The Yak - The Wet Wheel Finds A New Victim | The Yak 3-1-22

Episode Date: March 2, 2022

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's the act It's the act Yeah, it's time to talk, shop, and do Yankee pop, it's the act It's the act On the day of my vacation, you guys dragged me in here. You guilt me.
Starting point is 00:00:49 You plead. I didn't guilt you. I said, are you actually not coming? Guilted yourself. No, Brandon guilted me. I did not guilt you. Nobody guilted you. You're that big of a pussy.
Starting point is 00:00:57 I said I wanted to go get pins. And then you said, are you seriously not coming in? I thought you were joking. I thought you were joking too. Everyone would have. Why would I joke about the Nick Tuesday movement? I said, are you seriously not coming in? I thought you were joking. I thought you were joking, too. Why would I joke about the Nick Tuesday movement? I said, are you actually not coming in today? And then you were like, ah, fuck, I guess I'll come in. We were just making sure because we thought it was a joke.
Starting point is 00:01:14 There was guilt in it. Everyone would have respected if you took the day off. You can leave now if you'd like. You could have guilted yourself. I was thinking about it. I'm taking a Nick Tuesday tomorrow. I'm taking a Sass Wednesday And Thursday And probably Friday too
Starting point is 00:01:26 Shit I know I cussed too on accident We're trying to do a clean show today Two minutes and 57 seconds I'm doing it You're going all the way Well mine was a quote You need one minority to walk in the door
Starting point is 00:01:40 Well I'm still going to get my credit jokes off Yeah yeah that's good That's good I was going to take my credit jokes off. Yeah, yeah, that's good. That's good. I was going to take today off, but I figured... Nardini texted me, and she's like, Nick, we need you in.
Starting point is 00:01:52 Time and a half if you come in on a holiday. All right, I guess I'll make, what? She texted me. $14 an hour. Wait, what? She's like, what should I say to Nick to make him come in?
Starting point is 00:02:03 I guess I'll say that. But the Nick Tuesday movement, first of all, people think it's selfish. I'm not meaning Nick is in my name. I'm meaning the verb. You're cutting a little bit out of the week. It just so happens to be my name and I happen to be the face. You're the face of it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:22 Of every pic in the montage. Yeah. Yeah. Stool pick in the montage. Yeah. Yeah. Stoolie Clubhouse did make a montage, but I'm still standing by Tuesday is the best day to take off. Why? You don't dread Mondays
Starting point is 00:02:34 because I think the reason people dread Mondays is because of Tuesday, and then it makes you have a short week when you come back. No, I think he's right, and I hate the fact that he's right. I think taking off on Monday or Friday is better because then you have a long weekend.
Starting point is 00:02:49 I dread Mondays because of Monday. No, no, no. You dread it because of Tuesday. You just don't know it yet. I don't. No. Here's what he's saying. Monday is the worst day, probably. And it's significantly less worse if you know you have the next day off. So you can go out afterwards, do whatever.
Starting point is 00:03:05 You can kind of putter through. I would argue that makes Monday even worse. No, you could putter through Monday. How does that make Monday even worse? I would argue that because you— You think Monday is better when there's a Tuesday that follows? You giant fucking moron. How would that make Monday worse in any dimension?
Starting point is 00:03:22 You break up a Saturday, Sunday, Tuesday with a work day. No. I would say that Wednesday. Monday sucks. It's the worst day. It's the worst day. It's the worst stretch of the first day of five straight work days. The goal is to always stack off days.
Starting point is 00:03:39 Stack off days. Imagine going into Monday knowing you don't have to work the next day. What, you love Mondays? Do you hate lasagna? No, I— The anti-Garfield? I don't love Mondays. I'm just saying I don't think your theory about Tuesday lessening Monday really holds—
Starting point is 00:03:54 Tuesday, definitely. You still— It's still in the weekend. Why do people look forward to Fridays, Brandon? Because you have the next day off. You have the next two days off. It doesn't matter. No, because Sundays is a day off. It does matter. It doesn't matter. No, because Sundays is a day off.
Starting point is 00:04:06 It does matter. It doesn't matter. It matters a lot. Think of how much, dude, there's a palpable buzz to Friday night. You have two days. Saturday, it's kind of like, I'm already a little scared. No. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:15 He's right. Friday nights. Saturday is like, you wouldn't get a weekend if you just had Tuesday. You still get your Sunday. You could have a Sunday. Saturday is like, yeah, a couple of stupid fucking times. You know that? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:26 That doesn't count. The ideal work week. Wait, what did you just say? I don't consider that a swear word. What? I said fucking. You said fuck too. The ideal work week is 40 straight hours starting Tuesday at noon.
Starting point is 00:04:39 That is ideal. No, you don't want that marathon. Yes, you do. This gives you a mid-week break. Owen's right, Owen's right. When I was in college, I had't want that marathon. Yes, you do. This gives you a mid-week break. Owen's right. When I was in college, I had all my classes on two days and then I had a five-day weekend every single day. You're not allowed to be in
Starting point is 00:04:52 this conversation. I think that a Wednesday... I don't mind Mondays working here because it's like we do the yak. Should we do your work week? We can't talk about ourselves. We don't have the –
Starting point is 00:05:08 We can't talk about ourselves. We can't. But I'm saying like a traditional work week. For us, I think Wednesday. You go in. I told you we might need you. You go in on a Monday. You answer your emails from the weekend.
Starting point is 00:05:16 You catch up. You have Tuesday off, and then you're not going to feel like you're missing out on a lot of work. You're not going to feel panicked. It's not going to pile up. You just missed a Tuesday, and it has the same sensation as a short week. I got to talk to somebody real quick. I told you we might need you because Nick wasn't going to be here.
Starting point is 00:05:31 Now you're here. Don't make him feel like that. We want him. But I told him I might need you because Nick's not here. No, he brings the diversity we need. We need a longer haired Owen. Then what am I supposed to do? Just sit there waiting for you to text me? Yeah, you were. I said I'll text you if I need you.-haired Owen. Then what am I supposed to do? Just sit there waiting for you to text me? Yeah, you were.
Starting point is 00:05:45 I said I'll text you if I need you. You never said that. You said, are you available for the Yaks? I said, yeah. I even asked Sass. I said, should I go get Rudy? He said, no, we don't want Rudy. Maybe he thought this one happened.
Starting point is 00:05:57 You said, should I go get other people? I could make the call. I'm the one who's... I'm the Yak guy. He's the Yak guy. You should be hosting right now. He said my... I'm the longest-running member. I am hosting guy. I'm the yak guy. You should be hosting right now. He's sat in my seat. I'm the longest running member.
Starting point is 00:06:07 I am hosting Nick Tuesday. But you never want to make the call. I want Rudy. I want Rudy. Well, we got Rudy. I made that call. Okay, don't act like it's some apprehensive decision. Everybody put their St. Patrick's Day t-shirts on the podium for Rudy one at a time.
Starting point is 00:06:23 That's right. I'm just going to model. What's with the flowers? Look how angry we all are. You know what would be awesome? If we all had today off. I know. I really want to take today off.
Starting point is 00:06:33 Did you guys want today off? It's Nick Tuesday. Nick Tuesday, Rudy. How could I forget? It's a big day. The best 14 days a year. How does one celebrate Nick Tuesday? What is the...
Starting point is 00:06:41 Come on. Friday is the correct answer. Where are all the Nick heads at? did this poll straw poll who made it me thursday just really oliver twish who the fuck made this somebody screenshot that and said who think about the person who made that emoji and i share a story with about tj real quick? Thursday is the last one, I guess. We found out, TJ, can you tell everybody on the Yak where your 13th birthday party was held? Who is this guy? Yeah, 2011, I went to Philadelphia Passion Laundry Football League game for my birthday.
Starting point is 00:07:16 For your 13th birthday? I don't know if that was, I guess that was 13. Did you bring a bunch of friends? Yeah, a couple friends. Only the close homies. Did you bring binoculars? Only the day ones. No, we were in second row. Really? You were in the the nosebleeds but that's the closer you get right getting nervous sunbank arena in trenton it's beautiful mary rose roach broke off for five
Starting point is 00:07:35 touchdowns i'll never forget it god damn five what's she up to i'd imagine the show highlights better looking uh she was like kind of a beast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who is that guy? He looks kind of like... I don't... He looks like a... I don't like how smiley they are. He looks like an evolved Tom Leigh. He's a white guy, so it looks like he works here.
Starting point is 00:07:58 He's an evolved Tom Leigh, or he looks like he's good at sleight of hand, but not a magician. So he just picked it up along the way? A rare crop of people. I'm excellent at sleight of hand, but not a magician. So he just picked it up along the way. A rare crop of people. I'm excellent at sleight of hand off what magic. You sure he's not a jinn? Will I get him? Yeah. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:08:13 Now? I'll at least ask him who he is. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Say who you. I don't trust you, though. Rudy, we're glad to have you here. Thank you. Appreciate it.
Starting point is 00:08:24 By the way I took A shave Yeah a fresh shave I was sick of the facial hair I'm in a weird place Brandon Brandon just pussied out so hard Oh man
Starting point is 00:08:33 Packs in the city just Oh wow they're important Oh they're going in with Wait Wait one of them went in with Erica But he wasn't with Oh Brandon He was there earlier
Starting point is 00:08:41 Come in boys They're asking They want to come in The guy's shocked that I'm here Oh, Brandon, you have. Come in, boys. They're asking. They want to come in. The guy's shocked that I'm here. He's like, wait a minute. You said he wasn't going to be here. I'm in.
Starting point is 00:08:53 There. I'm over here. I'm in. Come in. Come in. He's a British guy? We've never had a British guy on the team. Oh, no. Besides troops and expressions.
Starting point is 00:09:00 He's going to watch that back and through the run. He kind of looks like your guy's buddy, Chris. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah, a tiny bit. He's going to watch that back through the run. He kind of looks like your guy's buddy, Chris. Yeah, a little bit. Yeah, a tiny bit. He was British. Jesus Christ. I don't know what he did. Nicely feathered hair. Yeah, he somehow... Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:18 Nick, I went on 4chan. Yeah, you like it? Dude, it's... I've been trying to be on 4chan for a while. You didn't preface how much porn there'd be. Wow. Sorry? So much porn. There was one funny thing I came across, though.
Starting point is 00:09:32 This dude made a Venn diagram about how interracial porn is the only profitable porn subcategory. Why? It didn't make a lot of sense. He said on one side there's cucks who like interracial porn, and then on the other side was people who will pay for porn, and then in the middle was cucks paying for interracial porn. Yeah, I guess that's the only— And then below it he had a disclaimer and said, it's the same thing as how America convinced everyone in the world that they need deodorant.
Starting point is 00:10:00 They basically, like, manufacture desire for interracial porn. I think all porns are profitable. They don't really pay the women. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, you're just always. Didn't Mia Khalifa make, like, $15,000 in her entire porn career? I thought the women made a lot more than the men. She's probably got signed for the most.
Starting point is 00:10:16 I think gay porn actors make the most. Really? Yeah, because it's. Gay. It's just I think it's in higher demand because there's, I think, less gay people. Yeah. Yeah. So I think that they get paid the most.
Starting point is 00:10:29 Because I remember watching a True Life about it. You remember that show True Life on MTV? So it's easy to get into the black. I don't understand. If there's less demand, why is there more money? No, get the black into you. Sorry, there's more demand. Sorry, there's more demand and less supply.
Starting point is 00:10:39 Definitely not that. So get... Yeah. But there was a guy on True Life that did gay porn that wasn't gay, but he's like... No, he is. The paycheck is just... i would argue the second that you fuck another dude the very second yeah i'm truly he's like i'm not gay i do it for the money yeah yeah that was my experience on 4chan yeah yeah my favorite 4chan post is the guy that has a stain on his floor you're we don't know he has a stain on his floor.
Starting point is 00:11:05 He's just like, what do I do? And there was a shoe in the background that was the exact same size as the stain. They were just like, put the shoe over it.
Starting point is 00:11:10 Like, thanks. That was it. Yeah. Post of all time. That was a killer reference for a few people. But Rudy going on 4chan is like
Starting point is 00:11:19 Michael B. Jordan doing a speech in East St. Louis. Like, yeah. He doesn't belong St. Louis. Like, yeah. He doesn't belong there. Nice cameo, Rudy. He won't belong. Get out of here.
Starting point is 00:11:31 The only thing I know about 4chan is Pepe. Yeah. And how they destroyed him. They started there. It's like Pele going to a slum of Rio de Janeiro to teach soccer to some guys who have two limbs. Total. You're comparing me to those guys. You belong on 4chan.
Starting point is 00:11:52 You go on 4chan regularly. Yeah. That's not good. If your life had a screen time, how much of it would be on 4chan? You could probably see. A screen has a screen time. How much time have you spent on it?
Starting point is 00:12:05 No, it's probably less than half of my internet usage. Do you get karma points on Reddit? No, it's all anonymous. Okay, so we can't see your score? Yeah, no. Damn, that'd be cool. There's got to be. That'd be cool to see.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Is that a new watch? No. Oh. I usually just wear black, and it blends in with my arm. While I was gone, were the flowers explained? No. What do you have flowers, Kyle? I saw them.
Starting point is 00:12:28 I just snagged them off, poached them off someone's desk. Wait, really? Yeah. Somebody's about to get in trouble. We can make more use out of them. Why don't you go give one to a girl? That was the plan, was to have you boys divvy these out. Okay.
Starting point is 00:12:41 As you see fit. Should we bring the girl in to do it? No, I want to bring a boy in. Let do it or should we no I want to bring a boy let's do a secret camera I want to bring like a Zoopy in and have him having Zoopy
Starting point is 00:12:50 and force somebody to give it to a girl with a camera on them yeah I think that's a really good idea you want to make like someone else
Starting point is 00:12:58 give a flower to a girl wait is that her that's Mary Rose Roach you using Zoopy as a proper or common noun as a common or common noun? As a common noun.
Starting point is 00:13:08 Yeah, lowercase c. I played in the lingerie football league once. Oh, that's a cool celebration. Just as a sub. They called me for holding. Oh, she's a beast. Be a fire Halloween costume. Be old. That's not still going, is it? Nah. No, it's not still going is it Nah
Starting point is 00:13:27 No it's not Oh she could go Oh my god that explosiveness I like how they don't use Regular football helmets They just go with the old like 1980s hockey helmets They try to draft busts
Starting point is 00:13:43 That was good Thanks man That was good these hockey helmets. They try to draft busts. That was good. Thanks, man. That was good. That's why they pay you the big bucks. Yeah, you're right. I do make tons of money. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:56 I would love to go check that out. It's a shame it's gone now. It'd be a fun bachelor party with the fellas. Yeah, it would, but we're our 13th birthday with TJ.
Starting point is 00:14:04 Pretty much the same experience TJ. Jersey kids there. Think anybody has an OnlyFans where they run Oklahoma drills? Wow. There's usually like a clip per year in spring break. It's like a girl who does an Oklahoma drill on the beach and gets
Starting point is 00:14:21 concussed. One girl takes it way more seriously than the other girl. It's always a shot put girl. I'm talking about behind a ring light. Oh, yeah. The whole nine. I'm sure we could dig that up. 4chan probably has got that.
Starting point is 00:14:36 The whole thread. A lot of DeviantArt on there, too. You did not preface that. Why wouldn't I? Why would I? You expected him to tell you everything about 4chan i just expect so much nudity and i can see you oklahoma have a good i don't even know what that is it's pretty tulsa you know who's you know who's silently killing it
Starting point is 00:14:56 in tulsa is the is the hansen brothers a lot of a lot of people forgot about them. Mbop boys? They blew up in the 90s. Mbop, the like. They were monstrous. And then, unfortunately, they garnered a lot of hate from the 90s. You know the type that wore loose. Of course, Backlash, yeah. They were angsty. Angsty. Angsty.
Starting point is 00:15:23 Angsty. Or Banksy. Some of the more banks. Anxiety. Well, the one, Taylor Hanson, he has seven children. Is he the oldest? He's very involved in the Tulsa scene. Zach.
Starting point is 00:15:39 Philanthropy and the like. Are they Mormons? No, he just keeps having kids. He's only 37. Were they from Oklahoma? No, he just keeps having kids. He's only 37. Were they from Oklahoma or did they settle there? Tulsa. Nobody settles in Oklahoma,
Starting point is 00:15:51 do they? Oh, yeah. Sooners did. That's literally why they have a state. Right. The original settlers, yeah, settled.
Starting point is 00:15:58 That's how they got there. That's how they fucking got there. He says, your wife is a settler. People don't move. People don't transplant. Very true. Is Oklahoma like shitty?
Starting point is 00:16:07 It's not. Oklahoma's fine. Oklahoma City's not great. It's okay. It's fine. I would say it's shitty, yeah. Oklahoma City's shitty. Oh, shit.
Starting point is 00:16:13 That's where they bombed that. The Oklahoma City bombings were there. There's one guy. Granted, you could become a cult billionaire there. Isn't it run by some crazy white family? Oklahoma? adult billionaire there one of these boys run by some crazy white family oklahoma who's the richest person or family from oklahoma it's got to be well there's a newspaper guy skier bennett's seaboon pickens are they from oklahoma we're doing sass we're in that lane checked checked out because I saw Owen turn around rapidly and look behind him. I didn't know what he was looking at.
Starting point is 00:16:49 It's Enrique's crew. And I tuned back in during the Oklahoma thing. I turned because I couldn't hold back laughter at how funny their joke was. I think those guys are here to get rid of the shark smell. Let's call it a day after that. Oh, my God. No, it smells horrible. It's horrible in this office.
Starting point is 00:17:03 You want to give a flower to someone? I want, no, because people think it's KB doing a bit. No, I can't do it. You want to find a Zoopy? That's why someone like Zoopy could. I think Kevin Zoopy.
Starting point is 00:17:14 I think Rudy could do it. Oh, he can't. Oh, because they know he's on the act. They all cheered him on when he got brought up to the big leagues. It's true.
Starting point is 00:17:22 You told me not to bring him on today. It's not what happened, Brandonon you said don't bring rudy it's not at all what happened if it's true then pull up no that's what he said but it's cool up you said he's like a threat right like i said should i bring rudy in and you said you were like andrew schultz no i said should should we bring people in like rudy and all them and i was like let's just do us today. Rudy's a Toledo Mudhead. I mean, specifically Rudy. What's a Toledo Mudhead?
Starting point is 00:17:50 Is that a baseball team? Mudhead. Mudhead. Triple A. Retail baseball. Killing it in triple. Yeah. And hold up.
Starting point is 00:17:57 Yeah. No, I agree with that completely. He does batter balls. You're better than a lot of the Tigers. I told him at like 1030 to come in because I thought Nick wasn't going to be here. Why didn't you think Nick was going to be here and that's when I texted Nick Why didn't you think Nick was going to be here? You said you were
Starting point is 00:18:07 texting us You said you're not coming I said I'm out today Alright I didn't want to have to expose I can't believe I fucked up that Oklahoma joke so bad
Starting point is 00:18:16 What are you exposing? It wasn't funny It wasn't funny It wasn't funny I was kidding Yeah you actually did it Hey Nicky B-Walk needs
Starting point is 00:18:23 They're going to be ripping me apart Mujibah You're going to be ripping me apart. Mujib. They're going to be ripping me. It wasn't a joke. It was stupid. You were actually just a little mean to them. I said I had to go get pins.
Starting point is 00:18:31 I thought you'd go get pins with me. And then you said you weren't coming. What are you doing? Brandon, it's Nick Tuesday. And you said, is that real? I said, yeah, I need a day off. And you said, oh, ellipses. Guess the yak's going to suck.
Starting point is 00:18:46 Is that not guilting? Is that not fucking guilting? That is guilting. That's not at all what our interaction was. Alright, so, yeah, okay. Remembered, remembered. Brandon. Remembered. He didn't think you guys were in either. He thought it was just gonna be him. What's cool about that is it's very offensive
Starting point is 00:19:02 to Kyle. Yeah. No, it's not. How is it not? It is. Because when I host Pick Central and then I have to come back and host the Yak, I'm in Pick Central mindset and I never know how to do jokes around you guys and it's always awkward when it's just us. What's Pick Central mindset? I have to carry the ball a little bit more than I have to carry the ball on this show.
Starting point is 00:19:22 And then I – whatever. It doesn't matter. You need some load management. You need some load management. I need some load management. What time was that at? Probably about 11. And then that's when you went to the bullpen. 11.15.
Starting point is 00:19:36 When I came to you, yes. Damn, you were busy at 11.15. I think some of our best episodes don't have me. I disagree. That's not true, but I strongly disagree. That was cute. Do you have receipts, honey? Yeah, the entire show ran
Starting point is 00:19:53 for five years before I got here. And it was a disaster every day. It fought cancellation every single day. The Storm Chasers video came out yesterday and it is very good. It was almost like a blessing that they got kicked out of the first one. It just made for a The Storm Chasers video came out yesterday, and it is very good. Really, really good. Check that out. It was almost like a blessing that they got kicked out of the first one.
Starting point is 00:20:08 It just made for a really good video. Yeah. Those motherfuckers, though. They're in a gas station parking lot. So fun. That guy rocked. I know. I was cracking up at that.
Starting point is 00:20:18 Yeah. It was awesome. He looked a lot like Adam Sandler. Yeah, he kind of did. I think they might be headed towards... Something you never really want to be described as. Unless you are. The Adam Sandler.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Half the girls on the internet are like, oh, I want to fuck Adam Sandler. Yeah, they want to fuck Adam Sandler. They don't want to fuck some guy who looks like Adam Sandler. Reminds them of Adam Sandler. It would be funny if a guy... Because Adam Sandler gets to fuck because he has the personality of Adam Sandler.
Starting point is 00:20:42 Yeah, he is Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler has the look like Adam Sandler. Not even that being Adam Sandler. to fuck because he has the personality of Adam Sandler. Yeah, he is Adam Sandler. Adam Sandler has the personality of Adam Sandler. He's not even that being Adam Sandler. Yeah. Yeah. It'd be funny if a guy went out, like, dressed as Adam Sandler. He's just like, what the fuck, dude? I just cannot get laid.
Starting point is 00:20:54 Like, this is fucking bullshit. Everyone on the internet keeps saying that they want to fuck Adam Sandler. I have all the physical traits of Adam Sandler. He kicked me out of bounds wearing basketball shorts. Have you guys ever seen Funny People? Yeah. Yeah. It's a good movie. Is that the one where...
Starting point is 00:21:08 Fuck yeah, it is. Is that the one with Eric Bana, the Australian guy? Something you would either know for a fact or know for a fact. Yeah, you don't just kind of know if you're Eric Bana. I can't remember if that's his name. What the fuck are you looking at? Is this fact I wanted everyone to know I retained true? Okay, so the tertiary character in Funny People, that was Eric Bana.
Starting point is 00:21:30 That was Eric Bana, right? Or am I mistaken? So I know he was in Troy, and I know he was the Hulk. As if this is right, it's impressive. Well, this is the difference between- Actually, TJ, Google that. This is the difference between AAA baseball. I can run that play out there.
Starting point is 00:21:44 That play flies out. No, no, no. We all- My God, did you hear Brandon talking about Eric Bana? Brandon's guilty, I'm guilty. I'm guilty difference between AAA baseball. I can run that play out there. That play flies out. No, no, no. Brandon's guilty. I'm guilty. Nick's guilty. We all do that. Brandon and Che did it on trivia. They talked about guessing the answer when they didn't know every time. That's like their technique. They lay out all the information
Starting point is 00:22:00 that they have. Even if they get it wrong, some people are like, Listen, guys, I don't know the answer. Rudy! Rudy, even if they get it wrong, they're like, some people are like, yeah, there he is. Listen guys, I don't know the answer to this interview. Rudy, Rudy, what a pool,
Starting point is 00:22:08 Rudy. I know things. Rudy, what a pool. Guilty. Rude boy, what a pool. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:22:14 Was he the one who's like, dating the dude that Adam, or married to the dude that Adam Sandler is trying to, the girl that Adam Sandler
Starting point is 00:22:21 is trying to date? Yeah. I don't care, you, you. I didn't get a lot of sleep last night. You can... I wasn't either.
Starting point is 00:22:26 I was going to take Nick Tuesday as well. That's the thing. I want it to be... No one asked me if I was coming in, though. There should be a third weekend, and it should be Tuesday. Brandon, if Sass wasn't coming in, would you have texted him? No. He doesn't have his number.
Starting point is 00:22:37 He doesn't even have my number. Well, first of all, I do have your number. I don't have yours. Ooh. It's not saved. What's that? Okay. Yeah, I would... I think he would have said the show sucked for anybody. If we're down to four... What's that? Okay, yeah, I would.
Starting point is 00:22:45 I think he would have said the show sucked for anybody. If we're down to four, yeah, if Kyle had been out, I'd have been like, oh, fuck, the show's going to suck. If we're down to four people, I need more people. Without Big Cat and Roan, it's a show of role players. And when you lose one role player, you actually texted and KB, I don't know how you felt about this. You texted and said, Owen, are you hosting today? I did. Owen was going to host over KB, longest member of the show. I don't know how you felt about this. You texted and said, Owen, are you hosting today? I did. Owen was going to host over KB, longest member of the show.
Starting point is 00:23:08 I don't know why this is a thing. Owen famously hosted last year. Owen does have more host roles than me. He does. Owen famously hosted when he came back from L.A. He was the only one here, and he did a great job. He did a great job. Okay, well, Owen, you want to host today?
Starting point is 00:23:21 So I don't know why that's a problem. Rudy, I want to bring somebody in. Sounds like you're picking favorites. Who do you want to bring in, I want to bring somebody in. Sounds like you're picking favorites. Who do you want to bring in? I want to bring somebody in today. Brandon, I appreciate you. I'm just making sure there's no KB erasure. I don't want any KB erasure.
Starting point is 00:23:31 I just want to make sure KB has a high level of respect. Sometimes people take a little eraser to KB. Kyle has the utmost respect. Doesn't sound like it. Okay, now let me make a fool out of you. Let me turn you into some type of ruse. Why? Oh, it's payback. Rudy, why don't you go grab somebody?
Starting point is 00:23:56 A zoopy. Grab somebody? Somebody you see fit. Grab an upstairs fit. Grab someone who people wouldn't expect. Who you see fit. Like who you could see getting really into shape this year okay
Starting point is 00:24:05 and it can't be me or Kyle they're already shredded to death oh for two in the lobby oh I know oh bro
Starting point is 00:24:16 oh shit see that joke would have never happened without me here that's the thing he wouldn't have had the confidence to pull it off
Starting point is 00:24:24 let's get Frankie in Frankie looks a lot skinnier than I thought I'm going to slap him about me here. That's the thing. He wouldn't have had the confidence to pull it off. Let's get Frankie in. Frankie looks a lot skinnier than I thought. I don't know why everyone's saying that Frankie's fat. I hope nobody ever describes me like, ah, I like KB. I don't want to bring him in. I like him. Remember when Big Cat and Trent used to be the fat people here?
Starting point is 00:24:46 Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah. Why is he long? Borelli? Ew! Ew, bro. He knows he has to. Hell no. Fuck.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Yeah. So, right. You're a movie guy, right? Was it Eric Bana in Funny People? It's really sweet. It's really sweet. It's really sweet. Was he like...
Starting point is 00:25:04 You're good. I know it was Rogan, Leslie Mann, Sandler. Seth Rogan. I think it was Eric Bana. I don't know anything about that. I think it's Eric Bana. I think it's Eric Bana. Oh, well.
Starting point is 00:25:16 Very obscure movie and role. Yeah, who would know that? What's up? Not much. See the shark? Oh, yeah. I heard you gagging over that. Still doing that?
Starting point is 00:25:24 Back of my teeth now. Isn't that, like, illegal? Yeah, I don't think it's legal. Wait, are people accusing you of having a fat face? Yeah, you look good. You're not looking at you. You're not a fat man. That's all you're examining.
Starting point is 00:25:37 I'm just saying it's not. As you walked by and we were like, I don't know. This is why people have body dysmorphia. I don't really have a fat face. I do have a fat face. No, you don't. It's just not angry. I have a completely normal looking face. I do have a fat face. No, you don't. It's just not angry. I have a completely
Starting point is 00:25:45 normal looking face. It's, so I have a huge, not shredded by any means, fat underbelly neck here. Right? So when I do this, look at that.
Starting point is 00:25:56 And that's everybody. No, it's not though. Dude, when you look at that. Who's in armor behind you? I've got no turn. Okay. So would you describe it as, I'm an iguana. But I have that too. Everyone has. So would you describe it as. I'm an iguana.
Starting point is 00:26:06 But I have that too. Everyone has that. Would you describe it as below average, average, or above average fat face? Me? Yeah. Talk into the mic, Frankie. What the fuck? Would that be more of a soft jaw than a fat face?
Starting point is 00:26:18 I've never, I never grew up thinking a soft jaw. You're not fat. This is something new right here. And I have a guy that messaged me saying he can fix this in 30 minutes. Do you say it's- 30 minutes? You're going to freeze it? He's lying.
Starting point is 00:26:29 He can do something. He takes the salt out and pushes it into your clavicle. That's not- That sounds awful. That's not going to work. Can we look up that procedure? Who is this? Something about taking the salt out and they just-
Starting point is 00:26:40 What? Don't believe that. It's salt? I've seen people on TikTok. Because it's sodium? You can mold it back. It says it'll take 30 minutes, no problem. Oh, that's the same thing as Rick's eyes.
Starting point is 00:26:50 That's just a shyster. Rick's eyes got fixed, but now they're slightly... I don't know. Imagine the first guy that looked like that going into the doctor, and the doctor got to choose the name. He's like, yeah, you're cockeyed. What, man? I already have this. That's choose the name. He's like, yeah, you're cockeyed. What, man? I already have this.
Starting point is 00:27:07 That's not the name. Have you guys ever had a true interaction with Riggs? No. Yes. And how'd that go? Orly. How was it poor? There's photos of you talking to him at a party.
Starting point is 00:27:22 Yeah, it was at the Ellie Schnitt Valentine's Day Party 2019. The girls who get it, get it. If you get it, you get it. True. I remember leaving that, whatever bar that was, the Ainsworth maybe, feeling worse about myself. Do you directly correlate that to Sam? Yeah. He wasn't correlate that to Sam? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:47 He wasn't a dick to me. Oh, because he's a great guy. I love that he's... Talking to him makes you feel like you are his subordinate. He made me feel as uncomfortable as he could. Did you have an interaction with him? Yeah, just one.
Starting point is 00:28:01 I talked to a kid that worked at Pione a kid that worked at Piners like for the summer and he was like yeah like I met everyone like Frankie and Trent are super nice Riggs is a fucking asshole though I swear to god I swear to god I'm not gonna have you swear to god for that
Starting point is 00:28:22 I didn't say he was an asshole he's a good guy. I like rigs. No, I didn't say he was an asshole either. I was just saying what the kid told me. Yeah, that one. That very one. Speak of the devil.
Starting point is 00:28:36 Dude, foreplay. We just have bad photos of ourselves, man. What do you think that correlates to? What's the common denominator? A bunch of ugly fucking fat pieces of shit the weirdest thing it is the strangest thing we just for the life of us we just riggs has fired 10 photographers already fuck man rudy you were with me when that fat photo was taken you're in the photo it's probably the worst you've ever looked wow whoa whoa whoa yeah i mean i i don't
Starting point is 00:29:04 know why you had to do that. Because I'm just saying, we both didn't know how it happened, and all of a sudden it just, out of nowhere. You have multiple bad photos. Your thing is you can't, if there's a lens, you can't turn sideways. Yeah. Your side profile. They're not even bad.
Starting point is 00:29:20 Like, the photos that you're saying are bad, no one would notice. No, the one like a year ago was bad. My opinion. The latest one wasn't that bad. The moon face original one. Yeah, that was bad. Now it's not. The face was covered by, it's like someone was holding it up with just two fat fingers.
Starting point is 00:29:35 Yeah, it was like someone humanized Jabba the Hutt. He looked like a crystal ball. I just wanted to grab him. Look at the future. I found Riley. Everyone say hi to Riley. Hi Riley. Friend of the program. Yeah, good friend of the program.
Starting point is 00:29:50 We're going to have you get your flirt on today. And we have an undercover camera. The Zoom technology. Who's going to do the camera? He's going to have it in his other hand, I think. We're going to have you deliver flowers to people. We have one rule. You cannot laugh. You can one rule. You cannot laugh.
Starting point is 00:30:06 You can't laugh. You can like slightly smile. This is a fine line HR wise. You can't play it off like this is even remotely a joke. Does he have to lick his lips? Yeah, if they're chapped. You have to lick your lips once. Hand it and then lick my lips?
Starting point is 00:30:22 I think you just hand it and just be like, hey, this, somebody was selling them on the street for like, you know, eight bucks each and this is reminding me of you.
Starting point is 00:30:28 Say 20 each. Someone you've never talked to. Oh, okay. I can do that. Yeah, you can do that? Yeah. And you just gotta
Starting point is 00:30:34 brush it off like it's like some little thing. You got this for free. Should I go, should I do, like, producer? I think you go upstairs.
Starting point is 00:30:39 Why were you so scared? Upstairs, other side. I was like, you got someone in mind. Wait, yeah, yeah, go producer. You're locked in. So you guys are forcing me to go over to that table?
Starting point is 00:30:49 No, man. Producer? Actually, you sit upstairs. Yeah, you can do her. Go over to who you were talking about in producer. No, I have no one in mind. Yeah, whatever. You got someone in mind.
Starting point is 00:31:01 So here's what you're going to do. You're going to just go up, give it to them, kind of like default eye contact and say, hey, like I got this on the street for free. I guess I'll give it to you if you want it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:31:10 And then, yeah. And then I can do that. Yeah. Can we set Riley up undercover? Tell him I sent him a Zoom link.
Starting point is 00:31:16 Tell him to turn his Wi-Fi off. Turn your Wi-Fi off. Wi-Fi off? Yeah. He sent you a Zoom link. But Riley, you douchebag, you want to stick on
Starting point is 00:31:23 for the rest of the show? I don't think so. All right, bet, bet, bet. you a Zoom link. Borrelli, you douchebag. You want to stick on for the rest of the show? I don't think so. All right, bet, bet, bet. Get the fuck out. God damn. Shut up. That dude just flushed his career down the drain. Now he has to go fucking play golf every day.
Starting point is 00:31:39 Poor soul. All right, so maybe you practice on Brandon. Okay. Can I have the flower? No. You get the flower when you earn it? Yeah, what the fuck? What?
Starting point is 00:31:54 Pretend like you're holding it. You're walking way too... Okay. I think you should act like you kind of weren't expecting to see them at their desk. Okay. Go. And maybe try and cry a little little bit too that's good always a showman taking the long route hey how are you yeah this is a good choice rudy smiling too much though can't No, he's doing a very good job.
Starting point is 00:32:25 No, I think he smiles, and then he realizes in his head that he's smiling too much and shuts it up real quick. I just thought it would be a good day. Oh, perfect. That was perfect. That was perfect. Burn the flower. I just don't want the cameraman to be seen to ruin the illusion. Riley is the cameraman in his other hand, I think.
Starting point is 00:32:45 You think we should have another? I think it would be better to have the illusion. Riley is the cameraman in his other hand, I think. You think we should have another? I think it would be better to have another camera. Should we recruit another cameraman? I don't want to... What about Spider? It's hard to detect, or it's hard to not detect a cameraman. All right, I'm joining.
Starting point is 00:32:58 It needs to be someone who knows the angles. Yeah, I guess just film it yourself. I think it has to be him. Yeah, film it yourself. Act like you're doing a TikTok or something. something no no no it's worse just hold it slyly just go do it yeah that's actually well we got without us see if it works see if it's funny i bet it's funny yeah we got three tries at this through wax whoa oh sorry don't be sorry. Always sorry. Oh.
Starting point is 00:33:26 My life is sorry. Look at that. Oh. That's good. That's perfect. All right, so. Okay, yeah, just don't be obvious. Let me flip the camera.
Starting point is 00:33:35 Should I waistband it? Yeah, waistband it. Try that. Oh, well. Oh, that might be very obvious. No, it's not. Oh, that's just weird. I think you should probably turn the volume down on your phone.
Starting point is 00:33:47 Do you have AirPods? I do not. I'm poor. I forgot, yeah. I feel like Jeske would know the moves. It feels a little creepy in the waistband. It's like a crotch cam. No waistband?
Starting point is 00:33:59 Yeah. I think, yeah, maybe just have it in your other hand. Yeah, just hold it like people hold their iPhone. You don't need to. It has to be a clear angle as long as we can see it. Your leg is crazy. Oh, you can hear it? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:08 Ramping out right now? Got RLS, like a Goosebumps novel. Can you still see me, TJ? No, fuck. Oh, I turned off video. There we go. Say cheese and die, headass. All right, I'll go try.
Starting point is 00:34:26 All right. Thank you. Shout out R.L. Stein. Yep. Thank you. Yep. Yep. Good luck.
Starting point is 00:34:37 Oh. You know where you're going? This could, like, make or break. All right. Yeah, you could do something. Do a drive-by. Get a lay of the land. Nobody saw when he smashed the microphone into my face.
Starting point is 00:34:49 No, I saw it. What did he do? I saw it. He smashed the microphone into my face. He's going to Brandon's sister. Oh, God damn it. God damn it. That's free.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Okay. I just wanted to make sure you had a good day. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh my god We got two more Come get your second That was perfect That was amazing
Starting point is 00:35:20 Great choice Headshot Oh my god Here get your second Beautiful Fucking A Riley Love this guy That was amazing. Great choice. Headshot. Oh, my God. Here, get your second. Beautiful. Fucking A. Riley. Love this guy.
Starting point is 00:35:28 It's got to be someone you don't know. I don't know who she's with. Yeah, exactly. That was perfect. Don't have to explain anything to me. She was very happy. Probably made her day. Probably did.
Starting point is 00:35:41 She just moved out. Until she finds out it was a prank. Hey, you know how I said, you know how I implied that I was attracted to you? That was a joke. And everybody laughed. How could you believe that? What is that? Until she finds out how she got the job.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Oh, my God. It's all been a prank. It's a bold play that he decided to approach from behind. That's never a good idea. Was he like running when he was approaching her? Nobody's over there. He took a direct line. Go into the girl's restroom.
Starting point is 00:36:11 Yeah, go into the girl's bathroom. Oh, that would be so funny. Hey, I know you're pooping. I just like... He's walking fast as fuck. Why did he go this way? He's moving. Don't give it to the janitor.
Starting point is 00:36:23 No, no, no. Is he going to the control room? No, there's no women in the control room. There's no women in this. There might be one woman over here. No, there's one over here. You never said you had to give it to him. He's going to...
Starting point is 00:36:34 I just wanted to give you this. Kelly, Mark. Oh, my God. Thank you so much. It was really nice of you. All right, all right. He is killing it. I want him to go to a group of girls and only give one of the girls.
Starting point is 00:36:50 But hesitate. I think he should maybe take it back and give it to someone. I think you've got to go upstairs to find a pot of girls. I think he should give it to a girl and just be like, hey, can you give this to somebody else from me? No, that's perfect. And he is a killer. Is he running? I think he's sprinting.
Starting point is 00:37:08 He's walking completely normal. He's got to strut. He's got to strut because he's doing so good. He's owning the moment. He's got to really make sure he gets this one right. Again, absolutely crushing it. Great job. Perfection.
Starting point is 00:37:22 But one more task. We want you to go to a group or like two girls, maybe one girl sitting next to another. Go up to one girl and just be like, hey, can you give this to the girl sitting next to her? Okay.
Starting point is 00:37:38 We think you might need to go upstairs. It should probably be upstairs. Maybe you should go up, do a little circle around, come back down and get the flower once you decide. That's a good point. Do some recon work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Go scout.
Starting point is 00:37:50 Yeah, let's go scouting mission. The scout will pay. You're doing perfect. Remember, you do lick the lips, half smile, very nervous. Going at a great speed. You're going in at a great angle. You should be proud of yourself. Yeah, your approach play is fantastic.
Starting point is 00:38:03 His approach play is unreal. That's it, I needed this. An approach play is unreal. He said I needed this. And approach play is what? 40% of sealing the deal? 100%. Also, what he's doing right now. 100% that it's 40%? 100% that it's 40%.
Starting point is 00:38:12 This next move, he's doing a classic nagging technique. That's right. That pick-up artists use. Where's his? Oh, there he goes. Pay attention to the friend. Oh, Jordan Berry. Jordan.
Starting point is 00:38:23 She got off easy. Somebody's going home empty-handed. Where is everybody? It's Nick Tuesday. Deadass office. There's no one up there. That could have worked. This is a bad look.
Starting point is 00:38:36 The further you go into the corner, the more dudes there are. We just need two adjacent girls. This is back where Greer sits, isn't it? Yeah, there's no girls back here. There's no way. There was a woman. There was a woman. She must be new.
Starting point is 00:38:49 The upstairs. A meeting would work. Walking into a meeting would be great. Oh, unreal. We just need two girls. Let's get Riley fucking fired, dude. He almost went right into it. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 00:39:03 He hardly went anywhere. He only went left. Whoa, whoa, whoa. He hardly went anywhere. He only went left. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Let him go. He probably has an idea. No, he knows. He's seen what we didn't see. It's a sense game.
Starting point is 00:39:11 He also knows I think left would be all. Oh, Erica's office. And start watching. Could it be Erica? I don't think so. I don't think she's here. It's Nick Tuesday. I saw her like 20 minutes ago.
Starting point is 00:39:22 It looks. We got. What did it look like? In the mic. I have two options. The girls who are sitting next to me. Right. Get that out of your system.
Starting point is 00:39:33 Two girls, both sitting next to each other. Never spoken to them, never talked to them. Are there names? There we go. No. I don't even think I've ever seen them. Now, is there legal implications to doing this? Mr. Collins.
Starting point is 00:39:44 Yes. Retrieve your flower. Final rose. The duty is yours. Should he know their names, though? This isn't supposed to be like, could you give this to him? How are we going to get their names?
Starting point is 00:40:01 Are you licking the lips? Are you licking the lips? Yeah. Steven Che, you're up there. do you know everybody up there that might be chay's team yeah it was my team in like the way back corner by where greer sits oh then i don't know is there a meeting that you could like go into yes with yeah there was one girl in one meeting with like four okay oh yeah but if. Yeah, actually. What if those are clients? What if those are outside clients?
Starting point is 00:40:26 That might not work. No, it could work amazingly for us. Bad for him. Let's put it up to a vote. I say no. Yeah. Yes. I vote yeah.
Starting point is 00:40:35 100%. I vote 100%, 40%. I think it would be funnier to do the- Do you? Do you now? I'm putting in my opinion. We can always go get one of the other flowers back. Yeah, you might want to do that.
Starting point is 00:40:47 There are like three. Yeah, yeah. Wait. Film yourself going and taking the flower back from the other two girls. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. You're going to need more flowers.
Starting point is 00:40:57 I have more flowers. You said there's more at his desk. Wait, why do you have more? You have more what on your what? Yeah. I have more flowers. Why do you have flowers? Oh, those are yours?
Starting point is 00:41:03 I don't know. Somebody gave me one. What is going on? What's happening today? You can tell me more flowers. Why do you have flowers? Oh, those are yours? I don't know. Somebody gave me one. What is going on? What's happening today? This was, I got it last Friday, just to be clear. From what? Yeah. From whom?
Starting point is 00:41:13 I think it was a gift from Erica to the token CEO pod, and then Madeline gave me one of them. Okay. Yeah. Well, maybe you returned it. Wait, did they do a prank? Maybe, hey, hold on. Maybe you returned the favor to Erica. You could do that. I could do it. Wait, did they do a prank? Hey, hold on. Maybe you return the favor to Erica. You could do that.
Starting point is 00:41:28 I could do that. Oh, wait. How? I think she's in our social media. Oh, she's on to us. Oh, she's right there walking by actively. She's probably got it down. Probably better that she's leaving.
Starting point is 00:41:40 Okay. Go get the flower back from Brandon. That's my sister. Just be like, I confused you for somebody else. Yeah. Make sure you say that. I would take that with you because you're going to go do the next mission. No, he can't go double flower.
Starting point is 00:41:54 Stop by. Okay. Wait, he's getting another flower. Okay. Yeah, yeah. Should I let her keep it? You're on a flower retrieval mission right now. Retrieve it.
Starting point is 00:42:02 Say you mistook her for someone else. Got it. Yeah, exfil. Wait, say like your... What's a name? Call her the wrong name and then be like, oh, fuck. I'm going to need to take this back. I thought you were blank.
Starting point is 00:42:17 Yeah. Okay. Sorry. I thought you were Wajia. Okay. Don't say that. Don't say that. Just go to the meeting. Say a white.
Starting point is 00:42:29 Just go to the meeting. He's going to take this flower. Standard white name. Oh, wait. Here comes Kelly Martin. Riley's down for whatever. This dude is a killer. Is that a Coen bro?
Starting point is 00:42:36 What's up? Oh, hey there. That guy looks like a director of some kind. He looks like every director. Movie director. I think it's a safety. Hey, Katie. Could I get the flower back?
Starting point is 00:42:46 You said Katie? That's her name. Oh, did he go away? I thought you were somewhere else. Oh, what a dickhead. Oh, no. Brandon, she might be moving back home. She might be...
Starting point is 00:42:58 That was mean. That one was mean. I hated that. Yeah, that was too mean. Give it back. You should give it back. Yeah, we should give it back No it's not a bitch
Starting point is 00:43:08 No it's not Uh oh Kelly's bitch Oh fuck Martin get the fuck out of here That was mean Give it back Yeah that was We hated that
Starting point is 00:43:16 You also named her You called her Katie Her name is That was too close Caitlin Name is Kate I know Alright no no
Starting point is 00:43:22 We should leave her alone Let's know that we despise that She needs the flower. It was too far. Okay, yeah. Give her, yeah. Brandon, so you're sending mixed messages. What do you want?
Starting point is 00:43:30 Do you want your sister to have a flower or not? What are you doing? I don't know. I'm just asking, man. Do you want her flowered or deep? Oh, no. Answer the question, Brad. I want a flower.
Starting point is 00:43:47 All right. Okay. Good. Then you can't be mad about that. Okay. All right. He's ready to... We're doing the meeting now?
Starting point is 00:43:54 I think the meeting. I think he's ready for the meeting. I mean, it seems like he could do anything. Okay. All right. I think it's meeting time. Is it meeting time? Well, let's see what
Starting point is 00:44:05 let's like what's Jay what's that meeting upstairs it doesn't matter it doesn't matter it doesn't it does not matter if it's outsiders
Starting point is 00:44:12 we can if it's if it comes down to people I would say are not Barstool employees they're talking about like what TikTok sounds I don't think it matters
Starting point is 00:44:20 promise you it's a prank document it you know who works here yeah but not over there it's fake want me to go pop in yeah look around I don't think it matters. It's a prank. Documented. You know who works here. Yeah, but not over there. It's fake. Want me to go pop in?
Starting point is 00:44:29 Yeah. Look around? Some muscle? But it's nothing important. If Erica, Dave, Big Cat are not there, it doesn't matter. I mean, it's true. You're not going to get in trouble. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:42 Listen to Sass. Want me to go pop in? Yeah. Pop in. Pop in Pop in Still vote no on the meeting On the meeting? Just won't You want to be on the record
Starting point is 00:44:49 Correct yes Yes I vote yes Try to gauge a feel What would be the most awkward Yeah And do that I can do that
Starting point is 00:44:56 Yeah I know you can But it has to be the most awkward It can't be like The meeting is going to be too awkward So I can't do it Yeah TJ
Starting point is 00:45:03 Now we're talking to him too much Yeah yeah We him too much. Yeah, yeah, we're too much guidance. He's got it on his own. Yeah, I think he's got it, yeah. He knows what he's doing. He's got a flower itch. I like how the flower's leaving.
Starting point is 00:45:18 It's the perspective of his hand. Yeah, it's the second level of James Bond. Golden Eye. He just jumped off a dam. Okay. All right. Quiet so we can hear him. Oh, it's eerie. It is.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Oh, boy. Oh, dear. Oh, it's... Oh, she's in like the far back. Oh, no. This is bad. I don't know. I don't know anymore.
Starting point is 00:45:44 I don't know anybody in that meeting. Let him do it. Oh, no, this is bad. I don't know. I don't know. Shh. I don't know anybody in that meeting. Shh. Let him do it. Oh, wait. What's another one? I didn't just listen to him. I have to talk.
Starting point is 00:45:51 No, go on now. Tell him now. No, no, no. Please go on. This is awful. This one doesn't look good. Oh, I'm afraid. Don't do this one.
Starting point is 00:45:58 Shut the fuck up. Let him do it. I'm alive. No, don't. Oh, he's doing it. He's doing it. He's doing it. Do you guys have something? Is it important i just want to
Starting point is 00:46:10 yeah just want to make your day a little bit better yeah what did i say oh my god that was really nice I couldn't walk. Oh, my God. I can't believe it. Oh. That was really nice. This dude is a savage. I'm going to put him on the logo.
Starting point is 00:46:32 He's the man. He's the man. He's the man. Oh, my God. All right, let's give him. What a fucking king. Oh, man. This dude is amazing. Oh, man. This dude is here.
Starting point is 00:46:45 That was amazing. Oh, my God. That was perfect. Unbelievable. Good shit. Unbelievable. They're talking so much shit on you up there. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:53 You nailed that. Oh, my God. So what was going through your head when you did the first swoop? I just wanted to see. I wanted to point the camera at the room to see if you could hear anything what you guys said. And I couldn't hear shit. So I just went in there. Do you think they noticed your camera?
Starting point is 00:47:09 No, because we're distracted. Yeah. And they were kind of distracted because I don't think they've ever had anyone fuck with them here. Oh, no. It was funny when you were like, is this important? And he was like, no. Oh, this? No.
Starting point is 00:47:24 That was great. You killed it. Yeah, that was No. That was great. You killed it, dude. Yeah, that was amazing. Ah, damn. Absolutely killed it. We have to honor him somehow. Those aren't... I stole those flowers from somebody who owns them.
Starting point is 00:47:35 I would say he definitely gets the last ten minutes on the show, no? You can have a seat. Come on. Take a seat. Pop a squat. This is your platform now. So now we've distributed flowers that are somebody else's. Yeah, where did you get those?
Starting point is 00:47:47 I think those were Gia's. It's her birthday. Oh, so you stole her flowers? Yeah. You stole her birthday flowers. She knows where they are. She can watch the episode back. Yeah, watch the episode.
Starting point is 00:47:57 A little Easter egg. Man, that was a rush, Riley. Thank you so much. God damn. It was good. There's one thing what? There's one thing that you own that I know you don't use. What?
Starting point is 00:48:10 You, Brandon. He wants a gift for doing all this. No, no, no, no, no. What are you talking about? The Arby's meat suit. You want my Arby's meat suit for doing that? No. Claim your prize.
Starting point is 00:48:20 What do you want? I was just wondering if you're using that. Oh, yeah, just a random. What is that? Are you using the Arby's meat suit? What the hell is the Arby's meat suit? You can have the Arby's meat suit. What do you want? I was just wondering if you're using it. Oh, no, just a random. What is that? Are you using the Arby's meat suit? What the hell is the Arby's meat suit? You can have the Arby's meat suit. What is it, Brandon?
Starting point is 00:48:30 I'm the biggest Arby's fan. Do we have the hat, TJ? We're not taking the hat from TJ. No, I don't need the hat. You just need the meat suit. I just want the meat suit. I want to wear it out one day. I'll have the meat suit for you tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:48:40 Thank you, Brandon. There we go. I'm not giving it to you, but you can have it. You deserve it. I can wear it. You can wear it. Thank you. That's all I need. Why aren't you giving it to him, Brandon? You can have the meat suit for you tomorrow. Thank you, Brandon. There we go. I'm not giving it to you, but you can have it. You deserve it. I can wear it. You can wear it. Thank you. That's all I need.
Starting point is 00:48:47 Why aren't you giving it to him, Brandon? You can have the meat suit. Thank you. Thank you. He deserves it. When would you ever wear the... That's a one... You can wear it once. People are like, is that that same meat suit that you wore?
Starting point is 00:48:56 Nah. I've never worn this. You will wear it. Oh, I will wear it out on a Saturday night. Okay, I'll bring it to you. Sick. What does it look like? It's called peacocking.
Starting point is 00:49:05 Is there a way we can see what that looks like? Should we just Google Arby's meat suit? No, but it's a shirt. I'm trying to think what it could possibly be. It's a jumpsuit of just their roast beef and their meats. Oh, really? So it's like Lady Gaga at the Grammys? Somewhat, yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:19 Okay. That's of everything, all the guys here, that's what you wanted? Yes. All right. I've wanted it for years. They sent it's what you wanted? Yes. All right. I wanted it for years. They sent it to me. Years?
Starting point is 00:49:28 Yeah. Years? Why are you asking what I asked you back? What's going on? You did. Yes. I love Arby's. There you go.
Starting point is 00:49:35 That's it. Okay. It's more of a jump. Who just said, what is this, when we pulled it up? Oh, I was talking about what are they carrying. Not that. What could that be? That's awesome. I now understand why he wants it. Yeah, it's tight. I think it's kind of gross they carrying. Not that. What could that be? That's awesome. I now understand why he wants it.
Starting point is 00:49:47 Yeah, it's tight. I think it's kind of gross. Yeah. It is. Okay, yeah. It's funny. You're a vegetarian. I like it.
Starting point is 00:49:55 All right, cool, man. Well, you deserve that. That was fucking sick. You won yourself a meat suit today. Thank you. That was the most metal thing I've seen all week. And it's going to get so mad at me for guilting him out of his meat suit. We've got to give more meat suits away.
Starting point is 00:50:06 Yeah, we should. Arby's has sent a couple to the office now, so if you just tweet, I like Arby's, they'll probably send you one. Arby's is a blast. Yeah, it is. Arby's is fun. Everybody knows the food is good, but you always forget how much fun you have at Arby's. Arby's is in my DMs.
Starting point is 00:50:22 I might get you one. What size are you? XL. Okay, let me see if I can get you your own. Get this man meated up. Thank you. Yeah, hell yeah. I get another meat suit.
Starting point is 00:50:32 That's very cool. I wanted to touch on the fake Tourette's girl. Oh, yeah, let's pull her up. We can save that. Let's pull her up. That could go bad if it's not fake. Are you out the rest of the week, Sas? I'm so confident that it's fake that I'm willing to risk being insensitive.
Starting point is 00:50:49 It is definitely fake. Let's pull her up. But if it isn't fake somehow. I'm going to send it. It's the last specific video that I sent. Yeah. She has 4 million TikTok followers. She's from West Virginia.
Starting point is 00:51:02 Has Tourette's. You guys be the judge we don't know if it's real or fake I believe she has the syndrome I don't believe you you're now see now you're I know I'm set yeah safety net I think she's amplifying it a little bit I think it's all fake but keep in mind I think it's she's using using all TikTok buzzwords as her... I mean, I don't know. I've seen a lot of Tourette's people on TikTok. Apparently someone got busted for faking Tourette's on TikTok recently.
Starting point is 00:51:33 It's funny that that's the name of the platform. How do you bust someone for faking Tourette's? You can't. That's the gray area. It was a 30-second video of them not having Tourette's. They busted on them for faking Tourette's. Get over here. Hey, sorry.
Starting point is 00:51:50 I'm going to bust on you. This is unacceptable. This reminds me of, what was the girl who was walking backwards? What? I have no idea. Was it a walking backwards girl? How was that faked? No, she got the flu vaccine, and then she's like,
Starting point is 00:52:04 the flu vaccine made me walk backwards. Everything's reversed. Remember that? Fuck, remember that old video? Which one is it? It was the unboxing one. Oh, just shaking his leg? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:15 Far down. Yeah! Top right. Talk, I need to find that. But never forget that sweater. Nope, that's not it. She's worn that sweater more than once. Nope.
Starting point is 00:52:24 Right there, left. Far left. Far left. Maybe sweat. Nope, that's not it. She's worn that sweater more than once. Nope. Right there, left. Far left. Far left. Maybe not. Little skies. Maybe, yeah. No, it had a caption. It's the unboxing. That's it. Yeah, maybe. That's it. The caption's on the bottom. Okay. It says... Yep, click. It says, I love my life. Oh, no. In the mail from... Real or
Starting point is 00:52:40 fake Tourette's. Self-care for everyone and I'm so excited to share it with you guys. Fuck you. What up? So Yeah. That part. The shake of the pillow was fake. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:52:58 Sorry, ma'am. As many of you guys know, I'm a very big advocate for mental health because I struggle with it. My. This is just all I can't. I can't. Myself is awkward.
Starting point is 00:53:13 I don't. So, yeah, I'm going to show you what I got. So to start off, I got like a bunch of stickers, like a bunch. Yeah. Buckle up. Look at that. So, yeah. This is the first shirt I got.
Starting point is 00:53:39 Guys. Guys. I don't know, Kyle. You could just be a monster yeah I believe her yeah I don't know I think there is an appeal regardless there's a charm I think she's a sweet girl
Starting point is 00:53:58 I think it is an ailment that we need to spread awareness to that's the thing whether that comes either way you're so happy for them i am happy for her um i think yeah i think there's a there's a there's a way to look at it and she engages her audience and the the finger and like the, some of it was, she's good content. That's all that matters.
Starting point is 00:54:31 See TikToks, uh, they're launching 10 minute videos now. It could be as long as 10 minutes. That's what we got. That's just, this episode is going to get 4 million views. That's too long.
Starting point is 00:54:43 10 minutes is way too long. Way too long. Way too, way too, way too long. Um, is way too long. Way too long. Way too, way too, way too long. Is there anyone else you want to call out? Fuck, I'm trying to find that video. Do you guys remember the video of the dude in the beginning of the pandemic? Who got the COVID vaccine? His leg was shaking? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:54:59 But he's like rolling around. I know there was like a woman who was funny. I remember that, but I don't know how you'd ever find it yeah uh i posted on my story i checked those archives trying but i'm not seeing it that's a lot of stories it's a shame it's a damn shame kyle i'm with you i think some of that was exaggerated. Yeah, I mean, either way, do you blame her? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:55:30 I think she did a great job concealing it. I think that she probably has more Tourette's. You think she has more? Yeah, I mean, I think they actively try to cover it up all day, every day. That's the cross they bear. Any more Tourette's than that, that's like a fucking breakdancing video, dude. It's just like, I get like saying like,
Starting point is 00:55:49 being like, fuck, fuck. But, that's. No, I thought, I thought the, just pumping the pillow, or the pillow, the pillow shake was what seemed fake to me.
Starting point is 00:56:02 Like she was just max rep. This is why people need to spread awareness, because I don't know the... She's playing piano on 7th Avenue right now. Let's go get her. We love what you're doing. You rock. So glad you're in here.
Starting point is 00:56:16 She doesn't shake Sass's hand. I did notice that. I re-watched that back, because I'm a huge... He, like, dat me up twice. I'm a huge Axl stan, and the fact that he ghosted, he absolutely breezed you. He knew exactly who you were. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:30 He'd be media prep too. He'd be like, do you have Tourette's? She's like, I've been diagnosed with something. I have ADHD, actually. With some Tourette's. Oh, man. Nice. I'm glad Rudy was in here today.
Starting point is 00:56:46 And Frankie. We actually... Oh, fuck. Yeah, we have to. We do have to. Riley, you're in. Is this for me? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:54 No, it's everybody. For all of us. Okay. Good job keeping tradition alive, TJ. Thank you, TJ. TJ, you son of a bitch dickhead. No. No. No.head. No.
Starting point is 00:57:05 No. No. No. Oh, God. Does that mean we all get wet? I'm not. What does it mean? I don't think it should count. We're all getting wet.
Starting point is 00:57:18 Just one person, right? No, it's never everyone. We're all getting wet. Call Big Cat. Call Big Cat. It's never everyone. We're all getting wet everyone. Call Big Cat. Call Big Cat. It's never everyone. We're all getting wet. Even if you call Big Cat, this is...
Starting point is 00:57:27 No, it was not agreed upon that we were all getting wet. I think it's everyone but one. Everyone but one? We spin until the driest? Yeah, we got to go to the driest. God damn it! It shouldn't count if Big Cat and Ronar aren't here. This is Big Cat's entire idea.
Starting point is 00:57:42 That is true. No. Guys, we're not going out like this. You can't go out like this. I can't get wet. The wheel is just. Not. Imagine the backlash.
Starting point is 00:57:50 Imagine. I have to go bring my. You have to. Fuck. We have to. You have to. I'm so glad you did this. What was agreed upon?
Starting point is 00:57:57 I got to go. I can't go. Fuck. You can't. You can't get out of this. No, no, no. You're not getting out of this with a wrestling interview. Listen to what I'm saying.
Starting point is 00:58:03 Listen to what I'm saying. No, you have no. Listen to what I'm saying. No, you have no. Listen to what I'm saying. I'm going to write a note and reserve the bathroom so we don't go in after a shit. Oh, right. Oh. Yes. Okay.
Starting point is 00:58:13 He ain't coming back. Oh, he ain't coming back. All right, let's. This fuck. Fuck, dude. He would never think about the hole like that. No, Brandon has never thought about the hole. Never once, man.
Starting point is 00:58:28 Damn, dude. That's fucking awful. And Riley, you're a part of it now. That's fine with me. I'm surprised you guys didn't just tell me I was the one getting it. We could have. I assume the wet wheel at first. Again, it's not a bit thing. It's not a comedy thing.
Starting point is 00:58:43 It's a wet tradition. Do we look alike? Yeah, you guys not a bit thing. It's not a comedy thing. No. It's just a good. It's a way. God, there's a tradition. We look alike. Yeah, you guys do. Yeah, exactly. Almost identical. I'm definitely fatter than Nick, though. I wouldn't say definitely.
Starting point is 00:58:57 Yeah. Yeah. You guys look very alike. Yeah. Shit. Yeah. You guys do. You have to say why shit? Because we're good looking. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Too many. Too many hunks. Yeah. Shit. Yeah, you guys do. Wait, why shit? Because we're both good looking.
Starting point is 00:59:05 Yeah, okay, yeah, too many hunks. Yeah. Shit. I hate when that happens. Shit. Yeah. When girls flirt with you and you flirt back, it's awful. Dude, you should guys rock meat suits together, meat brothers.
Starting point is 00:59:17 Yeah. Yeah, I guess we could be meat brothers. We could enjoy it. Yeah, Rudy, I guess you're fucking right. Yeah, be meat bros. I don't want to get wet at all. I don't want to get wet at all. Call Big Cat and see if there's like a... Nick Tuesday's Zod doesn't have to get wet.
Starting point is 00:59:29 That's always been a rule. That has been a rule on Nick Tuesday's. I got like shit to do after. Yeah, me too. We got to go bring our fucking checks. Oh, we could be wet. Yeah, or just like, just do t-shirt and then... Have no clothes either.
Starting point is 00:59:43 Just do t-shirt, wet. Pants lying around. Also, you could be the do t-shirt, wet, pants lying around. Also, you could be the driest. Yeah, you could win driest. Just see it all. And then we have a bunch of new wet wheel merch. Shut the fuck up, TJ. This is all your fault, you colossal dick. I respect the wheel.
Starting point is 00:59:59 So easy to not get wet, too. You were so close to just forgetting. Wait, TJ, if we just cut it now and then just strip it from the episode it'll last like eight minutes. What about the live viewers?
Starting point is 01:00:14 Fuck them. They're bots. They're mostly bots. Mind you that was at a little angle it is circular. So I've never been a part of this.
Starting point is 01:00:24 What's about to happen? All of us are going to get wet except for one person. You have to go under the shower fully clothed. Yo. Fuck. Big cap. What's up? So we did the wet wheel, daily tradition, and it landed on wet.
Starting point is 01:00:39 No. We're just wondering, you and Ro need to be there. Yes, I need to be there. Yes, I need to be there, yes. For us to actually follow through, right? Yes. Okay. Agreed.
Starting point is 01:00:49 Thank you. Yeah, yeah, just making sure. I don't want to miss it. It's got to be six out of seven. You've got to get six out of seven. That's the rule. Oh, fuck. Like one person probably gets what?
Starting point is 01:00:59 Oh, six regular members out of seven? Six regular members out of seven. All right. Stop. People are going to be furious. I don't think they're going to care. It was a good show. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:01:08 No. Thank you, Big Cap. I don't know, man. We'll do it Friday. We'll do it Friday. Yeah. Nick, the deflower joke was fucking beautiful. Thanks, man.
Starting point is 01:01:17 The episode is worth it. All right. I'm out. Yeah, I think he just pretty much said you have Riley. If you get wet, then we're good. So why don't you go... Hasn't he done enough? Don't make Riley get wet.
Starting point is 01:01:30 I can get wet. It's not a... He wants to get wet. I can get wet. I think you have to. I can get wet. Man to man, no matter what they say. Can he bring Zoopy in for a one-on-one?
Starting point is 01:01:40 He can bring Zoopy in. I'm against this. I think we should get wet. He can't just say we can't get wet. Yeah, but that wasn't very 10x of him. 10x was last season, bro.
Starting point is 01:01:51 We're fine. EJ, what do you think? I think... You know the public opinion. People are going to be furious if we don't do it today. Are people already displaying ire?
Starting point is 01:02:03 Yeah, boo, L, dislike, KBL, unsubbing, product, fuck barstool, boo, right, fuck Yeah, boo, L, dislike, KBL, unsubbing, product, fuck Barstool, boo, Riley, fuck Riley, boo, L, L, Then we should just not do it. These are all Riley-centric. This is hilarious. I fucking hate Riley. Boycott the app. I said I'll get wet. Why don't we just do the
Starting point is 01:02:18 wet wheel and one person has to get soaking wet right now? As opposed to like one. We'll do it like we did in LA. Well, one, only one person does. Yes. An eliminator,
Starting point is 01:02:27 we'll do a reverse wet. I think that's way more fair and funny, because once one person does it, the novelty wore off, and who cares if five people do it straight? All right, so we'll do a reverse wet. Odds are,
Starting point is 01:02:39 it's not going to be me. It's what you always think. That just put some bad energy into the universe, you saying that right there. Yeah, but you doing that has turned the tide. Karma looks upon me with fear. I'm going to go get wet. Okay.
Starting point is 01:02:52 Fine by me. Wait a minute. No, let's do the... Put up a straw pole. The wheel's way more fun. What are they saying? Okay. Like a more civilized collection of people.
Starting point is 01:03:03 If the chat can count to 13 without anything interrupted, we'll do a classic wet wheel. I think Brandon... Where are you boys headed? I guess they just want to get wet. What is going on? What are they doing? What is going on? I think all three of them are going to...
Starting point is 01:03:19 Well, we have to then. Why did Brandon jump at that? I think he's stinky. I think he pooped his pants. Something is up. I think he's pooped. He put the sign up. He's chomping at the bit.
Starting point is 01:03:31 What? They're not getting wet. Something else is going on in there. He's only ever cared about himself. When those three get together, it's always something crazy. Looks like Owen's getting wet. These guys are actually... Classic bait and switch.
Starting point is 01:03:47 You just went in there pretending like you were going to do it and then just left? Oh shit, Brandon's looking for you? Let's just, okay, if those if there are two people that... If Brandon's dead set on getting wet... What is Brandon doing? I don't know why he wants to get wet.
Starting point is 01:03:59 We have to do a wheel. We have to do a reverse wheel. So we'll do an eliminator. One person gets wet. I'm going to go get him. Why is he so dead set on getting wet? We have to do a wheel. We have to do a reverse wheel. So we'll do an eliminator. One person gets wet. I'm going to go get him. That's what we're doing. All right, well, you got to get him quick. Why is he so dead set on getting wet? Nick's fast. Low key. Yeah, I hate that I could give him that.
Starting point is 01:04:17 Oh, they're already wet. Why? You think you're faster? Nick is athletic for what he is. You think you're faster? Yes, I am faster for what he is. He's athletic for what he is. You think you're faster? Yes, I am faster for what he is. He's athletic for what he is. Yeah, for what being a human being.
Starting point is 01:04:28 He's athletic for what he comes across as. Do you agree? Yeah. I'm just, like, confused, I guess, at what just happened there. It wanted to get wet so bad. So bad. I was pretty excited Well, we'll see I think it's gonna be Rudy. Oh boy
Starting point is 01:04:53 If it's me I'm drowning myself in the bathroom Yes, you have to pull me out of a puddle You boys in I'm having a good so I think you are You guys are going to have to pull me out of a puddle. But we need Booth. We said out loud I don't want to get wet. You boys in? I'm having a good hair day. So I think one person, because not everyone's here, I think if one person gets wet today and then Friday, which is a draft day already, we agree to do a full wet experience.
Starting point is 01:05:17 Could roll it over. I think that makes sense. No, no, no. Let's, the wheel, we're never going to hear the end of this. Right. Let's do how we did in L.A. One person's getting wet today. Yeah, that's what we're never going to hear the end of this. Right. Let's do how we did in LA. One person's getting wet. Yeah, that's what we're doing.
Starting point is 01:05:29 One person. Everybody in this fucking room on the wheel. And Grandin. Yep, Grandin. A lot of screen time today. There's never been a girl on the wheel. That is true. For a good reason.
Starting point is 01:05:40 Can we put one sliver on it where Riley goes back into the meeting with a super soaker? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That would rule. Just go only for their laptops. Their dry is a bone. Yeah. Look at that.
Starting point is 01:05:54 I feel safe. That's a ton of names on there. Bro, you're scared. Brother heard. I'm fine with this. Petrified. It sucks to be wet. I could take a pill and never be wet again.
Starting point is 01:06:04 I'd do it Everybody get wet Is it really that bad It's not It's not bad in the moment It's bad after Let's go feed a bunch of pussies And let's just get wet
Starting point is 01:06:11 Okay Alright We'll see one person does Why do you Why do you want to get wet I know It's like You should
Starting point is 01:06:17 Don't talk about being a pussy This is the gimmick that we do You can't even withhold From Chick-fil-A For 20 minutes Let's do it Hold on Hold on
Starting point is 01:06:23 Jesus Christ Nick's gone soft Please Always been Withhold from Chick-fil-A for 20 minutes. Let's do it. Hold on, hold on. Jesus Christ. Nick's gone soft? Please. Always been. What do you mean gone? Who's Nick Wolak and why is he just spamming Hope It's Sass? Asshole.
Starting point is 01:06:38 You know exactly who Nick Wolak is. Let's do it. Wait a minute. It's Frank. Frank is Nick Wolak. DJ, can you put up a straw poll? We're catering too much to the listeners. Call the poll. Let's Frank. DJ, can you put up a straw poll? We're catering too much to this. Let's not cater to that.
Starting point is 01:06:49 Every poll that you do is going to be heavily in favor of everybody getting wet. So just do it how you all want to do it. If we do any poll, it's all going to make us... They want us to suffer. Someone said do it for Ukraine. What'd they say? Do it for Ukraine? Tell me why that's wrong. What'd they say do it for Ukraine tell me why that's wrong what'd he say
Starting point is 01:07:09 what'd he say I'll leave it up to you guys I'm a guest who's this guy why's he talking to Dukes let's have him do it yeah PLL guy
Starting point is 01:07:21 Paul Rabel Paul Rabel hold on where's Paul Rabel going to Ericael. Hold on. Where's Paul Rabel? Going to Erica's office. Erica left. I'm calling Big Cat. What the fuck is he doing in there?
Starting point is 01:07:37 Hey, man. Still on the Yak. Live recording. Chat is about to stage a coup. Why are they upset? Why don't we just do it on friday because we've been preaching that the wheel is just so what we're thinking is a reverse wet wheel where only one of us has to get wet to appease okay i like that and they gotta get something wet i think big hat should be on the wheel he's not here zoom in no no no because that would make six out of the seven participating.
Starting point is 01:08:06 We'd have to do a traditional wet wheel. Tell the chat to go fuck itself. Yeah, we've been. We did say that. But they know they have all the power. You guys are such losers. Shut up. Never talk about it.
Starting point is 01:08:19 Oh, no. Somebody paid $10 just for me. $10? Okay. No, put a script. You need to do it in one review. You just got to get sopping wet. Sopping.
Starting point is 01:08:29 Yeah, okay. That'll appease, I think. Okay, and then we'll do it again on Friday. We'll do a real one on Friday. Yeah, okay. Okay, bye. Bye. This is my purgatory.
Starting point is 01:08:38 Fuck. All right. I wasn't supposed to be here today. Neither was I, apparently. Yeah, I guess so. All right. I guess we'll do a reverse wet. Spin.
Starting point is 01:08:53 So this is an eliminator wheel. You want your name. You want your name. Okay. Let me get that music. I'm feeling dread. So, Chad, calm down. Full wheel Friday.
Starting point is 01:09:04 Full wheel Friday. And actually calm down. Full wheel Friday. Full wheel Friday. And actually calm down. Full wheel Friday. Draft Friday. Big day. Pull the chat back up. KB, pick a name at random. Fight them.
Starting point is 01:09:12 Can't even see it. Houston Grisberg or Greenberg. Nick Wolak. Haley Hartman. Fight her. What the fuck? Girls are paying to keep you dry. That's bad.
Starting point is 01:09:25 That's the biggest slap in the face I could ever see. Yeah, let's keep him dry. She wants all the credit. $20? Let's see how much it's going. Where does this money go? The void. The company.
Starting point is 01:09:40 Really? Okay, yeah, that's good then. She's going to Erica's office. We made $30. Don't know thumbs down. Don't alienate yourself. All right, let's just do the reverse wheel. That's what we're going to do.
Starting point is 01:09:52 Let's do it. Do the wheel. Thicken around. $2. You don't fuck around with $2? Don't worry about the chat. Worry about us. We're already putting like...
Starting point is 01:10:00 I got to know who this guy is. I'm going to get some Benzos and brothers on Friday. Yeah. We will be soaking wet now for it too. Let's just spin the wheel. I want to know who this guy is. He looks cool. He does look so cool. He reminds me of my
Starting point is 01:10:13 penalty turn fifth grade. He's important too. We should know who that is. I think he's got some fame to him. Come in. Come in. He's so jolly. I know, I like him.
Starting point is 01:10:27 He's a nice guy. I like him already. What's up, man? Just a few seconds of your time. Dude's sitting in chairs here. What's going on? Let's go. Fuck yeah.
Starting point is 01:10:37 You like the cut of your jib. Say that again. Mike, Mike, Mike, Mike. Who are you? I'm Jason. Oh, fuck yeah. We knew you were a star. We knew you were a star from the second you walked by.
Starting point is 01:10:53 The glow. It's the best day of my life. What's going on, man? Well, I'm out here promoting the Lakers show, Winning Time. Okay. I play the logo. Wait, is this your guest? They threatened me.
Starting point is 01:11:14 We like to cut off his jib. Yeah, you should. It's Jason Clarke, man. He's an acclaimed Australian actor. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. I knew it was something like that.
Starting point is 01:11:22 What have I walked into here? We're doing the wet wheel. Doing the wet wheel. I love how casual. I'm going to dunk you in water. You should get out of here. I love how casual the math here is. Wet wheel.
Starting point is 01:11:29 Yeah, all of our names are on a wheel. The last name up there has to go get wet. Two options. I'll get a shower over there. No. You can stay and risk getting wet, or you can leave and you'll be dry for the rest of your day. I'm going to head back to Los Angeles, dude. That's wool, too.
Starting point is 01:11:46 Is that wool? Shit. That's cashmere. That's cashmere? Yeah. Isn't that a type of wool? What's a goat? It's a goat.
Starting point is 01:11:54 Is it? My father was a sheep shearer. Very particularly different. Your friend's a sheep shearer? My father was a sheep shearer. My father was a sheep shearer? Yeah, my father was a sheep shearer, yeah. I know my wool.
Starting point is 01:12:02 That's awesome. Are you a Western boy or East Coast? L.A. now. I used my wool. That's awesome. Yeah. Western boy or east coast? LA now. I used to live in New York. Australia. Yeah, Australian though originally, yeah. Which part? From originally up at Queensland and now northern New South Wales.
Starting point is 01:12:15 Nice. Up on the coast there. Where are you originally from? Winton. Winton. Go and Google that, man. Middle of nowhere. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:22 Literally the middle of nowhere. Eight hours west of Townsville. Pull up Winton? Out of Townsville? I've got to get going. Listen, love to talk to the wet wheel. Good luck, fellas. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:12:34 Appreciate it. Sorry, Ken Jack. We just knew that guy was... That guy is everything I want to be in life. His dad was a sheep shearer. I know. You would be jealous of him. Is cashmere a type of wool?
Starting point is 01:12:46 Such a question. I had no idea. I was just pretending. That guy gave me confidence. So you know why he was here? He's playing Jerry West in the new HBO show. Oh, I saw the still of that.
Starting point is 01:12:54 He looked great. That's it. That's Jerry West. The literal NBA logo. The logo. Oh, that's why he said that. Zeke from the Lakers. Oh, he's the Lakers logo,
Starting point is 01:13:03 he said? He's the logo. I was like, what are you talking about? The literal NBA logo. Playing Jerry West. He's from Lakers. Oh, he's the Lakers logo, he said? He's the logo. I was like, what are you talking about? The literal NBA logo. Playing Jerry West. He's from West Virginia. He is from West Virginia, that's true.
Starting point is 01:13:11 And he talked about West Virginia in our interview. Did he go there? Also, did you see the fake Tourette's girls from West Virginia? He's from Ranson, yeah. Ask him about the waltzing Matilda Center. Cheers, lads. Nailed it. That was like every accent. Look at your dudes hanging out.
Starting point is 01:13:24 Look at your wet wheel. All right. All right, all right.. Look with your wet wheel. All right. All right, all right. Good luck with the wet wheel. All right. Let's didgeridoo it. Ah, damn. Had to get to work going back to Los Angeles.
Starting point is 01:13:33 Yeah. That's not even close to Australian. What was that? I don't even know what the fuck I'm saying. That was like Irish. That's the guy saying, where were you? Australian's the easiest one to go. I let him have my seat.
Starting point is 01:13:44 I went and took a piss Something's amiss with you today Brandon Wait a minute why do you have one leg up Are you biking? Are you riding a bike? Brandon's doing Uber Eats What's up my side? Alright fuck
Starting point is 01:14:00 Alright spin it Wet wheel God damn. Let's fucking go. No. Oh, come on. I told you karma was going to get your ass. Classic underdog.
Starting point is 01:14:17 Cutie. Wheels just. Wheels just. It was just Wheel was just Wheel was just It knew if I stood up for it It would take care of me Let's go Let's go.
Starting point is 01:14:56 Tuesday. Yes. Yes. We're still six names. We're still 6-9. We're still fine. Oh, no. Wow. Dry Booth. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 01:15:29 Not TJ. Where he belongs. Dry. Oh, Kyle. Dry Booth. Wow. Praying for my boys. Flip out.
Starting point is 01:15:48 I'm going to flip out. It's going to look bad. There you go, Kyle. Thank God, dude. I was going to have a fit. Wow, first time on the act. No, it's not. First wet wheel at least. Best of seven?
Starting point is 01:16:04 Oh, yeah. Best of seven. Stand up. Three. You want seven. Five. Just do one. One.
Starting point is 01:16:13 Let's do one. One time? Sure. That's a risky move. You want one? Yeah, just do one. Sure, I'll do one. Yeah, just do one.
Starting point is 01:16:21 All right, wait. If you say your name, you win. Then the other guy gets wet, right? Yeah. If it lands on your name, you get wet? No. your name, you win. And the other guy gets wet, right? Yeah. If it lands on your name, you get wet? No. If it lands on your name, the other guy gets wet. That's what he just said.
Starting point is 01:16:31 All right. Let's do it. Rock Riley. Oh, he didn't wish it back. Riley, what? Look, I also didn't apologize when you smashed the mic in my face. I did apologize. I think I did at least.
Starting point is 01:16:44 That was an accident. I'm sorry. All right, Riley, I want to see you wet. And I know you do, too. So let in my face. I did apologize. I think I did at least. That was an accident. I'm sorry. All right, Riley, I want to see you wet. I know you do too, so let's get this. I honestly do. Riley. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
Starting point is 01:17:01 Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, and the baby boy. The baby boy! The baby boy! You'll get soaking wet! Alright, boys. Trooper.
Starting point is 01:17:13 Oh, this is awesome. Man, the wheel kind of has like a consciousness. Uh-huh. That's crazy. Sentient. Yeah. They never stop like that. I thought I was... Oh, it never has that.
Starting point is 01:17:21 That must be a new update. Woo! Let's go, Riley. What a fucking trooper, man. Alright, TJ. Oh, you That must be a new update. Let's go, Riley. What a fucking trooper, man. All right, TJ. Oh, you want to end it? Yeah. That's the yak.
Starting point is 01:17:28 Wait. We got to have him walk out. Yeah, I want people to see how wet he gets. Wait, wait. We should all leave the room? No, wait. He should have to go retrieve his flower soaking wet. Yes, he should.
Starting point is 01:17:39 That's a lot. Yeah. But I do want to leave the room and act like the yak is over. Yeah. And have. No, no, no. Yeah, he should just have to go get a flower. But I do want to leave the room and act like the yak is over. Yeah. And, ah. No, no, no. Yeah, he should just have to go get a flower. I see that coming.
Starting point is 01:17:49 I think he should just have to retreat. Upstairs flower? From the girl upstairs. Oh, my goodness. That would be unreal. Oh, he's already back? Oh, he's damp. Wait.
Starting point is 01:17:57 Oh, wow. Well, he didn't get soaked. He doesn't know. That's fine. And he's wet. He's wet enough. He's wet enough. It's actually perfect.
Starting point is 01:18:04 It's perfect wet. Okay. All right. Good wet. Good wet. Spin, spin. No, that's fine. He's wet. He's wet enough. It's actually perfect. It's perfect wet. Okay. All right. Good wet. Good wet. Spin, spin. No, that's wet. Oh, yeah, you're wet.
Starting point is 01:18:10 That's certainly wet. Now we need one more thing from you. We need you to go. Push your hair back forwards. Okay, yeah, that's good. Yeah, that's good. We need you to go get your flower back from that girl upstairs soaking wet. Wait a minute.
Starting point is 01:18:22 We need to call in. This motherfucker. He's the most down dude. Wait a minute. We need to call in. This motherfucker. He's the most down dude. He is a down ass dude. He is. Uh-huh. Same link, TJ? He's like pressing in jackass.
Starting point is 01:18:34 I'm not going to get my new link on him. Riley, can you send us $100 on Venmo? I'm disapproving the security artist today. He's disgusted. You were tilted, KB. Tilted? Yeah, you're pissed. How disapproving the security guard is today. He's disgusted. You were tilted, KB. Tilted? Yeah, you're pissed.
Starting point is 01:18:50 That's what it means. Oh, is that cool slang? Yeah, it's super cool slang. You should use that. I'm going to use that. Tilted. No, you're wet enough, man. No, it's subtle enough.
Starting point is 01:19:05 It's subtle enough. I think maybe go re-wet your hair. No, I think that's. It's subtle enough. I think maybe go re-wet your hair. No, I think that's a perfect level of wetness. I might just do it. I mean, I'm already wet. Yeah, do it. This dude, do not give a fuck. Oh my God.
Starting point is 01:19:19 Riley, man. All right. I'm so glad. Wait in TJ. I'm so glad I landed on you Riley Look at the TJ heads lurking around out there too I'll go re-wet myself The Riley heads You're good
Starting point is 01:19:34 I almost didn't pick Riley I was going to try to get Paul Rabel He would have never gotten wet I'm so glad I landed on Riley I'm sure she's not in the meeting anymore. No, he's got to go. I bet they are. Oh, this is really mean.
Starting point is 01:19:52 He's very about it. And he's wet. It's mean to her, though. Coming back up here wet. Hey, I forgot I need that back. Yeah, we didn't tell him what his excuse was. Yeah, that flower was a rental. That flower was a rental.
Starting point is 01:20:08 Oh, is the meeting over? Oh, no. Oh, no. He's got to find her. He's got to find her. Yeah, where is she? She's sad in the end. Where is she?
Starting point is 01:20:18 Where is she? Hey. Excuse me. Can I have a flower bag? Oh, God. oh what a monster they're ripping him apart he's a killer oh my god there's no emotion hey i'm gonna need that back he tapped her on the shoulder, though. She saw him. Oh, my goodness. Look how he holds it. It does look like a video game.
Starting point is 01:20:50 He quipped it. Pull out your inventory and grab your flower. Oh, my goodness. There he is, the king. He got to lift the shower on. Oh, he lifted the shower on. He's going to jump back in there I hope somebody's shitting
Starting point is 01:21:07 Or somebody's just in their shower He did leave it on That's tough to like forget Nah I did it It's tough to forget Alright Shout out to Riley Yeah shout out to Riley
Starting point is 01:21:19 Follow him on everything Follow Riley Collins I don't even know Very funny on TikTok He's the man Riley what are your handles? Riley what's your TikTok? My Twitter is RileyCollins
Starting point is 01:21:31 Underscore underscore That's tricky Yeah Yeah I know What about TikTok? I think you were banned RileyCollins2 on TikTok Two
Starting point is 01:21:40 The number two or spelled out? Number two Killed it That was amazing Yeah thank you That's the Yak, boys. Great job. You can keep it.
Starting point is 01:21:48 Okay, thank you. It's the act It's the act It's the act It's the act

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