The Yak - Rone Might Have to Fly to Iran | The Yak 11-14-22
Episode Date: November 14, 2022But what if it's winter?You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music.
Hello.
Hello.
Hello, everyone.
Hello. Monday. It's the Yak. Hello, everyone. Hello.
Monday.
It's the Yak.
We're back.
Yep.
It's the Yak.
Just us.
It's the fellas and the lady.
All my ladies in the house.
Nice, Kate.
Hell yeah, Kate.
One hoodie wasn't enough?
It's cold in here.
It's cold.
I've been freezing in here lately.
I told him to crank it.
Yeah.
Get as cold as possible.
Walk to work, big mistake.
Yeah, cold.
Cold out.
Today was when it turned.
Today was the turn.
And I left my apartment.
I could have gone back up to get a heavier coat,
and I was like, nah, I just called an Uber.
Really?
Yeah.
You called an Uber?
Yeah.
This is real lazy.
The worst thing we could talk about?
Weather.
Weather.
It's cold today, guys.
It's a baseline.
It's a baseline.
It tests the mood.
Everyone comment what it's like where you are.
Yeah.
Tell us.
Let us know the weather.
Oh, are you cold?
This helps a lot, albeit with an itch.
But thermos. Oh, yeah. sleeves? With an itch But Thermos
Oh, yeah
Thermal wear
Thermos
Nice
I like that shirt
A lot
So
Yeah, basketball
Yeah
That was awesome
I have grievances
I do too
I would like to
I got a couple bones to pick
I would like to review the tape as well
Because I had a few moments
That I laughed out loud watching back.
I got bones to pick with a man who's not here.
He's a son of a bitch.
He never will be.
Yeah.
He's a son of a bitch.
He goes by the Hut.
I actually had a – well, so for anyone who didn't watch, Barstool Invitational Friday night was incredible.
We did play Yak basketball during halftime of the first game. I thought it was
hilarious. The
reaction online was great.
But we did have the hut.
You paid off the hut.
He gave you an assist. He passed you the ball.
Well, that's because I screamed at him so much.
You guys are mad at the hut? Pissed at the hut.
I thought that was one of the best parts.
I was screaming. I was like, you motherfucker.
No one's here to see you on the court.
He started dunking.
He started dunking.
I was like, dude, what are you doing?
The point of this is we're bad at basketball.
People want to see us fail, and you're just like,
you just think that we're here to see you.
So I walked out.
I was pissed.
I was like, this guy sucks.
And then someone pulled me aside and was like,
the Hut is like a mega fan of yours. And I was like, this guy sucks. And then someone pulled me aside and was like, the Hut is a mega fan of yours.
And I was like, oh, God.
So I went up to him and I said, hey, man, no hard feelings.
But when the stool scenes come out, I said some shit about you.
I think I did, too.
I was like, it's probably going to be bad for you.
Can we pull up the Hut's Boston College video?
He did.
He cried about the chicken fingers.
All-time video.
Yeah, this was one of my favorites for a while.
I didn't realize until after the game that was him.
I would have been starstruck.
I would have been happy to be blocked by him.
Yeah.
So I do like the Hutt now, retroactively.
I got a confession.
I told the Hutt to-
You motherfucker!
I told him to just go off.
I mean, I thought that that was the point of the Hutt, dude.
No!
I thought that we brought in the Hutt. I knew it. I knew it. I mean, I thought that that was the point of the hut, dude. No. I thought that we brought in the hut.
I knew it.
I knew it.
I thought we brought in the hut.
Just your fucking knuckleball bank shot.
I thought that we wanted, I mean, I didn't tell him.
I told him to face guard Brandon is what I told him to do.
Yeah, I was going to say.
Brandon got an extra ball.
I know.
How's TJ?
Then I scored with the extra ball and TJ waved it off.
He went off script, but I was like, face guard Brandon?
You scored on the wrong who? So waved it all. He went off script, but I was like, face guard Brandon. You scored on the wrong hoop.
So did everybody.
Yeah, I did.
I thought that, well, who introduced the idea of the hut?
Pizza Hut.
Yeah.
Exactly.
Right.
Okay, that's a good point.
Okay, we got to the bottom of where the hut came from.
No, but I think that probably Roan, now that he, that's jogged my memory.
I also gave him instructions to just lock down Brandon.
So now that I'm thinking about it, we probably gave the Hut some.
He was having a crisis afterwards.
He was like, did I do too much?
I didn't know how to behave, how to play.
Yeah, no, he did.
Oh, I'd show with the Hut afterwards.
He was cool.
He was lovely.
He was a very nice guy.
We like him.
I wanted to check the ball one time.
I wanted to go at him, and he wouldn't let me do it.
We like him as a human.
We don't like the hut.
When he puts on that jersey, real son of a bitch.
Second, he goes from man to hut.
Yes.
I hate him.
I went up to him before the game, and I was like,
what if you and I formed an alliance thinking I was being just light-hearted?
I think everyone did that.
He was like, yeah, you're the fifth person to come up to me.
I was like, oh.
So it's probably awful.
Ron, you threw an alley-oop to him on the first position.
Those are the two things we talked about, him face-guarding you
and me trying to get him an alley-oop, trying to get him a little.
Because I was trying to go – my goal was to have 12 assists,
and I didn't get anywhere close.
Watch your shot.
We've got to watch the whole thing because I have one moment
that I have to call out that made me laugh out loud.
I have a moment from that shot that nobody's talked about.
Okay, okay.
So, yeah, let's watch some of this.
Yeah, basketball.
Oh, we have the broadcast version.
We're watching the whole thing.
And welcome to the halftime show of the Barstool Invitational from Philadelphia.
I am your halftime host.
They must have had that.
This is a stock footage.
Yeah.
There's no way that we.
It's solely fun.
Which had just started. What the? I am your halftime host. They must have had that. This is stock footage. Yeah. There's no way that we. It's solely fun. Yeah.
Which had just started.
What the?
Oh, he's already fired off a shot.
Sorry, sorry.
And he missed it.
Hey, can we watch, should we watch this?
Does this video have everything or is the one that we posted?
Which one's better?
This is the full one.
Okay.
I was, I told, I think I told you guys, I was like, I'm going to just launch as much
as possible because I was just looking for Roan's moment.
Roan's moment is the best moment ever.
That's why we do this.
Roan literally won everything because all you want to do is hit a big shot
and have everyone go crazy.
It's a non-athlete's dream.
I didn't even know it happened until I saw it on social media afterwards.
I don't know what I was doing.
I was so out of breath. You're in the shot.
You're standing right there. I don't remember him
jumping up on the thing. I don't remember the shot.
You're the thing I was pointing out on the shot.
I threw up afterwards. I have no idea.
It took me until the 12 minute
mark of the second half to catch my breath.
I almost fell asleep on the camera.
I only crossed half court once.
I don't remember the wrong shot happening.
You don't see me in the shot. The best part about it
is you can watch someone
different every single
time.
I feel like I was
playing sports in a
dream.
You can only do like
20%.
Also, we had a little
shorter, a little more
jacked Kyle on the
court.
Also, Dream Mike.
Yeah, that was cool.
I liked him.
He was really cool,
too.
Okay, all right.
So I'm 0 for 1 already.
They also told us right before we went out that if you make a three,
then a whole row of people gets Pizza Hut.
Oh.
So it was two rows.
I'm launching again.
There's the Hut.
And then I'm looking for him.
I'm looking for him.
Hand up, hand up, hand up.
He's late to get me the ball.
And I thought it was an okay pass.
He wasn't ready.
He just should have got it to me earlier.
Okay.
Well, all right.
Other Kyle.
Other Kyle got it.
He got it through a half-court.
What a mess.
Yeah.
That was a good one.
All right.
Here's the – wait.
Hold on.
Che just treating like a real game.
Tass is moving well.
Tass is pickpocketed.
Tass is moving really well.
By the way, I want you to show this to Pat Beverly and be like,
because Kate is Pat Beverly.
She was a dog.
How was this?
How was it?
How was it?
I didn't even know what happened.
So long to get on the table.
Dude, that wasn't bad.
It was four steps up to get onto the table.
Just an incredible moment.
I didn't realize it happened that early.
I didn't know you celebrated.
Yeah, I felt like it took forever to get to that point.
I think I got the rebound, and I was just running the other way,
and I had no clue.
Like, it didn't register at all.
I think we had, like, 12 minutes to play,
and I looked up, went, and I was like,
it has to be almost over, and it was, like, at 10.50.
Yes.
Everyone on the court after Roan's shot at various times
looked at me being like, are we calling this?
And I'm like, no, keep going.
Fun Anthony enjoyed that.
Yeah.
Fun Anthony with the phone.
Oh, wait.
Oh, that's Fun Anthony?
That's Fun Anthony, yeah.
What?
No way, dude.
Wow.
You didn't even know you were playing him?
More powerful. Wait, there's a guy who keeps tipping his, he's got a Jeff cap. way, dude. How light is that? I didn't even know you were more powerful.
There's a guy who keeps tipping his, he's got a Jeff cap.
Oh, yeah.
He tips his Jeff cap.
Oh, yes.
He tips it like 10 times.
Look at him.
Yeah, this is, Kate just went in full dog mode.
No. Is this Kyle or other Kyle? Nate just went in full dog mode. I. Unbelievable shot by Ron. I'm going to be the first one to say. Oh, no.
Is this Kyle or other Kyle?
It's other Kyle.
He's a little bit shorter.
Oh, that's me.
Oh, it's you, right?
Oh, yeah.
This is where I basically was like, I'm going to use every ounce of energy I have.
It's harder in the arena.
Oh, yeah.
And just street ball.
It is where Kyle just fucked me up.
I just quit for a while.
Oh, Brandon.
All I wanted right here was I wanted to go down there
and I wanted him to check the ball.
Obviously, you can travel.
You can also travel now as well. This is all I want him to check the ball. Obviously, you can travel. You can also travel now as well.
This is all I want.
I want one shot at him and he does this.
That's bullshit.
Oh, that is bullshit.
Hate dog.
Kate got shots up.
Got shots up.
That was close.
My arms were jelly.
All right, wait.
That was the moment.
We got to go back to that moment right there.
So we're playing yak basketball.
There are no rules.
Stephen Chay's playing real basketball.
Yeah, you got caught.
He didn't want to travel.
He literally picked up his dribble, and he's like, well, now I have to pass.
Watch this.
I laughed out loud.
I was like, look.
He's like, oh, fuck.
It trapped me
Now I have to pass
I was like what the hell is he doing
You're calling for it
Yeah that was bullshit
That's when I started just yelling at him
Cause you thought that that was
That was your chance
That was a pure one you were lined up
No defender
Great ball fake Great ball fake.
Great ball fake.
Three straight really close.
How did you make this?
I airballed every one.
To a point where I can't even be mad.
I'm just that bad.
These guys in the second row, they're like, you've got to get us a pizza.
So I was just like, even up.
Not even close.
It was so hard.
I think that ball was heavy.
I would have been fucked if I didn't score.
I was out of breath.
Oh, you can't tell.
It makes it look so funny.
Which Kyle is this?
That's fake Kyle.
He's lefty Kyle.
This is where the hutch is like, come on, bro.
I don't remember this either.
Oh, Brandon, you got out like that?
Yeah, that's how I got out.
JJ gave me the extra ball.
That was collusion in its finest.
Sass has not touched the ball yet.
He moves.
Sass is running up and down.
Keep the action.
I knew I wasn't going to get physical.
I just wanted to get a rebound.
Yeah, look at Sass.
He's just following the action.
He hasn't done anything.
The boy just wants screen time.
Look at him.
He's getting on the block. Yeah, I want a rebound.
He cleared himself out.
Oh, Steven, another rebound.
You had that rebounding position, you just gave it to Steven.
Oh, man, dude, I'm so unathletic.
That's horrible to watch.
Steven's trying to do a fucking head-on run right.
I can't even run right.
This is about when I quit, and I just started.
For the most part, this is like the hardest.
This is me trying as absolute hard as I can.
Steven was actually trying to do basketball moves
on everyone.
What was that, Kate? I don't know.
I just wanted to get off the court.
Yeah, this is where it felt like it was the
longest thing ever.
Is this real, Kyle?
Yeah, I thought it was that.
It's fake, and that's real.
Real Kyle just sw spotted fake Kyle.
From this distance, they do look identical.
All right, wait.
This is where the hot...
That's ass.
Oh, yeah.
Look at this.
What's he going to do?
Wait, why is Kyle running off?
Wait, Kyle, you made one?
Oh, that's Kyle right now.
We should have been on the other end, though.
I didn't realize Kyle got this many shots up.
I guess so.
I know.
That's the point of the game.
Your shots up.
I think he hits this.
No, this is Jay.
Jay makes this.
That's where Nick shot on the hoop.
Oh, Steven. Jay makes this. That's where Nick shot on the hoop.
Oh, Steven.
Another air ball. The problem with this game is that everyone is out of shape,
and they have just stopped playing.
There it is, Steven.
52.
What did you say?
The chips in the dip?
Who is left right now?
Is it Nick and the KBs?
And Sass.
I was physically wheezing.
Like I...
Oh no, KB!
The teams were waiting in the tunnel.
Oh, here comes Sass.
We were like one minute away from the team.
Sass doesn't know.
That doesn't count.
Oh my gosh.
Sass' face. He's going down the corridor.
He's dying. This court. He's dying.
This is a very simple game.
I don't know how Sass could not possibly follow the rules.
Oh, there we go.
Does he go?
Does Nick beat him to it?
Sass gets out.
And then a little extracurricular.
This is for the fans.
Free basketball.
A rundown.
You're going to lay up.
Game is over. Come on, Hutt. So basketball. A rundown. You're going to lay up. Game is over.
Come on, Hut.
So annoying.
Come on, Hut.
The Hut wouldn't even let you have one.
Dude, that was fun.
We should just do it.
We should just offer our services.
Random basketball games.
We'll do high schools.
Just imagine, though, if we could convince like, convince, like, the Knicks
to be like,
yeah, you know, like,
Red Panda and, like,
Quick Change?
Like, we have a
halftime show.
You got a show.
Yeah.
It's just...
Fuck.
It was a fun time.
Yeah.
I'm sorry anyone
had to watch it.
That was awesome.
Yeah.
The whole night
was fucking hilarious.
It went hell of a pitch.
Awesome games, awesome commentary.
From a designer's perspective, the score bug is beautiful.
Good job.
Is that what it's called, a score bug?
Oh.
A score bug?
A score bug.
What is the score bug?
Also, the half.
A little, like what it shows, timeouts.
Oh, wow.
Score.
Half-time shots of, like, the entire company getting out. That was very funny to watch. So funny. Oh, the three-pointed, or the half-court were, I love score. Halftime shots of the entire company getting out.
That was very funny to watch.
So funny.
The three-pointed, or the half court, they were amazing.
Coming out of the woodwork, everybody.
Brandon wouldn't come out, though.
No, I was done.
I was done for the night.
You just had enough?
Brandon was supposed to do a trampoline dunk.
Oh, yeah.
Huh.
We had a trampoline there.
I saw the trampoline.
Did you see the trampoline?
It was like a little exercise trampoline. It was that size. It was a grandmother's trampoline there. I saw the trampoline. Did you see the trampoline? It was like a little exercise trampoline.
It was that size.
It was a grandmother's trampoline.
Apologize to us.
For what?
It was a grandmother's trampoline.
They didn't get an actual trampoline.
You couldn't do it.
They did not get an actual trampoline.
We got one that's like eight inches off the ground.
You said all you needed was a trampoline.
We were right.
You were wrong.
That wasn't a trampoline.
That was a trampoline by definition.
We were right. You were wrong. That wasn't a trampoline. That was a trampoline by definition. We were right,
you were wrong. Also, TJ's lying.
TJ tried to coax me out so he could go out there and he was going to put the scale down and weigh me
in front of God and everybody. That's what he was going to
do. And he was going to say, oh, you can't do it, you're too fat.
TJ gave you the extra
basketball. TJ's a fucking puppet master.
TJ, you had a scale.
What are you talking about, man?
You sound crazy right now.
He gave you the extra basketball.
Why would he not be on your side?
And I thanked him for that.
But I wasn't.
By the time, yeah, by the time second half rolled around,
me and the wife were chilling.
Yeah, you were.
Yeah, we were chilling.
You guys also did a great job at the, what was that, in-between games?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
That was good.
That was interesting.
Although, Nadeau, like, your coach didn't want to talk to us during the second half.
Did he not?
No.
Oh, he was the assistant.
He was the assistant.
Second half, though.
You can't be talking to my guy in the second half.
He's an intense guy.
Right, but every other coach talked to us.
In the first half.
No.
Eh.
Coach K for Toledo talked to us in the second half, but the assistant for Mississippi State
was like, we heard you guys say that we're the worst team in the SEC.
That's what Jeff McBoo said.
Yeah.
Well, the assistant coach is from Philly,
and he's a Rico Bosco.
Before he became a coach, he is Anwar from South Philly,
and he calls into every single radio station in Philly, so this was a big moment for him. I think they were just giving him a shot. Anwar from South Philly, and he calls into every single radio station in Philly, so this
was a big moment for him.
Okay.
I think they were just giving him a shot.
Wow.
Anwar from South Philly?
Yeah.
That's pretty cool.
Is there a place called Germantown?
Yeah, what?
Oh, yeah.
I think that's a famous... He's an assistant coach from...
He's a radio caller that calls every single show.
He is also an assistant basketball coach at Mississippi State University.
I love that.
I think he's a really good caller.
I know.
He's a really smart... I'm not making him that. I think he's like a really good caller. I know. He's like a really smart.
I'm not making him up.
And I think he's existed for like 20 years.
Anwar from Germantown or Anwar from South Philly, I think.
It's Germantown.
It's a prep school.
It's also a neighborhood with beautiful cobblestone streets.
I think there's a Germantown neighborhood.
Good crime.
A lot of crime.
Cobblestone, not good for the wheelchairs.
Yes.
They have like a monorail that runs through town. That's good for the wheelchairs. Mon. They have like a monorail that runs through town.
That's good for the wheelchairs.
Monorail.
Can I shout out a guy?
Yeah.
Shout out a guy.
Jerry fucking dominated them.
Oh, my God.
It was a delight.
Jerry was a delight.
The whole crowd was chanting his name.
I told him beforehand.
I was like, I don't want to make this about anyone else, but I told two people that they
were doing the mop duty.
Jerry was one of them.
You never can figure out the other.
Everyone should be more like Jerry at Barstool because he was like,
yup, I'm in it. He took it very
seriously and it was so
fucking funny. People were applauding every time.
I was bopping around the stadium all night
and every time I was on that side,
every time he went out to do the sweat,
everyone was like, yay. Then on the other side,
every time Rico went out to do it, everyone was like, fuck you. And then on the other side, every time Rico went out to do it,
everyone was like, fuck you.
Everyone was like yelling at him.
Because he didn't put any heart into it.
Oh, no.
About putting heart into it.
Jerry was – do we have a clip of Jerry just wiping up the floor?
Like he almost got run over at one point.
I think he did.
He could have got a technical.
Like if he was on the court.
I thought when the first MVP fell on him, I think.
Yeah.
They also – They just tweeted out numbers.
Barstool Invitational averaged 210K uniques per game.
Wow.
It stacks up very favorable with FS1 and Big Ten Network.
Ooh.
Oh, yeah.
Ooh.
Especially considering the schools it played.
Lightwork.
Yeah.
Lightwork.
Yeah, I kept on seeing a lot of people saying,
this is very entertaining.
Probably wouldn't have watched this if it wasn't Barstool.
Yeah.
Yo!
The blowout game was entertaining.
Oh, because it's over?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was awesome.
The last minute of Mississippi State and Akron was incredible.
It was electric.
And if you watch that, you see what's different about the way you guys produce things.
Yes.
Why do we have numbers for 2021 on that chart?
We didn't have an invitational last year, did we?
No, I think that was just their numbers.
I think that's just the numbers for everybody else.
Their numbers.
We're not on there.
Yeah, I was in the tunnel at the end of that game,
and two Philly security guards were looking at the score,
and they're like, why is everyone freaking out right now?
What is happening?
I was like, it's a gambling.
And I actually thought that we had a chance of the crowd would just make him shoot,
which would have been an all-time gambling. But there was a decent contingent of don't shoots in the
crowd yeah i was probably i was yelling the fuck out of him because you had done
i was screaming stop
winded at the end was saturated after the first fall yeah he's giving a salute. I also just caught out of the corner of my eye during a media timeout.
He was talking to the ref, being like, he got him on the arm.
And the ref was just being like, what are you talking about?
He worked every single ref.
He was up in all their asses.
He did a Jerry Fragrance in the middle of it.
He had them going nuts.
He had a bonus one.
He never got to do his bonus.
He was mopping the... Yeah, look at him.
Yeah.
Oh, fuck. That is the same
look like the soldiers coming up onto the beach
had the night before.
Mop the fuck out of this floor.
As if we had a really bad slip
and it was on him. Oh, we did have one,
but it was under his basket.
Somebody was inbounding the ball.
Oh, yeah.
And they slipped, but I don't think anybody blamed Jerry in the moment.
But it happened.
It wasn't his fault.
He saw everything.
Look.
I need a new mop.
I need a new mop.
You get this guy a new mop?
He's a fucking mop.
He's mopping his ass off.
Oh, God.
There was so many Yak people there, too.
So many.
Which was awesome.
Shout out to Landon.
Yeah, the eight-year-old.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Shout out to eight-year-old Landon.
Might be a clip that I need to get.
You got your tie.
I don't think anyone videotaped it, so it was a private moment between me and him.
You had a pretty big weekend.
Yeah. How about the UFC stuff, too? Oh, yeah.
Halle Berry?
Saw a tweet from someone I follow, and they're like,
is that Big Cat next to Halle Berry?
I saw it organically. I didn't even check
on Twitter, so when I saw you, yeah, I was like,
holy fuck. The fights
were amazing, too. That woman is 56 years old.
Yeah, she is. Very attractive.
She, I think... You should fuck Chris Webby. I think I have some issues, though, because she tweeted this picture, that picture, were amazing that woman is 56 years old yeah she's very attractive she i think you should
fuck chris webby i think i have some issues though because she tweeted this picture that picture
being like caption this and everyone below it was like big cat hit that big cat hit like all
that she deleted the tweet oh that's good that's good i think she's ashamed of our relations true
she's embarrassed yeah you can't hang on to a husband to save her life.
Did you get to chat her up, though?
I did.
I chatted her up a little bit.
I noted that her flashlight was on.
Oh, power.
She's just like us.
Got me right in.
We were talking about one of my bets.
I asked for a picture.
Showed her your Costco card.
Showed her my Costco card.
Who else is it?
Oh, Jared Leto,
all-time weird celebrity
dude who is really good at
talking to you like he
somehow knows you, even though he doesn't. He was just like,
good to see you guys.
You don't know me. You're like, what?
I'm trying to think who else. Miles Teller
was there. Stephen A. Smith
has his phone on his
belt.
On his belt.
He whipped it out.
That's awesome though. Hell yes. They gotta bring that back because that's actually a very convenient
thing to have.
Why don't we do yak ones?
Belt clips?
Belt clips are awesome. I'll start doing it.
Yak berries. We also, Dave and I
after a long weekend we were like
trying to leave before the main event.
And we were walking out, and Dana White just looked at Dave right in the face.
He's like, you aren't leaving, are you?
And we're just like, no.
You went back to your seats?
Went right back to our seats.
Dave Portnoy got bullied into going back to his seat?
I mean, we were sitting front row, so it felt like we probably should stay.
I'm happy we did stay, but I was very tired.
That was an epic fight, right?
That was very good.
That is your move.
You don't stay for the end of any sporting event.
Oh, get out.
You beat the traffic.
Beat the traffic.
You're undefeated against the traffic.
Never let a traffic get me.
I'm trying to think what else.
Meatball Molly obviously wasn't great.
You have to do.
That was a winner, bro.
That fight was nuts.
Nuts. Yeah. She was fighting a robot.
I know that it's like
loser talk to be like I was impressed
with her loss but she didn't
tap out until like
104 strikes
to zero. She was just getting
hammered in the face over and
over again. Crazy.
That ever happen to you Kyle in a fight? Over and over again. Crazy. Did that ever happen to you, Kyle, in a fight?
I don't do fist fights.
I'm saying in a wrestling match.
Did someone ever just absolutely take control of the fight?
Just Logan Stever.
I was pretty good defensively, so I could keep the scores low despite having no shot, but not him.
Tech fall, second period.
Did you know that going into it?
I knew I was going to get teched.
It sucks.
That has to suck.
I would hate that.
Getting choked out is so awesome to watch.
How so?
There really just is something about it.
Primal.
Poirier's whole fight was
outstanding.
It was incredible. There's something about when you know a guy has the other guy's neck and you're likeirier's whole fight was outstanding. It was incredible.
There's something about when you know a guy has the other guy's neck,
and you're like, there's nothing he can do.
It's over.
He's fucked.
Then they just flail around.
Yeah.
I'd never tap.
That's why, yeah.
Pass out?
I'd never tap.
You'd never find me tapping.
I would tap right away.
I would tap immediately, yeah.
I think it would take maybe one second for one of you guys to get me to tap.
Well, let's see.
I wouldn't even get to the point of tapping.
As soon as they made a lunge towards me, I'd tap.
I think I'd pass out.
Getting a knockout before any contact.
Remember that street fight that went viral,
like maybe it was like six months ago,
where the dude tried to tap in a street fight?
No.
This is like, this is a street fight, dude.
I feel like you still should, though.
You should respect it.
Yeah, you should respect it.
What are you going to do, not tap?
Yeah, right.
I would tap.
Yeah.
Get off me.
Respect the fight.
I would definitely tap.
It's better than getting your head caved
in. Choked out.
I feel like that would make the charges against you worse,
right? Like, look, he clearly...
I wonder if that would formulate
in. I bet it would. Yeah, respect
the goddamn tap. We pull up the video of the
Hut. It's my favorite maybe internet video.
Oh, yes. Boston College. Yes, let's do it.
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R-H-O-B-, rhoback.com. What are you going to take away as your best memory
from playing basketball at Boston College?
Probably just, like...
What?
You haven't seen this?
No.
I've never seen this either.
Wait, what is happening?
I love this video.
Last game of the year.
Career's over.
College is over.
You know, he's kind of ashamed of it probably, but I thought this video ruled.
Going out to eat.
With the fellas.
Pure answer, too.
What a pure answer.
I love that.
No, it's awesome.
I would miss that, too. What's his name? H love that. I know, it's awesome. I would miss that, too.
What's his name?
Hutt.
I have his Instagram somewhere.
I tagged him at some point.
Pizza Hutt.
Does he work at Pizza Hutt now?
No.
Because that's what I told everybody.
I don't think.
Everybody was passing it off.
Yeah, people were just like,
you know he works at Pizza Hutt?
Yeah, he's like,
apartment?
That's why I thought that
and I just remembered that
was because you told me that.
Yeah, I told everybody.
That's funny.
What a bastard.
Yeah, dude, he just works at Pizza Hut now.
He said he didn't tell anyone about it, and then his friends were hitting up, and they're like, dude, what the fuck are you doing?
He was like, wait, was this being broadcasted somewhere?
I had no idea.
Everyone's texting me.
So he didn't know about the yak, and they were trying to explain it to him in the green room.
He was like, well, what's the show about?
And they were just like, ah.
And he was like, I don't get it.
And they were like, yeah, they just did not get the show at all.
No.
Nothing to get?
There is nothing to get.
There's literally nothing to get.
Zero learning curve.
Yeah.
It's base level dumb shit.
Yeah.
Dumbest shit possible.
Here he is.
His name is Dennis Clifford. Oh. I wouldn't have shit. Yeah. Dumbest shit possible. Here he is. His name is Dennis Clifford.
Oh.
I wouldn't have guessed.
Anyway.
Hut, hut.
D Cliff 24 if you want to follow him.
I'm sure that will go well, Kate.
Sorry, I don't know.
Maybe that's a mistake.
He just said everyone out.
His address is 124 Smithson Lane.
Sorry.
Yeah, I learned that
it's not necessarily
a favor or a service
to shout people out
on the yak
because some people
don't want like a hundred
barbarian yak fans
commenting on their shit.
I don't know.
I think we should do
one a day.
I asked him before I
No, he's
He's hot.
Is it a light? I'll shout somebody out and everybody can go heckle him. I... No, he's... He's hot. Is it a light?
I'll shout somebody out and everybody can go heckle him.
I'm going to try to think of someone I don't like that much.
You pick one a day.
You pick one a day and they're very confused.
I also told him he could goaltend.
I told him there were no rules.
Everything he did was because of you.
There are no rules.
Not everything, because I told him to face guard you.
If you see someone putting every single ounce of athletic ability they have into something,
and then you just swat the ball away from them last second.
He was also putting his all into the athletic competition.
Yeah, but he's much more naturally athletic than some of them.
He's just trying to compete.
I would really like one of our crazy fans to maybe make a heat map for Sass in that game.
I would like to see that
y'all need our heat one straight line back and forth right in the middle like two dots from his
shots yeah we i would like to see like a full everybody put up the amount of their usage their
usage rate i would have liked to had some time to warm up i mean it seemed like you guys were
warming up all day.
Well, we were there.
Yeah. We were having a good time.
It was such a fun day.
What time did you guys get there?
I was there at like 10 a.m. because they did shoot-arounds.
But the best part about the whole day was like for, I don't know.
An hour?
Like, yeah, an hour or two.
We just had Wells Fargo Center to ourselves.
That's so cool.
No fans were in there, and we were just shooting for an hour.
You hitting those shots in front of the players and them being like,
whoa, that probably felt pretty good.
Jelly Walker, also a fan of Yak basketball.
He's like, what the fuck is that thing you guys are doing online
where you just, you know which place you're shooting?
How do you get the tip and shoot on this rim and then shoot on the other rim?
It doesn't make sense.
This is a Photoshop of that miss I had right there.
Someone Photoshopped it.
Dave video, too.
Should we watch that?
Yeah, that's actually very funny.
That video is crazy.
Evan Durant went after me.
I've never seen a man jump as far forward as Dave does on this.
No, just straight bunny hopping.
Crazy.
Tash, are you flaming him right now?
No, it was a very,
I mean, I have a unique form myself.
We're unorthodox.
That's all it is.
We're breaking the boundaries.
It's going straight forward.
I like how the jacket comes off.
That's got to be the issue.
That was just a flip that he didn't even come close.
Every shot is so short.
There it is.
He's finding it.
Cash.
First try, cash.
First try, cash.
He's jumping for it. basketball is hard as shit yeah it is
oh hand in the face there we go there we. With a hand in the face.
The commentary of the half court shots was great, too.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
The fact that Rico airballed the first three.
It wasn't just airballing.
It was four, I think.
It wasn't just airballing. I mean, airballed him by 15 feet.
And he was like, he came off after he made it.
He's like, I had to get my line right.
What does that mean?
You just got to get your line.
I'm just too short.
If you're not straight on, you can't work that bank shot.
I wanted Jerry to hit his first one so bad.
It would have been such an electric moment.
The arena would have burned to the ground.
Oh, God.
The roof would have blown off like Vesuvius.
Everyone was a Jerry fan.
Brandon, did you take some?
I didn't.
You didn't?
He was off the Delta 8 in the second game, he said.
I was checked out at that point.
I was sitting in the second row behind the Mississippi State bench.
I was fully Mississippi State fan.
Bosco to come.
12th man Bosco.
12th man Bosco.
Some booze.
Bosco.
That was so short.
You can hear the pure joy in Dave's voice.
Holy shit, he stinks.
Bosco's making fun of me.
12th man Bosco. And he goes again. Andco's making fun of me. 12th man, Bosco.
And he goes again.
And another air ball.
And another air ball.
And another air ball.
Oh, baby boy.
I saw a few of those.
Yeah.
No way.
Another air ball.
I almost missed the bus.
They would not let me off the court.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
They didn't have credentials. They would not let me off the court. Oh, yeah, that's right. They didn't have credentials.
They wouldn't let me leave.
They wouldn't let you leave without credentials.
They wouldn't let me leave, yeah.
What was, like, why?
It was so bizarre.
We were all on the bus ready to go, and somebody calls up to Katie,
and they're like, Katie, we can't go.
Kyle's trapped on the court.
And she had to go back in and, like, get you off the court.
That barely worked.
Yeah. That's worked. Yeah.
That's crazy.
We almost lost Kyle.
What were the vibes on the bus ride back?
Was it pretty fun?
Was it raucous?
Yeah, it was jovial.
It was crazy sleepy.
I was out.
How long was the drive back?
Only an hour and a half.
Oh, it's not bad.
It's three hours to get there.
It drives long.
Yeah.
Brutal.
Stayed there.
I don't know why we don't take the train.
I stayed there the night in Philly.
You were walking around the next day, weren't you?
I did.
We had a hotel in Philly down by the Liberty Bell.
And then we woke up, went and had a beautiful brunch.
Did you go for brunch?
Fork.
I used to live above Fork.
Incredible.
I used to live above Third and Market.
I used to smoke weed above there.
I'm not bullshitting you right now.
The brunch I had at Fork is one of the top ten meals of my life.
What?
What did you get?
What was so good about it?
I had steak and eggs, and it was sitting on a sweet potato hash.
Oh.
The steak was perfect.
The hash was perfect.
The egg was perfect.
Oh.
The place is A1.
That place is A1.
It's you, bro.
Wow.
We went to the barstool bar.
How was it?
It was good.
Yeah.
Yeah?
Good times. People down there, huh? Yeah. Samson, did It was good. Yeah. Yeah? Good times.
People down there, huh?
Yeah.
Samson, did you guys cut the line?
Oh, big time.
Please, bro.
Damn, I saw Tico didn't.
Yes, she did.
Surely.
God did.
Sass brought out his comedian friends.
It was sick.
Yeah, we were there for like 10 minutes, though.
Oh.
Well, I left with Roan.
Oh, yay.
Roan said, I don't want to be here anymore i can't be
seen here yeah no people he said too many fans i can't even talk about your text message that
you sent me that night oh my goodness oh no all right i'll explain i'll don't read the message
ron but i'll explain what happened i think you gotta read the message i'll explain. Don't read the message, Ron. But I'll explain what happened. I think you gotta read the message.
I really shouldn't because... It was embarrassing looking back on it. Not really, though.
I was trying to be a good person.
We went back from the bar.
I'm gonna explain it.
We ordered food. I'm explaining it.
You weren't there.
I passed out. That's all I'm saying.
I passed out before my Wawa even got there.
We went back to the hotel.
We ordered food separately.
I went down to get my food, went outside, came back in.
There was a little bit of an altercation happening in the lobby between a girl and this hammered dude.
And the girl was like, I don't know you.
You're very drunk.
And he was like coming on to her just being like, uh.
And I was drunk.
So I just stormed right through and went up to my room.
And then I texted Rowan
and I was like,
I texted Rowan
and I was like,
hey, I was like,
I don't know,
I was like,
because I wasn't thinking
and I was like,
I just saw like,
there's something weird
was going on in the lobby.
I was like,
should we go down
and see if it's okay?
No reply from Rowan.
That was the whole,
that was it.
I passed out immediately.
I didn't know to stay
on the elevator.
You can't try and make me
look bad for that.
Ash, you gotta spin, bro. He was a big guy. Oh, yeah. He wanted to kill both of us. I didn't know to stay on the You can't try and make me look bad for that You got a Batman situation
He was a big guy
He didn't want him to kill both of us
What are you gonna do don't be a hero
That's why I wanted to go get Roan
Get reinforcements
Didn't want to take him myself
But also her friends like she had like a friend
There so I was like yeah they're probably fine
Yeah
Let's look at the police blotter from
Fish and Fish.
Yeah.
Homicide.
You thought that was going to go a lot worse,
didn't it?
You're going to try and flame my ass.
So what did the message say?
Being a good guy. No, don't read the message.
I was drunk. I don't even know
what it said.
You were talking like you just won that.
You forgot about the message.
Roan, I'm so scared right now.
No, Roan said...
I'll tell you what Roan replied.
We need to hear the message.
How many times have we texted since then?
These boys are connected.
Oh, hell yes.
Saturday.
I'll read it. I'll read it.
I'll read it.
I'll read it.
All right.
I don't want you reading it.
I'm going to take this myself.
Okay.
I said, yo, when I went to get my food downstairs.
Saturday, 2.01 a.m.
When I went to get my food just now, there was some random, there was a girl talking
to some random dude in the lobby, and she was like, yeah, I don't know you at all.
You're a stranger danger.
And he was clearly being persistent and coming on to her.
Do you think I should go back down and see if everything is okay or what?
And then I said, kind of just powered through.
And then Room replied at 10 a.m. and said, you got to go check on her?
Could have been a hero, Sass.
I probably should have gone back down.
Where was the hotel staff, I feel like?
It was weird, right?
Right, that's weird.
That hotel has like
the lobby is like the elevator bay
is like you can see
the elevator bay without seeing the front desk.
Okay, so we're all in the same hotel? Yeah. Right down
there downtown? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, that is
interesting. I mean, I don't know. It's just funny to say
to be like, yeah, I saw someone in danger.
You're like, should I do something or are they cool? I don't know. I've never funny to say to be like, yeah, I saw someone in danger. Should I do something or are they cool?
I don't know. I've never had to deal with that before.
Is Roan your moral compass?
Yeah. Yes. My god.
That's bad. Damn.
I thought maybe me and Roan would go down and just tag
team. Roan would flip sides
as soon as you got down.
Why are you talking to my boy like that?
Definitely.
Why aren't you looking up with me?
My firefighter buddy?
It's him.
He had his WWRD bracelet on and he was like, nah, probably nothing.
Let's go to bed.
What would Roan do?
We should, yeah.
We should make those too.
That's the devil on your shoulder.
That's amazing.
There was, like, when I was walking, so I went out to get my food, and then there was, like, a dude and a girl, like, standing out directly outside of the lobby, like, peering in.
And I got kind of pissed because I was, like, trying to get in, and I couldn't because they were standing there.
And then when I went in, I realized, like, oh, they were, like, checking on their friend.
So that's why I was kind of like, they're probably fine.
Like, they're not going to. Yeah, no, I'm sure it's fine. Yeah, now I feel bad. I realized, like, oh, they were, like, checking on their friend. So that's why I was kind of like, they're probably fine. Like, they're not going to.
Yeah, no, I'm sure it's fine.
Yeah, now I feel bad.
I'm sure nothing bad happened.
I should do the Morgan and Morgan read.
Yeah.
Do it.
Mistimed my pisses today.
See you, Big Cap.
All right, Morgan and Morgan.
Yeah.
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All right.
All righty.
Yeah, I guess we could just spin the damn thing.
Oh, I didn't even give you guys my wheel either.
We got to do that too.
Oh, yeah, we do have to do that.
Made one?
Yeah, of course, brother.
I didn't make it this morning.
There we go.
You can make your wheel.
How many slices
I didn't make it this morning
Or ten minutes
Before the show started
Mine's pretty bad
I was trying to think
Of good things to do
But like it's hard
Now I understand
Why we do punishments
Because it's way easier
To come up with punishments
Oh yeah
Good stuff
There's a lot more things
I don't want to do
Yeah
I think that's for everybody
The only thing I could come up with
That I wanted
Was a lobster roll
So number one Is lobster roll four sacks I don't know That sounds great For you? That's for everybody. The only thing I could come up with that I wanted was a lobster roll. So number one is lobster roll for sass.
For you?
Just for you?
Fuck you.
What a piece of shit that is.
Oh, it's too late.
It's already written down.
Lobster roll for sass.
Why don't you add lobster roll for everyone?
No.
All of our food stuff is for everyone.
Next one is sass orders you lunch.
So I'll order someone their lunch.
This first wheel thing was lobster roll for sass.
Yeah.
Why didn't you? It's your wheel. It's my wheel. It's first wheel thing was lobster roll for Sass. Yeah.
It's your wheel.
It's my wheel.
It's your wheel.
You can do whatever you want.
So Sass orders you lunch.
The third one is protest climate change.
Oh.
An example would be glue yourself to the Davey Pageviews painting.
Ooh, I like that.
That's really good.
The one after that is Extra Dry The Cinnamon Challenge
Oh
That's good
People die
Apparently you die
I'll workshop that
I don't think
We'll think of something else
I don't think
Chances are so low
Right
The one after that is
Trampoline Park Yak Basketball
Oh
Now that would be incredible
Yeah that would be fun
One after that is Smoothie Draft Good Ingredients Only Whoa Oh, now that would be incredible. Yeah, that would be fun.
One after that is Smoothie Draft, good ingredients only.
Whoa.
Oh, I like that. I love that.
Yeah.
And then Keto for a week.
Oh, you're still adding?
Yeah, and then, oh, is this enough?
I have one more.
Do everything.
Empty the clip.
The last one is bike everywhere you go for a week.
That's possible.
So, like, obviously, if you have to fly somewhere, don't.
But bike everywhere.
Okay.
That's a wheel.
Everyone does that.
All of yours are about self-improvement.
Yeah, it is, bro.
Oh, yeah.
Self-improvement wheel.
Keto.
Inspiring wheel.
Steven, you weren't here on, was it Friday we did?
Thursday?
Yep.
Your entire wheel is just trying to be friends with us uh yeah no i mean i did like half uh i thought like things and half
uh not enjoyable sushi sake night i fuck with that a lot yeah sushi sake night would be awesome
and all of these are just like no cameras. Hang it out. Sushi Sake Karaoke or no karaoke?
We can leave it up to the night, depending on how it goes.
What's movie popcorn?
We just go get movie popcorn?
Movie popcorn gets delivered.
And TJ, let's add a couple more names to the main wheel,
because I think we just, now that we have all these options,
I like that, you know, it should hit.
Ideally, if it hit once a week, it'd be great.
Should we do four?
Yeah, I think so.
I think you should just make the Lomo Saltado both names.
Or yeah.
We have enough food on the actual wheels.
We might not need it.
Yeah, don't do Lomo Saltado.
Yeah.
No Lomo Saltado?
Well, sorry.
Is it on your wheel?
Never mind.
One of yours.
One Lomo Saltado.
Doesn't one of yours just give you $1,000?
But one of them is you get, and it doesn't have to be one person.
Like, everybody can get together, can pitch in however much, but I just need that fucking
thousand.
Yeah.
I need my rack.
I like this.
This looks good.
It's smart.
I want lobster roll.
I hope I get lobster roll.
It's going to be dry today.
Yeah, I see.
That would blow.
I think so, too.
I think you're right. Oh, motherfucker. That would blow. I think so, too.
I think you're right.
Oh, motherfucker.
You're right.
Should have added more names.
Well, we're running out of dry, so we'll get it this week.
By the way, Thursday we're doing World Cup, right?
Thursday and Friday.
Oh, fuck.
I'm out.
Both days?
Friday, yes.
God damn it. Are you really? I'm out next week. I thought we were doing Thursday, Friday, World Cup fuck. I'm out. Both days? Friday, yes. God damn it.
Are you really?
I'm out next week.
I thought we were doing Thursday, Friday.
Bro.
Going home.
I thought we were doing it Thursday.
I'm out next week.
What about tomorrow?
Can we do it tomorrow?
I'm out.
We're out.
We're going to Maxion.
What about Wednesday?
Wednesday?
Maxion.
We'll pick.
We're going to use.
Can we do it right now?
Let's do it right now.
Let's do it right now.
Let's pick our teams at least.
Oh.
Yeah, I bought a bunch of ping pong balls that are coming that we're going to- Oh, he has to draw the flags.
Nick was going to draw the flags on them.
I was, yeah.
Make them cool.
Can we just do it with a regular ping pong machine and just do it with numbers?
Yeah, and I'll-
When does it start?
I'll still draw on the ping pong balls.
It doesn't start until Sunday.
Let's do it right now.
We are all here right now, and this seems like the only time all week we're all going to be here.
That was an emergency.
I could tell.
Can we go tragedy cam?
Oh, God.
Tragedy cam.
It's that damn dog again.
He got out.
All right, I'm fine with that.
I have to step out for ten minutes at two o'clock.
I can bring the ping pong ball machine back with me.
No, I'll get it after.
I'll bring it back with me.
So how do we want to do it?
You could also do it on Thursday, Friday without me.
I could have a surrogate.
I don't need to be here.
I don't mind having a surrogate.
We need to be here.
We can do it.
I'm glad I'm having a surrogate.
You've never been here.
You've never seen me when you're not around.
I don't ever see you when I'm not here.
I am grumpy.
He's a mess.
Really?
Yeah.
He's a real tough chick.
Is that true?
Yeah.
I would hate that.
So, TJ, how are we going to do this then?
There's, what, 32 countries?
So you could just do three.
Yeah.
I'll just assign numbers 1 through 32 to each country.
We have more than thirty two
balls in there.
That's a drink. Let's go get the Henny.
Why don't we just use a wheel? We could just
use the wheel. That works.
Or we could go
one through three is like
this country. Two through
a while though because then we like double up.
Just use the wheel.
I like the wheel for this.
What did we decide? It was going to be
three, but then there was going to be
four, too. I thought we were taking the
two worst teams. I thought we were talking about Cutter and somebody
else off. Oh, yeah, you're right.
Do you want to do that, or do you just want to do if they stay
on the wheel, they stay on the wheel?
There's two bonus
ones. Then two people will get bonuses.
I'd say the last two countries
just aren't in play.
I think...
Yeah, but if the last two
countries don't want...
We want...
It would suck if it was
Argentina and Brazil
and they went to the final.
Let's just take off Qatar
and what's another bad country?
Iran?
Senegal.
Let's see what the worst...
No, Senegal might win.
It's grouped, dude.
Then who's worse?
Brandon said Iran.
And what's the punishment?
All right, so here's what we're going to do.
So Friday we're going to have World Cup Day,
where I guess Brandon and Ron will be out,
but everyone's bringing a drink and a food of their country.
Maybe I'll have to get back in.
Yeah, come back in.
That's Friday?
Friday.
I was going to look it in California. Maybe I can fly back on Thursday night from California. It's'll have to get back in. Yeah, come back in. That's Friday? Friday. I'm just going to...
Maybe I can fly back on Thursday night from California.
It's going to be a fun day.
I know.
I'm going to be in Los Angeles recording with Mr. Beverly.
Yeah, but it's going to be a fun day, bro.
Why don't you tell Pat to get his ass out here for once?
I would like to, but that's not conducive to an NBA schedule.
Could you?
I'll talk to him.
Your dull face.
I'm looking at the odds right now.
Cutter. an NBA schedule, could you? I'll talk to him. Your dull face. I'm looking at the odds right now. Qatar and I'm just going to pick the bottom two.
Oh, no.
Tunisia and Saudi Arabia are the lowest odds.
Odds.
Okay.
All right.
Get them out of there.
And so Qatar's back in.
Qatar's back in.
Nice.
You don't want to keep Saudi in there for that sweet oil money just in case?
No, no, no. Let's make a political statement right now. One of us don't want to keep Saudi in there for that sweet oil money, just in case? No, no, no.
Let's make a political statement right now.
One of us might impress the kingdom.
Saudi's out.
One of us impresses the kingdom.
For what they've done.
That's where I'm going to Thanksgiving next week.
Oh, no.
It's going to be an awkward conversation over turkey.
So, I think what we...
That was good, Ryan.
What do we decide who wins if the person...
It's money.
It's money.
We're putting all money in there.
That was most goals, but I'm down to put money in.
No, it wasn't money.
We're putting in $100.
You're putting in $1,000.
Yeah, but I...
We're putting in $1,000?
No, it's win the whole thing.
We're putting in $1,000 and you're matching or something like that.
Let's all put $1,000.
We're all putting in $100, and then you're the tenth,
so you also put in a hundred.
I'll put in 1,100, so it'll be 2K.
A thousand, yeah, yeah.
So that is for the winner of the World Cup.
Yes.
Should least goals have to go to one of those countries?
Yes.
What about everybody gets their loser country?
We spin at the end, everybody gets their loser country.
I like that.
We'll find that out first.
Are we writing this down?
I'll write it down.
I don't understand what you're saying.
We have a country wheel, and let's say Sass lands on Canada.
If Sass gets the least goals, he has to go to Canada at some point next year.
I'm going to Canada in March.
To fly there, for example.
Fucking idiot, damn it.
So how does this game work again?
Yeah, we gotta rewrite the rules. That's scary.
Oh, the winning team
gets you the money.
I'll do it. Least goals gets you a trip
to Tunisia. You have to pay for it.
Oh, we'll make it into content
because it's already bad enough.
Yeah, true.
It's just a one-way ticket back and there and back.
You could do that or you could do a video there.
You could do a video.
Or you can get an up-and-coming rapper from that country
and collab with them on a song that you produced.
Do that as well.
Right, Kyle.
Absolutely do that.
That's on my table too.
Option two.
I like that a lot.
If you don't want to expedite a passport,
all that jazz,
you can collab on a rap song with one of their up-and-coming artists. Option two. I like that a lot. If you don't want to expedite a passport, all that jazz. That's a great call.
You can collab on a rap song with one of their up-and-coming artists. Yes.
If I lose, you want to go make a video in one of these countries?
Yeah.
Can you confirm how we get down to the losing countries?
Is it one of each of ours or all of our countries?
We should, before any country is eliminated, we all get assigned a losing country right now.
Yeah, on your team.
Before we even get our countries.
Oh, no.
I think it has to be one of your three. Ask me what the worst one you've got, or you have to designate it. Yeah, on your team. Before we even get our countries. Oh, no, I think it has to be one of your three.
Ask me what the worst one you've got, or you have to designate it.
No, no.
All right, so we all pick.
We do the wheel for all of us getting three countries.
After the wheel's done and we all have our three countries,
then you have a three spin of which country you would have to go to if you lose.
Yes.
Of those three.
Yeah.
Very fun.
Yeah, very fun.
And I know this is a big promise, but I vow.
I vow as well.
I vow I will go to the country.
I would say.
I was looking at you to vow, not to say wow.
Yeah, no, I'll go.
And let's put a hard date on it.
In 2023.
2023, okay.
I'm going to say it's got to be faster.
By summer?
I'm going to say by. July 1st. By Memorial Day. By, okay. I'm going to say it's got to be faster. By summer? I'm going to say by...
July 1st.
By Memorial Day.
By Memorial Day.
Okay.
Okay?
Yeah.
How long does it take to get a passport?
You can expedite it pretty quick.
You can get a passport before...
Seven months.
Yeah, before that.
Memorial Day.
Okay.
Wow, this is exciting.
What if it's winter in the country?
It's warm.
I don't know. What if Giselle has a new boyfriend? Wait a exciting. What if it's winter in the country? It's warm. I don't know.
What if Giselle has a new boyfriend?
Wait a minute, what?
What if it's winter?
Well, then you don't have to go.
What if it's summer?
Yeah, I mean, that's the hope.
Just go in summer.
It's not supposed to be like a vacation.
Hey, do you think winter sucks?
What if it's winter?
I'm going to go to Saudi Arabia in the winter.
Back accordingly, dude.
I don't know what countries are in this.
So I...
Is someone in like Australia?
I don't know.
I don't know if Australia...
Are they in it?
I don't think so.
That would be cool.
Japan's in it.
But they're up in our side of the...
There's a lot of lovely countries in it.
Some others.
Are there exemptions for like...
There are no exemptions.
No.
No exemptions.
No exemptions.
You could spend the rest of your life in an Iranian prison.
All right.
So TJ, first spin a name wheel for our order.
So it's fair.
It'll be snake draft.
Just to confirm what countries are staying off this.
This is going to turn me into a mega fan of the World Cup.
This is very exciting, yeah.
Tell me if this makes sense.
There's three wheels.
The shittiest teams, the medium teams, and the top teams,
and we each get one of each. Oh, I don't hate that. No, because I think somebody should be able The shittiest teams, the medium teams, and the top teams. And we each get one of each.
Oh, I don't hate that.
I don't know because I think
somebody should be able
to get three great teams.
And somebody should be able
to get three shittiest.
Tunisia and Saudi Arabia are off.
Okay.
Those are probably,
I wouldn't want to go to Tunisia,
I don't think.
Let alone in the winter.
Right.
Only not.
Imagine Tunisia in the winter.
Forget it.
Tunisia was a good album
by Charlie Parker. Are we getting a Brittany Griner
Exemption for Russia
Russia's not in it
Russia's also not in it
This might be the least I've ever seen
You know about a subject
You're so rattled
Just look at a list of the countries
Stephen doesn't have to go
Because it might be winter in one of his countries. Okay, so... Steven doesn't have to go because it might be a winner in one of his countries.
Wait, so...
Oh, wow.
Wow, so many questions.
All right, so first
we got to spin for order.
Again, I have to step out
for 10 minutes.
We have to do one question
with a quarterback
at 2 o'clock.
It will literally take 10 minutes.
Can you say which quarterback?
Matt Ryan.
Cool.
I'm going to ask him about it.
Why don't you just do
your three first then?
No, no, no,
because that's not fair.
That's true. It should be done in order. Like, we're going to ask him about his run. Why don't you just do your three first then? No, no, no, because that's not fair. That's true.
It should be done in order.
Like, we're going to do the order, and I also want to see it.
You guys can yak for 10 minutes, then we'll do it.
That's okay.
Let's get our order.
You go do that.
Yeah, yeah, right.
Perfect.
All right, so this is the order.
So this is what order you'll be getting a spin on, right?
Yeah.
And it's just straight order snake draft.
So it's like if TJ gets the first pick, then he has the whatever it is,
the 20th pick.
Isn't that making it needlessly complicated?
Like it's a random wheel, so snake draft doesn't matter.
The more countries left on there.
It's all random, though.
It's all random.
You're not actually picking, so snake draft wouldn't help.
Snake drafts are fun.
Okay, fair enough.
Because then you get two in a row if you're the last.
Got it.
Yeah.
All right.
That's fun.
Or if it's not good, if there's a shithole.
Fair enough.
It's snake.
Snake drafts are always fun.
Yeah.
It's always the way you draft.
Okay.
If you're picking something.
NFL draft.
We're not drafting.
We're getting assigned.
Would you please?
Sorry.
Alright, here we go. Draft order.
We are so good at overcomplaining.
There we go.
Sass gets the first one off the board.
This is a weak class.
I'm glad.
Congrats, bro. That's sick, Sass.
You're so fucked.
Steven, write this down.
You're a sneaky good drafter.
Roan, too.
Oh, boy.
You guys should get a fucking room.
I'm hoping I'm getting, like, the seventh pick.
That feels right.
I'm going to be getting a room out in Saudi Arabia.
Hey-oh.
Bundle up.
Can I change that?
No.
Okay. We've got Bundle up. No, Brandon was kind of right that it's all random, so it's kind of stupid.
I'm never going to pass up on that.
I know we're doing the wheel, but a country's draft would have been fun if we did pick our country.
That's because you just got the second pick.
I don't have the second pick.
You don't?
Country's draft would be fun.
No, no, no.
This is truly wheel justice.
And on Friday, yeah, everyone come with a food and a drink
and maybe a little presentation of their country.
Yes.
A World Cup day to kick off opening ceremonies.
It's one of the countries.
You can do all three.
Presentation of all three.
No, actually, that's what it is.
Yeah, food, drink, presentation covering all three. Presentation of all three. No, actually, that's what it is. Yeah, food, drink, presentation covering all three.
What about fuck, marry, kill for each of you?
Yeah.
Just bring, yeah, something from every,
one of those covers every single one.
You got this, Steven?
You writing this down?
All right, here we go.
Nope.
Nope.
All right, duh.
Duh.
I'm not well-traveled, nor do I know what countries are in this.
I'm going to say right now that if I get a country far away,
I will just be buying a first-class ticket going there and just coming back.
It could be like $40,000.
That is such a punishment, though, to have to fly and then turn around and fly back.
If it's like a 15-hour trip, you're just going to get out and come right back?
Yeah.
30 straight hours on a plane?
Yeah.
I forget how big the world is.
I regret being so adamant.
Yeah.
No, this is a real punishment.
Also, a lot of these places is not a direct flight.
No.
Wait, what?
What?
Fucking Tunisia.
Yeah.
Okay, that's...
I didn't know that.
It's like a 20-hour flight like South Africa You're gonna be in a
helicopter flying from like fucking
I don't even know
On a charter boat
You might get your dream of back to back picks
I might get my back to back picks
All I want is back to back picks
That's how you would base your draft
I'm gonna take like a boat to Saudi Arabia
I got back to back-to-back picks. That's how you would base your draft. Having to take a boat to Saudi Arabia.
I got back-to-back picks. Back-to-back picks.
But that means I also have the last, very last pick in the entire thing.
That's right.
It's not a pick.
It's just random.
It's not a pick.
I'm going to do one question with the quarterback,
and then we'll do all the country.
We're not doing anything.
We're yakking until you get back.
Is that okay?
That's fine.
There's another ad, too.
I feel like Iran, if you flew there and left immediately, would be like, what's up with that? What did they do? What does that okay? That's fine. All right, there's another ad, too. I feel like Iran, if you flew there and left immediately, would be like, what's up with that?
Yeah, wait, what did they do?
What does that mean?
They'd have a hard time letting you back in.
Yeah, I feel like that would raise flags on their end.
I just decided I didn't.
No, it's not for me.
Yeah.
I clicked the wrong button.
Yeah.
I thought I was going to fucking Detroit.
Yeah, I hate it.
Wait, this is't LA, right?
I didn't realize it was winter here.
I'm going to have to.
I packed wrong.
I got to go back.
I'll be right back.
This is the worst punishment.
It would be kind of interesting.
It would be fun, and you'd be forced to make something out of it.
I'm going to predict something.
No one's going to go anywhere.
Uh-huh.
I'm going to go with that. I vowed. I'm going to predict that. I one's going to go anywhere. Uh-huh. I'm going to go with that.
I'll go. I'll go too.
I'll go.
You didn't jump on the trampoline when the trampoline
was in the building. It wasn't a trampoline.
It was that high off the ground.
It was that high off the ground. You could have just said,
I'm doing it and jumped off of it.
It was this big.
Swaziland, yeah, maybe.
It wasn't an actual trampoline.
I mean, if we got like a first class flight on one of those like A380 like Emirates flights.
Yeah.
They don't have those.
Double decker with the bar.
That would be awesome.
That doesn't exist to a lot of these places.
You would just have a whole room to yourself.
And plus that's literally $40,000.
Yeah, they are. There's nowhere that you're
getting a first class ticket
for. If it was Coach,
I would kill myself.
I mean,
I could not imagine. The longest
flight I've ever had is five hours. Or I guess
like... You flew to LA, right?
Yeah, like six, seven.
Yeah. How long is that flight?
Six hours?
No, to like Saudi Arabia.
I don't even know.
That's off the table.
17 hours to Dubai.
Can we look at the list of countries in this?
I'm trying to think of the word.
Like Ghana's in it.
Nick, you can do like a...
Like some of these European ones.
Ghana video with what's his name?
Who?
A lot of these are...
Your boy.
Boxer.
Yes.
Most of these are fine. I would love to get Who? A lot of these are. Your boy. Boxer. Yes. Most of these are fine.
I would love to get Belgium.
Almost all of them are dope as hell.
Morocco would be incredible.
All these are great.
I've heard it's a little overrated.
Maybe not Senegal.
But what teams are actually going to win?
It doesn't matter what teams are going to win.
It doesn't matter what team loses.
The thing is, all the group of threes leased goals.
Right.
Leased goals out of.
Oh, okay.
It's not the team.
It's your, yeah. It's your, yeah.
It's your group of goals.
Then you have a pick of which one you're going to go to.
It's going to make the World Cup fun.
All these look great.
Most of these are good tourist attractions.
Senegal, no.
Cameroon, no.
Ghana, no.
What are the odds of it being one of those?
So the bottom 10 on this list in terms of odds to win it all,
which might not tell you much about goals scored, but
Wales, South Korea, Cameroon,
Ghana, Qatar, Australia,
Costa Rica, Iran.
Australia is on it? Yep.
Oh. So someone
could be going to Australia. In the winter?
I don't...
If you lose... It's the opposite
season down there.
I'm making fun of you. It's the opposite season down there.
I'm making fun of you.
There's no way they experience winters.
That's right.
Yes, they do.
Australia?
It gets chilly, doesn't it? Not down where you go in Australia.
If you lose, do you get to pick which of the three countries?
I would say the farther south.
Sydney doesn't really have a winter.
I wouldn't say.
You've got to go to Adelaide, though.
If it's winter, you're going to have to grow out your bush.
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Play that in your meetings.
52 seconds.
Sorry, Nick.
Oh, I've been fired.
I will say, ladies also love clean balls.
Yes.
They like a clean guy who takes care of himself with Manscaped.
That's right.
It's appreciated.
It's appreciated.
She will say that.
Like a tip of the cap to us.
She will definitely say that. Like a tip of the cap to us. She will definitely say that.
That's true.
So just refresh.
It's the three countries of the least score, they go on a wheel,
or you pick from those three countries?
They all have three countries.
Yeah.
And if you're – we're all going to have an aggregate score.
If your three combine to have the least goals,
then you go to the country
that we will select today.
Right.
Oh, we pick it today.
We're picking our rooting interest.
We're going to get all of our groups of three in a minute.
What if you get a good-ass country?
You'd be rooting for your team to not do well.
Yeah.
Right.
I would rather just go on my own accord.
Oh, yeah, right.
You're going to know today who might be in the mix,
because if you get England, Brazil, and Argentina,
you're not going to be in the mix for this,
because you're going to score a lot of goals.
Right.
This is...
If you get three bad teams here, you're going to be fucked.
Are we taking a combined score of three teams?
If you have bad teams, that's probably not great.
All three teams...
Oh, because some of the bad teams...
They added up a combined amount of goals they have in this tournament.
Okay, I thought we were just doing the individual.
If your three teams combine for nine goals in this tournament.
I don't think this is the most confusing thing we've done.
This is not that confusing.
I got it.
I'm from Mississippi.
That's right.
But that's fucked up to say about people from the south to assume that you're dumb.
Wait, you play both sides of the coin.
You can't do smart and dumb.
I can, and I will.
Okay.
Yes, you can.
Is it the goals
through the entire tournament, or is it the goals
through the qualifier? I think the entire
tournament.
I thought me and you had a kinship.
What if there's a tie? Are we adding up
the preseason goals?
Add that into it? Yeah, that's a factor.
That should play a factor.
Steven, are you ready to make the trip if need be?
Yeah.
Do you have a passport?
I do.
You could also do the collaboration.
What do you know about some of these countries?
Nothing.
How many countries have you been to, Steven?
A lot of countries on there.
Maybe like half a dozen.
What?
You've been to half a dozen countries?
Probably.
Canada, Mexico.
I mean, six is something
you can know.
France.
Love.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
It's all probably the most.
And I don't know.
It's Puerto Rico.
How many have you got?
Yeah, so more than half a dozen.
I don't know.
Done a lot of random layovers.
How many have you got?
Oh, Kate probably has a lot, yeah.
But not to enjoy.
It's like bopping through.
Not for pleasure.
Kyrgyzstan, Bulgaria, Germany.
That's flexes.
Bulgaria.
I can think of
about 15 right off the top of my head.
Whoa.
So Canada.
I got 22.
Mexico.
You got 22 countries?
I got two.
Okay.
I got two too.
I've never even been to Canada
or Mexico.
I've seen Canada, but I haven't. Have you? I've seen it too. I've never been. Never Canada Or Mexico I've seen Canada
I've seen it too, I've never been
You look south from Detroit, you're just looking at it
Cross a river there
When we choose our countries
Can we order t-shirts or something
For Friday
We have to get some
Yeah, probably full kit
Full kit Fridays
My favorite American girl Might be too late to get some Giga. Will they have full kit? Century merch? Yeah, probably full kit. Full kit Fridays?
Kittredge.
My favorite American girl.
Might be too late to get kits.
We're going to have to start waking up at like 5 a.m.
I had a crush on
those American girls.
I think I got 16.
American girl dolls?
Like a little boy.
I was obsessed with them.
The dolls are the characters.
I had like an emotional
desire to be with them.
Felicity.
It wasn't even sexual?
No, it wasn't sexual.
I had a romantic...
That was my first time feeling romantic interest in a different person or thing.
The doll or the character?
The doll.
They looked realistic.
Yeah.
Dressed cute.
Which one did you like?
What do you mean realistic?
Felicity was like
the cool one they were six inches tall ever watch the movies yeah yeah yeah that is weird
the first time i ever had a romantic interest was uh there was a poster in target of a girl
okay i just that's where you lost i was like, and I just stood there staring at it for like an hour.
And you were... While my mom was like shopping around.
Yeah.
Damn, you got to find a...
That is realistic.
Holy fuck.
Yeah.
It's not even funny.
I was feeling her, yeah.
That was my first time facing the debilitating crisis of loving someone that you will never have the chance of being with.
Did it hurt to look at just now?
I got to spend so much time with her that I was in denial.
That I had no chance.
Did you have one of the dolls?
My sister had all of them.
Oh, okay.
That's the one?
So, life like...
This is a dumb question, but like...
And if you tip them upside down...
Maybe it was Kit.
Kit was the blonde.
Titridge was the...
I think she was a brunette as well.
Felicity looked different than...
Felicity Black?
No, no.
There was a Native American.
Anastasia?
Scary.
Her name was Scary?
Scary Spice.
Scary Spice.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
I did like her, yeah.
You liked Kit?
Quite a bit.
I think you're telling...
Yeah, no, I am.
I love that.
No, I feel that.
I think that that's probably relatable
for some young fellas out there.
For sure.
Do you remember yours?
Like the first...
Not like...
The sexual awakening.
I remember the first time I felt something in my loins.
It was a Britney Spears gut milk poster.
Oh, no, not even the poster, but it was eight and a half by 11.
And they were giving them out at Kroger.
And you could get it.
And I put it up to the window to see if I could see her nipples, like, through the light.
I could just see the other side of the fucking poster.
I remember Britney Spears kissed Christina Aguilera
at an awards show
and I thought
that was right when I was realizing
I think they both kissed Madonna, right?
what gay is, and I was pretending to be disgusted
in front of my friends
and I got clowned
it's not
it's whack, yeah, it is gay
that's apparently sexual
I don't know It's not It's whack Yeah it is gay That's apparently sexual Mine was
I don't know
Yeah mine was actually
Probably the
Hit me baby
Music video
Because I had it on
Singstar
I was like
This is crazy
Wait this might be
Embarrassing for me
What year was that
Professor
Assassin
I was in
Second grade
Oh boy
Yeah
You might have been
Like a senior in high school.
Girls?
2000.
Okay, that's fine.
Okay.
Eight.
Mine was Mariah Carey.
Okay.
Yours was Mariah Carey?
Mariah Carey.
Particular image?
Particular thing?
Yeah, the cover of her
second album, Mariah Carey. Okay. Let's go to that. I don't know what the question is. Maybe not the cover of her second album, Where I Carry.
Let's go to that.
I don't know what the question is. Maybe not the cover,
but it's like sexual awakening.
The first, yeah.
Mine was a baby doll.
Mine was Baywatch.
The rainbow one or the butterfly?
I think it wasn't,
no, it was a cover of Emotions,
whichever one that was, and whatever, it wasn't. It wasn't. No, it was a cover of Emotions, whichever one that was.
And whatever.
It's not.
The face shot?
When I was 12 years old, I thought in 1991, I thought Mariah Carey was the most beautiful
person that ever existed.
Did you tell your mama?
Oh, yeah.
She bought me posters.
Aw.
She brought home a TV guy with a Mariah Carey cutout poster in it.
I think mine was either, it was Pamela Anderson, Baywatch, but also Sable.
Oh.
Sable, really?
Well, Sable's the one that really let it loose, right?
Yeah, wrestling, like, when you're watching wrestling.
Not Sonny, though?
No.
I like Sonny better than Sable.
And I, can I say this?
But there was definitely a time when I was like,
China's interesting.
Wrestlerly?
yeah China I'll just say it that way
China was definitely interesting
to like a 12 year old me
you killed Che with that
what's going on
yeah
R.I.P.
yeah I mean cause I
I don't know if it was
it wasn't the same feeling
I had for Pamela Anderson
but it was cool
what is the
I don't know
what is China
what is her story
well she's passed, unfortunately.
She was jacked.
So Chyna was like a bodybuilder.
Had a strong jaw.
Like in a year, she got
a good job.
See, that's interesting.
That's not surprising. Big Head, we looked at your
Explore page. It was all girls
that looked like that. Yeah, yeah. That's true.
Jacked girls. Jacked with big tits
Yeah
We gotta wheel this thing
No that was
China was interesting for me
It was like a curiosity
Don't get you thinking
Okay
Don't get you thinking
Do I?
Am I?
Yeah okay
I think I am
This is fun
Yeah
It's so loud
It's cool
Did she do Playboy?
Oh yeah
She did porno
She did way better than that
She went first and China was next, I think.
Comparing China to Felicity.
Everybody's different.
Yeah, everyone finds their way differently.
Yeah, all right.
We can spin.
Thank you guys for giving me a 10-minute.
It was very fast.
How'd it go?
It was good.
It was one question for the quarterback, so we only get one question.
Is he winded from that run?
That's what I asked.
Oh, shit.
Sorry.
He was like, yeah, well, yeah, tune into PMT. Yeah, give up the one question. Yeah, yeah. I only have one question. Is he winded from that run? That's what I asked. Oh shit, sorry. He was like, yeah, well yeah, tune into PMT.
Yeah, give up the one question.
Yeah, yeah, I only have one question. I was about to say it.
I'm bad.
Okay, so who's
up first? This is actually nerve
wracking. Yeah. This is a
significant wheel.
And I'm gonna...
I'm rooting for it. I'm actually gonna say
it's three grand for the winner.
Wow.
Okay, so that equals out with the punishment then.
Yeah.
We have to perform the national anthem.
We want to get the kits.
Very quick.
Yeah.
If one of your teams wins the World Cup, you win the money.
If your three teams have the lowest amount of goals combined,
you're flying to one of these countries.
And we're running out of that country today.
Yes. What should the tie to determine that country today. Yes.
What should the tiebreaker be?
Shorter.
The wheel.
Shortest team.
What about preseason goals?
Wheel.
Shorter team?
There's no preseason goals.
I like that.
Average height of the team?
Or country's total population combined.
Oh.
Or it can just be like the least points given up.
No, no, no.
I kind of like the short height of the team.
The height of the team.
It might be hard to calculate.
Oh, it's not?
They're all listed.
They're all listed.
Yeah.
Okay.
So all three of your teams combined height?
No, it's just the one.
It's just the one.
Just the one.
One team.
We're going to have one team we have to go to,
even if they weren't the worst performance.
It's like if you get Japan, you're...
Oh, you don't know. You really
don't know. We're choosing our team
once we get our three.
We're choosing or we're wheeling. Heights happen
to tie.
Yeah. No, he's right. I think you just both go.
Yes.
We're taking both.
Yeah, yeah. If it's a tie, you both go.
Of the two teams that we select on
the wheel.
We're talking this is down the road.
Jay is really struggling today.
All right.
What if it's winter?
You don't know where they sit above the equator or below.
We're going to be living in the winter.
What is it?
We can go somewhere in the winter, surely.
All right, Sass' first team.
It's been that thing.
I want bad teams. I want to go somewhere.
U.S.
Sass, you have to learn the national anthem of this team.
Switzerland. Oh, hell yeah.
That would be a team.
That would be awesome.
Oh, I think they don't score goals, right?
Zah, chime in at any point.
Switzerland. Yeah, no, they stink.
That's all success. This is going, chime in at any point. Switzerland. Yeah, no, they stink. Okay.
Oh, yeah.
That's all a success.
This is going to be good.
I would love Switzerland.
Steven, you writing?
Mountains.
Good-ass hiking in Switzerland.
Oh, yeah.
Elite.
Does it look like the wheel's moving to anyone else?
It's like an optical illusion.
It's working with my eyes.
All right, it's me.
It's been a little bit for me.
What's the music?
I think this is...
This one's for Africa.
Eljo.
Oh, Denmark.
Good or bad, Zaha?
They're good.
They're pretty good.
They're not that good.
Okay.
I'm going to pull up the odds so that we can do a live odds.
Let me just tweet out...
This is one of my 16.
I'm 33 to 1.
No shit.
33 to 1.
All right.
Who's third?
This actually feels like we're in the game menu of the World Cup.
I feel like Cameroon was on the Nintendo soccer game.
Maybe.
This one's for Africa.
Wales.
That's the top of England, isn't it?
Plus 20,000.
That's going up against the U.S.
There's some good teams on the board, boys.
Does Bale play for Wales?
There's Wales.
There you go.
Fucking Wales.
Oh, wow.
This beat is awesome.
Who's this?
Kate.
Kate.
Here we go.
Let's go.
Oh, Japan.
Oh, I like that.
Japan is 200 to 1.
Wow, so they're good.
Is that good?
That's good.
That's bad.
That's very bad.
If you want to...
Depends on what you want.
I want to go to a country and I want to win the money.
I want to lose.
Wait, if you get the money, you could go to any of these countries.
No, not for $3,000.
You're not going to Japan.
All right, who's next?
$3,000.
Oh, wait, they're actually worse than 200 to 1. I read that000. Oh, wait. They're actually worse than $200 to $1.
I read that wrong.
Well, that's good for me then, right?
It's been in for Zaha.
I think these have-
$2,000 to $1.
Oh, that's good.
I want to travel.
Here we go.
$3,000 to $1.
No.
Zaha.
Oh.
Mexico.
Mexico.
Hey.
Here you go, Zaha.
They're pretty good, though.
They're pretty good.
Here you go, Zaha.
El Tri.
No, is El Tri?
Who's up?
Brandon.
Brandon.
Brandon.
Show me something good.
Oh, goodness.
Senegal, Senegal, Senegal, Senegal.
Oh.
Morocco.
Morocco.
So close to the U. Morocco.
So close to the U.S.
This is fun.
E, then Big Cat twice.
Yep, I go twice.
Now it's me and then Jay. Oh, fuck.
Oh, what the fuck?
I got a lot of spinning to do.
We got so pumped.
Who's this?
DJ going to Poland.
DJ, Poland.
Poland.
There have been no good teams taken.
That could be fun.
All the good teams are still there.
A little close to the floor.
What's Mexico like?
Are they not?
Mexico's pretty decent.
You just need at least one good team to not have the lowest amount of goals.
Who's up?
Jay.
Jay, let's go, Jay.
Way to be, Jay.
Mexico's not terrible. Che, let's go, Che. Way to be, Che. Mexico's not terrible.
Oh.
Spain's good.
That's nice.
All the good teams are right there in the row.
Yeah.
Oh, shit.
They're in the tricky group.
You could just become a force with that back-to-back.
They're going to definitely score goals, though.
Yeah, Spain is good.
Again, we're playing for money, too.
Spain is the fourth favorite
Wow
That's a big one
Who is that for?
This is for Nick
Who are the top three favorites?
Brazil, Argentina, France
Spain, England, Germany
For the top teams?
Oh
Whoa, Nick
That's a great one to go to.
All right.
Long flight.
Yeah, I think you'd do great down there.
All right, so I get two in a row.
Oh, my God.
Australia.
This is so nerve-wracking.
Two in a row.
I better not blow this.
This could make or break the whole thing for me.
I get two bad ones in a row.
Oh, no, this is a bad one.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
He's gone. Oh, no. Gone a good bad one. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, no. He's a Ghana.
Oh, no.
Ghana good?
I don't think so.
Tell me Ghana's good.
It could be.
The group that they're in is wrong.
They're a good team, but they're with South Korea and Portugal.
Can they score?
And Uruguay.
Can they score?
Plus 40,000.
Uruguay.
Can they score?
That's a group of death if you ask me.
I don't want two in a row.
I don't want two in a row. Another one, PJ. I don't want. The group is tough. That's a group of death, if you ask me. I don't want two in a row. I don't want two in a row.
Another one, TJ.
I don't want two in a row.
No.
Stop.
Oh, this is big.
Belgium.
Belgium's huge.
Yes.
Okay.
Is Belgium good?
Yes.
Belgium's very good.
They're good, and it's easy to go to.
I think Belgium.
A wheel of three is deciding, right?
Belgium, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
They might carry you by themselves.
Ninth.
Yeah, they're a big goal-scoring team.
All right, is it me?
Nick.
Nick.
Snake draft.
Snake draft.
How am I with Australia?
Snake draft.
Think about that.
Let's see their group.
They're with France, Denmark, Tunisia.
They're finishing bottom of their group.
Ooh.
All right, Nick.
I'm sorry, Nick.
Did you say Tunisia again? Below Tunisia, who's not even on? Sass, you'll have back-to-back They're finishing bottom of that group. I'm sorry, Nick. I'm sorry, Nick. Did you say Tunisia again?
Below Tunisia, who's not even on.
Sass, you'll have back-to-back picks at the end of this round.
All right.
Uh-oh.
Yes!
Oh, Nick!
That good.
Either way, it's good.
Argentina.
They're the favorite.
Are they the favorite?
I know Brazil is.
Fuck.
They're the second favorite.
I mean, that's still really good.
I'm not going anywhere.
Yeah, Nick, you're pretty much set.
Hey, Steve and Che.
It's funny because we're kind of going to know who is going somewhere.
Who's going to be in trouble.
Unless a team has an eight-point game or a nine-point game.
Who's this?
TJ.
No, it's Che.
This is Che.
Canada's not good, right?
And what's your other one?
Che has Spain and Canada.
Oh, you're okay.
It's not bad.
Canada's bad, right?
Yeah, Canada's bad.
But you could go to Canada, which would be the easiest trip.
Oh, yeah.
But it's winter. Oh, yeah. TJ's bad, right? Yeah, Canada's bad. But you could go to Canada, which would be the easiest trip. Oh, yeah. But it's winter.
Oh, yeah.
TJ's up.
What is it in Canada?
Yeah.
Is TJ?
Uh-oh.
Portugal.
Who was your first team?
Poland.
Yes, Poland, who are very good.
That's pretty even.
That's pretty even.
Has the big underdog ever won the World Cup?
Was it me?
You doubt it.
I don't know.
I feel like that doesn't really happen here.
All right.
Rone.
Keep going.
Keep doing that.
I've got Morocco, and now I'm adding.
Ecuador.
Ecuador.
Okay.
Is it Brandon?
Oh, Brandon's cooked.
And it is.
Oh, man.
That's bad, Brandon.
Only man without a passport.
I hate it had to be you.
Zaza.
Zaza.
I have Mexico, and I'm getting...
Oh, you motherfucker.
Game set, match.
He's good.
Had me that 3K already.
Really?
It's over.
He's not traveling anywhere.
It's over.
Damn.
He's not traveling anywhere. He's not. Damn. He's not traveling anywhere.
He's not going anywhere.
He's got the two best teams so far.
Who's your second team?
I have Mexico and Brazil.
Mexico's not the best team, but Brazil is the favorite.
Brazil is going to kill everybody.
Yeah.
There's no chance Zod goes anywhere.
He might not win it all.
Is Brandon fucked right now unless he gets like a big boy?
I have only whales, so this could be bad.
All right, who's up next?
Kate.
She has Japan.
Oh, Kate needs a big one here, too.
I don't know why, but I love shit like this.
Yeah, it's the best.
Oh, no, Kate.
Oh, no.
Oh, Kate.
That's poster.
Those are two good places to go.
But they're bad.
If you vacay there, but those are A1 vacations.
Yeah, but what if she gets a third of Iran? Yeah, that's bad. That could be bad. I'm okay. If you vacay there, but those are A1 vacations. Yeah, but what if
she gets a third of a ran?
Yeah, that's bad.
That could be bad.
That's terrible.
Next up is KB
with Wales.
Cameroon or some shit.
Come on, Kyle.
Come on, Kyle.
Oh, this is big, Kyle.
All right, all right, all right.
It's a huge one.
They're pretty good, right?
Huge one, yes.
At least they're good enough.
Plus 1,300.
It's a huge one. This sucks. I have to wait all the way until the end to get my huge one. They're pretty good, right? Huge one, yes. At least they're good enough. Plus 1,300. It's a huge one.
This sucks.
I have to wait all the way until the end to get my next one.
And you're not even going to get a spin for it.
And I got Denmark, who's a little of the pack, decent.
Not good.
Not good.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
I ran.
Roan, you might be in trouble, my friend.
That could be bad.
Is Iran bad?
Yes.
There's a lot going on there right now.
If you give me a chance to go to Iran, though, I would like it, though.
If you just gave me a reason.
Give me France and England.
Who's this?
Sass?
Double Sass.
So this sets it up for Sass.
Oh, that would be fire to go to.
Let's go.
That would be fire in the summer.
No, didn't they almost win it last time?
They've been in the final last time.
Oh, fuck.
Are they good?
40 to 1.
They're good.
They're a little old.
Oh, a little old.
I need to learn.
So this is sass's last pick.
Give me USA or something.
Give me something.
England.
Oh, that's big.
That's huge.
England bad?
No, they're good.
You ain't going nowhere.
You want to travel.
You're not going anywhere, Seth.
I got Croatia, England, and Switzerland.
You ain't traveling.
That would have been awesome to travel.
As long as you have a big boy, you should be good.
Which one of those is the biggest?
England.
England?
Fuck.
Oh, it's me.
This is my last team.
England should advance.
Fuck, I wanted to go to Iran.
This is your last one?
Yeah. France and Germany are the biggest. Is this your last one? Yeah.
France and Germany are the biggest ones left.
Uruguay as well.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
Denmark, Iran, or Cameroon?
Cameroon.
My favorite place to look at on Snapchat maps.
They always go hard.
Embiid is from there.
Eto'o is.
All right, who's up next? I used to have an Eto'o. I'm E. With whalesiid is from there. Eto is. All right, who's up next?
I used to have an Eto.
I'm E.
With whales in the Netherlands.
God damn it.
I need a good team.
If I have a bad team, I'm going to be fucked.
I'm fucked.
Usa.
Uh-oh.
Oh!
Usa.
Ayo.
I'm fucked.
It's me or Brandon pretty much right now.
USA is not going to be very good, are they?
Who do you have?
Morocco and
Who's next?
Kate's up next with Japan and Costa Rica
Oh, Kate needs one
Kate needs one bad
I'm okay with either one of those though
Morocco and Ecuador
Do you get a round?
Oh no, Kate
I don't like that
I know, and Roan
And see what Brandon gets
I still need one too
I have Ghana
I'm up next
I have Mexico
No don't get another good one
That'd be bullshit
This is gonna be bullshit
There's three good ones still
Give me a friend
Get Cutter
Even it out Wheel
Wheel is just
Way to go, wheel.
Actually, you know what?
I'm actually in Qatar the day after the final, so.
Oh.
Oh, wow.
That count is.
Zah, is Senegal decent or no?
Very good.
And is South Korea bad?
Very good.
South Korea.
So, both of them.
So, Senegal is good.
But South Korea.
They're the best African team.
Are all these things good?
South Korea is good.
It depends on Son's injury. All right. So, South Korea is the worst probably of these last. Uruguay African team. Are all these teams good? South Korea is good. It depends on Son's injury.
All right, so South Korea is the worst probably of these last.
Uruguay is very good too.
Yeah, he's easily the worst.
Easily the worst of South Korea.
So who's up?
I am, I think.
All right, so you can't get South Korea.
If you get South Korea, you're fucked.
Yeah.
Keep going.
Oh, Senegal.
Senegal's 125 to 1.
You're fine.
So I could go to Senegal, Ecuador, or Morocco.
We'll find out which one would be.
Two Africans.
You hit that pass for it, brother.
Third country in Africa.
T.J.
Me, T.J.
Poland and Portugal.
Oh, T.J.'s crushing it.
T.J.'s going to win.
Yeah.
I'm trying to take the walk to Poland.
France.
Oh, T.J. got everyone.
It's a good-ass squad.
I really don't.
I can't have South Korea because then I'm kind of in your guys' spot.
All right, this is you, Steve.
I don't have a chance to win.
Oh.
No.
Yeah, we just don't know.
Yeah, but you have to root for goals in your game, which is exciting.
Like, you have to watch your games and be like, please score.
Who is this?
That's Che.
All right, we're Che. We're good.
We're golden.
This is France and Uruguay are both good.
Is Uruguay good?
Uruguay, what's Uruguay?
They used to be great.
Uruguay is 50 to 1.
Suarez.
I have them as my dark horse.
France is the third favorite.
All right, give me France. This is yours, and then whichever is left is mine.
One last time.
One last time.
Give them Uruguay.
Die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die.
Fuck.
Oh.
Yes.
Home of the first World Cup.
That was a big boy you needed.
I needed that.
Well, I have Belgium, but yeah, I needed that.
So now it's the individual wheels.
Now it's the individual wheels.
We should go back.
Let's just go back the other way on the snake, so it's Big Cat first.
It'll take a second for TJ to probably build them, right?
But this will be good to see all of our countries.
I want someone, can we tweet all of them out, Stephen,
and have someone who knows soccer handicap them?
Like what the chances are?
I'm going to be picking up jerseys of the teams playing against my teams.
I'm going to buy a France jersey right now.
I want my teams to do horrible.
You're going, dude.
I mean, you're staying.
You're not going anywhere.
It sucks.
Teams are too good.
I kind of want to go to France.
That's me catering.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a good one.
I can see me flying to Serbia, just walking outside, smoking a cigarette,
and then I feel like with a beer maybe, a shot of vodka, head on home.
Quick and easy.
You're not going to try and milk it?
I would stay for it.
Serbia?
I don't know what the vibe is.
That's why you had to find out.
Find out what the vibe is.
Can you Google what the vibe of...
Oh, he's working boils.
The vibe of Serbia.
Yeah, what's the vibe?
It's their thing.
Not good.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Bad.
It's bad.
It's bad.
I'm hoping for Denmark over Cameroon
And Iran I guess
But it would be
Why did you want to go to Iran?
Cauliflower is like a Canada goose in Iran
They fucking love that shit
Is it a huge wrestling country?
Huge
Their wrestlers are their Lebrons
Really?
Really
How How dicey would it be Their wrestlers are their LeBrons Really? Yeah How
How dicey would it be for me to go over there?
They wouldn't fuck with your shit
Talk to Julio
You'd have to put on a different personality
Like what kind?
Misogynistic?
Earnest
No can do
That ain't me brother
I just bought two France sweatshirts
Ew dude
You repping France?
Ew bro
Mickey Mouse on them?
That's pretty cool
I gotta pick up my Cameroon jersey
Get some USA gear
So Friday we'll do the whole
everyone
bring
drink
food
and presentation
yeah
yep
are we doing that
with the one country
that we should just do
the one country
that we get
no no no
it's
it's you
you have three countries
so
you have to pick a drink
from one of the three
a food from the other one
and then a presentation
yeah
okay
so all three are covered.
We'll get fucked up.
Yeah.
Denmark's national currency,
the kroner,
has a hole in it.
Oh, cool.
It's like a hole right in the middle.
You can make a necklace out of them
like Froot Loops.
I'd like that.
They got the best fashion there.
Low key.
Denmark?
Yeah.
Yeah. I'm going to have to watch some Rick Steves videos. Low key. Denmark? Yeah. Yeah.
I'm going to have to watch
some Rick Steves videos.
Is he from Denmark?
Like that PBS guy
who he just tried.
I can just look up the country
and see if he's been there.
He goes to all of them, huh?
Yeah.
Fuck, dude.
Anthony Bourdain.
Rest in peace.
What's Cameroon like, though?
What's it like?
Any of you been?
No, I've never been to Cameroon.
That's where Joelle's from, right?
Yeah.
Isn't Siakam?
Siakam's from there too, right?
Is it Francophone?
It looks fun on Snapchat.
That's the only reason I still have Snapchat.
I love it.
It's awesome.
You can just go and look what anyone's doing in the world.
Yeah.
I do that with Instagram all the time.
You zoom in and you pick a location and see what everyone's yeah it's awesome yeah all right so we tweeted out nice this is good job
nick got the oh best place to visit okay um this is good we should also do the winner gets like uh
so the winners can get 3k. I'll fund 2,200
of it and then everyone else has to throw in 100.
And then also the
winner maybe gets
a lunch from
their country. Whoever wins
will do a yak lunch.
Get drunk.
Should there be any other award?
Just one winner, one loser? Should there be
any other incentives to get points?
When does it end?
When's the end of the World Cup?
Sunday, December 18th.
Sorry, I fly on the 19th.
Holy shit.
NFL Sunday?
Crazy, dude.
It's in the morning, Steve.
Crazy.
Time zones.
All right, so.
Fucking soccer.
We got to send someone to one of the countries for a celebration.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Fucking soccer You gotta send someone to one of the countries for a celebration Yeah Maybe we should just all go to one of the countries
Be everyone besides the winner
Most goals scored
Could be something
Peace given up
Maybe I should
I actually like to go
Most goals scored Isn't that what we're basing this off of? No no it's winning Maybe I should go. I actually like to go.
Most goals scored.
Isn't that what we're basing this off of?
No, no, no. It's winning.
You got to win.
To win the money, you have to just win.
You have to win the World Cup.
Oh, I'm confused.
I thought it was goals scored.
To lose.
To win is just one of your things to win.
I think there should be an incentive for getting more goals scored other than not losing.
Right, so most goals scored should get to give a punishment
to second least goals scored.
Yes.
You don't like that? I do.
I think most goals scored should get
their own reward of some kind.
There's a good chance it will be the team
who wins it. They get to give a punishment
to second least goals scored.
It'll almost certainly be the team who wins it.
Yeah, well, not always.
Most goals scored in pool play.
No, no, the full tournament.
Okay.
Yeah.
And it probably will be the team who wins it.
Not always.
Okay.
Right, Zaha?
You get an extra game.
Yeah, but the final usually is like one or two goals.
Usually, it's not always the most goals scored is the team that wins.
What are your teams? No, no, no. It's not always the most goals scored is the team that wins. On what are your teams?
No, no, no, no.
It's usually a team that gets, like, eight goals in the first round.
So, the goals angle will probably, you got to look at the strength of your group.
Yeah, right.
Like, if you're in a terrible game.
Yeah, if you play one putt or two putts, then you're going to get a lot.
You'll get a shitload of goals, and then as you get later in the tournament, most of those games are going to be, like, 2-1 games.
They tighten up, yep.
Like, remember, didn't
Germany beat Brazil
like 8-0?
Oh yeah, 8-2.
That wasn't the final though.
That was in the group stages.
Did Germany win that tournament?
It was Schweinsteiger's tournament.
That's right.
Mule.
Rowan, what are your teams?
Cameroon, Iran, and Denmark.
I'm looking up all the rankings.
I am super fucked.
Everybody's saying Ron's toast.
Uh-oh.
Let's spin these.
Let's see which country we're going to.
This is dumb.
Can Americans even go to Iran right now?
We'll find out if he gets it.
If Americans can't go to Iran, do I get a respite?
It hasn't landed on Iran yet.
Uh-oh. If Americans can't go to Iran, do I get a respite? It hasn't landed on Iran yet.
Top three.
People are saying top three are me, Zah, Stephen, and Sass have the best.
Oh, TJ's good.
That's a big top three.
Top four.
TJ and also Nick.
I'm looking at last.
Top three goes 60.
That's how top three should be. Yeah.
Yeah, Ronas, Toast. The last World Cup, there's... Top three goes 60. That's how top three should be.
Yeah, Ronas, Toast.
The last World Cup, there's... Oh, someone said Chabels.
Mostly three or under points in every game.
Okay.
I think...
1-6, 1-5, the rest.
My teams, while not gaudy, are pretty solid.
Oh, some people are saying Brandon's so fucked.
I don't know.
Senegal and Ecuador are in the same group,
so that almost guarantees one of them is getting through
and will play an extra game.
That's good.
That's good.
Senegal is 125-1.
That's not bad.
They're the African champions.
They're the best team in Africa.
You just learned that.
I told me.
30 minutes ago.
The least goals, you're going.
But the winner is...
The person just had Kate. Oh, we just got to spin the wheels and... And they said they're a soccer team. I know where we're going But the winner is
We just gotta spin the wheels
Who's this?
This is me
So this is where I'll go if I have the least goals
One and done for all these
I think you'd have a blast in any one of these
I love France
Now I'm actually rooting
You've been to France I'm sure right?
Yeah I have and I'm rooting against my team's guy.
I would love to go back.
You're just safe, pretty much.
Yeah.
No matter what.
I do.
I am paying.
That would actually be very funny if I just paid myself.
Yeah.
France wins the whole thing.
Where would you go?
I like how we're all talking about this, like, we can't just actually just, you could just
go to one of these countries.
Yeah, no, I will go to France.
Yeah. You don't actually need to lose to go. No, I could just go to one of these countries. Yeah, no, I will go to France.
You don't actually need to lose to go.
No, I'll never go to France unless I lose.
Who's up next, Nick?
Yeah, yep.
Rome has Denmark, and they're the 10th favorite.
Oh, okay.
That's not that bad. All right.
Oh.
Is it Nick?
Nick, where you're going if you lose?
Uruguay.
Uruguay.
Oh, very nice.
The worst of the three on there?
Yes.
Not really a tourist place.
Is it?
Yes.
They love meat, though.
They're the biggest meat consumers in the world, I think.
They love meat.
Probably have great beef.
It's vegetarian.
Really?
I had them in the country's draft a couple weeks ago.
Longest national anthem.
Is that true?
Yes.
It's beautiful.
Can we fact check it? I think we
played it, didn't we? Oh yeah, we did.
Yeah, we listened to it. The whole thing.
It doesn't look that bad. It looks nice.
Hey, basket. This is a very
blue wheel. Who's this?
Van Gogh. Stephen?
Stephen's not going to be fucked. He's got
Spain. Spain's going to play well.
Yeah, he's not going anywhere.
Canada.
There you go.
South Korea would have been brutal for the tiebreaker.
He has to go to Canada.
Yeah.
We have to pick where he gets to go.
Yeah, he has to go to Resolute.
He has to go somewhere.
None of it.
In winter.
Vancouver.
North of Vancouver.
Calgary.
I have family in Vancouver.
That'd be great.
Damn it.
Rise!
Fucking guy. Been there be great. Damn it. Fucking guy.
Been there probably like a dozen times.
TJ.
Not going anywhere.
TJ's staying home.
Portugal, that's a great one to get.
What if it's winter?
I love this music.
With or without you.
Let's get it.
Where we at?
I think he's got to make every wheel from scraps.
None of them came pre-made, believe it or not.
We didn't buy the full wheel package.
All right, Brandon.
Brandon's best team, according to the Barstool Sportsbook,
is Senegal.
125 to 1.
Oh, shit.
Brandon might be hooked.
Morocco.
Not bad.
That's not bad.
I have three decent teams.
I have no shitty teams.
I have no good teams.
And Ecuador is 200 to 1.
Who are they saying is fucked?
Roan.
There's some Brandon is fucked. I think it's Roan and Kate.
It's also fucked.
I have two terrible teams and one decent team.
Brandon has three mediocre teams.
I'm Morocco.
So I'm going to Morocco, perhaps.
I'd have fun there.
You get your shit pushed in real fast.
You get robbed, et cetera.
You would get robbed, yeah.
I heard it's like a tough spot, actually.
Real fast.
Go to the bazaar and you get eaten alive.
You got that shit pushed in real fast. I think I'd be fine.
Yeah, you say that.
Very sunny.
I blend in well.
All right.
Who's up?
It's me coming up.
And it's Brazil, Qatar.
Oh, you're straight.
Yeah, you're fine.
So you're already going to Qatar.
And look, he's got it.
Yeah!
Why are you going to Qatar?
I'm going home, mate.
Oh, that's what he said.
Threw a mate on your ass.
That's pretty cool.
Nice.
Yeah, I cannot.
This beats in my soul.
She just started having this music playing every show.
Yeah, just lightly in the background.
It's just like you're editing your player's kit.
Yeah.
All right, I'm going to go with the yellows.
I socks.
What?
No one has to go anywhere bad right now.
No, not really.
Uh-oh.
Here we go.
It sounds like Serbia is going to be next.
Yeah, I feel like.
Those famous last words.
See you, Kate.
Yeah.
Costa Rica would be preferable.
Pan would be awesome, too.
And you're going to Serbia.
No, I'm going to Serbia
Kate's got to go to Serbia
Man
Bad news Kate
Serbia
What's Nadu
Albanian
They're one in the same
Tracksuits.
Yeah.
Cigarettes.
Same people.
Bears drinking.
That's what I think.
Caucasus.
Hmm?
Serbia.
The Balkans.
Oh, the Balkans.
Yeah, it's landlocked.
Balkan season.
Belgrade.
Okay.
Serbia actually the best shot here.
70 to 1.
Oh.
Wait, no, no, no, no, no.
Of your group.
Okay. Of yours, yes. no. Of your group. Okay.
Of yours, yes.
Of your group.
Fair enough.
No, no, no, no.
Does it affect anything, really?
Godzilla's the favorite.
They're four to one.
Yeah.
Where am I going, Kyle?
Am I going to Fez?
Casablanca.
Whose is this one?
KB.
Oh, KB.
Casablanca.
It's starting to run.
It's starting to run.
Oh, nice. Well. Not bad. It's starting to run It's starting to run Oh nice Well
Not bad
Geo wizard
Alright lad
Like that Kyle
Alright mate
It is bad
I just got a full Argentina kit
Hell yes
Actually I can't find
Let's get it Uh, actually, I can't find the shorts.
Let's get it.
All right.
Wheel of death.
Let's go.
Oh.
Oh, come on. Here's go. Oh. Oh, come on.
Here we go, Roan.
I'm a Siren.
There's two winners on here.
Denmark.
Give me Denmark.
Oh, Roan.
No.
No.
No.
Let's go.
Roan. Siren. Let's go By Ran
That's so awesome
Well what's the average height of
The Ran team
So it's not even that it's more Cameroon
Has had some political trouble within their team right now.
They aren't on the same page whatsoever.
Oh, no.
What's your third team?
Denmark.
Denmark could make a run.
I don't think Denmark scores goals.
They don't even have a kit.
They're fighting with a kit producer.
It's a mess.
Cameroon, Cameroon.
Get Cameroon a kit.
Can I help them get a kit?
Can I send them down a kit?
I'm sure the people of Iran will appreciate when you show up at the airport
and they're like, what are you here for?
And you're like, oh, it was a punishment.
It's a punishment for a show I do.
Stop saying it now.
We need to start.
Oh, wait.
Wait, you're in a group.
Denmark's in a group with France, Australia, and Tunisia.
I feel like they could put up numbers.
Based off nothing, I feel like they could do it. I don't like my squad. I think put up numbers. Based off of nothing, I feel like
I don't like my squad.
I think Wales, US and
Yeah, you're in trouble. Who are your other
two teams?
Netherlands.
Oh, they're good.
Yeah, but we'll see.
Alright.
So if you lose your group,
you're done, right right There's no consolation
Or there is
In the actual World Cup
Yes
Two teams go to the knockout round
Two teams go home
Okay
Croatia
I could get the Emirates
First class
John through Iran though
Denmark is only
Is plus 170
To finish top 8
That's pretty good
It's not bad.
Okay.
They're the 10th listed team in the top eight betting market.
Okay.
That's not bad.
It's not good.
I need more than just them.
Yeah, no, that's true.
I'm going to Iran.
Yeah, no, you're going to Iran.
I feel like that is.
Is anyone left?
Nope. Me going to Morocco, you going to Serbia, and him going to Iran. I feel like that is... Is anyone alive? Nope.
Me going to Morocco, you going to Serbia, and him going to Iran?
Yeah.
How do we all get the worst place?
Worst ones.
I don't know.
Do we have any Serbian yakkers out there?
I'm sure.
Anybody who can give me some...
I think I might just start a new life in Morocco.
I got to find a Serbian food place here.
Brandon's group might not score a single goal.
That's not true because they play each other.
Oh, but wait.
Brandon, I don't know if you know how soccer
works. No, but Senegal and Ecuador
play. So if
Senegal could get out of that group.
Right, but they could finish 0-0 tie.
This will be awesome.
We can finally root for no action.
What happens with penalty kicks?
Penalty kicks don't count.
It counts as one goal.
Okay.
Fastest flight to Iran is 20 hours.
I was 25.
I feel like.
What a payoff.
Wait, Brandon, what is your other team?
How much, Ron?
Morocco.
No, no.
Morocco, Iran.
Hey, what did you get?
Morocco, Ecuador.
Serbia?
I'm seeing a lot of people saying you have the worst. Morocco, Iran, and – Hey, what did you get? Morocco, Ecuador. Serbia? I'm seeing a lot of people saying you have the worst.
Morocco, Ecuador, Senegal.
Senegal is the best team in Africa.
Everyone's saying it's either TJ or Big Cat that's going to win.
Yeah, Jeff D'Lo said TJ.
Oh, yeah, right there.
What did he say?
Oh, man.
Everyone's saying TJ and Big Cat.
What should I wear to Iran you think?
Can I say
You would look baller in a Iranian dude outfit
Don't you have a shirt?
Maybe you could lend him
I have a shirt
I have wrestling gear
No no no the other shirt you bought
Oh my god
Wait what?
Your 9-11 polo?
They would fuck with that heavy.
Yeah.
Legend.
Yo, legend.
Where did you pick up this shirt, legend?
Yeah, all right, Brittany, you should advance.
If you went to Iran in that, you would never be let back in the United States?
Yeah.
Good point, yeah.
If a picture of you in that shirt in Iran got out, that would be...
I'm trying to just be at the Ritz-Carlton in Iran, drinking like I'm in James Bond or some shit like that.
Just in a tuxedo at the bar having a drink like I'm about to meet up with somebody.
Okay, for first class, it's $14,000.
You could swing that.
Expensive.
Yeah, I am.
Expensive.
Oh, I am.
Trust me.
We need to sell some more ads on this show because this shit is about to get hella expensive.
Denmark is, I'm looking at power rankings, Denmark is sixth.
So you've got a team that's going to go a long way.
Everyone's saying this about everyone.
So someone's got to lose.
Nobody does have to.
Yours are fine because they're all going to kill Qatar.
So goals-wise, you're going to be fine because Qatar's in your group.
That will help.
That will help.
For Ecuador and Senegal.
Yeah, it's about to be a $30,000 trip for your boy.
Think about the YouTube views, though.
Senegal's 14th.
That's true.
Ecuador's 18th.
Those are also, like, the best videos ever.
Yeah, I would love watching those.
14, 18, and 22.
That's not terrible.
And they both play Qatar.
Power-ranked teams.
That's not great.
Not great.
Is there no chance I lose?
There's no chance.
The one thing you have going for you, Brandon,
is that one of your teams will most likely advance.
Yeah, wait.
Is Qatar not the worst team in there?
Qatar's the worst team in there.
But we kept them on.
Yeah. Two other teams. two other teams had longer odds.
It was Tunisia and Saudi Arabia were the two worst betting odds.
That was probably politically motivated.
I don't know.
Keep politics at the World Cup.
Just try to say it.
Sounded right.
Fuck.
Oh, boy.
Is there anything beautiful in Iran? I'm sure there is. I'm going to bring some Moroccan food in. Fuck. Oh boy. Is there anything
beautiful in Iran?
I'm sure there is.
I'm going to bring
some Moroccan food in.
Surprisingly luscious.
There's a great
Not even lush.
Luscious.
There's an Anthony
Levine episode
where he goes
and has a great meal
and blah blah blah
and then at the end
it's like small caveat
the people he had
dinner with
were subsequently
shortly arrested
afterwards.
It's been for 30 years now.
Biblical depiction of paradises.
Oh, and the protest aren't...
Oh, there's crazy protests right now.
Oh, yeah, Ron.
Oh, you're in trouble.
They just sentenced like a thousand people to death.
Women, right?
You're in trouble.
They're executed.
They're stoning, beheading.
Bad stuff is happening around right now.
Ron, you're in trouble, bro.
Yeah, he is.
You might get canceled for going there,
but it's on the wheel.
It's the problem.
You just gotta root
for your other teams.
There's a good chance
you're gonna be so invested, man.
You're gonna live and die
with Denmark, literally.
Also, it might end
before you have to go.
World Cup?
Unrest?
Unrest, yeah.
Can I just say
I'm on the side
of the Iranians.
I don't think these girls
deserve rights, dude. I am honestly on the side of the Iranians? I don't think these girls deserve rights, dude.
I'm honestly on the side.
They're fucking overstepping their bounds.
I don't support that shit that these women are trying to...
Iroan.
Did they get kicked out of the tournament?
Iroan.
I didn't make that joke.
I think TJ put it up there.
I don't want to take credit for it.
Sassy.
Joke thief.
Can't you just fly there and fly back?
No, that's more dicey.
I don't think he would want to.
I would at least want to chill and relax
for a little bit. And I need to stop somewhere on the way
so I can like...
Are you hyperventilating right now?
You could also just illegally cross the border.
Stop in, step out.
That is the move.
Be a good video.
What is Iran?
Sneak in like the Notre Dame game?
Dude, you're a rapper.
I dressed up as an Iranian.
Why don't you just find an up-and-coming Iranian rapper or beat maker and make a song with him?
I forgot that that was a caveat.
What you can do, you can just hop into Afghanistan and then just pop over to
Iran.
We're in Afghanistan.
Oh, man. Dip your toe.
Yeah, just get... What are the other surrounding
countries? We got Turkmenistan.
Oh, all the good stands.
Pakistan.
Turkmenistan would have been the worst place to get.
Iraq.
No, but you actually could go Turkey, Armenia,
or Azerbaijan.
Azerbaijan.
I think you could go, dude, you could get,
Azerbaijan, you get a boat from Lankaran.
It'd be a kayak.
And then just hit up, yeah.
And then just fucking get on the,
we'll get you some scuba gear and you can swim.
I have wanted to go to Gobekli Tepe,
so maybe I could go to Turkey first.
Fuck.
What do you know about Gobekli Tepe?
Nothing. What is it?
It's like the oldest monolithic monument
in human civilization
that predates Stonehenge by 7,000 years
or some shit like that.
These 12-ton blocks that they fucking constructed into a temple
years before the pyramid,
like thousands of years before the pyramids were made with no apparent...
You can just look at it and that's about it.
Oh, I never even heard of it.
I mean, the keys to human civilization kind of run through there.
How could they have built that shit
without modern technology?
There's maybe some ancient technology
that was used there. Get to the bottom
of it.
Rona's
cooked.
Who said that?
Twitter. None of
Brandon's teams are bad, but all of them play
super defensive.
One of them might go through, but but all of them play super defensive. Oh.
I think one of them might go through, but they might do it scoring two goals.
Also have no shot of winning at all.
So when's the third game of the group stage? Because that's when we're going to find out exactly who's – because we'll know.
How long is this?
Weeks?
Oh, no, it's like –
Two weeks?
Yeah.
Six weeks for the entire tournament. Six weeks? Oh, God. For the tournament? Oh, no, it's like... Two weeks? Yeah. Six weeks for the entire tournament.
Six weeks?
Oh, God.
For the tournament?
Oh, man.
When does it start again?
It's not six weeks.
It's like right out of the month
because it starts November 19th
and stops December 18th.
Yeah, five to six weeks.
Jeez.
Oh, yeah, I guess five.
Well, four.
Hmm.
All right, I guess we'll know by...
Do I have to go in December? Do I have to go right before? Winter. You have to go in winter. Yeah, yeah, yeah Do I have to go in December?
Do I have to go right before?
Winter, you have to go in winter
When's their winter, Steven?
It's now
What if it's winter?
Unbelievable
No one ever goes anywhere in winter
Winter in Iran
begins Thursday, December 22nd.
And it ends Tuesday, March 21st.
So you could go immediately after.
It's winter.
It's winter.
It's not an Iranian winter.
It's actual winter day.
Winter in Iran.
Ooh. Off break.
Alright. We'll. All right.
We'll see everyone tomorrow.
All right.
World Cup fever.
Friday will be a big show.
All right.
Can't wait to see what your presentation about Iran is.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah. We'll see you next time. It's the act. It's the act.