The Yak - The Wheel Has Chosen A New Enemy | The Yak 6-15-23

Episode Date: June 15, 2023

Cheah = ZaddyYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Of all the things in life, one of the best has to be getting high whenever you want, wherever you want, without the paranoia of consuming some sketchy black market bunk. What's the best way to do that? With 3Chi, of course. 3Chi has the highest quality cannabis products from their delicious Delta 9 edibles and their industry-leading Delta 8 products to their new line of Delta 9-O vapes and everything in between.
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Starting point is 00:01:59 Hey, it looks good. Oh, the bangs. The bangs. Yeah. What the hell else? Yeah. No, you didn't know what we were talking about. What? I was like, what could it be?
Starting point is 00:02:08 Now, I'll say this. It's highly stylized right now because this is fresh from the salon. Like, I didn't wash it or anything. And you're like, that's okay. Because I was crying about it online. Now, picture. You were crying about it? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:21 Last night. Picture me fresh out of the salon. It was like. Yeah. Yeah. You were crying about it? Oh, yeah, last night. Picture me fresh out of the salon. It was like... Yeah. That's a different vibe. That's what you mean. That looks like when a kid draws hair. It's very much a different...
Starting point is 00:02:37 Like, this is how I left the salon, and I was like, I'm going to go in. No, the hair up looks good. Yeah, see, it just takes a little... Yeah, there we go. You should feel good. Yeah, okay. Thank just takes a little. Yeah, there we go. You should feel good. Yeah, okay. Thank you. Everything's fine.
Starting point is 00:02:48 How did it go? What did you tell them? How did they react? The hair salon? What picture did you show? Did you show them Rosebud? On my Twitter, I showed them a picture of, like, four of Zooey Deschanel. It's on my Twitter, the four pictures that I genuinely showed her.
Starting point is 00:03:04 And in the end, it turns out maybe it's my face is different than their faces. That's why I don't look the same as them. That looks good. Thank you. Thanks, guys. You're all looking great, too. Look at you. I wear cutoffs all the time.
Starting point is 00:03:18 Cutoff sleeve. This is the Barstool 4th of July merch. We rarely get to see all the tats. We rarely get a good look at every single one of the tats. No one likes us. We don't care. I think they took us from Philly. Hey, cat.
Starting point is 00:03:32 Cheers, brother. Oh, cheers. Cheers, brother. Cheers. Brandon, split that with me. Come on. Come get one. So Brandon is in a bagel debate.
Starting point is 00:03:40 That's what I was late for. And I told him Montreal bagels are better than any bagel in the entire world. Montreal? Montreal bagels have the best bagels in the entire world. Is that like a place? Like a store? It's a city. It's a city. How the hell did you get
Starting point is 00:03:58 a bagel store as well? How'd you get one? Hey, Kate. Nice haircut. We just talked bangs. Oh, yeah. We just talked bangs. I said it sincerely. He did. Thank you. Nice haircut?
Starting point is 00:04:08 Yeah, we liked it. I like it, too. It's good with headphones on. It's like a little headband. Yeah. Cute. What are you thinking? What did you just do, Kate?
Starting point is 00:04:18 I watered down all my juice. Yeah. Keeping it light. This is much better than any New York bagel because it's thin. Yes. I don't like thick bagels. Also, just to throw this out there, the Montreal bagel that I brought in has been frozen, so it's obviously not fresh. If you get a fresh one, it will kill any bagel ever.
Starting point is 00:04:37 This is just butter. You didn't have to put scallion cream cheese. Nope. This is better. It's a good bagel. I still like donuts and everything better, but this is a is better. It's good bagel. I still like donuts and everything better, but this is a lot better. Those are two different foods.
Starting point is 00:04:48 A much bigger whole. Donuts and bagels. Donuts? So have you guys ever had Montreal bagels? Never. Didn't know. They are the most delicious bagels in the world. It's that place, St. Viator.
Starting point is 00:04:58 I'm not a huge bagel guy. Really? Just bread. I love them. Yeah, you're pretty much just eating bread and butter for breakfast. What do you think? A plain bagel.
Starting point is 00:05:04 Is that better? Much better. Do you just have those eating bread and butter for breakfast. What do you think? A plain bagel. Is that better? Much better. Do you just have those in your freezer at home? I just order them from the St. Vietor place. I get a big box, and then I freeze them. Well, hell yeah. So these came from the Katz residence. They came from my refrigerator.
Starting point is 00:05:21 Oh, I was wondering how you got this from Montreal. I bought them. Yeah, I buy a big box and then I freeze them all. Best bagels in the world. Far better than the New York bagels. Best bagels in the world. Whenever someone says, oh, New York bagels are the best, bro, you've never had I like New York bagels a lot.
Starting point is 00:05:35 What do you think, Ron? It's very good. I wouldn't say it's far better, because it's still the same category. But I think it could be, you could say it's better. What I don't like about the bagels we get here, they're too thick. And they're too daunting. You can have them scooped out and it's daunting. If you've got to scoop it out, why even eat it?
Starting point is 00:05:53 More filling, less bagel. The egg sandwich is the bagel. To make a bagel better, I have to get rid of the bagel. Scoop it out and then your complaint's gone. That is true. What he said, though, TJ, to be like this food is really good, but just get less of it. It's just bread. Scoop it out.
Starting point is 00:06:09 I like, if I get a breakfast sandwich, I'd rather own a roll. But I like a bagel with cream cheese. I just wanted to get that off. That was nice. I'll get you to have a Montreal bagel. Did you like it, Ron? It's delicious. It's a little bit sweeter. Yeah, it's got a a Montreal bagel. Did you like it, Rowan? What's this? It's delicious. It's a little bit sweeter.
Starting point is 00:06:26 Yeah, it's got a little sweetness to it. Is it with the sickle? It's like something about they're smaller and there's a little bit of sweet to it. Yes. What book? It's nice. It's just nice. So what book?
Starting point is 00:06:39 I'm sorry, Nick. No, no. Brandon was talking. This doesn't have to be on the show. What's your tattoos? It's kind of a good tidbit, though, in case someone ever wants to put it in doesn't have to be on the show. What's your tattoos? Kind of a good tidbit, though, in case someone ever wants to put it in jeopardy. Let's talk wrestling. Why?
Starting point is 00:06:50 The one-year return that happened yesterday. The one-year hiatus he returned. Eddie Kingston. What happened? What? Eddie Kingston came back yesterday. How about Little Mike? Mike returned after a year to Tennessee Backyard Wrestling.
Starting point is 00:07:03 What? Oh, you're still watching the big shit? Yeah, I'm watching the big shit. Oh, no, no, no. Little Mike came back? Little Mike came back to fight Atomic Titan. Where do they do Tennessee Backyard Wrestling? Backyard in Tennessee.
Starting point is 00:07:14 All right. That was understandable. You didn't see it? I didn't see it. I didn't know that Little Mike had been gone for a year. I think I saw that. You saw Little Mike's return? Yeah, it was.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Can we see it? Is he locked up? I got to find him. When was he gone for a year? He was hurt, and then, saw a little mic's return? Yeah, it was. Was he locked up? Why was he gone for a year? He was hurt, and then, you know, I just think he fell out of, yeah. I was watching this event the other day.
Starting point is 00:07:31 PBW is literally my initials. Yeah, so, what's your first name? Thomas. Listen to that. There's his music. Chills.
Starting point is 00:07:39 What a pop. Where are the fans? There's a Chevy truck in there. Who wins the pop? It's Atomic truck in there. Who wins the pot? It's Atomic Titan. Pop happened. Oh, Pop already happened over it.
Starting point is 00:07:50 There is Little Mike. There's Little Mike. Music after a year. Is he going to come from behind him? No. There he is. That's not. Yeah, Little Mike.
Starting point is 00:08:02 Yep, there it is. I was so amped up. This is the most guys being dudes thing you can do. Yeah. Just going into a backyard and wrestling with your boys. What flag is that? That's a cup. Makes sense.
Starting point is 00:08:22 Little Mike versus Atomic Titan, dude. You've got to get him on wrestling. Fucking Little Mike. What is Mike doing here? Yeah. Oh, we don't get to see his performance? It's all about the walkout.
Starting point is 00:08:34 That is the performance. That's 90% of it. Yeah, these days. Yeah, I guess. Nah, enjoy your pay-per-views though, dude. What'd you think of MJF's match last night?
Starting point is 00:08:44 That was pretty good. I liked that it ended in a draw after 30 minutes. That's exactly what happened. Mm-hmm. All right. Draw? They write that. They're like, this is going to end in a draw after 30 minutes.
Starting point is 00:08:58 I'm wanting more. So that's the people want that? He was a second away from getting pinned. So that you don't, you can push it down the road and have another match and sell tickets to it. Has there ever been a wrestler who ignored the writing and was like, no, I'm going to fucking win? No, not really. Yeah, maybe it's happened before. New Jack.
Starting point is 00:09:15 New Jack. He really, I don't think he actually knew that it was wrestling. Bret Hart wanted to. He wanted to, but he didn't. He wanted to? Montreal Screwjob. Oh, yeah. Vince McMahon got punched by Bret Hart.
Starting point is 00:09:30 In the fucking face. Were you in a golden age of wrestling, or is it on the back nine? Definitely not. It's not a golden age or the back nine. It's a very profitable time. There's only one golden age. It's the Attitude Era. There were two golden ages.
Starting point is 00:09:43 The Attitude Era. The Attitude Era. The golden age. The 80s? The Hogan era was the golden age, yes the attitude era there were two golden ages yeah it's for golden age the 80s the hogan era was a golden age yes okay maybe yeah there was a all the old clips i watched seemed way better than today today's great too they just saw aw sold 60 000 tickets to a show in in london well i have no doubt that it's popular it went woke yeah it used to be better when they were like fucking girls on the stage yeah they. They did used to do that.
Starting point is 00:10:05 Fighting them. Yeah. That shit was awesome. You'd love Little Mike. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He fucks on stage. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:10 Yeah. Little Mike fucks on stage. Well, can't Little Mike do? So there hasn't been a golden era since the 90s? There's a golden era in the 80s and a golden era in the 90s, but it's not on the back nine? No, it's not on the back nine, but it's's very very successful now but it's it has settled into its audience it doesn't really get it doesn't go mainstream as often as it used to well maybe they need to start like using the algorithm and stuff like start posting clips maybe they need a tiktok yeah i haven't seen
Starting point is 00:10:38 yeah i guess i see wrestling tiktokers but i don't see the company no what would help is honestly is a is a good wrestling podcast oh maybe even also on youtube yeah that gives me an idea i don't know why he didn't think that was going to be a great idea that would be one of the biggest podcasts in the book okay who's he dave also mgf Well, he wanted too much money. Why didn't you tell him to take less money? I tried. I tried to tell him to take less money and try to tell Dave to give him more money and I couldn't get him to win. You should have had him wrestle. We write the script.
Starting point is 00:11:16 For the cash. Winner gets the cash. What, will you script MJF to win? No. Why? Because then we have more money for Barstool. You work for Barstool, not MJF. I'd rather work for MJF. Why? Because then more money for Barstool. You work for Barstool, not MJF. I'd rather work for MJF. Really? He's mean to you every time.
Starting point is 00:11:31 So is Dave. Oh, yeah. True, true, true. Point, counterpoint. He got you there, Roan. That is good. And a dub. Huh.
Starting point is 00:11:40 Huh. I think we're out of the golden age of television. I was about to ask, what are we in the golden age of now? We're just on the tail end of everything. Social media? Because it feels like even Facebook and Instagram and Twitter are following you. Not Twitter, not Instagram. Yeah, they're all.
Starting point is 00:11:56 Yak? Are we in the golden age of the Yak? Live YouTube shows? Nothing technology-wise. But everybody has a gated outlook on things where people are nostalgic about everything. So it's like no one can live in the moment to diagnose a golden age. It's hard to diagnose a golden age. Streaming shows?
Starting point is 00:12:19 A golden age of binge streaming shows? Documentaries? We might be in the golden age of documentaries because eventually you're going to get to a point where you can't do documentaries about everything's been uncovered. Nothing happens anymore. We might be right at the tail end
Starting point is 00:12:32 of the golden age of documentaries. Oh. Yeah. Has there been any really good documentaries lately? The Jinx was really good. Yeah, March of the Penguins was 20 years ago. That's Seven Summits or whatever, the climbing one. Yeah, that was good. Yeah. I of the Penguins was 20 years ago. That's Seven Summits or whatever, the climbing one.
Starting point is 00:12:45 Yeah, that was good. Yeah. Very good. I'm going to watch the Jared Fogle one on Max, max.com. My bitch ass went to the movie theaters to see March of the Penguins. Really? I took a date. You did?
Starting point is 00:12:58 March of the Penguins. March of the Penguins? Just to hear Morgan Freeman. It was good. What was March of the Penguins? Morgan Freeman narrating a penguin documentary. It just made people feel bad about penguins dying? No, it was just like the migration of them.
Starting point is 00:13:13 They released it as a movie movie. It was planet earthy. Did they assign characters, though? Did they name each penguin or something? Holy shit, I think I might have seen this in theaters as well. It would have been like four. I know. No years old. That's a good seen this in theaters as well. It would have been like four. I know. No years old. That's a good movie to take a
Starting point is 00:13:27 child to. Very good. I think I saw that at the IMAX theater in Boston. Happy Feet was better. Happy Feet is awesome. Surf's Up's better than Happy Feet. Surf's Up is... Can we just watch Surf's Up instead of doing a show today? Yeah. Can we just have the yak intro and just a movie?
Starting point is 00:13:43 Movie day? It's like when the teacher Wheels in the Oh yeah That's what this would be Best feeling in the world And they'd have that thing Strapped
Starting point is 00:13:52 Seatbelt We should open up To the movie theater Where it's Every ticket's a dollar But you don't know What movie you're going to see Like a bargain basement
Starting point is 00:14:00 Movie theater You don't know What I'm talking about Like a clearance rack Movie theater They don't have that They don't have the strapped down TVs anymore? No, I don't know what that is. Would you do that for real?
Starting point is 00:14:10 I think it would be fun to go to. It could be any movie from any... It could be about that. I was thinking about straps. It was Nick's idea. It's a movie theater. You pay a dollar, but you don't know what movie you're going to see. Oh, I like that.
Starting point is 00:14:24 Movie roulette. Yeah. Did you guys ever have theaters growing up where it would be like five bucks or whatever? It would be much cheaper to go, but the movies would be like way out. Six weeks out. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, we had those. Those were sick. No, we had like $5 Tuesdays though. We had Tuesdays
Starting point is 00:14:40 tickets for five bucks. Yep. I used to do it where we did trivia tournament because I used to live right by there. Yep. I used to do it where we did trivia tournament because I used to live right by there in Chicago. They used to do like double headers and they would match them up so it would be like
Starting point is 00:14:51 old school and what's the fucking John Belushi? Animal House. Yeah. You'd pay like five bucks and you'd get to see both of them. That sounds awesome.
Starting point is 00:15:01 And you'd drink there too. Yeah. I like the theme nights where like a movie theater will have a big Lebowski night and everybody comes dressed up and blah, blah, blah. Sometimes I'm just down
Starting point is 00:15:10 to see a movie though, Nick. It's fun. A random, I don't care what I'm seeing. I'm like, oh, I have to see that. It's just like, oh, this feels like a good activity. Imagine the theater erupting.
Starting point is 00:15:18 You're sitting there, you pregame it a little bit and you hear the Jurassic Park theme and you're like, oh, fuck yeah. People clapping at the end. Movies will become a nostalgic thing that everyone does. Like, man, remember that? That was fun.
Starting point is 00:15:32 They are right now. Going to the movie theater now, the smell and everything, I probably do it once a year. Drive-ins are going extinct. Drive-ins are kind of coming back. They're coming back? In like a vintage way. Where are they?
Starting point is 00:15:46 There's one in Brooklyn. When I lived in Queens, they would do like a neighborhood one. One by us, you were allowed to litter. Yeah. Oh, is it encouraged? They were just like, just put it on the ground. That's awesome. Love that.
Starting point is 00:15:58 That's pretty much all of the city of New York. Yeah, you're right. It's gotten dirtier. It's gotten a little dicier. So crazy that when you're just throwing shit out there, you just put it outside. At least right here. What do you mean?
Starting point is 00:16:11 In New York, when you're throwing away trash, you just put it outside on the street. Oh, garbage? Yeah. That's how you do all the dog shit everywhere. You put your personal garbage out? No. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:16:21 You do? Really? Yeah. You don't have a chute? No. Oh. Oh, wow. I have a chute? No. Oh. Oh, wow. I have a trash room.
Starting point is 00:16:27 I bring it down to the trash room, and then it just piles up, and then they put it out. Everywhere I've lived, we've just, no, actually, I have one apartment that we would bring it to.
Starting point is 00:16:36 That's kind of crazy. They just had a big city council meeting like two weeks ago where they were like, should we start doing trash cans soon? Because everyone just, it's just bags. They just,
Starting point is 00:16:44 and so they're, because of the rat problem, they're talking about finally doing trash cans soon? Because everyone just, it's just bags. They just, and so they're, because of the rat problem, they're talking about finally doing trash cans. But those piles are so big. There's not enough trash cans. Trash cans would be gross. Hey, Seth, do you just put it out on a random day or is there a specific day? Dude, any day. So you'll just put trash out there and then like the next three days you'll walk by and
Starting point is 00:16:59 you'll see it's still there. Oh, it's always gone the next morning. Oh. Oh, what? That's got to be somebody at your building then. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah, you're. Dude, this is how it's been. Are you sure you don't have a trash room? This is how it's still there. It's always gone the next morning. Oh. Oh, what? That's got to be somebody at your building then. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah, you're... Dude, this is how it's been.
Starting point is 00:17:07 You sure you don't have a trash room? This is how it's been forever. It's just the guys putting his trash back in the trash room? Yeah, maybe. Maybe. I mean, we have like... I'm trying to think. Even when you move, you just put everything outside.
Starting point is 00:17:19 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it just sits there. Or people just repurpose it. That's a great thing about it. That couch. That blue couch.
Starting point is 00:17:27 That infamous blue couch. That pissed me off. That pissed me off. I would... Maybe... When I lived with Owen and Dukes, all of our furniture was shit that we got outside. Oh, I was going to say it pissed me off
Starting point is 00:17:37 just how quickly people made a meme out of it and it was just like, this is... Yeah, that was lame. I didn't think it was that crazy to take a couch off the street. No, someone probably pissed on it. I did was that crazy to take a couch off the street. No, someone probably pissed on it. I did that once.
Starting point is 00:17:47 I took a couch off the street. And we used to live next to an AA place. And then we took the couch. And then the guy was like, hey, did you guys take that couch? I was like, yeah. I was like, well, someone pissed all over it. I mean, you have to thoroughly clean it when you take a couch off the street, right? We didn't.
Starting point is 00:18:03 No. Didn't you guys have like a beanbag from the street? That's gross. No, it wasn't a beanbag. It was like a big-ass chair beanbag slash thing. Taking a mattress from the street, that's pretty gross. Taking a mattress? Yeah. That's disgusting. I mean, this is like when I was like
Starting point is 00:18:19 22, 23, sprayed it down. I'm about to put all my stuff on the street. I don't want to move everything. Jersey? Couches, ping pong table. What's your address? You should do a yard sale. I might have to, but I don't really want to make money off of it.
Starting point is 00:18:33 I just want to give it away. Three yard sales. I'm giving away my t-shirt collection, all of it. Wait, what? Why? Bring that in. I don't want to move all this stuff. T-shirts are so easy to move.
Starting point is 00:18:42 Yeah, I'll take t-shirts. I want to do a shop at Meadowlands. Wait, why don't you just bring your T-shirts in here and then tell them to send it to the Chicago office? Or give them to me. Then I would have to bring their 2X sash. You can't wear 2X. Yes, you can.
Starting point is 00:18:58 You wear like a tight 2X. It is. As a slim fit. No, I'm... Why don't you get rid of your T-shirt? Novelty T-shirts are... Because I don't want to carry everything. Bring a slim fit. No, I'm... And also T-shirts are tiny. Novelty T-shirts are... Because I don't want to carry everything. Bring it in here. Aren't you hiring a mover?
Starting point is 00:19:11 No, I'm... No, that's... I don't want to spend $12,000 to hire a mover. I'm going to rent a truck. I'm going to hire somebody to load it. I'm going to drive it out there. I'm going to hire somebody to unload it. So the T-shirts, you could hire somebody to load the T-shirts.
Starting point is 00:19:24 You don't even want to pack them. I don't want to pack them. I got way too much stuff for a 26 foot truck. I need to call stuff. You typically can't just put stuff out like you're paying for the pickup. No, if I put a couch out there
Starting point is 00:19:39 and I go on Facebook Marketplace and say free couch at my house, somebody will come get it. Or free ping pong table. or free t-shirts. Size 2XL. Facebook Marketplace is a little funky, though. It is, but it's a one-time deal, right? I mean, you narrow it down to like a mile and then it's never, it's just a lie. I had someone that was like, it was like within a mile,
Starting point is 00:20:05 a TV, 55 inch TV. And I was messaging with them. Then we were like, all right, I'll come get it right now. And they sent me the address and it was in Yonkers.
Starting point is 00:20:14 I was like, I'm not going to fucking Yonkers. That's not a mile. That's not a mile. I remember this. That's more than four miles. To Yonkers? Yeah,
Starting point is 00:20:24 it's more than four miles. It'sonkers? Yeah, it's more than four miles for sure. It's all pretty short. It's all pretty close. It's more than four miles. It takes a while to get there. Yeah. Five miles for me to bike home. Yeah, it's four and a half miles to Brooklyn.
Starting point is 00:20:36 Really? Yes. I don't think you know what a mile is, brother. No idea. What is it? 20 city blocks? 525,000. 14 miles. I thought it was eight city blocks. Oh, eight? I is it? 20 city blocks? 525,000. 14 miles.
Starting point is 00:20:45 I thought it was eight city blocks. Oh, eight? I thought it was 20. I guess it depends on if you go long way or short way. Well, no. Avenues. Yeah, it's more than eight. Short way takes me a minute per block to walk, and long way takes me about three minutes.
Starting point is 00:21:00 Takes you a minute a block? What is it? Low-ass walker. You got to account for that. Yikes. No, no. Yikes. That is kind of.
Starting point is 00:21:08 Okay. Kyle, Kyle, you're like strutting. You're walking seductively slowly. Sauntering. You're sauntering. You guys might be right, but how long does it take you? 20. 20 blocks is a mile.
Starting point is 00:21:18 Have you guys ever timed? Ever timed. I would guess it would take like a... I'm going to say 40 seconds. 50 seconds to a minute and 10 every time. Are you talking about like between six and seven? Sometimes you have to stop. Are you talking about streets?
Starting point is 00:21:29 Or a street. Are you talking about like between six and seven? All you got to say is avenues and blocks. I don't know. I don't know. Avenues go this way. Long buoys or the short buoys? Yeah, the short little guys.
Starting point is 00:21:39 28th or 29th takes you about a minute. Avenues are long. Avenues are very long. It'll take you about a minute. Avenues are like two Avenues are very long. It'll take you about a minute. Avenues are like two miles. It would be tough to do it. You're talking about just casually walking, right? If I wanted to do it in 30 seconds,
Starting point is 00:21:53 I could do it in 30 seconds. Regular pace. Regular gait with your little tiny backpack. A cute little backpack. Not for your body. My backpack is normal size. Not for your body. Gotta get you a bigger backpack. It's a regular size backpack. We'll put it Got to get you a bigger backpack. It's a regular size backpack. We'll put it on. We need a briefcase.
Starting point is 00:22:06 This is a regular size backpack. You get it all tight up top? I like it tight. I don't want it to fall off. Go get it. Go get it. You think it's a tiny backpack? I think what...
Starting point is 00:22:14 Okay, so it's a regular size backpack, but because you like to wear it tight up top, there's a lot of space underneath the backpack. There's a whole man underneath your backpack. Brandon. It is a new backpack day for me. We're a new backpack into the office. Really? I just got underneath the backpack. There's a whole man underneath your backpack. It is a new backpack day for me. We're going to do a new backpack into the office. Really? Tighten it all the way up, Brandon. Tighten it all the way up. And I like the handle touching the back of my neck.
Starting point is 00:22:35 What color backpack? Black. Nice. Went from burgundy to black. Stephen Chay only has one backpack. Loser. I know. Are you guys going to wear less black when you move out of New York? No, I'm going to. Connor had the stat. I had a 10-day streak.
Starting point is 00:22:51 Oh, I realized. I mean, I'm fat. The only shirt I can wear is black. I sweat, so I don't want to wear anything but black. Yeah, I could do navy. You had a 10-day streak going. Of all black? Of all black.
Starting point is 00:23:02 What broke the streak? A dark blue shirt. Oh, damn. Were you aware of the streak? A dark blue shirt. Were you aware of the streak? I mean, if you had asked me, I would have said, yeah, probably. Like, I really don't. If I'm wearing a non-black shirt, that means it's laundry day. Barstool merch. I probably own, like, 12 black shirts.
Starting point is 00:23:22 Got to be the legends to you, right? Yeah. I've seen you. It's nice and comfortable. All my shirts the legends to you, right? Yeah. I've seen you. It's nice and comfortable. All my shirts are either black or dark blue. Yeah. Yeah. Are we in the golden age of any sport right now?
Starting point is 00:23:34 We might be in basketball. We're in the golden age of basketball. I don't think so. I think that was in the Jordan era. But in terms of the play, like the skill level is pretty insane. Look, tell me that doesn't look ridiculous. Are those the straps?
Starting point is 00:23:48 Yes. Why is he holding my almonds like that? That's how he wears them. Like they're going to spill. I'm not crazy. Oh, the coloring makes the straps
Starting point is 00:23:57 look really thin. It's because, look. Brandon, these boys are talking at you, not with you. You know what? That's all they do. It's a perfectly sized backpack. It's just you're a large man and you wear it so high up.
Starting point is 00:24:09 I don't wear it normally. I don't want to fall off. Pay attention. Everyone's talking at you. No, you're not helping. You don't help either. He's talking at you right now. I always want to judge, but you don't help.
Starting point is 00:24:22 You just point out how bad it is. You're afraid to not take your own side. You just commentate on it. Challenge yourself. I'll be fair. It's bigger than I thought. It's a normal-sized backpack. It is bigger than I thought. But it's the way you tighten it. It's more, I think, when I see him out in the wild, and I'm like, there goes
Starting point is 00:24:37 Brandon with his... It makes you more of a lummox, and you're not one. Yeah, right. See? You're like a handsome vacation guy without... You're like, I'm about to go to the dock and fish for a long time Yeah, right. See, you're like a handsome vacation guy without, you're like, I'm about to go to the dock and fish for a long time, and then with that, it's like I've enrolled in college as a grown adult. You're Tom Hanks from Big. I hate the feeling of a loose backpack.
Starting point is 00:24:58 I hate it. What's even in that? My computer. Did someone do the thing where they flipped it over you and you've been scarred? No. That move ruled. Mario McCann in eighth grade did take it and hide it in a trash can, and my mom had to take me up to the school later and find it.
Starting point is 00:25:13 I like this Mario. It's mortifying. You know who he is? No, but he sounds like. His parents are confused. He's not Bucky Cox. He's not. Oh, he's not Bucky Cox.
Starting point is 00:25:22 That's Mario McCann. But he did take my backpack and hid it, and it rained that night, so I had to wet that. Is he an Italian or an Irish? No, he's not either of those things. He's the opposite of both of those things. Ah, that could be one thing. Not Bucky Cox.
Starting point is 00:25:37 Right. Yeah, that makes more sense. Good guy. A name like Mario McCann. I was thinking of a confused white guy. No, no, he's confused with a black guy, I think. An Irish, I tell. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:49 A perverted alcoholic. It's dangerous. I guess Mario McCann. He doesn't know whether to be a firefighter or a cop. Oh, my God. Sass, draw him. Draw not Bucky Cox. I'm all good.
Starting point is 00:26:06 Oh, okay. I forgot you suck at drawing. Yeah. I actually should get Tyler Miller. He's sick at drawing. Is he? He's so good. And he'll just be like, give me an idea of something to draw.
Starting point is 00:26:16 Like a plum getting held hostage by a banana. And he'll just draw it real fast. Yeah, he's always doing it on his iPad. I can't come up with that idea. He always just has his iPad. He's always just doodling iPad. I just had the idea. I don't know. Sass, have you seen
Starting point is 00:26:28 Hank today after you called his car a mom car? No, it's his birthday. You saw him. Birthday was Tuesday. I was walking in and you saw him. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:26:36 That really hurt him. He was very excited about that car. And right away, you could tell in watching the footage back that it like was falling.
Starting point is 00:26:45 No, but it's not your fault because you didn't even think about what you said. No, it just came out. Like a little child calling someone fat. I felt bad. Kind of. Yeah, not really. I felt bad in the moment.
Starting point is 00:26:58 I have not thought about it since until now. No, it's nothing. It's just something he's been working for for a long time. Just his biggest life purchase. Literally his dream car. I find that hard to believe. Dream car. His biggest life purchase, for sure.
Starting point is 00:27:13 Probably, yeah. He bought it cash. Yeah, so. Up 30 racks on that thing. At least. Probably got a terrible deal. Too bad. Great, that bitch.
Starting point is 00:27:25 Big guy, you know the starting salary here is significantly below $100,000 a year? Is it? How would you know? How do you know? Because I'm still way under $100,000. Well, you just started yesterday. Three years. I just saw that TikTok last night at 2 a.m., and then I stayed up until 5 a.m. tossing and turning.
Starting point is 00:27:45 Wait, what was the TikTok? It was just a clip of you and Jerry talking about starting salary. Now Jerry got started at $100,000. You're like, well, you had a following. I'm like, oh shit, Jerry did have a following. How many followers did you have when you got hired? More than he actively has now. Oh, man.
Starting point is 00:28:03 Yeah. No, it's completely different. It is. Well, because I was a child. Child labor. Child labor, yeah. Needs someone to make the t-shirts. What can you do?
Starting point is 00:28:16 Happy to fucking be here, man. Shit. 5 a.m.? What? 5 a.m. 5 a.m., just thinking about that. Yeah, I'm fucking with you. I was up until 5 a.m.? What? 5 a.m. 5 a.m., just thinking about that. Yeah, I'm fucking with you. I was up until 5 a.m.
Starting point is 00:28:28 Thinking about that. And you were thinking also about that. No, I was actually thinking about how we were talking about how I don't want the day to end. Yeah. I just didn't want to go to bed. Yeah. I was like, I'm not tired and I'm having fun. It's the worst decision as an adult you can make, but it happens all the time.
Starting point is 00:28:48 I'll do it a lot of times when I'm on the road. I just won't get up to brush my teeth. I'll be sitting in my hotel room watching TV and just won't get up to brush my teeth. All you have to do is brush your teeth. All you got to do is brush your teeth and you're out. It's also like everyone else that you know is asleep. Yeah. No one's texting you or anything. Fever hours.
Starting point is 00:29:02 Yeah. It's good times. Because you're usually Getting texted so much That it's unbearable To be awake But you can't live In that world
Starting point is 00:29:10 Yeah but it's just like The comfort of No one is Awake Out of order was great Thank you It was That first skip
Starting point is 00:29:17 Slapped You were right I thought it was really funny Yeah I was happy with that one Very good Oh Ayo
Starting point is 00:29:24 Nice They'll never know By the way happy with that one. Very good. Oh! Hey-oh! They'll never know. By the way, we have two new entrants to Roofball next week because Brandon won't be playing and Kate won't be playing. Why, Brandon? You hurt yourself? I'm not going. I tried. I'll
Starting point is 00:29:41 follow up. I tried. It looks like you were going to hit something with that. We're playing in public, right? You should just watch from across the street. Oh, fuck it. What if we put him in a mask? I don't want to play without Brandon. I said all that.
Starting point is 00:29:55 I might Rudy this. Yes, I was like, what if we dress him up? We'll be able to tell from his body. What if he just doesn't speak? Yeah. What if he comes to mind? That's one of those awful things. Is this a fun role for you?
Starting point is 00:30:07 Oh, that would be actually sick if you were defending him. This is real. Is it fun? No. I fought for you. I just want you to know. I went upstairs. And you lost?
Starting point is 00:30:17 I also fought for you. I have lost so far. I will keep fighting. It would be funny if you came as a mime and you had to do roof ball as a mime. If I come and they said not to come and I come, I'm going to get fired. No. I'll ask that. No.
Starting point is 00:30:32 You're not going to get fired. Wait. Don't you know the people across the street from that house? Aren't you good friends? Yeah, I do. The Wilkerson's, yeah. They're still there? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:30:40 Why don't you just go over there? Justin and Janine. So we have two new entrants. Physical comedy was a premium. So it's Chris Clemmer and Jersey Jerry are going to compete. Oh, hell yeah. That'll be fun. I thought that would be good.
Starting point is 00:30:53 I could see Clemmer winning the whole thing. He's going to care. Oh, my God. This is the most shocking. That actually is not real. Play the video. That ain't real. Yeah, it is.
Starting point is 00:31:04 That's his real finger? His video. That ain't real. Yeah, it is. That's his real finger? His video. Oh, it keeps growing. Wait, what now? Oh, play the video. I think Hubs treated the video. That's how a new Clemmer's born. His middle finger breaks off and just spawns into a new one.
Starting point is 00:31:17 That was unsettling to see. I was here working until like midnight, and I went on Twitter for the first time, and I saw that as the first treat, and I went on Twitter for the first time, and I saw that as the first tweet, and I was like, what the fuck? Mets win. My scorebook got a little wrinkled in all my excitement. Mets win. Unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:31:35 I mean, the Yankees steal home. It doesn't matter. Berl Anders, six innings, great job. Unbelievable win. Extra innings. This is a World Series? Fuck you, Marty. Let's go, great job. Unbelievable win. Extra innings. This is the World Series. Fuck you, Marty. Let's go, Mets.
Starting point is 00:31:48 Let's go, Mets. Let's go, Mets. Let's go, Mets. Fuck you. Oh, man. Oh, my God. He is a creature. He looks like a scientist from a movie about the 40s.
Starting point is 00:32:05 I was going to say, he could. You're right. He just discovered something that we now know. Yeah. You guys do the straight middle finger? I have a. What do you mean? A finger next to mine.
Starting point is 00:32:17 Oh, like that straight. You can't put it down? You can't put that down, Brandon? I loved doing this as a kid. Oh, yeah. I wasn't giving you the finger, though. Yeah. I'll do that to my parents. Oh, yeah. I wasn't giving you the finger, though. Yeah. I'd do that to my parents.
Starting point is 00:32:25 Yeah. Boy, it wasn't. It wasn't the finger. It was the other one. It was like you put up this finger and put it in between. Oh, yeah, yeah. So Clemmer either is going to win or he's going to slip down a storm drain. Or get picked up by a hawk.
Starting point is 00:32:41 Yeah. He just falls off the curb and is just like, oh, there he goes. The clown got him. Not again. He will be good if we lose the ball in a tight spot. He'll be able to go get it. He'll sliver up the gutter.
Starting point is 00:32:58 I've been watching videos of these dudes that just climb into caves. They don't even do anything. They just get into the smallest space as possible. So scary. He should do that. Yeah. Isn't there one in New York? Like the sidewalk? Like you can just go under the sidewalk. There's always like silly people
Starting point is 00:33:13 coming out from it. It's like a sinkhole in somebody's front on the sidewalk. The guy like set up a little beach chair in there. He like only enough for a clever body. They like dress dressing like top hats like they're coming out of a fucking,
Starting point is 00:33:27 I want to see this. What did you say about Clemmer when he was here for a bar stool? I don't know how he was like on all floors on the ceiling.
Starting point is 00:33:34 He went to the bathroom. He had a crab walking. His head fucking spinning all the way. He turned the lights off and he, or he turned the lights on, and he just falls right to the floor. Falls away. Yeah, he is, what was that movie, the Mel Gibson, M. Night Shyamalan?
Starting point is 00:33:57 Signs? Signs, yeah. He's one of the aliens. Yeah, crossing the street. I've never seen Signs. Very good movie. Is it good? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:04 Is it spooky? They're aliens. It's kind of dumb. It's aliens. Dumb, but it was. I've never seen Signs. Very good movie. Is it good? Yeah. Is it spooky? They're aliens. It's kind of dumb. It's aliens. Dumb, but it was... This is dumb. It was when M. Night was still hot. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:10 So it was like... That was his heat check movie. His golden era. Yeah. That was the last one. A lot of old spooky movies aren't that spooky. No one... People did not fuck with The Village.
Starting point is 00:34:20 People did not fuck with The Village. The Village was good. Oh, what about... Didn't he do... I stand corrected. Did you spit? Che's hammered right now, by the way. Are you?
Starting point is 00:34:28 Slam in high noons. I'm a couple sips into a strawberry tequila seltzer. What's the occasion? I'm just thirsty. Oh. That's what he said. I was like, why... Che, daddy.
Starting point is 00:34:39 Look at you. You're a beast. Che is a zaddy. Is he? Wait a minute. Yeah, he puts that pussy to sleep. Yeah. I learned that the other day. Is that what makes is a zaddy. Is he? Wait a minute. Yeah, he puts that pussy to sleep. Yeah. I learned that the other day.
Starting point is 00:34:48 Is that what makes you a zaddy? Do you beat the pussy up, Che? He puts it to sleep. Yeah, do you do that move where you slap it on the... He tucks that pussy. Prep it. Do you? You definitely do that.
Starting point is 00:35:00 No comment. And he sips. You definitely make something like grin when you're doing it. Football players smacking the bub at the end. Play like a champion today. Spins that pussy like a pizza dough. He does it like John Henderson slaps the fuck out of it before it goes out there.
Starting point is 00:35:15 I imagine after Che gets done fucking he has one of those squirt Gatorade bottles and he's just open mouth. Oxygen tank. Tap in the top of his head. Take me out. Take me out. Puts on the big coat that quarterbacks put on.
Starting point is 00:35:35 And then he goes in. Yeah, he definitely does. No, he probably does. Then he definitely puts on the coat that he pulls up the Microsoft Surface to rewatch. Watch the footage on the Surface. Should have done this. All right. I didn't read that correctly. Yeah Should have done this. All right. I didn't read that correctly.
Starting point is 00:35:48 Fuck. All right. I got to see where that's coming from. Pressure from the left side. Damn it. All right. Next series. Whips it off.
Starting point is 00:36:00 That's a funny sketch idea. Yeah. Just reviewing it Yeah He's available Jack The big ass jacket Is so funny
Starting point is 00:36:09 I have one I think you do it Just make it underneath Do it the guy comes In like ten seconds And he's just replaying The ten seconds Back and forth
Starting point is 00:36:19 Being like Oh fuck okay See what I did wrong here Dude that's fucking Your wife is coaching you next to you. He comes out with a big whiteboard. It's blowing up the next play. Listen, guys.
Starting point is 00:36:33 And then it pans out and there's a fucking, it's like they're at ESPN and there's the dude's drawing on the board. Highlighting things. He's got the trainer's table and they hit him with the hamstring gun. He's just laying down Getting all the cramps out Along his dick shaft They're gunning his heart gone
Starting point is 00:36:54 Yeah he finishes And he's got like the ice wrapped Like a pitcher But it's around his cock Post game press conference In his locker. That was a funny visual. Riff, good riff.
Starting point is 00:37:09 Hey, Riff. Hey, you have one of those jackets? Yeah, he does. It's my Bucks winter jacket. Remember when he brought the pads in? Oh, yeah. On the train? Pictures of it? I forget what it is. He looks so ridiculous. Johnny Unitas. Really?
Starting point is 00:37:24 Yeah, it was Johnny Unitas on the train. I don't think I've ever seen this. Oh, it looks so ridiculous. He looks like Johnny Unitas. Really? Yeah, he's Johnny Unitas on the train. I don't think I've ever seen this. Oh, it's so great. I had legitimate shoulder pads on. He thought he was like, he's like pulling a fast one. He's like, no one knows I have shoulder pads on. I was bringing them in because I had them in my garage. And I forget, I really like, my wife was like, please get rid of these.
Starting point is 00:37:42 And I was like, all right. And I asked you if you wanted them. You're like, yeah, sure, bring them in. I don't know where they are. They were in the PMT studio for years. I think Gay Pat used them for something. I don't know. Why don't you do the High Noon ad while you're drinking one?
Starting point is 00:37:57 And let's find that picture. Sure. This guy knows how it's done, too. Former AdOps guy. Turned good. Facts. this guy knows how it's done too former adops guy turned good thanks if you're a tequila lover who has never been satisfied with the malt seltzer offerings you're gonna love the new high noon tequila seltzer my favorite is strawberry right here um premium hard seltzer so strawberry i haven't had i had the passion for the other day i you guys like the lime i really like the lime too
Starting point is 00:38:22 made with real tequila and real juice. Clean finish because it's made with real Blanco tequila. Only 100 calories, gluten-free, and no added sugars. High Noon Tequila Seltzer is now available nationwide in four bright, crisp flavors. Lime, strawberry, grapefruit, and passion fruit. High Noon Tequila Seltzer is great in the outdoors, especially around the pool, lake, beach, golf, or tailgating. Look for them at Drizzly and at your local convenience store or liquor store, or visit highnoonspirits.com to find it near you. Again, strawberry, my favorite. Just good for hanging out with the boys.
Starting point is 00:38:54 Every week we do the bracket, I have one of these. It's great. Hell yes, Che. Look at him. He's like, no one knows I have pads on. They're like linebacker pads. Someone pointed out that I look like Groot. Yeah, I was going to say.
Starting point is 00:39:21 Or no, not Groot. Groo. From Despicable Me. Damn, Willie. Old school. Looking at Adam not Groot. Grew. From Dispensable Family. Damn, Willie. Old school. Thinking of Adam's family. Oh, man. You're one in a billion, Shay.
Starting point is 00:39:33 Man, shout out Willie. Shout out Willie. That's a lot of weight. Really? Yeah. Looks good. Never made it out to one of his New Jersey parties. I tried, but I bailed. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:39:44 One, they were fun. Those parties are incredible. I went to his parties. I tried, but I bailed. What a one they were fun. His parties are incredible. I went to his daughter's birthday party, and it was like a party. It was awesome. I couldn't find a parking spot in the neighborhood, so I just said, fuck it, too many people. That's the saddest thing ever. Oh, man. What about a curb?
Starting point is 00:39:59 I only live two miles away from him, so it was very easy. Were you invited? I got the same invite the whole office guy. That would have been even sadder if you weren't invited. Did a drive-by? Yeah, like, oh, what's going on there? You guys ever have a kid in high school
Starting point is 00:40:14 who called the cops on a party he wasn't invited to? No. Why did you do that? No, I didn't. There was a rumor that one kid did it, though. Actually, I never have ever been to a party where the cops have been called. Really? Every party for me.
Starting point is 00:40:30 Really? Yeah, it was a common occurrence. Yeah, that never happened. College or high school? High school. Did you run? I hid in closets, so one for two. One for two and hiding in closets?
Starting point is 00:40:48 That must have been a thrill no because i had one beer and they still got arrested that's not a thrill but i'm saying like the one time you did get hot hidden the closet and were able to get away with it successfully yeah did you put clothes like yeah but the cops didn't end up uh arrest anyone. They just warned us. So, yeah, it sucked. Hiding in a closet, just throwing a bunch of coats on yourself. I think a good hiding spot is fucking awesome. I haven't done it in a long time. I was too good at hide-and-seek. Yeah, they would never find me.
Starting point is 00:41:15 Apparently not, bro. These cops were on your ass. Did you see that dude in Turkey who was taking down a wall in his house and found an old underground city? Yeah. What? Like 20,000 people used to live in just under his house and found like a old underground city. Yeah. What? Like 20,000 people used to live in just under his house. His house? Yeah, behind his wall.
Starting point is 00:41:30 He was like chasing a chicken, right? How big was his house? It was under. Isn't that crazy? A whole cave system of like, there was like cemeteries under there. What? Yeah. There was like a whole.
Starting point is 00:41:41 Did you see it? Was there pictures? There's pictures. Oh, okay. Does it look cool? Yes. Yeah. Very cool. Yeah. What do you think happens in that visuals? There's pictures. Oh, okay. Does it look cool? Yes. Yes. Very cool.
Starting point is 00:41:46 Yeah. What do you think happens in that situation? You think they're like, you got to move. We got to fucking. I think he owns it. Wait, there were lights in it? He's chasing his chickens through a hole? What?
Starting point is 00:41:58 Did he put those lights in there? I'm sure they put the lights. I'm sure they put the lights. That would be really creepy. That looks pretty modern. Like someone, you find like a microwave meal that's warm. If you found this in your place at night, would you still sleep in your house? Hell no.
Starting point is 00:42:13 I would leave, right? Hell no. Why? That would be the coolest thing ever. Some goony shit. Remember that New York City apartment where the woman was like, what's this hole behind my medicine cabinet? And she opened it up and she was able to crawl through into a whole other empty house or something. What?
Starting point is 00:42:29 It was like a direct thing that happened. This guy found a city in his house. Yeah. Yeah. It says a Turkish city that once housed 20,000 people. Wait, this is a new article. Yeah, this was like yesterday. Wow.
Starting point is 00:42:43 It's crazy that people. Wait, that's today. How did they not know that was there? Yeah, I don't know. How would you know? I want to see the hole that like. I want to see the hole in the house. At some point somebody knew it was there.
Starting point is 00:42:57 That's insane. That's beautiful. It really is. Look at that fucking stonework. Definitely got to be a lot of graves in there. Does he own it now? Probably 20,000. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:43:08 How does something of that size get cut off forever and people forget about it is what I want to know. Some dude had to have been building over it. Yeah, right. I don't feel like telling anyone about this. Yeah, yeah. He'll be in for a surprise in 2023. Yeah. I'm going to make someone's day when they find about no chance that was on
Starting point is 00:43:26 his bingo card right we decided the aliens 2024 are the aliens real are the aliens i don't believe it the guy the reason why i don't believe it is that i watched the video and they were like yeah there was a object in my backyard and they're like where's the video like did you take a video of it it was the police going to the backyard and they're like yeah we saw it we swear we saw it who doesn't take out their phone yeah that's great video of it yeah i want to see video not real debunked not familiar there was las vegas yeah i guess u UFO sighting and then someone called the cops and was like there's a creature, like an 8 foot tall creature in my backyard right now.
Starting point is 00:44:10 Kept saying it's not human. But they didn't take a video of it. Then wasn't there the UFO sighting? You're fighting for your life, brother. You're not trying to take a video. You're in your house. You're definitely taking a video. If they saw it, you'd take a video. Yeah, I disagree with that You're definitely taking a video. If they saw it, you take a video.
Starting point is 00:44:28 Yeah, I disagree with that. Do people take videos in scenarios where they're fighting for their life constantly? Yeah. We get videos of everything. Actually, like, the first thing people
Starting point is 00:44:33 think to do, I think. Yeah. If you saw an eight-foot tailed whale, yeah. I'd fucking hightail it. I would. People are... Leave your house?
Starting point is 00:44:41 They didn't leave their house. Take videos. Go hide in the basement. Like, do some... Those things... Well, where did it go, then? Where did it go? They don't have basements in Las Vegas. Where did it go, house. They didn't leave their house. Take videos. Go hide in the basement. Like, do some of those things. Well, where did it go then? Where did it go? They don't have basements in Las Vegas.
Starting point is 00:44:48 Where did it go, Steven? They don't? I don't think so. I don't think you can have a basement in that type of climate. That feels like the perfect climate for a basement. Why is it? It's cooler in basements. Maybe because of flooding?
Starting point is 00:44:58 Flash flooding? Flash flooding? I'm completely speaking with no factual. I think the ground's like a rock. We don't really have basements in the south I feel like if there's flash flood ability like they don't do basements Again I've
Starting point is 00:45:12 completely made this part up Do you have a basement Jay? I do Are you in a flash flood area? Not flash Well regular 100 year flood But yeah I would not take a video I would try and save my own life
Starting point is 00:45:28 but where do you think that the alien skedaddled off to afterwards if it's 8 feet tall no one else saw it it didn't go into the neighbor's yard
Starting point is 00:45:36 it didn't just sprint into the desert did it die did it get like re-assumed by the it's vessel was there a corroborating
Starting point is 00:45:44 I read Jerry's blog but I forget it was a couple days ago was there a corroborating? I read Jerry's blog, but I forget. It was a couple days ago. Was there a corroborating neighbor who called the same thing in? I don't think so. Jerry wrote the blog? Jerry Thornton. Oh. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:56 Finger painted it. Jersey Jerry's not writing. Aliens fuck the teacher. Nevada is like the spookiest place in the world. It is. Yeah. All right. All right. Footage from the world. It is. Yeah, all right. All right, footage from the backyard. So they did take video?
Starting point is 00:46:09 Yeah, but not really. Yeah, this is after the fact. They're putting their finger on the pulse. It feels just like signs, the bomb and its children scene. I'd argue it's not nice stonework. Tell me, this is Las Vegas? What am I looking at in the circle? Why is there a wrought iron gate and a wooden fence?
Starting point is 00:46:36 Screenshot of the video that shows the alien. If you guys understood what they were saying, you'd be freaking out right now. Why would they be outside if they think there's an 8-foot creature out there? I don't see any shit in that circle. Apparently that's the eyes right there, the black part. What? Where? I don't see shit.
Starting point is 00:46:59 I don't see shit. This is supposed to be the hard evidence that there are now aliens? We might be in the golden age of aliens. I don't know what's going on with the sky. That seems like there's something up. I don't even know what the red circle is. I see what on the right is what we see in the red circle now. But what?
Starting point is 00:47:21 That's it? Yeah, there's just no way an alien would come to Earth with iPhones and someone wouldn't have video of it. Also, the idea that aliens are these big head, skinny body creatures is completely fiction, right? Correct. It's just people decided that would be cool if aliens looked like that. They might be like a plasma or a gel. They might not even have bodies. What if they're just worms?
Starting point is 00:47:44 Yeah. They'd be smarter to not have bodies. If they're smart enough to get here, they probably should shed this earthly vessel. Yeah, bodies suck. Terrible. Bodies do suck. They're going to be like bugs. But wasn't there like a whole UFO sighting thing like the same night?
Starting point is 00:47:58 Yeah. There's a police footage of a green thing going down to the earth. In Vegas, though? Because that could be anything. It's probably Blaine. It is probably Blaine. Blaine returning home. Going over.
Starting point is 00:48:10 It might be Shaq. It's Blaine or Mind Freak. Did we see that video? What? Of the green thing going down to earth? I thought you wanted to watch Mind Freak. I thought you wanted to see Shaq float over the roof.
Starting point is 00:48:26 I don't know. Official statement? I don't know. Can we go around and say whether you guys believe in aliens? I believe in aliens. That's a glare on a camera. That could be a street light. That could be a drone.
Starting point is 00:48:41 It looks like someone was driving and there was a glare. It's almost midnight on May 1st when a Las Vegas Metro police officer's body can't catch this. Yeah, that's kind of cool. Something flashing low in the sky. But drones are everywhere now. Right. There's like an eight-foot person beside it.
Starting point is 00:48:55 This is the person. And another one's inside and it has big eyes and is looking at us. And it's still there. This is what I'm talking about. It's still there. He calls the cops with his phone. He doesn't take video. That doesn't bother me. I don't take video. That's doesn't.
Starting point is 00:49:05 I don't believe it. I don't think Mexican people do shit for attention. They're straight shooters. Yeah. Not all of them. Not all Mexicans. I've known duplicitous Mexicans. They're not like they're not.
Starting point is 00:49:19 Are they performative? Can't think of a showy Mexican. I'm talking about these people like, yeah, I was standing here. We don't. Look how many people there are. None of a showy Mexican. That's what I'm talking about. These people are like, yeah, I was standing here. We don't... Look how many people there are. None of them took a video. He would lie to whoever's talking. All right.
Starting point is 00:49:38 I'm not going to lie, guys. We actually saw something fall out of the sky about a couple minutes ago. We think it was aliens. But what about Chupacabra and shit like that? Wouldn't you be more concerned like, oh, it's an animal, rather than they're all jumping to like, it's aliens? Damn, Nick, really showing off those guns. You look awesome.
Starting point is 00:49:58 I saw a video of Pete Davidson playing basketball. You guys have a similar frame that you could achieve easily. By the end of summer, I want Shaolin tattooed over my stomach. Just like him. Do you have any tummy tattoos? Are you guys the same height? No, he's way taller than me. Oh, yeah, he is tall.
Starting point is 00:50:13 You like that? Nice with it. Does that make you happy? What? Nothing. Yeah, look at him hooping. Is Pete Davidson tall? Every tweet is Daily Loud, by the way.
Starting point is 00:50:20 Oh, my God. Daily Loud runs. Every tweet he watches has been Daily Loud. Shout out to those two white dorks Handles a little bit high I mean they gotta be letting him right Still looks impressive Wait is this in Vegas?
Starting point is 00:50:39 The goofy gate Maybe he's the alien And they saw a weird 8 foot guy walking around at night Staring. Big eyes. Big butthole eyes. Interesting. He knows who he is.
Starting point is 00:50:55 He knows he has fucking gross butthole eyes. What's going on here? A little picture. This is Girls Gotta Eat podcast. Fabulous. What do they talk about? They talk about everything. A little picture's coming. Photo op. This is Girls Gotta Eat podcast. Oh. Fabulous. What do they talk about? They talk about everything. A lot of dating.
Starting point is 00:51:10 A lot of like, they just moved to LA. Sorry, I've been following them for a long time. I think they're great. Are they nice? Yes, they're super nice. They're really lovely. Are they hot? They're huge.
Starting point is 00:51:18 No, they're very pretty. Yeah, they sell out concert venues for their podcast. Wow. Damn. Their live shows are like a whole production. It's crazy. Do they sell out MSG? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:51:31 I have no idea. No, no, no. Could they sell out MSG? Probably not. Bring them in here. Have them face Sass. Brandon, I want you to come next Thursday. The less we talk about it, the better
Starting point is 00:51:47 it is for me. Why? What about prosthetics? That's correct. What if we made you like... I can't. I think you should leave. If I can't go, I can't go. So I'm not going to go. You should just fucking get them all
Starting point is 00:52:03 prosthetic'd up. That would be hilarious. What if fucking get them all prosthetic-ed up. Yeah. That would be hilarious. What if we get someone else prosthetic-ed up and they try and rip the nose off thinking it's you and it's just someone else underneath the prosthetic and they look like idiots? Or you get an actual person that looks like they're prosthetic-ed up. Yeah, I'll go.
Starting point is 00:52:20 You try to rip their face off. Mumpto. It's just their face. I wonder if Tommy can come. My son? Yeah. Mumpto. It's just their face. I wonder if Tommy can come. My son? Yeah. Oh, yeah. You should invite Tommy.
Starting point is 00:52:30 He might be really good at it. He just chaperones him. Oh, yeah. He gets to stay in the car. Well, he has to have a guardian with him. He has to have a guardian. Uncle Nicky. You watch from the car.
Starting point is 00:52:40 Uncle Nicky guardians. You smoke cigs in the car. Talk about manga. Tommy, why are you reading that book right to left? God damn it. I love Roan's Brandon voice. I really do. It's the best.
Starting point is 00:52:57 My favorite. Yeah, it's good. It's a good voice. God damn it. AB? He's got to stick up for himself. Yeah, he'll learn. We're just having a conversation now.
Starting point is 00:53:09 There's no shots being thrown. You're thinking about it now that I brought it up. Well, no, I'm thinking that I can't come, which is crazy. You can't? I can come. It's not next Thursday. Talk to Che. Ronan, is Carl Anthony Towns getting a lot of backlash?
Starting point is 00:53:25 Yeah, it's going. It's blowing up. I would assume so. What did he say? He was very bold about his, he's like, when I retire, people will say I changed the game. And people were pissed off. Has the Daily Loud picked it up?
Starting point is 00:53:43 It's not that big. But it's... No, Draymond tweeted it. Yeah, Draymond was talking about it like, damn, when people come on your podcast, they become legends. We'll check out for when Draymond comes on our podcast eventually. Soon. For some of the most irrational and passionate people in the world,
Starting point is 00:54:01 NBA fans hate any display of confidence in oneself. I know. Why? KD tweet. Like. NBA fans hate any display of confidence in oneself. I know. Why? KD tweet, like, NBA fans are so lame, they hate everything about the NBA. That sucks. That's just fandom in 2023, isn't it? Yeah, because have you seen, like,
Starting point is 00:54:15 there's a backlash now to Jokic, like, losing his MVP trophy? Turning on him? Yeah, it's like, dude, he's being authentic. I don't know. I think, ah. Really? You're siding with Nate?
Starting point is 00:54:26 Yeah. You're getting a little tired of it. But it's wearing a little thing. It's like Adam Sandler wearing shitty clothes. We get it. You don't care. But, like, he's not even online, is he? So what was his, like—
Starting point is 00:54:36 There's no end goal. Yeah. KB's right. There's no, like, payoff. He loves people who are just like, I love that he just doesn't care. I don't think he even knows. I think he wants to just go home and be done with it. Yeah, I've never seen him play League of Legends.
Starting point is 00:54:51 Serbians don't do things for attention. I've never seen a showy Serbian. It's the Mexico of Eastern Europe. Of the Eastern Bloc. Damn. Yeah, I'm still on Team Jokic. I'm not going to dump him. I just love basketball for basketball.
Starting point is 00:55:05 I love the artistry. That's why I don't understand even a LeBron hater. He's awesome. He's awesome to watch play basketball. That's fine. But saying Carl Anthony Towns, best hitter in the league, is kind of crazy. The day after Jokic wins a championship. He said that or you said that?
Starting point is 00:55:21 I didn't say shit. He said that? Pat Bev said it about him. He was bigging his boy up. Yeah, I wonder if – Is Pat Bev not no ball? Or maybe he knows something we don't. Pat Bev doesn't no ball.
Starting point is 00:55:34 He's going to go back to Minnesota, isn't he? I don't know because they're trying to trade Carl Anthony Towns in Minnesota. So maybe they'll link up somewhere. Trying to trade a legendary – Oh, so he's – Yeah, it would be the biggest mistake they ever made. Trying to get Karl-Anthony Towns to bring him wherever he goes. Probably.
Starting point is 00:55:48 They're probably trying to link up, trying to click up. They just talked about how much fun they had together and how great the times were, like just hanging out. He was basically the hut, just being like, I just like going out and eating with the guys. I just like hanging out with the team. What voice did Karl-Anthony Townsend have? Doesn't he have three voices that he uses?
Starting point is 00:56:07 He gave me this one. You got the high one? He gave me the sassy one. He was loving it. He's great, though. Great guy. Going out to dinner with the boys is fun. I love it.
Starting point is 00:56:19 They would have like a wine room. They'd have like a chill room at the at the facility they're talking about how much they loved minnesota like minnesota's underrated and then minnesota yeah and then going to different cities it would be like they were unleashed so it's not like someone from miami having to go to minnesota and it sucks they acclimated to minnesota and then they got to miami and it's bonus vacation like that's the biggest cope in the entire world. That's why I love living in Minnesota because when we leave it's great. That's why I love bagels because
Starting point is 00:56:49 you can take out some bagel and make it taste good. It's like when I'm like, I would never have wanted to go to a warm weather climate for college. Imagine how miserable you'd be when you'd have to leave once. Yeah, and you'd have to wear shorts. I'd rather be cold all day.
Starting point is 00:57:05 More excitement, yeah. That's funny, though, that he... By the way, Brandon, you, in your debate last night, you did dominate cons when he was like, New York has the most three-star Michelin restaurants. Yeah. What was the... Give me, like, a down-south home-cooked meal
Starting point is 00:57:24 over Les Bernardins all day. Yeah, all day. All day. Michelin star restaurants are great to put on a postcard, but that's not everyday life. That's not how you should judge it. That's not life. You're not going there every day. Savannah was the best food I've ever had.
Starting point is 00:57:38 Savannah is an incredible food city. So good. Charleston's better. What kind of food did you get there? Charleston is better than Savannah. I got all of it. Is your argument that New York's not a good food city? No, that's not my argument at all.
Starting point is 00:57:48 But he argued that I have bad taste because I take shots at bagels and New York foods. And his argument to argue that a food city is great based on three-star Michelin restaurants is a dumb argument, in my opinion. Yes. Where does everyone eat? That's not the heart of New York food anyway. New York has great food, but I wouldn't be like, New York has great food, Les Bernardins. That would be a dumb argument.
Starting point is 00:58:14 You'd have to be insane. That's like French food anyway. If you're going to argue New York, it's pizza. I would say pizza's good. I kind of, yeah, pizza's good. I kind of got a take on that, too. Oh. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:58:29 Pizza in New York is great. You can get pretty good pizza everywhere. Okay. You can get pretty good pizza in Chicago. I'm a crust guy. I don't like the crust here. You can, where I'll disagree, I think the floor for New York pizza is higher than any other city. But when you go to another city, you're not going to sample the floor.
Starting point is 00:58:45 I understand, but you don't, like, you really, it'd be very hard to get a bad slice of pizza. If I'm going to a new city, I'm tasting the ceiling at every turn. I agree. But I'm saying, like, if you live in the city. If you're in Louisville, I bet you can get some good pizza. Bucking up pizza's tough. If you're in Kenosha, I bet you can get some good pizza. I think it could, good pizza in Palm Springs.
Starting point is 00:59:03 It's wet. Yeah, it was damp. Remember that wet ass pizza? It was slippery. Yeah. It got wet out of my it could good pizza in Palm Springs. It's wet. Yeah, it was damp. Remember that wet ass pizza? It was slippery. Yeah. It's got wet pizza. Wet pizza's the worst. Subs and hoagies
Starting point is 00:59:10 is tough to find outside of the northeast, I think. Colorado Springs? I've been a lot of places where I'm like, I cannot find a good sandwich here.
Starting point is 00:59:16 Oh, wet pizza. No matter what I do. I think the biggest thing that New York has going for it food-wise is just how vast it is. There's so many options, so that means that there's a lot of good places,
Starting point is 00:59:29 but there's probably a lot of places in Queens where you could get Dominican food or the home-cooked meals that you're looking for. It's just a broad swath. Have you been to Nene's? No. What's that? I got to whip over to Nene's. It's fucking unbelievable.
Starting point is 00:59:46 I'm trying to think of like a... What is your guys' favorite restaurant in New York? Fish Market. That's not a restaurant. Yeah, it is. Is that a bar? That's food first, man. I've had the food there.
Starting point is 00:59:58 It's deece. My favorite. What's your favorite? Chick-fil-A. You also... Yeah. I just stumbled on that fact. All right.
Starting point is 01:00:11 I'll never say I have a sophisticated... The house of cards just falls down. It's like a chicken finger kid. He literally lives on Chick-fil-A having food to bake. If there was better food in New York, he'd get something else. Yeah. That's on New York. Be Chick-fil-A, New York.
Starting point is 01:00:24 You can do it. I just realized. Lomo Saltado started eating that up here. They have good Lomo Saltado everywhere. Not everywhere. Everywhere in New York. We've ordered from multiple places.
Starting point is 01:00:39 I would kill for some Saltado today. My goodness, I'm hungry. What's your favorite restaurant, Big Head? Oh. I like John's at Bleaker Street. Nene's is a place that I will miss. That's a good take. I just said I liked it, man.
Starting point is 01:00:56 I don't know what you want from me. Shit on him, Sass. Why are you rooting for him? I'm on it. Okay. I live next to a burrito taco place. That's where you dunk it. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 01:01:08 It's a taco place in Chinatown. It's good, too. I don't go to good restaurants. I should start doing that. I just go to wherever's closest to my apartment. You're not drinking? Let me take you out to dinner tonight, Sass. My favorite places aren't restaurants.
Starting point is 01:01:19 They're like... Ours. No, we're like a Mexican place that's like... It's a restaurant. Yeah, actually, Nene's kind of isn't. It's like a Ours. No, or like a Mexican place that's like... It's a restaurant. Yeah, actually, Nene's kind of isn't. It's like a convenience store. That place, Federov's in Williamsburg. They got great...
Starting point is 01:01:34 Roast pork? Yeah, roast pork, chicken cutlet, steak and cheese. That place is awesome. Muscle Maker Grill. Oh, yeah. That's just hell. Gotta have their shrimp bites. Just salad. Too much of it. It sucks. Grill. Oh, yeah. That shit's kind of crap. You've got to have their shrimp bites. Just salad.
Starting point is 01:01:47 Too much of it. It sucks. I can't eat anymore. Chipotle. Eva's Health. Oh, Eva's. I live right next to it. That's slop.
Starting point is 01:01:54 Yeah. Westville, like, every day, which is good. Westville, I can't eat anymore. What? I ate that too much. Can't eat anymore. What were you getting there? Like a salmon and mashed potato asparagus.
Starting point is 01:02:06 I got that a couple times, and then I got the chicken sandwich, and I hated it. I got a turkey burger there once, and it was the worst turkey burger I've ever had. They'll make it in one second. Really? Yeah. I go to Westville like every day. I hated it. Getting over it.
Starting point is 01:02:19 They get it so fast. Do Chicago have diners? Do they have a good diner scene out there? It seems like it would be a big diner place, right? What is Gen Z doing about food? That's a great breakfast place right by the Chicago office. What's Gen Z eating? They're not drinking as much.
Starting point is 01:02:32 They don't do anything. They don't fuck. They don't drink. I saw they're not banging. They don't fuck. What are you talking about? Are you guys judging this off of the people who post and they're like, they don't fuck as much as millennials because they're on antidepressants.
Starting point is 01:02:43 I don't know if that's true. No, you don't fuck, you don't drink, you don't do shit. What do you do? Nothing. I fucking don't. Big Magic Johnson. What has he ever done? You got AIDS.
Starting point is 01:02:57 What do you do? There is like a, I mean, but that's just the internet. The shame around drinking. It's my favorite clip ever. Like, I'm not like this generation. I do not drink. You guys know that guy? Let's do an accent.
Starting point is 01:03:10 That's what he sounds like. The big event happening tonight. Oh, yeah. Is that the guy you sent? Oh, yeah. The guy. I fucked with his message. He delivered it poorly.
Starting point is 01:03:19 Oh, you're going out? Cool. Well, that's not for me. There's going to be girls there and drinks. Yeah. Well, that's not for me. I hate him so much. What is his necklace that he wears?
Starting point is 01:03:29 It's like a microphone. Oh, is that what that is? It's a microphone. I didn't know if it was like a religious thing. He's the worst person on earth. You know more about him? I kind of like him. Dude, he sucks.
Starting point is 01:03:38 I got to see him. It's somewhere in the Yakker chat. Post videos being like, I'm not for this generation. I don't cheat. I don't drink. There's a crazy event happening. There'll be a ton of chicks. Let's just go have fun
Starting point is 01:03:49 and let go a little. Yeah, that ain't my kind of fun. You know what's fun for me? Waking up early, hitting the gym, spending time with my creator, building the life I desire, and more importantly,
Starting point is 01:04:02 becoming a better version of myself every damn day so if your kind of fun is getting shit-faced over the weekend that's cool but we don't do that over here we're focusing my ilk needs better communicators because he's yeah love that he's like an AI robot that's what all of his videos are yes that's actually like that one goes viral all the time though they're the other ones are way Any of these are worse than that one. Click on any one of these. Like, these dudes think they're changing the world.
Starting point is 01:04:37 That sometimes God's blessings are not in what he gives, but in what he takes away. He doesn't know how to gesticulate. You know what's been weird to me? Is anybody following Mark Wahlberg on Instagram? Oh, yeah, but he's awesome. Stay blessed.
Starting point is 01:04:52 This guy's just doing this to get pussy, right? Yes. No one wears that or is wasted without trying to get pussy. These guys, their whole thing is like, I don't need attention. I don't need to stand up. You're making viral videos. He's doing it to pick up the chicks that don't need attention. I don't need to stand up. Right. You're making viral videos. Right. He's doing it to pick up the chicks that don't drink. He's about to fall forward.
Starting point is 01:05:10 Yeah. It's all he's doing. He doesn't. He's about to fall forward. I want to be known for my heart. He looks like he's Stephen Chay with the pads. He doesn't move his arms. It's high praise.
Starting point is 01:05:21 What we have comes and goes, and we can't take any of it with us. It's like he's reading off of a teleprompter. I think he probably is. It'd be really funny if he was like, they're like, cut, and he's like, all right, who's got my vape? Yeah. I don't like that.
Starting point is 01:05:37 What do you have come and goes? And he's just like wearing alt designer. It's insane. That's like a whole genre of the internet right now. Of people being like, I'm not like this generation. Why? Why are you not? Yeah, you are.
Starting point is 01:05:52 You are in this generation. That's literally what the generation does. Yeah, exactly. You're like all of them. What generation was he? Millennial? I don't know. I can't tell what age people are. People don't realize millennials are old now.
Starting point is 01:06:09 Yeah. Millennials are what? 28 to 42? Millennial? I'm a millennial. Millennial. Okay. I'm an elder millennial.
Starting point is 01:06:15 I think it might be a little bit... He's 27 and... I think millennials are like 30 to 40 right now. But everyone's always like, blame millennials. Like, dude, we're old. We're not kids. The generation thing, it pisses me off so much. Yeah, 81 to 96.
Starting point is 01:06:29 So the youngest millennial right now is 27 years old. Jesus. So, Sass, you're what? Gen Z. Okay. But it's every, I don't understand how people don't see the pattern. What are you, Bray? Every time.
Starting point is 01:06:43 Gen X. That's right. Every group of people who are young, everyone's like, they're the worst generation we've ever had. It's a constant. No, and the worst generation we ever had was baby boomers. Yeah, I feel like there's a general consensus that they're the worst. And everyone's like, I'm not like this generation. I don't cheat.
Starting point is 01:07:00 It's like, dude, look at the other generation. The other generations were doing things way worse than that. Have you ever heard of slavery? Yeah. They's like, dude, look at the other generation. Like, the other generations were doing things way worse than that. Have you ever heard of slavery? Yeah. They're like, this is the worst generation. No, but it's like, how stupid can you be? Kids now will drop out of college and think they deserve six figures with their first fucking job.
Starting point is 01:07:19 Yeah. Living in camper vans. No, it is funny, though, Sass, what you're saying. It's just so stupid. When people are like, oh, man, I wish it was, like, Sass, what you're saying. It's just so stupid. When people are like, oh man, I wish it was like back in the 40s. Yeah. It's like, what, when people died when they were 60? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:07:30 People post videos of those colorized videos of people walking around New York and they're like, look at everyone's so classy. I'm like, dude, most of those people were probably really bad people. And also they smell like shit. And if you see that guy in the front, if he sprains his ankle, they're going to chop his leg off. Yes, exactly. You've seen the pictures of the beach
Starting point is 01:07:48 where it's like everybody's in shape. Yeah. And they probably couldn't afford to eat. Hungry. Yes, exactly. It's also like you go to the beach these days and you see shockingly, I see tons of good dude bodies.
Starting point is 01:08:02 I'm like, where are these guys keeping their good-ass bodies all fucking year? Under black shirts. I feel like I don't of good dude bodies. I'm like, where are these guys keeping their good-ass bodies all fucking year? Under black shirts. I feel like I don't see these delicious bodies when I'm fucking just walking around on dudes. Gen Z is lifting like crazy. They take over the gyms in groups of five. I don't think Gen Z is doing anything different than any other generation has done. I agree.
Starting point is 01:08:22 It's not like a symptom of the generation. It's a symptom of the technology that's available to them. Social media is the difference. Yes, yeah. But social media has been around for so long. People who are like, I read books. I used to always go play outside. Well, if you had the option to fucking scroll TikTok, you would have
Starting point is 01:08:39 done that shit. Social media has been around for a long time, but Gen Z is the first generation that grew up with it. That's, I think, the difference. Everyone is on social media. Now, but I didn't have Facebook until college. Yeah, even like 10 years ago,
Starting point is 01:08:55 we didn't know what people in other cities or states were doing. Yeah. I didn't have a cell phone until I was 18. Yeah. When did you get your
Starting point is 01:09:04 first cell phone, Tess? When you were four watching March of the Penguins? No, I had like a flip phone. You were on UGIS when you were six? I didn't get an iPhone until I was in ninth grade. When was the first time you went to UGIS? A lot of these porn addicts are just kids who were showed porn by their older brothers at age seven. Oh.
Starting point is 01:09:23 That is actually, I believe porn's totally fine. Not good for kids. We'll fuck up a kid's brain. I watched porn for the first time when I was in second grade. I didn't watch porn. There was no porn. What the fuck were you doing?
Starting point is 01:09:38 I wasn't masturbating. I saw porn for the first time. Pre or post Holy Communion? I don't know. i don't remember uh was it dvd or internet internet my first was dvd god damn that's the horniest way to watch porn yeah go to the dvd store fucking set it down in a tray wasn't radio that late night sex show on elilah no it was like y100 or q102 or something. After like 11 o'clock, this show would come on where it was like, remember that Sue lady where people would call in with their sex? She was an old, old woman, right?
Starting point is 01:10:12 Old, old woman. But it was like that. But they would answer like all this crazy like sex questions. That's where I learned you could put a fist in somebody. And I was. I remember I like couldn't wait to get to the school bus the next day. I was like, they are not going to believe. to the school bus the next day I was like they are not gonna believe this info I have
Starting point is 01:10:27 I gotta fist it no just to like who's got a fist like my friends are not gonna fucking believe what I've just learned like oh my god yeah
Starting point is 01:10:38 school bus the school bus scuttlebutt is where it was at in the back of the bus but you see my first porn was just like this. There was this website called Free Ones that was just click on a woman and you just could see pictures.
Starting point is 01:10:52 Yeah. There was no movement. Was it you that did the puzzle? Yeah, it was the bubble. It was the brick breaker and there was a naked woman. Oh, yeah. And so I'm trying to beat the game and my dick. I tried to find Naked Photo Hunt for the Chicago office.
Starting point is 01:11:07 Oh, yeah. I'd buy a machine if someone has one. Somebody has to have one. That'd probably go well. In the 90s, my dad programmed a strip poker CD, like PC game on CD. What? This is why he's a winner. That is a cool, that's game on CD. What? This is why he's a winner. That is a cool,
Starting point is 01:11:26 that's a W move. It's like, it's basically like a picture of a woman and you play poker against her and if you beat her, like, in poker.
Starting point is 01:11:33 He made this for himself? He was like, on the team that programmed it. Like, it's like, it's on a CD. Like, they,
Starting point is 01:11:38 I guess sold it, but if you win in poker, like a piece of her clothing comes off. Is it like a cartoon woman or like a real woman? It's like a, it's kind of like Mortal off. Is it like a cartoon woman or like a real woman? It's kind of like Mortal Kombat 1 where it looks like a real person but kind of pixelated. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:50 And like every round you drop a piece of her clothes. He probably thought that he was going to play through college with that. I don't know. I don't know. Tim Hitchens had that fucking. I was like, damn, I got sick. Yeah, he's got that T in him. Gun to your head and he says you got to come fast as hell.
Starting point is 01:12:04 Would you choose screen? Out of my head, and he says you've got to come fast as hell. Would you choose screen? Out of my head, I'm busting a medium. A random screen cap of a porn video or the whole audio? What do you mean? Would you have to come faster? Screen cap, screen cap. Random screen cap? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:12:18 Nah, give me audio. Yeah, audio, definitely. Audio? Yeah. Just of people breathing heavy? Yeah, yeah. Oh, man. Audio? Yeah. Just of people breathing heavy? Yeah. Oh, man. Was that you breathing?
Starting point is 01:12:28 It sounded like a porno, man. Kinda. My boxers are fucking destroyed. Let me help you, bro. Let me get in there. Are you coming? Hold on, Kyle. Open up a porno and go to a random screen cap.
Starting point is 01:12:41 I want to... Someone else has to. Oh, yeah, you can't look. I can't either. Why? I'm on his protocol. He's on the protocol. Oh, yeah, you can't look. I can't either. Why? I'm on his protocol. He's on the protocol. We're all...
Starting point is 01:12:48 I'll do it. My man. You actually want me to do it? Sign everybody a random screen cap. Put that video, TJ. Well, I'm not going to do this. Well, now it's on my phone. Magic Johnson.
Starting point is 01:13:02 What has he done? Well, he's a business person He's got AIDS That's all he's done That's his claim to fame It's like dude's a fucking Billionaire businessman on top of A hall of Fame basketball career.
Starting point is 01:13:26 Is he dead? Is that guy dead? Sterling? Alan Sterling? He's got to be. I don't think so. I think we would have heard about it. Who's that?
Starting point is 01:13:35 Alan Sterling. He's dead. Oh, he is? When did he die? Like 10 years ago. No. He's dead. He's dead.
Starting point is 01:13:40 Not 10 years ago. He died pretty soon after the whole Clippers thing. Yeah, he's dead. What? Did he have kin? Yeah. Did you let your kids be friends with him? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:50 He's alive. Oh! Oh, my God. Oh, he's a Taurus. You said he was dead 10 years ago. His wife is alive. I thought he was. Years don't matter.
Starting point is 01:14:00 He looked 89 in that video from. No, he's. It'll be a big deal. I thought he died shortly after. Oh. It will be a big deal. I thought he died shortly after. Oh, it'll be a big deal when he dies. You think it'll be a big deal? You think he's front page news?
Starting point is 01:14:14 It depends what city. Yeah. I think ESPN. Yes. Front page news in LA. Yeah. Okay. ESPN.
Starting point is 01:14:19 Yes. Huh? I think you'll see it on the bottom line. I don't think they'll stop sports center or anything. No, but ESPN, I'm saying the website, will have him front page dead for an hour and a half. I don't think so. I don't think he'll be the lead story on the website. Okay. What are we going to bet?
Starting point is 01:14:38 This shit could happen today. What do you want to bet? Moving. Let's put 1,000 bucks. 1,000 points. 1,000 points. Whoever loses has to tweet out a rest in peace Donald Sterling graphic. No, no, no.
Starting point is 01:14:56 1,000 points. I like that. Yes. I don't know. R.I.P. It just says R.I.P, I don't know. R.I.P. What is it that says R.I.P. and then his dates? It'll be like the black and white one that we tweet out. With the caption, R.I.P. one of the goats.
Starting point is 01:15:13 Oh. Yeah. That's a good bet. And everyone's going to know that it's a joke. No. Because he's going to die in like five years. Yeah, but it'll be funny. I think you've got to be like pretty broad with it. You've just got to be like one of those ones die in like five years. Yeah, but it'll be funny. You've got to be pretty broad with it.
Starting point is 01:15:26 You've just got to be one of those ones that make you say, wow. Or maybe just like a holy... I saw it on the TV screen. I couldn't believe it. I'm not doing that. One of those ones that make you say, wow. Yeah, with the graphic. With the graphic. Black and white graphic. And a thousand points.
Starting point is 01:15:42 Yes, that's hilarious. That's so funny, Brandon. You got your back. Also, there's a lot of us talking about this bet now. It's not going to be like you're at the top. Can I just talk, Kyle? You've been saying you have my back, you have my back. You're not actually doing anything.
Starting point is 01:15:54 In the event that you need someone to have your back, which you haven't had yet. But you had that option the whole time. I don't like this leaning in. You're going to lose him. You're going to fight me out. Yeah, you're going to lose him. You're going to fight me out. Pets off the table. No, no, no. I'm just asking myself, I trust KB
Starting point is 01:16:12 more than anyone in the world. I just feel like KB's setting me up. That's all. You want to do the bet? You want to do the bet flipped? I'll take the other side. What was the other side? He won't be on the ESPN yeah
Starting point is 01:16:27 Evan just gained a crazy mother we're just like who's somebody that's like universally good that's dead say hi to Mother Teresa
Starting point is 01:16:38 yeah Evan's not ready for stir yeah like who is like a group of people like toes are gonna get
Starting point is 01:16:44 sucked up in heaven. Who's someone that everyone loves that died? Mr. Rogers. Andrew Johnson. I'll be like, I know him. I know him. Oh, if he died. Okay.
Starting point is 01:16:54 I know him and magic are just shooting the shit in heaven. Or you're just like, I know he's looking down on me right now. Yeah, yeah. Like one of those graphics where they're all like sitting around a poker table together. John Madden, Mother Teresa Donald Sterling. Harambe.
Starting point is 01:17:13 Harambe. To be a fly on the wall. Have you ever seen the people who make like fan edits of the conversations they have? Dude, have you ever seen the Instagram DM one? No.
Starting point is 01:17:23 Dude, that DM, like fake DM'd all of the like it's like they're on their instagram oh yes yes i was just getting started oh it was like pop smoke yeah oh that is awful jake and i know you've seen oh my god that's real you pull that up that one's one of the worst ever that one got a lot of traction people are furious about that they used to do the ones where like the quarterbacks remember bleach report had a run with those like quarterbacks texting each other in like dead quarterbacks no live ones oh and like like tom brady being like see you guys in the like like have fun in the regular season seeing the Super Bowl and Eli Manning being like better hope you don't see me
Starting point is 01:18:06 yeah yeah I feel like whoever was making that was on the verge of coming the entire time that's like that has to come from a horny place to be that devoted to making that whole graphic Stephen Chay is ready to speak
Starting point is 01:18:21 he loves those did you guys see the trailer for the Netflix docuseries Quarterback? It looks awesome. It looks sick. But you loved those fake conversations between quarterbacks. Nah. Really? Nah.
Starting point is 01:18:37 Because you knew they were a joke. So it's like, eh, it was low-hanging fruit. What's the premise of the quarterback documentary? It's like Drive to Survive or the golf one. But it's Mike Holmes, Mariota, and who? And Kirk Cousins. Kirk Cousins. It's actually kind of like a perfect three.
Starting point is 01:18:53 Yes. Big Cat, would you let someone start a documentary on you? You wouldn't? I don't think it would be interesting. Like a good team of guys? Yeah. What kind of documentary? This would be like very like...
Starting point is 01:19:05 I don't know. No. You're pretty young. Also, it would just like... What? I feel like you're kind of young to have a documentary. Billie Eilish has a documentary. I guess you like...
Starting point is 01:19:16 Can I go to work? Nothing to do with age. It's fame. It's also like, why would you want to do a documentary when I'm like... The longer you wait, the better it'll be. People see me for like 20 hours a week anyway. You don't need more of me. You need less of me.
Starting point is 01:19:29 I bet there's a lot of people that would really enjoy that. You need less of me. I'm going to go take a nap. I mean, you guys kind of did that during COVID, right? With the barstool. Dana Beers was doing it. I think we are doing a little like PMT moving thing. But I wasn't... The Dana BeersT moving thing, but I wasn't.
Starting point is 01:19:45 The Dana Beers one was good. Yeah. It wasn't my idea. Yeah, it was. Fasoli tell you what he told sales to do for us, Kyle? No. He wants to film us moving on VHS. That's actually kind of cool.
Starting point is 01:20:01 Moving to Chicago. Like 90s style? Yeah. I actually kind of like that to Chicago Yeah Like 90s style Yeah I actually kind of like that Yeah You got a big VHS camcorder Shout out Fasoli Zav
Starting point is 01:20:11 Somebody sent me this today There he is A shirt Yeah Great shirt Chance I'm wearing that Huh By the way
Starting point is 01:20:20 Speaking of shirts Store.barstoolsports.com July 4th merch In the store By the way, speaking of shirts, store.barstoolsports.com. July 4th merch in the store. store.barstoolsports.com. Go check it out today. They got all the new 4th of July merch ready to go. Yak Dream Team.
Starting point is 01:20:40 New hats. New foreplay stuff. New PMT stuff. Son of Boy Dad, you guys got some 4th of July merch? No. New anus shirt. Untel this story, bitch. They didn't put that in the 4th of July collection.
Starting point is 01:20:52 Oh. But you could buy it for 4th of July. When you're in the store, you can still get that shirt. I don't think there's any red, white, or blue on it. Hell. Sick. East Coast Summer. Ilf. East Coast Summer.
Starting point is 01:21:03 Untel this bitch. Oh, yeah. That actually, those both go off the store at midnight. I need a M Coast Summer. Until this bitch. Oh, yeah. That actually, those both go off the store at midnight. I need a Mook shirt. Shout out, Mook. Some housekeeping stuff. I have shirts for everyone. If we could wear those tomorrow, I'll give them to you after the show.
Starting point is 01:21:15 They're on my desk. Sure. Other housekeeping stuff. Should we talk about next case read? No. Sorry about that off air. Okay. I have housekeeping about that off air. Okay. I have housekeeping too.
Starting point is 01:21:28 Oh. Housekeeping. I was talking to Michelangelo today because he did a, he filmed a- Why'd you just knock? Housekeeping. Oh, I thought it was,
Starting point is 01:21:36 every time you say Michelangelo, you knock. Yeah. Like you saved his soul. He went to Oregon with Dougs to film the Roofball World Championship earlier this year and that's about to come out. He said he could put me in contact with the inventor of roofball to call into the show and give us some pointers.
Starting point is 01:21:54 I like that. Potentially sanction it as an official roofball event. I like it. I'll be out on Tuesday next week. Here, otherwise. I'll be out on Thursday. Where are you going? Why? going to nashville on tuesday for what i'm going to nashville on friday i'd end you oh really have like eight interviews
Starting point is 01:22:15 in like two hours i don't know how we're gonna do it all tight ends awesome a quarterback A quarterback. Ay-yi-yi. Ay caramba. Quarterback. I'll actually be out all week. I'm going to buy my house. Nashville? Chicago. Nashville Bar's opening next weekend. Yes, that's why I'm going out there.
Starting point is 01:22:39 Bringing in you and Che? Yeah. Fuck yes. That was such a ricochet shot that Max took when Dave was. Oh, that was brutal. That was such a ricochet shot that Max took when Dave was. Oh, that was brutal. That was brutal. His spit and chickles was like live from Florida. And it was like everyone who they're like, I know all those dudes. They're fucking great.
Starting point is 01:22:55 But it was everyone but Whitney and Biz. And Dave was like, oh, bringing out the A-team. And then Dave tweeted out a picture like, come meet the Pardon My Take crew. And it was just Max and his solo. Yeah, look at this. Come meet with Pardon My Take crew. That's hilarious. That's so funny. It's a brutal
Starting point is 01:23:14 Rick Shay shot. That's so funny. That's hilarious. You should do a Max meetup That's so good Solo Max Like a Max shirt The way that they have a Mook shirt
Starting point is 01:23:30 He's a meme You wanna spin the wheel TJ? Keep yakking but spin it I got a big interview coming up Today? Yeah Maybe we should get your brain sharp somehow. Ooh.
Starting point is 01:23:46 Yeah. Sporkle? Wow. Is there anyone you still get nervous for, or that you'd be nervous for, or not really anymore? This one I'm a little nervous because we've said some things. Oh. You got OJ.
Starting point is 01:24:02 Got OJ. Would you be nervous for OJ? Dude, we got pitched OJ. What? That'd be awesome. We got pitched OJ Got OJ Would you be nervous for OJ? Dude we got pitched OJ What? OJ would be awesome We got pitched OJ This was like 2017
Starting point is 01:24:11 By his people Or by Barstool I think it was a salesperson Was like Hey so OJ's about to get out of jail And we want Part of my take to interview him
Starting point is 01:24:20 On the van ride Out of jail Good god How did he do that? I don't think so. Would he want to do a- Well, I think it was just for- He was just going to get paid.
Starting point is 01:24:34 Oh, yeah. We're like, yeah. I think we'll pass. I think let's just see him get out of jail. The first people he sees get out of prison? Yeah, like let's just- Get out of prison? Let's just see if he doesn't commit any crimes for a little bit. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:46 I have a great sparkle quiz if we ever get to it. Okay. Yeah. Let's play the great sparkle quiz. Now we're going to get wet first. People made a bunch of random grab bags for us. Oh my God. About us or for us. Oh, we got what?
Starting point is 01:25:02 How many times are we going to do this in a row? I know. I know. You have to obey. Oh, man. Wheel reset's coming. I would actually love one. There's tea tree. Is that bad for...
Starting point is 01:25:15 Those are good. What if Jay goes back-to-back wet? He would never do that. I have a call in four minutes I have to go to, but I will get wet if I need to. Yeah, of course you will. I wanted to make an announcement. I made my first in four minutes I have to go to, but I will get wet if I need to. I wanted to make an announcement. I made my first baseball pick today. I'm calling it a double play.
Starting point is 01:25:34 It's going to be... That's the name of Brandon's podcast. Not for long. Former. It's going to be guys that be over one and a half bases. The first game is in a little over an hour. I don't know. I'm not going to watch these games.
Starting point is 01:25:48 Full transparency. Lourdes Gurriel Jr. You're going to watch. You're close to his name. No idea what his name is. Don't really care, honestly. You're really selling this. Yeah, why wouldn't you watch?
Starting point is 01:26:00 And you should say that you care. One of the games is very late. I do care. I'm actually trying this. I was talking with Hubs and Climber a lot. Freddie Freeman. I know that guy. I think he won an MVP. He did. Yeah. Good player.
Starting point is 01:26:12 But he's playing at 10 o'clock tonight. But yeah, it should be fun. I'll do these once in a while. I'm just dipping my toe in the water. I like it, Che. I like it. You just cursed yourself with that line. Oh! Alright. I feel like it's You just cursed yourself with that line. Oh. All right.
Starting point is 01:26:27 All right, spin it, spin it. I feel like it's going to be me today because I have this big interview. Yeah, that's always how it is. You're nervous for. TJ, yes, TJ. Congratulations, brother. Per Yax, that's an info. I've been three of the last five lets.
Starting point is 01:26:40 Wow. Oh. That's terrible luck. Yeah, that is. 60%. Damn. I think I would quit, that is. 60%. Damn. I think I would quit the show if that happened to me. I'll quit the show if it happens to me today.
Starting point is 01:26:52 KB. He's ready. Happy for you, brother. I'm happy for you, brother. None of us are happy for anybody. Well done, KB. He doesn't deserve it. Even though I'd love to see him fucking soaked.
Starting point is 01:27:02 Kate. Way to go, Kate. That's huge. This never happens for me. Those white shorts, fucking soaked. Kate, way to go, Kate. That's huge. This never happens for me. Those white shorts, KB. Oh, my God. So juicy. Oh, man.
Starting point is 01:27:14 Oh, Zah. I'm happy for Zah. What's KB doing? I'm happy for Zah. Is he going to get wet? Is he just doing it? Wait. No.
Starting point is 01:27:22 He just sprinted to the bathroom. He sprinted to the shower bathroom? All right, Brandon. Yeah, Brandon. Congrats, my boy. Damn it. Congrats, Brando. MSU Brando.
Starting point is 01:27:41 Big cat. There you go. There you go, big cat. Huge. I'm fucked. Huge. Yes Cat. There you go. There you go, Big Cat. Huge. I'm fucked. Huge. Chews off Nick. You ever just stop to ask why we're doing this?
Starting point is 01:27:53 Just an untie. All right, Sassy. Yes! Yes, Sass! It's coming off. Yeah! I rode the train home with Che last night, and he still was wet. Like, he was still in bad shape.
Starting point is 01:28:08 Unreal. Nick! Let's go, Nicky! I know! Come on, Rone! Come on, Rone! Way to be Nick! Come on, horse!
Starting point is 01:28:17 Come on! It might be Che again. Yeah! Yeah! Let's go, Rone. We're all rooting for you, Rone. No, no, no. No, we are. We're all rooting for you, Roan. No, no, no. No, we are.
Starting point is 01:28:26 We are. This is so bad. Let's root for each other, bro. There you go. Come on, Che. That's a win for Roan. Whatever, you fight back. That was you.
Starting point is 01:28:41 You came back at the bottom of the ninth there. No, wait. Che's going to give up. Che's not giving up. There you go, Che. 1-1, 1-1, 1-1, 1-1. May the best man win, brother. Way to go.
Starting point is 01:28:51 No matter what happens, I love you with my whole heart. Love you too, buddy. Oh, no. All right, 2-1 Roan. Oh, shit. I'm taking a cold one if I get it. Let the body naturally warm itself back up. Is that what they say?
Starting point is 01:29:14 Is that the whole thing? 3-1. 3-1 Roan. God damn, this is crazy. I feel bad. I don't. I don't. I'll probably wind up losing this.
Starting point is 01:29:24 It's still boofable for me. Why do you guys feel bad? It's cheating. There you go, Che. Hey, good count. Come on back. Three, two. Come back would be crazy.
Starting point is 01:29:34 Let us down, Ro. Che, my boy. Don't let us down, Ro. Che, my legend. Yeah! Oh, no. Oh, my God. Four of the last six.
Starting point is 01:29:46 66% wet. Hell, yeah. That sucks. If you get the next one, if you get three in a row, something good should happen. Yeah. Like, we should have to. I'm pretty sure I am three in a row. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:29:59 Oh, so four in a row. Yeah, yeah. See you, Che. It's fine. I got another call. What are the odds of that? They're so low right now. This might just be Slush Fund finally coming to roost.
Starting point is 01:30:14 Yeah, I mean, we did give him $12,000. $12,000? Yeah. Shoots me up in the middle of the night sometimes. I'm like, sass, staying up till 5 a.m. What the fuck did we do? I don't know how we all agreed to give him $12,000. It was maybe the heist of the century sometimes. I'm like, sass staying up until 5 a.m. What the fuck did we do? I don't know how we all agreed
Starting point is 01:30:26 to give him $12,000. It was maybe the heist of the century. It's easy too. We thought first we were betting on it going against him and losing.
Starting point is 01:30:34 That's why I'll never feel bad. And it's also Che. There's no one who's better equipped to like take a little bit of adversity in his day than Che.
Starting point is 01:30:44 Totally. At any point in his life. He won't even, when his wife's like, how was your day? This won't even register. No. It was a great day. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:30:53 Yeah. He's like a puppy. That's people who are sitting on the train. He's like, I can't. My pants are too wet. So he had to stand the whole. Should have dipped himself outside and blow dried himself. So let's go with these sporkles.
Starting point is 01:31:07 I gotta do one real quick, so I gotta go. Pick between two. Sporkle Scattergories and Former Advertising Slogans. I like both. Scattergories. And was that Grab Bag for the Yak, TJ? Yeah, somebody made us a bunch.
Starting point is 01:31:24 We're gonna do Scattergories. Easy, easy. Oh, wait. Grab Bag for the Yak, TJ? Yeah, somebody made us a bunch. Oh, no, no. No, we're going to do Scattergories. Easy, easy. Oh, wait, Grab Bag for the Yak? Somebody made us a bunch of Grab Bags. Can we just take a look? Because that's a solid move by that person. Oh, four. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 01:31:36 Can we do this real quick? Yeah, this is good. Oh, that's actually for us. Yeah, these are great. This is literally for us. Wait, what's the guy's name? Reddit user, u slash sensitive underscore use 5288. All right, this is great.
Starting point is 01:31:48 Big shout out to SensitiveU. All right, Sass. We'll do categories after this. Let's go on Sass. Reddit user. Sass, can you please swap me, man? That was urgent. Okay, KB, start us off.
Starting point is 01:32:05 Say the answer that you're giving to. Should we read them through for the listener? Three gifts given to baby Jesus, gold. Okay, so the categories are one four-term president of the United States, two founding members of the NFL still active, three gifts given to baby Jesus, four suits in a deck. Five NYC mafia families.
Starting point is 01:32:28 Six trigonometric functions. Seven films that grossed over $2 billion. That's great. Eight players that won MVP three plus times. Nine countries that have nuclear weapons. Ten wars against foreign countries, no civil slash Indian. This is great. This is great. If you want a job at Barstool, just make a
Starting point is 01:32:48 billion of these. Can you guys not play the next one? Can you play Scattergores? We'll just say the other one for tomorrow. But hopefully people will make more of these, knowing that we like these numbered things. Shout out this guy. Alright, go ahead, Ron. You're up. Roosevelt. Oh, here comes Che. He's not looking.
Starting point is 01:33:04 He's very wet. His hair's still spiky. Alright, Roosevelt. Oh, it's soaked. Oh, he's not looking. He's very wet. His hair's still spiky. All right, Roosevelt. Oh, it's soaked, his hair. Oh, sass. That's the wettest he's been. Yeah, this is very wet. Was that your same wet outfit as yesterday?
Starting point is 01:33:16 Or did you just put wet clothes back on? Yeah, so I actually air dried this shirt. It's my desk. Store it at barcelsports.com, 4th of July collection. There you go. You make your body look great, bro. I look great. All right, have fun in your meeting full links. My desk. Store it at barcelsports.com. Fourth of July collection. There you go. Make your body look great, bro. Look great. All right.
Starting point is 01:33:27 Have fun in your meeting, Che. Thank you. Perfect. All right, Sass. That was worth it. That was worth it. All right, Sass. Here we go.
Starting point is 01:33:38 I will go with nine countries that have nuclear weapons. North Korea. Nice. Sass, you demon. Let's go two founding members of the NFL still active Bears. Larry Bird won the MVP three straight
Starting point is 01:33:55 seasons. Doesn't have to be three straight. Just three times. I understand. I was telling you what it was. I was telling you what it was. Zara, are you typing? Yep. Give me frankincense. You asshole. What the fuck is frankincense?
Starting point is 01:34:10 I think it's SC. One of the gifts that Jesus got. Got it. I'll go with myrrh while we're at it. This is a little bit of myrrh. Four impractical jokers. Somebody needs to make a Sporkle quiz where they're the same word as every category. I think it's M-U-R-R-H.
Starting point is 01:34:26 Oh, it's M-Y-R-R. Man. M-Y-R-R. It's two, yeah. Okay. Four suits in a deck. Hearts. Clubs.
Starting point is 01:34:40 Pass? We're not going to do a run on the deck? No. Okay. 10 U.S. wars against foreign countries. I will go with Vietnam. Ooh, spades. Michael Jordan.
Starting point is 01:35:02 Really, really strong, Brandon. Thanks. Really, really strong, Brandon. Thanks. Diamond. Nice. S. Diamonds. There we go.
Starting point is 01:35:20 Banana. Ooh. A crime family. A crime family. You're not going to do shit. Yeah. You know how going to do shit. Yeah. You know how to spell it? No. It is correct.
Starting point is 01:35:34 Oh. All right. KB? USA. Okay. Korea. Korean War. Russia. Russia Russia The Cold War
Starting point is 01:35:49 Iran Iran Iran I don't know Oh Just think they have them So did George Bush Man
Starting point is 01:36:04 First out I have a lot that I. They did, too. So did George Bush. Damn, Big Cat, first out. First out. Avatar. I have a lot that I know. Why did I do that? That's good, because I'm running thin. Avatar. Neat.
Starting point is 01:36:12 What the hell is this? What's the meaning of this? Oh, don't give me answers. I don't want to know. What? No, stop. I don't want to know. No, Sass.
Starting point is 01:36:22 No, don't listen to him. What are we doing? What are you doing? I'm just sitting here. What the fuck? Fine. Wait a minute. Is my mic on?
Starting point is 01:36:30 Yeah. Feels weird. Are you observing? Yeah, I'm just sitting here. Are you taking Che's spot? What are you guys doing? Where's Che? That's a good question.
Starting point is 01:36:38 Where is Che? He had to go get wet. Now he's got a meeting. Oh, man. Bye, Pete. Bye, meeting. Oh, man. Bye, Pete. Bye, Pete. Oh, no. Oh, no.
Starting point is 01:36:51 He's having a ton of fun. Yeah, why is he enjoying this? He's having a ton of fun. For Pete. Yeah. He deserves this. He had a real smile on his face when they went around the corner. He's happy.
Starting point is 01:37:08 What's going on? Something's getting into Pete. They released Plaid 2. Nick, you're up. Oh, I'm up? I don't know if this is going to be Avengers Endgame. Yeah, that should work. Luke Chase.
Starting point is 01:37:31 I think it's L-U-C-C-E-S-E or something. Luke Casey, Luke Chase. You don't think there's an H in there? I don't know how you spell that. I could be wrong, too. It's my usual. Definitely not two S's. That would make it French.
Starting point is 01:37:49 I feel like you can look it up. I'm just going to Google that and nothing else. There it is. L-U-C-C-H-E-S-E. Okay. No swag? China. China. No swag? China. China.
Starting point is 01:38:08 You're getting damn good sass. Gambino. Bastard. Did you know that? How Big Head wanted me to say it? I'm going to go with the Cold War. I don't think that's going to count. I don't think that's going to count. I don't think that was a real war.
Starting point is 01:38:27 Why does that not make sense? It's not an actual war. We didn't actually... It wasn't... But it was a war. No, it's not a war. No, it wasn't. It's not a war.
Starting point is 01:38:34 No bullets were fired. It was a mental war. No. Why does that not count? Because it's not a war. It wasn't a war. No one fought it. You're out.
Starting point is 01:38:41 India. Wasn't it like a war of technology and shit? What the fuck is that? That's like the war on drugs. Israel. You guys don't know shit about the Cold War. Tim Moore's World War II. Hacky.
Starting point is 01:39:01 It's a hack. No. Oh, sorry. Yeah. That's why hack. No. Oh, sorry. Yeah. Oh, that's why number one came up. Well, I probably answered it before. He was trying to type I-I. Potato potato.
Starting point is 01:39:13 Yeah. Iraqi war. What they called it? This is ridiculous. All right. World War II. Probably going to get ten answers with that one. Pakistan.
Starting point is 01:39:29 Pakistan. Give me Avengers Infinity War. I don't know if it's right. It is. I could be wrong. South Korea. Watch this. A little dicey for them if they don't have it. They look like they do.
Starting point is 01:39:54 That's embarrassing. I would have guessed they did, too. Right? Right. You would think. Quite the pickle. I'm a bitch. Dumb piece of shit.
Starting point is 01:40:06 Cosine. Sine. You already got it in there. S-I-N-E. Okay. Okay. Magic Johnson. Tan?
Starting point is 01:40:31 Tangent? Is that a trigonometry? T-A-N? Magic's in there. You made it. It's you because I... Oh, you're out? Yeah. I bet you they got him NBA MVP
Starting point is 01:40:48 Oh Bill Russell Sorry what'd you say? Bill Russell Uh Genovese Genovese I think it's an O right there Yeah Genovese. Genovese. Genovese.
Starting point is 01:41:09 It's an O right there, yeah. Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. I should have used that one. Fuck. You didn't know the Genovese crime family? You got it. You don't know what the fuck I know, Rowan. Uh, has LeBron done it? You knew LeBron had done it. I didn't.
Starting point is 01:41:34 I assumed. Kyle? Um... Just Dark Knight. See ya. Damn. The Revolutionary War. I had that one.
Starting point is 01:42:02 I was going to say that. I was going to pull a Brandon and say it when I wasn't in. So I want people to know that I knew another war. I believe the War of 1812. Sorry, bro. Is that wrong? No, it's... I was fucking with you, man. Just pulling your fucking cock. Shit. Give me
Starting point is 01:42:23 England for nukes. That a boy, Nikki. England? UK. Oh yeah, they got a whole bunch. These in alphabetical order? Where are they keeping them? Some of them aren't. Oh, what isn't? You're out, aren't you? I'm out.
Starting point is 01:42:42 Oh, you're out? Yeah, he's out. He's out? Can I see Wilt Chamberlain? Good one, Ron. Smart one. That's a smart answer. And you got another war.
Starting point is 01:43:02 Well, if I did, I would say it. Movies. I think... Iron Man. Oh, Brandon. That's wrong. Come on now. All right, this might be a win for Roan here.
Starting point is 01:43:23 See, I have answers now, and it just doesn't matter. Go ahead and give me Star Wars The Force Awakens. Nikki. Nikki. I don't know. I think it is. I don't think it is. I've already taken.
Starting point is 01:43:37 Oh. Oh, Nikki. You always believed. I'm just the alphabet. No, I'm always in your corner. That'll be one or the other. God damn. Nicky, Nicky, Nicky.
Starting point is 01:43:48 Who's that fucking NBA player? Did you go? No. That one? Not really. How about the Spanish-American one? That's the one. Yeah, that's the one.
Starting point is 01:43:59 And the boy, Rona. Same amount of encouragement. Same exact amount of encouragement Same exact amount of encouragement What's the last fucking Star Wars The Rise of Skywalker Is that what it was Star Wars the I know a couple but I know some spin offs
Starting point is 01:44:24 But I don't think those were two billion. The last one had to have been, right? All I know is The Force Awakens. I don't know if there's, is there one after The Force Awakens? I already said my answer. There's two after. I don't want to cheat, but yeah. Is it called The Rise of Skywalker, TJ?
Starting point is 01:44:37 I'm thinking of a different one. Oh, okay. I don't know Star Wars. Yeah, then I guess I'm going to forfeit here, because I don't think that's what it's called. He could at least try it. What do you mean? Star Wars, was it Then I guess I'm going to forfeit here because I don't think that's what it's called. Well, he could at least try it. What do you mean? Star Wars, was it called The Rise of Skywalker?
Starting point is 01:44:48 Rise of Skywalker. Come on, Nicky. This is correct, right? I don't think that's what it was called. Star Wars, The Rise of Skywalker. Yeah. Well, you still, Roan still has to get one right. No, we started going this way.
Starting point is 01:45:06 Right. Well, should I try another one? Fuck it then, Roan. Show off. I don't know. I don't know anymore. I'm going to go. How about the war on drugs?
Starting point is 01:45:14 Let's see if it pops up. What is the war that's sitting in that spot right there? Persian Gulf? That was the war. Gulf, right? Wait, what is the country between C and I? Is it Germany or Egypt? Is the U.S. involved in the Korean War now?
Starting point is 01:45:26 Yes. In the Korean War, yes. Is it Tim Duncan? Ooh. I don't know who that is. I don't know who the other one is. Is he a worthy or an old dude? What about Titanic?
Starting point is 01:45:38 It's Black Panther is the one that I know. Is it Avatar 2? Titanic, nice, okay. What movie did I say? The Rise of Skywalker? Yeah. That one already made that much money?
Starting point is 01:45:52 Avatar 2, I guess, makes sense. It was highly anticipated. No. Fuck. Is it like Indiana Jones
Starting point is 01:46:00 or some shit? I can see that. I had a new one, like a Marvel one. It's a Marvel one. Alphabetically, it's probably another Star Wars. Could be another Star Wars, yeah. What was that called? Last Jedi?
Starting point is 01:46:09 Empire Strikes Back? That's too old. Two billion is like... Star Wars Rogue One? What about like a Fast and the Furious movie? What about one of the prequels? Crime Families Columbo. Wait, yeah, what about the one where Paul Walker died?
Starting point is 01:46:21 What was that Fast... What about Rogue One? Fast Seven? Rogue One definitely did not hit two. Who's the basketball player who banged all those ladies? Will Chamberlain. What about Mean, Median, and Mode?
Starting point is 01:46:35 Carl Malone won three. He won two, right? I think Carl Malone won two. Really want to get this movie. What about The Dark Knight Rises? What about The Dark Knight? We did The Dark Knight. Did we do Dark Knight Rises? It didn't make as much as Dark Knight, did it? I mean, the last one
Starting point is 01:46:48 you'd think would make a ton because everybody's going to see. Yeah. Fuck, what is it? Is it animated? Is it Mexican-American War? Is that one? Lion King?
Starting point is 01:46:59 Oh, yeah. Lion King. Yeah, nicely done. Try the Lion King. No Way Home. No Way Home. What are we doing? We're not competing. Toy Story? It was Toy Story. We the Lion King. No way home. No way home. What are we doing? We're not competing.
Starting point is 01:47:07 Toy Story? It was Toy Story. We want to know. Yeah. Oh. All right. William Carter in chat. Can you try mean, median, or mode?
Starting point is 01:47:15 Oh, who is the other NFL team? No, I'm an idiot. Packers? Cardinals? Cardinals, yeah. It's tangent and cotangent, I think, as well. This is a good one. Yeah, it was a great one.
Starting point is 01:47:28 Thank you for making it. Shout out to the fucking guy. I think he made, like, five. Wow. Keep going. Make a million of these. These are fun as fuck. He made six.
Starting point is 01:47:37 Feels good to think. Kind of forget. The Arizona Cardinals was an original team? Yeah, it was Chicago first. Oh, and then it moved to St. Louis. Okay. All right, should we do KB's – what was the one you had? Do you want to do Scattergories?
Starting point is 01:47:55 Scattergories or – Scattergories. Why did you say it like that? He said Scattergories or whatever. I don't care. Whatever. I think it's Scatterg. I don't care. Only scattergories. Or scatter.
Starting point is 01:48:10 Gory scats? Send them the link. Scatter. It's like cattergories. Two's like categories. Two Ts. I don't like this. Try that one. That's a bad sign.
Starting point is 01:48:35 What? Sporkle Scattergories. Oh, no. What's he doing? No profile pic. Not a real name. Okay, so you have to name one of these things starting with the letters. Sporkle.
Starting point is 01:48:49 What? Yes. What? So Oscar Best Picture starting with S-P-O-R-C-L-E. That's great. Elements, Shakespearean women, one-word countries, Pokemon. That's okay. Old Testament.
Starting point is 01:49:03 Woo! Constellations. Emmy. countries, Pokemon, Old Testament, Constellations, Emmy, AFL, NFL merger teams, or Crayola colors. Let's go. Oh, it has to start with that letter? Yeah. Oh, this is really smart.
Starting point is 01:49:16 All right, Kyle. One word country. All right, Roan. All right, Roan. Roan won. I forgot. Sorry. Spain. Panama.
Starting point is 01:49:34 Portugal, I guess. What's going to be small? Yeah. China. China. Oman. Nice. Laman. Nice. Laos.
Starting point is 01:49:46 That's the only one that starts with O? LAOS. Only country, I think. Nick, you brilliant motherfucker. Who's up? Kyle. Russia. Ethiopia.
Starting point is 01:50:01 Damn. All right. Succession. Ethiopia. Damn. Alright. Um, Succession? Good. Lost. Trying to order food here. Um, any best show? Uh, Pikachu.
Starting point is 01:50:22 Pikachu. For Pokemon Gen 1. P-I-K-A-C-H-U. I like the way he spelled it better. Pikachu. Incorrectly? Yeah, that's fine. Yeah. Oh, was it in there?
Starting point is 01:50:42 Sorry, are you waiting on me? Plutonium. Plutonium. Is that an element or is that a combo? Nice. Kate, well done, Kate. Crayola colors, orange. Squirtle. What the fuck are you doing?
Starting point is 01:51:15 Everything, everywhere, all at once. This is fun. I like this. Probably. I didn't win best picture. It's probably made before then. Everything is spelled wrong. Ah, he made it.
Starting point is 01:51:35 Orion's belt. Orion, I guess. O-R-I-O-N. O-R-I-O-N. And then to get rid of belt. Take belt off. Take the belt off. Slowly.
Starting point is 01:51:58 Pink. What was it on there? Oh! That's not Crayola color? Pink isn't? I'm out. Damn. What out damn what i'm gonna say i'm just looking i'm not cheating i'm just looking at perseus constellations what are you looking at my i took a picture of the screen oh i can't see i can't see it doesn't have pink perseus i don't know that's weird pissedissed. I think they call it Flamingo or some shit like that.
Starting point is 01:52:27 Tickle me, Pink. Yeah, some dumb shit. I could be way wrong. Fucking orange. S-E-U-S? E-R-S-E-U-S. It might just not be a constellation. Yeah, you fucked it up, Kate.
Starting point is 01:52:38 Oh. Huh. Exodus. Yeah, Sporkle. All right, your naming. Exodus. Yes. Sporkle. All right, you're naming these things with these letters. Okay. I'm up right.
Starting point is 01:52:53 What's up, Bro? Onyx. Who won the last one? And the Nelly line, I always thought he was talking about slamming Onyx, like the Pokemon, because that's one of his moves. Wait, why is Onix not coming out? Should be. Try IX, but I think...
Starting point is 01:53:11 Oh, and IX. I'm going to... I don't think this is right. I'm going to go with La La Land. That's the one that got the fake out. Yeah, I didn't get it. Fuck. I'm going to go with Chicago.
Starting point is 01:53:26 Oh, is it asking for the nickname or the city? Probably the nickname. Well, that's a movie. Crash. I'm out. No, you're good. Chicago. Chicago was the best picture.
Starting point is 01:53:33 Oh, it's all of them. It's one of them, yeah. Got it, got it. I don't really know if I like that, how they do that. Out, Brandon? The Seahawks. They after that? They were after that that weren't they
Starting point is 01:53:46 fuck i'm gonna be out there's merger teams mean teams that were in one oh brandon's out i'm out okay fucking kyle took exodus next out right yeah oh sorry purple Nick's out, right? Yeah. Oh, sorry. Purple. There we go. Charizard. Did you say peach? You were out and there were Pokemons on the board. I said pink for the Crayola color.
Starting point is 01:54:14 Well, wait. I said purple and it came out peach, didn't it? Well, it's a list if there's dots. Oh, okay. Peach is on there and not pink? What has been guessed for AFL NFL merger? Nothing. Nothing. Oh.
Starting point is 01:54:24 So you still have S-P-O-R-C-L-E. Okay, who's in? Who's up? Kyle. I just went. Roan. Portia. TIA. T-O-R-T-I-A.
Starting point is 01:54:46 Chiefs. Chief Chiefs God damn it Red You're damn good Thanks I know where to stay in my lane Leviticus L-E-V-I P-I-C-U-A.
Starting point is 01:55:07 Ruth. Saving Private Ryan. No. Didn't win. Oh. Didn't win? Who won? Snubs.
Starting point is 01:55:21 Shakespeare in Love won that game. Oh. I meant Shakespeare in Love. Brandon, take that one. I'm out. Shakespeare in Love. No way. If I said this one when I could have said
Starting point is 01:55:41 a color, I'm going to be so upset. Okay. Nice upset. Okay. Ice pool. Lions. Redskins. Oh, wow. Could have said Raiders. Is it me?
Starting point is 01:55:58 You didn't have to. Is it on me? Lemon. Yeah. I don't know what. No, I have so many other answers. Eagles. Why would I do that?
Starting point is 01:56:15 I'm never going to win Sporkle. Ophelia. KB. Oilers. Nice. Packers. Chill. Riachu.
Starting point is 01:56:36 Woo! R-A-I-C-H-U. Goddamn, Kyle. Saints. Silver. Two. Double piece. Skip the next turn for me.
Starting point is 01:57:01 Cleopatra. Cleopatra. Cleopatra. Oh my god. This is bad. Did anyone make a thing of watching meteor showers growing up? I don't think I've ever seen one. My son loves them and I do it for him. My dad will wake me up at like 3 in the morning and he did like the night before he'd ask all the neighbors to turn off all the like their outside lights.
Starting point is 01:57:53 Like a lime. You gonna lock it in, Ron? Um, win it. I'm killing you. Those two empty Pokemon spots Nick yeah five four three
Starting point is 01:58:30 two chloron no fuck that's not a thing you're close right or that's a combo isn't it chloride chlorine that's what I meant oh carbon Is that chloride? Marine, that's what I meant. Oh, carbon.
Starting point is 01:58:49 What the? Well, if he didn't know the last time. All right, I have to go shoot a commercial. Ooh. Platoon, Cornflower, Lavender. Kyle. Executor. Oxygen.
Starting point is 01:59:02 Opress. Cornflower. Sylvia, Reagan, Lavinia, Amelia. These are good ones, though. Proverbs. That one was hard. Obadiah. Chronicles.
Starting point is 01:59:12 What's cornflower? I don't know. I think there'd be lemon before that. All right, we about over? Yeah. I guess so. That is all, Brandon. All right.
Starting point is 01:59:21 See you tomorrow. It's the act It's the act

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