The Yak - The Secret To Getting Top Tier P*ssy | The Yak 1-7-21

Episode Date: January 8, 2022

DaléYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. What up, what up? It's the Yak. Sass is out. Brandon's out. You may have saw Brandon 35 seconds ago on the previous show, but now he's out. So it's me.
Starting point is 00:00:35 It's KB. It's Rudy. We have Jordan back. New face. We have a new fucking face. Slowly. KB, mean ass fit. For real?
Starting point is 00:00:46 For real, for real. We got GOM in the building. Oh, goddamn. O'Malley, what's going on? Introduce yourself. Name's O'Malley. What's up? You created Chicken Fry.
Starting point is 00:00:59 Yeah, I know. I gave birth to her. Yeah. That's my little side project, though. What's the least favorite thing About your mom? What? What do you hate the most
Starting point is 00:01:09 About your mom? What the hell? I was giving you an alley-oop Oh dude I'm not This is like a set up Kind of thing You've done this before
Starting point is 00:01:19 What's that? You were asked this before And you said something about Like being breastfed Until I was like Nine or something. Oh, yes, yes, yes. Is that true?
Starting point is 00:01:29 Were you? Yeah. I couldn't stop. Was it your choice or hers? We're here with Rudy as well. What up? No, that was all me. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:39 And then she tried to pack it up for lunch, and it was kind of weird. Yeah, I get it. Yeah, I know. The screening's tight, though. KB, you invited some two youngsters on the show, too. Mad Dog and Fran's sister, Gia. And guess what? Tardy.
Starting point is 00:01:54 It's a bad sign. Yeah, you would think they would maybe care. You think they'd pounce on the opportunity. I sure did. Yeah, you sprinted in here. This is the modern day. Yep, look at that. That's where they should be.
Starting point is 00:02:05 Look at that. We give you a platform. Big cat on. Nah, I guess we won't make it. Pass. Go down the sass route. No one even cares anymore. Nobody gives a fuck.
Starting point is 00:02:15 Look how disgusting this studio is. That's it. It's funny how like Barstool Sports, like I always tell people when I meet them, I'm like, dude, you don't get it. Like everyone there is really cool. They're kind of nerdy. Like it's much less than you'd think. And then I people When I meet them I'm like dude you don't get it Like everyone there is really cool Or kind of nerdy Like it's much less than you'd think And then I walk into the office
Starting point is 00:02:28 And I'm like fuck man It just looks like How everyone thinks it does Yeah It looks exactly how Like someone who doesn't know Barstool Sports Would imagine it looks
Starting point is 00:02:37 We just got a random Skate deck on the ground Yeah That's fly There's Pat Oh here they are. Uh-huh. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:47 Your emotions are valid is what Mad Dog's hoodie says. Well, guess what? Our time is invaluable, I guess. Is our time not valuable? Okay, just get on. Well, let's talk into the mic. I know you've never done this before. Well, now I'm fucking nervous because there's four girls and me.
Starting point is 00:03:04 I wanted to come in at 12.58 and Gia was like, they don't want us on there. I thought that Nick would come up and be like, hey, we're going. Come on. No, they don't do that. No, yeah. Just show up. And I was like, let's go. I was beeping and bopping ready to go.
Starting point is 00:03:18 So KB invited all you ladies. Beeping and bopping. No, it wasn't like that. KB. And then you put on your fly a shirt That the world has never seen And you showed it to me when you bought it Months ago and I was like dude you gotta wear that Tonight and he's like nah I gotta wait
Starting point is 00:03:31 I was like for what And then now you're wearing it You fucking weirdo I wasn't saving this I acquired it You got that for buying the most bras You're fucking the raw girl. Raw.
Starting point is 00:03:46 Oh, dang. You dirty doll. Raw chick is hot. Raw chick is hot. Yeah, she's super hot. It's a raw chick? Yeah, it's like a chick in a bikini. She's like the face of raw?
Starting point is 00:03:54 KB's fucking the face of raw. It's a cartoon. It's a cartoon blonde. He's face fucking her. Yeah, it's a cartoon blonde girl. That rolls papers. Is it like the raw Betty Boop? Huh?
Starting point is 00:04:04 I don't know. Yeah, kind of. Betty Boop is curvaceous as hell. Betty Boop? Huh? I don't know. Yeah, kind of. Betty Boop is curvaceous as hell. Betty Boop was the original BBL. Yeah, I guess you're right. Oh, dang. That was Zaz's sexual awakening,
Starting point is 00:04:12 Betty Boop. Really? Yeah, very true. You got my attention. Run that, oh, shit. She was not about, wasn't Betty Boop like racist?
Starting point is 00:04:19 Yes, she was. Her acts were just very racist. They all were back then. Yeah. So it's cool. It's all Gucci. You don't care about that, Zaha. There you go. Mine was Lola Bunny for sure.
Starting point is 00:04:31 Why were they all cartoons? Because that's the first thing you see. Why were all what cartoons? Like all your sexual awakenings. Yeah. Not me. What was yours? Ren from Even Stevens.
Starting point is 00:04:41 Yeah, but you just liked that she had a silent W in her name. That's what turned you on. I did. Mine was a cartoon as well. Mine was Debbie Thornberry. Oh, what? Yeah, she was like a... Was that the blonde?
Starting point is 00:04:52 No, that's the blonde sister. The blonde sister. Sexy cartoons. Incredibles, Evil Woman. Oh, yeah. The white hair. Fool her up. Safe search off, fool her up.
Starting point is 00:05:04 She sure is smoking. She's curvaceous. She is disgusting. Safe search off. Pull her up. DJ. She sure is smoking. She's curvaceous. DJ is disgusting. I thought you meant Edna. DJ. Edna. Do you know Jake Malasek?
Starting point is 00:05:13 No capes. He has your dad blocked on Twitter. What the fuck? I'm going to beat that kid up. He doesn't like your mom's brownies. And he has... Why does Brandon look like such a young boy? Pen up.
Starting point is 00:05:23 Pen up. He looks like he's on a field trip. Get his fit. He looks so young. He's trying to brag about his fit today, too. He's wearing a Nike hoodie and Adidas pants. And his jacket is Sean John. What?
Starting point is 00:05:34 Because it's two white names. I had to break it to him. He was livid. He was so pissed off. That's funny. KB, where did you get that shirt? Thrift shop. Liar.
Starting point is 00:05:48 You're lying to us. There's no way. There's no way. That's not what you told us 10 minutes ago. Where'd you guys get your blouses? Especially you two. This was Alex Bennett's Christmas present to me. She made it herself?
Starting point is 00:05:59 No, she bought it. Her? Her? She is hot. That's not who I was thinking of. She is sexy. The icy blonde. Icy blondes are fire.
Starting point is 00:06:11 When she walks, her body... She's shaking those little hands. She's Mariah Carey. Search Mirage Inevitables GIF. That's thin spoke. Let's get her in motion. Have you guys ever seen Lion King 2? No. Oh, yeah. Look up. Yeah, let's get this thing. Let's get her in motion. Have you guys ever seen Lion King 2?
Starting point is 00:06:27 No. Oh, the girl lion? The girl lion's love interest. Like the boy lion? Yeah. I was asking. Yeah, are there any guy cartoons at White Sox Dave's territory? White Sox Dave was attracted to Nala. Nala.
Starting point is 00:06:40 Still is. Simba. Is that an underage issue? Nala? Adult Nala. Adult Nala adult world yeah half the movie she's a baby yeah she's like a cub oh my god oh is she like uh she's like mysterious sexy she is she's the is she a whore nice save oh yeah no she she was a fucking slut she was trying to like mack on Mr. Incredible Yeah
Starting point is 00:07:05 Fucking Homer Remember Yeah Yeah look at him Yeah She's like I know her Big strong arms
Starting point is 00:07:11 I know one of those Really You know Mirage There's a couple of those In New York Yeah Where Yeah
Starting point is 00:07:17 Soho I'll take you up Rudy you know I don't I want to find my Mirage That'd be cool Rudy dresses like a bum And just because your face is perfectly symmetrical, everybody's like, Rudy's fit is incredible.
Starting point is 00:07:30 You wear chains, though, too. It's all it takes. It's all it takes. Chains help. You guys need to get some chains in your game. No, it doesn't fucking help, Rudy. It does. No.
Starting point is 00:07:38 I think Gia's got the hardest fit. It's three centimeters of bone that you have in your jaw that I don't. No, you're being... No, it's confidence. You're sneaky hot. That's fucked up. You're hot. I told Gia that the other day. I go, Nick
Starting point is 00:07:51 doesn't get enough credit. No, but he... This is so fucked up. I should get immediate credit. What do you mean credit? What do you want? Nothing. I don't want anything. Nick could be posted on Barstool Boners.
Starting point is 00:08:07 TJ, put on Cute Cam. That's my dream. Put on Barstool Boners. Oh, Maddie. Very well will be one day. Maddie, do you have a dad? He wishes no. Wait, Barstool Boners is an account?
Starting point is 00:08:21 It's a Reddit thread. Thank you, TJ. I was told about it my first week here. Don't pull it up. It's a Reddit thread. Thank you, TJ. It's action, it's action. I was told about it like my first week here. Don't pull it up, but it's funny. Don't pull it up. It's depraved. Cute cam.
Starting point is 00:08:30 That's cool. Aww. I think Gia's got the hardest fit. Gia does have really hard fits. Always, every day. Thank you. Go hard in the pain, my man. And the jewelry.
Starting point is 00:08:38 Your jewelry's fire. Thank you. So Gia is Fran's sister. You guys are exact opposites. But we don't want your Gia. Thank you. Your Gia. Your Barstool Gia. That's sister. You guys are exact opposites. But we don't want your Gia. Your Barstool Gia. That's her tag. Follow her.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Barstool Gia. Breaking news. Barstool launched a men's grooming line today called Wood, capital W. And we're lucky enough to be with the face of it right now, KB. Yeah. You smell like your favorite bloggers. The sense or money. KB. Yeah. Smell like your favorite bloggers. Censor money. I smelled them yesterday.
Starting point is 00:09:09 KB and I, I can't wait to go out this weekend. We had to do the commercial with the hottest guy in the city. I was making him crack up. You were making him
Starting point is 00:09:16 genuinely laugh. We had to do like 50 takes. He kept giggling. But I didn't know he was... Jeremy from Love Island. I didn't know he was... So funny.
Starting point is 00:09:23 Oh, wait. Really? Yeah. My question is, was he actually naked? Shampoo. There's KP's voice. Body wash. Wood.
Starting point is 00:09:30 Sexy voiceover. This guy must work out. I bet this guy's name is Kent. Was he actually naked? No. Yeah, that's a big question. I think we got the point across. I definitely would use wood, but now I would rather not keep staring at a naked man.
Starting point is 00:09:47 I'm good either way. Let's just keep staring. Okay. That's not what I said. Baby, great delivery. That was like, let's just keep staring. That's not what I fucking said. I had a full line that came after that.
Starting point is 00:10:02 What was it? This is something cute. I can't wait to go out to the sports bar this weekend with you. And they're going to be like, yo, Nick from Rediscovering America and KB from the Barstool Soap. Great to meet you, man. Yeah, cool shirt. I had a script. They gave me a script and it was like lines and it was like I had to say like
Starting point is 00:10:25 this guy looks like his name is Kent. We saw that. Yeah. But what was that last line? Can we go to the last line of that commercial? Because it sounded like
Starting point is 00:10:36 you were going to did you forget a part of it? Listen, just keep staring. During that take, I forgot the rest of the line. And they just used that one. Oh, they went with that one.
Starting point is 00:10:53 It didn't make sense. What was the rest of the line? I forget. I'm sure it was great. Thank you. Can we clip that for Yak Twitter? No. How awkward would it be if he got wood while promoting wood oh yeah with all
Starting point is 00:11:06 those so i was in a figure drawing class uh in college and the guy got a boner that we were drawing wait wait wait you were in a what figure drawing i was uh i have a bfa a bachelor of fine arts oh that's sick still what do you mean if they would come in and stand on like something like this and hold like a skull and just naked, men and women. You used pencils or? Charcoals, pastels, pencils. I was in a figure drawing class and the guy got a boner and we had to take a break. Oh, fuck. But then the guy would come around.
Starting point is 00:11:33 All right, break up. Everyone go home for a second. Are you drawing it? Well, they were students and they made $50 an hour and it was a three-hour class. Wow. $150 to just stand naked. $150 to get a boner. My friend did it.
Starting point is 00:11:44 Yeah. And it was a three-hour class. Wow. $150 to just stand naked. $150 to get a boner. My friend did it. My friend. But this guy would come around and look at the drawings of himself naked on break. That's fucked up. So I made his cock wide. I mean, you've got to be a narcissist to do that. I made it really wide. So you could be a student at a college and just pose naked in a classroom. Of your penis.
Starting point is 00:12:01 I don't think that was a thing at my school. If you call it art. Not North Dakota. North Dakota didn't have that. I don't think that was a thing at my school if you call it all right not north dakota north dakota didn't have that i don't think miami ohio did either miami ohio you're just gonna keep i know you love we've been in that conversation yeah i know favorite place you say it every time i say it every time i'm on this oh that place is amazing and every time i tell good school he loves it you love miami ohio hockey there the most underrated school in america is miami ohio well Ohio. You're like a douche bag. It's a big hockey school.
Starting point is 00:12:30 Miami, Ohio is a good school. It's a great place. I was going to say something. It's just all the same people. Cissette White. All privileged people. Wait. You want to fall back real quick?
Starting point is 00:12:45 Yeah, fall back. Where'd you go? Michigan State. That's a very diverse, different. It's a lot of people. 50,000 kids. You don't know where you're going to get them. Where are you from?
Starting point is 00:12:53 New Jersey. Okay. Listen, you're talking about things. How many times have you been to Europe for vacation? Actually, that's a good question. Let's just go around the room. I wasn't saying myself. I wasn't saying myself.
Starting point is 00:13:05 I was just saying Miami, Ohio. Miami, Ohio is cool. We'll just cut right to the chase. It has the most hot girls of any school in America. Really? Is that true? Yeah, I love one. We're ranked number one for most attractive women
Starting point is 00:13:18 and number two for most attractive men. Who's making that poll? Not me. There's no metrics to measure that. My friends are hot. I love when you're talking to a guy and he's like, dude, Calgary has the best pussy. The fucking talent in Calgary. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:13:31 How do you know? The whole time. The talent in Calgary is unreal. Dude, Santa Fe has underrated pussy. I love it when dudes. It's girls at every, like, what are you talking about? I love it when dudes bring up that there's More women than men In New York
Starting point is 00:13:46 It's like yeah You just It falls into your Fucking lap What are you talking about You just overrun Trip and fall Into some pussy
Starting point is 00:13:54 Yeah it's just like They're starving for it That's like No That's Dan Bilzerian Could possibly be The complete opposite Yeah
Starting point is 00:14:00 If you've seen that Dan Bilzerian TikTok It's I can't stop laughing Yeah The reason I get The reason girls Oh my god That one's so Wait can we pull that up opposite yeah if you've seen that dan blaserian tiktok it's i can't stop laughing yeah the reason i get the reason oh my god that one's so quick we'll pull that up the music up to your pussy is because of how i set my life up the music behind it and he's like i would never slide into a girl's dm yeah he's like and then it's reverse psychology because they want to fuck you wait did i won't slide in no he's never slid into DMs.
Starting point is 00:14:25 Dan Bilzerian? I thought I said somewhere that he stopped fucking, stopped partying. Are you listening to yourself right now? No, I know. You're talking about Dan Bilzerian? I thought I saw this somewhere.
Starting point is 00:14:36 Stop? Which one is it? I forgot I said it. I don't know. That would be a huge life change. It might be top left. There goes everything. That's it.
Starting point is 00:14:45 My whole thing is that the longer you wait to sleep with a girl, the more fucked up the relationship becomes. Well, I still want to hear this. Pretending to be who the girl or who he thinks the girl wants him to be so he can get the pussy, right? And the girl is trying to be the best version of herself. You know what I mean? So it's not like a real. It's like P.A.'s or something. It's bullshit, man.
Starting point is 00:15:06 It's like it's just acting, you know? And so the problem is the longer they act, then when they do finally fuck and when they do start actually hanging out, then it's like how long do they maintain this facade, right? Because the girl's like claimed like, oh, I've only hooked up with three guys and I'm not normally like this and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Starting point is 00:15:22 And then a year down the road, he finds out you know, out a bunch of shit about the girl or, you know, or she can't maintain her whatever. He's basically saying open communication is key. Exactly. Can you fuck a girl straight away? And especially when she has a boyfriend and there's just like nothing to lie about.
Starting point is 00:15:37 It's like a more pure relationship. Yeah, it's way more pure. No, yeah. Thank God he's finally saying that. Whenever you fuck a girl straight away. Straight away and she has a boyfriend. Those are two good things. Pure.
Starting point is 00:15:49 You know it's pure. KB, I met the best girl. Like, I didn't even get her name. Fucked her immediately. I think it's that one. Went home with her dude. I'm in love. Like, she's a good girl.
Starting point is 00:15:58 Yeah, I think it's the duet to that one. This is it. This is it. Yeah. Click on the, like, the at. I have done that. The reason I get so much so much like top to your pussy is because of the sad song you know and like the situation this is played the songs for like dogs that are on their last day when you're at a party when i was in a fraternity
Starting point is 00:16:17 if you're at a party and you've got you know whatever three four hundred girls and there's you know 40 guys like they got to compete for you. Nobody shows them attention. They almost got to fuck a guy to feel validated. It kind of flips the whole thing. The reason I get it. Dan, your life is so hard. That guy rocks, dude. He talks about it like it's a battle. It's like he's gearing up for a battle.
Starting point is 00:16:40 The music is what made it that much better. I do have to say something. Patrick just walked by. Patrick of the Tico variety. Does he have a key card? He just walked in with people. And then Tico gave a tour of the office to that guy she sat on a plane next to.
Starting point is 00:16:55 Did you see them introducing him to Tommy? No. Oh, it's a great video. Wait, what? Patrick Tico brought in who? Tico Texas. Patrick Texas. That's his last name. Tico brought in who? Tico, Texas. Patrick, Texas. That's his last name.
Starting point is 00:17:07 Tico's not his last name. Anything to say, Gia? Tico has a whole first name. That's not Tico. What is Tico's first name? Email her. It's her email name. She said it on the act the other day.
Starting point is 00:17:18 Yeah, it would make you laugh, not me, because it's gone in. I wasn't laughing because of that. I'm laughing because you don't even know it. Can we put Patrick Tico's Twitter? They met a stoolie on a plane and brought him into the office to meet Tommy Smokes. Wait, wait. That's incredible. Yeah, it's incredible.
Starting point is 00:17:38 What? Wait, what happened? What? Wait, what happened? Where are they standing? I think in one of the rooms. It just looked like it was secretly filmed. Yeah, it was. Tommy does not know he's being filmed.
Starting point is 00:17:59 Patrick Tico met this guy on a plane. Let's get Tommy in here. I need to get to the bottom of this. Tico sat next to him on a plane, this fan. I guess they got off the plane and went straight to the office. That's awesome. But I will say, so I did Tico 10 the other day. Comes out today.
Starting point is 00:18:18 Yes, it does at 2 o'clock. And Patrick took Brianna and I's phone to add himself on Instagram. That's his move yeah no but that's why I get so much talk to your pussy hold on if he's done it to you check your close friends list
Starting point is 00:18:30 cause he added himself whoa that is the craziest fucking move of all time I have never seen anything like that I wouldn't even know how to
Starting point is 00:18:40 add himself to your close friend and Brianna I don't even have a close friend he must have been holding your phone for like low key a long time I went to go I went to go add someone to your close friend in Brianna. I don't even have a close friend. He must have been holding your phone for like low-key a long time. I went to go add someone to my close friends this morning, like weirdly.
Starting point is 00:18:51 Actually, it was you, Gia. All right. And he was on there. Let's go. And I saw Patrick Tico. And I was like, there's no way I did that. I think that's genius. It is.
Starting point is 00:19:07 It is. It is so smart. That's kind of, that's like kind of an invasion of privacy. That's terrible. Look at this. Why are you, why, Tommy? Why do you walk like that? Why do you look like you, you got up there and you, you always look like you're just
Starting point is 00:19:19 like kind of making a noise. Yeah, you look like a, you look like a squire. All right. What was I called then? This. Did you know you were being filmed? Yesterday. Oh, yes, I did. You knew? I like Tico's brother, Patrick.
Starting point is 00:19:36 Patrick's great. He takes a lot of pictures of me every time. You turn around and he's filming you and he's putting you on his Instagram. So what was this? That is Tico's friend that she met on the plane on Sunday. So Tico's friend that she met Sunday. That is a guy that Tico met on the plane on Sunday that has now become her friend, it seems like.
Starting point is 00:20:00 I like holding this mic like this. Yeah, you look cool. Yeah, right? You look cool. All right. Oh, yeah, I just wanted to know if you were being, you look cool. Yeah, right? You look cool. All right. Oh, yeah, I just wanted to know if you were being filmed, but you looked as comfortable as ever in that video. You know, while I was looking,
Starting point is 00:20:10 it looks like I did connect on the knuckle touch. Can we play that back? Let's see, let's see, yeah. Why'd you, like, swipe at him? Yeah, you swiped a little bit. You remind me of the exhaling kid from Hey Arnold. What's his name? Eugene.
Starting point is 00:20:28 Nope. Tommy kind of looks like Eugene. You came into that strange, though. That's not very kind. And what's the guy's name? I don't remember. Knox. You met him, too?
Starting point is 00:20:40 No. Huh. But he was on Tico's Instagram story. Oh, okay. Hey, he was a nice guy i think they filmed the tico 10 what a what a cocks just on the tico 10 just just took a plane ride at the heart of barstool hq tommy nope keep going not any of these boys there is a ton of heavy breather what the fuck was his name i I never watched him. Oh, it's awesome. They have the glasses. No, which one?
Starting point is 00:21:05 Iggy. No, not Iggy. What a great show. Yeah. Search Hey Arnold Creepy Guy. Hey Arnold Heavy Breather. Oh, yeah. Oh, wait.
Starting point is 00:21:17 Yeah. Yeah. You guys stand. Brain. Brainy. Brainy. Brainy. You just need glasses.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Yeah, you guys stand like each other. All right. This was fun. I'll see you guys. You just need glasses. Yeah, you guys stand like each other. All right, this was fun. I'll see you guys. See you, Tommy. Can we pull up and watch Hey Arnold's very obvious mentally deficient cousin
Starting point is 00:21:34 that they would not say that he was? What was his name? Arnold's cousin. Didn't it rhyme with Arnold? What rhymes with Arnold? Arnold. Arnold. It was Arnie. That would be Arnold as? Arnold. Arnold. It was Arnie.
Starting point is 00:21:46 That would be Arnold as well. Yeah, his name is Arnie. You guys remember a lot of the characters' names from Hey Arnold. It was a really good show. And it was really cool. You know what was a fucked up cartoon? Courage, the Cowardly Dog. Hey Arnold, who was it?
Starting point is 00:21:57 Oh, yeah. That was scary. Fucked me up. Oh, yeah, they were hot. Yeah, that was... I'm glad we're on the same page. Yes. And Helga's older sister was hot.
Starting point is 00:22:06 Olga. She was a lesbian. She taught in Anchorage. She was not a lesbian. What made you think she was a lesbian? Just because she didn't fuck you? She was... Yeah, okay.
Starting point is 00:22:16 Got his ass. Boomed him. Headshot. You cool, Kyle? Nah, yeah. That hurt him a little bit I think if you guys wanna see some
Starting point is 00:22:29 shocking shit did you see Britney Spears' last picture I sure did that was almost more explicit than just a nude
Starting point is 00:22:36 dude I almost yelped on the subject like what kind of yelp I was like oh it's shocking. It's insane. Are we allowed to pull that up?
Starting point is 00:22:46 It's on Instagram, so I think it's fine. Yeah, it's like one of her most recent posts. I did see it. I saw this tweet about how maybe she shouldn't have gotten her conservatorship taken away because the shit that she posts now is just off the rails. Gay Pat, who sold the free Britney merch because he just pounces on a merch bonus any chance he gets, there's blood on a merch bonus any chance he gets. There's blood on his hands.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Yeah. For sure. He's the reasoning behind that. Yeah. Yeah. And now she's just posting nude Instagrams and like these insane videos of her dancing in like high speed motion. Oh. You can't. You probably can't leave or can't.
Starting point is 00:23:20 Yeah. You can't. It's on Instagram. It's on Instagram. No. What? What? It's like a flash.
Starting point is 00:23:24 It's like a flash that's like a jump scare yeah oh i only saw it with a headline i didn't see the the pussy pop it takes your breath away it was incredible dude i gotta get that printed she was the titular nude character in bs nude.com yes she looks great she won a lot of head-to-head battles on celeb fake battles yeah and then celeb jihad she gets a lot of playing time. She got knocked off by Tisdale, actually. Now, do you guys have any interest in fake nudes of male celebrities? Is that a thing that you've dabbled in? Fake nudes? Unlike your
Starting point is 00:23:51 PSP? So there's a lot of websites that render fake images of nude female celebrities. Like deep fakes? Because the real ones aren't real. What? No, Selena Gomez, there was all this stuff about her because
Starting point is 00:24:06 there was all these fake nude pictures of her that just weren't her and, like, everyone thought that it was her. Is it a deep fake? These aren't that deep at all.
Starting point is 00:24:13 It's not that deep. It's very apparent. They're very obviously fake, but it's... Do you know what deep fake is? That's like a video, right? Yeah. Yeah, and, like,
Starting point is 00:24:21 you put your face... No, these are not... This is just rudimentary Photoshop. Yeah, it's off. I don't know any men fake. I know like Noah Centineo.
Starting point is 00:24:31 You guys know that? Yeah. He has a real one, doesn't he? His news came out. And a lot of talk fakes. Bryce Hall's seen that.
Starting point is 00:24:38 Who is that? Oh, yeah, no. Noah Centineo? Not that I... He was in the To All the Boys I Loved Before. Meet the Fosters. He has a really funny unintentional... He was talking the To All the Boys I Loved Before Meet the Fosters He has a really funny
Starting point is 00:24:45 Unintentional He was talking about You kind of look like him Rudy Really? No he doesn't Suck it Nick Really low key I don't think so
Starting point is 00:24:55 Really really low key Look like that That's not an insult No it's not an insult Gorgeous man One of the hottest boys ever What is the The clip where he was like
Starting point is 00:25:03 It doesn't matter What you do for other people it's what there's like a whole he's done some funny stuff him in the garbage can he's like you know what it is
Starting point is 00:25:11 or what was that what was that do you guys remember that he was in a garbage can filled with water he's like it's that time again we're like what time it's not about what you do
Starting point is 00:25:18 it's about what you do with what you've done for others yeah doesn't he have one he's like are you gonna let me lick that pussy that's a good video are you gonna are you gonna squ, are you going to let me lick that pussy? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:26 That's a good video. Oh, yeah. Are you going to squirt? Are you going to let me see you squirt? Yeah, yeah. Can we pull that up? Just like Noah's. I just want to watch it. Let me see this guy.
Starting point is 00:25:34 Have you seen it? O'Malley? Come on. That looks just like Rudy. They have similar beard structure. That looks like The Weeknd. Yeah, he does, actually. He doesn't even look like Noah.
Starting point is 00:25:41 He's white. What? He's not a white man. Yeah, I haven't seen that version of Noah Centineo. Is that what he is now? That's like Noah Centineo after two weeks of not showering. That's like COVID. Oh, this is awesome.
Starting point is 00:25:53 Wait, your facial structures kind of match. And the face shape, too. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the nose. Oh, my God. Oh, whoa. Kind of does. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:26:03 All right, this is fair. Wait, wait. It looks just like you. What is going on? Are you doing like a filter? I don't know what pieces are him and what pieces are you. I really wish I could look. Did you just do an app?
Starting point is 00:26:17 No, he just overlaid an image. Wait, no, no. Let's go to Rudy. Whoa. And just, you know what fuck it put them over me let's overlay oh nick i want to see nicks dude it's really challenging not to smile or look like well i'm just gonna uh there's look at that one nick do you have a celebrity that people tell you you look like eyes uh like
Starting point is 00:26:42 most lesbian women. Yeah, like not. But like super butch. Of course. Oh my god. Yes. We look exactly alike. You're out tweaking. Damn. That's cool.
Starting point is 00:27:01 That is cool. Now let me see him talk about pussy squirting. It's the most uncomfortable video I've ever seen. Yeah. He's like, are you a... And he's in an airport. He's in a very public location. He's not trying to be sexy.
Starting point is 00:27:13 He's genuinely asking. So, like, are you going to, like, squirt for me? Isn't he still dating a super hot girl? Probably. No, like, he's dating someone, like, crazy attractive. I don't know. Isn't that... That's a youth thing to someone crazy attractive. I don't know. Isn't that... That's a youth thing to know.
Starting point is 00:27:28 Yeah. Yeah, come on. Jordan would not know. How about that? Put that on a t-shirt. Sorry, Jordan. I don't like being mean to you. You don't deserve it.
Starting point is 00:27:39 Wait, you said that? Yeah. Oh, I thought Gia said that. I would never. Yeah, Grace. Either him in the garbage can or him talking about squirting. I need one of the two Nikki needs his medicine. I don't know what to look up for this every result is a porn website No, not no Videos driving crazy she's hot yes, Alexis run like that was she the
Starting point is 00:28:05 Yes, yes, no. Jay Alvarez's ex-girlfriend. Yes, yes. Who's Jay Alvarez? Oh, coconut oil. Coconut oil. Coconut oil. Coconut oil.
Starting point is 00:28:12 He came out on top? He's actually a good DJ. Really? He ain't bad. He's a good skydiver, too. Yeah, I bet. How are you a good skydiver? Somebody recently told me that he is out of reach for great work.
Starting point is 00:28:27 Oh, my God. Oh, it of reach oh he's in public you're gonna show me how you squirt what platform is this on I lowkey wanna make that video now are any of you attracted to that no not of that vote like he was saying that I will say when to all the boys when that came out he blew up everyone was like oh my god he's so hot
Starting point is 00:28:43 whatever like I love him and then all of a sudden, something changed, and he became the most cringey, creepy, weird guy. I think that was probably up on his close friends and Patrick Tico screen recording. I mean, I can't get over that still. So I walked into work this morning, because I just found out
Starting point is 00:29:02 this morning, and I'm like, Brianna, check your close friends right now. He was on it? Fair enough. Okay. That's a repeat offender. Yeah. I can justify it, I think.
Starting point is 00:29:13 Can you, Kyle? No, if I was a dude, I would start pulling that all the time. Yeah. I don't know. That's such an invasion of privacy. To be honest, I don't know what's on a girl's close friends. I haven't made it. I mean, nothing. But how often do you check? It's always underwhelming know what's on a girl's close friends. I haven't made it. I mean, nothing,
Starting point is 00:29:26 but how often do you check? It's always underwhelming. It's never like, so underwhelming. And how often are you like, here's my phone, type in your username. Like,
Starting point is 00:29:34 I don't do that. Yeah, he was very, it was very important that we gave him his phone to add. We're like, no, just tell us your username.
Starting point is 00:29:39 Yeah, that's what I do. Defend your man, Kyle. He's networking. Dude, it was so wrong. You're catching the wrong side of the...
Starting point is 00:29:45 So are you going to take him off and just hope he doesn't notice? Of course I took him off. What the fuck is this? We might have to ask him what the fuck... Fasoli, do not film him. No, Fasoli, you son of a bitch. Why is he laughing about it?
Starting point is 00:29:58 Can we pull up Nick Fasoli's first in the office? He's the only one that can have a timid yell. That ruined my morning. I'm the first in the office. Wait, what? one that could have a timid yell. That ruined my morning. Wait, what? He yelled in lowercase. Ready to roll. Ready to roll. He yelled in lowercase.
Starting point is 00:30:15 He yelled in parentheses. Can we pull that up? I love clowning Fastuli. He's the best. He's the best at clown. Fastuli. i really like him he's like looking around to make sure nobody catches him i am the first in the office ready to roll and now can we go to the first reply go to the first reply go to Kevin Zupi's reply No you're not Ready to roll
Starting point is 00:30:47 There's a clear There's a clear eye roll At the end Oh my god What a fucking Yo Kevin Shut the fuck down Shut the fuck up
Starting point is 00:30:55 Get out of frame Get out of frame Yeah that is literally Screaming in lower quarters That was like a fake And he tweeted that at 946 There's no way No one was here
Starting point is 00:31:04 Before 946 Wow It's a way no one was here before 946. Wow. It's a Friday. It's a Friday. Did you see the waves at the girl in the lobby? She didn't return it. She didn't return it? I met her once.
Starting point is 00:31:16 No, you didn't. Oh, through to Patrick Tico. Double birds? Oh. There he is. Why is he wearing a shirt today? He looks fly. He looks fly. He's coming. He's making himself known. Oh, there he is. Why is he wearing a shirt today? He looks fly. He looks fly.
Starting point is 00:31:26 He's coming. He's making himself known. He's got to show us the details. Grace, are you going to call him out? What's up? The details. Why are you wearing a shirt today? Squat.
Starting point is 00:31:37 Yesterday you did it. There's a mic on the floor. It's a little heavy. Grab it on the floor. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got a bone to pick. I left this open just for you. Oh.
Starting point is 00:31:48 I'm a lucky girl. She gets the open chest special. You know what I'm saying? I'm sure that means. You said you love it. I do love it. Don't front now. No, I do love it.
Starting point is 00:31:58 I think it's great. Patrick, I have a bone to pick with you. Hold on, why? Okay, okay, wait, wait. Hold on. Before she says it, predict what she's going to say. You know you were wrong.
Starting point is 00:32:12 Damn. I'm on the spot here. Have you done anything, maybe not wrong, but like... Questionable? Invasive? I was...
Starting point is 00:32:19 During my interview, I was a little grabby. Okay. Oh! Oh, no, no, no. My bad. My bad. Just a little bit.
Starting point is 00:32:30 Oh, Jesus Christ, Bash. Me and my sister were both hella drunk at that point. Okay. There we go. It's a good tactic because this is going to seem very underwhelming now. Oh, shit. Okay. What's the bone then?
Starting point is 00:32:44 What's up? I can't tell. Is it because we didn't go out on thatming now. Oh, shit. Okay, what's the bone there? What's up? I can't tell. Is it because we didn't go out on that date yet? Oh, Jesus. Jesus. You pulled a technique that it's controversial to some, but I fuck with it. There we go. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:32:56 It's a social media technique. Thank you. Because he does it so frequently. Kyle? You ask for their phone, and then you pull a move. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. I did.
Starting point is 00:33:09 Okay. On Instagram? Again, don't say anything that's, like, too extreme, because this isn't that bad. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So I said, you know, put me in your close friends. Nope. There we go.
Starting point is 00:33:21 You said it to yourself. You said it to yourself in your head. Yeah. Well, I mean, because they gave me the phone, so I figured if I told you to put me in close friends, you'd give me your phone, I was going to put myself in that. Put yourself right in. You feel me?
Starting point is 00:33:32 I'm on. I feel you. No, I don't recall him. Maybe if you asked. Nick, Nick, KB. Yeah, I did ask. I said it out loud. I swear.
Starting point is 00:33:41 Rudy, you know Patrick? She says different. She says different. I just remember it differently. KB and Nick, you know Patrice? She says different. She says different. I just remember it differently. KB and Nick, you know I don't lie. I'm always 100. You know, I'm a 100. With you and I, always been 100.
Starting point is 00:33:52 Yeah, exactly. So what happened was I was like, yo, hey, add me to your close friends on Instagram. You know? And then, you know, they gave me their phones to put my name in, so I just put myself in the close friends. You did it fast. You did it pretty quick. I mean, listen, quick figures.
Starting point is 00:34:07 You know what I'm saying? I don't know what that means. No, no, no, no. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying. No, but Tico 10 comes out at 2 today. 2 today, Tico 10. That shit's crazy.
Starting point is 00:34:17 Run your promo, twin. I'm excited for that. Oh, yeah, Tico 10 come out at 2. You know, we did it. You know, a lot of hugging and grabbing and talking. Interesting, yeah. And a lot of secrets getting revealed. If that is like order of...
Starting point is 00:34:30 Oh. A lot of... Yeah, a lot of secrets getting spilled. A lot of secrets. A lot of secrets getting spilled. Are there more secrets or more grabbing? I told my mom not to watch it. Yeah, no mothers can watch it.
Starting point is 00:34:39 It's literally, it's like rated M. My mom will watch it. I'm so good at it. And not... She'll find a way to critique me. It's not rated M for mothers, though. Yeah. Not rated M for mothers. Rated M for mature. Mature. Yeah, mature. It's not rated M for mothers. Not rated M for mothers.
Starting point is 00:34:47 Rated M for mature. Mature. Yeah, mature. That's right. Exactly. So, I mean, it's going to be wild. Y'all definitely got to check it out. You know, I said a lot of crazy shit.
Starting point is 00:35:00 I actually told some people something I never said about, you know, you asked me about the sex thing when I was younger. Yeah. We're just. Dog, what? Okay, so, you know, I'm not going to repeat it on here because you got to go watch it to find out. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:35:09 That's good promo. They asked me, where was... On yesterday's anus, we talked about the sex thing when we were younger as well. Yeah. But it wasn't inside the anus,
Starting point is 00:35:18 though, for me. Oh, okay. I'm sorry. To clarify. To clarify. No idea. Yeah, you know, because I know you guys,
Starting point is 00:35:24 you know, a little different, you know. What's your sexy ass? I appreciate it, man. You know, I'm trying to do my thing. You know what I'm saying? Look good. Just like you. You know, all you guys look good.
Starting point is 00:35:33 Damn right. Yeah, for sure. Thank you, Patrick. Who is the best fit right now? Besides you. Besides you. Best fit. Chill out.
Starting point is 00:35:41 This is a bad ass fit. Man. So not Grace you guys all look like shit listen Grace is on my ass right now Grace is a beef squash oh squashed up squashed up
Starting point is 00:35:55 that's the good metaphor I didn't know it was that bad that was not my intention no I just don't think you should keep doing that I think I'd be a little disappointed a little disappointed That was not my intention. Never is. I just don't think you should keep doing that. I think I'd be a little disappointed. A little disappointed. It's invasive.
Starting point is 00:36:14 Girls post some juicy stuff on their close friends. What? Yeah, we do. I didn't mean it like that. I think it's like a regional thing, like calling a water fountain a bubbler. Yes, we do. It's more common and acceptable in the Houston metro area. Yeah, my bad. We might just be from different places. It's a Houston thing. Yes, we do. It's more common and acceptable in the Houston metro area. Yeah, yeah. My bad.
Starting point is 00:36:25 We might just be from different places. It's a Houston thing. What if Grace posted a nude? For us, it's more like a friendly thing. Definitely.
Starting point is 00:36:33 For us, it was more like a friendly thing. Oh, you my boy. I'm your girl. You know what I'm saying? We cool. You know what I'm saying?
Starting point is 00:36:39 So I was like, yeah, add me to the close friends. I had no problem with it. Appreciate you, bro. My close friends is just fairly intimate. There's like five people on it. Oh, see, I didn't know that.
Starting point is 00:36:45 No, it's all good. It's all good. It's all good. Beep squash. Beep squash. Just go down. Who you with? Who you with?
Starting point is 00:36:53 Some guests? Who are your guests today? Those are my sisters. What? What? You have more sisters? I have more sisters. Are they Ticos?
Starting point is 00:37:01 We don't qualify for them for Ticos, but they are sisters. That was my sister in the black. Hey, sister. Like metaphorically? Yeah, I don't qualify for them for Tico's but they are sisters that was my sister in the black hey sister like metaphorically yeah I don't understand
Starting point is 00:37:10 okay listen we're revealing secrets over here tag me tag me listen we're revealing secrets over here
Starting point is 00:37:17 oh why are they so giddy they've never seen KB before that shit they like that hey they love people who look like Owen Wilson what's that what's that mean what do you. They love people who look like Owen Wilson.
Starting point is 00:37:26 What's that mean? What do you mean? Wait, Nick. Do you look like Owen Wilson? What the fuck are you talking about? Is that something funny? Do we all just look like
Starting point is 00:37:35 Owen Wilson to you? That's like all white people are baseball players who look like Owen Wilson. I didn't realize my mic was on. Listen, she left out hockey players, you know?
Starting point is 00:37:44 Hell yeah. Lacrosse? Shit hockey players, you know? Hell yeah. Lacrosse? Shit, Rudy, you're in. God damn it. Everything's coming up Rudy. You got to give y'all the whole thing. So they're not your blood? You're not related to them?
Starting point is 00:37:56 No, the one in black, yeah. Okay. Is she also Tico's sister? Yes. So is she a Tico? No. What does that mean? Do you have to earn that title? We're going to save that story for a different one. It's like a Tico? No. What does that mean? Do you have to earn that title?
Starting point is 00:38:06 We're going to say that story for a different reason. It's like a lordship. Exactly. Yeah. Exactly. And they like surfs or something. Oh. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:38:14 That's like history. Is that an insult? No, it's just a... I was not expecting that. Do you get it like on a certain birthday? Yeah. They ain't reached it yet. I finally got my Tico.
Starting point is 00:38:27 Wait, how old are you, Tico? Man, chill out. Listen. That's information we do not divulge. You can be on O'Malley's close friends to know all her personal information. We can't know how old you are? Damn straight. That is true.
Starting point is 00:38:38 You owe them. Patrick? You owe us that. Oh, damn. You owe them a secret. 31. 33? You have the chest of a younger man. Well, damn. You owe them a secret. Cough, cough. 31. 33?
Starting point is 00:38:48 You have the chest of a younger man. Well, you know what? You know, they say that, you know, I look a little bit younger. You do. Yeah. Yeah, you do. I wouldn't. I thought Tico was, like, younger than me.
Starting point is 00:38:57 I thought she was, like, 23. I didn't. I don't know how old Tico is. You both are ageless. They're twins. We're twins. I might have been lying and said that. Yeah, I don't know how. Oh, Tico's going to be mad at you.
Starting point is 00:39:06 She won't be mad, you know? But she looks like she's like 12. Yeah, she looks great. Exactly. 12? You said she looks great? No, I said 23. She looks like she's 12, and you said, yeah, she looks great.
Starting point is 00:39:18 We got her. We got her. You don't like 12-year-olds or something like that? 12-year-olds can't look great. Yeah, some people can. She's nice to me. Jordan is nice. Thanks, Jordan. Compliments the fit. You don't like 12-year-olds or something like that? 12-year-olds can't look great. She's nice to me. Jordan is nice. Compliments a fit.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I think Grace is being too nice to me, too. What's your name? I'm Gia. Gia? Yes. That's cool. Thanks. Is there a single named Gia?
Starting point is 00:39:41 There was a model. There was a model named Gia. She died of a cocaine overdose. I am Gia. That's not going to be your future. No. Madeline. Mad Dog. So you'd be barking.
Starting point is 00:39:58 Bark, bitch. You know like the 2020? Mad Dog 2020. Oh, okay. All right, that's what's up. They're good. You know like the 2020 Yeah Mad Dog 2020 Oh okay Alright that's what's up That's cool They're good I used to drink those
Starting point is 00:40:09 I've actually never had it Oh that's a drink Mad Dog 2020 is like an alcohol Oh I've never had it though So good Me neither We should bring those in
Starting point is 00:40:17 And try them They're so good There's some in the Part of my take studio I think probably I'm not gonna try them Next time I'm out of here
Starting point is 00:40:22 Cause I don't wanna repeat What happened last time you told me you love chocolate so much that you know I just thought I'd give you an overdose I fully indulged in it until I got home and I realized
Starting point is 00:40:37 chocolate hangover I can't get over this you're fine we're good squash like squash squash KB will be cool with you I can't get over this. You'll get over it. You're fine. We're fine. We're good. Squash like squash. Squash. KB will be cool with you.
Starting point is 00:40:52 You want to meet those girls out there, Kyle? Yeah. No. I'll talk to them when the show ends. They're pretty dry. They're going to come in here and dry this place up. What do you mean? Pretty dry.
Starting point is 00:41:02 They're dry? She's not a real Tico. She's a half Tico. I don't know what that means. You don't know what dry means? I don't know what the half Tico means. You're a half Tico. Half sister.
Starting point is 00:41:12 I know, but they're twins. They probably share a pair. No, it's Tico. Tico and Patrick are twins. I'm assuming that that girl is going to share a parent. Oh, yes. Either the mother or the father. Maybe the same dad.
Starting point is 00:41:25 They're talking shit. They're talking about boys. Probably Chris Brown. It always is. Or Nick. Who's talking about Chris Brown? Nick is like half as shared. No. I guess
Starting point is 00:41:45 Nah it's a good thing Yeah it's a real good thing It is man It is You could be a stunt double Yeah that's awesome Yeah So he gets me the face
Starting point is 00:41:56 I'm the body At least you don't look like Lesbian Actresses He does What do you mean I mean He looks like a Hollywood star.
Starting point is 00:42:05 I just don't know which one. It's somebody. Noah Centineo, maybe? Something like Assassin something. An assassin? Hell yeah. Thank you, Patrick. Like who?
Starting point is 00:42:14 We can't have Rudy on anymore. Patrick, did you ever log in mad hours to Madden growing up? Nah, not really, dog. 2K, a little bit. NFL. You never played Madden? I played a little bit of Madden. What? Nah, not really, dog. 2K, a little bit. NFL. You never played Madden? I played a little bit of Madden. What you trying to get at?
Starting point is 00:42:29 He trying to set me up. That's why I'm not agreeing with him all the way. I was just thinking about it. Oh, okay. You were just thinking about Madden? I know. R.I.P. No, you...
Starting point is 00:42:37 Oh, damn. Kyle, where were you going with that? I was just thinking of Madden. The guy died. I was thinking about... I used to play 2001. Really? That was the first time my parents
Starting point is 00:42:46 considered the idea that I might be gay because I would just put the game in and just listen to the anthem by Good Charlotte and lip-sync it and dance and twerk to Shake It once. Do we have videos? No. That was a wild-ass core memory right there.
Starting point is 00:43:03 That was a bit of a trauma dump. You're going to try to relate to Patrick with that story? Yeah. Twerking at a good Charlotte? I didn't twerk. He's trying to clown me for twerking at the end of the last episode. Oh, yeah. He's trying to embarrass me.
Starting point is 00:43:18 That's what KB does. He embarrasses me. He embarrasses me. Ellen is like the worst of the lesbians to be compared to why because she's a bitch she's cancelled
Starting point is 00:43:29 yeah she is yeah she is a huge bitch yeah she's a woman yeah Nick why don't you ever shave your beard that's what we're on
Starting point is 00:43:37 so I don't have to do a hundred days of giveaways oh my oh the eyes oh the eyes oh that's scary I wonder what that would look like on me.
Starting point is 00:43:46 It wouldn't blend well. Dude, you could be like an Ellen Bastard. Yeah, maybe. She experimented once. Then you came out? Whoa, this is like some freaky Matrix shit. What?
Starting point is 00:44:00 You think I could be like Black Keanu Reeves, maybe? Yeah. Ah, Patrick. I'm not. Ah, Patrick. Now I'm looking more like the major director. I know what you're saying, Patrick. Yeah, you know what? Maybe the smile.
Starting point is 00:44:17 You have zero in common with Ellen DeGeneres. I don't know. I see it. You see it? I see it. Who likes pussy more, you or her? You know what? That's a great question I don't know
Starting point is 00:44:29 He doesn't really fuck with pussy like that Or sex like that You know what thank you for exposing our private conversation No but in the whole way Where would you guys have a chance to have a private conversation Cause we were on the same page You said sometimes you're just not feeling it. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so me and KB agreed
Starting point is 00:44:47 that sex is something, you know, you do it, it burns out. You meet somebody, you do it again, it kind of burns out. It's not something you should just do just because you feel like doing it. No. I respect that. Exactly. We're saying men usually just fuck whoever
Starting point is 00:45:03 they can get. But we're kind of on that page where even if she's beautiful, we can still say no and we're just chilling. That's gospel. You're like the opposite of Dan Bilzerian. I was just going to say that. From the low testament. I'm with that.
Starting point is 00:45:18 You're with that. I'm with it. We got to rewrite the bro bible, man. That's refreshing to hear. Yeah, because that's not all it's about. Amen. Talk to Dan B. about that one. I just want to be loved.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Dan B. Dan Bilzerian. Oh, really? Oh, yeah. Nah, he's hopeless. He's done. He's a lost cause. He's a lost cause, man.
Starting point is 00:45:39 He's cooked. Great. So you were on a tour with thousands of rabid fans. Anything weird or creepy happen happened any interactions or scenarios just a girl spitting in our mouths oh wow cool let's talk about that did she sneak up and do it no it wasn't a sneaky spit uh it was uh she came to the meet and greet and sensual or brianna to bird her. To what? Like baby bird her. And, you know. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:46:07 Regurgitate your meal. I don't understand. And then she started crying and she was so happy. And she goes, I gotta go kiss O'Malley. And she came up and just smacked one on me. Yeah. That's assault. We kiss more women than men.
Starting point is 00:46:22 Well, we, me. So nah, you're speaking for're speaking she has a boyfriend so so you all right you guys show up on these college campuses um and what do you do first you go to like out to eat yes we do actually and then what happens and then um like you like that's like a mall like the thursday night's a chill night we gather we're good friday we have the meet and greet and then the party and um somewhere in between the meet and greet and then the party and somewhere in between the meet and greet
Starting point is 00:46:47 is when we just like going right into a vortex of like there's no return what's the pregame meal we Brianna and I don't really do you get fast food
Starting point is 00:46:55 or do you like go to a sit down restaurant we usually sit down and then I think we've gotten Chipotle every single time and those are our two meals for the whole weekend
Starting point is 00:47:04 the whole weekend oh okay yeah I think you guys should start doing that kind of stuff for the anus life tour out in Chipotle every single time. Those are our two meals. For the whole weekend. I think you guys should start doing that kind of stuff for the Anus Life Tour. Me and KB, we did a Nick and KB pop-up in Chinatown last week. Didn't do well. No one wanted to spit in your mouth? Did not do well.
Starting point is 00:47:20 I didn't see any promotion for that or anything. It was out there. You're in these clubs behind on the stage for like three, four hours? No, like, yeah, actually, yeah. It kind of looks like the Travis Scott. No, so that's what we were really scared about. People getting bodied.
Starting point is 00:47:40 We were stopping it saying, like, is everyone all right? Yeah, yeah. I didn't even think about that. No, that's one thing we got, like, getting nervous about. But, yeah, no, it saying like is everyone all right yeah yeah i didn't even think about that we know that that's one thing we got like getting nervous about but yeah no it's like wicked sick no on i run it is it's crazy i mean and like i know everyone shits on her because i think she's up there like lip syncing and stuff but i don't know not for that reason rihanna's an entertainer like she truly knows how to entertain a crowd. So oust them. You guys.
Starting point is 00:48:09 We talk shit on everyone, but we never talk shit on the fact that she sells out venues and has a rabid following. Also, I think the more that people talk shit, the more bad. Because she's legit. You know what I mean? Talk shit because she's legit. Invite me in, KB. Yeah, I like that, Gia. Yeah, right? cause like, she's legit. You know what I mean? Talk shit cause she's legit. Invite me in,
Starting point is 00:48:25 KB. I like that, Gia. Yeah, right. Let's do it. Cool. I wish you had one in the city
Starting point is 00:48:31 so we could all go. We're gonna. Oh, you are? Yeah, that's the final one. I'm going. Patrick,
Starting point is 00:48:36 you don't drink. Not really, but you know. Wait, wait, you told me you don't drink at all and then you said you were drunk. Okay,
Starting point is 00:48:43 so, yeah, so what happened was, I don't drink, but for the show, I, you told me you don't drink at all, and then you said you were drunk. Okay, so what happened was I don't drink. You always tell the truth. But for the show, I was toasted because I don't drink. So we had a few shots, and that was it. I think I was leaning on her for the rest of the show at the end by the time it was over. Yeah, we all laid on top of each other.
Starting point is 00:48:59 Yes, we literally did. The two Ticos, Brianna and I. It was nice. Tico on the outside? Was it Tico bread? Yeah, it was the sandwich. Oh, yeah, yeah, and I. It was nice. Tico on the outside? Was it Tico bread? Yeah, it was the sandwich. Oh, yeah, yeah. It was a Tico sandwich.
Starting point is 00:49:09 All Ticos on our side, none on the inside. The meat and lettuce. Okay, so you guys were the bread? Yeah, we were the bread. Okay. You know, we made them jam, you know? And we sure did jam. And we spread.
Starting point is 00:49:19 Yeah, you know, the way we hit the floor was, you know, crazy. I actually protected you because I put my arm in. Listen. The way you hit the floor? crazy. I actually protected you because I put my arm in. Listen. The way you hit the floor? Yeah, I saved her life. What happened in this show? I didn't get credit for saving her life. We didn't know.
Starting point is 00:49:34 I just did. Yeah, but you should have started with that first. You should be like, well, Patrick saved me. Before I criticized Patrick, he saved my life. I would have actually been better. You see what I'm saying? Next time. That'll be a good t-shirt. I'm so confused. Patrick Tico saved my life. I would actually have been better. You see what I'm saying? Next time. That'll be a good t-shirt.
Starting point is 00:49:45 I'm so confused. Patrick Tico saved my life. Yes. So she fell, and I risked my watch and my hand, and we smashed it to the ground. We sure did smash. HR nightmare.
Starting point is 00:50:00 I thought we weren't going to talk about that. I'm scared to watch this when this comes out. You would think that you can do things like this, but we do. We are. You can say whatever. Yeah, this is true. Until you lose a brand deal. What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:50:15 We didn't really say anything. I feel like that could happen to somebody if you don't watch yourself. They came crawling back. They always do. I know you're not supposed to tell if you don't watch yourself. They came crawling back. They always do. I know you're not supposed to tell everyone at work that you watch their stuff, but I watch this every day. Same. Oh, yeah. Same.
Starting point is 00:50:32 I'm an avid listener of Enos and Son of a Boy Dad. Me and Grace were just swapping yak facts back and forth the other day. Yeah? It was incredible. What kind of facts? Give me a fact. Give us a quiz. This is fucking surreal.
Starting point is 00:50:43 Yeah, this is wild. Madeline told me that she went back. If you would have told me two years ago. She goes home and watches the Yak from like two years ago. Not two years ago, like April. I love that. Because they're nice. I tell everyone this.
Starting point is 00:50:55 What's your favorite Yak episode? Tommy Walker Day. Tommy Walker Day. That was a good one. That's a good one. No, but I'll go watch ones from like March, April. Just to like put something on the TV. Just to get to know you guys better.
Starting point is 00:51:08 We're stoked to be here. Did you go viral a few years ago? I did. For what? Me and my roommates dressed up as Pitbull for Halloween. That was you. Oh, yeah. See that?
Starting point is 00:51:18 Yeah. Thank you for bringing that up. You're not Frances. No, I'm the Pitbull girl. So you guys dressed up like Pitbull. Yes. Like bald caps. And it was posted on Barstool, and it got like one point something million views.
Starting point is 00:51:30 And what did you do? Well, it's 14. Yes! Yes! Let's go! Which one's you? Damn, that's impressive. Wait, Gia, this is you?
Starting point is 00:51:40 I have 13 roommates. Yes. You had 13 roommates? Yes. Yes. And we all lived in a house. Yeah. My roommates are going to shit themselves.
Starting point is 00:51:50 You guys are rocking it. This is me. Oh, my. I would have never guessed. I remember seeing this. Yep. You guys look like a whole bunch of Pitbull agent smits. And Pitbull noticed us.
Starting point is 00:52:04 He retweeted the tweet and tagged me in it it was like great job did you see yeah yeah it was awesome we went to we went to we went to the bar and we they brought us up on the dj booth and they played pitbull and people were going crazy what inspired that idea so the girl so the house gets passed down through my sorority and the girls that lived there before us they all dressed up as ellen oh and they almost got on ellen by doing that and it was this whole like it didn't go we went more viral but we thought oh shit we have to like do one step up above that like what can be that or be funnier than that and to be honest i feel like after me and my friends did that
Starting point is 00:52:47 so many people started to dress up as people guy fieri is a huge one too a lot of people were going to pitbull dress as pitbull yes like recently yes yeah yeah and it was oh my god it was the peak of my life like stay a while sit on on Jordan's lap. See, you know, I would do that, but after this whole thing, yeah, I definitely wouldn't. I mean, or we could switch it, but after this whole O'Malley thing, you know, we got to let this go.
Starting point is 00:53:15 You got to let it breathe. We got to let it breathe a little bit. Calm down, Kyle. You've been pulling facts of all the guests we've had. Someone just liked my pitbull tweets. I've been hardwiring. Someone on Twitter just liked my pitbull tweets. Someone on Twitter just liked my Pitbull tweets.
Starting point is 00:53:26 Oh, nice. That's those diehard Yak fans. They are loyal. Yeah, it was so much fun. It was awesome. We thought that we were going to be... We wanted like a Pitbull shout out, like a video or something. I mean, he tweeted you an ad.
Starting point is 00:53:42 And it was just you of 13 girls? They had to have hated you. No, no, no. Are you still close with them? Yeah, oh my God, yeah. They're also my best friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have 12 best friends.
Starting point is 00:53:51 You have a lot of them. I have a lot of them. Name all 12 right now. She has so many friends. You want me to? Yes, I want you to name them. Kate, Sydney, Ellery, Steph. Actually, I wouldn't know
Starting point is 00:53:58 if you were wrong. Yeah, that's true. Okay. That's like Good Will Hunting. Yeah. And you would think it would be kind of a shit show, but it actually was very smooth.
Starting point is 00:54:08 All two years of us living together, we never had a huge blowout fight or anything like that. It was great. Kyle's been nard warding, so am I. Grace, you have a gross accent. That's incredible. Where do you go from there? Why don't you say something for us?
Starting point is 00:54:25 Your mother's a whore. Thank you, Grace. It really just comes on when I'm... I've heard it. Yeah, it's not that bad. That clip of you and Brie, yeah, it's so funny. Out of control. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:34 It's disgusting. Yeah, you're right. It's disgusting. I love a good Boston accent. I'm not even going to try to defend it. It's awful. Jordan, you have an accent too. Jordan and I have similar accents.
Starting point is 00:54:43 Hers is a little bit more north. She has like a... It goes like a Canadian accent to everything, but it's not disgusting. Jordan and I have similar accents. Hers is a little bit more north. She has like a Canadian accent. But it's not disgusting, so that's good. No, I'm... Rudy, do girls ever compliment your accent? I'm sure they do. You're done for accent. I don't have an accent.
Starting point is 00:54:56 They'll do it anyway. Yeah, I don't have one. The only thing that Colorado has is Colorado. Colorado. You say rado if you're from Colorado. Jordan, I noticed you say opinion Instead of opinion Don't do that Yeah but is opinion
Starting point is 00:55:07 Spelled with an A or an O Oh It's an opinion Oh no what What the fuck was that Does opinion begin with an A No she says You say opinion
Starting point is 00:55:17 Not opinion I go Is opinion spelled with an A or an O You're actually saying Something smart That's not That's not words That's not really
Starting point is 00:55:24 What about onion? Do you say onion? Do you say onion? Yeah, I do. Yeah, she does. You gotta eat an onion. How do you guys say what's on top of a house?
Starting point is 00:55:34 Roof. Roof. It's a roof. That's stupid. You're talking about the O's like you know everything about O's. Yeah, what are you,
Starting point is 00:55:42 the O queen? So I actually, I just downloaded Hinge. I did an audio thing, and that's my thing. I've seen these, and this almost makes me want to do it. I've been killing Hinge because of that. Everyone replies. No one ever says that.
Starting point is 00:56:00 And they argue with me. I'm killing Hinge right now. I cannot say I feel the same way about my Hinge experience. They're insulting me, but it's Hinge. What are you saying in the, what is your voice prompt? Give me one. I got the best prompts on my page. You guys say, you, Nick, you say like pull and pool weird.
Starting point is 00:56:17 He does. Like your U's and your O's are weird. Yeah, maybe so. It's been called out in the past. It's been called out a lot. Also, I just want to say I downloaded Hinge purely just because of the voice. No, you want to have sex with people like everyone else. We don't believe that.
Starting point is 00:56:32 Your reason is the same as everyone in the world. You want to have sex with people. Or you want to have a boyfriend. No, God, no. Then you don't want to do it just to get your bits off. You know Woodruff and her bits. Was you just lonely like one night and just was like. No, I was bored.
Starting point is 00:56:51 Good question. Lonely, yeah. But no, I literally just wanted to try out the voice prompt because TikTok kept feeding it to me. And I was like, this is funny, so I did it. Play it. Say what the prompt is. A quick rant about what a quick totally um the thing that's on top of a house is a roof not a roof prove me wrong
Starting point is 00:57:18 and that just gets oh you're an engagement poster you're an engagement you know what you're an engagement poster. You're an engagement poster. You know what you're doing. She went viral on it. Yeah, viral on it. So you're saying you just wanted a little confidence boost? You didn't want to pork? You didn't want... She just wants that dopamine dump. I feel like so many girls download Hinge, Tinder, whatever, just to have the confidence boost.
Starting point is 00:57:42 Jordan is going to be helping Ben Mintz with his Hinge. I swear, she was like, your voice, you've got to get on hinge. Yeah, the single women in Hoboken want him. He's going to do that. He's back getting chicks on Pick Central today. What? He called out Dallas' area code.
Starting point is 00:57:57 We were talking about Dallas, and they were like, how did you know that? He was like, well, I got this girl's number. Mintz. He was the one that brought up the Calgary pussy. Was he? No. Mintz has never been to Canada. Well, he did get mobbed on Bourbon Street.
Starting point is 00:58:12 No, he was all butt mobbed. All butt mobbed on Bourbon Street. Yeah. Yeah, so. One of the things I don't know is why do girls need extra confidence boosts when everybody tells you guys, you guys are pretty? I don't. Do they?
Starting point is 00:58:23 I mean- I don't think I'm getting that. I don't think I've ever- That hasn't happened recently. No. There's probably some guy who tells you guys, but you are pretty. I don't. Do they? I don't think I'm getting that. I don't think I've ever. That hasn't happened recently. No. There's probably some guy who tells you guys, but you guys be like, oh, that's just my friend. Are you friends on them or something? I don't have male friends.
Starting point is 00:58:33 What are Nick and KB and Rudy? What about the fuck? What the fuck? We're not homies? Yeah. We're not friends. What are you talking about? What are you?
Starting point is 00:58:41 I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. On Raw Shirt Day, no less. I'm kidding. KB, you really believe people are not telling these gorgeous women that they're beautiful? Most of the time it's like anonymous, like no profile picture people sliding into your DMs.
Starting point is 00:58:52 I've never gotten a compliment from either of these three. I think you're the funniest in this room. Give us a compliment. I want a compliment from each one of you. Don't say that. We're stuck in a purgatory where we can't. They've never once given me a compliment. Because we're in a... This morning I walked past you and't. They've never once given me a compliment. Because we're in a...
Starting point is 00:59:05 This morning, I walked past you and said, nice lavender. That's not a compliment. He meant to say, look, really beautiful. That sounds like
Starting point is 00:59:12 a compliment to me. That sounds like a compliment. Listen, yes. We just gotta give him some lessons. No, I'm a fucking incel, dude. Leave me alone. No, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:59:20 Vol cell, actually. I can poo anybody I want. I was called a fence cell last night. What does that mean? Riley? That's hilarious. That's somebody who can't have fun.
Starting point is 00:59:32 What does that mean? A fem cell? It's the female version of an incel. Riley called me a fem cell. That's fucking awesome. And I disagree with that statement, Riley. I do too. I love Mad Dog.
Starting point is 00:59:44 A woman who can't see in a Riley. I do, too. Thank you. I love Mad Dog. KB, you're a, what are they called? A woman who can't stand a relationship. I'm a height setter. Rudy is in here, mogged. Becky is in here. Yeah, he's a, I don't know. That's why I didn't want him on. I hate being mogged.
Starting point is 00:59:55 That's tough. I'm so. Male manipulator. I'll buy that merch. Male manipulator. I don't know. Yeah, what's that, huh? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:00:02 What the fuck is that? Male manipulator music is like good music. I did. I started reading my first John Green book when I was 13. Oh, my God. Wait, girls, we should, like, go out for drinks. Okay. Totally, girl.
Starting point is 01:00:18 We don't have anything to do after this. The Chelsea Bell? Run over to the Chelsea Bell, we'll split a flatbread. You and I. What about the Triple Crown? What's that? Get a corndog. Oh, good shepherd's pie over at the corner. What's Chelsea Bell. Run over to the Chelsea Bell. We'll split a flatbread. What about the Triple Crown? Get a corndog. Oh, Good Shepherd's Pie over at the Corndog. What's Chelsea Bell? The heaviest food you can buy. Yes, yes. Let's do it.
Starting point is 01:00:32 Oh my god. I can't. Okay, twin. Why? Good twin. Fuck it up. No, I have therapy at 4 o'clock. Pre-game it. Put yourself first, girl. Pre-game therapy. Oh, that's awesome. No. What kind of therapy you. Pregame therapy. Oh, that's awesome. No. What kind of therapy you got?
Starting point is 01:00:48 Mental health therapy. Oh, really? Is this real? Yeah. It's a very normal thing. Normalized therapy. Oh, yeah, therapy. I think it's been too normalized.
Starting point is 01:01:00 We got to start going reverted. Patrick, are you comfy? That's how Tommy Pickles sits when he's rolling a ball to Phil. Lil and Phil. The old finster looking ass. After the night I had, which I will not disclose. He's about to fucking hop out the playpen. After the night you had. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:17 Which I will not expose. Oh, my God. That is so funny. Sitting like a pickles over there. But we're not going to let her tell what happened. So, no, but my ass hurts. You know what I'm saying? Wait, you said after? sitting like a pickles over there but we're not gonna let her tell what happened so nah but my ass hurts you know what I'm saying
Starting point is 01:01:27 wait you said after the night you had yo my ass hurts I'm gonna stop you there yeah yeah you set yourself up
Starting point is 01:01:37 damn it you set yourself up you just said it you got a cap set though man like damn it I think we all caught that yeah after the night
Starting point is 01:01:44 I was out all night and a lot of crazy shit happened activities so I didn't get to sit down now I'm sitting down Patrick I have to
Starting point is 01:01:53 go to a meeting do you want to steal my chair oh really you serious company woman what's the meeting for work like a girl
Starting point is 01:02:00 I need to eat that's important you don't feed everybody else work like a girl hell yeah I'm about to go order some soup too I ordered it Maddie eats soup Girl, I need to eat. Oh, that's important. You need to eat. You're going to feed everybody else? No, my Hale and Hardy are sitting right there. Hell yeah, Hale. I'm about to go order some soup, too. I ordered it because of you.
Starting point is 01:02:08 Oh, I almost did that. Maddie eats soup every single day. I love soup. Hale and Hardy every day. If Hale and Hardy wants to send me free soup, I would happily oblige. Same. Oh, yeah. Hardy every day.
Starting point is 01:02:16 If Hale and Hardy wants to send me free soup, I would happily oblige. Same. Oh, yeah. Okay. Love you guys. 10x. Bye. Oh, whoa.
Starting point is 01:02:24 Oh, she's talking to the yak chat She knows exactly What she's fucking doing Follow Maddie Listen to Macro Dosing Yes And Cause I Said So Yes
Starting point is 01:02:33 And Cause I Said So Mad Dog 2020 Is that her handle? 2022 Yeah Well I guess it's 2022 I keep saying 2020 That would make a lot of sense
Starting point is 01:02:42 Cause 2020 is alcohol Is it not? Do they change it every year? Oh. No, it's like the mixture, I think. I thought you were saying Mad Dog all 2020. No, I got nowhere to be. That too.
Starting point is 01:02:53 2020, 2021. Do you have anywhere to be? You want to keep yucking it up? Yeah. I'm down to get. I'm chilling. Oh, you have a stand-up show? I do.
Starting point is 01:03:00 Oh, yeah, Grace, how did that go? It went good. Oh, it went already? I saw your tweet. No no no Not the sass one She does too I did a set at the stand
Starting point is 01:03:07 Last night Oh nice Fantastic My first ever Time getting up there Let's go So first of all That takes a ton of
Starting point is 01:03:14 Fucking balls So congrats Dude I don't know Why you don't do stand up I don't I don't wanna Doesn't have the balls I'm afraid
Starting point is 01:03:20 I don't have balls He's ballless No my balls Made of steel Yeah I wasn't nervous at all I've heard And how'd it go
Starting point is 01:03:27 It went good Give me clips Somebody recorded it But I gotta find him I don't know his name How long How long was your set Five minutes
Starting point is 01:03:35 That's long That's a long time though For Saturday It's about like six or seven It is Five minutes Straight talking With nobody
Starting point is 01:03:42 I couldn't do it Nick I think you could. I think you're putting yourself down. Thanks, guys. O'Malley and I are probably the only two that could pull it off. I'm pretty sure we've had a discussion that we all think that Nick's the funniest person in the office. Yeah. Top five.
Starting point is 01:03:56 Behind my fucking back. Top five. He has. Oh, but hold on. Rudy's Instagram story is hilarious. That's true. That's true. Yes, Rudy's Instagram story is hilarious. I said that yesterday That's true. Yes, Rudy's Instagram story is hilarious.
Starting point is 01:04:05 I said that yesterday. He doesn't get it. Yeah. He's on all avenues. There was one sequence of events. I don't remember specifically. It was like you traveling or going home for Thanksgiving or something. Rudy kept on bumping into house fires.
Starting point is 01:04:17 It was so funny. Remember that? That was like three days in a row. Three separate house fires. I thought you were an arsonist. I was on the house fire beat. That was the cool one. How were you just... What was the house fire beat? Three days in a row. This separate house fires. I thought you were an arsonist. I was on the house fire beat. How were you just – What was the house fire beat?
Starting point is 01:04:28 Three days in a row. This was in New York, right? It was in New York. I was – You just kept – It started because I would sit in my room and I could see a basketball court from my old apartment. So I would commentate on the basketball. And then in the middle of doing one of that, doing that one day, a fucking five-alarm fire burst out.
Starting point is 01:04:46 Right behind the basketball. Right behind the basketball. And he just panned up. He was like, oh. Yeah. And then I was thrust into this thing where I was just covering this fire. And then the next day, there was another fucking fire on my block. That's crazy.
Starting point is 01:05:01 And you captured it. And then at some point, people were texting me, in New York, there's a lot more fires than you think. There's a lot of fires. A lot of them aren't bad. But then people would start texting me,
Starting point is 01:05:10 like, you gotta go to this fire. And then at some point, it's like, you gotta go to the fire. At some point, you just have to be a fireman. At some point,
Starting point is 01:05:15 well, at some point, it's like a very destructive, sad thing. Yeah. But that was cool. Think about it. That was a cool year.
Starting point is 01:05:21 Yeah, you were there filming, standing like this, as everybody, as like a mother lost all of her possessions. Yeah, I'm like shoving a camera in her face. That was awesome of you. Yeah, that was cool. That was a fun year.
Starting point is 01:05:35 You got really lucky with all those fires, man. I was happy for you. Also, if anybody wants to meet Rudy, just catch something on fire. He'll be right there. Oh god, a bunch of women in New York about to be setting catch something on fire. He'll be right there. I will be there. Oh, God. A bunch of women in New York are about to be setting their apartments on fire. Yeah, they are.
Starting point is 01:05:48 I'll be like, nightcrawler. Bitches are crazy like that. Those bitches. Wait, Rudy. Also, I know girls that have a fan page dedicated to you. That's incredible. What? Do you know?
Starting point is 01:05:58 Plural? I think you might. Yeah. I don't know if it's one girl or two girls. I know the Rudy Junda fan page, and people think I run it, and I do not. Yes. I know those girls. I went to Michigan State with them I run it, and I do not. Yes, I know those girls. I went to Michigan State with them. Oh, they're MSU girls.
Starting point is 01:06:08 Wait, hold on. I thought I knew who it was, and clearly I don't. Yeah. What the fuck? I fucking hate it when that happens. Well, because the page followed me, and I was like, Rudy Genda fan page. Wait, we need a Pat Tico fan page. So somebody out there.
Starting point is 01:06:24 Yes, yes, this is it. You need love. She's been lacking on you. They deleted. We need a Pat Tico fan page. So somebody out there, start that thing up. You need love. She's been lacking on you. They deleted... Oh, wait. I don't know if this is... This might be...
Starting point is 01:06:33 I don't know if this is... I can't tell if this is the one. I think this might be it. Oh, Jesus Christ, if this isn't the one. No, this is going to be so bad. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This is it.
Starting point is 01:06:42 Rudy, you being here, you existing, is sending me down a dark path. You're back on your insults? Yeah. There used to be a picture of the girl that I went to school with
Starting point is 01:06:51 photoshopped into a picture with Rudy. Okay, Popeye. And I was like, wait a second, I know that girl. You a little jealous, Pat? I am a little threatened.
Starting point is 01:07:01 Dude, I'm a tiny bit bigger than you in that picture. I'm fucked up mentally because I thought for sure i knew who it was and now i had realized i don't yeah no it's literally girls that i know and i dm'd her i was like is this you and she's like oh haha i should probably delete this picture like so people don't realize that it's me people all my friends at home think it's me that run it no it is two girls from michigan state i i won't say their names because I respect.
Starting point is 01:07:27 I want to say thank you, but at the same time, it's weird. I thought it was weird, too. I would eat that up. Yeah, I would, too. I'd be like, please keep posting. Oh, yeah. If I had a fan page. I mean, as long as it was nice towards me. You know what they were doing, though?
Starting point is 01:07:38 A fan page typically is. A hate page would be terrible. They were trolling. A mean fan page. I love them. A hate page. They were trolling me in a way that was actually sort of like an issue. They were, every time I would follow a new girl on Instagram that I was somewhat interested
Starting point is 01:07:51 in, they would immediately follow them. That's so weird. That's creepy. And I was like, at some point. That makes it look like it's you. Yes. That's definitely a girl. And so I was, exactly.
Starting point is 01:08:02 Like, I was in a tough spot. It's a girl tactic. Yeah. Yeah. It's two girls. I might start doing that to was, exactly, like I was in a tough spot. It's a girl tactic. Yeah, yeah, it's two girls. I might start doing that to you. Make a Rudy fan page and just follow girls. Just ruin your life.
Starting point is 01:08:11 I mean, in a weird way. Hey, what's up? I got locked out of my main account. It's me, Rudy. Oh, that would be, yeah, but they were trolling me well. If, like, if Brianna, like, ever made me mad, I just start posting where she is all the time. Yeah, that's a good idea. Just doxing her.
Starting point is 01:08:23 Doxing her every chance I had. Somebody commented on lowering the bar yesterday, the video, and they said, yo, Nick lives in my building. I was like, oh, no. That's creepy. Oh, fuck. You never want that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:37 Never. That's like a safety thing. Like, why do people do that? That's like crossing the line. It's never like that. It's never like that. They're no ones. They just.
Starting point is 01:08:43 But then if someone knows where that person lives. I think we have way too big of egos to think someone cares enough to do anything. Mine's just like, I don't want to be on the elevator with them. Where you live, though, is your safe place. I keep where I live dangerous. Yeah, same here. Me alone in my apartment is very dangerous.
Starting point is 01:09:07 With your ant farm? Well, yeah, I guess I'm never alone. You have an ant farm? It's on its way in. I lost my previous colony. What do you mean lost? Died.
Starting point is 01:09:15 Fell? But I decided to upgrade farms. I was going to say if it fell over, like, that's... I have had an escape in Columbus when I had my boys.
Starting point is 01:09:23 They got out. Oh, gross. Is there part of you that's sort of, like, you're sad that you lose your ants, but is there another part of you I have had an escape in Columbus when I had my boys. They got out. Is there part of you that's sort of like you're sad that you lose your ants, but is there another part of you that's proud of them for escaping? What? Oh, no. So when they escape, I'm not proud of them because it's dumb. Because if I were in like a – ants get eaten by a lot of things.
Starting point is 01:09:44 And if they're safe and I'm feeding them a carrot strand biweekly, I'd be loving it. Yeah. These guys escaped. Talking like a real. And you watch them like build tunnels and stuff. Oh, God. You watch them like build tunnels. Wait, what, Rudy?
Starting point is 01:09:53 Yeah. That's kind of cool. Yeah. It's always a big hit. Bugs are gross. I can see you owning like a snake. No, fuck no. No, no, no.
Starting point is 01:10:02 Tarantula. Yeah. Like some sort of animal. Ant farm animal aww see they're hard workers what are we looking at
Starting point is 01:10:09 I know they inspire me ants I'm like the ant at barstool go little oh it's time lapse oh it's time lapse they're moving that quick
Starting point is 01:10:19 at least you're not who said that I'm stupid but Nick at least you're not petty while they were escaping you didn't like try to burn them
Starting point is 01:10:27 or like kill them no I wished them the best of luck but I just didn't want to be an NLSer I would have stomped them oh Duke said the other day he loves killing slugs
Starting point is 01:10:35 yeah that was so weird he's like I love to watch them like burn how often does he encounter slugs yeah and then he goes
Starting point is 01:10:43 sometimes I squish him with my bare feet I'm like this is weird where do you find slugs yeah how do you find slugs? I've never seen a slug. Sometimes I squish him with my bare feet. I'm like, this is weird. Or do you see a slug? Yeah, how do you find slugs? Like, dude, what? He's like, dude, I just have to be honest about this. If you leave like a bowl of beer out, it attracts a ton of slugs.
Starting point is 01:10:56 Really? There used to be a lot of slugs like in my driveway in New Jersey. You can do that in the mountains if you like pee on a rock. A bunch of goats will come and lick the rock because they like the salt and the pee. Really? Goats? How do you know? I'm from Colorado.
Starting point is 01:11:10 Oh, wow. My dad, me and him used to climb mountains and we would pee and then goats would come. KB, I got to call you out. I walked past your phone yesterday. You were on it playing the iMessage game Battleship. Who's the honey? Who's the girl? You don't just play.
Starting point is 01:11:27 And then I said, who is that? And you said you were just practicing. Practicing Battleship? Ship placements, Kyle? Is that your way of like flirting? Who's your iMessage baby? Who's your Battleship girl? Why?
Starting point is 01:11:43 Because it's weird. TJ? Fucking creep. Fucking creep, dude. You can't even look at yourself. battleship girl weird TJ is a fucking creep Jake Malicek said you have the darkest brown eyes there's some life in those eyes we gotta get that get those fixed battleship white point battleship yeah that's the
Starting point is 01:12:04 longest way to cut pong can't even flirt in battles. Yeah, it's violent. What's a cup? Oh, we got a cup pong is when you play like beer pong, but it's on your phone. Oh Yeah, are you mad at me for calling out your battleship girl? Oh, it's battleships fun. No, it's not stupid I think it's the most fun game Jordan you good over there Yeah Were you just sleeping? No. I'm so hungry.
Starting point is 01:12:27 Oh. You can leave. Go grab your hail. Yeah, you're not a hostage. Bring it back in. This is a director's cut. Let's go 24 hours. We've talked about doing that before.
Starting point is 01:12:36 That would be so awesome. Just in shifts. That would be crazy. That would be so sick. That'd be kind of cool, actually. You guys could easily do that, if you like. But that takes a ton of,
Starting point is 01:12:43 like, Feidelberg doing that solo is insane. Oh, yeah. Did he sleep at all, or was he up the whole time? Yeah, he slept. And people were watching him You guys could easily do that. That takes a ton. Feidelberg doing that solo. Did he sleep at all? He slept. People were watching him. I was yucking it up in the chat during sleep time. That's funny. Did he take it to the restroom?
Starting point is 01:12:59 He didn't poop in 24 hours. He didn't sneeze. Did he pee though? He didn't sneeze. He had the COVID. He didn't sneeze. Fe he pee though? He peed. Okay, good. And he had the COVID. He didn't sneeze. Why couldn't he have sneezed? Fidelberg sneezes are gross. No, I think he could have sneezed,
Starting point is 01:13:10 but he didn't. Yeah, people would have had to drop shit and sneezes in to pee. Did he leave to pee? I don't know. I didn't catch a pee. I feel like Fidelberg
Starting point is 01:13:19 would be that kind of guy that would bring the camera with him if he had to pee. Yeah, he's shameless. Yeah. He is. Have you ever sneezed while you're peeing? to pee. Yeah, he's shameless. Yeah. He is. It's a great way to be. Have you ever sneezed while you're peeing?
Starting point is 01:13:27 It sucks. Yeah, and then I have to fucking clean up the fucking tile on the back wall. Because they have dicks. Yeah. I was like, wait, what?
Starting point is 01:13:34 It's like a fucking weed go. Oh, no! Be good. Wait, I fuck with this heavy action. You probably look like Zal over there. Wait, put your hands out.
Starting point is 01:13:49 What a monster. That's how you get to me. What? Yeah. This is dope. Oh, that rocks. Oh, TJ's the man now. Dude, I feel like I'm in a Chitty Bang video.
Starting point is 01:14:00 Yeah, you do. Yeah. Pretty much amazing. That rocks. Oh, my God. That, you do. Yeah. Pretty much amazing. That rocks. Oh my God. That's so funny. Damn, TJ, you've been sitting
Starting point is 01:14:09 on this the whole time? That's a feature? Damn. Or did you need me? You complained about zooming, so I zoomed in the other way. This is fucking awesome.
Starting point is 01:14:19 That is really funny. All right, anything else you guys want to add? I'm just grateful to be here I love being on the air Amalia is live with Sass Saturday That's what I was getting at
Starting point is 01:14:31 Yeah so I was hoping he'd be in this room So we could finally talk He's up in Massachusetts First time ever I've never talked to Sass either You don't talk You do talk You don't talk with Sass
Starting point is 01:14:42 You can talk to him And he just He'll give you a Maybe he's a letter guy. Should I write him a letter before the show? Yeah, you probably write him a letter. A little calligraphy. All right.
Starting point is 01:14:51 Yeah. I've, like, smiled, and he, like, gave me, like, a look. Yeah, no, so we, like... Really? Kind of be online, I guess. Well, you have only smiled at him. Yeah. Well, what was I supposed to do
Starting point is 01:15:05 hey he's only said no to me so you should rub his head too you should rub the top of his head no wait wait show Hank
Starting point is 01:15:12 show Hank Hank Hank he'll like this Hank will crack up you're gonna like this he doesn't laugh don't say anything
Starting point is 01:15:19 just Hank Hank welcome to the show look at his big ass head on the camera Hank. Hank. Welcome to the show. Fucking jersey. Look at his big ass head on the camera. No, no, no. You don't need it.
Starting point is 01:15:31 Just look at it. You like that? Have you guys done this? No. Oh. That's so sick, isn't it? Incredible. Kind of funny.
Starting point is 01:15:41 It's dope. He wanted you in here to show off his raw jersey. That is fire. God damn it. Thank you. Yeah. Buy. Kind of funny. It's dope. He wanted you in here to show off his raw jersey. That is fire. God damn it. Thank you. Yeah. Buy it off of him. Name price.
Starting point is 01:15:51 We've been running for a while now. Size it. Large. I'll give you a raw rolling tray. A raw rolling paper. I'll give you 50 bucks for it. Okay. My brother would literally love that
Starting point is 01:16:05 you can't wear that piece more than once no I'm never going to wear it again now he has to go home with his shirt off he's already taken his shirt off that's exactly what he wants no Grace he's taken his shirt off can we do my head let's see this
Starting point is 01:16:21 I can't even imagine what this is about to look like it's going to look tight it's going to look tight as hell. It's going to look sick. This is awesome. Hank looks so good with his tan. Hank looks tan as well. You do look tan.
Starting point is 01:16:30 And Hank, are you getting shredded this year? Yeah, now he's coming. Eventually, yeah. Are you in Florida? Welcome. No. Billy's giving me supplements. Welcome to the team.
Starting point is 01:16:37 Okay. Oh, TJ. Uh-oh, we're getting there. No, no. Don't move, don't move. Stay there, stay there, yeah. We've got to scale him down No, no. Don't move. Don't move. Stay there. We got to scale them down a little bit.
Starting point is 01:16:48 Crop it in. This is awesome. Yeah, isn't it? What show is this? Yak. Can't you tell? It's the regular crew. This is very normal.
Starting point is 01:16:59 Patrick, where'd your sisters go? That rocks. That rocks. They probably met some random bartender. They're probably running a month. You know what they should do? Barstool bobbleheads. Yes.
Starting point is 01:17:08 Who the fuck would buy that? Me? All of them? I don't know. Barstool fans? Yeah. That's kind of a good idea. Hank, you gotta bobble your head around.
Starting point is 01:17:15 Bobbleheads are fucking dead. No one's buying them. Nobody's buying them. They're collector's items. They are. I'd buy that. I would buy the Hank bobblehead. Yeah, there's a lot of part of my take fans that would buy a big cap bobblehead.
Starting point is 01:17:27 Yeah, part of my take is bobbleheads would sell. Yeah. Yeah. You don't think they could do a – No, they should do fat heads. I want to be on someone's fucking wall. Well, a fat head's more intense. That's like a big-ass thing on your wall.
Starting point is 01:17:39 A bobblehead's like a little collector thing you put on your desk. I'm going to pitch it. I'm pitching it. I'm pitching it. But KB wants to be worshipped. Thanks for bobbling. Well, that could be a part of the shrine. KB, if you went to a house party
Starting point is 01:17:51 and somebody had a fat head of you, would you be stoked? Would you be fucking stoked, dude? Yes, if anyone did. You guys aren't allowed to come to my house. Oh, shit. Oh, wow. Remember the cardboard cutout phase?
Starting point is 01:18:04 Did you guys ever have one of those? I had one of Louis Tomlinson from Wonderland. Taylor Lautner. I had Edward Cullen. I have Derek Jeter still in there. And I was way too old. Mace Windu is sick. You didn't even like Star Wars.
Starting point is 01:18:17 Yeah. He put a pink balloon on his mouth. He looked like he was blowing a bubble with gum. Or just blowing up a pink balloon. Mm-hmm. No, no, it's gum. Shut the fuck up. It's gum.
Starting point is 01:18:31 Patrick, you ever have a cardboard cutout? No. Sorry. I think it's like a suburban thing to do. Yeah. What do you mean by suburban? You're from the city. He's from Woodland.
Starting point is 01:18:42 You said you're from the city. He's from Sugar Land. Listen. That ain from the city. He's from Sugar Land. That ain't no city. Listen, this is not exposing Patrick no more. I've been exposed all day today. I'm not from the city, you know. I'm not even from the city he thinks I am. Oh, gosh.
Starting point is 01:18:57 Exactly. She just assumed that you were from an, I guess, urban area. I don't know what that means. He said that he was from? I don't know what that... What does that mean? He said that he was from Houston. What does that mean? I know, she said it's a suburban thing. I don't know. Am I dressed urban? Am I dressed urban?
Starting point is 01:19:15 Am I dressed urban? Not dressed urban. You dress like an explorer. Really? Yeah. Like Lewis and Clark or something? Nah, like Indiana Jones. You got like a vampire thing going. He dresses just like Lewis and Clark.
Starting point is 01:19:30 Bluess and Blark. They were a thing back then. You know, I'm taking that high five back. I fuck with it. Yeah, you got like an anime vampire thing going. Oh, you do dress like an anime. You're in an anime. Yeah, it's fire.
Starting point is 01:19:45 Like an interview with the vampire Tom Cruise yeah sexy vampire okay I'll take that yeah sexy vampire every time I look at KB I'm like
Starting point is 01:19:52 you know don't get too close I'll bite your neck oh shit you already did I did I'm sorry damn it oh god
Starting point is 01:19:59 things got nuts on that shit I felt like I left Vietnam alright yeah I'm gonna turn all of you into vampires're nuts. I felt like I left Vietnam. All right. Yeah. I'm going to turn all of you into vampires, you know? Dude, I'd love to be a vampire every single day.
Starting point is 01:20:10 You'd love to be a vampire? Hell yeah, dude. Vampires are fly as fuck. I don't want to live forever. I do not want to live forever. That's not. I'd rather be a werewolf, but I'd turn into an actual wolf, not like that scary demon wolf. I want to be a mummy.
Starting point is 01:20:23 You love mummies. You told me about this. I've always loved mummies when you die we can mummify you please yeah oh that's like we should bring that back yeah bring back mummifying yes and it doesn't matter like just do it before the casket yeah and if you're like you open casket funeral and i'm a mummy that's awesome that's the greatest final goodbye yeah literally that's like the best way to end i want to um stick a dynamite in my mouth and then my all my body parts explode and all my
Starting point is 01:20:47 friends and family that grab one piece of me and you toss it into a shark so I can swim on forever. That's cool. I like that. I've really thought about that too. Logistically, that's pretty tough. I like that. I got a couple guys that can help me out.
Starting point is 01:20:58 Yeah. Wow. That's cool. I know some people. Are we talking about dynamite here? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you going to die? I hope not.
Starting point is 01:21:05 I don't think you will. I'm not even joking. I don't think you'll die. Well, that's good. I mean, let me be like a god in like 20,000 A.D. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. No.
Starting point is 01:21:16 I mean. No. No, no, no. What the fuck, TJ? Listen. Nice. That's so tight. I'm Zafu. Zafu. No, I'm Dibs, Dibs, Dibs, D. Nice. That's so tight. I'm Zafu.
Starting point is 01:21:26 No, I'm Dibs. That's so fucking sick. Sorry, pal. Fair enough. I'm Chitty Bang. Listen, that's giving me Zah vibes right there. Jesus Christ. Love that.
Starting point is 01:21:42 I didn't make it more offensive. Listen, don't hate on my battle cry, man. That's your battle cry? Yeah. That's how you know I'm coming for you. Of a generation. All you hear is, ah! Where the fuck is he?
Starting point is 01:21:57 Everyone do your battle cry. Where's Patrick? Jordan, what's your battle cry? You need like an example. Your stomach growling? No, you guys, you don't understand what I'm trying to say. Okay, George. What's your battle cry? You need like an example. Your stomach growling? Yeah. No, you guys, you don't understand what I'm trying to say. Okay, George.
Starting point is 01:22:11 I liked that. I'm just going to start getting hangry. We're doing a marathon episode. Marathon episode. The show ends at two. We're not even live anymore. I'm just talking with you guys. What? Yeah, we went off because of Sling.
Starting point is 01:22:23 We have to end this at two. We've just been talking. That's hilarious. Is that true? No, he's lying. Sling cuts off at two. But this is still live on YouTube. Oh, that's so weird.
Starting point is 01:22:32 So now we're not sponsored, so we can say anything. Oh, word. All right, so I had a couple things I wanted to say. Oh, word. Oh, I do say word. It's terrible. I say word all the time. Everyone says word.
Starting point is 01:22:41 Yeah, I don't say word. I say word. Imagine me saying word. I could see you saying word. I feel't say word. I say word. Imagine me saying word. I could see you saying word. I feel like you do. What? Word. Word.
Starting point is 01:22:49 Sometimes you get a little... Word to your mother. Zesty and sexy. Yeah. You'll say some slang sometimes. You do. The other day, you actually said two things, and I was like, are you 18? I wanted to say something, but I was...
Starting point is 01:23:01 What kind of things? I said I was bowling on the weekend. No, he was like... He was picking back. are you trying to? Are you bowling with the bros? I do that a lot. What's the word called when people hang out? Like the kids say, they want to.
Starting point is 01:23:12 Chillin'? No. Link up? Link up. I would never say link up. Nick, you did. You go, you want to link up. Oh, he wants to link up with you?
Starting point is 01:23:20 Not me. No, I would not say I link up. Dead ass? What would you say? What would you say? Squad up? You literally go, do you want to link up? Do you guys want to No, I would not say I link up. Dead ass? What would you say? Squat up? You literally go, do you want to link up? Do you guys want to get together?
Starting point is 01:23:28 Maybe we could all get together. Have a soiree. So you tried to think of two different things, but you just said get together twice. Dude, I hate that you pick up on stuff like that.
Starting point is 01:23:36 It picks up on everything. Well, they were right in sequence. Yeah, it picks up on everything. As soon as you said that, I knew he was going to cook your ass. And then cook she was, Rudy. Squash thing. And cook she was. Oh, you're talking to Owen. We squashed his beef like squash. I fucking, I knew he was going to cook your ass. And cook she was, Rudy. Squash thing.
Starting point is 01:23:46 Oh, you're talking to Owen. We squashed his beef like squash. I fucked with that. You're going to crush Saturday. With my dirty accent. Thank you. I'm so bummed I didn't get a ticket. Same.
Starting point is 01:23:58 I know. I am just walking in with sass. Somebody take Owen's ticket. Who's Oprah? Oh, Owen has... Owenen he's kind of like oprah owen has has covet oh but he might be done with his five days that sucks is he giving his ticket away i don't yeah can i just be your groupie grace yeah i thought i could but um the kid the other kid was putting it on with him like was like nah like there might be oh he did that to
Starting point is 01:24:23 us last time really yeah and then he asked if he could go on friday night pints i was like, nah. Oh, he did that to us last time. Really? Yeah. And then he asked if he could go on Friday Night Pints. I was like, dude, what? He's like, while you're waiting out here. I do like Jared, though. Shut up, Jared. No, it wasn't Jared. He's cool. No, it wasn't Jared then. Maybe I'll try to get a Oprah's ticket then. Oprah's ticket. He told me last night
Starting point is 01:24:40 there might be tickets at the door. Jordan, is your food sitting up there? Yes. Go get it. No. Eat it here. She's going to have FOMO. Once I leave, I can't come back. It's 10 feet. I'm hungry right now.
Starting point is 01:24:51 Did you get soup? Did you get soup? Go get it. That's going to be cold as hell. I'm not eating you here. Go get it. No. My Dostoros is up there.
Starting point is 01:24:59 Are you a grocery? Are we doing a marathon show? No. All right. We'll go to three. Truth. No. It's almost 2.30. Jordan, marathon show? No. Alright, we'll go to three. No. It's almost 2.30. Jordan, just leave.
Starting point is 01:25:09 No. What kind of soup did you get? Who's eyeing us up from the waiting room? Hell yeah. No, not Enrique Cam. I'm getting my door closed. Patrick. Him.
Starting point is 01:25:18 Go, Patrick. Oh, fuck. That's kind of awkward. He's scary. Oh, he knows you got busted. You got busted. Wandering eyes. I can't even. I can't tell. Who is that? He does not fuck with it. It's scary. Oh, he knows you got busted. You got busted. Wandering eyes. I can't even.
Starting point is 01:25:27 I can't tell. Who is that? He does not fuck with it. He's not smiling. He's not smiling. You can't tell. Who is that? What did you say, KB?
Starting point is 01:25:33 Chill. What did you say, TJ? He's going to think that's us somehow. You're making me nervous. What did you say, KB? You wasn't going to say something stupid, was you? Yeah, probably. Yeah, I dreamt about you last night.
Starting point is 01:25:45 Listen, if you dreamt about what I actually did last night, then you didn't know. You were playing dice with two Roman soldiers and a bunch of Irish guys. Do you have dreams about your coworkers? No. I do frequently. I had a dream that Kenan Thompson tried to hook up with me
Starting point is 01:26:02 and I was on a member of SNL. Oh, sick. Because Kenan Thompson was in the office. When? That would have been a wet dream for me. When? Like a week before a break. What?
Starting point is 01:26:11 He came on Call Him Poppy. Kenan? Yep, yep. And then I had a dream about him in the night. Poor Keel. Yeah. I do all the time. What happened to Keel?
Starting point is 01:26:22 Kenan. Kel? Keel? I think he's fine. Kel's? Keenan. Kel. Keel. Keenan and Kel. I think he's fine. Kel's fine. He's chilling. Keel.
Starting point is 01:26:29 What are we saying? What's he saying? Jordan, get your food away from the mic, please. Food away from the mic, Jordan. Jordan, your bag is rubbing up against the microphone. It's making a lot of noise. It's annoying. Here, I'm sorry.
Starting point is 01:26:40 No, go ahead. Eat your soup. Can we turn on a slurp cam? You can have your soup and eat it. Oh, there's Kel. Go ahead. Well, let's just get the first? You can have your soup and eat it. Oh, there's Kel. Go ahead. Let's just get the first bite, then we'll let you eat. Soup cam.
Starting point is 01:26:48 Is that how you get the plastic off the top of the other end of the spoon? Yeah. I just pick and pick and pick. That's why I'm a girl and you're a boy. It is soup season. That's why? Yeah. What type of soup is that?
Starting point is 01:27:01 Is that like clam chowder? I love the way you flirt, Patrick. Hey, listen. I am for sure going to be using that. He shows you care. Does that work? She hasn't even opened it yet. What is that, clam chowder?
Starting point is 01:27:15 Jordan, you can slurp. I mean, on cam. Patrick, no. Patrick says it. I'm on your side. I'm on your side. Thank you. Why are you making it weird
Starting point is 01:27:25 it says slurp cam it's all good it says slurp cam you gotta get more loose Patrick yeah like you just bully everyone what's your guys favorite soup favorite soup
Starting point is 01:27:35 lobster pins well I know yours French onion worldwide yeah French onion worldwide what's your favorite soup favorite soup I'm from Boston I have to say clam chowder
Starting point is 01:27:43 okay I like clam chowder I'm shocked it took us an hour and a half to get to favorite soup. The office won't shut the fuck up about soup. Yeah, there's a weird soup vibe going on here. Everyone's talking about soup.
Starting point is 01:27:57 I'm a big soup girl. I like soup. It's chili soup. I've never talked about soup so much in my life. Sure, I guess. Anything with a broth, I consider soup. Ice cream? No, ice cream's about soup so much in my life. Sure, I guess. Anything with a broth, I consider soup. Oh, that smells sweet. Ice cream? Oh, TJ.
Starting point is 01:28:07 No, ice cream's not soup because it's not broth. You just kind of look like my mom. Patrick, did you ever have soup, or is that more of a suburban thing? Never had soup, you know. I was too poor for soup. Too poor for soup? Yeah, too poor for soup. That's just, oh, God. I know, it's crazy. What did you have. I was too poor for soup. Too poor for soup? Yeah, too poor for soup. That's just, oh, God.
Starting point is 01:28:25 I know, it's crazy. What did you have? I couldn't even get crackers. You got one now. Oh. The bass keys are running. Yeah. Nah.
Starting point is 01:28:39 Slurp cam. Oh, you guys have to slurp. You gotta slurp something. Slurp each other. I mean, you know. Oh, my God. Patrick.urp. Yeah, slurp something. Slurp each other. I mean, you know. Patrick. Man.
Starting point is 01:28:49 Man, that could have. Oh, he was just a poor delivery man. I thought he was in here. No, I feel bad. Yeah, TJ, you were fucking mocking him. I think I'm going to get Chipotle, Rudy. That looks really good. Everything he does. Everything he fucking does.
Starting point is 01:29:04 Jesus Christ. That makes you sick, Nick. One of the most populous average restaurants ever. Jesus. I hate all women. Nice. I haven't had Chipotle
Starting point is 01:29:19 in like two months. This is Dos Toros. Oh, it is? Oh, well, I'm going to get Chipotle. So then I take it back. It doesn't look good. All right. Oh, it is? I'm going to get Chipotle. Then I take it back. It doesn't look good. Feel better, Nick? A little baby? I feel a lot better.
Starting point is 01:29:31 You little baby incel? I'm going to be an incel in 2022. I'll join you, bro. I'll be an incel. Now you're a vol-cel, brother. Voluntary celibate. That's like what Justin Bieber did. He was fucking. No, he went celibate I'm involuntary that's like what Justin Bieber did he was fucking no he went celibate
Starting point is 01:29:47 for like no how you know how you know Patrick I know because Justin Bieber came out
Starting point is 01:29:53 and he said it and that's why him and Hailey Bieber got married because he was celibate and they wanted to have sex oh wow he did go
Starting point is 01:29:59 oh yeah he rebranded as a god guy yes before his last album and he went celibate for like 6 months or 3 months you still don't know 3 months celibate I like six months or three months. You still don't know.
Starting point is 01:30:06 You believe him? I believe him. What? That is just normal. If I have sex once every three months, that's a hot streak, baby. That is a streak. Well, he was probably having sex every day. Every day.
Starting point is 01:30:17 With different people. Yeah, and then he found God, and he was a virgin. You really believe that? I got that equinox dick What's that Mika Everybody rides it The frequency In which I fuck
Starting point is 01:30:29 Is that of an equinox Yeah that's right The gym I give her the Solstice strokes Solstice That's a blackout Oh an equinox like
Starting point is 01:30:41 Solstice strokes I thought you meant Equinox the gym Me too. I'm like, so you're an expensive... Your mind goes... Members only. No, KB goes to Planet Fitness.
Starting point is 01:30:53 Is that where you were going today? No. I've been trying to find out where KB was going today. I was walking to work. I saw KB, and I was like, where are you going? He looks at me and just goes, don't worry about it. And he kept walking. So on and off camera, he's bizarre.
Starting point is 01:31:11 No, yeah. I've never seen you in real life. We went to the Louis the Child concert together. No, we didn't. I was there, but I didn't go with you guys. I was watching. He said he had his eyes on you. You know, I've never been in KB's apartment?
Starting point is 01:31:26 Never seen him. Oh, really? Yeah. That's surprising. He's never invited me. Where do you live? Why would I? What the fuck?
Starting point is 01:31:31 I shouldn't say where do you live, but what area? I don't chill at your apartment. You've been multiple times. Do you guys hang out? It would be fun. Yeah. But where? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:42 If you're not at each other's apartments. What do you mean? That's so true. Where? You come to my apartment every so often. The park? So Nick, why you never go to his place? He probably has a fat head of Nick.
Starting point is 01:31:51 Maybe. True. Damn, you don't want him to see it, huh? No, I have the Nepal flag. It just looks kind of stupid. So does KB go to your apartment? Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:03 Well, because he wants to see your ant farm. These two guys. And he likes my decor. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, because he wants to see your ant farm. These two guys. And he likes my decor. Yeah. I got decor out the wazoo. Decor? Really? That's a sentence I say all the time.
Starting point is 01:32:12 Decor? Decor? Out the wazoo. Yo, baby girl, what kind of soup is that? I got soup out the wazoo. Oh, do you have a waffles? Yes, I do. Yeah, it is whack.
Starting point is 01:32:19 I'm glad you never invited me. It's not whack. Oh, I don't like that. Oh, they cut it that way? Thank you. What about it? Ladies, is that kind of a turn off? Yeah. It's not whack. Oh, I don't like that. Oh, they call it that way? Thank you. What about it? Ladies, is that kind of a turn off? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:32:28 It's not a literal red flag. It's a double red flag. It's a literal red flag, not a metaphor. It kind of like gives me a pit in my stomach. Why? Jordan, you walk into
Starting point is 01:32:35 a dude's apartment and you see that monstrosity. It's the only flag in the world that's not four sides. Yeah, I don't like that. What about Ohio? Yeah, they only... Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 01:32:45 Wait, Ohio's flag doesn't have four sides? How do you know this? What are they up to? Come on. Wait, can you pull up Ohio's flag? It's a pennant. Flags in general are a bad idea, dude. You can't go flags.
Starting point is 01:32:55 Do that in your den or not in the main area. I have a flag in my main area. I'm doing it for myself. That looks like Puerto Rico. I was just about to say that. Why does Ohio think that they're special? Because they need a dub. Well, state flags are god awful.
Starting point is 01:33:10 That's not even a bottom 20. Isn't Colorado's flag like famous? That is a top. Colorado's is fire. Colorado's is numero uno. Arizona is swaggy. New Mexico is good. New Mexico is great.
Starting point is 01:33:20 Texas. I don't mind California. Do you guys know the state fish of Hawaii? Texas is that. Oh, uma, uma, nuka, nuka, apua. Yes. Damn, I thought I had it. Texas I don't mind California Do you guys know The state fish of Hawaii Texas is that Oh Uma Nuka Nuka Apua Yes Damn I thought I had it I only know that
Starting point is 01:33:29 Because of High School Musical 3 Yes Really Yeah thanks TJ I knew it because of Forgetting Sarah Marshall Good pool TJ Thanks man
Starting point is 01:33:37 That's our demographics Yeah that's right That's where you and me differ Yeah a lot of these are whack Arizona's is fantastic. New Mexico's is nice. Yeah, New Mexico is cool. Wait, is Colorado the bear?
Starting point is 01:33:49 I like Colorado's. I like California. No, California's the bear. What the fuck is California? Alaska's got a little zipper on there. What is Mississippi doing? I call KB that every time he puts in a zin. Mississippi.
Starting point is 01:33:58 They just changed the Mississippi flag last year. Mississippi is good now. It's got a bug on it. It doesn't have the confetti. Maryland is too complex. Oh's got a bug on it. Maryland is too complex. Oh, rest in peace your mentions. They love their flag. Wait, what's the British one?
Starting point is 01:34:10 What does Minnesota look like? The British one is Hawaii, I think. Really? Why? Which one's just got George Washington on it? Hawaii. Washington. A bet, bet, bet.
Starting point is 01:34:21 Oh. Wow. I feel like Hawaii's does not fit Hawaii at all. It's very like... It doesn't. It's like Rhode Island. You would take a bite. There should be a palm tree on there.
Starting point is 01:34:31 Put on a flag before you take a bite. No, I said I like... I like Colorado and California flags. That was the funniest thing that happened this episode. That's so sick That is sick Never wanted to be a physical comedian I get the sandwich every day because of Nick I said the same thing
Starting point is 01:34:52 Is that the balsamic chicken? Yep Yeah, it's good He recommended it one day and I never could go back It's good Tastes like chicken salad kind of That's what it is Is it really good?
Starting point is 01:35:00 So good It tastes exactly like chicken salad Gee, how often did you like play tennis growing up as a kid? Never played tennis I did tennis camp when I was young I don't have a tennis court in my backyard Side yard, I'm sorry I played basketball
Starting point is 01:35:14 I'll cross you up, Patrick You can't cross You cannot hoop You look like a guy that can't hoop You're playing Your build can't hoop. You truly can't. I got handles.
Starting point is 01:35:28 Patrick. I got handles. What was your sport? Basketball, football, track. I was a typical jock. Fair. Yeah, exactly. For a star athlete?
Starting point is 01:35:38 I wasn't good at anything. I was a bong. My dad was so disappointed. All he wanted was a boy. Do you remember when I was in the finals at the Michigan State Open? Yeah, of course. You weren't there at the time, were you? No, yeah, I was.
Starting point is 01:35:49 It was crazy. The first time or the second time? I know that guy from Twitter. Shut the fuck up. The first time or the second time? Second. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:35:56 I was like, that guy's on Twitter. I know him. KB, don't have that. Don't have that, huh? He always does. He always fucking does. He always will. Well, what happens if you don't get it done
Starting point is 01:36:06 he I don't know I like the end of the world I for yeah I make their way into their close friend it's hard to justify that move no no no no no miss meeting Meeting. What are you thinking? I was working with a girl. Oh, fair. What does that mean? Making less. Oh, my God. Oh, damn. For the same effort. Oh, man. So you're a working girl?
Starting point is 01:36:34 No. It was a meeting for work. It was with Beeman, actually. I was in a meeting with Beeman. Why'd you say actually? And actually. Oh, KB, go have that. That is something I would assume you would meet with. That's not like a surprise.
Starting point is 01:36:45 Well, I don't think everyone knows that I meet with Beeman. Beeman and I are close personal friends. Are you guys close friends? Yeah. On your close friends?
Starting point is 01:36:53 I don't have a close friend story. Neither do I. It is for Erica. You would go to CEO stuff. Yeah, everyone who doesn't know work like a girl
Starting point is 01:37:00 is fired. It's literally our CEOs. If you don't know work like a girl, you hate women. Nick. Yeah. Guilty. I know what work like a girl is fired. It's literally our CEOs. If you don't know work like a girl, you hate women. Guilty. Do you know what work like a girl is? It's like an all-female LinkedIn.
Starting point is 01:37:12 It's like the beat the streets for girls trying to be entrepreneurs. It's honestly not a bad way to describe it. Literally is an all-female LinkedIn. She just said no. It's on LinkedIn. It's on Instagram. And the good fellas are in on it.
Starting point is 01:37:26 It's like, here's how to have girl boss... The good guys. Yeah, the good guys are in on it, but... Here's how to girl boss your way to a CEO job. Yeah. It's just all about... It's all about girl bossing. Girl bossing.
Starting point is 01:37:38 Clench your toes. Oh, no. Wait, don't tell him I have black nail polish on right now on my toes. I know he doesn't like that Who? Jerry Kick ass jobs kick ass people
Starting point is 01:37:49 What about Jerry and toes? There's also an Instagram follow work like a girl on Instagram You don't know about this? Oh god I don't want to know that Yeah we'll do that So if you're a man
Starting point is 01:37:57 you can't get on this? No you can Oh really? Men can also work like girls Rudy What is the dating app for like famous people? Raya
Starting point is 01:38:04 Were you on that Rudy? I got fucking waitlisted I've been waitlisted for like three years You're still? Men can also work like girls, Rudy. What is the dating app for famous people? Raya. Were you on that, Rudy? I got fucking waitlisted. I've been waitlisted for three years. You're still? Same. What is this? Maybe we can openly ask. Raya?
Starting point is 01:38:14 It's a dating app for influencers. Whitney Cummings said she was going to get me on Raya, and she couldn't. What the fuck? She don't have a pool like that. That's pretty crazy. I don't get why a guy would want to be on that. That would just make things harder than they already are. Yeah, explain that to me.
Starting point is 01:38:30 Yeah, literally, because he doesn't get it being hard. Baby's just jealous. It's just a bunch of girls who have much higher standards. Yeah. I don't know what it's like in there. I couldn't get in. Okay. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:38:44 It has to be a bunch of D, well, according to not Jordan. It's a bunch of Jordan's A-listers. I guess the way it works is it's a very powerful app. If you talk about it or anything, you get taken off. It'll connect to your contacts
Starting point is 01:39:00 and only set you up with people who are mutual and in the same social status as you because they take your social media. How do you measure social status? It's like fucked up. This is fucked up. Black mirror?
Starting point is 01:39:13 It is kind of fucked up. It's kind of black mirror. So you only get matched to people who are in your social status. When you say social status, you mean just social media, which does not correlate. If you're an A-list celebrity compared to like a C-list celebrity. Career, money. Yeah, money.
Starting point is 01:39:29 Money? But does it account for dating history? Because I used to hook up with Katherine Heigl. I remember that. In her 27 Dresses era? No, a little after. No, a little after, Nick. A little after 27 Dresses.
Starting point is 01:39:42 Yes. Is this real? Is this real? No, you fucked Kim. No. Kim recently. Who? real? Is this real? No, you fucked Semi recently. Who? Like, Firefly Lane recently? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:39:51 Jeez, guys. This was... Was she in Knocked Up? I can't tell if this is real or not. So far after. Even, like, her... Hold on. Stop.
Starting point is 01:39:59 Was she... I mean, Katherine Heigl's pretty. Is she not? Was she a cast member on Grey's Anatomy when you... God! God! No, this was way after anything.
Starting point is 01:40:07 Alright, alright, alright. When did you move to New York? When did I move to New York? Two years ago. I feel like Nick's fine because he doesn't share any personal information. Catherine Heigl is... I've heard she's kind of a bitch on set. That's why I ended things.
Starting point is 01:40:24 She's blackball in bed too. Find out the most recent Katherine Heigl project. Firefly Lane. I never watched. I'm a big Katherine Heigl fan. My grandma said I look like her. All it took is one major heartbreak for her.
Starting point is 01:40:41 I don't see it. My grandma also said that Fran looks like Beyonce. I see that. Definitely see that one. grandma also said that Fran looks like Beyonce. I see that. Yeah. Definitely see that one. Wait, someone said Fran looks like Beyonce? My grandma.
Starting point is 01:40:50 Oh, that's cool as fuck. Yeah. That's tight. I like that. My grandma thinks I'm a professional. Yeah, let it out. What you got to say?
Starting point is 01:40:56 No, I'm just listening to the dreams. That's all. We're not talking about dreams anymore. What? Dreams. Listen, man.
Starting point is 01:41:05 All right. Does everyone want to plug their socials? And we'll go across the street and get a shepherd's pie. Let's do that. I'm in on that. Everyone go follow Rudy Junda fan page. Oh, yeah. Yeah, Rudy Junda fan page.
Starting point is 01:41:14 Follow those numbers. Follow French Onion Worldwide. Oh, my God. Oh, we've never brought that up. Yeah. She's been running a French Onion fan page. Oh, Carl nabbed off you? Yeah, I started
Starting point is 01:41:26 I started doing it before Carl. I'll say that. God damn. French Onion underscore worldwide. We have gone worldwide. We've reviewed in Italy
Starting point is 01:41:34 and France. Yeah, we go there enough. And yeah, we review French Onion soup mostly in the tri-state area. I didn't know this was a thing. Nice.
Starting point is 01:41:42 French Onion underscore worldwide. Is that you? Nice. We were on a podcast. Nice. Ben Chanyan underscore worldwide. Yep. Is that you? Nice. We were on a podcast. Yep. That's our highlight reel. I'm in on this.
Starting point is 01:41:51 There I am. There I am again. There I am again. All right. And then there are the bloopers. What are the bloopers? And we also sell merch. We also sell merch.
Starting point is 01:41:56 We sell merch. What? Soup season merch. Soup season merch. What did you say? What's the bloopers section of this? It's like when we fuck up. But what?
Starting point is 01:42:05 The reviews. Because we record ourselves. Oh, like when we fuck up. What? The reviews. Oh, they gave me a fork. We record ourselves talking. How am I going to eat this? God damn it, this is a burrito. This isn't soup at all. This was two days ago, so this is a pretty active page. Nailed it. Okay so it's a team
Starting point is 01:42:33 Yeah, so it's me, my friend Krista And then our two guy friends That's my dad French onion worldwide No, that's at a restaurant That's Mr. Mariano He is our biggest supporter And you have merch Is this in like a private French onion worldwide No that's at a restaurant That's Mr. Mariano Yep He is our biggest supporter
Starting point is 01:42:47 And you have merch And we have merch Okay You guys are the new tacos and titties Oh I need that Soup season Oh yeah you guys are the new tacos and titties We'll hype you up like
Starting point is 01:42:55 You're that Oh gimme gimme I can get you one Nick if you want it Yeah What don't you get About gimme gimme Yeah Yep
Starting point is 01:43:03 What does that mean How do you Nicky said gimme gimme Yeah What don't you get about Gimme Gimme? Yeah. Boy, I'm less good at that than you. How do you... Nikki said Gimme Gimme. Yeah. It means Nikki won. It's super fun. And yeah. If anyone ever needs French onion soup recommendations, I'm your girl.
Starting point is 01:43:17 We had a good one the other day. French onion soup makes me burp. I can't eat onions. And I can appreciate that. Thank you. Thank you. You know, it started kind of as just a a joke, and then it became like a very real thing.
Starting point is 01:43:28 A lot of stories up there. A lot of highlights. Lots of highlights. People ask us. And parallel thinking, do not tweet at Carl or reply to him saying that he stole the idea. Don't come for me. Do not do that. He didn't steal it from me.
Starting point is 01:43:42 Do not do that. We did not know each other. He still has no idea who I am don't do that he wouldn't it wouldn't offend him it wouldn't snap or anything but to be clear I honestly think Josh has already tweeted at him and been like oh Gia's trying to come for your
Starting point is 01:43:59 brand whatever and I don't even think Josh tweets everything and anything so I support Carl and I don't even think Josh treats everything and anything. Yeah. So, I support Carl and I hope he supports me. Yeah. But yeah, Friendship Worldwide. Friendship Worldwide.
Starting point is 01:44:10 Shout out. So, one more thing before we sign off. You had a bunch of story highlights. Kyle, do you have any?
Starting point is 01:44:17 Hmm. No. Yeah, I need to start. I think that might be the highlight. That could be my move. That's how Michael Che posts.
Starting point is 01:44:23 Like, only on his story. You guys ever? That's what I do. Yeah, KB hasn't posted. When was your last post, Kyle? But you can archive them. KB's last post was 2015.
Starting point is 01:44:33 That is insane, KB. That's when I was born. KB, I want to know what happened after that picture. Like, did you see that person? I'm not quite sure. I know what's happening during this picture. I don't remember, dude. Kind of looks like Patrick's night last night.
Starting point is 01:44:47 Wait, Photoshop, put Patrick's head on top of that right now. Put Patrick's head on top of that right now. Hurry, TJ. Don't do that. Don't do that. Someone's commenting on all of the pictures, TJ. They're just saying TJ? Yeah. So TJ's the most popular guy on the Yak
Starting point is 01:45:07 Not a joke That's not surprising I know TJ's so nice I don't think I've ever officially met TJ TJ Me either Nice to meet ya
Starting point is 01:45:15 Hi TJ I saw TJ in the elevator He said yo He's like Oz Oh are you new here? He's Oz He's Oz in Wizard of Oz The love for TJ is unbelievable.
Starting point is 01:45:25 TJ, that clip of the Rutgers game was iconic. Unless you're Jake Malasek. He just doesn't like you for no reason. I don't know why you guys called Jake a sweet little boy on the act. He's not that kind. He is the last person I would be calling a sweet little boy. I feel bamboozled. Is he a foul little boy?
Starting point is 01:45:40 He's a foul little boy. He's a mean little boy. He's a meanie. He's gotten nicer since he started, like since we all met him in June. In June and July, he was a foul little boy he's a mean little boy he's meaning he's gotten nicer since he started like since we all met him in june yeah in june and july mean he was a little beast sassy yeah i wouldn't say he's mean he's just sassy he also refuses to be yeah he also refuses to be like seen in public with us i'll talk to him i think that kind of hurt. I mean, it's not like... I mean, we have our own good times anyway. Yeah. No, but...
Starting point is 01:46:08 Oh, God. What was that? I don't know. What was that? That's a good talk. But he's gotten a lot better, I will say. He's gotten a lot better. You want this?
Starting point is 01:46:16 This is one of my many talents. I'm so good at it. Oh, man. I like to dance and shake and dance and shake. Wait, can you do voices? A couple. I love when people can do voices. I'm kind of suddenly doing a voice.
Starting point is 01:46:28 No, but can you do a lot of them? I do Irish pretty good because I am a little inbreded with it, so I have all the Irish qualities that I need. You guys are so great. Sometimes it goes Scottish, though. It's like tricky. Yeah, I noticed that. I could listen to people do voices.
Starting point is 01:46:43 She did. I love it. You sounded like Sam from Sex and the City when you were talking. I just love it. Samantha. Why would I want Patrick to be KB? That looks like your chest. That looks real as hell.
Starting point is 01:46:56 It looks real as hell. DJ, how did this get? Did anybody else think he was going to put him on KB? I want to put him on the only other person. Wait, wait. Is that person? He is on KB. I wanted him on the body. That's not how you do it. That's how you're going to put him on KB? I wanted to put him on the only other bad person in the picture. He is on KB. I wanted him on the body.
Starting point is 01:47:07 That's not how you do it. That's how you're going to lose it. He's looking at Tommy. Jordan, you better tell him how to love you. Why does this look so natural? It looks so natural. Why does that look so natural? That is jarring.
Starting point is 01:47:21 This looks like the edited photo. Yeah, that looks like the OG. That's the Rothman. Talk your shit, twin. Hey, I speak to it. They call me the ass whisperer. Yeah? What?
Starting point is 01:47:36 Patrick. That's why his ass hurts. Oh, damn. He'd just be whispering on the phone. I'd be blowing. Blowing? There you go. You always got to take it off.
Starting point is 01:47:49 Patrick, you're the one that started it. You said I be blowing. You got to keep it cool. The ass whisperer. You got to blow on it and keep it cool. Hey, bud. No matter what. We care about you.
Starting point is 01:48:04 A careless whisper thank you that's why I like you William Wallace I gotta riddle it that's an Irish person Braveheart someone called me
Starting point is 01:48:14 a mick the other day yeah is that a slur that is a slur but I can say it I'm down with it that's the one I get is it like an Irish slur yeah
Starting point is 01:48:22 do they have those it's like the G word for Italians I can't say that I don't Do they have those? It's like the G word for Italians. I can't say that one. I don't know what the G word is. What is the G word? I'm Italian. I don't even know it.
Starting point is 01:48:31 What's the G word? No, I'm very PC. Guido? Guinea. Oh. Guinea. Oh, yeah. I don't know that.
Starting point is 01:48:35 You fucking guinea. So you went from saying the G word to fucking guinea. What's the thing that Chris Cuomo got called and he got pissed off? That was my favorite one. Fredo. Fredo. Fredo. Fredo. I'm not fucking Fredo. I am not. What's the thing that Chris Cuomo got called and he got pissed off? That was my favorite one. Fredo. Fredo. Fredo. I'm not fucking Fredo.
Starting point is 01:48:48 I am not. What's everyone's favorite slogan? Fredo. You guys have seen me off air. You know my favorite. Favorite curse word? Swear. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:48:58 I don't know yours. All right. I've actually never seen you. All right. We're almost at three o'clock. Yeah, we're almost at three. Let's call it. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 01:49:04 We might as well do it. Damn. 10 minutes left. Might as well. That's crazy. Two-hour yak. I think every Friday you should do like a lunch. Friday vibes.
Starting point is 01:49:14 New Friday vibes. New Friday vibes. I'm going to the show next week. I'm so excited. Me too. We're all going together. Where is it? What show?
Starting point is 01:49:20 Oh, the yak show? The stand. Which is a thing, I guess. Has that been promoted at all? It was tweeted once on the yak. It sold out. Why would we promote it? Only the diehard know.
Starting point is 01:49:31 Only O'Malley and I knew about it. I knew about it, too. That's your natural habit. I got to have it, too, baby. Let's go. KB should be on the other side. That's all you. KB, you get the front.
Starting point is 01:49:42 I get the back. Can we pull up a picture on KB's Instagram the first time he had Molly? Hey, put KB's face on the other face. It, that's all you. KB, you get the front. I get the back. Can we pull up a picture on KB's Instagram the first time he had Molly? Hey, put KB's face on the other face. It was a high school prom. You took Molly at high school prom? KB can kiss it together. But the thing is, nobody could tell. Nobody knew.
Starting point is 01:49:59 That is so funny. That's my favorite picture. That's awesome. That went hard at the dances. That looks like a photo from Dayland. That's so funny. It's my favorite picture. That's awesome. That went hard at the dances. That looks like a photo from Daylight NBC. Your shirt's so purple. That shirt was periwinkle at the beginning of the night. Dude, your internal body temperature is 180.
Starting point is 01:50:18 No, I was not high. You look like you're possessed. No, that was honestly a joke. That's dangerous. You look like you're possessed. I am never like that. How old were you in that was honestly a joke. That is a definite lie. That's dangerous. You look like you're possessed. I am definitely one of like that. How old were you in that picture? I was 17.
Starting point is 01:50:29 I was not. Quaaludes. Wolf of Wall Street. I honestly wasn't. That's the most high picture of all time. I wasn't even drunk. No, I swear to God. You look like you're on PCP, dude.
Starting point is 01:50:38 It was a different time when you were in school. What song was this, Kyle? Yeah, Sandstorm. Welcome to the jungle. Thanks, TJ. Oh, wow. That's what I picture. It was a joke
Starting point is 01:50:49 because it was like from Kenny. He's spouting down. He did the same thing. That show's awesome. What'd you post on your story, KP? Oh, that's funny.
Starting point is 01:50:57 What do you mean? What do I have? I think YouTube. You got a live story? You got a story? Oh, yeah. But I post. I post some stuff.
Starting point is 01:51:03 Yeah. Always posting. Always posting. All right. If you're not posting. Yeah, we're done. post. I post some stuff. Yeah. Always posting. Always posting. All right. If you're not posting. Yeah, we're done. Yeah. You guys got to plug everything, starting with Gia.
Starting point is 01:51:12 Only fans. My Instagram is Gia.Mariano. My Twitter is Giamariano5. Great. Pat. King Pat. I know. All right.
Starting point is 01:51:21 Just making sure. I never forget. Jester. Goddamn. Rudy. Rudy. No, you don Just making sure. I never forget. Jester. God damn. Rudy, no, you don't need it. Don't need it. So I'm Patrick Tico, P-A-T-R-I-C-T-O-K-O. You have a little squiggle, huh?
Starting point is 01:51:34 A little squiggle. Let me see. On squiggle. Yeah, a little tilde. This will be another 20 minutes. I mean, what are you trying to say? Sorry. Instagram is Patrick underscore the great.
Starting point is 01:51:44 Like Patrick. Patrick with a C. Patrick with a C. Okay, Instagram is Patrick underscore the great, like Patrick. Patrick with a C. Patrick with a C. No K. We don't do no damn Ks over here. Patrick P as in Patrick. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:53 KB. Hold on, hold on. I told somebody somebody wanted me to call myself Patty Ice. What do you think about that? No, that's the worst shit ever.
Starting point is 01:52:01 Somebody tweeted at me and I was like, what the fuck is Patty Ice? I knew a kid in college that went by Patty Ice. Every guy named Pat or Matt is like, I'm Matty Ice. That's what I thought too.
Starting point is 01:52:11 He was the kind of kid that was so pale that he would get red. I have rosacea. I get tan as hell. You got good color, KB. Bix and Abathis All my handles are all different Let's go Instagram No, you gotta go Twitter
Starting point is 01:52:33 No, dude, I want 10k by the end of the month 10k on this? You heard that Get O'Malley to 10k Let's get it right now Let's get it right now O'Malley to 10k That's my goal
Starting point is 01:52:41 Click it, TJ Oh, you're already following Oh, word, thanks guys Let it, TJ. Oh, you're already following. Oh, word. Thanks, guys. Let's hit a refresh. Oh, fuck that. She better be at five.
Starting point is 01:52:52 I mean, are those people still watching this? Nope, one. You got one. I lost. 69. Hell yeah. Hey, that's enough. Jordan?
Starting point is 01:53:03 Instagram, Jordan Woodruff, TikTok, Jordan Woodknow. And I want to get to 30K on Instagram so I can share my skincare routine with the world. Wait, what does that mean? Wait, what do you mean? Why do you have to get 30K or something? She said it's gold. Oh, you guys don't follow me. I see. You don't watch my content.
Starting point is 01:53:12 It's fine. You post 7,000 stories a day. And you watch every single one. Yeah, you do. Yeah. What? Why do you need 30K? Oh, it's just like a running joke that like on my tiktok i couldn't
Starting point is 01:53:26 hit a certain number so i lowered it and then i kept lowering it and then finally i was like fine if you guys give me a 30k on instagram i'll share my skincare just like an inside joke with okay got it we're on the inside now uh mad dog uh my instagram is at madeline conroy my twitter is at mad conroy nine fuck you Alright, that was the Yak. Thanks for having us on. Good time. Triple crown. Corn dogs.
Starting point is 01:53:50 Corn dogs and beer. Have a good weekend. on TikTok. Da midget zimbo TikTok. That's right. Follow TJ too. Viva! Viva! It's the act. Yeah, it's time to talk shop and do a Yankee stop. It's the act.
Starting point is 01:54:19 It's the act. We'll see you next time. Thank you.

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