The Yak - We Pay Our Respects To One Of The Greatest Segments This Show Has Ever Seen || The Yak 4-18-22

Episode Date: April 19, 2022

Good Bye SlapsYou can find every episode of this show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify or YouTube. Prime Members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. For more, visit barstool.link/barstoolyak...

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Yak listeners, you can find every episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or YouTube. Prime members can listen ad-free on Amazon Music. Sass? Do it. Say the line. Start us off right. Let him just say something quick. Sass, do it. Zoom in on him.
Starting point is 00:00:35 Zoom in a little bit more. Joker, baby. No! Come on! Ew. Come on! I'm the Joker, baby. Just don't have it in me.
Starting point is 00:00:45 What's up, everyone? Hey. Good to see you all. This is awkward. Yeah. I'd like to apologize for talking too much and slapping too hard. I'd like to apologize for being a bitch. That's a crime.
Starting point is 00:00:58 Put me in jail. I'd like to apologize for being a bitch as well. For a hundred years. I have nothing to apologize for. I'd like to apologize for not being here. That was better that you weren't here. That was your big reveal. That was your big comeback, a sorry.
Starting point is 00:01:10 Yeah, you probably were going to wait for the camera to cut to it. Everybody else was apologizing. Why is mine so loud? Brandon's loud as fuck. You had the best case race. Brandon, good to see you. Good to see you. Did you watch some of the case race?
Starting point is 00:01:20 I did. I did. It was quite something. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was too much. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was too much. I had a blast.
Starting point is 00:01:28 I was enjoying watching it back, and then right around 11 beers, I was like, oh, you're a terrible person. I was pissing myself off. Yeah. Here's the thing. I mean, you guys got drunk. Yeah, no, I was still not like 100%. I'm wasted.
Starting point is 00:01:46 I was wasted. You were wasted. I fell asleep on the toilet. Taking a poop. Taking a poop. And then, yeah, I don't even remember like half of the second half of the show when I was the most annoying person in the world. Just saying I love you to everyone and then trying to murder them with slaps.
Starting point is 00:02:06 That's the worst part. That's the worst part. I can't be like, oh, that was an accident how hard I slapped you because I literally said before I slapped everyone, I'm going to murder this person. But I think it came off good, though. I think it's what people want. A little bit. Were you mad at Dana?
Starting point is 00:02:26 Me? Yeah, why'd you hit him so hard? Because it was fun. Yeah. It was fun to just hit as hard as possible. And it's with the face paint you can hit harder because you don't recognize that person you're looking at. No? Everyone kept on saying Dana looked like a fat Asian woman.
Starting point is 00:02:41 Yeah, he did. Why can't we see you guys? We can't. I don't like this. This is terrible. No, this is terrible. I can't see you guys. There we go. Who's they? Hank?
Starting point is 00:02:57 Corporate Hank. Well, technically, the tech guys per direction from Hank. What would you guys rank the entire case race? Any regrets? I've voiced mine. I regret who I am as a person, honestly. What?
Starting point is 00:03:11 It made me self-reflect to the point of, am I a fucking red blanket? Non-drunk boys looked bad. So we all are coming across... You and Saz looked awesome because you did the case race. You drank to your fullest extent, and you got wasted, which you can't rag on. Right. How did you guys not get drunk?
Starting point is 00:03:31 I can't drink beer. Okay. Just get quiet when I'm drunk. And, yeah, it's just I think the perspective from the viewer is different than, I don't know. It's a, I regret. I thought it was awesome in the moment. I was a little worried about, I just didn't want it to get too sloppy. Oh, it got too sloppy.
Starting point is 00:03:49 Which I know I shouldn't have worried about. If I was drunk, I wouldn't have given a fuck. Yeah, but it also wouldn't have worked if all eight people were you two. Yeah. I felt full. Maybe it would have. Sass is like, I have no regrets. I know.
Starting point is 00:04:07 That was like the most fun I've had in like a while. It was your birthday, so that's good. I had a really fun time. But if you do that outside of your birthday, you'd be a menace. I said we should run it back today. Pretty much. She just started drinking a lot today. Can we run down what happened afterwards?
Starting point is 00:04:22 Those are just what I'm like when I'm drunk. Yeah. You can't see me when I'm drunk. Those are just what I'm like when I'm drunk. Yeah. You can't see me when I'm drunk. That's just what I'm like. Yeah, I wonder if we'll ever put out the video of the post party. So, Sask, you wrangled troops to go to the bar. You went to the bar, which is the bar after. That means you didn't drink enough.
Starting point is 00:04:38 This is the next act is something I can't fathom. You want to talk about that? Yeah. So, Che went out. Who went out? At that point, it was just me and Che, and then other people that you guys don't know. Again, you didn't fucking work on it.
Starting point is 00:04:51 I was there. Che was there. After he's talking about it. You guys are face painted up. Talking about the other thing. Where did you guys go? We walked to a lot of places. It doesn't matter.
Starting point is 00:05:01 Che, who did you see? Yeah. Can we say that? In face paint? Yeah. So we used another face painter for this go-around, and she was great. We didn't use the first face painter because there was a lingering issue, I guess, where she would continually pop up where KB would be randomly.
Starting point is 00:05:24 Yeah, it was interesting for sure. In a big, big city. In a big, big city. She also doesn't live in. Right. She would appear places and be surprised. At my buddy's uncle's bar where we're the only people ever. It would have been impossible to trace Sassanai's location
Starting point is 00:05:40 that night. She was just there. She was with a bunch of friends. Yes. We went to like four different places and it was probably 3 to 3.30 in the morning and I got out of the bathroom and I went to the table where he was at and I saw a familiar face looking at me. While your face...
Starting point is 00:05:56 And Che... While I have a red panda on my face. Everyone else washed their face off. Che actively has his face... It took me like an hour to get mine on. I had to go to the next day. I had mine on. And so I got a recognizable smile and a wave and it was our original
Starting point is 00:06:09 face painter at this bar. That is the funniest thing in the world to me. The person who painted our faces sees us again months later and we still have this. She thinks we're addicted to faces. It's my first time, I swear. She literally saw us with our new girlfriend.
Starting point is 00:06:25 Yeah. She was like, oh, who was better? Someone else's face, yeah, way better. Yeah. It probably gave her false hope though.
Starting point is 00:06:31 She probably thinks you deleted her number like deleting a dealer's number when you're trying to quit. She thinks you're like a fetishist now. It's all about me.
Starting point is 00:06:38 I wasn't there. I love the precedent we've set for big episodes to face paint. It just feels like once you put the face paint on, you feel invincible. Jay also didn't tell me. He came up to me and was like, yo, I gotta
Starting point is 00:06:50 get out of here. And didn't say anything and then instantly texted me and he's like, dude, the fucking clown is here right now. So I didn't see her. I was leaving anyway and then on my way out I saw her and then I was like, holy shit, no way. So I immediately texted him. But that was a nice little moment we had.
Starting point is 00:07:06 You wouldn't have been able to get hard anyway. Yeah. Remember? No comment. So, wait, Ron, why? Maybe you would have been able to get hard. Oh, you definitely know. Even if you were grabbing tits or finger blasting,
Starting point is 00:07:19 you wouldn't have been able to get hard. Yes, say yes. There's a no-win situation. I would never be in that situation are you gay i just it was just like i could never get hard to a woman that's how faithful i am you do look tired still steven dude pumped out a mock draft at 2 15 a.m last night nobody else is crying what uh peace mode wait ron why are you upset at yourself you did nothing wrong 2.15 a.m. last night. Is it out? Nobody has this grind. Is it out? Good shit. What? Peace mode.
Starting point is 00:07:47 Wait, Rowan, why are you upset at yourself? You did nothing wrong. I don't know, dude. I got overwhelming feedback of people reaching out to me specifically being like, dude, you're a fucking loser. What? I used to like you, but you fucking suck now. Why? I got some of those, too.
Starting point is 00:08:02 Did you not get drunk enough? They called me a curmudgeon. People were mad. We probably all got some of those too. You're not getting drunk enough? They called me a curmudgeon. People were mad. I got the, like we probably all got the same DMs. I got thousands of DMs from people being like,
Starting point is 00:08:10 dude, you're not funny. Like the Joker thing wasn't funny, it was annoying. No, but Rome was being funny. No, I wasn't. I said beforehand, I called my shot
Starting point is 00:08:17 and I was like, dude, I'm about to be really unfunny once I get drunk and I got drunk. Oh, so you're not, I mean, I guess that's a, would you rather be the unfunny guy? Would you rather be Dana?
Starting point is 00:08:27 Dana won because he just didn't talk. Or would you rather be the guy like me who just tells everyone that he loves him? And then you next. That makes sense. And says really mean thing makes for a better show. A friend, but a better show. Repeating myself. I just kept on repeating myself.
Starting point is 00:08:42 No, but that monologue you had. And then the sass is Joker thing. It was like one of those things where beginning funny middle repeating myself. No, but that monologue you had, and then the Sass is Joker thing, it was like one of those things where beginning funny, middle, everybody's annoyed, but that's funny. And then at the end, that last one was funny again. It made my head spin how funny that was. I liked when I, I don't even remember, but I liked when I was like for like 10 minutes,
Starting point is 00:09:00 I'm trying to get TJ to zoom in on me. I have something really important to say. After Dan's monologue. All right, Sass may be reflecting on his 21 years. TJ, any statement you'd like to provide on your cheating allegations? What?
Starting point is 00:09:16 I think people need to not care so much. You guys can have the win if you want it. I don't care. A lot of people said that you drank during the timeout. It looks like that's true, but what would we have done? That's a cheating allegation. There's another allegation.
Starting point is 00:09:32 I was just pouring my beers into the trash. I was cheating. There's another one? Yes. There's a KB shit pants allegation. What? Oh, no. When he lifted his legs to fart, a little solid came out and got sucked back in like a moray eel. Let me it in do we have the no let no let me put an end to that real fast. Yeah, I did
Starting point is 00:09:51 Yeah, you got me They found like a wet spot later. It was a busy, but you could see the turd come out and be sucked back in There's literally a saw did say you say shit was forced farting. I had to shit myself I did yeah, I did you could see in the pants like a little, yeah. Fucking gross. A whack-a-mole. And I got this big ass fucking bump on my lip that keeps growing. You keep on playing with it.
Starting point is 00:10:11 You keep on playing with it. I did notice that. You're grabbing the wrong side. So I think we should. I think we should. What the fuck is that, bro? Is that a cyst? It's a fucking cyst.
Starting point is 00:10:19 Can we pull up KB's turd? It's not herpes. Can I lance that? I've had it. Yeah, you see that solid? In the clip, you can see it suck back in. Oh, no. I don't know about suck back in.
Starting point is 00:10:31 Where'd it go? I did shit, though. I think we should do this again next year for Sass. I wasn't even drunk. Everyone could get a redemption. I won't talk. Can't you be here? My stomach rejects me.
Starting point is 00:10:40 Let's do hard liquor. Hard liquor. Let's do wasted. That's a little more dangerous. Fifth and a friend. Not for me. Because we did like a bottle of tequila the one day, and that was like a nice drunk.
Starting point is 00:10:53 I felt like I was like drunk, and it felt really good. Like KB was really drunk the one time. Like he wasn't hateable when he was drunk that time. I think I liable to that. Nick was really drunk that one time. I made you guys hard eggnog on Sirius one day. Yeah, like we got drunk.
Starting point is 00:11:07 I don't think our liability would be off the charts. I don't care. The fact that it was a case race is why we got so many views. People like beer. Yeah. People like birthdays, too. I'm going to try. We shouldn't just talk about the negative things.
Starting point is 00:11:22 I mean, it went really well. Yeah, we crushed. Me and you crushed Sass and I had fun no everyone everyone did well it got a ton of views it did
Starting point is 00:11:29 there it is we're talking about like the 20 comments that we got that people didn't like yeah you're right you're right holy shit
Starting point is 00:11:36 I'm the last person to do something like that well no but I'm just saying like it was a huge it was a huge success it was a huge success literally 10x our last episode
Starting point is 00:11:44 yeah I did have a great thousand views yeah and I look back and i was like that was fun yeah no i felt like shit for three days uh i do think we should do the next one when's tommy's birthday brandon i want to catch up with you brandon when is his birthday july 13th i think we should do a six pack of coke challenge everyone has to drink one six pack. Coca-Cola. I think that would be hard. That would be so funny. What about an eight ball of Coke?
Starting point is 00:12:09 Yeah. Yeah, you could do one or the other. Six or an eight. I turn into Dana. When you do Coke? When you drink Coke? You just get quiet? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Really? You just get a ton of blowjobs? We should do. You are going on Barstool vs. America. Yeah, like six stops, six major cities, a lot of downtime, a lot of party time,
Starting point is 00:12:31 a lot of meet and greets. I guarantee you I won't fuck. You're in it for the blowjobs. That's where Dana got his crown. And that's what I mean. That's why KB is on board for that because he's trying to get sucked like Dana. Is Dana here right now, Steven?
Starting point is 00:12:47 He tweeted this morning he was flying somewhere. Oh, he might have already flown. I like how everybody's a different shadow. Look at that. Alex Bennett Photoshop here bothers me. Yeah, we weren't all there for that photo. No. It looks like you guys are hosting it from that.
Starting point is 00:13:04 It sure does, yeah. There's only eight of you? Yeah. Four teams. Really? Yeah, it's a duo this year. Are you guys on a team together or are you guys separated? Yeah, it's me and Joey Camasta.
Starting point is 00:13:17 What are you competing for? They haven't told us. Unlimited high noons. House? I won't go to that. Really? No. That's what it was last year, right? A Jersey Shore house. Yeah, house. And like the whole company stopped working for like a month.
Starting point is 00:13:34 Yeah. Everyone was going to Jersey Shore. Months. No one's come back. People just haven't come back. They're all down there. Let them live. There was somebody in the office. Roan found somebody. Roan, you bring it up. I've got a whom's done it.
Starting point is 00:13:50 It's not that crazy of a whom's done it. But I went to go take a dump today after we recorded Son of a Boy Dad. And I sat next to someone who was just like blaring music the entire time in their stall. Which isn't like that crazy of a move. But if I'm even watching a video and someone else walks into the bathroom, I'll completely turn off my volume because I don't want them to hear what I'm watching. I don't want to affect their poop experience.
Starting point is 00:14:11 That's how a human being should behave. This person was blasting. It was Jack Harlow, but like an old Jack Harlow song, and they were just sitting there. I was like farting my ass off. They were waiting for you to come in? Wanted to impress you? Wanted you to freeze all over?
Starting point is 00:14:25 Couldn't have been me. They couldn't have known it was me. Maybe they thought they were connected to headphones. No. It wasn't going that long. You probably had the phones while shitting in the bathroom is a bold move as well. That's crazy too. That's like being a deaf person who farts all over the place.
Starting point is 00:14:40 You don't know what kind of sounds your body's making. Right. But does anybody recognize these shoes? Let me see, let me see, let me see. And it's TJ. Put it on the...
Starting point is 00:14:50 Let's get to the bottom of this. That's... Looks like it could be... Yeah, I want to know who did this. Who? Coach Duggs? No.
Starting point is 00:14:55 Was it Jack Harlow? Wait, does a deaf person know they're farting? Yeah. Uh, let's get... You could feel the fart. Let's get some people shooting there.
Starting point is 00:15:04 Do they know it's offensive? We need to figure out who the Harlow shitter is So here's what we gotta do We gotta have people come in Do you think it's hello in their culture? We gotta get people to come in And we have to have a camera on their shoes When they come in
Starting point is 00:15:17 They know, the Koda kids had prom And it was a pair of Reeboks It was Reebok classics. Should be easy to find. Steven, you want to go? I play music when I'm shitting, but not in a conjoined, but not in a big bathroom. Conjoined.
Starting point is 00:15:34 Boy, you are 21. You would have said Siamese. Yeah, bring like five people in. I always blast music when I'm shitting because I don't want people to hear my farts. I don't think that's what was happening, though. Maybe. Farts explode through the toilet.
Starting point is 00:15:49 Who would it be that would be okay? Jerry would be okay. Jerry would be fine. I would have been fine with Travies, Glennie. Glennie says that he watches shit. I saw big heavy. I did a lap. There wasn't anyone on the content side.
Starting point is 00:16:04 Who would not be okay? That's not fat feet either. Well, who's coming over to this side to shit? That's the worst bathroom eat in the pool. Oh, no. Definitely not Reebok classics. You know what? No, Steven.
Starting point is 00:16:14 Steven. Steven. Steven. Steven. Windows are tinted. They can't hear you. Steven. Let's do.
Starting point is 00:16:20 Come here. Well, let's detail the extent of the crime because I think it should be illegal. Let's do spy cam. Spy cam's better. Oh, spy cam on shoes. Spy cam's better. You want me to do it? Yeah, you can do it.
Starting point is 00:16:32 All right, cool, cool, cool. All right, so those are the shoes. Those are the shoes. Those are the shoes. Can you find those shoes? They're tiny feet. Brandon, how can I know? It's resized.
Starting point is 00:16:38 I'll do it. I'll do it. I think those are small feet. Okay, so it's the size of maybe almost a tile. Send me the Zoom. I'll do it. Those are, that might be sized. I don't know. They look like miniature feet. Okay, so it's the size of maybe almost a tile. Send me the Zoom. I'll do it. Those are... That might be sized like miniature feet.
Starting point is 00:16:48 Yeah, they're dainty little feet. Dainty. Ben, how are you doing? I don't know, man. That sounds bad. Going through it. How? You can't be going through it after you come back from Mississippi.
Starting point is 00:17:00 No, it... Okay, everything... You can't make fun of his lost dog. He found it. Did you buy anything? Everything went wrong. I bought these before the trip. Everything went wrong
Starting point is 00:17:09 on the trip. I don't know if I'm moving to Mississippi now. Oh, no. Really? Nothing went right. You made such a hubbub. Nothing...
Starting point is 00:17:15 First of all, I got there Monday. The dog got loose. I searched through him through the night. I found him at 7 a.m. in a Dollar Tree parking lot. You know that...
Starting point is 00:17:24 Just a pro tip, a leash? Yeah, you tree parking lot you know that just a pro tip a leash yeah you could get a leash no this isn't this wasn't a leash situation he was at my mom's house he was fine it sounds like a leash could have fixed he was fine and then he he ran off and he ran for miles and miles anyway it doesn't matter i found him i just don't know if i'm gonna move to miss i might wait another year this is wild because because you've been in New York for so long, your identity has changed a little bit, and now you've lost touch with Mississippi. Nothing.
Starting point is 00:17:50 You have no home. Nothing. I don't have a home. Correct. This is like the terminal. What else went wrong? Well, I had non-COVID COVID last week, two weeks ago. What does that mean?
Starting point is 00:18:02 It means I had what felt like COVID but didn't test as COVID. Flu? Probably the flu. It's good. And right now Tommy's down with it. The whole family got it over the last week. So we didn't go anywhere in Mississippi. I was the only one that could leave the hotel room.
Starting point is 00:18:16 So Tommy's down real bad. And I just, nothing. I couldn't find a house. I couldn't. You were begging people for barbecue on Twitter. I dinged up my car. That was the best part. I did get the barbecue. That was delicious.
Starting point is 00:18:28 I met Mike Leach. I interviewed Mike Leach. That was good. I dinged up my car. What? I caught a rock in the windshield. And then I went around and I looked at the rock in the windshield and I got mad at the rock in the windshield and when I was coming back I punched the door and then I dinged the door. You dinged your own car?
Starting point is 00:18:44 I did. That's a rare ding. You punched your own car? Yeah, what? I'm a strong man. Or a shitty car. Yeah. Great car. It was a Kia.
Starting point is 00:18:52 Was it the new car? Not the new car. I didn't take that all the way down there. But Brandon, is there a chance that you're too, in your newfound
Starting point is 00:19:00 Yankee money phase of life that you've become too bougie for the homes that were available to you? What was wrong with them? No, if... Housing market in Starkville has exploded and now the advantage I had of getting a cheaper house down there than what I
Starting point is 00:19:19 get up here is not really there anymore. So Jersey is cheaper than Starkville now? They're very close. Starkville with no S. You take credit for the blow up? I don't take credit for the blow up. I just couldn't find a good house. Why don't you just get one made? Yeah. That would take a year. Drive one down for a year. Well, you just said you want
Starting point is 00:19:35 to be here for a year? I might do it now. Let us build your floor plan. Y'all gonna build my house? Yeah. That would be awesome. Yeah, that would actually be a great yak. You could probably get like... Trunk off a case race. Yes, yes. It'll be like $30,000 to get the blueprints made, and we could probably get that free if we just did it live on the air.
Starting point is 00:19:52 Think about the advertising for whoever's making these blueprints. Get us a builder. Get us a blueprint guy. Yeah, and just figure out all the specs that you want. What kind of stuff are you looking for? What amenities? That's up to you guys. That's nice.
Starting point is 00:20:02 We're going to build it. Tim Riggins and his brother did it in the finale of Friday Night Lights. They were building a house by hand. Spoiler. Watch out, yeah. I've never seen it. But like a pool or like an in-ground trampoline? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:16 I kind of like that. Slam ball court. Indoor. Indoor slam ball. Indoor outdoor pool. So I don't know where I'm at. I don't know what I'm going to do. I've got two months to make a decision.
Starting point is 00:20:27 That's scary. Medieval times kind of set up for Tommy. Yeah. We're just doing this, aren't we? Oh, I mean, we're. Yeah, we're doing this. Tommy gets the master bedroom. I've had a dream for a while.
Starting point is 00:20:41 If I had money, I'd build one of the rooms in my house with all the furniture nailed to the ceiling so it feels like you're upside down. That'd be pretty cool. That's a sick dream. About five minutes? Yeah. All right. Do you have any other dreams you've always had?
Starting point is 00:20:55 As well as something you've always thought about? Dan has an upside down room. It's not all it's cracked up to be. It's so over it. We're talking about that guy who has a Jumbotron in his living room. Do you see that go viral? That would be cool for like a day, and then you'd just be like, fuck. I think that'd forever be cool.
Starting point is 00:21:12 There's a Jumbotron in my living room. What is a Jumbotron as opposed to just like a regular TV? A regular Tron. Baby Tron? A four-sided Tron. Oh, really? Yeah. If you find the clip.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Is it the one in the garden? Is it a real-sized one? Yeah, it's a whole house It's probably not jumbo It's just a regular Tron I can No one can No one can figure out Trons
Starting point is 00:21:31 They're always either They're mega They're jumbo Or they're baby Yeah What about just a Tron Legacy? Yeah
Starting point is 00:21:38 It's an old movie It's an old flick I'm sorry for shitting on your idea I'm trying to help you make that room Oh See? That looks like a fucking microwave What's this? I'm sorry for shitting on your idea, Owen. I'm trying to help you make that room. Oh. See? That looks like a fucking microwave. Oh, bro.
Starting point is 00:21:50 You can't do that. Yeah, that's not a jumbotron. It's all the same game. It's a microtron. That's not it, is it? Yeah. I don't think it's a microtron. That's not it.
Starting point is 00:21:59 It's a different one. Someone else. The ceilings were lower, and it looked worse. Play a musical chair. This guy has the MSG. Barstool Sports Instagram posted it in the last week. So you're going to have to scroll back for a long time. For all the backflip videos.
Starting point is 00:22:15 Have they been posting a lot of backflips? Me, I'm not going out tonight. Me, 12 beers later, backflip. Epic. Week 4 went off. And then all the comments were like okay now this is
Starting point is 00:22:27 Barstool. Finally some real content. Here it is. This is Ziztron. Like it's much smaller. That one's uglier.
Starting point is 00:22:39 And it's like I would just I always got a TV I got a TV right over there. Yeah we just got two TVs. And they're much bigger. It's not at a viable viewing angle. Right. You got a TV right over there. Yeah, we just got two TVs. Oh, and they're much bigger.
Starting point is 00:22:45 It's not at a viable viewing angle. Right. It would just be an annoying light. Yeah, he didn't give us any perspective of where this is. I'll be honest. I think it's cool. It looks cool. I don't think it's practical.
Starting point is 00:22:57 No, I don't think he actually watches anything on it. It's probably more just for style. It's like we're being haters. You guys look straight at your living room TV or up? on it. It's probably more just for style. We're being haters. Michael Scott got all wanted. You guys look straight at your living room TV or up? I hate looking up. I think whenever you have to look down on people.
Starting point is 00:23:14 I'd rather hit. I exclusively look down on people. So you can tell new money from old money. New money puts TVs above their fireplaces. Yeah, I hate that. There's a whole Reddit of TV too high. Old money. They just watch the Yeah, I hate that. There's a whole Reddit of TV too high. Hold money. Watch the fire. I hate it. Brandon, when we design your house,
Starting point is 00:23:31 we're not putting the TV over your fireplace. Oh, no. Are we going to have a fireplace? Yes. Multiple, of course. One in the bedroom. Hot tub. However many Brianna chicken fry has,
Starting point is 00:23:42 multiply that by two. Double that shit. Should I go find this shitter? What'd he do again? It's the Harlow shit He was playing music so loud And just like Scrolling through videos And they just sat there for
Starting point is 00:23:54 Like cause I had an extensive poop I got in Did you make your presence known? I was farting so loud I was farting so loud Intentionally By design Just to kind of give him a warning shot Be like hey Someone else in here I was farting so loud. Intentionally, by design.
Starting point is 00:24:08 Just to kind of give him a warning shot, be like, hey, someone else in here. Do you have a recognizable fart? Oh, yeah, it's my signature. It's his watermark on his songs. I just never understood playing music out loud in a public place. Yeah, it's crazy. It's not a personal prerogative. No one prefers that over headphones. They want themselves to come off a certain way
Starting point is 00:24:26 to other people. I did once. It was TiVo? So wait, who's the worst it could be? Who's the worst it could be? I think a shy guy doing it would be the worst
Starting point is 00:24:33 because maybe he was doing it to cover up his farts. He's just shy about pooping? He was like, okay, what's popular? Jack Harlow. He just looked up rap. Yeah, he Googled rap.
Starting point is 00:24:42 Anyone want to do guesses? I think it's going to be Riley Collins. I think it's going to be Riley Collins. I think it was Jack Harlow. It might have been Jack Harlow. That would have been a good twist. It would be bad if it's one of my guys. Yeah, he was just in there singing.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Who the fuck is farting in the stall over? It's Jack Harlow on KFC Radio today. That was my favorite video from the Barstool Instagram this past week of Ed Sheeran singing that song in the pool hall. I didn't see it. You saw it? No. An absolute classic.
Starting point is 00:25:12 You guys don't actually go to the IG, do you? The problem with the Riley guest is he sits on the third floor, so why would he come down to a more... Very obvious. He has a crush on somebody upstairs. No, you poop from the furthest bathroom from your desk. From your crush. You poop as far away from your crush.
Starting point is 00:25:28 What? I don't poop here. You go upstairs to poop? I used to poop on two. Now I work on two. Now I poop down here. Poop on three. Who's too busy to poop?
Starting point is 00:25:37 I mean, that one's gross, too. The cat's on spy cam. I can't hear him. I can't hear him. We can't hear you yet. Be like... Cat, we don't hear you. We don't hear you. We can't hear you yet. Be like. We don't hear you.
Starting point is 00:25:46 We don't hear you. Just. Nick, there might be a joke down below. See, it's a Reebok shoe, but they also sell a shoe that's called The Question. Brandon, what's your favorite song? How about now? Yes, yes, yes. Got you now.
Starting point is 00:25:59 Reebok has a shoe called The Question? Yes. I'll answer that later. Yeah, let's run that back. What's up, Ebony? And TJ just cut that. See his ass. Whoa. Yes, yeah, let's run that back TJ just cut that Whoa You wear stun shoes she's afraid to like it personally experiment with something
Starting point is 00:26:25 Rude boy, I'm gonna go get I'm gonna get my headphones on with something outside the box. No, no, no. Those are nice. Those are fire. A rude boy. I'm going to go get my headphones. Yeah, got to get the headphones. Oh, he's flying. Whoa. What the fuck? That's fast.
Starting point is 00:26:36 Is that the flash? Oh, there are two. Yeah, yeah. Oh, no, his notes. Oh, no, that's Rico's notes. Oh, not a great angle. That's a fine angle. Wired headphones?
Starting point is 00:26:50 It's not Doug's. I see that's how you maintain your wealth. Doug's chose violence today with those shoes. Black Air Forces. Orthopedic. Yeah. Do you know the guy who roasts shoes in the singing voice yet? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:06 Yes, yes, yes. You know him? Love him. Yeah, I found him. The 1-800-DEEZ-NUTS.com guy. He's so funny. I've been watching a lot of Jaleel. I can see him getting stanned, too. Jaleel, yeah?
Starting point is 00:27:16 Jaleel's the best. He's the best. Oh, yeah. Yes, yes, we hear you. Yes, we can hear you. What's up Gus I already checked out Robbie He's good Hey good
Starting point is 00:27:34 Hey Robbie Timeless shoe Close Ultra boost Ultra boost Comfy Can't be glinny What are you rocking today bro
Starting point is 00:27:42 Shoes He's got Nikes on Colorful Nike's. Confirmed colorful Nike's. Dude, what are those burner shoes? Yeah. They're shit. What are you rocking, Fran?
Starting point is 00:27:54 Oh, no. It's Fran. It's Fran. It's Fran. Oh, no. No way. Those aren't the shoes. Those are not them.
Starting point is 00:28:02 Of course, covering the ankles. What do we think? I think it's got to be someone who is not traditionally the head of the cave. This is a Gen Z move. Oh, fuck. Oh, no. We're frozen. We're frozen up.
Starting point is 00:28:21 Rudy, what are you rocking? Peter. Ain't Rudy. Rudy's not caught dead in this. Yeah, he's rocking like suede coon skin. Can you hear me? I just dropped my... Can you hear me?
Starting point is 00:28:34 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Chuck, Chuck's a no. Chuck's got some good bones. I would have guessed that was a Chuck move. I would have been fine with it if it was Chuck, honestly. Nope. Ask him a couple more questions. Maybe ask him a question.
Starting point is 00:28:48 Yeah, ask him a question. What if the person's still in there? He's still in there? Oh! Who's that? That's Tommy. Tommy, Tommy. Yeah, Tommy's got the weird shirt.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Tommy lives in the bathroom. Yes, he's always in the bathroom. Always. Always in the bathroom. You guys, whenever I go in that bathroom, he's in there. He's never using it. He's loitering. He's waiting to make a punchline. He uses it a lot, too, though. It's contextually relevant. But he's so nervous, he just in there. He's never using it. He's loitering. He's waiting to make a punchline. He uses it a lot too
Starting point is 00:29:06 though. It's contextually relevant. He's so nervous. He just poops. He's always doing punchlines and sketches. Just for him. He has an act. Personal test. There's nobody on the content side at all. Let's go over to the editing side.
Starting point is 00:29:20 Go to the editing side. I think it's the third floor. I think it's the editing side. How did they cross bathrooms? The side one. That side of the office gets here early. They got their coffee in and they had to shit and they wanted to go away from their desk.
Starting point is 00:29:37 A common crush. What if it was a girl? Yeah. I'd be out at them as Trish. Oh my god. Yeah, I'd be out at them as Trish. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. That would be brutal. Yeah, I was going to wait.
Starting point is 00:29:49 Here's a small foot. It was their first time using the men's bathroom. Definitely beat me. We finally got the courage. Which shoes are you rocking today? They're melting. Oh, no. Please, no.
Starting point is 00:30:02 Mikey Trailburners. Okay. Kelsey. Oh whoa whoa No This is gonna be bad now guys You realize that Yeah I'm invested
Starting point is 00:30:14 We're gonna find them Harlow Shitter John Kelly no There's a great chance That the person is now aware That we're looking for them. Yeah, they're probably on the land. Come clean.
Starting point is 00:30:30 It'll be way better for you if you just come clean. If Blattman's trying to be like, no, I just didn't wear shoes to work today. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What are those? No, I didn't wear shoes. Wait a minute. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:30:38 Wait a minute. Yep. Those are them. Those are them. Those are them? Oh, no. Is it Deathluster? Let me see the last song you were listening to on your Spotify.
Starting point is 00:30:47 Oh. What have you been listening to on Spotify? Oh, poor guy. Oh, I feel really bad. Don't feel bad. Recently played. Why? He listened to music.
Starting point is 00:30:57 Podcast. No, recently played your library. Does it have a history? A search. Literally just podcasts It was a podcast Straight shooter Wait a minute Wait a minute
Starting point is 00:31:10 That's a shoe That's not the same pants though It's not the pants Go over the pants Go over the pants He's wearing jeans That's not the pants You've been acquitted
Starting point is 00:31:18 We gotta be looking more for the pants Those are black pants right? We're sure those aren't jeans It could be dark. It could be a shadowed jean. Wait a minute. This fucking bump on my lip is really hindering me. Wait, those are the pants without the shoes.
Starting point is 00:31:32 Oh, they swapped? They swapped. Switcheroo? One guy was in there shitting and the other guy was in there farting. This is where I think it is. It's one of these fellows. Me too. No.
Starting point is 00:31:46 Beeman's such a fucking hipster Being like Look at me I'm Bill Russell Alright Beeman Nothing over here Wait a minute Brendan No that wasn't Brendan
Starting point is 00:31:53 Oh Not This is bad We don't have it Is it upstairs? Tech room shit? Alright Someone give us a
Starting point is 00:32:03 Hip Oh that's Someone in this office Knows Wait a minute Tech room shit? Someone give us a hip. Someone in this office knows. Wait a minute. Whoa, whoa, whoa. That's not it. That's a lot of sock though. Wait a minute. That's it.
Starting point is 00:32:19 Open up Spotify. What was the last music you were listening to? Spotify. Who is this last music you were listening to? Spotify. Who is this? I don't know. That's Trent. What was your search? The Weeknd.
Starting point is 00:32:37 You may not have searched it. Go to his library. Was it Macklemore? Who are they listening to? Harlow. Harlow. Jack Harlow. Harlow, Jack Harlow. You been listening to Jack Harlow? Oh, boy. Oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:32:53 We got it, boys. We got it. Why didn't he go? Why did he travel? And so he just passed a bathroom. Passed a bathroom? I don't know. I don't know who the fuck that is. Trent. Trent.
Starting point is 00:33:10 Worst case scenario. We're just going to let him get away with it? How do I get him in? I don't know. What do we do? Now go get him, Steve. You want me to grab him? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:33:21 All right, all right. We've got to figure out how we're going to see him. You have to show him the picture and speak. Does this look familiar? What a plot twist to have the dude who has the same shoes but not the right one. I know. I like that. But.
Starting point is 00:33:30 He's very nervous. Yeah, he's like, holy podcast. Who's Trent? He works on the. He works on the Dion. He said he dabbles in Harlow. Dion? Dion Doc.
Starting point is 00:33:41 One of Dion's guys? All right, bring him in here. Why'd he pass a bathroom to shit? I don't know about that. I feel like, I think you should bring in both of's guys? I bring him in here. Why do you pass a bathroom to shit? I don't know about you. I feel like, I think you should bring in both of the guys with the shoes on. Oh, yeah. I have questions for the guy who doesn't jam or groove. He just listens to podcasts?
Starting point is 00:33:54 He just listens to podcasts. You never jam or groove. TJ, who were those people? Doesn't bop or bib? Doesn't bop. I don't know. That other one is named Francis. Francis and Trent.
Starting point is 00:34:02 Go get Francis and Trent. Yeah. By the way, we got to spin the wheel. Wait. We do. We got to reset, though, no? Wait, are we? No.
Starting point is 00:34:11 Oh, it's jeans. Did we get a reset? Yeah, we got it right at the end of the episode. Oh, thank God. Oh, did we? I had no idea. Yo, remember? Reset?
Starting point is 00:34:22 You guys don't even remember? Sass's list. I actually have a list because of this big fucking cyst on my lap. You keep on fiddling with it. Yes, I'm fucking fiddling with it. Are you going to keep it? It feels like a marble when it falls off. Should we take slap wheel off?
Starting point is 00:34:37 No. Should I just let everyone slap me? No, no, no. That's unjust. That's unjust. That's not just. This is how fucked up I was. I saw Ronan in our neighborhood yesterday, and I was with my son, and my son kind of
Starting point is 00:34:48 ran up near him, and Roan flinched. Roan was like, they're just going to beat, the whole family's going to beat me up. He beelined for me. I thought that I was fucking cooked. This is him. This is him, undeniable. Yo, what's up, Trent? Yo.
Starting point is 00:35:00 Trent. If you stand right there, we're going to wait for one more man. Yeah, we're just going to wait for Francis as well There we go We just wanted to talk to you guys because you guys both have the same type of shoes Can you guys step in a little more Look at those
Starting point is 00:35:15 These are corduroy They're dark I don't think you can tell Can we see the picture again real quick There's a third pair I've been told I'm just going to know why we have you in here. There's a third pair. I've been told, yeah. Yeah, let's see the picture again, T. No, I'm just going to say
Starting point is 00:35:26 that this is me. Oh! Yes, yes. There's a little story here. So, I was fighting for my life in that bathroom. Yep, there it is.
Starting point is 00:35:37 What do you mean? Like, I was, I had something bad last night and I was fighting for my life in there. I heard you come in and I'm like... How could you tell it was me?
Starting point is 00:35:43 My farts, right? My signature farts? No, from just listening. That's the worst person you come in, and I'm like... How could you tell it was me? My farts, right? My signature farts? No, from just listening. That's the worst person to come in when you're fighting on the toilet. Yeah. So basically, I heard the door open, and that was pretty much the end of my fighting for my life. So, I mean, I was just sitting there, you know, just jamming out, kind of admiring what I just did on that toilet. It didn't smell.
Starting point is 00:36:05 It didn't smell? It didn't smell? It didn't smell. And then I kind of heard you letting out a couple rips, and I'm like. Oh, Roan. I told you it was my signature farts. You're with an ally. Yeah, that's what I thought. It was like cool or something.
Starting point is 00:36:16 When I'm in a bathroom, I don't like the silence. I don't like shitting with somebody. Really? I would rather just blast it and not hear anything you never use headphones i had headphones in oh it weren't working weren't connected i had my airpods and i know that for sure i told you they weren't they weren't connected i mean they were definitely connected they weren't dude i had a little harlow blasted in my ear so it wasn't it wasn't just in your ear because it was it was enough loud like, oh, I could tell exactly what they're listening to.
Starting point is 00:36:47 Why Harlow? Does that make it easier? Is that the paupers? It was just on shuffle. I didn't specifically pick Harlow to finish my shit. But, you know, it's not a bad thing to finish it to, I guess. Not at all, dude. And I hate to put you on the spot, but it was just I didn't know I was even putting you on the spot.
Starting point is 00:37:03 It wasn't embarrassing. Not at all. It could have been way worse. But I was just like, what a I was even putting you on the spot. It wasn't embarrassing. Not at all. It could have been way worse, but I was just like, what a move, because I'm the exact opposite. If someone else comes in, I turn down my music or I turn down the videos. I don't even want them to know what Instagram I'm scrolling through or what TikToks I'm watching. Really?
Starting point is 00:37:17 Okay. I feel like it's anything to kill the white noise is what works for me. We should have music that just plays in the bathroom. I think so. Like a hotel. More bathrooms should. Yes. It's like a music
Starting point is 00:37:29 that's like blast, music with farts kind of interlaced. That's more the point of the fan. Like when sirens are gunning the airflow. What'd you eat last night? I had some Popeyes for dinner
Starting point is 00:37:39 and I probably did it. You probably did it. Now, why did you choose this bathroom? So... Were you in the kitchen and then it hit you? Or are you trying to get away from your crush? No, so I work like in that..., why did you choose this bathroom? So... Were you in the kitchen and then it hit you? Or were you trying to get away from your crush?
Starting point is 00:37:47 No, so I work like in that... Oh, Francis, you're dismissed. Oh, yeah, Francis. You're absolved. I should have told you to leave. Yeah, yeah. There's got to be a second pair of these. Yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:55 Sorry, dude. Both nice kicks to both of you. No, so I work in the corner over there, the production corner. Right. And I went to that bathroom and I heard somebody in there also fighting for their life so i'm like i don't want to do this next to them okay so i walked down the hall realized there's nobody in there and then i took my took my throne got it okay yes what got away with it too so suspect wasn't confirmed no longer suspect no longer i feel like if you're blasting phone or music on your phone without headphones, that's a different story.
Starting point is 00:38:26 But I guess mine was just too loud. It was territorial almost. I feel like you would know if it was muffled by AirPods in the ear. I think it wasn't connected to the AirPods, but you thought it was. You would know that as well, so someone's lying. One of the two is lying. I think you should be allowed to play music. You just, when someone comes in, you have to restart the song.
Starting point is 00:38:48 So they just tell them, or like, what do you want to listen to? Yeah, like, I'll wait a minute. You said you were blasting Jack Harlow in your AirPods. Among any other songs. Before that, you said you heard Roan walk in. Oh! Which one is it? No, listen.
Starting point is 00:39:02 You heard his 80 steps. I was playing the music, right, no. Which one is it? No, listen. You heard it. Oh, no. It was 80 steps. I was playing the music, right, already. Were you ever playing disconnected? What do you mean? From my AirPods? No AirPods. No, I was not. Okay.
Starting point is 00:39:14 No. So just going about my business here, not at full volume. I hear him come in. That's when I turn him up because I don't want to hear what he's doing in there. Okay. You still did. Which also lends credence to the fact that it might have been unplugged. Because if it was a full
Starting point is 00:39:29 volume on a noise-canceling headphone, I don't care how loud I'm not on it. What do you have? These are from like 2014. They're the OG ones. They're not that great. Why are we giving this guy... Why are we doubting him in any way? Roan historically exclusively lies. Roan has been nothing
Starting point is 00:39:45 but honest to me. For some reason, whenever they initially came out, I don't know, what was that? It's about the same AirPods for eight years. He did something else.
Starting point is 00:39:50 Yeah, something like that. That's just bad luck, Trent, because if we were drunk right now, I'd give you my AirPods. Yeah, you would. No problem. Just hand them right to him. $400.
Starting point is 00:39:57 Here you go, buddy. Something like that. And I also feel bad that I don't want this to be your calling card. Oh, no, it is. Roan, you took the picture. Your poop music calling card. Oh, no, it is. You took the picture. You're Poop Music Trent.
Starting point is 00:40:08 Yeah, yeah. I know. We already have another Trent, so you're Poop Trent. That's the worst possible name I could have gotten. No, you're not Poop Trent. It really was just because I took the picture because I was going to go about it on my own. And Nick was like, oh, we got to save this fish. Because I even went around the content side and I was trying to get to the bottom of it.
Starting point is 00:40:29 So the picture's worth $1,200. Poop Trent, what are you working on right now? So right now I'm about to work on group chat for the day, our Snapchat show. He's on this next episode, right? He is, yeah. I'm going to be going on Barstool vs. America on the road. Some production stuff.
Starting point is 00:40:43 So that's where I'll be the next couple weeks. A lot of pooping on the road. A lot of pooping on the bus, yeah. Don't poop on the bus. Don't poop on the bus. You can't pee on the road. Okay. Production stuff. So that's where I'll be the next couple weeks. A lot of pooping on the bus. Yeah. Don't poop on the bus. Don't poop on the bus. You can't pee on the bus. No, you can. If I'm Poop Trent.
Starting point is 00:40:51 Poop Trent. On the bus. Poop Trent. I like how he's Poop Trent and I just got away scot-free from literally shitting my pants. As soon as we hire another KB,
Starting point is 00:41:01 that'll be the distinguisher. It'll be Poop KB. All right. Well, thank you, Poop Trent. Absolutely. Sorry about that. Thank you. we hire another KB, that'll be the distinguisher. All right, well, thank you, Poop Trent. Yeah, absolutely. Sorry about that. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:41:09 That's a really good nickname. That's a good guy. Poop Trent. That's fucked up. I feel bad now. Nah, he's Poop Trent.
Starting point is 00:41:14 No, no, he doesn't. I'm all skinny love. That was funny. Oh, Jake's back from Poland. Jake,
Starting point is 00:41:20 let's go. We're in Poland. We're in Poland? He just wanted to be around more white people? Yes, yeah. Why were just in war-torn Poland. Just wanted to be around more white people. Yes, yeah. Why were you in Poland? He was born.
Starting point is 00:41:30 Why were you in Poland? I thought he was in San Diego. No, I just got back. I was over there playing for the Czech lacrosse team. He's on the Czech national lacrosse team. In Poland? Yeah, so we had European qualifiers over there. For the?
Starting point is 00:41:41 For the World Lacrosse Championships next summer. I thought it was the Olympics. You're playing for the Czech? Yeah. My dad's from there, so I have a passport. Did you play in college? I practiced with UVA. I didn't really play.
Starting point is 00:41:51 That's enough for you. You just know what a Czech national team is. You would be surprised at the level of lacrosse for Europe. Welcome back. Thank you. Welcome back. Wait, that's six, so are you going to be an Olympian? If I can stay in decent shape until 2028, there's a decent chance.
Starting point is 00:42:05 You will be in the Olympian. What a loophole. Yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. I'll get the rings tattooed and everything. I'll be. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:42:12 Get them tattooed now. That's a little, you know. Why? It's like getting the chosen one tattooed. Call it a shot. How was the camaraderie? Yeah, I know. Were you shacked up in barracks with those?
Starting point is 00:42:22 Last time I was in Prague, it was, yeah. But this one was like a hotel. Does anyone on the team speak English? A couple of kids are pretty good. They have English-speaking schools. But some of the kids have no idea what I'm talking about. What was your relationship? No, I actually did show them the case race.
Starting point is 00:42:38 They loved it. Oh, hell yeah. Oh, yeah. It defied language. Worldwide. You can't just like, hey, come look at this. It was four hours. Yeah, come on. I was watching in my room. We're worldwide. You can't just like, hey, come look at this. It was four hours. I was like watching in my room.
Starting point is 00:42:47 People were like around. I was like, oh, this is what I do for my work as coworkers. Not really. No, I was like, this is my company. You would never be invited to one of our conferences, bro. Your company. This is Dave's company. Don't you ever forget that.
Starting point is 00:43:00 Wait, did you score? I'm a goalie. It's a no. Damn. Yeah. It's like loophole city. No, wait, did you guys do well? We won all five games. Oh, fuck you. Wait, did you score? I'm a goalie, so no. Damn. Yeah. It's like loophole city. No, wait, did you guys do well? We won all five games.
Starting point is 00:43:08 Oh, fuck you. Wait, what? You're going to the Olympics. Who'd you play? Other countries? Yeah, so we had our group. You played Slovakia? They were there.
Starting point is 00:43:15 We didn't play them. We played, what was it, Portugal, Greece, Norway, Poland, and the Netherlands. This is like everyone's dream to be like. Who's the best? An Olympian at a shitty sport? Yeah, a shitty sport in a country you don't even fucking... You weren't born in. We went 5-0 with Wales.
Starting point is 00:43:31 Went 5-0 for the two teams. Welch, they're good. Yeah, so we went... We're going to be in San Diego next summer, end of June, early July. Playing who? For 10 days. I don't know yet.
Starting point is 00:43:41 This is like the world lacrosse games, I guess. Are the games telecasted? It was on YouTube. Can we pull it up? Are you going to practice at all? I played beer league beforehand. To the people who
Starting point is 00:43:59 from a beer league to an Olympian. Yeah, but it's again my high school team would compete with this team. Right. No, no, no. I know that. I'm not saying you're good. It's still awesome.
Starting point is 00:44:09 Right. That makes it more awesome. You were doing the dream. Everyone has that dream of like, oh, where are my great grandparents from? Could I compete in this fucking random sport? My dad's like from, from there. Right. Like born and raised, like came here when he was like 22.
Starting point is 00:44:23 Nice cars. Yeah, this is This is What it was Wait where are you? If you guys hypothetically Like went to the Olympics Would you guys Completely smoke?
Starting point is 00:44:32 Here we go Are you guys the other team? That's Portugal Who is good at Who's the number one right there? Oh man right there Number one That's fucking hilarious
Starting point is 00:44:39 Who's that old guy? You just How long were you gone for? I was there for 10 days So I left last Thursday, just got back yesterday. Way to go, bro. Thank you. That's sick.
Starting point is 00:44:50 That was fun. Oh, man, that's really cool. How's their national anthem go? I only know three words, and it's Kdej Demov Moi, which means where is my home. Oh. Yeah. No, but the Czech language is very useless. Nails on a chalk.
Starting point is 00:45:05 These guys look like premier athletes. That guy got a ponytail? He hates to sleep. I don't know. I'm the one American on the team. 12 is a nerd. They hate you? No, they like me.
Starting point is 00:45:18 Enough, I think. What about their Czech goalie friend? He's like 18. They're a big box lacrosse country. I don't know what that means. It's like in the hockey room. They were like pads, right? Like a hybrid with hockey.
Starting point is 00:45:30 How do they banter in the locker room? They say a lot of shit that I don't. They haze you? No. You're saying the penis? Would you know if you were hazed? Yeah, I would know. No, they didn't haze me.
Starting point is 00:45:40 I just had to kiss all their dicks. I've been hazed. I've been hazed. I have not gotten hazed. You love Trump. What was their opinion? They, I honestly, like, nothing. I wish I had conversations that were, like, meaningful.
Starting point is 00:45:54 I didn't really do a whole. It was a lot of, like, how are you guys doing? Yeah. It's just interesting that your dad's an immigrant and you hate them. I never said that. No, I'm kidding. I'm kidding with you, brother. No, it was fun.
Starting point is 00:46:03 So who'd your dad go with you? He went last time. Didn't go. Because, like, again, like, Ukraine stuff's going on, too. So, I'm kidding. I'm not going to do it with you, brother. No, it was fun. So who did your dad go with you? He went last time. Didn't go. Because, again, Ukraine stuff's going on, too. What's going on in Ukraine? My parents were a little freaked out. Shafter's Twitter.
Starting point is 00:46:13 Yeah. Yeah. But they're going to come to San Diego. Well, yeah. Yeah. How was the food? Really nice folks. That was my one big complaint.
Starting point is 00:46:22 The food. The food was just god awful. Why? What did you eat? It was just, like, every every day just the same potatoes. A lot of pierogies. It was not even. Not even. Pierogies are great.
Starting point is 00:46:33 One thing they do do well is the harums. Have you been? Harums. Oh, you've been? The orgies. Yeah, it was. Have you been? You'd go to the basements.
Starting point is 00:46:40 The Czech harums. I don't know how to pronounce. Harums. Harums. You'd be being an expert on every country the Czech harems where the one guy
Starting point is 00:46:50 gets poached from the street and then like 30 plus women fuck him I don't know why you're asking me
Starting point is 00:46:56 like I've done this this is a popular 30 women that fucked you even if Jake was there he wouldn't have he was poached he would have
Starting point is 00:47:02 stood in the corner yeah I was gonna say this is relevant to you the harems the harems Even if Jake was there and he was poached, he would have stood in the corner. He would have stood in the corner. Yeah, I was going to say, this is relevant to you. The harems. The harems. They do those well. If you're looking for the level of competition, this guy is on the Norway team. Have a good time.
Starting point is 00:47:16 And he looks like this. But his name is Thor. So I actually, someone sent me this. I don't know. I never saw this guy. The fighting pastries? I don't know where I never saw this guy. The Fighting Pastries? I don't know where that's from. That's unreal.
Starting point is 00:47:30 That's amazing. I don't think that that's real, but if it is, then that's great. It's like the Denmark Uncle Drew. Yeah. What's going to happen if you make it to the Olympics and you play the U.S.? You'll get killed. I don't know how exactly it works. I'm pretty sure it's like skill-based matchmaking a little bit where they kind of put you in groups.
Starting point is 00:47:49 In the Olympics? No, that's not how the Olympics work. No, like next summer, that's how it kind of works, is the World Lacrosse Championships, they have groups. Right, but the Olympics. The Olympics, I would love to play the U.S. I think it would be like a lot of fun. You would not have fun as a goalie.
Starting point is 00:48:03 No, but it's like it's a once-in-a-lifetime kind of deal where it's like you play it against the best of the best. A traitor to the team. That. I think it'd be like a lot of fun. You would not have fun as a goalie. No, but like, it's like, it's a once in a lifetime kind of deal where it's like, you know, you play it against like the best of the best. That's how it should be. Whereas a high school
Starting point is 00:48:11 football team that has a school of 300 kids can't compete against a school with 500 because it's unfair. You skipped an Olympics. You said 2028.
Starting point is 00:48:19 It's not going to be in 2024? Lacrosse is not being added till 2028. Oh, so you're not going to do it? How old will you be? I'll be 29.
Starting point is 00:48:26 How old is your backup goalie? 18 now. Four years younger than I am. He's going to mature into a great goalie. I hope he does. I'll still go, even if I'm not starting. Carrying two goalies to the Olympics? Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:48:38 That sucks. I'll totally go. If we go, I'm going to go. I think you're going to get reported. No, I don't think you're going to. I hope I do. I don't go nearly enough or practice nearly enough to, like, get a starting goalie. How long have you been on this team?
Starting point is 00:48:49 This was my second time. So it's three years, I guess. That's pretty cool. Nobody else in the country plays goalie. So, again, they don't play field lacrosse as much as the U.S. guys do. So, like, no one's playing goalie consistently enough for it to matter. Box lacrosse isn't, like, they wear, like, hockey pads. Yeah, so they're totally different. They fightie consistently enough for it to matter box lacrosse isn't like they wear like hockey pads yeah so they're totally different like a lot of though
Starting point is 00:49:09 right don't they fight exactly but my like the goalie thing like it's not a translatable thing from box to field as easy as to go from playing out an offense to playing out in uh boxer versus field how did this originally come about did you have this idea yeah so i interned um actually the coach for the czech team now was my boss when i interned in 2018 it was in netanya israel and i interned at the world games for like whatever help it was i like helped with the broadcast and the laundry and i was just like a little bitch boy for the three weeks that i was there and i ran into the czech coaches that were there at the time and introduced myself. I said, hey, I play goalie.
Starting point is 00:49:46 I have a passport. Yada, yada, yada. I got set up. Went over to Prague the next year and just been playing and talking to them ever since. It's been cool. That's awesome. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:49:54 Congratulations, brother. Thanks, man. Bring home the fucking gold, bro. Fucking gold. Why not us? Six years. Why not us? Cool.
Starting point is 00:50:02 I'm going to leave this here, too. It's a Demon Time hoodie if anyone wants it. Oh, he's the brain behind Demon Time. Wow. An account. A little account. It's more upstairs if anybody else wants more stuff. Can we see it?
Starting point is 00:50:11 Yeah. Just got the demon on the back. That's sewn in. Embroidered. They'll pull our splurge for us. It was pretty cool. Why? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:50:19 But there's some shirts upstairs, too. I want one. How long have you guys been doing that? Oh, they're giving me that. That's fine. How long have you guys been doing that? We'll they're giving me that's why. How long have you guys been doing that? I'll wear this tomorrow.
Starting point is 00:50:27 Two months. How old's Anus? 18 months. 18 months. Huh. Yeah. That's fine. They're hilarious.
Starting point is 00:50:34 You got a full file of them ready to rip. Good shit, Jake. Bird dogs. Use promo code Yak. I'm wearing them right now. They're all the time You can shit in them
Starting point is 00:50:47 The built in underwear Pushes the shit back in your butt I love these pants so much I wear these all the time XL shorts bro They're smalls More pants in there or only shorts Who needs these XL shorts
Starting point is 00:51:07 use promo code yak please use promo code yak threes get a free bird dogs dad hat with your pair of bird dogs you will not take these things off I promise you I'm wearing them right now I've been wearing them non-stop I love bird dogs. Worn for the case race that we won. What was the other cheating allegation that TJ had? That he drank during timeouts. Was there another thing? I think they were mad somebody wasn't back during a timeout. Oh, that, yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:39 Dana, apparently my slap wheel, apparently I won the first wheel. Hold on, give me the one at the bottom. And Dana won the second one. We, like, forgot. Well, Dana, I won the first wheel. Hold on. Give me the one at the bottom. And Dana won the second one. We, like, forgot. Well, Dana got justice when I murdered him. I think that was before you even went. Yeah, I know. But him advancing meant that he got more.
Starting point is 00:51:54 Oh, yeah, I guess. These feel like pants. Should we spin the wheel? Yes. I shouldn't have left it all the way until. So, take off piss break. And then, do you guys want to keep slap wheel? Yeah. Yeah. I don't. left it all the way till. So take off piss break. And then do you guys want to keep slap wheel? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:07 Yeah. I don't. I think slap. I don't love slap wheel. I can't vote for slap wheel to get taken off after I slap the fuck out of half the show. So it's up to you guys. I think slap wheel is the best. I think slap slaps are consistently funny.
Starting point is 00:52:22 Yeah. Despite, you know. It happens. What? Like you know. It happens twice. The odds of it happening twice. The wet wheel has been ran dry, because we know what's going to happen. We haven't done it in a long time. But it's still like someone emerges wet. What about kiss ball?
Starting point is 00:52:37 It's mildly fun. It's more of a kiss than slap. You guys have to put on your – how many beers did you fall short? Oh, man. Yeah, I will do penance for that. I was zero short. Oh, yeah, we need to add that. Add my 12.
Starting point is 00:52:50 How many were you short? So if he was zero short and you guys had 17 total, that means that you need nine, KB. Nine what? You have to put nine on your sliver. No, it's fair. Yeah, I barely. I probably had like three.
Starting point is 00:53:03 You only had five beers? I can't drink beer. I've been going to the doctor for it. They never diagnosed me with anything. Now it makes sense why we were like the most annoying ones, me and Sass. And then everyone was like, Jesus, shut up. You had three beers? You were drunk.
Starting point is 00:53:19 You had to deal with that? No, it wasn't... I apologize. Well, no, I apologize. No more apologies. We can't apologize anymore. We can't. I apologize. No, I apologize. No more apologies. We can't apologize anymore. We can't. I've been wasted on the program.
Starting point is 00:53:29 That was funny. It was really funny. What about like a mixed drink? What about like a mixed drink? I can do liquor. You can just equal the alcohol. All right, so KB has to drink nine drinks. KB, nine drinks.
Starting point is 00:53:39 Nine shots. Nine standard drinks. Seven drinks. Whoever he wants. Seven drinks. That'll just be fun. And what? You should have just let you drink something else.
Starting point is 00:53:52 Yeah, we said that a bunch of times. I wasn't agreeing with you. I honestly thought I was going to be able to put him down. No, we just said that right now. I should have just gotten you some of those little rosé. I felt full as fuck, though. That was like the thing that slowed me down the most. I did drink a lot of beers.
Starting point is 00:54:08 I felt like a tank. I just felt so full. Still got it. You do. 15 is impressive. 14. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Someone actually DMed me, and they said that they counted.
Starting point is 00:54:19 I counted. It was 14. He said I did 11, and Big Cat did 13. I counted. It was 14. That's impressive on both your parts. Dana is a certified beast. Dana also didn't stop drinking after it ended.
Starting point is 00:54:31 Dana went through the wall. Oh, man. Went through the other side. He was trying to prove something. Yeah. And he proved that he can't, when he drinks too much, he just doesn't speak. When do you guys go to Chicago? My flight's at 8.30 tonight.
Starting point is 00:54:44 So tomorrow the show will be from Chicago And then we're going to tape right after for Wednesday's show Excellent And then are you guys back for Thursday's show? I am back for Thursday and Friday I am back for Thursday and Friday Same We're definitely Thursday
Starting point is 00:54:58 Do they have a shower in Chicago? What if we get No, we're fucked We have to get pissed on Yeah, you just got to find another way to get wet A white socks day I just have to find We have to get pissed on Yeah you just gotta find another way To get wet White Sox Dave I just have to find another way
Starting point is 00:55:07 To get wet I try to crowdsource loud Yeah Where in Chicago? Anyone has loud There it is That was the crowdsourcing It's dispensaries in Chicago
Starting point is 00:55:17 Crowdsourcing done It's dispensaries on every block bro Fuck that Alright spin it Homegrown Brandon are you still mad That you're not coming to this trivia live show? I was never mad. Oh, you were so mad.
Starting point is 00:55:30 Never was I. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Of course. I fucking told you. Of fucking course. All right, all right. I mean, that's funny.
Starting point is 00:55:45 It's funny. That's funny. God damn it. That's funny. Make the bracket. Make the fucking bracket. Let's burn through this shit. Jesus.
Starting point is 00:55:52 Let's whip through it. Yeah. God damn. I mean, you have to. That's pretty funny. The wheel. It has a mind. First round ante.
Starting point is 00:56:02 You have to admit that that's funny. The wheel has a sense of humor. Yeah. The wheel always has. It has a mind. First round ante. You have to admit that that's funny. The wheel has a sense of humor. Yeah. The wheel always has. It's devious. Fuck. God damn it. And I'm like, if I match up with TJ or Roan, I could die.
Starting point is 00:56:18 Yeah. Because both those guys have. Neither of them have cracked a smile since it landed on slap. They have a grudge to settle, and I understand that. TJ punched you in the face. He did. TJ, I woke up with a hurt jaw, and I was like, what happened? I also woke up with a hurt jaw, yes.
Starting point is 00:56:35 And also your dad. My dad couldn't stop talking about how many people were following him on Twitter. Yeah. Good, because that loser needs a break. Right. Yeah. Like, of all the things that loser needs a break. Right. Yeah. Like of all the things that I regret,
Starting point is 00:56:49 the one thing I know is calling TJ's dad a loser. You double down hilarious, triple down hilarious. When you quadruple down, I was like, oh, fuck. That's kind of really mean. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:57 But then the quintuple down when you made him admit his dad was a loser. Yeah, that was funny. Yeah. I feel like I might slap someone back instinctually today when I get slapped. I'm trying to think of how I would police. Do you want to just go 50-50 bracket?
Starting point is 00:57:16 Yeah, let's go 50-50. We'll just spin for the matchups. So every bracket, the eighth seed has won. Yeah, I've been fucked as a higher seed every time. Statistically unlikely. So I was not here, so we have nine. So somebody will spin the buy. Okay.
Starting point is 00:57:32 So someone will spin the buy first. Let's put Pete on it. Seems to be leaving. I don't think he's here. Oh, no, someone will spit. So this will be for the buy. This will be the person who just doesn't have to compete in the first round. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:46 No sound. No sound will be for the buy. This will be the person who just doesn't have to compete in the first round. Yeah. No sound. No sound doesn't count. No sound. No, but it didn't count. Are you kidding me? I'm going to get the box. Are you fucking kidding me? Nice.
Starting point is 00:58:02 16, man. Someone's going to have to slap four times okay so this is for what seed two two will go against the nine that's a strong two seed oh never that and now this is three
Starting point is 00:58:22 I can't believe it landed on slap so that's three out of the last four Oh, never that. And now this is three. I can't believe it landed on slap. So that's three out of the last four. Miss Erica just walked by. I'm just... We spun three. We got two slaps and a wheel reset. Brandon, very nervous. What do you think, Erica?
Starting point is 00:58:44 Hey, Erica. We just got slap wheel again. Yeah. We're all think, Erica? Hey, Erica. We just got slap wheel again. Yeah. We're all going to have to slap each other. We need a tenth. Hi. You want to slap somebody? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:52 Hop on the mic. Hop on the mic. Oh, Kimmy, that was bad. She definitely hates you. She hates you, but she loves Sass. Which one do y'all want to slap each other? Each and a mean girl pod. She hates you, dude.
Starting point is 00:59:04 Not Deanie Martin. What seed is this? What seed is this? Three or four? Four. Four seed. It's going to be Ronan TJ in that eight, nine. I got to go pee.
Starting point is 00:59:23 I'll be right back. Sweet. Who am I going to ask if I'm two? We're going to find Roan and TJ in that 8-9. I'm going to go pee. I'll be right back. So, wait. Who am I going against if I'm two? We're going to find out. Nine? Yeah, the last person on here. No. I go against Nine.
Starting point is 00:59:32 You have the bye. Yeah. Watch back, KB. You narrating the wrestling. It was fucking weird. Don't make it this bracket because I'm confused now. You're making it. Jay's got it.
Starting point is 00:59:43 So, is there any match-up set? This is about to be the first set matchup. No, this will spin for who slaps against Roan. Who's up against Roan. So you know it's a play in nine versus eight. Yep. Is this the play in? Oh, fuck.
Starting point is 00:59:55 No, no, no. This is just who goes. The last two are the play in. No, no. The one seed. Eight and nine. The eight and nine play in to face the one. But he fucked it up.
Starting point is 01:00:05 I have a procedure. I'd argue that this doesn't matter. It's 1 by 9. No, dude. Oh, man, I just got karma for that. Let's try to cheer up Brandon. He seems down, doesn't he? Well, he's a pussy about the slap wheel.
Starting point is 01:00:20 Because he's like in the South. Another man slaps you. You have to kill them. That's his high intelligence. The trajectory of his life is on the line. Dude, You have to kill them. That's his Scientologist, too. The trajectory of his life is on the line. Dude, it's just a slap. It's almost actually a litmus test. Can you chill?
Starting point is 01:00:31 Can you be slapped by your homies and not get slapped? Where's everybody going? Chicago. Chicago. All right, so we have a slap. Are you coming to Chicago? You should get Brandon a leash first. He's going to be there, just like heavy hitters and shit.
Starting point is 01:00:44 Yeah, it sounds like just everyone but me and Owen. There was a moment in time where you almost were in. For Chicago? Yeah. Why? They were looking for a replacement for Dave. That would have been bad. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:57 That's not my thing. Your RA at DePaul DM'd me. He was like, just give me the word. I was like, I don't know what that means, but I kind of know what that means. I think he has some shit on you. I don't even know my RA. He knows you, brother. That's not true.
Starting point is 01:01:16 Intimately. The only thing we ever got in trouble for was extension cords. Seems like it could be a thing. Like a big deal. Extension cords? So does 8-9 slap... You have it, TJ? Can we see it? Does 8-9 slap to go against number one?
Starting point is 01:01:34 Or does Big Cat get a bye and two goes against nine and three goes against eight, et cetera? Why is he so down? He said everything Went wrong In his decision to His very impactful Decision to move Is this his decision
Starting point is 01:01:52 Or was it his Just to a different place With his whole family Why did he leave again I don't know I don't know bro He's scared of the slap This fucking orb
Starting point is 01:02:03 It really is like Quit touching it, dude. Stop telling me that. You're touching it and then touching other shit. You're probably dead in the fucking interim. No, you're not supposed to touch it. You're just trying to have a superiority over me. I'm trying to help you.
Starting point is 01:02:16 I'm trying to be a parent and ape the generation before you. I'm going to touch it, and I'm going to pick at it, and I'm going to pluck at it, and I'm going to try to pop it with my fingernails. Are we agreeing that the slap wheel can never go backwards, so my last slap was the baseline? Yep. Sure.
Starting point is 01:02:35 Your last slap shook my head off the axis. Dude, you took it like a champ. It removed my head eight inches to the left. I had to blow my nose. I didn't want to come out when I get slapped. What's the matter with you? I'm not sold you have a spine. You seem down.
Starting point is 01:02:48 I'm not. Yeah, you do seem down. No, I've had a runny nose. I didn't want snot to come out when I got slapped, so I went and blew my nose. Are you a little down? Because that's okay if you are. It's okay to not be okay. There was a snot situation.
Starting point is 01:02:59 Mental health is important. I'm being serious. I care about you. I'm not. I don't. Okay. All right. Thank you. I am not. I don't. Okay. All right. Thank you.
Starting point is 01:03:07 Just had snot in the nose. Wanted to make sure. Wasn't a visual. What about moving to Alabama instead? Is there cheaper houses there? When in football. I am considering other states now as well. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:20 Or how about Memphis? The Atlanta area is at play. Okay. You're going to go to Buckhead? New money bullshit? That's not The Atlanta area is at play. Buckhead? You're going to go to Buckhead? New money bullshit? That's not where I would go at all. Just somewhere in the suburbs.
Starting point is 01:03:31 Buckhead. Bankhead? Buckhead. What about Bankhead? Where's Bankhead? Atlanta. Oh. No.
Starting point is 01:03:42 All right, who's slapping who? EJ and Nick Oh no I hope I lose I love brackets Not me against KB I love brackets I just hope I get slapped by KB So I can kind of get it over with
Starting point is 01:03:58 Just be out of it I respect you How many days in a row Would it be funny if the slap wheel hit? I think it's over. 15? Probably 15 days is where I would start geeking out a little bit. Holy shit. That would be the...
Starting point is 01:04:13 We need to get this going. I got to get to the airport. Let's go. 6.30. The airport. I'm very serious. Nick is being dead serious, by the way. He's that angry.
Starting point is 01:04:22 We went to the Super Bowl. Our flight to LA was at 1 o'clock. I showed up, and Nick was like, I was like, how's it going? He's like, I had breakfast and lunch here. He showed me. He got to the airport at 7 a.m. I get nervous at airports. I just got to get there and get adjusted.
Starting point is 01:04:36 I agree. That's so weird. I would already be there right now if it weren't for this show. I like to go. So unhealthy. I like to leave like 40 minutes before. God, no. I don't rush. I don't ever have to run through an airport.
Starting point is 01:04:50 Not when you have clear. I got clear. I haven't been to one airport with it. They have it in Denver. What are you talking about? I got it on the other day. You haven't been on a plane. You've been to a plane? I flew this morning. From where? Florida.
Starting point is 01:05:05 To where? Here. To where? Here. What airport in Florida? RSW? What the fuck is that? I don't fucking know. You've been to one airport without flying from Florida. JFK didn't have it either.
Starting point is 01:05:14 That's why I really needed it. JFK has. No, they don't. They do. What do you mean, look it up? I fly out of JFK all the time. JFK is clear. Look it up.
Starting point is 01:05:21 I want to get where I was today. I got it. It was fucking expensive. I don't have time. How much was it? $175. All right, let's spin this. Let's get this it where I was today. I got it, and it was fucking expensive. I don't have time. How much was it? $175. All right, let's spin this. That was $109.
Starting point is 01:05:29 It's $109. A year? Oh, man. You got the Luxe clear? There you go. Terminals two and four. Boom. That was terminal three.
Starting point is 01:05:37 Makes sense. Is there an acronym? Must be. All right, let's go. So Nicky can get to the airport. I got to get there. I gotta get there. I'm actually starting to get nervous. You want out?
Starting point is 01:05:51 I just gotta go there. I gotta eat. I gotta take my Oh, it's me versus TJ. Second round. This is not what I want. I'm so tired. I know, TJ. You owe me a slap. Although you did punch me. Alright. Alright. TJ, you owe me a slap, although you did punch me. All right. All right.
Starting point is 01:06:09 What are the odds that we get that again? No wet wheel, Sass. Yo. Talk to me, Goose. Talk to me, Goose. Portnoy, talk to me, Goose. I'm a rapper. It's a directional mic, so you have to talk directly into it.
Starting point is 01:06:27 It's all Will Smith's fault. Just give it to him. Just end him. Finish him. Kidding. Go easy on him. Finish him. Oh, you fucking crushed me.
Starting point is 01:06:46 I'm sorry. Okay, good. Hey, Slidon, we're back. We're back. All right, good. Nick, that was a good tone setter. Like you were frustrated. Good tone setter.
Starting point is 01:06:59 Owen, hope you saw that tone setter. I did. Brandon, did you see my slaps on Thursday? I did. It was a lot. All that power. slaps on thursday i did it was a lot all that all that power brandon i think twice because we hit the fucking wheel twice oh okay so you could either go double power or slap twice three of the last four wheels double double i did two two squared three of the last four wheels have been slapped, which like... Yods. It'll never happen again.
Starting point is 01:07:25 Ever. Like Steven's basement flooding. Yeah, we're in the golden age of slaps. We are. Yeah. All right, who's up? We're going to look back at this fine. Me and KB.
Starting point is 01:07:37 Are we seed or just next time? Yeah, just go down the line. Run and KB. Yeah, let's get this shit done. I'm sorry. I should be sitting at my gate right now. You can go. You got slapped. No, I'm team player. If I miss my flight, it's on you guys.
Starting point is 01:07:52 You are. Always have been. What happens if you miss your flight? You just go to the next one. That looks like a summertime drink. Mellow yellow. Jesus. How'd this happen? How? How'd you get in the tank?
Starting point is 01:08:14 Thank you everyone who's Not the lump Break open the lump. Break open his lump. Imagine if it just squirts on you. Oh, he hit his... Oh! That was a disrespectful slap.
Starting point is 01:08:34 Now Rowan's hand's going to have it. Maybe when's your flight? We have the same flight. That was so funny that you guys had, like... 6.30. I actually think there's not more. There's no city connecting. Maybe D.C.
Starting point is 01:08:54 where there's the amount of flights from New York to Chicago every day. There's like 60. It's definitely New York, Chicago. Yeah. There's so many. Some reason. Who's that? Who's that on?
Starting point is 01:09:04 That's on Grandin. Grandin. I gave 100 bucks to her See that part Brandon? She was She was She was drunker than all of us So drunk Underrated wrinkles
Starting point is 01:09:15 I don't know She was wasted She was fucked up How is she here? It's Friday night A lot of people were here drinking A lot of people were drinking along with us Yeah she was
Starting point is 01:09:23 It was couples night so I don't know. I miss it. I kind of want to just become an alcoholic. Yeah. But does it lose its fun? Yeah. I don't know. I really like it.
Starting point is 01:09:31 Yes. Yes. If one person today had been like, let's do it again, I would have done it again. Spin that thing. Slap his ass. Oh, fuck. Hold on. Oh, he pulled.
Starting point is 01:09:47 He pulled. Damn it. He doesn't know how to do a slap. On your knees. Hang on. Get the angle right. Doesn't know how to do a slap. It looks like such a light slap.
Starting point is 01:09:58 Is it because in the south, if you slap a man, you have to die? I'm ready. That's all I know. I know. You're good. He fully dodged it, though. That was kind of sweet. Yeah, it was nice. That's all I know. I know, I know. You're good. He fully dodged it, though. That was kind of sweet. Yeah, it was nice.
Starting point is 01:10:07 That's good instincts. All right. Next, next, next, next, next. I have a great feeling about this next one. It's going to be different than the last two. I agree. What's that? Have you got a pulse lap wheel?
Starting point is 01:10:18 Huh? What about dick flick wheel? Yeah, we can flick each other's heads. I'm down to change it after this. You want to change it after this? Yes. One flick to the balls. Oh.
Starting point is 01:10:28 Or the head of the tennis, I think. Or we have like a tennis ball that if you miss, you miss. Yeah, a throw. Like a wall ball thing? Yeah. We should make it slap wheel or dick flick wheel. So it's one or the other and the person has to close their eyes. Oh, I like that.
Starting point is 01:10:44 Oh, I don't like that. I love that. Make them get slapped. I'm never going to hit you in the balls if I have a chance. About Oklahoma drills. Oh, always. Oklahoma drills with our hands behind our backs. This has really shown a lot.
Starting point is 01:10:54 Yeah, I'm a violent person, I guess. You're a violent sober. Yeah. Yes, you're getting slapped. Pop those glasses off. Close your eyes. All right, we'll retire slap. We'll figure out something else.
Starting point is 01:11:06 What should we do in place? What's opposite of slap? Oh. That wasn't bad. Wasn't bad. Yes, it was. That was fine. That was fine.
Starting point is 01:11:15 We've all been bad. We've all been bad. Nothing can be as good as what I put on. I'm just trying to get some good karma on my side. Yeah. Get fucking roundhouse. Slap of a grandpa-less man. You need to step in.
Starting point is 01:11:28 Oh, listen. This whole thing here. Is TJ against Big Cat right now? Yes. Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. This is Duke Carolina shit. There is some bad blood on my MISU teams.
Starting point is 01:11:49 Oh. There is some bad blood around one of these two teams. Oh! What if I just was like, nah, I'm out. Yeah. This is bullshit. Fuck this, dude. I'm not going. This is my show. I would be fine with that.
Starting point is 01:12:03 That would be cool. That's nice. That's a good moment. Brothers forever. Hit him. Hit him. I don't even get hard anymore. While we finish this out, what should we do?
Starting point is 01:12:38 What should we do in place of slap wheel? It needs to be some sort of physical contact. I agree this has now run its course, so we'll move on. But what do we do? Let's finish it off, TJ. It's me against you now, or there's a bottom? There's one more bottom, and then there's Final Four.
Starting point is 01:12:55 What do we want to do? It doesn't have to happen. Slappy will have an orgy. What about you spin something and you get smoked in the shin with a razor scooter or something? Yeah. I did that yesterday at Easter. You were on a scooter yesterday?
Starting point is 01:13:10 Yeah, motorized too. Oof. How about we – if we get the nut tap, it's one person loses and everyone gets one throw. Oh, fuck. You did it like 15 times. It's dangerous. But that's funny.
Starting point is 01:13:24 Nut taps are funny. It is. And I'm down to play the odds of I'll never get picked. People in chat saying taser wheel, karate kick wheel. Taser wheel. Hot wings wheel, spanking wheel. Can we buy a taser? Should we do that? Bare ass throwing eggs at each other.
Starting point is 01:13:38 Something spicy. We're trying to kill ourselves. I think eating something spicy would be funny. I see that. Hot chick wheel. You should have a sliver of the wheel that's just 20-20 yak. We can just talk. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:13:51 What should we eat? Hot chip? Oh, hot chip almost killed Sam. Hot chips are insane. They're insane. They've gotten hotter. Hot chip didn't almost kill you? Paintball gun wheel?
Starting point is 01:14:02 That was the peppers. Well, paintball gun. Cinnamon challenge? Paintball would wheel? That was the peppers. Well, paintball gun. Cinnamon challenge. Paintball would be good. Saltine challenge. And if you don't pass the saltine challenge, you have to get like a lick of salt. Maybe like how Frank has his salt. You just take a lick of it.
Starting point is 01:14:18 Spin it again and keep taking suggestions from the chat. Why don't we bring our ideas tomorrow? Trip to the finals. Trip to the finals. What about... Damn! Sass, get up and slap your boy. I don't want to slap him.
Starting point is 01:14:40 What about loser has to... I always knew it'd come, but... Like this. Ooh, we could do... We could have a dry wheel, and if you lose that, you can't shower for a week. Ooh, I like dry wheel. Oh.
Starting point is 01:14:57 Okay, that was... That was good. Yeah, I killed the slap wheel. I did. It's always going to end that way though I think there's Killed it in the right way It was
Starting point is 01:15:08 Yeah And KB came out saturated Yeah That was the funniest The right wheel was ever going to be Right And you beating the shit out of all of us Was the first
Starting point is 01:15:16 Yeah I killed it I'm sorry guys It's over It's okay You were too good Finish this off Let's go through the motions
Starting point is 01:15:21 But we do need a replacement Well I mean Jerk off wheel Yeah you have to go jerk off Finish this off. Let's go through the motions. But we do need a replacement. Well, I mean. Jerk off wheel. Yeah, you have to go jerk off. I always like. Clothes swap wheel. Oh, clothes swap is good.
Starting point is 01:15:36 All right. Son of a boy down in the finals. He didn't get sassed in the finals? Jesus Christ. What? Why? Last person I wanted to go up against. What? Why? Last person I wanted to go up against. Really?
Starting point is 01:15:50 You're going to hurt me. Brandon, what is your idea? I don't have one. Did you think I had one? You said let's do ideas tomorrow. We need to find Brandon a house or build him one. Or a prescription to Zoloft. I could do that.
Starting point is 01:16:06 No, your penis will stop working. It's fine. I'm done with it. No, you're not. It's retired. You need it now more than ever. My dick is retired. I just want to set the stage real quick.
Starting point is 01:16:19 This is literally the last slap wheel that will ever happen between in the yak. Not until we want to bring it back. We want to bring it back. You guys really. Peel to a hard ass slap. You should really send it out with a bang. Oh come on. Yeah you're going to have to. You're going to have to.
Starting point is 01:16:29 Pander to the DJ. Like the people are going to be very upset if this thing doesn't go out with a bang. Creep. Get away from me. What if we do a creep wheel and you have to be like a pervert. Is that Sean Connery? If we just have to be a pervert on some shit. Sean Connery dead?
Starting point is 01:16:47 Yes. No. Maybe? Yeah, he is, but that was him. Sean Connery or Gene Hackman? One of them died. Oh, Gene Hackman. Sean Connery's dead.
Starting point is 01:16:55 Sean Connery did. Remember that marathon of the rock? Sean Connery's the one that liked slapping women, though, right? Oh, yeah. Loved it. Or was that Gene Hackman? What about a vacation wheel? Yeah.
Starting point is 01:17:06 Yes. A good wheel. A good wheel. We get to go to a Bora Bora wheel. Or like first class upgrade wheel. Some shit like that. All right, we'll think of something. The chat should just leave their comments.
Starting point is 01:17:18 Leave them after the show in like the actual comments. We're only going to read it if you also like the video. Yep, and subscribe. And we know how to check it if you also like the video. Yep, and subscribe. And we know how to check that. Yeah, all the... Hear me out. An applesauce wheel and you have to eat a whole thing, a whole container of applesauce, a whole tub.
Starting point is 01:17:34 I done forgot about applesauce. Yeah, I know. And that's what's funny about it. You gotta have like a happy home to ever eat applesauce. I know. That's when your home is the happiest. Yeah. Cinnamon and shit.
Starting point is 01:17:45 Vanilla. A pint of ice cream is is the happiest. Yeah. Cinnamon and shit. Vanilla. A pint of ice cream is kind of disgusting. A pint would be gross. That's like the most happiest home side dish of all time. Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 01:17:55 Wedgie wheel? Oh. Fucking applesauce. Wedgie wheel would be funny. Brandon, what would you be okay with? What's something that- I'd be okay with anything.
Starting point is 01:18:04 I'm down for whatever. You're down, period. I can tell right now. I'm down. You sound like it. You're so down, dude. You're depressed. I had to get rid of the snot.
Starting point is 01:18:11 Get some diced peaches and that gel. What about like how you could roast each other? Those were good. Peaches were good. You just didn't want to fuck with the gel. You just had to kind of. How about a baked goods wheel? Someone has to come in with a fresh cake that they baked
Starting point is 01:18:25 or some shit the next day. They have to keep listening to people talk about their moms, like, baking. Oh, it's the worst. A cook wheel where we had to cook for the rest of the show. That would be something. We're just bringing a cooked item. Something where it's shitty for the person to have to do.
Starting point is 01:18:39 I'll get to slap him. What is this? Best of one? So this is the last one ever. It's the last one ever, so? Best of one? So this is the last one ever. This is the last one ever, so whoever wins, please do it justice. This will be on the DVD of the slap wheel. Just remember that. Okay.
Starting point is 01:18:57 When are the coins in circulation? Soon, I think. Is it best of one or best of three? Best of one. Best of one. Best of one. Let's get this. Slap the yawns out of you, boy. Actually, you're definitely going to wind up slapping me.
Starting point is 01:19:14 And it'll be fine. Oh! SAS Championship. SAS. Common SAS W? SAS. Can I just get you Pumped up real quick Before you do this
Starting point is 01:19:27 Oh I know what this is gonna be Can you just come over here Sass Better be the one minute trailer Of Son of a Boy Dead Hey what's up everybody See that That's what I did to his ass No but that's what I did to his ass. No, but that's what I did to his ass.
Starting point is 01:19:47 Look at his face. He looked like fucking Ichabod Crane. Motherfucking Ichabod Crane. How's my head still here? Are you going to slap me? Watch your hands behind you. His chest is puffed out I like his sweatshirt
Starting point is 01:20:08 Puffy as shit right now, Roan What? No, that's completely illegal Take it like a man You slap him like a man Give it like a man That was a good slap Alright we'll think of something new
Starting point is 01:20:27 Leave the comments Tomorrow we'll be in Chicago As well as what should we do Should we do something with the Maybe hour two Let's do something With the Chicago guys Yeah
Starting point is 01:20:43 We should do like a fucked up draft for the second hour of the hour. Yeah, we should. How about we do like a case race, but it's a draft. Let's do a co-lab. It's like draft beers. We could do a draft with the Chicago guys. Let's do a co-lab draft with a spin. Ron, when is the realest coming out?
Starting point is 01:21:00 The nicest. The nicest. The realest. Is that too? May. Mid-May. Mid-May. The nicest Is that too? May Mid-May I did mistitle it But it was incredible to watch
Starting point is 01:21:12 It's only the better Nick came through as well I'm fascinated by battle rap How so? I think it is an incredible skill I think it is Kind of nerdy in a way. Very.
Starting point is 01:21:26 I love it. It's a bunch of different talents packaged together, I feel. It was cool. Yeah, it was good fun. Very good, very good. The boys were laughing, so that was all that was important to me, that guys like Nick and KB and Owen. And Immortal Technique rolled through.
Starting point is 01:21:41 Immortal Technique and that bitch. Among other people. Straight up. Straight up. So check for that when it Among other people. Straight up. Straight up. So check for that when it eventually comes out. Big summer. Maresh was in the building too.
Starting point is 01:21:50 Yak Idol's good. We didn't even invite him. He was in. Oh, I've caught some, like, Yak Idol is going to be incredible. Incredible. Also, what are the dates for that? We are in on, like,
Starting point is 01:22:00 the one thing we did learn from the case race, doing the taped show that then we can air and interact with Is a big plus So we're definitely doing an escape room We're definitely going to do the tread water challenge Definitely going to play some basketball
Starting point is 01:22:13 Definitely going to play, do manhunt Like some kind of manhunt game Or like a red rover Or some paintball type of shit Paintball would be awesome Skydive episode Why don't we do basketball next week In Paintball type of shit. Paintball would be awesome. Skydive episode. Mm-hmm. Why don't we do basketball next week?
Starting point is 01:22:29 In. When is Barstool vs. America? You guys leave next Tuesday, I believe. Thank you, Owen. Shit. See you next Tuesday. All right. Oh. Hey.
Starting point is 01:22:43 Dude, you're so bad what the fuck One love. Subscribe to the channel.

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