The Yak - Walkie-Talkies Have Taken Over The Show | The Yak 5-16-24

Episode Date: May 16, 2024

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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. What's that? What's that? Field goal. Field goal. What was field goal? What does field goal mean? Rowback.

It's the Yak. Rowback.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off. It's a Yak. Rowback.com. Promo code Yak. 20% off. I already said that. Roback.com promo code yak 20% off.

I already said that. All performance hoodies, crew necks, joggers, and more with code yak. I love a short promo code. Sometimes promo codes are too long. That's three letters.

You're not concerned that's too short? No. That's a wrapper. I thought that was Eazy-E. You're right. This is an Eazy-E code. It's not too short.

Too short. Also a rapper. Ah, damn. Oh, shit. It's a record for Stephen Chay ruining the show. Yep. All right. See you guys tomorrow.

Guess we'll just hang it up. Big Cat will be in shortly. He said he would be two minutes left. That's what he said. Two minutes left. I assume he meant late, but he said he'd be two minutes left. Or does that mean he's going to show up when there's two minutes left in the show? But how would he know?

Because we don't have a defined time. Or he's going to come in and do two minutes of just far left wing conspiracies. Which would be entertaining. I think he already did that with the Cheney Barstow. What are the far left wing conspiracies. Which would be entertaining. I think you already did that with the Cheney Barstow. What are the far left conspiracy? I'm not saying they don't exist, but the far right conspiracies get all the... I feel like both of them have the same amount of conspiracies.

Do they not? I don't know. I don't know what the far left ones are. I feel like the far right ones are the ones that get all the attention. Born gay. Oh yeah. They're big into babies being gay and shit. Yeah.

So self-immolation is now a trend? Yeah. Yeah, but, like, that one guy did it. Multiple people have done it. Yeah. Recently. What does that mean so people are setting themselves on fire oh jesus i just look at copycat thing like when shooters do it too i feel like it's like you see that it's a hot ticket item right now you're gonna get major likes or at least a

lot of that but what are you at what cost that's the most painful thing in the world yes it probably really probably is the most painful thing in the world. Yes. It really probably is the most painful thing in the world, right? It's got to be. We've got to give it some credit. That's insane. Setting yourself on fire. Me? No, not you. Would you do it?

It's a trend. It's a hot trend. We were discussing that for the punishment if you're three minutes late to the act. I wouldn't do it for guaranteed world peace. I don't think I have that whatever amount of time it takes in me if i was about to die if i had about five years left yeah five years yeah when uh five days i wouldn't do i'd do five years at any circumstance guaranteed world peace you would be everything would be named you'd be dead yeah shit right and they would just say whoever negotiated the world peace did it

not you there's always just a news story that comes out right after that will bury you catching yourself on fire imagine if you caught yourself on fire before Ander Dingus brought his did you see Ander Dingus hell yeah my name's Ander Dingus and I brought in

a scour patch watermelon it's this kindergarten class that's doing candy salad and andrew dingus brought in i brought in scour patch kids watermelons i see andrew dingus it's andrew dingus andrew dingdingus. The moment that I realized that Barstool Van Talk, which famously had one episode, was probably not long for TV, was we interviewed Dan Patrick. And Dan Patrick used to have the catchphrase, he's on fire, and fuego, right?

And fuego. And we had a whole bit where we were going to light a small fire, controlled fire, underneath his chair. And the producer came up to us like he was giving us the worst news ever. He's like, fellas, we've talked about it at length. I don't think we can light Dan Patrick on

fire. We're just like, what the fuck? Throw a mic and put it on the table? What the fuck is this? It's our show. And you know Dan Patrick was down to be lit on fire. Oh, yeah. Just a small controlled fire underneath his chair. How controlled, though? Controlled.

How? I'm under control. Okay. Like Chef Donnie's pot fire. Yeah. Right underneath. Right. Not sure how controlled that was.

It wasn't. Yeah. I shouldn't. I... Oh. There's a trend, candy salad, where they make candy salad. Cool. All right.

So this is Anderdingus. No. My name is Anderdingus, and I got Sour Patch Watermelon, Sour Patch Strawberries. That's Anderdingus. He's number one. That's like fan cams for him now. That's his only appearance. Wait, TJ, do you see the fan cam for Anderdingus? Oh, that rocks.

Yeah, if you set yourself on fire for World Peace at the same time that drops, you're done. It's all for naught. I just had a memory that I don't want to share because I'm going to get judged, but I should share it. This also is one of those moments where I realize this show is just... I've been doing this show my whole life.

I just finally found you guys in this perfect place. I've been the same guy my whole life. There was a stretch in college where I would start small controlled fires it was just a toilet paper in a metal bowl like in my buddies like living room and it was very funny that is funny but it was also not funny to looking back at it I don't know I'm fired like look a fire like but it's controlled and but it was a shithole of a place out of yeah but still just lighting a fire drunk at like 3 and 3 in the morning in a bowl

I bet you like the landlords want those houses to burn down true alright good point. You feel I wish you guys could have seen It was very funny. That is sitting there drunk. You're just like yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, it's funny Were you into general destruction? No, not really you keep saying it's a controlled fire Like what yeah controlled in your mind just that you say the word control exactly small if you just say it's a controlled fire. What made it controlled in your mind? Just that you say the word controlled? Exactly. If you just say it's a controlled fire, what is someone going to say? It's out of control? What steps did you take to control it? Yeah.

Bull. Metal bull. Yeah. A fire can't get out of control if you're watching it. Yeah. My name is Ander Dingus. And I go. Oh, hell yeah. Ander Dingus and I go oh hell yeah

Andrew Dingus rock yeah I need him hired that's I was up all night last night we need to get

Andrew Dingus on this show I need him full time salary we could hire him we're in the hiring phase now oh yeah apparently

as a parent like you you see this what is your move what do you mean like if you're this is your boy i first say why is my kids elementary school on tiktok yeah that would be the first like get the get these kids off of tiktok yeah stop whoring out my child but like ander dingus was born to be a star that that part is true. Yeah, he was. But I, that's a crazy move to have your kid's school

on social media. A lot of teachers do this. That would not, I would just get this off right now. Yeah, they gotta make money somehow. Every kindergarten, yeah, you're right. That's crazy. Every kindergarten teacher is trying to go viral. Yeah.

Also getting a letter home, like, your kid needs to bring in nerds ropes tomorrow. We're doing candy salad for social studies. Yeah. I guess I'm cool with it, but the social media part's weird. Do they have to sign just for their kid to be in the TikTok? I know for my kid's last daycare, I had to sign, or you had the option to sign like that. They're all on social media and you can either sign or not.

I would definitely not. Yeah. That's crazy. Yeah. But your kid could become the and her dingus. True, true, true.

His life has changed forever. Yeah, no, he's going to get a deal. He's set. So you, as a parent, you kind of cautiously accept some offers?

No, I wouldn't. None? I'm basically just trying to- What if you were broke? Maybe. Yeah. And if my last name was Dingus. Is that his first?

No, I think his full name- That's his entire first name. His first name is Ander Dingus. Thank you. They didn't say his last name to protect his privacy. It's just Jones. Ander Ding just Jones. Andrew Dinkins Jones. Yeah, I mean, my kids are going to end up on social media,

but it's like, can I just wait as long as physically possible? Yeah. I like to dip my sons in the pond every now and then for likes. Yeah. It's pretty easy. You do a good job, Brandon, because you have four, but Tommy's the only one who's out there. Only 25% of them are not.

Although I've gone too far if I'm ever making them do something. If I'm like, do it again, do it again. Oh, yeah. Or if there's a ring light involved. I always just think about if you grew up and then hit high school or college and all your moments as a child were online, it would suck so bad. Oh, yeah. I deleted my old Facebook, my old Instagram. Everything's gone.

I'm so happy there's nothing left. See, the one difficulty I'm facing now is I've got Tommy positioned as this guy who's online and everything. And I'll be goddamned if the 11-year-old ain't turning out better. No kidding. Oh, no. You picked the wrong horse. I might have picked the wrong horse what makes the 11 year old got more on camera charisma i mean this 11 year old he's got it together oh no he's

responsible he's everything the other day he asked me he said uh dad you're going to store and say yeah he said well pick me up some uh powdered sugar some vanilla extract and some confectionery something i want to make churros. He's 11. And I'm like, all right. Motherfucker made some churros. That motherfucker made churros? Churros. Good churros, too.

Like he bakes. I got a baker. You know how big of a cheat code baking or cooking is for content? Yeah. Yeah, you just got to. And I'm sitting here with a motherfucker that plays Fortnite all day. Swords. Sign the papers.

He's in. Make the papers. He's in. Make the switch. Send Tommy down. Send Tommy down to anonymity. Tommy should just be a title. That boy becomes Tommy. Yeah. A new Tommy drop.

Yeah. Yeah. It's like Todd from Raising Cane's. Every dog he gets is Cane. And here's the other thing. He refuses to be on camera. So now I want him to be on camera. Yeah, he's playing hard to get.

No, he should wear a helmet like Marshmallow. Yeah, get him one of those. That's not the worst idea. Have an anonymous son. An anonymous son baker. I might have an anonymous son baker. Yeah, who wears a big metallic helmet. Yeah.

Have a little Daft Punk boy. Yeah. No? Yeah. Daft Punk, Deadmau5, Marshmello. Okay. Remember that streamer? Didn't one of them reveal themselves?

Yeah. There was a streamer that wore a face mask, and he revealed himself. That was Dream. That was Dream. You're thinking of Rey Mysterio. He took his mask off. The streamer Dream showed his face, and the number one trending on Twitter was, he's ugly. He wasn't ugly. No, he and then number one trending on Twitter was, he's ugly.

He looks fine. No, he was fine. But now he's strange. Destiny is saying the N-word. Ah. Comfortably. Comfortably? Yes.

Okay. As an extreme left wing. See, I was going to use my kid to float that, too. Nice. My 11-year-old can't? Okay, all right, fine. Just trying to see where the boundaries are. Yeah, I was saying we are hiring because Nadeau might be back.

Hopefully. What's actually going on there? That was wild video this morning. Jeff Nadeau, I can't quit him personally. I understand. I mean, he just does something every couple months where I'm like, I fucking can't quit this guy. But he is, I wouldn't say he's the brightest. him personally i understand i mean he just does something every couple months where i'm like i fucking can't quit this guy but he is uh i wouldn't say he's the brightest i think he's

smarter than he leads on he's smart okay well let me tell you this story last night he hit me up last night and he's like i have a proposal for you obviously first thing i do when i see this dm come through is i text gaz and d. And I was like, we got something here. And Gaz, 10 minutes later, was like, oh, he just hit me up saying he's got a proposal. 10 minutes after that, Dave goes, he just hit me up saying he's got a proposal. I don't know if he thinks we don't speak, but I think we're back in the Jeff DeDue business. Has his asking price gone up or down? I don't know

how long has it been i saw this coming i knew this was inevitable it is also funny that rico's like he he asked for too much money when rico literally did that with a other job but yeah that clip today rika that was uh we play it all all that hard work he hasn't done anything to you. I just think you've seen this. Like you just said, it's going to be done in four months. Look at that hairline. We've seen it done. He's fucking threatened by me.

That's all it is. That's all it is. That's all it is. Let's stay out of the way. Let's stay out of the way for a few minutes. Go ahead, guys. That's all it is. Were the black kids threatened in 07 when you couldn't walk a ground? It's all few minutes guys it's all the girls in this office that you

threatened you fucking criminal bring him back criminal it's playing motherfucker it's all just fucking conjecture with you it's always fucking this and that i'll be fucking biting your fucking ass What did he say there? He was petting his belly He's like you want me to pet your belly? I'll bite your ass You have a clip of him saying Walking out was a

I think he's wearing mom jeans today Bad day to wear mom jeans You can't flip in mom jeans No It is just funny because And I love Rico but him just being like, Nadeau, you commented on like Liz Gonzalez's blogs. Like Rico, you created a burner after.

They're very much similar and they don't, they're, they both are like, no, you're the bad one. It's beautiful. Yeah. That's pure. Look at this. That's pure. Look at this. That's got to be freeing for Rico. I think those are mom jeans. I think those are mom jeans.

You can't defiantly strut in those jeans. Yeah. Terrible day to wear mom jeans. So is this like addiction or alcoholism? Is he going to go on a bender now? I don't know. I'm washing my hands of whether he gets hired or not. That's up to Gaz and Dave.

I think this is Dave's addiction. Yeah, I mean, I'll say I'm addicted to it as well. Yeah. No, you had pure joy in your face in that gambling case. Oh, I was crying. I was crying tears of laughter. I do think they do in maybe being on Wake Up Mincy as a co-host Yeah

Would you bring your dog here? I don't know I don't know He said he would move here He tweeted it last night Don't smirk like that What was that smirkirk i'm biting my lip uh him and smokes doing like a steal your broads oh god do we have to worry about that with smokes

anymore no oh yeah folks looks horrific i don't think it looks bad i don't think it looks bad either what i don't think it looks bad i think it? I don't think it looks bad. I think it looks fine. Context. He's 24. That's tough. He's 24. His hair looks great. Like, I don't know. That's the problem. That's it?

No, no, no, no. CA. Yeah, it looks. He's 24. And he's a noted, you know, I want to go fuck chicks. So 24, that means that that's not done. No. That's a bad hairline for 24.

This might be the biggest. But the way his hair was was fine. It was doing a decent enough job of hiding it. But he got it out of the way. You got to face that music at some point. Yeah. I think it's for the best. He came up to me and was like Hey I trust your opinion

Do you think Jerry should shave my head I was like yes 100% I don't know man I think 24 Brandon I know what you're saying But that's a 35 year old's hairline Not 24 Yeah

He's got the Landon Donovan going And it's also bad if you go from having hair to that and you didn't realize that that was what it looked like he handled it well did he i think he ran into the bathroom and locked himself in the stall yeah that's how you handle things yeah i'd from and then and then texted and then texted every single person in the office and tweeted our texts. Yeah. But then he put out like a TikTok without a hat on. Yeah, he's walking around without a hat now.

You'd think he's coming to terms. Can we find him? Is he upstairs? He's in the gambling cave, I think. Well, no, he's not. Is that Bader? Yeah. Yeah.

We have a show later. Oh, wow. It looks bad from this angle. It's like right above his ear. So much skin. wow. It looks bad from this angle. It's like right above his ear. So much skin. Yeah. Looks Star Trek-ish. Zoom in. Can we zoom in more?

No. Damn. I don't think it was time to push that button. Oh, dad. I think he had plenty of time left on the clock. It was a panic moment. Oh, no. Oh.

Oh. Oh, shit. No, Oh. Oh, shit. No, he doesn't look bad. He told me he might do steroids now. Wouldn't that make this particular problem worse? Possibly, yes. But he's like, I need to counteract the hair. Is there a possible hair loss element?

So that's just not a great angle. Yeah, but what's a good angle? This is bad. I think he is handling it well. He is. Oh, man. His ego's in that box. Yeah.

Look at it. Look how deep that goes. I will say. There's so much forehead. But there's something distinguished about it. But then you find out 24. It's attached to a moron. Yeah.

Let's just keep it on this. Attached to a moron. Yeah. Like you just said, there's something distinguished about it. Yeah, but there's nothing. It's literally on top of a moron. Yeah, he's no supplement to the. It would be fine if he was like a CPA.

This is somebody that's like working on their thesis there for their phd right yeah he's got to wear a sweater and just sit in a library oh look at that shine so shine i could see us this is a guy who dates like a very meek pasty girlfriend yep no tits no ass yeah cool, bud. I'm just saying, that's not what he... Okay. All right. That doesn't look cool. That actually looks like

he should be arrested. That looks so natural. Yeah. That looked normal with that. Yeah. Look, it's just so deep. It looks like... It's almost like...

Say he goes out. ...weaponized. It's like almost... It's like topographical. Yeah. It's like an island was made out of a volcano. It's like a heat map of it. Yeah, and that's the ocean right there.

But it has natural curves. I like it. But you can see where the rest of his head goes. Yeah, it's just going all. It's running. Like, that's running backwards. This is LeBron James in 2015. He's got nothing to stop that.

It's on the run. He goes out in Chicago with the hat on. Yeah, Landon Donovan. He's got nothing to stop that. It's on the run. He goes out in Chicago with the hat on. Yeah, Landon Donovan. He hits it off with a girl. He's wearing the hat all night. They go back to his place. Before he takes the hat off, do you think he needs to say, like, by the way, I'm growing it back up.

You've got to ask Gass. Do you think he has to say something? Yeah, Gass never takes his hat off, even for sex. Really? Yeah. Respect. Flip it backwards, I guess. No, I think he keeps it forward so he doesn't have to kiss. Yeah Gaz never takes his hat off even for sex Really? Yeah Respect Flip it backwards I guess No I think he keeps it forward so he doesn't have to kiss

Gaz hates kissing Yep He's good at it but he hates kissing Really good at it One of the best kissers we've had But I think that's why he stopped It's boring to him now Yeah

He's like Leo What are you waving to? I was saying hello to Spike I saw Gaz yawning while kissing once. It's boring to me. Oh, fuck. All right, so we did have an update I wanted to share with everyone. I shared with you guys last night, but I talked to Stanko yesterday.

By the way, Stephen Shea, all-time cringe-worthy moment on The Dozen yesterday. We had a movie question. He called Stanko and he was like in his very Stephen Chay voice was like, first off, how you doing? But it's a timed question. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if you have the clip, TJ, but yeah. And Stanko was like, I'm still alive.

So I called Stanko last night to talk to him and he actually said that the chemo he's starting to eat a little more so hopefully things are working but what we decided on Stanko and I everything's covered right now but he is getting married in a month and so tomorrow we want to do

a special Stanko episode where maybe we're going to open up his venmo people do not have to give a single dollar that's not what it's about you do not feel bad but we're going to get him a wedding gift yep and it could be you know first class tickets where his honeymoon is or whatever but just something because we love the guy and obviously he's going through uh a lot right now so that will be tomorrow we just got to figure out what we're going to do yeah okay and how we're gonna do it i was thinking i had two thoughts one's really really bad i shouldn't say

out loud why don't you start with the first one that in what way start with that wheel to see who has to say the idea out loud i'll say it for you if you want to send it to me. Okay. Yeah. I'm used to this. But if Mook says it, there's no chance I'll like it. Right. Maybe you will. Maybe today I turn. This is Mook's idea. Oh, Jesus.

This is Mook's idea. Mook, say it. All right, I love you, Stanko. Maybe we should do a chemo draft. What? Dude. No, that's better than a chemo draft. What? Dude. No, that's better than I thought. Luke, come on.

Come on. Come on, man. I've said worse things on here for sure. No. Yeah, the sleeping on the bed. Or the couch. What? When he slept on the couch.

Yeah, but he just said chemo draft. Right. No. Yeah, we're not going to do it. Yeah. but he just said chemo draft. Right. No. Yeah, we're not going to do it. Yeah. I was thinking stanko draft. Stanko. We could do a stanko draft.

We could do a draft. Is there a way to take his favorite things like movies and being in shape? Running. Running. I like that. Well, what did he say about Taylor Swift? Oh, he loves Taylor Swift. Attending that concert, he wouldn't have sold those tickets for a million dollars. A million dollars.

Yes. Okay. We could put a wheel together of Stanko's interests and do a KB's Wild. Oh, maybe this money could get him to a Taylor Swift concert. Ooh. Oh. He's been to one, though. Front row?

Yeah, I know, but front row, flying to one? Yeah. Oh. He's been to one though. Front row. Yeah, I know. But like front row, like flying to one. Yeah. Ooh. Whatever money is given to him tomorrow, I think he's going to use as an experience, which will be great. It has to be an experience. Yeah. Okay.

We'll think about it. We'll come up with something. I like the idea of things that he likes. He's a movies guy. He's a fitness guy, right? What's the college that he blogs about? I don't know. Iona?

Is it? It's a college nobody else gives an iota of a fuck about. I think it is Iona. And he has extensive blogs on it. He worked at Iona. I know that. I think he's got Iona blogs then. Yeah.

Iona basketball. Okay. Okay. We got some. Yeah, well, send us ideas too. I think Iona blogs then Yeah Iona basketball Okay Okay We got some Yeah well Send us ideas too If people have ideas We're gonna do a special

And Stanko's gonna If he's Feeling up to it He said he'd zoom in tomorrow Love it Yeah So we'll get to see him Perfect

Yak legend Are you guys nervous About your Mincy show tonight? Yes Yes and no legend. Are you guys nervous about your Mincy show tonight? Yes. Yes and no. We ran some crowd work by Mincy and he was actually surprisingly on his toes. And apparently, Brandon

said his premise for his bit isn't bad. So he is... This should come as no surprise, but he is confident in what he's put together. But the whole reason he's doing this is because he credits you, Brandon. He said he saw you do it, and he said if you could do it, he can. How did the crowd work out?

I continue to be confused by this. Oh, we ran him some crowd work today. So I was like, all right, ask me what my job is. Oh, you guys were the crowd. Yeah. Yeah. We were a gay couple. Nick was unemployed. You were a gay couple nick was unemployed you were

a burn victim oh no i worked at a burn ward okay he did he believe that oh no but he because he was like okay what's your profession and i said i work at a burn where he said no you don't he said you work here that's pretty good crowd work it's funny that's funny no what they do no we don't so his premise is is is not he says he's got five to seven minutes off the top and the rest he's gonna wing um and if he pulls off the premise it's it's okay i think well he also said it doesn't matter if he fails because he's like even when i mess up it just goes good he just can't be adequate right the thing is, you can mess up online and get reaction, but messing up in person and the awkward silence and get bombing

is much different. It will not be spectacular. I don't think it matters to him. I don't think he'll notice. I don't think he'll notice. I think he might feel something different he's never felt before tonight. I don't know. I don't think he's capable of that feeling.

He's had all the chances in the world to feel whatever that is. I'm capable of that feeling. I agree with you, Brandon. Which is a great thing. Imagine not being capable of that feeling. I think there's a word for that. Probably several.

I'm going. I'm excited. He could get booed off stage. He could get booed off stage with that shepherd booed off stage with like that shepherd's hook And he would be like I think I did pretty well It is being recorded Is it? Oh no Well we have a set up

Did you record mine? Yeah Oh well get it to me Alright so we can watch some clips My mom wants to see I don't know if we'll get it back me. I want it. Yeah, you want it? Yeah. All right, so we can watch some clips? My mom wants to see it. Yeah, possibly, yeah. I don't know if we'll get it back right away, but we will have clips. Your guy's friend Josh Potter's going to be here tomorrow.

Yeah. Yeah. He's here today. Yeah, he's coming on the act tomorrow. Love him. Yeah, he's the man. He's a real cretin. Really?

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. He's a real bug of a man. He's a dungeon guy. Oh, yeah. Filth's filth. You guys are friends with this guy?

Yeah, we love him. Yeah, he's great. He's the type of dude that he once fell off a moat. No, he fell into a moat. He fell into a moat. Unless you're Christ or something. Wait, falling into a moat seems like that could happen. He did fall into a moat.

Who falls into a moat? He can't see shit. He got trapped. You're going to could happen. He did fall into a moat. Who falls into a moat? He can't see shit. He got trapped. You're going to love him. He's like blind? Yes. His gauntlet time is going to be in the hour. Oh my God.

I'm excited. Where'd you meet this guy? He's a huge barstool guy, but he's a comic. He reached out to us. He's a producer. He produced Tom Segura's podcast, Your Mom's House. Oh, awesome. Yeah, does his own now.

I think Tommy Pope and Chris O'Connor are going to be here on Monday. Golly. They're awesome. Those guys are funny. Will you give me that look? I was like, wow, Tommy Pope and Chris O'Connor, yeah. So we're having comics come in after Mintz does the show. He's going to be yapping.

But if I didn't know him, who are they? Stuff Island. Oh, yeah. Chris is in Shane's new Netflix show. Okay. I think he looks like he's one of the main characters. Tires. Tires.

Which Francis is in as well. That's right. Very excited for that. Tires. Tires. Tires. Comes out the 23rd. Yeah, you should do a Netflix show called Tired.

I am always tired. I skipped my nap this morning. What? Yeah. You're not that cranky. I was a little cranky on mostly sports, but I've got more of it. A little bit, yeah. But it's hard to tell with Brandon.

Yeah. Have you thought about, because you nap when you get in, have you thought about just coming in at like 10 p.m. and just sleeping? Hmm. I do like my own bed at home, though. Okay, but what if we got you a bed here? Then it's lights out. I might just not ever go home.

I don't do that because that would be bad. When you're cranky, do you like being touched? I don't mind being touched at any time. Really? I can be touched. Okay. Maybe not. No, when I'm the slightest bit cranky. Dan, now you're pressing. There's touching and pressing.

You like to crack an egg over your head. It tingles every goddamn time. Is anybody good at that? Over your head. You tingles every goddamn time. Is anybody good at that? Yeah. You just hit yourself. Well, that's how you crack the egg. You gotta crack the egg.

No, I always popped them on the head. Maybe I was assaulting people. My aunt used to do that to me, and it made me feel something. Yeah. It was a strange feeling. What did it make you feel? Oh, no. not in that way but a different kind of way there is an awesome feeling that you just don't

get anymore rarely the hair raising the tingles you gotta get one of those head massagers it's like only haircuts basically that's why people listen to ASMR that's what they're hoping to get the tingles I get it from random dudes voices what yeah like what random dude i can't control it

like the guy making the perfect sandwich it's not him it's not even when they try to do asmr intentionally it'll just be at like a a suit shop yeah i got a goosebump feeling last night coaching ball really we have a kid pride for your kid though well no it wasn't my kid that's the weird thing we have a kid who's just who's not good who's learning who's learning and he's just coming along and and last night a kid or another team hit a line drive and he reached up and caught it oh that's awesome and i just i got goosebumps that's that's awesome i just started running and i think i just got i just got from the description yeah i i didn't know i had that feeling, but I just got.

I got fired the fuck up. I yelled. Ran over. Ran onto the field. Gave him a high five. You ran on the field? I was already on the field. Oh.

Because it's one of those where you stand behind the kids. Right, right. Hey, pay attention. One of them. Wait. Coach pitches it full coach pitch or does the kids get like three pitches? Kids get five pitches. It doesn't work.

Then the coach pitches. Why don't. If the coaches are pitching, why don't you just intentionally walk all the batters and then you run up the score? Because there is no walk. You guys could win. You can't walk. He's also pitching against.

Are you pitching against the other team? No, you pitch to your kids. That's what I'm saying. You pitch to your kids. Just keep walking them. Got it. Just beat them. Hit all of them.

You load the bases. Hit another one. That's a run. You just do that. You run up the score. It's so fun. If they get beaned, they just get up and keep hitting. Have you beaned a boy?

I'm not the pitcher anymore. So you've been a boy. I didn't bean a boy. I was only the number two starter. I'm not the ace. The ace wasn't there one day, so I had the spot start. But I'm not the starter has a boy been beamed not by me i haven't been to boy i'm very i'm very good you're really

avoiding a yes or no question i i've never been to boy have you been to girl i never been to girl okay i've never been to girl or like a technical well i've been to boy when i was a boy of course oh yeah i've been several boys when i was a boy yeah um but i never been to boys an adult got it getting beamed as a boy sucked why did they call it beans i don't know it is silly i got beamed in the helmet as a boy that fucking i got i got beamed by gerardard Williams. Dead in the center of the back. Yeah. Hurt. You're like, I don't want to play this anymore.

He could throw hard. Ball's too hard. I think he's. Bean in boys. I think he's still alive. Hope so. Yeah. Good guy.

Quiet. Gerard Williams. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He used to hang out with Dwayne Jefferson. He played in Greeks. Dwayne Jefferson? You beat in Greece. Dwayne Jefferson?

He played in the dunk contest. Bean ball. Is it cool to be using baseball for a ball thrown at an opposing player with the intention of striking them, such as to cause harm? Beans were so fucking popular back then. Oh, so getting bean meant getting hit in the head. Oh. It now is anywhere on the body, right, or no?

You, like, drill a guy In the back You beamed him TJ I kinda I think bean Is normally head But bean is normally head In my mind

Isn't bean as well Getting hit with a ball I think it's just getting hit Right That's what I thought I thought it was just getting hit But Yeah

In my mind It's a headshot I thought a bean ball Was just hit I like that slang I got bean last weekend I just love getting hit but yeah in my mind it's it's a headshot i thought a beanball was just hit i like that slang i got bean last weekend i used to love getting hit i got beamed off you still love getting i used to try to get hit by pitches all the time it's way easier than swinging i hated it mincy got a tiktok tj you just texted us oh no mincy text i saw him doing like an outfit reveal he got a TikTok. So what is it exactly you do for this company?

Mainly make mistakes and inappropriate comments. Oh, man. Pretty good. He nailed it. I'm not going to be tuned into any of those. I withdraw. I'm going to block him. I'm out of quota. Yeah. Him just doing lip syncs. He'll never get one. No. If he's just going to do a bunch of lip syncs. He'll never get one.

No. Well, if he's just going to do a bunch of lip syncs where he never gets close, I might watch it. Yeah, that's fun. I might watch them. Yeah, watch that again, that second part. That was pretty good. I mean, he didn't get close. Not even close.

Didn't start at the same time. Didn't do anything. Didn't really say the words. I don't get the lip sync thing. Why don't you just say it? So what does it exactly do for this company? Mainly make mistakes. Wait a minute.

What words did he say? How does his face do that? What the hell? He become a blobfish? Yeah. All right. I don't know. I don't know either, Big Cat right i don't know i don't know either big cat i don't know he went destroyer mincy for that account doesn't he have another one that's destroyer mincy i went back to his really early tiktoks one day and it was it was one of the most unkempt a man has ever been in his

life he had like the filthiest pants, no shoes, and then like the drawstrings on his hoodie were down to his like big toes. Longer than a Monday. He's the best. He's going to crush today. He is. He will. You guys got a strategy for the summer?

First full summer in Chicago. I'm a little intimidated. Yeah. You have plans, or are you just seeing what comes up? It's stressing me out. Yeah. I'm already nervous. Best summer city.

Yeah. My plan is no plan. A lot of FOMO. I have FOMO already. I do, too. Beach. I'm nervous I'm not going to do enough. I'm not doing the right things.

I want to find the right beach spot. I'm very I'm not going to do enough. I'm not doing the right things. I want to find the right beach spot. I'm very concerned about that. I would say the good place to start is you got to go to street festivals. Those are good jumping off points for good Chicago summer days. What about the area along the river? I think there's some bars. Is that fun? Yeah.

That's new-ish. Yeah. But I would go whenever whenever they have, like, I know the old town art fair is a lot of fun. Like they just close down well street and it's just, you can drink, you can walk around. That's like,

and then it just leads to whatever Cubs games, a lot of block parties. It feels like, yeah, like, yeah, that's basically like bigger block parties. Oh,

but yeah, there, there is that feeling whenever you get to a summer you're like shit yeah because then the the there's nothing worse than scrolling instagram in summer yeah it's like everyone has the perfect plans except you like they're on a perfect lake i went to wrigley today i was supposed to go to the beach everyone was at the yeah right why fuck dude i went to wrigley or like fourth of july comes around it's like you just see like all these people on a boat yeah now it's like the people have graduated from any domestic it's all the france yeah yeah mediterranean yeah you have to be there

my favorite thing to do in chicago in the summer is go to france yeah it is it is like different than new y York Where everyone goes Like the Hamptons Or the Jersey Shore Like most people Stick around Which does make it More fun

Yeah Okay Yeah you gotta find Some block parties Some rooftops Routed Rooftops Who's got a rooftop

Yeah rooftop Rooftop pools I have a good one Rooftop parties Are the best Yeah we ripped one Took me to like Dudes who were in a frat but

still live in a frat in chicago that rocks yeah it's awesome adult frats it's like you can just do that it's a bunch of kansas alum they they have like each floor and like a three-story oh my god that's awesome singer out there you played one game of beer ball then left yeah i got an hour out of KB. That's more than enough. That's a perfect amount of time. Did you get a dub? I got the dub and left.

Nice. You just want a taste of it. Said I'm going to the bathroom. No. I knew you were gone. Yeah. I knew it. You got to find some good rooftops. Yeah.

Day drinking. I want to do that. Brandon, you should become like an alcoholic this summer. Party with us. Yeah, that'd be awesome. It would be awesome. I don't think that's the best goal to have. But cool guy Brandon is everyone's favorite.

And he comes out when you have a little bit. Yeah, y'all ruined it last week. What? What do you mean? Came out in that suit. I had the sunglasses. That wasn't cool guy Brandon. I know I was about to go a full hour of cool guy Brandon.

No, no, no. Don't put that on me. You have to be drunk or high to be cool. You did put that suit on you, Kate. That was all you. One million percent. Very much on you. Oh.

Cool guy Brandon rocks. Can I tell y'all something? What? Yeah. I like the suit a lot. I think I'm going to go with fit Fridays. What? I'm going to go with fit Fridays. What? I'm going to do what we did last Friday every Friday of the summer.

What? I'm going to do fit Thursdays and beat you to it by one day. Fuck. You're going to wear something nice tomorrow? Tomorrow might be tough. But once the summer starts. There's no fucking chance in hell you do this once. Once the summer starts, I'm doing it.

Who's with me? Why would you want to wear. Once the summer starts, I'm doing it. Who's with me? Why would you want to wear a suit on a Friday in August? Why did I wear a suit on a Friday in May? Because we were testing out outfits. Why were we testing it? The only reason you test out something is to see if you like it. Yeah, but. We all said we want to wear something for the summer.

Then if I like it, I'm going to do it. Well, I'm the only one who's going to do it. Yeah, and you're dumb as shit. No, I'm with you. So who's... I'll do it. Come on, guys. What if we all just got together this one time?

I'll do it. Just this once. Who's the man of his word? I'm going to do it. Y'all don't have to do it. I will. Kate? I really going to do it. Y'all don't have to do it. I will. Kate? I really want to.

I've been thinking a lot about my style recently. You can't tell. No. I want to learn how to go thrifting and find funky thrift shit, and maybe every Friday I'll wear a thrift find. Big cat. It's very exciting for everyone. Shopping day?

I'm in. You just got to tell me when we're starting. Is it starting tomorrow? Whenever I remember to start. You said when summer gets here. Summer's not here yet. When is summer? First Friday after Memorial Day is summer.

That's your summer? Can we do another one where we pick each other's like we each get a different person? We have to like really try. We won't be nice. Okay. No, there's no chance. I can't trust us with that.

That's fair. That's fair at all. I'm going to put Kate in a hazmat suit. The worst. I'd be for the best. Yeah. All right. So you let me know.

I'll let y'all know. I feel like you're not going to though. Cause you want a peacock. It sounds like you want to be the guy. Yeah. I feel like you're not going to, though, because you want a peacock. You want to be the guy. He's going to let us know at 11.59 on Friday. I'm going to do it tomorrow, actually. I'll kick us off tomorrow.

I'll kick us off tomorrow. You want to do it with me? You're the worst a human could be. You're the worst. You say he's kicking it off. You're the worst a human could be. I cannot win with this You say he's kicking it off. You're the worst a human could be. I'm not winning with this guy. You're just begging people to be on board. You're just begging.

Humans can be pretty bad, dude. Yeah, you're right. Wait, shit. Hold on. Yeah. Oh my god, Tyson's the worst guy. It's about goddamn time. The worst a human could be. What's in the box?

You didn't notice the box? Yeah. Oh. Oh! You didn't notice the box? I thought that was yours. Yeah, it is. Are these what I think they are? What do I hope? Oh! My god.

Shoes for KB. Oh. No! That's not what I thought they were. No, there's a battery warning on the bag. By the way, I never got the second Bobby you're not singing that I sing in the box song what's in the box? Time for another unbound. Oh, yeah. Walkie-talkies.

Let's fucking go. Oh, they're beautiful. Oh, they're high-tech. Yeah, they're high-tech. Again, so many wires. Yeah, I'm out. No, hold on. Shut up. Yeah, I'm out.

Don't do this. Yeah, who's with us? Are they pre-charged, do you think? It's British. Was it? I don't know. Hello? Well, there's nobody.

Oh, how scary would that be if you got something back? Think about this noise. Like that. Yeah. That scratches an itch for me. It makes me feel something. Like your aunt? Yep.

Yeah, what did you say? Yeah, we glossed over that too fast. Makes you feel some type of way. Makes me feel special. All right, so channel one. Brandon, can you hear me? Wait, Brandon, run away. Hi.

I didn't hear you at all. All right, I'm on it. Turn it up. you have to be on the same channel or different same Brandon Brandon Brandon come over such a no, can you hear me? Over. Hey, Kat, I can hear you. Over. Oh, wow. Yeah. The voice sounds so cool. That's awesome. Brandon, what are you doing? That is satisfying.

I'm not doing anything. Do you want me to do the rest of the yak like this? Brandon, I need you to take Bogey 3 out. He's coming down the hallway right now. Over. Does he not know Blutman's bogey three? Who's bogey three? I don't know who bogey three is.

Oh no. Brandon got taken out. Brandon got taken out. Oh no. I'm not leaving without a walkie talkie. Oh shit. Oh shit. Someone.

Yeah. Who you sending? I'm on. Four, five, three, one. Go, go. We need eyes on Brandon. How does this work? Press the side button.

Oh, Kyle and Tech would never ever work. I'm in the lobby. He can't even do the tin can on a string. Yeah, we all got to, we all got to, I want one. He's all. I'm in the lobby. He can't even do the tin can on a string. Yeah, we all got to disperse. I want one. He's all the way over in the lobby now?

How did he get there so fast? Looks like I was right. I owe you the biggest of apologies. Yep. I was intimidated. Titus, do you have me? Yeah, I got you, big head. Wow.

That sounds so cool. This shit's on voice memos. Oh, no. Oh, no. People forget to hold the button. This line open. Remember to hold the button. Over.

I'm going upstairs to check if it works up there. Over. It just sounds so official. It makes your... Yeah. No matter what. These should be more... These are underrated. Yeah.

Also, the technology is astounding to me. What was that? I missed it. Over. Calgary, India. Over. Was that a Calgary, India? Over.

We had a Calgary, India. Over. Make sure you say over every time. Over. Over. Uh-oh, who's that? I don't know. Agent Book in route. Over. Hello there. Over. On. Uh oh who's that I don't know Yep

Open that box Is there more Oh There's Yeah there's I bought way too many Walkie talkies Yeah if you put it

On the same channel I'll be right back Oh my god Mook If you don't say over I will take away You're standing right where I am. Over. I'll be right back. Oh, my God. Moog, if you don't say over, I will take away your walkie-talkie privileges. Over. Got it, boss man. Over. I'm upstairs.

I see some sort of strange planet. Over. Oh, wait. These aren't. Brandon, can you rub Bogey's head over? Got it. Over. Look at that.

I'm taking a piss. Over. Fellas, I'm walking outside. I'm going to see how far I can go. Over. Kate, why don't you just keep going and just keep going? Over. See, they just test the distance.

I'm in, Angus. Over. This is amazing. Still pissing. Wait, what? Oh, we only have six? We only have six. No, I talk shit.

This is karma. Damn. Guys, I'm over half a block away. We got trash trucks and an Amazon truck. Over. Over half a block away? These things rock. Could we take these home?

What's the range of a walkie-talkie? Here, hold this into the mic. Okay. Is there a call button? Radio check. Hear loud and clear, Kate, over. Catch you, Kate, over. New seven-letter word for gecko or skink, over.

Away, over. Okay, give it to me. I just sent a text. Do you have a seven-letter word for gecko or skink? Over. Away. Over. Hey, give it to me. I just sent a text. That'd be reptile. Over. Shit, KB's phone. Oh, no.

Everyone's phone is... They don't need them. No, I was trying to get everyone to switch. Drop a brick. Over. Mook shouldn't be trusted with this. He's going to be yapping. I just texted everyone to switch to channel two, but I didn't text Mook shouldn't be trusted with this. He's going to be yapping. I just texted everyone to switch to channel two,

but I didn't text Mook. Kate, we're starting to lose you. You've got to come back over. Is she in danger? Big head, try and fart into it. I'm back here. Whoa, whoa. It's been done.

Over. Someone's hot on here. Over. I need one person to come back to the studio. Over. I got to try to fart. Over. We should do fart eliminated via walkie.

This is some great podcasting. This is good podcasting. I was going to try to fart in the walkie-talkie as well. Over. Oh, she's too far. You're too far away. Over. I'm watching Mikey Betts in a Frank the Tank meeting.

Should I go in there? Over. Yes, go in. Over. Bend. over. Radio check, can anyone hear me, over. Kate, come back or get off the channel, over. I don't think she can hear us.

Let's switch to channel two, please. Over. All of us or just Kate? Over. Just Kate. Switching to channel two. Over. I'm back.

Over. Move it up there. Are you on channel one or channel two? Are you channel one or channel two? Let's go to channel two. I'm going to two. How do you do that? Go to channel 2.

The big knob. Big knob. Yeah. All right, ready? Just turn it. It'll say it all out. That was fun, boys. Are you on?

Titus. Yeah. The microphone, I'm going to on? Titus. Yeah. The microphone, I'm going to try to fart in it. Over. Yep. Got it, Big Cat. Over.

Are you farting, Big Cat? I'm going to have to go to the bathroom. Over. Oh, no. Oh, no. Did you hear me piss? No, not at all. No?

Not the slightest bit, Mr. Dainty Stream. Oh. I farted, it was really faint, and then I dribbled a little bit on the front. We heard you say you pissed your pants a little, but no sound of fart. Whose voice was that? I think that's North. I don't think we're ever going to see Kyle again. Nah, he's gone. Actually, due east, you fucking moron.

Over. Almost certain it's north. If you look where the sun is right now, that's ridiculous. Over. Think about how the streets go, you fucking idiot. Over. Look out the goddamn window and look where the fucking sun is right now in the direction you're walking. Over.

I'm going to come beat your ass, you fucking bitch. Over. Big Cat, he's on the second floor, green room. Over. Beat his ass. Oh, he's getting scared. What's Brandon doing? We lost Kyle. He's gone. Kyle is gone. KB, where are you?

Over. He definitely... Over. Was that Big Cat? That KB... I don't know. Big Cat, I've been informed the direction we were arguing about is actually west and not east. Over. Did that part come through? Over. Was that Big Cat? I don't know.

No fart. Oh, damn it. I farted so good. Over. Kate said burger baron. Starting to think farting through a walkie-talkie is impossible. Over. Yeah, it didn't capture my piss either. I'm very disappointed.

Over. Over. Yeah, he tried farting again. Kate is apparently at the Burger Baron down the street. Over. There she is, yeah. It is, in fact, where it's not easy. Over. Set. street over there she is yeah any idea where Kyle is do you want to anybody want to order something on the

walkie-talkie not a single part all right I'm done with walkie-talkies you're done with them? Yeah the fact that we can't fart into them Yeah fart into them is brutal Let's do tin can on a string tomorrow Let's turn ours off and yak And see how long it takes for them to come back

Where's the power Oh she actually is at the burger bar She's been just talking on She might have just gone to get lunch. She's just talking on channel one. Yeah, that's right. We did switch channels. Whoops.

How'd you power off? Turned the knob to off. Fuck me. Thanks, Titus. Let's see. Let's see if Kate... So those are walkie-talkies. Thanks, Titus. So those are walkie-talkies. That's walkie-talkie.

Yeah, that was walkie-talkie. That's what we can do with walkie-talkies. I don't know what else we can do other than what we just did. Yeah, almost the two things you can do with them are in the name. Oh. Yeah. Oh. I like them. They're practical.

We could put one. I guess we could put one upstairs when we need to get somebody from upstairs. This is just like the buzzers that we got. One in the cave. It's the exact same thing. Yeah, they have to lean it on. Say, Malicek, get in here. You know what?

I'm going to say that probably, Nick, you were right. They're probably right about where they should be. No, the sound there's a charm there's a charm but then once you just do it for a couple minutes you're like okay so now what okay he's back if i had a like a little best friend growing up and we were like next to each other in homes and we were talking at night that'd be cool was that fun a bit. I think I lost you guys. Sure did. We switched to channel two. Yeah. How far did you go? Far outside.

We were trying to get a fart on it. It didn't work. Maybe the frequency. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. By the way, Father's Day merch is now available in the Barstool store. Ask for yours soon so you get it in time for the big day. It's store.barstoolsports.com.

Go right now. Father's Day merch is all there. There it is. Dad of the year. Hope you don't have a daughter with Will Compton. What is that? Somebody's got a call. Did y'all start picking up a different woman?

Yeah. What? There was a woman talking to Kate. What is going on? Uh-oh. Is that Kate's phone in her chair? Yes. Kate's phone.

That's annoying. That's her ringtone that's an awful brutal jesus uh brandon you couldn't have been more wrong you were wrong as well that's west i was there you said far east bathroom i said i'm walking to the far east walk to that bathroom i walked to that bathroom you're lying i watched you disappear into the bathroom i went to that bathroom i said there is a cleaning person there i'm going to the far east bathroom i didn't see you walking there we were arguing a different direction but you were saying north it's northwest east west it's it's southeast northwest no it is this is. This is due east. That's east. This is due west. Neither.

Chaps pulled out a compass and showed me. Why the fuck's it called a compass? Brandon, Chicago is built on a perfect grid. Chaps. What are you saying? Bring the compass. There's a map available. He turned it sideways.

All of our devices. He turned it sideways. We are on an east. What are you saying, though? He's saying this is north. No, no, no, no, no, no. That's not what I said. Which way?

I thought that way. That way is east. That way is west. That way is west. That way is east. We've done this exact thing. That way is west. It's on the streets.

The streets are. It couldn't be more easy. Okay. Well, now it's pointing up. That's the beauty of the layout. Chaps is a bad compass guy. Yeah, we did this. We did this.

So are we done forever with these? We did. Is this all we're going to get out of these? Yeah, probably. That was about it. That was fun. It was. It was fun for about five minutes.

Yeah. Terrible for the listeners. Yeah. We had fun, which is all that matters. Is Kate gone? Yeah. Like what McConaughey does. One for them, one for him.

The house was our mud. How different is your attitude if you get a fart through that thing? 100% different. Oh, yeah. This is the greatest invention of all time. I farted twice into it. You didn't get it over? No.

Oh, Kate's back with a hot dog. Kate, we have an issue. Yeah, this is a big deal. It's about you. Just sit there. I'll show you the issue. It's a really big deal. First of all, relax.

Just chill out. The next few minutes are going to be uncomfortable. If this is about the sex tape. Uh oh. No, let it play. Pat likes when I do that. Uh oh. Hello?

Do you not see the issue? Hey, big cat. Are you not seeing what the problem is? You're not really, this isn't coming through? Am I an idiot? What's happening right now? Well, your phone's ringing. Hello?

No, no, your phone's ringing. It's your phone. Yeah, I know, but. Just stare at her. You keep hanging up on me right why to do what did other people want hot dogs why would he keep well yes but hey sit down okay that is the worst ringtone of all time what the fuck is that makes me want to commit crime i feel like i'm at the bottom of the ocean i left my phone here and it was going on yes yeah we didn't know what it was like what is that we thought the walking

we thought we were in at war with a submarine. Yeah. Sorry about that. What's your fucking problem? Yeah, what is your problem? You have the choice of anything in the world. You live every day like this? Yeah. You just have that just going off? It's stressful.

Sonar in your fucking ear? It's very stressful when it goes off, yes. Then why? It doesn't have to. It got changed a while ago, and you know you get busy. No, no, no. Hold on. It got changed a while ago, and you know you get busy. No, no, no. Hold on. It got changed?

I don't know. People, my son maybe was fiddling. No, I'm sure he couldn't have figured that out. Yeah, you changed it. Well, how do you change it back? Were you like snapping along? You're like, oh, this isn't bad. Why did you pick that noise?

Why did you pick that? That's not default. Just say why you picked it. Come clean. I was probably trying to make my phone noise less loud and then i said you made it the most annoying noise but then maybe the baby was sleeping so i was like ah and then i just left it i don't know i'm sorry everyone yeah that's stressful that's stressful it's okay okay my bad no it's okay we just we were

very confused we didn't know what was happening i don't know how to change it. Sounds? It's like, that's a noise. Oh, it's bamboo. That's sick. Okay, that's the new one. Is there a wind chime one? That's the noise they make when, yeah, like you're. Iran just let off a nuke. That was a warning.

And we're just waiting for it to hit us. Or like a tsunami warning's going off. Yeah. Could you guys hear me the whole time? No, we switched channels to try to get a fart. Oh. We heard you for a while, but then it did get fuzzy. I could hear you guys all the way at Burger Baron. You could hear us? Yes, until you

switched it, I guess. Burger Baron, good. For a fart. Yes. I haven't been. It's pretty solid. It's legit. Yeah. Steven, what's up? We haven't heard from you all episode. How we doing? Okay, that's enough. Yep.

Oh, no. He almost made Nick quit before he got here. What? Oh, yeah. It was bad. I walked off. Why? Just I got annoyed real easy.

We were doing wordplay, and then he didn't pick up on it. What happened? Is there actually any way to play it back? That would be the best explanation. Yeah. It would hurt to watch. Wait, was it on the show? Yeah.

The two-word phrase, too short, came up. Nick said, oh, like the rapper. And then Big Cat or Brandon said, no, that's Eazy-E because he's a short man. And then Steven said, well, too short is a rapper too. Steve, thoughts? Playing back the tape? Not a good start, but hey, nowhere to go without. Set the bar low.

At least. What a horrible saying overachieve at least you had a banger of an other section what is the highest floor you've ever lived in an apartment i think this is a good actual conversation i hate living in a high floor kyle right now i'm on the 19th floor in our elevators down oh my god if you want to hire a shuttle to take you up you can what what do you mean i don't know want to hire a shuttle to take you up, you can. What? I don't know what that means. A shuttle? I don't know.

Is that just a big man named Shuttle? Or the stairs work. Walking down was whatever. What shuttle could possibly take you up there? I don't know. A man? All the elevators are down? Yeah, all four of them.

How? What? Is it just schedule maintenance it might they might be uh they might be good now but in the moment that i needed them i lived what's the highest i think i've lived on a 10th floor it sucks i've done 14 i hate living on a high three is the highest mints lives on 32nd right now what yeah that's crazy there's just something unsettling about not being able to get outside immediately yep i've never lived above two i know yeah three i think it was three i time no two ordinance right yeah i've never lived above two waiting to get out of your door or like forgetting something and having to go back up when you're in a rush is the worst yeah

it was like whenever i see those uh instagram videos from like billionaires row in Central Park. I don't I wouldn't want to live on the 70th floor. The richest should be at the first floor. Yeah. Steven, what's your answer? I think I was just talking about TJ. He lives on a very high floor. I think it's very cool to have that view.

It depends. Like, obviously, broken elevator. Let's not factor that in. But I think it would be cool to live on a high floor. All right. Let me try that again. Steven, what's the highest floor you've lived on? Oh, the highest I've lived on? Yeah, that's the highest.

Five? Okay. Walk up. Oh, that's not even a... That sucks. That's brutal. Yeah. Not the best, but...

What floor do you live on? 22. Woo! I think max is 32. Oh, God. Do you like it? I love it. Really? it I mean it doesn't bother me that much like I elevators we have six elevators so I like the view view is good I can see the water no yeah it'll be too high for a balcony I'd be afraid I would be afraid too my cousin had a super high balcony and when they would drink they would, look, they would like sit up on it, and I couldn't.

That's kind of cool. It killed my buzz immediately. I could not. I remember at Penn State, kids like going to the high rise, like whatever, and the kids would like scale the patios hammered drunk at one in the morning. Oh, no. I love those videos. The Russian dudes jumping around.

But they always die. Do they? Every time. I love those videos. How high did Dana live up with balcony bed? 17th, I think. Holy shit. That was the peak of Dana.

Been downhill. Yeah. Zillion beers? Yeah, that was his moment. Balcony bed. Yeah, but zillion beers led right into balcony bed. Yeah. He's never going to get back to that.

You can point to him. But that's why we have memories, Big Cat. Yeah, that never got, he's never going to get back to that. Like you can point to him. But that's why we have memories, big cat. Yeah, that's right. That's true. Balcony bed rocked. It was.

That's a, what a view. I mean, Chicago skyline. I can't get over it. I would pay extra to live high. It's pretty sick. It's a good skyline.

So good. Good skyline. Brandon, I believe you're making fun of my question. See, this is... It's an objectively bad question that did lead to a four- to five-minute discussion. That's what they all are. How long have you been on the show?

Now you're spiking the football here. Damn right. No. What are you doing? Somebody step in. You didn't score a touchdown. I forgot you're a hand it to the ref guy. What's?

He's doing too much. He's doing too much. He just says a word. What's going on? Feel disoriented. He could have walked off. Feel drunk. What just happened?

I don't know. He had the dub. J-Vortex yet again. Che Vortex, yet again. Trapped in it yet again. Sucked into the Che Vortex. What just happened? He just kept going. He's got your number right now.

I'm the only one he tries to have the number of. He could get more numbers. But he's got your number. He could get more numbers. But he's got your number. He could get more numbers. Che, get another number every now and then. Anybody can catch these hands. Oh. But they can't. Che, say literally anything.

Say literally anything. Say how awesome you are. I am awesome. And then keep it on Che. We might have missed it. He goes, catch these hands. That's just going to have a bouncy chair. Get them, Che.

And then he kind of like. Bounce, yeah. Yeah, come catch these hands. And he got his little. That's a pretty good one, huh? Yeah. I got to lean forward, then I got to lean back. He does, though, specifically have Brandon's number. I think we can all agree. I gotta lean forward then I gotta lean back he does though specifically

have Brandon's number I think we can all agree right now it's like I feel like the last ten times you guys have gone up against each other he's just but I never go up against him I'll say something innocent and he just goes BAM yeah BAM you just talked about how dumb my question was

I mean it was a dumb question but it leads to conversation. But that's what the other section is, right? The other section is you just putting a bunch of dumb questions out there.

I know, but you're kind of shitting on me for the questions, and that leads to conversation, which is the job. If you were in a band, what instrument would

you ideally play? Is it true that all bass players have giant hogs? That's a great one. That's a good one. Is it? No, almost certainly not.

Okay, I guess we got that to the bottom of that question. Bass players? Yeah. I think they have the biggest dicks in the band. They're not as showy. They don't need to overcompensate.

Yeah. What? Nothing. There's also a font question in the other section. Nick could answer that. Which band has the best font? Nick?

What? What band has the best font? I'm not falling for this. Why? I don't like the way Titus is laughing. I'm laughing at Brandon. He's over there pressed like Giles Corey. It's like... Stephen like Giles Corey. Yeah. It's like.

Stephen has Brandon's number. What? Stephen has Brandon's number. Oh, yeah? Like, he dominates Brandon every time. Yeah, we've been knowing that. Yeah. In fairness, I very much like Brandon. I've known Brandon for several years, and I feel comfortable.

We all know how long we've known each other. Even this is dominating. But that was a dumb explanation. Yeah, but he was patting you on the head. In fairness to Brandon, I like him. I just have to dominate him. I feel very comfortable talking to Brandon. We need to get you over on Che.

I don't need to get over on Che. You need to get one over on him. I'm fine. I don't know how, but we've got to figure out a way. Yeah, get Che. Get Che. Kick the fucking shit out of him. Get Che out a way. Yeah, get Che. Get Che. Get Che. Get physical. One-on-one basketball.

No. You would get him. No, I'd be out of breath immediately. Fish off. Maybe. Grill off. Has anyone sent you another grill uh no not yet okay what's your i know we're coming up to a weekend what's your move this weekend because i know you've been

shopping for grills on the weekend uh i'm actually going to mexico this weekend what what okay really yeah i'm out uh monday through wednesday next? Yeah. What are you doing in Mexico? Pina Coladas. You know what he's doing in Mexico. We all know what he's doing in Mexico. I would hate to be a pussy in Mexico next week. If you're a Mexican pussy, stay indoors. Try to climb that wall.

Yeah. Oh, they have headsets for these, too. Oh, that's official. That might be cool, because then we could look like security guards. But you still have to put it up to your mouth. Oh, wait. No, you don't. It has a mic in it?

Yes. Oh, that's cooler. Oh, that's when you hold the clip to your okay yeah you kyle get yours kyle hit me on but if you have headphones and we're not going to be able to i bet you could sneak in somewhere cool with that. If you look confident enough, that's the right outfit. Walk into Soldier Field. Yeah. During a bear scene. Uh-huh.

Do you hear it through the headphones? Power on. Cut. Breaker breaker one nine 19 can you hear me so if neither one is here oh you guys went to a different channel and they're both wearing headphones if the Yak listeners

could tune into Dave's Gwar video White Sox Dave's GWAR video, White Sox Dave, it's very funny, worth watching. Check that out. Did that just come out today? Yesterday, I believe. Are still backstage. I think it's a Rutledge joint, too.

That's where that dildo came from, right? That's where the big dildo came from, yeah. GWAR. What channel are they on? I got it on one. Big Cat, what channel? I think he's on one. Okay. Channel one.

That's what I used to watch in school in the mornings. What is it, Lisa Ling? Lisa Ling. Everybody had a little bit of a crush on her. Anderson Cooper, too. Maria Menounos. Oh. Channel one.

No way. Yes. Now this is cool. Yep. I'm just sitting at the door and it's like, hold on one second, sir. Oh. I've got to make sure that you can get in here. Hold it up closer to your mouth.

No, we can hear him just fine. I know, but I think it would look cooler. Oh. Yeah. Yeah, and then cover your mouth. Yeah, I got a Brandon Walker 6'4", 350 pounds. No. 6'5".

No chicks with him. 6'5", 275. Oh, I all want us to say that we're about four inches shorter than we are, so it makes Kyle like four feet tall. That's fine. I'm 5'8". Hello, can you hear me? I hear you, over. Yeah, this is the new thing. That's the new thing?

Oh wait Fart into that This could work. This line open. I'm trying to fart. Over. Did Kyle use this opportunity to just sneak out? I think so. Brandon, keep the walkie-talkie up by the microphone. I'm going into the bathroom to fart. Over.

I got it. Got it, big cat. Over. I just tried. Couldn't do it can fart again yeah I farted but it's not no noise

do your farts reek yeah Titus I'd like to apologize because I ripped a nasty one earlier did you smell it no I just smell a Kate hot dog okay alright yeah I'm sorry

I was basking in it it was an accident sorry my hot dog. Okay. All right. Yeah, I'm sorry. I was basking in it. It was an accident. Sorry, my hot dog smells. I'm afraid he just tried. I fear. Oh! We got it!

Got it! Got it loud and clear. That worked. That was perfect. That was great. That's good shit. That was good shit.ann. That was perfect. That was great. That's good shit. That was good shit. That was a textbook. Fart confirmed.

Over. Let's go. Over. It sounded sick, too. That was a good fart. Great work. Now come home, champ. Over.

It worked so well. Yes. It worked so well. Yep. home, champ. Over. It worked so well. It worked so well. We're back. And now the walkie-talkies are good again. Are they? Or are they just done now? Yeah, that might have

ended them forever. No, we could fart again. Yeah, you're right. You're right. Yes! Okay, yeah. You're right. You're right. You're right. Yes. Yes. Okay. Yeah. No, this is just the fart talkie.

I think it's actually just when you go to the bathroom, you just have to bring a walkie talkie with you to fart. Yep. That's it. Okay. If you want to leave during the show to go to the bathroom, you have to bring a walkie talkie. It's a fart.

You have to pay the toll which is one it's your bathroom pass one fart from the ass i love these walkie talkies they're all the way back i might buy more you know what i am yeah it's like a nice set yeah i'm like very industrial where did kb go so so it's so it's for you ladies and gentlemen we farted Like very industrial. Where did KB go? So, ladies and gentlemen, we farted. I think the other thing is we got to learn all the walkie-talkie like phrases and shit. That makes it better. Where we can talk in like almost code.

Yeah. That's where it comes in. Affirmative. Yeah, right. Well, you got to do the Alpha Bravo stuff, right? Alpha Bravo. Sharon. Charlie.

Charlie. Delta. Delta. Delta. Fox Trot. Echo. Tango. Let's. Oscar Mike is on the move.

Yeah. Let's keep line one open for all comms over yeah walkie talkie lingo oh hell yeah what's a breaker breaker quick bathroom break 10 1 10 1 10 2 is is that where one and two come oh number one oh. 10-3 is farting the mic. It is because it's skipped. Yeah. Is that where number one and number two came from? I love learning shit like that. That would be crazy. Going number two.

That has to be it. Some of this is crazy. Radio check. Number one or number two. Why would you have to specify? Flying in, peeing, kill. Yeah, let's kill these lights. Eyes on. Let's kill this Stephen Che. I'm going for a 10-2. Stand by, kill. Yeah, let's kill these lights. Let's kill this Stephen Che.

I'm going for a 10-2. Stand by. Over. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. Okay, you had to rip it on a walkie-talkie. Then 10-4.

What is 10-4? Yeah. 10-4 is yes. I understand what you're saying. Or I copy. Yeah. So 10-1, bathroom. 10-2, bathroom.

10-4 is, I get it. So they skipped 10-3. I think that's cum. It has to be. My Amazon buy again is the funniest. I just went to try to buy it. If you could narrow it down to what you buy between the hours of 12 and 10. Yeah.

Just scrolling right now. Drunk goggles. Yeah. 200 wiffle balls. You think we can guess one? Sure. Apple one. Sure. Apple juice. Yeah.

Is it two-piece 72-inch giant balloons? Yeah. 50 razor blades? That's your fault? You bought 50? 50. Zagnuts. Great purchase.

Fentanyl test strip for powders Wait what You bought that for Nick Safe man Different thing You bought a diabetic test kit as well Hold on a second Alright where in the fuck are the warped targets

Okay All right, where the fuck are the walkie-talkies? Okay. Do we want to just do a light show today? We did the walkie-talkies. We got a plan for tomorrow. Yeah, you're right. What should we do? Should we do it like... TJ, what's chat saying?

It said run a marathon as a team, but that will take a long time. No. No. No. No. Definitely not. Barred Eliminator. Let's plan it right now.

Let's figure it out. Barred Eliminator via walkie-talkie. We can make Mincy run another 10K. Let's use us. Yeah. Pictionary. Let's make it a... Let's use us. Yeah. Pictionary. That's pretty good. But only things that Stanko likes.

Like to pull from. Well, we could just lie about what he likes. But like movies that he likes or like things from that. Oh, we'll go to Stanko's Stance and get a list of everything. Highest rated movies. We could go to Stanko's Stance and... What's up, Peter? Peter. Hop on. The highest rated movies. We could go to Stanko's Stance and hop on. How do you think it's going to go tonight?

That's awesome. I think it'll be good. You think so? Have you talked to Mintz? Ben's really confident. Well, duh. You know him? That's the first thing you need as a comic.

I don't think he'll do as confident. Yeah, I don't think he'll do as well as Brandon did, though. That's definitely not the first thing you need, because Mincy would be the greatest comedian of all time. That's what he thinks, though. He told me to do it. He said he can do it, I can do it. So that's the premise here.

I was listening to you guys a little bit earlier, and I was laughing because I don't think if he's bombing he's gonna know that he's actually bombing definitely not definitely not and you told him to do the kramer uh but he didn't get what i said he had no idea he should do the kramer yeah because if he does it if he's like I'm about to do the Kramer That's not him He's quoting Right Quote Extension

Yeah he's So everyone Anyone else who wants to go You still got a couple tickets Laugh Factory tonight Mincy's Stand up How many minutes is he doing?

He said he's got something prepared He's gonna do do 7 to 10. I said, Mitzi, there's a light. You've got to look for the light. I'll show you where the light is if you want to keep going. He said 7 to 10? That's a long time. It was 5 to 7 this morning.

When people say they have 7 to 10, they could go 25 because they just don't have any idea. That's what Hank did. Also, 7 to 10 could also be 3 minutes. I don't think Mitzi's capable of 3. But also, 7 to 10 could also be three minutes. I don't think Mencius is capable of three minutes. No, definitely not. Where does this video live? Can we have it for tomorrow?

It's being recorded by the Laugh Factory and Austin. Yeah, we have Austin there and the Laugh Factory. We're going to need it turned around so tomorrow we can... Austin can turn it around. He'll have it for us. Just get it to TJ tomorrow because I have to see. Yeah'll have it for us yeah so just get it to TJ tomorrow because I gotta I have to see yeah

got it I have to see you want just his set or do you want him between just his well I guess anything he does anything like a super cut take notes mook you know what we want whatever he does that we want we want and there's no off button I mean it's live

but it's not being streamed which is good oh i mean that wouldn't that'd be illegal we can't stream that it would be you can't you can't no hell i don't know if this is he's going to treat it just like a conversation with us like is he going to talk about what he's going to do this weekend i get up there i get the sense that his set will be exactly like what he does when he corners one of us yeah it's it's going to do this weekend. I get the sense that his set will be exactly like what he does when he corners one of us. It's going to be story time, I think. So do you guys think he gets laughed?

He said he was going to bring Stella Blue on stage. I think he will. I think he'll get laughed. Like, Kate, you think he's going to murder? He's going to bring some coffee on stage? He said he was going to chug some Stella Blue. Bring it to the people. I almost want to talk to someone that bought a ticket and get what they bought it for.

Honestly, that would be great if we could get reactions afterwards, too, from filming. Just like, what did you think of Mincy? We could just look at the Laugh Factory Yelp afterwards. It drops a full star. Oh, yeah. True. And their Google reviews just totally drops.

Yeah. Can you give them motivation to go viral? He has a lot of motivation to go viral he has a lot of motivation for this set i'll say right now yeah if he goes viral then i'll give him a one one if anything goes viral on this from this set he gets a one extra day whenever you put in the bank i want some crowd work he he ran some of his viral plans by me for when he goes to the SEC baseball tournament. Okay. I think he's going to do it. I know.

We'll be seeing him because I think he's now trying to go viral, which is a death sentence for him. Right. Well, Big Cat, if you just back him more more for poker if you give him that carrot for going viral maybe he'll do something yeah i think i'm out on the poker thing i've thought about it more well the carrot is he gets to keep living life the way he wants to live it if he goes viral which is two hours well we let it we let big cat lets him go to new orleans or something say he goes to new orleans for a week okay and he'll say if you go viral today one million views you can stay there for an extra day if not you got to come home right my bad so basically buys his vacations so if he wanted

if he never wanted to come back he could do that he just has to stay viral every single day he sent a company-wide email yesterday that he found a breakfast spot yes what yes he did is it the fucking diner right next i don't know wait so reply at all mook sends out hey everybody like you know come to the show if anyone needs tickets mince sends an email to everybody like he like tags on to that one is like yeah what he said and then he sends a follow-up email and also i have found the ultimate fire breakfast spot about an eight minute walk from the office check out uncle mike's place and get the skirt steak and eggs but like is he doing that because he got it for free and he promised

he'd do that is exactly yeah uncle mike came out and talked to us without a doubt without a doubt and we all know how big of a lush i am this is an ad yeah yeah no that's an ad he just did an ad but it was a company yeah company wide email yeah, this is going to be a disaster tonight. I'm very excited. It is. It's going to be a disaster. I think he might feel something tonight he's never felt before. Shame?

Yep. No. I think he's going to do well. I think, like, you asked if people are going to love it. Yeah. People are going to be tickled to experience it in person, that cornered-in-the-office feeling. Like, they want, I think they want to experience it. Ooh, interesting. Yeah. I think they want to experience it. But none of us are tickled to experience it in person. That cornered in the office feeling. I think they want to experience it.

Oh, interesting. Yeah. None of us are tickled. If they are as initiated as we are with him. But if they're just fans of what it's going to be. That's a good point, Kyle. I think it's going to be like 80-20, Barstool. Okay, so he might bring the house down.

What if he kills and we all bomb? Then I will literally kill and bomb. Oh, my God. What if this is the start of an incredible comedy career? For Mincy. For Mincy. Oh, my God. It's just like all of a sudden he's selling out MSG.

Netflix presents. I wouldn't put it past him. Oh, he can do it. I wouldn't put it past him the guy is like he does the most remarkable things without ever having any talent is that the word he like just

everything he does is inspiring right it's like radio or fucking Forrest Gump Forrest Gump that's so good oh man yeah he just lives his life like the the kid who put his hand up at your game last night yeah that's him yeah perfect there's opportunities just he just goes yeah and then opportunities goes right in his glove he's least expected top 10 play of the week and then he's just like did i do am i a great catcher of balls yes i am the ball finds him yeah the ball does find him oh man all right so all right so

we do we have any idea what we're gonna do tomorrow do we want to do draft not draft we'll figure out the stanko thing because we want to have a good idea we want to make sure we we do does stanko have any ideas that he would we probably could involve Stanko. We could ask him if he has any ideas. He's a Yak fan. He knows what he likes to see. And you're going to review the tapes. Oh, yeah. The Mitzi docuseries.

You said, Nick, we could do a wheel and it's like every certain amount of money we spin it. But what would be on the wheel uh stanko based challenges and games okay all right so let's think of those okay i think that's the easiest way to do it i like that i like that and and maybe even we don't do i don't want to pressure people into giving money so maybe we just do like uh every 15 minutes we spin oh so stanko followed mints around for a full hour. When you spin the wheel at the very beginning,

somebody's got to follow Mince that entire hour. Yep. Yep, they do. With the walkie-talkie. And just weigh in every now and then. And with the camera held up the whole time. Someone's got to fall off their bike? Yep.

Someone's got to fall off their bike until they break their arm? Yeah. Yeah. Just over and over and over. Do we have a ramp? A bike ramp? We could probably get one. I used to go off those.

Me too. The X Factor? Hell yes. I went through a BMX Harrow bike phase. You got a ramp over somebody? Like the wheel spins and you got to either lay down. Oh! Alright, Kate, you're on the wheel spins and you gotta either lay down or... All right, Kate,

you're on the wheel too. I can't, but you guys are absolutely doing it. Hold on. As soon as you're back on the wheel for shit,

the challenges are gonna go from that to like, somebody has to take a bite of carrot cake. I think we need a ramp tomorrow. Yeah. I would love a ramp.

That sounds awesome. I wanna see this. I would love a ramp. We need a ramp. I think more than one person. I think like need a ramp tomorrow. Yeah. I would love a ramp. That sounds awesome. I want to see this. I would love a ramp. We need a ramp. I think more than one person. I think we'll stuff the ramp. We need a helmet. We need a helmet, though.

Someone jumps over two or three people. Yeah. You need a helmet for sure. Yeah. Do we? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yes.

No. It's just our brains. We could do some type of movie ranking guesser. Ooh. So he has that whole spreadsheet yeah for how many stars away you are you have to like take a shot something of that sort yes we getting tanked I was kind of thinking

I know I was kind of thinking about also for each amount we hit because somebody floated the idea of we each bring a different shot in oh yeah yeah and like that's part of it. Stanko shot day? It's Friday.

Shots? Shanko. Yeah, you can play the Rotten Tomatoes game. Just name a movie. But Stanko's stance. Yeah. Does he do a letter rating, though? He does.

Yep. So what about we say a GPA, and then you have to pick out movies you think would meet that gpa i like doing the right yeah the is the rotten tape what's the rotten tomatoes game uh that's you name a movie and you have to just say the yeah you just name two movies you have to say what's higher ranked or, like, maybe... Yeah, what was it?

I forget what it was. Jeff D. Lowe knows it. Oh, because you could do a... I think maybe we could do a game where it's, like, we go, like, higher or lower. It's, like, you have to... We'll have a deck of cards,

higher or lower. It's, like, you name a movie and then if it's lower, you have to figure out... You have to name one that's lower. That's cool. Get destroyed on that game. Keep going.

I don't know any movies You're fucked Alright we're going to come up with something fun I like this We're going to work out something fun It's going to be Stanko's day tomorrow We'll have him call in Okay let's spin the wheel We got a bad wheel

High noon Roof ball house Oh yeah roof ball We got it High Noon. Roofball House. Oh, yeah. Roofball. We got it. We got it. Locked in.

Locked in. So, Roofball is going to be on May 30th. We're going to be doing. Thursday, I think. Two weeks from today. Yep. And this is an official regional Roofball game. So, this is how we qualify.

This is how we qualify. Or just get sent there for no sent there Is it just us? I think we can Add some people Okay I think I'm making my debut You're making your debut? Yeah I think

Well actually It could be just us But we We have to have Max Yeah He was a star Jerry Jerry was in it

So yeah we'll just do We had Tommy Smokes Last time we crushed So who's the Tommy Smokes equivalent here? Nikki? Nikki? Randy? We have to, like, there has to be groups of three, right?

So make sure we're on multiples of three. All right. We can talk about roster office. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We don't want to make it so big that it takes forever, but we'll have some other people. Yeah. High Noon.

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Guess. It's in the thousands. Guess. Thousands? 700. 2,000. 3,032. Holy shit.

I knew it was a lot. I would not have guessed there's that many movies. Yeah. 3,032. There's only like 600 movies, right? So you must have done several of them multiple times

how many do you think you've watched in your lifetime I've seen over 240 of them oh you do you log every one no I'm probably

I have sometimes thought 240 is not that much yeah I have set it's an office it's an office quote tried to come up with

I tried tried to write down all the movies I'll explain thank you what he was doing there was he was oh It's an office quote. I tried to write down all the movies. I'll explain. What he was doing there was he was doing Dwight Schrute lines to the room. It was working fine.

Nick was very confused. Nick was confused. 3% of the audience was pleased. That's my 3%. I like that. I got my 3%ers out there. They hear my jokes.

What? My 3%ers. Is that bad? It's a motorcycle thing, Brandon. 4%ers. No, you're 3%ers. You're going to get a tattoo? 5%ers?

I don't have 5%. You don't know what 3%ers are? I don't. I'm pretty sure it was like that white nationalist. Potter. Yeah, that's what I meant. What's up, Potter? He just said he's doing a set tonight.

Oh, no shit. Oh, hell yeah. Oh, you're in? I'm supposed to promote it, but go ahead. Oh, shit. You just told me that. Uh-oh. You just said it?

Yeah, I was kidding. All right, it might be special guest. That was a joke. All right, so Potter's going to be here tomorrow. Tomorrow for the show, yeah. All right, spin the wheel. Let's end the show. Potter, you running the gauntlet tomorrow?

I'll do it, dude. Without your glasses, though. We don't love glasses. Hey, I can do a lot of things. Okay. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, fuck.

Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Slippery, slippery, slippery. Oh, God. God damn it. And wait, technically the whole office is on because of the walkie talkies No, but Bader's on Potter's on

Potter hasn't stepped through the threshold yet Potter, come here for a second No, don't listen Come here Yeah, yeah, come here Yeah, he's got his He's a gambling man He's got his luggage here

He's fallen in a moat He's fallen in a moat. He's got his luggage. Yeah, he's fallen. He's fallen in a moat before. He always end up wet. I said we have a bad view. This is bad. We need to get out of this. Good to see you, bud.

How are you? What's up, man? How's it going? Yeah. Just a walkie-talkie, yeah. Yeah, we got walkie-talkies today. Wait, do you think those are sweet? I mean, they could be

i don't know are they not well uh i farted into one not that one but it sounded sick it was oh that'd be a cool sound yeah fuck yeah it was i got a question for you potter yeah you dm me on instagram asking you you you're here like i'm here. Well, I just, I literally just got here. But you're friends with Nick and KB. Why don't you just ask them? I did. And what'd they say? Well, he's going to a wedding or something. You're not here tomorrow? I'm not here tomorrow. Oh my God, I'm not.

What the fuck? Yeah, I got a bachelor party. You just forgot? I did. Yeah. But yes, you're obviously welcome. You here tomorrow thank you yeah i can't wait yeah what did you do that for kb i know i also signed up for the beer pong tournament on sunday shit shit geez there's so much shit going on you're the counter gets 300 bucks and i'm taking it home

right into it. Yeah. I guess I could. You're not here for Stanko Day? I'm not. Ooh. So you want him to die? Stop.

Well, you would be here otherwise. I know. I guess I do. That was easy. Jesus Christ. Come on. I'll donate crazy is it a dickens i'll donate donate like doubt it yeah like an oil baron oil barons i don't think donate in north dakota donate like mincey talking to a new intern is it someone close to you who's bachelor party yeah it's my best man. Or I'm the best man. Wait, is this your bachelor party? Wait. God damn second. Wait, is this yours? I would do that.

Oh yeah. Yeah, you would do that. Like shit, I got my bachelor party. So wait, you're a best man? I am. How do you feel about giving a speech? Fine. Yeah? I'm just worried it will be too mean maybe. No. Like he's the type of dude that I would feel very uncomfortable saying something sweet.

Well, he was very addicted to Percocet. Yeah, so I got to toe the line between roast. No, you could be mean. Definitely. Everybody knows about his Percocet tattoo. You guys? Derek Taylor, yes. You could be mean.

A little mean, yeah. I'm excited. Is the maid of honor, do you know the maid of honor? I do. We've been out a few times. Is she funny? She's going to get sentimental. She's got some chops, yeah.

Okay. Because as long as you are going to be funnier than the maid of honor, then you'll be fine. Oh, I donnier Than the maid of honor Then you'll be fine Oh the maid I don't know the maid of honor Oh Keep forgetting what that means I feel like I'm having

A different conversation Yeah I'm out of it I'm out of it Are you gonna go first So you can bury her though Yeah Oh yeah like I don't know how

I'm gonna follow that Yeah you gotta bury her ass You do have to bury her ass Have you given one Have you boys given one I've given one You gotta bury her I have yeah

I let the girl go first I was gentle I the girl go first. I was gentle. I was like, go first because there's no chance. That was gentle. And did you? No, yeah. I let her go first, and then she was like, thank you. But did you say it?

You have no chance? I said you have no chance. Yeah. That's the best. The rules. Just whisper in her ear Before she goes up there You're fucked Get ready to bomb

At this wedding You knew it already Shit Bitch Alright spin the wheel This sucks This is This is two in one week

I'm excited I haven't slept This will wake me up There we go There it is What was the You haven't slept He This will wake me up. There we go. There it is. What was the... You haven't slept? He doesn't sleep.

He doesn't sleep or eat, but we can get to that tomorrow. I don't think I've ever heard anyone say, I haven't slept, and then just end it there. No, he's correct. I had a set at the Comedy Store, and then I had a 6 a.m. flight, so I just went straight to the airport, and then I came here. All right, so you have not slept. Yeah, not at all. It's going to be me.

It's going to be me. It's always be me it's always me it's always been literally every time fucking time Oh every fucking time every wheel told you oh I think it's gonna be me. No, it's gonna be me. Potter's gonna drown in the shower. They gotta be nice showers, right? That's three in a row. No. I'm fucked.

Somebody else say it. Somebody else say it. It's going to be me. It's too late. It's way too late. It's way too late. And you didn't mean it. Yeah, it's disingenuous. And you're still up there.

This is no way. Oh, no way. A guest in the final four. This is no way to treat your guest. Yeah. Oh, no way. A guest in the final four. No way to treat your guest. You've been here for one minute. Oh, he's good. There you go, Peter. Thank you.

I just landed. I do have airport stink on me. Okay. Do we have soap? Potter did an actual shower here. All right, KB versus Potter. Oh, my God. Oh, this is so good.

And you know the piss rule, too? I'm so glad I have my luggage. What's the piss? If you get swept, you have to piss your pants. What does that mean, swept? 4-0. It's the best of seven in the final. Oh, I didn't realize.

Yeah, yeah. So you want to get four before the other person. Oh, my God. I actually have a, like, it's not a phobia. I am literally unable to piss in public. Do you want me to block you? There's a podcast called Scissor Bros where I lost a bet and had to piss myself on the air. We stood there for an hour.

To get piss out? I couldn't pee. We'll get it out of here. Oh, yeah. We'll squeeze it out of your eyes. Here we go. God. Give me one more. One. Here we go. God. Now, if the wheel is just, it would be KB for not telling us he's going to be here tomorrow.

Yeah, that's the last second. But he didn't do it intentionally. No. You didn't have the slightest of clues. I'm up 1-0 in this game. You're up 1-0. No, it's 1-0. It's 1-0.

So there's no piss. Piss is off the table. It's off the table. Off the table. Oh, good. I'd rather no piss. Piss is off the table. Off the table. Oh, good. I'd rather not piss. Let's go. One.

Oh, KP. Let's go. Three-one. Kyle, start taking your shoes off. Dominating. You're done. It's over. I don't want to drop it, though. No, start taking your shoes off. I'm dominating you. You're done. It's over. I don't want to drop it, though.

No, it's over, dude. Celebrate. It's karma for Kyle. Oh, 3-2. He started taking his shoes off. Changed the tie. No, it's done, man. You're staying dry.

Come on. There it is. Yep. Oh, that was alright. I'm glad I came down to the wire though. That was electric. KB gets wet like once a week.

Yeah. It's crazy. I feel like they're stats. Someone has to have advanced analytics on. I've never been wet in this office. Same. But it's always me somehow. Every single time. Every time. I guess that's why I this office. Same. But it's always me somehow. Every single time. I guess yeah that's why I'm not worried about it because it's you.

It's quite the paradox. It's always me. The in between office here. Oh I see. Yeah. And that was just with bottled water. Has anyone done all the showers? Can you like power rank which showers? Well this is the only we only have one shower here. Nobody can shit in New York. york no new york this one's better than new york we

didn't have one at the temporary temporary office we didn't have one this one's way better than new york super all weeks we've had pools which are nice great um yeah this one we did have yeah we had a camera and uh i didn't think it through la might have been yeah like the first like week we were here big t was like he came in he's like why is there a camera like it was after he showered he looked up there's a camera and i went and i was like i asked the tech guys i was like that doesn't that's that feed isn't live and they were like no no it is it was like a cartoon though because like T, it was all covered with bubbles. And then when he noticed the camera, the last bubble popped.

It was incredible. We got that out of there. That was a big, yeah. Honestly, they installed that no questions. Yeah, they did. And I don't even, I think it's whether they installed the no questions or the fact that when Pete said, do you want a camera in there? I said, yes, no question. That's probably the biggest problem.

We thought it was just for. Yeah. Yeah. But then there is a bit outside of the wet. Right. But a lot of people shower in there. Damn. Like basketball players.

Yeah. Yeah. Like the draft guys have come through the last week and they've been showering in there. Imagine if we had gotten just all these guys in the draft on camera. I mean, we could have helped their draft stock. We also could have gotten extortion money out of like crazy. Yes. A lot. Fuck, now I'm actually

being, I'm mad we took the camera out. You should put cameras above the sinks to see who washes their hands after they go to the bathroom. Nope. Nobody does. Nobody does. I don't. Those won't be getting any action. Might as well be a photograph. Oh, man. Poor KB not. Yeah.

I can't believe he did that to us. That was crazy. He just didn't even. How do you not know? He's going to bet ponies. Oh, yeah. He's going to Preakness. Oh, he did tell.

But then he forgot. Who's he going to Preakness with? It's his bachelor party. It's his bachelor party. Moresh. That's right. They said that last Friday. They're. Who's he going to Preakness with? It's his bachelor party. It's his bachelor party. Moresh. That's right. They said that last Friday. They're like, we're going to Preakness.

We played the video, everything. Yeah, he did tell me like earlier in the week. I guess I know more than you. Oh, yeah. I'm out next Wednesday. Potter, you also fucked up using KB as a point of contact. I guess. He's the most unreliable up using KB as a point of contact. I guess. He's the most unreliable. He's always been my point of contact.

Yeah, I'll text you so you have my number now so that you don't have to rely on KB. It hasn't gone awry. That's true. You got here. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Did you have a hard time getting in or did you say you're here for Kyle? No, I ripped a cig and waited for Kyle to pick me up at the door. He said he'll meet me at the door.

Okay. I wasn't in a rush. Where are you at this weekend? There he is. Oh, my word. That is wet. You're so good at it, dude. You're the best.

You're the best at it. By the way, you're off the hook. We forgot that last Friday, you and Maresh said you were going to Preakness. We played the video. Yeah, you guys knew, but I forgot in the moment. Right, but I but you, yeah, we knew. Yeah, and I've done a lot for you guys, and I've done

a lot, showed up a lot. You do? I do think since we've been on YouTube, you have the most appearances. I know, you do. I do, yeah. You're Cal Ripken. Yeah.

Yeah. Like 500. Maybe more. That's so many. Yeah. You do look natural wet. Like natural, yeah. Yeah, like you just like, it was like, I wouldn't even notice you were wet. Not even creatine.

It's almost like you wore clothes to get wet. It fits the body well. You're not a wet guy, Potter? I like a shower. I don't know if I'm getting... Do you? Oh, I love a shower. You have no idea.

Come smell me. I smell good. You said you smell like airport. I know. I got off a plane, but I bet I still am fresh. Are you a cologne guy? I do a little bit. Come on.

All right. I want to sniff, too. This is not me optimum. Oh, he's right. He's a cologne guy? I do a little bit. Come on. All right. I want to sniff too. This is not me optimum. Oh, he's right. He's a good smell guy. He's a good smell guy. This is not even optimum. This is Comedy Store, Airport.

Yeah, that's a good smell for that, for that gauntlet. Yeah. And you're a cigarette guy. I smoke cigs, yeah. I smelled it. Yeah, they're on there a little bit, but that adds to it a little bit. But yeah, the cologne cigarette smell is actually kind of like a little sexy. Yeah, it's something.

It's my childhood. It's like an old school, yeah, like wood or something. Yeah, like Rat Pack-y, like Sam Davis Jr., Frank Sinatra. That's what I think of when I look at you. Yeah, he's right in the Rat Pack. Suits and games I think of Don Rickles right when I look at you alright we'll see everyone tomorrow Potter will be here

good job getting wet subscribe We'll be right back. See you tomorrow. Bye. Have fun at the Comedy Store tonight if you're there. Love ya. Bye.