The Yak - We Get to the Bottom of the Latest Barstool Beef | The Yak 1-30-24
Episode Date: January 30, 2024Happy Birthday Big CatYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...
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Hey, Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube.
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It's the Yak.
Hello.
Welcome in.
It's the Yak.
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20% off. Who's on the simulator hey no golf
i think that worked that was hank yeah he's trying to get one more shot in we sing it or what
no no no no no Happy birthday to you. Arian, I always think he's a cha-cha-cha guy.
To you.
Stevie Wonder one.
Yes.
Happy birthday.
That should be it.
That should be the birthday song.
We're all doing our, what's all this?
Happy birthday.
Yeah, we just stopped?
Was there another one?
What's the one waiters and waitresses do?
Happy, happy birthday.
Happy, happy birthday.
We're all in this together.
Happy, happy birthday. I think that's the Hava Nagila.
What?
You say it's your birthday.
Which one's that? Oh, yeah.
That's just a song.
They play on Friday mornings on radio, right?
Is birthday a genre of music?
Yeah.
I like it.
Arian's here, by the way.
Hello, Arian.
Shout out, Arian.
There needs to be more.
He's here.
It is my birthday i had
a very morbid thought that i'd like to share with everyone that'd be nice happy birthday i'm 39
sucks whatever uh i don't want it to happen today but i think i want to die on my birthday yeah
i think it'd be fucking cool like that would be very cool if i died on my birthday yeah it'd be
like a nice, even life.
And, like, people would stop at your grave and be like, oh, damn.
That's pretty cool.
He died on his birthday.
Easy math.
Yeah.
Figure out how old you were.
It's real sad when it's the same year.
Yeah.
But other than that.
Yep, yep.
That's true, but I think I officially would like to declare I'd like to die on my birthday.
Yeah, I get it.
Again, I don't want it to be today.
Not today.
Don't want it to be today.
My life is great. It's awesome. What if you died day after? Suck Again, I don't want it to be today. Don't want it to be today. My life is great.
It's awesome. What if you died day after?
Suck. That's probably the worst way to go out.
Yeah.
That would suck. Extra day on there.
I'd rather die real gruesomely on my birthday
than peacefully the day after.
But what would suck? How would it suck?
I don't know. You were just there.
You could have done it yesterday. You're dead. What sucks?
Jesus, man. No, he's done it yesterday? You're dead. What sucks? Jesus, man.
No, he's right.
He's right.
I had the same thought.
That's a silver lining.
You're fucking dead.
It's done over.
That was like when Max, when we were going to New York last weekend, and Max said to me,
I hope you have a really safe flight.
Oh.
And I was like, well, that means you want us to crash.
And I had to explain to him.
I was like, if we crash, I'm dead.
I don't care.
Your life sucks now because you don't have anything without me.
That is one of the weirder things.
That's the worst case scenario.
I was like, dude, you have no skills without us.
I was like, memes can get a job.
Jake can get a job.
You can't.
But, I mean, saying really safe flight is...
Really.
You're rooting for that.
That's one of the weirder things we do that's acceptable.
I think Max just gets buried with you, like when a pharaoh dies.
Well, yeah, I told him.
I was like, I am now going to tape a video that I will send to someone that just is like,
if I die on this plane, do not hire Max.
I'm going to get destroyed.
I called the pharaoh.
It's not his crew.
It was his slaves.
Oh, yeah.
Not his crew.
Oh.
Yeah. Yeah. That pharaoh.'s not his crew It was his slaves Oh yeah Not his crew Oh yeah Yeah
That pharaoh
Not a good guy
Ugly
King Tut
Yeah he was ugly
How do
How do you know
How do you know
Oh come
King Tut is
He was 10
He was old club footed
He was cute
He was a soft
I don't know
He was a soft four
How about how do we know this
King Tut's a two
It's like pictures
They rebuild him
Yeah they rebuilt him He had a club foot So like you're kind of at the we know this? King Tut's a two. It's like pictures and like digital creations. They rebuilt him. Yeah, they rebuilt him.
He had a club foot.
So like you're kind of at the-
Oh, no.
That's a filter.
That's not a terrible one.
No, they rebuilt him.
Jada Pinkett Smith.
They rebuilt him and he looked so bad.
This is what I'm saying.
Like you're kind of at the whim of the digital creator.
No, no, no.
But they rebuilt him not on AI.
Oh, that one's not good.
I'm looking at like six different kids.
That one's bad.
That one's bad.
He's ugly there. Say you think he's cute, man. Look at him. Look at that. Look, that one's not good. I'm looking at like six different cats. That one's bad. He's ugly there.
Say you think he's cute, man.
Look at him. Look at that.
Look at that knee.
Knock-kneed.
He was like 19, too, so he didn't even get a chance
to glow up.
He was clubfoot.
I thought he was clubfoot.
I could be wrong about that.
King Tut.
Amazing face. That Tut. Amazing face.
No.
That's a bad face.
No, dude.
I think y'all kind of hating on him.
Ugly.
He pulled, though, right?
He's not bad as y'all making him seem.
A four is.
You think he's above a four?
I don't know if he pulled.
I think he was 12.
They didn't have dental hygiene like that back then.
He forced it.
He pulled his thing, man.
He died when he was 12?
He Vince McMahon pulled.
Yes.
Yeah.
When did he die?
Like, yeah, literally.
Yeah. When did he die? Like, it was somewhere close 19 oh oh open the atlas that book is that at 19
what are you doing with this book it's bigger than we have to bring it up now nick got it for
me for my birthday oh incredible yeah that's pretty weaponizing my autism
that type of shit.
Fellas can't have interests anymore
without getting
a husband and a wife, man.
You are autistic, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
Are you really?
No, that's the thing.
But I've been brainwashed
into thinking that I actually am.
You got gas lit.
Honestly, yeah. I go through phases where I'm like, wait, into thinking that I actually am. You got gas lit. Honestly, yeah.
I go through phases where I'm like, wait, fuck.
Yeah, I guess.
You have some specific interests and likes that are unique to you.
Like a good memory.
Back in the day, that would make a man interesting.
Now, it's like a scarlet letter.
Same letter.
You say too much.
Give me an interest that's obscure.
Honestly, nothing is obscure.
All right.
Pull up the dozen.
High school regions.
Yes.
Yeah, yeah.
He memorized NFL skill position player hometowns.
Did you wrestle in high school?
Nah.
Okay.
Let me think.
What else?
You can name every school district in Pennsylvania.
No, I cannot.
You beat Fran at bachelor hometowns.
Yeah. Yeah. I like cities.
What's your favorite city?
I don't know.
Prince Edward?
I don't like traveling to cities as much as I like just knowing them.
Okay.
Yeah.
What's the most obscure city you know of?
You're fucking up right now. You said you now you said you don't have a favorite what's the one with the northernmost football field high school football for alaska it has a
weird illusion what about the one in western pa that has the fire underground centralia it's dead
what about the city you made carlsberg eisen Eisenhower, Somerdale, Tiltsville.
You made all these?
Fulton, Renaissance, Vexen, Sun Valley, Eco Park.
What do you mean you made these?
It's a state that I made in my head.
Yeah.
Okay.
We talk about this state a lot.
New Plattsburgh.
New Plattson.
What's the best city in this state?
Sapphire Island Okay that sounds good
What's the state flower?
I don't do that shit
Maybe you can take over
Maybe you can cover the flowers
That shit's lame
Why'd you ruin it?
First question man
Sorry I couldn't answer your questions off the top.
That's okay, man.
Obscure cities, they're obscure.
So I don't know.
I can't think of the most obscure.
I feel like that was kind of your...
No, that was.
I fucked it up.
I got nervous.
Yeah.
So I don't...
Obviously, yesterday, Barstool Radio got canceled.
Kirk, Dave, and Whitney are doing a new show.
I don't want the yak to get canceled so
there's some beef
yeah i think so i do you know the story the beef was that pent up oh yeah there was some beef
i've been the i've i've taken the high road for long enough, yeah. Came to an end.
Yeah, it came to an end.
It just came out, yeah.
So where are you guys at?
Have you talked to Big Ev?
No, no, I don't know.
TJ, as a producer of the show, explain the beef.
When we were moving to Chicago,
we planned on doing mostly sports as part of the move.
We picked a time slot that was open, cleared it with everybody,
and Brendan and Mark had that in their plans when they chose what they were doing
when they were moving to Chicago.
And then Barstool Radio came back, and they didn't want to go later in the day,
so they picked the time slot Pick Central was already in, and Pick Central didn't want to go later in the day, so they picked the time slot Pick Central was already in,
and Pick Central didn't want to go later in the day,
so they picked the time slot we were already in,
which we took issue to.
There was one of the case races had a big issue between Brandon and Rico about that.
Right.
I remember that.
And we ended up conceding, and everybody said that let's –
We didn't end up conceding.
I mean, like I did, but Brandon was the bigger person because Brandon is a nice guy and has a relationship with those guys.
And so, yeah, Brandon, Brandon, like was just a peacemaker about it all.
And Brandon was like, I don't want any conflict.
If they have a problem with the time slot, we'll move the time slot.
Now, this was a problem.
I was upset on Brandon's behalf because Brandon bought a house in Wisconsin.
Yep.
With the understanding that he would have enough time in the morning to get here. problem i was upset on brandon's behalf because brandon bought a house in wisconsin yep with the
understanding that he would have enough time in the morning to get here but now they were carving
an hour into his arrival time and now he has to go at rush hour instead of waiting after rush hour
and it was a whole thing and then brandon was brandon was like fine i don't care i'll be a
peacemaker and i was mad on brandon's behalf but then he he talked me off a ledge which is why i
never brought it up and then it got brought up today because uh towards the end of the show
uh tj told us that dave and wit and kirk are bringing back barstool radio at 11 30 eastern
right and then brandon or somehow got brought up about the time slot and then i just like
use that as an opportunity to be like i i'm sure the pick central guys are going to have a huge problem with that and demand that they move the show like they did for us
and uh you know i got carried the only thing i regret is saying fuck those guys
but otherwise everything else was literally fact they know it's fact which is why
they they couldn't really refute any of it and that's not really it was less of a beef and more
of just like a me getting it off my chest that they they
they looked down on when we tried to launch mostly sports they looked down on us they were like we
are a bigger show than you um they were talking about numbers not from everybody on the not from
everybody on the show but there was talk about numbers okay from people on the show okay and i
just thought it might be time to revisit those numbers now talk about that now you i saw your
clip and then i watched the other one.
I'm just guessing here.
I don't think Big Evan and Marty like you.
Yeah, Big Ev.
I don't think those guys like you. Yeah, I don't think so either.
It felt like both sides were just letting some stuff off their chest.
Brandon, are you just staying out?
Brandon, you were on the phone hooting and hollering loud as can be.
I went to the bathroom where everybody goes to shit.
I feel bad about putting Brandon in the spot.
Who'd you call?
I called nobody.
That fucking idiot up in Massachusetts, Kirk, on his show called me.
And he's like, what's your beef with Pick Central and Time Slides?
I'm like, you fucking idiot.
He's doing his job.
He is doing his job.
What did he call me?
Was he mean to you?
No, I've just yelled.
That's how he was yelling.
Oh, my God.
But we were just going back and forth.
And, yeah, this is one. Yeah, Brandon, stay've just yelled. That's how I'm feeling. Oh, my God. But we were just going back and forth. And, yeah, this is one.
Yeah, Brandon, stay out of it.
I don't like that.
I have a question.
So are you going to go on Pick Central tomorrow?
No, of course not.
Why not?
Because I don't.
Like, why would I go on Pick Central?
I said what needed to be said.
Should we have Big Ev on here to at least hash it out?
I guess.
I mean, I guess, yeah.
TJ, I wanted to just either.
I don't't have a to
be completely honest like big ev took that way too like big ev is if i was making a power rankings
of like the guys on the show that i have a problem with big ev was not even that high up but then now
big ev decided to take it very personal what did he do to me yeah what did he do yeah like he didn't
do it like after after the clip he just like went scorched earth on me but oh yeah what did he do yeah like he didn't do it like after after the clip he just like went
scorched earth on me but oh yeah he did he was just like i don't like bags yeah yeah but i old
douchebags no just for him not me and marty was probably the fuck those guys that got him the most
yeah but i that's what i mean i regret that part it's like big ev i don't really he he was i it
wasn't even really about him he's just on the show and we did have that
problem with the show but whatever so where's it where's this go from here yeah i'm curious that
because like it felt like it was it just felt like there was a lot of hate and then i i know
you and marty have not like because that was before you even came to barstool because there
was the clip of like when marty and Jake did a show being like.
Right, right.
And Marty was talking all that shit about me.
Right.
So that made sense.
Not everyone has to like each other.
But it doesn't make sense because people, if you watch Marty today,
he was like, I've been nothing but nice to Titus.
And I've tried to talk to him.
There was pre-existing beef.
It's not true.
So TJ, how do we squash it?
Or do we not squash it?
I've squashed it from my end.
I don't care.
I just got it off my chest, and we kept moving, and that's that.
Brandon, do you want it squashed?
Do you want me to try it?
I actually have a zucchini squash.
Why do you have a zucchini squash?
In case the dick needs a little work.
What?
Just in case the bulge needs a little work.
Oh, nice.
A little dick work, yeah.
But I just ruined it, so.
Why'd you ruin it? Oh. No. I can i can still try it no it'll be all no the kyle i know would have two zucchini squashes and you
leave that one on the table yeah yeah rico was very silent in that clip he left he left the room
oh i think he didn't want to change time slots But I thought this was all dead and buried
It is what it is
It is
For the record
If every live show on this network went away
If Barstow went away
We would still not move our time slot
We like our time slot
It's where it's at
I just
You know
You just had some stuff to get off your chest
Yeah
So do you want to try to squash it
Or do we just leave it?
It's unhealthy to keep that compartmentalized inside of you.
That's why there's a male mental health problem.
You've got to come to one of my sleepovers, man.
What happens at the sleepover?
NBA Street Volume 2, pizza.
I had a bowl of nectarines, candy, board games.
That sounds like fun, man.
You want to come?
Yeah.
All right, cool.
Is it like a day or?
No, it's a sleepover.
Sleepover.
Oh, the contrary, my friend.
No, no, no.
I'm just saying like, is there a specific day?
Once a month.
Once a month.
Is it random or you just let everybody know?
Yeah, let me know, man.
All right.
Titus, I don't want you to be uncomfortable that you're like, there's a beef lingering
out there.
That's why I brought it up.
Yeah.
Like, you have to like either squash it or maybe.
Well, I mean, it's going to sound.
It's fucked up because I was the one that brought it up today.
But, like, I never really thought it was a beef.
It was more of a frustration.
Right.
I just let out today that I haven't really talked about.
Brandon, I do feel bad.
And I don't want to put Brandon in the middle of it all because he does like those guys.
And Brandon still has a relationship with those guys.
And it's all fine.
Some of them.
Yeah, and I don't even – the Big F part is funny.
That's funny now because –
That was the part that I was just confused about because, again,
I know that you and Marty had history.
I know you and Rico have history.
Big F, I didn't realize.
Well, that's the one thing I regret was saying –
like I got on a roll there for a second, and then I just let out a fuck those guys,
and then I realized I was painting a very broad brush now,
and I probably shouldn't have said fuck Big Ev,
because, like, I don't really, I never really had a problem with Big Ev.
He said you sent him a long text, and he hasn't read it yet.
Really?
In the clip.
So maybe.
He sent you a long text?
No, you sent him a long text.
I sent him a long text where he was just like,
he was like, none of that happened that you said happened, which is,
I mean, it did.
It all happened that way. I don't, so for recollection i'm i'm kind of a third party here but i was
part of trying to go between for the time slot stuff on behalf of brandon on behalf of pick
central i was like marty alluded to it like i talked to marty on the phone i talked to rico
on the phone i'd never talked to big ev on the phone so i don't know if he knows that's what i
think happened was big ev right i was talking to me and i was. I never talked to Big Ev on the phone, so I don't know if he knows. That's what I think happened was Big Ev was talking to me,
and I was like, dude, talk to all the guys on the show.
This happened, and he was like, I had nothing to do with that.
And I'm like, well, if you had nothing to do with it, maybe stand down a little.
He's defending his guys.
I get that.
But that's where I was coming from was defending Brandon,
which Brandon didn't ask me to do, and that's why I feel bad for doing this
because Brandon wasn't like, hey, man. Now you're back in it yeah i'm not no he's not
i'm sorry i haven't said anything yet somebody said to me you above that i'm just kidding i'm
kidding i'm kidding but this controversy was going on in the first place i was in brandon's corner
trying to like i was like get back out there man fight him he's like i don't want to fight i like
those guys whatever i was like dude fucking you're gonna have to wake up how early to get in here and
he's like it's all right man i can do it and all that and you know brandon's above being
childish brandon's above those characters on your shirt but i i was okay those are cool little
cartoons on your shirt all right well we'll we'll leave it tj wait where does nate fall into this
i mean you ruined nate forever for us, Aaron. Oh, damn.
Aaron calling him the white Kanye.
He can't undersee it.
I never saw it.
And then you tweeted that, and I was like, wait, what?
It's wild.
Yeah.
It's wild.
He is the white Kanye.
Nato Nates.
I don't think I've ever seen him before in real life.
He just came across my timeline.
I was like, hey, yo, Nato Nates.
Same people that tried to blackball Nate.
Thought about two things.
They are actually like, now Nate is not anti-Semitic
and doesn't have the things that Kanye has done in the last few years.
But in terms of misunderstood geniuses,
I would say Nate and Kanye are very much on the same boat.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Shout out to Nate.
Nate, he's the straw that stirs the drink.
Look at that.
He doesn't get enough credit for it.
Now I can't unsee it.
That's exactly what he looks like.
I can't see it.
I can't see it.
All right, so TJ, you want me to let them just –
you want me to try squash, or what do you want me to do?
I feel like it's not going to get squashed if we don't.
I'll do what TJ wants me to do.
Should have a fair one, bro.
We should call them.
All right, so just want to call Big Ev real quick. I don't want to linger on it, but I also. I'll do what TJ wants me to do. Shoot him a fair one, bro. We should call him. All right.
What about you guys?
I want to call Big Ev real quick.
I don't want to linger on it, but I also –
I'll talk to Big Ev.
It's also like a thing that is just going to –
No, it's not going to die.
It's not going to die.
That's how you do it, bro.
You shoot him a 30.
That's how he's doing.
He's growing up.
30 seconds.
Handle your business, and after that, you shake it up.
All right.
Yeah, so let's handle our business.
I'll talk to Big Ev.
It might take longer than 30 seconds.
You want me to text him?
It can get ugly after 30. Do you want me to text him? It can get ugly after 30.
Do you want me to text him?
Oh, I did.
TJ?
Or do you have his number?
Come on, Zoom.
Oh, you guys have the Buckeye connection.
Yeah.
Yeah, we do.
What is a Buckeye?
What is that?
It's a nut.
It's a nut.
It's a nut that grows on a tree.
Shout out to that.
They're the nuts.
I didn't know that.
Big shout out.
Yeah, big shout out.
They're for luck, right?
Aren't they lucky?
Yeah, I think so.
The treat.
The treat is top three.
The treat is good, yeah.
Have you had it?
Yeah, you had a Buckeye.
They're like chocolate.
Round Ohio, yeah, it's like peanut butter wrapped in chocolate.
It looks like a Buckeye.
It's like a round Reese's Cup.
It's so good.
My grandfather kept a Buckeye.
I forgot about those.
Buckeye for luck. By the way, TJ, yesterday It's so good. My grandfather kept a Buckeye. I forgot about those.
By the way, TJ, yesterday I accidentally sent a link for this show,
like a video, random internet video to TJ Lavin by accident.
He was like, what is this?
I love TJ Lavin.
Yeah, I think I'm going to see him in Vegas.
He lives in Vegas.
Oh, nice. Super Bowl.
Has mostly sports and Pick Central.
Have you guys tried, like, going two weeks on weeks on two weeks off and then the other person goes on
it is funny that mincy yeah like he he'll never have an issue with time slots because
his show doesn't exist half the time more than half even in the planning stages and i know there's
some some producers have to travel and everything how How did two weeks on, two weeks off become a thing at all?
You know.
Got the schedule of a lumberjack.
How did?
Yeah, he's an offshore driller.
He's an oil rigger, yeah.
He's a coal miner.
This was the plan all along?
This wasn't a last move to.
No, no, this is a plan.
I didn't tell nobody either.
He just did two weeks and then, oh, now I'm not here.
I don't know.
Big F said yes, absolutely.
I think we're just going to squash it.
Let's just fucking squash it.
That way we can move on and then we can go about our day and go back to the yak.
Has Amos ever beefed with a show?
You want to pick one?
You guys should start a beef.
I pick a show.
Yeah.
Oprah.
All right.
Arian, as someone who's a little removed,
when you see all the Barstool beef, what is your thoughts?
I have no idea what's going on.
I don't know.
Y'all can handle it.
That's what it sounds like.
Yeah.
It don't sound big enough to where y'all going to fight.
So if it ain't there, then just.
You're talking about fist fight?
Yeah.
So it's a fight or don't waste your time?
Yeah, that's actually a good...
That's a good policy.
Yeah.
The Christian Bale quote is the one that I always think about
when it's like, if someone talks shit about you,
but they can't text you,
that means you don't know them well enough for them to know you
to talk shit about you.
Like, if they don't have your number to talk to you directly, that means that they don't even know you and for them to know you to talk shit about you like if they don't have your number to talk to you directly that means that they don't even know you and
you're just talking shit it ain't that crucial uh big ev what's up what's up again let's squash
this beef let's squash it so i'm gonna go first i'm gonna go first big ev uh i regret i i walk
back saying fuck those guys uh i my emotions got the best of me. I was rolling.
I shouldn't have included you in that.
There are guys I would like to include in that,
but I never really had that much of a problem with you.
I did have a problem with Pick Central as a show.
You as a brand, your show, mostly sports, does have a beef with Pick Central,
going back to the time slot controversy.
And the whole reason this got brought up today,
this is not something that I have been thinking about every day and uh just waiting to explode it was
towards the end of our show uh it got brought to our attention that that dave and wit and kirk are
are doing a show at 11 30 and someone made a comment about how like that's at the same time
as pick central and then i just use that as an opportunity to get some shit off my chest like i wonder if they're gonna have a problem with that time slot and make them
move like they did to us and that was basically it and then i said fuck those guys which i should
have said uh when i said those guys i didn't necessarily mean you but i did kind of mean the
show as a whole the idea of the show so i guess you know i regret that and i'm sorry for that one
well i guess i appreciate that i guess for me
and i think i think dan will attest to this is he obviously know me longer than you know me
i don't have really ill will towards like anybody like i'm like i genuinely like root for everyone
and the reason it set me off so much was because even like brandon did the show listen your show
does better views more views brand Brandon is a phenomenal host.
In my proper word, I would love to continue working with Brandon.
But genuinely, I had never at any point at any ill words,
your show mostly supports anything.
And even we had our incident in the beginning that I talked about in the video with Columbus where I thought you unfollowed me.
I thought that was kind of like a weird, lame move.
But even that, like I called you, we talked about it, it was all good, it was behind me,
was totally in the past.
Truly, like, genuinely, we're both Ohio State
guys, wanted us to be allies, everything.
So, it just, like,
when I just heard me, like, fuck those guys,
like, in this whole, basically, trying to, like,
drop your dick on me, like, I felt that personally
it's just, like, somebody who's been on the show for a while.
That just drove me nuts.
And I was just about to let people know, and i i don't get in like these beefs very often
people almost like ever really so it's just like when i just heard that it just i just
fucking lost my mind i was like i can't believe i've had so much like trying to have so much like
goodwill and like even if i'm not saying it out loud like in my heart like rooting for people to
do well i'm like oh like good for them like i was i've worked with brandon closey for a long time i consider us friends i love ebo we're close to
ebo like the counter's good guy like at least besides our little spat i was gonna like
i just i don't know titus that well he's doing his thing like we have no besides you i haven't
worked around each other a ton i'm thinking everything's all good like everything's happy
like i thought we'd put the time something behind us.
I think there was a misconception with, I think, initially,
it wasn't about the show being bigger.
It was more just, like, we had, like, been here.
I think there was just a whole trickle down of Buster Ray who just kind of jumped in where we had done it.
And obviously, like, listen, Kevin's been around a long time,
fights for a long time.
Like, they're going to take precedent.
So now I still stand by, like, it's one of those things where we were budging for them.
It wasn't quite the same with, like, you guys, no disrespect.
But we still were even willing to move.
Like, we still were, like, even.
Yeah, I don't think you were.
That's the problem.
Like, and I, this isn't your fault.
This is why I regret you being collateral damage.
That's not how it went.
Like, Brandon.
I don't think you were involved.
You weren't involved in the, you weren't involved in like how he did the time slot thing.
Yeah.
And that to me,
like I was even a little annoyed at the time.
And this is up to you with you Titus.
At the time I was almost a little annoyed with Brandon because I felt he
was talking to Marty and not me about it,
which in the moment I felt like it was basically like,
I was not even important enough to like discuss about it,
which is I talked to Brandon about it.
And he more, he more ready to me, like, Big F's not even important enough to, like, discuss about it, which then I talked to Brandon about it. And he more, he more, really, to me, it's like there was no point in talking to, like, all three of you at once about the same thing.
Like, talk to Marty, he'll relate.
So I still even, like, I didn't love that in the moment.
But even that, like I said, me and Brandon worked together a lot.
So even that, I was like, put that aside.
And we generally as a group, like, and I will say this, because I know truly I would defend Rico on this. Rico at the time, like, truly was like, honestly, if there was anyone,
even at the initial time, that was like, let's just move, let's just move,
let's just move.
Like, on my mother's grave, it was Rico that was like, let's move.
So I hope – I know he walked out and he didn't want beef.
I'm defending him here.
It's the truth.
It's the God's honest truth.
I know he got in a spat with Brandon or whatever.
I think Rico might have not wanted to move as much as –
Yeah, I might throw a challenge flag on him.
Yeah, but between the two of you –
Unless he was lying to me.
Yeah, I mean, Rico definitely didn't want to move.
That's a fact.
But it's –
He said that's us.
Okay, that –
He was telling me over and over he didn't want to fight.
He didn't want to move.
No, this is all in the past, though.
So, are we squashed? Because Titus,us he's right he shouldn't have said fuck you guys
yeah i mean i'll be honest i'll just say with the problem the the problems with mush and rico for me
it was it was like when i got hired here that was the problem uh every you were great to me
everybody was great to me uh there were two guys that weren't but one of them was rico was rico was
rico reached out and like tried to like the first thing he came up to me was like,
I was a different man then all that sort of thing.
Uh,
we had squashed the beef.
I had had him on my show a bunch.
I loved Rico.
Everything was fine with Rico mush.
Every time he talks about me makes up bullshit.
Uh,
he,
he,
he,
he pretends like he and I have never had a problem when I've never,
I've barely ever talked to the guy,
but,
uh,
the, the, the show that he did with Rico and Jake a problem when I've barely ever talked to the guy but uh the the the
show that he did with Rico and Jake a million years ago um when before I even worked at Barstool
I had asked Jake to come on my old show that caused a whole rift with him most was was making
up bullshit about how I was standoffish to him and and I think I'm better than him and all that
which literally never happened I was just like at a bar drinking a beer just staring at my beer and somehow he concocted this whole fantasy uh and then he's been that way since i got hired here
which is fine by me so my whole thing was like moshe rico and then recently you know the the rico
rumors that are swirling about rico maybe may or may not i don't think he did i'll defend rico on
that one i would love to i would love to get some clarity on that.
And then Rico, of course, when we launched Mostly Sports
and he launched Healthy Debate, which I have been a proponent of Healthy Debate.
I've gone on Healthy Debate, but Rico took it upon himself
to throw a lot of shots at us.
That's fair.
Right?
And this has kind of kept happening.
So as that was going on, I was like, well, I thought Rico and I were cool,
but he seems to keep taking shots at us.
Mush, whatever, I don't really think about him.
But, you know, like that.
You two, though, because you guys, like, have worked together, can we squash your two beef?
Yeah, yeah.
So, Ev, that was really, when I said fuck those guys, I was thinking about that.
I wasn't really thinking about you.
Clemmer, I've never, I don't know if I've literally ever. No, fuck Clemmer. Okay, fuck Clemmer. Don't reject the really thinking about you Clemmer I've never I don't know if I've literally
No fuck Clemmer
Okay fuck Clemmer
Don't reject us
Always fuck Clemmer
I actually reached out to Clemmer
And apologized
I text him fuck you
I don't know if I've ever
Actually even talked to Clemmer
I'm gonna text him fuck you
But that's why F2
Like that's why
When you're in Chicago
I didn't bring it up to you
Cause like I honestly
Wasn't I don't
It's not like I've been
Waking up every day
Thinking like when I get my chance
I'm gonna say fuck those guys
It was that
It just happened Spur of the moment that it got brought up on our
show that Dave and Kirk and,
and wit are going to be in the 1130 Eastern time slot.
And then I was just like, I wonder, I was just making a joke.
And then I just got rolling and got some shit off my chest.
And that's what happened. But I'm cool with you.
Um, no, I'm cool. I mean, I'm cool with you, and I get why you were fired up.
Yeah, I didn't think your reaction was, like, out of turn, Ev.
And I get you standing up for your guys,
but that's what I was doing for Brandon.
I know a lot of what is going on behind the scenes here,
and the Ev-Titus thing was the only thing where I was like,
well, those guys really shouldn't have beef because I don't think that,
like, I get what you're doing, Ev, so can we squash it?
We're squashed. I'm squashed.
And I want to save the record because I don't want my mom to die. I will say,
at least the way he reacted to me and what I was told. I want to make that clear because I love my mother and I don't want her to die. So I want to make that very clear.
Wait, what was that? I swear it was on his mother.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
That's fair.
That's fair.
At least the way Rico acted towards me the entire time,
at least the way he related to me, spoke to me,
was that he was very willing to move the time spot
and did not want any beef.
I'm saying just because I love my brother very much,
so I want to make that clear.
Hey, welcome to the team, brother.
All right.
Well, thank you, Big Ev.
I appreciate you calling in. Sorry we welcome to the team, brother. All right. Well, thank you, Big Ev. I appreciate you calling in.
Sorry we had to squash some beef, but I'm happy that you guys at least have squashed.
Beef squash.
Yeah, yeah.
All right.
Thanks, Ev.
Go Buckeyes.
Go Buckeyes.
See ya.
There we go.
All right.
We got that squash.
You and Marty, that can happen another day.
That won't happen.
That's not what this show is.
Yeah, that's okay.
That's just not going to happen.
That was the only thing.
When I watched that clip, I was like, I know there's history between Marty and Titus
That I understand I was like I don't think there's history
Between Ev and Titus so I don't know
I am frustrated with Rico and I would love to actually figure out
Maybe get him on
No no no we're not doing this whole show
Our audience does not want it
I just wanted to get that one
We have Bachelor stuff
I'm sorry to our audience
It also was if yesterday didn't happen, I would consider ignoring this.
But yesterday happened, and then we can't just be like, oh, nothing has happened, even though that's not what this show is.
I'm not scared of the confrontation, but again, it sounds ridiculous because I was the one who brought it up.
But I wasn't saying it to start a confrontation.
Yeah, that's how it works here. I know. Just it to start a conversation. Yeah, that's how it works here.
I know.
Yeah.
Just to get shit off my chest, but that is how it works.
And we'll knock out the other beefs later.
Aaron, was that a good use of the 30-second method?
It's not what I'm used to, but I'm glad y'all got it out of the way.
Yeah.
Aaron, you want to draft some bachelorettes?
Let's do it, man.
All right, so we got the prep sheet.
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all right sorry to the yak audience i know they don't really like that's not why they tune in the
show but i also will remind you it's my birthday so don't say anything yeah you're allowed to don't
say anything mean to me i have a gift coming for you today but it's latest it's it's latest rivals
10 p.m okay i don. Do you guys like your birthday?
No.
I don't like my birthday.
I don't.
It feels weird.
Yeah, I don't.
I'm not a...
It's just a lot of text answering.
Right.
A lot of text.
Thanks, man.
Hope you're well.
Happy birthday.
I've actually never had a birthday party, so...
What?
Ever?
Never.
Wait, did you grow up Jehovah's Witness?
No.
No.
Foster?
I made that up.
No.
But they don't do birthdays. No, no. We just... Jehovah's Witness doesn No. No. Foster home. I made that up. No. But they don't do birthdays.
No, no.
We just broke.
Jehovah's Witness doesn't do birthdays.
Yeah.
No, we just broke.
Yeah.
We couldn't do birthdays.
Okay.
Got it.
Well, when's your birthday?
August 24th.
Let's have a fucking birthday.
Let's have a party.
That's a bad time of the year for a party.
Sleepover.
Sleepover.
We could do a case race for you.
What is that?
We do case races on this show for birthdays where we all have to drink.
Chug beer.
Scream let's go.
Okay with that.
Yeah.
Karaoke.
It's really messy.
Some slurs, but not a lot.
Yeah.
It gets bad.
It's not a lot.
But it's fun.
I'm with it.
Yeah, all right.
So maybe we'll do a case race for your birthday, August.
No, let's do like a Billy Madison of birthday party.
So start with one.
Oh.
Knock out all your birthdays in one day that you missed.
Would you let us do that for you? 37 birthdays.
Would you let us do that for you?
So what exactly is...
Alright, so one, we'll smash your face
in a cake. Yeah.
And clean your diaper.
You gotta shit yourself one, two, three, four.
Yep. Five, maybe
we'll do like Ninja Turtles. I gotta shit
myself on my birthday and y'all are doing me a favor
we're cleaning up your dirty butt
you get to be a baby
5-10 we'll go through like Ninja Turtles
Power Rangers
10-15
maybe we'll like play dodgeball
go to like a trampoline park
then we get to like the know the 18th for 21
You're gonna have to do 21 shots get my sweet 16 will get you a car
Oh, we also your quinceanera will do a kids in the air our minutes for quinceanera sweet 16
Roll your oh one out of Corolla. Yeah, we will have to baptize you at some point as well. Is that a birthday thing? I don't know. But we'll just have to do it. We'll just have to throw it in.
We're going to have to watch you have sex and say it was you losing your virginity.
What?
Okay.
We're just going to live your life.
Okay.
Yeah.
Forget the birthdays.
Just live your life.
Yeah.
Let's do it.
I'm in.
Yeah.
Here we go.
Will it be concurrent with the years of his life?
Yeah.
We could fire up NCAA 14.
Do 9-11 again?
Oh.
Yeah, we will have to do that because that was right after your birthday.
It really wasn't.
It was.
Well, no, it was right after your birthday.
This is a long time after.
Well, August 24th, September 11th, that's.
We're skipping years.
But that's very close.
We're doing your life.
We're going to do your whole life.
We've got to tell the truth of your life.
Yeah.
We've got to put ourselves in the mood of what you're 9, 10, 11, 12?
September 11.
What year was it?
01, right?
Uh-huh.
Yeah.
See, I was...
Well, if you're 37 now, that means you're...
Bad at math, bro.
I was like...
So, 87.
So, you were 14?
14.
Yeah, no, like 13, 14 years.
Yeah, so we got high school.
Maybe we'll go Tennessee days. We'll all dress up in Tennessee gear and be like uncomfortable boosters to you. Yeah, no, like 13, 14 years. Yeah, so we got high school. Maybe we'll go Tennessee days.
We'll all dress up in Tennessee gear and be like uncomfortable boosters to you.
And then when you get into the pros, we'll start complaining about our fantasy team to you.
I like that one.
Do you remember your first touchdown after 9-11?
Did you salute?
I bet you fucking did, dude.
Yeah.
You did.
I bet you did.
Yeah, definitely didn't salute.
I'm just trying to think of my first touchdown.
Your first post- 9-11 touchdown nah i don't think i did yeah i like this we'll just do it all i'm with it yeah i'm okay with this um all right
should we do bachelorette yeah i want to object to objectify women, please. Well, it's not.
We're just picking the ones we think are going to win.
I'm only looking at interest.
So we're picking the ones we think are going to win?
Yeah.
Yes.
So we each get, how many women are there?
Wait, who would win for us or who do we think is going to win?
There's 32.
Who do you think is going to win at all?
Who do you think is going to win at all?
But we have a twist because I think someone tried to tip off a few of us in the room on who wins.
How would they know?
They keep that under lock and key.
The winner of this is going to be who picks the second place person.
I need to see a picture of the dude before I look at them.
Oh, Joey?
Good point.
He's an Italian dude.
Went to Westchester.
Was a Pike communication major.
Went to Springford.
Tennis pro now.
He's a tennis pro?
Tennis pro
Like a legit
He played
No I think he fucks divorcees
At like a country club
Zoe looks like Carla from Scrubs
Can we get him on the thing?
I want to see what he looks like
Cause I can't
I mean none of this matters right?
He talks a little dumb
Okay
A little slow
And you say he's from where? There he is Not a great looking bachelor None of this matters, right? He talks a little dumb. Okay. A little slow.
And you say he's from where?
There he is.
Not a great looking bachelor, if we're being honest.
He's a good looking guy.
I think he's pretty. Not cute enough for you?
I'd fucking look.
He's no King Tut.
I agree.
Y'all was hating on him.
They were hating on him.
I feel bad, man.
Yeah.
He did all right for what he was.
Yeah.
That's him?
Yeah, he was a king.
I don't know about him.
No grooming back then.
You're hung up on that, huh?
I mean.
That's just how they lived, man.
You got to judge him by his era.
That's how he lived.
I agree.
But y'all were saying he was a fool.
I was saying he was a little better than that.
Like, pharaohs are amongst, like, the hottest breed of human ever.
Agreed.
Yeah.
He was disabled.
Those knees. Did you see those knees?
I mean, now we're just...
There's something sexy about power.
True.
But he wasn't, like, doing anything
powerful. But he had power.
Was he making decisions? I bet you he had
big and impactful decisions.
What? Just a king?
Yeah.
You can be an ugly king.
It's fine.
Yeah, because you're the king.
Yeah.
Luke asked me if King Tut was a king, for the record.
Well, he said pharaoh.
I had an even better one this morning when the puppies came by for a pause
because we gave our big quarterly check from Stell Blue Coffee.
And the pause, Chicago people were here,
and the puppies were here, and the big check was here.
And White Sox Dave was like, did you get Stella from Paws?
I was just like, yeah, dude.
That's what this is.
Mook, you were covered in hives.
Oh, yeah.
It was bad.
I played with the dogs.
You're allergic to pups?
Oh, yeah.
I didn't know that.
Arian hates dogs.
Yeah, I was very i
just i don't hate them i just we i we don't got nothing in common why can't we we can't criticize
them and i think that's unfair i agree uh i'm just like so like all right if you have to you
know lunch or whatever and you bring your dog i'm just like get the fucking dog out of here bro
dogs have gotten more too many rights they shouldn't be everywhere that's my main issue
with dogs is that we treat dogs better than humans that's and that's what makes me mad it's like you
know you're walking by you know saying you kick a homeless people off the curb but then you leave a
bowl there for a dog and i'm like you know sit like that i'll be like fuck dogs that's that's a
fair uh assessment because i do think dogs have more rights than humans now and aaron you'd like
this because when we first opened this office people were like oh we have dogs and every day i was
like we can do dogs like once a month and i i love dogs like i i'm a dog person but i think
sometimes dog people don't think that they're they think everyone wants their dog yeah like
babies so it's like you have to like stop it so that people can't be like, oh, I'm going to bring my dog every day.
Also, I leave a bowl of dog food for homeless people.
So I treat them to a bowl of Alpo.
Two birds with one stone. Two birds with one stone out there for a while.
Yeah, you misinterpreted that.
A bowl of water was not for the dogs.
It was for the people.
Yeah, the dog gets the water out of the bottle.
Yeah, yeah.
The dog food goes to the homeless person.
You get a high pH one.
Okay.
So I think we should do, since the jury pool
might be a little corrupted here, because
some people might know who wins,
I think second place should be the winner.
Okay, we have to get the person that comes in second.
That's fine, but I agree with Nick. Nobody knows who wins.
I don't know.
I said someone DM'd me.
I already forget her name. They might be trying to fuck with us. who went to that. I don't know. You guys said that someone told you. No, I said someone DM'd me and I didn't forget.
I already forget her name.
They might be trying
to fuck with us.
They might have been
fucking with us.
Yeah, I did nothing
with the interview.
And I also couldn't
tell you the name it was.
Okay.
Yeah.
Interesting.
But I still say
we go second place.
Yeah, I think second place
is funny.
So we're picking
the second place.
Yeah.
Why don't we go
first eliminated?
Why don't we go
in the order?
Well, here's the other
wrinkle is that
half of these girls
I think have already
been second.
Yeah, I think like
nine, ten got
eliminated yesterday. All right, so what does the winner get? Whoever picks second, whoever has the? Well, here's the other wrinkle is that half of these girls have already been second. Yeah, I think like nine episodes got eliminated yesterday.
All right, so what does the winner get?
Whoever picks second, whoever has the-
Oh, they get the woman.
A thousand of your dollars.
Yeah.
They get to lie with the woman.
Yeah, she's single.
If she's second-
If she's second place, she'll get the chick.
That's why I'm picking every girl from Shithog.
Forget the second place thing.
It should just be, because how many girls are there?
32.
32.
How many of us there's
seven of us god this is gonna be taken out of four not four not time out that this show is going on
right now right now and it's already been decided well it was already happened they're just they're
airing televised oh so okay when the first episode so it might leak all right last night probably has
a second episode aired last night okay so ain't nobody these women are gone booted yet
oh they've been booted oh she will have been booted yet. No, there have been some booted.
People have been booted, but we don't watch.
We have no idea what's going on.
Yeah.
I saw the Golden Bachelor.
The old guy?
That old guy.
That shit was lit.
I liked it, man.
You liked the old guy?
Yeah.
He kicked off one of the Joneses.
Did he fuck a lot?
I doubt it, but he kicked off one of the Joneses.
I looked for her Instagram.
Yeah?
Yeah.
I got a thing for older women, though.
Was there anybody young?
How old were we talking?
We talking like 60s, 70s. Oh the Instagram yeah I found it did you I didn't
follow I thought it would be creepy but maybe she pops up in my algorithm and it happens naturally
was this like a lifelong thing or you yeah I've always been into older women like so even like
now like I don't really fall in over like 20 year olds it's weird just progressively older than you
are always like 60 no just I had to be like 10 to 20 years older than me when we saw there's gonna be a time when
we throw your 16th birthday yeah when we throw your 16th birthday party what age would you like
us to bring the woman question fuck is that like a 26 year old no i still have to do it in my 37-year-old body. Okay, okay. All right. Give me like a 50.
50?
Yeah, 40 to 50.
I'm cool with it.
For a 16-year-old?
He's going to jail.
But it's me, though.
But you're 16.
Yeah.
Okay.
I can cosplay 16.
Cosplay 16.
It's like euphoria.
All right.
So there's Zah.
You don't know who wins or anything, right?
Nah. I'm not watching the Bachelor.
All right, so Zah, you'll be in the draft too.
What do you got against the Bachelor, bro?
No, I usually watch it.
Oh, okay.
I usually watch it.
This is just the first season I haven't watched in a while.
Oh, I got you.
You sound a little...
I got you.
So here's what we'll do.
We'll all take four.
Okay.
And Zah will be in it.
And I think what we should do is the scoring system should just be...
It should be when you get eliminated.
So if you're eliminated last, it's one point lowest score wins.
Does that make sense?
Where buddy from again?
What did you say?
Us?
No, no, the best.
He's from Philly.
Or Montgomery County.
All right.
That's where Connor Griffin's from.
And TJ, you have the list of girls that have already been eliminated?
That's important.
I don't.
What's the punishment if we draft?
Somebody's going to have the most eliminated women.
Well, it sounds like that person's got free reign to go ahead and contact them.
Whoever finishes last will come up with a bachelorette wheel.
Deal.
Okay.
All right.
Who wants first pick?
Me.
All right. Kyle gets it. I think the guest should get it. I wants first pick? Me. All right.
Kyle gets it.
I think the guest should get it.
I'll go second and third.
No, we're going in order.
Kyle.
Got it.
Kyle goes, and I'll finish and wrap back around.
All right.
All right.
Ready, Kyle?
You don't even have his first pick ready.
War Room is trash.
Yeah.
Do you have the girls, TJ, that you can show the selections?
Nine of them look just very similar.
I would say the majority.
Yeah, I'll send you.
What are you doing?
Nine of them look very similar to me.
It's not a silent draft, is it?
Oh, Jesus, Kyle.
Kyle, please don't say what.
Oh, boy.
Fasoli. Who's out there? I don't know why is it? Oh, Jesus, Kyle. Kyle, please don't say what. Oh, boy. Fasoli.
Who's out there?
I don't know why.
I want some pens.
All right, I got mine.
I think.
Yeah.
Who's out there?
If you draft somebody drafted, you lose your pick.
Okay, I definitely need a pen then.
Oh, yeah.
More so.
Can you grab us like ten pens?
Pens.
Yeah, Fasoli's got it. Is this a snake draft? Yes. Okay. Can you give me the draft pens? Pens. Yeah, if it's totally got it.
Is this a snake draft?
Yes.
Okay.
Can you give me the draft order just so I can write it down?
It's just Kyle around the room.
When does the booth go?
Or when does Zaha go?
Zaha goes after Arian.
Okay.
And let's try to do it fast.
I don't think this is good.
No, it's not.
We'll do it fast.
It's pretty bad.
Leah, the 23-year-old.
The dude's a pie cap alpha.
He likes him young.
She's an account manager.
That means she has a Gmail.
She's from Hawaii.
That was a reach.
That was a reach.
That was a bad pick.
That was a bad pick.
Bad pick?
Leah's off the board?
Yeah.
I think he's the type of guy that would like an account manager from Hawaii, 23-year-old.
Leo is eighth on my big board for what it's worth.
Of course.
Your big board.
Wait, Steven, you made a big board?
Well, don't show us the big board.
I'll just comment throughout.
Okay, all right.
He is our draft panelist.
Can you pass me a pen?
I think they look very similar.
Pass me a pen.
All right, go ahead, Mook.
Got a lot of account executives.
I'm going to go with Samantha, the cheerleader from Miami, Florida.
Yeah, that's probably a good pick.
Used to dress up as a princess, cheerleader for the Dolphins,
competed in pageants.
This guy's looking for a princess.
Okay.
Get a cheer off the board.
Dolphins cheer.
Samantha.
Leah's gone. Nobody wants to All right. Okay. Get you off the board. Dolphins cheer. Samantha. Leah's gone.
Nobody wants to marry that.
Unranked.
Unranked.
Why would anybody want to marry a Dolphins cheerleader?
Yep.
Listen, this is our draft analyst.
He's giving us the –
A 25-year-old Dolphins cheerleader?
You can't argue with the draft analyst.
What's the shelf life for that career?
Five years?
All right.ry and you're
up or no titus you're up uh yeah what what race is this guy white is the white guy white and white
and then i'm sticking with my gut then uh i'm taking lauren um because oh dude wow
i've got bad news for you what i think she self-eliminated last night.
Oh, no.
Whoa, the pick is in, though.
Pick's in.
Pick's in.
She shit her pants?
Is that what you said?
She self-eliminated.
Pick is in.
She came her pants.
First stuff in, she is out.
Oh.
Nice pick, loser.
All right.
Did she self-eliminate?
That was actually my pick. Yes, she did. All right. Go ahead, Arian. Did she self-eliminate? That was actually my pick.
Yes, she did.
All right.
Go ahead, Arian.
Glad you got that off the board.
That was my pick.
Stephanie, let us know whenever we picked eliminated girls.
I am going to go with Medina, the mental health therapist.
She was my all-time.
I think she's exotic.
He's from a small town, right?
He wanted to try something different. Okay. Yeah. Bangladeshi. She's exotic. He's from a small town, right? He wants to try something different.
Okay.
Yeah.
Bangladeshi.
She's older.
She's from Bangladesh.
Okay.
She likes to exercise or whatever.
So shout out to her, Medina.
Great value.
Number two on the big board.
Wow.
Steven, what is your big board based off?
Real data?
Size.
It is.
Don't worry about it.
Okay.
Can you look into this?
Go ahead, Zah.
All righty. So this guy this? Go ahead, Zah. All righty.
So this guy is a white guy, black hair.
Looks like kind of a lib.
He looks like a lib.
Yeah.
Kind of looks like Brendan Jones.
He looks exactly like Brendan Jones.
Exactly, exactly.
And a Brendan Jones kind of guy would probably be into a Taylor Swift loving account manager.
And her name is the beautiful, the lovely, the blonde bombshell Daisy.
Daisy.
Good pick.
I think that might be the best pick.
Okay.
Daisy.
Daisy.
He's got Lyme disease.
He has Lyme disease?
A cochlear implant as well.
Oh, she's...
Okay.
She's got everything a guy wants.
I may have seen a clip of them vibing extra hard.
Okay.
Did you watch the show?
Yeah.
Okay.
I think he picked the winner.
All right, Nick, go ahead.
I got to go with the bilingual girl, Jen, 25.
Ooh.
Physicians assistant from Miami, Florida.
Okay. Okay.
Jen.
She loves Shawn Mendes music.
Maybe the hottest one.
Oh.
Oh.
Was that number one on your big board?
Oh, she is very attractive.
No.
She was seven.
Okay.
Go ahead, Brandon.
I get my pick that I had yesterday.
Marlena is a 26-year-old finance writer from West Palm Beach, Florida.
She has a five-year plan that includes being married with two kids and rescue dogs.
So I got Marlena.
Oh, yeah, that's a good pick.
Marlena?
Marlena, yeah.
Great head shot.
That's a great pick.
Yeah, that's a classic.
You off?
Uh...
Uh-oh, what?
Yeah, she's out of here.
Oh, nice. All right. Wait, she's out of here. Oh, nice.
All right.
Wait, is she out?
Yeah.
All right, I have two.
How do you know that?
Because it snakes back, right?
Yeah.
Wait a second.
How does Kyle know who's on and off?
He watched the show.
Yeah, he watched the show.
You clicked on that.
All right, I'm going to go with...
I couldn't help it.
I'm going to go with Lainey is my first pick.
Yeah.
From Pennsylvania.
He's from Philadelphia, right?
Mm-hmm.
So you got that in common.
Also, she has a large Polish and Greek family.
I feel like they always keep one of these girls around
that they do the family meet,
and it's like, look at my crazy, wacky family.
Are you concerned her sister self-eliminated?
That's not her.
That's her sister?
Her sister self-eliminated?
I don't know.
No, that's Allison.
That's Lainey.
Lauren self-eliminated, right? Yeah,. No, that's Allison. That's Lainey. Lainey. Lauren self-eliminated, right?
Yeah, Lainey is my pick.
Lauren's my pick.
That's her sister.
Lainey is my pick.
Wait.
Oh, Allison.
I see.
All right, and I'm going off the same logic.
I've never watched The Bachelor, but I just know they do the home visit thing.
I'm going to go with Autumn because she's a twin.
And twin.
And that feels like that will come up yep she he that's always in
your mind and then she's like he's like oh do i like the twin more than i like the real thing
they would love that yeah autumn okay back to brandon come on let's keep it moving yeah you're
right uh sydney vintage store owner 28 new, Newport, Rhode Island, blonde.
Okay.
Tattoo on her forearm.
I'm going with her, Sydney.
He has a palm tree tattoo on his forearm, too, so that's a good pick.
Is that a boot?
What is that?
The issue with Sydney is she has, quote, I am so ready to find my forever person.
Desperate.
Scary.
She's on the bachelor.
Desperate.
28.
All these women are on TV trying to. That's a bad energy. Scary. She's on the passion. Desperate. 28. All these women are on TV trying to.
That's a bad energy.
Okay.
They're trying to get famous.
They're not trying to fuck.
That's so pessimistic.
Steven, do you have anything on these?
I agree.
Unranked.
We got a lot of unranked.
Oh, shit.
Okay.
How many did you rank?
Top 10.
My number one on the big board is still very available.
Go ahead, Nick.
So I'm torn between two.
Okay.
I kind of want to go a different race.
Ooh.
That's where I was heading.
Yeah.
But I'm not.
I'm going to go Leah.
She was expecting it.
But I thought about it.
I'm going Leah.
She got accepted into. Oh, wait, no, wait.
Is this Lexi or Leah?
There's two Leahs.
There's a 30-year-old.
I want 30-year-old digital strategist Leah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But then it says Lexi right below.
I like Leah.
I got Lexi.
This is Lexi.
Oh, it's Lexi.
Okay.
She did the MIT summer program.
As a child, she moved 15 times.
That's lazy. I did the MIT summer program. Yeah. As a child, she moved 15 times. That's lazy.
I did that this morning.
Well said.
All right, Zah.
Your pick?
I mean, a white dude, Nick picking a black girl.
No, I didn't pick a black girl.
No, you didn't.
Oh, you didn't end up picking her.
Oh, hell no.
I was losing my mind back there.
I'm like, what the fuck are you doing?
White boys love the typical.
Speak for yourself, bro.
I also love the typical.
So it doesn't get more typical than the name Kelsey.
Kelsey.
There's two.
Not the black girl.
Of course.
Jay was like, it's two.
Sorry, I love black women, by the way.
You're forgiven.
Yeah, I think you're okay, Zaha.
All right, Arian.
If this was me, I would say this.
I would do Evelyn, the jump from San Antonio, but it ain't me.
So I'm going to go with Caitlyn.
I'm going to stick with Caitlyn.
I think my guy likes the exact jumps.
And she bought her first home at 23.
That's crazy.
So she got it.
You know what I'm saying?
So she don't need him for nothing.
I'm lost.
Yeah.
In San Diego, too.
So that's some real money.
Yeah, she's from Dago.
You know what I'm saying?
It's the crib.
Good pick.
I like that pick.
Caitlyn.
Shout out to Caitlyn. Okay. Titus? All right, I'm going? It's the crib. Good pick. I like that pick. Caitlyn. Shout out to Caitlyn.
Okay.
Titus?
All right, I'm going with Lauren.
That failed me, but I'm going with the theory that Lauren bowed out
because she wants her sister Allison.
That's what I wanted.
Yeah.
The production team would love that.
I think they're going to push Allison to the moon because Lauren tipped out.
Great pick.
Great pick.
And she probably said a lot of great things about allison yeah on
her way out and the producers want that home visit oh yeah oh yeah yes visit it was like that
i regret leaving and he's like you can come back yep home visit you can come back all right
mook i'm gonna fade za here and go the other kelsey kelsey t there we go uh some white boys
have range za so uh watch how you speak on us.
I will say she is a divorcee
and she's here to find a
relationship. I'm going to take her to go a long way.
Okay. Not divorced,
but she was previously engaged. Oh, that's
not divorced. Huge red
flag. 31, actor, LA.
Lot of boomer bust.
You said Miami Dolphin cheerleader
was a red flag?
Yeah, Che, you just might be gay.
You're gay.
You're a gay man.
All right, KB, you have two picks.
All right, I like where Arian's head was.
I'm going Evelyn.
She's beautiful, yeah.
All right, that was nice.
Eight siblings, that's crazy. That's home visit. Papa was a roller stone. She's beautiful. Alright, that was nice. Eight siblings, that's crazy.
That's home visit. Papa was a roller stone.
That's home visit.
Someone pick Caitlyn, the radio chemist.
Yep.
Radio chemist?
I don't know what the fuck that means.
Yeah, what is that?
Is TJ a radio chemist?
Okay.
You have one more.
Shit.
What is it?
Who's up?
Yeah, that was my first pick.
Someone picked Maria, the mental health therapist.
Yeah.
My bad.
Who's?
Yeah, we're getting.
No, wait.
Nobody took Maria.
There's Medina, the mental health therapist.
Yeah, give me Maria, the mental health therapist.
Okay.
I don't care what a radio chemist does.
Well, radio waves are a thing.
Sure.
With sound.
So Maria's...
Oh.
I kind of do care, then.
Well, that whole page is gone.
Okay.
All right.
Am I up?
Yep.
All right.
Are you?
Who'd you take, KB? Maria? Maria. Maria. Okay. All right. Am I up? Yep. All right. Who'd you take, KB?
Maria?
Maria.
Maria.
Okay.
You got two picks though, right?
All right.
And that one.
Yep.
All right.
Sneaking back around.
All right.
I'm going to go hometown girl here.
Give me Taylor, the recruiter from Chicago, Illinois.
If things don't work out, hit me up, Taylor.
Nice.
Good play. Good play. Good play., hit me up, Taylor. Nice. Good play.
Good play.
Good play.
Good play.
Building a roster.
Okay.
Tomorrow we'll have Che maybe put our team's grades.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Grade our drafts tomorrow.
Okay.
I'm going to go with Taylor.
Damn, dude.
Good pick.
It's getting tough.
It's getting tough.
You know what?
I'm going to go with Rachel, the ICU nurse.
Nurses are hot.
Just because of how she has her hands on her hips, too.
That tells me a lot about her.
From Honolulu.
She's sassy.
Honolulu, she's sassy.
Two Hawaiian women.
Nurses are hot.
She looks like a good time.
Is that like a thing?
Wait.
There's a difference.
Joey lives in Hawaii?
Where do we get this info?
Her bio says Rachel doesn't just live in Hawaii like Joey.
Like from Friends?
Like the...
The Bachelor lives in Hawaii?
Fuck!
She likes Friends.
You should have known this.
That was an incredible pick.
By who?
Whoa.
Titus.
The Hawaiian.
The guy lives in Hawaii?
Oh, you picked the Hawaiian?
First.
No, he's a Philly guy.
Oh, yeah, yeah.
What Hawaiian?
Is there a second?
There are multiple Hawaiians.
Oh, shit.
The actual Hawaiian.
She's from Hawaii.
Wait.
It does say she likes friends.
Now I'm confused.
I was making a joke about her.
Oh, yeah.
It says on there she does like friends.
All right, Arian.
Your pick.
So the dude lives in Hawaii?
I don't know.
Yeah, I'm going to go with...
Philly.
Joey. I'm going to go with... I'm going to go with Erica.
Goddamn you.
From Jersey.
Goddamn you.
Even though she got a dog.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, we know what you mean.
Yeah, very cute young lady right there.
All right.
Zah?
All right. Za? All right.
I am scrambling a little bit because I have my eye on Taylor.
Mook, I wanted Taylor so bad.
Amen.
All right.
Let's go with Jess.
Yeah, the recruiter, the Chicago.
No, San Diego executive assistant? Yeah, he was talking about the one. Oh, sorry. Yeah, sorry. I was reading the Taylor thing. Yeah, the recruiter, the Chicago. No, San Diego executive assistant?
Yeah, he was talking about one. Oh, sorry, yeah, sorry.
I was reading the Taylor thing.
Yeah, the San Diego, San Diego.
Oh, Big Swifty.
Okay, good pick.
Big Swifty with the Yorkapoo.
All right.
Apparently I picked someone that got voted off.
Nick?
A lot of you did, yeah.
Yeah?
I stopped telling you.
Nick?
Ah, shit, man.
I don't really care anymore.
Yep, agreed. I like my squad. I don't really care anymore. Yep.
Agreed.
I like my squad.
I'm not taking anybody else.
You got to pick someone.
Fuck.
Throw the numbers off.
I will take Nat.
Nat.
Okay.
My initials.
Best player on the board.
Whoa.
Oh, shit.
Master's degree.
Number one.
I think she's out.
What?
Is she a man, Shay?
Good job. Sleeps 12 hours a night. Master's degree. Well, no. Master's degree. Number one. I think she's out. What, is she a man, Che? Good job.
Sleeps 12 hours a night.
Master's degree.
Well, no, it's not.
It's too many hours.
That's depression.
No, no, that's good.
That's depression, and she's out.
She's out?
Yeah, she's out.
All right, the data's wrong.
What are you going off of?
Damn.
She sleeps and works, and that's all she does.
No way she sleeps 12 hours.
Come on.
No, not a chance.
I'm calling Capo now.
Carissa, 24, marketing director, Abbotsford, British Columbia.
Oh, fuck.
That's who I was going to say.
We'll go to Canada.
That'll be a good story, right?
When was this taped?
Around Krista's time.
That's why I wanted her because her birthday is Christmas.
Oh.
Fuck.
That is a good pick.
That throws a wrench into what I got going on.
Shit.
Okay. I'll go with
Sam.
Okay.
She loves pizza and margaritas and she has big breasts.
Oh, what? Is that what it says?
No, the pizza and margaritas is true though.
Okay.
Bust. Busty.
And my last pick.
Oh, I don't know about the one who wants to become a mom soon.
I'm a fan of Sam.
I like Sam.
Sam feels like great value.
All these women are equally beautiful.
They are all beautiful.
You know what?
All right, I'll take Chandler.
Nice pick.
Go with a little diversity on my board.
Nice pick. Yep. I'll go with Chandler. Nice pick. Go with a little diversity on my board. Nice pick.
Yep.
I'll go with Chandler.
She is over dating apps, ready to find a connection in real life.
Her perfect date would be a night baking desserts with her boyfriend.
Love it.
All right.
Brandon, last round.
What is Talia?
What do you mean?
What's an esthetician?
Isn't that like plastic surgery?
Is that like eyebrows and shit?
Eyelashes?
I'm taking Zoe because Zoe looks like Carla from Scrubs,
and it's one of my favorite shows, and I want to honor her.
Sure.
Good pick.
All right, Nick.
Give me Edwina.
Yep, good pick.
That's Wynne in her name.
She was born in Liberia.
Love that.
Kyle, Liberia fact?
Their flag looks like the U.S.'s.
Cool.
Is that where we were in?
Bazaar.
Yes, sir.
Oh, isn't it airing?
No, it's you.
Oh, shit.
I thought it was airing before me.
All right, we're running out.
Who is open?
I'm going to go with...
I'm going to go with Sandra because she has the lightest skin out of the ones left.
Okay.
All right.
Fourth on the big board.
Arian.
My brother.
Last pick.
I don't even know who the fuck is open, Cass.
Is Zoe open?
No, you got Star, Talia, Kyra. I like open. Is Zoe open? No, Brant took her.
Star, Talia, Kyra.
I like Star.
I like Star.
Star.
Okay, Star. Star is a good one.
Mental health counselor.
Okay.
Another one?
There ain't no way.
Coach him up.
Okay, Talia, Kayla, and Kyra are the last three.
Kayla, Kyra.
All right.
Kayla was previously in a serious relationship for eight years.
Now she is hoping to find the man she could spend the rest of her life with.
She loves Harry Potter.
Kyra likes going out to a bar or staying in.
Wow.
Oh, one of those introverts.
Introvert.
Extrovert.
Diverse.
Switches it up.
You never know what you're going to get.
She also likes going to the beach and comedy.
All right, I'll take Kyra because she.
She's got a lot going on.
She's got a lot going on. She can go along with anybody.
She likes inside and outside.
How can you keep up with her?
I mean, she likes to stay at home playing Sims.
That's weird.
Okay.
Kayla and –
Kayla and Talia.
Talia.
Three, two –
Give me Kayla.
All right.
This is irrelevant.
All right.
No, Talia. Oh, Talia is. Talia is K All right. This is irrelevant. All right. No.
Talia.
Oh, Talia is. Talia is.
That's his last pick.
Yeah.
All right.
That was probably the worst thing we've ever done.
That was bad.
That was bad.
We should have pre-recorded that.
Yep.
Or just take it off.
Yeah, so we didn't even know who was going to win?
No.
And we don't even know what we're going to do with them.
What the fuck?
Steven, just put our teams together, and we'll just figure it out later.
I like how much paper we have.
I thought we were doing one-e.
Apologize to everyone.
Yep.
That sucked.
Loser of this has to drive to next year's Super Bowl.
Yeah.
How do you lose?
I don't know.
We'll figure it out.
Might as well have fun with it and do something with the elimination.
I think you're into The Bachelor.
Yes.
Tomorrow, we've spent so much time on The Bachelor.
Tomorrow, we will have all of our teams set.
Steven will put it together, and then we'll figure out a punishment.
I'm going to send hype messages to my team.
Yeah.
Pump them up.
This is weird.
How can we forgive people for doing that?
I will black out on Friday's show.
Oh.
Anybody else want to?
Let's black out, man. Get really drunk else want to? Let's black out, man.
Get really drunk.
Get really drunk.
Let's black out right now.
You want to right now?
I'm down.
All right.
Okay.
You still have to do the act.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, that's easy money.
Is it?
Easy money, cuz.
Is it?
We're all rooting against you.
Yeah, we're all rooting against you.
That's my whole career, dawg.
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What else we got?
Arian, can I have Steve Slayton's number?
Oh, good question.
I think you're a cool cat, man.
I got Haxie first.
Just off GP, I don't ever give people a number out, but yeah, I think he's mine.
Thank you.
That's my dog.
What you need it for?
I want him in my crew.
I'll slide him a text. All right. right thank you he just called me the other day actually oh hell yeah yeah it's been
a minute yeah shout out steve second favorite player ever who's your first you oh fucking guy
right there we got to make billy do the golf also you're just you're lying he's your favorite
player ever steve slayton i love steve slayton yeah he is he's your favorite player ever. Steve Slayton? I love Steve Slayton. Yeah, he is.
He's your favorite player.
Love that.
Not Pat White?
Dog.
I liked Steve Slayton.
Okay.
Pat White was also awesome.
Noel Devine?
I like Steve Slayton more.
Amos Zaroway?
I love Famous Amos.
We'll have Billy. Dude from Weirton?
Which dude?
Owen Schmidt?
Schwincy?
Oh, yeah.
Quincy Wilson?
Wilson, yeah.
Yeah, yeah. We'll have Billy do the gauntlet, toowenzie? Oh, yeah. Schwenzie Wilson? Wilson, yeah. Yeah, yeah.
We'll have Billy do the gauntlet, too.
Billy, he already has gotten in, like, three fights playing basketball.
Yeah, Aaron, you guys were screaming for, like, 30 minutes.
No, no, no, I don't scream, but I will talk shit.
Yeah.
It's one of my favorite things to do.
I heard him screaming.
I heard him screaming.
Billy was screaming.
Someone was.
I was just talking shit.
It was, like, maybe five hours that he's been in here,
and he already is like beefing with anyone on the basketball team.
Yeah, he don't got a lot of finesse in his game.
No.
He just – he even throws the ball at the rim.
He don't even really shoot it.
Were you surprised how sweet Big T's jumper is?
Well, I shouldn't call it a jumper.
I shouldn't call it a jumper.
That threw me.
No, he can shoot.
It's a set shot, though.
That's okay.
You need those on your team.
No. He threw me for a loop. You got a decent shot for a jumper. That threw me. No, he can shoot. It's a set shot, though. That's okay. You need those on your team. He threw me for a loop.
You got a decent shot for a football player.
Time out.
I got a great shot.
Yeah.
Fuck if I'm a football player or not.
You do have a great shot.
For a football player.
It was a compliment.
That was backhand.
It was tightest backhand.
No, it was backhand.
It was tightest backhand.
For a football player, you shoot okay.
I was saying, like, every football player I ever see shoot a basketball,
they're too strong and they can't shoot.
I'm a baller.
No, I grew up on the court.
Yeah.
Yeah, I got a shot.
Yeah, I'm sorry.
That probably came out a little more harsh than I meant.
Don't squash it.
It just meant on some light.
30 seconds.
30 seconds.
Fuck you, I can shoot.
No, you can shoot.
You did say that before.
Or fight.
30 seconds or fight.
And we might have to, you know what?
I'm going to take the fucking fight on the light area
well fuck it let's just fight billy billy showed up yesterday and i think he had been like
in his head just like practicing in the mirror saying like complimenting this office
because he walked in to the first door it's just the bar right there and he's just like wow this office really
is nice and i was just like bill you you haven't seen it yet that's my least favorite yeah that's
the worst part of the office but it was like a scripted line that he was gonna drop right on
like a normal good person yeah wow this office is really nice it really is nice there's a big
science fair banner hanging where he's gonna to throw the football. No, he can stand under it.
We'll make that work.
Yeah.
You don't need to throw it that high.
I think he's going to have to.
Yeah, what?
Brandon.
No, he'll be fine.
What if he's high as hell?
His arm goes over the top.
No.
Not even close.
Fine.
Fine.
It's barely at...
Okay.
Hopefully Malasek will actually be good today.
He won't.
He was too busy Recording himself playing guitar
With his dog behind him
So he could get a fucking crumb of pussy
Wait he did that?
The biggest cry for help I've ever seen
Wait
Let's see that video
Yeah go to his tweet
I love him to death
No man
Oh no
It's just reeks of desperation
Malasek is a dog person
That you do not like
Gotcha
He's
He fucks his dog
He be like licking him in the mouth
Yeah
Oh yeah What the fuck is that? Why do people do that shit? And they'll be like licking him in the mouth. Oh, yeah.
What the fuck is that?
Why do people do that shit?
And they'll be like, the dog's mouth is cleaner.
It's cleaner.
Don't care.
Fuck out of here.
Yeah, there's no way that's true.
Look, with the dog behind him playing guitar, you know he put on like the fucking alpha.
He needs to get laid so bad.
Oh, gee.
Oh, no, gee.
I'm going to tell you why this is bad. He's not really even playing. No, he's not. Wait, Jay. Oh, no, Jay.
I'm going to tell you why this is bad.
He's not really even playing.
No, he's not.
Wait, what does he do?
He has a loop pedal.
Okay, okay. Maybe I spoke too soon.
Maybe he's going to start killing it.
Okay.
Oh, yeah.
A little Dave Matthews band.
Is that what this is?
Oh.
Crash?
Yeah, Crash.
I spoke too soon.
Crash into me.
Kill that shit.
He was doing the bass.
That's what it was.
And look, he like, oh, he rubs his face.
Like, oh.
You got to wait.
Come back around.
Y'all hating.
He's killing it.
I like it.
Y'all hating.
No, no.
He's good, but he's killing it.
I thought he was playing, but he was just doing the bass.
I didn't know he had a loop pedal.
He's doing this for malicious reasons.
Two things could be true.
He's killing it.
There he is.
This is the most desperate cry for pussy of all time.
You know, like he did this and his dog wasn't in frame.
Yeah, he's playing Dave Matthews with his dog in frame sitting on a bench press.
Yeah, you're sitting on a bench press.
I'm not allowed to have hobbies.
I can't do stuff.
I can't share my hobbies.
I usually use this for lifting.
Hey, you're killing that shit.
That's a guitar bench for piano, guitar, music.
And lifting weights.
I don't lift weights.
I enjoyed that.
I like to do stuff.
That was impressive.
I had a fun last night I wanted to share with people.
What was it?
I like to do stuff. I was impressive. I had a fun last night I wanted to share with people. It was.
I like to do stuff.
I haven't touched a woman in like nine months.
I'm not doing this for girls.
Right.
That's not my choice, though.
Did any girls hit you up? I got a lot of guys messaging me.
That was kind of cool.
That was basically it.
I liked it a lot.
That shit happened.
I want you to sing it, too.
You're good, but you're trying to get pussy. I'm not trying to get pussy. Why did he film it, then. That shit happened. I want you to sing it too. You're good, but that was a, you're trying to get pussy.
I'm not trying to get pussy.
Why did he film it then?
I think that's a mistake.
This also is my first one.
I put a couple of these out.
Exactly.
Right.
But it's not because I want to get chicks.
Don't be upset that you're fishing for pussy.
Stop trying to say that I'm trying to get pussy.
I'm not trying to get pussy.
Try it hard.
Wait, so you want it on the record that you don't want pussy?
I don't like chicks.
All right.
I believe you fully. This is not for girls. Trying hard. Wait, so you want it on the record that you don't want pussy? I don't like chicks. All right.
I believe you fully.
This is not for girls.
This is just for fun.
You need to say that in the tweet for guys eyes only.
Guys eyes only.
That's what I do.
I better not get pussy for that. Gus for the dudes.
This is what I'm doing.
Shout out all my guys.
If you get pussy from that, you have to delete the tweet.
Deal.
Deal.
Fine.
No, you can't come.
If you get pussy from that, you can't come. Deal. Deal. Fine. No, you can't come. If you get pussy from that,
you can't come.
Okay.
That's wild
because you have to think
about Big Cat
in the middle of the show
in order to honor that deal.
No, that wasn't for girls.
You were trying to get pussy.
What was it for, Jake?
For fun.
I had a good time.
What made that more fun?
Getting Todd watching,
you have to watch
to the end of the clip.
Then just not post it.
Yeah.
Well, I think it's fun.
It's like a cool thing I wanted to share.
Commentary.
Oh!
No, he wasn't.
Oh, and you ended with come into you?
That's part of the song.
All right.
I strike everything I said.
He was not trying to get pussy.
I've never seen him try to get pussy, which has always been weird to me.
Yeah, he's like.
Hold on.
I've watched him reluctantly.
Yeah, he doesn't approach women.
You're a good-looking guy.
May I speak?
Yeah.
I've seen him French.
What?
No.
What is this?
Oh, I heard about this.
What is French?
French kiss.
Kiss with tongue.
The box.
Oh, yeah.
No, we don't have to talk about that.
That's crazy.
You Frenched?
At the box.
I've talked to girls before, but that was not for women.
You picked up the phone and brought it to your face and said,
as I come into you.
I have done this before.
I don't know.
This is not like a new thing.
He has done it before.
I think you killed a girl.
Thank you.
Yeah.
I just want it on the record.
I don't even know why I come in anymore.
You have the highest hit rate on this show.
Yeah, you really do.
Look, your total yak minutes can't be more than 70,
and every single one of them has been incredible.
The guitar stuff is just a quirky little fun thing that I do
that I don't think a lot of people know.
Oh, it's a quirky little fun thing. I That's okay. It's a funny little fun thing.
I like collecting baseball cards.
It's a thing.
Adopting dogs and shredding on guitars.
It's a thing that I like to do that I don't think a lot of people know that I do.
So every once in a while I like to share it with everybody that follows me,
and it's a fun thing for me to do.
Is that okay with everybody else?
I want you to make him keep doing it.
Yeah, no, he's got to do it, but he's just got to say guys only.
All right, next one we'll say for dudes eyes only.
Yeah.
What song are you going to play?
It comes to me randomly.
Yeah.
Are we good?
Yeah, are you going to play goalie today?
Yeah, I'm going to try.
I've been really bad lately.
You have.
I've been really bad.
I don't know what's going on.
You need to stop Billy to the point that he gets a temper tantrum.
Okay.
I try.
I've just been bad.
I don't want to.
I've been trying.
It's a big day.
It's Billy and Arian.
I know.
All right, here.
I got something to help.
Malasek, right now there's probably 13,000 dudes watching this,
so do it for the dudes.
Okay?
There's maybe 12 girls total Watching the act
At most 25
This is your moment for the dudes
You can pick up so many sweet dudes from this
I do love dudes
Are you gay?
I'm not gay
I could understand your confusion
I've said before I wish I was
You know you can be man I wish I was. That's your boy. No, you can be, man.
I wish I was.
Buddy, you can be.
Yeah, you're allowed to be.
It's totally fine.
My mom texts me all the time about this show.
Really?
Yeah, she's like, what are you doing to yourself?
Can you, TJ, can you pull up the clip for Arias so we can hear it?
They've been made?
Those have been Twitter speakers.
Those have been made for weeks.
They just had it in a whole state.
I knew this time would come.
I love you, Mal.
I love you guys, too.
That was a genuine, that was one of the most genuine ways I've ever heard anybody explain anything.
Like, it's just a fun thing that I like doing.
Wait, wait, your mom, she probably, does your mom, like, come at you for?
What, not talking to girls?
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
What'd she say?
She's like, you're a weird guy.
Like, mom, you made me.
She, like, begs me to go out every weekend and, like, talk to girls.
And I'm like, I'm not.
Wait, so what's the, give me the, give me the, what's the what's the what do you i it doesn't interest me wait okay hold on i thought
it was a word for that i thought it was my whole thing is like i don't i have no interest in like
putting in all that effort to like go talk to girls if if a girl comes up to me i'll talk to
a girl is it easier to talk to a guy yeah of course wait time out because i thought he was
joking no you're not gay no i'm not gay and there's nothing wrong with like for real right Yeah, of course. Wait, time out, because I thought he was joking.
No.
You're not gay.
No, I'm not gay.
And there's nothing wrong with me, like, for real.
Right.
No, I know.
Yeah, I know, but I'm not.
You're not interested in talking to girls.
If it's a moment arises where a woman is around me and she strikes up a conversation, I'll talk to a girl.
I have no problem with that, but I'm not going to go out with the soul, like a Nikki Smokes, for example, not to.
You're not motivated by picking on her. Correct.
I never go to a bar with the intention of going home with a woman.
You're a guy's guy.
Yeah.
I like to go out with my boys, have a good time.
You're just trying to do you.
Gamble on sports and drink a couple beers and go home.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Find women to be very exhausting.
So you don't get like...
Read.
You don't get excited?
Ever?
What, with women?
I mean, just...
I mean, whatever you get excited about.
You get horny.
Yeah.
You get what Arians ask. Yeah. What Aryan's asking.
Describe the last few boners you've gotten.
What happens when that happens?
What do you mean, what happens?
What do you do?
What do you do to win a horn?
It goes away, and then it goes away.
Yeah.
He has a dog, so you just.
So he has a dog.
So I got every reply was like, you fuck your dog?
Yeah.
Hold on, because.
Again, that's not on me.
This is fucking.
That was you saying, well. Well. I asked you if you had sexual activity with your dog you just
well the horniness away like you just waited out well is it away oh you jerk
off guy he's oh he's a weird guy he doesn't he doesn't use he hasn't used
soap or shampoo for no shame I've used shampoo he has No soap for seven years. No body wash in the shower. There's a lot going on here. What do you do in the shower?
Water.
Loiters.
Loiters.
Now, Arian.
That's not clean.
Arian, you're probably saying to yourself, this guy's a weird guy.
We have something we want to show you that will confirm everything.
No soap.
Oh, we're doing this?
Wow.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, shit.
You think we're doing this?
Yeah.
Might as well.
Let's hear this Jake Malasek.
So wait, he went in a Twitter.
You ever had a threesome?
She was.
Yeah, I also have not done that.
I'm a pretty vanilla guy, guys.
Man, now, Jake, you got to step it up.
I know, I know, I know.
You got to see, you got to get to 2B.
I got to experience more of the world out there.
I'm glad.
Who are you doing with?
Am I getting to pick anybody? In the world? Like. Oh, God. Who are you doing with? You too, my boy.
Am I getting to pick anybody?
Mm-hmm.
In the world?
Like celebrities and stuff too?
Yeah, in the world, Jake.
All right, let's see.
I'll do...
Hmm.
That's a good question.
Let's do Rachel McAdams.
Oh, who is that?
Who is that? They don't know who that is. Rachel McAdams invited this dude that's my first love guys come on she was in the
notebook
oh my god
he thought we were right
pause it pause it he thought he was going to
sway the opinion of
the notebook
like that was his ace in the hole
he's in the
twitter space it's called we talking
crazy in here
she's in the notebook oh is called we talking crazy in here It ain't nice to know you. Just pick Rihanna's hot. No, I never said Rihanna wasn't hot, Josh.
Who y'all second person, bro?
Is it a guy?
Do I have to pick a guy or a girl?
Wait, wait, wait.
We want two seconds.
Two seconds.
You have to hear this guy's reaction.
He could be a guy.
He could be a girl.
No, you could pick another girl.
Oh, no, he could be a guy.
It could be whatever.
It sounds definitely a guy.
Lord of Hell and Kate.
Lord of Hell and Kate.
And then he picked.
Who'd you pick?
Gosling.
Brian Gosling.
In your dream threesome. Yes, you picked Rachel McAdams.
He said he wanted to just hang out in the corner.
His dream threesome was Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams.
He watched them a lot.
And he just wants to watch.
Look, I folded that.
Everybody got their kink, man, I guess.
Do the hell he can.
There's a word for that in a porn joke.
Cock, cock, cock.
Yep, heard that one before.
Are you into that?
No! It was your fantasy.
You can pick anyone
in the world. I was going to say, you pick two people you want
to watch. And one of them's a dude.
Know the hell he can.
That's my favorite. Are we going to do this thing or not?
Yeah, we're going to do it. I love you, Mal.
Yeah, man. Good dude. He's the best. He's my favorite. Are we going to do this thing or not? Yeah, we're going to do it. I love you, Malison. Yeah, man.
Good dude.
He's the best.
He's the best.
Good dude.
He'll do anything for fucking pussy.
I don't think he will.
I actually don't think so.
Use this anger.
I don't even know if he has anger.
No, I don't think so.
I don't think he gets mad.
I don't think he feels anger.
He just got to spend 20 minutes with the boys.
That's really what he wants.
He's so funny. Boys funny He really is the greatest dude
He's like a great guy to have around
That's amazing
Shout out to him
Very genuine guy seems like
What's the ad that we got added?
Where do I have to go?
We have High Noon and then Nick has the other one okay so do you which is there anyone you want me to do first it's the uh one in your
left hand the farthest left see you guys all right guys it's time to talk about our friend
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Steven Singer Jewelers, a real jeweler you can trust.
That's IHatesStevenSinger.com.
Get your girl a rose or guy, anybody.
All right.
So, Arian.
Yeah.
We'll have someone walk you, be with you so that you can, you don't get confused with the order of these things.
But I'll talk you through it real quick.
Omar?
Yeah, but let me talk you through it.
And then Brandon will go around with you while you do it.
So, you're starting with the cornhole right in front of us.
You have to stand where the bags are.
You just have to hit one.
Easy money.
Okay.
Then you go to soccer.
There will be three balls set up.
You have to shoot each ball before you can then get off that line.
So if you miss the first three shots then every ball is
live so then you can like you can score from anywhere you know what i mean okay yeah and then
as soon as you make it it's over yeah then you're gonna grab that red bat and you gotta hit a home
run which is anything over the where this studio is okay who's pitching me you throw to yourself
throw to yourself then you have to stand on the court with a football,
and you have to hit one of the body armor bottles.
Just one?
One.
On the table over there?
But you have to hit it directly,
so you can't hit it off a bounce back or anything,
and you have to get your own rebound.
So if you throw it and miss, you have to go get the ball and come back.
All right.
If it's a table, it doesn't count.
It doesn't count if it has to hit the bottle directly.
Then it's a three-pointer on this side, three-pointer on the other side.
Then you sit down, and there's Sporkle, which is trivia,
where you have to just get ten questions right.
Which are?
You have to get them.
You have to just say the answers.
Show them a Sporkle.
And also, if you want Billy to go first, we can make him go first.
So, look.
So, obviously, the answers wouldn't be there.
They'd be blank.
But you sit down.
It's like nine NBA teams named after animals.
So, you just got to start rattling off whichever category you think your best at.
And I'll be doing that here?
Yeah.
Gotcha.
And you just have to get 10.
So, it could be any category.
There's usually some easy categories
that you'll be able to rip through.
Run in and sit in this chair.
Yeah, sit in this chair so you can see the TV better.
All right, ready to run?
Let's make Malasek or somebody wear one of those shirts.
We just launched these shirts.
Malasek, put on one of these shirts.
These are maybe my favorite that we've ever done.
So we just launched these, the Yak Gauntlet shirts.
These are awesome.
They're in the chat. Please go buy one if you feel so inclined it says yak and the flame and then all the sports are at
the bottom yeah so then all oh shit i didn't even notice the sports it's fired oh the color scheme
is based off of like 90s olympic stuff yeah this is awesome so zoom in here i'm gonna buy so the
yak gauntlet and then it's got it's got the wiffle ball, the basketball, the cornhole, football, sporkle.
It's the Yak.
So here, hold on.
Let me get the whole thing.
These are awesome shirts.
Are those shirts?
Yeah.
Yak Gauntlet, now on sale.
Incredible shirts.
And do we give them to everybody that partakes?
We can.
So you can be like...
You should, yeah.
Just like Julian Edelman.
Buy it and wear it.
Yeah.
He'd look so good in it.
Yeah, he would.
I don't care if Arian beats my record.
If Billy does, I'll cry.
Oh, no.
I need Billy to do horribly.
Yeah.
Yeah, that would be...
I need Billy to get so frustrated.
Arian's a great dude, though, so he would be...
Yeah, I don't want him to get mad either.
Does he need a trial run?
No, no, he don't get trial run.
Or, I mean, someone else to go before.
Fights is going to be here tomorrow.
He's going to be here Wednesday, Thursday, Friday,
so he'll be on the act.
He'll do it as well.
Love that.
He'll be good. You guys are doing some skits well yeah
love to do some sketches all all the rest of the week love that
by the way nick uh i need you to do that baseball video yes of course say when you're gonna have i
so for pmt we had the PFT pitch against UIC.
In the baseball video, I bet you never thought you'd have this happen.
So we were able to afford Joe Buck for 90 seconds.
Oh, hell yeah.
So he kicks it to you.
Oh, hell yeah.
He says your name, maybe incorrectly, but it doesn't matter.
He said your name.
Perfectly fine with that.
And he kicks it to me?
He says I'll send it down to Nick Fram.
And then I got the rest of the 50 minutes?
It's like 12.
Oh.
No, it's like 15.
Easy.
Yeah.
Thanks, Joe.
Yeah.
Thanks, Joe.
Yeah, all right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
There you go.
You got it.
Woo-hoo-hoo.
Yeah, yeah.
Is he a local guy?
Joe?
To us?
No.
No.
He lives in St. Louis.
Florida?
St. Louis?
That's pretty cool that he still lives in St. Louis. Florida? St. Louis?
That's pretty cool that he still lives in St. Louis, by the way.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's the man.
We had him on tomorrow's PMT.
He's the best.
He's one of those guys, and I said it to him, if I had to think of who directly helped my career,
Joe Buck and Scott Van Pelt are very high up there.
Because those two interviews
were like oh these guys yeah legit yeah yeah but you kind of helped him too though a little bit
i'll say it yeah no you mentioned it that right around that 2016 time was the joe buck renaissance
yeah where he was kind of yeah trying to show people he's not the dork everyone thought he was
yeah that's true um he mentioned that so
he kind of owes us some money yeah uh all right you ready let's do it
all right tj you ready yes all right three two one go oh no oh oh shit oh no come on Go. Oh, no. Oh. Oh. Oh. Shit.
Oh, no.
Come on, Malasek. Get a real oh, no out.
Record.
Oh, my God.
It's over.
My record's done.
Malasek failed me.
Fuck us.
Oh, my God.
God.
Fuck.
It's over.
He did say it was light work.
This is charming. Oh, that's big. It's over. He did say it was light work. This is charming.
Uh oh.
That's big.
That's big.
I need him to miss like four or five times to have a chance.
It's-
Holy shit.
Fucked.
Hey, you're on record pace.
33 seconds.
Don't help it, Sporkle.
Don't help it, Sporkle.
He said, oh fuck.
Comes for everyone.
He backed up.
Nice jumper for a football.
Got it.
Other one.
Oh, no.
Him in mid-field. Take the ball. Oh for everyone. He backed up.
Nice jumper for a football player.
Got it. Other one.
Oh no!
Him in mid lane!
Three balls!
That might cost, yeah that's five seconds right there.
He's gonna make this one though.
He's got a nice shot.
Ooh. Ooh.
He does.
Wet. Ish.
Dry.
Oh no.
Got it.
In here.
Come on.
Hurry.
Run, run, run, run.
It's down.
It's down.
It's down.
Eight majority owners of the following teams.
I have no idea.
Terrell, over here.
Sidekicks for Supergames.
T.O.
T.O. teams.
I can't read it.
Who'd T.O. play for?
Philly, San Francisco, Buffalo, Cincinnati.
How much do I need? You need 10 total for hitting a T.O. play for.
No, no, no, boys. No, you're good. Cowboys put in Cowboys foremost.
Watch Twitch streamers in 2023. You're Twitch. No. All right.
Seven rappers to be in G unit at one point one point. 50, Tony Ayo, Young Buck.
Seven?
I only know of four.
Who's the owner of the Cowboys?
Jerry Jones.
Do you know the owner of the Colts?
Jim Mercer?
Yep.
Do you know the owner of the Knicks?
You need one more.
No.
Okay.
We need one more. You should Okay. You need one more.
You should have told us you can't see.
Yeah, I can't see. Sidekick
of Batman. Yep. Robin.
There we go. Bang.
Great time. 213.
Wait, wait, wait. Why didn't you tell us you can't see?
Yeah, what the hell?
I didn't know that the letters were going to be fucking one font.
Damn. That was an incredible time.
That was incredible. Thanks, man.
Fuck. You nailed that. Yeah. Damn. That was an incredible time. That was incredible. Thanks, man. Fuck.
You nailed that.
I did.
Yeah.
Wow.
Shout out to me.
You are.
Yeah, I can't even read this.
Oh, that felt like one of the fastest.
It was.
It was.
If you take out.
We should probably take out our secondary times, right?
It's getting cluttered.
Yeah, there's a real leaderboard. This is just all scores that we have all scores so you are one two three you're in
fourth all time love that fourth all time what do i get a yak gauntlet shirt look at that
no you crush that 3xl that's your size right perfect size all right should we we have Billy do it? Mm-hmm. All right, Billy.
What happened to Malasek, man?
He's lost all his power.
I loved talking him up.
I was rooting against you a little bit.
I'm sorry, Arian, but I do have the number one time.
Yeah, I feel you, man.
Just air competitor.
I want one of a... You want us to explain?
You know everything?
Do you know all the things?
Or do you want me to tell you?
Sit down, sit down, sit down.
All right, so, Billy, you're going cornhole.
You've got to get one in.
Soccer, you have those three balls right there.
You have to shoot all those three balls.
If you miss all three, then you can score from anywhere.
Okay.
So, like, every ball is live.
You can score from, like, as close as one.
But you're done if you score.
You just score one.
Yeah, you're done if you score.
But you have to shoot at least those three first.
You got to hit a home run.
See where Arian was shooting from.
Yep.
You got to throw the football into the body armor bottle.
You got to hit one.
You have to hit one.
You have to hit it on the fly, though.
You can't rebound or you can't hit the table and make them fall down.
You got to hit the ball or the bottle.
Yeah, and you have to go get your own rebound on the football. Three-pointer, three-pointer, and then you come in here and do Sp fall down. You got to hit the ball or the bottle. Yeah, and you have to go get your own rebound on the football.
Three-pointer, three-pointer, and then you come in here and do Sporkle.
Ten questions right of trivia.
We'll give you a little help with that.
Okay.
All right, and Arian's going to move.
Arian will sit back in that seat so you can sit here for Sporkle.
Okay.
Okay.
All right.
Good luck, Bill.
Arian, you go back there so he can see the TV.
Oh, he's stretching. Arian, you crushed that. so he can see the TV. Oh, he's stretching.
Arian, you crushed that.
Thanks, man.
He's stretching.
First three-pointer at 33 seconds.
You were at like 54 seconds.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Basketball legend.
Was that the fastest before trivia or was that other guy?
Two-finger Brett, I think, was in here at like 36 seconds.
Yeah.
So you probably had the second fastest time on the court.
I don't think your record's as safe as we think it is. Yeah. So you probably had the second fastest time on the court. I don't think your record's as safe as we think it is.
No.
If Arian could read or told us that he couldn't read before, it might have.
Although we.
I can read the letters.
Sorry.
Your eyes.
Yeah.
Arian's capable of shaving a lot of time off of basketball, too.
Yeah.
He knows.
He knows.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
As a matter of fact, we run in games After the science fair If anybody wanna come
Holla at your boy
There might be a
Issue with that
Oh damn
We have
Three barrels of hay
That we have to put out
On this court
That's right
Wait a minute
You were doing it on the hay
Three barrels of hay
That's the shit
Bales of hay
Bales of hay
Bales
Bales of hay
We
PFT and I definitely
This is a future us problem
Okay
Because my birthday's today
His birthday's tomorrow
Jerry After Dark's
On Tuesday nights
So we're like
Oh great
We'll do a birthday stream
So
At 8 o'clock tonight
Everyone tune in
8 o'clock central
9 o'clock eastern
We are going to try to find
39 needles in a haystack
Is there any documented Frame of reference for how easy or hard this is?
Nope.
Okay.
And then every needle we find, we have to eat a mini cupcake.
How are you going about finding them?
Yeah.
I don't know.
We also are going to be dressed as farm animals.
Which one are you doing?
I think I might be the pig.
Okay.
It could take a long ass time.
I mean, you're looking for a needle in a haystack.
Literally a needle in a haystack.
Yeah, that's insane.
39 of them.
39 of them.
39 of them.
That's kind of wild.
That's a lot.
That's a ton of hay.
I said, dude, there's so-
I didn't know a haystack was so big.
There's so much hay.
The hay is ridiculous.
It's an insane amount of hay.
How much does a bale of hay run?
Who the fuck got hay in Chicago?
Paige.
I don't know where they got it.
Paige is the best.
A lot of farmland.
Shout out to Paige for getting the hay.
Paige is our office manager.
She's incredible.
Brandon, how much is a bale of hay?
Yeah.
Okay, so everyone tune into the Gary After Dark tonight.
Yeah.
Should be interesting.
All right, Bill, you ready?
I'm going to pull up for that.
I'm going to pull up.
Yeah. You can't. You'm going to pull up. Yeah.
How big is the needle?
I think it's just a regular needle.
Yeah, it's like a syringe.
It's like a tiny needle.
Are you going to prick yourself a million times?
If you need an easy way to end that, just light the hay on fire.
But that's your call with fire safety.
Oh, yeah.
Brandon, remember when you thought hay and straw were the same thing?
What a day that was. What's the difference?
I think you sleep on hay and you eat straw.
Animals?
I mean, I never thought about that.
Straw's for eating.ze for all right three needles
two one go oh it's over oh wow rap it's a rap yep done oh no billy over you start panicking
over oh no rap oh there it is i think that went in. Did it not? He has to acknowledge his own put in.
Bill.
He's building a field.
Nobody's ran out of bags before.
Nobody's run out of bags.
Tim Woods ran out of bags.
Tim Woods has.
He wasn't a K%.
The other one's in.
Help him get the bags, Brandon.
But he's trying to just.
Is he going to self-eliminate?
All right.
Come on, Billy.
Ryan, you grabbed all the bags.
I did.
Hey.
Hey.
All right, Jake.
Oh, my God.
He broke his ankle.
That was so embarrassing.
Oh. Nope. Ceiling. Ceiling. No, Billy. Oh, nope.
Ceiling.
Ceiling.
No, Billy.
Oh, no.
You knew he'd argue.
Of course.
You knew he'd argue.
You can't hit the ceiling.
Oh, no.
Oh, no.
He's mad.
He's mad.
Really mad. Push those out for him, Fasoli. He's mad. He's mad. Really mad.
Push those out for him, Fasoli.
Push it out.
There it is.
Danger.
He's angry.
He mad as hell.
This is going to make him so mad.
It's not as easy as I thought it was going to be.
Oh, there we go, Billy.
Three-pointer.
Three-pointer.
The football throw, if you miss like three or four in a row,
you start to spiral.
Oh.
Was that air?
That was air.
That was air.
Jesus.
That was air.
Yeah, I'm disappointed in my shooting.
Yeah.
I usually leave.
That's my bad.
That was air.
There we go.
You got it, Bill.
Oh.
Dude, malice is hard to cross, though.
There we go.
There you go, Billy.
Sit right here. Sit right here.
Sit right here.
All right.
Eight mascots for the following schools.
That one looks good.
Oregon State.
Oregon State.
Beavers.
Yep.
Ducks.
Yep.
You got it.
Huskies.
Blue Devils.
Badgers.
Roll Tides.
Crimson.
Cowboys.
Nittany lions what where am i going uh let's see top 10 selling board games that's pretty good seven nhl monopoly
seven teams located nhl teams located in canada wait seven uh um Fuck. Winnipeg Jets.
Yep.
Vancouver Canucks.
Yep.
Montreal Canadiens.
Yep.
And time.
There we go, Billy.
3-0-3.
That was terrible.
No, good second half.
Yeah.
Recovered.
Billy, I think you actually hit the bags before you realized you hit the bags.
It went over?
Yeah.
I thought it went in.
I was really nervous. You saw it? over okay all right hey yo who's the seven rappers in g unit i thought
there was only four um i got yayo 50 buck lloyd banks who else is in june oh game game who else
that's five oh three minutes olivia no, that was a good time.
Four minutes.
Billy, that was a good time.
Oh.
It was the seventh.
You got to show the.
Right below.
Lost to White Sox Dave.
White Sox Dave.
Okay.
You got to show.
Yeah, Chia and White Sox Dave.
I mean, the bags, that was a big.
That was tough.
What happened to Malasek?
That's what we got to show.
He's on a serious slump right now.
Oh, no, dude.
I hit him with the –
You did hit him with the –
He used to be amazing.
I made him fall before I even kicked it.
I want someone to track his slump.
Like, when did this start?
He's on a serious slump right now.
He hasn't made –
He used to make multiple saves every –
He may have went airborne on his ass.
That was smooth, though, Billy.
Yeah, wait.
Can we see what happened?
No, I'm sick.
What happened?
What's wrong?
What happened, man?
Come on.
What's wrong?
Has anyone ever tried that on you?
My football throw was terrible, though.
You actually got it in what, the second time or third time?
No, I was trying to do it sidearm because I knew if I went overhand, I was just going to hit the table.
Believe me, that was a good... Cam Newton, we had to move him on because it got so awkward.
Jake, you all right?
Yeah.
I did see that. Jake, you all right? Yeah. He missed so many times.
I did see that.
Yeah.
You all right, Jake?
Jake, what's going on, buddy?
Did he go airborne on his tuchus?
No, he went.
I got him on a knee.
Jake, what's going on, dude?
I don't know what happened to me.
I know.
It's bad.
It wasn't as embarrassing as the bags, but.
Do you want me to go shoot on you?
No, I don't know.
Get your mojo back?
Wait, you got me.
Oh, yeah, here we go.
Have Brandon shoot on you real quick.
Get your mojo back.
That was smooth, though.
It was.
That was actually a good kick.
Filthy shot, too.
I don't know what happened.
Let Brandon shoot a couple on you.
Get your mojo back.
Yeah.
Let's get your mojo back.
Come on.
Get your mojo back.
You were the crown jewel of this challenge. I Get your mojo back. You were the crown jewel
of this challenge.
I know.
I feel bad.
You were the hardest
I would tell people
like you want to do
the yak gauntlet
well Malasek's
going to stop you.
He's a real motherfucker.
Yeah.
Not anymore.
Go stop Brandon.
Go stop Brandon.
Go stop a few of Brandon's shots.
Nick will you do
the high noon ad?
Yeah.
Boys I'm parched
and I want a high noon.
You can sip on summer flavors in the middle of winter now.
Introducing the all-new High Noon Snowbird Pack featuring a perfect mix of winter and summer flavors.
The eight pack includes two new flavors, raspberry and plum, alongside high noon classics, peach and lemon.
All made with real vodka and real juice.
What?
The Snowbird Pack is a winter exclusive, so get it before the ice melts.
Track down the pack nearest you at
highnoonspirits.com. I might have
a few after this show.
We're supposed to get blackout. We're supposed to get blackout.
We still can. I'm down.
We can't play basketball after?
You've got to talk to Lucas and those guys. I don't know.
You might be able to play for a little bit, but they do have to
stay out. Is this your first week here?
Yeah, dude. This place is awesome.
This is like... Yeah, is awesome. This is like...
Yeah, just shoot.
This is like Peter Pan Neverland.
You don't have to grow up here.
It's pretty dope.
Yeah, I was like, Billy, why don't you move here?
You're like, because I have to grow up somewhere.
Hold a sec.
I don't get it.
He got him again?
Yeah.
Billy, you don't have to grow up.
I'm 39.
Today. Never growing up today. Never growing up. Oh, you don't have to grow up. I'm 39. Today. Never growing up.
Today.
Never growing up.
Oh, he did that on purpose.
Yep.
Oh, Arian, there you go.
He works at Barstool.
Arian is Barstool.
Just facts.
Oh, you're the best non-Barstool person?
No.
I think Delaney was.
He's Barstool.
Billy, you beat Zass, too.
So you're going to be on there. Billy, you beat Zass, too.
So you're going to be on there.
Dude, if I had a better corn.
Before athletic events, I just get this like, not anxiety,
but just intense adrenaline rush.
Yeah.
Terrible for cornhole.
Yeah.
There you go, Aaron.
You're fourth all time. I'm happy with my... If I could see if I had my glasses,
I might have been even better.
Yeah.
Wait.
One, two.
Yeah, he's fourth all time.
Shout out to me, man.
Shout out to you.
That's a fun challenge.
All right.
Let's spin the wheel
because we got to get to the science fair.
I think Malasek needs to get pussy.
He's broken.
Dude, he still hasn't?
No.
He hasn't.
I think that's what he needs.
Wait, what did you say?
He needs pussy?
He hasn't since when?
You said he still hasn't?
What does still mean?
Do you know something?
I have an inside joke with Malasek.
About not getting pussy?
It's not on the inside anymore.
I thought that everyone knew about it.
It hasn't been for a while.
No, Malasek's dope.
Okay, thanks. We agree. Yeah, he knows him. He hasn't been for a while. No, Malasek's dope. Okay, thanks.
We agree.
Yeah, he is dope.
Malasek.
He's a man.
I love you, man.
Love you, Jake.
He's down.
He's so down.
How do we get him up?
Text me last night.
Slide into Malasek's.
No, what does he
actually love, though?
He'd rather have boys
play him.
Yeah, girls.
He likes parlays.
Virginia basketball.
Yeah, he just loves
He plays the guitar. He plays the guitar. Oh, we fucking knowlay's Virginia basketball. Yeah. He just plays the
guitar.
He plays the guitar.
We know.
We know.
Yeah.
Almost.
Yeah.
He will be next.
We get him a
recruiting trip to do
like a photo shoot at
UVA.
That would be.
Well here's the thing.
So Malicek texted me
last night.
He's like hey do you
have some free time in
the next two days.
I have an idea I want
to run by you.
He doesn't realize this
but now I'm going to
have to say yes to
whatever the idea. It could be anything and I i'm gonna have to say yes to whatever the idea
it could be anything and i'm gonna have to say yes to now yeah he said he could he could take
advantage of me he could be like how my idea is like i want i was thinking maybe like i get half
your money i'd be like okay so you have to yeah yeah he's in a place to do you want to do a bar
stool plus your check um all right uh let's spin our wheel can
i talk about the discord real quick yes sorry so rudy hank and myself are running a war zone
tournament uh college war zone tournament this wednesday and friday on the barstool sports twitch
channel um and so we wanted to come up with a place for people that are competing in it
to communicate with each other.
So Phenom,
who's a loyal member of the Yak chat and the anus chat and all the chats.
He's the man.
He built anuses.
Yeah.
He built anuses discord,
right?
Yes.
Oh yeah.
For the last month or so,
he's been building the Yak discord.
So I'm going to put the link in the chat right now,
and then I'll show you what to do once you get in because it's not complicated but there's instructions um this will be a great
place to like submit merch designs if you do merch designs or meme ideas or topic ideas or
videos to watch on the show or anything of that caliber um so once you click the link
that's in the chat if you have discord if not it's super easy to
sign up
It takes you to this page
Is the yak cord there's a ton of stuff in here
There's like hundreds and hundreds of emotes and different chat rooms that you can join
just click on this and pick an icon and
I'll pick the me icon and then it gives you the rules that you have to agree to and once you agree to the rules you have like a bunch of different chat rooms on the side there's
rooms to talk about other shows here mostly sports part of my take ain't a son of a boy dad
we'll keep adding more stuff to it as more ideas come up but this will be a great spot that we'll
use also to look at like if we ever need to test something out with like the dedicated yak fans before we
released it to the public or if we want to like sample merch ideas say hey pick between these
two shirts or something like that like we're going to make this a part of the yak cinematic
universe so please join us please join it and also be nice i guess yeah yeah there's a bunch
of rules and stuff but yeah don't be dumb. Yeah, just be a nice person.
Be normal.
Because I know there's other places online that you can just shit on us and be mean.
But this is supposed to be, we're, it is a collaborative thing.
We want to hear from you guys.
We want to use this to make the show better.
So, yeah, please join.
Yeah, join.
And get a server icon.
Best of what it does.
Shout out to Phenom.
Yeah.
And yeah, TJ will be monitoring.
So like we're going to use ideas from this.
We're going to get feedback.
So we want to make the show as good as possible for the people.
So thank you everyone for listening.
And I know that there's also there's fan run Yak discords that exist already.
But we wanted to have one that we have like full control over.
Like you guys are obviously free to keep doing that and keep talking to each other,
but this is like a central hub
where we can control everything
that's going in and coming out of it.
Awesome.
So thank you, Phenom.
Thank you, everyone who cares about this show
and contributes to this show.
We really appreciate it.
All right, let's spin our wheel.
Please subscribe.
Arian doesn't know about the wheel.
Let's hope it's just dry and we don't it'll be dry it's
gonna be dry you won't have to worry about it yeah you don't have to worry arian okay cool
billy knows you might have to put your finger on a mousetrap but probably not or get wet
take a shower yeah uh see look you're fine see no problem we didn't have to you would have right
you would have no you're yeah you wouldn't'm lying. Aaron, you were down for anything. I was not going for my favorite. Love you, though.
Happy birthday.
All right.
Well, thank you, Arian.
Awesome to have you on.
Thank you, Billy.
Of course.
Tomorrow, I think Fights is here, so we'll have him do it as well.
Nice.
And everyone, please tune in to the Jerry After Dark tonight, the birthday stream.
No idea.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
I have no idea how long this will take us. It could take us.
We could be here tomorrow morning.
I'm rooting for you, man. Also, everybody go
follow Rihanna on all socials.
She's the most gorgeous woman on Earth.
Okay, nice. Nice.
She needed that plug.
What a plug. That's big.
She'd be like, where the fuck did all these followers go?
Wow.
Alright, see you everyone tomorrow. It's your straws, yeah Silenced tape for a while It's the act
It's the act
It's the act
Get signed and talk shop
Do a Yankees love
It's the act
It's the act hey have a good day everybody go watch sherry after dark go buy a yak gauntlet shirt and join
the discord it's gonna be cool even if you don't have discord it's easy to sign up go in there
it's like an extension of the chat. Think of it that way.
And I'll be in there sometimes, too, saying what up.
So get in there, please.
Bye.
Love you.