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't care what people say about him.
I like him.
I don't care what literally everybody says about him.
Fuck that.
They say a lot of shit about him, but I love him.
I ignore it all.
I disregard it.
I'll read it just to see it all i disregard it i'll read
it just to see how wrong it is i'll read every bit fights is maybe the if you had to pick one
person that like has not changed at all in barstool like history he's number one and i mean that in
the best way possible oh yeah he's just the same dude the same awesome dude since day one nothing
like he just is he's down for whatever uh nothing really bothers
him no we were filming out his place he just has like candy in his bed yeah yeah oh yeah fights
and i used to say when we would go on the road and stuff we would we would share hotel rooms and
we would just we would go and just buy like 50 worth of candy he's still doing it on hotel
bedrooms like me on one bed, him on the other,
just eating candy, just hanging out.
Yeah.
Like, this is fun.
Yeah, he's a great guy.
People would be shocked to find that out.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's the best when, like, a scumbag gets into money,
and he's still a scumbag.
Yeah.
Like, in the best way possible.
Yeah, right.
Yeah.
Yeah, he just wants his candy.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's really it.
Yeah.
I've never liked him.
No? No. You don't like who are
we talking about on final bird is it his last name because i have news for you yeah that was
an all-time blog when dave found out he wasn't jewish but dave kind of hired him because of his
name yeah yeah he hired him because his name was so weird. He's like, wait, you're not Jewish?
When was this?
Way back.
He used to call him Feets as well.
Thought his name was Fetalberg.
What did Sass call Gaz?
Was it called Gauze?
Gauze.
He thought he was Turkish.
Yeah, he went, it's like Turkish or like a medical rap.
Or like an 18-year-old Beverly Hills girl.
Oh, yeah.
That's gauze.
I bet you that's been said a lot.
Yeah.
So it was a good trip?
Yeah, it was a good trip.
Yeah, we have some good Christmas sketches that will be coming out like the 21st.
Nice.
Nice.
We got a big week coming this week.
Oh, yeah. People coming in the office all week
we're gonna have the we're filming the christmas special tomorrow night did everyone buy their
gifts not yet nope i did and mine's gotta get shipped here today i'm nervous we're filming
this tomorrow tomorrow night 7 30 yeah yeah mine's homemade. Oh, yeah. Yours is homemade. I got it. Are you free?
No, you're $50, right?
I think I was $150.
Either way.
I'm $150.
I think Sass was free and KB was homemade.
I'm having $250.
Sass was $400 last year, I think.
Yeah.
No, $500.
You had to buy me a boo-boo.
Yeah.
I'm almost certain you're $50.
I went over.
Who's the most?
Rone has $1, a thousand dollars unfortunately he just
dropped 500 on the new york office gift exchange which had no price limit but it had no minimum
either and everybody really went the minimum oh we're doing a gift exchange next wednesday here
yeah yeah us it's the nicky smokes no the whole office we are yeah what's a white elephant or i don't even
know what these are that white elephant so i need to get a gift for that too yeah okay but that will
be whatever you want just whatever you get from this one just put it in that that's what i'm
gonna do nikki smokes will give you chlamydia for free though yeah that's fine it's a great
exchange i'm sure he's he's riddled with it he has enough to give me and six girls the best was
the year that i i got uh all business pita puppy oh yeah yeah that's when i knew you were one of the ones i was new you almost
for solely tweeted yeah you did almost slowly tweet that well you got him a puppy oh i i i
found someone online who let me use their puppy so we did the whole like secret santa and then
pete went last and it was just a puppy in a box and I was like, here you go. Your kid's always wanted one.
He was so mad.
Was there ever a moment in that where he resigned himself
and he was actually happy he got the puppy?
No, he doesn't like dogs.
You can't be around a puppy
and not want it for your own.
It's a cute puppy.
Jam, I think, was the name.
I think I still follow.
You think that puppy's still alive?
I hope so.
It was only like six, seven years ago.
Yeah.
Yeah. He's doing fine.
Yeah, Jim is still just crushing it out there.
Kyle, are you getting a cat soon?
Well, maybe tomorrow night.
I thought you got puppy fever from being – we were at Roan's, playing with Roan's.
Oh, I did.
Yeah.
Puppies are great.
Fun.
If I were to get a pet, I would be happy.
If someone wanted to get me a cat.
I'm $2.50.
Is that cat price?
How are we assigned?
Like, we're spinning the wheel.
Cats are either way more expensive or way cheaper.
Yeah, I feel like you can just grab a cat.
Because, like, what if I bought a cat for Kyle?
What if we all get cats?
Oh, no.
No, it's going to be, I think we're going to do just all the gifts in the middle,
and then we'll figure out who gets what. It's going to be a very much yak Christmas where we're not going to be, I think we're going to do just all the gifts in the middle, and then we'll figure out who gets what.
It's going to be a very much yak Christmas where we're not going to have a plan,
and then we're going to change the plan like 16 times.
Having not seen the gifts, I feel like I probably deserve the $1,000 gift more so than the homemade one.
But we haven't seen them yet, so it's hard to say.
I got the sickest boom box, and I think Kyle got a diorama from Kate last year.
I was walking out of the office.
Oh, I was so excited.
No, I got an air fryer.
Who got the diorama?
I think I did.
I think he ended up with it.
I think I ended up with it.
I ended up with all the big cats shit he was trying to throw away.
Yeah, which is good shit.
Yeah.
But, yeah, we'll air that on Friday before Christmas,
but we're going to tape it tomorrow night.
So, yeah, I think Rodent Sass might be here tomorrow,
and then we'll have a bunch of people in the office on Wednesday.
Will will be here Thursday.
TJ, do we have to do the Yak Challenge all week?
Yes.
Okay, so that should be good.
We'll have a bunch of people, new people do it.
That's great.
So we're going to do one today.
We'll do it at the end of the episode?
Yes.
Okay.
Perfect.
So what are we going to get?
Well, we could just spin the wheel and have us go.
Is the Surviving Barstool finale here?
Yes.
In this office or just in Chicago?
Yes.
Here.
Whoa.
Yes.
Is that Wednesday?
Where in Chicago would it be?
I don't know.
The theater?
Here.
We do a lot of live events in Chicago.
Yeah, you're right.
No, here. Yeah. And then don't know. The theater? Here. We do a lot of live events. Yeah, you're right. No, here.
Yeah.
And then the after party, the wrap party at Barstool River North.
Yeah.
You see Shane Gillis called out or said he's like a huge Rico.
Yeah, Rico.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I do.
I have like random people from my life being like, this is the best.
Yeah, it's incredible.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm like, I'm very upset that i wasn't in it
no you weren't at all kelly is hosting the rap party uh or not the rap party but the after show
she's got tricks up her sleeve she's got tricks up her sleeve which one of them i think she's
she's gathering intel from everyone about like questions i could ask that could get the
conversation going and she texted me being like what do you want to get off your chest?
I was like, I wasn't on the show.
So I'll just be there.
I'll hang out.
Steve, what's your situation?
Experiencing any heat still from the show?
A little bit from two people's groups.
But I actually kind of lean into it.
Rico kind of went serious tone
on you. Oh yeah, that tweet was
crazy. That was a little bit of a
relapse. It was like
people were having fun with it
and then he was just like,
you suck, I hope you get cancer and die.
One of those. Yeah, I mean one of the
more inconsistent humans
should not be surprised.
I didn't want to link my fate of a hundred potential a hundred thousand dollars to him so yeah yeah but and i
did i guess i did you you didn't even vote him off rico yeah oh i did oh you did okay
so then he does have a fair i mean it was Will's idea who he's slurping online, but whatever he wants to do.
I like this.
So this will be Wednesday night.
This will be Wednesday night.
Dude, I had to sit next to Tommy Smokes on the plane while he watched it on his laptop
and visibly audibly cheered every time he did something good.
Oh, man.
Dude, you guys know I fucking hate Tommy, right?
Everything about him.
It was insane.
I went to the airport Chili's with him,
and he was acting like he was pretending just to himself
that it was the best restaurant he's ever been to.
So everybody just go, oh!
And then, like, the woman came up,
and he, like, complimented the chef on his lava cake.
Oh.
He's the worst, man.
Did you hear the thing that he revealed on Advisors?
Stu put it perfectly.
It's like there was a couple puzzle pieces he was trying to put together,
and Tommy finally put it together for him.
Tommy took steroids when he was 15 or 16 years old
because he couldn't hit puberty.
I've been to that appointment, yeah.
It was like he had to get steroids to force his body
to have puberty
I did too
oh
yeah
shot in my ass
I don't think it was steroids
I think it was growth hormones
but you're normal
yeah you're
yeah that's not funny
that didn't define your life
it's defined Tommy's life
yeah
like he had
he had to force himself
into puberty
yeah he walks around
with that
fact his whole life.
Gotcha.
You know what I mean?
Would he have not hit it?
Kind of.
He said he had no ball hairs when he was like 15.
So that hangs over everything that's happened to him since.
Yeah, I think it's the seminal moment in his life.
It's kind of like when your dog got hit by the bus you were on.
In fourth grade.
Yeah, that was a real pivotal moment.
Bo. Everybody fourth grade. Yeah, that was a real pivotal moment. Bo.
Everybody has those.
Mine was winning $100 at a turtle race
when I was 12 years old.
You were hooked?
Mrs. Linden.
This is my thing.
This is awesome.
We're going around a curve.
She never even checked up.
Just bam, hit him right in the head.
Didn't kill his head.
It didn't kill him, right?
It just smashes his wings.
Huh?
No, it just killed him.
She ran over him
with the back tires oh do you remember how it felt in the seat parts of him everywhere huh it's like
a horror story yeah she said whose dog was that and i raised my hand she said well that's too bad
and my mama she got pissed yeah she went after her she found out where she lived
mama got pissed oh yeah that was her dog bow was her where she lived. Mama got pissed? Oh, yeah. That was her dog.
Bo was her dog.
She loves bass and hounds.
Did she retaliate?
I need to buy my mama a bass and hound.
She called me this weekend.
God damn it.
Why?
Catch up.
The best.
What time did she call me?
Thursday.
Well, that's not this weekend.
No.
That's way last week.
Thursday at 8.30 in the morning.
Why?
Wow. Just talking over coffee. She doesn't drink coffee. I was this weekend. No. That's way last week. Thursday at 8.30 in the morning. Why? Wow.
Just talking over coffee.
She doesn't drink coffee.
I was having coffee.
Okay.
She's coming up next week.
I know.
Oh.
Brandon, I...
Okay, all right.
Goodbye.
Nick flew her out.
Where are you taking her?
Aquarium?
No, Caitlin's coming over.
She wants to go to the aquarium.
Caitlin's what?
She wants to go to the aquarium.
I'm not going to take her to the aquarium.
Oh, I should go to the aquarium with her and my kids.
Yeah.
That'd be fun.
That'd be great.
Yeah.
No.
Are you going to take her anywhere?
Yeah, we have a couple spots.
And you're going to take her to the aquarium?
Yeah.
All right, good.
That's fine.
Caitlin will be here.
She'll have to take her somewhere.
Where are you going to take her, Nick?
We're going to smoke a dube and then go to the planetarium.
She'll do that.
And you got that place at the Drake Hotel, too?
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
We're after.
All right.
Not a suite, but it will be.
You're not going to have sex with my 67-year-old mother.
Would that tear the show apart?
Yeah, would it?
I don't know.
I don't think it would.
What do you mean you don't know?
It's my mother.
I know, but you're so like, I always give you credit for this.
You do go with the flow.
Wait, let's just put it up to a vote.
Anyone who would be opposed to Nick having sex with Brandon's mother?
Y'all fuck whoever.
Oh, wow, Nick.
Just ain't right. Yeah. but i got outvoted nothing you could do having a democracy can't be mad you'd be mad at everybody else
oh brandon and i had a fun time we went to we went to army navy game yeah didn't actually go
to the game.
How was the show?
It was good.
It was actually a really good show.
That's fun.
I mean, it's always like a great crowd.
It's a different crowd.
Yeah.
It's a respectful crowd. Yeah, is that fun or is it just like going to a museum?
Are you paying your respect?
Do you just feel like you're paying your respects at all times?
No, it's fun.
Or is it cool to see?
It's very cool to go to the game.
Yeah. Or is it cool to see? It's very cool to go to the game. Yeah.
Because, like, the flyovers and the fact that it's, like, all the pomp and circumstance,
it's all fun.
And then the football is usually bad, but it's fun in its own way.
Tailgates.
We're getting impromptu National Anthem.
Like, we're getting fucked up or...
Yeah, people get fucked up.
It's a lot.
You know what it is?
It might be the number one, outside of the final four, it might be the number one outside of the final four it
might be the number one father son sporting oh yeah a lot of father sons being like we did it
we got here masters well there's no masters up there too there's no hatred like the army navy
fans there's mutual respect would you say impromptu national anthem what does that mean we were in the
middle of the show and they just started the crowd started singing the national anthem oh casey threw me under the bus she was like we should have had you dou national anthem? What does that mean? We were in the middle of the show, and the crowd started singing the national anthem.
Casey threw me under the bus.
She was like, we should have had you do the national anthem.
And then the whole crowd was like, do it.
They throw that around like it's Olay.
Yeah.
Then they started doing it.
It ended up being a great moment, so Casey was off the hook.
But yeah.
Probably not a lot of women.
Not a lot of women.
Nope.
Well, no.
No.
No, you're right. About the same amount of women as we always
have with those true yeah so not a lot ever a lot of women we had stav was here he couldn't come on
the act because he had to take a flight out but he described this office as like the little rascals
like tree hut oh wow you got to have a few women but really i was like you're kind of right i was
in the mostly sports studio as he was walking out and he came in and he gave me a handshake hug and
he's like all right man well i'm gonna catch you next time i've never met him yeah that's an awesome
move yeah he just came in and said said a heartfelt goodbye he doesn't know who i am i don't think
no he probably knows who you are you're bringing we hadn't we we hadn't met number one you're number one number one on the boomer list i do i have a banner number one
yeah see that damn i guess this man oh look at that now are you nervous when does when do you
uh stop resting on your laurels and start working towards 2024. I think I have until opening day of next season.
Really?
I disagree.
Why?
I think transfer portal, summer camp.
You've got to be in it on that.
He's already hit the ground running.
What's your Heisman big board look like for next year?
Oh, what a question.
Carson Beck probably number one.
I've got to be honest, Brandon.
Probably?
You got number one without really doing shit.
What do you mean without doing shit? I don't really do shit. Do you believe you're number one? I got to be honest, Brandon. You got number one without really doing shit. What do you mean without doing shit?
I do everything.
You don't really do shit.
Do you believe you're number one?
Of course I do.
I've been believing that for years.
Yeah, that's literally his entire existence.
He was born believing he was number one.
I believed that before I worked at Barstool.
Yeah.
Is it because of your opinions?
I'm a truth teller.
You don't back down?
What was your most electric moment?
Missouri.
Probably standing in front of Iowa fans as they pelted people around me.
That was this season?
That was last season.
That was last season.
Oh.
What about this season?
Like at the awards show when they're doing the little montage.
Yeah, what would go on your highlight?
What's going in there?
You nailed Missouri.
I nailed Missouri.
The meat riding is crazy, little bro.
That would be up there.
Damn. Yeah. I think you're hiding in the bushes. That would be up there. Damn.
Yeah.
I think you're hiding in the bushes.
Me hiding in the bushes was okay.
Being in that OU hype video.
I was in Oklahoma.
Oh, yeah.
After they beat Texas.
Give me one.
I had a big year.
I had a big year.
You had a huge year.
Yeah.
He did do a preseason list this year.
So there might be a preseason list next year that you need to work towards.
You actually don't want to be number one on that.
No, you don't want to be number one preseason.
What was that?
Oh, this was preseason?
Oh, this is different.
Oh, Will was number one.
No, no, no, no.
Oh, Will was number one.
This is different, though.
This is by a follower?
This is on Twitter.
Wait, fuck.
This is bad.
This is very specific.
I went from seven to 12.
So I had a bad year.
Yeah, you did.
I got upset.
Will as well. Wait, so what had a bad year. Yeah, you did. I got upset. Will as well.
Wait, so what was the list you got one on?
It was just 5-1.
No, this is top 100 best college football media personalities on Twitter.
The one I was number one was just college football media personalities, period.
So there's work to be done on Twitter for you.
I guess, although my tweets are way better than any of those.
Yeah.
True.
Yeah. Pretty good True. Yeah.
Pretty good.
You know what you should do?
Yeah, what?
You should get a list of every single college, every university, and talk shit on each school
so they can pluck it and just use it on hype videos.
See how many hype videos you can get.
Oh, I've been done doing that.
It works.
Yeah.
But no, like just one video so that they could fast forward to their school and it's free
use.
Yeah, you time stamp it.
Yeah.
I've been on- Big like a two hour YouTube. Yeah. Big like a two-hour YouTube.
I've been to Arkansas before, Oklahoma's.
Who's getting too cocky?
Who's flying too close to the sun?
Oh, gosh.
Who's flying too close to the sun?
New Mexico State?
Well, no.
I was going to say Michigan.
I mean, Michigan thinks they've already won something.
They haven't won anything yet.
Haven't won a damn thing yet.
Michigan is your one blind spot.
It's not a blind spot.
It is a blind spot. Yeah, it's not a blind spot. You think every year they're bad. Alabama's
about to beat them. And they're good every year. They're okay. And they cheat. What's
your blood oath? You're not allowed to bring that up if they win? The national championship,
yeah. So I got about, well, no, I got forever because they're not going to win. But if they
won national title, I have about a month left you can never bring up
connor silence uh no if they win national title i can never bring up the cheating again which would
be fine if they win the national title i'd be tired of talking about it i'll just i'll just
claim the blood oath i can't talk about michigan anymore yeah what do you get out of the blood of
nothing that seems like a bad deal by you sounds like in hindsight i didn't yeah really uh load
my side of the wagon very properly,
but here's what it is.
You're playing ball with boss man.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm all in on the Tide, by the way.
Willie just resurfaced with Drewski.
Oh, yeah.
I think it was amazing.
Who resurfaced?
Can we watch that?
Roll Tide Willie.
Do you know the Alabama guy, Willie?
I don't give a damn about anything but the Tide.
I don't give a piss about anything but the Tide. I don't give a piss about anything but the Tide.
Yeah, and Andruski's doing the same thing.
We were on the bus with him in Alabama,
and it was when Dave was betting the U.S. Open,
and we had tennis on, and I was just like, sarcastically,
like, Willie, what do you got in the U.S. Open?
He's like, Tide's not playing.
And I'm like, well, would you watch?
He's like, if the women's T tide were in tennis, I'd watch it.
He's like, he only cares about the tide.
Yeah.
Huh.
We'll care about shit, but Bama, our people in the tide.
Yeah, tide, that's it.
Yeah.
Take the dog.
Damn dog, get out the dog.
We don't give a bitch. We don't give a bitch. We don't give a bitch. Yeah, you can feel that.
I don't give a piss about nothing but the tide, baby. Don't give a piss about nothing but the tide, baby.
Don't give a piss about nothing but the tide.
I love America and I love the tide, baby.
And I love Will and Adele.
Got it right.
I love the tide.
Don't give a piss about nothing but the tide.
Don't give a piss about nothing but the tide.
Don't give a piss about nothing but the tide.
This is my baby darling.
We've been married 32 years.
We just had our anniversary down in Myrtle. And you don't even know that. I don't even know that. You don't even know that. Oh, man. Yeah. We love you, man.
God bless America.
God bless America.
Yeah.
Greatest country there is.
Greatest country there is.
Want a match, Willie?
We'll show you something.
Yeah.
But that's Roll Tide Willie.
That is him just walking around. Yeah, that's not an act. he that is him yeah just walking around yeah that's not an act is
that is that his baseline like yes oh yeah just don't give like if you ask him a question about
anything besides the tide he just his eyes immediately like glaze over so is dave going
to the game with him i don't know that electric yeah puts out cigarettes on his hands, feet. Does he? Feet. Why? I don't know.
He just does.
What is in his bag?
I don't give a piss.
Could he work here?
I don't think he'd work anywhere.
Yeah, he probably could, yeah.
But anybody could.
Yeah.
That's how it's at, kid.
Yeah.
No, he's a legend.
Roll Tide Willie.
I don't give a piss about nothing but the Tide. Yeah, I'd like to see what he does all day, every day. He just thinks legend Roll Tide Willie I don't give a piss about
Nothing but the Tide
Yeah I'd like to see
What he does all day
Every day
He just thinks about the Tide
Just the Tide
He hosts a morning show
Every Tuesday through Thursday
Does he?
Oh
No
Oh
Stupid ass
That would've been awesome
I'm on it tomorrow
Are you?
Yeah
We got a brainstorming meeting
we are mostly sports tomorrow?
afterwards yeah
no he's on
wake up nights
oh
yeah
I miss that show
I got a brainstorming meeting
it's tomorrow
or today
right after this
so
I wonder how it's gonna go
does he even need to be there?
I don't know if he will be
he'll send one of his reps you're gonna use the
boardroom there's gonna be nine producers yeah all of them yeah yeah it's more staff than the snl
writers room what do we got this week boys colin jost is helping with wake up mincey yeah oh yeah
yeah pays better yeah colin jost gets 250250,000 a year to write for Wake Up Minzy.
None of his jokes make it.
No, no.
Minzy's like, no, that's not funny.
I can't remember him.
He's a special boy.
How was the 24-hour stream?
It was good.
Max and Hank lost their minds.
They got increasingly aggravated and it was
kind of like the stanford prison experiment yeah where like every time we went in they were more
delusional um max did not sleep at all hank slept a little bit uh but yeah they were they were losing
it i we we went did so we taped part of my take on Thursday,
and we made them keep a balloon up in the air for the entire time we were taping it.
And the chat had –
Are you a bad guy?
No.
That was funny.
That was – I mean, it was a punishment.
They lost.
I'm going to have to eat 24 pancakes soon.
Oh, that sucks.
Yeah.
That's going to suck.
I'm going to have to do basically the same thing, sit in a room.
Do you have a time?
It's the challenge.
The Waffle House thing?
24 hours and have to eat.
Every pancake takes an hour off.
Oh, you have to do – oh.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It doesn't sound too hard, but I'm sure it is.
It's going to suck.
Why don't you do it with him, Kyle?
Once you get past –
Go to Gatlinburg, Tennessee.
More pancake houses than dumbbells.
That's true. Run that back. I said that one. Yeah. I to Gatlinburg, Tennessee. More pancake houses than dumbbells. That's true.
Run that back.
I said that one.
Yeah.
I thought I kept that in my notes.
Oh, no.
You crushed it the first time.
Well, yeah.
They.
So.
Yeah.
They got so sleep deprived that the chat was then fucking with them.
So we finished part of my take and I looked at the chat and the whole comment section
was calling me Hitler.
What?
And I went in there and they're like, what's going on here, guys?
And they're like, well, the chat told us that you made a poll
to keep us in here even longer.
I'm like, we didn't.
Like, okay, well, we got duped.
So there was a lot of that going on where they were like back and forth
with the chat, but it was funny.
It was very funny content.
And the room smelled so bad.
Oh, yeah.
They were eating chili, right?
Yeah, well, we had Donnie make food that only makes you fart.
Can we just steal that?
I love that dudes just start stinking.
Yeah, well, we do owe a 12-hour stream for the people.
Yeah.
I want to run back Stinky Cloud so badly.
I know.
I do love farting. Max. I love farting. Actuallyinky Cloud so badly. I know. I do love farting.
Max.
I love farting.
Actually, Max should do the challenge today.
Yeah.
He could be good.
How's the toe?
Max, we were talking about the 24-hour stream.
They asked if I was a bad guy.
You're a bad guy.
I'm a bad guy?
I don't think I fucked with you that bad.
You're aging like Obama.
We did a lot of stuff.
Like at the beginning of his of his presidency yeah hank hank thought we were gonna fuck with him the whole
time all we did was basically give activities like we made them build some ikea furniture
yeah no the activities weren't weren't that bad um it was it was just the lack of sleep and the
no chairs the no chairs was crazy wait there was crazy. Wait, there was no chairs?
That wasn't my decision.
That wasn't my decision.
That's torture.
You guys know what this carpet is like.
It was basically sitting on cement for 24 hours.
That was the worst part.
Our backs were fucked.
Yeah, that sucks.
How long did you sleep for afterwards?
Oh, after?
A lot.
We had to do the show after had that we had to do the
show after so i had to do the show and then edit the show so i got home at like two o'clock friday
night and then i slept until 10 30 or 11 like made breakfast i was up for like an hour and i
went back to sleep until 5 p.m so i don't even know i i don't i don't know how long that is but i got some sleep
yeah i bet it was some good sleep though yeah it was a very max was the mvp because max didn't
complain hank was a complainer max just dealt with it that picture of you with the baby at like
five in the morning that was so i did tj those the hours when like hank fell asleep until he woke up and it was just me and the chat
it was just like i've never done like a stream like that before but it's just like a lot of
reliance on the chat and just trying to say words so that there's 4 000 people like there's 4 000
concurrence at like 4 30 in the morning which is that's insane insane was there any mvp chat member like someone who stuck around the whole time i like don't remember like it was going
so fast you couldn't like read the the usernames just like the content that like they were saying
next to it my favorite running max bit is that he's been pretty sick for like 11 months yeah oh yeah i'm aging i'm aging i'm aging a lot since i've taken over this bnt job
yeah last night he had it bad too he was yeah it's always bad
yeah you're all right yeah you've been stuffy for a while you've been coughing and stuffy for a very
very long time my cough is under control but there was a good two and a half months
where I just was sick and not getting any better.
And I just kept going to the doctor,
and they were like, yeah, you just got allergies.
I was like, I don't think this is allergies.
And then it just went away.
That looks like full in the morning.
We gave him two babies he had to keep alive.
Oh, like simulation babies?
Yeah, he didn't do anything.
Yeah, you didn't do anything with them.
I put a diaper on at first, and that was it.
But I don't think we, we didn't fuck with you guys that much.
No.
No, not at all.
Yeah, you could have had that.
No, that was him just in the morning.
No, we didn't, like, the only thing that I could say was, there was two things that I
could say were, were borderline torture.
One was, I made Frank make a Christmas video where he was just ranting and raving
and I played that at like 8 in the morning.
That was actually torture for the chat. Yeah, that was fine
with me because... It was like funny
to watch. I could just lay down
and not have to do anything. And the other
was we put a cricket
in the ceiling so it would just...
A cricket sound would go off every 5 minutes.
Well, that wasn't bad until it broke.
And then it was... It went from every five seconds to just constant cricket, cricket, cricket, cricket, cricket, cricket.
It just started spazzing out.
Yeah, but the only thing that really sucked was the no sleep.
And the no chair.
And the no chair.
That was not my decision.
And then they gave us Ikea furniture.
That was also insane.
The whole dresser debacle.
Do we have that clip, TJ?
I don't know if you can find it.
Max thought he built the whole.
It took me six hours to build this dresser.
And it just crumbled.
There was a moment I was like, yes, I did it.
All I have to do is put these final pieces together,
and I'm going to be done.
Success.
And then I put it together, and it just all crumbled.
Three seconds.
I feel like you got a lot of Max fans
from that. Yeah, and then
last night.
We needed another bad moment to just
bring me right back down and be like, okay, this guy
sucks again.
Are you
foreign? No. Are you foreign?
No.
In any way?
He's Italian.
I can't wait for that clip.
Somebody send that to me.
Every Che tweet, I'm responding.
Where do you think he's from?
I was just studying his face.
I was like, he might have something.
No, he's very Italian.
He uses his hands. When he gets mad at us, he. No, he's very Italian. He uses his hands.
When he gets mad at us, he goes, fuck off with these hands.
Like, fuck off.
Yeah, that's it.
Yeah.
All right, you want to do the yak challenge later?
Sure.
All right, I'll text you.
Have you come in.
I don't know, TJ, if you find the clip of the dresser.
It was so fucking fun.
I was in the chat at one point trying to get him to build the anus dresser that we got in.
Oh.
You were dreading that.
Turned out fine.
You built it?
No, Reed.
Reed.
Yeah, I was on a bus to Louisville.
Reed's 2024 is Reed.
Reed's a good basketball player.
He keeps on bumping into this guy named Reed at different bars every weekend. They love each other so much, but they refuse to get each other's phone number.
What? They have to. bars they love each other so much but they refuse to get each other's phone number what yeah they
have to they just keep on bumping into each other at bars and he'll send us a picture whenever he
bumps into reed yeah they do they gotta fuck it out they gotta fuck it out yeah next time you do
the 24-hour stream you need like a a vote situation where they're delirious and they can vote to get
out five hours early but if they both vote that they have to stay
five like yeah some sort of dynamic like that we're like like well we did let them out yeah
like the money at the end of the producer bowl where yeah they both if they both take the deal
then it actually fucks them both yeah they did have solidarity because at the end of the like
at like five o'clock i i put a thousand dollars on the table and they made them play madden and
i was like winner gets a,000 and gets to leave.
And Hank won, took the $1,000, but he decided to stay with Madden.
And we let him out like an hour and a half early.
Yeah, you're not Hitler at all.
No, man.
Listen, if I lost, PFT and I would have been in there.
They would have been able to do the same shit to us.
I'll do it.
Again, I'm going to have to do the pancakes. It us i'll do i'll do i mean again i'm gonna have to do the pancakes it's
gonna fucking suck yeah that is gonna be a i mean it won't be as long because it shouldn't take 24
hours but it will probably be like 10 12 hours in a room what's the pancake punishment look at that
oh my god uh the we did a pancakes only league uh you get a point for every pancake. You each draft five offensive linemen.
And I'm in second to last right now.
So, not looking good.
What's going on with our fantasy league?
Who's in last there?
Oh, yeah.
Good question.
There were a lot of 50-yard field goals yesterday.
Yeah, there were.
I bet nobody has that Dallas kicker.
So, as of last – it doesn't update until the Monday games are over,
but Kate was back in last.
It looks like the final – the loser's bracket is almost solidified.
So that was –
Do I get $1,000 if I win the league?
The winner gets $1,000.
Yeah.
I got to collect money for the league.
Oh, speaking of which –
I was making that up.
No, I did say that I'd give $1,000 to the winner.
So speaking of which, we have a merch bonus that we should spin the wheel for,
for the book.
Oh.
Yeah.
So someone will get a ticket.
Don't put me on it, TJ, but everyone else.
Yeah, yeah.
Someone will get $1,250.
Nice.
One wheel or elimination?
Elimination.
Okay.
That's fair, right?
I don't know. Do you all like elimination for something like this? I do. I think elimination. It's fair, right? I don't know. Do y'all like elimination for something like this?
I do. I need to see
I like elimination.
Let's spin the wheel and get a name.
If it lands on Brandon, he can't even be
on the elimination wheel.
No, he can't.
We're going to eliminate somebody from the elimination wheel?
Let's do that.
Yeah.
Okay, then put me on that wheel.
The elimination.
Yeah.
Good job by everyone.
Oh, can we do the High Noon ad?
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Love High Noon. Love high noon.
It's delicious.
Mook, how was Louisville?
Oh, yeah, Louisville.
Louisville.
Yeah, it was an interesting weekend.
Why?
What happened?
How was Louisville?
You have to say it like you have a dick in your throat.
Did they police that?
Did they enjoy doing that?
Yeah, I went up.
You're hosting.
You're like, Louisville.
And they're like, nah.
They have fun with that.
Get them fired up.
You don't have a dick in your throat.
Yeah, that's what they say.
I can make it happen.
It was an interesting weekend.
I took a Greyhound bus.
You and Sass.
There and back.
Wait, why?
From Chicago to Louisville?
Yeah.
How long was that?
Seven hours there, six back.
Why?
Pretty brutal.
You know, we're saving money at Little Sasquatch LLC.
Wait, was it?
Did Sass fly?
Yeah.
Wait.
How much is a bus ticket?
Yeah, how much money did you save?
Like 80 bucks.
And then flying.
There and back?
Yeah.
Flying would have been like 600 oh i'm a team guy
that doesn't make sense you should at least do a mega bus you should have rented a car i like to i
can't drive what like literally or what i just like haven't driven a car in like five years
oh so you can drive if you're gonna be on the road you need to be able to drive
no i like the bus dude i like being a man of the people
i don't think you do that's not a man of the people oh yeah it was those aren't called coping
you're coping right now it was me and like yeah this is nice i like this it keeps it keeps you
in touch it keeps you like oh these people are what was the high miserable what and how is that
different than being on a plane with people it's a different class it's a different world that's true fair
you know i was on the bus with like 30 migrants and you know it was interesting okay very
interesting but on the way back i had a racist bus driver it was a it was towards which race
mexicans oh it was it was black on mexican crime oh it was i'm out i'm you know i'm gonna sit my ass down and listen yeah
hear him out it was insane uh he threw a guy off the bus because his phone wasn't charged
and he couldn't show him his ticket oh my god and the guy was like i like what am i gonna do
like i gotta i'm not gonna do the accent but you kind of did you did yeah i could tell your toe
i did yeah i'm walking should line. Should I try this?
Well, you didn't kick him off because his phone wasn't charged.
You kicked him off because you couldn't show him his ticket.
The guy was already on the bus before, so he was re-boarding.
Oh, my God.
Yeah.
And the Mexican guy called him a stupid shit.
And he was dropping, the bus drivers started dropping slurs.
Oh, man.
And then when we got to Chicago.
Were you sitting front seat?
I was like 2A.
That's a weirdo move.
No, I want to be as close as possible to the front of that bus.
Okay.
The lights go off.
You don't know what's going to happen.
Okay.
And.
So you want them in the back of the bus.
Did you have somebody right next to you?
No.
No, I did.
I do the move where I put my backpack next to me people kind of like
gravitate away from me on those yeah they're like I'm gonna leave that boy alone yeah and then we
got to Chicago it was me and two Spanish dudes and I got my luggage out of the bottom of the
Greyhound and they they were kind of like waiting around for direction and the bus driver like
closed the trunk of the bus.
And they were like, oh, we didn't get our bags.
And he was like, you're still kind of doing an accent.
It's a little different.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And then he was like, I don't give a shit.
And he drove away with their luggage.
What the fuck?
It was crazy, dude.
What?
They were like, we're moving across.
Oh, whoa.
What the fuck, SA?
They were like, aye, aye, aye, stop. Caramba. Hombre. moving across oh oh what the fuck sa yeah like iii stop caramba uh but yeah he i witnessed uh
two racisms and uh yeah it was a good it was an okay weekend yeah it was a stay in the hotel
just two racisms that was pretty good pretty good yeah they were extreme racisms so sass was all
like he was rested because he flew?
Mm-hmm.
First class, probably.
He got upgraded to Comfort Plus.
He let me know about that.
Shit.
He got there quick, I bet.
Yeah, he was two hours in and out.
First lap on the way back.
Yeah, I was 6 a.m. on the way there,
and then by the time I pulled up, I struck out looking on the yak.
Oh.
With a ball derby.
Oh, man.
The best part was, though, the bus back, I got on it at like 3 a.m.,
and then I just woke up in Chicago.
That's not bad.
Yeah.
But I spent 2 a.m. to 3 a.m. outside of Greyhound Station,
where I shouldn't have been.
Demon hours.
Really?
In Louisville?
In Louisville.
Yikes.
But thanks to everyone that came out to the shows.
They were good shows?
Good shows.
How many shows did you do?
Four?
Four, yeah.
Who's their star?
Jack Harlow.
Muhammad Ali.
Oh, yeah, Jack Harlow.
Muhammad Ali?
Yeah.
I didn't know that.
Yeah.
Louis Tomlinson from One Direction would rep Louisville on his flat brim.
Jennifer Lawrence.
Her too?
That's a good list.
Sluggers.
Oh, are they out of the Yum brand?
Oh, the Churchill Downs, right?
Yeah.
I was talking about people, and now you're just saying.
Is Papa John from Louisville?
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
Yeah, because remember he did the switch where he became a Kentucky fan?
Yeah.
And he canceled him?
I'm working on a project.
The United States of touchdowns.
Okay.
Go on.
Every touchdown score in the NFL.
Keep marking down their hometown and home state
and seeing who has the most going to make a heat map.
Fuck yes.
See Rico Dowdle last night?
Plus 400 had that.
Had what?
Rico Dowdle.
Anytime?
Oh, I had him on a parlay.
And it was a review.
It was electric.
Where is he from?
No idea.
How are you compiling this data?
Are you saying it out loud so somebody else does it?
I'm keeping track of my notes up.
So what do you got right now?
Where's Debo Samuel from?
Off the top, he's from South Carolina.
Asheville, North Carolina is Rico Dowdle.
Miami's in the lead.
Yeah.
Then Houston, Atlanta.
Daytona Beach.
St. Louis, Denver. Strictly from McCaffrey. yeah then houston atlanta daytona beach yeah st louis denver strictly from mccaffrey
states florida crushes everyone else and texas california georgia louisiana nothing crazy
nothing remotely interesting you're gonna keep kind of just stuck doing it yeah i'd like to uh
visualize that data for you you send it to me can you do that yeah get out of old excel fingers out hell yeah but earth chart beautiful
love that all right tg you got the bonus wheel
is this a real thing yeah we hit i mean we hit a bonus we've done this before when we get like
we get 1200 bucks it would be weird if we split it and everyone got $100.
Yeah.
We'll just randomly have someone.
Who won it last time?
Zah won one.
Zah won one.
Yeah, but you took the money from Zah.
Yeah, I did.
See, that's mine.
So you got $12,000 once.
Yeah, I guess I did.
That still doesn't get talked about enough.
We tried our best to fuck him over in multiple, multiple ways.
We could have just not.
Look at him.
Oh.
Jay, that tweet last night about the spilling grape soda,
was that a contest to see most boring tweet?
I thought it was a good joke.
Oh, it was a joke?
What was it?
I really did spill seltzer.
Wait, that was a joke?
What was it?
I thought that was a joke. I wasn did spill seltzer. Wait, that was a joke? What was it? I thought that was...
I didn't know it was a joke.
I wasn't familiar with your game.
I knocked over my can and spilled some grapefruit-flavored seltzer on my rug.
I was afraid it would be sticky or leave a smell, so I just poured some unflavored seltzer.
Wow.
You stopped me in my tracks when I saw it last night.
The two people that bookmark it Need to be in prison
I knocked over my can
What does that mean?
Can of seltzer
Why didn't you just say
I knocked over my seltzer?
That's fun
And spilled some great
You could have just said
Why did you say
That is the most stretched out sentence.
Yeah, I didn't know that was a joke.
I also don't think you have to explain the consequences of spilling something.
Or leave a smell.
I'm afraid it would be...
Or leave a smell.
63,000.
This is joke writing 101.
This is good.
You have poured some...
What are the people responding?
It's got some good bones, right?
How would that... No.
How would that stop it from being sticky, though?
If you poured more seltzer on it.
That thing's got no legs.
So I knocked over a can last night
and it had some grapefruit seltzer
in it all over my rug.
I was a little afraid it would be
sticky or even smell.
And so what I did...
That internet Hall thing.
Go on.
I poured some unflavored
seltzer on it.
Oh shit.
That's good. That's
really good.
I liked it. It always has my fucking back.
Alright yeah spin the wheel
TJ. Yeah that was
that stopped me. I didn't know that was a joke. I apologize it. He always has my fucking back. All right, yeah, spin the wheel, TJ. Yeah, that was, that stopped me.
I didn't know that was a joke.
I apologize, Steven.
Apology accepted.
We're just taking him at his word that it was a joke?
Definitely.
Where would I steal a joke from?
Jay, can you make that a tip?
No one said you stole that joke.
You didn't steal it.
No one's ever made that joke.
That was a true one-of-one joke.
You stole that from Bill Burr, dude.
That's not something where you can be like parallel minds.
Wait, did Chase steal this?
Yeah.
I think I saw Louis C.K. do this at Madison Square Garden.
Fucking ripped him off.
Fuck.
All right, let's spin it.
All right, so somebody's getting $1,200.
$1,250.
Or one spin.
No, it's elimination.. All right, so somebody's getting $1,200. $1,250. Or one spin. No, it's elimination.
Elimination.
Okay.
I hope Moog's first.
I will be.
Yep.
No.
Oh, Big Cat, celebrate.
Zah.
He got a bonus.
He got the bonus last time.
Yeah, and he got $500 today.
I gave it to him after the whole moment.
I don't think so.
I didn't see the exchange.
Ja, confirm or deny?
I can do neither.
Oh, you fuck!
Fuck!
You fuck.
Good.
That's justice.
Justice.
This wheel might be moot.
You're on it.
We'll see.
No, I think you should... You told me to put you on it.
I think it's moot.
No, no.
Definitely not moot.
Definitely not moot.
You told me to put you on it. I think it's mood. You told me to put you on it.
Ah, shit.
This is for a book bonus. You could say I got a bonus.
I'm writing a book.
I think we should redo it.
Get me off.
There we go.
I would've just added to my villain arc.
Yeah. I think you should be just a huge dickhead.
My New Year's resolution is to be feared. Yeah. I think you should be just a huge dickhead. You're a villain.
My New Year's resolution is to be feared.
Fuck.
Damn.
All right, I'm pretty good with everyone who's left.
Pretty good.
No, I am.
Actually, I wouldn't be upset with anyone getting this now.
We got the me, Brandon, Chase out of the way.
Listen, Kate hadn't been here in like two months.
Where's she been? She wrote the book.
She was part of the book.
I think she wrote the longest chapter.
Yeah.
She's a woman.
What's that mean?
I don't know.
Wouldn't it be right?
It would be right.
You know they'd be talking.
Oh, Moog.
All right.
Come on, Moog.
My heart's aching.
It's right there for the taking, Moog.
We all know how this ends, dude. Let's go Mook. We all know how this ends, dude.
We all know how this ends.
Just go get it, Mook.
Come on.
Mook!
Yes!
All right, best of four.
Best of seven.
If you get it four times, you win.
Don't think about Kate.
You go take that money from that woman on maternity leave.
Just go.
Get it four times, you win. Root for yourself woman on maternity leave. Just go root for yourself.
One for Moog.
No, root for yourself.
You're flying.
Go on, Moog.
I can't root for myself.
It's all right.
Kate should have to do diapers for a month.
Yeah, it's fine.
She can do the ones you wash.
Moog.
Oh, no.
What if he shuts her out?
A reverse sweep would be hilarious.
Take food out of that baby's mouth, Moog.
Moog's in the chat.
Moog's in the chat.
Come on, Moog. Come on, Moog. The bonus. Now, Kate has to shit's mouth, Mook. Mook's in the chat. Mook's in the chat. Come on.
The bonus. Now Kate has to shit
herself if she gets swept. Okay, 2-1.
She probably would
anyway. She would, yeah.
2-1. Alright, that was our first setback.
You were running hot. You were
running too hot. Get us 3-1.
Get us 3-1. Oh my god. There we go.
Everyone leave. It's over.
Mook. Mook. It's over.. It's over. Mook. Mook. It's over.
Oh, this is bad karma. Mook. Mook.
I'm sorry, Kay.
She had a kid.
Pay him!
There we go!
Yeah!
Fuck yes, Mook!
Yeah. Alright, so I'll text Pilar right now.
But Big Cat was on the wheel, so we should.
It was a moot wheel.
No, I think a fun thing we could do is we could pull up your favorite charity, give it all.
Yeah.
Yeah, we could do that.
Let's do it live on air.
That would be huge.
I would have.
For the $1,200.
I just want to say, I would have given mine to charity.
Same.
Yeah.
I would have mashed all of yours as well to charity.
I feel like I got to give some money to Kate.
No, stop, Mook.
You just took the gray out of Louisville.
You just spent 14 hours.
All right, yeah, I'm down.
Shut up, dude.
I'll take a win.
Take a win.
That's a win.
That's a win.
All right.
It's a huge win.
Billy and Donnie are going back to Africa this week, right?
Oh, that's so soon.
Wow.
To play Kenya again?
Yeah.
What chapter did you write, Luke?
The devious hobgoblin chapter.
See, that's an award-winning chapter.
Yeah, it was a good chapter.
Thank you.
That's life-changing money right there.
You might retire.
I'm about to start acting different.
Yeah.
You could put it all on a first touchdown tonight.
Oh.
You should.
Oh, now we're talking.
You should. Now we're talking. That could be seven grand on a first touchdown tonight. Oh. You should. Oh, now we're talking. You should.
Now we're talking.
That could be seven grand in a sliver.
What's the pick?
Tyreek?
Tyreek?
What's the pick?
Put it on three legs like a camera.
A tripod.
Yeah, like a camera on a tripod.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Who should I tell?
That was an unfortunate explanation back to me.
Yeah, like a camera on a tripod. I can't winanation Camera on a tripod
I can't win
I don't get clear dubs
Who's playing?
There's two games
Put it in two and put it on two firsts
Other team
Don't do this to us
Do anytime
Now I'm feeling dangerous
Do anytime
Enjoy your 1200 This is the best way to enjoy it By doubling it Do this. Do anytime. Now I'm feeling dangerous. Do anytime. Anytime?
Enjoy your $1,200.
Put it on. I really, yeah.
This is the best way to enjoy it, by doubling it.
Maybe tripling it, but Tommy DeVito.
Put it on DeVito, yeah.
Put it on DeVito.
Imagine if he scored.
Oh, my.
The ultimate meatball player.
That'd be the top moment of your life.
That is true.
You're a meatball guy.
Meatball guy.
He got you paid.
Oh, God. Put half true. Your meatball guy. Meatball guy. He got you paid. Oh, God.
Put half of it on the meatball guy.
I'm buzzing right now. Anytime. Not
first. Yeah, anytime. Not first. Ride it out.
Okay. It's probably good odds. All 1,200?
No. No, no half.
300 on that. It's probably plus. Put whatever
leaves you enough so that you can take a flight
next time.
Yeah, no. It was more of like a, I'll sacrifice, I'll follow my, I don't mind a bus.
You probably should, though.
You keep saying that.
That's a worse look that you don't mind it.
I'm a man of the people.
You keep saying that.
Yeah, more people probably fly than take a bus.
Tommy DeVito's plus 500.
None of those people want to be on the bus either.
Plus 500.
Oh, that's a payday.
Oh, man. You could be sitting with
five grand plus
six grand. Oh, stop that.
Oh, stop that.
Five grand.
I think two is plus 800.
Alright, let's see.
Hold on.
I like that. I like the QB
anytimes. Me too.
Tommy.
Damn, Mook, that would be awesome.
Hold on.
1,200 is already, like, fascinating to me.
Like, 1,200, I don't know what to do with.
That could last you a really long time.
Forever.
I could live off 1,200 forever.
Anytime touchdowns, Tommy DeVito
and
Tua.
What is that part?
$1,250 would pay you $66,000.
Moog.
Alright, guys.
You pretty much already have it.
That's more than double my salary.
You know what?
$66,000. That's more than double my salary. You know what? $66,000.
That'd be crazy.
Alright. We're bad people.
No.
I don't know what to do with my hands right now.
Mook, I just put it in for you. If it hits, you get $30,000.
Are you serious? Yeah.
Yeah. Holy shit.
Let's fucking go.
Anytime touchdown, Tommy DeVito to a parlayed.
If it hits, you get $30,000. Now you don't have to waste your money.
Wow.
Alright, let's get it oh my god this is exciting thank you big cat holy shit hi jesus christ oh 50 to win 67 000 i thought i was gonna have a chill night tonight
did us trying to convince mook convince you yes yeah 100 well because it doesn't take much to
convince if you say a pick out loud like if Mook did that and I didn't,
I'd be like, motherfucker.
Right, you got to.
We said it.
Do they have to cross the line themselves or is passing touchdown?
No, they have to cross.
It's not going to hit.
Let's be honest, it's not going to hit.
DeVito has a couple, I think.
Tua is the hard part.
Tua might have.
Well, both are very hard.
Let's be honest.
Both are pretty much impossible.
But if they both hit, I will give you 30 grand cash.
So you don't have to pay tax.
Holy shit, Mook.
I'm hard.
So you'll be walking out of this office that's Google-able with 30 grand cash in your pocket.
We'll do a bank exchange.
DeVito seems like a guy that you could kind of maybe talk to him about it.
Yeah, I feel like you could reach out.
DM him real quick.
Yeah.
Hey, dude, need you to run one in.
For the meatballs.
All right, I'm thrilled now, too.
I'm excited to watch.
This is going to be insane.
Because I'd also win 30.
Yeah.
Are you streaming tonight?
No.
We might have to.
If Tommy DeVito scores a touchdown if i might have
to go over to your apartment okay oh my god that would be the best that would be a lot of time
i might yeah because yeah the apartment's in rough shape or you might come to my house
you come to my house they're at the same time right they're not same time if uh say tommy
scores really quick what would the cash out be?
We're not cashing out.
We don't cash out.
We don't cash out.
Mook.
We don't cash out.
You get no cash out.
Okay.
We don't cash out.
We ride.
30 grand?
We ride.
All right, so if Tommy DeVito scores, you have to come to my house.
Deal.
And then we'll stream on Twitter,'ll stream – I don't know how –
we'll stream on Twitter, I guess.
Or, yeah, live.
One of you guys.
I'm going to watch the game here because I don't have cable,
so I'm going to watch this live.
Jason.
All right, so then I'll – no, if he scores, then I'll come here.
I need you to get – I need you to get this money.
Yeah, me too.
This would be incredible.
What an all-time hit it would be. It's not going to happen. Let's be realistic. It's not going to happen. It is. It's not going to happen. This would be incredible. What an all-time hit it would be.
It's not going to happen.
It's not going to happen.
It is.
It's not going to happen.
Be realistic.
If I become a rich guy.
I just need one of them to score.
I know.
Just give us a chance.
Preferably in the first quarter.
If Tua scores first, that would be the electric thing.
Oh, my God.
We're going to watch DeVito.
A pass interference in the end zone, and then Tua gets a sneak.
That would be the truly electric thing.
So the numbers. Has Tua ever scored a touchdown? Yes, yes then Tua gets a sneak, that would be the truly electric thing. So the numbers...
Has Tua ever scored a touchdown?
Yes, yes.
Tua this year.
Tua has not scored this year or last year on the ground.
However, the prior two years,
he scored three rushing touchdowns each year.
He has 27 carries.
Yeah, but with the confessions...
But they've been taking care of him.
Oh, man.
Yeah.
Tommy DeVito has one rushing touchdown this year.
Oh.
I believe
It's pretty much a guarantee not to hit
But
I'm going to DM DeVito
But at least now you don't have to bet your own money on it
Because it wasn't going to hit
Yeah thank you
Because that would have bummed me out if you had bet it
And it's like they never even had a chance
Oh I'm fired up
Quarterbacks always have a chance
Because they can get in a scramble
And you can get the pass interference
Love that
The sneak
Yeah
Okay
I have a good feeling
I'm certainly not putting my money on it
Let's do a backup one too
I want you to win
Let's do it
What one actually makes sense
Two players But it has to be good money two, Mook. I want you to win. Let's do it. What one actually makes sense?
Two players, but it has to be good money.
Yeah, KB, I need you to cook right now, brother.
Do you want me to give you some team stats right now?
Sure. The Giants have given up
the fourth most rushing touchdowns
to running backs. 1.0
per game to running backs.
Okay, so AJ Dillon. The Packers
are also in the top 10 giving up rushing touchdowns.
So Dorsey Levins.
So if we do A.J. Dillon and who?
What was the Packers stat?
Waddle?
Packers give up.8 rushing touchdowns per game this season,
and they're the ninth most in the NFL.
Giants' fourth most.
I feel like we're in the weeds now.
Yeah, what about Titans-Dolphins, Che?
Four, five, six.
The Titans give up the seventh most touchdowns to wide receivers
in the NFL, one per game.
All right, here's what we're going to do.
We're going to do A.J. Dillon, Jalen Waddle, and Tyree Kill.
Love it.
And we're going to do, if that hits, I'll give you five grand cash.
Okay.
Wow.
Okay.
Holy shit.
This is wild.
You've got a lot going on tonight.
I need to see Mook.
I kind of want to watch Mook on stream.
They're streaming from New York.
Can you go live on Instagram?
Yeah.
Can we go live on the Yak?
Yeah.
I'll take a Greyhound to New York right now.
Wait. Can we go live on the yak yeah i'll take a greyhound to new york right now wait can we go live on the yak tj i don't i don't know if i want to step on toes there if they're screaming well i think what
we would do is if we can get it set up we would just say if if we get if like tommy devito scores
or if like aj dylan if we get like two of the go live yeah if you get halfway there on either of
them you can go live. Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean, we do it on the Yak.
We'll do it on the Yak YouTube.
So it's not stepping on so's.
There's a gambling YouTube.
And Yak fans will get to tune into this.
But how can we make this torture for Mook?
Can he only watch the game cast?
The balloon?
Yeah.
Yeah.
He's got to keep it up.
Otherwise he just gets none of the money.
You have to.
Yeah.
Fuck it.
All five of them score. he did just he drops a
balloon if all five of them score you get both you get 35 holy shit oh yeah what are you gonna
do with your money you think dude i don't know you should start spending it now this is thrilling
i'm excited i'm very excited i don't know what i would do uh it's a.j dylan a.j dylan
so there's there's the one bet is a.j dylan jalen waddle tyree kill if that hits he gets
five grand cash if tommy devito and two hits he gets 30 grand cash i love that i think i'm
gonna put one in for just all all of. Every player to score. Everybody scores.
Every single player to score.
I don't even.
I got to take a walk real quick.
I'm going to take a walk.
Well, baseline, you've got 1,200 in your pocket.
Yeah.
1,200 you didn't have this morning.
Huge.
Yeah.
All right.
So, yeah.
And we will not step on toes toes so we will not be streaming unless
we're like one oh that's a pretty good suggestion if you want to turn this into a torture device is
have him only get game updates by watching the new york stream oh so he can't watch the games
he has to just watch the new york gambling case i think as soon as maybe one player scores that's
i don't want to it, they're doing a stream.
I do not want to do competitive streams.
I think it just has to be...
We could also just do clips.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, let's just do clips.
So if a couple of them score, I will come to the office,
and we will...
Can we just, TJ, make sure we have someone here
who can film Moog?
Yeah.
And we'll just have clips. That works. While he's gone, how can we just, TJ, make sure we have someone here who can film Moog? Yeah. And we'll just have clips.
That works.
While he's gone, how can we get that $1,250 back?
From him?
Yeah.
Yeah, we should figure it out.
Let's beat the shit out of him.
Let's figure out how to get that $1,250 back.
He doesn't have it in a physical sense.
We can still beat the shit out of him, though.
The thing that sucks is I don't think any of these are going to hit.
We'll beat the shit out of him. He. The thing that sucks is I don't think any of these are going to hit. We'll beat the shit out of him.
He's getting $1,200 no matter what.
Yeah, that's true.
He got $1,250.
I think it's like a month's rent.
I think.
This is also all brought to you by Jaden Daniels winning the Heisman, so thank you to him.
Oh, wow.
Yeah, I mean, I'm flush right now, and when I'm flush, we do crazy shit.
Love it.
Can we buy a big statue for in here
yeah cool anybody else need anything for sure
chaps did come up to me the other day and was like hey i want to get um the like paintball
gun that shoots like rubber bullets yeah like a riot control gun i was like yeah cool
that's probably going to happen.
Tommy wants a full-size Braveheart sword.
Yes, let's do it.
All right.
Did he get sword envy when he was in the office?
Oh, yeah, a lot.
Yeah.
Just find me a link.
Like Fantasy Blades.
Dude, Spider is fucking easy right now.
He looks incredible.
Spider, you're going to have to do the Yak Challenge too.
Yeah, look how good he looks today.
Brought to you by Buddha Benz.
See the shoes?
Cotton candy.
What are those shoes?
You good, Mook?
Yeah, I have a stipulation if you want it.
Oh, but what?
You want like torture during it.
No, I don't want torture.
And also, we decided we're going to do clips.
So if a bunch of them hit, i'll come into the office and we'll
have someone filming us okay so if this hits i'll purchase one giant meatball like a life
like a life-size how are you gonna what does that mean you might need another walk i don't need a
walk man you came back a walk to come back with life-size meatball? Yeah.
Okay.
One more lap.
Okay.
Where do you get that?
And what does life-size mean for a food item?
Like a giant meatball.
Isn't every meatball a life-size meatball?
Every physical thing is life-size.
Yeah, life-size meatball.
Yeah, okay.
Never mind.
Yeah, I should go take another one.
Yeah, take a lap.
Take a lap.
Take a lap.
I don't think we need a torture element.
No, there is.
You're a guy who went to a Greyhound station at 2 a.m. in Louisville.
Watching.
Rides six hours back home.
Yeah.
Wow.
Also, the torture.
That's the torture.
The torture is that he thinks it's going to hit.
Yeah, he's convinced himself already.
I know this is not going to hit.
He's never hit.
He only thinks of meatballs.
That's all he's got.
Balls are his life.
Yeah, the torture already exists.
It's that he envisions a life where he doesn't have to show up at 2 a.m.
to get on a ground to ride from Louisville to Chicago.
Yeah.
And now it's gone.
He's playing like paying his rent and everything.
That's the torture.
Torture is coming.
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You should see if Nicky Smokes will watch the game with you.
There's the torture.
Yeah.
I'm down.
That is the torture.
We found the torture.
He's a good hype man, though.
Yeah, he'll watch it with you.
I'm sure he will.
Oh.
He died by getting a pole stuck real far up his ass, right?
Wasn't that his torture?
I thought they stretched him to death.
I thought they put a pole in his ass.
Scottish stretched him to death.
I'm never talking about Braveheart.
Yeah.
Did they just cut his neck?
No, they stretched him out.
Yeah, right?
Oh.
Look at how William Wallace died.
And then they cut out his inside like, they cut out his inside.
He sat on a pole.
I thought he had a pole went all the way in him.
They stretched him, though.
Did they stretch him?
Yeah, they were trying to get him to fall.
Was the entry point the asshole or what?
I mean, that's how you would stretch a man.
Oh.
Yeah.
Oh.
The standard way.
Disemboweled.
Disemboweled.
Yeah, they cut him.
They really tried to kill him.
They were mad.
They killed him a few times.
They were really mad.
So I guess the only thing they didn't do is what I said.
But he was hanged and decapitated.
And disemboweled.
And disemboweled.
At this point, the joke's on them, though.
Yeah.
They're just getting all gross.
They're playing with their food.
They're just getting gross.
That's true.
That's true. That's true.
Why did I think he got a pole in his ass?
What are you thinking?
Something else.
Luke, is this the biggest game of your life tonight?
Did I tell you the story?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Excited for you.
This is going to be.
It was a happy ending.
Excited.
This is going to be very fun.
Because I think the 2-0 Waddle, or theaddle, Hill, and Dillon has a real chance.
I think Dillon will score.
And, of course, the other two.
Yeah.
I take Waddle every week, and he's been kind of disappointing.
He doesn't have many touchdowns.
You need to get two out of the three in the first half because then you can focus.
Yeah.
Right.
Then you can lock in and really help the boys out.
Yeah.
Then you can just really get them on the right path.
Yeah.
Have you ever lost a bet because you weren't focused?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Over-unders, you slip up where it's like there's a lot of points in the first half.
You're like, we're good.
And you don't focus enough to realize that things happen.
It slowly slows it down.
You got to stay focused.
I think I prefer just checking the app play by play.
It's less of a sweat.
That's crazy.
You got to watch.
That's insane.
I'm kind of a cow.
There's moments where I just want to let it happen.
I feel like it's.
I'll check on it in a second.
That's crazy.
I feel it's a better hit percentage when I do it.
I don't know if I want to take an Adderall or a Xanax for this tonight.
Why not both?
Half and half, yeah.
Steven got testing with me yesterday in the gambling cave
because I said there was a flag on a play.
He got very upset.
Well, yeah, it was a third down, incomplete punt.
I'm celebrating.
And then you go, oh, flag.
And I don't even know if you saw it because the graphics on that game were horrendous.
But I don't know if you saw it or yeah but you're like oh flag
and yeah i got upset with you because you're putting some bad energy out in that moment it
was a flag not the one that you said but it was still a flag you said a true thing that happened
correct yeah he snapped at me it's nice to see see Stephen Shea kind of snap a little. That's what happens when our teams win the division.
Yeah, it sucks.
It's a bad division.
What if they win the Super Bowl?
They aren't.
Just get me a ticket to the dance.
You know what I want?
I want the Eagles.
To win?
No, I want the Eagles.
I want to play the Eagles.
You want to play the Eagles?
You want to play the Eagles?
Yep.
They're not very good.
No. Didn't you just get on Philly's good side Eagles? You want to play the Eagles? Yep. No, they're not very good. No.
Didn't you just get on Philly's good side again?
We're going through a low right now.
They stink.
Oh, imagine if Jalen Hurts got hurt in the first quarter against the Bucs in the playoffs.
What the heck?
CJ would actually have to worry about his life.
I want Jalen Hurts to be healthy, but I want to stomp the Eagles again in the playoffs.
You don't have the team to stomp anyone.
We'll see.
No.
No.
No.
Have they stomped?
No.
Guys.
If not stomped.
Guys.
He wins.
We'll see.
Yeah, he is right.
We will see.
You can't argue.
We'll see.
You don't have stompability.
Jay, will we see?
We will.
Indeed.
Well, not if you don't get to the playoffs.
I wish I hadn't helped him.
What if you don't get to the playoffs and we won't see? No, we will see. We'll just be. We if you don't get to the playoffs. I wish I hadn't helped him. What if you don't get to the playoffs and we won't see?
No, we will see.
We'll see if they get to the playoffs.
Yeah.
You know, his playoffs have been clinched by him in his head.
Not yet.
The graphic last night was awesome on Sunday Night Football, though.
Oh, my God.
Were you in the hunt?
Oh, I guess you were in it.
No, we were in it, yeah.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, it's a monster.
We've built a monster.
How about Zach Wilson outperforming the best quarterbacks in the world?
I know.
He played good yesterday.
He played damn good.
That was a weird game.
He's played better.
Nothing, nothing in the half, and it's 36?
Played damn good.
He might be next up.
Has he?
He saved his career. Is he still eligible for next up? Yeah, I think so. Is it his He might be next up. Has he? He saved his career.
Is he still eligible for next up?
Yeah, I think so.
Is it his third year?
Next up.
You see fields to the Steelers trade rumors?
Ooh.
Or next year?
Ooh.
Yeah.
Ooh.
I think you should like that.
You should.
Yeah?
I think with a – I mean, he's okay now.
Yeah, he's not bad.
And he goes back and forth.
I think if you got him a good offensive coordinator, he could be something.
Yeah. I still like Kenny. I don't like kenny small hands smells of cabbage
smells of cabbage carnies all right so who's gonna do it spider and max should we spin our
wheel first tj because i think we have a pretty tough wheel today yeah i think it's getting pretty
bare bones i think we might be in trouble. Oh, God. Oh, wow.
Yeah.
We spun twice on Thursday, both tried, because we didn't spin one on Friday.
Oh, wow.
So I didn't want people to get upset about that.
Honor.
That's how much the chat owns our life.
They run the show.
They do.
They are the executive producers of this show.
Oh, no.
I'll quit.
I will quit.
That's what I will do.
Wait, did you see that video of the cash grab with mouse traps in it?
I think that's actually the video I saw to then first think of doing it. Do the mouse trap.
Yeah.
Got it.
But we should do that game.
That looks fun.
All right, so spin to see who's going to get their little thing.
It's happened to me twice.
Has it?
That's right.
Me twice, TJ once.
You know what?
We can take it off after this. After this one, we'll take it off. Yeah, you want to take it off, Brandon? Brandon, it's not going, TJ once. You know what? We can take it off after this.
After this one, we'll take it off.
Yeah, you want to take it off, Brandon?
Brandon, it's not going to be you.
Yeah.
Also, this part of it saved your life, man.
It got you medicated.
And your life has gone.
Your life has been incredible.
No, I'm not medicated anymore.
I quit.
You quit it?
Yeah, you don't remember?
Yeah.
So I get a pussy.
Oh, you couldn't get your dick hard?
My dick wasn't working.
Yeah, my dick quit working too, but I just pulled it over.
Well, my dick is back with a fucking vengeance.
For real.
Yeah.
So actually, you should be thanking us.
You must be absolutely destroying but sad the whole time.
No, I'm just-
It's like you tried to get rid of me.
You're browning with the hardest cock.
Yeah, it's a villain arc.
You motherfucker, you tried to get rid of me.
No, we're brothers.
I'm going to fucking come everywhere now.
We're pals.
I think it was like a nice hard reset with, you know, unplug, plug it back in.
It's working real well now.
Yeah.
I just, yeah, I got about a month in and I realized I'm just not, I had no energy or nothing.
Your dick probably needed some time off too.
It did.
Just a month in the hole.
It did.
Yeah.
Well, out of it.
Out of it.
Out of the hole.
Yeah.
Fucking Malasek.
What the fuck?
Was your first boner back?
Was it like, did it hurt?
I don't even remember it.
It was so quick.
Back, boys.
It was almost immediate, like blinking your eyes.
Yeah.
We're back.
We did it.
The first beer back.
Yeah. Gave it a high five. Boner relapse. What's up, player? we're back you did it the first beer back yeah
gave it a high five
boner relapse
what's up player
I've been sober for months
I didn't know you were here
boner sober
I'm not getting a boner
in January
I'm doing soft January
soft January
yeah
I'm down for soft January
should we do soft January
yeah
like five bucks
in a bucket
every time you get a boner.
Yep.
Dude, I could get back on that pill and it wouldn't be any problem.
No problem.
I mean, it just wasn't anything going on down there.
I love that you'd rather want to kill yourself and be hard than live soft and happy.
I'd rather not sleep.
Slippling anxiety.
Oh, I woke up at five o'clock and couldn't go back to sleep.
I was just, everything in my life was bothering me, but my dick was.
That morning would.
It was ready.
At least you had a friend with you.
Don't have to be sad alone.
Yeah, you don't have to go through this horrible life by yourself.
You got your boy with you.
Trusty old Brandon.
Can we sell Soft January to a sponsor yeah we should
all right we sold a wipe off yeah i think we could sell we could sell anything we should be
able to sell erections or lack thereof um okay is there like an anti-boner pill i think you could
just chastity belt it yeah because those keep you, yeah. Oh, that's got to be painful.
Oh, so painful.
Yeah, that's like, remember the sub-dom shit
we talked about maybe a month ago?
Oh, the Eagles guy?
No, that's security guard dom.
Not sub-dom.
How many people do you think in Philadelphia right now
are like, game would have been different
if dom was there?
Oh, like half of them at least.
Yeah.
75%, all the Italians. That game would have been different if Dom was there. Oh, like half of them at least. Yeah. 75% all the Italians.
That game sucked.
Yeah, you guys got whomped.
It's not very good.
You're not good.
It's a reset.
No, you're not.
It's a hard reset.
Like Brandon's dick.
Exactly.
The Eagles are my penis.
I think so.
Yeah.
Green.
Doing tush push. Yep. Doing tush push.
Yep.
Tush push.
Come on.
Come on.
Get in there.
And your wife's like,
ban this.
This place is dangerous.
Yeah, your penis is a lot like the Eagles
It really is
Cheesy
Cheese gunk
Something with
Hurts
Hurts so good
Alright
So we're mousetrapping?
Yeah
Max is on this wheel.
He was on the show today.
Yeah.
I don't like that Malice gets to warm up.
He's the worst.
Oh, Spider.
Spider also warming up right now.
All right, so this will be the finale of the mousetrap.
Eliminator.
The last one we ever do.
We'll see.
Maybe we'll add it to the name wheel, so they're still there, but it's very hard to get to.
What the fuck?
Luke's running.
Luke's gonna win both these fucking parlays tonight.
Hell yeah.
It can't be me again, right?
Brandon, chill. There's a lot of names left on there
Less arms less names every time really There you go, Brandon.
There I go, what?
Ah, fuck.
Damn.
That was me.
Oh, that was, yeah.
B and a B.
Do we have the mousetrap?
There you go, Brandon.
Oh, no, that's my bad.
No, this is good. Yeah
Brandon you're fucked
This sucks man. I'm sorry. There we go.
The good news is it's the finale.
It is the finale.
There he goes. Sit.
Stop.
Sit.
And good.
We have Max here, too.
Max.
Max, you might want to sit for this.
Yeah.
Hold on.
Sit down, Max.
He just goes, what the fuck?
No shot am I about to do this.
What the fuck is this?
This isn't wet.
This isn't wet.
It's not wet.
It's worse.
I think it's going to be worse.
Look at Brandon's fucking face.
You just got to put your hand in a mousetrap.
Process it.
That very one.
Process it.
What are your thoughts?
I hate you.
Those are my thoughts, is that every day I come into this place, I think about how much I hate you.
That was mean.
I'll do it for you, Max. No, I'll do it. No, I'll do it for you. I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll do mean. I'll do it for you, Max.
No, I'll do it.
No, I'll do it for you.
I'll do it, I'll do it, I'll do it.
I'll do it for you.
No, I won't do it.
I would like to champion for Brandon.
All right, Max says, so it's first to four, doesn't have to do it.
I can't read this wheel.
All right, let's go.
So I'm rooting for my name.
Yeah, yeah, you're 1-0.
You're up 1-0.
Yeah, I keep thinking it's going to be Brandon.
That's a shift.
This is the finale of Mousetrap, by the way.
We're taking it off the wheel after this.
Give it to me again.
What's the fuck, yeah, Brandon? What fuck? Shut up. What's the shutout?
Come on give it to me again
Baby that shit Dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, Keep going. Now it's 3-2. This is such bullshit. Yes. Brandon, it's not going to be you.
Are you?
Oh.
Oh.
Oh.
Give it to me.
There you go, Max.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I also love you.
You want to take back that you hate me?
No, I love you.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I'll do it.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I am Brandon. I will not do it for Brandon. I'll do it for Brandon. I will not do it for Brandon. I'll do it for Brandon. I'll do it for Brandon. I am Brandon.
It's our Rudy moment.
It's our Rudy moment.
I'll do it for Brandon.
I'll do it for Brandon.
All right, if everyone does it, Brandon doesn't have to do it.
Deal.
Everyone does it.
Let's go.
Wait, but one person, if you pussy out.
Yes.
If I'm like third in line and I pussy out.
Yes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I'll do it for Brandon.
It's a mousetrap.
I'll do it for Brandon.
We'll all do it for Brandon.
We'll all do it for Brandon.
It's our Rudy moment.
Let's go, Brandon.
I'm not doing it for Brandon.
You have to. Yeah, or then. We all have to do it for Brandon. Then he has to do. I'm not doing it for Brandon. You have to.
Yeah, or then...
We all have to do it for Brandon.
Then he has to do it three times.
We should do it on Max's toe.
No.
All right, bring it out.
Where's the mousetrap?
Set it.
We got a mousetrap?
Yeah, right there.
I just set it.
Oh, here we go.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Fuck.
Now, where should...
Just let me do it.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
We got you, Pa.
Wait, let me see the mousetrap.
Oh, that thing fires.
Are you done?
No, I'll do it again.
This is our coming together moment. Boys. We love you Brandon Tell Che that they're behind Titus' seat
Hello?
What's up?
Somebody tell Che that they're behind Titus' seat
Che, they're behind Titus' seat
Little mousy
Little curious mousy
It hurts so bad mousey little curious mousey
it hurts guys i'm gonna pussy out yeah i don't want to do it oh fuck so bad wait i don't want a freshie i don't want a freshie they're smack the hardest yeah yeah let's keep that one don't
get your nail on it oh i thought we can I thought we can puss you out at this point.
Oh, you can, you can.
Yeah.
Don't let your nail be on it.
Ow.
That's a fresh one.
We love you, Brandon.
Ow.
Thanks.
Fuck.
That hurts so bad.
Oh, that doesn't count.
Does that count?
No, you got to get your finger on there.
Brandon, no.
Just get the meaty part of your finger.
Don't get your nail.
Yeah, go meat.
You think like middle?
I just got, yeah, I got fucking all nail.
Oh, fuck.
Titus has these again.
Titus is so nice.
I love him.
Oh, here we go.
Ow!
I know, I want to get it over with too.
Nobody pussy out.
Little mousy.
Little, little mousy.
Here we go.
Did not.
Damn.
You're good.
That was.
Mine got fucked up.
Oh, it's hurt now?
I might lose my tail from this
It's like sore
Yeah
Oh dude
Do you have like a blood blister under there?
Yeah
That was bad
Oh that thing blew up
Yeah that was bad
I do it for my guy Brandon
Lead from the front
Nicky Nicky Nicky
Oh no
Everyone's gone
With me
And Max
Max
It's not that bad
Let me do this now
Thank you boys
Just don't get your nail
Don't get your nail
Don't be me
Brandon we love you
And your hard dick man
Thank you
Oh man
It's the wrong
Wait Titus
Titus is last
Yeah
He could
Titus can eat these He could Titus, don't eat these.
He could pussy out and you'd have to do it.
Ah!
Ah!
Yeah, there you go, Max.
I wish I had done that.
Yeah, you should go multiple fingers.
If you pussy out, Brandon has to do it.
Multiple fingers is the way to go.
Not one finger fingernail.
Just step up and do it for me.
Oh, my God.
I would.
The freshies hurt.
Yeah, I'm going to be hurt for a while from this one.
I did it for my boy, Brandon.
I love you, man.
Will you, on the day that I got you the banner.
Well, I'm going to get you a gift as well.
Will you take my spot and do it?
You were taking for me?
Yeah.
But they've already gone.
I'm offering you an opportunity.
But it would waste what they've done for me.
I'm offering you an opportunity to take my spot.
If I just do it, it'll waste what they've all done for me.
Oh, God.
No.
You fucking love this shit.
Yeah.
What are you about to put your fucking nose on it?
Oh.
Oh, you're going to watch your nail.
Finger nail.
Watch your nail.
Sicko.
You got to get further in.
Oh, he's a sicko.
Oh.
Fuck. God, why did we ever do this?
We did it for Brandon.
Don't say we.
We did it for Brandon.
We did it for Brandon.
We did it for Brandon.
You should get bracelets.
You could still do it, Brandon.
Should we get Brandon strong bracelets?
I would love that.
You could technically still do it and be part of the group.
Sudden noise, sudden things.
You could still do the mousy.
I could.
Because you love your boys.
I do love my boys.
As much as we love you.
God damn, I love my boys.
But fuck, y'all have already sacrificed, and I'd hate to spit in the face of that.
You don't want to do it?
Spitting in the face of sacrifice.
Look at my little finger.
It's all red.
My little finger.
That sucks.
It is very red.
That sucks bad.
Yeah.
Look at it.
I appreciate it boys
That means a lot
Who's on the
Challenge
Brandon I love you man
Thank you Moog
I fucking love you
Wait did you do it
No
Yeah I did it
He could do it
But he doesn't want to
I mean
If you want to be like
A personality in wrestling
And you won't even do that
Just set it in case
He wants to do it Titus
Well they've They've taken wrestling away from me.
What if I told you you could get it back in an instant?
I'd put my nutsack in there.
Che, you want to come do it for Brandon?
I don't think you know what you're saying, Matt.
Che's going to come do it for Brandon.
Hi, Brandon.
Look at the fucking guys.
Do it for Brandon.
Set one just for Brandon in case he wants to do it and changes his mind
and it's like hey my boys we're all gonna do it my boys died for me no don't don't just
just leave it to my choice yeah that's set just put it right steven wait steven's going
come on steve. Do two fingers.
Don't do your nail.
Try not to get knuckle either.
Yeah.
Ah!
Now, TJ, can you just zoom in what we have set up here?
Can you zoom in on Brandon's? You don't have to do it, man.
You don't have to do it, Brandon.
You don't have to.
Zoom in.
There it is.
There it is. It's zoomed in. You don't have to do it, man. You don't have to do it, Brandon. You don't have to. Zoom in. There it is. There it is.
It's zoomed in.
You don't have to do it, Brandon.
I know that.
I don't want you to.
We did it for you.
Because you made us do this.
And this is the end of it, so it's like you never have another chance to do it, so it's fine.
Doesn't Max have to do the challenge?
Well, no, but this is.
And if it hits the wrong spot, you might be.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
He's dancing with the devil.
Oh, my God. Oh, is he going's dancing with the devil. Oh my God.
Oh, is he going to do
the mousy with the cheese?
A little cheese cheese.
He's square dancing.
No way.
He loves us.
Wait, make sure
the camera's right.
Don't get the...
Hold on.
Quit it.
Hold on.
Ooh, little mousy.
Little brave mousy.
Little mousy.
Oh, mousy mouse.
You want these cheese?
Little, little mousy.
You want the cheese little Mousy You want some cheese
Brendan
One of us
A brother
Yes
And there it is
The finale of Mousetrap
That's how it's ended
That was a beautiful finale
Fuck
Happy I snuck in
Right before it ended
Yeah
Really good moment
It hurts so bad Yeah Oh Little mousy before it ended. Yeah. Really good moment.
That hurts so bad.
Little Mousy.
Good job, Brandon.
I'm proud of you.
That was the boys coming together.
Yeah.
Why?
It's over.
It's good.
It's done.
It's done.
We faced our fears.
Really wish I hadn't put my fingernail in there. Oh, yeah. Wait see that thing it's very red i might lose my fingernail which would actually be badass
i just had no fingernail yeah it'd be kind of sick so sick it's like what happened well
there's a wheel uh all right max spider would you like to go first max you want spider to go first
i'll go first I'll go first
I'll go first
Explain it to me though
So the gauntlet this week is all sponsored
By Omaha Steaks thank you so much to Omaha
Steaks for coming in we're going to do
At least somewhat on the gauntlet all week
Long thanks to Omaha Steaks
The
So Max and Spider are going head to head
Whoever gets a better score will get a Omaha Steaks, the who. So Max and Spider are going head to head. Whoever gets a better score will get a Omaha Steaks, right?
TJ, is Donnie cooking it?
It's done.
It's done.
It's done.
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spider and max will get a cooked omaha steak right now nice Nice. So, ready? Yeah.
All right, so you know the deal.
And you know you've got to do Sporkle when you get in here.
Okay, Max.
Wait, did you tell him about the soccer balls after three shots?
All right, okay.
Tell me when you're ready, Max, and I'll say three, two, one, go.
Okay. Okay.
Three, two, one, go. Oh, no. It's oh no it's over over oh no oh my god is he about to no bag
oh no the birds will be the first max oh my god oh oh oh no oh shit oh no it's a joke that's Oh, my God. Oh. Oh.
Oh, no. Oh, shit.
Oh, no.
It's a joke that's become real.
Hey, here we go.
Jesus.
Watch out, Chuck and Brandon.
Oh, my God.
A little high.
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Get him more balls. You think it's going to be easier once you can get closer, but it's not almost.
Oh, Mal is explaining like he hates him.
Get it in, Max.
Oh, no.
Wow.
You got cocky with that.
Doing tricks on it.
He's winded.
He's winded.
Oh, my God. this is the best Now I'm six weeks
This is bread and butter
Oh that was pretty
Not a home run
He's tired
Why is he using that hand
He's a lefty
Oh the front hand
Football That toe has got to be screaming right now He's a lefty. Oh, the front hand. Football!
Football!
That toe has got to be screaming right now.
Oh.
Malsex really does make the yak challenge.
It's my favorite.
He's the highlight.
Every time.
Can we have graphics make him a Like the FIFA card
And ultimate team card
This boy does not want to run
Shit
Are we in real ones territory?
That's how bad we were
It depends on how the shots go
He's not happy right now
Sporkle might be tough
Oh man Brandon just No that's not good I'm happy right now. Sporkle might be tough.
Oh, man.
Brandon just.
No, that's not good.
You got this, Max.
There it is.
Three.
This feels like he's going to hit it.
Oh.
Whoops. Oh. Whoops.
Nope.
Gassed.
He screamed up gassed.
Oh, no.
Everyone watching upstairs. Wait, has Smokes went yet? Uh, no. Everyone watching upstairs.
Wait, has Smokes went yet?
No.
No, we'll have him go this week for sure because we have to do it every day.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
You got it, Max.
Come on, Max.
Has Jerry gone?
Yeah, right? I don't think so. Maybe we'll have Smokes versus Jerry. Jerry went on, Max. Has Jerry gone? Yeah, right?
I don't think so.
Maybe we'll have smokes versus Jerry.
Did he?
I don't think so.
You'll have to go smokes versus Jerry. Jerry went on November 29th.
Oh, he did.
All of his balls are going so far away.
There we go.
Hey!
There it is, Max.
Don't let Max get hot.
He's now in real life.
What's the chances he misses these five not high he's he's hot now
How you feeling spider you think this is a beatable score Titus yeah, yeah
Spider sit in that seat so max can sit and do sparkle. Yeah, I know it's wider. You're getting your eating
This there is you're eating a steak all right come on
All right, we'll help you a little.
All right.
Six most populated cities in Canada.
Ottawa.
That's not a city, huh?
Vancouver. Vancouver.
Toronto.
Vancouver is surprising.
Four NBA teams with Z in their name.
Wizards.
Yeah. Jazz.
Yeah.
The Lasers? You said the
Canadian city. Lasers.
Oh, I meant... Eight Reindeer.
I was making a leak. Rudolph.
Oh, yeah.
Rip these. Blitzen.
Normal noses. Comet.
Nixon.
Ten letters that are also words.
O.
I.
Just type the letter.
No, I guess not.
Oh, no, just type I.
Ten letters that are also.
A.
Yeah.
What?
Yeah.
There's ten of them.
Oh, just do O by itself.
Oh, I thought. No. What the? This thing is fucked. Nine women. Oh, nine women. What? Yeah There's 10 of them Oh just do O by itself Oh I No I
What the
This thing is fucked
Nine women
Oh nine women
Um
Cameron Diaz
Two more
Minka Kelly
Jessica Alba
Minka
Oh
Oh
Alba
I'm getting fucked by the booth
Yeah that's part of the game
One more
There we go
You're good
521
No no no
Oh that's for the winner
So we gotta wait
I mean Malicek's such a fucking cock
That's a delicious Omaha steak
Goodness
Incredible
Omaha steaks Wow I want it He is a cop. Oh, that's a delicious Omaha steak. Goodness. That looks amazing. Incredible.
Omaha steaks.
Fuck, I want it.
Wow.
I want it.
I want it too.
Yeah.
What are the letters that are also words?
A, B, C, J.
Yeah, P. What does that mean?
So B, B-E-E, right?
Yeah.
C, S-E-A.
But it's O, not a word.
O is a word.
Okay.
Okay, keep scrolling.
Keep scrolling.
Oh.
Real ones.
You're in the real ones territory.
Yeah, real one.
521.
Yeah.
Oh, he broke up the shirt.
Damn it.
He fucked up the merch.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It's Cam Newton, Max, and the shirt. Damn it. He fucked up the merch. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
It's Cam Newton, Max, and KB and Delaney.
All right.
All right, Max.
Soccer was really tough.
Yeah.
I mean.
Well, you got to stay and see Spider go.
Look at his steak.
That looks phenomenal.
Unbelievable.
Omaha steak. Shout out.
50% off site-wide plus
extra $30 off promo code YAK.
Alright, Spider.
Spider's getting the cornhole first toss.
You think? Yeah. I think Spider also is going to do
well against Malasek.
Who is that resting on? Malasek's probably going to be a bitch
and just let him score. Donnie, what's
this on?
Palenta. Oh, what's this on? Palenta.
Palenta.
Oh, Brandon's for sure eating steak.
Oh, he's got it.
Oh, my God.
Puts one finger in a mousetrap and thinks he can be eating steak.
That was the most mouthful answer.
Palenta.
Palenta.
I'm getting nervous.
All right, Spider. Tell us when, TJ. I'm ready nervous Alright Spider
Tell us when TJ
I'm ready
Alright
3
2
1
Go
Oh he's taking his time
Oh no
Oh Jesus
Oh no
Spider
Jesus Christ Spider
You just gotta get this
Oh no
Yup
Yes
He's got that cotton candy fit on Oh You just got to get this. Oh, no. Yes.
He's got that cotton candy fit on.
Oh!
I told you he was going to do that.
I told you my boy was going to do that.
I don't know about that move.
I'm actually kind of pissed about that move.
This might be a problem for Spider. Yep.
Oh!
He looks so swaggy today.
Ooh, I like this music.
He's just, he's erased all the goodwill that he did with Malasek. Yep.
I mean, was that not right at Malasek's fucking face?
Malasek threw that.
He just got out of the way.
Threw it.
Malasek was a team. There it is.
Football.
Football.
Everybody forgets football.
Oh.
Gotta use the Kyle technique of landing it right on top of the ball.
It's worked every time.
Yeah.
Kyle, like, throws a grenade.
He got it. There's worked every time. Yeah. Kyle, like, throws a grenade. He got it.
There you go, Spider.
Spider's got a nice time going.
Oh, no.
Yeah, this might be a problem.
Uh-oh.
Oh, yikes.
He's going fast, though.
Yeah, he is.
Oh.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
Oh, geez.
Next week, Julian Edelman's coming to the office.
He will, I think, dominate this.
Does he have a hotel or does he need to crash at mine?
Your place.
That's fine.
Did you float the idea to starve at all?
Yeah, he had a flight at 3 o'clock and he had a lunch.
But he might have been scared.
He might have been scared of the Yak Challenge.
It's daunting.
All right, Spider's in trouble.
I'd say so. Oh, my God.
He's in trouble.
He had an unbelievable run going up.
There we go.
No, he's still fine time-wise.
Yeah, he's not even close to being real.
Think about the steak.
We're due for someone to hit the cornhole board when they turn around.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It hasn't happened in a while.
Like a broken ankle on that thing.
Oh, boy.
You're all right, Spidey.
You're all right, Spidey.
Oh. Uh-oh oh
this is this is yep yeah you're good you're pretty sparkle sparkle sparkle sparkle all right
here we go nine teams in mlb nba NHL, NFL that don't end with S.
That one's a good one to start.
Fuck.
Nope.
Too long, didn't read.
President of the United States.
Oh, nice.
Be right back.
What is it?
Fat upper pussy area.
What is going on?
Acronyms.
What?
Hanukkah, Passover, Bar Mitzvah.
Wait, you had another.
He had fat upper pussy as well.
Area.
Four main stars.
Chumlee, Rick Harris, Rick Harrison.
You had Hanukkah as well.
Yeah.
That's a spell.
Yeah, that's going to be tough.
All right.
We'll go on to the next.
No.
Red Sox.
White Sox.
Oh, nice.
One more.
One more.
One more. Don more. One more.
Don't end with S.
Come on.
Come on.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Josh Giddy.
Thunder.
Oklahoma City Thunder. There we go.
OKC Thunder.
Josh Giddy.
Hey.
429.
Thank you, boy.
Here it is right here Look at this
You got the fork and everything
Let's go
Brandon 8
Max thoughts
Malasek is absolutely dead to me
He's an absolute joke
That he just got out of the way
Of Spider's ball there
This looks great
Jake you want a piece?
Go score on Malasek right now
I just want to punch him
Go punch him right now
He's a real motherfucker
That's incredible
Yeah he's dead
Alright thank you for having me
Yes Max
Good day for you Max
Great day
Sucked I hate this show
Yeah Max came
Got embarrassed by Malasek
Lost out on a stake
Put his finger in a trap.
Yeah.
You see he's screaming at him now.
Kick one in his face.
Thank you very much, guys.
Thank you, Omaha Steaks.
This is delicious.
Good job, Spider.
Good job, Spider.
Spider looks like Mac Miller's ghost today.
Yeah.
Spider, can I try?
Pass it around.
One thing about Spider is he doesn't eat.
No.
Yeah.
He's the only person
who loses weight
just by accident.
Like if he doesn't
remember to eat
he's like yeah
I just lost 20 pounds.
Yeah.
It's like what?
He lives off like
like vape
like weed vape
and yeah.
Yeah.
I got my nail too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh my finger is hot
right now.
Yeah. I'm just gonna have two bruises
Where the bar hit
That's a sign of brotherhood
Badass
Yeah
We all went
Scars with each other
And now it's done Brandon
Face your
Face all your
Fears
Truly sucked
Yeah
It does
Alright we got anything else boys?
Tomorrow maybe Ronan Sass?
Yeah
I love you guys
I can't wait to see Sass
Yeah
Alisak's gonna put him in a blunder
Oh my god
Sass on this
It's gonna be incredible
It's gonna be tough
He's gonna be so mad
So so mad
Okay well thank you everyone
And then
Yeah so the plan tonight is we will make clips
yeah so we'll tweet him from the yak account you want to watch with me kb all right ready
see if there's a way we can let me talk to new york i'll see if maybe there's a way we can
put our stream or put him in the corner or something. Yeah. Yeah.
I'll figure it out.
I'll tweet out whatever the plan is.
But no matter what, we'll have someone documenting Mook in his quest for $35,000.
$35,000.
I mean, that's... I don't even...
Yeah.
I'm pumped.
Congratulations, Mook.
I'm happy for you, man.
I'm sure this is going to end well.
Yeah.
This is exciting.
If this hits, and then the producer bonus hits, and then the $1,200 from this, it's a big come up.
You'll probably never see me again.
Yeah.
And look.
You're going to Bender and Mexico.
You're excited right now, right?
You're super excited, and you're going to be super excited for the next, what, six hours?
Yes.
That's what I pay for.
Gambling's like paying money to watch a movie and there's a chance you find two grand under your seat at the end of it. I enjoyed that and look at that bonus.
I'm going to be doing a lot of squirming.
Are you nervous yet? I'm more excited right now.
I can feel it in my shoulders at the moment.
It'll work its way down. I'm more excited right now. I can feel it in my shoulders at the moment. Ever had that? No, no.
It'll work its way down.
Yeah.
What if none of them score?
If not one of them scores, I'll give you two grand cash.
The reverse.
No.
That would be...
Oh, if you go 0 for 5?
If it's 0 for 5, that would be all-time how did this happen.
Kind of impressive.
Yeah.
Actually, I could do probably a bet.
Pedge with none of them scoring?
None of them scoring.
Neither of these things are going to happen.
But man.
Hold on.
Let me see.
Mook, I'm rooting for you, bro.
Thank you, brother.
I'm rooting for you hard.
Let's see Jalen
No
Well this actually will be juicy
Tyreek
Now
But then you'll have to
Be stuck in a spot
Where you're like
Am I rooting for them to score
Or not to score
I'm gonna keep
I'm gonna keep this simple
I'm rooting for them to score
Yeah
But at what point do you switch
Second half
Second half. Second half, yeah.
Oh, man.
Okay, yeah.
I'm putting in all five of them to not score.
Oh, God.
What does that pay?
It's 500 to win five five grand so i'll split
it with you i'll give you 20 wait why can't i put it in maybe i can't you can't you can all right
so if none of them score you get 2500 dang that's the torture thank you that's the torture
because he's got to basically be like rooting hard for them to score,
and then at some point in the game you have to flip.
It's all five of them.
If it goes ten minutes into the game with none scoring,
is that when you flip?
No, I think you have to go halftime.
I'm trying to think of a worst-case scenario.
Two scores immediately.
Yeah.
And then no one else scores. And then no one else.
And then no one else.
Worst case scenario is they all score,
but one guy was a half yard offside and they call one of them back.
Yeah.
Or worst case scenario is none of them score
and then one of them scores with like two minutes.
Oh, that would be so funny.
To win the game in overtime.
Yeah.
That's worst case scenario.
Oh, no.
Tyreek Hill just streaking no one near him to win in overtime. Yeah. Yeah. That's worst case. Oh, Tyreek Hill.
Just streaking.
No one near him.
Oh,
when in overtime,
you got this move.
You got the smoke.
You got this.
All right.
We'll see you tomorrow.
All right.
That's good.
It's going to be so fun.
Yeah. We'll see you next time. See you tomorrow.
Bye.