The Yak - Sorry Big Cat, Frank The Tank Does What He Wants | The Yak 5-1-23

Episode Date: May 1, 2023

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Of all the things in life, one of the best has to be getting high whenever you want, wherever you want, without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk. What's the best way to do that? With 3Chi, of course. 3Chi has the highest quality cannabis products from their delicious Delta 9 edibles and their industry-leading Delta 8 products to their new line of Delta 9-O vapes and everything in between.
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Starting point is 00:01:02 Use promo code YAK15 to get 15% 15 off your order must be 21 or older to purchase please use responsibly Yo, DJ, hold that up. Hello. Wake up, wake up. It's the first of the month. All right, Roback. Use code Roback. Use code Yak on Roback.com for 20% off your first purchase. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
Starting point is 00:01:45 Roan showing off the Roback. I got them on as well. You look good. I like your pants today. I love your pants today. Yeah, Roback.com. They got shorts coming out for the summer. Roback.com.
Starting point is 00:01:56 Go check them out now. Use code YAK. The hoodie. He looks as handsome as he can. Brandon's eating again. Again. he can brandon's eating again uh again roback.com use code yak on roback.com for 20 off your first purchase q-zips polos hoodies joggers everything shorts hello everyone hi hello brandon smile on your face you floated into work. Monday. It's Monday.
Starting point is 00:02:26 Great sports weekend. Feels good. Rained all weekend and now it's those are the April showers and now it's got May flowers. New month. It rained too much. The rest of the month. A little too much rain. Shit sucked. I hate it.
Starting point is 00:02:42 I guess the listeners are going to be like, why aren't you talking about the thing that happened this morning? We're not going to talk about it because we don't want to be affiliated with that. We don't want to be affiliated with that. And also other people are going to try to pick it up and use it against us.
Starting point is 00:02:58 Mincy's a fucking idiot. Just leave it at that. Man is the dumbest person alive. He really is. I've been saying. You is the dumbest person alive. He really is. I've been saying. You just keep catching wins on that. I've been saying. What are the Stella Blue numbers looking like?
Starting point is 00:03:12 It plummeted again. Oh my God, I can't remember. Any particular roasts that plummeted? More than others? Well, the good news is he did kiss a man, so we're going to maybe pick up. He kissed a man? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Oh. The gay audience. Lose one demographic, gain another. We're going to maybe pick up. Has he kissed a man? Yeah. Oh. The gay audience. So. Lose one demographic, gain another. Yeah, but the gay audience is kind of liberal. Yeah. So. I think that's false.
Starting point is 00:03:33 Is it? Is it? I don't think they're a monolith. I think that there's people within. Of course they're not a monolith. No, they're all the same. Yeah. They all think the same thing.
Starting point is 00:03:45 How's everyone doing? It feels, I miss the popcorn. You being pregnant went dummy viral. A lot of people. Oh, picking up off the floor. Oh, you. Yeah, you being pregnant. I wrongfully assumed Kate.
Starting point is 00:03:58 Oh, yeah. No, no, no. I didn't do much numbers. No, Kate, no. You did get crazy numbers on the pregnancy announcement. Yeah, the announcement had a ton of numbers. Picture did nummies? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:09 It was like a thousand retweets. People were just responding as of yesterday. Like, I just posted it. Okay, well. Everyone just was mad. Like, there was, obviously, people knew I was joking. Then there were people who had no, like, were not on a plane. They didn't bring that up.
Starting point is 00:04:24 Like, they didn't bring up the fact that you're 22 weeks pregnant. They just assumed that was the truth. They were just like, pick up the fucking popcorn. It is one of those where you get 9,000 Twitter responses that are exactly the same. I saw why the buddy pregnant a lot. Yeah. You've been fishing for Twitter responses lately, though. Have I?
Starting point is 00:04:41 Is this the best Center Ice logo? Yeah. You know that's going to get. What do you guys want to talk about at 4 a.m.? I don't know what to do at 4 a.m. Sleep! I don't... I got a lot going on in my life. I don't have much going on at all. I just can't sleep.
Starting point is 00:04:56 Why don't you take some melatonin? Took it. Took six of them. Six? Jesus Christ, bro. You're strong like an ox. 60 milligrams in there. That shit doesn't do anything. The more you take it, the less it works. Yeah, and then... You're strong like an ox. 60 milligrams. That shit doesn't do anything. The more you take it, the less it works. Yeah, and then you basically are tasing yourself every night. Ever since the kid thing where he ate a bunch of melatonin and the poison control lady on the phone says,
Starting point is 00:05:13 yeah, melatonin really doesn't do anything. It doesn't phase me. You're going through 100 replies at 4 a.m. Yeah, that can't be healthy. No, it's not healthy at all. Not even healthy. You're not going to fall asleep. Correct. You need to get rid of blue light before you sleep it's not healthy at all. But I feel. Not even healthy. You're not going to fall asleep. Correct.
Starting point is 00:05:25 You need to get rid of blue light before you sleep. It's what you need. What you need. Is that the phone light? Looking at you. Yeah, there's also like on Friday night, I was watching all the games. And I was like, I want to go to sleep at like 11 o'clock. I'm going to stop tweeting.
Starting point is 00:05:39 Because I know that if I do, I'll get into it. Like 11 to 2 a.m. is when I can play my video games. It's when I can play my MLB The Show. Really? I'm not even making a joke. He really is like 12 years old. I can play my MLB The Show. I played three games against the Mets yesterday, and I have to knock out.
Starting point is 00:05:55 You're wired. I have to knock out series at a time. Your wife catching you under the covers with like a flashlight and a Game Boy. It's tough to go. Every athlete knows it's tough to go to sleep after a big game. She interrupted me last night She wanted to have sex What?
Starting point is 00:06:08 I don't know Turned her down for the video games? No I didn't She's still fucking That's disgusting What's up Sass? You lay it down? How's San Fran?
Starting point is 00:06:21 How's San Fran? Yeah It was good I feel so shitty. I feel like I'm still sick. You've been traveling. Dude, it's so bad. It's so bad.
Starting point is 00:06:33 Why don't you get a new vape? Hit a new vape. I know. I think you're dying. I think it's those San Fran vapes. I think you're diseased. They're fucking me up. They're empty.
Starting point is 00:06:40 Chance you're dying? Hopefully not. We all are, right? Oh, yeah. Sixers tonight. Stream. I got strong-armed by Frank the Tank. Happened. I told him, I was like, I think you should stream Game 7, Devils-Rangers.
Starting point is 00:06:57 And he was like, well, I'm going to go to the game. And I was like, if the Devils lose, you're at the game, you saw Game 7 loss in person, that sucks. If the Devils win, you're at the game, you saw a Game 7 loss in person, that sucks. If the Devils win, you have more playoff games you get to go to. Like, come do the streak. That's a good logic. He checkmated me, though. What did he say?
Starting point is 00:07:13 He said that if the Devils lose, I'd like to be there to give them a standing ovation for a job well done this year. Really good, yeah. Oh, wow. I don't have a response to that. Kind of shocking to hear from you. You got him badly.
Starting point is 00:07:24 He also doesn't seem like a standing ovation for a lost guy. No. I don't know why he said he would do it. So is he going to have cameras on him? I am now. I've now been so strong-armed by Frank the Tank. Glennie's going with him, and I have to buy an extra ticket for someone to videotape them. So what started as, Frank, you should do your job and come on the stream,
Starting point is 00:07:44 now has me paying money for a Game 7 ticket. He has no job in security, though. None. He knows he's cranking out content. He just did another Tank Cooks that he was showing me. Chicken fried steak coming out next week. He's a machine.
Starting point is 00:08:00 Yeah, he just bullied me. I couldn't do anything about it. I had no answers for the man. To give them a standing O? We better get footage of that whole standing O. I want to see every single, I want to see until he, like, everyone better be off the ice. Now, is this something that the crowd will do anyways?
Starting point is 00:08:18 I think it happens. Yeah, it happens. He's going to lead it, though. Yeah. I kind of respect, I mean, like, Frank goes to every Devils game, right? He has season tickets. He's gone to every Devils game this year. So kind of respect. I mean, like, Frank goes to every Devils game, right? He has season tickets. He's gone to every Devils game this year. So to not go to a game seven goes against who he is.
Starting point is 00:08:29 Right. I understand. My counterpoint would be that we have literally the best job in the world, and all you have to do is watch your big games on stream. We do have the best job, and you could do or say most things. Right. Right. This is also the first round
Starting point is 00:08:46 first round yeah but it's it's range of devils is right yeah uh max just walked by and ronan max are just like two two dogs we're not getting pushed around by fucking hank first off yeah max went to villanova he's smart smart. He is smart. Villanova's got to be the hardest school. Is Villanova harder to get into than Wisconsin? Probably. It's a pretty good school. He might be the best educated man on
Starting point is 00:09:15 part of my take. Yeah. I don't know about that. Best educated. Which school has a better track record? Unfortunately, I guess you would have to say Billy. Oh. Yeah, Williams is a really good school. Unfortunately, I guess you would have to say Billy. Oh. Yeah, Williams is a really good school. Oh, it goes Billy and then Max. It hurts.
Starting point is 00:09:29 And then the rest of you slubs. We're not getting pushed around mentally. I think Williams is like top three hardest schools in New England probably to get into. Yeah. So him and Billy are the fucking brain trust of that show. And you're going to have to respect it. He is? Yeah. Oh, damn it. He went to a defunct college for a going to respect it. He is? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:45 Oh, damn it. He went to a defunct college for a year. Damn it. His whole college dropped out? Yeah, his whole college stopped. That's crazy. Like, they went out? They went under?
Starting point is 00:09:54 It was, I don't know exactly. I think it was, like, Southern New Hampshire. Oh, no, actually, I think the first year he went to Southern New Hampshire. Is that a school? That's like that school they advertise that's online, right? Yeah, he went to that one, and then he went to a film school that ceased to exist. Oh, okay. Max is a genius, and we're not getting pushed around by Hank mentally.
Starting point is 00:10:17 Yeah, but you guys are going to get spoiled. I don't need him to be. You guys are going to get destroyed. Wah, wah, wah. Oh, yeah, the thing that everybody thinks is going to happen always happens. I'm not buying it. I'm not going to buy it for a second. Wake Up Mincy just rolls along and has years and years of success.
Starting point is 00:10:33 It didn't happen. Positive is going to happen. Is it done? Are they shutting it down? I don't know. I think it's going to be paused. There's only been a major slip up in 14% of the episodes. Spin, like 86% of the episodes is very impressive.
Starting point is 00:10:55 I don't like people touching our outback, dude. And I told Donnie that he could have some if he told us about his trip to Nepal, but I don't know. He did that psychedelic honey. He brought some back. Those cliffs. Yeah, he had adverse reactions. He vomited foric honey. He brought some back. He had adverse reactions. He vomited for two hours. Yeah, it's here. Should we put it on the wheel? Psychedelic honey?
Starting point is 00:11:13 He did too much. Would he also pack KB? 9% Zin? Never will I ever again. Are you about to do one? 9 milligrams. I haven't done one in a month. KB, don't.
Starting point is 00:11:26 Don't do it, KB. It's such a good rush, though. No, no. Don't sell nine milligrams. I'm doing everything right. You're about to do two of them? Yeah. No, KB.
Starting point is 00:11:37 KB, no. Put it between your toes. Don't do it. Let's do it. KB, no. Don't do it. Don't do it. Put it back.
Starting point is 00:11:44 Put it back. Put it back. You're in a good spot right now. Put it back. Put it back. No, you're not. Put it back. Put it back. Put it back Put it back Put it back Put it back Put it back Save it Save it Here take a couple more
Starting point is 00:11:51 Just for the road Yeah your song Did incredibly online I think that's my favorite Yak moment of all time That song I love it so much It's stuck in my head
Starting point is 00:12:02 It was in my head All weekend It was so good It was in my head all weekend. It was so good. I think DJ did the edit with the voice or X Factor, whatever the singing show is. The voice. Very, very funny. That whole yak was so fucking funny and so random.
Starting point is 00:12:19 Popcorn Day. It was. It was good. Can't wait for Popcorn Day 2024. Shame y'all accidentally spilled so much of it, though. My face when the bottom got cut out was very funny. Really sad. It's never been cleaner in this room.
Starting point is 00:12:32 I know. Really? Clean the fuck out of this room. Look at it. Nick had like a Ghostbusters vacuum on his face. I was having the time of my life. It's very therapeutic. I love just... Sucking?
Starting point is 00:12:43 Yeah, I guess. Fuck. What's sad? Tell us about San Fran, bro. Yeah, San Fran. Dude, San Fran was great. Maybe we were in a nicer area. San Fran's very nice. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:12:56 Everyone who says every city is dying is just on Twitter and refuses to go there. You would think New York is a a murderous right when you go to a city you realize oh all the tweets about all this shit doesn't happen every day
Starting point is 00:13:11 every square inch of the city I kept on talking I kept on making fun of Francis because he was like everyone I've talked to said it's turned into
Starting point is 00:13:18 like a complete shithole and then we got there and I was like dude this is fucking awesome like it's a nice city yeah beautiful city
Starting point is 00:13:24 I'm assuming the homeless people must be in one specific area because there are really way more homeless people here than there were there. You'll turn a street and it'll be the whole street. A thousand of them. Tenderloin area especially. Wherever we were, there was not a lot of homeless people.
Starting point is 00:13:39 It's a beautiful city. We walked a lot. Deep ass hills. Alcatraz was pretty cool i wanted to tour it we didn't tour it did you get on a boat no you didn't you just you just saw it yeah no i yeah you can just saw the bridge i'd imagine yeah but dude the fog is crazy yeah so you never really get to see or we never got to see the full bridge you just get to see like parts of it yeah Did you have any fish? No. No, I had shrimp. Francis ordered 24 oysters
Starting point is 00:14:08 and I assumed it was like for me and him and just for him. He ate 24 oysters. That's pretty standard. Yeah? It's hard to get full off oysters. They don't fill you up. They're not that hardy. It's gross after a while though. Were they raw?
Starting point is 00:14:22 Were they raw oysters? People got mad you can't call Sam It's gross after a while, though. Are they raw? Are they raw oysters? Oh. People got mad you can't call it San Fran. Dude. Frisco. We just start calling Colorado Rado like I do. Who told them that SF works? That doesn't work.
Starting point is 00:14:36 No, it doesn't. It's just one of those dumbest things. I said it so, like, obviously joking. I was like, you guys don't like when people say San Fran huh and this dude in the front row furious like looked like he wanted to fucking kill me
Starting point is 00:14:53 and he's like would you call your country a cunt oh I will now I mean Philadelphia is Philly and I know dude it was insane. Half the world calls Chicago Chirac. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:08 And they don't like that. Yeah, no, it's... Dude, it's also like, like, what the fuck? Stop a comedy show? Dude, Donnie, before I went, I, like, promoted the show and I was, like, gonna be in San Fran this weekend
Starting point is 00:15:18 and Donnie replied and he was like, are you joking by saying San Fran? He's like, that's, like, the number one thing that they get, like, furious about. I was like, there's no way they actually get that mad and I said dude like I've had people get mad on stage like normal that's the craziest part was like insane I know people don't like it but to stop a comedy show is crazy yeah yeah that's crazy nuts at least Mincy didn't say that. Yeah. It could be worse. It could be worse.
Starting point is 00:15:47 What did he say? Nuclear? How was the crowd? How was the crowd out there? He just doesn't know how to read ahead. He was coming. He couldn't get off the train tracks. He got up on him.
Starting point is 00:16:05 Bad. He wasn't even get off the train tracks. Knocked up on him. Bad. He wasn't even tied to the train tracks. I felt, I watched Israan Burgundy. I laughed so hard. And then I watched it again and I felt bad. And then a third and then it was funnier. I don't want to use the word perfect for
Starting point is 00:16:21 something like that. The text, the waking up to that text from you, Dan. Yeah. It was like, hey, buckle up. This happened. Yeah. I texted everyone in my phone. Because I knew I was the only one who was up watching that show, that program.
Starting point is 00:16:41 I will say, I read the text. It made me so uncomfortable, just the idea of it. I watched the video like five times with no volume. Yeah. To get to see what I was getting myself into. It's like when you buy a new fish for the tank and you keep it in the bag. Exact same kind of thing. Also, I've never seen the move before, and we shouldn't talk about it for too long.
Starting point is 00:17:02 I think he tried to live edit. Yep. Yes. He said, It was live editing. Like an auctioneer. It took me a lot of watches to notice there was a man in the background.
Starting point is 00:17:17 That's the man he kissed. That's the man he kissed. He smooched his way out. Okay. He smooched his way out of any hole. He seemed to be all right. It was the fastest growth of a man I've ever seen because the next time that word was on the lyric sheet,
Starting point is 00:17:28 it switched to like a sneaky kung fu user. I guess we should have realized the show hadn't had a first of the month yet. It's bound to happen whenever the first of the month calendar. God damn it. Why couldn't to happen whenever the first of the month calendar. Damn it. Why couldn't it have made first bit of two?
Starting point is 00:17:49 And he was just bullet pointing all of his events from last week and Monday. We pull up the yak Twitter account and just go to our
Starting point is 00:17:59 replies. We just need to do a little ghost edit. Tweets and replies. Yeah. Keep scrolling. Keep scrolling. Two jobs.
Starting point is 00:18:16 He has two jobs. Oh, no. Wake the fuck up. Wake the fuck up. It's two jobs. Two, yeah. He's hilarious. He's 0 for 2.
Starting point is 00:18:31 He should pre-record every time now. Yep. It is so funny that that was the first that everyone was shitting on him for pre-recording. Yeah. It just doesn't. I would not put it past him to pre-record that and keep that in. Nope. No question about it. You want me to pre-record that and keep that in. Nope.
Starting point is 00:18:47 No question about it. You want me to pre-record? This is what happens. I'm going to do it at night. You want me to work? This is what happens. Yeah, we had a big slip-up. Something got through. It's quite something.
Starting point is 00:19:02 So, Ron, do you really think the Sixers have a chance? Of course. No hesitation. In, Ron, do you really think the Sixers have a chance? Of course. No hesitation. In the series, I agree. That they have a chance in the series? Yes. You don't think that they have a chance tonight? I don't think so.
Starting point is 00:19:13 They had some big wins without Embiid this season. Celtics have a win. On the road against the Celtics. They're worldly. Huh? Oh, the Celtics struggled against the Hawks. Yeah, they struggled. They've had big wins.
Starting point is 00:19:22 I can look into them if you would like me to crunch those stats. I believe you. This isn't that. I believe you. It's not that. But I truly do believe in them. But I also like the Celtics are a great team. I'm just ready for war.
Starting point is 00:19:33 Yeah. I'm ready for war. Are you going to go to any of the games? I'm probably going to watch them around here and then the most dangerous game shows. Oh, that's right. Coming up. So I'm going to be out. How long is that? I think it's a week. so I'm going to be out. How long is that? I think it's a week.
Starting point is 00:19:47 Where is it going to be this time? Same place? I don't know if that's announced yet. Okay. I don't know if... Is the cast list announced yet? I don't think that's announced either. Is the show's existence announced yet?
Starting point is 00:19:57 Yeah. Certainly. Does the cast have anyone that's been cancelled? That's all, folks. Oh, God. There was a palpable buzz in the office today. It was like a holiday. Well, not for me.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Who else is representing the Celtics tonight? We're doing a stream. Hank. Is it just me and Max bash-brothering Hank's dumb ass? I think it might be. I'm going to drag him through the streets. Pat, maybe. Donnie.
Starting point is 00:20:42 I'm a Celtics fan. Donnie might be here. Shut up, sass sass ass i'm from massachusetts fights fights is dead right yeah that was a sad video dude that was pretty crazy yeah i was like you guys know me very well i'm the king of awkward content even i it was too their heartbreak was too sad for me to say anything in the moment. Like, I left the room. Jake silently celebrating was fantastic.
Starting point is 00:21:10 He's a monster. Sash, who's like the Celtics starting lineup? I don't know a single player on the Celtics. Yeah, you do. I don't. You can name one. You can name one. Give us one.
Starting point is 00:21:21 I genuinely can't. You can name one. Is Taco still on the team? No. That was the last guy I know. You know something. I used to watch Celtics when I was growing up. I haven't watched a Celtics game in probably close to 10 years.
Starting point is 00:21:33 Some of the guys who are on the team with – Well, name five Celtics. Rondo? Rondo's not on the team anymore, is he? Name five Celtics ever. That's one. You can do that. Oh.
Starting point is 00:21:42 Two already. Taco, Rondo, Paul Pierce, Kevin Garnett. Nailed it. And. Fucking. That one dude. I'm going to go with the big one. I already said the big one.
Starting point is 00:21:56 Who, Shaq? Yeah. Shaq was on Celtics. I was thinking Larry Bird. He was. Larry Bird. Shaq was not on the Celtics. I saw Shaq.
Starting point is 00:22:03 He was on Celtics. Yeah, he was. I saw Shaq play. I saw Shaq. Yeah, he was. Yeah, he was. He was the big shamrock. I saw Shaq play against the Celtics once. Oh, he would, remember when Shaq had that, he was just bouncing around the teams giving himself different nicknames every time? Yeah. He was the big cactus
Starting point is 00:22:15 when he went to the Suns. Big shamrock. Trivia question, what number was he on the Celtics? Oh, no idea. 99? Double zero? He, no idea. 99? Double zero? Well, he was 34 regularly, right? He was 34 at the Lakers.
Starting point is 00:22:31 He was 32 in Orlando. 32? I'll have to check. I believe it's 36. Oh, you don't know the answer? I'm pretty sure it's 36. Yes. He actually was on the Celtics? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:40 Big shamrock. He was just so fat at the end It was awesome What else should we talk about? I can only think about one thing It's hard I guess we probably shouldn't talk about it a lot Or maybe we should talk about it the whole episode
Starting point is 00:23:02 And let's do the 12-hour stream today, too. Kate. Yeah. You went looking for a house, huh? I did. You were in Chirac? I was in Chirac. I can't believe I made it out.
Starting point is 00:23:20 Again, Chicago's awesome. I hadn't been in a while. It is such a cool city. It made me super excited for this move. Went around the West Loop a little bit where the office is going to be. But went all over. Saw a ton of places. Some JP's.
Starting point is 00:23:35 What's that? Graziano's. Yeah, you got to be Graziano's. I didn't do any of that. What was that accent? I think he just got some of the sounds that he threw in. He got the first sound. Is that Australian?
Starting point is 00:23:47 I'm just talking shit. I got Grazianis. I got Grazianis. Grazi-Azi-Azis. Yeah. Grazianis. Oi, oi, oi. No, it was great.
Starting point is 00:23:56 It was awesome. Just a really fun, cool city. Went all over. Put an offer in on a really irresponsible house. You put an offer? What was the selling point? What did you like about it? She's so stupid, man. It's the most irresponsible possible thing.
Starting point is 00:24:12 She sent me that. She showed me the house, right? It's bad. She's got a toddler now, a cat, a fat guy, and then she's pregnant. Oh, the beef is not fat. It's not fat. You're fat. Do not say that. Beef is not fat. Beef is not fat. You're fat. I'm categorically fat like you.
Starting point is 00:24:25 Beef is not fat. Fertile. Do not say that. We're the same. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Harry. No way. He's a very handsome man.
Starting point is 00:24:34 Harry gets mistaken for fat. I was going to say he wasn't good looking. Right. He's Harry, not fat. Okay, fine. She's got all this. And she's pregnant. And she has a spiral staircase with open air stairs.
Starting point is 00:24:44 There's no. Just put a gate up. No, that. See? Put a fucking gate up. What about when she's going up there eight months pregnant? Just put a gate up. Oh, she ain't going to slide down.
Starting point is 00:24:52 She's got a gate herself. Slip through the stairs. Also, the cat, like a cat can jump anywhere. I love that. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. But I was looking at all apartments, but this was the only actual house I could afford. And I said, fuck it.
Starting point is 00:25:07 Let's do it. Why not? Hell yeah. So needs a ton of work. I don't like you calling the beef. Carpeted bathroom. Carpeted bathroom. Like us.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Yeah. Beef is in good shape. The beef could flip a car if he had to. How about he comes in and whips your ass, Brandon? Damn straight he could. Fuck yeah. Did you flip a car, Brandon? to. How about he comes in and whips your ass, Brandon? Damn straight he could. Fuck yeah. Did you flip a car, Brandon? No, we were so strong.
Starting point is 00:25:30 Staunchly beef. We're pro-beef. We are not bad. We are pro-beef. Like it. Come on. We love the beef. Listen, we would kick you to the curb for the beef in a second.
Starting point is 00:25:41 Well, that's not necessary. You got way better shirts than you. Way better shirts. We have an extra microphone. Would one of us get killed in the next Chainsaw Massacre movie? Yeah, you could make that. They're doing another one. They're doing another, so you could.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Brandon? Sass? I want to be sass. I would love to do that. I feel like you'd be great getting killed in that. It'd be awesome. Good-ass shirts on the beef. I have a whole list of ones he can't wear to the playground. Really? He's got like a man eating out an armadillo.
Starting point is 00:26:10 That's like keep-off-some-weird. Licking an armadillo pussy? Yeah. I don't know. That's kind of cool. That is cool. Oh, Brendan does wear fucking shirts. Sorry I said something momentarily about the beef being too big for those stairs.
Starting point is 00:26:25 Those stairs are ridiculous, Kate. Yes. Too big for stairs? What has he ever heard of? Is he Gilbert Grape's mom? It's a very tight spiral. Oh, oh, oh, oh. A popper nickel.
Starting point is 00:26:40 God damn it. Sturdy ass bread, though. It's sturdy ass. That was, yeah. Yeah. That bread did not budge. No, it didn't. Good ass bread.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Yep. Oh, no, the butter's loose. Where's the butter? Where'd it go? Found the butter's, oh, no. On your damn shoe. It's on the tongue of your shoe. Your shoe got hungry.
Starting point is 00:27:03 Oh, it got buttered. A perfect dollop. You ever do that prank in high school where you have a butter labeled one and a butter labeled three and everybody's looking for the number two butter? I was going to say, this seems like something Rowan would do to you. Just walk over and just... Butter on
Starting point is 00:27:19 your shoe. Where's the other butter? You put butter on my shoe? Do you want to do the Outback for your dollar? Yeah, no. You've got butter shoes. There's nothing better than a You put butter on my shoe? Yeah, no, you've got butter shoes. There's nothing better than a good old butter spill. I missed eating Outback this weekend. I've got the itch now every single day. It's like every single day.
Starting point is 00:27:36 It's the eighth wonder of the world. Yeah. Great barrier eats at Outback Steakhouse. That new menu is crazy good. Oh, my gosh. Best of land, best of sea. $16.99. Yes. Come on, bro. Slap a $20 on the table. Give it a little extra
Starting point is 00:27:50 for the tip because at Outback they work hard and they deserve it. I wouldn't slap a $20 on the table. That's disrespectful. You wouldn't. You absolute rogue. But one thing I do love is that Tasmanian shrimp and lobster pasta. Ooh-wee pasta i'm rib prime rib is
Starting point is 00:28:07 fantastic tim tam brownie cake yes oh my god that's it so fucking good i i've always been a fan of tim but this is my first time having tim with tam yeah like tim or tam better uh they're they combine in a beautiful medley yeah this some of the parts is bigger than whatever the hell that's that's saying is outback blooming onion with aussie cheese fries oh my gosh it is elite they've introduced us the the mac daddy steak and make combos i mean you can check it out for yourself great barrier eats menu at your local Outback Steakhouse or order it for delivery at Outback.com. Outback, yum. What'd you just get, some meat? Burger patty.
Starting point is 00:28:51 You got a burger patty? You look fucking jacked today, Kyle. Crazy. A little too hard because I feel like shit. Oh. The showers still make me feel great, but I'm tired and anxious. The coldies? The cold showers? Showers are hot. I great, but I'm tired and anxious. The coldies? The cold showers?
Starting point is 00:29:06 Showers are hot. I wake up and I need them. I thought about doing the shower today, but I'm a pussy. You just have to go like, fucking warrior yourself up to it. Yeah, you got to Wim Hof. Wim Hof does change it. You don't do it, Seth. No, I don't take cold showers either.
Starting point is 00:29:24 Pretty easy solution to that Hot showers Yeah So don't tell him what he's gotta do You bastard Right Rules for thee and not for me I almost did it again
Starting point is 00:29:35 Head S, head S I almost did it again You're right You won Fuck bro, fight back I don't have anything in me to fight back Stay for the stream tonight then. I can't. I got shit to do
Starting point is 00:29:47 all day. Bullshit. Really? Video games? No, no video games tonight. Gotta get his last burst of video games in before his big trip. Big trip. Oh, when's your trip? Tomorrow. Where's your big trip? You know where I'm going, brother. You go to Iceland tomorrow? Tomorrow? Holy shit. Oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:30:03 I'll be here tomorrow. My flight's not till 8. There's no chance. Yeah, I will. You're in Texas and you're going to be like... No, I have to. I have to do shit tomorrow. Okay.
Starting point is 00:30:13 I'm out Wednesday for the rest of the week. Where are you going? Stella Blue trip. Shit. Aren't you out too? Thursday. It's Thursday. Kyle, are you out?? Thursday It's Thursday
Starting point is 00:30:25 Kyle are you out? I'll find out today He finds out today if he's out Why? You wouldn't go? I think Kyle's a felon Oh you gotta go to England I yeah
Starting point is 00:30:35 Wait you're going to England? Yeah Wednesday I paid a lot of money to have it expedited Three days it's a service I didn't realize after you pay You still have to book an appointment with one of the agencies. And they're all booked up until the end of May. I don't know what to do.
Starting point is 00:30:52 We'll see. Help Kyle out. Can someone get Kyle in? I think you're a felon. This is a passport issue? But the person apparently that you've been in contact with is very, very high profile. Apparently. I have a middleman, so I haven't talked to him.
Starting point is 00:31:05 It's somebody very closely associated with the Trump administration. Is that who it is? Yes! I don't know. I don't know. It's Mike Pence! Mike Pence! You need an expedited passport? Yes.
Starting point is 00:31:26 I can help you. What? Perfect. Can you get it by Wednesday? Same day. Two days. Same day? Yeah, you just need to wake up super early.
Starting point is 00:31:34 This is a place in New York City. I had it happen. Tommy Smokes is punching air out there right now. People are saying things like this. He's on a alternative. I literally went to that. How do you book these random appointments? You don't book it.
Starting point is 00:31:44 You got to show up at like 4, 35 a.m. It's downtown. Why? What? Because there's a line. And if you want to get it same day, then you got to wait. From my understanding, they need to ship. Nope.
Starting point is 00:31:56 You just get it right there? Yep. How long might he be in that line? Hours. Che is not. Are you sure about this? I did it a few years ago. He's the 1-1.
Starting point is 00:32:09 Was it 1-A or 1-1? The 1-1 kid, yeah. The 1-1 kid. Pre-COVID? Yes. I don't know if that's a thing anymore. Che, when you see a long line, are you like, this is going to be my bitch? I am built different, so he's got a pair of the knees and more so the mind.
Starting point is 00:32:29 What's the longest line you've ever sat in? NFL draft, 2006. How long? 14 hours. Oh, my God. Did you even get a good seat? Guy's built different. You are built different
Starting point is 00:32:45 uh general admission it was just waiting in line for the wristband to go back later in the day oh but then did you get a good seat yeah i mean all the seats were it was javits center so was it worth it were you like yeah that was great yeah how about you guys it's like the longest i camped in a camped in line one I've done that. 20 minutes? Dude, I'm like five minutes, and I'm like, I'm going... Fuck a line. I'm not saying a line. I go to Dwayne Reed if there's a line that's more than three people. I go to the bodega instead.
Starting point is 00:33:12 Yeah. I was for a McDonald's opening up in Morgantown. Mine was for Chick-fil-A. I camped in a line for season tickets for the Badgers, but that was fun. Well, this was a blast. Everybody was getting drunk. Everybody had this McDonald's just opening. You got free Big Macs for a year if you're the first hundred.
Starting point is 00:33:27 I go in and they're like, you're like the 700th person. I'm like, fuck. That sucks. Why wouldn't they tell people? I know. And I got in. You got in? I got free sandwiches for a year.
Starting point is 00:33:37 God damn. I spent the night. It was February in the Philly area. It was like 20 degrees, and I didn't bring a tent. I just had my mom drop me off at the lawn chair and other people adopted me, took me into their tent. The cow kept coming out with free food all night long. They played a Christian movie.
Starting point is 00:33:50 Did you go like all the time to get your free food? I actually left for boot camp like a week later. Oh my God. Kate. I know. But it was my way of being like, here's how I'll take care of the family while I'm gone. Here, mom. Have these 365 chicken sandwiches.
Starting point is 00:34:06 I just wanted the card. Yeah. That'd be cool to just carry that card. Yeah. It's a baller move. But it was fun. She's eating her Outback. This is illegal.
Starting point is 00:34:13 That's what I'm saying, bro. People are crazy. Oh, again. Look at that. He has so much meat on his plate. You said he could have it Friday and he's just going to come every day now? I just want to make him feel good. You haven't eaten yet, Billy.
Starting point is 00:34:23 He was putting a third burger on his plate. He was having a third burger. He had so much food the other day. Go ahead. We took all the steak the other day. He took all the steak. It was just sitting out there. Racking up another appearance.
Starting point is 00:34:35 Just puts him on the wet wheel. None of us eaten yet. You're going for your third burger. Go ahead. Have a third burger. What are you doing? Why aren't you talking? What the hell is this?
Starting point is 00:34:51 There's always so much left over after. You had 75% of the steak the other day. Don't you guys eat it? No, we're doing a show. Okay. Go ahead. You can have it. Have your burger.
Starting point is 00:35:01 Have your burger. Have your third. No, no, no. Actually, don't have a fourth. Have four burgers. Put some ribs on there while you're at it. Four. Some ribs. Have your burger. Have your burger. Have your third. No, no, no. Actually, don't have a fourth. Have four burgers. Put some ribs on there while you're at it. Four. Some ribs.
Starting point is 00:35:08 Have four. I want four. What's in his pocket? Why don't you eat four? Probably more burgers. Yeah, probably burgers and bread. Billy's got like a fucking high school principal ass. Oh, he's doing the shrug talk that he does when he knows he's 100% hot ass.
Starting point is 00:35:22 He just put three plain burgers on his plate with nothing else. That's what Kyle's eating, right? The vultures are out today. We have the same habits now. It's like a pack of gum in middle school. Exactly like a pack of gum in middle school. Don't ever want to offer it. It's always a good person to have around The lady who has gum in her purse
Starting point is 00:35:45 Yeah I'm kind of her You are? I've been keeping so much gum on me You got any Big Red? God no I want shit that makes my breath smell better Not that loses flavor in 10 seconds
Starting point is 00:35:57 You guys used to do the Big Red Challenge On the bus when you were a kid Oh Oh you lick the wrapper And you stick it on your forehead And then it starts to burn Yeah Oh
Starting point is 00:36:04 And then it leaves a giant Like and you stick it on your forehead, and then it starts to burn. Who can keep it on? Because it burns. And then it leaves a giant neon red rectangle on your forehead. That was like a badge of honor. You kept it on long enough. I didn't know about that. Damn. It really burns. Did that see that? Yeah, I was motioning.
Starting point is 00:36:16 Do you want me to go get some Big Red? Yeah. Go get some Big Red. Yeah, it burns. Burn my forehead? Big Red wheel? I kept a suction cup on my forehead for like two hours
Starting point is 00:36:26 once and I had the biggest bruise on my face 11th grade I have an interview I have to do it too Brandon you're gonna this might kill you
Starting point is 00:36:34 spicy shit on your skin oh you're right anyone who has a migraine walking migraine put it on the wheel this will probably pull the migraine out of you. What if this is the answer that I've been looking for for so many years?
Starting point is 00:36:50 Migraines are mysterious as hell, man. That shit really sucks. I don't like it. Baycat, where did you see Federer? At a bar in Red Hook. So it wasn't like an event? No. Just happened to see him?
Starting point is 00:37:05 It was a very small, best burgers in Red Hook, Red Hook Tavern. Like, maybe a 50-person restaurant? It's like an Irish pub kind of vibe, and he was just sitting there. I was like, fuck, that's Roger Federer. Was it packed? It was packed, jam-packed. But yeah, I asked him for a picture after, and he held the umbrella for me. So, kind of a cool guy.
Starting point is 00:37:29 Great guy. Yeah. He's a very good-looking guy. Yeah. You ever... What would you say? He's top 10 most recognizable athletes in the world? Probably, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:43 Because tennis? I don't... But I understand how ridiculous that sounds when you say it. I think a lot of them might be soccer players. Right, a lot of soccer players. Probably soccer players, LeBron and Federer. I didn't know Messi was on the home team. You don't think so?
Starting point is 00:37:59 I had no idea he had accusations of autism. Oh, yeah. Oh. He had it all. He has boula yeah. Oh. He didn't at all. He had Hasbulla shit, too. I didn't know that. Genetic disorder? Hasbulla stuff?
Starting point is 00:38:10 Short. He had that face? I know Messi has autism compilations on YouTube. Oh. I never knew. Yeah. But people love to ascribe autism to- Anyone who's good at something.
Starting point is 00:38:21 Yeah. Anyone who's good at something. Anybody who has a hobby is autistic now. You're hyper-focused on basketball. Kawhi Leonard's autistic. There's tons of people who think Kawhi Leonard. I just learned Holly from the... She was married to Hugh Hefner or whatever.
Starting point is 00:38:36 One of the three. Addison? Autism. Is that her name? Really? Addison, yeah. She has autism? They're just throwing around the autism.
Starting point is 00:38:42 If you need a new lease on life. It's ADHD and autism. No way she's autistic. Apparently diagnosed. That's the old theory. Autism is just being a man. The spectrum of autism is just men. Every man has it.
Starting point is 00:39:00 It's just the most masculine men have it a lot. Maybe. I mean, it is like a very male-heavy. Right, I mean, it's like a lot of not doing eye contact, like touch. That's not. Being a man. Not telling your kid you love him.
Starting point is 00:39:17 That's being a man. You like that. That is a big man. I love him so much. Too much. Well, you are a little feminine. I am. The least autistic guy I know. so much. Too much. Well, you are a little feminine. I am. The least autistic guy I know.
Starting point is 00:39:28 Easily. You may as well have a pussy on you. How do you know I don't? You're so unautistic, you may as well be a woman. Yeah. You've seen the breasts. How do you not know there's a pussy down there? Yeah, I guess I've never really met a girl and been like she's autistic well it looks different in women too I guess it's like totally different in girls yeah really like different symptoms
Starting point is 00:39:51 everything yeah I mean if at Holly woman's the baseline then it's just giant titties gorgeous yeah I wish I had it to be honest yeah I'm different wait wait wait wait wait she likely has asperger's that doesn't mean she has no self-diagnosing very there's no adult diagnosis i listened to a podcast and she went and got checked out and i know there's no fit but like they said oh yeah you're on the oh okay you're an adult you can just claim it if you go if you're an adult and you go and you get one of those tests for add adhd autism i'd say probably 50 over 50 percent of people are coming back with one of those things yeah there's the diagnoses are so fucking insane they're like oh we can't give out opiates anymore we'll just give out amphetamines yeah let them up on speed dude i've talked about
Starting point is 00:40:44 before when i got diagnosed with ADD, I was in fifth grade and the test was like seven hours of being like press this button when you hear a beep. And if you miss like four beeps, they're like, yeah, you're mentally challenged. Is your medicine?
Starting point is 00:40:59 And it's like, your parents were crying. Yeah, it's like, how the fuck, like, I'm fucking nine years old. How am I supposed to keep track of all these beeps? Sounds like you sucked at the beeps. I don't have ADD. I don't have ADD. It's as if you were shitty at the beeps. It sounds like you were bored.
Starting point is 00:41:14 I was bored as hell. It just goes beep and then you just press a button. That's it. Is that a little too tricky for you? It's a form of torture. It's like so fucking long and so many beeps. And your parents are like, well, we thought we did
Starting point is 00:41:27 everything right. I know. And then they put you on the max dosage of Adderall for 10 years. And then one day you're like, I think this is not helping. Are you still on it?
Starting point is 00:41:38 No. Dude, I weighed like 120 pounds when I was in like 10th grade. Because I was on Adderall for so long. That's not a bad one. I don't think that's crazy. It is.
Starting point is 00:41:48 Another vulture. They pointed at it. Yeah, we see it. Yeah, we see what you're doing. You guys see this out here? Free food. Purely untouched food. Oh, I thought you guys were done.
Starting point is 00:42:06 Oh, sausage. I saw three burger patties Oh you wanted to so bad Made people look at it Probably the meanest nickname ever Abe calling Sage Sausage Sausage I like Sage I do too
Starting point is 00:42:20 I'm saying it's a mean nickname He rolls with it Yeah I mean what's your other option? Yeah. But he's just like. And bullied by your boss? Yeah, that's one of those ones you like, if you step outside of Barstool, you're like,
Starting point is 00:42:32 wait, they call one of the best sales guys Sausage? Fair. Those are the punches. Only here. I got a Jerry problem now, because Jerry's mad that I'm not making Frank go to the stream. You just tweeted about it. Yeah. Really mad at Dan in the moment.
Starting point is 00:42:52 When I told I wasn't allowed to go to the Steelers playoff game, I begged him to go and was told no, I had to be at the stream instead. Frank shouldn't be allowed to go to the game. Oh, man. I hope they get fucking smashed. He texted me last night. He's like, if you're a dictator,
Starting point is 00:43:08 you better dictate. And I was like, what? Has he made any tweets about the Mincy thing? No, I don't think so. And said, I wasn't allowed to say it, but Mincy is.
Starting point is 00:43:22 Bullshit. I don't know. I'll have to deal with Jerry now. Frank is just a hard guy to... Yeah, you can't. This is bullshit. I don't know. I have to deal with Jerry now. Frank is just a hard guy to... Yeah, you can't. He answers to no one. He's a big alpha. And he's older than you.
Starting point is 00:43:33 Oh, yeah. He is. That's the biggest point. He just was like, yeah, I think I'm going. Yeah, he didn't really even entertain it. No, not even for a second. And I kind of knew that was coming because i i hit him up last night being like hey we're doing a stream i think you should be there and he didn't respond
Starting point is 00:43:49 i think he was just he knew he could beat me one-on-one in person he's in person yeah he's just snacking on his mcdonald's he's like yeah i'm gonna go to the game fuck don't know what to say here. He's the goat, dude. He really is. You can't. He is the immovable object. I'm going to try one more time. I'm going to have no chance.
Starting point is 00:44:15 You've got to offer tickets, I think, to future games. Think so? Some kind of leverage. You have to have some kind of... What would you offer him? Because if they win tonight and they're in the playoffs still, he's going to want him to stream again.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Yeah, shit. So what do you offer him? It's a bad precedent that he's doing right now that I can't get out of. Will he be going to the Knicks games too? He's a Knicks fan. He could just go to every single one. Jenks does have his report that he's ready to do
Starting point is 00:44:43 at some point, which I would like to see. But, yeah. Who didn't do it? You. Me. Me. The left side.
Starting point is 00:44:52 We didn't take free tickets from him. We brought him. Yeah, we brought him. I took free tickets. But he has Stu, Frank, Lenny, Kay, me, Brandon, Nick. So, good report. People are mad at me because of Jinx turning Frank into a Knicks fan. Why are you involved?
Starting point is 00:45:13 Because I let him into the hen house. He's the door. There goes Frank right now. About that time. Get him in here. Oh, God. He's in the back. Come back a little bit lighter.
Starting point is 00:45:23 Grab him when he comes out. Get him in here. He's in the pooper. He's in the back. Come back a little bit lighter. Grab him when he comes out. Get him in here. He's in the pooper. He's in the pooper. Yeah. Man's gone to the pooper. He must have won Barstool Beast to get that privilege. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:35 He's not going to win Barstool Beast this month. Who won it last month? Do we know? Oh, I don't know. April? Oh, yeah. We've got April. Mets win April, but not May.
Starting point is 00:45:45 We're going to have to vacate that like Reggie Bush's Heisman. That's your leverage. What? Barstool Beast? You're out of Barstool Beast this month. If you think that Frank gives a fuck, good chance he doesn't know what that is. I bet he does.
Starting point is 00:45:59 Oh, shit. Frank reads every email, replies all to most emails, and he'll read like Zenefits when it's people's birthday and wish them happy birthday. That's nice. Yeah. Really? Attentive, good guy.
Starting point is 00:46:13 Maybe if I buy his tickets because he's so nervous about a Rangers fan buying his tickets. What if I bought his tickets? No, he's not nervous about a Rangers fan. He's using that as a defense, which is fine, but I don't think he really cares about who sits in his seats. He wants his ass to be in that seat. You've been bested, man.
Starting point is 00:46:30 So be it. I know. I've got to hang it up. It's one man. Fleming has taken down the whole empire. He's immovable. Too much gravity. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:46:42 Now I hope the Rangers win. Here he goes. Hey, Frank. Hey, Frank. Fuck. Now I hope the Rangers win. Here he goes. Hey, Frank. Hey, Frank. Frank. Oh, damn. Kyle, attack that door. Can you guys back me up, please?
Starting point is 00:46:54 I don't know if I can. I don't. Well, it'll be a game time decision for me. Help me out. Help me out. Help me out. I'm going to hear both sides. Help me out.
Starting point is 00:47:01 I kind of want him to go. Fuck. He's coming. He's confident, too. Hey, Frank. Hey, Frank. We were talking about a little more. I just... Right there.
Starting point is 00:47:18 Right there. You're fucked. So, Frank, we were talking. You're fucked. So, Frank, we were talking about it a little more. I really think you should come to the stream tonight. Last year, I was tortured watching the Mets when I had tickets. Wait. They're not even making the playoffs this year. They're a last place team.
Starting point is 00:47:43 Wait, but the Mets didn't make the playoffs last year. I'm never good. Oh, wait. Wait, did the Mets make the playoffs last year? They made the wild card. You said that wasn't the playoffs. They fucked it up. I'm not giving up game seven seconds.
Starting point is 00:47:59 I don't want a Ranger fan. All right, what if I bought the tickets off of you? So that way no one sits in the seats. I want to be there. See? He's got a point. He can't do anything. No point.
Starting point is 00:48:12 I mean, I'm taking Glennie. That's good. Devils have played. You got season tickets, right? I'm a season ticket holder. How many games did you go to this year? 32. Out of, what, 41 total?
Starting point is 00:48:25 Yeah, at least. I went to at least 30. I might have missed a game here or there being at Ruff and Rowdy. You definitely wouldn't miss a game seven. I would not miss a game seven. So you would want to be there regardless of a loss. Yes. You want to be there for the moment.
Starting point is 00:48:39 What if I said you can't come to Ruff and Rowdy? Oh, come on now. I found something. No, I on now. I found something. No, I'm not actually going to say it. I'm just... What if Dan buys your season tickets
Starting point is 00:48:49 for next year? Fuck, Brandon. Jesus Christ. I mean, I... I'm not even inching up this negotiation at all. I'm paying like a couple hundred a month
Starting point is 00:48:59 for two seats. That's the parking cost. I can afford that. All right. Have fun at the game. See's a parking test. I can't afford that. All right. Have fun at the game. See, Jerry's pissed. I don't have a fight. There's nothing I can do to this man.
Starting point is 00:49:13 See that Jerry's pissed, Frank? I asked you guys to pack me up. You guys gave me nothing. How can we? We have nothing. It's game seven. Right. It's game seven against the Rags.
Starting point is 00:49:23 Right. But that's when people want to see the stream. We could have someone to film reactions. I could try to set up my camera somehow. Okay. Invested. All right. Thank you, Frank.
Starting point is 00:49:38 Have fun at the game. Frank wins. I need this The Mets The Mets Are the worst team In the National League No you don't get to
Starting point is 00:49:48 Rant about the Mets If we're being honest Dave says It's The way better stream Is actually Borelli vs. Glenn Is Frankie here though
Starting point is 00:49:57 I think he's got a classic Right Borelli hates the Rangers Way more than The Devils Is the stream At Borelli's Frank was going through it
Starting point is 00:50:04 Dan I folded He helped himself Through a couple In his voice More than time works the devils. Is the stream at Borelli's? Frank was going through it. The stream's here. Dan, I folded. He helped himself to a couple of points. Pain in his voice. You know, he got me. There's nothing I can do. The rough and rowdy thing was. Yeah, that got him pretty good.
Starting point is 00:50:14 I didn't know he loved it that much. Yeah, he loves it. Oh, dude. He just. Favorite. He goes and he says, are you ready to get rough and rowdy? He bangs a couple ring girls. Right.
Starting point is 00:50:22 Yeah. Apply the pressure there. You could. I could have But I don't have it in me I'm soft Weak He just sat right
Starting point is 00:50:29 You see It was very funny Yeah Right past it I'm not missing a game seven The way he said I want to be there He wasn't negotiating
Starting point is 00:50:41 No I want to be there I want to be there Fuck alright Grown negotiating. No. I want to be there. I want to be there. Grown man making grown man moves. We could all use a little bit of that. Actually, yeah. Is Frankie at a classic right now? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:50:56 He's filling in for me. What? Filling in for you? Oh, yeah. I was out there all week. Frankie is? Well, yeah. We swapped Sorry did I say something wrong? No no no That's not the most wrong thing we've heard today
Starting point is 00:51:14 Definitely not Zod did you weigh in? KB if I speak If I speak As Jose Mourinho says If I speak Yeah Chill chill
Starting point is 00:51:28 Chill chill chill chill chill I forget what Mourinho said Can you spin the wheel TJ Because I gotta go do an interview Oh You haven't made a shot in like two weeks Shut the fuck up He did he made one on Friday
Starting point is 00:51:39 You shut the fuck up He made one on Friday I just saw Frank back in Oh my god this wheel is Oh what the fuck Oh my god We need on Friday. I just saw Frank back in the morning. Oh, my God. This wheel is. Oh, what the fuck? Oh, my God. Are we adding a, I thought we were adding a bubble gum forehead or some shit. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:53 Red forehead. Oh, and you got to call a psychic. Yeah, I do. You want to call a psychic? I do. What? As Brandon Walker. What?
Starting point is 00:52:00 You added that. That wasn't part of it. No, I'm going to do it as you. I want to see when you're going to die. That'll be so sick. I got to find a good psychic. If anyone has a good psychic, wants to give it to TJ. I hope nobody has a good psychic.
Starting point is 00:52:16 Who would have a good psychic? People know that they're just going to tell you that you're going to live a long time, so you keep on coming back to the psychic. This is a good thing for you, Brandon. This isn't me. This is him being me. Yeah. Well, a good psychic will know. Actually, Rowan, I might need you to tap in on the voice. This is a good thing for you, Brandon. This isn't me. This is him being me. Yeah. Well, a good psychic will know.
Starting point is 00:52:26 Actually, Rowan, I might need you to tap in on the voice. I'll write a script. All right, say less. Can we just book O's again? That's not a psychic. A mentalist. Not a psychic. It's a slap in the face to both those careers.
Starting point is 00:52:39 Yeah. See some pretty cool tricks. That is true. Yeah. I was watching some O's videos this weekend. Love that guy. Jesus, boys. That is true. Yeah. I was watching some of those videos this weekend. Love that guy. Jesus, boys. This is bad.
Starting point is 00:52:49 Spin the wheel real quick. Wait, we can't go 0 for as a show. No one's made. Am I adding big red forehead? Oh, my God. Yeah, big red forehead. You can add it. Or add it when we wheel reset.
Starting point is 00:53:00 We went 0 for. Oh, no one made one. Oh, no. One more sheet. One. Yeah. Oh! I don't know if we have it in us to do that again.
Starting point is 00:53:15 We spin for the complimenter and the complimentee. Tomorrow we'll do compliment minute. Oh, very close. Tomorrow we'll do a full compliment minute show. This is going to be torture. We got to figure out who's complimenting who. Did we do the third ad? No, I'm just leaving.
Starting point is 00:53:29 You guys keep yakking. Everyone's throwing their papers. Oh, yeah. What's the high noon ad? Rowan's got it in the back of his head. New copy. Oh. I have one paper left.
Starting point is 00:53:37 Let's see if it's on here. You don't have to spend now. We'll do it tomorrow. Why don't we find out who's going to let him agonize for 24 hours? Oh, you want to see? All right. Yeah, yeah. That's fine.
Starting point is 00:53:46 This is complimenter. Or complimentee. Who is this? Wait. How did we do it last time? I think it was every... Everyone went. Everybody's going to have to compliment me again.
Starting point is 00:53:57 I'll be god damn. No, we did it. You have to compliment. The first person compliments the next person and it goes in a circle until everyone's done. The last person will compliment you. Brandon goes first. We'll see if it sneaks back around. So then you're complimenting
Starting point is 00:54:14 this person. Nice. That would be fucking easy. Complimenting Roan. Compared to who? Tell me who the second hardest person to compliment would be so we don't hurt feelings.
Starting point is 00:54:36 Spin it again? We're doing the order now? Yeah. That's why I was saying we should do it tomorrow, but let's do it now, I guess. The last time we did it, it was like,
Starting point is 00:54:44 I think we pick the person and then you go, and then we spin. Oh, okay, so Brandon will start it with complimenting Roan, and then we'll spin again. It's off. Yeah, correct. Got it. Oh, my God. The last person will have to compliment me. We'll see if we have enough time.
Starting point is 00:54:59 We'll see if we have enough time. Y'all know what? It does take so long. Sucks that you went first. Again. What you doing, boy? It's all good. I'll put it in minutes. It sucks. This is brutal.
Starting point is 00:55:14 What can we talk about while boss is out? Please. So... I saw some blueprints for the new New York office. Yeah. There's a new New York office? Oh, yeah. What you stepping in? That's cool.
Starting point is 00:55:42 Don't worry about it. Don't worry about it, bro. But that shit looks fucking fly, bro. Swimming pool. Cold tub. Cold tub. Oh, come on. Nice ass cold punch tub.
Starting point is 00:55:53 Private chef. Massage tables. Fuck. Out back, out the ass crack. That ain't right, man. No. That's fucking how it's supposed to be, man. Rowan, have you found a house in Chicago yet?
Starting point is 00:56:08 No, I'm going to be homeless out there. I heard there's a, you kind of have a better leg up on the whole society if you're the first one up. The morning first one out. Early bird gets the worm and all that. And all that. You got any friends that's talking a British accent to be funny, Brandon? I don't have any friends. My son does it, and he does it not to be funny.
Starting point is 00:56:33 He just does it. I believe he wants to be British. Do you have a good accent? He was Irish all week last week. Madonna was British for a while. She was. Who was Lohan? Lohan was Arabic.
Starting point is 00:56:44 Oh, yeah. Lohan was Arabic? Lohan was Arabic. Oh yeah. Lohan was Arabic? Lohan was Arabic? It was a decent run too. Middle Eastern accent. No, Lohan did. She attempted to speak in Arabic and all the people who did speak were like, yeah, that was nothing. There is a video.
Starting point is 00:56:58 Vincy was black for a hot second. Unacceptable behavior by him. Truly. That's Hilaria Baldwin. She was doing Spanish accent and her name's
Starting point is 00:57:27 actually just Hillary and she's just from like Massachusetts oh yeah she did that for years right she still does it she still does it
Starting point is 00:57:33 and there's old videos of her just talking completely normal yeah was Elizabeth Warren the one who was like one two hundredth Native American
Starting point is 00:57:41 and she was like I'm Native American Trump called her Pocahontas yeah she got into college because of that or something or she did something 200th Native American. And she was like, I'm Native American. Trump called her Pocahontas. She got into college because of that or something? Or she did something because of it.
Starting point is 00:57:54 I'm on Truth Social and I got bombed the other night. And then a couple days ago, my wife was like, what is this book of letters that Trump has written during his presidency? I just got a big-ass coffee table book of all the letters that he wrote. It's kind of fucking sick. Is it sick? That's a good coffee table book. It's kind of fucking sick, dude. It's just interesting in a funny way.
Starting point is 00:58:12 Brandon, did you break your whole shit? Yeah. Yeah. No, no, my mic stand's been on life support for a while, and they just keep, like, barely fixing it, and now it's just completely broken, so I'm just going to hold it like this. You could just switch seats.
Starting point is 00:58:26 I could switch seats, couldn't I? Bro, you know some people are moving to Chicago this month for solely. I'm going, my closing day is June 19th. I hope to be out there by July 1st. Why would it take 11 days for you to get out there? 12 days. Kids got to finish school.
Starting point is 00:58:42 Got to have the moving van. You got to load the stage coaches is definitely going to do an instagram ad for free movers or something yeah i'm totally trying to do that shit yeah i sure am i'm gonna i'm gonna cut every corner i can my god frankie frankie versus glennie will happen on the stream tonight frankie is in town oh great um and then i just was like, it's Frank. Because now I just told Glennie he's going to the game, and then I said, no, you're not going to the game.
Starting point is 00:59:10 So he's sad. And I was like, blame Frank. He started all this. And now the dog is yelling at me, too. So I got Frank and the dog yelling at me. Why is the dog yelling at you? I don't know. Because he doesn't like the injustice of Frank going to the game.
Starting point is 00:59:23 So I got Frankie and the dog up my ass. Quite a day for me. He's not on Frank's side. No, he he doesn't like the injustice of Frank going to the game. So I got Frankie and the dog up my ass. So he's on a day for me. He's on Frank's side. No, he hates that I'm not being stronger on Frank. They have a longstanding rivalry. Oh, Snide. Oh, my God. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:39 What was Snidegate? Don't be Snide. It was during Jenga or one of the games. Cornhole, right? Cornhole. It got be snide. It was during Jenga or one of the games. Cornhole, right? Cornhole. It got over the top. It got heated. That's why I don't like you, Nate.
Starting point is 00:59:52 You always have something snide to say. What's those games? Yeah, that was fun. We did those whole things for a while. Was that a colossal failure or what happened with that? I thought it was good. Yeah, I thought a lot of people watched those. Might be coming back.
Starting point is 01:00:06 It might be. In some... Oh, that's right. Some state. Right. Last time we were in there playing, it was like a Jenga tournament
Starting point is 01:00:16 and I was pretty pregnant and me and my teammate won and they got really excited and they threw me up on their shoulder. And I was like... I was so paranoid they squished my baby and I went to the hospital. Oh my God. Went to the hospital. And they're like, like on my and i was like i was so paranoid they squished my
Starting point is 01:00:25 baby i went to the hospital oh my god to the hospital after and they're like what happened and i was like who's a jenga game at work and yeah i was like so paranoid and they're like we've seen a lot of this they're like you're completely fine you're just insane yeah i feel like it happened a lot though but people getting really like just like those happened those were like daily oh yeah that was every day it was like i was in the booth and i was just like those happened. Those were like daily. Oh, yeah. That was every day. It was like I was in the booth and I was just like, Nick, you have six hours. I was like, yeah, like I was there. There was a lot of there was a lot of forgettable matches.
Starting point is 01:00:54 Matt Hardy versus Eric Escobar. Nine in Rochester. Right. That was forgettable. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I was quite I was actually doing an interesting phase for Matt Hardy. That's when he was in his version 1.0.
Starting point is 01:01:06 Who won that? Almost certainly Matt Hardy. Yeah. He's doing a goddamn thing where he's looked up all these obscure facts about WWE, and he's just dropping one every time. It's not true. I'm just a bigger fan than you. And I've been trumping you left and right.
Starting point is 01:01:22 You need a show, bro. I know. I'm the wrestling guy at Barstool. You could make it fun. You dropped something the other day that you thought you were, oh, the Fandango thing, charting 11th on the British charts. I knew that. Didn't fucking know that.
Starting point is 01:01:34 And what's your chart in the U.S. then? I didn't. Oh, 22? God damn it. Have you been in his notebook or what? That's not in his notebook. But he doesn't know it. I don't know you don't know it.
Starting point is 01:01:48 I like you saving it for hour two, though. Oh, yeah. What's that thing simmer? I didn't fucking know it. I don't know if it charted. I think it charted about 22, 24 in the US. I don't think it charted. I don't think it did.
Starting point is 01:02:01 All right. Whatever. How was that hamburger? It was great Really? I'm gonna snack on it I'm definitely gonna have one I want those ribs
Starting point is 01:02:09 Joey left any There's more and more getting taken Shrimp out there is delicious You bastard I hope Billy enjoys his quad burger His full pounder Four quarter pounders Stacked on top of each other
Starting point is 01:02:23 The bun, the cheese And and the burger is all burger I went to a fundraiser on Friday night in Chicago And they had like a Not a silent auction where you hold up a thing And there was Taylor Swift tickets Up for auction And 85 grand For Taylor Swift
Starting point is 01:02:41 Are you already part of society in Chicago? Yeah I hit you go out there and you got to a fundraiser That looks fun for Taylor Swift. Are you already part of society in Chicago? Yeah, it sounds like you're just like a member of the community. I hate to go out there and you get to a fundraiser. That looks fun. We should check it out while we're in town. I have family out there, and so they're like, come with. They're rich.
Starting point is 01:02:54 Integrated in the community. They do okay? They do okay. $85,000 for a Taylor Swift ticket. Yeah, $85,000. And that's just like the sit in the stands maybe? To clarify, it was for a suite. But still.
Starting point is 01:03:08 You see the Kelly Keeg suite about that suite of the chief's owner's daughter's friends who were there at the concert? That was insane. Those bedazzled cups. It looked pretty fucking insane. It looked pretty sweet. It looked pretty great. How do you get a friend like that?
Starting point is 01:03:21 That's what I... And they all wrote their names on the shirt, but all I could think is, like, there's definitely a couple girls on this shirt that they don't like, that not everybody likes, and you have to wear that shirt forever with everybody's name on it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:31 I throw it out. Cookies, like, with song titles on them and shit. It looked awesome. It looked... Someone definitely got in trouble for eating the cookies that they were supposed to be decorative. For touching any of the decorations, yes. 100% looking up where it charted.
Starting point is 01:03:46 Hmm. It's not that big of a deal where it charted anyway. It's pretty impressive, nonetheless. Sass, you got a bunch of junk in your wallet, bro. Yeah, I know. That's an old man's wallet. Is this? Yeah, it looks like a wallet of somebody who's 35 and pays a lot of bills.
Starting point is 01:04:03 I pay a lot of bills. Very late. Dude, I know. Fucking emailing my landlord at 2 in the morning last night being like, how do I pay rent? Because I've never paid rent here. In the city. I've never paid rent at this place. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:19 Oh, yeah. It's your first month. Yeah. Probably just like a portal. What is it, Zell? Dude, they sent your first month. Yeah. Probably just like a portal. What is it, Zelle? Dude, they were like, they sent me like an invoice or a bill, whatever, for the rent. And then it was like an option to print it out and write your email on it and send that with the check so in future months you can do the e-bill. And I was like, there's got to be an easier way to do the e-bill than me mailing in
Starting point is 01:04:45 what my email address is. Like I could just tell them, I could just call and be like, hey, this is my email address. I didn't follow all that. You always have the most complicated situation. I don't understand. I don't know, dude.
Starting point is 01:04:57 Shit is so easy for me to pay my rent. It's literally an automatic payment. Yeah. Never have to do it. I used to have to send in physical mail, which was weird. It's so annoying when they have to do that. Someone's cheating the law if you're doing some shit like that.
Starting point is 01:05:08 There was in my one apartment in Queens I fucked it up a couple times and the guy was like if you don't have it to me in the next five hours blah blah. So I'd have to take the train into the city. I'd have to bring it to his house. Yeah that's what I did in my old apartment. I would have to bring it up to Upper West Side every single month.
Starting point is 01:05:24 I had to take it to his fucking mansion. Yeah. I'd be like old apartment. I would have to bring it up to Upper West Side every single month. I'd have to take it to his fucking mansion. Yeah. Like, yes. I'd be like, this is for Bruce. Some dude. And some dude would be like, I will give it to Bruce. Yeah, like a pack of dudes just waiting there. Alfred?
Starting point is 01:05:37 Yeah. Is he Bruce Wayne? Yeah. I keep like four months in a row now. I have my old rent written on the whiteboard, so every month I look over, I'm like, that's the amount I owe. And I forgot it got raised 200 bucks, and like four months in a row now I've fucked it up.
Starting point is 01:05:51 And she has to think I'm like fucking with her at this point that I keep, and I just did it again. You don't really have to pay it on time. No. Anything. I mean, your credit, sometimes I ding your credit, though. True, I don't have a credit card. That shit is whack, but you will probably need it once you move to Chicago and have to buy a house with a spiral staircase or on a body of water.
Starting point is 01:06:12 I'm panicking. I'm just leaving it up to fate. If we get the house, I'm just going to roll with it. You got to. Even though it seems like a very dumb. You're going to fall down the stairs. Oh, it's going to be terrible. What seems dumb about it?
Starting point is 01:06:23 The stairs are the biggest problem? No, the whole place is just fucking weird. It sounds like you don't even like your home. I like the neighborhood. She's all block party-ish. I did.
Starting point is 01:06:39 She wants to make brownies for all the kids on the block. Yeah. Why don't you start with making brownies for us? Yeah, we could start there. Try it on us. There's already a mom that does that here. Oh, yeah. Oh, she's got banana pudding cookies.
Starting point is 01:06:51 They're great. They're so good. You have one? There was only two left when I went into the kitchen. She has some bonus ones on her desk. Fuck her. She just skedaddled. Yeah, they're amazing.
Starting point is 01:06:59 They're really good. Do you guys sit on the plane? Where did they come up with that shit? Oh, yeah. What was that? Sit peeing down. I do the, like, press my forehead. That's what they said, brother.
Starting point is 01:07:12 Watch the clip. Sit peeing down? There's no space to sit, is there? I don't know. I don't know how I would even sit. Our new Mean Girls clip, they said they heard that it's common for men to sit and pee on planes. I've never heard that. Maybe.
Starting point is 01:07:26 I'm not – maybe. Have any of you? I do what you just said. I put my entire body up against the wall. Guys sit peeing down on airplanes. Just piss everywhere. What? Yeah, guys most of the time sit peeing down on airplanes.
Starting point is 01:07:37 Can they just, like, tuck it? Well, you know guys can sit peeing down. Yeah. Why does she keep saying it? Well, I think the turbulence or something like probably makes it hard to aim i told you that uh this girl texted it to me and then i decided i would research it of course you would i feel like you always use like anecdotal things as like a like a broad statement one person told you that they see sitting down and she's like did you did you know
Starting point is 01:08:01 guys pee sitting down and i'm like one person told no someone commented on something like this blonde somehow makes us all think that she studied every time there's some phone thugs in harmony and i was like wait a second she's really good at that um i get it it's when you lose balance it's hard to up. But when have guys ever cared that they're peeing everywhere? Especially in public. I can't even stand up in one of those. So you do sit and pee? What I do is I hunch and I
Starting point is 01:08:35 lean my knees against it and I lean forward. It's a weird looking thing. Dick too big. Dick too big for the damn plane. I'm 6'5". The ceiling in there is it's not high. No. As a guy who sits down
Starting point is 01:08:52 and pees fairly regularly, especially at home, I always stand up and pee on the train or the plane. It's a little bit of freedom. Yeah. A little danger. Now, peeing on a plane... I've peed on a plane twice in my life. You're scared of everything airport related, right? And peeing on a plane you peed on a plane twice in my life you're scared of everything airport related right and peeing on a plane's got to be anxiety inducing no because then i get to walk past the flight attendants because i just stare at the flight attendants
Starting point is 01:09:13 when i'm on the plane to make sure they're not nervous okay and uh so i get to go up there and just like really get their aura yeah those women don't fear death, though. Amen. They're like the bravest souls that we have in our country. Like, even if it is really dangerous, they're like laughing and chewing gum and like talking about like the affair they're going to have and whatever. The affairs are crazy. Every one of them will.
Starting point is 01:09:38 We have really bad turbulence. There's not one who won't. United Atlanta, huh? Fucking a rapper. Decatur. Adamsville. What do you think is harder? Peeing on a plane with a little bit of turbulence
Starting point is 01:09:51 or peeing with the lights off? If you're peeing with lights off, I don't think you care. I think you accept the risk. I think the turbulence, if you lean on the wall a little bit, if you can get a steadying force on the wall, you'll steady your whole apparatus.
Starting point is 01:10:08 We hit a really bad landing yesterday, and the guy behind me was dry heaving into the—he was like— It was so bad, my eyes were starting to roll in my head. He was making that sound? Yeah. You sure he just didn't say a no-no word? Yeah. It's like you know what he did you ever watch those
Starting point is 01:10:29 old G.I. Joe voiceover videos yes remember pork chop sandwiches that was like the first internet video I've ever seen
Starting point is 01:10:35 where the guy's like pork chop sandwiches god I loved those that's a deep cut I guess anyway I'm having spells today where I can't open my eyes Deep cut, I guess. Anyway. I'm having spells today where I can't open my eyes.
Starting point is 01:10:51 Is that a bad sign? Dude, I... Oh, you have the COVID pink eye. God damn it. No, I don't. There's a COVID pink eye? He was here last week. Just so you know. There's COVID pink eye.
Starting point is 01:11:01 Guys, I think I've had COVID for two weeks straight. Yeah. I feel so bad right now. You sound nervous. It started at the beginning of Prick Central. I couldn't open my eyes for about four seconds. I'm so anxious right now. I think because I stopped weed. Really?
Starting point is 01:11:16 Yeah. Or is it because of that big-ass zin in your pocket that's bleeding into your skin? Like that guy that was running away from the cops with acid. I'm nervous right now. I gotta go to the doctor. What the fuck is the doctor gonna tell you? You're leaving for Iceland tomorrow.
Starting point is 01:11:31 You're just gonna take it to those indigenous people up there and wipe them out like thieves. You're gonna wipe out a country. I'm convincing myself that being out there will help. I think it will. Are you able to drink still and stuff? Not will. Are you able to drink still and stuff, or not really? What?
Starting point is 01:11:46 Are you able to drink still and stuff, or not really? I'm going to get destroyed. Drink regardless. No, you'll be fine. You've been abusing your body for quite some time. I'm guessing not. That's a heavy drinking culture, or no? I think.
Starting point is 01:11:58 I don't think they drink. They don't drink at all during. Francis told me they don't drink at all during the week, but on the weekends they black out from Friday, and then they don't sleep because it doesn't get dark. So they stay awake, and then they go straight back to the bars on Saturday when they open up again.
Starting point is 01:12:16 Okay. Their pineal glands are fucked up more than Brandon's is. With your dumbass gland. So help me God if you give me COVID pink eye. I don't have COVID pink eye. Why can't you open your eyes? I had pink eye last week. I don't know.
Starting point is 01:12:28 It's been like two different times today where I couldn't open my eyes. You're going to wake up tomorrow and your eyes are just going to be red. Zone shut. I don't have COVID pink eye. Broden, you saw mine last week. I was wearing glasses all last week on this show. So you gave me COVID pink eye. Probably, dude, but I just can't miss work anymore.
Starting point is 01:12:48 Nick was patient zero like four weeks ago. I was the sickest human on earth during the case race. I've been sick since the case race. Whatever you gave me is just tearing through my system. I beat it in like two days. You texted, yeah, I texted you. But you're just the unhealthiest. Me and you were both sick.
Starting point is 01:13:06 We were both. And I got through it like that. You didn't. You had it for like over a week. Over a week. Dude, you had it from Monday, and then when we were in Austin on Friday, you were telling me that you were waking up soaked in sweat and having to change shirts.
Starting point is 01:13:18 That's because of my alcohol abuse. No, that's because of alcohol abuse. No, that's from being sick. I never got a fucking punk in my eye. I probably had some different shit. What was that noise? I'm struggling, man. And you got a lot of work to do over the next couple days.
Starting point is 01:13:38 When Tyler was sending me my schedule. Wait, can you get on a plane and go to Iceland if you're this sick? The thing is, I'm not this sick. I'm sick enough to be not having a good time right now, but I'm not sick enough to be staying home from work and not going to this Iceland trip
Starting point is 01:13:56 that I've had planned for months. You're going to be hiking and stuff, right? Out in nature? We're not going to be doing too much hiking. We're going to be doing a lot of fishing. Oh, that'll be... Are you going up toward the Arctic Circle? No, we're not going that far north.
Starting point is 01:14:11 You're staying in one spot. We're moving around every day. I think it's to brown trout. I think they have some of the biggest brown trout in the world there. I don't think we can go that far north because it's still early in the season.
Starting point is 01:14:28 The roads are still frozen. Some of the roads are still fucked. You'll still get to see the cool volcanic terrain, though. Yeah. I heard the Blue Lagoon, though, it might be a little bit overrated, but there are similar places to the Blue Lagoon that are nicer and less expensive.
Starting point is 01:14:41 Yeah. Is that true? Yeah. They say don't get your hair wet. Did you see that? Yeah, or it will ruin your bathing suits and shit. It fucks up your hair for weeks afterwards. It's like this crazy hair that you can't fix.
Starting point is 01:14:52 That's awesome, though. You should do that. Yeah. It might be good on you. It might be good. Yeah. Hat guy. Yeah, they...
Starting point is 01:14:57 I don't think we're going to do the Blue Lagoon, dude. I looked it up. It's like $80 to $100 depending on the time of day per person. And then the beers are like $15. And you just pay it to get into this? To get in. There's like a hotel there, I think, too, that some people stay at. There's like a resort.
Starting point is 01:15:16 Do you have your hotels booked? They're camping. Oh, you're camping. Camping in Iceland. That's awesome. What I'm worried about, though. I'd be worried about that. You should probably worry about that. You don't know what's camping. Camping in Iceland, that's awesome. What I'm worried about, though, I'd be worried about that. You should probably worry about that. It's a whole other country.
Starting point is 01:15:27 You don't know what's camping. So the red eye, not a red eye. You bet on the red eye. The red eye, it's, I fly out at 8 p.m., it's like a four and a half
Starting point is 01:15:36 hour flight. You're going to get there at like six in the morning? Wait, to Iceland? Yeah. It's four and a half hours? It's like,
Starting point is 01:15:43 it says it's five and a half, it's going to be four and a half. It's never the full time. It's always like 45 minutes to Iceland? Yeah. It's four and a half hours? It's like, it says it's five and a half. It's going to be four and a half. It's never the full time. It's always like 45 minutes to an hour shorter. And, dude, that's not enough time for a red eye. What's the time difference? I'm assuming four or five hours, right? Like London's five hours ahead.
Starting point is 01:15:59 Yeah, it's probably close to that. Take off at 8 a.m. and get there at 8 p.m. Why don't you guys swing on over to Iceland after London? All right. You can camp with them don't you guys swing on over to Iceland after London Alright Camp with them? Would you guys camp with Sass? Kyle's gotta go to the embassy right now Would it be just you then? Alone?
Starting point is 01:16:13 I think Tommy Smokes is in the batter's box What are you guys going to London for? They need man on the street for the coronation man Oh damn, that'll be cool They need it Kyle's just gonna get drunk off some British beers and disappear anyway That'll be cool. They need it. Kyle's just going to get drunk off some British beers and disappear anyway. He's going to be slurring his words.
Starting point is 01:16:31 That's somebody else's job now. You going to meet up with troops? Honor the days. Yeah, you're not even going to... I think you'd kill it out. You've got to do your British slang out there. Yeah, you've got to. Or pick up some new shit. Repopulate your brain with new slang.
Starting point is 01:16:46 I was asking, is Troops going to meet up with you? We'll reach out. We reached out to him, and I guess Patty's hurt. Oh. Yeah, and he's on a scooter. Think? He's not going to meet up with you guys? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:16:59 No way they're meeting up. You go to a random city, and someone who you know, who you don't hang out with ever do you still hit them up? No. People do that. I got dinner with a guy I haven't seen in eight years. I want to be in New York. We never hung out anyway. I never do that.
Starting point is 01:17:16 It's a good thought. Be like oh if you're ever in New York hit me up. But it's tough to bring to fruition. I got a text from a random number that was my home area code. I was like, hey, I'm in New York. Let's grab some drinks. And I responded back, about fucking time.
Starting point is 01:17:32 Were you just pulling up like, I don't know who this is going to be? I don't have a clue. It's insane. No, no, this is another person. I knew I had his number. This text I got yesterday. So I'm going to go meet up with them tonight.
Starting point is 01:17:43 New York tradition. Don't be off. You have to. How are you going to figure meet up with them tonight. New York tradition. Yeah, you have to. How are you going to figure out who it is? Show up. I saved the name as something and then go to Snapchat
Starting point is 01:17:51 and look at my contacts. What? It'll reveal their Snapchat name and you won't be able to tell. What if they have like a weird Snapchat name?
Starting point is 01:18:04 What if it's not their name? Yeah, that could be the case. You just gotta show up fierce. You gotta commit a full night to them. But I could have said, who's this? I could have. No, it's painful to say who's this. This sounds like the start of a really good meet-cute.
Starting point is 01:18:19 Dude, I say, who's this? Or you're gonna die. I feel like 90% of the time that you say, who's this? They reply with like, ha, ha, ha. What is the, you wish you knew. Text me the last four digits because I memorize it a lot. Seriously? Sixth grade, yeah.
Starting point is 01:18:35 I have all of your guys' numbers memorized. Just in case of emergency. Remember your home phone? Yeah. I have the last four digits of both of your numbers memorized. No, you don't. Yes, I do. You can say it. You want me to say it? Wait, what? I don't believe you do. I have the last four digits of both of your numbers memorized. No, you don't. Yes, I do. You can say it.
Starting point is 01:18:47 You want me to say it? Wait, what? I don't believe you do. I have 811. Oh, fuck. Want me to say yours? Oh, really? Those are the most identifying numbers.
Starting point is 01:18:58 What? I don't have contacts on my laptop. Oh. Yeah. What do you fancy about, Brandon? I don't know. Dude, dude. It's this fucking disease that we're going through right now.
Starting point is 01:19:14 I don't know. There's a worm in your brain. It is strong. I'm a little foggy today. Dude, you're sick. We're all sick. We've all been sick. You are sick.
Starting point is 01:19:23 I'm not sick. Brandon, you're going to wake up tomorrow. Your migraine is's gonna be the worst migraine you've ever experienced in your life never once said you had a migraine this whole time i've had a headache for two weeks straight bullshit you just went through i went through an entire bottle of advil when i was in austin and that was in one day he was trying to kill himself i was doing the ad on pick central i was i was welcoming people to the show And my eyes shut And I couldn't open them
Starting point is 01:19:48 And I couldn't get it back Your eyelids aren't strong enough I passed the sheet to Ev And I said hey you gotta read this I don't understand what's happening Your eyes just shut That would freak the fuck out That's a scary thing.
Starting point is 01:20:05 This happened to me before. I was out at a party. It was like the Marine Corps birthday here, so I was out at some big Marine Corps steak dinner, and I was like, man, I said to the guy next to me, I feel crazy, but my eyelids feel like garage doors shutting, and I cannot keep them open no matter what I do. I was like, this is super weird.
Starting point is 01:20:20 And all night long, my eyes kept shutting, and I wasn't even that drunk. I was like, something's like... Were you just tired? No, well, so the next day, This is super weird. And all night long, my eyes kept shutting. And I wasn't even that drunk. I was like, something's like. Were you just tired? No. Well, so the next day, I was supposed to drive all the way out to Ohio for some family thing. And I get, I'm on the Cross Bronx Expressway or whatever.
Starting point is 01:20:37 And my eyes, I'm driving just shut. I like could not. I was like this. I have pictures of it that I think I tweeted out where I like had to pull over to the driving and you couldn't see so you started taking pictures well no so i pulled over on the side of like on the emergency side and i put on my blinkers and i was like i literally can't with my blinkers on i drove two miles an hour to the bronx va i had to leave my car out front and i was like can someone help me i like can't see and it was uva it's your eyeballs swell and it makes your eyes shut it's like some crazy
Starting point is 01:21:06 random thing how did you what happened what did you do i had to wear it was like it became really painful too they give you like three different kinds of eye drops and you have to wear like i was oh was that when you're a big glasses yes i had to wear like the big crazy sunglasses for like a week and a half before it finally went away but like my eyes just is it contagious not open it was crazy. That sounds bad. Imagine Sass going on this picturesque vacation and Brandon,
Starting point is 01:21:31 you can't open your eyes. Brandon, you bastard. It was terrible. It's like a Back to the Future thing. Mints messing up is erasing me. We're going to start to try and play Johnny B. Goode on the guitar. I'm going to go to shit. I don't feel so good.
Starting point is 01:21:54 Disappear into thin air. You know that new word you've been looking for? I think I found it. Listen to this. This is the future. Oh, gross. All right. All right. Should we call it?
Starting point is 01:22:09 Let's call it. One more ad. What's that ad, Rome? I can't see it. I don't know it off top. Kate, you've got to have it in your hands. I don't know if they want me to do it. They must want you to do it.
Starting point is 01:22:18 Just because you've talked to me before? Yeah. It's out of the room. I don't know if they want a prego read and a booze read. Oh. If you are a tequila lover who was never satisfied with malt hard seltzer offerings, you are going to love New High Noon Tequila Seltzer. It's a premium hard seltzer made with real tequila and real juice.
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Starting point is 01:23:20 That's a really nice one that you're going to enjoy. High noon tequila seltzer is great for outdoors, especially around the pool, lake, beach, golf, or tailgating. And you can look for them on Drizzly or at your local convenience or liquor store or visit highnoonspirits.com to find some near you.
Starting point is 01:23:38 Neagle's got a lot better run. Yeah. And Kate. Yes. How awesome was that draft? I mean, the Steelers got better. They got a lot better. Every team got better, I'd imagine. Except for the Lions. Every team get worse.
Starting point is 01:23:49 The Lions. The Lions might have. What happened? Got rid of their running back and then drafted another running back a little bit high. Too high. Lions actually, I think, had a decent draft. They just did it kind of out of order. They got a head and hooker, too, didn't they?
Starting point is 01:24:03 They did. Brian Branch. Wow. That tight end from Michigan. It's a little out of order. They got Hennon Hooker too, didn't they? They did. Brian Branch. Wow. That tight end from Michigan. It's a little out of order. Yeah. It's a good draft. It's a little bit out of order.
Starting point is 01:24:14 Speaking of out of order. You guys have an episode coming out? Oh, a new one? No. You don't have an episode coming out this month? Oh, yeah, this month. I don't know when. I saw a clip and it was very good.
Starting point is 01:24:27 Yeah. They were working on it hard. Pavs, Tyler, Owen, in the lab. You killed that. You were meant to play that role. The one that we did last week? Thank you. That one was funny.
Starting point is 01:24:41 Still is. Still fucking is. It's going to be a classic. It aged funny. Yeah. Still is. Still fucking is. It's going to be a classic. It aged well. Yeah. That's going to be a freaking classic. Where the hell's Brandon going? Get his eyes propped.
Starting point is 01:24:55 Propped open? Tape his eyes open? He's going to be coming in and doing next show like Clockwork Orange. Got the jaws of life on him. Wait, is he just leaving? Who the hell? What is he doing? Yeah, why are you going?
Starting point is 01:25:07 Weirdo. Did he just get up and leave? Did he think that we were going to notice? Where the hell are you going? Yeah, where are you going? Going home. Going home? It's 2 o'clock on a Monday.
Starting point is 01:25:19 That's correct. Brandon, you can do anything today. This is your day. That's a good point. You can do is your day. That's a good point. You can do anything you want. That's a great point. Why are you going home so early? A girl has a softball game that got rained out on Friday.
Starting point is 01:25:32 Oh, okay. Four o'clock. Got to be on the 239 train. Any other questions? What was that? No, what was that? Too many noises, man. Four o'clock softball game that you have to be at?
Starting point is 01:25:45 That's my daughter. I do support that. Thank you. I'm just looking for... Okay, I support that. Josh said the show was ending or else I wouldn't have walked out. We had to do this big-ass ad. What time's the Sixers game? 7.30. Stream tonight. So,
Starting point is 01:26:01 you know, check it out. Let's go to the game. Huh? Let's go to the game. Huh? Let's go to the game. Boston? You think I could make it on time? And Boston. I'm not on the freaking flyer. They did me like Nick at the NFL Draft show.
Starting point is 01:26:13 They got Max and Hank. Oh, man. Jeez. EMT just tries to make Max look like an idiot, dude. He's smarter than all the dudes on that show. You just need a freaking whipping boy to fall into his role, or else they'll fire him. Not right. That shit ain't fucking right, man.
Starting point is 01:26:30 Ain't right. I got Max's back, dude. We're ready for fucking war tonight. Yep. Rooting for you guys. Real? Yeah, big time. I love the Celtics, though, as a roster.
Starting point is 01:26:39 What do you think about Harlow saying he's the second best white rapper? He is. What? Who's better? Mac Miller? Cena. What? John Cena? John Cena?
Starting point is 01:26:56 Huh? Alright, should we end the show? Or do you guys want to go for a little bit longer? Down for whatever. All right, let's just call it, bro. All right. Is that cool? I'm cool with that.
Starting point is 01:27:11 Are you guys cool with that? Kate, you all right with that? Yeah, I'm okay. I'm going to have some hamburger, too. Grab some out back. Let's have some hamburger after the show's over, not into the mic, and kind of just enjoy ourselves on our own. Love that.
Starting point is 01:27:22 Love that for us. All right, see you guys.W. Callahan's boy, Dylan.

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