The Yak - The Barstool Chicago Film Festival is Underway | The Yak 4-18-24
Episode Date: April 18, 2024*Sigh*You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, P.J., pull that up.
Hello.
Hey.
It's the Yak.
Welcome in.
Roback.com.
Promo code Yak.
20% off your first purchase.
Q-Zips.
Poles.
Hoodies.
Shorts.
Bathing suits.
Oh.
Bathing suits.
Joggers.
I'm wearing them right now.
You're wearing a bathing suit right now? Nope. I'm wearing joggers. That was the last word I said. And then I said i'm wearing them right now you're wearing a bathing suit right now nope i'm wearing joggers that was the last word i said and then i said i'm wearing
it right now i don't be listening to you roback.com promo code yak 20 off your first purchase we have
nick mook brandon i believe ron is coming i believe kb is coming. I believe Titus is coming. Uh-huh. I believe Che and Zah, but
we are in the midst of
the Chicago Film Festival.
Sure. So everyone's running around.
It's been fun.
I kind of like what you're doing right now. Me?
Yeah, it's like a
rap song where it's like
the backup guy. Yeah.
There's a name for it. What was Flavor Flav?
Hype Man? Yeah. You're just doing that. Yeah. There's a name for it. What was Flavor Flav? Hype Man? Hype Man?
Yeah.
You're just doing that.
Sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I don't be listening to you.
Yeah.
Can I be your Hype Man, Brandon?
You want to.
I'm not really.
I'm just hyping him.
All right.
So let's see how this works.
All right.
So we're doing the Chicago Film Festival right now.
Listen to them.
And everyone's out
doing their films.
They're all scattered.
That's right. Hype them up, Brandon.
I walked out and saw a parrot
in the kitchen.
Bird. We have a parrot. Sure is.
Squawk! I heard
I heard might be
headed to the Walker house. Tommy Walker's
parrot. Headed to the Walker's house. But's parrot. It's headed to the Walker's house.
But I guilted.
Yeah.
Nick did me a favor.
This is where the hype stops, by the way.
Nick did me a favor when Caitlin presented me with the bird that I have to take home.
He said it should be a pair.
Caitlin ripped it from the mate.
Yes.
At Petco.
And I said, no, no.
She showed me a picture of the two birds kissing.
Yes.
She was like, that was the last time they saw each other. And I said, no, no. She showed me a picture of the two birds kissing. Yes, she was like, that was the last time they saw each other.
And I said, fuck you.
Go get the second bird in a bigger cage.
Parakeet.
Parakeet?
What's the difference between a parrot and a parakeet?
A parrot's much bigger and can talk.
A parakeet's a tiny bird that can't talk. You have a parakeet.
I have a pair of parakeets.
I have a paraplegic pair. You have a pair of keats. I have a pair of pair of keats. Pair of pair of keats. I have a pair of cages as well.
You have a pair of cages.
No, I'm only going to keep one cage.
I'm going to take both cages.
Why not?
What if you need to separate them?
Why would I need to separate them?
If you were stuck in a cage with your mate all the time?
I am stuck in a cage with my mate.
What if they're the OJ and Nicole of pair of keats?
Oh, could be.
So I got to get a third that's Ron Goldman?
Yes. Oh, no could be. So I got to get a third that's Ron Goldman? Yes.
Oh, no.
That's a problem.
So I was getting one bird thanks to my sister.
Also, the bird's name is Cheryl.
It is named Cheryl.
Oh, wait.
You got the woman?
Yeah.
I don't know.
I just...
Caitlin was out there.
Apparently, one team needed a parakeet.
So that parakeet in the kitchen right now...
The parakeet's an actor.
She's cock crazy.
Yes. And she's... Hungry. She's salivating any piece of meat that walks by that parakeet is an actor
who's been hired to work in a production when that production is over the people the team just
is abandoning her no no and saying that seems like that's what's happening that's fucked no no no we
found a home we found your home no. I was told it was being abandoned.
You didn't find it. Caitlin asked me.
You didn't need to buy an animal.
We asked Caitlin and she texted Tommy
and Tommy said yeah.
You could have used Malasek's slut of a dog.
Right?
Malasek's been eyeing up that parakeet.
There's no guarantee that dog's a slut.
Jake fucks it. We don't know.
If you're fucking Jake, you're a slut.
We don't slut shame though.
Not even for dogs? If you're sleeping with Jake, you're a slut. We don't slut shame, though. No. Not even for dogs?
If you're sleeping with Jake, we'll shame you.
Yeah, that's true.
So I now have two parakeets.
Two parakeets.
Yeah, that are bound.
The kids will be excited about that, though.
Right?
I don't know.
And I'm not.
Where are you going to keep it?
I'm not going to tell my wife.
I'm just going to take it home.
Will she care?
See how long you can have it without her knowing.
I think I might go.
I can hide that thing in the basement.
I can hide that thing in the basement.
But then, TJ, Google parakeet lifespan.
Yeah, she's got to keep it alive.
She has to take care of it.
Yeah, so that's going to be a problem.
I could just.
Can they fly?
A little bit.
I could just let the damn thing go.
Nah, they're clipped, man.
Puck.
Okay, so I got a parakeet why don't do i have a a bug rigger or do i have a whoa uh i think you have the monk um how do you
know that yeah i just chose the one with the long lifespan i think it's uh i have a budgerigar
budgerigar that's what they call a budgie in Australia, right? I have a budgie, not a monkey.
You really think you have a budgie?
Can we see a picture of the monk?
And I think Cheryl's a newborn.
Do you want me to go get Cheryl?
How old are you?
Cheryl's my bird.
Cheryl's my bird.
Yeah.
Have y'all already used her?
Not yet.
Wait, you should name the other one Larry.
Wait, if that bird...
Or RFK Jr.
Let's talk.
If that bird belongs to me...
Yeah?
If that bird belongs to me...
Yes.
I'm not going to let that bird be used in a production.
Oh, you need to get a fee.
I don't like that this has become a competition.
This is a festival.
This should be fun.
I'll let Mark Titus use my hair product.
It was the biggest compliment of my life. I'm using Kate's house. There is a festival this should be fun i'll let mark titus use my hair product it was the biggest compliment of my life well it is a i'm using kate's house it is there is a winner
sure right we got to figure out the prize for that but you think that team's gonna win
yeah probably not yeah help them out wait who's on your team titus tommy they could win they
actually have a good one the only team that can't win is Frank's team. Yeah. Good. There was a lot of drama yesterday.
I just, that was something.
We've put out some of the footage.
There was a lot more that the camp,
because there's going to be like a documentary on like.
Yeah.
The, so I, I've been checking in on every team and the first 20 minutes I
walked into Frank's team's room and it just had a big board and it said
butcher or no, it said hot dog frank is a butcher
and then frank came and watched baseball with me for an hour and i came back and there was like 40
things on the board yeah and then we had mckenzie versus frank dante versus frank i also overheard
jenks telling frank your call time this morning is 7 30 if they're not filling by 7 32 we're pulling you from the set
wow now wait a minute so like you know frank's getting two and a half million dollars for this
during the meeting frank watched baseball and fell asleep in the meeting yes that was can we
play the mckenzie clip i mean mckenzie with some of the greatest comedic timing so good
an entrance but yeah i can't sit in that room oh you were sleeping so
do you know how much it takes for mckenzie to push back yeah yeah there's this is gonna be
great though i like everyone was there were people here till 11 12 p.m 12 a.m writing scripts
like getting these these are to be good films.
And they're 12 minutes long?
Oh, 5 to 7.
I thought it was 5 to 7, but it could be, I don't know. I'm expecting 12 as a critic.
Oh.
Well, we were told 5 to 7.
We were told 5 to 12.
Okay.
What if that's how I just judged them all?
If it's 12 minutes on the dot, yeah.
No, just whichever the longest one wins.
We should have a longest movie competition.
I like that.
You would vote which one will win yeah before so is it five to twelve it doesn't brandon it's not gonna matter
how long is yours i mean we timed ours out though we timed ours out but then we're adding shit
yeah you're filming it all this afternoon uh yeah how are you feeling about your role as soon as we get done here brandon has the most lines by oh that's weird 80 i didn't do that i did yeah he did that um you know it was a group
effort yeah it was a group effort but uh when we leave here we're heading to your hair looks
phenomenal today thank you we're heading to do our dance number madeline had choreographed us a dance
oh and i was ben mince dancing in this dance oh no
we did we're involving him smart smart decision ben mince is the main character with three lines
yeah nice three lines mince walked by us today and goes i don't know like i've seen some funny
shit in my life but this is the funniest shit i've ever been in yeah um for the script writing
yesterday he went home so he could research his character oh um he also grabbed my shirt now i'm gonna be in a bad shirt oh no that will be he took my two
extra i will make sure that's in the notes yeah the judges also great film last night and didn't
look like he was oh wrong i threw the idea to my to my producer or my director or whatever my writer
here that my character should my writer my writer i i thought that my character should be. My writer? My writer.
I thought my character should be a goateed man,
and he said.
I said you just want to goatee, don't you?
I just felt like my character.
I said shave a goatee?
No, you did it a little sassy, and I just wanted you to be on board with the idea.
Let's shave a goatee.
Mincy left a few hours early while we were writing
to research his character.
Should we quiz him on the
character yeah yes he's here right i don't want to do it on yeah yeah yeah because we're on his
like away oh that's right he also was busy uh we'll just ask him the character's name yes he
was in the kitchen he was in a deep conversation with doug who was just walking through about
pelicans fandom oh yeah it's tough doug didn't break stride yeah good on doug but he was just
talking to him the whole time oh someone's clapping i have an issue that i'd like to address please
i'm mad at mook oh boy fuck yeah all right yeah mook i think there's some
we got some shit to talk no why i'm not mad at him for the reason you're thinking, Brandon. I'm mad at him because he made me feel like I should feel bad.
Yes.
And that's wrong of him.
Yeah, you're right.
He put me in a spot where I should potentially feel bad for him,
and I don't like that.
So I'm mad at you.
You should potentially feel bad for me, yeah. No, that so i'm mad you should potentially feel bad
for me yeah no but i don't know i don't like how you're making you're forcing you're non-consensually
forcing feelings on me well let him lay that out why should he feel bad yesterday i don't think i
should feel bad yesterday i found out who my true friends were i was with you i found out who my
friends were uh yeah who are they yeah not you
for sure what did i do not you what did i do i gotta be fine in this brandon you're in my hole
you're acting you're acting like i knew this girl that doesn't count as a date roan in my hole
what roan's in your hole no you don't roan was definitely you won't roan me and roan both to
come in your hole roan was definitely part of this. Kate is your biggest op.
Yeah, Kate was by far the biggest insane.
I'm not an op.
I was sitting here clenching my teeth.
I was walking out of the room and you go, I don't have enough respect to not do this.
I said I don't have a lot of respect for Mook, but I have enough to where I don't want to listen to this.
Yeah.
Okay, yeah, op.
What?
KB, not an op.
Come on. Not a what? The militia. Not a What? KB, not an op. Come on.
Not a what?
The militia.
Not a what?
The militia came out yesterday.
What's the word?
Opposition.
Yeah, op.
Wait, so he is?
Not an op.
Not an op.
He's gang.
No, he was op.
Was he op?
He was giddy as a clam.
Did you watch it?
No, I didn't watch it.
Yeah.
He might have been.
I'm no op.
I said no word.
Everyone in this room was
op no no not me the girls i said everyone in this room now only the only op there's two ops and
they're both women but we're getting distracted by the thoughts here of like yes we are two women
mook is is making us feel bad and that's not right it really isn't we really he should all he should apologize
to us moot come on apologize for going on a date with a girl that would do that do something like
that yeah you brought her you put us in a bad situation dangled that girl in front of us like
he's she's gonna say something about you should be a better judge of character oh this girl won't
surprise me at work and you should never make me feel bad again. Not saying I did, but I was close.
What the fuck is your problem?
I was edging feeling bad.
I was like, should I feel bad?
Nah, it's mook.
I felt bad.
No, it's mook.
I felt bad and I wasn't, I was like him.
I didn't know what y'all said.
I know you guys don't respect me.
Right.
No, I respect you.
But yesterday was a day where I was like oh the respect there's not
respect isn't even a word there is no respect it is funny because the the uh female in question
but it's fine did text mook saying do those guys not like you and i was like what you like him a
lot oh they're on the show multiple texts about that but i don't don't feel bad for me i'm
fucking with thank you yeah and also don't but also say other people shouldn't don't feel bad for me. I'm fucking with you guys. Thank you. And also, don't...
But also...
Other people shouldn't make us feel bad.
I'd like for you to feel like you maybe should feel bad.
I like that.
I did.
I could see where a big guy feeling bad would be addicting.
Yeah, but I never felt bad.
I swore on the record, never felt bad.
Yeah, but you're lamenting the fact that you almost felt bad.
I thought about feeling bad.
Which is important.
Which is something that he should never do. You're on the path to feeling bad you almost felt bad. I thought about feeling bad. Which is important. Which is something that he should never do.
You're on the path to feeling bad.
You shouldn't make me think about feeling bad.
We need to band together.
I have an idea.
No.
We reach out to Coulter.
He lets you in his office.
You surprise her at work.
Oh, and we film it.
Yeah.
I like that.
There are times you need to feel bad.
I feel bad the appropriate amount of times.
Do you feel bad that I ate meatballs last night?
No, I was good for you.
You looked like you were living your best life.
Sounds like you enjoyed your night.
Yeah, you're like, I'm eating meatballs, watching Sopranos.
That's actually when I stopped about feeling bad.
I got in here to film this morning or to finish up the script,
and you were lifting.
You've never been better.
I bench pressed for an hour this morning.
Yeah, I talked to you.
You had a conversation last night you were fine so that was where the thinking about
feeling bad was this lit a fire yeah i feel good good for you yeah i'm gonna keep bench pressing
my demons i think i'm gonna do another hour on the bench wow today and just you're gonna be
pecked the fuck up yep just trying to get a huge ass chest hey we're just uh recapping yesterday real quick and how mook actually is should be apologizing to us
because he made us almost feel bad yeah right well he thinks you're in his hole i am and i
have i thought you were in my hole.
I, from the beginning, had your back.
I told her that, of course, it was a date.
It was a dating show.
And you bought the drinks.
I asked, did he buy the drinks?
She said, yeah.
Up.
Up.
I'm not an up.
Say sorry to me.
No.
Oh, that's going to be a problem.
Fuck.
What? What, a bower? Oh, that's going to be a problem. Whatabower.
He's about to apologize to us for making us almost feel bad.
Yesterday was as close to a terrorist attack as we've ever had in this office.
He's right.
But you know who orchestrated it?
Her.
Yes.
Yeah.
She, you can't give that to us.
And the reason that harlot's in our life is because of you.
Correct.
So, again, we all wrote these back to Mook apologizing to us.
It's because of your talent on stage and your charm.
Yeah.
Because you're so damn good at standing up.
I knew you were ganged.
Right.
And because he was standing behind a curtain.
I saw that clip, and that was tough.
I didn't watch anything from it.
Why do we just have – what's Will doing?
Oh, hey, Will.
Hey, Will.
Will, what's up?
What are you – what?
I'm at – we're touring Oregon right now.
Oh, okay.
It's beautiful out here.
I just wanted to know what your thoughts on the unnamed show were.
Unnamed show, what happened?
They ripped you.
They ripped you bad.
What'd they say?
I think one of the phrases was, you are a successful mincey.
You know, that's fair.
Okay.
I've had a tough run, but I haven't listened to any of the clips yet.
I just wanted to keep the streak alive of you having to come on and defend yourself.
I have nothing to defend right now.
Once I hear the clips, what's sad, Big Cat,
is you could have probably called into the show to defend me.
Just like you want to say you've been in the
box. I was doing PMT,
so I couldn't defend you. I would have defended
you. Will, also,
one question logistically.
Beer Olympics, is it Monday and Tuesday?
So,
we fly in Sunday evening.
It's going to be a nice little welcoming,
light the flame, reception tunnel of chaos.
Monday's the day it goes down, and Tuesday's, yeah, it's like the hangover recovery.
Everybody flies out.
That's a three-day event.
Oh, okay.
Brandon, what do you think?
You just get hammered and fly out that night?
Why is he hollering?
I might have a conflict.
What's your conflict?
I might not be able to make it.
That is a conflict.
Don't fuck around right now, bro.
Don't even put that in the interview.
I just want to restart the flame.
No, I'll be there.
You know I'll be there no matter what.
All right, no, I actually appreciate that answer because we were talking about it
and we're like, if this is a two-day drinking event, I don't think I can do it.
But one day and a hangover day is perfect.
Yeah, hangover day, we're going to have IVs for everybody.
We're going to have stuff set up for us.
So we'll get you recovered.
Because I didn't want to stay.
I didn't want to drink all day Monday, then drink all day Tuesday,
then have to go home on Wednesday.
Yeah.
No, we got you, bro.
We'll get you taken care of.
I'm excited again.
Great.
All right, I'll see you on the battlefield.
I assume I have your support against the unnamed show.
Probably see you tomorrow.
Hey, is Dan Lanning there right now?
No, we're rocking around with Nate.
He's giving us a tour of the facility.
All right, when you start the Dan Lanning interview,
just zoom back in.
I got a question for him.
Okay, I got you.
Don't actually, because you know what question i'm
gonna ask he doesn't i don't know if i do i don't know if i do right now you sent it to me last
night oh that's what you would ask him about yeah yeah yeah i probably won't do that maybe i'll do
it just for fun and then i'll put it in the show okay all right just make him a little uncomfortable
sounds good all right okay see you
will the uh he's going to interview the oregon head coach is he farting oh what did he oh i think
he did i think it was jp the oregon coach there was like a player who i think just might have
gotten a dui and killed someone uh yesterday very bad yeah dang and you're just gonna ask about that no i was never gonna ask
about that but he is will send it to me he's like this is awkward i was like yeah i wouldn't bring
that up no or if you phrase it to where it's not a question just be like i just wanted to say it
don't have to answer it's not a question yeah kyle how's your team doing? It's going well Slow One day isn't a lot
One day's not a lot
A little overwhelming
Why are you giddy?
I'm not
What's your role?
I'm miserable right now
You seem giddy
Do I?
Yeah
Not at all
What's my role?
In a few scenes
Okay
I hear you
Yeah?
Yeah
We only have one Where are you guys I hear you. Yeah? Yeah. We only have one.
Where are you guys at?
Scenes filmed?
Yeah.
We're about halfway done.
I'd say we have 30% of the scenes filmed.
Yeah.
Nice.
Yeah.
Good progress.
I'm going to get out of here by like 7.
Yeah.
Nice.
That'd be great.
So you're on the Frank team, right?
Yes.
But you weren't here for the drama.
Has it calmed down?
I was here for a little bit of it. I I mean he's like a star player of a team there's different rules for different
players you know what I mean if uh if I start having a breakdown like that I'll be kicked off
the team immediately but Frank is the linchpin the fulcrum around which everything bends has
there been more today? No.
Frank is very happy with his role.
It's beautifully written.
Is he the lead?
He is.
Yeah, he's a lead.
He's one of the few, the proud, the strong.
Kyle, I like the high tops.
These?
Yeah.
The ones I'm wearing? I like them.
Thank you.
Yeah, I like them too.
Nick got them for me.
For real?
Yeah.
I like the stocks.
Thanks, man.
Thanks.
I'm a casual guy now.
Yeah, I like them.
I think it fits your vibe.
I don't know.
I think you pull off the white socks with them,
but that was my concern with wearing Birkenstocks.
Can I wear white socks?
And you can.
With white socks with Birkenstocks?
Yeah.
And what about yours?
You thought you couldn't wear white socks?
I'll wear what?
What should I have done?
I think it looks good.
You think I should have gone to Woolens?
You should have done Woolens?
I don't know.
That's what I'm confused about with Birkenstocks, where I feel like I can't make the jump.
If my goofy ass can do it, you can.
And look flyer than I ever could.
Stop.
Don't even fucking start with that shit.
You were here late last night with Pat.
Yes.
Well, yes, kind of with Pat.
And then they were just grinding, riding up there.
Yeah.
Who's your guys' team MVP so far?
Mad Dog.
Really?
Yeah.
She's seen 2020?
She wrote the ending, because we couldn't get an ending.
And she also choreographed the dance for us.
So I learned how to do a jazz square today.
Show us.
Well, you're going to have to wait for the flick.
But you know jazz square?
Oh, he knows the jazz square.
Up he does.
He knows it.
Oh, he knows it.
Oh, oh, oh. Is that it? That is exactly it. Up he does He knows it Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh Oh That's
That is exactly it
Yeah
Fuck yeah
It's jazzy as hell
Wait how did Frank do today?
Really really good
Did you start on time?
Uh
So they pushed
They pushed the start time
Cause he was bugging out
It was like 5
5.30 start time
Yeah
What?
Originally
But then they pushed it
Uh Was he in the wrong? For what? For his like meltdown 5.30 start time. What? Originally, but then they pushed it.
Was he in the wrong?
For what?
For his meltdown?
I mean, it's creative differences.
It's like one guy wants to play man, one guy wants to play zone.
It's like nobody's wrong.
Was he in the wrong for his hissy fits?
No, never.
Do you think he needs someone to make, like a who like Kind of is like A moral guidance A soother
Not a soother
He got some yes men
The opposite of a soother
A Lego to chew on
Somebody to get him back on track
A man
A man Lego
A no man
A no man
Yeah Janks was saying
Before
Janks has it
He was saying that
Their call time was 730
And if they're not filming by 732
He's pulling them off the set
Cause no one
like denzel would not wait no it's like that yeah it's like that but i think like some like
some sprinters can run the 100 and some can run the 4x100 and i think he's like he can run the 100
yeah you're metaphored up today pretty good are there sprinters i also don't think that
is that not true? No.
No, that is true.
That sounded awesome.
That is true. If you can run the 100, you can run the 4x100.
Yeah, because some guys are not.
Some guys can't catch the baton.
Yeah, some guys can't catch the baton, and then some guys are, like, can catch the baton.
Okay.
Oh, I saw the best baton freak out.
I think I saw that, too.
The high school girls.
She just left the track.
She quit because it was such a bad hand. I want to see it. She could have won. They were, like, still in the race. I felt I saw that too. The high school girls. She just left the track. She quit because it was such a bad
hand. I want to see it. She could have won. They were like
still in the race. I felt her pain. Yeah.
Give me the fucking baton.
Can we find that clip? Who would you say
your team LVP is?
Frank. Probably me.
Because I had to be away from the team
for so long. Yeah, but like then when
you walk in, it's got to get the people
amped up. Yeah, you coming back. Daddy's back. Yeah, but no, I think I offer so long. Yeah, but then when you walk in, it's got to get the people amped up.
Yeah, you're coming back.
Daddy's back.
Yeah, but no, I think I offer so little.
I think what I just offer was kind of like an organizational presence early on,
but then that leaves,
and then there's disorganization,
so I think it throws us into disarray.
So I'd say I could have been better.
I don't know, but the fear of letting you down.
Give me the sack!
Give me the fucking sack!
Ugh.
Just quit.
Wow.
Give me the fucking sack.
She's a 100 runner, not a 4x1.
That's right.
That's a Frank.
That's exactly the Frank type of archetype
that we have on our team.
Damn.
But Donnie's been grinding.
Donnie's in MVP conversation.
Which Donnie?
Chef.
Ah, yeah.
Be Shawnee.
He was here till like the wee hour.
Spider was here till the wee hours.
Tom Lea here till wee hours.
I knew it was a problem when Spider got his serious voice on.
I asked him how his team was doing and he, you know when Spider got his serious voice on. I asked him how his team was doing, and you know when Spider does a serious voice?
Yep.
And it was like, okay, there's issues.
He goofs off, though.
He's not afraid to goof off.
He loves tossing stuff.
Yeah.
Spider's always tossing something.
Physically.
And also to Taji's.
He's tactile.
Nick, who's our LVP?
It's obvious. It's obvious's obvious It is it really is
It's not Minty
Oh I know who it is
Oh yeah he is he is
It's Nicky Smokes
Oh my goodness
Stand in front of the camera for a second
Don't give too much away
Oh shit Wow Detective Oh my god Stand in front of the camera for a second. Come here. Don't give too much away. Oh, shit.
Wow.
Detective.
Oh, my God.
Damn.
Hey, I...
Damn.
The true detective right there.
Oh, my God.
I'll do anything to get out of this ticket.
All right.
Wait, do you have your phone on you?
Yeah.
All right, I'm going to text you a line.
I just want to see how it sounds.
No, wait, I actually don't. This is Chase.
This is Chase's phone. Text it to my phone.
Is that your passcode, Chase?
That's where I was trying to find Chase. Is he back there?
He's in there, yeah.
We need him for...
Chase, are those really tiny sunglasses you have on your collar?
Don't worry about it.
Look at Chase.
This was making its rounds
Among our team
They were having a good laugh at Che's expense
Alright, say that line for me
Alright
And give it real
Give it your real
Okay
Okay
Ready?
Sir, you're under arrest for thinking getting drinks in a group is a date.
God damn it.
Sir, come with me.
Me.
That's me.
Up, up, up, up, up.
I just said me.
Everybody.
I love you, Mook. I love you, Mook.
I love you, too.
I will not say sorry, though.
No, you will.
I won't fold.
Oh, yeah?
I won't fold.
I'm sorry.
No, don't.
No, no, no.
Hey, where's my bird?
Yeah, call me off.
Now that I do think about it.
Bring me my bird.
Why did she come?
Bring me my bird. That was a setup cheryl you guys negotiated with the terrorists yesterday well i think that the
natural instinct is somebody's a guest so you want to make them feel more comfortable by
you know taking down somebody among our ranks someone someone who could take it instead of turning it on the guest
when it was indeed
a setup.
She should have told you.
Yeah, for sure. But what was her motive?
I don't know.
Did she talk to you any about it?
She just said that you guys are very mean to me
and that's about it. That's not true.
Wasn't she quite mean to you?
I actually would argue we're not mean enough how would you win that argument we just got to be meaner and then let him know
and he can let us know when enough is enough i'll never let you know well it's like a taffer uh you
know stress test yeah we'll just mean test them yeah and he passed once someone flips the crab
fries yeah and you shut it down.
Passed so far.
Pat, I don't mean.
Pat's our LVP, by the way.
Pat's here.
Aren't you supposed to be filming for him?
Least valuable player.
Yes.
Pat walked into the filming, got everybody riled up about the migrant crisis,
ripped his ass during the final scene when he wasn't even in it,
and he was like, well, see ya.
I helped with the writing.
Yeah, that's true.
Yeah, I was too much cooks in the kitchen.
You know, you have a million people standing around.
You're just going to slow the whole process.
Start talking about the migrant.
I was being serious.
Aren't you part of the group that's over there now?
Yeah, Fasoli was like, all right, come over.
This will take 10 minutes, and we got in there.
I was like, this is going to take an hour and a half to set up.
He was like, yeah, you're probably right.
I was like, all right, well, I'm going to go.
Okay.
Pat wants to do the gauntlet, so we've got to have him do the gauntlet.
He'll be good.
Yes.
Pat, you should know
As is tradition
I texted the wrong Pat
Just now?
Yeah
It wasn't me to come in?
It was my friend Pat
So I have three Pats on my phone
My friend Pat
Pat security
And Pat
Right
And all of them are Pat
And I always text
I've texted him probably
five times asking security
Pat for something. Do you wrong
text a lot? Because you texted Nicky Smokes
this morning. Yeah I did. I texted him
that was a mistake too. But that was also
I was on my computer and he had
texted me and then I thought I was talking
to my wife. But you can't switch it.
You can't switch it. So I have three Pats
and I have not specified which one and I just. switch it. You can't switch it. So I have three Pats, and I have not specified which one, and I just...
Use context.
You got Pat Bev, too, and Kate Pat.
I feel like you should just take away their last names, too, just to confuse it.
I do have Pats.
I do have Pat Bev.
I have Pat.
He's under hard factor Pat.
But yeah, I should probably remove that.
Just do a group chat.
Yeah.
So all my Pats?
All Pats.
And then we have to figure out Who you're talking to
Yeah
Yeah
Yeah I mean texting my friend Pat
He was just like
I'm at work
In Nashville
I texted
I was like
I was like
We have an open chair
Come in here
I show up
What
Where's Joey at
I'd love him to run the gauntlet
He's at my set
I was actually
You mentioned that yesterday
I think that might be a bad idea
Why
Because it will take forever Like I was trying to shoot on this hoop it could legitimately take
him two days it would be funny it would be really funny like the baseball thing like oh yeah ball
i'm already stressed out about that like i can't even imagine how often do you hoop
not too often you were in a league for a while i was in a league for a while. I was in a league for a while, yeah, but I have a broken shoulder,
so I can't really do anything.
You were in the gay league, right?
I went to a game.
Way back at – when was that?
You invited me to a game, and I went.
That's right.
Because I thought it would be funny.
It wasn't.
Oh, you guys were just good.
Why would it be funny?
Why would it be funny?
They were good.
Yeah, we thought it would be –
Why would it be funny?
Wait, there's a gay league?
Yeah.
Nick goes, there's no way they can play basketball.
I was like, this is going to be the funniest thing.
Pat's really good at basketball.
I'm nervous about this, though.
Pat's got the Hoopers pass.
Well, do we have Malasek?
So you might not.
He's here.
Get out of there.
Is he here right now?
I don't think Connor's here right now.
Brandon, you might have to set it up.
Jay's not here right now.
Yeah, I sucked.
What's a good time?
Under four.
Under three.
Really good under three.
Three is like a par.
I was four and change, I think.
Probably middle of the pack.
It feels really bad whenever you don't do incredibly well.
And then the questions are going to fuck me up, I feel like, at the end.
I think you're built for this more than most.
Yeah. You have the Hooper's Pass for sure.
I get nervous, though.
So I might get in my own head.
You want a pill? Yeah.
Yeah, should we take some pills?
Fuck it.
A popper?
A popper?
What's a popper?
Nice. You're good. R.I.s for the boys. A popper? A popper. Oh, I love poppers. What's a popper? Shut the fuck up.
Nice.
You're good.
There he is.
That's what I was doing on the bench at your basketball league.
You are.
That was fun.
Instead of a Gatorade boy.
It wasn't fun at all.
It was impressive, but not fun.
Surprising.
Yeah.
I mean, it's funny that you thought they wouldn't be good.
Yeah, that's what's funny.
Yeah.
I hated that league. Everyone was too nice to each other After everyone was like going out for drinks
I'm like ugh I want to like hate you as I'm playing against you
Yeah
I need some friendly competition
Malsec is here that's bad news for you
Horrible news
Honestly boot it at his fucking face
If he's going to come and cut down the angle
And come off the line
Smoke him in the fucking face
How does he get to go off the line?
I heard you say that yesterday. Smoke him in the
face. He can just run out.
He can just run out like that?
Smoke him in the face then. If he wants to be
brave, smoke him in his fucking face.
I just kick him in the face? Yeah, don't even use
the ball.
He's looking for any reflective
surface to see himself.
Oh, yeah.
The walk.
You can see it in the walk.
Yeah, he's feeling himself.
I don't blame him.
Not one bit.
Man.
Imagine being on the receiving end of that.
Law and order.
Titus style.
I think Chef Don, or I think Wanton Don is the other cop,
which is a great combo of cops.
That's a good combo of cops.
That's bad cop, bad cop, though.
We have Jerry in our group, too, and he brought up in the writers' meeting,
he brought up the idea of prostitution.
Oh.
And maybe we should use our budget to method act.
Oh.
Nicky Smokes pitched a scene where he's rubbing a pussy.
Oh.
For good luck.
Like the Apollo.
He's really, I thought he was like a character.
No.
That's really him.
That's him.
I think he dramatizes it because it's well received.
No, but he also at his core is a douche bag.
I didn't want to ride over to the studio with him.
I was like, this is going to be a ride.
It was just like mumble rap on like 10,000 the whole way over.
Car just reeks like weed oh our set is like it has to be like an underground rapper paradise really vending machines with like pickles and other
rappers like little baby chips really oh rap snacks yeah what was lucas and nikki smokes uh
like not beef but when when Lucas was like,
we don't even play the same sport, when they were, like, talking about scooping babes.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Yeah, I think he was saying that Smokes is better than him.
Well, I think he also was saying Lucas doesn't actually pick up babes.
Right, so what does he do?
He goes on dates, and then he, he Third date he never gets to a third date
And so he was saying that
Nikki Smokes does way better than him
I don't know
Oh that's what Nikki Smokes said to me yesterday
He came to the gambling cave and was like
I just don't know what to do bro
I was like what are you talking about
I was supposed to go on a date tonight
But like I don't know if this chick is gonna put out
I was like what the fuck
Has he asked you any questions about being gay?
Because I could see him being that type of guy.
He, I didn't even know he was on my team.
And when I walked in here, the first thing he said was,
he's like, I'm not kissing you, bro.
You should have forced the issue.
You should have been like, no.
You're homophobic if we don't hot mouth right now.
I make out with Nicky Smollett.
What do you think he tastes like?
Not even on camera.
Definitely like a light tobacco and patchouli oil.
A little bit of menthol.
Yeah, a tiny, tiny bit.
Some Uncrustables.
He's brought up not kissing you a lot.
Sounds like he wants to.
Do I have permission to smooch him against his will?
But then, it was before he even told you about kissing,
Mad Dog was on our team, and he went up to her.
He's like, if we have to kiss, we got to kiss.
This guy wants to kiss.
Some guys just like to kiss.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
He's a kissing guy.
You got to leg sweep him, take him down, and just kiss him down.
Just kiss him all up and down.
Yeah, kiss him up and down his body.
Every inch of his body.
A little tiny kiss is all over him.
I feel like he would step to me.
I don't know.
I think he would fight it for a little bit, but then he wouldn't.
But then you know how dudes take off their shirt for fighting?
You whip your shirt off, but then start taking off your pants too.
And you're like, let's fucking do this thing then.
If I was about to get jumped and I got beat butt-ass naked, am I still going to get jumped?
No, I don't think so.
Someone does that.
Whose move is that?
Terrell Owens did that against – he fought Hugh Douglas in the Eagles locker room.
And he got naked?
He was ass naked, but I think he had shoes on.
That's more naked.
We talked about this.
That's the most level naked.
Naked with shoes is the most naked.
The most naked.
I don't think I've ever been naked with just shoes yeah
it's insane it's wild it's only for streaking i think yeah probably yeah you need the grip
yeah because like throwing shoes if like your door dash is here
do they do they streak at any of your guys' colleges? No. No.
They do that at the University of Virginia.
We were there when they won the championship.
Malsec.
And they do it.
They have this long, beautiful quad where probably Thomas Jefferson and Robert E. Lee stayed.
Can you cup?
Ah, Robert E. Lee.
No, everybody's... No one's cupping?
No one's cupping.
Oh, I'm cupping.
What's that?
Maybe a couple.
The Sporkle guy? Yeah. Oh, I'm cupping. What's that? Maybe a couple. The Sporkle guy?
Yeah.
Oh, you guys missed him.
Oh.
Oh.
Oh, nice.
It's just a Kate?
None of us were here.
I was.
We would never have.
Shout out to Danny Cornelius.
No, shout out to that guy.
He's the best.
He makes all the Sporkles for us.
Yeah, you can just put it in the kitchen.
Oh, wait. Let me do a DraftKings ad then I get a question for you Malasek
82 game preseason is in the books
it's finally time for the real season
don't miss out on any of the
NBA playoff action at DraftKings Sportsbook
an official sports betting partner of the NBA
from the play-in tournament through the finals
from every opening tip to every buzzer beater
DraftKings Sportsbook has you covered with same-game parlays,
live betting odds, boosts, and so much more.
And if you're new to this whole sports betting thing,
it's super easy to get started.
Try betting on something simple like a team to win.
Go to the app, select your team, place your first bet.
It's that simple.
Go right now.
DraftKings Sportsbook.
Here's something else to sweeten the
deal all new customers bet five dollars get two hundred dollars in bonus bets instantly new
customers download the DraftKings Sportsbook app use code yak that's code yak to get two hundred
dollars in bonus bets when you bet just five dollars only on the DraftKings Sportsbook the
crown is yours did you streak in college yeah did you cup no oh actually more important question did you streak in college
while other people were streaked yes because you seem like a guy who would just no i went the night
we won the national championship we went on the lawn it's like a thing wait so i might have seen
his cock yeah maybe wait you saw malice i remember seeing them on the corner do you remember your
cock being seen uh i'm sure it was i mean mean, there was like 100, 200 people there.
There's 200 cocks there?
200 people there.
There was 40,000.
No, on the lawn running when I was there.
You were on like the corner, which is like the big like intersection down.
Yes, yes, yes.
Where the lawn is where the rotunda is at UVA.
There's a big lawn all the way down to like the academic buildings.
And when people wanted to.
It gets filled up with cocks.
I went a couple of times, but that was like the big night was when we won the title.
Is it just cocks?
No, it was women.
Is it like fun?
Yeah, it was pussies.
Was it dark enough to where you'd kiss?
Yeah, it was.
How did your cock look?
You could see everything.
Normal?
Does the fun necessitate nudity?
Yeah, you streak the lawn.
That's like a thing we do.
I would never do that.
Would you have just as much fun in underwear?
No, I would have had less fun.
Do they try to stop you?
No, that night it was definitely a free for all.
The other night I went, it was probably worse.
Cops trying to tackle people?
No one was there the other night.
Did people do it with underwear on?
It was mostly naked people.
Any hot chicks?
Yeah, definitely.
It was cool.
It was a lot of fun.
Did you remain soft?
Yeah.
No, he was chubbed up.
He had to be.
Any massive dicks?
I don't remember exactly the people that were there.
I just remember there was a lot of naked people that night.
Were you bird watching?
Yeah, I was bird watching.
I also was trying to do it as fast as possible because I wanted to put my clothes back on.
Did you have your shoes on?
Yeah.
You're the nakedest.
Nakedest.
Yeah, I was butt naked with shoes on.
No, the most naked.
Oh, yeah.
No, I had shoes on.
So I wasn't.
Yeah, right.
You're the most naked.
No, no, no.
That's the most naked.
With shoes?
Oh, yeah, no, I had shoes on, so I wasn't born naked. Yeah, right, you're the most naked. No, no, that's the most naked. With shoes? Oh, yeah.
I feel like at, like, the smarter the school, the more likely to streak.
Yeah.
I feel like...
I feel like they do it, Ivy League does it, too.
Ivy League, yeah.
I probably went three times.
UCLA does a naked run or some shit.
Yeah?
Should I go back to undergrad?
Yeah.
But I think it's because at Ivy League they, like, streak,
and then they all are like, we technically had sex.
I think that's definitely what it is.
Like this is our sexual liberation period without actually having to.
Yeah, they judge it on like the MOOC scale.
Like we were in the same room.
I had 300 dates last night.
I'm exhausted.
What's your body count?
All right. That was all we had, Val.
What was the prompt of that?
I asked if...
Rowan saw your cock.
If bros had streaked,
and I said that it happened at UVA,
that I saw streaking,
and I didn't realize that I had seen
your beautiful, luscious dog.
Did you know who they were?
I did, yeah.
Isn't that crazy?
I wasn't a voice for it at the time,
but I was there.
I saw you guys, you and Caleb.
White Boy Rick said that when we went to Indiana, he waited in line to get pictures of all of us.
Yeah, I did not do that.
And then he got a naked picture.
Yeah, he streaked.
He was streaking.
What was he streaking for?
Anything important? Nothing.
He was just like, look at my cock.
Streak for the cause.
He has a cock?
You like White Boy Rick?
I don't know who that is. You guys run in White Boy Rick? I don't know who that is.
You guys run in the same circles?
I don't know who White Boy Rick is.
He's fighting back, by the way.
Oh, he's mad.
He's fighting back.
Straight Boy Rick.
He got all of us sitting like this.
And was like, look at that.
That's not going to work.
He doesn't realize he's in a Chinese finger tour.
Don't fight it.
Show Pat the clip. We think he realize he's in a Chinese finger tour. Don't fight it. Show Pat the clip.
We think he's gay.
That's white boy Rick.
No, that's Doug.
That's white boy Doug.
That's white boy Doug.
What if we just all just were white?
That's white boy Doug.
White boy Brandon.
Oh, my God. No, no.
Yeah, see?
He's trying to get us.
No, I wasn't arching.
He was, like, biting his nails real feminine. Yeah, holding the phone's trying to get us. No, I wasn't arching. You were just like biting his nails real feminine.
Yeah, holding the phone.
Who is life-wise?
Someone show me right by Rick.
He's big.
He's good looking.
When you bite the outside of your nail with your thing like this.
Yeah.
He's a big corn feather.
You have to bite the inside of the nail.
You have to go inside to outside if you're straight.
And outside to inside.
Look at him sit.
That's why. Oh my god.
He's presenting.
He's a good looking guy.
You remember in elementary school you'd tell someone
to look at their nails and you'd do this?
Yes, this or this.
This is gay?
If you look like this, you go look at your nails.
And that's how you found out?
And how you put up the
number three what's that one try it that shows if I'm trying to think the
straightest way to do it
you couldn't do it that way hey what's the gay way I forget maybe it's not a
gay thing I think it's the German or I think you're thinking of Inglourious Basterds.
When he does this.
He's either gay or Nazi. I can't remember.
The totally story.
So where's White Boy Rack?
He's around. He's running boom mic for team three. Oh, nice.
Jesus Christ. We said stop sitting on it,
bro. Come on.
Said that? Yeah.
I don't know if it's like
our jokes translate
when you do them.
I like to come on here and have fun with my friends.
Malasek.
Malasek going off the white boy wicked saying it.
I try.
How about Malasek doing the dick sucking yesterday
and nobody reacted.
Delayed laugh.
You guys started laughing.
Everybody else started laughing.
They were laughing with everybody.
His yak, when people recognize him from the yak,
his mention has been changed from the cuck on the yak to the goalie on the yak.
Oh, nice.
You've gone from cuck on the yak to goalie on the yak.
Yeah.
That's awesome.
Big moment for me.
That's huge. Yeah, let's the act. Yeah. That's cool. That's awesome. That was a big moment for me. That's huge.
Yeah, let's do this.
All right.
So nervous.
Yeah, Pat's going.
Dude, I also heard that you guys are getting some sweet summer interns.
Yes.
Oh, I didn't.
Yeah.
New crop.
Really?
I was just talking to Gaz about it.
You're somehow getting the boys and the girls are going to where Gaz is?
Hmm.
Huh.
Well, isn't that interesting?
I didn't know that.
That makes sense.
That makes a lot of sense.
Makes a lot of sense.
We do need more dudes in here.
Yeah, we need more white boys.
Yeah.
We need some more boys in here.
All right, Pat, you're up.
Let's do it.
Oh, quick shout out to the vintage guy.
Yes.
Nick Tabone at Pulp Vintage.
Yeah, Pulp Vintage.
He sent me Jets, Kent State shit. Cleveland, bro. He got you some shit. Go to the Instagram, Pulp Vintage. This is me? Yeah. Yes. Nick Tabone at Pulp Vintage. Yeah, Pulp Vintage. He sent me Jets, Kent State shit.
Cleveland bowling.
Put it in the Instagram.
Pulp Vintage.
This is me?
Yeah.
No.
You got Kate stuff,
Chase.
Awesome guy.
Oh, this is me for real?
Yeah, I got a sick bear shirt.
Too many men.
Too many men.
Pulp Vintage.
Check it out.
He'll find you some stuff.
This is like a,
looks like a Tasmanian devil
type dip.
It looks tough and it's also vacuumed. You did Native American there? Huh? Tasmanian devil type dip. It looks tough.
You did Native American there?
Huh?
Tasmanian devil.
Yeah, you did.
You ended devil like that.
The devil type dip.
Taz sweatshirts are awesome.
Quite devil.
Yeah.
You got me one.
Before Pac goes, the PFL, former Bellator champ Andrei Koreshkov takes on KO artist Magomed Umalatov.
I nailed both.
These guys must fight because their names are so damn hard to say.
Yeah, 2022 PFL world champ Brendan Lachnane looks to start his season with a bang versus Pedro Carvalho. Former interim Bellator champ Logan Storlie
fights the undefeated Shamil Musegev.
And the 2023 PFL finalist Gabriel Braga
looks to start his season off strong
versus Justin Gonzalez.
The PFL season continues in Chicago this Friday,
April 19th with the main card live at 9.30 p.m. Eastern
on ESPN and ESPN+.
Get your tickets now.
Shout out to Lao Chan. Oh, big shout out, Lao Chan. PFL man.30 p.m. Eastern on ESPN and ESPN+. Get your tickets now. Shout-out to Loud Sean.
Oh, big shout-out, Loud Sean.
He's our guy.
He's our guy.
Keep down.
Okay, Pat.
Wait, what injury are you still working with?
Torn labrum and fractured shoulder.
How are you going to shoot?
One-handed, baby.
Are you lefty?
Oh, I didn't know that.
Okay.
All right.
What?
Was that a dumb question?
No, not at all.
What's Brandon saying?
I got to shoot one hand.
I don't know what Brandon is saying.
What are you saying?
Let's go.
I just go and the clock starts running off.
Was that bigotry, Brandon?
I was going to say three to one.
Huh?
Was that bigotry you were just doing?
No.
Were you just trying on some bigotry?
I was not trying it on. You did a bigotry. I did not. Full bigotry you were just doing? No. Were you just trying on some bigotry? I was not trying at all.
You did a bigotry.
I did not.
Full bigotry.
That wasn't...
Bigot.
You bigot.
You bigot.
It starts when I start.
He's going to say three, two, one.
You're going to pick up the bag.
You're going to throw the fucking bag in.
Hey, watch the tone.
Watch the tone.
I don't want to do it anymore.
Yeah.
I respect your decision, Pat.
Brandon the bigot. All right. Here we go. respect your decision, Pat. Brandon the bigot.
Here we go.
Three, two, one.
Go.
All right.
Lefty.
Oh, no, no, no.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Oh, man.
Just have it slam down.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.. Oh no.
There it is, there it is, there it is. Oh no, soccer. Drilla.
Right in his fucking face.
Yes! Yes!
Wow, short side too, that's tough. Are we sure he's gay?
Football, football, football.
Is he going to do a handoff to the bottle?
Oh my god.
Revoke the gay card.
Oh no, this is tough.
Oh my no. This is tough. Oh!
Oh, my God.
Go, go, go.
Put your ball down.
With one hand.
Oh, because his shoulders hurt.
Yeah, no.
His shoulders fucked up.
But he's such a good hooper.
It doesn't matter.
Oh, he's nice.
Keep shooting.
Keep shooting.
Load up.
Load up right away.
Oh. Watch your shot.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh.
Legs, legs, legs.
What's happening?
He's shooting one handed.
It's kind of tough.
Yeah, it's got to be.
His degree of difficulty is high.
He literally, he said he can't lift his shoulder above, or his arm.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be.
He's got to be. He's got to be. He's got to be. He's got to be. He's got to be. His degree of difficulty is high.
He literally said he can't lift his shoulder above his arm.
There it is.
Come, come, come, come.
Come on, Pat.
Great times.
All right, let's go.
Get into it. I'll be on that.
All right.
Okay.
Leonardo DiCaprio movies.
Five MLB teams in California.
What am I doing?
Anything.
Any of these?
Five MLB teams in California. What am I doing? Anything. Any of these? Five MLB teams in California.
One planet in our solar system to spin counterclockwise.
Hardest one.
Just name Leo.
Saturn, Pluto.
You don't have to go in order.
Oh, you don't have to go in order.
Just any of them.
Five MLB teams in California.
You got that.
Five MLB teams?
In California, baseball.
I know.
I'm like drawing.
This is really fucking tough.
No, it's not.
Eight playable characters in Super Mario Kart. Hold on. Everyone is really no it's not eight playable characters in
super mario kart hold on everyone shut up shut up eight playable characters in super mario kart
peach mario luigi wario bowser toad yoji uh yoshi oh fuck who's the other one
wario did i say wario play with your typist y- Y-O-S-H-I. What's that?
Wario.
Oh, Donkey Kong.
That's eight, right?
Yeah.
Now I can just go to any other one?
Anything.
Seven winners of the first seven seasons of American Idol.
Oh, my God.
Kelly Clarkson, Ruben Studdard.
There you go.
I have to get everything. Done.
250.
That's fucking good. Yes. 250 have to get everything. Done. 250. That's fucking good.
Yes.
250 is a good time.
Probably top 10.
Easily top 10.
All right.
Also, I mean, that's our fault for not explaining it,
but we thought you knew because you said,
I'm worried about the sporkle.
I got it a little bit,
but I didn't know the official rules of sporkle.
That's our bad.
That's all right.
What is this?
Three most commonly sexually transmitted infections?
HPV, chlamydia, gonorrhea.
Come on, Pat.
Pat the mole.
Pokemon.
Kidding.
No, that was an awesome time, especially with one hand.
Once you get to the second three, you're like actually winded.
Yeah, you beat everyone.
Yeah.
Fights, Kirk, Jack Golke, Brandon Walker.
No.
I feel like I could have shaved off like 40 seconds.
Oh, yeah, you only had a chance.
Cornhole wasn't good.
All right.
Is he top 10?
No.
I said easily top 10
Well we gotta eliminate
The names that are double here
Yeah
You did 128
Yeah
Gia got 155
Yeah she was good
I'll show you the leaderboard in a sec
Her and Ryan Blaney
Alright
Thanks for letting me do that
Yeah
Of course Pat
That was fucking
I'm happy now
Very fun
That first shot was butter
Right
So butter.
Yeah, we got to get Joe to do it.
He would do it.
It would be great for Jeff D. Lowe, honestly.
Or really bad.
It might be bad for Jeff.
You're going to be at 14.
All right.
That's pretty damn good.
That's pretty damn good.
I was so happy when I hit that first shot.
Yeah.
And first home run swing.
And that second soccer shot. Yeah. You first home run swing. And the second soccer shot.
Yeah.
You can do a lot better when you're healthy.
I think so.
Absolutely.
You just have to blast it at Jake.
That's what everyone's saying.
Just blast on him.
I think we should change it up for the core Yak members.
How?
Why?
I don't know. Just keep no just what do you mean we should still do the
regular one but maybe like a marathon one oh i mean we have that uh mini golf hole too yeah hole
in one oh yeah what do you mean a marathon we could do a special show of one where we just
create one that's like yeah 10 minutes yeah I like that
that's a good idea
it's a really good idea
no it was a really
I was looking at you weird to start
I shouldn't have done that
the only thing that gets me off anymore is like if someone's
close to the record
or close to the worst
right you're right about that
anything in the middle is like, eh.
He's right, though.
What happened?
Nicky Smokes is... What'd he say?
Pat said,
do you guys want me
to come over?
I said,
are you guys set up?
And Vasili said, yes.
Then Nicky Smokes goes,
yes, get over here,
gay boy.
Laffy face,
heart emoji.
I knew he...
Heart emoji.
He's that...
He's...
He's flirting
So much suppression
Should I go hook up with Nicky Smalls?
Yes he's suppressing everything
Just slide tackle him
Like not being able to
Should we smash?
You meeting him and him not being able to just be like
Oh this is Pat instead just being like
I have to text him weird shit
With emoji I'm kind of into it This is Pat instead just being like I have to text him weird shit with emoji.
I have to acknowledge.
I'm kind of into it.
Yeah.
Every time.
Right.
Like it's working.
Like I get I'm falling victims like the smokes charm.
Yeah.
And I think that he is so sexual that like.
Yes.
Broward County boys just want to get off.
Yes.
You just take him behind the train tracks and blow him.
No.
And.
Should I blow Nicky's smokes? I think you should blow. Listen man him. No, Andy, should I blow Nicky Smokes?
I think you should blow him.
Listen, man.
I think I'm going to go blow Nicky Smokes. Yeah, I think you should.
All right.
He'll do it.
You should get a commission from his future therapist, too.
A finder's fee.
Thanks, Pat.
Nicky Smokes gave me his car to drive, by the way.
Oh.
With a heat custom license plate. You have Nicky Smokes' car his car to drive, by the way. Oh. With the heat custom license plate.
You have Nicky Smokes' car right now.
Tell him.
Wait, wait, wait.
Tell him.
Do you want to move it?
Well, he's got to take it over there.
Oh, you have to go to the place.
Ah, okay.
All right.
I thought they were here.
So you should move it.
See ya.
Block.
Another city.
Yeah. Move it into the. To another city. Yeah.
Move it into the possession of another man.
The Lake Michigan.
Yeah.
Just move it real quick.
Did you guys all see the Greg Doyle thing?
Oh, yeah.
We spent 30 minutes breaking it down on mostly.
It is the most creepy.
I purposely didn't watch it.
It's so creepy.
I heard it.
It's so creepy. Sports writers it. It's so creepy.
Sports writers are the worst people among us.
You're the worst.
I know.
That's why I know it.
Reformed now.
No, I didn't like them then.
They're socially awkward.
The Twitter era made them so much worse.
They got the verified check.
They're socially awkward, and they're very entitled,
and they think they speak for a city when they don't
and they're not.
They're just weird people.
So this guy is a local Indianapolis?
He was national, but I don't think he was good enough,
so he went back to local, I believe.
And then he just kind of sucks.
And these guys are like incendiary on purpose.
They try to stir shit up and they think it's their duty
to make people feel bad on the podium.
His last column after the national title game was –
Yeah, Purdue won with class.
Purdue lost, but they really won because they were classy.
I think it was literally Purdue won with class while Dan Hurley's an ass.
Yeah.
The guy who won a second straight national title.
Yeah, who dominated.
Yeah, play it, TJ.
I want these guys to see it.
It's hard to watch.
So, wait, before you, for the context, if you don't know Keaton Clark,
she does this thing to her family after games?
The hearts.
Yeah, and it stands.
But that's a very low, like that's barely even worth mentioning.
Correct.
Correct.
Hi. So that's barely even worth mentioning. Correct. Hi, Caitlin.
Greg Doyle, Indy Star.
Real quick, let me do this.
You like that?
I like that you're here.
I like that you're here.
I do that at my family after every game.
Okay, well, let's start doing it to me,
and we'll get along just fine.
So the question is... What? Yeah. family after every game so okay well let's start doing it to me and we'll be able to get along just fine so question what yeah yeah oh start doing it what does that mean you and i will get along just fine and he actually had oh another one that would have led if that was the top cringy.
But he had another comment that was cringy.
I don't know if you can find it, TJ, talking to the coach.
Yeah.
That was.
Yeah, there was a second.
Why were people laughing like that?
They didn't know how to act.
So shocking.
And they're all sports writers as well.
I'm giving the keys to that.
Oh.
What are you going to do with it?
Oh. What am I going to do with it? Oh!
What am I going to do with him? Hopefully
we're going to win a lot of
games to start.
Just ask a normal question.
Dude, it's so weird.
And he's one of those guys that just
sucks online.
Yeah. He's like, I'm a man
and I'm part of the problem.
It's exactly what he did. He's like, I'm a man, and I'm part of the problem. Yeah, it's exactly what he did.
He's trying to farm the other way engagement.
It's so fucking bad.
He went step by step through it and was like, I was in denial.
I was confused.
And then I talked to a woman.
Yeah.
Shouldn't even be giving him a click.
A woman set me straight.
Can we get a visual on him?
Yeah, I want to see what he looks like.
He looks like a menophan.
He looks.
Oh, come on.
Tell me he doesn't.
Maybe.
Tell me he doesn't.
I'm not even insulting him, but he does.
Yeah, that guy is just a terrible representative.
But he's also the apex predator of sports writers.
Yes.
They're all like that.
Yeah.
That guy needs to go. Yeah, he was like talking down all like that. Yeah. That guy needs to get bullied.
Yeah, he was like talking down to Caleb.
Yeah.
You're going to need me.
Do this more and we'll get along just fine.
You know what it is, Nick?
Never trust a Greg with three Gs.
You can't trust a Greg with three Gs.
I like my Gregs with two Gs.
At the most.
At the most.
It's fucked up.
That's, he's a sick fuck.
Yeah.
And then people found us some old tweets.
Oh, yes.
What do they got?
One was from 2010.
I'm not an old tweets guy.
No.
That's lame.
But he is that type of guy.
Okay.
Like, he would do that to other people.
So bury this pervert.
Yeah.
Everybody has an old tweet. But he would do that to other people. So bury this pervert. Yeah. Everybody has an old tweet.
But he would do that to other people.
Mine are all about high school football.
Just realized my LeBron column references masturbation, gangbangs, and oral sex.
Damn, I'm twisted.
That seems fine.
No, the worst part of that tweet is the last three words.
Damn, I'm twisted.
Damn, I'm twisted.
The worst part.
Damn, for the record, if I'm ranking sex, body parts,
feet don't make the top ten.
Oh, not a Jerry guy.
Wait, can we go to the first one?
Just realized his column?
Yeah.
No, you wrote it.
You didn't just realize that.
Also, again, gangbangers, oral sex, whatever.
Saying, damn, I'm twisted?
Ugh.
Yeah. What a freak and then they like people were defending and not many people were defending but a couple people awful announcing who doesn't like
us wrote about dave the story they wrote about was not greg doyle's a weirdo they wrote dave
called him a pervert and it put in it they're like there might be legal action
you can't call a guy a pervert?
you can't call a pervert a pervert?
a card carrying pervert?
you can't say the P word anymore?
the fuck since when?
he's being a pervert
that'd be a hilarious lawsuit though
if you can't call a pervert a pervert
there's going to be a lot of perverts
that go undetect
and it would be a great lawsuit too because they would have to read the damn i'm twisted correct yeah they
have to read all the tweets yeah damn i'm twisted and they're gonna have to get to the bottom of
what a pervert is they're gonna have to read the definition of what what was his apology he's like
i fucked up i got i got horned i was part of the problem he's like i've said this to
chuck pagano and still weird and and he's like but the thing is they were all
men they're all men yeah notice something
about those names they're all men
his stance is
I treated her like I treat all the men that
come through here it's my fault because I
should have treated her like a young woman not a young
man and wait he would say that to a man
he threw up a hand heart to start right
he's like and then he just waited for her to
respond and wait go up, TJ.
The other part, like this is the whole column can just be summed up with, wait, go to the top.
No, right there.
Where is it?
I think it's in the middle, right there.
One more line down.
Oh, what happened was the most me thing ever?
No.
Oh, there it is.
Sigh.
Yeah.
I'm known.
I'm sort of known locally.
Sigh.
Oh.
Conversations with people before asking brashly conversations.
There was a lot of time in the video for when he was like, first, let me do this.
I don't think he was coordinated enough to do the hand heart.
Yeah.
There was a lot of time in between.
Yeah.
He had to.
Well, he had to take.
Well, no.
I don't want to get sued.
The hand heart's not that easy.
He also still thinks the hand heart is why people are mad, I think.
Yeah.
Not the do this to me more often and we'll get along just fine.
Yeah, for like offering positive comments for our hands.
To your worst things to write out loud.
Sigh.
You can't write sigh.
Sigh.
Full stop. Or roar. All right, there you are. sigh you can't write sigh uh full stop or roar all right or or or i don't know who needs to
hear this but yeah oh yeah that one's pretty i did a thing i did a thing oh yeah i did a thing
so i did a thing i wonder if any of our co-workers have ever tweeted sigh i definitely have i can go
ahead and tell you that right now let's go ahead ahead and pick that up. But it's usually in response to
a reply to me. Yeah, you do one word,
sigh. That's fine. Okay.
It's not as far as saying
something dumb to someone and then they replying
sigh is normal.
Yeah, I'll do it like that. Yeah, it
can't be in between. Did you do any in between?
I do it all from the beginning.
You swear to God? Yeah. It's all that.
It's all in replies to everybody.
Damn, there's so many of them.
You're a sigh.
I'm a sigh.
Oh, wait.
Can't keep his breath in his mouth.
Sigh.
Yeah.
Sigh.
Oh, my God, dude.
That's a lot of sighs.
You do this all the time.
Yeah, I'm a sigh guy, apparently.
Sigh.
That's not sigh.
Shit, that's too many sighs.
Brand new.
Brand new. Sighs. See, if's too many size. Brand new size.
See if he ever did I did a thing.
I've never done I did a thing.
And it's him with bangs.
Oh, please.
I don't think I did a thing.
You ever done full stop?
Never done full stop either.
I don't even know how to use full stop.
Push your hair down and tweet a selfie with bangs and say I did a thing.
Sigh.
Thanks, man.
Damn, can I get the keys to that, bro?
Dude.
Here we go, see?
Never.
Okay.
Never, not once.
Has KB No Swag ever tweeted, I did a thing?
Oh, no.
Don't search.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa, shit. There's Motley Crue. Oh, my God. Did you see what White Boy Rick did? Don't search Whoa Whoa Shit
Whoa
Motley Crue
Oh my god
Did you see what
Whoa
Did you see what
White boy Rick
I did a thing
What does Rick do
White boy Rick
You can't give us eye contact
Nope
He is mad
He's so mad
Oh he's fighting it
Yeah
Titus looks so good
Yeah
Maybe Stephen Chay
Did I did a thing
Oh definitely
For sure
No he's not
I'm going with the
Middle part
He's not annoying enough
Which is crazy to say
He's annoying in a very
Different way
I am the LVP of my
Team by the way
Why
I should probably
Wait is that your team
Yeah it's
I haven't done
The only thing I've done Is found a girl In Chicago That's down to be In a sex scene Why? I should probably. Wait, is that your team? Yeah. I haven't done.
The only thing I've done is found a girl in Chicago that's down to be in a sex scene.
That's, I guess.
Win a dating contest?
Maybe.
Who's pounding her out?
It's a solo deal.
Oh.
Oh, there we go. It's a silhouette deal.
Dude, so I did a thing, sigh.
So I...
Thread.
Sigh.
Yeah.
Sigh, thread.
How do you do thread?
Stephen Trey has one sigh in parentheses in 2016.
Another year sitting at home watching the playoffs.
So I did a thing, comma.
There, I got you.
No, no, no. It's like this.
That's what I was asking.
As if the sigh wasn't implicit in that room.
I wish it was under better circumstances.
I'm going to add the emoji too.
Roan. That's all you need.
Roan's got sighs.
Roan's got mid-sentence size.
No!
Five? Alas.
I'm saying get away from me.
Ew, dude.
Ew!
You better be careful in my fucking...
City of Customs, Cy.
Just let me in your nation.
Yikes. Oh, Rosy. Just let me in your nation.
Yikes.
Oh, Roan.
Or when people go to a new city, like Houston, I am in you.
I'm inside of you. I'm inside of you.
The fact that cheese exists is weird enough, but the fact that there are different types,
Psy, things we do to manipulate, cow puss.
Puss.
That's actually.
Nah, puss.
Yeah, you're right. Yeah, I'm inside of you puss. Puss. That's actually. Nah, puss. Yeah, you're right.
Yeah, I'm inside of you.
Hot take.
LeBron is good at basketball.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah.
Those are the worst.
Full stop.
Just wow.
Or the clapping hands.
Just wow.
Just wow.
Just wow.
Just wow sucks.
Luke has a New York, I'm inside of you.
Damn.
2022.
Just wow.
Just wow.
How'd you pull that up so fast?
Oh, he's searching everybody.
Finn.
I hate Finn. Who's saying Finn?
Finn.
When they try to make a good point, they're like Finn.
It's like end.
End, yeah.
That one drives me nuts too.
I might have done that.
Finn.
Fucking McCool.
How are the responses to Brandon's doing a thing?
Probably hurtful.
Oh, I...
What?
The second one's pretty good.
Oh.
So I did a thing, sigh.
Thread.
Somebody responded, you win the internet with this look, sir.
No, they just gave me the...
Jesse McCartney. Nick just gave me the Nick Carter
Dude the bots are crazy now
Yeah
A friend of mine sent me a tip
That you can actually
Mute
People who don't follow you
Really
You should get rid of some of the bots
Oh that would be nice
Their tits aren't
always in their bio yeah oh they're saying things that kind of make sense they've learned to like
roast barstool person yeah or they'll like respond with enough keywords in your original tweet
yeah so how do you guys even navigate that pulling stuff up on the show like if you just do a scroll
down yeah it has to be quick on the trigger at At least you're not a pervert like Greg Doyle.
Oh.
That's good.
That guy's going to jail.
Yeah.
Crime.
If he just tries to sue everyone who's called him a pervert,
I want that bad.
It's the Streisand effect.
Has a brush ever once touched your beard?
No, actually.
Do y'all brush your beards?
No.
No.
I should.
That sounds...
I think if it's big enough, you should, but I don't think any of us need that.
I don't think I need to brush my beard.
This dude who I follow on Instagram brushes his beard every day, Hub Life or whatever
it's called.
I got to block a lot of people.
Hub's Life.
He lives the most normal life ever, and that's his whole point of his Instagram is not being.
I'm a 29-year-old guy, andxas have a beer after work and they're very
addicting i don't know why he just lives his life but now he's an influencer so yeah and also
we had a he like did a video the other day where he's like going to new york to meet my hero
and then halfway through the video it revealed anyone. Anyone want to guess? His hero? Yeah.
It was crushing.
Oh.
Actually, pull up the video.
Here, I'll find it, TJ.
Is it a... Yeah, yeah, this would be a good reveal.
Hold on.
Is it in the barstool world?
I'll find it for you, TJ.
No one guess.
Okay.
I want you guys to see it.
I think I might have been cooking with that fucking...
That cheese tweet.
The cow puffs.
I like that.
But what was the cheese that
it fucked with me yeah the fact that there's multiple kinds of cheese is fucking with me
right now there's there shouldn't be what how how have we gotten to that point that there's
multiple kinds of cheese you name one we can get rid of because i like all cheeses i know but i'm
saying like uh who is like okay we need to find another way of making this cheese after tasting
first cheese well we'll get funky with eggs, too.
We'll do all kinds of stuff with eggs.
But there's only one type of egg that's...
Like, there's different ways to prepare eggs.
Yeah.
DJ, pause it like two seconds in so you can't see the graphic to start.
And by the way, I do like this guy.
But this hurt me a little.
But I like this guy.
Okay.
He just does plain videos where it's just like it's very
therapeutic he's just like pours he's like i'm drinking coffee and then he pours his water and
gets in his car and he goes to work and he goes home kind of a nice life yeah you've seen him
i have yeah i found uh an accountant in florida that does the same thing and it's like the most
average yeah guy kind of nice but it's like this most average guy in the world. But it's like, this is...
He's just spreading averageness.
He's chilling.
Yeah, which is like, average is okay, because Instagram's always just...
Okay.
Yeah, it's always like dramatic music, too.
I like it, though.
See?
It's like therapeutic.
What's that move?
Is it hot?
Remember it said flying across country to meet my idol.
Oh.
He does that every time.
His idol.
Oh, God.
Can we make our guesses?
Yes, pause.
Pause, pause.
Darren Revelle.
No.
Ooh.
The fact that you're mentioning it has to be someone of that.
Is it... Keep going.
Famous A-list, B-list?
I don't know what list.
A-Rod?
Skip A-list.
Grant Cardone.
Keep going. Oh, Grant Cardone. Keep going.
Oh, Grant Cardone's a good guess.
L'Oreal.
Wait, what?
Barbara Corcoran?
Gary!
Gary! Gary!
Gary!
Playing cross country.
That was wild.
That guy, Gary V.
Turned the earthquake, wow.
Which is weird because he is the average guy and then Gary V is not average.
He's a fucking rock star.
Well, he's average, but he just has a fucking demon mentality.
Yeah, that's true.
He'll outwork any of you pussies.
Right.
Every time I think of Gary Vee now, I think of Kirk Manahan's funniest joke ever.
What was it?
When Erica left Barstool, he said they were deciding what she's going to get into,
and he said she'd probably just become Gary Shee.
That is good.
Damn good.
Really fucking good.
Gary Shee.
Every time I think of Gary Vee, I think of Gary Shee.
Yeah, I think she did get a new job today.
Hell yes.
So she's officially not here anymore?
Yeah, she hasn't been here for a while.
Oh, really?
She would come in the office in New York sometimes, though.
Still?
Yeah, just to shoot at Tank's Cooks or whatever.
Oh.
Let's do it.
A mon-je-bon-a-petite Frank's Cooks.
Do a little Pick Central.
Yeah.
You could bust it up with Clemmer and Big F.
Clemmer and Smitty have real beef.
There's some anger on that show.
I love it.
I love seeing Smitty be the cat playing with the mouse.
Yeah.
It's like so.
Did you guys see this?
No.
Clemmer stormed out.
Oh, stormed out.
It was a quick storm out.
It was like five minutes.
I saw Clemmer saying, like, don't talk to me like that.
Yeah.
Don't talk down to me.
Because there was another clip that preceded this, too, a couple weeks ago, where he was like.
Oh, yeah.
Smitty kept repeating himself.
Yeah.
That was awesome.
I know.
Smitty can really get under his skin.
He can give it.
Yeah.
He can really give it.
The question I was going to ask for Smitty had dropped into me was, I was thinking about this.
Put your hand up.
Can I just talk to you?
You can still shoot.
All right, Smitty, you know what?
I love this.
Give me your hand.
No, i'm good
no no
i'm talking and you're doing it if someone did that to you you'd be furious
in his outfit no no no he slammed it this might be my new favorite rivalry
deepest he's out of his bird you find the other one from a couple weeks ago?
Yeah, the other one is so good.
I love that.
That was the other one.
They have like a legit beef.
They don't like each other like a fever.
Awesome.
Did you see how quick the trigger was?
Like Smitty literally just raised his hand and Clemmer lost his shit.
Like that is a deep-seated beef.
The other one is Smitty just keeps on repeating it.
Like, Clemmer tries to ask qualifying questions, and Smitty just.
Smitty says something.
Yeah.
And Clemmer's like, well, what about this?
And he just says the same thing again and again.
And it just bothers him so much.
He knows how to pull Clemmer's string.
Oh, that's man.
It's so good.
I respect the fuck out of it. It's so entertaining. It's so good. I respect the fuck out of it.
It's so entertaining.
It's not a beef I expected, but I love it.
I love watching Pig Central.
Another one.
I'm here for it.
I'm here for this.
A powerhouse.
But the money line opened at $188 is now $170.
And the money, the money speaks.
We have 44% of the bets and 97% of the money, the money speaks. We have 44% of the bets and 97% of the money,
including most of the sharp money on the San Francisco Giants.
What do you like about Keaton Wynn?
The guy had an ERA of 4.8, I think a AAA last year.
So for everybody else who is listening,
I followed the money on this one.
So the money line went from 188 to 170.
It's the biggest underdog of the
day, I think, to get
value. And
44% of the bets and 97% of
the money, including the sharp money, is
on the San Francisco Giants. That
is what I like about this game. That's the only thing you like. There's nothing
you like about the matchup. So for everyone who's
listening, I understand. I heard you.
I followed the money. Did you hear what I said? I said, is there anything else you like? Listen to what I'm saying. Is there anything else you like about the matchup. So for everyone who was listening. I understand. I followed the money. Did you hear what I said?
I said, is there anything else you like?
Listen to what I'm saying.
Is there anything else you like?
So angry.
Don't talk down to me, motherfucker.
I said, is there anything else you like?
So for the audience that was listening,
anybody else was listening.
You know what the word else means?
Blockhead?
Anything else?
Is there the money?
Exactly.
On this show?
A little bit of a Sunday night baseball hangover,
I could see that.
Clemmer.
I started off saying,
I usually don't bet against the Dodgers at home,
but when the money actually didn't say that,
but that's fine.
Thank you,
Rico.
Is that much in one direction?
I am following the money and the money today.
I understand.
And I said,
is there anything else?
Could you repeat the money again?
Else.
Else.
44% of the bets. They're great that. I said, is there anything else? Could you repeat the money again? Else. Else. 44% of the bets.
They're great together.
They bicker right together.
I love that.
It's like a morning radio show.
I would listen, like a drive time.
It's almost like the cadence of like eighth grade bickers.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Lunch table shit.
It's so good.
Don't talk down to me, motherfucker.
Else.
Else. Else. else, else.
Oh, man.
I got a question for you guys, for everyone in this room.
I'm going to a wedding tomorrow in Philly.
You got some jeans?
I got a tuxedo.
Whoa.
Are you in the wedding?
I'm in the wedding.
Yeah, it's one of my best friends.
Where's it at?
I forget what it's called, but it's in like downtown, center city, next to City Hall.
Okay.
Went to the bathroom.
Crystal Tea Room?
No.
I'll find out.
Go ahead.
It doesn't matter.
If you're a fan of the show, swing through.
Say hi to Mook.
Yes.
And if I've ever dated you, please come by.
Yeah, they will.
They're going to be dating the bride tomorrow.
Oh, yeah.
And basically, I went to the bachelor party, dropped like two grand in Miami,
flying home, rented a tuxedo, got a hotel.
You still have to give a gift.
$20 for the gift.
How much am I gifting?
Well, it's not a destination wedding.
It's a destination wedding for you.
They're in New York. A lot of people are flying in from Austin. It's not a destination,. It's a destination wedding for you. They're in New York.
A lot of people are flying in from Austin.
It's not a destination, so it's on me for being away.
What's an acceptable wedding gift?
You're in the wedding.
Hobby Lobby gift card?
No, he's wrong.
You have to give as much money as you can.
Yeah, you got to do 100 plus.
100 plus.
It's your best friend.
You have to give as much money as you can.
My best friend and the bride is one of my good friends, too.
Maybe 200.
You have to give as much money as you can afford.
Yeah.
That's like $8.
Okay.
Then that's understandable.
You know what you could do?
Why don't you write them a blank check?
A blank check?
Yeah.
And just be like, whatever you want.
Or post-date it. Date it like five years from now. Be like, I'll be fucking with you. I would do my check. No, but a blank check Yeah And just be like Whatever you want Yeah Or post date it
Date it like five years from now
Yeah
Like I'll be fucking
I would do my check
Yo
No but a blank check
They
Okay so what's the worst
Is he gonna like
Try to bang you for like 10k
Well bounce
Yeah right
It's a gamble
Facts
How big can he go
Right
Oh
He'll have to get it
Right on the money
It just reverses on you
Yeah
Give him a blank check
Blank check
Big gesture
Yeah Huge gesture It's a blank check. Blank check. Big gesture. Yeah.
Huge gesture.
It's a blank check.
It's actually the nicest gift you give someone, but he probably will do like what?
Like $100?
Yeah, that'll bounce.
That'll bounce.
Yeah, right.
A move that I've done before is, first off, you have a whole year to give it, so you can
accrue funds, put away a little bit.
You have a whole year?
You have a whole year to give a gift for a wedding.
I didn't know that.'s that's a thing but i would uh give somebody an envelope of cash and uh but i would go all ones and so when they get the envelope if
they're like oh my god thank you so much and then they open it and it's like a hundred dollars but
in ones that's a great idea do the ones another thing you can do is you can just bring an envelope and some cash,
and depending on how much money they spend on the wedding is what you spend on them.
Whoa.
Right.
You take out-
Cash bar, it's like, all right, now you're getting $30.
Oh, okay.
If it's cash bar, you don't get-
Meals not good?
DJ?
Not a live band?
Okay.
Come in with a hundo.
Yeah, it's going down.
You take out $30.
Yeah, right.
Okay. Yes. Okay. It's a pay-for-play- You can invoice them by the end of the night. Right. Exactly. band okay come in with a hundo yeah it's going down you take out 30 yeah right okay yes okay
it's a pay-for-play we've invoiced them by the end of the night right exactly smart i could make
money off this yeah fuck yeah you're definitely good you guys ever been to a cash bar wedding
yes we we don't give gifts like y'all give in the south at weddings what do you what do you give
like livestock no i mean we go on the registry and we might buy, you know, if they need a place setting
or they need a microwave.
But I have never carried cash to a wedding ever in my life.
At my wedding, nobody gave me a goddamn thing.
What?
No one gave you money?
I think a couple people, like my grandmother gave me $1,000.
But other than that, like nobody else really gave me.
Where were you registered?
Oh.
Cracker Barrel? the local gift shop a bunch of rock candy rocking chairs no but we just i we don't
cash is the best gift to get i've never taken cash to a wedding in my life i give cash exclusively
for every gift it's the best gift and it's best gift. And it's best for both parties.
It's best for everyone. It's the cleanest thing you can do.
Let me ask you this. Do you take mental
note of who gave you what? Of course.
Do you remember? I don't remember
anything except for the person who gave the most.
Yeah. Which is who?
Non-family
members, my friend Josh.
And then when he got married,
I doubled what he gave me.
Wow.
You're going to big dick me?
Here's my dick back.
Nice.
Did I ever give you a gift?
You gave me a gift certificate to Mama's Fish House
in Hawaii.
You're not going to be in Maui.
You're not going to Maui?
Big Island.
Mama's is the best fish restaurant I've ever been to in my life.
Is Maui the play?
Maui's the play.
What is good about it?
Everything.
I mean, the fish is like the freshest Maui shit.
I'm sorry, Kyle.
Fuck.
Maui's the play?
Maui's the play.
Maui is the play.
Yeah, it's so fresh.
What was the...
It's like...
They have something special. Something with lobster in it. It's so fresh. What was the... It's like... It's something special.
Something with lobster in it.
It was so good.
Kind of creamy sauce.
Oh, Kyle would love that.
Oh, dude, it's so good.
It's right on the water, too.
I'm looking at the menu.
You should.
Yeah, look up Mama's.
No, it's dumb good.
So good.
Maui is it.
SVP put me onto it.
Wow.
Yes. I know it comes from the top of the top. SVP put me onto it. Wow. Yes.
Noah comes from the top of the top.
SVP's never even been to the Big Island.
No.
He goes right to Maui.
Wouldn't even think about it.
What goes on in the Big Island?
Pull up Mama's Fish Restaurant.
Is the Big Island Oahu?
No, it's Honolulu.
Honolulu is Oahu.
So yeah, you're going to the Big Island.
That's the Big Island.
I'm sure the Big Island's awesome.
It's Hawaii.
The Big Island's probably sick, dude.
Did I fuck up?
No.
Read to us.
I like to see cities.
Read to us, Brandon.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Maui does not have a city.
Wait, let's see it.
It's a mahi-mahi saute with walleyes, tomatoes, capers, and...
Look at this this
is what you look out on yeah that's what you look at peppercorn seared oh no pearl mushrooms
luau chimichurri and sweet potato maui is everything lehigh with what's lehigh lehigh
cj mccollum lehigh what is lehigh they got bucknell hawaiian stuff with crab and lobster that's it macadamia
anything stuffed with lobster come on incredible that was it that was what i got it was so good
we went twice oh man incredible yeah mahi-mahi sauteed see what's the third one? That's Lehigh. Lehigh.
Oh, man.
Yeah, Hawaii Kampachi is stuff with crab and lobster.
It's just different fish out there.
Fuck, Big Cat, just take us.
Kyle, they got a Bennigan's on the Big Island.
There's a Benihana.
You can get hibachi.
No, the Big Island's got shit.
No, it's going to be great.
It is a city, too.
It's not a city in Maui.
Can you go back and forth?
I think you could probably take a quick... I'm going to rent a car and do the tour of the island.
Yeah.
I don't need Maui.
Rent a Jeep.
No one needs Maui.
Okay.
Maui has the road to Hana, which is the most gorgeous drive of all time.
I didn't even delete the app, the Shaka app that gives you the tour of the road to Hana
because I just want to think about it from time to time.
It's fucking insane.
But no, the big island's awesome.
The big island's awesome.
There's like high-rises, high-rise apartment buildings and stuff like that.
Yeah, yeah.
I like that.
I like an urban visual.
There'll be rainbows no matter what.
I think the big island has better beaches.
Yeah, and that's what I prioritize. i want to get wallop by wave yeah people are setting
recommendations out the wazoo i have too many wrecks and i appreciate all of them yeah you're
good because in maui there's like there was like a surfer's spot that you like i couldn't go to
because it was a surfers and then there was no other like yeah there's treacherous waves there's
like no middle ground so you're gonna get i a human should be way more afraid of waves yes and the ocean oh yes yeah it'll get us it is
strong riptide and all that it'll get there's deadly beaches in iceland you can't you can't
even fucking swim out in iceland they're like you will die did you size up the natives the
icelandics yeah they as big as advertised they're're advertised big? I think they're advertised as strong men.
Some.
They filled out.
I was noticing they fill out the arms of their sweaters.
Okay.
That's big boys.
But they weren't necessarily tall. There's fill-out lifters.
They just lift to fill out apparel and not for strength.
But these guys, they didn't seem like fill-out guys.
They seemed like functional strength guys.
But they weren't Vikings.
They weren't 6'4", like Sven's.
Filling out a sweater would feel so good.
Oh, my God.
What's it like, Kyle?
I'm still new.
I'm still in the beginning stage.
Do you have sweaters?
I do, yeah.
Oh, shit.
Breaking news. Chuck's having a yeah. Oh, shit. Breaking news.
Chuck's having a baby.
Oh, yeah?
What?
All right, Chuck.
God damn, that boy got to it.
He just got married.
And he did it in the most Chuck way possible.
His press release.
I'm happy.
Hell yes.
When was the wedding?
New Year's Eve
so this could have been
a wedding night
well how
we don't know how far along
no they had the
active roster in October
you want to pull up the tweet
very Chuck
press release
the Naso family
one roster move
baby boy Naso
will be joining the
active roster in October
the active roster is now three
that's hilarious.
That's awesome.
Good for Chuck.
He's the best.
I was living with him when he first started dating her.
Oh, shit.
Before I heard them conceive one.
By whose call?
You can tell.
Oh, George's call?
They harmonized?
It's a tone you can only hit Yeah When OVA is fertilized
432 hertz
Good for Chuck
I'm happy for him
Chuck's the best
Boy, it's fertile as hell
By the way, the big island is Hawaii
Oh, it's called Hawaii
Yeah
Oh
That's why it's called the big island
So I didn't even go to Hawaii
Wait
Wait, wait, wait
What is O-A-H-O-A-H-O?
Where are you going? Am I not Oh Oh, Kyle's not going to the big island No i didn't even go to hawaii wait wait what is a lot where are you
going am i not oh oh oh kyle's not going to the big island no you're going to honolulu that's
actually better honolulu is not the big island yeah you're going to you're going to a good one
you're going to a good one and you go to pearl harbor right he doesn't he doesn't give a fuck
oh yeah really yeah the greatest generation Not enough big buildings that went down?
I think that's horrific.
I don't care to see it.
Got it.
Does anybody ever go to, I have to read.
Kauai?
Yeah, there's one.
Kailua.
There's one island that's like a hunter's paradise.
It's just animals.
Deer, yeah.
What are you hunting?
Deer, I think.
Deer?
Any buildings on that boy Luigi yet? It's not fair to hunt on an island. Deer, yeah. What are you hunting? Deer, I think. Deer? Any buildings on that boy Luigi yet?
It's not fair to hunt on an island. That's their newest one.
Right.
Why is it not fair to hunt on an island?
Because I can't get away.
Where are they going to go?
Deer can swim.
They're not going to get to swim in the ocean.
They're not going to swim 3,000 miles to get away from you.
How big is that island, though?
I mean, it's still a deer.
I'm going to be honest.
I thought Hawaii was just like all that shit.
It is.
Oh, yeah.
It is. Yeah. Yeah, so that shit It is One of the names
You're right, now you're dumb
It's like New York, New York
You got it
I appreciate you being transparent
Always honest with you guys
You'll be right by Kauai
Right?
That's an island itself, yes and that's like that's
where jurassic park was held oh you can bring johnny tsunami yeah that's where johnny tsunami's
from yeah she's beautiful they just got uh rogue chickens out there have you done some geo looking
at uh honolulu no i'm saving it oh you are for the real thing yeah or are you actually still
gonna geo look i'll do it while they're are? For the real thing? Yeah. Or are you actually still going to geolook?
I'll do it while they're...
Are you taking a driving tour just so you can map out a geoguessor in your brain?
He wants to see the high schools.
Are there powerhouses in any?
St. Louis, there's...
Yeah, they have some powerhouses.
I mean, every offensive tackle is...
Yeah.
They have good, good sports.
Good athletes
Yeah
Just in small numbers
Where does Jack Johnson live?
Matt is Yahoo I think
What?
Matt is Yahoo went to Westchester
What?
Did you think one of the islands?
Yeah I thought that was
The no, the man
He lives there It's actually a great joy finding a good The now. The man.
Bro, he lives there.
It's actually a great joy finding a good Hawaiian playlist and driving around out there.
I think there's a song called Wamalano Blues.
Moana.
Yes.
You should rent a car when you get out there.
I am, yeah.
Oh, nice.
Top Town?
Jeep.
Yeah, I gave Rome that tip, too.
Jeep.
Top Town. I guess I can I gave Rome that tip too. Jeep. Top Town.
I guess I can just roll the windows down.
No.
Get in your hair.
We're talking full JFK.
Okay.
Yeah.
You need all the way down.
Yeah.
Get a convertible.
Are you pumped?
When's your flight?
I'm very pumped.
Sunday.
You're leaving this week?
Yeah. What? Oh, you you're gonna have such good fish you like fish like that i love fish yeah fish hey yo you like
fish like that uh-huh so my that's the i mean everywhere else in the world you're getting
frozen mahi that there you're gonna get freshhi. It will open your eyes to mahi.
I'm happy for my boys taking vacation.
Yes.
Nick went to Italy.
Yes.
AB is going to Hawaii.
Mook's going to Philly.
Brandon goes to Milwaukee.
Mook's going to Perth.
Yeah.
Oh, fuck.
Let's schedule that.
I have that credit just sitting in my account.
I'm wide open past May 10th.
All right. So May 11th? May 11thth uh no I pulled out oh shit he's gotta go to Perth you should see about a girl pull out I'm I'm pulled way the
fuck out yeah wait how long you going for KB seven days five so when you back is that not enough no
that'll be perfect.
So you get a tsunami warning, you start getting a little bit. That's a good trip.
Five is a good trip. Because you get like
first day, get acclimated,
then you get that nice second, third,
fourth where you feel like you're in a routine.
Was this a spontaneous trip? Did you book
it not too long ago?
I
booked it on Christmas for Puerto Rico.
Oh.
How'd you end up in Hawaii?
I forgot about Hawaii.
That it existed.
I wanted to go to an island.
I was like, hack, don't have a passport.
Puerto Rico.
I was like, wait, Hawaii.
Oh, yeah.
So I flipped it.
Okay.
Better.
Good move.
Hawaii better than Puerto Rico?
Rowan, what's your schedule next week?
When are you here?
I think I'm coming out on, as of right now, I'm coming out on Thursday.
On Wednesday.
That was a good idea.
That is a very good idea.
When is Pat's, when's the Bucs games?
They play on Sunday and then they play on Tuesday.
Are you going to them?
I'm going on Sunday to Milwaukee and then...
Can I come?
I'm going with Stephen Che.
What?
When did that happen?
To the Bucs game.
We're doing a DraftKings activation.
That sounds like a lot of flying back and forth.
It does be.
Probably just stay.
Just post up in Milwaukee.
Just come on down.
Come on down.
It's a short drive.
I need to start renting a car more because it was a nice drive down.
Are you in Milwaukee this weekend?
I'm going on Sunday.
I'm going to Rough and Rowdy with.
Yeah, me.
Yeah.
So are we doing the Yak tomorrow?
We are until about 1.15.
1.15. And then we'll go right to the airport.
We'll drive to the airport.
What airport is it?
Midway.
That's the hardest airport to land in in America.
Really?
That can't be true.
It is.
Why?
A lot of people clap for the pilot when they land in Midway.
What about Kauai?
I think Midway is the hardest in the U.S.
Do you ever go on those compilations of the hardest?
A lot of them are in the Caribbean, the hardest landings.
The one that's like off a cliff?
Yeah.
Damn.
I wonder why.
I think it's because they have four intersecting runways.
That is exactly right.
Shit.
Wait, so Rond, you're going to Milwaukee on Sunday for a game,
and then you're going back
And then there's another game
Tuesday
I think I'm streaming
On Tuesday from New York
I'm not sure though
You could always stream from here
I could
I feel like I have something else
To do in New York
Next week though
Nah
I don't know
It's damn confusing
And then I think I might be going
To the
I don't know if I'm going
To the Pacers game on Friday
Oh yeah Cause you can just drive down confusing And then I think I might be going to the I don't know if I'm going to the Pacers game on Friday Oh yeah cause you can just drive down
Yeah
And then
I don't fucking know
Damn you're all over the place
The fucking clusterfuck
Well if you want to come Wednesday
Or Tuesday
Or Monday
That would be great
That would be a blast
I love being out here with the boys
And girls
Mostly boys Mostly boys It's cause Gaz is hoarding all the girls That would be a blast. I love being out here with the boys and girls.
Mostly boys.
Mostly boys.
It's because Gaz is hoarding all the girls.
Yeah, he is.
Yeah.
Can you do the NASCAR right?
Man, you're goddamn right I can do that.
Fuck yeah, Brandon.
How come the NASCAR names are so much easier to say than the UFC names?
Purchase tickets to tailgate with Brianna and Grace O'Malley in Talladega's famous North Park camping area.
Tickets for the Tailgate will also include general admission to the Geico 500,
a Barstool Dega t-shirt,
and access to a Saturday night concert featuring Walker Hayes.
Talladega Super Speedway is known as NASCAR's biggest and baddest track.
It's two and a half miles long.
Racing can reach 200 miles per hour with cars just inches apart.
You've got the likes of Chase Elliott, Denny Hamlin, Ryan Blaney,
Ross Chastain, Bubba Wallace, and more.
Make sure you watch NASCAR Full Speed on Netflix
so you can watch your favorite drivers before they take on Talladega Super Speedway.
Purchase your tickets now to experience a parcel sports tailgate
at Talladega Super Speedway featuring Brie and Grace O'Malley.
All right.
Good work.
Thank you.
Uh,
we're going,
we're going to Milwaukee right after the outcome,
driving up Milwaukee.
Oh,
you're doing that tonight.
You'll come tomorrow.
You'll come by the house.
Yeah.
I'm saying that.
Sure.
All right.
Check out that boat.
Yeah.
Take a look at that boat.
Mm hmm.
I'm going to swing by the house? Sure. All right. Check out that boat. Take a look at that boat. Mm-hmm. I'm going to swing by the neighbor's.
Art.
No, that, why?
Meet the man.
First one to touch Art.
First one to touch Art.
I can bring Art.
I mean, Art can come over.
All right.
Who's shooting who?
That was Jerry.
Jer.
Hey, Jerry.
Hey.
Hey.
What's up, Zach?
Jerry was doing an all-time stir of the pot.
I think he was the reason why Frank's team almost self-compusted.
And then Frank was like, I want to be on Jerry's team.
Yeah.
He kept on demanding a trade.
Yeah.
But they were writing Frank as the star.
Yeah, he is the star.
Wait, Jerry's team has all walked by,
and I think Jerry's on titus's team
titus and che and they're all dressed up and jerry jerry's not part of any of that no he's got he's
got a role he's got a role yeah yeah he said he feels confident in his role i'm so excited to see
these movies it's great too to just see everyone working like i don't know you don't typically
work with well it's just yeah it, yeah, it was just a,
it was like everyone like went to their corners with the whole group working all through night.
We didn't have any beef.
Mm-mm.
There was zero beef.
Because you guys weren't trying hard enough.
You guys have sexual tension.
Nikki smokes and Pat.
Yeah.
That's for sure.
It's very one-sided.
Yeah.
Yeah.
One of them's going to get blown. That's how it works, to be honest. Yeah. That's for sure. It's very one-sided. Yeah. Yeah. One of them's going to get blown.
That's how it works, to be honest.
Yeah.
You're right.
You can't blow two at once.
Yeah.
Well, 69.
Yeah.
Couldn't figure out a way.
My straight-ass mind couldn't comprehend that.
You guys were quick to pounce on it, though.
Mm-hmm.
Actually, Nick.
It would kill being gay. Actually, Nick.
It would kill being gay.
I would be... You'd clean up?
I don't know if I'd clean up,
but I just think the doors would open.
If you know what I mean.
Professionally.
If you...
A straight presenting gay guy
is such a fucking trump card to have.
Actually, I'm gay.
Everyone's like, what?
Wait, what if you did it to Pat Bev?
Can you do that next episode? Yeah, come out to him. Actually, I'm gay. Yeah, come out to if you did it to Pat Bev can you do that next episode
yeah come out to him
actually I'm gay
yeah come out to him
no cause then he would be like
what
he punches you in the face
yeah he would
he'd be like
well you said it that one time
so it's always true
oh yeah
yeah one of those
there can't have been
a ounce of joking in you
but if you were just
telling a story like me, my husband,
just to see his reaction.
That would be great.
I would do numbers.
Straight-ass gay dude.
Yeah, it is a superpower.
Plays so hard.
Anderson Cooper.
Yes.
Wasn't he in the closet for a really long time?
Steve Kornacki.
What?
The guy who does...
That's you.
Yes, me.
And that's why...
The guy who does the statistics.
Well, that's kind of funny now.
It's way funnier.
Especially because he dresses so traditionally straight.
Like khakis and a white button-down shirt.
But it's also just funny that the one nerd they let on the football set.
Yeah, they're just bullying the fuck out of him.
Someone do the High Noon ad read?
That's me.
Maybe spin the wheel?
That's where we're at.
It's got to be me the High Noon ad read. That's me. Maybe spin the wheel. That's where we're at. That's got to be me.
High Noon.
Hey, bring the Fiesta anywhere you go with all new High Noon Tequila Seltzer Fiesta Pack.
Fiesta, Fiesta is what I like to say.
The variety eight pack includes two new tequila flavors, blood orange and prickly pear,
alongside two tequila favorites grapefruit and lime
all of them are made with real tequila real juice perfect for any fiesta find the high
noon tequila seltzer fiesta pack nearest you at highnoonspirits.com high noon
sun's up i think jim toes endorsed billy football what oh
billy that was really good.
You articulated many of the challenges your generation faces by speaking from your heart.
You demonstrate more integrity and honesty than the challenger has been placed on third base in this race and can still manage to cross play.
Bravo.
Well, they have like an alliance against Mike LaPetrie dish.
That's Billy's, by the way, not mine.
He came up with that.
He's trying to do a little Trump.
Yeah, he's trying to do a little trump yeah
he's trumping uh they're trying to squeeze out everyone else except the one guy mike lapetri
they're challenging the signatures they're saying that all the other signatures aren't
legitimate yeah billy said he's going after the mafia batman yeah what are the standings
uh well it's it's, it's the Republican primary.
So there's Mike Lepitri is like the chosen one who has the boost of like the front runner.
He's got the machine.
Yeah.
Oh, Medellin Mike Lepitri.
He's really on a show.
Wow.
Medellin Mike Lepitri filed for trying to stop the election.
This time he at least decided to put his name on it.
When I got served a stack of papers,
he's now personally suing me to try to get me off the ballot.
Fighting back, but I'm going to need your help.
Please donate today.
He got sued?
Yeah.
Oh, boy.
They're trying to hamstring him with legal fees.
Billy said that there has been an attempt on his life
or a bomb threat or something.
Okay, that's... Billy said that there has been an attempt on his life or a bomb threat or something Billy will dramatize this
to an insane degree
but yes he was threatened
I actually don't know
he's taking on the mob
that's what he told everyone
PFT created this did he not
oh yeah
so he should have to shoulderer the burden Of this lawsuit
Yeah
It's
Play with fire
It is
He's playing with fire
Billy
And Billy is very passionate
About immigration
I had no idea
Has he like changed
His entire personality
Like off camera
I think so
I think this is like
Cause Billy always struggled
With like
I don't want to say
He thought What we do is beneath him,
but there was always like a little struggle in his head where he's like,
I went to a really good college and this is what I'm doing.
Yeah, he's meant for more.
So, yeah, I think he's taking this as his true calling to become a politician,
a career politician.
So, yeah, I think he's cleaning up his head.
But then he played in the pick-up basketball league, so i think he's yeah clean up his but then he played in the pickup
basketball game or the uh basketball league so at least he's still run have you noticed anything
is he acting too mature for some he's wearing a suit every day uh every day that i've seen him
even wearing a suit and he probably doesn't have multiple suits yeah no it's a blue it's just
his standard blue suit but like it's like late it's a blue, it's a standard blue suit.
But like, it's like late, it's like six o'clock at the office,
so it'll just be a couple people there.
He's there in a suit.
In his war room?
Yeah, in the war room.
So we're in there grinding.
Yeah, he said, he admitted, he said,
this is the hardest I've ever worked in my life.
Oh.
Which is good.
Yeah.
Well, it can't feel good for you when no when he's on pm for four years
yeah but other than that feels good but he's doing it for the people for the people which i respect
um a true american yeah i think i don't know i think immigration is an easy thing for people
to get on because they see the numbers but really it's just more more options
to buy papaya with cayenne on true there's there's so many options street fruit so many options for
street fruit yeah so many people that you can buy uh like candy bars from on the subway yeah lucy's
yeah great option he's uh yeah he's big on immigration and dudes can't buy houses which I like that it is good
But it also is very funny because he's a 24 year old living in New York City
Yeah, since when could ever anybody
I've relative I lived in New York City and couldn't buy a yeah, I
Know I've relatives who lived in New York their entire lives, and they have never owned a house
That's the whole kind of gist of New York.
Thank you for being my reference on my apartment.
Yes, I didn't think they'd call you.
Are you moving?
Yeah.
I still don't understand.
They actually called you?
Yeah.
They do that?
Yeah.
I put you for everything.
Everything.
It's so crazy because Nick and I were talking before,
like, what if I said, like, he sucks?
Yeah.
Whoever would, has there ever been a reference that didn't go what like a hand selected reference i got to pick
it right a reference should be going through my phone book stopping randomly yeah and if i was
just like oh no actually he's super unreliable and he'll never pay rent he's owed me money for
months yeah i actually just evicted Nick. Yeah.
I was Mincy's reference, and I said he was reliable.
Really?
Yeah.
Wait, they're calling you?
I think dudes just want to call you.
Yeah, that might be it.
I've been giving out your number, dude.
Who did you guys list for your references to get into college?
Oh, I don't even remember.
I don't think I had good rapport with any of the teachers.
Oh, for grad school, it was so awkward. I had to ask teachers that I never talked to. Right. It's like, you don't even remember. I don't think I had good rapport with any of the teachers. Oh, for grad school, it was so awkward.
I had to ask teachers that I never talked to.
Right.
It's like, you don't know me.
Right.
It's going to have to be a lie.
I'm a reference for Donnie and the country of China.
That's right.
You're his.
And Zah, right?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, Zah.
Zah's not here, but yeah, I'm a reference for Zah in Zimbabwe.
Yeah, Donnie came up to me once.
He's like, hey, if China calls you, I'm the VP of sales at Stella Blue.
I was like, no problem.
Dan, it's China.
It's China.
In that voice.
Daniel, it's China on the phone.
Yeah, I'm a reference.
I was a cosigner on Hank's first apartment.
My goodness.
That was scary.
Has anyone fucked you in one of these situations Where you vouch for them
No I don't think so
There's one person who used to work at Barstool
Who fucked me
But it was for
A bookie
Fucking six men
People can probably guess Oh yeah no not who you think really never mind
no no thinking does this person have a problem with this i'm thinking of publicity are you guys Publicity? Deadbeat publicity.
Publicity had a crush on me.
Oh, yeah.
What?
Really?
Big time.
How do we?
What?
She asked Roan, I think the exact phrasing was, so what's Big Cat's wife situation?
Oh, man.
Like, yeah, wife.
That's the wife. It's a wife.
You said it. Yeah, what's the wife the wife it's a wife you said it yeah what's the wife
it's a very funny way yeah that was interesting yeah what you guys could say the first letter
are they official name l no first letter their first name p yeah yeah
p so that's that peteber Yeah Yep Pete Webber
Good old Pete Webber
I should tweet that
Saying that it's the anniversary
That's always fun to do
I do it
I do it every month
That'll get nubbies
12 year anniversary
Swear to god
That anniversary happens
Every year
Every month
It definitely happens
Every year for sure, too.
Alright, should we spin the wheel?
Yeah, we gotta get going.
We gotta go dance.
Ron, can you show me the jazz square one more time? Because I think I've been doing mine
backwards. Oh, I'm not gonna be good.
Oh, the hands.
Yeah.
I gotta do that after I lift Brandon.
I wanna see if I set up the ball step change. Oh, the hands. Yeah. Yeah. I got to do that after I lift Brandon. I want to see if I set up the ball step change.
Oh.
Roan.
I could sign up for the Lollipop Guild today.
By the way, it's not Pat McAfee, anyone guessing.
That would be hilarious.
100% not Pat McAfee.
That would be hilarious, but Pat is a good dude.
Rock solid, good bro.
We're fucked tomorrow.
Yeah.
Because we've got to get on a flight, and it might be wet.
What?
It might be what?
Wet.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah, That would be bad.
Can Pat put a word in for me?
I'm going to wear Spurs to Tim McGraw tomorrow, and I want to wear them into the arena.
Can he bring them in for me and hide them somewhere?
Yeah, he could keister some Spurs for you.
Smuggle in Spurs.
You think that they're going to give you a hard time going through security with Spurs on?
Yeah, I think so.
Are you going to buy a new hat?
The hat's too small.
You bought a small hat.
Yeah.
It wasn't on a head on Amazon.
It was just a floating hat.
It's for Jewish cowboys.
Wear it on the back.
Damn.
You could probably get a cowboy hat in earnest out in Wisconsin.
There's farms out there.
Oh, yeah.
I found a Western shop here, a stoolie. DM it to me which is very nice good ass stuff western shops
expensive so expensive it's so expensive like their cheapest boots that you're getting are
120 bucks oh yeah they're usually like two or three hundred we've only shirts are all a hundred
the pants are all written we've only spent about $125 on our movie.
We have $500 on our budget.
I know, I know, I know.
I'm going to go get a $1,000 cowboy hat.
I'm going to ride a bull into it.
A Stetson?
I'd get a Stetson.
The way that they make-
I have to make it to my head.
Oh, it's satisfying.
When they burn the-
They burn it to shrink it down.
I've got to get to Colorado.
Let's just have one scene where we're wearing You see Usher's latest hat?
I can't say I have.
Bad hat from Usher?
Not good.
Are they trying to take down Usher still?
They tried to take him down in the first wave
but they didn't.
Oh, they did.
Him and Meek simultaneously.
You can't take down Usher.
Oh, Usher.
I kind of fuck with it.
It looks like your big Mets hat, Nick.
Oh, yeah, it does.
Is it padded?
Yeah.
It looks like a winter coat in a hat form.
Like a puffy one.
Puffer.
It looks like he gets concussions easily and has to wear a pad.
Yeah.
Looks like the stuff they play 7 on 7
now. Like a rugby helmet.
Yeah.
Alright.
We gotta go dance.
Thank you everyone.
Please subscribe. We'll see everyone tomorrow.
We're gonna send off
Yeah, that's the only thing we've bought so far.
We're gonna send off Kyle.
Maybe we should do a little luau.
Yeah.
I would appreciate that.
Okay, I'll get something going.
Some howlies?
Yeah, we'll get a little luau.
A room full of howlies.
Yeah.
All right, see you everyone tomorrow.
Bye-bye.
Bye-bye. See you tomorrow, guys.
Love you, bye.