The Yak - The Tunnel of Chaos Isn't for Everybody | The Yak 2-9-24

Episode Date: February 9, 2024

Josh Allen. GOAT.You can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Yo, TJ, pull that up. Hello. It's the Yak. Last day. Last day. Last day. Roback.com, R-H-O-B-A-C-K.com, Roback.com, promo code YAK, 20% off your first purchase, excuses, polo, soaps, joggers, shorts. YAK.
Starting point is 00:00:53 Beautifully done. Roback.com. Roback. The most comfortable clothes in the world. I'm Robacked out, head to toe. Boys. You got some more energy this morning, Dan. I'll tell you what, Titus.
Starting point is 00:01:09 Speaking man to man, the two of us as brothers for life in the tunnel of chaos, life is nice. It's good living out here. I like this Vegas thing. Around your pocket area. Yeah. It sure is. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:20 Life is good. You and your big boy, what's going on? So mostly sports. So, Tyson and I talked last night, and we're like, hey, let's keep Tunnel of Chaos to the YAC because we were both there. Brandon was not there. Yep. Was invited. He was invited.
Starting point is 00:01:35 Nobody invited me. Mostly sports. Obviously, Brandon being not there, like, you can't relate to him anymore. Yeah. It's kind of like a after Christ. Is that what it is? When they start time after Christ? After death?
Starting point is 00:01:51 BC and AD? Yeah, my life has changed. I'm now tunnel. Once you get to Tunnel of Chaos, you never see anything different. They're the same. So you guys had your 100th episode today, Mostly Sports.
Starting point is 00:02:00 Congratulations. Longest Brandon Walker's ever made on a show. That's not true at all. Longest Brandon Walker's ever made on a show. That's not true at all. Longest Brandon Walker's ever made on a show. What show have you gone 100? Unnecessary Reference is like 400. That's Casey's show. We have to do this. Y'all want a bunch of money and we gotta do...
Starting point is 00:02:15 So we sent videos. Is that KB? Yeah. Saying congratulations for 100 episodes but I sent a first draft of the video and then I was like, wait, I don't want Connor to put this in there because I want to talk about the tunnel of chaos. So TJ, do you have my first draft?
Starting point is 00:02:32 Congratulations on 100K. No, 100. Sorry, it's late. Just got back. Congratulations on 100 episode. Brandon, we miss you at the Tunnel of Chaos. I really wish that all of you guys, Titus, can tell you all about it.
Starting point is 00:02:50 Tunnel of Chaos for life. 100, though. Let's go. That's what that looks like? Dude, the Tunnel of Chaos. I mean, so, Titus, how much money did you win? Say it. I won $20,000.
Starting point is 00:03:08 Yeah. I won $20,000. You won $20,000? You won $20,000. Yeah. Not right this second. Well, yeah, but, like, when you check out of the Park MGM at 4. I did.
Starting point is 00:03:18 That was a nerd. No, no, no, no. I've taken some measures to. But we all won. When we left the casino, I was like, I've taken some measures to... But we all won. We left the casino. I was like, I don't know what to do right now. So 11 of you took advantage of a casino. Cliche.
Starting point is 00:03:33 We went to the casino. That's a very good point. We went there. We had dinner. We were talking like we were going to win. I said that we were like the 90s cowboys. We just had a winning culture. We were just laughing at dinner.
Starting point is 00:03:48 We get into the tunnel of chaos, and it was just win, win, win, win, win. Dave won 90. I won, I think, 23. PFT won 25. Hank won 10. Titus won 20. Jerry won 10. Literally, everybody won.
Starting point is 00:04:01 Will won 10. Everybody won. Everybody won. Literally. If you were there, you won. Everybody won. Everybody won. Literally. If you were there, you won. No, I wouldn't. No, no, no. It's like a Nick lost 130 grand.
Starting point is 00:04:11 I am that guy. I thought I was going to lose because that is what I do. I was like, this is all set up. Everybody's going to win. I'm going to lose. Nick, I won 20 grand, 23 grand in three hands. Here's the thing, though. Like three hands of blackjack.
Starting point is 00:04:23 I would have been the one guy that couldn't afford to lose. And so what would have happened? Nick, I couldn't afford to lose. I was down $70,000. I didn't want to say that. I heard you were down $70,000. I was down $70,000. He was down $70,000.
Starting point is 00:04:33 Titus was at the table down $70,000. I was like, oh, no, he's going to commit suicide. No, my options were either kill myself. Yeah, that was your only option. Or win $20,000. Yes. And then the winning culture took over. Will Compton was down $350,000.
Starting point is 00:04:51 And he still ended up winning $15,000. I get nervous when I get a phone call from an unknown number. Oh, you should have seen Titus. Titus was shitty because we were all like, basically it was one after another. Dave went and I went. Then I think Taylor went. And then so we go down the line. It's like, Jerry, you're up.
Starting point is 00:05:10 Everyone's chanting. And then we're like, Titus, you got to go. And he's just like, I don't fucking want to do this. I don't want to do this. Titus, get in the seat. And he sits down. It's like a $15,000 hand right away. And he's just like.
Starting point is 00:05:24 Yeah, lose. You lost your $15,000 hand. Right away. Off the rip. Dude, so the lead up to the night, Will and Taylor have cornered me three consecutive nights and said, are you coming to Red Rocks? And I've played the mostly sports
Starting point is 00:05:38 card where I'm like, I've got to get up early, man. I can't be out gambling all night. We've got these live shows. At the dozen last night, I don't know if they're trying to sell me a timeshare or what, but the pressure I felt where they're just backing me literally into a corner and they're like, you have to come tonight. I'm like, I can't, guys. I don't know how
Starting point is 00:05:55 many times to tell you, I don't really gamble. I don't feel comfortable doing this. I'm going to be in over my head. Then Will's just like, I thought you were one of the boys. Are you not one of the boys? I'm like, you son over my head. And then Will's just like, I thought you were one of the boys. Are you not one of the boys? I'm like, you son of a bitch. All right. And then I asked, like, who else is going?
Starting point is 00:06:09 Because I thought it was just them two. They just wanted me. Because I was like, are you going to harvest my organs? Like, what the fuck is this? They said other people were going. So I started, I asked PFT and Hank. They're like, yeah, we're going. I felt a little more comfortable.
Starting point is 00:06:21 We get there and we go to dinner. And I don't say a word the entire dinner because i'm just listening because like i'm still trying to understand what the fuck this system is because will compton god bless him is not really great at sounding smart and no when will compton is explaining something i i am like will i love you that's the dumbest shit i've ever yes and he's yes he's right on this and he's like he's likeus, it's easy. It's the tunnel of chaos. Here's how it works. I'm like, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:06:46 You sit down and you win. And you bought it. He's like, you just say how much money you want to win. And I was like, okay, $1,000. He's like, let's do it. So I was like,
Starting point is 00:06:54 how are we going to do it? He goes, what you do is you just have to sit down and bet $1,000. And if you win, you're done. Yeah. I'm like, okay, got it. What if I lose?
Starting point is 00:07:06 He's like, no, no, no. So that's the thing. All you have to do is just keep playing and i was like no you don't will yeah and i'm just sitting there at dinner and like dave and dan are like okay i got it and i was i was being a little bit i was like this doesn't make sense yeah but then every time like dave was like yeah okay and then like dave would like wait for five minutes he'd be like oh wait a second this doesn't make any fucking sense at all. Everyone's going back and forth. I, at one point at dinner, pulled out Uber, and I was going to Irish exit because I was like, I got to get the fuck out of here. Thank God you didn't.
Starting point is 00:07:33 Because Will was trying to get, like, that was the really scary, not scary, but that was like the pivotal moment was Will tried to not play. Yeah, he was like, I'm not going to play, and I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah. You got me and Dave here, and now you're not playing? He pulled, I'm not going to play. And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Yeah. You got me and Dave here, and now you're not playing? And Taylor's going to pretend he has diarrhea? Like, I can see where this is going. We're like, you're playing.
Starting point is 00:07:52 You're going in the tunnel. So Will says that, and you lost your mind. You're like, everybody's playing. Yeah. And I was privately like shitting my pants, because I was like, fuck, if Will wasn't going to play, then I was just going to piggyback that and be like, well, I'm just going to hang with Will. We're just going to hang over here and not play. And then they're like, everybody's going to play. So I pull out Uber, and I'm like, I got if Will wasn't going to play, then I was just going to piggyback that and be like, well, I'm just going to hang with Will. We're just going to hang over here and not play.
Starting point is 00:08:06 And then they're like, everybody's going to play. So I pull out Uber and I'm like, I got to get the fuck out of here, dude. Like, I can't do this. But then we go. Dave sits down. Who was the guy from like, there were guys from like another group. The Nelk boys were there, some of them. Thiney.
Starting point is 00:08:21 Thiney was there. Steve will do it was there. Did you notice Dave's first hand, like Dana's running all the shit. Yeah. Dana's like, here's what you do. I didn't touch my cards. Yeah, he touches all the cards. Dana just plays cards.
Starting point is 00:08:31 Dana's like, I got it. I got it. Yeah. It was crazy. But yeah. So Dave sits down. Dave plays the first hand. And one of those guys from that crew
Starting point is 00:08:41 tells Dave to double or split or something. And Dana's like, why would you do that? And, like, Dana goes, who told him to double? And it didn't work for him, right? No, he would have won it. Oh, he would have won it. But there was, like, a miscommunication on the first hand. And you could tell Dana was like, don't ever do that again.
Starting point is 00:08:57 Yeah. And, like, Dana's like, I'm in control. Yeah. And then we all sat back. And from that moment on, it just, like, everybody kept winning. I just literally sat down. And there was, like, how much you want to win? He's like, 10.
Starting point is 00:09:05 I'm so glad I wasn't there. You would have loved it. Dude, and then, like. You could literally say what you wanted to win. Harry did that. I don't know if you invited. Will and Taylor are masters of peer pressure. Well, all right.
Starting point is 00:09:15 I went back to a text from Taylor this morning. Jerry was the funniest. Yeah. Because Jerry, we're like, Jerry, sit down. He's like, I don't want to. Guys, I can't. I can't. And then Jerry sits down, literally wins the very first hand.
Starting point is 00:09:25 Wins, like, 15 grand or something like that. He's like, I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm Guys, I can't. I can't. And then Jerry sits down, literally wins the very first hand, wins like 15 grand or something like that. He's like, I'm done. I'm done. I'm done. I'm going home because I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. So I was like one of the last ones to go.
Starting point is 00:09:33 And I was like, I want no part of this because I know, like you said, I'm going to be the one guy that fucks this up. I basically just like someone, I don't even know who grabs me. They just grab me, throw my ass down in the chair. We all just started chanting your name, too. You had no choice. And I'm sitting there, and Dana turns to me, and he's like, how much do you want to win? And I look at the chips he's got, and he's playing $5,000 chips.
Starting point is 00:09:55 So I was like, I'll just, sir, could I just get one $5,000 chip, please? Just, like, one. And he's like, fuck it, and, like, puts 15 down. And I'm like, what is going on? But I lose. Then he does, like, fuck it, and puts 15 down. And I'm like, what is going on? But I lose. Then he does another 15, and I lose. Titus was just sitting there like, fuck the fuck. And then all of a sudden, I'm down 70, but it's not really my money. Yeah, he's a white.
Starting point is 00:10:15 But it's also like, I'm responsible for this somehow, but also I haven't touched any of these fucking cards. Right. And I'm not. I'm like, where am I? What happens if I'm the one that fucks all this up? But I didn't do anything. That's the winning culture.
Starting point is 00:10:27 We weren't going to lose. And then we win. You guys are all mentally ill. And I'm barren in a casino. I don't know. I guess I'm best friends with him now. Here's the thing. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:10:38 You can lose, but you can't. You can't lose. That's the tunnel. Let me explain the tunnel, Caleb. Yeah, like, you could lose, but you can't. You can't lose. That's the tunnel. Let me explain the tunnel, Caleb. Yeah, like you could lose, but you can't. You get in the tunnel and you just go.
Starting point is 00:10:51 Yeah, you just go. And you win. I want a big cardboard poker chip for trivia. So he covers... Well, that's the thing. So it's not really gambling because Dana White technically
Starting point is 00:11:01 has more money than God and he's just like, I'll just keep playing. From a pleasure standpoint, what is next for guys like Dana White technically has more money than God and he's just like I'll just keep playing. From a pleasure standpoint, what is next for guys like Dana White? Where will he be in 10 years? How does he go to the next level?
Starting point is 00:11:15 Yeah, of rush. I think he starts hunting man. Think about it though. He's in God mode. He's going to run out of things to give him satisfaction. That would give me satisfaction forever. Having nine guys show up and have them sit down and he goes, what do you want to win? His tolerance is going to increase. He's going to need to
Starting point is 00:11:31 progressively... I'm down 70. I win a couple hands and start getting closer to being even. Then I hit two blackjacks in a row and I'm going crazy. Dana's throwing so many chips around and he starts... We're playing one hand, but then as you get down he starts like playing multiple yeah and i have no idea where we're not gambling it's not real gambling i know what he needs to do he needs to take two very poor
Starting point is 00:11:53 people and like and dingo fight them in the sense that they have to keep betting until they win or lose everything but it's not gambling though it's not actual gambling like i'm i'm i don't want people to think like it's not real gambling. It's not. But you can't lose. It's all his marker. I hit my second blackjack. Do we have time to do this today?
Starting point is 00:12:15 I will put everything in my bank account on this. No, you don't have to. You don't have to, dude. That's the point. It's a tunnel of chaos. So I just win? Yeah, i'll consider that i went to salt baes restaurant i hit my second blackjack i got like i got all the money back dana just goes i look i was like what just happened and he's like you wanted here you go and
Starting point is 00:12:38 just hands me a cat he goes and then he goes get out of here next up it's not good it's just like you just sit down in the chair. Did you ever put money in? Did you ever put money in? No. I took zero dollars out. Oh. That's what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:12:51 That's what he's saying. That's why you should have gone. I thought I was going to have to take out. It's because you're you. Oh. Life is so easy. Jesus Christ. You live life.
Starting point is 00:12:58 But it's not gambling. Because it's like the culture of winning is like everyone's rule. But you still. Will was down $350,000. Like he was, Dana and him were playing, and it took probably an hour and a half. We were sitting there, and he had to climb all the way back. I was never worried that I was going to have to come up with.
Starting point is 00:13:17 It's not real. When I was down $70,000, I was never worried that I'm going to have to come up with $70,000. I was worried that like Dana is going to take me to like a back alley, and I'm going to have to come up with $70,000. I was worried that Dana White was going to take me to a back alley, and I'm going to have to somehow atone for this. You're going to have to enter Slack League. Yeah, I don't know what I'm going to have to do, but I'm going to have to pay him back some way.
Starting point is 00:13:33 When really, I was like, I don't even want to be here. All that's going through my head. I was like, I didn't want to sit here. Why did you make me sit here? Black Jack! I'm in. I'm back in. Will was down $350,000?
Starting point is 00:13:46 Correct. So there was a chance he lost more trying to win that back. That's why 20 people a day kill themselves. I think you sound like you don't understand it. I don't know. Let me try to understand this. So if you say whatever the number, $10,000, if you lose, you double that, right? No.
Starting point is 00:14:06 No. No, he just keeps playing, but he has more money than God. This is the point, Shay, is it makes no goddamn sense. Yeah, and it's not a real thing because you have to obviously know Dana, and you can't just do that. Connections. And Dana probably has lost a lot over his life, you know what I mean? And Taylor has lost before, lot over his life. Like, you know what I mean? Like, and Taylor has lost before.
Starting point is 00:14:27 But, like, if you – it's essentially being, like, if you just stay there long enough when you have unlimited bankroll, you'll eventually get cards. I think it's – yeah, Dana probably lost a ton of money last night. And it's just, like, when he's up and down, like, when he was up, he just brings someone else along for the ride. Yeah. And throws you the winnings.
Starting point is 00:14:42 Yeah. And then he takes the losses on his own. And then it's like, I guess, worth it to him because he's got more money than God. I want a big cardboard poker chair. But Brandon, you got, would you say, eight and a half hours of sleep last night? Seven and a half. Did you really? About ten.
Starting point is 00:14:55 That's nice. Wow. That's worth it. I only got like six. And my pillow of all those hundreds was not great. That stinks. Yeah. Oh, man. My hundreds was not great. That stinks. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:15:05 My head was pretty elevated. I said I was going, and I chickened out because I thought I was going. And then 8 a.m. this morning, I didn't even know how it worked. You would have been really special to the foundation, just guilting me. I didn't. It's not real gambling.
Starting point is 00:15:21 That's the thing. I don't want people to think that's just how it works. It's just like a coin flip, and you play double or nothing, and you just play double or nothing until it goes back to nothing if you're losing. Correct. If I was playing with my own money, blackjack, I would play $25 hands. Correct. If I lost three straight hands,
Starting point is 00:15:39 I will never play another hand of blackjack for probably a full year. That's my typical blackjack. I wish Frank the Tank was in there just to reset his perception of luck. Oh, yeah. That's true. But yeah, there was like Austin won five grand. He just sat down and won the first hand and just got up. Who is the biggest loser that won a bunch of money?
Starting point is 00:15:59 Probably me. I'm a pretty big loser. You almost fucked it up. You kept playing. Yeah, well, that's Taylor. Taylor was like, you want to go play the side game? And I was like pretty big loser. You almost fucked it up. You kept playing. Yeah, well, that's Taylor. Taylor was like, you want to go play the side game? And I was like, yeah. So, yeah, total chaos.
Starting point is 00:16:14 So how was Stiney? How was Steve? It was good. Good. Really? I had met Steve. It's probably the douchiest thing you can say is I met, I saw Steve will do it we we like he was
Starting point is 00:16:26 like what's up man and i was like good to see you he's like we've met and i was like yeah we we met at dan balzerian's house steve will do it at dan balzerian's house wow oh that's a sentence tunnel of chaos stiny is just the worst spider. Yeah. He's like spider vibes but just like not charming or winning. Yeah. He was okay.
Starting point is 00:16:52 But yeah, I could see that. I mean, the good news is you guys are going to end up winning because now I just have a lot of cash
Starting point is 00:16:57 and I'm just going to win. Yep, yep. It's trickle down. Should we do Tunnel of Chaos in here? You are going to win. You are going to win eventually.
Starting point is 00:17:04 Yeah, something cool for the office yeah we're gonna do some wheels yeah it's gonna it's i'm carl marks like we will redistribute the wealth beautiful everyone will eat so that was what you were holding up there that was your tunnel of chaos winnings yeah and that was 20 23 three thousand dollars that's what that looks like yeah god. God damn. Yeah. Where's your little knot? I got it somewhere. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:30 Buried. Brandon, what are you feeling right now? FOMO? I'm just really well-rested right now. Yeah, that's good. That's better than money. That's good. Your health, your wealth. Yeah, not your wealth.
Starting point is 00:17:44 I got to listen to you guys talk about winning. I got to watch Kyle and Nick win last night. Yes. I got to see everybody win. You're the real winner because you get to see the joy in your daughter's eyes when you give her that Taylor Swift on breath. Forgot about that. I will.
Starting point is 00:17:58 You know what? I said yesterday I wouldn't sell it for any amount of money. I will sell it back to you. $20,000. By the way, the dozen was great last night. That was awesome. Shout out Josh Allen. Holy shit. What a pool. Guys, guys.
Starting point is 00:18:11 I called him. So people were watching Barstool Live yesterday. I was planning all week to have Brooks Koepka be the surprise guest because I wanted that moment where he comes out and Dave's like, fuck this. They have this huge rivalry. So it was like a surprise.. They have this huge rivalry.
Starting point is 00:18:26 So it was like a surprise. Brooks had moved his whole schedule. He had like a kid's charity, like cancer charity thing. He was like, I'll come late. I'll come for the dozen. And then it got ruined. MB told Dave that it was Brooks Koepka at like 4 o'clock. So we just scrambled. I called Josh at 5 o'clock and I was like, hey, crazy question.
Starting point is 00:18:44 You want to play trivia? It's 6.30. And he's like, I got a dinner at 5.45, but I'll move it up. And if we can leave at 6.45, I'm in. What a cool guy. And it was the NFL Honors. It was the NFL Honors. And he was like, yeah, man.
Starting point is 00:18:57 And then he came, and he was awesome at trivia. That's not awesome. I didn't believe it was actually him, because your backup to Brooks was Mark Blutman. Yes. Mark Blutman texted me. He was a huge sigh of relief. I can't believe it was Brooks, Josh Allen, or Mark Blutman.
Starting point is 00:19:18 What a move. He saved us. He was good. He was really good. Him doing long multiplication was a sight to behold. He was pulling pop culture answers, face mashes, weekend songs out of his ass. He basically won us the first game with his answers. I don't know if we would win that game without him. The question was how many days between the original Top Gun and Top Gun Maverick.
Starting point is 00:19:47 And he pulled out the white. We had the whiteboard. And he did a multiplication table for what it was, like 37 years times however many days. And me, Che, and Roan were just watching him do this multiplication table because my brain was broken. That was my favorite part of the night. And he was like 200 days off. Yeah. That's the quarterback. And we did the night. And he was like 200 days off. Yeah. That's the quarterback.
Starting point is 00:20:05 And we did the formula. And I started doing the multiplication. And I was like, shit, I'm not sure I remember how to do this. No, yeah. I got it. I got it. And he was like carrying the one and everything. And Gary Vee caved my chest in.
Starting point is 00:20:17 What happened with that? I chipped my tooth. I want to see. You did? Yeah. I missed it. I feel it. I don't want you to.
Starting point is 00:20:23 No, don't. Yeah. I didn't know Gary was going to be doing that. Ball of energy, that V. Yeah. I ended up respecting him a lot. How was the vibes between Gary Vee and Frank? They didn't talk.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Oh, okay. That makes sense. You guys were on fire. You guys, I mean, we had no chance. I don't think you missed a question. They had a perfect round, yeah. Did you miss a question? They punted on the last one
Starting point is 00:20:45 they gave to us yeah that's right they were just like we're not going to answer this you guys can fuck yourselves and get it wrong yourself yeah oh for the
Starting point is 00:20:51 yeah but you guys went two whole trivia matches without missing a question yeah just I mean Jeff
Starting point is 00:20:58 Jeff threw a softball I was like where's Rondale Moore from that was what the fuck baby I was so happy that came up because I actually,
Starting point is 00:21:06 when I got in the car with Josh to go to the trivia, like, we literally got there two minutes before we came on. He was like, explain the trivia to me. So I just went through it all
Starting point is 00:21:14 and I brought that up. I was like... Oh, really? If we win, we're going to go against a team where my guy KB, like, he's memorized
Starting point is 00:21:20 every NFL player's hometown. He was like, no, he didn't. And I was like, get there, you'll find out. Yeah. Hell yeah. Then you did.
Starting point is 00:21:28 And then when you did it, you could see in the video, I'm like, see, I told you. He's fucking crazy. Yeah. I mean, ironically, I don't even know where he's from because I think Fresno, but or some farm town in California. Yeah, it's a small one. I knew Jeff wouldn't give me like someone like Josh Allen. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:45 That was crazy. What's up with your sleepy eyes? Yeah, why you say sleepy eyes? You know, I drank on an empty stomach. Every time I drink on an empty stomach, I end up on my knees.
Starting point is 00:21:59 Crispy cream is the dude who gives me a modicum of love. Yeah, wait. We've got Kyle talking to the fan. I'm glad that leaked. That's the real me. That's who I am behind the scenes. You're pampered by that guy. You love that guy.
Starting point is 00:22:15 Trivia question. Who is that guy? He was at the last trivia show. He hosted us at Roofball. He gave us his home. Oh, shit. Come on, Anthony. Also, I finally met Sam Lauderdale. You what? Lauderdale was there. Lauderdale was everywhere.
Starting point is 00:22:29 He was there the night before. I didn't know you guys had a wrestling... At the last Chicago live event, me and him got into it. Like, actually. Yeah. Yeah, because Mike had to clear him. Again, he was like... He had to pass Mike Claring. Yeah. Yeah, because Mike had to clear him. Yeah. Again, he was like.
Starting point is 00:22:45 He had to pass Mike Claring. Yeah. Mike told me all about it. He's like, yeah, well, I had to have a talk with this Lauderdale guy. Yeah. He's like, how do I keep hearing? It's the nature of Lauderdale. It was the miscommunication.
Starting point is 00:22:54 It was miscommunication. Can you guys kneel how KB kneeled? No. Let's see. Are we all kneeling? Yeah, try. That was from doing home business with little toddlers. You've got to get on the floor and play with them.
Starting point is 00:23:04 Yeah, but that shit goes away. How long were you in that position, King? That was from doing home business with little toddlers. You've got to get on the floor and play with them. Yeah, but that shit goes away. How long were you in that position? That or guitar solos. Is that where your feet flat out like that? Yes. But can you do it for 10 minutes? Ah! Yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:13 That's what I mean. That was like a kind of... You don't play with your kids. I play with my kids. My kids are tall. Yeah, they're tall. Who's up next? I'll give it a try.
Starting point is 00:23:23 You've got to turn the feet out. Oh, no. I don't... Yeah, I'll give it a try. You've got to turn the feet out. Oh, no. Yeah, stay up. You can't get up because right here. And he's sitting on his fucking ankles, too. No, I could do this for maybe 20 minutes. And his feet would fly. Or 20 seconds.
Starting point is 00:23:41 It's like planking. Oh, you got it wrong. I don't know if I do. I was just not mic'd up the whole time. Are you hungover? Yes. You weren't mic'd up? Did he not have a mic up? In his shirt.
Starting point is 00:23:57 I'm the biggest doofus in the business. I'm a tumbling tumbling dickweed. What are you talking about, man? You should have been MVP. You should have been MVP. I only got like three right. Friends of MVP?
Starting point is 00:24:13 Wait, that didn't look right. I heard some crazy cracks. Yeah, yeah. That didn't sound healthy. Jay? Get your kneel. Get your kneel. You limber like that?
Starting point is 00:24:24 This is the Asian squat. How'd you likeber like that? He's the Asian squat. How'd you like carrot top? He was the man. He was great. He said he smelled good. Smelled wonderful. Oh, nice. Oh, look at him.
Starting point is 00:24:32 That was easy for him. Where's Pachuli? Yeah. Oh. Yeah, he said the girl's name that he gets his Pachuli from, but I forget. All right, rich boy. Give us a Neal. Give us a Neal.
Starting point is 00:24:43 Give us a Neal with your rich ass. He's got those He does yoga He'll be A-OK This is what I was doing Last night You used to like this? Oh yeah
Starting point is 00:24:52 That's easy for you No problem for you Of course Wow What's your workout routine? You know on Titus' Wikipedia It says he's 6'6", 250 What?
Starting point is 00:25:02 That was my plane size Yeah I've lost weight and height You got shorter I got a little shorter Yeah It says he's 6'6", 250. What? That was my plane size. Yeah, I've lost weight and height. You got shorter? I got a little shorter, yeah. How do you stay in good shape? You strike me. I do yoga and stretch.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Oh, really? I can see that. That's pretty much it. Rowan, I feel like you've bounced back since yesterday. That feels like 10 years ago. That's crazy. Actually, I have an announcement about that. Okay. So I talked to my wife,
Starting point is 00:25:28 and she, after like a long conversation, she said that she is cool if we move to Chicago. What? What? No, I'm fucking with you. Fuck you. You fucking did. I'm fucking with you guys.
Starting point is 00:25:45 But I'm going to be in Chicago significantly more often. What if we build a tunnel of chaos in Chicago? A tunnel? What if it's a tunnel from Milwaukee to Chicago with a high-speed rail or some shit? And all you do is win money. Yeah, and there's money in it. And we can just grab money. That was mean, what you just did.
Starting point is 00:26:03 Yeah, it was. Because I kind of knew that it was going to be a sink. Yeah, we all knew. I mean, I've been shitting on you for an hour after your life was crumbling yesterday. Maybe we deserve it. No, no, no. You've apologized. You're like, oh, I'm sorry that we were mad.
Starting point is 00:26:14 I did feel bad. I don't give a fuck. I wasn't pissed off at anybody's reaction. Yeah. I was like sad at things changing. Yeah. No, I mean, your life got more difficult. Yeah, but I mean,
Starting point is 00:26:25 what's travel? What's travel? Aside from the potential championship, give me another silver lining. And seeing us more. Cheese curds. Seeing you guys more. Man, I also,
Starting point is 00:26:38 man, I miss Sass. Don't you guys miss hanging out with Sass? So maybe I could bring Sass out more often. More often. I feel like that would be nice. Brandon, I feel like didn't really miss Sass. I feel like that was kind of a... When I hanging out with Sass? So maybe I could bring Sass out more often. I feel like that would be nice. Brandon, I feel like didn't really miss Sass.
Starting point is 00:26:47 I feel like that was kind of a... No. When I said you missed Sass, you let out a lion-sized yawn. No, I'm just yawny right now. You got all that sleep, though. Seven and a half still isn't a lot of sleep. I'm going to sleep tonight. I'm sleeping forever.
Starting point is 00:27:02 When's that? Yeah, I'm sleeping forever. I might die tonight, yeah. I'm sleeping forever. I'm like, I'm like, yeah, I gotta sleep. I love sass. I mean, sass are boys. I know. That's what I thought. I'm a fucking brother.
Starting point is 00:27:12 That's what I thought, and then I saw you yawn. I'm sorry. I was yawning off camera. If you had to say it. Apologize to me, apologize to sass. Have you talked to Pat Bev today? Not to, or we've been texting a little. Or he's saying.
Starting point is 00:27:23 As he obviously is gone, right? He flew out last night. Yeah. There's actually a fucking great video on the Pepev pod YouTube and Rumble pages where he, like, it's like the full behind the scenes of everything that happened with the
Starting point is 00:27:37 trade, and he's, like, on, there's, like, two minutes of him on the phone with the assistant coaches in Milwaukee, like, talking about the ways that they're gonna, like, defend pick and roll and, like, switch on defense. It's just this crazy inside look at how everything has gone. He basically
Starting point is 00:27:54 was traded to be, like, Damian Lillard's protector. And to just, like... Like, because Damian Lillard can't play defense. Yeah. And they're just going to be like, Pat Bev will just play defense for two people now. Yeah, you'll play defense. And he has, like, a lot of defensive, like, philosophy and strategy
Starting point is 00:28:10 that he understands at a pretty high level. I love that. And still on the youth. So, I mean, I think he's fired up. He's waiting on campaign to take his physical, though. So, like, he's tweeted out, campaign, take your physical so I can play tonight. He's trying to play. They have a game tonight.
Starting point is 00:28:28 You're putting a lot of slander on campaign's name last night. Because he sucks. No, he doesn't. Did I not say when Dave said he won it, did the Bucs win last night? No, they got smoked. Yeah, because they lost campaign. I told you that. Dave wanted to bet the Bucs and I was like, don't do it. They just lost the
Starting point is 00:28:43 integral part of their whole entire... Why the fuck was he going to bet the bucks? Because he thought he didn't realize post-campaign is going to be tough. No. The Sixers just get super hot when campaign takes his physical. Dude, campaign could give you 20. I also like when he didn't take his physical. He could also give you zero in like 10 shots, but he could give you 20.
Starting point is 00:29:01 I started getting like the fantasy of him not passing the physical and the trade getting voided. Are you still doing that? No, I let it go. I let it go. I've let nothing last. What a swing that would be. Going home after all the shit I talked? Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:29:15 Hey, Mr. Maury. Hey, Maury. Can we sit next to you? I don't want to sit next to him. It's going to be. I mean, the Bucs could win the title. I mean, it's more storylines. It's more storylines.
Starting point is 00:29:27 It's more excitement. Pat Bev's my guy. It's good for the pod. I'll follow him wherever, whatever team he's on. Also, you've got to think about it this way. If it's a Bucs-Celtics Eastern Conference final like that, you'll be able to enjoy it more than if it was Sixers, Celtics. If the Sixers lose that, it's like a double whammy for you.
Starting point is 00:29:48 Double whammy, for sure. And let's be honest, Sixers would probably lose that. So now you have a chance to slay Dave, but also not have to be so invested. But if Pat Bev wins and the Sixers won together, that would be tunnel of chaos. I know, yeah, yeah. That's my tunnel of chaos. Yeah, that would have been tunnel of chaos. That would have been true tunnel of chaos.
Starting point is 00:30:04 It would have been incredible. But I gave myself 24 hours to be a little bitch about it, feel better about it. I've embraced whatever the fuck's going to happen. Super Week's just not kind to you. Oh, my God. I might just go get wet again just for fucking shits and giggies. By the way, we're brought to you today by Mango RX.
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Starting point is 00:31:07 and we are making sure we will have Cane's at the barstool party. So we're going to be doing the gambling cave from Chicago. We will have Raising Cane's all Sunday. You already know that we will order tailgates on tailgates. They're hand-battered, cooked-to-order chicken fingers, buttery Texas toast, and, of course, their crispy crinkle fries, all of which is perfect with their secret recipe cane sauce. Go to RaisingCanes.com and check it all out
Starting point is 00:31:30 to make sure that you have your order in time ahead of the game Sunday. Just remember to get it early. They'll be closing 30 minutes after kickoff to watch the game. That's awesome. Todd Graves, man of the people. Satisfy your canes fix today. There really is no other option. It's 60 and sunny in Chicago right now.
Starting point is 00:31:52 Yeah, it sounds beautiful. I feel like we missed the best week of weather. Because it's going to get a little bit colder again. But how's that possible? It's nicer in Chicago than Vegas. We're in the desert. In the desert. What's been going on in the office?
Starting point is 00:32:03 Is Nicky Smokes still raiding terror in your guys' office? Yeah, Nicky Smokes is just roasting all of us. Is he? Yeah, he did a video. He roasted us. I don't know if he roasted
Starting point is 00:32:13 you guys. Yeah, he did. He did? You guys were in that video? He trained me as a dwarven man. He treated you as dwarven? He did?
Starting point is 00:32:21 He did like a scenario where he acts as one of us or someone else acts as one of us. Yeah. And you were a dwarf? That was Zaw. Zaw was playing me. Oh. That was the punchline.
Starting point is 00:32:36 That's kind of a come up in some ways. I was fine with that. Nicky Smokes takes shots. I like it. Yeah, I love it. He tries. Zupi did a really good Jerry. Yeah, I love it. He tries. Zoopy did a really good Jerry.
Starting point is 00:32:48 Yeah, I saw that. You can play it, TJ, if you can find it. Yeah, it was a good Super Bowl week. I feel like the only thing that happened that was bad was Lucas getting demoted. Oh, yeah. Jerry was really upset. Rightfully so. Really upset. I saw the bullet points, but what are the details?
Starting point is 00:33:05 I saw the handouts. So, yeah, the backstory is Lucas, after Jerry After Dark, Lucas is supposed to make a compilation video, like a highlight video, and Jerry saw him at the blackjack table at like 1 in the morning on Wednesday night or Thursday morning and was like, hey, you going to get that video? And he's like, yeah, I got it, no problem, no problem. He just stayed at the blackjack table, didn't get the video out until like 2 o'clock the next day. So just walked all over Jerry.
Starting point is 00:33:31 So now Lucas, he was going to suspend him, but that's a punishment on Jerry himself because he's suspending his producer. Lucas got demoted to Ryan's role. Ryan got promoted. Wow. Ryan will take advantage of that. What a coma for Ryan. Yes.
Starting point is 00:33:45 It was part-time like a month ago. I know. And that sucks because Ryan's role was basically clean up the puke, rebound the basketballs. But Ryan is perfect because Ryan doesn't, like, Lucas I think has a little bit of I want to be a star. Ryan does not. He's just a grinder.
Starting point is 00:34:01 He's probably the nicest dude I know. Yeah. Yeah, Ryan rules. This is awesome. So that was kind of the only, like. I dude I know. Yeah. Yeah, Ryan rules. This is awesome. So that was kind of the only, like... I don't want to brag. I saved Ryan's life two nights ago. What?
Starting point is 00:34:10 Yeah, you did. What? What? Huh? Jay, you were there? No, but I heard many stories. It was right after I left. TJ, you were there?
Starting point is 00:34:16 Do tell. Is Ryan here? Huh? He's here. I didn't see him. He's going to be here, like, two nights. Really? Oh, okay. So... What? He was playing... We were playing roulette with He's going to be here, like, in two minutes. Really? Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:34:25 So what? He was playing, we were playing roulette with, it was me, Jerry, maybe Jeff or something like that. And Ryan was behind us. And he just, like, completely lost consciousness. Really? What? It was like some kind of, like, we didn't know if it was passing out or, like, if it was, like, a seizure or something like that. But he, like, went down on the casino floor passing out or like if it was like a seizure or something like that but he like went down on the casino floor and like there was nobody like jerry's like wrong what do
Starting point is 00:34:50 we do like what do we do and i like cradled his head started giving him like a a sternal rub and he wasn't coming to and i just like for 30 seconds just gave him like a sternal rub to like and eventually i can kind of like brought brought him back to before like paramedics came. What was it? What? So it wasn't that big of a deal. This makes sense in the fact that I was always waiting for like what Ryan is like the perfect barstool behind the scenes guy.
Starting point is 00:35:21 Like he's hardworking. He laughs at everyone's jokes behind the camera. He's so nice. He's so nice. But I knew there was something. You needed a defense. He's just a pass out guy. He just passes out.
Starting point is 00:35:35 I would rather him be mean and not win. But it sounds like he just passes out. He's a pass out guy. And it kind of makes sense if you look at him like he's a little too skinny. Yeah, it makes a lot of sense. And I feel bad. He should get demoted. He can't be passing out like that, dude.
Starting point is 00:35:54 I feel bad because he was like embarrassed about it. But that happens to him often. Yes, he was like, but this has happened to me before. He's a pass out guy. He's like gone out like that. That's what he does. He's a pass out guy. He's gone out like that. That's what he does. He's a pass out guy. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:36:06 He's now the pass out guy. It was too good to be true. Yeah. You just never know when you're going to lose him. He's going to pass out right in your face. I didn't hear the paramedics. Jerry said he thought he had died. But the paramedics, or there was paramedics that came,
Starting point is 00:36:21 and then the security like probably five minutes after he's just laying on the floor uh then the paramedics came like a single woman paramedic came and she kind of did most of the work and then like the full ambulance crew with like the stretcher and he how'd you know she was single she didn't have a ring on it brother but uh it was uh i knew it was i knew i did a good deed because I woke up the next morning with a DM from Abe Miranda. Oh! Calling me a hero for what? Wait, he was there?
Starting point is 00:36:54 Oh, yeah. I mean, people, everybody saw it. Abe was everywhere. God Cousin. God Cousin was there? Yeah, he was everywhere. God Cousin and God Uncle. Yeah, he's that.
Starting point is 00:37:03 He introduced himself to me as brother. God Brother? No, he said, hey, I'm Frank's brother. Is that himself to me as brother. God brother? No, he said, hey, I'm Frank's brother. Is that the guy we bumped into on the street? Yeah. You guys want to guess his Abe's dad's name? Yeah, Fonzie. Fonzie.
Starting point is 00:37:16 Fonzie? You ruined the game. Oh, fuck, I thought you were... I forgot we knew that together. No, you were there when Jeff made us guess. So that was a collective really. Fonzie Miranda. What a legend.
Starting point is 00:37:25 God uncle. And they say buffet collective really good. Fonzie Miranda. Fonzie Miranda. Legend. God uncle. And they say buffet in their family. Buffet. And so I couldn't stop saying buffet to him. Buffet? How was the buffet?
Starting point is 00:37:34 Yeah. Beautiful buffet. Couldn't get enough of him. Oh, Frank and his God. Frank was giving out numbers on the roulette table last night, too. Frank was giving out fucking absolute heat. He was like, I have no luck. And then he was just like 31 hits and everybody goes crazy.
Starting point is 00:37:54 Kyle, you saw Frank give Jenks and Mikey Betts two hours of PTO. You would have thought they had just won the Powerball. Wait. It was a sight to behold. Frank was like, I'm going to go do my own thing. And they, like, wept. They threw their hats off. They, like, chest bumped.
Starting point is 00:38:13 It's like when we defeated the Nazis. It was much like that. Just kiss and learn. Why did he just give them two hours? Gave them two hours to themselves. What'd they do with it? They just, it didn't matter. They just had two hours.
Starting point is 00:38:34 He's probably tired of them. Too much, too much, you know. Yeah, no, Frank, that definitely is a dynamic that will happen where Frank's like, why are you guys following me all the time? Let me breathe. Good for them. Two hours. That's huge.
Starting point is 00:38:50 Yeah. Hope they had fun. Yeah. So that was their vacation for this year. Yeah. I just had a great time all week gambling with Che, though. Che's such a fun guy to gamble with. What was your earliest night?
Starting point is 00:39:01 I know TJ was gambling with Che, too. Earliest night, like like back to my room? Yeah. Like 1.30. I've gone to bed after three every day this week. What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:39:10 Wow. But on the table it's still pretty late. I feel like I just lived completely the opposite. I went to sleep at like nine o'clock. Yesterday was my first
Starting point is 00:39:17 night past midnight. Yeah, because we have like, I was scared of losing my voice because we've been doing so many shows. Fair, fair. Yeah, my voice is a little raspy now.
Starting point is 00:39:25 I had a great time. I played TJ's first time shooting craps. We played for like two hours. That's awesome. A lot of fun. Did you get put in work? Yeah, I played craps with Rone's first time playing craps the other night. I put in no work.
Starting point is 00:39:36 Good time. Could have used a little chaos. Yeah, but I'm just the guy that likes to be around the mix and playing roulette, blackjack craps. Somebody, one of our coworkers has to be very down money-wise, right? Did everybody win? Somebody has to be around the mix and the playing roulette blackjack craps somebody one of our co-workers has to be very down money-wise right did everybody win somebody has to be someone has to be tremendous yes peyton put a hundred dollars on 17 wasn't even paying attention to the spin and it hit who what's her last name i don't get how people do that like i'm gonna put 100 on one number yeah it's crazy somebody's brandon you've been quiet are you sneakily down i'm not down but i'm not up i'm well yeah in the barstow world you're
Starting point is 00:40:13 down then i'm down yeah yeah but i've been tied to my wife all week i haven't gotten to i i had maybe one 10 minute stretch where i was able to get on a blackjack table and that was it. Then she came out of the bathroom. I've just been going to wonderful dinners every night with my wife. How many cuts of red meat have you had this week? You're fucking corny. Actually, I'm way down because every dinner
Starting point is 00:40:39 that you take your wife out to is $300 to $500 every single night. I'm probably down a couple grand right now. Yeah, this sucks. How many cuts? How many cuts of red meat? All right. There he is.
Starting point is 00:40:52 Oh, my God. Oh, I'll do it. Never mind. Ryan. Ryan, come here. I got one question for you. There's a mic right there. So I was saying that you're like the perfect hire at Barstool because you work hard.
Starting point is 00:41:12 You laugh at our jokes. Very likable. You're very likable. You're competent. You're everything I want in a guy around, right? Here, sit here, bro. Sit here. Yeah, why don't you sit?
Starting point is 00:41:24 But, so... You want some water? You're a pass-out guy? So, it's happened three times. That you're a pass-out guy. You're a pass-out guy. I have a third time. Pass-out guy.
Starting point is 00:41:39 Third time's a label. How many times? What's the time frame of the three times? First time was at a church in that was probably like 2015, 2016. Okay, so yeah, your three pass outs in the last like eight years? That just might have been God talking to him.
Starting point is 00:41:56 Yeah, something like that. That could have been. Alright, then what was the second one? Another one was at a Wiz Khalifa concert. Okay. The yin and yang. And then this last one? And then this last one, yeah. So when the paramedics, like, Roan saved your life,
Starting point is 00:42:10 and then the paramedics come, did you tell them, like, hey, listen, I'm just a pass-out guy? No, they thought I was having a seizure, though, so I was like, no, it's not one of those episodes. Like, I've never had one, so I know, like... I knew, like, what was happening just because I felt it in the head kind of thing.
Starting point is 00:42:26 I tried to sit down and try to, you know, just take time and, you know, just try and let it pass by and not really make a scene of things. Yeah. So did you know it was inevitable or sometimes you do beat it? There's times where I have beaten it. Oh, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. So do you know, is it like an actual medical condition or you do beat it? There's times where I have beaten it. Oh, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true.
Starting point is 00:42:47 Do you know, is it like an actual medical condition or you just pass out? I don't know because, like, there's been a time where I've celebrated with my buddies, like, we jumped up in the air, planed off because he made a hell of a shot and he hit my elbow and, like, my brain would just, like, just die off and, like, go, like, blank.
Starting point is 00:43:01 I don't even know. Elbow graze will do that. It was just... You got a kill switch on your elbow? I don't know. It was one of those where like I just got super lightheaded depending on wherever he hit me.
Starting point is 00:43:12 Sometimes I'll bump my elbow with my brain shut. Genuinely. I don't know how to explain it. It's just a thing. Whatever medical condition may come of that. They were saying it's maybe dehydration
Starting point is 00:43:24 or even like I got, a little wet towel, got it on your neck. Yeah. That was making you feel better? I mean, that was definitely a huge factor into the case. I mean, I had energy drains and no water throughout the entire day on Wednesdays. You got to stop doing that.
Starting point is 00:43:35 Yeah, no, it was bad. It was bad. That's on the promotion, though. Yeah. I mean, that's, yeah. I did also see you in the gym that same day at, like, 7 a.m. Yeah, right, right, right.
Starting point is 00:43:43 So, I mean. You were getting it in? I definitely, like, try and, you know, hydrate as much as I should. I mean, in terms of like, because I always knew there had to be a catch with you because you can't be perfect. Yeah, yeah. Being the pass out guy is not the worst. No, it's the. You can wear an elbow guard.
Starting point is 00:43:58 It's a helmet. Shut your brain off. It could be a lot worse. It could be a lot worse. I'm surprised you haven't passed out doing one of those long, long Jerry After Dark streams. I mean, it's because I'm always moving. My knees aren't locked up. Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:10 I mean, that's kind of part of the reason. Okay. But Jerry didn't know. Like, you hadn't alerted anybody that you could be a pass out guy. You were holding this for us. Yeah, you kind of have. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:20 That's fireable. It doesn't happen, like, that often to where, like, I mention it on a daily basis kind of thing. Right. But it is always on the table with you now. It's definitely possible. You do it on the table? No. Yeah, because you stand, like, completely erect in the corner for the rest of the show.
Starting point is 00:44:40 Hey, that would be good content. If you want, I can. No, no, no, no, no. The show ends when you collapse. You should do a Jerry after talk. Yeah, that's the one. That's it. Everybody has to see you pass out.
Starting point is 00:44:54 Just standing on camera, just completely straight. Jerry has to just stay up and wait with a kit. Come on, Ryan. Oh, fuck. All right, well, thank you, Ryan. Congratulations. I'm happy you're okay. Yeah, it's good that we know this now so we don't freak out. Yeah, Ryan. Oh, fuck. All right, well, thank you, Ryan. Yeah, thank you. Congratulations.
Starting point is 00:45:05 I'm happy you're okay. Yeah, you're the man. Yeah, it's good that we know this now so we don't freak out. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Pass out guy. Sorry for putting your business out there. It was too funny, though.
Starting point is 00:45:15 After you were alive. I knew a pass out guy. I had a friend who was a pass out guy. They occur in the wild. It happened all the time. I've never encountered a pass out guy. Yeah, I had a friend who would just, like, he played on one of my softball teams, and it would just be like, sometimes he just wouldn't be there.
Starting point is 00:45:28 Like, what happened? He'd be like, oh, he passed out at work. Did you ever hit him in the elbow? No. That's got to be it. I'm glad I learned the sternal rope, because I had another friend who was a pass out guy. He passed out at, like, a Drake concert, and I was, like, freaking out, because we were underage drinking, and I just started bitch slapping him until he woke up.
Starting point is 00:45:46 Full wind up like slapping the fuck out of him. That would have been tough to have done to Ryan. Ryan. What a good dude. The man.
Starting point is 00:45:55 I'm happy he's got a promotion. And a little kink. I'm happy he's got a thing. Yeah. Probably should get him to the doctor. Definitely. That does feel like
Starting point is 00:46:06 that might be it. If he hit his elbow celebrating a golf Yeah, Ryan. I would like you to go to the doctor to maybe just check it out.
Starting point is 00:46:14 All right, okay. Let's do that because I'm surprised he hasn't. It's funny, but it's not. Yeah. You just broke some news to him.
Starting point is 00:46:21 Oh, there's a doctor that could be. Never occurred to you before? I mean, it's nothing that it's like I've never thought of it being a serious condition. Yeah, but we should do that. We should get you to the doctor. Can you drive? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:35 Oh, shit. He said yes. Yeah, we'll get you to a doctor. We need to make sure that it's not something actually bad. Yeah. No, sure it's not. It would be funny if they just diagnosed him as a pass-out guy. It's all the time.
Starting point is 00:46:53 TJ, are you a pass-out guy? You're a sleep very heavy guy. Really? I never passed out. I passed out after giving blood once. I passed out off sleep two or three times.
Starting point is 00:47:07 What's your deal with the times you didn't come in to do the show and you said, listen to my alarm and that whole setup? My alarm is like a doomsday device, but I sleep heavy. I stay up too late. That's Tagalog. Good point. What? We can't hear anything
Starting point is 00:47:25 alright the listeners heard sure yeah did I tell you guys too I had a crazy experience yesterday so the
Starting point is 00:47:36 Roger Goodell's staying at our hotel who me and Dave's hotel and we've been like tracking him like hunting him I missed him by like two minutes in the gym multiple days
Starting point is 00:47:47 because I just wanted to get a video of, like, Dave, like, getting on an elliptical next to him. So we weren't saying it out loud. We said it out loud on Barstool Live yesterday. I get back to my hotel room, and there's two guys standing outside my hotel room, and they're like, hey, we're here just doing random checks for the Super Bowl. And my hotel room is under Dave's name. That's what it is yeah yeah wow and i had like a momentary like heat flash like i was like 15 again where i was like i don't have drugs but do i have drugs like
Starting point is 00:48:17 i was like holy and then they went in and checked why i was like do i legally have to allow you no yes that's but i had nothing to hide. They checked your room? You could have allowed them at a hotel, I think. They worked at the hotel? One was Wynn and the other didn't have anything on. Oh, wow. I don't think you have to. Yeah, it was like that.
Starting point is 00:48:39 Literally when I got back. As soon as you said it. As soon as we said it. I would have bludgeoned them. With what? Words. Yeah, with verbal assault. With facts.
Starting point is 00:48:50 With facts. With facts. With facts that he doesn't know about his own team. Players. Hometowns of... Yeah, but it was... I mean, you guys
Starting point is 00:49:00 probably been in that situation where, like, if you get pulled over or something, you're like, I don't have drugs, right? Every time I go through TSA. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:07 You just like for some reason, part of your brain is like, wait, I don't have drugs. I coughed up my trunk to a gang of cops because I was driving weird. What do you mean? I was driving legally, but in weird patterns. What do you mean? I was listening to music, so I drive around, turn around in parking lots, do laps.
Starting point is 00:49:28 They pulled me over, three cops, and checked my whole car. Holy shit. And now I realize that some cops will plant drugs. Yeah. Could have been fucked.
Starting point is 00:49:38 Imagine if they planted something on me. Oh my God. I watched them check it, so yeah. Should have filmed them. Should have. planted something on me. Oh my God. I watched them check it, so, but yeah. Should have filmed them. Should have. Long Island audit style.
Starting point is 00:49:50 Yeah. You guys ever watch the audit videos on like TikTok? Yeah. That fucking rule. I love slash hate those guys. I don't even know. Those are the guys
Starting point is 00:49:57 that just walk into random places and are like, I'm allowed to film? Yeah. That's the worst. They just walk into a police station
Starting point is 00:50:03 and are like, I'm allowed to film. They just go in just to get... The biggest dickheads. ...the police mad at them. But there's also, like, a new wave coming in their birth of people who think they know their rights
Starting point is 00:50:12 and actually don't. Like, you can't legally pull me over. And the guy's like, yeah, I fucking can. Yeah. You're a cop, you have to tell me. Yeah. Exactly. High Noon?
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Starting point is 00:50:44 Oh, yeah. Even pocketed one to go on the way out. I did, too. I just sucking down high noons at that trivia event last night. Even pocketed one to go on the way out. I just was enjoying them so much. The El Prez Pack is one of the best deals in all of beverage. A 12-pack, limited time. And if you look for Dave's face on it, you can scan the QR code on the pack
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Starting point is 00:51:58 thank you for the sponsorship um while we're walking around the casino you get recognized once when i was saying hey what's up all that stuff one guy late last night was at a slot machine i'm walking by with jerry and uh i walked by and he goes hey che and he goes he's like i'm a big pussy eater too that's kind of heartwarming yeah it's like dapped him up and that was the end of our interaction. It's got him. It's gross.
Starting point is 00:52:27 Slime. Both eat pussy. Would have thought we'd have that in common. It was a thrill. I like how it's like eating pussy is becoming like being from a super small town. Dude, you're from that part of Wyoming too? Yeah. The secret society.
Starting point is 00:52:48 That's fucking crazy. No way. I never meet anyone who eats pussy. Next time a dude's talking about eating pussy, I'm like, wait, do you know Steve? No fucking way. Oh shit. Oh shit.
Starting point is 00:53:02 I fucking know a guy who does a show where he eats pussy six degrees of pussy eating every pussy eater can get back to Stephen Shea through a pussy oh I ate this pussy ten years ago and then
Starting point is 00:53:21 yeah someone else ate the other pussy you know that guy? Oh, yeah. Still a good friend of mine. You should create a shirt that's like an Illuminati shirt that's not, obviously you can't wear a pussy. Well, you could wear a pussy eater shirt. Doesn't it look like a real graphic?
Starting point is 00:53:37 Yeah. Some kind of like secret symbol. It's a mathematical correct. Really? Yeah, you're like the Elks Club. Oh, I like that. Or what is it?'s the uh mason no freemasons freemasons yes yeah freemasons oh you can kind of use that yeah turn it upside down
Starting point is 00:53:51 yeah there's a fork and knife on either side that's the shirt yeah that's all it is that's pretty good tuna fish on top yeah secret club oh man it's been a good week i feel like we've had really good yaks too Yeah. Secret Club. Oh, man. It's been a good week. I feel like we've had really good yaks, too. Yeah, just yucking it up. This set has turned out to be great.
Starting point is 00:54:13 Thank you to Ashley. This couch is so comfortable. I know. It's so comfortable. Brandon's been rubbing it the entire time. It's so nice. You think they'll send it to my house? Yes.
Starting point is 00:54:23 Probably. I do. Do you need a new couch? Yeah. I haven't furnished my, I haven't got a couch yet. What? I was thinking like. How long have you lived there?
Starting point is 00:54:30 When I get home, I'm going to, I have an old couch. But when I get home, I'm going to go buy this couch. Get a fresh Ashley. Unless they'll just send me this couch, which. Get you a fresh Ashley. Affordable. You'll get my address, send me this couch. Yes.
Starting point is 00:54:43 Thumbs up. Oh, wow. She did give me a thumbs up. Ashley is great. My old couch was Ashley. Yeah. get my address. Send me this couch. Yes. Thumbs up. Oh, wow. She did give me a thumbs up. Ashley is great. My old couch was Ashley. Yeah. I love Ashley. It's great stuff.
Starting point is 00:54:53 Is this an ad read or are we just talking? I'm also ready to go home. Might as well do the ad read. I miss my kids. Yeah. I'd like to go home too. Great quality stuff. On trend.
Starting point is 00:55:01 Comfortable and affordable. Perfect seating to watch the game or gaming with your friends. I love my Ashley couch. Incredible couch. It just goes everywhere with you. You take it on the road with you? Yeah, yeah. Pack it up, put it in your pocket.
Starting point is 00:55:14 Put it in your car. Ernest, tomorrow, 2-9. They're hosting an amazing talent all week. Ashley's popping up at the Dog House of Resorts World. And this week, if you're in Vegas for the big game, you're going to want to head over to the Ashley House, check them out. You can check out our code BARSTOOL, and you can save online at ashley.com because, like we said, perfect seating for the game for your friends.
Starting point is 00:55:38 They got Hardy playing on Saturday night. Come on now. We had Cooper Allen last night. Oh, yeah. How was he? You chilled with him yesterday. Yeah, he was great. Good guy. Velvety voice i always miss the like i feel like friday and saturday when the parties pop off and i always go home yeah but same time you want to go home oh so badly yeah
Starting point is 00:55:56 this has been the trick for for me this week i've been this has not been vacation for me it has been my wife's vacation yeah she's been but that it up. It's good for her that I get her out of that house. No, but it's good for you because then when you get home, it's like you're just on vacation. Who's watching your seed? Huh? Her mother. Yeah, so everything's taken care of that way, but like, I'm just...
Starting point is 00:56:18 I get back to the hotel room and I just want to nap. I just want to sleep. I just want to die. And then she... That's when we go out and eat the red meat. You've been scaring me. I just want to sleep. I just want to die and then cheat. That's when we go out and eat the red meat. You've been scaring me. I just want to sleep forever. I do want to sleep forever right now. Yeah, I'm the same way. When I get this couch at the house, I'm going to just lay down on it
Starting point is 00:56:33 and take a nap. It's going to be awesome. Rone did the ad read. It goes to him. I've already got the thumbs up, though. Ashley over there? We're both in Milwaukee, so, I mean, we can fight over it. I've never met her. Jordan?
Starting point is 00:56:50 Jordan? Jordan's back. Oh, my friend. I can't remember names. Oh, you can't give him the couch. I can't remember names. I told him this morning, didn't I say I can't remember names? I just can't remember names.
Starting point is 00:56:58 You said you never met her. You said you never met her. That's not a name thing. I met you. I meant to say. You can't give him the couch now. No, I got the thumbs up. Burn the couch.
Starting point is 00:57:09 Everybody here won $20,000. I can get a couch. I didn't win shit, Brandon. Not everyone. You won a poker chip. Not everyone. Dave won $25,000. Dave won $90,000.
Starting point is 00:57:24 Not everyone won $20,000. He wanted to win 100. So it's like he didn't even get there. Me and Chay didn't win nothing. We'll say yes. He gets the couch. You weren't even upset about losing trivia. No.
Starting point is 00:57:35 I told you. First of all, we played great. We scored 13. We just lost. You guys didn't miss a question. You left it all out on the field. Yeah. We played fine.
Starting point is 00:57:45 You lost your edge. There was low stakes. There was no real stakes. And I don't mind losing to you guys. It's the other people I don't like losing to. I don't like losing to the cheaters, and I don't like losing to idiots. Do you like losing to us? No, I don't mind losing to y'all.
Starting point is 00:57:58 I don't mind losing to y'all. You guys are my friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The rest of these people in this godforsaken company can fuck off. Yeah. Obviously, you don't even learn their names. Jordan. Jordan. Like that painting, or that
Starting point is 00:58:13 photograph of him and Iverson that you guys are going to put up. That's Kobe. That's Kobe. Oh, that's Kobe? Yeah. It's Kobe. Who won't sign it. Yeah. Never say never. Did you see the statue they put up of him? No. He's in the Argentine Roman Marines.
Starting point is 00:58:28 They made him a little bit more jacked than the actual picture. There's like a side-by-side of the picture, and they took some liberties posthumously with his delts. That's statue number one, right? There's two more coming. Really? That's what they're saying. Is he in the arena?
Starting point is 00:58:44 He's getting three statues. I mean, he had two numbers. There's like a side-by-side All right. If you're going to go three, you might as well go five for all the rings, right? So then, does Chicago have to build six for Jordan?
Starting point is 00:59:00 So he's only got one. Yeah, but his is iconic. They did a great job with that one. People are saying the Lakers are statue merchants. That's what they're saying. They're just. Mid-season, an in-season tournament statue? Yeah, they're just pumping out statues.
Starting point is 00:59:14 Is it weird, like, if you have a statue and you just go look at it? Like, Nick Saban has a statue. I would show by my statue. Yeah? Definitely. You know who that is? I'd have, like, a picnic. Where do you think the Joe Paz statue is?
Starting point is 00:59:28 Oh, Ravel probably bought it. Yeah. For sure has it. Dismembered his bridge. But it's got to be somewhere, right? It was like yo-yoed. They like put it out, took it back, put it out. Hush, hush.
Starting point is 00:59:38 There's rumors of people. People know where it is, but they don't know where it is. They'll never tell you. My last kids buy it. Try to find it. I think there's like 10 people in the world that know where it is. We need a national treasure. is they'll never tell you I think there's like 10 people in the world that know where it is
Starting point is 00:59:46 we need a national treasure we need Nick Cage to find the Joe Pops I'll have a bold take I think that statue is going to go back up eventually you think so?
Starting point is 00:59:54 yeah what do you think it'll take? I think it'll take more time but I feel like there'll be like a time period
Starting point is 00:59:59 where people are like wait maybe he didn't know I bet you they made it into rings and sent it to rings. They made it into rings and sent it to like some kings. Wonderwall.
Starting point is 01:00:13 KB Vibecheck? Turned to Nazgul's. Vibecheck? It's good. Okay, yeah. I love Vegas. I love this city. I don't know why people hate it it's a lot people say they how do you hate gambling i think it's overstimulating it's like either you either like
Starting point is 01:00:33 it or you don't do it but who's like oh i fucking hate every second of this yeah i'd agree with that losing yeah but that's part of i just exactly don't like the layout yes it's a lot. Losing, yeah, but that's part of it. I just exactly don't like the layout. Yes. It's like... You don't? There's things that are close, but they're not... I still don't know where things are. I can't...
Starting point is 01:00:54 I keep getting lost in my hotel. There's that hotel over there, and there's that hotel over there. Some of them are connected. I think the Uber's driving in a totally different direction, but then all of a sudden I'm right at it. Nothing makes sense about... There's like an intentional confusion. There's kind of a totally different direction, but then all of a sudden I'm right at it. Nothing makes sense about...
Starting point is 01:01:05 There's like an intentional confusion about it all. There's kind of a vortex to it. Yeah. I don't really know what's going on. Yeah. New Orleans, however, is a beautiful, incredibly laid out city. That's exciting. Their setup is nice.
Starting point is 01:01:18 Gotta get on it right away. I'm excited for New Orleans. We spent six days in New Orleans for the Final Four a few years ago. I remember the last day, I was like a sausage that needed to be poked with a fork. And I just walked away from my hotel for seven miles and then walked back. Wait, does that explain Mincy? Yes. Dude, you can't.
Starting point is 01:01:42 He spent his life there. New Orleans, you can't be healthy. And it's always wet. You're always wet. Yeah. Yeah, we were there in the middle of summer. It's just the wettest place in the world. Unbearable.
Starting point is 01:01:54 Brutal. Yeah. I love it. It's going to be great. I love it. Oh, yeah. Do you have him doing the... Look at him.
Starting point is 01:02:04 Throwing an absolute. Absolutely. Yeah, do you have him doing the... Just sort of... Look at him. Throwing an absolute... Absolutely. That's only getting fucking fucked. You wearing a shirt that says Rams? He looks good, though. Why? Yeah, he looks great. Yeah, he does. Frank the Tank in those jerseys yesterday was so funny.
Starting point is 01:02:25 Yeah, so the jerseys were a little snug. I think Jeff got them from a new Chinese source. Mine was an XL, tight. Frank's was an XL. Frank's, yeah. Yeah, it was a little snug. He looked like Carly Lloyd. Just like wearing it up here.
Starting point is 01:02:48 Wait, we have Mincy workout videos. Really? Yeah, he was doing the whole thing. A video of Mincy getting absolutely destroyed. Destroyed.
Starting point is 01:02:58 He does look a lot better, though. Yeah. It's great. Him and Frank. Yeah, Frank is a beast. Come to Barstool, you get in great shape. Frank might get a seat.
Starting point is 01:03:06 We'll watch what your peak power is. Whoa. Oh, baby. Start that lawnmower. Oh. This is all in preparation for his big halftime performance coming Sunday. Have you approved that one yet? I don't think there is approving.
Starting point is 01:03:31 You're just going to let it happen? Yeah. When I first watched this, I was hoping he just didn't pick it up. Look at him. All right, Mincy. Breathe, breathe. Monster. Oh.
Starting point is 01:03:51 It's definitely not how you're supposed to put it down. Oh, sure. Sniper. Good on him, though. No, he's going to failure. That's what I mean, yeah. Oh, look at him here. He's working out, man.
Starting point is 01:04:10 Oh, I don't think that's how the machine is supposed to look. It is. That's an incredibly difficult machine. What a beast. Yeah. I swear to God, people come to Barstool and get hotter. No way. Who hasn't?
Starting point is 01:04:28 Me. That's not true. Brandon did. I've gotten... I went downhill. I'm fatter. Yeah, but your face looks better. Kyle got hotter.
Starting point is 01:04:39 Your hair looks better. Kyle's way hotter. More in shape. Titus, I think you can only go down. I went down for sure. Can we talk about your picture-taking face? Come on, man. What?
Starting point is 01:04:47 Yeah, dude, you're doing that on purpose. What about it? Go to... Did Will tweet it? Yeah, it's every picture you take. Every picture. This is my face, bro. Oh, that's...
Starting point is 01:04:56 Look at the camera. Look at the camera right now. See? No, no, no, no, just... No. Oh, you... Look at you. You piece of shit asshole. Fuck you. Oh, he's doing the blue smoky eyes.
Starting point is 01:05:13 Smoky eyes. I did that on purpose. No, like Will. We're getting ready to take a picture, and Will's like, do the face, do the face. And I tried to lock it in a little more. So the group dinner photo, you didn't try to lock in the face, right? No, that was just my face. That was just... That's my face.
Starting point is 01:05:36 The second one's worse. That's my face. Look at the... Dude. That feels like 10 years ago. I got a bad edit, because we took like four pictures, and the other three... What do you mean you got a bad edit? You look like... Your jawline looks like a bike seat.
Starting point is 01:05:47 You're sucking in your cheeks. The other three, I'm smiling. That was just like, I turned to the camera real quick. That was the first one we took. You guys, stop making fun of me. I like this. This is like, I feel like I'm on the last day of a bachelor party, just like chilling with the boys.
Starting point is 01:06:09 Yeah. Busting each other up. No, I'm stuck to that. I'm going to do it every time now. Yeah, you got to. I'm just going to. People demand it. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:17 You're getting the couch. What's her name? What's her name? Jordan. Okay. There we go. Spell it. Spell it.
Starting point is 01:06:22 Oh, why would I ever need to spell it? You're not going to save her number? The thank you note. Oh, yeah. You're right. J-O-R-D-A-N. Wrong. Keep going.
Starting point is 01:06:35 You have three girls in the Chicago office. Yeah. Stephanie in your department. Wait, people keep calling Stephanie the wrong name? Oh. Brandon? What do you keep calling her? Because I saw her tweet the other day.
Starting point is 01:06:51 She's like, names have been called girl over there, like Rachel. That's all from Brandon. Rachel, didn't you? No, I always get the syllables right. I called her Jessica a couple times. Oh, no. The syllables right? The amount of syllables? One time, I called her syllables.
Starting point is 01:07:06 I was like, syllables. That's closer to Stephanie. I'm doing three syllables. Stephanie Mad Dog and... Oh, my. The blonde-haired girl. Oh, Megan Make Money. That doesn't count.
Starting point is 01:07:22 No, the one... You know who I'm talking about. Kenzie. What about Paige? Paige McKenzie. And starting February 16th, Caitlin Walker. Wow. Oh.
Starting point is 01:07:35 Our basketball team is getting so good. Yeah. She's headed up. She's running point. Yeah. She's going to be. She's a hooper? No.
Starting point is 01:07:43 I was joking, Steven. I was a joke. You guys ball? Amazing. Yeah, this is like a bachelor party. Like, yeah. I do struggle with names. I hit it for a while, but I struggle with names a lot.
Starting point is 01:07:59 Sorry. Just learn it and don't forget it. No, I do. I'd love to do that. Stephanie's one of those people, like, she does a lot of stuff. She does, and she's great. She works under Stephan. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:08 That's the female version of Stephanie. Y'all got to understand, if I'm sitting in the Stephan part of the apartment. If I'm sitting in my living room and I'm looking at my eight-year-old, I will call him every other name but his. I'll call him Tommy. I'll call him every other name in my house but his.
Starting point is 01:08:19 And I'll forget it. And I'll have to look at him like... But you also know, like, every wrestler from the last 18 decades Explain that I can't Care about what you care about I love when Dave calls Stefan Stefan
Starting point is 01:08:33 That's great Stefan I love the running bit of Dave never knowing who Corey Rutledge is No matter what He's been with us forever He asked me again yeah At Hank's show He's like who the fuck is that what's that voice and i was like remember the lions fan that you like shit on he's like oh is that yeah he's like oh that guy he also you guys weren't there but uh mook's luck he just dave pointed to kyle who's a redhead and
Starting point is 01:09:03 he was like mook and i was like you're so close to knowing who Mook is. Kyle and Mook are close. I understand, but that's just Mook's luck to have Dave know that Mook exists. Yeah. I think that's a win for me. Yeah, he knows the name Mook, yeah. Yeah, he's in the Rolodex up here. Acknowledgement in any type.
Starting point is 01:09:23 A known name or Dave being like to Kyle Hey, who are you? Yeah. You claim him as one of the top five or six Kyles at Barstool? What do we got? Kyle Enright? Do we have any more?
Starting point is 01:09:39 We do, we do, we do. Tims? Kyle Tims. Did Kyle the social, did he leave? No. That's Kyle Gelling. Is he still here? Yeah, he's good. Kenzie.
Starting point is 01:09:52 Mad Dog. Mad Dog. Stephanie. Stephanie. Paige. Yes. Maggie. Yes.
Starting point is 01:10:01 Yes, so we are in the top five. The new girl that Kyle thought he met. That I said Happy New Year to. Yes. Yes. Show me the top five. The new girl that Kyle thought he met. That I said Happy New Year to. Yes. Yeah. When she just said, happy to meet you. Yeah. Oh, Joe.
Starting point is 01:10:13 Joe. Joe. Joe. Joe is not her. But Joe also works there. Alyssa. Alyssa. Maggie.
Starting point is 01:10:22 Like, your team? All your guys? I know memes, but their names, I look at them. Pug? And I try to think of them, and I just sit there, and I can't do it. You can pick out Pug. If you saw Pug, you'd know Pug. They're all the same guy.
Starting point is 01:10:39 They travel in a pack, so you can just blanket. Yeah, they all do kind of dress the same. It's tough to learn someone's name after it's been long enough when you should know their name, because there's no safe way to ask it. Right, same. It's tough to learn someone's name after it's been long enough when you should know their name. Right. Because there's no safe way to ask it. Right, right. What's his name? Oh, that's John Kelly. Okay, good.
Starting point is 01:10:51 That's John Kelly. Yeah. No one forgets John Kelly. The fakest name in the world. We've traveled together. CIA agent John Kelly. We've been to Wyoming together. Traveling with John Kelly is crazy because people are so confused when I'm the one on this side of the camera.
Starting point is 01:11:03 Yeah. And I see John Kelly. Is that my son, John Kelly? The hottest dude we got. Oh, you went to Starkville on this side of the camera. Yeah. And I see John Kelly. Is that my son, John Kelly? Yeah. The hottest dude we got. Oh, you went to Starkville, didn't you? Yeah. He went to my home.
Starting point is 01:11:12 I don't know. He's disgusting. What was that face? Did you like Starkville? You did go to Starkville. The abject disrespect. Like, oh, John. We went to London together.
Starting point is 01:11:20 Which did you like more? Starkville has the hotels with the outdoor hallways. He has an answer. You almost hit him. No, I was just like, I was looking to see which one he was going to answer. What'd you say, boy? What? Huh?
Starting point is 01:11:34 Huh? Say it again. Why are you hollering? Why are you hollering? I'm hollering. I'm getting tacos al gordo before I leave this conference. You have said tacos al gordo every goddamn day. I want it so bad. Yesterday in the car, you just kept saying tacos al gordo. Tacos al gordo. Well, this guy you have said tacos al gordo every goddamn day i want it so bad yesterday in the car you just kept saying tacos al gordo tacos because you said you wouldn't
Starting point is 01:11:49 go i thought i needed to go nap and i didn't even nap yeah exactly i thought a big boy like you i thought a top eater like you would eat it would go with me thank you for acknowledging me as top eater leo and i guess kyle tried to take that kyle didn't even did you even eat dinner last night no way he did not yesterday i didn't eat right i you even eat dinner last night? No way he did. Not yesterday. I didn't eat. Right. I forgot you're not a top eater. I think I'm a top eater. I went to every steakhouse. I did watch you get fed at Salt Bae's.
Starting point is 01:12:14 Was Salt Bae there? No, Woman's Salt Bae. This is Bae. You guys got fed. I don't know why I reacted like that. Every piece or just one piece? Every piece. First piece to make sure it was to your liking. Oh.
Starting point is 01:12:30 Two people actually fought over feeding me. Yeah, that was weird. A woman was, like, bringing it over, and a guy tried to, like, wrestle it away, so he could be the one to feed me. Very strange. She did not give it up. She wrestled it back so she could be the one to feed me. You look perfect. You're very feedable, like a baby bird.
Starting point is 01:12:44 I'm going to lunch today with PFT, Jersey Jerry, and TJ Watt. Ooh. We're going to make a video out of it. Yeah. It's going to be great. Jerry's finally getting. I mean, TJ Watt got robbed. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:54 But he's finally getting his meal. So we're going to video it. I'm sure that'll be all he wants. I'm sure that'll be the end of it. Yeah. Jerry can finally just let it go. Does Jerry have his number? I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:13:12 He was talking last night about it. He's like, I feel like we're friends, but I just don't, I can't get over the number piece of it all. So they DM on Instagram a lot. Okay. Yeah, that's Jerry's move. Yeah. Yeah, we had Max Crosby on today's show, and we had Jerry come out and read his DMs to him. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:13:30 Good or bad. Max was on his show. Yeah, Jerry was using Father's Day to try to get a free jersey. He was like, happy Father's Day, Max. Like, hope you enjoy it. Like, you know, being a dad is the best. And Max was like, thanks, man. And then instantly after, Jerry was like, hope you enjoy it. Like, you know, being a dad is the best. And Max was like, thanks, man. And then instantly after, Jerry was like,
Starting point is 01:13:49 hey, I got a friend of mine who really wants to sign Jersey. Can you get it to me? That's Jerry. He just goes off in the DMs. He got quote treated by Micah Parsons last night. What? Jerry? Yeah, shitting on him.
Starting point is 01:14:04 Saying what? He could pull it up to you, Jerry. Because Micah Parsons last night. What? Jerry? Yeah, shitting on him. Saying what? He could pull it up, TJ. Because Micah Parsons didn't win either. Right, but Micah Parsons is saying that Miles Garrett was the correct winner. Oh. Interesting. I mean, the Browns cleaned up. The Browns won four awards last night.
Starting point is 01:14:18 No. Look at this. So Jerry said, another NFL rigged job. Imagine looking at this and giving the guy on the left the award because he's never won it. It's Micah Parsons, Myles Garrett, and TJ Watt. And Micah Parsons said, horrible take. Myles is a better player. Reality of the situation.
Starting point is 01:14:32 Myles faced way more double teams. In effect on QBs. Fans, please stop looking at stats and look at film. Please. Two pleases. I don't know those stats. A lot of green for TJ yeah but do you guys disagree with
Starting point is 01:14:50 Miles? I do, I think TJ should have won it I think Miles Garrett was a lot of these awards are like when the media gets hold of something like Miles Garrett was incredible the first couple months and then it kind of didn't matter what happened the rest
Starting point is 01:15:06 of the way. He had already won it. This is exactly what Jameis1of1 does. And it'll spam, like, Jameis and Brady or Jameis and whoever the top quarter is. And he's right every time he does. The stats column. Every time he does it, he's right. You got some new
Starting point is 01:15:21 Bucks gear? I did. I can't show it because it's not the hat, but my friend Amy came by, and she works for the Bucs and gave me a Bucs NFC South Champions hat. Amazing. Very kind. Three straight years. Why can't you show it?
Starting point is 01:15:35 It's not a... 47 or 47 brand exclusive. I also got to wear her Super Bowl ring for a moment. That was a thrill. She has a Super Bowl ring? Yeah, there was a Bucs employee here, Steven's friends with, and I was trying to wear her Super Bowl ring for a moment. That was a thrill. She has a Super Bowl ring? Yeah, there was a Bucks employee here Stephen's friends with, and I was trying to explain to her
Starting point is 01:15:48 that if she really knew Stephen, she would want to know Stephen. Yeah. She agreed. What? Make me miss. Make me miss? What does that mean?
Starting point is 01:15:59 What does that mean? Make him miss. Try to make me miss. I'll do it. Miss what? Like throw it so fast you can't get it? Missed. Missed.
Starting point is 01:16:09 Would that count as a miss? That was a bad throw. In the NFL, would that count as a miss? A miss? I don't know. Miss isn't. That's an incompletion to you? Make me miss.
Starting point is 01:16:20 I'm going to make you miss. No, I'm the reception guy. Damn. That's not my move. First one to drop it, only one hand catches. That's not my... That's not his game? It's going to be a quick game.
Starting point is 01:16:44 That's going to be an easy one to catch. Oh! Oh! Oh. This is going to be a quick game. Oh. That's going to be an easy one to catch. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh, no. Wait.
Starting point is 01:16:51 Shea. Shea. Shea. I thought it was just you. Shea. That would have been a highlight. Shea. It's ball in the house.
Starting point is 01:16:57 We're playing ball in the house. Oh, I didn't realize it was a ball in the home. Everybody get a touch. Yeah. Everyone has to touch it. Everybody get a touch. Everybody touch. All right, I got to, yeah. One hand only. One hand only. I have to catch it. One hand only. a touch. Yeah. Everyone has to touch it. Everybody touch. Everybody touch. All right, I gotta, yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:05 One hand only, one hand only. I have to catch it. One hand only. Everybody touch. One hand touch, I have to catch it at the end. What are you about to do? No, no. Oh, hit it, hit it.
Starting point is 01:17:17 My bad, my bad, my bad. You didn't say tip drill. My bad, tip drill, my bad. That's me, that's me, that's me. No, it's this. too much too much force coming at you yeah you go up Get your fucking head in the game. Okay, lock in. Come on. Lock the fucking in, Jay. I didn't know he couldn't touch it at all until the end. It's okay. It's okay.
Starting point is 01:17:47 All right. Do we have to go in that order, or is that the right order? No, you can go in whatever you want. That order seems smart, though. Yeah, I like that order. You can only touch it last. Hold on. Then I'm worried about me to Jay to Nick.
Starting point is 01:17:57 Nick can go to Nick, and Nick can go to me. I can send it this way. I can send it backwards. Let's not plan that. Yeah, don't plan it. Let's just go. I actually don't like the planning. I'm not going to go to Brandon. Okay, do whatever you want. All right. Whatever feels right. I can send it this way. I can send it back. Let's not plan that. Yeah, don't plan it. I actually don't like the planning. I'm not going to go to Brandon. Okay, do whatever you want.
Starting point is 01:18:08 Whatever feels right. You said you weren't going to me! That was a joke! Everyone lock in. I'll be coming to you at any moment. Come on. Alright, I'm going to you, Brandon. That's my bad. I'm wrong. Sorry. You're good. I'm there. We're getting this. That's your bad, bro. Sorry. You're good.
Starting point is 01:18:26 I'm there. We're getting this. Let's get this over here. Yes. Fuck. All right. I kind of want to go to Che to just get it out of the way. Get it out of the way.
Starting point is 01:18:40 All right, I'm gonna go to Che. I'm gonna go to Che. I got hit. Oh. Oh. I got to hit it. Stop. Yeah. There we go.
Starting point is 01:18:54 Good work, boys. Good work, boys. That's your Super Bowl preview. That felt good, yeah. That's the Yaks Super Bowl preview. I could probably do that for hours. Hours. Dude, we are no different than dogs.
Starting point is 01:19:07 If someone has a ball, I'm just like, toss me. My favorite Frank moment was when we did that with the balloon. Yes. In the gambling cave. And we had it up for a long time, a very long time. And then he completely laid it on the ground and missed it by a hair. Oh, that was fun. Did we do a Canes ad yet? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:26 Yeah, we did. We did, okay. And we did Body Armor as well? Sure did. All right, so we're done. Wow. All right, maybe one more. For all the podcast listeners,
Starting point is 01:19:34 what we did was probably the coolest thing that's ever been done with a football. They had fun. They liked it too. Maybe Odell Beckham catch? Uh-huh. A what? Maybe Odell Beckham catch one.
Starting point is 01:19:44 Maybe Lin Swan and then us, yeah. Yeah, let's do it one more time. You guys all got flights. Some people had double hits. Let's do it one more time and then we'll spin the wheel and then we'll have a great ending to the action. One more time. One hit each, though.
Starting point is 01:19:59 One hit each? No doubles. Only one hit. No double hits. How many times is it going to take us to get this? And Kyle, you're catching it one hit? We'll get it on third. Sub five. We've got to get it within three. And I have to catch it one-handed.
Starting point is 01:20:09 Kyle's catching it one-handed. Everyone be ready. Then we do a castration wheel. One guy's a eunuch. I'm going to go to Che again because I don't trust him. Okay. I want it. Che.
Starting point is 01:20:24 Hey, go for it. Che. Go for it. Che. Hey, go for it. Go for it, Che. We're just not talking about Nick intercepting that first one? That's fine, though, but Che, like, I don't feel like Che will do anything to get this ball. Yeah, you are kind of, okay. All right. One hit, everybody. Che, what are you doing?
Starting point is 01:20:42 I was trying to go to Mark. Well, I'm going to miss my fucking flight. I should be at the airport right now. Go. I don't think you get it. This should be very easy, right? Oh, that one came at me weird. Titus.
Starting point is 01:20:56 That's me, that's me, that's me, that's me. That came at me weird. Here, you know what? Go to someone else first. Okay, okay. Go to someone else first, because I'm ready to make a play. Okay? I can make a play. Okay, I can make a play Now I might
Starting point is 01:21:10 Is this cheating if I just go on around? Yes. Yes. Yes Sure We made eye contact. Hit the ball. Jay. Eye contact. God damn it. We got to be outfielders. We got to talk. We got to talk. No, you have to just hit the ball. You don't have to talk. The ball is coming at you. Just fucking
Starting point is 01:21:36 hit it. I want to fight you right now. This shouldn't be hard at all. Me? Che? Move. Yeah! Yes!
Starting point is 01:21:50 Got it. Sub five. Sub five. Sub five. Che, redeem yourself. Way to go, Che. Way to make a play. That was bad.
Starting point is 01:21:57 Way to make a fucking play. There we go. All right, TJ. Let's spin the wheel. Wet would suck. I would not be happy with wet. Wet would suck. I would not be happy with wet. Wet would suck. It's not happening.
Starting point is 01:22:07 Zero percent chance actually. Yeah, we all have clothes and stuff. And there's Canes gear. There's bonus Canes gear. A miss about among the long around. All right. All right, what a week. What a week.
Starting point is 01:22:22 Thank you everyone for tuning in. Thanks to all the crew. Everybody that worked on the show the entire time appreciate you guys applause applause applause applause applause
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Starting point is 01:22:44 Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Applause Thank you to everyone who worked really hard this week. It wasn't the easiest. Never is with Super Bowl week. We will see everyone back in studio on Monday, including Ron. Yes, can't wait. Yeah. All right, see everyone. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. It's the act. It's the act.
Starting point is 01:23:12 It's the act. Bye, everybody. Thanks for watching this week. Have a good weekend. See you back in Chicago. Love you. Bye.

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