The Yak - The Stella Blue Half-Court Contest Ends with a BANG | The Yak 11-8-23

Episode Date: November 8, 2023

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, DJ, pull that up. Whoa. It's the act. We're back. And my guy, Ronan, is here. Wow. Smiling ear to ear.
Starting point is 00:00:39 Thank you, guys. Don't look at the logo. I'm so excited to be here. Oh, what the fuck Don't look Don't look Don't look Don't look Hey
Starting point is 00:00:48 Shit The quickness It's alright But we're in transition period Because Mook and Titus Have not been at it Yeah wow We're not
Starting point is 00:00:55 No Yeah Yeah That's some bullshit The Co's Co Yeah People's Co Where are you guys
Starting point is 00:00:59 Going to go on the logo I don't I'm Me personally I'm not taking it for granted that i am ever going to be on the logo yeah there's still work to be done day by day yeah yeah that is very we'll have to haze you it was very funny that when i pissed my pants i i go change i go to the bathroom change my pants and i walk out and i dan just texted the yak group he added me and he just
Starting point is 00:01:21 he said one of us yeah It was literally that fast. It's like in gangs when you have to kill someone to become a member. You just got to piss your pants. I was coming on this show for like two months, and the second I pissed my pants, he's like, he's good. We can trust this guy. Use Roback right now. Roback.com. Promo code YAK.
Starting point is 00:01:40 Q-Zips, polos, hoodies, joggers, shorts. I'm wearing the sweatshirt right now. It is very comfortable roback.com promo code yak roan i'm so happy you're back it's great to see you i'll be honest this office looks better than even it did in that mega viral video that you guys have going on it fucking looks incredible or just all it's just bright it's like buzzing there's people all around is that live yeah that's why we can do this that's all the time and i didn't even get a full tour but even just the entryway it looks uh like silicon
Starting point is 00:02:11 valley-ish a little bit like a little bit like yeah it's like google's facility dude i shot a wedgie before we started you can see it right there oh just sitting just sitting there stew um yeah it's it's it, we will mess it up. Oh, of course. But for the time being, what's the plan about scuffing the basketball court? Well, good question, because we had 250 people here last night for sales up front, and it is scuffed. I schmoozed my dick off last night. The floor is sticky and scuffed right now.
Starting point is 00:02:43 You were schmoozing? My God, was I. Dude, Nicky Smokes, the line of the night, comes up to me. So it's like, I mean, you've been to a million sales up front. There's a bunch of people here. And he just, no joke, just slides over to me and goes, Yo, you crushed it with the chicks tonight. I was like, do you think these are my friends?
Starting point is 00:03:01 What are we talking about? As soon as you left, did you see the tour he led? It was all women. Oh, my God. god at first it was three then it was five it peaked at seven he was dead serious like dude solid race like you got a lot of chicks here yeah like i got a lot of chicks they were all attractive like oh that's what good job boy bringing the yeah we're getting the men yeah yeah like you you you crush this because i was worried it was going to be a sausage fest. That's brutal. A little bit liberal with the tours.
Starting point is 00:03:29 I'm talking about the Tories. What do you mean? They were just snooping around. Oh. Well, people want to see it. That's fine. They want to check it out. They were using this studio as a rest bench.
Starting point is 00:03:40 Just come in here, take a little rest, and then get back out there. Which is fine. But I looked over and there was just people sitting here like it was a waiting room. Yeah. It does feel a little intrusive when it's that many people in our office. Where's off limits, though? Where would you prefer that day to go? I don't think anything was off limits, but I just walked into our studio.
Starting point is 00:03:58 And there was a bunch of people? I think they were judging. Were they breaking out the lines? They didn't look happy to be there. They weren't breaking out lines? No dumping sack. I said that I had to send an email just being like, Nicky Smokes, no dumping sack.
Starting point is 00:04:11 And also, like, drink, but don't get drunk. Counterpoint, if you let Nicky Smokes black out and dump sack, do you think he could have made huge sales? There would have been at least one business idea out of that. I would agree with you there. Like, what if he just started slinging deals? Yeah. yeah yeah if he's starting to do blow through a talkie oh jack and actual coke yeah so yeah it's good it's good to have roan back um by the way the new stella blue coffee uh we have holiday flavors butter cookie which is yak approved so it's brewed by the yak
Starting point is 00:04:46 you can see the logo right there so everyone should go buy it and gingerbread i had both this morning oh both a tie for first actually love that yeah love that so here's what we're gonna do for the for however long the yak lasts today i just texted uh the guy who helps run stella blue and i said to update me for1,000 of sales we do during the Yak, everyone gets a shot, half-court shot for $500. What? I like that. What?
Starting point is 00:05:16 Let's go. So if we sell 20,000, you guys are all going to get 20 shots. What? Yeah. Okay. Oh, my God. But there's a twist. Okay. There's a twist. There always has. Oh my god. But there's a twist. Okay.
Starting point is 00:05:26 There's a twist. There always has to be a twist. At the end, I get one single half-court shot, and if I hit it, I get all the money back. Deal. Yeah, love that. Take those odds. We owe you that much money. That would be great.
Starting point is 00:05:41 Titus, you have to shoot from the green line, not the half-court. You gotta go a little farther back. got to go a little farther back. I get a scoot up? You get a little farther back. But yeah, so go buy it right now. Go buy it. Sell bluecoffee.com, and we will update it.
Starting point is 00:05:54 And yeah, we'll take some half court shots during the show. Hell yeah. By the way, did you get the beer goggles for tonight? I think they might have arrived. I'll check. I had them shipped here. Because I was hoping to get a test run, because there is a non-zero chance. I just like vomit. Let me text Paige. I vomit everywhere. Yeah arrived. I'll check. I had them shipped here. Because I was hoping to get a test run because there is a non-zero chance. I just like vomit.
Starting point is 00:06:07 Let me text Paige. I vomit everywhere. Yeah, let me text Paige and see. Because I'm trying to run around in beer goggles. Oh. I want to see. By the way. What's going to happen?
Starting point is 00:06:13 You're wearing beer goggles for Yak basketball? For Yak basketball, yeah. Are you serious? When we practiced the other day, I was wearing hockey gloves. We can run back. Yeah, that would be fine. But beer goggles would be more fun. Definitely.
Starting point is 00:06:23 For me and I think the audience. Just assuming I don't. Are you playing? Yeah. Oh, that would be fine. But beer goggles would be more fun. Definitely. For me and I think the audience. Just assuming I don't. Are you playing? Yeah. Oh, shit. Yes, or you won it last year. I'm 100% playing. You had the highlight, right?
Starting point is 00:06:32 The banked and saved? Yeah, hopped up on the scores table. I feel like if anybody hits a long shot, you have to hop on scores table. Did I invite Mincy to play? Yeah, last night. Okay. So he's playing too. Amazing.
Starting point is 00:06:44 I didn't realize I did that. Amazing. Brandon. Yeah. Are you sleeping at my apartment tonight? I am. Spending the night. He texted me at like 2 a.m. last night.
Starting point is 00:06:53 He was like, can I sleep at your place? Yeah. I could get a hotel. No, it's fine. Stay at my place. Okay. You said you had an extra bed, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:00 And you have a parking spot. I do. Those are the two things I need. A bed and a parking spot. Oh, boy. And I need to stay. Why? Because you're staying you're staying late yeah i mean the game will get over 11 11 30 right and then it would take me an hour to get home and then i have to come back at 5 a.m support it yeah yeah so sleepover yeah it's a sleepover it's an extra bedroom or a couch
Starting point is 00:07:18 situation extra bedroom yeah that's that's kind of nice yeah no it sounds sounds wonderful and i have the decor up in that room, too. What's the decor? You're sleeping under the flag of Wheeling, West Virginia. You got the Burger King Pokemon drive-thru sign. Right. And then you got a poster of the Canadian trio B44 in there. B44, that's your favorite group?
Starting point is 00:07:40 That's my favorite Canadian trio. They sing Get Down. It's about reciprocating oral sex. How's that one go? Positively? If you get down on me, I'll get down on you. When did it come? What era is this?
Starting point is 00:07:51 The music video is a little racist. Okay, how? What kind? It's like this little black boy finds a viewfinder in the garbage can and puts it on, and then he can just dunk. He sees himself dunking. That doesn't seem racist. It doesn't seem that racist. It has... I think you saying it's racist might be... The. That doesn't seem racist.
Starting point is 00:08:08 I think you saying it's racist might be... I think there was nothing racist until you said it was racist. Yeah, no doubt about it. You just said it. No, watch it. There's undertones. Dark undertones. Now that feels racist.
Starting point is 00:08:24 Certainly. Certainly. Wait. Steven, what are we doing? Oh, yeah, Steve. What? Why do you keep forgetting? Why do you keep forgetting, dude? In fairness, we kind of forgot, too.
Starting point is 00:08:38 No, I remember. Okay. They took our chairs to the arena tonight. We don't have chairs in here today. Are you serious? Yeah. You guys don't have chairs? We complained about the chairs so much that they just took them.
Starting point is 00:08:48 Wait, you guys are standing the whole show? Standing? There's no chairs. We need to find them some chairs. Oh, my God. All right. There's a mini-thon going on in there. Tweet that out to the New York office.
Starting point is 00:08:56 We don't have chairs. Yeah, we don't have chairs. What the fuck? We have too many chairs, honestly. Yeah. Would you like to trade the chairs for 10,000 square feet of space? So, wait, what's been going on, Roan? You've been, you know, I feel like you've been back and forth Philly.
Starting point is 00:09:13 Pat Bev Show's been crushing it. A lot of Philly, a lot of Pat Bev Show. Big game tonight, Sixers-Celtics. Oh. Massive game tonight. And we're trying to get on the. Oh, Jesus Christ. What's going on with Steven? I'm more curious. We're going to have a massive game tonight, and we're trying to get on the... Oh, Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:09:27 What's going on with Steven? I'm more curious about... He runs suicides every day before the act. He does? He has to run one suicide to see if he can... Mintzy beat him on the other day. Wow. His current time to beat, I believe, is like 30.9. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:37 We're just basically torturing him and watching him run. And now somebody's shooting from his second deck. Yeah, it's an easy throwaway 30 seconds of the yak. That is nice, though. And I'm sure he's like a little dog. You've got to kind of run him, or a big dog kind of. Is he getting faster? Get that energy out of him.
Starting point is 00:09:53 He's been doing... No. He's not quick. No, he's not quick. All right, ready, Steven? Three, two, one, go. He's also been doing, after each one, he's been doing the black power fist. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:08 He celebrates. He celebrates with the black power fist. Like the 1968 Olympics? Yeah. Exactly like that. Literally exactly like that. Someone pointed out he runs past the line. Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:10:20 I said that right away. It's so stupid. He jumps over. Oh, no. He's so stupid. He doesn't just touch the line. Oh, no. He's so stupid. He's loud today. He's stomping. He needs some mobility training.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Oh, this is his worst. He's slow today. Oh, that's... Oh, man. Oh, no. Didn't we say he had to PR every day? Every single day. Let's tell him he got a PR here just so we can see the black power.
Starting point is 00:10:42 And then we'll tell him it's wrong. Steven, that was wrong. Steven. That was bad. Steven, no. You broke your record again. 28-9-2. Let's see the celebration. 28-2. Give us a celebration.
Starting point is 00:10:59 What? What the hell is that? Do it again. Do it again for the people in the camera. Wait. Look at the camera. Here we go. Why does the left arm do so much work there? It's like action figure-esque. Like the Bushwhackers.
Starting point is 00:11:12 That wasn't a PR. You were actually the slowest you've ever been. I had blood tests this morning. What? He has blood tests this morning. What percent vaccine are you? Much higher than yesterday. Wait, you got a vaccine too?
Starting point is 00:11:26 No. What did that mean, man? Don't talk on the camera. Talk in the mic. Talk in the mic because I don't even know what you're saying right now. You had a blood test today. You're much higher vaccine, but you didn't get a vaccine. Well, yeah, because I got less blood.
Starting point is 00:11:40 How much blood did they take? But percentage-wise, it would stay. A lot, like three vials. That's not a lot. It was substantial. These type of vials? Yeah. That's not a lot.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Whatever. When you give blood, you give like a quart, right? I don't think, man. A quart? Is that too much? Are you going to Transylvania? Yeah. I've given blood.
Starting point is 00:11:59 It's the whole bag. You give a gallon, a single gallon. Yeah, you give one gallon. Oh. These are lab tests. For what? Doctor's appointment. But what's wrong with you?
Starting point is 00:12:09 Nothing. There's no standard blood work? Just check your triglycerides, your cholesterol, all that shit? Kind of acting like a chick right now. Oh, you think that slowed down your speed and agility? Has to, right? No. No, it lightened you.
Starting point is 00:12:20 Less blood? Yeah. More space for oxygen. I guess you still got low 30s, so yeah, it's pretty good. What was I, 32? What are you hoping to find from this blood test? I didn't ask to do it, it's just they...
Starting point is 00:12:35 Huh. They can only find out bad shit from this. Yeah, that's why you never do anything. They're going to tell you that you have to stop doing something. What's your blood type? I don't know. Do you guys know your blood type? I don't know, but you did seem like a guy who would know your blood type? I don't know. Do you guys know your blood type? I don't know, but you did seem like a guy who would know your blood type. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:49 I know Ryu's blood type. What is it? Ryu's. Oh. Oh. How do you know that? What? What?
Starting point is 00:12:55 Is he a judge? You know that. You're talking about from Street Fighter 2? Yeah. They always give the character intros and it says what blood type they are. And were you a Ryu guy? So what was E. Honda's blood type? I don't know.'t any on the guy you're a ryu guy yeah and blanca
Starting point is 00:13:09 but he's he didn't really a mutant yeah we didn't test him yeah what guile any any idea no you're a guy you got i'm not i was i was a zangief guy oh my god i've never met a zangief guy i love zangief what's going on right now are you don't like zangief he has no powers he's just a wrestler no he has all power he's just power he's a big grizzly bear he's the easiest guy to defeat in street fighter 2 by a mile no he's not dalson beats you just stand far away you kick how are we gonna settle that we gotta settle this with some street fighter 2 i feel like you guys gotta play zangief against ryu i'll have a super nintendo here very soon not today but it's on the way sign me up who's got the best studio of the or like who at this point like who has the most setup studio um pardon my take pardon my take although we're
Starting point is 00:13:55 not fully set up i'd say you were fully set up yeah i saw you guys have oh no this this one might be the best yeah this is the biggest location wise yeah location and biggest i this one might be the best. Yeah. This is the biggest. Location-wise. Yeah, location and biggest. I think this might be it. Anus Studio has the Blades of Chaos now, though, which is cool. Huge. What's that? We have two Blades of Chaos. They come as a pair.
Starting point is 00:14:14 We have good chairs. Chairs are big. Chairs are huge. We have a baseball mitt up there. Yeah, one of them's a baseball mitt. Oh, yeah, the chair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Does your air conditioner not work?
Starting point is 00:14:23 I think ours works. Okay. The lights are too bright in this office. Our your air conditioner not work? I think ours works. Okay. The lights are too bright in this office. Our air conditioner doesn't work. You like these complaints? Roan and Sass have a bed and bathroom in theirs. The lights are just a little too bright. You know what I'm saying, Roan?
Starting point is 00:14:34 The acoustics, there's like an extra little ping. There's like a little bit of an echo that it just takes a second to get used to it. Yeah. The art's fucking sick, though. Yeah, so this was a i i never even mentioned it this is a um local chicago street artist who came in and did this i ran into others yeah he put this shit you see it everywhere yeah because the bear is what he does everywhere you wonder what the nft guys were doing after the after all that went under right the nft artist does it kind
Starting point is 00:15:01 of look like a little bit tagging definitely do. Tagging the streets. Honestly, since I've been gone, my rating for the top three abs on the show, Titus number one. When I touched your abs, they were fucking ripply, believe it or not. Fucking KB, I go number two. Yours were pretty less defined, but more. Have you touched them or seen them since I started doing the self-dick sucks? What?
Starting point is 00:15:34 All right, I only touched your lats and your lower core, so I didn't touch your front abs. But from that, I'm giving you number two. Number three, I'm going to give to TJ. TJ is crushing it. Having the space between the last time I saw him and now is like you can really tell how much progress he's made. He looks fucking great. He's disappearing. And what about four? Who's fourth?
Starting point is 00:15:55 All right, Big Cat. Thank you. Thank you. Look at this. Wait. Watch me flex. Pretty good. There's me flexing.
Starting point is 00:16:03 Come on. I'll let it go. But if you had to pick a fifth. I'd say Mook. There's me flexing. Hold on, I'll let it go. But if you had to pick a fifth? I'd say Mook. I'd say Mook. Yeah, Mook is twisted steel. Yeah. Hard body.
Starting point is 00:16:14 It's good because we traded Sass for Mook, and Mook also doesn't take off his T-shirt. Yeah. That's a lifelong goal. I'll die with my shirt on. But what S hat brings in negativity Mook brings in positivity Mook how you feeling after yesterday's
Starting point is 00:16:32 Powwow with Dave Oh yeah I saw pieces of it He didn't do well Do you have a clip I can watch Mook needs to You have to wait three years until you talk to Dave. That's known.
Starting point is 00:16:47 I mean, I still don't have words. My mom texted me today, and she was like, do you still have a job? That was embarrassing. Oh, no. It went that bad? It was terrible. Yeah. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:16:58 Dave sat in your chair and was talking for, I don't know how long it was, like five minutes, ten minutes maybe? No, it was 40 minutes of Michigan versus Ohio State. That was at the end, I'm saying, but then at one point, Dave just kind of pivoted and turned and saw Mook and did the whole like, wait, who the fuck is this guy thing? Can we see the clip, TJ? Which was...
Starting point is 00:17:17 Was this your first Dave experience? First time ever, like, speaking to him. Wait, we can't hear it. We can't hear it, TJ. Can't hear it. Like, Marone, you're honest, unbiased. Rank how this interaction went. I've seen it already. Still can't hear it.
Starting point is 00:17:33 F minus. Still can't hear it. Yeah, interesting. Nope. So they're talking right now. Okay, okay. We don't need any sound on this at all. Mook sabotage. Did they take the sound already to Wintrust?
Starting point is 00:17:52 So why did Dave sit down for that long? He just was trying to clown with the boys? He was just here. It started camaraderie. I thought it was going to be like a brief like he always is, and then he was in the mood to talk. He had to talk to Hank about playing girl, and then he had in the mood to talk he had to talk to hank about about playing girl and then he had to talk to who else he talked to titus we argued about ohio state
Starting point is 00:18:09 michigan but he was doing like performance reviews a little bit just peppering around talking about everyone he saw like whether you're doing a good job or not we it started because steven threw us all under the bus yesterday and told dave that he was the best dressed for the upfront so then we found that there was at least 12 people better dressed than him. So we had to apologize to Dave. I was in the top 25% most dressed up.
Starting point is 00:18:34 You were dressed like a dorm room magician. Accurate. He took that as a compliment. He really does. You got a chest full of puppets. First day of college, you're like, hey, since we're going to be best friends, can I show you my puppets? But you have to retreat to your dorm for like 25 minutes to get the trick right before you can do it. You guys have seen my two tricks.
Starting point is 00:19:00 They're pretty good. Yeah, they are. You do have two very good tricks. And so everybody was getting performance reviews. Steven was throwing people under the bus and then he just pivoted to mook i was talking to tj and tj was like yeah he just saw the fear on your face and just wrecked you yeah he could just see it you can't show the weakness yeah you have resting fear face though he does i'm always scared i'm never not scared you're coward presenting do you know what you should do is tonight when you get to win trust you should just take a look He does. I'm always scared. I'm never not scared. You're coward presenting.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Do you know what you should do is tonight when you get to Wintrust, you should just take a look around and be like, Dave, you could never sell this out. Yeah. Then start that. I don't know if I want that. That's where Sask got his strength back. Went to Madison Square Garden. He went smoke for smoke. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:19:41 No, he stood up to Dave. People were pumped. I don't think I have that in my bag right now. I think I gotta develop that bag. So what is your plan now? Just suck off his dick whenever you see him? Just don't make eye contact ever? Immediately after the show,
Starting point is 00:19:56 you said, what did you say to him? Nice finally meeting you? I said nice to finally meet you, Dave. Oh yeah, the show. It was a walk off. And Dave just looks up for me from his phone and goes, all right, Mook. Oh, good. That's not bad.
Starting point is 00:20:11 Yeah, that's good. Yeah. I don't know. It's good? I was getting texts from all my boys back in Philly, like, yeah, way to get absolutely wrecked by Dave, dude. Way to stand up for yourself. That is like a fetish for a lot of dudes out there.
Starting point is 00:20:24 To get wrecked by Dave? Yeah. A lot of Philly suburb sports guys would kill for it. They were like, why didn't you call him a strap job? I'm like, it's the first time meeting the guy. Why didn't you call him a strap job? What did you call him? You should have called him a strap job.
Starting point is 00:20:37 What did you call him earlier in the show? I called him full body boss man. That's annoying. Did you enunciate it? That would annoy me. You fizzled off after it was Dave goes what do you like Dave was like what do you do here mooks like I production but you know I'll come on the act and whatever and he's like so you're you're like one of those production guys like once he goes you're a stand-up comic so you probably don't want to be behind the camera
Starting point is 00:21:01 you want to be in front of it and then then Luke's just like, appreciate that. Like, he was appreciate that full body. It was a compliment. I blacked out. As soon as Dave started, like full body, like looking at me, I blacked out. Oh,
Starting point is 00:21:14 wait, you were shortening it to full body. Yeah. Just call it full body. Cause I only saw that clip, but I didn't know what you meant by full body. I was trying to get boss man out, but he couldn't get boss man out for the best. Yeah. I don't know what you meant by full body. I was trying to get boss man out. He couldn't get boss man out.
Starting point is 00:21:26 For the best. I don't know. It was a jarring experience. I'm happy it happened because now I'll be a little more prepared for next time, I think. I think that's about as good as it can go because what's the other alternative that Dave is like, I fucking love this dude. Like, have you guys seen this guy, Luke? If he loves you the first time he meets you that means you got
Starting point is 00:21:45 some wrong You don't want that he also Dave is a big respect like KB and Nick like everyone loves them So Dave might not love him, but he loves it. Everyone loves that. What the hell? That's how it works. Oh, man. Savor that. Yeah. I'll say this. KB had my back yesterday, dude.
Starting point is 00:22:11 Did he? KB was riding. That was auto talk. I was just, what are you talking about? I texted him after. I'm like, thanks for having my back. That was weird. Auto talk. I didn't have your back.
Starting point is 00:22:19 Yeah, you were riding. I said, yeah. I said, you kill it for us. You balance behind and in front you were quivering boy I'm afraid of Dave to my core that's fair
Starting point is 00:22:29 I'd be the same way you don't want to challenge the full body boss man not at all that just that makes me cringe full body so bad yeah
Starting point is 00:22:38 not pirate press what was the best case scenario after saying that like making him blush oh I am full body. You're right. Oh, no. Ugly Christmas sweater?
Starting point is 00:22:49 Is there a time for a full body boss man sweater? I don't know. Full body boss man. I think I could tell. KB, how you feeling off your blunt? KB told us right before we started that he had a blunt at 6 a.m. Be greeted with judge. Well, no.
Starting point is 00:23:04 Not judge. It's just very. You were like 6 a.m. Be greeted with judge. Well, no, not judge. It's just very, you were like, 6 a.m. is very early. That's what I'm saying. I thought by the time the yak rolled around, I would just be like a very residual mild buzz. And I kind of am pretty high still. What made you want to take a, did you set an alarm for it? I'm used to waking up and working out intensely.
Starting point is 00:23:25 And I'm like, I kind of like fizzle out. I kind of get tired by this time. Someone's like, I'm used to waking up and working out intensely. And I'm like, I kind of like fizzle out. I kind of get tired by this time. So I was like, I'm going to do the opposite. I'm going to get high at six and maybe I'll feel a little bit jovial. Did you work out after you smoked? No. I ended up sleeping a little bit too much. You went back to sleep?
Starting point is 00:23:40 That was the goal. I wanted like an hour and a half of sleep. Off the blood. And then wake up, kind of feel it, but not really. And? That was the goal. I wanted like an hour and a half of sleep. Off the blunt. And then wake up, kind of feel it, but not really. And be good for the day. So this was an experiment. Yes. I like that.
Starting point is 00:23:52 But it's not going well. The blunt. Actually, it might be. Okay. It's still like a little slow, I guess. I like this biohacking. Yeah. You should make it.
Starting point is 00:24:02 You got to experiment. Yeah. What about smoking the blunt and then working out right after? I can't do that. Why? My pain tolerance goes way down. Yeah, Kevin Spacey in American Beauty. Then kissing your neighbor.
Starting point is 00:24:15 Is that what happened? Yeah. Dating a high school girl. Murdered by your neighbor. Wait, he got murdered or did the guy kill himself? No, he got killed. Did the neighbor guy kill him? or did the guy kill himself? No, he got killed. Did he? The neighbor guy killed him.
Starting point is 00:24:28 And then did he kill himself? I don't think he did. He suffocated him in a plastic bag. Are we thinking of a different movie? Wait, how did American Beauty end? No, you're thinking of American Psycho. I think it was a psychological thriller, and I don't think it ended in death, did it? American Beauty.
Starting point is 00:24:44 American Beauty did. There definitely was death, because there was the whole gun thing. And then he's wiping the gun. William H. Macy. Was it William H. Macy that was cleaning the gun? No. You're thinking of Fargo. That's Fargo. That was a wood chipper. And he shoved them in the wood chipper. What? I was just looking. Are they fucking with me?
Starting point is 00:25:00 I've never seen American Beauty. Is that the movie with the guy that films that has the plastic bag? Yeah, paperback. It's so beautiful. Yeah. It's so beautiful. And we all thought that was like, oh my God.
Starting point is 00:25:10 I remember being aroused by that movie poster as a kid. That is such great cinematography. How did they come up with that? The neighbor thinks that he's fucking his kid. Is he not? No. He's fantasizing about her. No, the neighbor was a Marine, like military captain, and he tried to kiss Kevin Spacey, and then he's like, wait, I'm gay.
Starting point is 00:25:27 And then he killed himself. No. No. He killed Kevin Spacey. Who fucks the pie? Like when the dad walks home. He found out he was gay and then killed himself? That's stand by me.
Starting point is 00:25:37 He's fucking the pie. And then he gets sung by bees. His glasses. Yeah. Remember like it was yesterday. Oh, you guys have all the tech people now. Did you just see somebody
Starting point is 00:25:52 wearing glasses and assume they were a tech person? You're right. How the fuck did, Corey, come here. Uh-oh. You're a cinematographer guy.
Starting point is 00:26:01 You're a big, you know, artsy film guy. Yeah, sit down, sit down. Smutledge, everyone knows him. Two Jimmy John's sandwiches. How did American Beauty end? Oh, yeah. I just told you how it ended.
Starting point is 00:26:13 Oh, yeah. Do you want like a specific? Yeah, yeah, yeah. We want all the specifics. He... Didn't he kill himself? See? See? Do you want what he knows know do you want all the specifics did you text him did he kill himself he killed himself at the end oh he didn't wait who's killed
Starting point is 00:26:36 himself i thought he got killed the dad no that was seven the marine yeah oh yeah okay sorry i'm getting all the kevin Spacey movies mixed up. Yeah, the dad revealed that he was a little gay, a little in the closet, and then he came over and killed him. And then did he kill himself? No. Let's just say he did. No, he's cleaning the gun.
Starting point is 00:26:57 And then the wife gets framed for it later, because we see her crying in the closet with a gun, because that's what happens. That's implied. Oh, God damn it wow underwood kills himself k-packs kaiser so say kisses a guy and then that guy kills him and before he kills himself right okay yeah brandon was right we got all right great looked it just looked it up. Is it William H. Macy? No, it's not William H. Macy. Ah, so Brandon wasn't. The guy's gay and then he kills Kevin Spacey. Is it Chris Cooper?
Starting point is 00:27:29 It's Chris Cooper. I don't know if there's a framing of anything. It's Chris Cooper. That's implied. Oh, it is? Yeah, because she's crying in the closet. He's been killed downstairs. She doesn't even know it.
Starting point is 00:27:38 The closet. She has a gun on her because she was going to. She was going to kill him? She was going to kill him, but it's implied. You've got to have a good intellect to watch that movie. That was like 90s good intellect. I had it explained to me. That's like you ought to know
Starting point is 00:27:53 good intellect. That was pretty good, though. I'm happy we cleared that up. Thanks, Corey. Cool, guys. Appreciate it. We didn't really clear it up. I just was proven right. Right, but we cleared it proven right The waters were murky Have we sold some coffee yet? Yeah, I'm waiting for him to text me back
Starting point is 00:28:11 It smells so damn good What an aroma TJ, can we play videos yet or no? I don't know I want to see move Can I go find TJ a chair? Nope, still nope This is a problem The what? I want to see move. Can I go find TJ a chair? Nope. Not quite. Nope. Still nope.
Starting point is 00:28:26 Hmm. This is a problem. Thank God. The what? Nothing. Oh, here we go. I have no idea what's going on. All right, start it over. Start it over.
Starting point is 00:28:32 Yes. I think you as the leader should be aware of that and should know that. Talk about it every now and then. Talk about it. I'm just vibing. Vibing to what? Nothing. I have no idea what's going on.
Starting point is 00:28:50 Why were you? Oh, no. This is not good. Mook, how bad do you want this show to end? I'm chilling. I'm chilling. Yeah, I'm just going to stay in the pocket here. I think you as the leader.
Starting point is 00:29:02 Oh, man. Is it over? Yeah. Yeah, I mean Is it over? Yeah. It just ended. Yeah, I mean, they were talking 40 minutes about Michigan-Ohio State football. I have nothing to add to that conversation. This was before that. This was before the Michigan-Ohio State.
Starting point is 00:29:17 This was the end? I was asked subconsciously. Yeah, that's the first combo there. Remember Mepmuk? Yeah, we passed. Yeah, I've given you some head nods. I didn't know that you were like content. Kind of production, social content. I just landed here a little bit. Yeah, he kills it for us. He does a lot. Yeah. Pretty serious.
Starting point is 00:29:36 Obviously if you're doing stand-up you want to be in front of camera not behind it. I appreciate that full body. I don't know that. Oh no! That's when you use full body? I appreciate that He balances it well it just happens Oh Okay, thank you, thank you page Oh, food? In an Amazon box? Oh, no, this is food. Okay. Thank you. Thank you, Paige.
Starting point is 00:30:07 You're welcome. Thank you. Let's see. These look like it could be it. These look like it could be it. Wait, what are those? The drunk goggles. Oh, yes.
Starting point is 00:30:16 Drunker than the last ones? Drunker than the last ones, I hope. It might be the same. What the hell? Are those legitimately debilitating? Yes. Yeah, I want to take it first we got him I gotta take him we got him why don't you go play one-on-one Brandon all right why don't you guys just go on a driving competition so you can get the farthest good luck brother look oh he's bunning up oh fuck yeah try to walk dude you can't do
Starting point is 00:30:47 shit in these yeah oh he's follow you're strutting so he's gonna be strong oh he just a lot of stuff just get some stuff so Titus is gonna wear these while playing yak basketball tonight. Go play him, Brandon. This will be funny. Titus one-on-one with Brandon, drunk goggles. Shoot for it? Let Titus shoot for it. What if he just starts puking everywhere?
Starting point is 00:31:16 Oh, shit. Yeah, maybe. Okay. This might be bad. This is gonna be great. What do you mean this is going to be bad? That's not an accurate representation of what drunk driving is like. He's fine.
Starting point is 00:31:28 Okay. It wasn't the funnest thing in the world. Uh-oh. All right, here we go. Oh, that was close. He's low-key automatic. Take his ass. Take his ass to the cup.
Starting point is 00:31:48 Why are you backing out on a dude who can't fucking see? Oh, oh. Brandon! Oh. Oh. Oh! Oh Now you gotta play Brandon see if you can beat anybody This is Lamar Odom simulator. Holy shit, that went in? Yeah, that was insane.
Starting point is 00:32:26 It looked wet as hell. This one was pretty good, too. I can't really see. I was just looking at the... I was looking down at the lines to see where I was at on the floor. We're just automatic. Michael Jordan... Oh, Big Cat's got a shoe untied.
Starting point is 00:32:37 Didn't he close his eyes for a free throw or something? Yeah, yeah. Same type of vibe. You're basically Michael Jordan. Well, we know a bunch of his friends. You can't even do it. It's very difficult. You made it look easy.
Starting point is 00:32:56 It was just muscle memory. I was looking down to see where I was at on the court and then just guessing. Oh shit! Alright, who's up? Someone rotated. let's go damn full body it is it is very disorienting yeah especially a huge Full body is great With people running by you I thought when you had your hand out You were right in front of my face Were you?
Starting point is 00:33:32 I mean I had probably two feet in front of your face Yeah depth perception It's not great with it Damn that's going to be awesome I just bought the new meta Ray-Ban glasses Have you guys seen these? Have you heard about this? Have you heard about this? Have you seen this?
Starting point is 00:33:46 No. It's basically like $300 glasses that have cameras in them. And you can stream to anything. And they're just, I think, the future of spying on people and shit like that. Do you know the guys who do the Walmart videos where they talk crazy? Is that what they use? These are brand new. These just came out in October.
Starting point is 00:34:11 It's just a brand new tech. So what would you hypothetically use them for? I'm recording with these glasses on my face. These are the Ray-Ban Meta smart glasses, and they're going to change the way that we create. Let's walk around campus and show you what these can do. Hey Meta, start recording. smart glasses and they're going to change the way that we create. You done looking at yourself in the mirror? Let's walk around campus and show you what these can do.
Starting point is 00:34:27 Hey, Meta, start recording. Okay, so the first thing we're going to talk about. POV porn is going to be so much easier. What's that mean, bro? Great POV shots, which are awesome for BTS content. I think Versace might have also got these. This is a fucking copycat, bro. So if you're going live on Instagram, let's say you're recording on your phone. Chat can actually just click on the button and switch to the glasses to get live with the crazy things about these glasses.
Starting point is 00:34:53 The biggest failures. Max, take us. Wasn't that what this was? That was like augmented reality. It was ahead of its time? I think it's similar. I think that, uh... Salad, have it. That's awful. Shit, dude. I guess that... Salad, have it. That's awful.
Starting point is 00:35:06 Shit, dude. I guess I was mean. Oh, my God. I was going to say it to whoever walked by. Sorry, Max. Max, you're probably hungry. I didn't mean that. No, no, it's okay. I literally was going to say it to whoever walked by.
Starting point is 00:35:16 Yeah, no, no. No, I do need this. I appreciate it. All right, go eat your salad. No, he's bottom of the... I didn't realize that was... Salad heavy. Shit. That didn't realize that was salad heavy shit that didn't come across no that was so mean that was like yesterday when we were counting the people better
Starting point is 00:35:30 dressed than steven chay and brandon was just walking up to women and he would just look back in the zoom being like six yeah and then walk away i didn't think about that at the time oh six you guys agree we're're like, yeah. Yeah. Next. And then Megan got ten. She was ten. That's fucked up. Wait, so what do those glasses do?
Starting point is 00:36:00 I think that you could, excuse me, if I was like, if I wanted to do walk around streaming type of thing, or you could film something walking around, but really if I I was sneaking into a fucking Notre Dame game or some shit, that would be the best way to film it or some shit like that. New sneak in technology. Have you tested them out yet? They just came yesterday. Are you planning on being a rascal at any point in time? I hope to get back into rascaling.
Starting point is 00:36:17 No. Everybody got a little bit too hip to it, and everybody was all, anytime I'd do something, they'd be like, oh. We played that game night, that game about lying one time, and every time that there was a chance to suspect someone of lying, you guys suspected I was lying. Yeah. So you've been off your rascal shit? I haven't rascaled in a while. You should talk
Starting point is 00:36:36 to Nicky Smokes. He's a prankster. Has he pranked yet? He pranked the yak. What did he do? Oh, that's his full time. He put a phone underneath Nick's chair playing porn. What? Yeah. Damn. I was so freaking embarrassed.
Starting point is 00:36:48 You probably must have got hard as fuck. I did. He's a prankster. You got smoked. Yeah, damn. Was it filmed or that was for the love of the game? It was on the act. It was on the act, yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:59 Fucking loved it. Everyone immediately checked their Safari. It was like, who left it open? No worse feeling. Yeah. But it was? No worse feeling. But it was him the entire time. You guys ever get scared of being connected to the Bluetooth? No.
Starting point is 00:37:10 That's a huge fear of... Or having to type a domain name that starts with P and somebody's looking behind you, standing behind you. You gotta go private mode for that. I'm impatient. It's funny. I get post-nut clarity and I immediately delete delete my browsing history as soon as it's over. I have never had exit out clear.
Starting point is 00:37:34 No. Ian Fleming. Yeah. The most obvious Fleming come on the Yak guys ever Oh man Fleming was here on Monday And he was just hitting wiffle balls From there into the Yak studio
Starting point is 00:37:53 Until one came in and he was like I guess I gotta sit with the boys But he heard us talking about him and was giggling Came in and pulled Nick's hair Flirted with him Hello Stuart I just want to say quickly Because I got to meet with Blue Chew Came in and pulled Nick's hair Flirted with him Hello Stuart Kick sand on me Hello men
Starting point is 00:38:05 I just want to say Quickly Because I got to meet With Blue Chew Try to write some more money For the company Love it Why not
Starting point is 00:38:11 The key I guess We're doing 150 million A year in advertising I want it up to A quarter of a billion Are these real numbers Real numbers Okay
Starting point is 00:38:20 Who told you those numbers They're Stu Feiner numbers I added them in my head Got it I looked at all the product. I was going to say. I have a little inside information. It's $150 million.
Starting point is 00:38:28 Okay. Yes. Yes. Between New York and between here. Let me just say, first of all, your speech last night brought almost a tear to my heart because it was a transformation from when I met you in New York. Yeah. When I met you in PFT, you first started Pardon My Take.
Starting point is 00:38:46 I was on Pardon My Take. You were the new hot thing in town. But a lot of the naysayers said, let's see if this has legs. And not only did it have legs, but your dreams came true. Thank you, Stu. You deserve it. It was a throwaway speech, but yes. And you deserve it.
Starting point is 00:39:04 Yes. I mean, I don't know. I wasn't actually listening to the exact verbiage, but I just was so proud of you being there. It was your moment. Stu, by the way, last night came and Dave was like, you're a
Starting point is 00:39:18 psycho for inviting Stu. And I was like, I did not invite Stu. And I walked up to Stu and was like, Stu, I didn't invite you Did I? He's like No of course not But I saw what was happening
Starting point is 00:39:27 So I came Yeah you're not going to Miss this for the world Well Dave said The first time he met me You know First day he met me Anything we have forever
Starting point is 00:39:39 You're invited to You know Cart Blanche And I'm not shy And I thought this was A great opportunity To meet the fans, meet the advertisers, hug it out with them, hug it out with Cars.com, you know, Muck Boots, you know, whatever it is, Blue Chew. And, you know, it was fabulous.
Starting point is 00:39:55 I felt great. I have a question, Stu. Yes, sir. Has your wife seen any bad omens recently? Because I remember when you and— Oh, when Big Cat and PFT were doing the— Big Cat and PFT were doing the van talk. Yes, and the show was cursed because a bird dropped a rabbit on your property or something like that.
Starting point is 00:40:14 A hawk picked up a squirrel, ate it, and Big Cat and PFT were talking to ESPN at the time on a bench in front of my guest cottage. And when they left, the dead caucus of the bird was dropped onto the bench. And me, PFT, Big Hat, and Hank were doing part of my take in my backyard at the time. They left and Sandy said, that deal's dead, whatever the fuck they were talking about. And they didn't even, we didn't know it was even a deal. But it looked like a deal. You know how when two people whisper in
Starting point is 00:40:41 and they're back and forth and whatever. No, she thinks everything's and forth and whatever. No. She thinks everything is going to be great. Amazing. You know. So I feel positive. Fingers crossed. Great.
Starting point is 00:40:51 Fingers crossed. And then I didn't know the yak rules are able. Like last year when I saw the yak and everybody was running with the ball. I didn't know that's allowed. Yeah. So that's allowed. That's exciting. Yes.
Starting point is 00:41:04 Very exciting Yes Yes I love it Alright we'll see you tonight Yes Love you Front row
Starting point is 00:41:09 Front row Courtside because of you God bless you Fucking love it May God be with you I'm glad your dreams come true And thank you for making mine too I love that
Starting point is 00:41:17 I love you You're the best I love you You look great Stu Thank you Thank you very much I love you more Stu That was beautiful
Starting point is 00:41:23 That's Stu Fein From the heart Fucking man the myth the legend I love those shoes My shoes Thank you. Thank you very much Fucking man the myth the legend love those shoes my shoes very nice shoes looks like they match his complexion I can't help but feel like you're playing your own little game of tender sitting at that chair. People walk by, you're like, no, swipe left. Yeah, yeah. Max, you take a salad. Max, you take a salad.
Starting point is 00:41:55 Come back to me in a week. Corey, come here. Yeah, you come here. Who delivered that salad? What the hell was that salad? I don't know. It might be poisoned. That's a weird one thing to deliver. Yeah. You need a food taster in case people are trying to poison you.
Starting point is 00:42:09 Wait, also super insulting to you. Yeah. And it probably is someone else's lunch that they ordered. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it probably is. Right? Mm-hmm. It's got to be.
Starting point is 00:42:20 That's a weird thing to just have show up. Where do you guys eat around here? What's the restaurant situation? A Chick-fil-A? Yeah. I found a Chick-fil-A about 10 minutes away. I get it every day. But I didn't get it today.
Starting point is 00:42:32 The West Loop is like some of the best restaurants in the world right over here. JP Graziano? JP Graziano is over there, yeah. Bavette's? Yeah. Some really good ones. Really? I got the wrong order on Uber Eats.
Starting point is 00:42:46 I ordered a Poke Bowl, got sushi, and I instantaneously just ate it. And then the guy came back. And was like, where's my sushi? And yeah. I don't think, really, did you tell him you ate it? He came back like five minutes later when I ate it all. Oh, that was awful. It was just embarrassing.
Starting point is 00:43:03 For him? Why the fuck is it embarrassing for you? You ate the food that was given to you? Because he was going to switch within five minutes. Right. He got down the road and was like, oh, fuck. You inhaled it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:15 I heard that there is a type of restaurant that they have in Japan. It's called the Restaurant of Lost Orders, and it's completely manned by people, by older adults who have memory loss problems to raise awareness for memory loss and so when you go there you could get any order like the plot of memento
Starting point is 00:43:34 no way I swear to god I like that I swear to god oh wow look at that oh no way would that supposed to raise awareness yeah I mean yeah I didn't fuck that would make me want to fucking I'm aware of memory loss now Oh, wow, look at that. Oh, no way. Was that supposed to raise awareness? Yeah. I didn't fucking get this. That would make me want to fucking fight him.
Starting point is 00:43:47 I'm aware of memory loss now. I'm pissed. You know who's not aware? You might think it's crazy. A restaurant that can't even get your order right. All of our servers are people living with dementia. They may or may not get your order right. However, rest assured that even if your order is mistaken,
Starting point is 00:44:04 everything on our menu is delicious and one of a kind. Is this safe? I've always wanted the president to be my waiter. Is this fucked up or a good thing? I can't tell. Is this like... I think it's fucked up. Is this charity?
Starting point is 00:44:15 Is this like nice for them? Huh. Is this giving them jobs? By the way, I just got the text from the coffee guy. I made a mistake. Uh-oh. Well, we've done 6K in orders in the last 45 minutes. Oh!
Starting point is 00:44:29 That's good. Let's go. That might be big thanks to Kate. She posted a... Oh, not yes. Kate does get her shots when she comes back. She posted a thirst trap ad. Okay, so she gets her shots when she comes back.
Starting point is 00:44:42 So six shots each. This is a mistake. It smells so fucking good, though. I've just been huffing it the entire time. And it's Yak approved. So that was the whole plan was I wanted it to be the Yak was on it so that everyone can benefit in sales. Everyone gets money. And if people don't make a shot, I still will make you whole off of the sales.
Starting point is 00:45:06 That sounds pretty sexy. I'll make you so whole that you become a big body boss man. That's how whole I'll make you. It's six shots as of now. Six shots as of now. And the act could go for two hours today. What time are we going to go to the arena? I don't think we have to go until like 7 or 8.
Starting point is 00:45:24 No. Motherfucker. Oh, dude. It smells. today we're gonna go to the arena we go I don't think we have to go to like seven or eight no it smells what time do we have to go I think we I think the dresser is at three I listen to molasses on my way into work today and Brandon you'd like it oh no chef Donnie only listens to old ass war tunes And he was like If you have a girl over What war? Old, like 1800s Like Civil War?
Starting point is 00:45:52 Yeah Yeah, that one Oh man Bunch of different ones Oh Oh That would be funny if it was like The War in Iraq
Starting point is 00:46:00 This is a metal Metallica or something Wait, this is literally like This is like a mafia boss Talking to his His underboss Where'd they go Where'd they go
Starting point is 00:46:10 Shit I mean they couldn't have gone far Look at him He's literally like Giving them the orders right now Just walk to the basketball court There's no sound Yeah
Starting point is 00:46:17 No one can listen This is fucking great Just take them to the walk-in. The pictures. Let's go see that freezer. Said, you got Joey Betts in there? Jinx, I got a job for you. No one can know.
Starting point is 00:46:35 Who was the other guy that was there with Martin Sheen? No, I know Mikey Betts. Who was the other guy? We haven't figured it out. So you don't know who that guy is yet? Yeah, crew is expanding. Right. Because I know Mikey,
Starting point is 00:46:47 everyone knows Mikey Benz, but who's the other guy? We don't know. Interesting. Look at him. Oh, now he's like, I can't be seen with a broad. I think it's my boo mom.
Starting point is 00:47:00 Jenks, get her out of here. We said no women and kids, boss. Oh, here they come. I was told that Jenks made a sale. I've heard this. Jenks made multiple sales. A big one. A large percentage.
Starting point is 00:47:15 Yeah. I've had to tell Jenks. He kept on DMing me and was like, I made a sale. I made a sale. Like, all these sales. I was like, you got to talk to someone other than me about these sales. I think we might be getting in some issues here. I think he sold some brick watches.
Starting point is 00:47:29 Oh, he did? Like double digits, right? Here we go. Nice little park bench. But did he ever flaunt? And he just got sent on his mission. He also might be the best half-court shooter in the office. Really?
Starting point is 00:47:39 He says he made four in a row from his anus. He's sitting down. Wait, are you guys going to make four in a row? He's like 50% from sitting down. I think there's a chance we might make zero. I think there's a large from his anus. He's sitting down. Wait, are you guys going to make four in a row? He's like 50% from sitting down. I think there's a chance we might make zero collectively. I think there's a large chance. Mark will. We'll make three.
Starting point is 00:47:52 We'll make three. Hopefully. Somebody should make one. Should I? Do you want? Should it be me? You know what? Yeah, do it.
Starting point is 00:47:58 You know what? Just go ahead. You know what? Fuck it. I'll do it. I'll make one. For all of us. No, we got to make one.
Starting point is 00:48:03 Mikey Betts got summoned over. Mikey Betts and Jenks can never be seen in the same place. There's a shuffle. Otherwise, Frank. I'll do it. I'll make for all of us. No we got a man's Mikey best got summoned over Mikey Betsy Jenks can never be seen in the same place Otherwise, Frank Frank can be called Lasses for Donnie take your fucking shirt off buddy. Oh God Yes This is a tuna tartar poke bowl. Okay bowl. Oh my word Donnie what? Please please get Rone nobody. Yeah, we soon as fucking delicious. Yeah. Oh, there was one spider now
Starting point is 00:48:35 I'm okay. Thank you brother everybody this looks absolutely This is oh my god what presentation? Was it over? Thank you, Don. This is absurd. What presentation. Holy shit. What is it over a... Is that over a chemo? All right, it's now seven shots. Oh, wow. All right. All right.
Starting point is 00:48:54 Damn, that looks good, Donnie. What? Donnie, that chicken parmi made you look so fucking good. I ate it off my phone. I had like... So good. I had so much of his hummus that he made yesterday, too. I did.
Starting point is 00:49:05 You ate it off your phone? Yeah, it fell on my phone, so I licked my phone. I thought you meant like fecal matter on it, dude. That was one of the more insane videos. I don't shit on my phone. I did a scientific breakdown of how gross it was. Oh, yeah. Phones are gross.
Starting point is 00:49:18 That's fine. That chicken parm was terrific. Hey, TJ, could you, just like yesterday, we should probably just get it out of the way and spin the wheel because it's going to be a problem. I brought extra clothes today. It's going to be a problem. After that entire speech yesterday, Nick, I did not bring extra clothes. Oh, yeah, welcome back, Roan.
Starting point is 00:49:36 Now let's spin the wheel. Let's show Roan what the wheel is. Oh, God. Yeah. It's a death trap. It is really bad. We have mousetraps on the wheel now. Come on, wheel reset. That would wheel now. Come on, wheel reset.
Starting point is 00:49:45 That would be amazing. Come on, wheel reset. Dry would be fun too. Come on, wheel reset. No, we're not. No. Roni. Welcome back.
Starting point is 00:49:58 I want to get wet. God fucking damn it. Is Chef Donnie on it? Is Stu on it? Yeah. Is Max on it? Yeah. Is Max on it? Yeah. Corey.
Starting point is 00:50:05 Yeah. You're all on it. Yep. Corey. Corey. Who brought in the salad? Paige. We'll keep Paige off.
Starting point is 00:50:11 Oh. Spider. Spider. Oh, this is great. Who else? We're fucked. We're fucked. I don't have a change of clothes But if somebody hits a wet half court shot
Starting point is 00:50:28 That's like 750 right That would be incredible Damn it Yeah Bad I was shooting half court shots in 2k last night Just warming up Yeah
Starting point is 00:50:39 Ready to go Hell yes Ready to snipe And tomorrow we're going to play dodgeball After the yak Roan and I are going to announce it tomorrow we're going to play dodgeball after the Yak. Roan and I are going to announce it, and we're going to split up the teams during the Yak. Will and Taylor will be here as well.
Starting point is 00:50:50 It'll be our first big stream at the office. Very nice. KB, what did you think of my list of the 10 baddest dudes at Barstool? That was good. I think that was a very accurate list. Two people were mad at me. Who was mad? Someone that was off the list or not ranked high enough?
Starting point is 00:51:08 Off the list. Wait. Billy. Yeah, that's one. Okay, of course. Why would Billy be one of the bad... Why would Billy be badder than NFL players? I mean, Billy may be the...
Starting point is 00:51:18 Maybe if he was at the end of the list, maybe Billy over Gilly. No, let's put Gilly over Billy. And then Captain Collins also. Oh, come on. He took on Richie. If you complain about not being
Starting point is 00:51:34 on the baddest list, that means boys at barstool. That means you're a certified pussy boy. No bad boy would ever complain about not being on a bad list that's that was a great test you you you basically smoked out the pussy boys yeah honestly i really did yeah um but kb i think what i have you eight yeah that was healthy yeah
Starting point is 00:51:57 i think it's accurate yeah all right eight shots damn holy shit. Che, I just got a text that you might be in trouble. Because Paige just texted me. Paige is our office manager. Great. She just said, is Che actually in charge of parking? Sounds like you're not doing your job. No. So she sent an email yesterday.
Starting point is 00:52:18 I guess we hadn't talked about it. I hadn't talked about it with her. But before she sent the email, I showed i showed you and i showed hank that i was going to send an all-hands email later in the day uh and i sent the uh i gave the i printed out the parking stuff i gave it to yesterday danny was in and i gave it to send an email saying people need to fill it out nine shots oh my word this was such a mistake But yeah, I'll talk to her and we'll root that through. How are we going to do this? Just one after another?
Starting point is 00:52:49 I don't think you guys can shoot one. I don't think you can shoot nine in a row. No rhythm. Yeah, that's a rhythm. Right. Okay. Can we use the girls ball? No.
Starting point is 00:52:57 I think we should do rounds. Should we go in groups? Or we all go up? Yeah, we'll do rounds. Yeah, we'll do like rounds of three so we can narrate it. Yeah. I love that. So what is the parking situation?
Starting point is 00:53:08 We have a lot of spots. Brandon can't be happy with what his space is. No. No, I'm fine. You are? Yeah, I get here first. So where's your spot? Right up front.
Starting point is 00:53:18 Wow. I'm backed in right. I was here before you did. You beat me today. Yeah. You beat me today. Potential assigned spots are coming. Potential. It was a uh particularly bad uh traffic day why would assign why would assign spots what
Starting point is 00:53:31 would those help we need to figure out who's coming and when it looks like 20 there we've 25 spots 20 people have let me know that they are going to be regularly parking but the lot is full so we're trying to find out who else is regularly driving in. Well, there's a sponsor here today. You have, I don't know if Stu and the print cars. Sure, yeah, we couldn't really do this still today because Monday there was still construction people here, and then yesterday there were a bunch of advertisers. Is it weird knowing what kind of car everyone drives?
Starting point is 00:53:57 I like it. I feel like that's like seeing everyone's penis. It's a lot like seeing their dick in balls. I like knowing that detail about them. Isn't it kind of like showering with a teammate? So wait, if seeing their car is like their penis, what's seeing the interior of the car?
Starting point is 00:54:13 Their asshole. Is that like seeing their asshole? It's like looking inside their asshole. Peering into their asshole. Okay. Sorry, it's messy. Brandon, did you see my penis last night or are you joking? Whoa! Okay. Sorry, it's messy. Brandon, did you see my penis last night or are you joking? Whoa!
Starting point is 00:54:29 What? What the fuck? What? Did you see his penis last night? Or were you joking? Wait a minute. I gotta go take a picture of this for the people, but you remember the tweet he had a few months ago when he was at the airport? Ten shots. God damn it.
Starting point is 00:54:45 The tweet he had when he was at the airport where he was like, the stalls in Newark don't go all the way up, so you might be able to look at your neighbor's penis. Last night, he was in the stall, and I was coming in, and it literally goes up above my head. I said, I'm going to have to get on my tiptoes to see your dick.
Starting point is 00:55:02 And that's all I said, and he thinks I saw his dick. I don't. I just asked you if you'd seen it because it topically had come up on the show. I didn't see your penis. I did see some as I walked into the office some flyers of have you seen this and it was just a picture of your dick.
Starting point is 00:55:19 Please report if you've seen this man's penis. Missing cock. Yeah. A lot of the things were ripped off, though. Answers to Nitro. Blood type. Oh. You guys look so uncomfortable back there.
Starting point is 00:55:38 Let's do a real long show today. Let's get the boys standing. It's pretty crazy they took their chairs. Yeah, it is. I don't know why we were going live. Why do we need those chairs? It's probably what you're sitting in tonight. No, it's probably what you're sitting in.
Starting point is 00:55:50 I'm sitting in the courtside. It probably is what I'm sitting in. It's probably what you're sitting in. What's your role, Brendan, tonight? Me and Titus are hosting the Between Games show. I'm excited for Yak basketball. It could be a disaster again. I know.
Starting point is 00:56:04 Yeah. We don't have a seven-footer out there, do we? Yeah, we do. be a disaster again. I know, yeah. We don't have a seven-footer out there, do we? Yeah, we do. Yeah, we do. Oh, we do. I'm going to talk to the hut beforehand and be like, hey, man, relax. Maybe set some people up. I could take his knees out.
Starting point is 00:56:17 Take his knees out. Last time I was just screaming at him. I had that talk with him last time, and he passed me the ball. So I think that talk works. He's very bendable, but you've got to get in his ear first. He was swatting people. I was like, get the fuck off the court. We should put him in the drunk goggles.
Starting point is 00:56:35 Oh, yeah. Or tie his knees together or something. Something a little bit funny. We should harm him. We should all gang up on him. We should beat the fuck out of him. We should beat the fuck out of him. Let's beat the fuck out of him. Throw the ball in the air and then we all turn
Starting point is 00:56:47 away from the ball, just look right at him and just start beating the fuck out of him. Could we do that? Like just tackle him? Yeah, I think you should. Group tackle? Yeah. Would he be down for that? That'd be funny. No. He would freak out, right? Yeah. Let's do it. Let's fucking get this guy.
Starting point is 00:57:04 He's paid paid he already got paid i'll take a leg i forgot one of us had to get wet oh let's just figure out hey let's get it there it is shower room upstairs 11 shots the water doesn't work and also there's no audio but we do have a shower um that's not a shower wait the water doesn't work? Yep. So that's not a shower? Correct. It doesn't turn on at all? Also, is there a camera inside the shower? Wait a minute. Yeah, I didn't even think about that.
Starting point is 00:57:32 Wait a goddamn second. Good point, KP. I could have accidentally used that. Wait, I didn't realize. What is capturing that? This is super illegal Here comes it's very good group. They're walking by again Yeah, here. They are don't make eye contact
Starting point is 00:57:57 Have audio just given us oh shit the freaking sales team can't do shit. I need to go break some legs on the second floor. These motherfuckers don't know what they have. Mikey Betts, I need a play tonight. Titus, can I ask you a greedy favor? What's up? I love the impressions of Nick and KB so much. I thought they were so funny, but my one gripe with the video is that when you do the Nick impression,
Starting point is 00:58:29 it cut away from your face. And your face when you did the KB impression was so like KB's face. I just want to see if you got a... It was like where the word came from. It was like, no. You like put a T-H on the no. No, you're putting it on the spot. No.
Starting point is 00:58:47 Yeah, because KB, if I remember right, I got to get back in there. I said I was going to retire the impressions. I know. That's why I said it. I knew it was a greedy. I will do it for you, Roan, because I love you. But if I remember right, like, KB was like a, yeah. It, like, dawns on him
Starting point is 00:59:08 You can see the impression as like the sun Comes up on his realization You're like KB Was wrestling hard in college And he's like Yeah He's like digging it through He's like oh god he's pissed
Starting point is 00:59:23 Yeah that is that pause is like me Trying to can I make this like goofy He's like thinking it through. He's like, oh, God, he's pissed. Yeah, that pause is like me trying to, can I make this goofy? Yeah. I have to settle for yeah. Yeah. All right. And then Nick is. Oh, man. I don't like looking at him.
Starting point is 00:59:41 Yeah, you can't look at him. Nick, did you go to prom in high school? No. Oh, man. No. No. It's unbelievable. That's all I got, by the way, is one word.
Starting point is 01:00:01 That's the only thing I can do with you. I couldn't do no for you and yes for him. It that that's it's unbelievable i could tell you like studied us incredible watch the tape yeah that shit killed me but that's uh that's a that's a sign of respect that i watch a lot of anus of course yeah no i love i pick up on the mannerisms yeah thank you um i consume a lot of your content. Nice form of flattery. Thank you. Perfect imitation. So good.
Starting point is 01:00:29 Are you naturally, like, is it naturally, are you good at impressions? I'm not, I don't think I'm good at impressions, but I am good at picking up people's, like, tics and their little things.
Starting point is 01:00:38 I can't necessarily mimic all of them, but I can pick up. Yeah, Brandon's, you'd have to change your skin color. You'd have to go pink at times. Yeah, which is why, honestly, I don't like watching myself back. I can't watch my own shit. Because every time I do, I just notice my own little tics.
Starting point is 01:00:55 It drives me crazy. That is tough. But you used it for good. You used it for good. Use your power for good. That's a big body boss man move right there. I'm sorry, guys. No, that was huge.
Starting point is 01:01:10 That was good for me. Yeah. And it wasn't like, I'm KB. I'm a fucking idiot. Yeah, that's true. I'm literally saying one word. There's no negative connotation. But you say it perfectly.
Starting point is 01:01:22 It's crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy. Figure out who's getting wet, because this is stressing me the fuck out. Yeah, wait, do the high noon ad reading, and let's figure out who's getting wet. Roan, for old time's sake, buddy. Where is it? I don't hear. Oh, 12 shots.
Starting point is 01:01:38 12? Let's go. 12 shots sounds like fucking the perfect distribution of a high noon can. And 12 ounces of absolute fire. King. I've seen the Dave packs that he's thrown around. Oh, my word. That stuff looks absolutely delicious.
Starting point is 01:01:56 But there's also the limited edition fan faves. Yes, that's right. Cranberry, which if you like a seasonal drink, which I do, I want my drink to feel like the outside. This is the time of the year to be having the cranberry. I would take a pair of cranberries. We should go to a bog. And I get what you mean a second later with a pair of cranberries. Because pear is also one of the autumnal flavors.
Starting point is 01:02:15 Accidental. And they're damn good. See, he's like that. He has it like that. And there's no added sugar. Obviously, it's gluten-free. And anytime I can get my grubby hands on a high noon, you know I'm diving headfirst into a pool pack, party pack, whatever type of pack you got.
Starting point is 01:02:33 Don't look at me. I'm going to have some high noons, and I don't care who knows it. Highnoonspirits.com. Before your next tailgate, you can find a pack near you. High noon. Get some. Enjoy some.
Starting point is 01:02:45 Maybe a paper airplane for old time's sake. See if I still got it. High noon. What's been going on in New York? Oh, dude. It's fucking crazy. See, your ankles are flexible as hell. I've been on a plie.
Starting point is 01:02:59 What the fuck is that? That's second position, bro. Dude, it's crazy. Glennie Balls is gay now. What? Yeah. Glennie Balls went gay. And it's cool.
Starting point is 01:03:10 Everyone's cool with it. And no, no. Yeah, no. Everybody is very cool with Glennie Balls being gay now. Which, I guess especially the OnlyFans girls. They want to show him the boobs even more now. Yeah. That they know he's gay.
Starting point is 01:03:24 What is the direction of the OnlyFans show? I think like 12 to midnight He's like picking up the pace He's crushing it 6 to midnight Fuck Oh 12 to midnight Now you die
Starting point is 01:03:39 Do it again I'm still laughing What's the direction? What is the direction of the OnlyFans show? I'd say 6 to midnight. I only listen to the podcast version of the show. I'm sick. You could pick up more.
Starting point is 01:03:56 Yeah. Yeah, I think it's going good. I don't know. I think he doesn't have a ton of like support help with it but I don't think he needs a lot who Glennie's gay ass? he doesn't need a lot of support help no not anymore
Starting point is 01:04:12 it's just you know his sassy ass can figure it out himself any other people come out? who has come out? Pat went the other way who's the last person to come out? who's the last big come out? Pat went the other way. Who's the last person to come out? Who's the last big come out? Wayne Brady.
Starting point is 01:04:29 What? Wayne Brady. Pansexual. What? Wayne Brady came out? Wayne Brady came out? Pansexual. What's pansexual?
Starting point is 01:04:36 Everybody. You'll fuck anything. Guys, girls, days. Any hole. Any hole. Guys or girls or days. Yeah, any hole will do. Pansexual is a thing?
Starting point is 01:04:44 Yeah. Wayne Brady, huh? Yeah, he did it in like a... I they's. Yeah, any hole will do. Pansexuals, I think? Yeah. Wayne Brady, huh? Yeah, he did it in like a... I don't think a lot of people that saw his video even realized that it was a coming out video. He was just like kind of singing it at the end. That sounds like it's a coming out video. He's been on that shit. Oh, this isn't a coming out video.
Starting point is 01:04:58 He was just singing a show tune. Did Wayne Brady get in trouble for something? You're thinking of the Chappelle Show skit. Yeah, he shot up some people. Wayne Brady choke a bitch? Yeah. No. He is sassy as fuck.
Starting point is 01:05:08 That wasn't based on a real story? No, I don't think he was a pimp at any time. He might have been. When I did that battle rap show, he came on one of the times and was like, he completely came at the dude who ran the show, Jensen, over like a freestyle. And he was like freestyle like battling the producer of the show and just like embarrassing him in front of the crowd. Being like just talking shit on him for like no reason. Was it good though?
Starting point is 01:05:37 It wasn't great, but it was just – it was more mean than any – it was just so mean. I just couldn't believe a celebrity was just being really mean. So he just insulted him in like a musical form. Yeah, yeah. Which is – that's gay as hell. Just like very catty. That's kind celebrity was just being really mean. Yeah, yeah. Which is gay. That's gay as hell. Just like very catty. That's kind of Lin-Manuel Miranda. Yeah. He did come out as pansexual. Wow.
Starting point is 01:05:52 Congrats, Wayne. Yeah, congrats, brother. Oh, I mean, you don't need the sound. Oh, hey, Jack. There was a lot of comments that were like, lol, good one, Wayne. Look at his skin. What the hell? Oh, he likes... Oh.
Starting point is 01:06:06 Oh. Oh, he's real Hollywood. Oh, yeah. How is this confusing at all? This is a Pfizer commercial. It looks like a strict teacher. How is this confusing? Yeah, that was the least confusing coming out video ever.
Starting point is 01:06:25 Yeah. He could post a video of him fucking a man, and I'd have less questions. I think it was just a bit. More questions. I think it was just a joke that he was fucking a guy. Yeah. Yeah. Who's getting wet, though? Who's getting wet?
Starting point is 01:06:39 God damn it. Tickets are for sale for the Barstool Comedy Night here Yes At Laugh Factory Yes November 30th 8pm Nicky hosting It's gonna be sick
Starting point is 01:06:51 It'll be a good time One show One show Alright Everyone buy Yeah there's already a lot of tickets sold So I would Love that
Starting point is 01:06:57 What was your game plan when you hosted Call Me Make-A-Wish Yeah call pretty much be like The only reason I'm doing this is a MOOC. It's funny. Yeah. You had a good Kramer joke. You did.
Starting point is 01:07:09 Oh, yeah. It's like, everyone's going to come host it. You know, Brandon will do it. Nick, want on Don. And then I look back at the Laugh Factory. I was like, maybe not Mincy. Yeah. That's funny.
Starting point is 01:07:21 The Q&A was fun. Yeah. I mean, it's also like when it's our audience going to a show it's a cheat code because i could say i was like bears suck which i love i like that's like it's nice because people just want to see us yeah they actually had to do comedy i could just show up and just be like hey guys yeah how long did you go for and how what was your how could you tell the passing of time it was like i did like maybe three to five minutes to open the show then introduced everyone then at the end we did like maybe 10 15 minutes of q a do you give them a light mook could you be like five minutes i'll
Starting point is 01:07:54 let the boy go oh yeah yeah you're gonna do an hour up there i would have been yeah yeah i think it was like five minutes and i go for like 30 seconds. Yeah. That's weird. Well, dude, the bet that we have on PMT is going to be a disaster for Super Bowl week. Oh, yeah. That's going to be incredible. Someone has to do a one-man show. Me, Hank, or PFT, we have to do an hour. Holy shit. That is absurd.
Starting point is 01:08:18 That's a lot. No Q&A. Can only play one song because we didn't want PFT to just rip guitar the whole time. You should memorize a movie. I think I just do magic. You should do crowd work with every single person there. Point at them individually
Starting point is 01:08:33 and be like, where are you from? Yeah. What do you do for work? What do you do for work? And then like, all right, cool. So where are you from?
Starting point is 01:08:39 Name riff the whole time. The entire crowd. You're guaranteed crowd work at a show. That's awesome. You just repeat their answer back to them in a snarky cadence. Oh, your name's Bob? Minnesota.
Starting point is 01:08:51 Oh, I didn't know Minnesota was here. Cool. I really think that could work. It could fill out the time. Brandon, you good? Yeah. Sure? Is it the poke? Is it the poke?
Starting point is 01:09:05 Was it the poke? No, I don't think so. You look fussy. I'm fine. You do look fussy. I haven't fussed at all. I'm a little sleep deprived. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:09:13 You're going to be sleeping like a baby tonight. Very, very sleep deprived. How's your new house, Brandon? I feel like... It's beautiful. Yeah? Yeah. I have good neighbors.
Starting point is 01:09:21 Just took the boat out. Getting ready for the winter. Going to have a... I'm going to buy a hockey net. Going to skate out getting ready for the winter gonna have a I'm gonna buy a nice hockey net skate out there for the boy for the boys ice fishing I got the the owner of the house left me one oh no he's living his life living my life man haven't I found a pizza place my school football team made the playoffs everything's good it is a long commute though
Starting point is 01:09:46 so when you move to Chicago I wouldn't live out there yeah but you could we could carpool yeah me and you I'm more of a Wilmette guy
Starting point is 01:09:53 yeah get up there I don't think we have anyone up there I mean Jerry's dealing with the traffic the Arlington Heights did you see the video today
Starting point is 01:10:00 Jerry he freaks out better than anyone yeah it was good he's good he just freaks out like he just. Yeah, it was good. He just freaks out. He's so good at going from zero calm to just, like, this guy might have a
Starting point is 01:10:11 problem. Because he does have a problem. There's nothing! Nothing! 35 minutes! Stock and park! And park! I'm stuck in park! In park! I don't care, it doesn't matter what time you leave. That's perfect.
Starting point is 01:10:37 Dude, this is so relatable. That's how you go down. This is so relatable. This is what's going on in my head during traffic. We did point out to him because he was late to advisors, and Dave was like, train? And he's like, yeah, I haven't tried the train. There is a train right by his house.
Starting point is 01:10:54 Oh, really? That's not him, though. Yeah, it's a tough break. He's a come and go as you please type of guy. He's not trying to be a vagabond. Train schedule. Yeah, that little whimper cry. That is the most relatable traffic cry where you're just like, oh, just let me out.
Starting point is 01:11:12 That's like any activity, like putting together a table or like trying to set up your cable or like just trying anything. I didn't mean to do that. Sit at a bar real quick. Someone help me. I figure out who's getting wet. Oh, yeah. We got a lot of shots to take, too.
Starting point is 01:11:27 A lot of shots. I think, yeah, maybe at 1.30 we'll start with 12 shots right now. Oh, Jesus. It's not going to be any of us. I am so not worried right now. This is incredible. Oh, I think it's me. There you go, Brandon.
Starting point is 01:11:51 Oh, that's nice. That's what you get for being fussy. I wasn't. I fussed. 50 on red or black. 50 on red or black slice. What? No one took it. No one took it. So how are we getting wet? Shower that doesn't work?
Starting point is 01:12:12 Sit. Sit. Moog. Sit. Dry as a bone, Moogie. Big body Moog. Now I'm worried. No. Oh, way too early. When did you become a pussy? Because we have so much shit today. When did you become a little pussy? Because we have so much shit today. When did you become a little pussy? Because we have so much shit today.
Starting point is 01:12:27 This is still more than one. Dry ass, Mark. Yeah. Is that the first time you've gone out this early? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. If there's justice, it will be me. For what?
Starting point is 01:12:39 Coming back to the show. Keep going. Keep going. It's owned by Max. It's you. Again. Keep going. It's owned by Max. Again. I know. This has me and Big Cat Final 2 written all over it. I wouldn't be worried if it wasn't for the fact
Starting point is 01:12:53 that we have a fucking basketball tournament We're going to go. I was never worried. I was never worried. You guys fell for the trick. Oh man, you guys should see your face right now. He looks so stupid.
Starting point is 01:13:07 If you get shut out. There you go. That was Dwayne and LeBron. Yes, yes. Why are we even worried? It's 100% going to be road. Yeah. Like this is.
Starting point is 01:13:18 The wheel knows. Mook is rooting for Donnie. There's a little bit of justice in the world. Let's get Donnie wet, guys. Let's get Donnie wet. guys. No, this is... I'm sorry, but this was going to be you. I knew... I want it.
Starting point is 01:13:31 But I'm going to need you boys to act. No! Fuck! I'm going to need you boys to piss on me, though. KB, how you feeling? Well, pissing is an option. Oh, I pissed myself. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:41 I'm ready. Get a job at a Japanese cafe. Piss myself. There you go, Ro. My boy. Slim body, boss man. Staying dry. Don't do it.
Starting point is 01:13:57 My boy. And we got rid of all the whites. Oh, man. I think we can all say we're rooting very hard for Zaha here. Boy, are we. I think the whole chat is. First to four is safe. Look at it.
Starting point is 01:14:23 All right, Zaha. There you go, Zaha. All right, Zaha. All right, Z all right let's go all right there we go all right two oh two oh 13 shots. Wow. Yeah. We're going to go to 130. We're going to go to 130. Thank you, everyone.
Starting point is 01:14:51 So please buy. 130 is the cutoff. You can still buy the rest of the day. They are delicious. What's the score right now? 2-2. 2-2. I hate this.
Starting point is 01:15:03 Now we got it. We got it. Oh, no. Zog. Keep the faith, Zog. 2-0 lead. 2-0 lead. Gone like that. Going back home.
Starting point is 01:15:22 Okay. There we go, Zog. Shit, shit. You're good. You're good. You're good. All right. Come on, Zog. Come on, Za. Come on, Za. Come on, Za. We need you, Za.
Starting point is 01:15:31 This is it. This is it. No. Oh, no. Oh, Che's going to black power fist. There he goes. Yeah, where do we go it's so the water doesn't work oh sure are you sure the water doesn't work
Starting point is 01:15:52 Connor's got bottle positive Oh bottles all right maybe out front just do it in Yeah, good call. Duh. Duh. Damn. That sucks for Zaha. That's not right. Oh, damn. My boy. No chair. All right, so everyone gets 13 shots now.
Starting point is 01:16:17 That's a lot of shots. That's a lot of shots. And you make one and it's done. No. So you can... If you go 13 for 13 you would win exactly that amount of money where am i shooting from you shoot a little bit back the green line yeah okay the other green line like the one that's still kind of by half court not the no no no yeah okay the other one have you guys played volleyball and pickleball yet
Starting point is 01:16:42 are that what are those what the other lines are for? Yeah, they broke it out the first day and then I don't even know where they put it. What about badminton? I don't think that's here. We could get a badminton set. How is this allowed? This looks like a lively video. It does look like a lively video.
Starting point is 01:17:00 This is like a horror movie. I will also give it a horror movie. It looks like they're about to drop an animal in there to fight Zod. Oh, yeah. Oh, he's getting his arms. In a real way. Oh, yeah. Uh-oh.
Starting point is 01:17:16 That's the rules. That's the rules. I like those jeans on Zod. Yeah. It looks good. And Zod, of course, with the promo we're doing today, wearing a black rifle coffee cup. What the fuck? What the fuck?
Starting point is 01:17:32 Throw that shirt out, Zah. God damn it. No, those guys are cool. Him having it under his shirt. He's so funny. He's so perfect. I will give – I'm thinking about it. If anyone doesn't want to take a half-court shot, I might do –
Starting point is 01:17:52 if you go 9 for 10 from the free throw line, you can win two grand. Is that a good – Oh, that's impossible. Okay, is that harder? Yes. Than to make one three or one half? I'm thinking about it. 9 for 10? Brandon, you about it. Nine for ten?
Starting point is 01:18:05 Brandon, you definitely couldn't go eight for ten. I shoot 20 free throws every day. And how many do you make? 18 every single time? I went 17 for 20 the other day. I went 15 for 20. I went 16 for 20. I'm all around it.
Starting point is 01:18:16 I'm all around it. But now the bright lights are on. You're right. I don't think making— And I've been nothing but a failure on yak passes. Four half-court shots is a lot. But making nine or ten free throws doesn't compare to making one half-court shot. Just one shot and it goes in.
Starting point is 01:18:32 But it's 500 versus 2,000. Let's get him. Steven, can you go to the front and get him a Stella Blue shirt, a dry one? Is that a Stella Blue one? Is that a Stella Blue shirt? Get him a Stella Blue shirt. Let's get him, yeah Yeah I think in the front Shit
Starting point is 01:18:46 Sorry Yeah Let's get him Let's get him that still blue shirt No it's alright Zaha You're the one person I won't be mad at Sorry my bad
Starting point is 01:18:54 It was under So I had a hoodie on I just didn't even realize It's okay Zaha You don't have to apologize Crazy man You're crazy It's more funny than anything
Starting point is 01:19:01 You're crazy And damn Does this coffee smell good So good It tastes better Tastes better I haven't tasted this blend yet It's more funny than anything. You're crazy. And damn, does this coffee smell good. So good. It tastes better. I haven't tasted this blend yet. 100% Arabica?
Starting point is 01:19:12 Don't Bogart the beans, man. Bogart the beans. I'm a boy, get a fucking little whiff. A little nose taste of that. Actually, Brandon, can I have that? Can I get a hit? A brew of course. So I think the three of you will go up first. And you can't shoot back to back. All right. And then the three of you will go up first, and you can't shoot back-to-back.
Starting point is 01:19:25 Right. All right. And then the three of you guys will go. So they're going three of them for three shots? Yeah. No, no, no. They'll do all their shots. They'll do all of them.
Starting point is 01:19:33 Yeah. What's the status of our fantasy football league? Oh, good question. Yeah, I don't give a fuck. Not a bad question. Who cares? Good question. I just know that I want to wheel for some merch bonus, and I put it back into that.
Starting point is 01:19:47 I drafted for you, too, Roan. Did you? So if we win, then we get that money back. Well, and also, Kate and Nick traded full teams because of the wheel, and Kate's in last place. Well, she was. When's the last time we checked? I don't know. No, Che's in dead last.
Starting point is 01:20:01 Oh, really? Che will, like, when we're watching football on a Sunday, he'll be like, dude. Like, what's the Eagles kicker's name? Jake Elliott. Jake Elliott. I'm like, what? And he's like, your fantasy team. I'm like, what?
Starting point is 01:20:14 He just made a 25-yarder. That's 1,000 points. You're like, oh, okay. Oh, damn, that's funny. Are you feeling good about the Eagles? Am I allowed? Yeah. For sure. KB, that's funny. Are you feeling good about the Eagles? Am I allowed? Yeah, for sure. KB, yeah?
Starting point is 01:20:29 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A little worried about the secondary, though? I'm worried. I mean, I'm very worried about the secondary. It doesn't look like they could stop anything right now. By we came at a good time.
Starting point is 01:20:42 By we came at a good time. But they have a gauntlet of a schedule. Gauntlet. They got Chiefs, Bills, 49ers, Cowboys again, and Seahawks. Seahawks are phony. Seahawks are phony. I don't think so. Same with the Niners.
Starting point is 01:20:59 I think the Niners are frauds. I think my Ravens are the most complete team. 18-1. That's my preseason pick to win the Super Bowl. That was a great preseason pick. Your Ravens look great with that diabetic tight end. Yeah, Mark Andrews. I didn't know that. He's diabetic.
Starting point is 01:21:13 I didn't know it until today. Is that when you found out? I found out today. He has to check his blood levels after he comes off every time. And he wears some shit. Yeah. I love your receivers. The Eagles? Yeah. Not just one of them. You love all of them. Yeah. I love your receivers. The Eagles? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:21:28 Not just one of them. You love all of them. AJ Brown is the most entertaining player. I love him. He's going to break records this year. Yeah. Eagles records, at least. Yeah. Oh, he's from Starkville.
Starting point is 01:21:37 Yeah. But he didn't go. Oh, so you don't miss. We've talked about this. Yeah. That's fine. Wait. Is he a traitor to you?
Starting point is 01:21:46 Mm-hmm. I absolutely fucking hate him. Oh. Yeah. Why? Because he's so handsome, chiseled, and winning? No, he's rich beyond belief, but I do not like him because he went to them. Who do you like?
Starting point is 01:21:58 If you had to like one person affiliated with Ole Miss? Ben Mintz? Lane Kiffin's a likable guy. Okay. He's a likable guy. It. He's a likable guy. It's hard to hate him. No. Fuck him.
Starting point is 01:22:09 Lane Kiffin's a likable guy. Okay. Yeah. Steven, do you have our fantasy update? Here it is. Oh, big cat. Yeah, that's Jake Elliott, I guess. And I think I've been starting Justin Fields.
Starting point is 01:22:21 Have I been? No. Nope. I believe you dropped him for Goff. Yeah, that's right. Okay, yeah. I made my one switch. So Kate's really made a comeback.
Starting point is 01:22:28 It's bottom four as in? Bottom four as in like a losing bracket. Who's your VP of football operations? Yes. So that needs to change. Can you go over to point scored? It's fantasy football. I can do whatever I want.
Starting point is 01:22:42 No, but you're not VP of football. I guess it is fantasy. It is fantasy. It is your you're not VP of football. I guess it is fantasy. It is your fantasy to be VP of football operations. Like he's in The Sims. I wish you were here for Data Day, Rowan. I think I texted you right after. That was the one time that I was like, well, many times,
Starting point is 01:22:57 but that was especially. He just literally didn't count for ten games. Oh, it was ten games? Ten games off. Five games. It doesn't make it better. That were unscheduled. Unscheduled games?
Starting point is 01:23:10 What does that mean? He claims that. I don't know. Very weird loophole. Loophole. Damn. I miss it. I miss you boys.
Starting point is 01:23:20 I miss you boys like my fucking brothers. Damn. And Sister Kate. When's Sister Kate getting back? I think, what's maternity? Four months? Four months, yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:29 Four months. Good for her. Yeah. That was a pretty good show. She could just, what was maternity? Sister Kate. That was a show? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:23:37 It was a show that ran about nine episodes on NBC in 1989. Nine episodes? How did that end? Don't know. She canceled it. She killed herself? Yeah. She killed herself. She killed herself. She killed herself. She was gay.
Starting point is 01:23:47 She killed the gay guy next door. She was a nun. Lesbian nun. She was a nun and she, just some wacky orphans. Yeah, there you go, 1989. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 01:23:55 Wayne Brady was pansexual, wasn't he? How do you know this? I remember it. I watched every episode. Freddie's bad habit. What was Eugene's secret? And Eugene's feet, too?
Starting point is 01:24:07 Oh, 19 episodes. Oh, 19. I'm sorry. I had a number wrong. Damn. Rob and Fab were on there. Where were you in your life in 89? I was in the fifth grade.
Starting point is 01:24:18 I was in the fifth grade. And I only had three channels, so I watched every episode of every NBC sitcom. Interesting. Big fan, yeah. The dial? Yeah. The TV? That was so annoying. channels so i watched every episode of every nbc sitcom interesting big fan yeah the dial yeah the tv that was so annoying i had four nine and 27 those were my three those were so annoying until dad sold the tv for drugs yeah yeah yeah yeah he actually didn't sell it uh he had the wrong friend over and the friend stole it oh okay and then tomm then Tommy, the next-door neighbor, knew about the friend, and that's when Tommy and my dad got my dad's.410 shotgun,
Starting point is 01:24:48 and they just scared him. They didn't do anything to him. Got the TV back, though? No. Oh. But he never did it again. Also incorrect. Wait, no way.
Starting point is 01:24:58 What else did he steal? Oh, buddy. Buddy. So, wait, was everybody in your neighborhood? Oh, we had big drug parties down at Truman Creek Road. Yeah, a lot of stealing. That was probably really fun for them. It really was.
Starting point is 01:25:13 I remember going to sleep at 9 o'clock on Friday night, and you never knew what time you'd be woken up. Were people hollering at all hours? They were hollering, yeah. Shooting guns, like stuff on fire? Hooting and hollering. So now when you look at your new neighbors, you said you have good neighbors. What was the mark of that?
Starting point is 01:25:29 Did they bring you over some cookies or lasagna? They brought me a lot of pizza. Good pizza in my neighborhood. Yeah. Antioch Pizza, you should try it. I'll bring you some. Thank you. Tomorrow?
Starting point is 01:25:40 Oh, no, you're staying over at Nick's. I'm staying at Nick's. So when am I going to? We're having a spend-the-night party. Call it a sleepover. It's going to be some? We're having a spend-the-night party. Call it a sleepover. It's going to be some time before. I like spend-the-night party. He's going to do some fun stuff.
Starting point is 01:25:50 Yeah. Tickle fight? Yeah. Did you pack a bag? I did. Yeah. Overnight bag? I did.
Starting point is 01:25:56 Nice. I love that. Which I only have one bag, and it's a very large suitcase. For one night, so everyone's like, oh. It's this tall, yeah. Seems like you're moving in. Yeah. But I got all my, I don't know what I was going to wear tonight for the show, so I brought For one night So everyone's like Oh It's this tall Yeah Seems like you're moving in Yeah But I got all my
Starting point is 01:26:05 I don't know what I was Going to wear tonight For the show So I brought all my Suit jackets Yeah I brought a lot of Suit jackets I didn't fit into my
Starting point is 01:26:12 Suit so I'm not wearing one You're wearing suit jackets I brought like three Just in case I brought some Mississippi State clothes I thought we talked About what we were wearing
Starting point is 01:26:18 We're going to wear that If it doesn't work Did he pivot last minute Like an asshole Why would it not work Because the shirts Didn't come in until One hour ago
Starting point is 01:26:24 Right I was scared It wasn't going to happen You have to have a backup I was just going to Wear this That would be the He pivoted last minute like an asshole. Why would it not work? Because the shirt didn't come in until one hour ago. Right. I was scared it wasn't going to happen. You have to have a backup. I was just going to wear this. That would be the backup. Okay, well, that's your backup. But this isn't the backup.
Starting point is 01:26:33 This is what I'm wearing. I'm just wearing it. I plan for a backup. Okay. I plan for a backup. I don't like the idea of you planning to kind of one-up me. I wasn't planning to one-up you. I was idea of, like, I was going to wear this. You're going to show up in a suit and tie. You guys are a married couple.
Starting point is 01:26:48 Mincy, you're playing GIAC basketball tonight, right? All right. Cool. Awesome. Cool. Cool. Cool. Thanks.
Starting point is 01:26:57 It's the middle in between. No, halftime of the first game. Is it shot time? Yeah. 15. 15 is the official final. Let's go. The branding on 15. 15 is the official final. Let's go.
Starting point is 01:27:06 The branding on the... 15 shots. We had branding on the sales table yesterday. Rony, you were on the culture flyer. Oh, my God. Che was on the comedy flyer. Yeah. What was on the main flyer? So there were a bunch of faces.
Starting point is 01:27:18 All the big shots. And imposed behind the faces were just the logos of each individual show. You know, Yak, a million dollars worth of game, Bustin' with the Boys, all the logos. And Rasslin' made the fucking flyer. Rasslin' was on the flyer. Wait, what? Oh, no. Rasslin' made it.
Starting point is 01:27:35 So that means they have to bring it back, correct? No. Why not? It was a mistake. To the advertisers? So we're lying to advertisers now. That's what we're doing? Yes.
Starting point is 01:27:43 Okay. You're saying if it's on the menu, the kitchen's got to make it. I think so. Otherwise, it's false advertising. Sorry, sir. We are out of that. We are out of wrestling. 86 wrestling. Sorry, we ain't got no more wrestling. Are you going to go to the EW event
Starting point is 01:27:57 Thanksgiving week? Of course. I might go. I want to go. Why would you go? Why are you going? You want to go? Tony invited me. Oh, yeah, you'll go. Brandon, can I. Why would you go? Why are you going? You want to go? Well, Tony invited me. Oh, yeah, you'll go. Brandon, can I come? Of course. Cool.
Starting point is 01:28:07 So, when's the day before? So, I've got somebody coming in tomorrow from AEW. Oh, nice. Yeah. We had an advertiser come up to us. Kyle was there. He came up to me and Mook. He was like, hey, man, we loved Anus when you guys called one of your sponsors Feel Dicks Gay.
Starting point is 01:28:23 And he was like, that was so funny. Everybody on our team loved it. I was like, thanks, man. He was like, we could never sponsor you guys and then walked away. I appreciated the honesty, though. Damn. Feels good, yeah.
Starting point is 01:28:34 What are you guys going to do for Thanksgiving this year? Go back to wheeling? No, I'm staying here. I might stay. So maybe we'll do a yak on Wednesday, although I don't want to make people stay. I've got to do something. We're going to Florida.
Starting point is 01:28:45 I have to host Ben Mintz at my house. Well, you don't have to. You offered that. No, no. Oh, yeah, that's true. You're right. For Thanksgiving, I'm having Ben Mintz over, and then we're streaming the Egg Bowl in my house.
Starting point is 01:28:59 Oh, my God. And we're going to lose that game. Whose idea was this? It was mine and Jack McCarthy's because we got some things going on for Thanksgiving. But we're going to do it at my house in my basement. And he's going to – Ben Mitz is going to humiliate me in my own house. He's going to shit in your house. No, he's not allowed to shit.
Starting point is 01:29:14 He's going to shit in your house. He's not allowed to shit. He's going to shit. It doesn't matter whether he's allowed to or not. He's going to shit in your house. He's going to shit. He's going to – Best shitting day of the year.
Starting point is 01:29:21 You eat Thanksgiving at like 11 a.m. He might even – He's going to shit. He's going to track mud in as well. Yeah, he's going to pull the – Yeah,m. He's going to track mud in as well. Yeah, he's going to pull the rug. Well, he's only going to the basement. He's not going to see the house. There's going to be footprints everywhere.
Starting point is 01:29:32 He's not going to see the house proper. He's only going to be in the basement. You're not letting him in the house for Thanksgiving? No, you don't let him. He's an outside cat. You don't let a dog like that in. You've got to let him in. I'll walk him around to the back and he can come in.
Starting point is 01:29:44 So how are you filming it? And are you having Thanksgiving dinner in the basement? No, I'll bring him down a plate. So what are you going to bring him down a plate? He's going to bring him down a plate. He's going to shit in your place. And what producer is going to come to your house on Thanksgiving and shoot? I don't know.
Starting point is 01:29:57 I haven't been told what producer is coming. I'll produce it. Somebody's coming. By the way, there's a chance we might go to Michigan or Ohio State now. Okay. That'd be fun. Yeah. What happens when Penn State beats Michigan, though?
Starting point is 01:30:08 Is that even worth it? That's the part of it. That's happening. Oh. I think so. Oh. A lot of distractions. Don't you say that, though.
Starting point is 01:30:16 Why won't you take my love? Because whenever you talk about Penn State good, bad things happen at Penn State. They've lost one game. Yeah, and it's because you beat the drum so hard. They lost one game on the road to a good team. But you were beating the drum for them from the beginning of the season. Sorry for believing in you. I'm sorry. My bad. He does this to everybody.
Starting point is 01:30:32 Your belief is... I'm sorry for believing in you guys too. Thank you. Apology accepted. How did you believe in both of us? We played against each other week one. What the fuck? I believed in you for that one. No, you didn't. I believed y'all could keep it close. You thought they'd win. You thought they'd pull the upset. No, I didn't. I believe y'all can keep it close. You thought they'd win. You thought they'd pull the upset. No, I didn't.
Starting point is 01:30:46 I know. Okay. I want to take a shot. All right, let's go. You guys want to go first? No, you guys can go first. Brandon, Nick, and Roan, go. Yeah, you guys go.
Starting point is 01:30:56 You guys go. You're chomping at the bit. You're chomping at the bit. Yeah, get out there. Go ahead. All right, so 15 is the first. 15 shots. All 15.
Starting point is 01:31:09 You can't take consecutive shots. I don't like that number because that's the number where it's embarrassing if you don't get one. It is a little embarrassing if you don't get one. Yeah. You want me to board? Use the men's ball, not the women's ball. There's a rack over there, too. Use the one signed by...
Starting point is 01:31:30 All right. Yeah, sure. Che will board. Where's he going? We good? Yeah, we're good. Wait, wait. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:44 Okay. And I will... I'm just going to say it right now. I will be watching for foot on the line. I think that's fair. Small court. Yeah, of course. Foot on the line and it doesn't count.
Starting point is 01:31:58 That would be a shame. Yak chat, I want you to have my back. If you see foot on the line, please report. Oh. Oh, no. 0 for 1. That did hit the light. 0 for 1.
Starting point is 01:32:15 0 for 1. You should have to pay you 500. Yeah. My shot's going to be electric if this gets... That was a good dream shot. Brandon, his first shot. 0 for 1. Finding the range. Rone.
Starting point is 01:32:33 Rone. He's changing his shoes. He had boots on. Nicky. Nick. Hit the light again. Hit the light again. Oh, no, Nicky. Nicky, Nicky, Nicky. the light again. Hit the light again. Oh no, Nicky.
Starting point is 01:32:47 Nicky, Nicky, Nicky. 0 for 2. Oh! Alright, I gotta... Realize the light's there? Yeah. Roan's first shot. Brandon and Nick are both 0 for 2. Okay. Find in range.
Starting point is 01:33:07 Titus, what are you seeing so far? Good form? Yeah, Brandon. Oh, foot on the line. Brandon seems to have the best shot, obviously. Ronan, I'm counting foot on the line. All right. Nick, 0 for 3.
Starting point is 01:33:23 Come on, boys. Brandon's going to hit one. Brandon will hit multiple, I think. Oh. I think Brandon will hit at least two. But also, Brandon, it kind of feels like Brandon might also get very close 10 times. Oh, light. Brandon, I'll give you the $2,000 free throw deal right now.
Starting point is 01:33:41 How many are we shooting at a time? All of them or three each? No, all of them. Oh. So that's three each? Three each. They've all taken three. Nick, can you hit the light? No. This is bad, guys. 15, KB, you're right.
Starting point is 01:33:55 15's a bad number. Nick's doing shot put. Brandon seems to be the only prayer out of this group as of right now. Unless Roan gets locked in. Roan's got to get locked in. Roan's going to hit one. Yeah, Nick is.
Starting point is 01:34:08 Yeah, Roan will hit one. Roan will hit one. Okay. Roan will hit one. Four. That was four. Tell Brandon that that didn't go in. He thinks it went in.
Starting point is 01:34:15 No, he knows. There's no. Not even close. That did not go in. Wait, you. What? Brandon, Brandon. You thought that went in?
Starting point is 01:34:24 There it is. There it is. What number are number they are can someone count five this is five Branders get tired now now. He's got a hit oh All right, this is six six come on someone's got to hit one Road oh Oh fuck seven seventh round no Nicky no no TJ, is there a way for us to give money to the Yak Chat? Gift cards, you said, or something? Yeah. All right, so if I...
Starting point is 01:35:35 I guess explain the premises, and I'll tell you what's wrong. If I hit my shot, and I get all the money back, whatever I was going to give, I will figure out a way to give away to the Yak Chat. So that money is not back to me. It's just we'll do gift cards or figure it out. So I want the Yak Chat to know that. They should root for me.
Starting point is 01:35:56 They should root for everyone now, and then they should root for me. This is sad. This is starting to become sad. This is eight. All right. Ninth right, nice make one This is bad guys red is on it. This is bad, guys. Brandon's on it.
Starting point is 01:36:29 This is bad. Come on, Ron. So the Yak Chat should be rooting for these guys right now. Ron has 500 bucks. There we go, Ron. Wow. 500 bucks. 500 for Ron. All right.
Starting point is 01:36:42 Is Nick going to make this? Round 10. No. No. No. No. No. No. No. Brandon's now taking this very seriously.
Starting point is 01:37:02 Yeah. Roan making it. Loosen up, Brandon. Getting under making it. Loosen up, Brandon. Getting under his skin. Loosen up, Brandon. Really eating away at him right now. Roan's going to casually make another. Oh, that would have been great.
Starting point is 01:37:13 Quick learning curve for Roan. I know that he's shot a basketball before, but those first few attempts looked terrible. And then he got dialed in. He got dialed in quick. This is 11. Oh, my God. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:37:29 No, he can't. No, he can't. He's hit the light three times. It keeps surprising him. Yeah, the light has not moved. Oh! Brandon's got 500 bucks. There we go, Brando.
Starting point is 01:37:41 Brandon's got 500 bucks. Oh. What shot is this? What number is this? 12. Ooh. Pause play for a sec. Yeah, pause play for a sec.
Starting point is 01:38:02 We have a line violation request. Oh. Oh, no. Oh, no. Who requested that? pause play for a sec yeah pause play for a sec we have a line violation request oh rounds make oh no oh no who requested that on your main arc the whole chat's spamming it so let's see oh boy oh no oh shit no no it's good it's good what the how are they talking about it's good. It's good. It's good. What the? How are they talking about? It's good. No, that was a good review. Great review.
Starting point is 01:38:27 That was as close as you can get. Do they lose that? Does the chat lose their challenge now, though? No. How many challenges do they get? Brandon, did you just shoot another one without us? Yeah, I did. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:38:36 All right. That counted. What was that number? 13. You missed. Shot 12. Oh. Oh.
Starting point is 01:38:42 Oh. That wasn't shot 13. You had just missed. Shot 12. Oh. Okay. 13. No. Nick. Poor Nick. No. That was it. This is a fun and fair competition. Nick, poor Nick. We have two more. Now you have two more?
Starting point is 01:39:20 Two more each. Two more each. Roan has $500. Brandon has $500. How's it going up? 15? 15. We stopped it at 130.
Starting point is 01:39:33 Short. Ooh. Oh, Hank. Hank. Oh, Hank. Nick, you have one more shot. Come on, Nick. I lost it. He lost it.
Starting point is 01:39:46 Brandon just said he lost it. The man who went one for 14 said he lost it. Well, I hit the rim like nine times. Oh, shit. Oh, Ron's got 1,000 bucks. Roni. Nick, for 500 bucks? Oh, Nick.
Starting point is 01:40:03 He was just getting hot. Nick was just getting hot. Nick was just getting hot. Rowan's a sneaky good athlete, huh? Here comes Stu with a plate full of food. This is really a fun house. Stu just walking by. Whenever I have my own company and we're dishing out bonuses,
Starting point is 01:40:22 we're going to do like a drawing competition. Huh? That was my last. I'm done humiliating myself for the time being. I'm going to wait like three hours. This is fun and I love it. It makes me feel good. Alright, so Brandon, 500.
Starting point is 01:40:38 Roan, 1,000. Damn. 1,500 that I'd redistribute to the Yak if I make it. Time to undo my retweet of the coffee. There might be another twist. There might be another twist. I'm joking. I'm thinking of a twist.
Starting point is 01:40:51 No, I'm joking. I left it all out there. Okay. Titus, you're going to shoot from a little bit farther back. I think Titus would actually, if he shot half court, would – I think he would make like seven. Do you think seven? I hit four in a row.
Starting point is 01:41:07 Yeah. What? It's pretty easy. He's good at basketball. I am worried, though. Nick's got me worried about the light because the further back you go, the more the light comes into play. Okay.
Starting point is 01:41:18 I was banking on, yeah, making up for muscle. Yeah. Are they taking some shots? If Mook makes it, this is my two weeks. This is my two weeks. Yeah, wait. What's this warm-up? We didn't get to warm-up.
Starting point is 01:41:34 No warm-ups? No warm-ups? They can land on the other side. Yeah. Yeah, they can land wherever they want to land. Mook. Mook. Shot one. want to land. Mook. Mook. Shot one.
Starting point is 01:41:47 Let's go, Mook. The Chet sucks at challenging these plays. Why? He's going to get one. They threw another challenge on Roan. On Roan? The first one was close. Oh, Kyle.
Starting point is 01:41:56 Kyle. Here comes Titus. Titus is going to start hitting something. He said okay. He knew. Well, now he knows. Yeah. He said okay. He knew. Well, now he knows. Yeah. He, like, picked up the wind.
Starting point is 01:42:09 All right, Mookie. Oh, that's not bad, Mookie. What about a gambling show for Mookie? Kyle. Mookie bets. That's what he went by when he wrote for another company. Are you serious? Tydeus, do you think you can make one from there?
Starting point is 01:42:25 All right. All right. That's why it goes by Mook. Not his actual name. Mook is so scared of the line violation, he's shooting from where Titus is. So is Kyle. Oh. Oh.
Starting point is 01:42:38 This is making me feel better. Destructive-ass shot. Okay. Titus. Oh, Titus. Brandon, if you beat Titus! Oh Titus is gonna be hot. Brandon if you beat Titus that would be pretty cool. Yeah well I should have hit like four. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:42:51 Early on you were on that bitch. Oh! Oh no. Thank you. Lower than you think. I'm definitely gonna hit it now. I've talked shit. This one's going in, boys.
Starting point is 01:43:10 Dude doesn't have a prayer. Nice hair, though, dude. Five. Come on, Mook. Come on, Mook. Come on, baby. Oh, he's going to get it. Mook's going to get $2,000.
Starting point is 01:43:24 He's behind the line. That's fine. They challenged you twice, Ron. No. They've got to stop challenging. They've got to be wiser. What number are we on? I think they've got to be out of challenges.
Starting point is 01:43:33 Five. This will be six. Six, okay. So we're a third of the way. Come on, boys. Come on, boys. Get some money. I have a nice twist that's going to be fun.
Starting point is 01:43:42 I don't know. No. I don't want to take any money from anybody. No, it's going to be a fun twist, and you won't have to shoot again. I'm not going to the turf. I want to make one. Basketball's the main sport you can't really fake if you can't do it, is it? What are you talking about?
Starting point is 01:43:59 I just did it. I just faked it so good. I actually would say baseball. You can tell when someone hasn't learned how to throw a baseball. It's very apparent. Yeah. Yeah! Mook!
Starting point is 01:44:13 500 for Mook. Let's go. He was about to get evicted between you and I. Mook! Let's go, Mook. Come on, baby! Mook. I love it.
Starting point is 01:44:26 Get it! Let's goooooook. I love it. Get in! Yeah, Titus! Are we counting bank shots? Yeah. Well, no, you have to say it before. Did you say bank, Titus? Yeah, I said it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:42 Mook! Oh, if he gets $1,000, yeah. Mook. I want Mook. Oh, if he gets $1,000. Kyle. Kyle's getting worse. What shot are they on? Oh, this twist is going to be great because I'm going to put all the pressure on the one guy
Starting point is 01:44:54 who thinks he can always win. Brandon? No. Che. I'm going to put all the pressure on Che after this. Come on, Mook. Shot nine. Shot nine. Why did he change into a jersey? the pressure on Che after this. Come on, Mook.
Starting point is 01:45:07 Why did he change into a jersey? Oh, I thought that was it. 500. He's got it. He's got it He's got it So they all have 500 right now? Yes Tenth shot I want to see a couple of these guys get to 1,000
Starting point is 01:45:35 Mookie He said yup He did He said yup Yup was so crappy Where did that confidence come from? Yup He said yup
Starting point is 01:45:43 Steven left putting a little English on the pass back Where did that confidence come from? Yep. He said, yup. Steven loves putting a little English on the pass back. Fuck. Luckily, we have the Jumbotron to stop these balls. All right, Mook. Come on, Mook. Focus. Yep. Mook, next time, Steph Curry. Focus. Yep.
Starting point is 01:46:08 Mook, next time, Steph Curry. Just don't even watch it go in. Yep. Titus. Oh, that's two for Titus. A thousand. A thousand there. This is 12. This is 12. Ow. Oh, a little unorthodox.
Starting point is 01:46:38 A little Kareem out there. A little Manny Pacquiao out there. I like that. Get three. Get three. Oh. Titus is good. Titus would have hit like eight from half court. Oh yeah, that's just like a three-point line extended. Oh! I can't laugh. He's made more than me. When are you going over, Dave?
Starting point is 01:47:09 Big body boss man in the flesh. Mook, Mook, impress him. Is the second to last? Full body. Dedicated to the boss man. And Dave's just not even looking. Hit this. Oh, that was for the full body. Close.
Starting point is 01:47:29 It feels like they've had 1,000 shots. Yeah, Kyle's got 1,000. Titus has 1,000. Mook has 500. Yes. So, so far that's $4,000 that you're on the hook for. Four grand, okay. That the chat would potentially inherit.
Starting point is 01:48:02 All right, is this the last shot? Was that the last shot? This was the last shot. Ty just this the last shot? Was that the last shot? This was the last shot. Titus has his last shot. Oh! Oh! All right, so let's reset because I have a nice twist that I think will be fun. So I still have my one shot.
Starting point is 01:48:20 Oh, yeah. If I make it, the $4,000 will then be redistributed to the chat somehow. I don't know how, but we'll figure out a way. Equally. Everyone in the chat will get a small piece of the pie. All right. But it seems like you've got another twist, though. I have a twist. I have a twist because the producer should be involved, too.
Starting point is 01:48:38 So TJ and Zaz should be involved, too. So what are the numbers? You have a $500? Yeah. $1,000, $1000, 1,000, 500. Zero dollars, big cat. Okay, zero dollars, big cat. Okay, so here's what we're going to do.
Starting point is 01:48:53 Stephen Che is going to shoot free throws. Every free throw he makes is $100 to Stephen Che, TJ, and Zaha. And so $1,000 is the max. He's going to take 10 free throws. So the guys who got $1,000 are getting $1,000. Right on. Brandon, Mook, and Nick, you guys, as soon as he gets
Starting point is 01:49:17 over $5, you then could get $600. You get $700. So the max is $1,000. So if he goes 10 for 10, everyone gets $1,000. That's very fun 10 for 10, everyone gets $1,000. That's very fun. Why did you just say shit? Nick, if he makes one, you get $100 like that. This is great.
Starting point is 01:49:32 And so Zahn, TJ as well. I love Zahn. So Che has all the pressure. All the pressure on Che. All the pressure on Che. I'm sweating right now. How many half courts would you have made? How far a grand will go, Che?
Starting point is 01:49:46 I don't know. I was. So the half court here. You were very close every time. Yeah. I can shoot the half court more like a jump shot. You have to, like, really push it. But beyond half court, you have to, like, heave it, which makes it a different shot.
Starting point is 01:49:57 And then so if Che goes 10 for 10, that is 4, 6, 8. That's $9,000 that then if I hit the half court shot will go back to the chat. All back to chat. You ready, Che? 10 free throws. Any practice? Does he get a practice free throw? Why would he get a practice?
Starting point is 01:50:19 Because it's a different... I'll give him one practice if he lets me take one practice from my half-court shot. If you take what? If I get one practice from my half-court shot, I'll let you have one practice for free throws. What do you think? This is your choice.
Starting point is 01:50:34 I think that there's more upside for him on that. But also, if he hits the first shot and then misses the second shot, then he doesn't get that. I'll be warmed up by a three. All right. All right. No practice. Steven, do you want to predict? and then misses the second shot, then he doesn't get that. I'll be warmed up by a three. All right. All right. All right.
Starting point is 01:50:47 No practice. Steven, do you want to predict? Six for ten is my prediction. What do you think you got? I think six of ten. Pretty good shooter. I haven't shot today at all. Oh, you sound like you need some practice. I'm not great at free throw shooting, so I would say six is a fair line.
Starting point is 01:51:04 All right. I'll trade you two practice shots for one. Take it. Take that. Take it. You guys want that? Yeah, I think it's a good deal. You boys want that?
Starting point is 01:51:14 What is it? Two practice shots. I want you to make shots. I want you to make shots. Yeah. All right. They said yes? Yes, two practice shots.
Starting point is 01:51:21 You got this, Che. He gets two practice shots. I get one practice shot. Don't you remember you told me you loved me, Steven? Little offset right. Van Exel. Oh, God. Well, that's good, though.
Starting point is 01:51:37 Yeah. It's good he took a practice shot. Get him out of the way, yeah. Get a routine down, though. Damn. There we go. Get Bosco to. Oh oh Connor's doing it. Okay.
Starting point is 01:51:47 Alright, you ready Steven? Come on Che, you piece of shit. No. No. No. This is great. I'm just putting everyone against each other. Here we go.
Starting point is 01:51:57 These are his practice shots. Oh no. Oh no. Oh my god. What? He barely hit rims? First shot. He barely hit the rims? I'm ruined.
Starting point is 01:52:04 Oh my god! Che! He barely hit the rims! I'm ruined. Oh my god! He's choking! He's choking! He's choking! Oh my god! I'm gonna go out and talk to him. Time out! Time out!
Starting point is 01:52:20 Oh, he's rattled! TJ's coming out to talk to you. Oh no. Jesus. Oh, my God. Skinny-ass TJ. What the fuck is that? Slim body. That happens so fast.
Starting point is 01:52:33 Turn down the court mic. Slim body boss, man. Yeah, let's just narrate it. We don't need the court mic. Come on, Che. All right, so Che's 0 for 3 right now. Oh, my God. He's missed the same way every time.
Starting point is 01:52:50 Zero adjustments. This is such a choke job. No adjustments. This is such a choke job. He's missing the same spot every single fucking time. Every time he shoots. Oh, no. What happens if he goes 0 for 6?
Starting point is 01:53:01 This is like a... 0 for 6? If he goes 0 for 10, you guys should have to pay me. I don't know, this is better than money. I know, that's why we're here. Oh yeah! Fuck any amount of money. This is special needs Shaq. This is radio Shaq.
Starting point is 01:53:18 You like this? I've been waiting a long time for this. It popped up in my head. This is the best day of my life. I love this so much. I'm forwarding this to Caleb. I would have paid $1,000 for this. Someone text Caleb.
Starting point is 01:53:32 Tell him to turn this on. The minute you guys started shooting, I was like, I'm going to flip it on Che. Yeah. Oh, my God. 0 for 7. He's 0 for 7, folks. He had 6 as a fair line. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:53:45 This is incredible. He's 6 as a fair line. Oh, no. This is incredible. He's got his rhythm now. Try back it up. Try half court. No one has been less clutch. 0 for 8. Absolute fumble. 0 for 8.
Starting point is 01:54:00 This is beautiful. This is incredible. Just standing looking. 0 for 8. If he doesn't make one. He had no routine. He does it different every time. 100 bucks for the- 1 for 10 is almost funnier than...
Starting point is 01:54:24 Yeah. 0 for 10. Oh my god. One for 9. So Nick, Che, and TJ. That was 10. Nick, TJ, Zha, and Che all get
Starting point is 01:54:40 $100. So now it's $4,400. That was pathetic. He robbed the,400. That was pathetic. That the chat could get. He robbed the chat, too. That was pathetic. What do you have to say for yourself? Yeah, what do you have to say for yourself?
Starting point is 01:54:53 Oh, my God. That was, you can't, this might be the only time you've ever been able to not get away from this L. Yeah, no, I can't get one for 10. I mean, the proof is there. No, I was not preparing for that at all. You can never yell at someone to make their free throws again. That was a high-pressure free throw situation. No, once I got to 0 for 3.
Starting point is 01:55:20 He's got a different voice, doesn't he? Trying to make up for that? Once I got to 0 for 3 and I could hear you guys after each shot, it was a problem. That was so worth it, though, to watch you fail. That was awful, personally. I was preparing to shoot maybe a half-court shot. I'm not a good free-throw shooter.
Starting point is 01:55:37 What do you mean preparing? Mentally. I was like, all right, we're going to shoot half-court shots. I talked to the wrong arch in your head. Feeling good? No, I'm going to shoot half-court shots. I talked to them. That probably fucked up your game a little bit. You thought about a different shot. You had the wrong arch in your head. Feeling good? No, I'm not a good free-throw shooter. I'm Bruce Bowen.
Starting point is 01:55:50 You're two for 12 if you want to include this. I don't. Can he take a half-court shot? That's not better. Yeah, you want Shea to get out of jail free? All or nothing on the half-court shot? Yeah, I think everyone would risk that. $100?
Starting point is 01:56:06 Or what? And what do they get? What's the all? He gets 10 more free throws if he makes it. Yeah. 10 free throws? Yeah, if you make a half court shot right now, you get 10 more free throws. Total redo.
Starting point is 01:56:16 Oh, if I make it. Oh, okay. But we all have to put our 100 in on it. Yeah, yeah. On your free throw. No, no, no. The 100 will, because he might go one for 10 again. So I'm counting the 100.
Starting point is 01:56:25 You guys keep the 100. The 100's not up for grabs. Just one half-court shot. If you make it, you've got to go back to the free throw line. Does Che lose his 100 if he misses the... No. There has to be some sort of risk involved here. No, the risk is he has to take 10 more free throws.
Starting point is 01:56:37 It's a shame. Yeah, it's a shame. He doesn't want to make it. That was not fun for me. No, it was fun for us, though. It was great. All right, one half-court. One half-c court shot to get
Starting point is 01:56:46 10 more free throws i can't believe he's not blaming it on the blood tests yeah that's true tj titus how you feeling man this has been congrats delightful yeah it's a win for the chat like yeah jay is finally taking a loss he cannot get around yeah this is worse than a hackabin one for 10 is oh so abysmal. That's really hard to do. Should we have Mincy shoot free throws? What are you doing? Just for fun.
Starting point is 01:57:10 Just for science. What are you doing? Should we have Mincy shoot ten just for science? No money involved. Chase is going to take a half-court shot, then I'd just like to see you take ten free throws. Yeah, ten free throws. Just to see.
Starting point is 01:57:22 He just walked by. He was just pumping his fist. I want him to just get his sound. What are you still doing? What's that? He's got the eye of the tiger going in his you. Just to see. He just walked by. He was just pumping his fist. I want him to just get his sound. What are you still doing? What's that? He's got the eye of the tiger going in his head. You can tell. I watched Mincy last night pitch PFT on a Ben Mintz macro dosing appearance
Starting point is 01:57:38 where he talks through his second act. Yeah. I know about the second act. And the reason he felt macro dosing would be appropriate is because Macrodosing was listed as a cultural website. Or a cultural podcast, I'm sorry. And what did PFT say? PFT was like, yeah. He's got to do it.
Starting point is 01:57:56 All right, Che. Come on, Che. Come on, Che. Swat this. We need this, man. Oh, my God. And that's what he was preparing for. This is porn.
Starting point is 01:58:15 This is porn. Oh, my God. Do it again, Che. Do it again. Just keep doing it, please. I need this. Don't turn on the mic on the sound. Let's just watch Vince shoot and see if he can hit.
Starting point is 01:58:26 Two. You just got to get two. Anything more than one. Two out of ten. Use the good ball. Use the good ball. Che was one for ten. So just, if you beat him.
Starting point is 01:58:35 We just want to see you beat Che. He's got a routine. Yeah. Okay, never mind. Oh, shit. Okay. He's going to get three. Yeah, he's going to get at least two.
Starting point is 01:58:50 Oh, shit. It's all right. He's dancing around it. Maybe not. He still is way ahead of Che. Yeah. Even at 0 for 2, statistically. TJ, this is a really good shot.
Starting point is 01:59:00 Yeah. Oh, no. Okay, this is backfiring. This is backfiring. Should we cut it? this is backfiring. This is backfiring. Should we cut it? It's backfiring. Wait, wait, wait. No, he's got it.
Starting point is 01:59:08 He's got it. Oh! Swish! All right, get hot, Mitzi. All right, Jay. Stay hot, Mitzi. You're all right, Mitzi. We might have a shoot off.
Starting point is 01:59:30 There we go. There we go. Oh. Leaning like Jordan against the Jazz. Why? Why? There you go. Come on, Mincy.
Starting point is 01:59:42 How many is that? I think that's eight. No, that was seven. Seven? Yeah. Come on, Mincy. How many is that? I think that's eight. No, that was seven. Seven? Oh, no. He's got to hit one more. Come on, Mince. He's got two more.
Starting point is 01:59:56 Come on, Mince. Oh, Mincy, no. No. Not like this. No, not like this. This one, come on. Hit this one. He has two left. Yeah, but that's him counting. Yeah, but that like this. This one, come on. Hit this one. He has two left.
Starting point is 02:00:07 Yeah, but that's him counting. Yeah, but that's fine. All right, one more. One more, last one. One more, last one. I mean, he's tied him at least, so. What are you saying, Chad? It's not a loss.
Starting point is 02:00:17 Make it, Mincy. Yes. Oh! Oh! All right, so 4,400 is the number? Yeah. All right. And you get one practice, right?
Starting point is 02:00:27 One practice. One practice. Oh, this is about to be very funny. But if you hit the practice, it does not mean anything. No, nothing. I wanted to hit the practice. There's no going back-to-back almost. High stakes Low ceiling, huh?
Starting point is 02:00:58 It's like playing in Dallas Oh Oh, so he's online Yeah, that was bad We should not have a practice This is for chat. I'll get it all this Come on big cat Holy shit. Holy shit. Oh my god.
Starting point is 02:01:27 Chat. Chat W. Shout out to Chat. Shout out to Chat. TJ, I'm throwing the challenge flag. Video review. Video challenge. Challenge it. Video review.
Starting point is 02:01:42 Footfall. That was awesome. Chat gets $4,400 Challenge it. Video review. Footfall. That was awesome. That was so awesome. Fuck yeah. So Chad gets $4,400 of help. It's a warm-up shot. $4,400. Oh, so far back.
Starting point is 02:01:57 Let's go. That's incredible. Chad. That's so awesome. Mook, you needed that. Fuck yeah. Mook is furious at the chat right now. That is pure anger. Let the chatty.
Starting point is 02:02:08 Let the chatty. Let the chatty. Holy shit. The only thing that sucked was you guys obviously were pissed, so I had no cheering. It was like hitting an away shot to end the season. Nick was pretty happy. Why was that?
Starting point is 02:02:21 What were you happy? They all have $0. Oh, man. So, TJ, how are we going to give this up? Double or nothing, bro. I don't know have zero dollars. Oh, man. So, TJ, how are we going to give this chat money? Double or nothing, bro. I don't know. I kind of doubted you. I'll be honest.
Starting point is 02:02:30 You did. You did doubt me, didn't you? I thought there was no chance you were getting. Oh, hell yes. We got to go double or nothing. I feel like it's... That sucks because... For the chat.
Starting point is 02:02:40 No. Fuck that. Not for us. So, we get nothing. The chat is pumped. Yeah, I'm happy for him. No, that's big us. So we get nothing. The chat is pumped. Yeah, I'm happy for him. No, that's big. Dubs in the chat.
Starting point is 02:02:49 So should it be like 10 people in the chat get money, or should like a ton of people get a very small amount? I think it's better if only a couple people get it. I think like 10 people get the split. Or like what if 44 people get $100? Let's go. No, let's go. Do we have to just Like get Venmos
Starting point is 02:03:05 Do you have to send us A proof of your 44 people get 100 bucks That works Yeah That's easy Or 10 people get
Starting point is 02:03:12 4400 I kind of like 10 people getting more Yeah What is it Put up a poll Put up a poll Yeah
Starting point is 02:03:19 It's their turn to gamble Chat rules 10 people get 440 bucks Or One person gets all One person that would be crazy three options three options you guys get to vote you guys get 44 or one and then we gotta figure out beast yeah you guys didn't think i had that shot not at all not in your back i did i was like
Starting point is 02:03:39 let's go big cat you're back to tape the practice shot you could tell you're gonna make the second it was online i was online. That was online, yeah. Did you go for the bank on purpose? No. I just knew that because I was online but short, I had to throw it higher. Fair. Let's go. That was awesome.
Starting point is 02:03:54 Sorry, boys. Shouldn't have given me the practice shot. That actually was the biggest mistake. No, because if I didn't have a practice shot, I would not have made it. Che. Che. Che. I was open to whatever people wanted to do.
Starting point is 02:04:05 We agreed, though. Yeah. Practice shot hurt me, too. There's nobody to blame but ourselves. To be honest, I was – How did a practice shot hurt you? I was going to give all my money to the chat anyway, so I'm actually – I'm actually very happy.
Starting point is 02:04:16 They get more money than I was going to give them. I was going to give it to Nick, honestly. Yeah, and I was going to double it and give it. I was already looking on Facebook Marketplace for more couches. Fill it up, man. I was like, we're ready to go. I was already looking on Facebook Marketplace for more couches. Fill it up, man. I was like, ready to go. You're happy, and now you're not. I was so pumped.
Starting point is 02:04:31 That's the best kind of humor. Happy than not. That was going to be a lot of money for you, and now it's gone. That's the world to me. Oh, yeah. That's funny. I'll be okay. Chat.
Starting point is 02:04:39 Chat, you guys got to do something for me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chat, give me one. I want that one. You should leave right now and go hop in the chat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ten gift cards. Ten gift cards. Come on, Mooks. I want that one. Mooks, you should leave right now and go hop in the chat. Just, like, go around the corner and create a story. Just spam in the chat. Yeah, you'd only have lost 60 bucks.
Starting point is 02:04:54 Facts. Actually, I'm going to hop in there right now. Yeah, dude. Just get in there, Mooks. All right, so, TJ, how are we going to figure this out? If you can figure out... There's a couple ways we can do it. Yeah, if you can pick 10 people randomly, I'll just Venmo 10 people.
Starting point is 02:05:12 Do you want to do Stella Blue Coffee enjoyers? Yeah. Okay, if you buy the Yak blend, tweet a picture of your receipt at me, and I'll pick 10 people. Yeah. Two pictures. Show that you're in chat. Yeah, you have to show you're in the chat. Yeah, screenshot that you're in the chat. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 02:05:27 Screenshot that you're in the chat right now, and screenshot your receipt from your Stella Blue coffee cookie blend order. And we'll pick 10 people, and 10 people will get $440. Tweet it at either me or the Yak, either one. I love it. Wait, dude, what if one person got $4,400? I know, it would have been electric. Yeah. Hell yes.
Starting point is 02:05:42 I can't believe you made that. I knew you were capable. That was a great moment. I didn't think you would make. I knew you were capable. I didn't think you would make it. It's a great moment for the chat. Great moment for the chat. Terrible moment for Mook. I'll be okay. I'll survive.
Starting point is 02:05:54 I'll survive. I'll be your sugar daddy. Daddy, I know you got me. Christmas bonuses come around. All right. Great moment for me. Me and KB making the same amount of shots as Titus, honestly. That's true. That's true.
Starting point is 02:06:05 That's true. I'm happy for the boys in the chat. And Titus only made two more shots than me. And you played D1. Did you make any? I hit rim twice. I made as many shots as Che. I hit the ceiling more than you, so I'm stronger.
Starting point is 02:06:21 You shot lights out, Nick. Bad look for out, Nick. Bad look for Brandon, though. The court's been nothing but bad for me. Wait, why are they L-ing now? Nothing but bad. Why are they L-ing? Is it an L method? Oh, it's an L method.
Starting point is 02:06:34 Because they don't want to buy coffee? Oh, they don't want to buy coffee? Oh. Oh. Well, that's not what it is. That's fine. TJ, we don't have to do the coffee. Yeah, how about just send a screenshot of you in the chat?
Starting point is 02:06:42 Yeah, that's fine. Send a screenshot of you in the chat. You don't have to buy the coffee. All right, hurry up. The first ten are getting it, so. All right, so you don't have to buy the coffee. I would like you to do the coffee. Yeah, how about just send a screenshot of you in the chat? Yeah, that's fine. Send a screenshot of you in the chat. You don't have to buy the coffee. All right, hurry up. The first 10 are getting it. All right, so you don't have to buy the coffee. I would like you to buy the coffee. Maybe buy the coffee if you win.
Starting point is 02:06:51 But yeah, we will do... So it'll be the first 10 and girls. First 10. Yes. So however many girls, then the first 10 after that. So no coffee receipt necessary. Just the chat. You need to tweet your Venmo in the chat.
Starting point is 02:07:06 And also, I think Venmo you can only send three grand a week? Three grand a day. Is it? All right, so some people might have to wait a day. What's your Venmo move? Good man. Yeah, people can... I'm chilling.
Starting point is 02:07:24 People can buy coffee or not buy coffee it's not mandatory that you buy the coffee no purchase necessary no purchase necessary we'll just give out the money that's totally fair uh and if you like the coffee do it fine the yak blend is great i will say this uh for all the guys here sitting right now who did not win money, I will still, when we figure out how the butter cookie sold, they will still get something. Perfect. Love it. Money's gone.
Starting point is 02:07:52 Got way more than 10 already. You got 10 already? I got like 50. Oh, man. So you're going to pick them randomly? No, put them all on a wheel. Okay. Yep.
Starting point is 02:08:01 That's getting us all. Yes. Put all 50 on a wheel. These people probably think they're so close to getting it. We'll do a cutoff at like midnight And I'll just put 200 people on a wheel And then one of those people comes in Shoots one half court shot Now if they make that shot
Starting point is 02:08:14 Here's what happens If they miss it goes back to us Oh I love this Alright so TJ Do Yeah get everyone On a wheel We need their Venmo tag though too right
Starting point is 02:08:24 Sure Or some way Yeah need their Venmo tag, though, too, right? Sure. Or some way to, yeah. No, only Venmo. So tomorrow we won't do an elimination wheel. We'll do a wheel of everyone who submits. That's the fairest way to do this. And the chat will, like, I'll literally sit here on tomorrow's yak and we will Venmo the 10 people.
Starting point is 02:08:45 Cut off at midnight tonight so I can make the wheel. Well, no. You should do a cutoff right now because the people can't. Then you won't know if they were in the chat. Okay. Just do a first hundred. Yeah, do it right now. Yeah, tweet it right now, and you will get on the wheel.
Starting point is 02:08:58 You have to do it right now. What's the time frame that's like a cutoff if they're beyond this time point? What time is it now? 2-11. So, like, by 2- point? What time is it now? 2.11. So like by 2.15 central? Yeah. Let's do 2.20. Give them nine more minutes.
Starting point is 02:09:12 This is perfect. The chat is full body as hell right now. The chat is firing. Yeah, they are popping off. What do they want? Love it. They want the money. Remember, don't put your Venmo tag in the chat.
Starting point is 02:09:24 You need to tweet at TJ that you're in the chat and then with your Venmo tag, and then we'll put it on the wheel tomorrow. My reward was just making the shots, honestly. Yeah, mine too. Yeah, that felt amazing. I'm happy I hit one. Yeah.
Starting point is 02:09:35 It was trippy as hell to have no control over where it went. You are still blunted. I didn't even know if you were blunted still. That was the highest shit I've ever heard. I felt like a toddler, yeah. In a new place. Yeah, yeah. Like underwater, kind of.
Starting point is 02:09:50 A toddler in jello is what you look like. I'm looking at the chat. How are people still confused? I don't think people are confused. The one guy who said that Venmo banned him from gambling, you can submit still and I'll find a way to get you the money. That's fair. He ain't winning it.
Starting point is 02:10:13 That guy doesn't have shit to worry about anyway. He's not going to fucking win it. What a moment. Philanthropy feels fucking good even though I was pissed. It was never my money. Also, Kate will get 15 shots when she comes back and then every shot she makes will go to the chat but don't tell her
Starting point is 02:10:34 let her celebrate every shot you make it's 500 listen she actually did say the beef would come in and shoot so maybe if the beef wants to come in tomorrow, we can let him shoot 15 times. Is this like a numbers hack? If we just did a giveaway every day with 50 to 100 people? Well, yes, but then let's play it out for a second. Yeah, why don't we do this every day? Someone has to pay for that every day. As kind of like as a kickstart to get the boost in numbers.
Starting point is 02:11:06 Yeah, everyone subscribe. I mean, it is a good idea in theory, but it also sounds like I will lose all my money to the chat. Why don't we just give away like a hundred grand a week? All of a sudden we have a show where the entire chat is far richer than everyone on the show. Then the chat has the gun. They make us dance. Yeah. I dance for the show. Then the chat has the gun. They make us dance. Yeah. I'd dance for the chat.
Starting point is 02:11:29 I would dance. Shake my gear. Be shaking that thing like ice spice. Yeah. Covering it up. No, we'll do something like this, though, like once a month or something, for sure. This is cool.
Starting point is 02:11:39 Yeah. We'll absolutely do something like this. Tomorrow I'm here. Tomorrow. Just tomorrow. Yeah. Why is this person saying confusing? It's not confusing. If you're in the chat right now, screenshot it and tweet it to TJ and you'll be added something like this. Tomorrow I'm here. Tomorrow. Just tomorrow. Yeah. Why is this person saying confusing? It's not confusing.
Starting point is 02:11:45 If you're in the chat right now, screenshot it and tweet it to TJ and you'll be added to the wheel. Put in your Venmo name. The wheel tomorrow will be as many people as that send TJ their name and Venmo and chat right now. And we will wheel. And the first 10 names to come up will get $440. It couldn't be more simple. Right? It could be more simple if we gave get $440. It couldn't be more simple. Right? It couldn't be more simple
Starting point is 02:12:06 if we gave it to one person. Yeah. But this is very simple. Yeah. Or something. It's one of those social programs. What is the plan for tomorrow? Can you walk me through the yak to dodgeball? Yes.
Starting point is 02:12:21 What's all that look like? Okay, so... Who's involved with dodgeball what time is everything happening i'll be a little late to the yak i have to do an interview uh that will hopefully only i'll be here like maybe 30 minutes late which will be funny because it is the day that i'm giving away four thousand dollars so people will be like what the fuck he no-showed letting you know right now i'll be a little bit late. So regular yak, probably two hours. And at maybe the second hour, we will pick the dodgeball teams. And then as soon as the yak ends, we will redirect the stream to the dodgeball stream.
Starting point is 02:12:59 Who is eligible to be drafted? Everyone who wants to participate in the office. So we're going to probably keep it to teams of five. So if let's say there's 40 people, we'll do eight teams. We'll make a quick bracket. And yeah, maybe we'll do a cash prize. I love that. I fucking love that.
Starting point is 02:13:19 A little skadoosh for the people. Depends. Here's another thing we've got to do. Everyone who's watching the Barstool Invitational tonight, starting in about four and a half hours, root really hard for Loyola Chicago plus six and a half and Mississippi State minus three and a half. If both of those win, then we'll do a cash prize tomorrow. Yes.
Starting point is 02:13:39 Yes. It's pretty simple. Here we go. It's pretty simple. The cash prizes that we do in this office are going to be all based on how I'm doing gambling. Yeah. That's perfect. So have a room for me.
Starting point is 02:13:51 You'll know when the cash prizes stop, I have been losing a lot of money. You start doing live shows. Where did you used to do them at? Joe's on Weed? No, I used to just do a tweet. People are tweeting at me. It was just a tweet. I thought when you owed your bookie, you'd have a live show or something.
Starting point is 02:14:07 It was just a tweet to go to Joe's. It was like a tweet to go to Joe's with a beer deal. It was a pizza place that I would just give. They'd give me $500 to just tweet that I'm eating at the pizza place. It was a Hawaiian shirt company. I remember that. And I can't remember what the last one was. But, yeah, every time I did it, everyone was oh tough week gambling yep yeah no four hundred dollars for the half court shots
Starting point is 02:14:31 yeah tough week gambling luke are you tweeting at tj nope get on the wheel i'm not getting get on the wheel i'm not getting on tj put mook on the wheel no matter what well how about a half court shot to see if you get on the wheel dude Dude, I want chat to eat, man. I'm chilling. Yeah, but that would just be one of the 440 spots. I want chat to benefit here. I'm good. There will be more opportunities for me.
Starting point is 02:14:56 I'm sure. I'm just addicted to the thrill. I do want to shoot more shots, though. I do, too. It's like mad fun. We're doing that tonight, right? Like, isn't one of the halftime shows? Just literally all of us shooting half-court shots?
Starting point is 02:15:08 Defenders. It was fun last time. Frank hit the one, right? Yeah. Legend. We should get Sister Jean out there. Get her in line. I want her and Mincy to have a podcast.
Starting point is 02:15:27 I want Mincy to take her to widespread panic. Tavis Braggles in from Funniest Travis. Oh, hell yeah, Tavis. How many free throws, if we give Sister Jean ten shots, how many free throws is she hitting? At least one, right? Yeah, at least. She did it one.
Starting point is 02:15:44 One out of ten? Come on. Damn. Nick, what the fuck, dude? My bad. What? I'm getting scolded by merch. By legal.
Starting point is 02:15:58 Yeah. What'd you do? For what? I said the anus giveaway for Black Friday. If we sold enough shirts, we'd pick one person to live with Mook for a week. And I told Legal, I told Merch, and I forgot to tell Mook. To live with me on my couch? How'd you find out?
Starting point is 02:16:15 I just got ratted out, and now we're in a group chat, and I'm getting yelled at. Legal asked if we're insane. Just a random guy? You just found this out right now? Yeah. Right this second? Yeah. I've been in You just found this out right now? Yeah. Right this second? Yeah. I've been in three meetings about it.
Starting point is 02:16:28 You have? Yeah. Dude. Kyle was in the one yesterday. Yeah. What the fuck? I was. You see Mook covered in spaghetti?
Starting point is 02:16:37 What? Oh, yeah. Oh. That's crazy. Oh. It's like a dream come true. I know. That's how I was going to get if I won the five hundo.
Starting point is 02:16:47 It's just going to get like eight orders of spaghetti and meatballs and just douse myself. That's not right. What I'm seeing is not right right there. So when are you going to Perth? March 7th. It's going to be a? March 7th. Damn. Yeah. It's going to be a quick trip? In and out.
Starting point is 02:17:08 Quick trip. Just how I like it, in and out. All right, so TJ, you got everyone? If there's some stragglers, let them in. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, the more the merrier on the wheel. It'll be funny to see a giant wheel of, like, 500 people. Is it first 10 or elimination?
Starting point is 02:17:23 First 10, not elimination. 10 then wait how do we just okay never mind we'll figure this out yeah tj's got it thank you tj i appreciate it um all right well we should uh that was amazing yeah that was fun that was a lot of fun that was fun we will definitely do more of those we We'll think of different games. We'll just keep doing it where everyone can win money and then I get one chance to give it back to the chat. It's great because it gets the chat. The chat has to root for you guys and then root for me. If you guys didn't make any half-court shots,
Starting point is 02:18:00 it would have been no money. But the chat can't be rooting for you. They weren't rooting for Che. Somebody in the chat just venmo requested me 440 actually yeah i like i like that send it yeah the really the the winner today is uh the chat and everyone else on this show because che is the biggest loser of all time one for 10 you can't get worse than that and making the decision to give to give me his two warm-up shots did nothing
Starting point is 02:18:30 to help him. That was worth losing my thousand dollars, absolutely. How much would you have paid for that? I'll pay a thousand dollars every single day. Just to watch the show. Did you change into shoes for those free throws, Che? What's up? Did you change into different shoes for those free throws, too?
Starting point is 02:18:46 Yeah. I tweaked my ankle rebounding. Oh, shut up. I said that. Oh, I didn't know you had a tweaked ankle. Oh, that changes everything. Also, I love TJ. Just as soon as Che got out there, he's like, come on, you piece of shit.
Starting point is 02:18:59 As soon as he's out of an ear shot. Yeah. Oh, my God. That was fun. All right. Everyone, please tune in. Barstool Invitational tonight. Anthem's going off at 545.
Starting point is 02:19:11 Where can people watch it? Barstool TV and the Barstool Sports YouTube. Whoa. Oh, really? Yeah. So you just go on the Barstool YouTube and you can watch it right there. Yep. I will be getting revenge on Nick and KB for wheelbarrowing me.
Starting point is 02:19:22 Yeah. Oh, God. What are you going to get revenge on Nick and KB for wheelbarrowing me. Yeah. Oh, God. What are you going to do? Yak basketball. Yak basketball halftime of the first show, of the first game. Also, please, everyone right now, subscribe to the Yak YouTube. You can do that. We're giving away money. Please subscribe.
Starting point is 02:19:37 Like this episode. But, yes, 545 Anthem, 6 o'clock first tip. I think 830 is the second tip. Brandon and Titus will be the intermission in between the two games. Yak basketball at halftime of the first game. I think half-court shots at halftime of the second game. Jeff D. Lowe will be doing trivia. It's going to be awesome.
Starting point is 02:19:58 Caleb and Roan are going to be doing interviews during the games. So it's going to be a great time, fully barstool. Tune in. And if you're in Chicago, you didn be a great time, fully barstool. Tune in. And if you're in Chicago, you didn't buy a ticket, you want to come, there's still a few tickets left, and it's going to be great. So see everyone tonight. It's the act. Get your straws, yeah. Silent day for a while. It's the act.
Starting point is 02:20:29 It's the act. It's the act. Yeah, it's time to talk shop. We're doing it. It's the act. It's the act. You got like five to ten more minutes to send me those requests. Also, feel free to drop a follow button on the old Twitter while you're there. If you're coming out to the Invitational tonight, make sure to say what up.
Starting point is 02:21:02 We'll be walking around mingling. And we'll see you guys tomorrow. Bye. Peace.

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