The Yak - Nicky Smokes Comes Into the Studio STEAMING | The Yak 12-1-23

Episode Date: December 1, 2023

You got Smoked!You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Of all the things in life, one of the best has to be getting high whenever you want, wherever you want, without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk. What's the best way to do that? With 3Chi, of course. 3Chi has the highest quality cannabis products from their delicious Delta 9 edibles and their industry-leading Delta 8 products to their new line of Delta 9-O vapes and everything in between.
Starting point is 00:00:33 When you buy 3Chi, you know you're getting the highest quality in purity, taste, and that craveably potent buzz every single time. All products are formulated by a biochemist and made in the USA with USA grown hemp. Yak listeners get an exclusive 15% discount on all of 3Chi's premium THC products. Go to 3chi.com. Use promo code YAK15 to take 15% off your order. Again, that's 3chi.com. 3-C-H-I.com.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Use promo code YAK15 to get 15% off your order. Must be 21 or older to purchase. Please use responsibly. It's the YAK. It's the YAK. Get your draw out, YAK. Yo, TJ, hold that up. It's the YAK. It's the YAK. Yo DJ, hold that up.
Starting point is 00:01:29 Hello. What's up everyone? It's the Yak. Sponsored by Roback. R-H-O-B-A-C-K dot com. 20% off your first purchase. With code Yak. Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts, and?
Starting point is 00:01:49 Q-Zips. Polos. Oh, what? You said joggers, didn't you? You're kind of stepping on my toes. Back off. There's fleeces now, too. Slow your roll, bro.
Starting point is 00:01:59 Yeah. And joggers. Damn, you're standing on business. That's what we thought. Ten toes down. Ten toes. He scolds on business. That's what we thought. Ten toes down. Ten toes. The one that scolds me more kind of gets me going. You want me?
Starting point is 00:02:09 I want you to be a little bit mean. You've been a bad boy? A little bit more mean. Yeah, you've been a bad boy. You've been naughty. A little bit. Wait, have you for real been bad? What? Have you been bad?
Starting point is 00:02:20 I've been kind of bad. You've been naughty? Yeah. What have you been doing? I've just been prioritizing my own emotions Oh Neglecting others That's fucked up
Starting point is 00:02:30 That's just normal Yeah, that's human I've learned that I just gotta keep doing that And I'm happier You're a little more selfish Yeah How's Piper Jones doing, by the way?
Starting point is 00:02:40 Great, and I actually had this conversation with the missus About bringing her in And I decided not to Wait Oh, to to the office i think she would underperform and then that would send me into a would you stop liking her yeah i think she would suck in front of you guys let's try i think we need to try these yeah yeah we close these and we just it would have to be an edited video i don't want to do it live and have her embarrass me because I've been talking her up for like 10 months. You think she's going to bomb? I think she would bomb, yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:09 No. No shot, yeah. Does she have a Christmas blouse on? She has a Christmas sweater, yeah. Oh, look at this. Piper Jones. Piper Jones. Oh, Piper Jones is the Jets.
Starting point is 00:03:20 Yeah. I don't get where your TV is. All right. What? Does it cover up some of the door? Between the door and the hall. No, it's between the- Do you bump into it?
Starting point is 00:03:29 The door and the balcony door. The bedroom door and the balcony door. The only place it could have went, and it kind of works perfectly. It looks like a little tilted as well. Criticism. No, I'm not criticizing. Wait, is the countdown on for Piper Jones' brother? Yeah, January.
Starting point is 00:03:45 Wow. Yeah. January. Wow. Yeah. January Jones? Hello. Oh. I don't know who that is. Oh. Do we have a name?
Starting point is 00:03:52 Like a TV actress? She was in, she's out of your league, my league. Oh, it's not a porn star? No. Now, see, look, like, if Piper Jones just does this, that's it. January Jones. She's crushing right now. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:04 Yeah, that's pretty good. That's pretty fucking good. No, for a cat, that's it. She's crushing right now. Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty good. That's pretty fucking good. No, for a cat, that's like 10 out of 10 material. She's like a puppy. Oh, I hate when people do that. She's not. I hate when people do that. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:04:15 She's old. She's not like that. When they're like, my cat is just like a dog. No, it's not. I've never seen a cat actually use that big thing that people buy. It's like a humble puppy. Yeah. No. Yeah. Like, oh, yeah, I play fetch with my cat. Mod that big thing that people buy. It's like a humble puppy. No.
Starting point is 00:04:25 Yeah. Like, oh, yeah, I play fetch with my cat. Modest puppy, yeah. You play fetch? A non-annoying puppy. You said Piper Jones is annoying. She is, yeah. Well, she's a teenager, right?
Starting point is 00:04:37 Isn't she a teenager right now? She's 13, yeah. Yeah. So that's when she's going to start hating you. A little old. Rebelling. Yeah. She'll start not listening to you.
Starting point is 00:04:47 Someone else bring in their cat. I would do that. Playdate? I don't have a cat, but I'll get a cat. They would hate each other. That'd be funny. It's hard to put cats together. I don't have a cat.
Starting point is 00:04:58 That would be awesome. Yeah, you do. Not in Illinois, I don't. You said your outdoor cat's still... My cat went home with my mom to Mississippi. Oh. Tommy's just badly allergic. Can it beat your outdoor cat's still. My cat went home with my mom to Mississippi. Oh. Tommy's just badly allergic. Can it be your cat?
Starting point is 00:05:09 Me too. It doesn't really. Not your cat anymore. Does anyone. I think that's your mom's cat now. I guess it is. It lives at my mom's house. It went south for the winter.
Starting point is 00:05:17 Does anyone here have a non-dog cat pet? What? A cat? A non-dog slash cat. Oh. No. Oh, I had goldfish, but, well, I don't have them now. They didn't come out here.
Starting point is 00:05:31 So, yeah, you don't. I flushed them before we came out here. A lot. Huh? You flushed them alive? Nah. Sounds like you did. They didn't make the trip.
Starting point is 00:05:39 How'd you kill them? They didn't make the trip, Moog. What does that mean? They didn't make the trip. They didn't. I don't know. Be very clear. I don't know what y'all want to know. They didn't make the trip. They didn't make the trip, Moog. What does that mean? They didn't make the trip. They didn't. I don't know. Be very clear. I don't know what y'all want to know. They didn't make the trip.
Starting point is 00:05:47 They didn't make the trip. Something happened. It's like, you know, in Goodfellas when they're like, Tommy didn't make it. He took out the trash. Yeah, Tommy didn't make it. What do you mean? Yeah, there was a problem. He didn't make it.
Starting point is 00:05:56 Yeah. He had an issue. You know what we mean. Yeah. Nothing we could do. That's just business. I don't really know what you mean, but I know what you mean. It was going to take four days to get the truck out here.
Starting point is 00:06:06 They weren't going to make it. It's a business decision, okay? It's for the better. It was quick. We don't talk about it. Yeah. Got it. I think I'd like hermit crabs.
Starting point is 00:06:16 You're always talking about hermit crabs. I am. I went to go get some hermit crabs in fifth grade. I came back with a chinchilla. Why didn't you get a hermit crab? My mom let me get a chinchilla instead. Henry. Henri.
Starting point is 00:06:30 Henri. Have y'all all had hermit crabs? I had some hermit crabs. No. I had two, Regis and Kathy Lee. One of mine got out one time. And I was in like third grade, dude. I was in third grade.
Starting point is 00:06:43 I had Regis and Kathy Lee. You loved Regis Young, though. Yeah, I did. You were a Regis guy? I was in like third grade, dude. I was in third grade. I had Regis and Kathy. He loved Regis Young, though. Yeah, I did. You were a Regis guy? I was a huge... Millionaire. I was a huge, huge just talk show guy. As a kid, I would always write to Rosie O'Donnell.
Starting point is 00:06:56 No. Yeah, I was trying to design her desk. I would draw new desks for her and try to get her to... Oh, my God. Can we find those? My mom still has all my desk designs for Rosie. We need them. And I was obsessed with all daily talk shows as a kid.
Starting point is 00:07:09 And she was a big girl. Rosie? What kind of desks were you designing? Pretty cool ones with gadgets and gizmos. And, you know, spikes. You're talking about the actual structural integrity of the desk? I just saw...
Starting point is 00:07:24 She's not going to sit on the desk. She's going to sit behind it. Okay. But there is gizmos and levers and shit for her to pull. Gizmos.
Starting point is 00:07:33 Yeah, it's a combination of a gadget and gizmo. Got a trinket that hits on I want to see these desks. I'll get my mom to send me the desks.
Starting point is 00:07:44 What's the most common amount of kids to have? Two. Two. Over one, you think? Yeah. Yeah. I think two is more.
Starting point is 00:07:51 Well, I think two is probably. Are you talking about just like a nuclear family? Are you talking about just like an average dude? Because, yeah, maybe. In America. Two. What is the. I bet you the average is like 2.2.
Starting point is 00:08:05 2.38, right? I think there's more two kid parents than one kid parents. I do. Yes. What is the... I bet you the average is like 2.2. 2.38, right? I think there's more two-kid parents than one-kid parents. I do. Yes, I do. But I'm thinking there are probably a lot of guys that had an accidental baby and then just... Well, now wait. Got that fixed. I'm not talking about average.
Starting point is 00:08:19 Wow, no. There's a lot of single people that only have one. That's what I mean. But if you're talking about a nuclear family situation... Wait, America had an average of 1 people that only have one. That's what I mean. But if you're talking about like a nuclear family situation. Wait. We have an average of 1.9. Per family. We don't fuck anymore.
Starting point is 00:08:31 There's like a lot of young families. Oh, we have stopped fucking. We stopped fucking. So let's tally stumps. I don't get why we stopped fucking. That's one stump for me. Oh, you stump. Okay. So yeah, you guys can try to stump the group too.
Starting point is 00:08:40 Okay. Why did we stop fucking? So you got one stump. Well, people stopped having kids as early yeah like people are having kids later in life but isn't there like a thing that like gen z's not fucking as much too no it's just antidepressants just staring at screens too much also the baby boomers that's i mean fucking is good guys you should do it you should got you guys should all try it i've heard i cannot wait i cannot to fuck. Why were the boomers so horny?
Starting point is 00:09:06 No, it wasn't the boomers. They wanted kids to survive. No, no, it wasn't the post-war people. It was preceding the boomers. They got back from the war. The boomers are the biggest generation. They're the greatest generation. They're like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:18 They came from horny people. Yeah, they're like, what, 50s? 45 to 55, right? Booms? 45 to 55, right? Boomers? 45 to 55? Or 45 to 60? 60-something. So it's the World War I guys.
Starting point is 00:09:32 No, it's the World War II. They come back and they just start to fuck it up. Everyone came back from war and was like, I need a fucking plant. I would. And they fucked up. The boomers have fucked up everything because they basically took everything and now the world, like, the boomers all bought houses. Like they bought a house for, you know, 30 grand.
Starting point is 00:09:51 And now it's worth like 1.5 million. Yeah. What's the greatest? What was the greatest generation? Yeah. 46. That was the World War II people that fought in World War II. The greatest generation fought in World War.
Starting point is 00:10:02 That's Tom Brokaw calling the World War II people the greatest generation. Yeah. That's the greatest generation. I don't think that's the actual thing. Why is greatest generation World War World War... That's Tom Brokaw calling the World War II people the greatest generation. Yeah, that's the greatest generation. I don't think that's the actual thing. Why is greatest generation World War I in my mind? No, it's two. What was World War I then? World War I was just old people.
Starting point is 00:10:15 It says the greatest generation right here is 1901 to 1907. Yeah, that's people who fought in World War II. They were born 1901 to 1907. It could have been like... Yeah, I don't know. Never mind. I'll shut up. This is boring. No, you're good. This is cool. It was It could have been like, yeah, I don't know. Never mind. I'll shut up. This is boring.
Starting point is 00:10:25 No, you're good. This is cool. It was okay. But boomers, yeah, have fucked up everything because they just basically took all the resources and they got cheap college and then they tell all their kids like, hey, why don't you make it? Yeah. Why don't you just buy a house and not have debt and do what we did?
Starting point is 00:10:44 Yeah. Society peaked in the 90s yeah buy a house for 10 grand and have it appreciate by like 100 yeah but they're they're also like you have it so much easier right but they're wrong but they're wrong yeah they fucked up very wrong yeah yeah yeah i'll never buy a house yeah pretty much no i know you won't yeah you i'll be renting forever right yeah you'll buy a house i don't know i think you're in your forever home right now i don't want to leave either that would be depressing but i think it actually would like get to a point where it's kind of cool i just rent a new yeah like if you're 50 and you're like
Starting point is 00:11:20 been here for 40 years or 30 years yeah get like rent control so yeah and then you're kind of, and then you're kind of the cool guy who's, like, everyone knows in the neighborhood. I've had this thought where I'm like, I don't really want to be rich, but I want to be wealthy enough to have one of those, like, big cloud couches that take up your entire room. You could do that right now. Nah. Yeah. Just use the bonus. Yeah. Use the bonus.
Starting point is 00:11:44 Everyone's like, I paid off my debt. I paid my rent. I got a cloud couch. Yeah, this is going to be the worst thing that's ever happened to me. I got a cloud couch for a 300-square-foot apartment. Yeah. I can get rid of my bed. That would be awesome.
Starting point is 00:11:57 We've never talked about Nick's couch. Nice couch. Oh, it's a great couch. You have one of the best couches I've ever seen. I have the best couch in the world. What makes it a good couch? It's an incredible couch. Because it's comfortable? Because it has have one of the best couches I've ever seen. I have the best couch in the world. What makes it a good couch? It's an incredible couch. Yeah, like, because it's comfortable,
Starting point is 00:12:08 because it has, like, cup holders and chargers. It's built in, phone chargers and shit. Comfort size. It's one of the biggest couches I've ever seen. Five stream gray? Yeah. Yeah, we have the same. Best couch. Yep.
Starting point is 00:12:15 Mine is considerably smaller, but. I actually just got a new couch today that got delivered. I'm very nervous about it. That's very exciting. Yeah, but it's also nerve wracking. It is. What if it stinks? Then it just becomes an accessory and not. It's not a sitting couch? Yep. Worst couch you've ever had. I grew up nervous about it. That's very exciting. Yeah, but it's also nerve-wracking. It is. What if it stinks? Then it just becomes an accessory.
Starting point is 00:12:26 It's not a sitting couch? Yep. Worst couch you should have. I grew up without a sitting. I grew up, we had a couch that wasn't for sitting. Yeah. And it sucked. What did you buy that couch for?
Starting point is 00:12:34 I have no idea. No, did you buy it to have it as a showpiece? Or is this your napping couch? It's the family room couch. Okay, so it's a napping couch. Yeah, I would imagine it looks like the basement couch is probably going to be a bad looking couch, but more comfort and you can fuck it up. I got my napping couch downstairs.
Starting point is 00:12:52 This is probably the couch that's semi-comfortable, but the kids aren't allowed to eat on it. Right, but they're going to jump on it. Oh, yeah. So it has to remain. It's going to have to be a little bit firm. Yeah. Yeah. Have you situated all the rooms in your house?
Starting point is 00:13:04 Yeah. Have you designated this are you still finding rooms yeah still finding half no i found them all you found all the rooms yep i did is there any rooms in your house that you've only been to once the gym okay there okay sorry to even ask i see see the gym is across the hall From where I have my little office set up And I just give a little of that When I walk by, I'm like
Starting point is 00:13:32 What's up, Jimmy? Oh, you're still here? I thought this would have been repurposed a long time ago Waiting to pave it over Pay your respects I'm going to get back in the gym after football season i got i got plans i got ideas what's your method of putting your feet up on your couch at home do you guys got like a coffee table you put your feet on you have a
Starting point is 00:13:55 building recliner i'm a giant coffee chase that you i have the extended piece yeah the the sectional yeah i have the sectional with the chase lounge i the sectional, but I also have an old war chest. Oh, hell yes. It was a portable darkroom for World War II. What? What does that mean? Let's unpack that. It's a room?
Starting point is 00:14:16 No, it's a portable darkroom. It was a chest used for developing film. Like Yehi? Yeah. Carbon is so big, he has a room. I use a room as my end table. No, yeah, just a war chest. It was owned by a priest before me.
Starting point is 00:14:31 I bought it from him. I'm having a bunch of furniture delivered this weekend. Are you? It's quite like that. Yeah, it's authentic. My mother-in-law's been here two weeks. It's like that. Go up.
Starting point is 00:14:40 Go up right. That one. Oh. Oh. Oh. That looks like a torture device. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. No, but you don't go in it.
Starting point is 00:14:50 Good. I guess you could. Wait, what were you going to say, Brandon? My mother-in-law's been here two weeks. That's, oh my gosh. Her. My wife just got, whoa my gosh. Whoa my gosh.
Starting point is 00:14:59 That's how you know it's bad. Two weeks. My wife and her. Yeah, remember when I had to leave early that day to get up? Yeah. No, it's bad. My wife and her. Yeah, remember when I had to leave early that day to get up? My wife and her mother contracted my mother-in-law's best friend, who is flying up today. There's only a few things you can contract. What is Fasoli doing?
Starting point is 00:15:18 And she is now the interior decorator of my home. And she bought a bunch of stuff in Mississippi and is being driven up today to. You got Mississippi furniture? I got Mississippi furniture. What is that, wicker? No, it's just whatever they got. I really didn't ask. I just spent the money.
Starting point is 00:15:37 So, she, you basically had. This weekend. Your mother-in-law was like, I have a friend for this. Yeah. She's going to get a kickback. You're just giving money to people you kind of know in my house this weekend will be me my four children my wife her mother and her mother's best friend no cat friend yes yes no cat no goldfish no cat no goldfish as of now how how old's your mother wait but that's actually okay brand her mother how old's her mother yeah probably 75 so she's got a best friend still rocking with her that's pretty that's actually okay brandon her mother how it's her mother yeah probably 75 she's got a best friend still rocking with her that's pretty that's okay though brandon because
Starting point is 00:16:10 that's that's enough women that they will just like occupy each other and talk and gab and you can just be yourself you can just go in well i'm coming to stream here tomorrow yeah and i'll probably be here i'll find something to do sunday i'll might go to eat, but I'll be out of the house. Where's your mother-in-law's house? Do you have a guest room? I have a guest room. Yeah, but you don't have to get out of your house. You stay in your basement.
Starting point is 00:16:32 They don't go down there. That's man zone. That's the problem. Guest room's in the basement. Oh, that's an issue. Guest room's in the basement. Brutal. Brandon, we can hang out Sunday.
Starting point is 00:16:43 Yeah, we could. Yeah. What do you want to do? Catch a football game at a bar. Eat some wings. Brandon we can hang out Sunday yeah we could yeah what do you want to do catch a catch a football game at a bar eat some wings I don't want to do that
Starting point is 00:16:51 alright damn that sounds awesome yeah that sounds like Stephen Chase oh you're gonna do it yeah I'll do it with you
Starting point is 00:16:57 no he's not oh fuck you that sounds like a day of the life of an orphan yeah an adult orphan. Just go to the bar.
Starting point is 00:17:07 Thanksgiving was last week, though, so I don't know if you guys can do that on Sunday. Yeah, I can't. Those are Thanksgiving things. Yeah, right. Why is Fasoli rollerblading? Why is Fasoli rollerblading around? Fasoli's doing a show. What is he doing?
Starting point is 00:17:18 He knows exactly what he's doing. He craves screen time. Oh. It is the Fasoli show today. It is. Did he just? Oh. Oh, I thought Meganoli show today. It is. Did he just? Oh. Oh, Megan was like, no, it's two.
Starting point is 00:17:28 Yeah, that was a quick. Megan was like, no, thank you. That was tough. Well, did you hear what he brought up yesterday? What? No. Yeah. Everyone was talking.
Starting point is 00:17:39 They were talking sex upstairs. And Fasoli revealed a fact. Who started this? Without me? I don't even know if we could talk. I don't think we can without his consent. Fasoli revealed a fact. Who started this? Without me? I don't even know if we could talk. I don't think we can without his consent. Fasoli, roll over here. That was brutal that he just tried a cool guy to go sit next to her and she immediately
Starting point is 00:17:52 stood up. She's repulsed by him right now for good reason. Megan wanted nothing to do with you. Why is that? Have a seat. You don't have to stare at me. Okay. What were y'all talking about upstairs yesterday? What?
Starting point is 00:18:09 What's up Fasoli? I didn't go upstairs yesterday You didn't go upstairs yesterday? That's crazy You almost certainly went upstairs at some point Where? Don't you film for Viva TV? You didn't go upstairs
Starting point is 00:18:19 Talk in the mic What's going on right now? Is today your first day? Yeah what are you doing? No Chuck No no but like Why are you doing? No, Chuck. No, no, but like you don't even know what to talk in the mic. Because Chuck said that these skates were broken and he was throwing them. That's the worst accrued.
Starting point is 00:18:36 No. Those testers, they were broken. New Viva TV out tonight. What the fuck? New Viva TV out tonight. You'll see the bull junk Chuck was talking. So I have to prove him wrong. The bull junk?
Starting point is 00:18:47 Are you Dion now? The bull junk. Bull junk. That's what he said. I was testing to see if they were broken. So I have to prove him wrong that they're not broken. How would they be broken? Because he couldn't even.
Starting point is 00:18:59 Now, listen. Go show us that they're not broken. Did you see Chuck rollerblading the other day in the Mr. Ball? Yeah, it was bad. They were broken when he was on. Go. Wait, wait, wait when he was on. Go. Wait, wait, wait. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:19:09 Wait, wait. Sex talk. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, now it's going. Yeah. What happened? It was bully talk.
Starting point is 00:19:20 What are you talking about? He's talking like other people. Who are you right now? Bully are you are you high or am i high i think i think we're high jimmy we're in jerry simulator and it was bully talk okay they brought me into the conversation okay and what was the conversation like locker room talk locker room talk no i i heard i think i heard that you kind of just appeared and dropped no i heard i heard you i was filming everything you dropped dropped your truth and walked away. No, I stood there the whole time with everyone.
Starting point is 00:19:48 I sat down next to Jerry. Do you want to reveal your truth or no? No. Say something that wasn't your truth first. I don't ever lie to anyone. What? Brandon, hand up. Why are you perplexing me right now?
Starting point is 00:20:05 Seriously, I feel like I'm not. I feel weird. Yeah, hand up. Why are you perplexing me right now? Seriously, I feel weird. Yeah, very weird. I got a contact high from Fasoli. I'm intimidated by him. This is the weirdest he's ever acted. Is this a smokes prank? Is this smokes and Fasoli makeup? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:20:16 Oh, you guys want me to say the condom thing? No, but... Well, now you have to say the condom thing. To be quite honest, I don't know what it is. I've just never used a condom. Oh. Okay. That rocks.
Starting point is 00:20:28 Damn, dude. That rocks. Yeah, I don't know. And you're a good Catholic boy. Yeah. Oh, that's a challenge. Oh, then yeah. He's trying to reproduce.
Starting point is 00:20:38 What does that mean? Oh, never mind. What? Go ahead. Well, why? When you say you've never used a condom? Are there other things you've never done? Have you had an opportunity to use a condom? Sex.
Starting point is 00:20:50 Yes. Okay. I have a girlfriend, Tyler. You can have a girlfriend without having sex? Yeah. Trust me. My bad. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:21:00 All right. So he's just sitting here in one of the ways. He's just here. Yeah. That was scandalous. I understand why you didn't want to share that. Chuck wrong because he's talking a bunch of bull junk. Stop doing that.
Starting point is 00:21:09 Cut the bull junk. I've had enough. I've had enough. Get out of here. Scram. You can't look cool getting away with the light up. He tried so hard. That is the worst way to get out of somewhere.
Starting point is 00:21:23 Six-month ban from the Yak. Yeah. That was odd. from the Yak. Yeah. That was odd. I still don't know. Never mind. Never mind. Yeah, yeah. He's back in.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Wow. Wow. That was perfect. Oh, man. All right. He's back. Fuck yes. He won me back.
Starting point is 00:21:44 Oh. That ruled. What a load of bull junk oh he's a bull junker no let him get back up Oh, man. Oh, that's perfect. TJ, you okay? That was... Man, cut the bull, John. Cut the bull, John. Pass it to him, Wayne. That's a devil's trio right there. Oh, my God. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:16 Nightmare. White boy Rick, first day in office. White boy Rick. Nice. He's a tall lad. He is. Is he a Chuck protege? He is a tall lad. He is. Is he a Chuck protege?
Starting point is 00:22:28 He is a Chuck protege. Looks like a milk drinker. He does. Uh-huh. Boy loves milk. I think he tweeted that he's going to get his birth name to be his name while he's here. I don't think that's going to happen. What's his birth name? I have no idea.
Starting point is 00:22:42 I know it, but I don't even want to say it. Well, you can say his first name. Is it like a slur? No, I just know him as White Boy Rick. His name is Kevin. Oh. That's not going to work. He's introducing himself as Kevin?
Starting point is 00:22:51 Yes. Yeah, he's Rick. Can't do that. He's Rick. He's Rick. Can't do that. What up, White Boy? No, he's just Rick.
Starting point is 00:22:57 So what's he trying to do? I introduced myself. I was like, what's up, Rick? Yeah. Never mind. He's trying to get people to call him his real name. You're thinking better of it quickly. Yeah, I am.
Starting point is 00:23:10 I'm like, you know. I think he's an Indiana Hoops fan. Oh, really? He is. Oh, nice. So he's been known as Rick, and he's just trying to do. His Twitter name is White Boy Rick. And he's trying to do a hard reset.
Starting point is 00:23:21 To Kevin. To Kevin. I'll say right now, no yeah reset denied rick i don't know him so yeah i yeah i don't know i mean we have a guy i just want to be does he just want to be kevin to us as we talk to him or his person his public persona we have a guy who we call travi because he made one one tick tock is it travi for the boys. One TikTok. It said Travi for the boys. Yeah, that is confusing working here. Yeah, you can't be, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:50 It's hard to figure out. And I do have to think hard about what Travi's actual name is. Yeah, I'm actually blanking right now. Sean. Sean. He wanted to be called Yeti. What? On this show, he said call me Yeti.
Starting point is 00:24:02 Was his Twitter handle Barstool Yeti for a little while? I think it was. His boys at Alabama called him Yeti. He's a big boy. He walked in here. He was Sean, and then one day later, he was Travis. He's Travi. Travi's better.
Starting point is 00:24:11 Travis. Travi. Travi for the boys. It was for the boys. He is for the boys. That was a really bad video. Oh, man. Worst ever done.
Starting point is 00:24:21 I like him a lot. I like him a lot. We watched it again. He's an awesome guy. Find it, TJ. I want to watch it again. If we never roasted that may he probably wouldn't be awesome he wouldn't be trapped yeah he probably would have been hired he's probably good at his job he's very damn good counts have grown up that's the wrong horse said i retract he's an alabama fan though
Starting point is 00:24:41 that must be nice It must be It really must be Oh they're gonna get worked on My mom and son They're gonna get worked First day at Barstool Sports Look at the fourth comment Damn you're gonna get roasted on the yak
Starting point is 00:25:16 the hangar wasn't cooperating the boys definitely the tie died Travis's for the boys Linking with the other intro. Intro solely? Yeah. Nervous. Gambling cave was the move. Oh, no. D1 in the book. That, no. That was it. That was it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:48 He spent more time picking out his outfit than he did working. Yeah. Good fit, though. Gambling Cave was the move. Nervous. Nervous. Can you do the emoji? What's the emoji?
Starting point is 00:26:02 He did, like, the... Nah, I can't do that shit. Never could. What was the emoji? He did like the. No, I can't do that shit. Never could. What was the question? Oh, emoji movie. We played the Ice Dogs yesterday in the dozen. Oh, yeah. The worst team ever, but very entertaining.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Keith Yandel said the emoji movie. We had to guess how much the box office was. Yeah. I guess 1.1 billion. Yeah, just edged out Star Wars. Joey Chestnut, they had another question. It was like the bonus round. He asked, Jeff said, how many medals does Michael Phelps have?
Starting point is 00:26:35 And Joey Chestnut guessed nine. I think he won nine in a single Olympics. He won eight gold medals. They're very entertaining, though. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Pete D'Ando pulled an all-time. He sunked us. I don't know if you can Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Heath Yandel pulled an all-time. He songed us.
Starting point is 00:26:46 I don't know if you can find the clip, TJ, but he songed us bad. Yandel's the best. I see the hockey guys say that all the time. What does that mean? It's like faking you out. Oh, okay. Yeah. Oh, he made you a pigeon.
Starting point is 00:26:57 I think it's when a defender has the puck behind their own net, and they're coming out with the puck, and they fake like they're going to pass it up and whoever's forechecking will get deked out and they'll go around them and they'll yell song. Like a teardrop. Song. Song. Song.
Starting point is 00:27:17 The only move I love in hockey is when you're skating and you've got a guy behind you and you let go of the puck and it's like- Oh, yeah. You let go of the legs and you keep skating and then the guy picks it up behind you. Yeah just you let go of the puck and it's like oh yeah legs and you keep skating and the guy picks it up behind you yeah sick i love how every hockey player becomes the same guy yeah they're all the same dude and it's great too because like no matter where like a hockey player is from they all end up with a canadian accent yep and then a nickname that ends in ey yeah one of my favorite movies is goon. Great movie. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:46 Not great. Stifler's in it, right? No, it's so fun. I'm going to step back. Good. Stifler's in it? Yeah. Oh, Brandon, you got to see that movie, dude. Greek underground gay porn hard.
Starting point is 00:27:54 You don't have to. Sounds good. I'm going to watch it. Yeah, yeah. I'm sold. TJ, I think he does it. Here it is. A debut in 1998, Milan had to have played his entire career with his Western Conference
Starting point is 00:28:03 team until retiring in 2013. 35 seconds. What do we think, boys? Both teams have all their lifelines. LA. Oh! No, no, no, no. I don't think
Starting point is 00:28:18 Yans is smart enough to do that on purpose. We will go with the LA Kings. Final? Yes. Oh, you mother... We didn't know it. that on purpose we will go with the la kings final yes he songed us we did beat him like 16 to 4 but that was an all-time move yeah that's a they win yeah they won the game. So good. That's great. Marty's team is Keith Yandel and Joey Chest. I know.
Starting point is 00:28:53 They are, again, I asked them during the match, I was like, how did you guys get into this league? Because I thought there was a play-in tournament. Yeah. But I guess they got the fan vote. I'm happy the fans voted for them because they are so entertaining. But it is. Will they win a game? No, it's it's
Starting point is 00:29:05 if you see them on your schedule it is like alabama playing mcneese state okay it's you you just don't even have to show up you get to have fun yeah yandall's pretty good but mush and chestnut just got nothing going on up there i don't know if you could say yandall's pretty good he really didn't have a lot they did not They did not have a lot of answers. And that's what you need in a game like that. Yeah, and they were doing, they're perfect, all three of them together, because they confuse each other. They had that question, the big question that was like all time just misdirection,
Starting point is 00:29:37 just like one of them saying one thing, then they think the equation's another. Yeah, very entertaining team. Going to be a fan favorite. They should just do a fan vote to is another. Yeah. Very entertaining team. Going to be a fan favorite. They suggest you just do a fan vote to the finals. Yeah. Ice dog in the finals. The points don't matter. Maybe Brandon could win one for once.
Starting point is 00:29:56 Oh, man. What's up? Brandon's pissed off. I thought you were sitting there. Brandon's mad. That's fine. Why are you mad? I'm not mad.
Starting point is 00:30:04 Why are you mad? Well, you just made a joke. I was reacting to your there. Brandon's mad. That's fine. Why are you mad? I'm not mad. Why are you mad? Well, you just made a joke. I was reacting to your joke. Madly? Mad. Truly. Mad. All right.
Starting point is 00:30:10 You're being savage right now. No, you're being savage. Arthur Molly, I'm a savage. No. You're being a savage. It's a garden. Savage. Savage garden.
Starting point is 00:30:22 Truly mad. The first time I ever got horny is when I... Never mind. Keep going. Savage Garden has that song about bathing with somebody in the sea. And that was the first time I realized you could bathe with a woman. Yeah. That was the first time I got horny.
Starting point is 00:30:37 That is a hot lyric. Isn't that song Truly Madly Deeply? No. Is it that? No. That is the same song. That's the same song. That's the pub song. That's the pub song.
Starting point is 00:30:45 What's their other song? They have another big one. Huge one. It's not Macarena, but it's like... No, it's not fucking Break Me, Shake Me. It's like... Like a chicka chicka cola. No, sing it.
Starting point is 00:31:05 Chicka cherrya Cola. No, sing it. Side. Range. Chicka Cherry Cola. Yeah. Oh. I don't know. The sound. He's a great music. But I don't know if I need you. Ooh, I know I want you.
Starting point is 00:31:17 I know I need you. Ooh, I'm dying to find out. No, that's not it. Ooh, I want you. I don't know if I need you. So that's them, huh? Yeah. That's the Savage Garden.
Starting point is 00:31:30 That's Nick and Kyle. A lot of people. They're Australian. I believe you're right. You didn't answer my Final Jeopardy text the other night. Oh, fuck. You never don't answer those. I was worried something was wrong.
Starting point is 00:31:44 What was it? It probably was. I follow Final Jeopardy things on TikTok, and when I see one that I think he would like, you never don't answer those I was worried something was wrong what was it? I follow Final Jeopardy things on TikTok and when I see one that I think he would like I send it to him and he always answers really quickly I can't really remember Native Americans called it Oquita or wide water
Starting point is 00:31:59 Pierre Lemoine would rename it for a countryman Oklahoma? Pierre Lemoine would rename it for a countryman. Yeah. Oklahoma? Water? Wide water and you went with Oklahoma. Yeah, I'm going to stick with Oklahoma.
Starting point is 00:32:17 Close. Like Pontchartrain. Oh. That wouldn't have been. Oh, yeah, French, yeah. I guessed the Mississippi River, but I was wrong as well. I sent you a Brandon Walker fan cam yesterday, and you didn't react to it at all.
Starting point is 00:32:29 Mississippi River is just named after Mississippi, isn't it? Huh? Yeah. I don't know. I would think. You sent it at 1030. I'm in bed by 9. No, you're not. You're in couch by 2 a.m.
Starting point is 00:32:38 I'm usually in bed by 9. Oh, he's got to change his whole schedule. He's a morning person. Yeah, I'm a new guy now. And I did watch the video. It was on. Yeah, it was something. You got a fan cam, man. He's a morning person. Yeah, I'm a new guy now. And I did watch the video. Yeah, it was something. You got a fan cam, man.
Starting point is 00:32:47 That's awesome. Well, yeah, it was a lot. I mean, I don't know. It was good. I enjoyed it. Thank you. I appreciate that. Where can you find it?
Starting point is 00:32:54 I just sent it to Teej. I found it by him sending it to me. Where did you find it? I got a DM to me. Oh. I have a dozen follow-up question, KB. In my match against Dave's team, against ZD, Dave called you for his geography question.
Starting point is 00:33:09 I know, I missed the call. And you didn't answer. That was a tough one. And we were all laughing, wondering if, like, you were scared of Dave or if, like – because what must that be like to be in your shoes and unannounced out of nowhere? Seeing and missed calling Dave. Yeah, Dave Fornoy is calling you.
Starting point is 00:33:22 You straight up missed it. You didn't, like – I missed it. Yeah, Dave Fortnoy's calling you. You straight up missed it. You didn't like... I missed it. Should have charged him $10 for the call. Oh, Brandon. The comment section. That's not the comment section. The chat has been spamming paywall comments the entire show. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Well, I mean, Dave had a video
Starting point is 00:33:40 explaining it. I know people are going to... I know... I understand why people are upset. It makes perfect sense perfect sense yeah and the timing's bad After Black Friday the timing's bad after Black Friday The first three episodes coming out And then having to do this it sucks I guess the only thing I would Say is
Starting point is 00:33:55 For anyone who thinks that this was a plan We don't We're so stupid we're like we would Never be able to pull this off and we never would It sucks though I don't Know where I don't know where Dave stupid we're like we would never be able to pull this off and we never would um it sucks though i don't know where i don't know where dave's gonna land on it uh youtube like it having to do it either on barstool tv or pay-per-view sucks youtube was it was it's the perfect show for youtube and it was huge we would in a perfect world we'd want it to be on youtube
Starting point is 00:34:22 but i do i do respect the fact that dave's like we'd want it to be on YouTube. But I do respect the fact that Dave's like, we're not going to edit the show. But it sucks. The whole thing sucks. I don't know. I think he was deciding what to do. Are people still on that theory? Yeah, and I get it.
Starting point is 00:34:39 It's not even the money, I don't think, because $10, I understand people have different financial situations, so I'm not going to look down on anything, but I think most people don't think the $10 is the problem. I think it's the fact that they saw the first three episodes and then now- It's the precedent. You're expecting this to be free. Right, but I guess my only response to that is
Starting point is 00:34:57 this is not something that we ever would plan or do on purpose. It's circumstances. That's not a money grab no it's no it's trying to recoup the fact that we spent a lot of money to create this and now we're not going to get as much money because youtube is taking it down and like the advertisers you know like all this everything changes yeah yeah the whole thing sucks i wish youtube would just have a little bit of common sense and be like hey he doesn't actually want to blow up someone's house yeah there are some crazy fucked up videos on
Starting point is 00:35:30 youtube but the fact that right is getting called out is and i didn't realize dave was on kirk show today i didn't realize we're like one strike away so i think that also changes it yeah and that's a huge part of our business so So you can't risk that. But yeah, I think he's going to decide this weekend what the situation is going to be. And I do appreciate anyone who supports us and will pay $10. I think it's worth it. I think it's like seven hours of incredible content that is going to be awesome. So anyone who does decide to buy, if we go that route, thank you.
Starting point is 00:36:07 I get the annoyance, though. Yeah, I get the annoyance. No one's being unreasonable here, I don't think, including Dave. I think he's the problem that popped up. It's like we've got to figure out what to do. It's a great show, though. I hope everyone, if it does go behind a paywall, I hope that, you know. We should have the barstool bars air it for free. That's actually a good call.
Starting point is 00:36:31 A little watch party? Yeah. Bad idea. So if you don't want to buy it, go to the bar. That right there is not a bad idea. That's a good idea. Thanks, man. Oh, I just got upgraded from not a bad idea.
Starting point is 00:36:50 Yeah, no, that's a good idea. Let it marinate a little bit, baby. It was a good idea. Yeah. That was a good idea. That ain't no bull junk, brother. Ain't no bull junk. It's bully talk.
Starting point is 00:37:00 Fasoli only talks in Barstool. Barstool-ism. That was crazy. When we're on the road with him, it's the same thing. Yeah. He wants everything to be banana land, everything to be electric, and sometimes it ain't. He doesn't fuck with squids. No.
Starting point is 00:37:14 Never has. Or hardos. Everything's 10x. Yeah. It's Viva Hours. Oh, Brandon Fam Cam Can't stop and tell your sister Happy Birthday
Starting point is 00:37:28 All you can say is just Happy Birthday She's right here Happy Birthday Candace I hope this year Yeah Candace Big fin your mouth Motherfucker Wrecked
Starting point is 00:37:40 Brandon Fam Cam These are the best moments of Brandon Walker Sucking on my titties. That's one of my favorite clips of yours. Love this. Watching this, I was like, you're the most necessary guy for this show to work. This is amazing. Truly the best of. Oh, man. The little finger.
Starting point is 00:38:41 How did you not like this? I love it. I love it. The randomness of it is. This made me realize. I watched this and I was like this? I love it. I love it. I just love it. The randomness of it is. This made me realize. I watched this and I was like, I fucking love Brandon. Yeah. He's the best. We need more of these of you.
Starting point is 00:38:55 My ass just never quite comes out. Never does. It's so shy. Your ass is hiding. Oh. There's so many moments you just sitting like that is always so funny well thank you
Starting point is 00:39:18 whoever made it appreciate it long summers on the Yak credit thank you thank you thank you very much Yak Discord coming soon
Starting point is 00:39:24 by the way. Fantastic. I still don't 100% know what Discord is, but... It's a community building tool. I know Anus uses it a lot. We drop exclusive merch on there. That and Reddit. One is forum-based.
Starting point is 00:39:40 One is, like, you could talk to each other in voice chats and video chats. What is forum-based? Fuck! Oh man. Damn it. That was a big tech answer. A big tech.
Starting point is 00:40:02 Does Discord, do the people on Discord end up hating us? No, no, because we're in there yucking it up. They ended up falling in love. That would be the difference, I would imagine. Oh, yeah. But there's different chat rooms. So the only overarching thing is that they're anus listeners,
Starting point is 00:40:14 but then there's sports talk, there's weed talk, gambling, and merch submissions for us, which has really helped. What social media platform does the act get the most hate on? Who loves the most? Barstool main page. All main page comment section. That's just the nature of Reddit. I don't think there's any
Starting point is 00:40:35 show fan page team. You could even do team. Like sports team. It doesn't just devolve into we hate this. yeah but i think that's its purpose it's a way to right off steam you're never yeah yeah it's not like a that's what it's what it is you're just hanging out online but it does always just end up being like this show sucks i was in the uh i was being a real cocksucker in the game of thrones one for a while
Starting point is 00:40:59 yeah that's exactly like it's just a place to voice your complaints. It's just a lot of complaints. It is what it is. And the YouTube chat just usually owns us. Yeah. Which I like. Their show too. So, can I show you some stats? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:18 Sure. I like stats. Oh. Whoa. This is the Yak Challenge. Oh, this is cool. challenge oh this is oh holy shit tj wait up did you make it i didn't do it i didn't uh take the credit i did it oh my god so wait what do we have so i can zoom in there's i got a bunch of submissions from a bunch of different people i pulled up two here but this guy did record books so all of the red numbers on the right half of the screen the red numbers are the worst score in that sport split and the green numbers are the best score in that sport split This is a conditional formatting king right here. So this is also
Starting point is 00:42:06 okay, so so Moog, you hold the bags record, if I'm reading it correctly. He got it on his first throw. But you can see, wait, can you rank on the total time? Oh wait, is that how it's ranked? Total time? So the greener
Starting point is 00:42:24 the better. The other one was. What's the total optimal time. So the greener, the better. The first one, the other one was. What's the total optimal time? Which I assume is the best segment. Best of each. The best of each segment put together would be how fast. So it says that top row. So, TJ, if you slide over to the left. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:42:39 The first row, it says bags time, 2.16. So that's the best bag time. Soccer, 5.55. Yeah, add all those up. And that is... That would be sum of best. Yes. Wait, so is my top right now, is that my number one run?
Starting point is 00:42:56 Or is that all my averages? Your best time is 86. And that's what I got in all of those? And so out of your... No, this is your best in every individual discipline Oh I'm going to look through this Got it
Starting point is 00:43:11 Look at me with the 31 second Cornhole That's the worst They're still filling in some information Wait, wait So Big Cat's done it Three times, sorry I was just going to say, Stu bought it all the way bottom right B-ball air balls some information wait this is for the game wait so wait so big cat's done it three times sorry well i was just saying stew bought it all the way bottom right b ball air balls 14 oh awesome
Starting point is 00:43:32 get out of here goals missed air balls okay go ahead nick sorry so it's cool it's like it has your three times your your average finishes like five point third on the list, which is damn good. Wait. So but does it have what I did in my best run? Believe so. Can I see that? Yes. Oh, this is cool.
Starting point is 00:43:54 So this tells you like what to the. Oh, here we go. All right. So, yeah. Wait. Yes. Scroll over. So it's on your best in your best run, bags, nine seconds.
Starting point is 00:44:07 Soccer, 14 seconds. Wiffle, 18. Football, basketball, sportful. So it was a full... This top row is your best run. Got it. Can we combine his best run of all three, like of your three attempts to see what the time would be?
Starting point is 00:44:21 Oh. Yeah, I guess you can do anything. Yeah, I guess so. Wow. Go back to the record book tab. Give me a piece. It was some of the spreadsheet. Some of the optimals, the top row, the 2.16.
Starting point is 00:44:35 That's overall of everyone. That's what I'm saying. I want to combine all of those to find out what the best possible. It's not one of those. If all of us combined into one... Yes, what is the... When Dan set the record, we're all like, no one's ever going to break that.
Starting point is 00:44:52 Let's sort by best times of each one. Even the records now are not the best possible. You could just... Right there. I'll do the math. 2.16. Do you know Excel? I don't know Excel. The cells are locked, so he can't even... Oh. Plus... Hmm. Do you know Excel? I don't know Excel. The cells are locked, so he can't even hop. Plus 5.55.
Starting point is 00:45:10 What's next? Plus 12.45. Plus 16.03. Plus 20. This is awesome. Are you doing like an addition to solve this? 120 seconds. It's already been done, right? That's better. It doesn't make sense. to solve this 120 seconds yes there's a looks like there's an error on this yeah because big cats oracles I have the fastest sparkle no I think I think what
Starting point is 00:45:36 you did I didn't do it yeah that's for cool looks correct these are all the fastest yeah oh okay So this makes sense. So these greens. Go do those greens. 2.16 plus 3.39. So Big Cat just had a stellar, like, mostly golds. Yeah. Wow.
Starting point is 00:45:55 Damn. I want to try and build it out. Speedrunners use this, like, splitting software that we could try and get put in on here. That would be sick. Brandon, you and I don't have the best of anything 55 seconds oh we're just that's the good 56 so 56 seconds sub one is possible probably like second or third and fifth yeah sub one is possible if you do the best time of everything okay there we go so that's like the four minute mile that we're going for Roger Lannister nice pool shout out to whoever made. So that's like the four-minute mile that we're going for. Roger Lannister. Nice pool.
Starting point is 00:46:27 Shout out to whoever made that. Yeah, that's really cool. That's awesome. They probably aren't a very good employee of wherever they are. Or a good people person. Definitely not. You don't have social skills. Non-eye contact kind of guy.
Starting point is 00:46:40 But you rock. Yeah. Noah, appreciate it. I have a question. Yeah. Oh yeah, let's get him. Let's do the high noon ad read and then let's get Nicky Smokes up here for the book report. Ladies and gentlemen.
Starting point is 00:46:57 Guess what? The high noon game day pack is back. That's right. It includes limited edition fan faves, pear and cranberry, along with black cherry and grapefruit. Made with real vodka, real juice, 100 calories, gluten-free, no added sugar. The High Noon Game Day Pack is a fall exclusive, which means it's here for a good time, but not a long time.
Starting point is 00:47:16 You can visit highnoonspirits.com before your next tailgate to find a pack near you. We prerecorded an episode. Am I allowed to say that? Yeah. And I had a pair and uh you had two sneak i i had two that's right yeah of the cranberry yeah so so we pre-recorded a of the cranberry not of the pair no i had one pair we we pre-recorded a bonus i had one
Starting point is 00:47:41 wiffle ball derby wiffle Ball Home Run Derby episode. It's not going to be a full yak, but it's just going to live on the yak YouTube, so subscribe. You didn't have the pair. I had one pair. You said you had two. Nicky, come on in. Come on in. Not yet.
Starting point is 00:47:58 What's he got? Oh, no. Is he going to smoke one of us? I think he's looking to smoke. We're on to him now. That was stupid. Why'd he do that? Where is he? I think he's looking to smoke. We're on to him now. That was stupid. Why'd he do that? Where is he?
Starting point is 00:48:09 I think I know what he's doing. We all agree. Let's all make an alliance right now that we'll fight him if he comes in and tries to get one of us. I have an idea of what he's about to try to do. He's calling me. He knows I'm live. I just had a call from no caller. We just saw him. He's sitting right. He knows I'm live. I just had a call from no caller. I just saw him. He's sitting right outside this door.
Starting point is 00:48:29 I think he's waiting for the one person that's not here. I'm going to try to smoke him. I'm just going to go pants him. He's coming back. Is he coming back? Oh, no. I feel like he's just going to shoot us with a paintball gun. Yeah, I know. That's his version. That was a seamless kind of move there, no. I feel like he's just going to shoot us with a paintball gun. Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:48:45 That's his version. That was a seamless kind of move there, guys. Yeah, it was cool. This is like a Wes Anderson shot. You watch that door. I'll watch this door. He's got us on high alert. Also, he was invited.
Starting point is 00:49:01 Wait, is that? No, that's Fasoli. Oh, Fasoli's got to be filming himself. He's obviously there. He's coming right here. He's coming right here. Yeah. I ain't with it. Oh, no. Also, he was invited. Wait, is that? No, that's Fasoli. Oh, Fasoli's coming right here. He's coming right here. Yeah. I ain't with it. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:49:09 Oh, no. Grab him, Brandon. Grab him. No, get him. Grab him. Oh, motherfucker. He's trying to pie him. He's trying to smoke him.
Starting point is 00:49:25 Put it down. Put it down. Put it down. Put it down. Put it down. Put it down. I trust him fooling. I know he wouldn't do that. It's only for mook. He's the cream pie god.
Starting point is 00:49:35 Hand it over. Hand the cream. Hand it over. Oh, fuck. God damn it! You got smoked. Got smoked. That wasn't meant for you.
Starting point is 00:49:56 It was meant for me. It wasn't meant for you, Brandon. It was you getting it. It was fight or flight, and I flew. That wasn't even meant for me. It was meant for Mook. I flew. That wasn't even mook. It was meant for mook. You're the cream pie god. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:50:10 I was trying to cream pie you. Brand covered in cream. You got smoked so bad. What a prank. That doesn't mean a cow for you either. That sucks. You still have one. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:50:24 You just took one for mook, dude. I'm sorry. It tastes pretty good, doesn't it? You're not even putting the care in the pie. It's just whipped cream. I know. That's the whole point. Brandon got smoked.
Starting point is 00:50:38 I'm going to go clean. Yeah. Sorry, B-Lock. Love you, old man. The thing we we taped earlier hasn't been released yet no which sucks yeah um when i do my book report though can i sit over there so i could see the screen yeah sure yeah sit in brandon's chair i don't think he's coming back anytime oh i burned you bro all right All right, Nicky Smokes. Time for the book report.
Starting point is 00:51:07 Have a fucking day, mate. I can't believe you were... Dude, I love you. I don't want to spoil anything from the other, but... I know, I love you, but that's like the easiest prank out of all of them. Yeah. I don't even know if that's a prank. No, it is.
Starting point is 00:51:21 It's a prank. It's like assault. No, it's a prank. Prank. I can't say anything, but yeah. If he says it's a prank, It's like assault. No, it's a prank. Prank. I can't say anything. You've got smoke. If he says it's a prank, that's how pranks work. You can do whatever you want if you say it's a prank.
Starting point is 00:51:31 Yeah, you've got smoke. I could have made it way worse. Would you have to wipe your face off? Big deal. I kind of liked it. Yeah. I was ready to come back. You're like a little creamy now.
Starting point is 00:51:40 Again. Again. I have to redo yours because Daveave denied it dave denied oh yeah i texted dave i was gonna have two male strippers dress as cops and come in here and arrest titus and then they were gonna take their shirt off and start dancing i'm so excited about the fucking prank the smoke era yeah and then something else i texted dave well i called him at first he didn't answer and i was like yo dave and i told him the idea and at the end i go good to go and he just Smoke era. It's something else. I texted Dave. Well, I called him at first. He didn't answer. And I was like, yo, Dave.
Starting point is 00:52:06 And I told him the idea. And at the end, I go, good to go. And he just said no. I'm curious how everyone else thinks I would have handled two male strippers handcuffing me against my will. Horribly. As Nicky Smokes is laughing. I think it would have been hilarious.
Starting point is 00:52:22 I mean Listen smokes He smoked he's gonna smoke us Wait so on a 1 to 10 scale Where's the pie What pie there's no pie The cream pie Yeah that's gotta be light right Yeah that's dumb light
Starting point is 00:52:38 So it's like 1 is it a half Yeah that's like a 1.5 And that's cause I love mook like mook's my guy so brandon's gonna get a 10 oh brandon's is brandon's is my new favorite hold on hold on just so we're clear you pieing brandon in the face was actually mooks yes so that doesn't count it doesn't count for walker that doesn't count no no so he's basically getting a two i would love it though if smokes' pranks are all just pie-oriented. Like, the more vicious the prank, the bigger the pie. I'm getting the producers, too.
Starting point is 00:53:14 Two pies. You're getting the producers, too? Yeah. He said he's going to fuck my world up. Oh, my God. You're so incredibly stupid. I love you so much. Yeah, he's so much yeah he's so good you're so good love you guys job i am good at my job because my job just requires me to be me which is stupid
Starting point is 00:53:33 it's all you've ever known right you're dumb but yeah i love it born to do it some would say yeah yeah oh my god all right so you got the book report We're good after yesterday We found a common ground By the way the results of the poll The anonymous poll is 25 people voted for lunches 2 people voted for Christmas I was one of them
Starting point is 00:53:54 I just want a little camaraderie I know I'm gonna figure it out Just take me out Just me and you We'll go out Just get a table And I just want to sign the test. Holiday party's back on.
Starting point is 00:54:06 Big Cat loves smoke. That's it. This is all worked out for the better, because I think what we're going to do is we're going to take the money for lunches, and Chef Donnie's going to make a lot of the lunches. We're going to have people do videos helping him cook lunches for everyone. We also got a magician every single day. That just got added in and then i think we'll do we'll do like a holiday uh like a white elephant no me and you need to go
Starting point is 00:54:32 to the club together that's that's my thing okay all right that's it he wasn't hearing anything you were saying yeah free lunch fuck all that so my initial inclination was actually correct that like i didn't because like part of the calculus of like the holiday party lunches things was like holiday party i'm worried about nicky smokes being a liability so i was correct in everything i thought yeah i mean i definitely would be alive somehow convince you that his way of thinking is how we all think yeah right right but now if there's no holiday party you got to go to the club with him correct so but i can handle that. I can handle that. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:55:06 You can't. No, Big Cat definitely can. All Irish can buy so fast. Yeah. Show up, buy a bottle, buy a bottle, and leave. I was the other one for holiday party. I don't eat lunch. So did you vote even though you don't eat lunch?
Starting point is 00:55:20 I voted for holiday party. My dog. So then it should be three votes because I know JoJo voted for the holiday party too. So someone's lying. Okay. Somebody just didn't do the Google form. We will do something as an office. Was it you?
Starting point is 00:55:30 Did you vote on the Google form? I bet he didn't submit. No, I did. I did. In terms of camaraderie, we'll do something for the office. All right. That's all I ask. It's a brotherhood here.
Starting point is 00:55:38 It's a privilege to work here. Yeah. You know, you guys do all your shows all the time, but we got to get everyone involved. Yeah, no, I agree. I agree. That point was correct by you yeah the point of like january sucks in chicago being able to look forward to like chef donnie making us lunch every day is pretty sick but see i don't know how bad january is in chicago yet yeah also you did you did just lie in your blog where you said that you
Starting point is 00:55:57 get free lunch every day i do get free lunch how it's called oh crustables okay yeah there's a whole box of uncrustables you walk downstairs you downstairs, you eat an Uncrustable, and you pair it with the mozzarella cheese stick, and it's unbelievable. The what cheese stick? The mozzarella. The mozzarella. The mozzarella.
Starting point is 00:56:12 I just wanted to hear you say it again. Your name is Chuck. My name is Charles Nicholas. Oh, shit. I didn't know that. What? Don't ask me. Like, my mom's called me Nick from birth.
Starting point is 00:56:23 Yeah, what's your real name, Charles? Charles Nicholas. Chuck. Chuck. Don't call me Chuck. I don called me Nick from birth Yeah what's your real name Charles Charles Nicholas Chuck Don't call me Chuck I don't want No because Chucky A Chucky pranking us is not as fun
Starting point is 00:56:32 That sucks That's terrible Chuck is just a bad name Stay with Nick No offense to the Chucks out there It's your name No it's not It's fucking Charles
Starting point is 00:56:40 You have like one of the best Chucks ever Yeah we do have a good Chuck We do have a good Chuck. We do have a good Chuck. I'm on ten toes. I'm staying on business. Oh, my God. All right, so book report.
Starting point is 00:56:57 Yeah, TJ, pull it up, please. This is great. You read the whole book? Yeah, front to cover. Whole book. Wait, did you look at this book? Front to cover. Front to cover the title. He read the title. Hold on. Front to cover whole book wait did you look at this front to cover the title hold on front to cover TJ did you watch this
Starting point is 00:57:10 before yeah it's just pictures okay alright good alright so it's a new yak tale written by the yak and then that's the condom wrapper I used after I finished reading it oh nice oh nice something Fasoli would never know about yeah nah I was actually pissed that she made me buy condoms anyway that's not why we're here wait what oh yeah she like wanted me to wear
Starting point is 00:57:29 condoms she wouldn't fuck me unless i wore it so i had to buy condoms that's not the point i'm here to talk about the book you put it front and center on this slide shameless plug shameless plug shameless plug all right next slide for what your penis yes all right chapter one leprechaun tease god nick yeah e you know i love you yeah i think you're brilliant but you're not jk fucking rowlings i don't need the harry potter in the deathly hollows part one what are you talking about like you don't tease people is this a book reporter yes gross what are we looking at both let me do how i do so you're right you're right So the book starts with what sounds like Connor Griffin, like depressed, looking through his closet, finds like some raggedy ass Reds t-shirt.
Starting point is 00:58:13 Yeah. And then it ends with a tease. If you're going to tease, why is it not being teased at the end of the book? Like, I want to know if this leprechaun sticks his dick in my mouth or not. So the premise is it's a leprechaun tease god and the reader gets teased. Yeah, but then you get teased, but there's no follow-up. That's a tease!
Starting point is 00:58:30 There's no series! Like, there needs to be a part two! That's what a tease is! Yes, but there's always an end of the tease. The leprechaun is a tease god and I tease the reader. So why don't you tease me at the end? Why don't you tease me at the end of the book?
Starting point is 00:58:44 I didn't choose the chapter. What do you mean? Because then it's like a cliffhanger. Because, like, I get teased and then it goes to chapter two So why don't you tease me at the end? Why don't you tease me at the end of the book? I didn't choose the chapter. What do you mean? Because then it's like a cliffhanger. Because I get teased, and then it goes to chapter two, and I'm in fucking giggity land with Mook. Like, there's no... All of our chapters are pretty disconnected.
Starting point is 00:58:55 But that's why his should be the end. Okay. So I leave with... No, no, that's fair. All right, fair, fair, fair. And wait, can we at least look at how I plugged in Harry Potter and I found a picture of Nick Tarani dressed as Harry Potter? Did you Google my name plus Harry Potter?
Starting point is 00:59:08 Yes, and that's what popped up. I want to look like Contestant St. Vincent. All right, next slide. Next slide. Chapter two, Devious Hobgoblin Pussy Junkie, written by Mook. You literally just plugged yourself in Family Guy and wanted to fuck Quagmire. It was my world. What, Mook?
Starting point is 00:59:24 Oh, my world. What? Mook? Oh my goodness! Holy shit, he got him! No one saw this coming! Oh! Yeah! Oh! Let's go back! Let's go back!
Starting point is 00:59:42 Let's go back! Let's go. Let's go. Oh, my days. All right, Nicky Smokes, thanks for the book report. We'll see you next week. That's it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:57 Let him do his thing. Demon time. Let's watch him shower. I'm really going to fuck his life up. Oh, no. Next slide, bitch. How does this end? Don't worry about it. his life up oh no next slide bitch this end don't worry about it what all right next all right he he fucks quagmire no i don't fuck him i no you destroyed him with your cum i read the fucking book okay and then he wait and then angry book report is the funniest he is the only one that read it yeah all right so then after after he kills quagmire
Starting point is 01:00:23 he runs out of cum and he calls on me to fill him with my cum so he can have more cum to come back to life. But me fucking him... No, you appear out of nowhere. Wait, you fuck... I was called in to save Mook, and I had to fill him with cum to bring him back to life, and it made me the new cream pie god.
Starting point is 01:00:42 You're doing an Angry Booker with cake on your face. Angry Booker with cake. The best bit of it. face next chapter it honestly blends perfect okay good where's this dumb ass motherfucker just go where's brandon walk this is the dumbest fucking chapter i ever read he came up with a character that has 18 dicks none of them worked instead of having 18 different bitches on your dick he decides to use the two dicks that work to fuck you okay why would you fuck big cat i don't get it you have 18 dicks get some bitches on your dick please okay next chapter yeah i like this this is a speedy run no tj get out here just let him get out here tj tj get out here oh oh fuck okay give me some elbow okay it only took three fucking chaps four chapters for me to get someone to get some fucking pussy okay all right Give me some elbow Okay It only took three fucking chapters
Starting point is 01:01:25 Four chapters for me to get someone to get some fucking pussy Okay, alright The whole time everyone's just Fucking dudes Fucking this You could have had pussy Mine was fill in the blanks You filled it in with dick
Starting point is 01:01:36 There shouldn't be fill in the fucking blanks You're an author Alright, next chapter No, no, no TJ TJ TJ's a fucking beast He's got three bitches Birds birds, majestical creatures.
Starting point is 01:01:48 Fuck you. Riding them. Riding them all over the place. It ends up being a VR set, and it was all a dream. You're dead now. You are a dead man walking, bro. Dead man. Next slide.
Starting point is 01:02:01 Next slide. All right. All right. Shout out Che, Rock Hard Gremlin. I can't blame his character. The first time I ate pussy, I fucking came too. But at least let him stick a tip in. No, just let him cook.
Starting point is 01:02:13 We'll do questions at the end. We'll do questions at the end. His character ate this bitch's pussy and fucking came and died. He didn't even get to stick a tip in. That's kind of funny, too. Okay. Okay. Next slide. Next slide. He's getting even, like, get to stick with it. That's kind of funny, too. Okay. Okay. Next slide.
Starting point is 01:02:25 Next slide. He's getting his anger up. All right. Chapter six, third-party bull force nymph. I just put the three closest psychiatrists are fucking Zoff. Bro. He wrote two pages, described himself as a woman getting fucked, and while the guys were coming, they had explosive diarrhea.
Starting point is 01:02:43 Like, you have problems. Next slide. Next slide. Next slide. This is so good. All right, chapter seven, Cyclops that dies post-orgasm. This is basically Kate telling us that she didn't get any dick in the army, so when she finally came home, Beavs blew her guts out and got her pregnant. Okay, okay.
Starting point is 01:03:00 And P.S., don't ever give us a full page of italics because no one's going to read that shit. Next slide. Okay. Chapter eight, check., don't ever give us a full page of italics because no one's going to read that shit. Next slide. Okay. Chapter eight. Check out my boy, KB. Mega titty Yeti. You're way too fucking smart for me.
Starting point is 01:03:13 Like, I thought I was going to get a boner trying to read this, and instead I'm getting a history lesson of the 1996 fucking Egg Bowl. Everything's about you, Brandon Walker. He wrote it. He wants to fucking talk about you all fucking day, bro. Fuck Brandon Walker. I didn't write it. He wrote it. Fuck Brandon Walker. But anyway, go to fucking talk about you all fucking day bro fuck Brandon Walker he wrote it fuck Brandon Walker but anyway go back go back to my powerpoint please if you want one-liners this is the best fucking chapter you describing his dick as Hunter Biden's nose and Michelle Obama's weave funniest thing I've ever heard can I get a fucking napkin
Starting point is 01:03:42 keep going keep going he's getting angrier. Chapter 9, Death Goo Beast. This chapter could not have been any better. You don't get to fuck what you want, and instead, Ben Mincy fucks you because he owns you. You're his bitch. Great chapter. You started it. Great chapter.
Starting point is 01:03:57 Great chapter. Chapter 10. Why is everything about Brandon Walker again? Honestly, I'm glad that you Eiffel Towered his ass to death. Big Cat is the only fucking degenerate that could plug in his game of the fucking year in a sex book, and I'm going to slam the NFC Championship game over. Oh, I forgot I did that. Yes.
Starting point is 01:04:17 I read your book, motherfucker. Nikki Smokes, that was the best book report ever. Legend. Smokes, you got it. Thank you. I mean, we might need to just do book reports of everything now. Yeah. The angry book report is a genre I never knew existed.
Starting point is 01:04:32 Yeah, I need like. I need some fucking clothes. Yeah, what's the. I'm buying your shit. You started with me. I got you in the fucking face, bro. You shit on me. I got you in the face too.
Starting point is 01:04:39 Look at me. You started it. I need Smokes thoughts on Cat in the Hat. You can't prank the prankster. No, I need. That ruins it. We need to have' thoughts on Cat in the Hat. You can't prank the prankster. No, I need to ruin it. But it was very fucking easy. Fucking cat. It was so easy.
Starting point is 01:04:52 You're dead to me. Well, I think Smokes had a little more tact and class. He knew the cream. You could come off easy. You went pudding? Yeah, sure did. That was chocolate cake. See, what Smokes did is he put some substance on a plate and put in your face but now what you gave me a fucking pie i gave you a
Starting point is 01:05:09 fucking face you kind of low brow you're just a little low brow cheap pops yeah he was kind of funny i felt guilty laughing though you came in here for milk and you tangle and instead of fucking tackling him like a fucking man you stood there and froze like a bitch, so I tagged you. Right? And then I got you back. No, bro. You can't get the prankster back. That's not how it fucking works.
Starting point is 01:05:32 Are you really mad? You let me finish, and then you can come at me, bro. Are you really mad? That is how it works. It is how it works. Look at me, bro. Broke every single one of your head. Broke all the prank rules.
Starting point is 01:05:44 In the angels of time, rules. How could you? Whatever I was going to do to you just tripled, and I don't give a fuck. Well, just know whatever you do is coming right back. No, like I'm taking the cars off your tire. Like, I'm stealing your fucking wallet. The car's off your tire. I'm not eating shit again, bro. Cars off the tire.
Starting point is 01:06:01 Your tires. You're dead. Your tires will stay. You're dead stay But your car Say goodbye to your car Carless tires Oh my god I can't get it off
Starting point is 01:06:15 No one's safe I'm going for your family everyone Okay alright It was a joke Now we gotta put the show behind a paywall. So thank you for that. Well, yeah, $25.99. Nicky, I'll say this, though.
Starting point is 01:06:31 Brandon Pine, you added to the book report getting angrier and angrier. Oh, yes. That was a great book. That was all time. That was a 10 out of 10 book report. Thank you. That was fucking high the roast.
Starting point is 01:06:42 You call me in, I deliver. It's what I do. You just fucking went after him. 100 at the pen. You call me in, I deliver. It's what I do. He just fucking went after him. 100 at the pen. Yeah. But you did kind of just take that from him. Oh, do you think I just took it? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:06:53 You'll see. Careful. You'll see. Careful. Remember, you got to. Oh, I know. I will never forget. I just want to go on record saying I think you're the fucking man.
Starting point is 01:07:03 I think Brandon's kind of a pussy bitch. Thank you. And I respect that. I'm very much on fucking man. I think Brandon's kind of a pussy bitch. Thank you. And I respect that. I'm very much on your side. I think everybody here understands pranking besides Brandon. Yeah. Smokes, do me a favor. Look at that door right there.
Starting point is 01:07:14 All right, now, do we have a headdress we can put on him? Oh, no. A what? Oh, you think it says gay. No, it's Native American. Yeah. Oh, that little kid. You think it was a dress a girl was going to wear to suck dick?
Starting point is 01:07:33 A headdress. I literally look like I just ate ass. No. I hope not. It looks like someone put pudding all over you. I got something on my shoe. Damn. Oh, it's on your sleeve.
Starting point is 01:07:44 Is that what you look like after you eat ass? She just shits all over your face. all over it. I got some on my shoe. Damn. Oh, it's on your sleeve. Is that what you look like after you eat ass? She just shits all over your face? I love it. I love eating box. All right, I'm done. All right. You said you came the first time you ate box? Yeah, it was great.
Starting point is 01:07:58 Hands free? Well, like, we were 69ing. Oh, then that. No, but, like, she didn't even get to, like, put. That means you came getting your dick. No, no, she didn't even get to like put That means you came getting your dick. No, she didn't even get to put my dick in her mouth. It was like she was on top of me and I was eating it. Well, she was on her way down and she just got a facial.
Starting point is 01:08:12 She was on her way. Smokes, when are you doing the Yak Challenge? Oh, yeah. I guess I'll watch your head. We're in the middle of our Wiffle Ball video. We'll do it Monday. And the shower we have here is out of service. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:08:26 Just means the camera's not there anymore no it says out of service okay all right well brandon you're brandon you don't get what he has to go through now he has shit thrown all over his face out of nowhere he's gotta go clean it up you wouldn't get this brandon that was a 10 out of 10 smokes appearance that's a fucking barstool jacket you picked up it's just he picked it up off a pile oh oh now oh okay all right this is good did you did you hear that i don't know that he goes that's my favorite fucking jacket brad goes that's just a fucking jay's i fucking love barstool man well this is i'm sorry all right brandon this is yeah that's i'll tell you what i don't i'm a little uncomfortable it was great i got a little
Starting point is 01:09:13 weird yeah it got weird it was smokes had a great appearance for the book report the fact that he he can't take the prank back makes it a little tough for the future pranks. Yeah, that was... He did get pranked back, and then he got... I don't understand how he can't comprehend. It was the exact same fucking prank. The exact same, but it was his favorite jacket. The chocolate was a little more... Chocolate was much. Yeah, whipped cream's not ruining clothes.
Starting point is 01:09:39 I'll be honest, I ran away from smokes. I saw the chocolate cake in the kitchen, and I said, I can't put chocolate face on my boy. Yeah. Yeah, he didn't. That ending brought it back down from a 10 out of 10 to like, should we be worried for ourselves? I have always been worried for us.
Starting point is 01:10:00 I have always at all. When Smokes, remember the first time he talked about pranking everybody, I was like, give us an example of a prank you would do. And he said he wanted to put an airbag on my seat. Oh, yeah. And he sat there lying in the door. 12 feet in the air. If two strippers came in right now dressed as cops and held you down,
Starting point is 01:10:17 what would you do? I would have to punch one of them. Yeah. I would absolutely fight. Like, I don't... I mean, there's no world where I'm like, oh, the smokes, you got me. I'm very much going to fight back.
Starting point is 01:10:33 He talks to me about his pranks so he can set them up for on-air. His one for Brandon is dastardly. Like, it's... Brandon's, like, his head will explode. So, TJ, I'm going to implement, knowing that smokes. He's getting fired.
Starting point is 01:10:47 Yeah. Knowing that he can't. TJ, I'm going to, I'm going to sit smokes down and I'm going to say TJ is the official smokes prank arbiter. I'm going to go to you. I got to be, I'll have to be it. Yeah. I guess I'll have to be it. This might just be like, well, let me text you.
Starting point is 01:11:04 Let me text you. Yeah. I don't want to know what this is. I'll text it be it. Fuck. This might just be like the. Let me text you. Let me text you. Yeah. I don't want to know what this is. I'll text it to Vick. All right. I'm going to. We're going to have to put some guardrails in place. It's good that he started out with this one.
Starting point is 01:11:14 Yeah. Guardrails are going to be in place. That was. I mean, that was a chaotic 20 minutes of the act. Yeah. I'm not realizing that was all anger and no like i'm leaning into this right all anger i texted you right oh that's fine if the first word is right right right right exactly yeah right because brandon
Starting point is 01:11:36 if the first word of the thing is right yeah and that's a fine prank. Yeah. That was so fucking good. Oh, he's like the Tasmanian devil. Yeah. He just comes in and just whirls up. And we're just like, what just happened? Everything's upside down. He can't be tamed. Might have to have a talk with Smokes.
Starting point is 01:12:06 For giving him a raise? The book report was great. It was great. Angry book reports are, it's brand new territory. He got so angry at us for all of our chapters. Yeah. Oh, my God. So mad.
Starting point is 01:12:20 He's so pissed. Oh, fuck. Okay. Oh, fuck. Okay. Oh, my God. Do you want a SoCo? Yeah, I'll do SoCo. Brandon, hello. Being young means making arguably tasteful choices.
Starting point is 01:12:36 Maybe it was tailgating in negative five degrees or the elevated surfaces you decided to dance on. Perhaps those weren't the best ideas, but drinking SoCo whiskey, that's always a tasteful choice. Try a SoCo sour shot today. They're so easy to make. One part SoCo, two parts sour mix. Done with this iconic recipe
Starting point is 01:12:53 of mixing stone fruits and spices. SoCo is versatile and easy to drink for every occasion. Occasions like the Gillian Wallow Knockout Party, sponsored by SoCo. Watch rappers, comedians, dwarfs, Philly locals, and more settle their feuds in the ring with no headgear no mercy december 8th at 8 p.m at gilly wallow ko.com make a more tasteful choice and choose soco check out southern comfort.com to learn more and tune
Starting point is 01:13:17 in to the gillian wallow knockout party december 8th at 8 p.m. Eastern. I don't think I've ever had a bad memory with SoCo. Like all great memories of college SoCo shots. Great times. Shout out SoCo. And tune in to that gillianwallowko.com. December 8th, 8 p.m. Brandon? Hey. Yes, Smokes is, I'm going to have a talk.
Starting point is 01:13:42 Oh, no, you're Jordan. Do y'all think he knows that the entire show was involved in that prank? I mean, certainly the whole production room was. I had no idea. I had no idea. What? Well, you were involved. You weren't intentionally getting his eyes over there so I could do it?
Starting point is 01:13:59 No. I sent the text and you moved pretty quick. You guys are such bitches. I don't even know this guy. What is this guy? I don't. Hi, I'm Dan. Who are you?
Starting point is 01:14:09 Okay. I don't know this guy. I have chocolate on my Jordans. He's got chocolate on the J's. We need that as a drop. That's the fattest thing ever said. I got chocolate on my Jordans. That does suck.
Starting point is 01:14:24 That does suck. But Sp folks did get chocolate on his hoodie and it's his favorite and his black hoodie he picked up off the ground here that's gonna be tough to come out of that black probably 75 of them lying around i love barstool the thing is when he got me the first time he didn't mean to. He punched me in the eye as I was fighting back. I think I'm going to have a black eye from it. Really? Yeah, which will be impressive. That would be cool.
Starting point is 01:14:51 It's in here. Oh, yeah, it's dark already. Yeah, you're going to have a black eye. That's kind of sick. It's just a prank, though. It's just like punch a guy in the face. You can't retaliate. He was mad.
Starting point is 01:15:03 It went pie to pie and the next step is taking all the cars off my tires. All the cars off your tires. Granted, it's only one car. We haven't actually asked the real victim in all this his thoughts. Mook, you were of course the victim of this prank, as Smoke said. Brandon, you were not actually the victim.
Starting point is 01:15:18 This was a Mook prank. Are you good? I'm not doing great. Does this count as your prank? Yeah, this was Mook's prank. Your prank good? So are you alright? I'm not doing great. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty traumatizing. Does this count as your prank? Yeah, this was Mook's prank. Your prank is still coming. That was Mook's prank. Brandon, the one good thing is I have implemented guardrails. I will now
Starting point is 01:15:34 be talking to Smokes and he has to clear every prank with me. Okay. I can see how this is going down. When he said that Mook's prank was a 1.5 out of 10, I'll have to accept. Smokes is putting your social security on the dark web.
Starting point is 01:15:50 It's been there forever. Smokes is going to have to reel him in just a little bit. But I still want Smokes to be Smokes. But I got him pretty good. Yeah, you got him pretty good. I was so angry. You got him pretty good. And the worst part for him is he basically proved that he can't take the prank at all.
Starting point is 01:16:09 That's the worst thing that happened to a prankster. No, he can. You just can't get a prankster when he's in the middle of a prank run. Yeah. That's the rule. You tarnished his pride. Afterwards is fine. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:16:21 You look like the kid from Willy Wonka. Yes. He's back. Spokes is back kid from Willy Wonka. Yes. Oh, he's back. Smokes is back. All right. See? Hey, Tasmanian Devil. Why don't you shake hands with Brandon?
Starting point is 01:16:31 That's not a good answer. I don't have my hat. I don't have everything. Those are free hats. I'll get you another one. You swear? Yes. You swear.
Starting point is 01:16:39 You swear. Smokes. Smokes, do you have a chance? Do you think you maybe overreacted just a little bit? No. I think he has dynamite in his pockets right now. Something's happening. He's got a suicide vest.
Starting point is 01:16:51 Can we get a handshake hug situation, please? I don't think you can hug. I'm standing up for the handshake hug. Yeah, you got a hug. You gave him a black eye. I'm still getting him, though. I want that. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:01 Smokes, we are going to implement, though. You're going to have to clear pranks with me. That's fine. I want that. Oh, yeah. Folks, we are going to implement, though. You're going to have to clear pranks with me. That was really funny. That was still awkward. That was the hug of two men between a prank war. I think that made things worse. In the midst of a prank. I didn't like the look of that or the feel.
Starting point is 01:17:23 Oh, no. Look at his hat. Everything he's wearing is free are you gonna get me new clothes yeah they're all over the place you'll get me another one of these hats yeah i know a guy they're all readily available have one by now there's literally a wall of my hats I have a thousand hats that I use as fucking. You know what? I should go get him a hat.
Starting point is 01:17:49 I have the words. I wouldn't complicate this. No, man. You can't show. You can't. You've ended with a hug. You guys are good. What a fucking yak.
Starting point is 01:18:02 Wow. That was chaotic. And a lot of fun Oh Smokes is gonna take that out on On a pussy tonight Oh yeah Yeah He's gonna blow off some steam Fucking Brandon
Starting point is 01:18:14 As he's fucking He's something He's unique He's a character I love him He was at the live show last night Yeah And he came up on stage He's something. He's unique. He's a character. I love him. He was at the live show last night. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:32 He came up on stage, and it was just a dump sack. He got reverse crowd worked. Yeah. Oh, he did? He got roasted by the audience. Oh, I love it. I love it. They were wearing shorts. It was reverse crowd work, yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:44 It was a good show? Yeah, it was great. Great show. I hope so. Thank you, everyone, for coming out. Loving. You good, Brandon? Oh, no, I've got eye damage, but we're good.
Starting point is 01:18:54 We're good. You break your orbital? No, I scraped it. Oh. We're going to have to get you a Rip Hamilton mask. That would be so cool. Oh, that would be cool. Done.
Starting point is 01:19:04 Yeah. You have to podcast. You have to podcast with the mask i'll wear it monday all right all right all right it's his left side of the face what are those called dude probably rip hamilton yeah i would just search rip hamilton was his clear his was clear lebron lebron with a Yeah. Well, Rip wore it for a while because he needed it, and then he was fine, and he was like, I'm just going to keep wearing it. It became like his thing, and he was wearing it for style. That's.
Starting point is 01:19:31 Slash superstition, which is kind of badass, kind of weird. Kind of weird. Somewhere. Maybe both? I don't know. What a good name Rip is, though. All right. It'll be here.
Starting point is 01:19:42 Clear? Yeah. Clear left side. Not black. Yeah, the black would be. it'll be here. Clear? Yeah. Clear, left side. Not black. Yeah, the black would be... It'll be here in 10 hours. Jesus. I'll drive back up here tonight.
Starting point is 01:19:51 I'll just wait. Yeah. What is this mask? Rip Hamilton when he played basketball. It was like clear. It was a broken nose mask is what it was. It was Phantom of the Opera-ish, wasn't it? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:03 That's what Embiid was rocking. Only I could gay that up.. It was Phantom of the Opera-ish, wasn't it? Yeah. That's what Embiid was rocking. Only I could gay that up. It was like Phantom of the Opera. Opera. Oh, yeah. Jalen Brown wore one for a while there. There we go. Yeah, that's cool.
Starting point is 01:20:20 The white guys wear clear ones. Yeah. Done. Be here tomorrow. Perfect. Love it. go yeah that's cool the white guys wear clear ones yeah done be here tomorrow perfect love it uh all right should we spin the wheel we got to finish our wiffle ball home run derby which will be out when are we putting that out there tj when do you want to put it out well you can just put it out at any time right maybe but would you rather do a weekend or immediately after a yak what do people people want? Let the chat decide.
Starting point is 01:20:45 So it's going to be like an hour. It's going to be us playing wiffle ball home run derby. It's fun. I'll put a poll in the chat. We had some fireworks. It started off great. Awesome fireworks.
Starting point is 01:20:55 And it will just live on the YouTube channel, which please subscribe. If you haven't subscribed, you watch every day, please subscribe. It helps us. See what the chat says. TJ, we don't have any strikes do we on this channel no yeah okay good so the the surviving barstool video is given like a more severe thing than anything we've ever dealt with
Starting point is 01:21:17 like they'll take our streams down that video it was like if you don't resolve this you will get a strike and if you get three strikes, your channel is instantly deleted and there's no way to appeal. And just one thing I didn't clarify. It wasn't just the video of Kirk with Jeff that needed edited out. It's future episodes we knew had more things like that. This is the stuff that people should want to see the most. Right, and it's like if that was just it it if it was only that two minute thing i think dave would have been like okay maybe
Starting point is 01:21:49 we can edit it out and just put it back up but there's a lot more of that that would have continuously gotten us in the same spot so that's that's a big part of this whole thing what's up i'm just checking in on brandon and we want people to see it unfiltered. We don't want the kids version. I've been here before. Yeah. All right, let's spin the wheel. You know how many times I've ended the yak covered in something? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:22:16 Many. What would you rather be covered in? Rather be covered in this than anything else. What was the second option? I don't know. Oh. That would have been something. That would have been something, huh?
Starting point is 01:22:38 Yeah, Brandon, piss your pants. This poll is razor thin. Oh, it's a close poll? Oh, this is for the... 51-49. That is razor thin. Oh, it's a close poll? Oh, this is for the... 51-49. That is razor thin. Give it to 49. Let 49 win one.
Starting point is 01:22:51 49 should win one. Yeah, give it to 49, TJ. Push it to 1,000 votes, and I'll end it at 1,000. What is this, for weekend? Are we getting out of here? Yeah. So what did it say? People wanted what?
Starting point is 01:23:08 It's 51 to 49 right now. Which one is winning? Weekend release. Okay. Well, it will be up there, so you can watch it whenever you want. Guess so. Oh, 50-50? Oh, wait.
Starting point is 01:23:22 Hold on. Well, because you said you're giving it to 49 now, so now cook, chat, cook. People are voting for the other. Oh, 50-50. Oh, wait. Hold on. Well, because you said you're giving it to 49 now. So now, cook, Jack, cook. People are voting for the other. Oh, no. Let me bring it up. They're trying to get the one they want. Wait, Kyle, why don't you just pick?
Starting point is 01:23:33 49 now. Why don't I pick? Yeah. Weekend. All right. Weekend. Oh, name wheel. All right. we gave them a chance to pick They didn't
Starting point is 01:23:48 So let's just pick our own Yeah weekend Yeah we're gonna do name wheel next week Yeah we'll get to that Yeah that was a mistake Name wheel Listen we fucked up We were taping a
Starting point is 01:24:01 We were taping a high noon thing before this We done goofed. We goofed. We goofed. All right, after a yak. So we'll do it after a yak on a... Oh, Big Cat eats boogers. What the fuck?
Starting point is 01:24:12 No. All right, that's really fucked up. Dude, what? That's really fucked up. Like, one time. Who cares? I've eaten boogers. Mean.
Starting point is 01:24:23 All right. We will see everyone Monday. Monday, Monday, Monday. And you guys are taking a flight after Wednesdays? I asked Caitlin if she could do after Wednesdays. That would be nice, yeah. Okay, all right. So hopefully we'll do that.
Starting point is 01:24:38 All right. Everyone have a great weekend. We will release the Wiffle Ball Home Run Derby sometime next week. Yeah, TJ? Yep. Sometime next week. Yeah TJ? Yep. Sometime next week after Yak. Maybe we'll do it on
Starting point is 01:24:48 Wednesday after the Yak. That probably sounds like a good day. Yeah. Is that enough time though TJ? Yeah there's not going to be much
Starting point is 01:24:55 editing. Alright perfect. Alright see everyone on Monday. See you Monday. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act. It's the act. Have a good weekend, everybody.
Starting point is 01:25:41 I'll see you in Fortnite tomorrow for the M&M event. All right. Stay safe. Bye.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.