The Yak - The Jake Malasek Dating Show Has Begun | The Yak 9-23-24
Episode Date: September 23, 2024Justice for TinaYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Spell it for them, B.
R-H-O-B-A-C-K, named after
the Rhodesian Ridgeback.
Yeah.
At Africa.
Beautiful dog.
Survivor week, so the mood is.
We weren't even allowed to say it,
and it was the first sentence you said.
First words you said.
No, the actual show.
You know it's a real program.
Oh, yes, yes. On television, yeah know program. Oh, yeah. Oh yes. Yes television. Yeah, yeah
Yeah, so here. We are
Here we are
We're not
We do have Jake Malasak's dating show that's right submissions to go through today correct correct how's New York boys oh we got some out of order stuff done we're on boy dad this
week yeah eye-opening oh nice what eyes is open it was oh crap like I lived here
yeah it was crazy to think that this is like the diversity the filth the sounds the beauty of the people
All all bundled into one crazy. I haven't been back You said you said I don't want to spoil anything but you saw races that you forgot about right crossbreeds like
Himalayan Brazilians. Yeah, I didn't know those and then there's like a whole there's a block of them mm-hmm
I had this like the typical New York experience
Spend too much money and get frustrated mm-hmm everyone's frustrated yeah got a chopped
cheese beat it to deep fakes of salt and pepper I saw a homeless pussy oh how
was it uh yeah stray I now cuz my mind is it was the homeless pussy that was always in front of the office pissing
Okay, so I saw it pooping once yeah the butt part the butt part of the you're not talking about an actual cat
You're talking about a homeless vagina. That's right. Okay. All right. That's nice because I feel like it's normally homeless dick. Oh
Refreshing it is yeah, I've never seen like an outdoor pussy Never seen outdoor. There's got to be a subreddit. Tej.
r slash outdoor pussy
Sort by controversial. r scenic pussy.
What would be the most controversial outdoor pussy like gazebo? That's kind of indoors. Oh, yeah
Yeah, screened in porch pussy is.
What is a veranda?
Damn.
Damn.
A veranda is like a gazebo?
I believe the floor has to be tile.
Right?
That can't be right.
A veranda?
A roof platform along the outside of a house level with ground floor.
I'll be on the veranda.
I'm into those.
That's not really a sentence that explains anything. No Oh there. It is the floor has to be tile
Was she right?
Did a rascal flats t-shirt yes, and what's there? What's what's their endured legacy?
Compare them wedding song
They have like a lot of hits, but I don't know if they have like the widespread respect that people of their yeah
No success they used to be in our daily vernacular because you there's two types of women. There's rascals and there's flats
What else did we say we were saying some good shit back then.
Are there flat rascals? No. Hey now!
That can be a little mix from time to time.
I went to a Rascal Flats concert in 2002, it was actually a Toby Keith concert,
Rascal Flats opened for 2002 it was actually a Toby Keith concert Rascal
Flats opened for us in peace and I thought my god Rascal Flats is my
favorite band that lasted about three weeks what what are Rascal Flats is that
their names yeah what is Dave Rascal like the B flats is it like a take on notes
or are they from the plane the lead singer is Gary something Gary V. It's good
It's Gary it's Gary with a V it's Gary
Buddy it is Gary now. Let me tell you what hurts the most
being so close
They have such good Danny Danny's here
Hey guys the rascal I didn't mind them they were they were fine, but they don't have a last remember are the
Her
Highway life is that's a commercial fun commercial hits they don't have any enduring hits
The wedding song that's the one you still will hear God bless the bro Ohio go back
Yeah, they are Paulo, how he's from you know what it is. I think they were oh, they're, oh, hi, oh, state are they oh well I fucking love rascal
Yeah, what hurts them is there was a new country duo dan and shay I came out years later
And they kind of sound just like really really but are they dan plus shay yeah, but that's gay. Yeah, it's plus
Yeah, having a plus separate your bowl. Yeah, that's twinkie. That's Twinkie. Especially when it doesn't each she's a dude
I thought it was a husband and wife. I always thought it was a husband wife. No, it's just two hetero dudes
Let's be Dan plus Shay. This is country Hall and Oates. These guys are great, too
I don't know like I don't know why we can't love them like we love
Other respected musicians so I was in an and Shay. I think their music sounds incredible
I was in New York once and they were doing Madison Square Garden
And I saw the big Dan and Shay truck out there and to that point I'd never heard of Dan and Shay song
I don't really know what they do. I thought they were Christian music
Is it kind of like Macklemore Ryan Lewis where Dan does all the talking? Yeah, they're the Macklemore of country pop
So Shay is just the producer?
Like Brooks and Dunn.
Not like, not in that sense.
DJ Jazzy Jeff and the First Prince?
Like Zafun Jones and Chitty Bang?
Well what about Big and Rich?
Well Rich was from Lone Star and then Big was just Big, right?
Always?
I don't know how big he was always, but Rich was, rich and now he's a he's a political influencer. That's right
But he's not our John rich. He's the guy that he stalks yet, and that's our John rich Kyle
You're right though cuz country pop it always is like oh this ain't real country
Oh, this ain't real pop so country pop just doesn't get any
Florida Georgia line is some of my most
All time that's how Sam hunt just gets by on being hot he talked he does he talks he does a lot of bartenders said time to pony up
He's like an auctioneer and a singer. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, a southern auctioneer is tough
Kenny Chesney just talks in his songs. He doesn't sing either that always bothered me that he just talks
He's deeply closeted
Hair on that man's besides his head. Yeah, he's bald it on his head to is barely sits. Oh, there's not a hair on that man's, besides his head, he's smooth.
No, he's bald on his head too.
Is he really, man?
Oh yeah.
I'll just go ahead and give you a life update.
I did go ahead and ask the wife
if my mane of pubic hair was a problem,
and she said, no, be you.
But that doesn't mean-
Are you sure she didn't say P-U?
Yeah, she said, oh, P-U.
No, she said, no.
No, she said, no said no her official words were
you're a grown man why are you asking me this and I took that to mean it's okay
that doesn't mean that she likes it I'm a grown man why was I asking her that
she doesn't like it she just doesn't want to make you change a lot of the
questions I take back from the yak to her get the
response is you're a grown man why are you what are you doing which isn't great
to hear anything it's like out of like complete apathy or she just doesn't want
to offend you could be that she doesn't want to offend me she's very nice
person you get one blowjob a year, right?
You text me when it happens, so I know it's true. Yeah.
You could double it if you shave it?
Would you go bare to double your head?
That's like a fucking mouthful of seaweed salad.
Yeah.
Is that deep?
I think I...
She goes deep.
I think she goes
All right, that was a mistake
Even when his wife's giving a blowjob she asked is it in dude you would suck to deep throat
Not be good to deep throw he wasn't that bad
No, I think you're the least you're the least throat fuckable oh
Okay, yeah, that's on me. I don't know man brought that up
Dude you could double your head professor quarrel
What's that from that's a it was just a guy with two heads in Harry Potter two faces I guess yeah do you get the pig with daily or
you get head it's a birthday oh yeah you called me yeah yeah well I haven't I
haven't really had
Used to in former life, you know I'd have friends where every time I fucked I would text them and say hey I just fucked I let you know so I haven't brought any of you in on that. Oh, let's start a group chat
They text him back. You're a grown man
All right. Yeah, okay. We'll do let's do it. Let's do uh
Say you wanna be in it. You know I
I'm gonna pass.
I feel like I'm interested, but I'm not.
I have trouble looking at you guys sometimes.
What's the?
I don't wanna think about Brandon getting detroded.
I look at all, most of you as genderless.
Yeah.
You guys are like Ken dolls to me.
You're all smooth.
Yeah.
With a lot of pubes.
If Titus leaked, would you like,
would you, would you Google it? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I don't tightest tightest leaked. Would you like would you would you Google it? Yes?
Sorry
How was your where'd you go this week I can't even keep up right now we went to Auburn
How was it? It was great
I love I love going to the SEC and going to the south because it just it feels better down there
It was hot as fuck, but Auburn's a good little town
Anybody ever thought about the time I've been Auburn. I've been have you it's got a nice little downtown
They got the drugstore downtown. It's very quaint. Oh, wow. It's very fuck. I gotta get there
No, that's their marquee thing the drugstore number one on TripAdvisor. When they roll Tumors Corner, Tumors Corner is a drugstore.
And the trees outside of Tumors Corner are what they roll.
And they didn't roll it this week because they didn't win.
My favorite campus I think I've ever been to is Vanderbilt.
I'll move that box.
But I also loved Knoxville.
Sorry about your loss, Brandon.
Huh?
Knoxville was cool.
Knoxville was great.
Yeah.
Great, great.
Went to a farmer's market there and I was really happy
Yeah, you lost I love oh, it was the fat off. I
Gotta be honest. I don't know that I lost it There was a guy in the crowd heckling me the whole time and he yelled you're a stupid fat fuck and I looked at him
I said you're fatter than I am and then
Then Dave saw it and said no, he's not and they brought him on stage So we can have a fat off and we had we both took our shirts off on stage
He technically won but even even do you win the fat off by being scared?
He I think he won the fat off by being so that's ass backwards. Did you do any activities?
You know activity well that that's not a
No activities, but
world no activities but he had a weirdly misshapen body and his body here was weird I'd rather be fatter and carry it well than be misshapen I think they might just switch guys. Get him up here. Get him up here.
This guy is just, oh, he's just.
Tarkov!
Well, he looked fatter in the crowd.
You always do.
He looked fatter with more people around him.
Wait, I don't get what you're judging based on.
Oh, he might be.
He sucked in.
He sucked in.
I'll say it, Brandon, you carry it better.
That's what I thought!
Right when he takes it off, he has the two little hangy downs that...
They go away!
He's got a looseness to him that I...
That's a little...
Okay, you're fatter.
Yeah, that's it.
He looks a little worse, maybe?
Yeah.
Look at your... Yeah, you're more defined.
Yeah, getting there.
What if we turn him around, he's got all his fat clothes pinned.
Yeah, all the fat.
So good college football weekend, bad NFL weekend I'm hearing.
I think NFL was just as good as college.
College wasn't great, you know, Michigan won, but it was it was OK. And then NFL was, I guess, OK, too.
It was fine. I don't think there was any.
Who's the best team in the NFL?
Is it the Vikings through three weeks?
Yeah, that's what I love about the NFL. It's so hard.
Yeah, it's the best.
If you were judging on points through three weeks, I think they have
they have the most impressive.
You know, they've been dominating, but would you be shocked
at the end of the year if they had four total wins?
Do we need an AP poll for the
NFL whoa yeah yeah well I think we do I think so we should we should just do our
Vikings would be number one although the chief probably came in number one so
Vikings would not be number one I based on what I've seen so far they've been
the most impressive team but they would not be number one that's still be number
one because they started the Vikings are like Miami yeah they'd not be number one. That's the chief would still be number one because they started the Vikings are like Miami
Yeah, they'd be like numbers. They're like, yeah, they look good. But like they're not gonna be
The chiefs would have started one and they would still be still be one
Yeah, but the Niners will have started too. They'd be like number 14
Yeah, the Cowboys probably started five and they'd be number 25. It's crazy. They just don't know
You never know like betting win totals at the beginning of year and I think not are just all gonna be wrong Betting NFL is horrendous. It's crazy. I just don't know. You never know. I like betting win totals at the beginning of the year and I think that's all going to be wrong.
Betting NFL is horrendous.
It's awful.
I only did two bet. I lost them both yesterday and I got to the point where I think I might just sit out for a while.
Why not?
I'm just going to say it and it's fine.
They just didn't do a good job of blacking out the windows. That's all.
Yeah. It's very hard to not look at.
You're right. Very hard.
I said, please black out the windows so we're not distracted, and they just did not black out the windows at all.
Not at all. Not at all.
Your words carry weight as 25th most valuable person at the company.
I don't know that I'm 25th.
Yeah, I want to do a show here with you guys, and I want to not focus on what I'm seeing but it's just like
It's impossible between between now tomorrow somebody's to black these windows out. What do you guys say? I'm seeing an opaque
Well, you don't have an angle. Oh, yeah. I can't really see anything either. I wasn't expecting the full nudity. Mm-hmm
I was rising. I was expecting you but
But you would have thought they would shave
first maybe you could look us in the eyes when you're talking to avoid
looking at the window hey Danny how's your day going good got here early I'm
still on the clock this week did you get out of your comfort zone this weekend
Danny huh I was in Indiana so yeah.
You like them?
Oh you went to the Bears game.
Had to witness it live.
What's your comfort zone?
You just don't leave the city area?
No, it would probably be like a club.
It would probably be a little out of my comfort zone.
Anything that involves, oh like an EDM concert is really out of my comfort zone.
Kyle took me to one the first week I lived in New York
Well cuz like I'm not normally someone who'd be dancing like this how they all do but if you don't move at all
You're a narc. What's your normal dance? I don't I'm not a huge dancer like sitting in a crowd. I'm not big dance
I'll sway but they do more than that. Yeah, if you're swaying. It's not enough. Yeah
Are you kind of sucks itself? Are you dancing in your EDM?
I haven't been in years. I'm over it, but now I'm kind of getting back into like the Brazilian house
Moe check Beltran vintage culture. I'd recommend it your second Brazilian drop on the show so far. Oh
Yeah, I've been watching
Jays, yeah, why Brazilian? They have like a funk to them that I like
compared to others
So your playlist right now is them and Dan and Shay
No, I love I just like that tequila song a lot
What's the tequila song? How not to?
Taste tequila. So good. I don't know it
So we wait Nick, what did you do last night? Oh, I went to Hans Zimmer last night
You went to the Hans Zimmer show? Yeah
What is that? That's the guy who scores like interstellar and shit
That was really fucking cool
That's like a- you got a trip for that, right?
Uh, yeah
I didn't. I didn't- I went and like
It was cool, he would talk about like
What went into each one
I- I teared up at the Gladiator score
So it was more intimate Between him and the crowd? It was the United Center went into each one. I teared up at the Gladiator score. That was sick.
So it was more intimate between him and the crowd?
It was the United Center, so it was me and a lot of them.
Damn, he was United Center?
Sold it out.
So he was talking to y'all?
Yeah, he was talking to all of us.
Who is he?
What does he look like?
What is his legend?
He's a German.
I know he's a German.
He's a German with a skullet.
Yeah.
But yeah, there was this Chinese cellist
and she was flipping her cello around sick
Was it like accompanying visuals that were crazy? Yeah, there's a big screen above them. What are his?
Worths 200 million dollars. He said interstellar and you said gladiator. What are some others?
He's done Batman
Pirates Pirates of the Caribbean was sick live and then no little movies a lot of Nolan movies
Inception Lion King Oh Dark Phoenix he talked about that
He was like this was a good song, but nobody saw the movie because the movie sucked
But when you hear the song which was sick doing do yeah powerful dude
Yeah, that dune the dune to where like the girls like ah
That like they had all these shrouded women appear in the crowd was scary
What was like the demographics of the dude I was like the exact average age that was crazy
I was expecting a lot older I
Worked at me did a lot of movies Wells Fargo when they did Lord of the Rings
Orchestra night. Oh cool. And so, but people left early.
I feel like after 30 minutes people were like,
all right, yep, that's Lord of the Rings music.
And like people just.
I would rather just watch Lord of the Rings.
Right, I would just go.
So there's a Lord of the Rings musical
going on at Navy Pier right now
and it's gotten horrible reviews
and I really wanna go see it.
You gotta go.
Yeah.
I can't do musicals.
So is Hans Zimmerman in.
Hans Zimmer, not Hans Zimmer.
Hans Zimmer. Hans Zimmer. Is he?
Is he saying like for Lion King? He's influencing
I can't wait to be king and shit like that or is he just doing like
the scores
Does that count towards it? He just does the score. He just does the scores. Scores means what? Instrumentals?
Yeah, he composes all of them. He's not even making the beat for Can't Wait to Be King?
No, he did, uh,
Ah, so when you're
He did that?
Yeah, and so it went right from Interstellar
That's so good.
Right to that.
What do you think's more popular,
that or the Pirates theme song?
So his number one song on Spotify
is the cornfield chase from Interstellar,
the cornfield,
driving through the cornfield song.
Huh.
2.3 million plays per month.
Per month.
People are listening to scores.
Like Billy football exclusively listens to scores.
I didn't know that.
I should listen to more scores, because every time I do listen to a score, I'm like, I like
listening to the score, but then I don't listen to it.
Makes you feel pretty epic.
Yeah.
Back in the DVD days in college my roommate would always
leave Forrest Gump on and so constantly the room was do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do Yeah, it's got made the feather a big thing. That's like the most forgettable part of the movie Like all its branding was around that fucking feather. Yeah, and it's just at the beginning and the end
But that was a score that you guys just say you don't remember it
I'm not the god-ass. Yeah, I just I just think you're not you're not good at verbalizing
Instrumental music scat singing that way. I don't think you did a good job of doing the score
instrumental music. Scat singing.
That way, I don't think you did a good job
of doing the score. Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do a box of gifts right here from where AJ and big justice they sent us they sent
us this t-shirt that's pretty good what's that committing that I was do you
know he's been saying he's been saying it wrong the entire time I think it's
double chocolate chunk cookie but he just he put but he just... He put the chunk first.
So we have to bring the boom.
So you guys can get in your box and
They sent us a bunch of them.
They finally posted their video from here.
Oh, no way.
How's it doing online?
Connor Griffin's a star, right?
And today we're going to be running the gauntlet.
Alright, so Connor's here and Connor's going gonna tell us all about the gauntlet.
Absolutely, so first you gotta start off,
you gotta hit a cornhole bag,
you gotta make one through the hole.
Then you have to go to soccer,
you gotta make one soccer goal past our goalie.
Then you move on to the Whiffleball home run derby.
That's easy for Big Justice.
Big Justice got that.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, you gotta hit one over the railing.
Then you have to throw a football through a hole over there.
Big Justice is helping with the illustrations here. That's good. That end, come back to this end, hit another three pointer, You got to hit one over the railing then you have to throw a football through a hole over there
That's good at end come back to this end hit another three-pointer And then you got to go in the act studio and answer some smorkle questions. I think I got this sounds like a big
Alright to win this gauntlet we're gonna need some practice. Let's go Oh, God.
I can probably do baseball.
Yeah, I can do that.
All right, let's see if I can hit the three for us.
Oh, jeez.
Good camera work.
Yeah, where's that going?
Bring the boom!
He made it.
I'm sure he made it.
Hello!
Boom!
We just have one thing to say.
3, 2, 1, boom!
I did not think that's what they were going to say.
Thank you.
Why are they showing them?
Never mind.
Yeah, I mean everything they do is bigger than anything we've ever done, so why?
I'm not going to question it.
I don't know if we're going to be able to pull this off. Ashley's going to have to give this a shot ever done, so why? I'm not gonna question her. I'm not gonna pull this off.
Ashley's gonna have to give this a shot.
Come on in, Ashley.
I bet she gets a boom.
Oh!
Yes!
Good job.
Oh, she didn't get a...
Boom!
Oh!
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Oh my god.
Costco and Barstool Sports bring the...
Boom!
How's his face look?
Don't let that Barstool Sports get a big...
Boom!
Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! the faces face
the
the
what is like I hate them again I like
when they were I hate what you're mad you weren't in this I hate them before
they got here I liked them when they were here I liked them for a week after
and that's all that video I think I hate them again
you're mad you got left out of this when they were here I liked him for a week after and that's all that video I think I hate him again
you're mad you got left out of this yeah even though you put in hard work you're here every day yeah grind and you're well respected they left you out of they left me out yeah I am a little
pissed they left yeah yeah I should be in that video right no fucking world where I'm not in
that video but I'm not there's a chance of 250,000 views and yet. I can't make it
Are you mad that they're stepping on your college football game also?
So they have this weekend
AJ and big justice day at FAU football no, I think I'm okay with that
Is there so is there audience adults or kids?
I think neither. I think it's just people
that work here. I think neither.
Yeah, it's just us.
I think it's just us.
They're going for the world record for Biggest Boom.
Well, what is the current record?
It's in Hiroshima. No.
No.
Yeah.
We're going to attempt for Biggest Boom.
Oh, they're going to have chicken bakes there for people?
Chicken bakes.
Oh, looks like they'll also have some Dumbel Dumb.
Are we getting Malisek?
Yeah, we gotta talk about the Malisek baby.
How are we gonna figure that out?
Is he here?
TJ, can you get him in here?
He's here, yeah.
So we have 25 entrants. How we will it down, because we can't bring the girls in this week because of what's going on out there
So we just need to whittle it down to a manageable number next week that we can actually fly in here as like the
Finalists yeah, I think five five feels right five feels right so we'll get it down to five
But how do we get it to five is the question. Do we just, and TJ said he doesn't feel comfortable
showing some pictures, so do you just wanna do
the answers to their questions?
What else, whatever else they provide.
Yeah, I think we look through here with Malisek,
maybe we, he watches on as we narrow it down.
He looks at their picture and we,
Oh, he looks at his own phone. phone Well TJ, I think you should only show
Send him pictures of their forehead or their chin will spin the wheel of which he gets I don't have any pictures nothing
I don't I don't have Jay had handled this okay. I actually like that he can't see yeah
Oh, so let's just go on their profiles blindly, and then I think we should almost kind of do
For it to figure out the top five how Clemmer does the baseball cards like this one? Okay? We've seen three so far this one's at the top
Oh, we see another one this one now, but like tearing them that way you know what I mean?
Malicex not picking any of them that have all the tools
Malicex Jake Jake yeah, I don't
Like that you sat in that seat with those shorts on that's a lot of leg
It's a hell of a lot of leg do you see mr. Beast sitting down?
He doesn't he I don't TJ do have you seen mr. B sitting down no
It was just like it went his legs he looked naked his legs went all the way up into nothing
What I can see him yeah having nothing weird and yes weird anatomy
It was on Twitter
It doesn't matter. I've saw it cuz I got tagged in it after I wore shorts
Yeah, well now I kind of see it yeah, I got I got tagged in it quite a few times
Danny just pulled his shorts down. Yeah, I'm getting really self-conscious. So Jake has anything changed since we last spoke to you
No, so you're you're ready for this. Yeah, I mean I guess I'm a little in too deep now to
What do you look you're not in deep at all? Yeah doing this
What are you looking for out of this experience? I have no idea to be honest
Okay, I have no idea what to expect. I've heard rumblings of Steven and Nick and Brandon
Talking about what they want to do, but I have no idea what the plan we haven't talked at all no I think this
week is just narrowing it down to five so that's the goal is five and then next
week final contestants when Dan's able to be on the show we will have more
physical events okay mm-hmm great and visual things but here I think how many do we have 25 yeah I believe that's
everybody back there right I believe that's correct yeah okay so change so
how present was 25 yeah are you one of them Brandon I'm not okay no it is all
females did the gay dude DM you guys yes? Yeah, yes at the Penn State game
Yes, he thinks you're really cute, too. Oh, yeah
Nice, but disgusting well. Yeah, I
Didn't I didn't get a?
DM from a gay Penn State dude I
Mean that's a little redundant gay Penn State, dude
So Jake you're a pretty picky guy with something so much as where they're from turn you on no
I it's not the it's not any sort of
What's the word?
There's no like checklist of things. It's like can't can't can't it's more of like a
You know it when you see but you have boxes. I have no boxes you have no boxes zero boxes
So I think we're gonna fly out five of the whores next week
Are you willing to
do like a
Mic'd up make out no well the more content is for content
It's gross, but like what if she wants to kiss you all right hold on that's her prerogative, but I what's gross
That's not no no
You're hoaring me out for views. No, I'm not this is gross
Especially when I when I came in here and I'm this I'm looking for this sweet
Love right and if you love her and want to kiss her that then that will be a bridge we cross
Did you think you weren't gonna but you're that that was a presumptive question saying you will make out on camera
And I will not me well
I think if we really vet these girls there's a chance that you're going to want to kiss one of the date each show. I understand
You're going to make out. He's not gonna make out on camera
I think he goes into a room and we just hear this here the time guys are growing the slurping
I will not be viewed as a piece of meat, but don't anymore
Her's a piece of me not you three years. I've been doing this don't you think it'd be cool to get your first kiss on camera? Oh?
Yeah, you think that's funny mark don't you yeah?
I saw a chuckle box mark. Yeah, I didn't say
You're too competitive you're too combative right now. Yeah, I saw malisec making out before so I can when was that
Made out at the box
Right after this trans person stapled their cock to their belly button mouse. I turned I was like that's gross and mousics making out with a chick
Remember that yeah, yeah
Four in the morning
You had a glow-in-the-dark bottle of Dom champagne
It was like it was like it was like a thousand dollar bottle you were just we got it was I don't know how it was just me. I can't
believe we had that night together. Yeah that was special dude. That was special.
Holy shit I forgot about that. They're now hanging trash bags on the windows.
Good. I wish we heard that it only happened as soon as Malasek walked in.
Yeah I wish I hadn't complained because now I can't see anything. Oh, there's, did you see Doug? No
God that rocks. Oh Doug said that's nice too. I got a good Doug pick the other day
We'll have to add you to our Doug chat. On the bus. Yeah. Yeah. What bus?
I felt like planet planet Earth. Doug in the wild. It's great.
How about you to Doug chat? Anybody else that wants in too into you should get points for rarity like oh no I do we assign what?
Big cat sent since Sunday Doug. It's like Pokemon Sunday Doug Sunday Doug's crazy, but you sent Doug driving Doug
I sent driving dog which like if you hold on to that
You could flip that, it's nice.
We should do Doug reviews.
TJ or Che, how presentable are these?
What do you have for us today, Che?
The graphics are good.
Shout out to DJ for getting them done for React today.
So what we can do is we can show the graphic
and I can text you guys all small picture of this
individual to yeah wait that's I like that only a tiny picture of her
Pixel do you want do you want like a picture a full picture like their face or just like a piece of TJ
Can we show them blurred?
I guess I don't have I don't have that yeah a real zoomed-in photo of their Instagram
I guess I don't have that. I don't have that. Yeah a real zoomed-in photo of their Instagram
Profile picture I think that's dicey. Well do we want?
All can we are these no they signed up, but they don't want to be a part of content I don't want Jake to see them at all. I want us to be the one I don't think you understand how men work
They do so you're saying it for the brains. I'll see the final five or like, but I want you to be the one. I don't think you understand how men work there. I do. So you're saying. He's in it for the brains.
I'll see the final five.
I'll pluralize that.
But I want you to trust us.
I believe, yeah.
I'm in for that.
That's fine.
I want this out of my hands as much as possible.
OK.
Yeah, I'm almost to the point, does he even
need to be here as we whittle it down?
No.
And I won't watch.
How about I'll be a man of honor.
This will be an arranged series.
How about we whittle it down.
You have one veto.
You can stop us from canning them but we decide these five you just sit here in
silence how do we vote on who makes it to the final five at the end or let's
give me a set of questions we get a golden buzzer ideal answers are so that
we can like no I mean I think you guys I don't want to buy I think this is a good
you guys decide and I'll just that's I think we should have
An excel sheet and do the tearing thing as we go
Yeah, like we just keep moving we keep shuffling
I leave I think we should eliminate here. Let's eliminate 10 today, and then kit che can you reach out to the remaining 15 and?
Have them can we like send in a picture the back there? Oh picture the back of the header or the sound of their voice?
Can we like send in a picture of the back there? Oh picture the back of the header or the sound of their voice?
Yeah, all right, we'll do voice tomorrow nice like it cool. Oh, and it's got to be a line from their favorite song
Yeah, or movie or like it has to be something the line has to be something that reveals something about them. Nice. I like your line from their favorite movie.
Yeah, because you're learning that about them, too.
Line from your favorite song or movie.
Or a moan.
I was thinking maybe tomorrow we would narrow it down.
Everyone picks one or two people to present.
So like, Kate champions one of these people.
Titus champions one.
Yeah, I think that's cool.
We might need a moan.
I don't want to hear. right the Sibian and record yourself
And just send it in just get that dog tomorrow. Are they 3d printing Sibians yet? I think they should
You have the technology the technology is there to print a Sibian
Imagine getting caught I walk in your place
Imagine getting caught. I walk to your place. What's going on?
I'm printing a Sibian. Pirating a Sibian.
Can I ask a question? It's a you straddle it and it makes
Exactly is a 3d printer
It's a it's almost I mean you said what it does in the name.
It's like a robot who manufactures something.
Okay.
I think it melts plastic and it goes like layer by layer.
Okay, and it puts it in the shape that you tell it to.
Yeah.
Okay.
They kind of suck.
But it's all the same material.
Dudes are spending thousands of dollars to make trinkets that you could buy in Chinatown.
For probably quarters.
Yeah, but like they always fuck up.
The printer will like...
I don't think the tech's there.
It's like the Virtual Boy when that came out.
That was bad.
Yep. That red ass thing. Remember the power glove? that came out. That was bad. Yep.
That red ass thing.
Remember the power glove?
Yeah, I had a power glove.
You had a power glove?
Yeah, I had a power glove.
That sucked too.
It didn't do anything.
I had a power pad and a power glove and neither one of them did anything.
Power pad was a little bit better but it just wears you out.
The only good tech back then was the light gun.
The light gun was great and that came free.
With Duck Hunt.
Yeah, they could have charged for the light gun and then they, whatever.
What's a power glove?
A Nintendo Entertainment System game.
You would put the glove on your hand and have the buttons on there.
You couldn't do anything.
They were going to make an accompanying movie with it?
Yeah.
Well they did.
They did.
There was a power glove movie?
No, The Wizard is the Nintendo movie and one of the big things in there was the guy got
the power glove.
Okay. Fred Savage was in The Wizard. Christian Slater. De of the big things in there was the guy got the Power Glove. Okay.
Fred Savage was in The Wizard.
Christian Slater.
Decent little movie.
It's actually good?
It's not bad.
I'd watch it again.
Yeah.
They're trying to go to California.
There's a little kid's twin sister died and that's his favorite memory is her in California.
So what does that have to do with the Power Glove?
He plays video games to get there.
Yep. This is Ready Player One I think. No, this is The Wizard. So what does that have to do with the power glove? He plays video games to get there.
Yep.
This is Ready Player One, I think.
No, this is The Wizard.
Oh, Pixels.
Come out in 1990.
Do y'all want to talk about what's on my feet?
I've been dying for somebody to point that out.
What's on feet?
No, thanks.
What is?
Oh, what is?
Yeah.
Those look awesome.
Zebras?
They look kind of.
I agree.
I think they're sick.
Yeah, tiger stripes. Uh-uh. Wrong O. Leopard. See look cut. I agree. I think they're sick. Yeah tiger stripes
wrong Oh
Leopard at zebra that's tiger
Tigers are orange. I know but this is a this these are the Tennessee State
Shoes and they are the Tigers
Those are like those are really cool the laces wait it says husky on the tongue does it and it's that's about the bodybuild type of the wear
Wait, one shoe says slim and one says husky. What is that?
Those that's that's contradictory. They don't match
That's pretty cool. And then one of the laces says Tiger Bell Tiger Bell's
Yeah, the other one says the boys the boys. I don't know the Tiger Bell's like is that like a stomping?
Maybe they're cheerleaders. Oh, I love Stomp the Yard.
Are they HBCU?
They are.
Mm-hmm.
I just... I like these shoes, so I bought them.
You're allowed, I think.
And I was very terrified of how y'all might react to them.
I'm pretty focused on the socks.
Yeah, I just...
The socks take away.
I, uh...
You gotta wear those with jeans.
Yeah, probably.
But I just kinda forced my shots there.
They look good, they look cool. Yeah, they match. Are kind of forced my shot. They look good. They look cool
Yeah, they match our black socks cool. Now. I see a lot of people wearing black so ever do if hip people are right
Well not the at the mid top ones thank
No, those are not are you a black socks?
I knew that I were the hell are you to say on right?
Those are I think people would say those are the least popular socks right now. They're out
Are you to say Conrad? Those are I think people would say those are the least popular socks right now They're out. What are black Nike socks? The black Nikes? Mm-hmm. Oh the Nike one. How high?
How are we talking? The like mine or worse is if you haven't pulled fully stretch
That's not hip at all from what I heard. Well, let's stretch your socks. How far up do they go? Oh
They got a lot worse yeah, you think so I wear mine all the way up
Hmm Kate all the way up. Mm-hmm gotta gotta leave something to the imagination
Yeah, no that part of the leg does stir the imagination I wonder what her knee
I feel like I'm doing like lesbian chic today
Yeah, I could be a gym welcome
You know lesbians love Will Compton
One of us do you think is the biggest lesbian fan base Kyle yeah, yeah, okay, I'll it's Kyle
That's probably
I've ever like wrestling. I've never like met one you never met a lesbian. What city are they all in?
They're in western Massachusetts.
Maine is a big one too.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Maine.
Yeah, they're in New England.
I feel like Colorado is big.
Probably Colorado.
Colorado is big.
So is crunchy an adjective to describe a lesbian?
Not really.
That's more of a mom.
Crunchy moms.
Crunchy?
Crunchy.
Those are the moms that don't they're not fat big into vaccines
Yeah, why are they called crunchy? They're like granola healing?
crunchy yeah
Interesting smell sec god damn it Kyle. I don't think I don't think I've ever met a lesbian either
What what I'm sure I mean as soon as they meet you they stop being a lesbian
What what I'm sure I mean as soon as they meet you they stop being a lesbian
Now there I've never like talked to a lesbian about lesbianism correct, that's what I was
Yeah, this is all they talk about right. I've talked to gay guys about being gay guys. Yeah
I think it's like a
You want to know yeah, let's get on some common ground here. Explain to me what I'm missing.
Che, do you think you could eat pussy better than a lesbian?
That's a great question.
Here comes your question. I mean, certainly some of them,
but I feel like the top of the top's gotta be the best.
The average lesbian, the 50 percentile lesbian,
do you think you could eat pussy better than her?
This is like when Usain Bolt raced against that Falcon
We should have a lick off
And can work on their game whenever they want
Well that well you can go to your game whenever you yeah, but like they can also like test
Yeah, I feel like it'd be it would be harder for me
I don't have everything a lesbian can do to a pussy you can as well. Yeah, but they like grew up with that shit
You're right wily old vets
You only had it went to your toilet you started late
until you were 12. You started late. I did yeah. Tim Duncan only started playing basketball when he was like 14. Yeah and he's better than a lot of bad. That's horrible.
That's a terrible comparison. Pussy licking. He's one of the best of all time. Yeah that's funny.
Chay believes he's one of the best of all time. When it comes to pussy and he
believes he is in the top 3% in the world. Best male pussy. Of men.
Yeah.
Straight men, yes.
Tim Duncan of...
Best straight...
You don't need to put straight on that.
I bet you're better at eating pussy than 90% of gay guys.
Yeah, I have to be, right?
You read that book on it, right?
I have read literature on it, but mainly...
Literature?
Wait, not a book. A website. You guys know that, right? There's a video on it, but mainly literature. What does wait?
Yeah the video right yeah
That's what I won in the Christmas party. I sent it to you. I know yes
Thanks, what did you win? Everybody else got presents and I got you she got a link yeah
Really beautiful night I had a $20 budget
You can get a lot of things che with $20 that aren't pussy eating pamphlets I
Got a I got her a nice bottle of wine not a nice bottle the nicest $20 bottle of wine possible all right
wait
you got a $20 bottle of wine and?
And a link.
A pussy eating video?
Pussy eating video.
That HR.
And it was on my work email.
Yes, it was nice.
He didn't even say happy holidays.
He said Merry Christmas too.
Salt in the wound.
All right, Malasek.
We got to find this girl.
Yeah, let's do it.
All right, so I'm going to text you guys without Malisek, obviously, and then we're gonna put
their graphic up on the screen.
Okay.
And you say we don't have 25 graphics today, we're gonna do like 10?
We're getting close.
They're just building it live, so we might, we have I think 20 right now.
Okay, alright, well let's start with 10 and then let's see where we go.
So I guess we can just pull up, as soon as you have a graphic, give us a graphic and we'll
discuss the merits of this candidate.
Is this gonna be like next or Jake has the ability to just go?
No, I don't think Jake has the ability to just go. I think it's 1-5-1 veto. And it's a save.
It's not a you can't throw somebody out, right? Mm-hmm. Oh, I get to say keep them?
Correct. Okay. Not pass.
Okay, let me ask you. Would you rather have a save or a strike? Strike. You'd rather say keep them? Correct. Okay, not do you would you run? Okay? Let me ask you would you rather have a save or a strike strike?
You'd rather have a strike. Yeah, what do we want to do save or strike?
Well, you have one. I feel like you guys are better off picking than I am
What are the categories we have safe on these on these applications?
These are the questions that Jake laid out
We have first name, last initial, ideal Saturday, describe, they can be as in-depth as they
would like, what their bedtime is.
Nice.
Okay.
If they want kids, yes or no.
Their profession slash industry.
What are their vices?
And then separately, which we won't show on screen, I have their social, like Instagram
or TikTok.
And if they've ever hooked up with Niggie Smokes.
Oh yes yes yes that was a no across the board.
Perfect. They're lying.
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Cheese Steak. All right. Girl number one. That's the picture she said? No, this is a
random picture from, and I'm not showing their whole picture. said no this is a random picture from and I'm not
showing their whole picture it's like okay off to a bad start a random
picture from what what is it what are we looking at we're just getting their
foreheads it's like Wilson so this is the girl Mary and this is great all right
what's your ideal Saturday depends on the season but I always try to spend
some time outside going for a walk drinking on the patio, etc
And then most definitely always watching sports golf f1 qualifying football or IndyCar
I think Titus might like this girl. She's a midwesterner 10 to 11 bedtime kids. Yes profession designer
You have any vices drinking and occasionally smoking offer
All right, what stands out there, Malicek?
Designer is interesting.
Could mean, you can design a lot of things.
Could mean anything.
I am fascinated by the F1 and IndyCar.
I don't know a lot of girls that like watching races.
So you're assuming fat?
No. I'm not assuming anything.
Occasionally smoking, I would love to know if that was cigarettes or marijuana.
Wait, what is the deal breaking for? Mar break marijuana is worse in my opinion really that cigarettes really oh, that's
Yes, well it for my lifestyle. I don't care if you like the occasional sig but
Become extremely rare the past yeah, and I'm not a weed guy
And then bedtime is that's a that's an appropriate bedtime so good for her cool. I'll talk to you guys. Do you love her already?
What we're not what's stopping us from seeing the whole picture? That's what I was confused by was this what she submitted or is this
I thought it would be forehead for him if we did pictures
We're not gonna do pictures for him, so we should see the whole picture
So what I'm stuck on is she is wearing a wreath on her head a Christmas wreath
It's giving modern-day American Girl doll
Okay, okay. I like she I want the whole picture. I think nonetheless a pretty northern hemisphere. She has a pretty pretty north
Yeah, it's a pretty north
That upper quadrant is cute it is the wreath on the head is that for a Christmas program was she I would hope
I think it might be
Was she a ghost of Christmas past?
You know how you like go to a homecoming dance
and take a picture in front of the homecoming stuff?
I feel like she's taking a Christmas picture
in front of Christmas stuff,
but she went extra wacky with the wreath.
Or she's like starring as Mother Nature.
Malicek.
Mary M.
Or she might be fucking crazy.
She might be Mary Magdalene.
The eyes do have a little hint of light.
Spikey is literally Mary Magdalene.
She has like Caribbean dark eyes.
Can we ask, did they submit these pictures or did Steven find?
I am picking them. Some will be slightly lower quality if they are private on Instagram.
So I think it's important, it's a big difference if she were to submit the picture of her wearing a wreath herself.
That's kind of different than Steven picking a bad picture of her.
That's a good point.
This is on their public, or sorry, it's on their social on there right, but this probably isn't making her hinge profile good eyebrows, too
I'll say well two of them nice arch
Mischievous eyes very seems cool. Yeah, all right. Hi. What do you think about me? Oh, she's so cute
You guys got the full photo. Yeah, so we're doing that okay off the off the jump strong start strong start
Good good bio. Yeah, goodbye. I like jump, strong start. Strong start. Good start, good bio. Good bio.
I like Mary.
So do I.
Mary seems like a nice girl.
Minus the smoking.
See, there you go.
There you immediately go.
If she smokes marijuana once a month,
is that, that's a deal breaker?
I mean, not a deal breaker, but it's like, It's worse than cigarettes? What's even the point? She smokes it once a month is that that's a deal breaker. I Mean not a deal breaker, but it's like it's worse than what's even the point she smokes it once a day
Once a day weed is a lot cigarettes like
Objectively our was deadly. Yeah, and they don't give you a toe curl. I'm more of a lifestyle choice
Especially with the word occasional. I think a life a lifestyle of occasional cigarettes is like whatever and the thing is like you shouldn't have to change for a woman
You should wait
It's not like this isn't about compromise. Yeah, don't improve anything about yourself. Mm-hmm. Nope just you stay the same
That's not what relationships are about absolutely not
All right, we got no girl number two so I would recommend you guys if we wanted to attract
Maybe just like have two or three in your head about people that you would want to okay
Okay, sure sure
Can it this next one is Tina are Tina are
I don't like a lesson for our Can it this next one is Tina are Tina are Tina are wake up eat work out turn on college football and watch the streams out
Is it wake up I mean that pissed you I
Hate a bitch that wakes up up eat work out
College football this out and you're out watch the sets about boat. That's like not even she mean watch our stream
She's watching our streams. I cannot agree out and then that's crazy suck that implies
She's hungry makes up and then immediately eat watch the stream. Maybe she lives by a creek Tina
Watch she goes to bed 1115 very specific eight she wants kids
She works in HR, and she's a vapor and she likes marriage HR
It's not that crazy this poor girl. Oh my god great bedtime though solid bedtime watch the stream
She has no chance of working out. Holy shit.
No.
She was like,
Watch the stream.
My ideal Saturday is waking up and eating.
And watching Brandon.
Yeah, what the fuck?
He's so torn because he hates that she supports his work,
but she has a good bedtime.
Oh my god.
This is gonna be awesome.
How do you feel about the vaping?
Would you rather a smoker or a vapor? It's mint the vaping would you rather a smoker or a vapor?
Mint more I would rather a smoker than a vapor she's I think vaping is stupid. You're weird with cigarettes
At least they look cool, but they smell like shit. Yeah, but you also have to do them elsewhere
Okay, that's where you have to be in a certain area to smoke a cigarette
You can kind of smoke weed and vape wherever you want in today's America
watch To smoke a cigarette you can kind of smoke weed and vape wherever you want in today's America Wasn't anything
Wherever you want you can really you can smoke weed in your apartment
You would never smoke a cig in your apartment gross you can't smoke weed in your apartment
Oh, you like the fact that if you could that you could smoke cigarettes in your apartment, but it's a it they- Well, if you could, then you could smoke cigarettes in your apartment. Yeah, but it's a-
What are you talking about?
There's more of a decorum.
You're making me-
With cigarettes.
We're two in.
There's not a decorum.
This is a disaster.
If smoking weed,
if smoking,
they both would violate your lease
or not violate your lease.
There's no world in which you're like,
your landlord is cool with you smoking weed
in your apartment, but not cigarettes.
What kind of smoke is that? Is that weed or cigarettes? You could smoke weed anywhere. You can you smoking weed in your apartment, but not cigarettes like what what kind of smoke is that?
That weed or cigarettes could smoke weed anywhere. You can't smoke weed in, Indiana
Yes
Is Malysac show
Yeah
He's not gay with Mark Titus? No.
This is only gonna get worse, because if you weren't here, I would have said those two appealed specifically to you.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
No, I like the first one. Mary was fine.
Okay.
Okay.
Also, the picture.
No, this is good content. I'm just gonna get very frustrated.
We can't talk how they look to him.
This is blind.
Okay.
You guys can give like a thumbs up, maybe
You think those are I don't think we should say no
She's out you know use your strike. Did you I've no no strike yet. Okay, let's keep going no strike
You guys do with this what you will giving you my opinions next candidate is Erica Kay photos in your
She'll probably sell 300 books
What's your ideal Saturday on a crispy fall day like early to mid-October Canceling successful shows Friday deal Saturdays, okay
Start with a brunch spicy Bloody Mary situation
Racquet sports Roll that into an impromptu bar crawl and watch college football
Bounce back from what I'm sure will be a CU loss
Vegetables With a USC win
And then back home on the couch in time to fall asleep during the late games
Bedtime by midnight, kids architecture and design cool. Oh
There we go. What do you think?
I don't smoke, but if I'm drunk I and come across a pack of those skinny Capri cigs can't say no
I don't smoke, but I smoke oh
God he's a fucking liar. No. This is this is cool
Erica Kaye yeah, I mean this is this is
Good good good um may I yeah go ahead?
What about the fact that she called it a crispy fall day and not a crisp fall day?
Crispy and just a fall day fried chicken is it more it's crisp. I'm not mincing words here
That's fine, Erica Kay. Good good graphic good profile. Okay solid never good to mince words live
Can't do it. I feel like Jake has like dad waiting for his daughter
You know him from a date while holding a shotgun energy right now. Yeah something. He's doing this to his own date
I'm very on edge right now. Yeah, something is... He's doing this to his own dates. I'm very on edge right now.
You are.
I don't know what it is.
Or three.
Sounds like you love that one because you have really no...
Well, I mean, there was nothing besides the lying that I found to be...
You're lying.
Yeah, you can't trust her.
I don't smoke cigs, but when I do, why would I smoke cigs?
She's not a regular smoker.
She's out socially.
She's at a bar.
This is his decision.
You either can.
You either don't smoke or you smoke.
This whole thing, we've seen three girls and every single one is about smoking. You cannot. What's up with that? His decision don't smoke or you smoke
And every single one is about smoking
What's up with that what's up what you asked about vices and
Smoking is not a bad vice. These are the only ones they can think of cuz there are no bad But it's not like oh every now and then I'll smoke and then I also do a little heroin
It's like I just I over under how many is too many cigs to smoke for a girl in a year if she's like
In a year yeah, she's like her she gets 30 yeah
What if she gets drunk once a quarter and then she'll have two cigarettes?
She has a certain then I think I think not the fact that I think that's fine to say you don't smoke
I didn't love if you have fewer than ten cigarettes. I just didn't love the I don't
I don't smoke that's I'm not addicted right yeah, I not a change over. I don't buy packs of cigarettes. I said I liked it. I said I liked the profile beacher fucking actually
I don't like I said I liked it long love with her damn it malice. I come on your side now
She's a liar higher next you can't marry her. I'm not gonna comment on the picture again also. Yeah, that's part of is I'm
I'm not gonna comment on the picture again. Also, yeah, I think that's part of it,
is I'm seeing the pictures of these women.
I'm seeing the pictures of these women.
Good hair, I'll say that.
I like Kate's non-comments on the picture.
Well yeah, but also Kate could see somebody
who is ghastly, and she'd be like,
oh my god, she's precious.
I'm being honest here.
I'll be honest, none of the girls are ghastly by any means.
No.
Nice.
All cuties.
Very cool. But a Kate compliment right, nice. All cuties. Very cool.
But a Kate compliment is...
You're virtually meaningless.
It's truly, virtually worthless.
Next contestant is Isabel C.
Good name.
Off to a good start.
Isabel, good name.
What's your ideal Saturday?
Depends on the season, obviously.
Fall Saturdays are for good brunch,
some type of workout depending on the Saturday in college football. Non-fall Saturdays are for good for good brunch Some type of workout depending on the Saturday and college football non fall Saturdays are good for brunch some type of workout
something outside in the summer like a street fest or something or
Something or a bar and a show at night like house music
Chicago so really anything she talks too much. I agree with you there Jake bedtime normally tennis. She wants kids
She's an event manager at Google get White Sox Dave on this you can teach them all about what do you even do there? Yeah?
Her vices just asked my friend that told me to fill this out hit me up, and I'll get back to you
I'm self-aware. I don't know what any of this means told me to hit wait. She's being involved
She doesn't even know who you are. She's being volunteered by her friend. Who yeah, that's my friend that told me well. She doesn't know what vices mean
Hit me up
Again this is like more of the same bragging about Google. I don't like
The biggest hater in the world. You're a piece of shit.
No, no.
She didn't have to say where.
You could have said event manager.
She's a bragger.
At Google.
It's like, all right.
Get off your high horse.
Get a load of this girl over here.
Hold on.
If you were asked your job in this very situation would you say social guy or social guy at
Barstool sports media he doesn't even put bar so I people ask me what I do at work at
bars like oh yeah I work at sports and then if they don't follow up I don't tell it's
very bright yeah that's crazy that didn't stand out to me in any way she was like she's
cocky she's cocky maybe he's really good at this. Yeah, maybe sniffing things out. We don't see yeah
Probably my god picture thoughts where I gotta ask you. Where's this picture from is she on?
Wait, that's my wife
Let's have cake. She'll never take a look at a noise. It's cuz chase taking a picture with his phone off his laptop
Because Chay's taking a picture with his phone off his laptop
Okay, cuz there's two things there's possible. She's got big tails Jake nice at least we know she sends nudes
All right the next contestant is
Maddie see Maddie another solid name. That's a cute name ie or why?
We'll find out which one do you prefer? Wait wait let's do it right now if it's not the one you want she's out already
I'm more of an ie kind of guy alright. Let's see you gotta be an ie guy
More of an ie kind of guy apologies Maddie F. Okay, okay? It's okay, Che. We forgive you. Oh
Never know he shortened it himself. What's your ideal Saturday going for a run with my dog of weather permitting?
Oh an outdoor activity and errands errands bedtime tend to tend to midnight. She wants kids and she's a buyer
And I mean she likes chicks to you serious when on an international vacation a few cigarettes. That is fine
You know like American
When in Rome, that's fine
That is you know like American when in Rome that's fine
All right, this is a very
Be in Windsor Canada very
Sizing like her international cigarettes if those are international cigarettes. We shouldn't have that say cigarettes, so let's amend that
When I'm in Tijuana. This is a very limited information. What is a buyer? But if she
gave more you'd think she's... No I know
which is like smart by her. Okay simple
she likes to run. Right to the point. She
has a dog. I don't know what buyer means. Now
she buys clothing for stores. She's stylish.
Oh cool. Or potentially like a media buyer.
Or a media buyer. Now is it an issue that she has a dog a two dog households a lot no, I don't think so okay?
Should be fine. Okay? How does your dog get along with other dogs very hit or miss?
Okay, very hit or maybe that should be one part of the how Osmo gets along with these women
That is a very hit or miss gonna turn into like yours mine and ours the movie how your kids get along with each other
Is that cheaper by the dozen no, that's been off Steve Martin
Cheer by a dozen is yeah, Bonnie hunt
Nice nice. All right who we have next Steve and who's your number one so far? Oh for the photo. I'm gonna say boy
All right, they can't all be
I'm gonna say boy you
Alright, they can't all be What you're saying it's giving and not looks wise but the aura of the photo is giving almost famous
That's you that's gonna turn these out. There were probably like
435 ish we whittled them down. Okay, like they all should be
Next contestant is Emily W.
Oh, a W.
Emily W, your ideal Saturday, sleep in, get in a good workout, go on a little adventure,
get some good food, and have a little nice in.
930 bed time.
She wants kids, a research administrator.
Her vice is trash reality television.
That's a good vice. Like this. That's a good bite like that's a good vice because it's not
Here's my question here's my question
930 bedtime and sleeping in on a Saturday is crazy. She that's a lot
You don't know what sleeping in that's a lot of sleep. That's a real sleepy girl
It's a really you don't know I don't know what she means by sleeping. I could never picture myself
I could never picture malice that with like a drowsy chick
Strong
And then she's what is she usually a straighter Jake?
What if she usually gets up at 5 and on Saturday she gets up?
Yeah, that's what she's I would probably list that then if that was she in her mind
She did she said sleeps in maybe that's what she means by sleeping in her 18 hours of sleep in on
She's hibernating.
It could just simply mean not setting the alarm clock.
Yeah.
Sure.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're mine.
I probably would have specified, but that's just me.
But if she specified, you would have killed her for...
No, no.
She talks too much.
Talking too much.
I've never once said any of these girls talk too much.
That was Brandon.
Sleeping in is pretty standard.
That doesn't necessarily mean...
My sleeping in is like 1.30 in the afternoon.
Yeah, but that's her sleeping in.
Shit. I'll sleep forever. She has a little sleeping in the yeah, but that's her her sleeping in sleep
I'll sleep as a little sleeping in she can come give you breakfast in bed. Thank God you approved her vice though
She's probably pretty great by you accept
Yeah, like she that's a troubled girl yeah, could you do a night in watching Real Housewives of Jersey
Oh, yeah, you could okay, so that's in your what if it was a show that you hate she loves would you still sit and watch it?
Yeah, I
Watched when I worked at the local news station in Roanoke, Virginia
the summer too much information of my sophomore year of college
Me and all right we get yeah
Me and the two saleswomen that were like in their 50s would watch Love Island every night
So I'm akin to so if it's a show you hate, you would focus on it?
Would you scroll your phone or try to finger or something?
No, I would watch it.
Okay.
Yeah.
If you care, I care.
That's beautiful.
Yeah.
We got a winner maybe, Brandon.
That one.
She had a good vice.
Good vice.
Uh, what was her?
Emily W. Brandon.
Emily?
Solid name.
What do you think, Brandon? React with an interjection, a sound? Well, let me see the let me see the cool
There's no way right all of these women are warranting these there are some very good looking
Get a good workout going a little adventure get some good food and have a nice little night in 930. Yes research administrator trash reality
930 yes research administrator trash reality
Yeah, you like her yeah, it was jake all it jake you know me. I don't I don't do ugly chicks. Yeah true I do I would lie to you. That's a good point. I trust you tight. That's a very good point a lot of beautiful women
Yeah, you are probably you know that you know that you know that about me. I do
Yeah, Titus has no vices like ugly
My vice every so often internationally if I have
I'll bring a six
Next contestant is Brooke see look good name Brooke
What's a bad name? You'll be we should have an intervention for Titus
Long walks on the beach no nuts included. Oh, she knows about you nice all right 10 p.m.. No
Financial analyst and ice cream that's not fat. Oh, this good sir this girl loves her job
What?
Too much! This girl
This girl is still
This girl
Let me explain, let me explain
She loves financial analytics
This girl loves her girl boss work
She's still stuck
in that mind of like
I'm gonna make all this money and I don't need no man
That's just her title!
No no no no no no no no man I know a lot of those girls. She put what's your job financial analyst period this girl loves work?
Which is fine is it because she doesn't want kids exactly
How do you know she maybe she can't have kids or maybe she's?
All I can do mark is go off of the information that I've been doing
That's all I can not what you're doing all I can do no
You know I'm making connections from the information that I have this is so much fun
10 p.m.. Bad time is good. I like ice cream as well. It is this is tremendous
And I like the name Brooke I like the name Brooke a lot and Mark's not gonna lie to you about the appearance of the road that light. That's a good point
I will not lie to you
Brooks a hot yeah, brooks a hot name good for brook
Badge is a financial and I'll get her out of that office
She just wrote her title Jesus wait. What do you mean get her out of that office?
I'll take care of her.
You want to make her a...
Oh God.
Oh God.
Kate, Kate, I'm so glad you're here for this.
Jesus Christ, Brooke, I'm sorry.
The one by the lobby, they're standing guard at the other one.
Interesting.
She could be your sugar mama.
You could live a great life with her.
Brooke was good.
I like Brooke. What if she makes, I don't know yeah a lot of money
I'm sure she does and that good for her. I'm just I'm going off of what I got well
Why'd you ask profession if that that seems to be the one this no no no no no I forget who it was
But one of the girls like house music and that was not great either
All right, if she wins it all you should make her quit her job
That was not great either. All right, if she wins it all you should make her quit her job
Give also, you know what point for Brooke point for Brooke didn't say financial analyst at
Like that, but what if it's what if it's somewhere that's not very impressed what if she's like a cashier at a grocery store?
Yeah, yeah
Then I'd be a lie. She'll be a liar. Well. You're a cashier
Should be a liar. You're a cashier.
That was Seinfeld.
Was it?
Is it a rememberable line?
Were you not queuing that up?
That's like, that's one of the big ones.
That's one of the big ones from Master of My Domain.
It's the ending of an episode.
And you're a cashier.
Ray, were you not doing that?
No.
You know what I'm talking about though, yeah?
No.
You're seeing a woman who's like, I don't respect what you do your community goes. You're a cashier
Fine all right
Who got next how many we done right now Bailey J seven
hearing them I have a
Bailey J bar hopping through the local dive bars with family and friends 10 p.m.
Yes nurse will slam on car brakes for any small animal crossing the street. That's not a vice
It's not a nice, but I do like that. That's fun and very sweet
She's the one who's lying cuz she didn't listen to devices
Well, if she has no vices, you can't leave it blank. Her vice would be if she like speeds up for the
Killing small animals on the street bar hopping with her family. I love that.
That sounds like Kate.
That is the perfect...
Don't...
She's attractive.
Don't be thinking we're too hot.
Every girl...
I feel like this law of averages thing, you can't have every girl be hot.
I've whittled them down.
Makes no sense.
So it's only at least like...
They're all attractive.
Wow.
You say you sorted out the uglies?
Yeah, Jay.
That's crazy. So the people that applaud... Oh, Jay. I know. You say you sorted out the ugly
So the people that apply
People that are watching that didn't get in I just think of the me's sitting in
There was an overflux you have to do it by a certain time the me's oh my god Stephen Che doesn't think I'm hot
You're but you're judging off chase chase. How do you feel about a nurse? He's taste no no opinion
No, I know a bunch of nurses. They're nice women
That was good, dude, I know
Some of my very good friends are nurses
Yay, Bailey J. She her advice is she slams on car breaks for any small animal crossing the street
You don't feel like that's a little pick me?
Yeah, I don't like that.
I don't like that.
We haven't seen any outlier bedtimes like 3am or 6pm.
9.30 was early.
9.30 is early?
Early.
9.30 feels about right.
It's like half time of the game.
She...
Going about half.
Alright.
That's early
on central time zone yeah yeah would you be turned off if she turned out to be
like a school nurse or like a busy all-night ER nurse prison nurse prison
nurse travel nurse yeah first nurse pro or anti nurse indifferent honestly that
would be that would be crazy to have an opinion.
An opinion.
Bit manager at Google.
Titus, why would you ask?
Heroes.
Weird question mark.
Yeah.
How could I possibly extrapolate anything from that?
I don't know enough about it.
Who do we have next?
That was six of them.
Next is Rachel B.
Oh, good name, I like Rachel.
Oh no.
Next.
Going for a hike with my dog in the morning, hanging out with friends and watch a movie before bed.
10.30 to 11. Yes.
Paralegal.
Bartend on the side.
Vice is drinking too much coffee and giving my dog whatever he wants.
What a sicko.
What's that face you're making?
You don't like the two jobs.
I don't.
What?
She's making ends meet.
I don't understand.
I don't.
Paralegal doesn't pay all that much.
It's a good job.
I watch Suits, but I need some legal help.
She's a handicapped lawyer.
I'm not.
No.
That's...
I know what a paralegal is. She's a Siamese twin lawyer.
But if someone in this room is a paralegal. Paralegal is pre-law school. It's not it does it might be pre-law school. I don't think you have your JD. It means you don't have your. You help an attorney.
The second job is more than fine. I didn't know if you were a lawyer yet. But wait if she had a good job and still bartend on the side it would not be fine. That is still a good job. It's probably like Saturday morning she picks up a shift.
No my point is it's more of a why are you doing that?
Oh, do you not like it because she's talking to guys at the bar?
No no no no no.
She just can't be alone in her own thoughts.
If you have a job that pays you enough money to live the life you want to live you don't
need to bartend.
Paralegal I did not understand and now I do so that I'm okay wash I'm good okay that was my
question and you're fine with bartender yeah I don't care okay good what was the
rest of it she's a dog yeah she drinks with her dogs and too much coffee well
watch a movie before bed would you like oh would you like to wait let opinion on
yes I'll see it I'll take a look at it
I'll show you the dog allowed yeah
breaking the rules on that's fine look I
got zoomed in to where zoom in on the
dog he said I'm out what do you oh it's
a dog yeah I it's one of its that's your
dog her arm yeah okay yeah no cute yeah
no nice just it's just a standard
standard issue dog really nice
There's nothing special about it cool
All right, okay thought that would the next contestant is Abby J
Bej
Hey, what are you doing? I hate that.
I saw the Spartan.
Hey, he said it.
Hey.
Oh my god.
All right, so sleep in, dilly dally, ignore my chores,
text every friend I have to find plans, get ready,
outdoor drink, indoor drink, 11 PM to.. To midnight yes nanny and private chef
Vice's nicotine and hating that's an awesome
This is a fun one. Hatings advice. What's so funny is that this would be my strike if you guys were gonna
Like so far. This would be my ex
Why what do you mean? She's a private? This would have been my my striva chef
Billy Daly off the bat
I hated and you don't like the way I eat it don't like the I saw you
She likes hating you guys could you guys that is a round of my dinner?
Okay, sitting down at night and getting yeah, there'll be so much text every time okay sitting down with a private chef at night
And yeah, why would you want to be alone with a private chef?
I had the best man him for a girl. Yeah, that's any in private chef or ideal. Yeah
Yeah, that is a great point Danny Danny and private chef. I do only two jobs a woman. It's Billy Daly
Billy Daly
And ignore my chores do you think she has a messy apartment? What does that mean that?
Procrastinate a little she likes Saturday
That? She likes to procrastinate a little.
She likes to just relax.
Saturday.
Yeah, Saturday.
Mal, do you want to strike?
No, I can't.
I can't.
I got to save it.
OK.
This is the naughtiest one so far.
Yeah.
Nick Catena hates it.
That's awesome.
That's awesome.
That's kind of what I do.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Yeah, it is kind of what I do.
Private chef and nanny.
Dilly Dally.
Good with kids and makes good food.
Yeah.
All right.
And I'll say it off the face a little minx alert
Let me see that I'm just saying there's a little bit of west all right, so there's Abby mmm a bit of zest
Is this I like her?
All right, take me they've been good good. Yeah, there's nothing there's nothing you have to worry about there cool
Alright, Abby. Sorry for saying dilly-dally was a deal-breaker, but do you mean it?
What if she said it to you like you heard her verbalize that?
What all I do is dilly-dally in the mornings?
What if you're like you're like you wanted to sleep in 15 minutes you say he's an insane man
You wanted to sleep in for 15 minutes
You didn't tell her that though and she got up and she had coffee and she says quit your dilly dallying let's start our day. Yeah I don't know why but seeing it in writing
was way worse than you were going to have. What if I think a southern accent would make
it better? I'd just dilly dally. She's hot and she didn't. I'm just going to dilly dally.
I don't know if the accent did to me. Dilly dally?
Yeah. No I'm down for that. Alright no strikes yet. Through eight.
I don't think you would make it through eight with no strikes yet through it i think you make it through a window strikes
uh... next is
taylor each
you could work on your now server
and
uh...
all
important a lot of
all right
over here.
Sleep in a little, go for a run.
See what this little pork roll has to offer.
Unrealistic parlays.
Head over to MSU for some tailgating.
Get to the stadium early.
Ideally, it's low 70s sunny and the Spartans win.
Finish the night out on the boat or maybe a little game night.
11 to 1130.
She wants kids.
Interior designer, part-time Red Wings fan experience team. Don't smoke or really drink that much, so I
don't know, probably gambling and energy drinks. Is this is
this girl in college? No. Well, no. Maybe she heads over to
MSU. So maybe went there. Okay. Notice how she put the boat.
That implies she has a boat. Oh,, oh let me see hold on hold on
You're not gonna fool me with these noises. There's no way this is true um
Interior designer part-time Red Wings fan experience team okay, is that bragging no Jake it kind of is no no look at Mark Jake
I'm not the pick you've done this for every girl. Yeah, I haven't done it for every girl as a chaser
I had done it for every girl
All right, well we like Taylor then fuck yeah, what do you mean to do? What if she's a bitch though?
Yeah, I don't know. Do you think there's a chance she is?
Interior design that's really
Let's talk this out you think interior designer is a high chance of bitching. Yeah, I think so why you know better than people, okay?
Yeah, yeah, let me decorate your house
Oh my god, we like to know you like Taylor we like Taylor we like I
Want jake arrest all about?
So far so good. I mean I haven't really I know I'm I know I've been making comments. This is this is
Exceeding my expectations at the moment. I'm shocked by this to be honest
Shout out all these lovely ladies. We're like halfway done. Do we want to roll through the rest?
We want to hold some of these for let's roll through the rest and then we can figure out different angles tomorrow. Tomorrow we'll do
prompts. We'll send out ten I think we
we get it down to ten we get
voices tomorrow. I like that.
Maybe we do blind voice.
A lot of these are redundant I want
to really get a peek at who they are. Yeah.
How about this?
Voice and photo of their
room. Ooh.
That's telling. Nice like like that dig that okay?
Nice. I like the way you said Nick. You're a smart guy. I like you a lot. Thanks, man. I like you Jake fuck you I
What are you doing? And I know for a fact you won't help yourself. You're Frenching next week. I'm not
You will catch me dead
You're gonna French French it on camera. It's not on camera. You're like camera. Yes, just like French
Yeah like that if that's how you kiss sure it is I've seen oh
Like a dog interesting all right you had both hands on the back of her head which I thought was weird
No actually had one hand behind your own head. Both hands behind his own head. That was a vice.
Nick cranked my back.
Anyway.
Who we got next?
Alright, next contestant is Sarah P.
Sarah P.
A lot of good hair.
A lot of good heads of lettuce here.
Walk my dog while I'm getting coffee,
read, spend time with friends, watch my football teams
if in season, make dinner, watch a movie.
Straight to the point.
Midnight, yes.
Patent attorney.
Cool.
Oh, shit.
Reality TV, dumb Netflix shows, am Liam Paris 2000 2010s music
She's just telling you about none of those revises. Yeah, these are just but I do fuck with all those things right, but
She answered the question. These are interests, but I'm assuming if they write stuff like that that means they have no like
Yeah, they're lying about they snuck in
More where they are supposed to be telling you advice they're telling you good things about themselves
therapy devious I'm gonna leave out my crack cocaine addiction right vice is
supposed to be like if my parents knew I did this I would write that you feel
guilt right let's talk about she said I listen to music when from the era when I
was coming of age like a higher time I've been a lot I was doing now 43 a
decade of music yeah let's talk about attorney. Let's talk about it. What do you think I?
Mean she could have just said attorney are you yeah, are you annoyed she specified no
but
but patent attorney sounds like it's a it's a I
Like that she got specific
I Like that she got specific
Yeah, I feel like you did that on other people no no no no no no when she said blank at Google
I didn't like that right because she was what's the difference between that and the Red Wings?
Because I like hockey
The pattern that's cool. Yeah good for you No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. I think what we do is, Friday, we will show you the photos of the girls you eliminated.
Yeah.
I am not eliminating anybody.
Right, we.
Well, no.
Yeah, you're right.
You're picking, and then you'll say, by the way, these are who you did.
Actually, we shouldn't pick.
You should pick based on the profile.
Yeah, definitely.
I think you picked that.
Okay, yeah, nice.
And then after you eliminate them, you see what you fumbled.
But I think Kate has a woman's touch. Mm-hmm. She gets to pick one tearing them
Yeah, you get to Kate gets to pick one. Okay every round a Kate safety, okay?
cool in
And how good would you feel Kate of that? Oh my god
Cuz I think you need somebody who you think you're gonna not like uh-huh
So malice like you pick nine Kate you pick one tomorrow
We'll try to get voices rooms, and then we'll figure it out tomorrow what we need next
So we're doing 25 to Friday we show the pictures of the girls you eliminated okay, and then next week if they can make it
Maybe midweek
They come here in person cool, so we're done for today? Oh no no no, I think we're going through all 25.
This is the best thing we've done on the show.
I love this.
Alright, let me hit this real quick.
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All right, so we move on to, whomst?
Next contestant is Miranda M.
Alliteration.
Alliteration aside though.
My ideal Saturday would be sleeping in till 9.30 10.
Go to yoga, afternoon at the pool with my friends,
home cooked dinner on the deck with a big glass of wine,
and then head to my favorite neighborhood bars
for a late night happy hour and drinks,
or a night at a baseball game and walking around downtown
after 11.30 to 12.30 a.m.
Yes, preschool teacher, white wine, and occasional blunt here and there. I love her. I
love her. This I would pay $1000 just to have that Saturday.
I do. To this weekend. Good afternoon. Yeah, that's that's
a fun ass Saturday. Mm hmm. Preschool teacher hitting the
occasional blunt. I love that. She's fun. She's creative.
She's good with kids. She's patient used to getting bit used to getting bit
You can take a bite
You've been silent I mean this one virtually nothing to like talk about on that one
That was very like
Great like I was just like a can I are you calling her a basic bitch kind of yeah extreme version of all of the ones before that what does preschool teacher
do for you nothing does it is it a red flag up no, but it's not like a plus
It's neither here nor there that was that one was very
Sure, she's great, but that was a very
Middle of the road that was the most descriptive one and like the least but nothing out of that was like white wine and eye-catching
I would say does that sound like an enjoyable day to you if you were to tell yeah
But I mean it seems like you know you think she just hit all the enjoyable day
Right it seemed like she like chat GPT cool Saturday. She's a basic bit and that's what we would in there
Yeah, so she's a basic bitch
My phone died I think preschool teacher would be a plus that means like a friendly personality
130 nurturing it's not
Talk to you and like preschool teacher voice. She's probably gonna dress and like patchwork and where the dirty dishes go yeah
You have a bunch of like fucking popsicle sticks of paste around the house is fuck that
Of his computer is killing me. It's creepy. It adds a creepy air to it
Yeah, it looks like we're looking at us if To be honest, if anybody liked helping talk to me about this,
we could have had some pictures ready for it.
Cook their ass, Jay.
It looks like we're looking at rank-
No, Jay, Jay, I understand that.
I don't know that you needed help to not take pictures
off your computer.
I'm not shitting on you for that, Jay.
I think this is going really well.
I asked plenty of times how we wanted to do this.
You said just go with what you say.
I had it, and you guys changed it at 12.03.
So you get what you get. you get once last time you beat off
Yeah, that's night. I'm gonna go right now
Go come that's like your Snickers go come and think about what you've done. I
Have a quick question
Yeah, would you rather be with an introvert or an extrovert cuz that she sounded like extrovert effortlessly social like
Out and about if I had if it was extreme one or the other yeah, I would pick introvert
Yeah, I think that's the right answer getting dragged to stuff sounds miserable
What if none of these girls pick you
That would be awesome all the girls get together and they're like
this guy kind of fucks with the socks on and they all agree and they all just stage a coup
yeah wait why do dating shows assume the one person is like everybody one
wait tomorrow voice picture of your room and one thing you don't like about Jake
from what you know yeah one thing that's bothering you
let's get real yeah Let's get fucking real.
We're back.
Be honest.
Submit something you think you two would argue over.
Yeah.
I like that.
All right.
Next contestant is Tessa P.
That's a fun name, a Tessa.
You could be driving a Tessa.
Sleeping in, drinking coffee together, go day drink with friends and watch football,
sometimes go to the bars and have fun, sometimes stay in for a good movie night.
She didn't answer that question at all.
That was a...
10pm on weeknights, yes, account manager at a brokerage, Vyce's men that constantly stick
their tongue out in pictures.
I think she got V confused with ick.
Yeah.
Doesn't know what vice means or ideal.
Or unless she's fallen for a lot of men
that stick their tongue out in the air.
Maybe she does.
You stick your tongue out, I have to fuck you.
Ah!
Titus, are you on any?
Titus off the Henny.
Stick your tongue out.
Yeah, I can see.
I mean that one was. You didn't like that one. What didn't you like?
I love that.
Is that a strike?
No.
Am I striking at the end?
Yeah, you can strike at the end.
Yeah, I mean, so far the strike...
Well, no, the strike is gone because you're picking the ten.
Oh, true.
The nine.
Kate's picking one.
All right, so number strike.
This one, probably not going to make it.
Well, you haven't been taking any notes at all.
No, but I'll go through it and look.
Are we doing, are we selecting the 9?
That's what we're doing now.
Actually, yeah, let's have you pick 8, Kate pick 2.
Are we selecting the 9 today?
Okay.
Let's have you pick 8, Kate pick 2.
I like that.
Are we selecting that at the end of all this?
Yes.
Oh shit, then I should have been taking notes.
No, it's fine, it's fine.
Fuck.
We'll just probably do the whole thing.
You'll remember.
We'll just burn through all of them real quick.
Remember the one, give me the nod, whenever you, the name.
No, no, no, no, no.
He's giving you too much already. give me the nod whenever you the name
But there were there all the ones when yeah, all right make sure you keep those in the back here
Or give it the nod Jake
Next contestant is Mackenzie M. Great name
Great great name. Why do you say that? I love aenzie. One of my favorite names. I don't know what it is.
Alright.
Do you like the alliteration as well, Mackenzie M?
Playing pickleball.
That's some Marvel ass shit.
Binging Netflix and or watching college football. Midnight, yes.
Creative lead.
Social media, I'm chronically online.
That could be lead.
Creative lead.
Colored pencil.'s a creative lead
that's pick a real vice yeah but it's also similar to me I think people are
afraid to be to themselves I feel likeake's done that to himself yes
Yeah, i mean do you have all jake what do you think not a ton here what do you like you what do you think About pickleball it's fine okay?
What do you think about binging netflix all this is very what do you think about watching interest i don't know this is fine
Creative lead gives me nothing social media say how does creative lead give you nothing? She's in a creative job, but she's at the top of her her people and what it like
Sounds it could be something similar to you. Yeah, I mean this is again fine. I like the name big McKenzie fan
I think they're all forcing college football into
The shoehorn in college football and is that good or bad for you? The watch the streams one was fucking crazy. I can't believe they said that.
Whoever fucking said that is crazy.
I respect it, but that's insane.
Is it the stream specifically or Barstool content in general?
No, the stream specifically.
Watching that, if you're pulling that up on a Saturday as a woman, I'm shocked.
Shocking.
I think that's fair.
Right? On a Saturday. Sorry.
It wasn't necessary to touch me.
Watching a Saturday college football stream as a girl is one of the most insane things I've ever heard.
Maybe she's a transplant. Maybe she lives in a new city.
Maybe it's Chicago. maybe she's looking for
some pals and so she watches the stream maybe you're a bad guy maybe problem
Brandon are you giving up college football for the rest of the year no
it's whatever oh my god is there any chance a Mississippi State is there any
chance where the world you are in that top 25 ever? Or are you outside of that 25?
I don't see any world that we're gonna be in top 25.
Is that disrespectful?
I think it's disrespectful because I don't think we're really giving the same chance as everybody else.
And the ones in the top 25 ain't worth a shit either.
Damn.
So, whatever.
So we got-
That's our football talk a VB I want
this profile yes these are just initials a VB
good respect Abigail Van Buren at now be sick atmospheric vacuum breaker could be
that walking my dog girl named brew grabbing some brews with Brew on a patio to watch football
930 to 1030. Yes, lead generation manager and maybe drinking too much milk as an adult.
That's an interesting advice.
Yeah, that's fun.
That's a little clever here.
Yeah, I think she was trying to have fun.
Dog's name is Brew.
Which is a point in this.
Yeah. Cool.
Oh, he hates her.
Thoughts on, you don't like that. She didn't use her name
That's fine. I don't really
There's a dog
Good dog. That's a good dog. It's a better dog. The other dog. I disagree. I like the other dog more
Do you like the name of the dog? That's fine. Yeah
Do you like the profession? What is the profession? I don't know what that means a lead generation
Manager Do you like the profession? What is the profession? I don't know what that means. A lead generation manager? Manager.
Couldn't tell you.
Kate, she's just cute as a button.
I wanted to say she's cute as two buttons, not just one.
This...
Jake.
You heard the man.
I sure did.
There's a classiness.
We should do this like Queer Eye. I've never never seen the show but I think there's never mind
all right a bb generation manager how many we got left Jay it's the last one I
think how do you know we got like not it's a 24 almost you know we've been
going out of order oh gotcha okay, so she generates leads. Yeah, okay, okay?
Okay, you've been doing very good at this
I don't know. I still don't know what a rage
creating plans to generate leads
Leads or generation clues so like I think we could sell to these people over here. I got a bite yeah
So you think she's mingling networking yeah, just highlight $92,000
Her job doesn't matter if Malice is gonna make them quit
I'm not gonna make them quit, but it's preferred
No, that was not my point with the financial analyst when you get married no no have it
Yeah, but then the world girl that was a nanny and a chef you didn't like her either not because of that reason though
I forget what you want like a cold corporate bitch, but who's not doing that well
No, he doesn't want any sort of boss like he doesn't want a girl to have no
I would like them to be very successful my point is is
The being a financial analyst and wanting to be successful and one needs not have kids was like
You're right that's scary. You're actually a Goldilocks Goldilocks like yes. Yeah point of why we're doing this yeah
He's the exact that's the only reason I'm here is because everybody thinks that my standards are unrealistically high
They might be right yeah, I mean I don't like it either who do we have next
Next one is Claire C.
Thoughts on the name Claire.
Ideal Saturday. A nice fall day. Wake up and get coffee. Go for a walk. Get home. Have TV on while doing other productive things.
Then mid afternoon. Go and play pickleball with friends. Come home. Get ready. Go to a cute restaurant for dinner and drinks then go out 930 bedtime
She wants kids a second grade teacher
Do you have any vices drinking but only on weekends?
solid
Not much to say early bedtime a little early, but so you didn't like each other
That's a middle of the week a weekday bedtime. So what about second grade teacher?
Teacher does not the grade. Yeah, but what's better preschool or second grade second grade. I do think that your brain
Your when you deal with preschoolers
Your brain does get a little realize they're not in school. I know but I'm saying when you interact with
Avert I thought revert but I think you do I just I think there's like dealing with second graders who are like using like tick-tock phrases
but those are at least like
Cognizant people second graders are also
Programmed already whereas preschool you have to kind of molding right more responsibility now. What do you think about dating a teacher?
She has her summers off so you come home from a long day of work
She has all kinds of energy wants to go do something over the summer
Mm-hmm, that's how it is. I'm tired, babe
But babe, I was sitting at home all day waiting for you
Why is that my problem and you won't let her get a second job because that's disgusting
Speaking of babe
Whatever that means there she's very cute.
They all are.
Our next contestant is Page E.
Page E. Page E.
Nice.
Ideal Saturday, drinking, hanging out with friends,
and having no one approach me at a bar.
1 a.m. bedtime, no kids, she's in logistical sales her advice is our sleep and alcohol well let's
talk about that first sentence having no one approach me at the bar just like you I mean
no she's not you don't like this well no kid I know kids probably put you in the out out
because that's a that is I guess if I was to
have any boxes that would be a box would be kids that's a deal but that's a big
if if you had any boxes right like I'm full so it sounds like that's a box yeah
yeah that is a what let's go ahead and get up on that that's a box do you
realize these things we asked boxes for Jake you might want to uncheck that box. Fuck them. Woo hoo hoo! Yeah.
Woo hoo!
Woo!
You might want to.
Fuck them kids.
You might want to walk all that back.
I'm not, I don't want to answer but.
It sounds like I can't lose with the nine or eight
that I picked because all of these girls.
That's not.
How many times have I actually given you the nod?
Some of these reactions could be fake 100%
You have to decide that all right Titus doesn't lie. I would like I don't have it in me. I wouldn't know how
Prime wait who's like an ugly woman Eleanor Roosevelt try to call her hot
Shut the fuck up Kate. No she is she's crime low hand my ass. Oh
She's giving that vibe
Low hand and me can like mean girls low hand, but not in high schooler
Where is she?
Looks like Croatian no parents her dad her dad her dad's rich. Yeah, okay, I think I think you could I tell her honest to God I agree
All right, well next up next candidate is Kristen B
Yeah, he's right
Sleeping in going to Pilates getting coffee and a pastry riding on the couch the rest of the day 9 p.m.
Yes, lawyer just
graduated in May took the bar in July do you have any vices DK bonus bets and
nerds gummy clusters yeah elite candy DK bonus oh she's talking about booths like
that come on do you want to sucks she's pandering yeah that's a that's a brown
do you want to see her pussy well do you like you like DK bets? Oh? She's a cat out
Can't so allergic I can't do it a little hat can't do it though. I'm sorry. I'm sure she's a lovely girl He did to back
I wish I could I can't I can't I can't be gone. It's wearing a tiny
Doorable to cats wearing a graduation cap that I can't do cats. I'm sorry. It's wearing a graduation cap. I can't.
I would die.
I can't do cats.
Are you striking?
Oh, it doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
I can't.
Sorry.
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All right.
Next candidate is Helen R.
Oh, I love a Helen.
Yeah, Helen, she's a hoot.
Okay.
During the fall, coffee and bed around 10 a.am, set up a blanket bed in the living room to
watch college football, probably nap to wake up in time for the end of any chaotic 330
games, having friends over for dinner, drinks for the evening games, 11pm, yes, PhD candidate,
I'm working on my PhD at Duke, okay she's ready.
And a third glass of red wine, reading too much news, doom scrolling.
Good vices. Alright. You shook your head no while squinting. He's a Virginia guy, he doesn't like Duke. And a third glass of red wine reading too much news doom-scrolling
You shook your head no while squint he's a virginia. I don't like to don't like Duke
Not a fan. She's getting her PhD at Duke dude opposite the track
And picture at the wedding reception and her breeder and who would have thought that our Duke girl would
Virginia Tech
Which school are you from we should take a really random house divided flag like Clemson and breaking bad
I love breaking bad on Saturday watches Clemson
Great eyebrows yeah, she's well put together. Yep
All right, how many more we got Steven a handful. We got speed up here a little bit This one's gonna be Cory be
From Florida Cory Brewer?
Could be.
Spelled differently.
Oh.
You put your check.
Oh, I like that spelling.
What's your ideal Saturday?
Being somewhere outside with a nice view early in the day,
usually a light hike, possibly read at the park,
and get good food and watch a show and be in bed by 11.
Ideal end of the night is a threesome
with Matt Lisek and his dog
Him watching in the corner is an option. That's funny yak fan bedtime. Do they?
dumb fuck
How do you think they found out about this oh yak fan? What do you think of a yeah a female yak super fan I?
Work nights at the lab you're out right wait. Let's see bedtime. I'm saying my sleep so everyone's gained no kids
Over four for me of knowing what that is tech grossing trainee tissue debt the department
Histatech grossing trainee tissue debt? Department.
Department.
Tissue debt.
Dude, she's in his heavy tissue debt.
So much snot on her face.
She just needs Melasek for his body.
She needs the tissue.
Sweet, sweet, and being remarkably good looking,
charmingly funny.
Cory B.
All right.
I don't know.
Sense of humor.
She was sassy.
Little edgy.
I'll say it pulls off a Baywatch cut swimsuit pretty well.
I hate you guys
You're lying
She is the opposite of his pubes she what
She has no cubes on the other side of the room
Brandon were to wear this swimsuit Okay, all right bring up Natalie D I don't know what I'm saying. Okay. I'm sorry Cory. Okay.
Alright. Bring up Natalie D. Natalie D.
Natalie D. Brunch, beer, sports. Midnight. Yes. We like that.
Data analyst, alcohol, nicotine. Nice. Love that. She is through. That girl is through.
Is that your number one?
Number one To the fucking point. We love that
Also the same but three words because all of this applies to a dude. This is like this is
She had me at D
Welcome to the final ten.
Any woman that is displaying dude qualities?
That was succinct and to the point.
And if I can't have any other information, that's fine.
I like beer, sports, nicotine.
The next one's going to be Austin B.
He's going to say he's in.
My vice is jerking my dick.
Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My vice is jerking my dick. Oh yeah, yeah, through.
We got, I think two left.
Next is Katie P.
Katie P.
Oh, she'd have you howling.
Yep.
That is a lot of leather.
That is a lot of leather.
Go to the farmer's market to get the next week's groceries,
go on a run to the lakefront grab lunch with
a friend at a local place read at my favorite coffee shop or park dinner
drinks concert with friends 11 p.m. yes account manager health care
communications I am a reformed people pleaser
apparels how you say that spritz spritz enthusiasts I'm an apparel. That was the word of the two words. That was the hard one. Yeah, I meant what's apparel
interesting to the point of gullible.
Nice. She's too good for you, Jake. She seems. Yeah, I don't
want her to I want her to remove I might have to put my
foot down. I'm stopping her. He was really sweet. Yeah.
Yeah, she can do better than you. A lot of leather. Gorgeous.
And it's not too much leather. It's the perfect amount for her. Yeah, this is a lady who has turned it around
Yeah, and she's on a glow up my big time
Yeah, I Don't say that Brandon what nothing
I'm just gonna say sure
She knows sex positions that would make you uncomfortable
Sure. She knows sex positions that would make you uncomfortable.
Yeah.
Okay.
You would not.
I'm out.
I'm totally out.
Yeah.
Then I'm out.
Thanks for playing.
No, she's better than you.
Yeah.
For real.
She's going to have you strung up in a freezer.
I think that's what he needs.
A dominatrix?
Yeah.
Little finger in the butt.
All right, what else?
Yeah, last one. the butt. Alright, what else?
So this is the final person.
Jenna B.
Jenna B?
Jenna.
Champagne brunch followed by football in the fall,
Pilates and park days the rest of the year, 11.
No, engineer, tequila, taco bell.
Engineer.
Why'd you do the double hand push away?
No kids. Tough. the Taco Bell engineer you why'd you do the double hand push away no kids so
everybody who's a no kids is out probably except for the hot one Mark
said yeah I'd keep her just just to see I want to can stay you can change your
mind the rest of them probably out see she looks super fun too yeah this might
be she's very pretty she didn't send a picture. I don't think these are yak listeners
I think they're she this one didn't have yeah
No way these girls dude it's gonna be John Anthony's other sister. We do not I think a lot of these are girlfriend
We don't have this many single beautiful with not a down
Every single one of these is dating a yak list, that's exactly what is it what is that?
All right, so that's it. That's it. So let's go through them all the speed speed
You say yes now, and I will write some stop you at eight
Kate if he says
No to one that you want to say yes to you have to
Kate mark let's talk real quick. Yeah, we're not naming names. I think there's a clear top three on the pictures.
Oh.
Pictures, pictures, pictures.
I have my one.
Yeah.
I think it's...
I have, yep, two.
Malice, how do you feel about all this confidence, too?
They're all very pretty.
They're all very pretty, but I think there's a strong
top three separated.
Is this, did this get off to a start that you?
I think this is going surprisingly. Well. Yeah, I would say I like I would agree with you
I have I think there's a top two I envision this being strictly men I
Did your two are I added you wish so there are a few people that were eliminated by Jake
I'll just say those right now so everyone hears them Tina R was a little on the list
Girl with a cat Tina R was everyone hears them Tina R was a little on the list cat girl with a cat
Tina R was a little no Tina R was you know our body boom Jake Jake Tina R was not a little
She was not eliminated
Talk about the girl with the cat is out. I can't do cat okay that girl Katie P was eliminated Helen R
The girl with the cat is out. I can't do a cat. Okay that girl's out. So Katie P was eliminated, Helen R, Kristen B, and that's it for eliminated.
Do you want to see the ones you eliminate the profiles? Yeah can I see again?
Yeah yeah let's just let's run through from the top to bottom I'll do the
quick speed round. Yep quick speed round yes no. Of the eight and then Kate gets two.
Okay. And you get to save so she's saving two? Yeah but I would like if it's a no
I would like you to just say one sentence why okay cool cool all right?
Well, we're going back through real quick back through. I'm gonna pick out the eight that I want okay, and then Kate gets the two Tina are
out HR
Tina are this is your name though. There's only one team that hit let I've tried to save him like a hundred times
Well, it fucking she's out
She was one watching the streams to know I can't I'm out. He's out
All right, I know you said you wanted me to guys tomorrow. I can't
You want to see you want to save her?
She's out. Okay, not saving her. I'll see you on Friday when I when I get the fumbles I
Can't I'm on the fence, but I'm gonna let you.
Okay.
I'm sorry, Tina R.
Reach out to Brandon.
Or anybody here.
Yeah, I know.
Or Emily, any...
Yeah, she's too good for you.
Stunning, I will say too good for her.
Most of these women are gonna be too good for me.
I don't know what they're doing here.
You can say all.
All right, so she's out.
Well, that's one down.
Bye, Tina. Hardly. Well. That's one down, but you know hardly new you Madeline F
Well this is the one in Rome girl, why didn't you make notes?
Well, I was I was told not to yeah this on the middle okay, all right all right so that I was whatever um
She smoked cigarettes international. This is the one in Rome girl. Yeah international smoker hmm
This is the one in Rome girl. Yeah international smoker hmm
Yeah, you're gay. Yeah, you just made that no. I just watched the one see losing the first
Show him yes, who wants you in LV 1990?
Tina was hot like that hot Tina was show him flash the phone one second. Are you ready? Yeah?
It's the it's the upper picture. Just click on her
Your first heartbreak Tina was hot
She's out though you was out see you See ya. DM me. Um, next was Madeline. That was the went-and-roamed cigarettes girl. Yeah.
I will also say pass on Madeline. Is anybody gonna make that? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't see her in. The next one, Emily W. was Malasek approved in real time.
Okay. Yeah, in. Nice.
I think Madeline was down the list a little bit
Bruxy is the one that loves her job out she knows why financial analyst and no
kids okay all right fair enough this concern was fake vice no she's out okay
barbying with the family I don't love so
out of four like that I love that okay
like out of four you've seen you've
already not three of them out yeah but
I it's a yes to get more than how I
can't bring Tina back not allowed there next is Rachel B. Who has two jobs
Next up on the main stage Rachel B
To show me Rachel B's you may know her from one of her jobs or her other first dog pass
Pass as in you're not deciding yet. No like out. Okay, because you didn't like the dog
What to to furry to furry? I got a thing with dog here. I can't oh you have a high bar. Okay, I get it
Next is now. Uh, you're my son Abby J. Mousic gave a strike to her
No, no, we're back in why I why back in okay after hearing all of your
reasoning I will be back in on Abby J she but wait a minute look at dilly
dally on screen again I know I don't like I don't love it but Abby J is
through Abby J is my second in so that was maybe one of my saves so now I have an extra save
so we have Abby J who was the first one Matt no Emily W Emily W. Emily W. All right. And Tina. Okay. Tina is in.
Mary M. is next.
She was the first one.
You just said fine.
Uh-oh.
Uh-oh. Smoker.
Oh, designer.
Oh, yeah.
This is our first one.
Yeah. Yeah.
F1.
That's right.
Uh. Did you just black out there for a second. Yeah, I did
It's smoking as big of a no as no kids
No, no kids is definitely the number one bad
Mary can go through Mary's in all right then
Mary isabel c is next sorry your comment was eh
Mary and Isabelle C is next sorry your comment was eh
This is the Google oh
mmm Yeah, I mean I'm out on yeah, all right. She's working that search bar all day
It's so small
Erica Kay is next you said fine
You're gonna be in the country club? No thank you.
Erica Kaye, sorry.
Wait, Erica Kaye's out?
Yeah, do you want to save her?
I need to see where...
Why is she out?
A lot of writing.
Okay yeah.
What?
Too in-depth.
It is a lot of writing.
She talks too much.
Too in-depth.
She never shuts up.
Oh you fool.
You want to save her?
You get two. You want to save her?
You get two.
You got two saves, Kate.
She's looking.
I'm like.
You can also retroactively save Tia.
What's going through your head, Kate?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I'm just saying.
This looks like somebody I could see you on a boat.
Out at.
I'm going to save her.
Who'd you just save?
Erica Kay.
Erica Kay. Wait, can I wait till the end'd you just save Erica Kay, Erica Kay?
Wait can I wait till the end to give my say sure yeah?
We're also welcome to save Tina if you would like she's one of the first now you saw Tina it's over
Next is Taylor H in real time you said good bro fumble Tina are
Taylor H in we like Taylor Taylor H is in we like Taylor wait interior designer she's telling you I know but then the
Red Wings thing saved her I like that okay hey Jake hmm next to Sarah P who
you said pretty good Taylor H at the moment is the front runner to win this
thing Wow I want that on the record Sarah P patent attorney in okay Sarah P patent attorney in okay, Sarah P. This is the dog you liked mm-hmm okay
Is that why in also I like the patent attorney and that she likes shitty TV
Next is Miranda M. You had nothing to say I don't like her out why
Smoking weed and being a preschool teacher not my favorite combination all right
That's actually fair. No that is true. I hate that man. That's oil and water man. So currently we're at five
I'm a mom and I'm okay with that
Sorry, we're five right now you have one save so we I have four left you have one left
That's more than
No, that's that's five plus
He already has one on the board is one save already
used okay I have picked four other girls so that's five and then so we're you
have the same combination double this up yeah yeah we only need more girls that
have not been eliminated all right oh shit next is tessa P didn't understand
vices I'm out.
Yeah, does that mean she just Googles pictures of men
with their tongues out?
I don't know.
She can't stop looking.
Yeah.
All right.
She's out.
Next is Jenna B, who was the last one we did.
How many we got left?
Four left.
I think seven.
Six left.
Seven left.
Oh, shit.
So like all the last four are going to be in, essentially. She doesn't want kids. Yeah, no kids are out. Six left. No kids out last four are gonna be in essentially she doesn't want kids yeah
No kids are six left. No kids out which is gonna basically put everybody else in
essentially
KDP
Yeah, we like KDP. She was too good for me. Yeah, she is nice KDP is in okay
Oh, KDP is in now. She was previously ruled out well. She's now back in
Sorry, sorry KDP
Sorry KDP you are in now next is Natalie D. I
We like Natalie oh yeah short and sweet yeah the point leader in the clubhouse. I'd say next we got Cory B
No
No kids too confusing of a job yeah and too confusing of a job
We had previously eliminated Helen are yeah do be who are next out
For more we're going with page e go back to the other one though, but the one that we just had Kristen
mmm
This is the cat
Helen are the only reason was Duke.
Yeah, I know.
Yeah.
Hey, G.
That's a pretty good reason, actually.
Yeah.
I don't like Duke either, to be honest with you.
No kids.
See you.
All right.
Claire C.
The final three all are yes for kids.
Claire C.
OK.
You said solid, but early bedtime.
Yeah, sure babe, it's not gonna work out you go to bed too early players in players in
Next is a VB. I would like to learn more about a VB. Yeah, I feel like that is her doing a short
Yeah
That was the good dog. We like that. Yeah
Which that was the good dog we like that dog. She's interesting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Good candidate.
Finally we have Mackenzie M and that's the last one.
You like the name Mackenzie? I do like the name Mackenzie.
Mackenzie M. Do you like Chronically Online?
Yeah, yeah I guess so.
So that puts us at what? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, that's 10.
Kate, and do you want to step in?
You want to switch somewhere? How many do I have left to save?
You have one save left but I have 10 people you can, you can move whoever you want to step in you want to switch somebody how many do I have left to save one save left but I
Have ten people you can you get move this one you want around
Throwing a curveball do it. I know it's not fair. I know it's slanting things
Tina you're back
Let's go
Eleven fuck yeah, Tina welcome back to the show, but I don't
Know no, sorry
Okay, okay, I think Jake has to go home tonight and think about fumbling to yeah
What I won't lose a wink asleep
Okay out cuz I'm gonna bring her back in a fair she is out? Because I'm going to bring her back in if Erica Kaye is out.
She is out as well.
I'm bringing Erica Kaye back in.
Oh, the talker.
Erica Kaye, welcome back.
So tomorrow, no names attached to room and voice.
Right.
So you will eliminate?
Oh, by name and voice.
Yeah.
OK, got you.
Hold on.
We have 11 right now.
Is that cool?
Yeah. Yeah. Because somebody probably won't get us get back to us tomorrow for tomorrow
Tina is the one that got away forever for Jake now yep
She's with white boy Rick now
Did Emily W get voted off to no she's in okay?
All right mouse like thoughts that. Okay. I like her.
Alright, Malasek, thoughts?
That was fun.
I enjoyed that.
It went better than I thought.
I'm excited to see what happens.
And you can tell you're excited.
Here, just hold Tina for a sec.
I'm excited to see what happens.
This feels like a photo from like 2014.
I'm fascinated by this picture.
Why? it's just
a picture giant this is like a legit 2014 Facebook profile picture that you
described the thing what fascinating are hanging hanging giant American flag on
the wall not in a frame like nailed to the wall underneath it is a she could be
at a bar what looks like Polaroid photos which are in right now are you talking
about you don't get the background like that no
It's a her face takes up 99% of the picture. That's why she's not looking at her face. Yeah, what do you?
He's not looking at her face. It's a selfie
You look at the background of a selfie. How'd you even see that yeah, okay?
All right, well
We gotta do the high noon ad read. Oh read oh, what do you mean by we brother?
You can't me that sheet
Yeah, cuz I I don't
Memorize anything hey Nick you know where Jake's going where's Jake on set up quick picks
Now I know you're fucking around
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You got three shows though when the office is supposed to be closed?
Yeah, well. Ah, that's good. sorry sorry what do we want the voice recording of the line
from their favorite movie or song if it's a song speaking it or singing
something speaking it I don't remember him speak you remember what American
flags were in in 2014 yeah that's bad people were like, he is he's averse to all qualities. Yeah. He hates qualities. Yeah. I
just want to say too, thank you to every lady that submitted.
You're all beautiful and they were and you're all too good
for him. No, it is. They win by getting eliminated. Yeah. Oh
yeah. Oh yeah. Yeah. It is literally inequality. His
number one candidate was the person that put three words.
Yeah. Yeah. He just doesn't want to know. What's what it
described himself? Yeah.
Beers, brunch, and whatever, football.
Interest, stuff.
What a fascinating man.
That's the best way to get put through is just like my number one interest is stuff.
He's being so genuine too.
You could tell that was real from him.
Yeah.
I'm excited for tomorrow.
What a cat.
TJ, get the wheel ready.
Or spin the wheel if you can.
Would we even be allowed to do wet right now if it comes up wet
We're gonna just have to delay it until Monday because we're not allowed to go where the shower is
I was afraid to even come they wouldn't let me go to the bathroom earlier
I went to the wrong bathroom and they stopped me
You in the woman's yeah, so I did I have assaulted the second place
Alright dry so we got got more of this tomorrow.
Okay, I want them to also maybe something about what they think of Jake.
Yeah, yeah.
It was a line from a movie or song, picture of a room, something you don't like about Jake.
How about a concern about Jake?
A concern, yes.
A concern about Jake? Yeah. A concern about Jake.
Alright, so if you made the finals, I will be DMing you on Instagram.
Please accept that and we'll need...
There's a chance that we don't get everyone by tomorrow.
And the concern could be physical or mental.
Well, I mean, this is a test to see how bad they want it.
Some of them might drop out.
Yeah.
Alright, we'll be back tomorrow.
Thanks. We have no one tomorrow.
Nobody.
Hey chat, hopefully everybody had a good weekend. Thanks Lucas.
Ummm, see you tomorrow.
Bye.