The Yak - There's No Love Lost in the Game of Salad Bowl | The Yak 6-27-23
Episode Date: June 27, 2023That boy is sweatyYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. It's the Yak. Welcome back to another grand episode of the best show on the entire internet.
According to us, to our family members who listen every day, it's me, Kate, Nick, and KB.
And, of course, the lovely booth.
You guys know them.
You love them.
It's the booth.
It's the booth.
Yes, very nice.
You know Zah.
You know Stephen Shea.
You know TJ.
And you love Stanko.
Stanko back there? Do I spy Stanko?
Oh, yeah, you do.
How's the arm, Stanko?
Looks fake for a second there.
The arm is okay. I'm about 80% mobility, 50% strength.
Guess what, dork?
Yeah.
Taylor Swift was on my street again yesterday.
She goes to Mount Sinai for her doctor's appointments.
And the street fills up.
It's insane.
I was diving in the dumpsters for a tongue depressor.
Wait, they line up to see her going to her doctor's appointment?
The whole crowd just to see her go out and walk three feet to the car that picks her up.
I'm crazy, but I'm not that crazy.
I won't do that.
Okay.
I won't do that.
I was so close to getting in the mix, trying to get a video, but then
I stopped.
She's like, what's the
problem, doc? And he's like, it's you.
You're the problem.
She's Palo Di Chi the clown.
I can
go ahead and end my life right now on camera
for you if you want.
Because you're not wearing rowback?
Wow, I'm not wearing rowback.
I feel like an absolute fool.
It's about to be summer.
In fact, it is summer right now.
And wow, look at all that rowback over there.
Just a beautiful array of uh hoodies golf shirts i saw a big cat smacking around golf
balls head to toe rowback he had rowback shorts on he had a rowback shirt on and he had like a
genuine birdie on a par three but he like nailed like a a long ass putt it was super impressive
i don't know if you guys saw that but I think it was due to the rowback,
the breathability.
It just looked so dang good on him.
And, man, tip of the cap to that guy.
Big Cat, the absolute best, the absolute legend. And rowback, even better.
I really love rowback.
I texted the Yak group today with an idea,
and I don't know if you guys are down,
but I really want you guys to be down
because I want to play
salad bowl today. I feel like it'll be
good for us. More than anything.
So I agreed
very quickly because you sent the text standing
next to me. I was pressing you. You told me to agree.
I forget what
salad bowl is. I had to ask him
in the kitchen. The game
where you write something down
and you have to act it out.
Oh, what a great game.
You put it in that big hat.
You could just throw the ideas into the big hat.
Everybody pulls out one of their ideas.
I think that's a really fun game
and I'd like to do it.
That'd be a lot of fun.
Here's the thing though.
I hate to be a party pooper.
The room ain't full. There's the thing, though. What? And I hate to be a party pooper. Yeah?
The room ain't full.
There's only four of us right now.
Little Sasquatch is filming a sketch.
Yeah, hopefully he'll be in later on, but we need to add some people.
Right.
I know it's a pretty full office today, all things considered.
Yeah.
Ebony's out there.
A lot of options.
Ebony.
Jack Mack.
My bro who works for the building, but he is kind of always on our floor
because we must have the most poppin' floor in this building.
Have to.
The entire building.
He's always just poking around.
My guy in the red hoodie.
He's just curious.
He gave me a CD one day.
Really?
Of his own?
He's a rapper.
Yes.
He wants air time.
This is a perfect episode for him to join.
There's Joe in the juice and somebody ordered Vaseline.
There's a little shine to the top of the Vaseline.
There is.
Almost as if someone's been using that Vaseline
and closed the Vaseline with sticky Vaseline-y fingers.
There's actually a hole in it the exact size of my dick.
A pinprick.
There goes Stanko.
Stanko's out.
Probably running to Mount Sinai.
What a...
When did he get a microphone in there?
Well, I didn't want to...
There's a microphone over by where Stanko sits now?
How long has that been there? The entire time?
A little over a year.
What the hell?
We never use it. He's been playing mum.
He has been quiet in that corner.
I don't think he wants to talk.
Sneaky, sneaky Stanko. I wonder if this is the booth's
favorite or least favorite show.
Not this booth, but I'm saying
the tech booth all the way in the back.
Tech guy Andrew and Pete's...
Tech Guy Andrew actually doesn't like anything.
Yeah, well, he likes that sticky icky.
Yeah, he does. He loves to burn.
He loves to get fried off of a tasty little weed pen.
He loves chilling on the patio, too.
Yeah, or even just any half-indoor, half-outdoor area. off of a tasty little weed pen. Loves chilling on the patio, too. Yeah.
Or even just any half-indoor, half-outdoor area.
Pagoda, gazebo.
All that shit.
Pergola.
He has a dream bachelor party coming up.
What's his?
What is it?
One of Montreal.
Gonna see Rufus DeSoul.
He is?
That's perfect in my opinion.
That's gotta be one of the best concerts to go to.
Yeah, in Montreal,
summer.
That's got to be the closest to that scene
in the Matrix
where everybody's
in Babylon,
Buckfest,
the way people dress,
the whole layout.
I feel like it's got to be,
man, he's going to be
having a good time.
The stripper's up there.
Yeah.
I've never been,
but I heard Glennie
talk about the rubbing tugs
up there. He gets his new roos up there Glennie talk about the rubbing tucks up there.
He gets his Nuru's up there too, doesn't he?
Yeah, he loves it.
Nuru is something you can just get.
But here's the thing. I don't think it would...
I thought it was a porn company.
I want to get the kinks out, not find one.
What's Nuru?
I thought it was a pornography company.
I thought it was a massage,
but with breasts. It's a type of massage.
Oh, is that the one where they cover you in oil?
I think they'll just slide up and down.
Slide around on you?
Okay.
That's the petroleum jellies out there.
Let's add Nuru to the wheel.
We're going to have a Nuru coin in the store.
See us, we will slide up and down you.
No, it's Big F.
New Rue from Big F.
Slide up on you.
So how do we figure out who we can add to the mix?
I can't look at it right now.
I mean, it depends on what you do.
We can pick based on we can each get a pick, or we can do a wheel.
Sass is going to be back.
Should we add two people, or should we add three people?
We have another microphone.
We have another microphone.
We all choose a champion, perhaps, and then when Sass comes in,
he has to pick one person to leave.
Oh, that's great.
That's really good.
You all do that.
How do you want to pick?
I mean, you had the idea to spin the mega wheel?
The mega wheel.
Employee wheel?
Can we spin it and just be like, no?
Yeah, yeah.
No, no, we can't.
No, we can't.
I don't know.
No, they can say no, though.
They can say no, but we can't.
Okay.
All right.
Can I put corn in my eggs this morning?
Kind of works.
With cheese or anything or just corn?
Yeah, scrambled eggs with corn.
Why'd you add corn?
Adds a crunch.
Good.
It's like a potato chip.
Why'd you add potato chips?
Talking point.
It's not a talking point.
Dude, I have this fucking crick in my neck.
I can't turn my left.
I can't turn left.
Being in the middle right now is fucking aggravating my crick. Dude, I don't know how I got this fucking crick in my neck and being in the middle right now is fucking my crick dude i don't know
how i got this fucking crick thought we got rid of all the cricks in here brother
let's spin it let's see who we who we land on let's see who we can add to the mix
you know when harry has the sorting hat he's like not slithering not slithering
i do that, but with Fasoli.
PFT.
Not here.
Not here.
Nope, not here.
Golfing.
Everyone is golfing.
That really makes me insecure about my place at this company.
I mean, it definitely is a kind of a reward. Yeah.
Oh, my God.
You guys don't golf.
What are the odds of that?
Wow. No, Figure out the odds.
How do the...
Isn't that 100 times 100
if there's 100?
Correct.
You need a mathematician.
You multiply the number of names by the number of names?
Which is crazy.
What the hell?
We need Quigs.
We need fucking Schumann on this.
If it lands on him again, we just have to wait
until he's back here.
Or just like a Beetlejuice type of situation.
It's like a Biggie Smalls
type of situation.
Into the mirror.
Always scared me.
It's like goddamn Bloody Mary.
What was Bloody Mary's story?
I don't know what her backstory was, but I don't know if you said it
five times or whatever you spun around. She pops up. What's her backstory? Who is she?
Wasn't it Bloody Mary, Queen of Scots? Isn't that what it was based off of? The murderous queen?
Why does she get to live forever as a ghost in a mirror? Well, I thought she was
the victim in the mirror. With the fun of stabbing someone.
No, I'm just saying
it's not unfair that she gets to do that.
For eternity gets to stab
curious little children.
Who's Bloody Mary?
Who the hell
is Bloody Mary?
It's not a biblical Mary.
I thought she was the Queen of Scots.
That sounds more accurate than some biblical
shit.
She was a little murdery, I guess.
That happening twice in a row
is around 1 in 14,000.
Holy shit.
We should tell him, maybe.
Or a.0006% chance.
If it lands on him again,
should we have to mutilate ourselves?
I will
castrate myself. on him again? Should we have to mutilate ourselves? Yeah, I'll show you guys. I will
castrate myself.
Yeah? Yeah.
On air.
What are the odds, right?
Kind of higher now.
Yeah, I'm afraid.
Oh, no! Oh, my God!
Oh, my God!
Oh, I'd rather mutilate myself.
We can't say no.
He will, though.
Yeah.
He might be feeling fun today.
It's totally okay to say no.
From his perspective.
He's allowed to see.
He should, even.
I feel like Stephen Che really wanted in.
Let's all get on the same page.
Loser of salad bowl.
We'll gang up against him.
Has to twerk their ass.
Yeah, yeah.
And we have to bury our face in his ass.
Blackman's ass.
No matter who loses.
No matter who loses.
We all have to just eat his fucking delicious ass.
Are lesbians into fat asses?
As we are?
They gotta be.
Or, I don't know.
Ah, damn.
Maybe they just don't have the, because like population wise, what's the percentage of lesbians?
Because it feels like less than.
Percentage of women or all people.
Yeah, of all people who are lesbians.
Probably one, two percent.
Three.
So beggars might not be able to be choosers. Maybe 5. Maybe higher. I don't know.
But they're probably into it.
Yeah, I bet there's some. From just like the theory
of it. Yeah. The joy of a
big butt's being
behind it, right?
So maybe they don't have that same joy.
There's strap-ons. Yeah, there's that.
And then it's like when you smack
Getting in there.
What do you think, Che?
Blyman is not here today. No in there. What do you think Che? Lyman is not here today.
No no what do you think about what
he was saying? I think everybody likes fat asses.
Except for like in the 80s.
Even the 90s.
I will say I like
I'm not gay but when I see one
I like appreciate it. I stop for a second and
I am like good day to you yeah yeah something about it and the first fat ass was late 90s JLo
and it's in today's standards that's nothing Arthur Fatt yeah Sir Mix-a-Lot I mean he kind of
revolutionized yeah but he was like on some clown.
They were like, this dude's goofy as hell for this.
Yeah, yeah, he was a clown.
It's like someone being...
Yeah, we weren't...
He was coming clean that he likes big bucks.
Yeah, they were like, this guy is weird.
Dude, keep that to yourself.
I feel like it's the same reaction as if someone was like,
I love armpit hair.
A lot of people would be like, oh.
Yeah, I've been seeing that crop up more and more.
Maybe in 15 years, armpit hair will be the fat ass of the 90s.
It looks like it's on the trajectory from what I see.
You can't have armpit hair fucking bouncing on you, though.
But it needs an anthem.
It does.
Come around and fucking sing the praises of armpit hair.
Put a little respect on its name.
It used to be a certain level of hot to get away with it.
You think so?
Yes.
Like, I think if I did it, they'd be like, ah.
But if Margot Robbie was like, look, two little pink patches for Barbie, whatever.
I feel like I'd just be like, all right.
She would get away with it.
People would think yours was unintentional.
It's fair.
We can't be like, I don't, I prefer, I don't prefer that.
We can't even say that anymore.
Oh, definitely not.
That's like, uh, are you, yeah, I'm saying you can't say that.
Yeah, I know.
That's what I, it's like, it's like ableist.
You can't, you can't be like, I would rather not.
It's damn near ableist.
It's like a word you can't say.
Yeah.
Should we spin it again? Yeah.
This might not be working because nobody's here.
Or should we spin the four of our names
to go pick champions?
Can you just take all the prominent, successful people off?
Because they're not here. They're golfing.
Yeah, they're making important decisions.
They're choosing what podcast to put. Oh, and there's the beer olympics going on oh yeah there's a lot
going on dude i had to say no to that did too what time were you asked yeah actually dude i saw dana
and he was like you're the first person i asked too i was like really because nick told me that
you asked him right before,
and he was like, yeah, I actually did ask Nick first.
Yeah, but who was before me?
I think someone was before.
Definitely.
Caleb or somebody else, someone.
Yeah, because I found out I was third.
You need to get to the top of this chain.
Yeah, there was someone before you.
I was third.
You were second.
I don't know who the fuck it was.
Probably a fucking blast down there.
The thing is, why did he was like dying to go?
Is Marina about to renew her vows or something?
He needed any excuse in the book.
He needed to get the fuck out of Dodge.
Damn.
Salute to TJ with the cut to the booth for the reaction.
The reaction is key.
The reaction is key.
You need the joyous reaction. Nobody reacts
better than Zah. I know.
Zah is the one man laugh track.
You put Zah
versus the entire live audience
of Full House, I'm taking Zah.
Yes. It's powerful.
What other shows had
a live audience?
Seinfeld? Or was that piped in?
Was it laugh track? Seinfeld did. All those piped in? Was it Laugh Track? Seinfeld did.
All those comedies did.
Fresh Prince?
Fresh Prince did?
Yeah, there was an episode where they broke the wall.
I think Cosby Show, too.
They did?
I think so.
That is kind of impressive.
That's like to be able to make a bunch of people laugh like that.
Or I guess there's a...
Those would probably be really boring for breaks and...
Yeah.
If you love the show.
It might ruin some of the magic.
It would definitely ruin the magic for me.
I think some signs go up like laugh, applause, that type of thing.
Definitely.
Same with Jimmy Fallon.
The last great ones left.
Jimmy Fallon's new bits are just like he just sings a song that's already out and popular.
No nuance or joke to it.
He just tries his best and sings it.
It's kind of sweet.
I like Jimmy Fallon.
I've always liked Jimmy Fallon.
Yeah?
Before I got here, I used to spend my lunch breaks
watching Jimmy Fallon clips on YouTube.
Yeah.
Like the games that he would play before.
Yeah.
Oh, he's good for a couple giggles.
Yeah. He does and says things that make you giggle? Almost everything he does, yeah. like the games that he would play before yeah oh he's good for a couple giggles yeah like he would
always he does and says things that make you giggle almost everything he does yeah almost
everything he does makes you giggle yeah i think he's a funny guy i bought his cds there is a
tainted dirtiness of like someone becomes a late night host and you have to be like they suck now
yeah i liked him when he was like on snl because i like when guys like break oh yeah yeah and he
breaks all the time he was the king of the break but he kind on SNL, because I like when guys break. Oh, yeah. And he breaks all the time.
He was the king of the break, but he kind of ruined it,
because he would make breaking part of his thing.
So he'd have to break on purpose.
Do intentional breaks, which isn't a break.
It is a funny idea.
I never break.
All right, let's pick champions.
All right.
Who should we send off first
I'll go first
Nick?
Yeah
How about you go first
You wanna go first?
Yeah
Cause I don't want anybody
To take my champion
Oh shit
Fuck yeah
Who are you gonna take
Clemmer?
No he's not here today
He would never take Clemmer
Oh he's going left
What the fuck Who hasn't been on today. He would never take Clemmer. He's going left.
What the fuck?
Who hasn't been on?
Who's he going for over there? Especially for Salad Bowl, too.
Greerzy's in the office today.
Oh.
Who the hell? I'm curious as to
who Noah and Gia are
waiting for, because this means that chicks in the Office is about to get somebody.
They're about to get a big guest.
The way that they're running around right now,
the talent booking department is sprinting through the office right now.
That's a big name.
That's a...
No one's about to come in here.
The Bella Twins or some shit.
It's Eponine, our security guard
There she is
Okay
Shout out to Ebony
I was saying earlier, this is like a weird week of the office
Because this time of year is usually when Dave is knocking heads together
Week before vacation
Usually he's firing somebody,
canceling a show, lighting a fire underneath somebody.
Oh, my God.
I mean, that was, what, 2019 was the last eruption?
Yeah, it was like the Red Wedding.
Nothing compared.
But I think that there have been, like, many eruptions since then,
and before then, there was always something 16, 17, 18.
You could probably trace back historically.
And I'll say, like, we're overdue.
19 was bad, then 20 was,
you know, pandemic, racism.
Then 21,
everything was gone.
We need a, like...
We're overdue for something.
We need a leader that's going to seize power
and be nasty.
So it looks like you were unsuccessful.
Yeah, nobody's here. I'm going to play
twice. I'm choosing myself.
Um, no.
There's a meeting going on upstairs.
What the fuck? What is happening
right now? Yeah. No one
will play salad bowl with us?
Do you want me to go break into the meeting?
No, no, no. I don't mean that. I'm not angry
at you, but I wonder who...
What could they even be meeting about.
What do they meet about?
There's so many meetings.
There's a lot of meetings.
Just bureaucracy. People getting busy for the sake of being busy.
Career middle people trying to shoot their way into fucking importance by making decisions for other people.
A lot of it's just role playing.
We want everything to be more important than it is.
People are rushing to get a salad.
Oh, yeah.
Calm the fuck down.
Calm that shit the fuck down.
I'm fucking tired.
People love rushing and eating.
I know.
Someone needs to...
We need a skull cracker around here.
What the...
I don't know who it could be.
Let's get this game going.
I'll fucking get the PL ride.
Go get, grab three.
Go up into the meeting.
The Pied Piper is KV.
Can you select four people?
He's like an Australian cattle dog.
Is he going upstairs?
There he goes.
Wow, he's walking with purpose.
He really is.
He doesn't play around.
He don't play that. He don't play that.
He don't play around.
What are we going to get?
Gia?
Come on in.
Welcome.
Gia, are you coming to play Salad Bowl?
Did Kyle get you already?
Holy shit.
Yeah, he's good.
That's fine.
He's good.
I didn't even see him do it.
Really, wherever you want.
It's really your call.
I didn't even see.
Oh, hell yes.
See, it's already turning into an all-star guest. Kyle's really your call. I didn't even see. Oh, hell yes. Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.
See, it's already turning into an all-star guest.
Meek, grab a seat, brother.
Meek, Phil. It's your jealous.
No, no, no, because that hat will be used for
salad bowl. Or we could use Meek's lid for that
and you could wear the hat. You could wear the funny hat.
Okay, yeah,
you can wear your hat.
Someone came up to me the other day,
and they were like, we're trying to do a morning show.
And I was like, you know who should have the show?
Gia and Mad Dog.
That's so nice of you to say.
You two, I feel like I always see you guys frolicking.
Yeah.
You guys are always, like, having a bunch of fun together.
It makes me say it.
Mad Dog's ours. Yeah, she's leaving. She's going to Chicago. Yeah, Chicago. I makes me say it. Mad Dog's hours.
Yes, she's leaving.
She's going to Chicago.
I don't know what I'm going to do.
What if she had a morning show every single day?
Do you think that would be enough to make her stay with you,
her best friend?
I think so.
Really?
I would hope so.
What would you guys talk about?
I don't know.
Just everything and anything, I guess.
I know.
I feel like you guys are like Hoda and Kathy Lee,
but like in your early 20s.
Yeah.
We are very much frolicking around the office at all times.
We get lunch every day together.
Does she ever complain or fume?
Sometimes.
She's a very positive person.
Yeah.
Very positive.
It's huge.
Yeah.
We counteract each other very well.
Yeah.
That sounds like a nice, I feel like that would be a nice pairing.
Yeah.
I agree.
Thanks.
Oh, you're on pins and needles right now.
I'm ready to play.
I think, is your cat getting spayed?
Cat's getting spayed.
Oh, fuck.
So you knew.
I have to pick somebody to go.
I'm not picking anyone.
Yeah, call Kyle.
I got a bottle of water.
I'm putting my phone in.
Oh, my God.
My poor cat couldn't eat yesterday.
Are you serious?
I don't even know what that means.
I think it's like the penis is chopped off, but for girls.
What do they do?
Tire tubes?
Probably.
I think it's probably like chemical.
It's probably something nasty.
We'll see.
You wanted kids?
Kittens.
On the road.
I would have adopted one if you gave kittens. What do you mean you wanted kids? Kittens. I would have adopted one if you gave kittens.
What do you mean you wanted them?
You're literally doing all in your power
to seize that from your cat.
I know.
It wasn't really my call.
I kind of just...
Yes, it is your call.
Ellen knew people said she would get periods and shit
if she didn't get spayed.
Yeah.
Scooting across your couch.
Really?
Typical women.
Getting their periods. Yeah, she would have been fucking grumpy with you. Yeah. Bad at you. Yeah. Scooting across your couch. Really? Typical women. Getting their periods.
She would have been fucking grumpy with you.
Yeah.
Bad at you.
Is that why cats get grumpy?
Yeah.
Their periods.
I have a bad track record for that.
Here, I'm going to pull another chair in.
Why don't you pull that chair in and just sit in the Mets-colored chair
and just lower that mic because I still want you to be here.
But I know Sass is going to get super ornery with us
if he doesn't have a nice place to sit.
Should I get scissors, paper, and pencils?
That sounds like a great idea, Kate.
Is this something I'm going to need my glasses for?
I don't know what we're doing.
I didn't even realize you were next to me, Clumber, to be honest.
You can't see him when he's standing on his side.
I think you'll be good to go, bro.
You just slid right in.
Yeah, you can just lower that mic down here.
We freed up a seat for you.
Meek Phil, how's baseball?
Yeah.
It's the worst sport.
Yeah.
Oh, it's a great sport.
You want to sit here?
Yes.
He was just nodding so no one knew that.
Aren't you both Mets fans?
How is this office 85% Mets fans?
Everybody's around here is a Mets fan,
and they all have, like, different perspectives and personalities.
None of you guys are in lockstep with one another.
None of you guys could ever be friends outside of this.
You guys all rant about different parts of the Mets,
like don't agree about things.
Like there's infighting, discord.
Any two Mets fans in the office, imagine them getting a drink.
It wouldn't make sense.
Glimmer and Frank.
Yeah, Frank and I get along very well.
There's no in-yun between you guys.
There's no – you guys don't mesh together.
Yes, we do.
What are you talking about?
I took a road trip all the way to Miami with the man.
Back.
What did you guys talk about?
All sorts of stuff.
He knows a lot about, like, 70s, 80s music.
We talk about movies.
No, you guys took turns having soliloquies,
and you guys just went back and forth.
You didn't ingest a single thing.
There's no give and take in your guys' conversation.
Give, give, give.
If they go on, like, an eight-hour trip, like, car ride together,
they have to get along.
You can't be with someone for that long and not get along.
You think so?
Yes.
Otherwise, they'd kill each other.
I've seen you in back-to-back streams with Frank,
and you guys scream at each other.
That was last year when the team was good.
This year, I really can't argue with them because we suck.
Yeah, Frank was right.
Do you have anything else to fall back on when like baseball is going horribly
no literally not what do you find joy in no joy there's nothing what about books i don't like
aren't you into like like stats at least from other teams and players i hate looking at them
i'd like to play video games but there's like no good games out and i really don't have any
there's no good games no good games what does that even like play an older valid I've TJ that's a fact does that happen new games are
work Thank You TJ play legends of apex I that's too sweaty for me you sweaty for
that means too good of a game yeah it means there's too many try hard
what about fortnight shit I like that so, I like that term for trying hard. Sweaty.
Fire term.
Don't put me on, bro. The game's sweaty as hell.
I'm stealing that.
Damn, bro.
I like that.
Oh, fuck.
That just changed how I see things.
I don't like the term try hard being, like, an insult, though.
It depends.
If it's your, like, field, then no. It's not an insult.
Thanks, Kate.
Yeah, that's...
Thank you, Kate.
We have pens for.
But if I'm playing a video game, I want to win.
Oh, fuck yes.
Yeah, you like that, Sass?
But when I'm playing a video game, I want to have fun.
I'm not trying to win an MLG championship or something.
Do you put it on hard?
Do you put Madden on all Madden when you play?
Oh, yeah.
Well, that's wild sweaty of you, bro.
It is sweaty.
Sweaty is a term in the gaming community.
Oh, you know it?
Oh, you guys both know it.
Yeah.
What does that mean?
It's like you're really good at the game that you're playing.
It's like you're playing so intensely that you start sweating.
Let me dumb it down for you.
Your hands start sweating on me.
Brett Gardner is a sweat in real life baseball.
Oh, he's a sweat.
They call you a sweat?
It's like a hard-o.
Oh, this is good.
It's like being a hard-o.
Yeah.
Same thing as hard-o.
It's like when you get into
like really intense part of the game
like your hands start sweating.
Yeah, G is a gamer.
Yeah.
What do you play?
I'm sweaty in every game.
I play Red Dead Redemption
and Fortnite.
Okay.
Holy fuck.
I need to see you
in Mad Dog's morning show.
You guys just fucking live stream.
You really be sweaty in Red Dead
Redemption though? No, not really.
It's definitely a Fortnite term for sure.
Fortnite because people just build like crazy.
Yeah, exactly. They spam build.
But they put in a no
build mode. I saw that.
Builders are the smart
ones. Yeah, but they're smart
and they're sloppy.
But they're not trying to build architecture. Yeah, but they're trying and they're sloppy. But they're not trying to build architecture.
They're trying to survive.
They just throw down random platforms everywhere.
They're the 14-year-old kids that swipe their mom's credit
card to have all the sick skins and just
high on sugar.
Preach.
Yeah, but what does having skins matter?
It matters. No, it doesn't.
Yes, it does. I can't explain because you're not
well-versed in the... You could never understand, Nick. Put, it doesn't. Yes, it does. I can't explain because you're not well-versed in the...
Oh.
Oh, shit.
You're best.
You could never understand, Nick.
Put it in wrestling terms for him.
Well, I'm not a wrestling person, so I can't put that in terms.
Put it in Pokemon for him.
When a Rayquaza is trying to fight against a...
A Rayquaza?
Yeah, a legendary dragon.
A Piplup.
When two guys are level 100, I guess.
Actually, no, it's not bad comp.
A comp.
I just figured out what that means.
Just comparison.
Yeah.
And this is already a goaded cast right now.
I cannot wait for this game.
All right.
So do you guys understand what we're about to do?
Have you ever played charades, all of you?
Yes.
Yeah.
Is it like, I think we called it fish of you? Yes. Yeah. Is it like,
I think we called it fishbowl in college.
Yeah, that might work too.
It's like different rounds,
kind of?
Yeah, there's one round
where it's just acting.
There's one round
where it's just words.
Right, okay, yeah.
Okay, yeah.
Got it.
We're good.
We used to play this in college,
but we called it fishbowl.
Nothing boring like fishing
or, you know.
Fishing is not boring.
That's an easy get.
Okay.
Do fishing if you want.
So, KB, try and explain it as best you can from nuts to butt for our listeners who maybe haven't heard or our watchers who haven't heard.
I actually don't remember what the rounds are.
And so basically what we're all going to do right now is write down four or five, maybe four things.
Speaking, acting, one word.
That's it.
Okay.
So we're going to write down four things.
They can be a single word.
It can be an action.
It can be a phrase.
Anything that could be acted out and guessed.
It could be complex or as simple as you like.
Sometimes it's fun if it's more complex,
but sometimes you want something simple enough
that's going to work for your charade that you're going to do.
And what we're going to do is we're splitting up into two teams, I believe.
There's going to be two teams of four people each,
and everything is going to go into a salad bowl.
You're going to have to pick something out, and for the first round, you're going to try
and describe as best you can what is on that sheet in front of you.
You're going to describe it to your teammates, and they're going to try.
You can only use one word?
At the beginning.
At the beginning, you can use as many words as you like, except for the words that are
on that. So, if
it was, um,
uh, you know,
uh,
like an American football team.
How many should we put in, Rowan? Sorry to interrupt.
Four things. You just don't want to use the
word of the thing that you're describing.
Basic choice. I'm putting out four things.
Just four random words, or
actions, or you say actions? Words, phrases.
It could be a full sentence.
It could be like Osama Bin Laden eating a pizza.
Or it could be, give another example, KB.
Osama Bin Laden ordering a latte.
Or just like plain old Osama Bin Laden.
Osama Bin Laden crashing planes.
No, that would never happen happened you could write on paper what
it is we just can't like say it you're writing it and everybody's going to throw it into this
salad bowl you're going to pick it out and to your teammates within one minute as fast as you can try
to describe them describe what's on the sheet to everybody once you describe it you set it aside
and that's a point for your team you're trying to get as many points as possible in the first round.
The second round, you're going to have the same salad bowl of everything to choose from,
and you're going to be able to use just one word to try to describe it,
but it'll be the same set of four things that everybody put in.
So they'll be able to reference the first round round and remember, you know, it'll be
a little bit easier because there's only one word that
you're using, but it'll be based
on the guesses that we already had. And the final
round is, you're acting it out.
It's gonna be a charade. A full charade.
That's right. That's right.
Does that make sense to everybody?
Makes perfect sense. Great explanation, Ron.
Just wanted to take a little bit of time to try and explain it.
Explain the rules. You'd be a damn good school teacher.
You would.
Yeah, and the fucking summer's off.
But the only thing is I couldn't take losing Jack Mack's respect like that as a school teacher.
I can't believe Brando just like, was like, I'm out of here.
How does that make you feel?
Honestly, it's kind of nice because now I don't have to get bullied by him anymore.
Does he bully you?
No, he's just, I mean, I feel like he's just rude to everyone.
Oh, I'm the happiest person to never see Brandon Walker step foot in here again.
Wait a minute, do you hate Brandon?
Yes, because Brandon hates me.
I love everyone here except for Brandon Walker.
What did he do to you though so bad?
He does hate you.
Why does he hate you?
Because he hates me.
He's hateful.
Yeah, he's a hateful person.
He must have done something to earn this ire.
It's his pain.
It's the fact that he's a hurt person
that's making him hurt people.
It's a psychological...
I'll miss Brandon.
I will too.
How are we coming on our things?
Have you and Brandon ever butt heads, Meek?
Never butt heads.
I've like cursed at him.
I hope I'm doing this right.
He's cursed back at me.
I think I played this game when I was an intern.
Like literally my first week I was here.
You did make people do charades.
Yeah, you're right. I think that was just a plain
charade though. I think it was just charades, yeah.
Just didn't have the nuance. There's only four things.
I had to do like twerking on a midget
or something like that.
Interesting.
I wonder who wrote that one. How's she gonna do this one?
Does anybody have all four of theirs?
I need one more.
Yeah, I need one more too.
Don't make them too complex.
Oh, no. Oh, no need one more too. Don't make them too complex. Oh, no.
Oh, no, no, yeah.
Hmm.
Do I put them in the
hat when I'm done?
Yep.
Fold them in half.
You can pop them over into that big red hat.
Meek, fill.
What are you doing?
You got to put some scissors if you need them.
Meek, who's number one in the office right now if you had to do power rankings?
Probably my guys.
I'd probably go Jack Mack one.
Right.
I honestly have a social team between me, Bob's number one.
So you're number two?
No, I'm not ranking myself.
Never mind.
I'm just saying probably Jack Mack, Chuck, Sean, the guys on social.
Jack Mack, Chuck, Sean.
Any dark horses?
I'll give Clemmer.
I like that.
Thank you.
Rookie of the year.
Any thoughts on who could be rookie of the year?
Corbin Carroll.
Corbin.
Yes.
Great pick.
Why?
Explain why, Clemmer.
He's on pace to do, what, 30 home run, 40 stolen base season.
I'm talking about in the bar.
I thought I had a – I know. I'm giving you – He's about to play along like I knew season. I'm talking about in the bar. I thought I had a...
I know.
I'm giving you...
He's about to play along like I knew him.
I'm giving you a dumb answer.
I wanted an explanation.
Well-deserved.
I love Corbin.
Corbin's a go-getter.
He helped us with some clips once.
Yeah, I mean, Nick can say Corbin Carroll's
like his producer or something.
How about Jake Malisak at the World Championship?
Is he getting smoked still?
So he did say if his team came in dead last out of all 32,
or out of all 30, he would quit his job here.
He bet his job that they wouldn't come in dead last.
Oh, no.
Well, they're in 27th right now.
He beat Sweden.
They did beat Sweden.
Shout out to him for getting the W.
They need to win out.
If they lose out, they come in dead last, right?
They're in, like, the loser rounds now.
So if they get destroyed in all of their remaining games,
they could get last in the world.
So is he out of being in the Olympics?
No, this was kind of like a precursor to the precursor to the Olympics.
Separate tournament.
This is like setting the world rankings.
This doesn't qualify for the Olympics in any way.
This is like setting the world rankings for the Olympic qualifying round.
I think his teammates are like a 32-year-old teacher.
He's getting no help on defense.
He's playing all right.
He's playing all right?
Good for him.
He played well against Puerto Rico.
He's playing with plumbers and electricians.
No offense to those because my sister's an electrician.
Sister's an electrician?
I am.
Male-dominated field.
It makes a lot of money, too.
Probably.
I don't ask her. Male-dominated field. Yeah. It makes a lot of money, too. Yeah, probably.
I don't ask her, so.
You tell by, like, the way she dresses or acts or talks.
Does she act like an electrician?
Yes.
Yeah?
Yes. How do electricians act?
They have a very distinct act.
Yeah, give me anything.
Is her hair always standing up?
I can't comment because, God forbid, I don't know if she's watching.
I bet she's not.
Is it so much derogatory how they act?
Yeah, wait a minute.
What are some stereotypes of electricians?
No comment.
Okay.
Wow.
Does everybody have their cards in?
I have so much anxiety I didn't do this right.
Why?
I think I probably fucked it up.
What are you talking about?
You didn't know.
You have no wrong answer.
All right, all right, I like that.
I did full sentences, and I don't think any of them are good.
Oh, I did one word.
Yeah, one word.
I'm by me?
It's a nice little mix.
Oh, shit, I did like multiple.
My anxiety's going up.
There's no wrong way.
Breathe, Clemmer.
How do we want to split it up?
Right down the middle?
Sure.
Yeah.
That works. And then we can always split it up? Right down the middle? Sure. Yeah. That works.
And then we can always switch up later.
All right.
Yeah.
Need everybody to relax.
Playing a game for the first time is terrifying.
Do you want us to give you a heat lamp to bask under?
No, just the experience.
Once I do it once or twice, I'll feel better.
It's like riding a bike for the first time.
Heat lamp would help.
It would feel good.
So warm.
You got to really get under the ledges of this hat, just so you know.
Under the foam.
Pop out the foam.
Oh.
Oh.
Wow.
Oh.
That's like a donut.
It does.
Throw that on.
You're going to be on again.
Soon.
Let's put them on the logo.
Let's tweak my face a tiny bit, I guess.
So should they start?
Yeah.
All right.
This team is going to start.
What's your guys' team name?
Meek and the Meekettes.
Meek and the Meekettes will start.
I think, Meek, you should be the first actor.
Is he acting right now?
What's our team name?
You're going to...
No, no, first round is...
Now he's speaking.
First round is he'll explain it in as many words as he needs to explain it.
Oh, well, you need to split them up when you cut them up.
I had all mine on one sheet.
God damn it.
Say what?
I guess there is a way you could fuck this up.
What?
You put all of yours on one sheet of paper and folded it up?
When Kate gave you scissors. I tried it all up. You just made your paper and folded it up? What did you do when Kate gave you scissors?
I turned it all off.
You just made your paper smaller?
What?
You find it.
Go ahead.
Chop it up.
Buddy, just run it, or you could even write it back down on a fresh one,
and then when we get to the one that has –
Wait, whole paper was in there?
Yes.
Kate, how did you not notice when you put that in?
I thought –
At first, he put the whole paper in, and then he cut out a circle of the whole paper.
I'll take the scissors, I assumed.
I did see him cutting one circle.
And so he can say whatever he wants except for the words on that paper.
And once we guess it, make you pick up another one as fast as you can and get us to
keep you put that you don't put it back in though if i get if i get the one that i wrote
oh you do it still do it yeah oh no no no toss that one no and the teams are is it two teams
or four or four teams of two two teams of four teams of four yep what's our team name, Rowan?
It's not up to me. It's up to KB. He's the captain.
How did you like the Zach Bryan concert? I loved it. It was awesome.
What's his best song name?
My favorite song is from Austin, but he didn't
do that one.
His most popular songs are
Something in the Orange.
I'm trying to think of if there's a good team name in one of these songs.
You want to do
like a Zach Bryan-based song?
No.
We can.
All right, KB, you pick.
You pick.
Yeah, you pick.
The Reds?
Yeah, the Cincinnati Reds.
Well, I love that.
Yeah, I like that.
It's really fucking good.
Uh-oh. Oh, my God. Look at this. Oh, no. He does hate you. He does hate you. It's really fucking good Uh oh Oh my god
Look at this
Oh no
He does hate you
He does hate you
He hates you
This is such a come up
I'm not reading
Brandon's not on the show
I'm not reading all that
That one sentence
That ten word sentence
He wasn't kidding
He hates reading
How tiny are yours Meek?
Did you make them really tiny?
Made them really tiny
Made them very small
I love you
Unmissed That's all then sir So you make them really tiny? Made them really tiny. Made them very small. I love you.
Understand.
That's all then.
So you pick them out.
Wait, the timer is going to – isn't there a timer or something or no?
You get like 60 seconds.
60 seconds, so – Oh, yeah.
We got to get the timer.
To get us to guess as many as possible.
Where's the clock?
It'll be up there, but don't even worry about the clock.
You just focus on your three teammates and explaining what you draw out of that.
You can't say any words that are on the card.
I have to act all these out.
No, no, no.
This is all speaking.
This first round's words only.
Verbal only.
Okay.
But also, too, if you pick one and you're like, I can't do this, you can throw it back in.
Throw it right back in.
If it doesn't make sense to you, you can pass.
You just throw it right back in there.
Okay, perfect.
But if it says, like, a toll booth, you can't be like, a booth where you pay.
Yeah, you can't use the words.
Gotcha.
Perfect.
Got it.
Let me go.
So, like, right now?
Yeah, I told you.
As soon as you start going.
Oh, cool timer.
Fart.
No, no.
You can speak.
You can speak.
Oh, my God.
Farting.
Can't fart constipated.
Shitting your pants?
Farting in class.
Preparation H.
Bingo.
Okay, great.
Well, it was probably one he wrote.
That was good.
Wait, what was it?
Farting in class.
Battle.
America.
England.
You could say...
World War...
Fighting the Revolutionary War.
Okay.
I don't know about that.
I have one of mine.
You're doing great.
Clevers are all stacked on top of each other. It was bad handwriting. I'm not using that one. I have one of mine. You're doing great. Clevers are all stacked on top of each other.
That's a bad handwriting.
I'm not using that one.
Okay.
You can put it back.
Yeah, yeah.
Put it back.
People that feed Dave Portnoy.
Pizza makers.
What do you call them?
Making a pizza.
It's also one of mine.
Okay.
Clever, did you fold yours differently?
I just folded in half.
It's the same one I can't read, so.
15 seconds.
Sentences.
Multiple people in this room.
One person in this room turning into a different person.
Clemmer reproducing via asexual reproduction.
Clemmer multiplying due to asexual reproduction.
You're allowed to answer these questions?
Yes.
On your team.
Time's up.
Time's up.
Time's up.
Time's up.
Okay.
That was good.
That was very good.
Good job.
That was very good. That was very good.
Sass.
Sass, set us off.
Sass.
Of course you are, brother.
What was that one?
What was that one?
It was Clemmer multiplying via asexual reproduction.
Clemmer multiplying via asexual reproduction.
Like an amoeba.
All right.
Is that part of it?
Yeah.
One, two, three, four. No. Going for ten. All right. Is that part of it? Yeah.
No.
Going for ten.
Yeah, let's go.
Freeze by three. Going for ten?
Yeah.
How many did he...
I thought he got four, right?
I lost count, so...
He got four.
Yeah, that's four for that.
I just tossed them all on that desk, so...
I'm just going to put our pilot back.
Okay.
All right, ready?
Yep.
Jesus. Terrorists.
Tom O'Banlon trying on shoes.
Yes.
Famous musician at a hospital.
Kind of like a hill, a massive hill.
Who is the famous musician?
I can't tell you.
All right, go to another.
Go to a show you just performed at.
Taylor Swift.
Yes.
Taylor Swift at Mount Sinai Hospital.
Yes.
I don't know what the hell that is.
Reds are catching fire.
I don't like their chances for 10.
Projecting into.
Throw up.
Throwing up into.
A, not a plate, but.
Bowl, throwing up into a bowl.
Throwing up into a cup.
Oh.
Shit.
Skip it, skip it.
Just throw it back in there.
Eat more, big dog.
Come on, sass.
Sucks.
Seven seconds of laughing.
Fucking. Pulling out your money.
Wallet.
Yes, but it's not a regular.
Money clip.
That sucked.
You guys did well.
You were moving at slow motion.
Some of these aren't even fucking things.
Yeah, that's what I was.
There's one that's just not even.
There's one you can't even read.
I don't know who wrote it.
Might be me. Stay out. There's no way's just not even... There's one you can't even read. I don't know who wrote it. Might be me.
Stay out.
There's no way to explain it.
It's definitely a Nick sentence.
You bastard.
No, I don't know what...
How dare you cross the Cincinnati Reds?
I said one of the words in one of them, so I put it back.
It was the one that I fucked up.
Throw up.
We had it.
Okay, ready?
Yeah.
Medication for hemorrhoids.
Preparation H.
Yes.
I don't know what that is.
You don't know what that is?
You're moving your legs down the street.
How do you treat your hemorrhoids?
Skipping.
Just normal.
Walking.
Okay, that's the first word.
And then it's a spider.
Walking into a cobweb?
Yes.
Nice.
That was one of mine.
How many did you do,
Clemmer?
The ball got hit,
but it went outside the line, so it's a
ball.
Damn, you guys are so good.
We stink. Brand, the swoosh.
And then the second part is not
shoes, but that I wear them in combat.
Nike combat boots.
Just two words.
Nike boots. What are yours, Kyle? wear them in combat. Mikey boots. Just two words. Mikey boots.
What are yours, Kyle?
Oh, blank James.
LeBron.
Is that yours, Meek?
Fuck.
What?
Oh, she crashed her plane. Nobody ever
found her.
Okay.
He has sex. He has sex.
He has sex.
Time.
All right.
Great work, Kate.
Kia, you got this.
I entirely forgot these were teams of four when we first started.
I was like, oh, shit, Nick's on our team.
What the hell?
I'm happy.
All right.
We're great teammates.
Yeah, we're damn good.
People confuse us all the time.
All the time.
All the time. All the time.
All the time.
Okay.
I think Stu, the video of you and Frank getting into it in the gambling cave,
Stu thought it was me.
Except you're taller and more handsome.
Oh, no.
We look exactly alike in every way.
Okay.
Are you ready?
All right, Clemmer, no talking during this round, you bastard.
All right.
Let's do this.
Ready?
Yeah.
Okay.
Consuming a beverage that gets you drunk. Let's do this. Ready? Yeah. Okay.
Consuming a beverage that gets you drunk.
Drinking a Bud Light at a neo-Nazi bar.
Drinking a Bud Light at a neo-Nazi bar.
Good.
I have a Bud Light.
The guy who orchestrated the terrorist attack.
Bin Laden.
He's playing.
Bin Laden playing Fortnite really sweaty.
Does that count if I said playing? Did you say playing?
Yeah, I said playing. Oh, that counts. That counts. That counts. That counts. That counts. Keep it playing Fortnite really sweaty. Does that count if I said playing? Did you say playing? Yeah, I said playing.
Oh, that counts. That counts. That counts.
Keep it going. Hurry up.
Yeah, I guess you guys. Okay.
Taking something out of your back pocket and
Go wallet.
Let's go, Sass.
Okay. Vomiting?
Yeah, on a... Plate of vomit.
Let's go, Sass. Turn it up, Sass.
Turn it up.
You're looking at the doctor and you have to look.
Eye test.
Yeah.
I'm going.
Come on now.
Was that the word?
You're eating something that's on spaghetti and then you can't breathe.
Choking on a meatball.
Yeah, but you don't want anyone to see.
Choking on a meatball and being embarrassed about it. Screetly choking on a meatball. All, but you don't want anyone to see. Choking on a meatball and being embarrassed about it.
Screetly choking on a meatball.
All right, that's time, that's time, that's time.
Did we get that?
Yeah.
Yeah.
What was the eye test one?
Eye exam.
That's not it.
Whoa.
Boo.
Can it not be like-
Come on.
No, you got to say-
Oh, okay, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I can't challenge.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. What do you mean you can't sorry, I'm sorry. You can't challenge. I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
What do you mean you can't challenge?
Oh, we can.
It makes it easier when you can say the exact word.
Clemmer, show her how it's done.
Clemmer, you're ready to go.
That was a fucking round for the ages.
How many did I pick up?
Six?
That was all you, Seth.
You did good.
I think I got all of Seth's.
It was six, but the rules police came through.
Yeah, sorry.
That's a public apology for eye exam instead of eye test.
Eye test.
Prison rules.
Prison rules.
Salad bowl.
Me gets ready.
Yep.
Me gets ready.
What that means.
Yay!
Okay, this is a certain kind of beer.
It's controversial.
The average Bud Light drinker.
Okay, this is a natural disaster that happens.
Saving tornado victims with a case of beer.
Correct.
This is what Mike Tyson would do to people
Hunch, knock out
Knock out people
Right, and what do you call
The opposite of Brandon's relationship with Meekville
Knock out healthy
Knock out friendly
Friendly knock out
Friendly TK
Okay, this is what someone does for change and they're homeless.
Panhandle.
Panhandling.
Begging.
And this is what you might wear a hat on.
Begging for head?
Yes.
Oh.
All right, Todd.
Begging for head.
What was that, three?
Three.
That's not going to do it. That's not going to cut it. All three? That's not going to do it.
That's not going to cut it.
That's not going to cut it.
Ready for an eight piece?
Yeah.
Let's clear this one out.
Eight piece.
I'm going to need you to step it up.
A maniac combo, baby.
I need you to find that anger.
None of mine have been picked.
All right, killers.
I kind of forget what I put down there.
Can we change our name to the killers?
All right.
It's already taken.
Passing away.
Dying.
That's a little Phil one.
Find all the tiny ones.
Phil made it easy for us.
Come on, KB.
Jeff, the baseball player.
The MLB player.
Oh my god, Phil.
Using your voice to create a melody.
Singing and then you die on stage.
Or you choke on stage.
Singing and you choke on stage.
And?
And die.
Singing and you choke on stage and die.
Simon Birch killed his...
Mother.
What happened there?
I didn't see it.
I never saw Simon Burch.
Have you guys seen it?
No, me and Kyle actually haven't.
Who is that?
Fuck.
Got it, bro.
Yeah, we got this.
We'll finish it out.
Fleming screaming.
Frank screaming about the Mets.
Oh, screaming.
Oh, screaming.
No, no, no.
That's not it.
Frank yelling about the Mets.
That's it.
There you go. All right, nice. Good round. Good round. Screaming. No, no, no. That's not it. Frank yelling about the mess. That's it. There you go.
Hey.
All right, nice.
Good round.
Good round.
Good round.
How many are left in there?
A good amount.
Enough.
Didn't you guys say a word instead of something else, too?
No.
Give me an example.
We don't want to be like them.
We don't want to be like them.
We're not going to be like them.
We gave you one out of the two fuck-ups.
We're not going to play like them.
You only had one fuck-up. It's okay
Examining saying the word you guys
You have one foul on you me kids. Yeah, you guys one foul one foul. There's a foul ball. Yikes elbow. Yeah
Oh shit. Yeah, it's games get back games getting close controversial
Yeah, I thought we'd be way ahead of you guys, but
classic reds.
Are we okay?
God bless you.
I'm worried.
Are you okay?
He's taking some unnecessary dozen shots over there.
Yeah, he is.
Oh, Jesus.
All right.
Okay.
It's the Mike Tyson punch.
Knockout.
And then it is not your enemy. Knocking out your best friend's mom.
Knocking up your best friend's mom.
And it's not a fair hit.
It's a foul.
Soccer punch.
Simon Burch.
Come on, boys.
Illegal hit.
Oh, my God.
I don't know.
I'm serious.
You had this one, didn't you?
No, I know.
That's what I thought.
It's KOing your best friend's mom with a ball.
This is the one everybody's been.
Yeah.
Oh, wait. These are Meeks 4. Yeah. That's why friend's mom. With a ball. Oh, wait.
These are Meeks 4.
That's why it's confusing.
It's the game
nerds play quickly in arcades
with their feet.
Dance Dance Revolution?
Yes.
But you're playing
it without
both of these.
Roger Pledrick playing Dance Dance Revolution.
You typically have two of these.
Balls.
No, but this is arms.
To play this game with.
Oh, it's legs.
You play the game.
Legs.
Say legs.
Dance Dance Revolution with no legs.
Five.
Zero.
New rule.
One right there.
Yikes.
Kate, every single day you find a way to survive.
Pals.
Can we toss out my garbage bin?
I don't know.
It's the one Meek Phil put in.
Look how small it is.
This looks like a laundry.
It looks like a grocery shopping lizard.
What does that say?
Wishing Bagwell LeBron dying.
Yeah, that would piss.
Dude, it got you.
It confused you.
I can't.
That was so funny.
Is that the one you had?
You were like, I don't know.
That's out.
And you are allowed to say the word if it's on there.
I think conjunctions and articles like and, but, and the work.
Okay.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Okay.
That's fine.
All right.
Ready?
Yep.
Let's get this.
Hitting an insect.
Oh, swatting a fly.
Nice.
Too easy.
Too easy.
Come on, Ron.
Take your time.
Reeling.
Casting.
Fishing.
There we go.
Too easy.
This is blank.
This one's blank.
Is there something on the other side?
The game you play at the arcade.
Playing Dance Dance Revolution.
Dance Dance Revolution with only one leg.
You said no legs. Playing Dance Dance Revolution with only one leg. You said no legs.
Playing Dance Dance Revolution
but you only have one leg.
I should have dropped
Captain Ahab in there somewhere.
I should have dropped
Captain Ahab.
Time to spare.
Maybe I did say none.
Take your time.
Well, I can't say none.
The guy that used to sit
in this seat?
Brandon Walker.
Brandon Walker.
Only his first name.
Brandon moving to Chicago.
Oh.
We just lost the fucking Reds.
The shots that you take.
Doing steroids.
Heroin.
But only getting a huge belly.
Last time we missed, we missed.
All right, keep that in mind, folks.
The round ends when the cards are out.
Right?
Yes.
Yeah.
Yes. That gives us a huge advantage going first, out. Right? Yes. Yeah. Yes.
That gives us a huge advantage going first, doesn't it?
Yes.
It gave you a huge advantage going first.
We're still losing.
All right, Phil, let's finish this.
Oh, we keep going until there's no... I see it.
I know which one it is.
Close your eyes, Phil.
No.
This one.
Yep.
It's in.
You got it.
You're right.
This is still round one.
Yeah, you just got to keep your eyes closed.
Oh, we keep going until they're all gone?
Yeah.
This is your second turn.
You have to keep your eyes closed.
So they need to get all three to win this.
Okay.
Otherwise, it'll be tied.
Fuck up, Phil.
Or they can only get one.
No pressure, Phil.
Go ahead.
You need to get all three to win.
Okay.
Eyes closed.
I have to read.
Okay. All right. I have to read. Okay.
All right.
I'll let you.
It's time to talk about High Noon.
That was a good one, Phil.
Off to a good start.
High Noon.
Kill a seltzer.
Albert Almora did this to someone. KO-ing your best friend's mom with a good start. High noon. Kill a seltzer. Albert Almora did this to someone.
Knock.
K.O.ing your best friend's mom with a foul ball.
He said knock, though.
It says K.O.ing.
He said knock.
It does say K.O.ing.
Oh, we got a third question.
Okay.
I don't know if we count that.
Very bonds, but fat.
A steroid.
The steroid one.
Steroids, but only getting a belly.
Doing steroids, but only getting a belly.
Making steroids, but only getting a belly.
Injecting steroids, but only getting a belly.
Meek, you got to talk, baby.
If you keep shaking the paper, it'll help.
His stomach is very large.
His stomach is very large.
A beer belly.
Steroid belly.
A gut.
The New York. The New belly. The New York!
The New York!
All right, Sass, back to you, Sass.
I feel like I'm talking to some girl at a bar.
You weren't.
We're not walking away.
Oh, Clemmer.
That's your teammate, Clemmer.
This is what I wanted.
All right, ready?
We'll clean this up.
A few more?
Yeah, let's finish it off.
Get up five.
Yeah.
All right, ready?
Let's pull ahead.
Pretty much exactly what he just said.
Doing steroids but only getting a huge belly.
Not huge.
Large.
Large?
Gigant? Giant? Yes. Doing steroids but only getting a giant belly. We huge. Large. Large. Gigant.
Giant.
Yes.
Doing steroids but only getting a giant belly.
We got it.
We got it.
Doing steroids but only getting a giant belly.
Everyone's team.
This would get you.
One shot, one beer.
One perk, one shot.
One perk and three shots.
Yes.
That was the one I had no idea how to even explain.
One perk, three shots.
That's time.
Yay.
I'd do that one back too.
All right.
Everyone got to put them back in.
Let's win the first round.
Round two is acting but with the same cards.
I thought round two is just one word.
And third round is acting, right?
I forget.
Yeah, it's one word, and then third round is no words.
So now we just have to use the best word we can think of.
Yes, correct. And it's the same one.
Wait, so what happens if we put it back
and we can't say that again?
No, it's fine.
You can put them back.
We got all the rest with incredible ease.
All right.
Wow, this is fun.
It's a blast.
So glad I agreed.
Let me talk about High Noon real quick, though.
High Noon, a tequila seltzer that is just absolutely fantastic
because it has real Blanco tequila.
Remember, it has real juice.
It only has 100 calories.
Okay, you with me?
It's gluten-free.
I'm on board.
And there are no added sugars.
Can you say that again?
There are no added sugars,
and that's just one of my favorite things about it.
The other one is just how good it tastes.
And the other one is how many flavors there are.
There's just four fantastic flavors, strawberry, lime, grapefruit, passion fruit.
They'll keep you guessing with the flavors.
It's always something different.
It's always something new.
It's always something exciting with High Noon.
And you can look for them at Drizzly or at your local convenience store, liquor store,
or visit highnoonspirits.com to find some highnoons near you.
We got a whole fridge of them over there. They're probably drinking
them down at Pinehurst.
It's the drink of the summer.
For like three, four years running.
Can't wait for 4 July weekend when I get kicked back and have some
highnoons. You're a regular pitchman.
There we go.
I had to tell people in the production meeting today to stop
coming into the Axe studio and taking highnoons
unless you're on camera.
Because they're so good, they just go so quick.
They have to refill them like once a week.
Let's say some names.
Who was doing it?
I don't know.
Kind of a good thing to do.
I mean, I see some missing ones in the fridge.
Someone got a little happy.
Mm-hmm.
A little happy.
Someone got a little happy.
Who do you think?
I'm not.
No, I mean, who do you suggest it might be?
I don't know.
You got a little happy.
Was it Lindor?
Was it Francisco Lindor?
It was Darren Ruff.
That bastard.
All right.
Freaking Vogelfat.
So is it back to their turn again?
We just went, right?
Just went, yeah.
So I would say they're up, Kate's up.
And she's
trying to get us to guess one word?
Oh, I'm up.
We're still guessing the same cards, but she can only say
a one word hint.
Oh, I can only say one word?
One word.
Was that the second?
Oh, I think that was the third.
I thought, like, you got pretty firm grasp.
I thought one word was the third.
And then now it's charades, and then it's the word.
Well, we don't have to play it.
What do you think would be better for the game?
I feel like subtracting words and getting down to just the action.
Yeah, okay.
Yeah, let's play that one.
If this one's just charades, then the last one is just one word, right?
Everybody seems to think that, so I'm probably wrong.
I think we did that last time,
but I would rather just play what's better.
I like your logical...
Yeah, let's just do the one word.
I fear it may be too hard.
One word, one word.
Oh, yeah.
I think one word makes sense at the end
because then you start to know all of it.
So let's act.
Okay, let's act.
All right, let's act.
So Kate, you're standing up.
No talking, just acting.
TJ, I guess dock them four points because Roan was wrong about the rules.
Only seems fair.
And take about five off for Meek saying knock for KO.
Fair.
Fair.
Oh, no.
The hat has very...
One purpose.
I don't even know how that happens.
That was cosmic.
That made no sense.
It fully flipped over.
It was just like, nah.
I'm tired of this game.
Look, it's back in the exact same spot.
Yeah, you did the same.
Switch it around and have the hat have the brim
so it kind of crumples.
To a good start.
No words.
Eating. Drinking.
Drinking a Bud Light in a neo-nazi bar.
Wait. Fuck. I had it.
One and done.
Is he? Is he?
Helping tornado victims
by delivering a case of beer.
Saving tornado victims with a case
of by the light.
Is that a reference to Dana beers?
No. People do that all
the time.
Clemmer reproducing via
asexual reproduction.
Walked in on doing it.
Doing steroids and getting a giant belly Are we sure?
Are we sure about steroids
But only getting a giant belly
I think that's it
Time
Time
It was way up
Way up
Alright Gia You can leave the hat Time. Time. Time. It was way up. Way up. Way up.
Way up.
All right, Gia.
All right.
You can leave the hat.
Three in charades feels like that was good.
Yes, that was good.
That was very good.
Kate was very good at charades.
Good for a beginner team.
All right.
Immediately discard if it's going to be somewhat complex, I would say.
But we might know it, so don't do that.
Don't let them know that. You got it. I told say. But we might know it, so don't do that. Don't let them know that.
You got it. I'm telling you.
Sound advice.
Foul ball.
Hitting...
Too easy.
Wait a minute. Revolutionary War.
Revolutionary War, yeah.
God damn it.
Farting?
Farting and hoping no one...
I forget what this was. Skip it, skip it, skip it. Farting? Farting and hoping no one... I forget what this was.
I think it was the very first one.
Skip it, skip it, skip it.
Fishing.
Flashwater.
Swatting a fly.
That'll be tricky.
We got plenty of time.
Hula hooping.
Making a pizza.
Making a pizza.
Making a goddamn pizza.
We're getting smoked.
Choking on a meatball?
Discreetly choking on a meatball?
Yeah.
Nice.
Oh, Sassy.
Sassy's hot.
We good
Time's up
Hell of a round
Good round
Everyone give it up for the Reds one time
The Cincinnati Reds
You're right I'm literally out of breath
I didn't expect that
I didn't realize I'd be doing so much jumping.
Yeah.
A lot of movements.
Clemmer.
Clemmer.
Five.
Five.
Five.
Yeah, we can make that.
We got smoked.
That was just an incredible round, so we need to come back.
Yep.
Yeah.
Shoot. Nike boots Yep. Shoot.
Nike boots.
Nike boots.
Wow.
Good job, Kate.
New pile.
Thriving.
Thriving.
Crash.
Amelia Earhart.
Okay.
Perfect.
Good job, Kate.
Praying to God.
Begging.
Praying.
Having.
Begging for head.
Is that what you sound like when you get head?
Throwing up into a plate.
Yeah.
Throwing up on a plate.
On a plate.
Throwing up.
Puking on a plate.
Vomiting on a plate.
Onto a plate.
Into a plate.
Vomiting into a plate.
Puking into a bowl.
Puking into a bowl.
Shit. Keep going. Yikes. a bowl. Kicking into a bowl. Shit.
Keep going.
Yeah, I don't know.
Yikes.
LeBron James.
LeBron.
Throw one away?
Throw it away.
Do the plate one away.
You got time.
You're fine.
You got plenty of time.
Singing Taylor Swift
going to Mount Sinai.
Jesus, Kate.
Wow.
I don't know.
Steel trap.
Going?
Can't make sound effects.
Stop giving hints. Time's up.
Don't give me that look, Clemmer.
That was a really good round.
Hell of a round, Clemmer. Hell of a round. What did you get?
Five? Five.
Hide up. You guys have your weakest
fucking link.
KB? KB acting?
Yeah, I can't move my body.
You can't move his body.
Lots of limitations.
All right, they had a good round.
They got five.
Reign to body.
There's no interval.
I will say, I don't think it was Taylor Swift going to Mount Sinai.
I think it was Taylor Swift singing at Mount Sinai.
Everything she said worked.
It was all in the cards.
I don't think it has to be every word correctly.
We're all turning into enormous.
No, if it does, then we should have another one.
I think we should be able to challenge.
Come on, B.
Come on, Kyle.
We're going to see textbook frustration.
We're going to see a new hue of red.
See that shoulder move he just did?
He's loose.
Drinking a Bud Light
and a perk. A perk and three shots.
Average Bud Light drinker?
Yes! It was out of your hand!
No, it's back.
That was out of your hand.
Throwing up. On a plate.
A plate of throw up? Yeah.
They didn't get in the right order either.
That's exactly what you guys just got credit for oh
We did get credit for it Kelly about the Mets. Yes, that's bullshit. We got fucked there. Oh
Oh singing and you choke and die
What Clem ursop oh, oh your preparation H
Unbelievable stuff.
Eye exam.
I mean, this is why.
That's why he's KB.
That's why they call him KB.
Opening a Velcro wallet.
Jesus Christ.
I'm impressed. Did he add a new one?
I did see a ball in his pocket.
Three shots and a perk.
And one perk.
One perk and three shots.
One perk and three shots.
Drinking a Bud Light at a bar oh and he's just
dancing to close it out
dancing
is that the 10 spot
my god KB
holy shit
you added one
what did you add one fell out of his pocket.
That was it.
That was it.
He just always has them ready in his pocket.
Wait, what is that?
You guys have been a wild card.
Me gets, we're way too honorable with this.
Way too much honor in this Saturday room.
Wow.
Too much honor.
Yes, because we're complaining about everything that happens.
And it was a plate of throw up, wasn't it?
Yeah, a plate of throw up. You wasn't it? Yeah, a plate of throw-up.
You guys had a throw-up on a plate.
You know me.
A piece.
Too easy.
That's why they call him fucking KB.
If anyone could do it, it's Nick.
Farting in class.
Farting in class.
Very nice.
Very nice.
Remember these guys.
Farting in class.
Head.
Plane.
Twin Towers.
Osama Bin Laden.
Shoe shopping.
Buying shoes.
Buying a shoe.
Osama Bin Laden trying on shoes.
Yeah.
You.
You.
Brandon Walker.
Brandon Walker moving to Chicago.
Yeah. Brandon. Brandon Walker. Brandon Walker, move to Chicago. Yeah.
Brandon, move to Chicago.
Osama bin Laden.
What was that head thing that you did?
Osama bin Laden, sweat.
Playing video games?
Sweating and playing video games.
Osama bin Laden, sweat.
Osama bin Laden, sweaty hands.
Osama bin Laden. Fucking shooting out his socks. Osama bin Laden sweat Osama bin Laden sweaty hands One leg. It's the one leg one. One leg. It's the revolution for the one leg.
Ting, ting, ting.
All around by Nikki.
Going once looking ass.
Hell of a round.
My God, Nick.
That was fabulous.
What was the turban one?
Do you remember?
There was no turban one.
It was Osama bin Laden.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
But what is that one? Getting sweaty at Fortnite. Osama bin Laden. Oh, yeah, but what is that one sweating a fortnight Osama? Where has that been? Yeah, I don't know
the wild card
Has somebody been adding
What KB definitely know that was one wild card and it's not getting enough me that Chipotle. I'll say it
Take us home It's not getting enough meat at Chipotle, I'll say it. DJ teleported and put his own on the map. That is wild. All right, come on, Roan.
Take us home.
Ready?
Yep.
Bagwell.
Oh, walking through a cobweb.
Walking into a cobweb.
Walking into a cobweb.
Choking and dying.
Choking.
The secret to secret.
Dying.
Just dying.
Isn't it funny?
Foul ball.
Foul ball.
Knocking out your best friend's mom with a foul ball.
Wow. Ohoul ball. Knocking out your best friend's mom with a foul ball. Wow.
Oh, man.
I hate the red so much.
We battled out there.
Not over, Meek.
I feel like you're giving up.
I thought it was two rounds.
No, third round is just one word.
Oh, I thought we were skipping that one.
Okay.
So we're still in this?
Change the order.
Yeah, this is our round.
You gotta go crazy
in this round.
This round moves quick.
Yeah.
Can't get it in one word.
Just put it back
and take another?
Love it.
Yep.
Simple.
Okay. Wonderful alert. Okay I'm on full alert
Alright
Alright Meek
Try to say more than just um
Yeah
Yeah he shakes the card too
Yeah
Yeah he's got that
That's where I go
Like playing with the
Mute Michael J. Fox
Wait wait
I don't know if we have the timer up.
I want to make sure.
Video games.
That's two words.
Video games.
Shoes.
Nike boots.
Nike boots.
Battle.
Revolutionary war.
Fighting in the revolutionary war.
Vomit.
Throwing up on a plate.
A plate of throw up.
A plate of throw up.
Clemmer.
When will you learn?
Alcohol.
Alcohol. A perk and three shots. Average Bud. When will you learn? Alcohol. Alcohol.
A perk and three shots.
A beverage, bubble, light, drinker.
Three shots and a perk.
Perk and three shots.
Strike two.
Foul ball.
That doesn't count.
You are crazy.
Twice as many words as you did.
Loser.
LeBron.
Dead. He skipped a thing skip I am not dying Amelia Earhart did that get was that it
Meek that wasn't bad wasn't bad at all I can't believe Amelia Earhart's one thing is dead. I would say pilot.
Oh, she's dead.
I mean.
We don't know.
Yeah, I should show them how it's done.
Going for a 20-piece.
20-piece?
20-piece.
I got, what, six or five?
I got, like, three.
One, two, three, four, five.
That's pretty good.
That's round, Meek.
That's solid.
All right, ready?
Yes.
Beer.
Average Bud Light drinker.
We're going to Bud Light at a Nazi rally.
Neo-Nazi bar.
We're going to Bud Light at a Neo-Nazi bar.
This is going to hurt the 20 piece.
Shit, that one's tough.
Baker.
Baker. Playing. Fuck. Baker Baker
Playing
Um
Fuck
I'm thinking like
Pies and cakes
Are coming ahead
Relocating
Brandon Walker moving
Brandon moving to Chicago
Game
Osama Bin Laden
Oh oh oh oh oh
Um
Uh Uh Osama Bin Laden Getting Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
Osama bin Laden getting his party at 4-9.
Oh, fuck.
Baseball.
Cowball.
This one's definitely way harder.
Hospital.
Taylor Swift going to Mount Sinai.
Go. Time, time, time, time, time. That was good. That was good to Mount Sinai. Go.
Time, time, time, time, time.
That was a good pull. That was good.
That's four.
Are we not allowed to say one of the words in the thing?
Right.
Right.
You can't.
No?
Yeah.
Okay.
All right.
That was good, Seth.
No, but baseball for foul ball is fine because it's not one of the words in the end.
Okay.
Thank you.
Okay.
Not happy with my performance.
That was tough for me, too.
I feel not.
You didn't get any. One minute. Don minute don't start I gotta send this to our man
Not thrilled with that one
No no no no no
What's wrong?
No the Mets owner tweeted out something
So you can't see it
Really not thrilled with that one
20 piece and what did I pick up
I'm good
Okay
Jesus
Lower my expectations.
Suck.
I'm begging for a head.
The tone of voice helps.
Suck.
Suck.
You haven't said a word yet, so.
Shit.
Butthole.
Butthole. Butthole.
Two in the oxen.
Farting in class.
Shit.
What the fuck?
Money.
Voker wallet.
Yes.
Money.
Sorry, I'm not good at this
It's harder
Doing great
Doing great
That's two
Oops
Party in class
Yes
I've never seen the tone be changed like this
Very strategic move
Yeah the tone
Eat the ball
Making a pizza
Oh yeah The tone helps Yeah the ball. Make it a pizza.
Oh, yeah.
The tone helps.
Yeah, the accent.
The acting is a no-no.
Not a bad round.
We're applying pressure to the Reds.
All right, Gia.
Thanks, Trent.
I just read a tweet,
and now the Jeff D. Lowe song is stuck in my head again.
Lowe, Lowe.
What song is that?
Stephen Chase song for Jeff D. Lowe.
Host of the Doves.
Jeff D.
On your desk with your trinkets.
Both of those songs were very good.
That was a good poll yesterday.
Did you see Brandon teared up? In an alternate angle
he legitimately teared up.
Why? Because he's so
excited for vacation?
Probably. Happy he's leaving
Meekville behind? Nope, the Chick-fil-A workers
are crying too that he's gone.
They're on vacation too.
True. Okay, ready guys?
Yes. Okay. Ready, guys?
Hemorrhoids.
Operation H.
That was the word.
That would have been such a better... I said butthole.
Skip it.
Sorry. Panicking.
Birth.
Hold on. is there something with
what was birth
I don't know
she swapped it
sex
begging for it no
sex fuck
sorry guys
lock in
fat
doing stairways but only getting a huge belly giant belly You're doing good. You're doing good. Lock in. Sacks. Fat.
Doing stairways but only getting a huge belly.
Giant belly.
Feet.
Sama bin Laden trying on shoes.
I thought it was tying shoes.
Trying on.
Trying on.
Oops.
Practice two points.
Looking.
Eye exam.
Basketball.
Abroad.
Let's go.
Time, time, time, time, time, time, time.
Okay, not bad, not bad.
Why didn't we pull those ones?
Shit for that one, but I'm still happy with the team's performance.
More of a team captain.
Yeah.
SS, you are the captain of the Reds. More of a leader than a performer.
Joey Votto.
Okay.
Is the captain of the Reds right now me?
Probably.
I mean, you don't have a designated captain
But Joey Votto basically
Guy's 40
Who's that dude that just hit the cycle?
He's fly
Yeah
Very good
Very fast
Who's asking Meek Phil?
Sorry
Did they just call him up not too long ago?
Yeah like two weeks ago
I think it's like
Dominican
Is that the fastest anybody's ever hit for a cycle?
Pretty much
It's like 1800
So we're not counting that.
Yeah.
Cool.
Sorry about that.
Listeners, we're talking sports a little bit.
Talking sports.
Go ahead, Climber.
Okay.
Astros.
Bagwell.
Go, Climber.
Redneck.
Brandon moving to Chicago. Damn, I would have said that. You put it back. You moving to Chicago.
Damn, I would have said that.
You put it back.
You put it back.
Don't put it back.
We'll get it again.
It wasn't right.
Clemmer, they're stalling.
Say your words.
Keep going, Clemmer.
Ignore them.
Are you sure it wasn't right?
Clemmer, say your words.
If it wasn't right, then you put it back in.
Clemmer multiplying.
Clemmer asexual.
Asexual reproduction.
Shut the fuck up was how many words.
They're afraid of us, Clemmer.
I hope they're happy with this tainted wind.
Charlotte.
Johansson.
Oh.
Charlotte.
Johansson.
Charlotte Johansson.
That was a bright light at a neo-Nazi bar.
Blaming.
Frank yelling at the match.
Corpse.
Dying.
Dying.
You did good.
You did good, Clement.
I'm better than you.
Did she say Charlotte or Scarlet?
He's talking about the cobweb, right?
Well.
Charlotte.
Charlotte Johansson.
Charlotte Johansson.
Okay.
All right.
I don't know.
Finish this off.
That is so funny to me.
Oh, my God.
Three, two, and one.
Games are not my thing anymore.
Beer.
Average Bud Light drinker.
Yes.
Let's play.
Charlotte.
Walking into a cobweb.
Oh, was that your hint?
I thought you was the neo-Nazi.
Spaghetti.
Discreetly choking on a meatball.
Oh, you said it while choking.
That's good.
Disaster.
Using a Bud Light 30 to save the tornado.
Bring in tornado victims, Bud Light.
Bring in Bud Light to tornado victims.
Count it.
Arcade.
Dance Revolution with one leg, but you only have one leg.
Yes.
I'll say it.
It's not looking good for us.
It doesn't look good for us.
It doesn't look good for us.
That's my wild card.
1990 all over.
Oh, I know it.
Urban.
Osama Bin Laden playing Fortnite really sweaty.
Yeah.
Getting sweaty at Fortnite.
Osama Bin Laden getting sweaty at Fortnite.
You're good.
You're good.
You're good. That was good, you're good.
That was good, that was good, Kyle.
And he gave up the last five seconds out of respect.
Out of respect for the game.
We only need eight.
We only need eight.
I don't think there's eight left.
You got a lot.
You got five or four?
There's nine left.
Oh!
No, there's five.
Oh.
But hey, let's give it a shot.
Let's give it a shot.
Are you ready?
I'm trying to remember what hasn't been said.
I will.
Taylor Swift walking into Mount Sinai.
Singing and then you die.
Singing and then you choke and die.
Okay.
Charlotte.
Disaster.
Bringing Bud Light to
Twister Tornado Victims.
Let's go, Kate.
Okay, here we go.
Simon.
Mom gets
knocked out by the foul ball.
Killing Mom with a foul ball.
Knocking out your best friend's mom
with a foul ball knocking out your
Wild card
Not enough meat it none of running out of stuff at Chipotle
Running out of meat to Chipotle
Meatballs, I'll take it Chipotle Chipotle
That's such a dad Has. Chipotle. Buzz. Aldrin.
Buzz.
Lightyear.
Buzz.
It has to be something that's already been said.
Buzz.
Vibrating.
Are we not?
Vibrating.
It's time.
What was it?
I guess you guys.
Oh, swatting a fly.
Oh.
What's your turn?
Buzz.
Swatting a fly.
There we go.
Ah.
Right.
We were not far.
We weren't far. Hell of a game, gang. We weren't far.
Hell of a game, gang.
We weren't far.
Hell of a game.
That was fun.
I literally broke a sweat.
Yeah, I was huffing and puffing over here.
Game went fast, biologically.
It went super fast, and I'm trying to think of something to compare it to.
I can't think of anything.
Something that sounds like this.
Ring.
Ring.
I guess kind of.
Yeah.
NASCAR.
Yeah.
Another sponsor of the Barstool Yak.
We love NASCAR and a bunch of Barstool people.
Tommy, Large, Spider, Alex Bennett, Bill Compton, Taylor LeJuan.
We're all in Nashville this past Sunday, and they loved it.
They loved the race.
They had a great time.
But next up,
Chicago. My stomping grounds.
That's right. It's going to be a street race
with the biggest names in NASCAR. We'll battle on
Sunday, July 2nd. 100
laps in the NASCAR Cup Series inaugural
Grant Park 220.
Wow. That's going to be so fast.
Two-day music festival beforehand.
Featuring, you know, Chainsmokers.
Amanda Lambert. Black Crows, Charlie Crockett.
Charlie Crockett?
Yep.
Wow, the kid from, oh, that's Charlie Bucket.
Yeah.
Still sounds good, though.
Still sounds fun.
Still sounds like a damn good time.
Chicago Street Race, that will be July 2nd at 5.30 p.m. Eastern time on NBC.
Shout out to Quiggs, man.
That guy knows his NASCAR.
I sometimes look at his props.
Wait, how do we see Quiggs right now?
Oh, he's over there.
Circle area.
Quigley.
In his little circle area.
Jeff.
They're watching Malasek, I bet.
Oh, yeah.
Are they playing?
We check the score on that?
Yeah.
It's very hard to check the score on that.
Oh.
There isn't just like a leaderboard or anything.
Is there a game right now, though, TJ?
Yeah, they're playing Honduras, something like that.
I don't know.
And he's like in the game.
Yeah, he's the starting goalie.
He did get pulled yesterday.
He got pulled?
Yeah. Oh, shit.
For a backup Joseph Slavik.
He gave up like, what, 15 goals in the first half? I'd pull him too. Oh, my God For a backup Joseph Slavic. He gave up, like, what, 15 goals in the first half?
I'd pull him, too.
Oh, my God.
You go and do it.
I can give up 15 goals just like him.
That's not a hard thing to do.
Oh, man.
Oh, shit.
Damn.
This is such a fucking great game.
So with Brandon out of the office, who's going to be your next rivalry?
Oh, I don't like making rivals, so I don't know.
It's 9-7, Czech Republic's winning.
He still gave up seven. He's being carried
by his offense. Were they playing, TJ?
Nine minutes left. Ecuador?
Oh, you've got to beat that.
Why?
Nick, what's going on in Honduras?
Bad stuff.
You can go down there and catch leash from
a sandfly or a wood rat.
What the hell is leash?
It causes a sore that won't heal on your body.
Oh no. It's a parasite that's very
very hard to cure. Is it like a murder
the highest murder rate in the world?
Honduras? Yes. Oh yes.
They're playing Lost in the Highlands.
Leeches are kind of my worst
fears. It's called leash. L-I-E-H.
Oh I thought you said leech.
Leech.
Did I say leash?
We were brainwashed as kids to fear leech.
I know.
Stand by me, the movie.
I know.
I've never seen that movie.
What's that John Candy movie?
They go fishing and they wake up in the boat.
Pulls a leech off his dick.
Jesus Christ.
Wait, say this.
I thought that movie was about little kids.
It is.
Yeah, it is.
Four kids that go and look for a dead body.
And they show his penis.
Okay, so yeah.
They don't show him pulling it.
No, but if there's sexual animation.
It's a whole 20-minute scene.
He does one of those.
And then he passes out, yeah.
Oh, that's funny.
Yeah, I've always been scared of them.
I don't know why.
Yeah, leeches and quicksand.
Quicksand.
Yeah.
Which is a real thing
in honduras yes he went to dude i what were you saying kate just i talked to a guy who went to a
bachelor party in cuba like years ago and they went like snorkeling or whatever in a freshwater
cave and they got a disease from the bat poop in the water yeah and they went blind for like 45
days that's like they literally blind for like 45 days.
They literally, they're like, the doctor's like, you're going to start to lose your sight. It's going to come back.
Biggest thing is wanting to, is like
the biggest fear for you right now. It's like, you're
going to want to off yourself because it's going to be
so miserable. Oh my God.
It's kind of crazy to like know
what it's like to be blind
and then. Yeah. Have that experience?
I'd rather be dead than blind. She's safe. Shout like to be blind and then yeah yeah have that experience i'd rather be dead than blind just
you still listen to baseball on the radio and stuff you cannot do that anymore have you tried
to listen to a baseball game as you're on the radio the radio yeah that's how clemmer watched
baseball games when he was a child with the pitch clock clock now, it's so fast. You're hitting a hater cycle today.
I'm in a dark place.
That's what we do. I'm sorry.
I was going to say, when I went fishing in Iceland,
when we were wading in the water,
you'd randomly just catch a patch
where you'd just start sinking.
That's very horrifying.
The feeling of not being able to move.
You can't get out.
And you're wearing waders, aren't you?
If you go under, you're fucked. If you go under, you just die.
Aren't you not supposed to put your hair in the
water?
I don't know. Oh, at the lagoon.
Oh, oh.
That famous lagoon that everyone goes to, if you put your hair
in the water, it destroys your hair for the rest
of your life. Your bathing suits I've heard as well.
You're supposed to go under in the blue lagoon size?
I didn't go to the Blue Lagoon.
It's like $150.
$150 bucks.
He was all over the globe.
I saw clips of him at Pride.
Oh, I didn't see him.
Vaping.
Vaping at Pride.
Kind of sick.
Best place to do it.
Vape season right now.
I feel like a lot of people are vaping at Pride, to be honest.
And the clouds, you can't see what's going on.
It's good.
Mysterious.
Should we spin the wheel?
I think so.
Oh, fuck yeah.
He got caught vaping?
New York Nico got him.
He's blowing fat clouds.
He has good ass sideburns.
He really does.
Sideburns make him look like he lives in a tenement building.
Is his nails painted?
Yeah.
Yeah, he went to Beauty Bar a couple weeks ago or last weekend.
How was hanging out with him?
It was fine.
Yeah.
Got a shout-out in the production meeting today about that.
Yeah, you did.
Oh, hell yeah.
I just saw that one clip of him getting the ball with Marty and then he hit his head on the.
He was very good.
He was very engaging with like questions and talkative and like, but toward the end, he got really like antsy, ready to drink.
Oh, ready to drink.
Hit the bar.
Did you guys hit the bar?
No, he did.
He did.
Nick, Nick, you didn't?
I passed.
Damn.
I was tired from golf.
I feel like I would be scared.
Drink with him?
Yeah, I don't know.
What if he just...
He's a wild card.
Sometimes he yells at people.
He goes hard.
No, he wasn't.
He was respectful.
Which one of you guys calmed him the most?
What?
Which one of you guys calmed him down the most?
Marty.
I feel like I saw him with Marty
the most.
He was like
rubbing his back.
He's like,
you're good,
you're good.
You're going to
be okay,
he said.
Yeah,
yeah,
yeah.
I'm going to
sue.
Yeah.
Sue who?
Maybe the
golf cart
manufacturer.
The inventor
of the golf cart.
Yeah,
it roofs too low.
Yeah.
Think of us,
dude.
Man,
I like this
cast so much. Yeah, this was fun low. Yeah. Think of us, dude. Man, I like this cast so much.
Yeah, this was fun.
Thanks for having me on, guys.
It's natural.
You're just freaking natural.
You're a natural, Clemmer.
Clemmer's really come out of his shell.
You've worked here for a year.
Almost.
It'd be a year when we get back from July 4th at break.
A few days after May.
I saw, yeah, Nick, you just had your one year again.
Wait, is that real?
Yeah.
You've only been here for a year?
Like, right before Idol.
No, that's not
true. They get me with this every time.
Yeah, okay. I've been here for like four years.
Okay. Nick, I'm gonna be real. My mom
saw that and she actually thought you were the only one.
Wait, and I'm not gonna lie. I liked it and I was like,
oh my god, congrats. I literally said congrats to you in the hallway.
And I thanked you. Yeah, I'm sorry.
I didn't really use my brain there.
Congratulate me.
It actually is my one year.
Congrats, Clemmer.
Oh, yeah, it is.
Congrats.
Glad to have you around.
You're a great teammate.
You're going to post like a real sentimental.
That's like a big thing here is everyone posts.
Yeah, I'll post like a honkers.
My fucking God.
I can't believe it's been a year in paradise.
What did you say? I'll just retweet something and say something. Like someone writes something hateful to me. I can't believe it's been a year in paradise.
What'd you say?
I'll just retweet something and say something,
like someone writes something hateful to me,
and I'll just have a sarcastic remark back.
Whatever way.
Listeners, you heard that.
If you want a free retweet from Clemmer,
say hateful stuff.
Clemmer, I feel like you've been really good with the clapbacks lately.
Yeah.
Clemmer had one of the greatest clapbacks
I've ever heard during the Dozen tournament.
Brandon called him like a skinny fuck or something.
Oh, he called him stupid.
That's right.
Helped him answer the question.
And then Clemmer hit him back with the, like, that's right, you bloated fuck.
Yeah, that's right.
Clemmer, he's great at comebacks.
Clemmer is unbeaten against Francis.
Bloated fuck is just hilarious.
I've never heard someone call someone bloated as like an insult.
Also very accurate.
Phil would agree, right, Phil?
Yes.
Bloated.
Too much Chick-fil-A.
I have to skedaddle.
You guys are welcome.
We got three more shows.
I'm going to talk all day today.
I was eating a lunch when you came and got me, KB.
That was my lunch.
Bagel.
You weren't eating that. I was. a lunch when you came and got me, KB. That was my lunch. Bagel. You weren't eating that. I was!
Oh, fuck.
Reset. Reset.
This is insane.
Oh, I thought this said wet wheel.
Oh, I hope it's carbone.
That would be awesome.
Who pays for it if it's carbone?
Yeah, for the most part.
Predominantly.
Suckle from the teat.
Come on, Carbone.
Could be.
Oh, fuck.
That would have been sick.
All right, you guys have been led.
Thanks for coming on.
Thanks, guys.
You guys are all welcome back.
Appreciate you guys.
Congratulations to the Reds.
Go Reds. Yeah, well done. Well done. Thanks, guys. You guys are all welcome back. Appreciate you guys. Congratulations to the Reds. Go Reds.
Yeah, well done.
Well done.
Thanks, guys.
That was so fun.
See you all tomorrow.
See you tomorrow. We'll see you next time.