The Yard - Ep. 75 - He challenged Hasan to a fight. (ft. Mang0)
Episode Date: December 14, 2022This week, we are joined by Mang0! The boys talk about the chessboxing event, Mang0 retiring and how Aiden has had enough of influencers....
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Yeah, whatever, you're ready.
Come on in.
Get involved.
You gotta one-check it.
Oh shit.
Oh!
Oh!
That was graceful! Oh, that was impact. Oh shit. Oh That was graceful
Oh shit, welcome to the yard
9.5
With an Estus in hand as well. I don't really know what episode we're in you're gonna make sure that mic is pointed towards your mouth here
We should call that Estus because Joshman
Yeah, can we start by saying how much we hate Joshman? Yes, sir. Okay
You hate Joshman? Don't you?
What has he done to you dude? He sent me a picture
of Pipsqueak. With a fade?
Yeah. You know the picture?
Yeah I know this one. Okay I have not seen this.
Why did he send you that?
Cause he asked me to play
and I was like you gotta beat
S-Fob if you wanna play me.
Wow.
Dude that means
Mew2King can't play either damn all for a meeting burn
Two for one deal for mango. No he lost cuz like someone here you go. He gave him a headset that weekend
Some some mics go straight up Some mics go straight out.
And all of them are beautiful.
Some of them curve a bit.
You know what I'm saying?
And that's okay.
Hey, welcome back to the art, everybody.
It's episode 83.
We're joined here by the GOAT.
84.
The GOAT number.
It's going to be in the 80s, finally.
You know what I realized?
If we're going by the rule that we set in the last Mango episode,
we not only have this episode, but we have two more episodes.
We owe you a total of three, and we're doing one now.
I'm not counting Low Trash City.
Why?
I'm not counting.
They change your name too much.
It pisses me off.
Also, it was a Panda tournament.
Oh.
That one goes away for that.
So I'm in a weird spot with that.
Panda?
You're Team Panda?
Well, I was Team Panda. That'd be funny. Oh, my God. So I'm in a weird spot with that. Panda? You're Team Panda? Well, I was Team Panda
to be funny.
Oh my god.
So you.
It's just way better
to be
rooting for the evil side.
Yeah.
The evil side's way funnier.
It's easy.
Team Nintendo though.
He was Team South
back in the 1850s.
With the Pandas
because they keep emailing me
because they need my bank account information so i can get
paid for that tournament but i don't want to give them my bank info so i might just i don't know
what to do wait wait wait wait why would you not want to give me because you don't trust them with
your bank info i just i don't know you don't want the money they might also go under so you should
give them the info so you give them your info and then you give me the money i think that wouldn't work
why that seems no because we have to pay taxes that's laundering it's only like 2k you can't
pay the taxes for your boy well i think you have to pay the taxes anyway because then he pays you
double jeopardy you have to pay tax no no we offload it we expense it and we we reduce the
burden to mango that's actually this is fine it just, you don't want it to go straight
to him, Mango, because this is bad for you.
You're paying the taxes. No, it's the same.
It's just an extra step. No, no, no. This is the
same thing that you do when you ask
me or Aiden to buy you a Nintendo
game so you don't have to pay
Nintendo the money. Yeah. But it's the
same thing. No, it's not. It is.
How is it the same thing? Because he's paying
Nintendo and you're paying him. Yeah, but he can do anything he wants with my money right but like but like you know he's doing
it for you you're asking him to do it yeah but it's his money okay okay okay it's like it's like
it's like buying meth on the street but you're like having aiden do it and you're paying aiden
yeah i guess actually no it's kind of smart yeah right it's like it's like having and buy the beer for you, but you're the one drinking it you're still getting the calories
No, it's not it's not that you're still no
No, he's the one who damage is being done to you
I'm loading the ethical burden
Yes
As well as any sort of extra work that he would have to do by typing something when I was 18 in college
We wanted to drink beer
So we went to a circle K down the street in Phoenix, Arizona.
And it was me and my two buddies.
And we had like 20 bucks, I think, between the three of us.
Jesus Christ.
We were broke.
20 between three boys?
We're sitting across the Circle K at this bank.
We're waiting for people to show up that we think look good.
And we find this dude who pulls up in a truck and we walk up to him and we're like, hey, can you get us some beer?
And he looks at the three of us and he's like, what do you want?
And we're like, whatever 20 gets us.
And he's like, all right.
And then we go back across the street to the bank and we sit there and we wait.
He's in there for like 25 minutes.
We're just waiting.
We're like, did he escape?
And like, what is he going to do?
Go to the bathroom?
Eventually we see him get out.
We start to walk over.
He gets in his truck and he drives away.
Wow.
And we were fucking gutted.
We were gutted.
That's the toll.
We had no beer and no money.
What did he look like?
Was he the older guy, younger guy?
He was like a stocky 45 year old construction looking worker guy.
He scammed you.
And he saved you from a lifetime of addiction.
Think about that.
Wait, no.
I still drink beer now.
You know what I'm saying?
No, I don't.
You've never had a drop since.
I have had a drop.
And that's beautiful.
He saved your life.
He made you.
He made you.
No, none of this is true.
You fell off.
You're drinking beer right now.
You're drinking beer right now.
Don't talk to the goat that way.
It's because Mango's guy said yes and got him the beer.
He had to do time-wise and got him the beer. The two-time race.
Okay, okay. You're a father.
You're a father. If your kid says,
Mango, can I drink a beer?
At what age are you like, yes. Is it 21? Hard?
No, 17. 17?
In the mic. In the mic. 17.
I think 17 is the best age
to drink.
I'm not condoning. That is so much
different. I'm not condoning. What about it? i'm not gonna let my kids out it because i think
17 because i didn't drink you know while we're you know we're on the podcast i got stories
you know i was the kid who never wanted to drink and i told myself when i was like 15 because like
i grew up in norwalk and everyone was fucking drinking at like 14 15 and i was like i just
didn't want to do it because i thought you
know i had morals i guess i don't know little kid mango if you ever met little kid mango you
would love him highly passionate he was the most like he lives inside me but he gets older mango
just kind of bullies him dude there's this there's this old youtube to tell you obviously
there's an old youtube account that i found that has all these super fucking old Melee videos. And
there's one of you and you're getting your hair
cut before a tournament and you're
fucking a kid. You're like, I think you're 11
or 12 or something. You're really young.
I was like, this is so precious.
I don't think people realize I've been playing Melee since I was
14. I just turned 31
two days ago. That's actually
crazy. And then I fucking announced my
retirement and everyone's like, no, I'm like, bro,
you want me to play
for 20 years?
When it's all said and done,
I will drop a 20 burger
in melee years.
Yeah.
Yeah, but how about like...
Still got one up by Juan though,
so...
He can't one up me.
How about he go win a tournament?
Then he can one up me.
How about that?
2016 Juan's calling,
all right?
Come on.
He was good back then.
2020, 2023 chess boxing.
Hey, you have to pay me 50K.
What?
That's it?
No, don't say that's it.
Oh, 50.
We'll think about it.
I know you're paying everyone else.
Zipper cue poll to tweet.
Look at Juan de Biedma's twitter.com.
So chess boxing event happened last night, of course.
And there's a lot to talk about from that.
But one of the interesting things is that I saw a tweet right after it ended from Hungrybox.
Yeah, I thought it was funny you responded right after it ended.
Yeah, right after it ended.
That was the thing that got you to respond.
Well, I'm on social media.
I'm soaking it in.
I just had finished.
Beautiful moment.
Yeah, beautiful moment.
I'm looking at all the praise.
And then I saw this tweet, and it says, I just had finished. Beautiful moment. Yeah, beautiful moment. I'm looking at all the praise. And then I saw this tweet and it says,
let the record show. It was supposed
to be me and Mango, but he
pussied out because
if he lost, he said he couldn't live with it. And then
Ludwig instead wanted me to fight the 6'4 beast of a man
that is Josh Man. Josh is not a beast. No beast of a man.
6'4 beast of a man?
He's just tall. And then
Josh broke his arm. Now we're here. Fuck.
Click that tweet and then scroll down to my reply.
So what actually happened?
Sorry, we have Ludwig blocked on Zipper's account.
Okay.
All right.
Well, what actually happened?
Where is it?
Look, hey, Zipper's got me blocked.
What actually happened is that Hungrybox was never supposed to fight Mango.
He said, I want to fight Mango.
And then I said, Mango, do you want to fight Hungrybox? And he's like, no. And then I was like, all right, Mango doesn't want to do it. said i want to fight mango and then i said maybe you want to find your box he's like no and then i was like all right maybe i just want to do
it do you want to fight josh man he waited six weeks kind of like saying yeah no yeah i'll do
it but like can i get more money than other people yeah you know and then eventually on like the
sixth and final week where i had to make a choice because the event was like literally six weeks
away i was like what do you want to do he's like
no I'm not gonna do it
none of this is what your tweet said
that's crazy that he painted it that way
that's just not what happened
Hbox is a gaslighter
it's also funny cause you
Ludwig has the
dick to go on Twitter cause he rarely
does it he rarely like engage in like
confrontational discourse that's why I was shocked to see it.
Yeah, it was like,
damn, what was that?
No, Juan, this isn't how it happened actually.
Well, I added a nice thing at the end.
It was a shit sandwich.
Love your energy.
Yeah, my last thing I said,
I love your energy.
What a nothing thing to say.
Yeah, love your energy.
Honestly, like.
Because, well, you said he was down a box.
Sure.
What if,
I just felt like I gained nothing
from fighting Juan.
You don't.
I'm hard expected to win. And just the image. said he was down a box. Sure. What if I just felt like I gained nothing from fighting Juan? You don't.
I'm hard expected to win.
And just the image.
I don't know if you are expected to win, by the way.
Yeah.
I think you're expected to lose.
I feel like you gotta be in shape.
You're talking about vibes.
Look, let me say this.
I think that if it was wrestling,
I hard expect you to fucking win.
No, I destroy.
Juan's not.
I've seen Juan throw a football,
and I've seen him catch a football.
Is that it?
This is intel.
At least athletic human I've ever seen in my life.
He gets tired after 20 seconds.
I would expect you to lose.
Why?
You think you have stamina?
Because you drink, and you don't have cardio.
No, I have the greatest cardio.
What?
What are you talking about?
How?
No, no, no. This body was supposed to go to go to the Olympics instead I chose to sit here and play marquez could have been on the Olympic team nobody believed you know when I you i don't so after melee was like 2000 something
and melee i had so you know in high school i had like 10 grand from all my mail yeah yeah and i
just kind of coasted on that obviously i didn't have bills but eventually i got down to like 200
dollars and i was like and i dropped out of college and i was like well shit i'm like what do i do now
because melee was like in a dark era and i kind of didn't want to play i was like, well, shit. I'm like, what do I do now? Because melee was like in a dark era. And I kind of didn't want to play.
I was like, what can I do that doesn't require school?
And I was like, well, I really like fighting.
I was like, I think I want to be an MMA fighter.
So for like four or six months, I played.
I didn't play melee.
I didn't play anything.
I worked out.
I was running 10 to 20 miles every day.
No shot.
No way.
10 to 20 miles?
10 to 20 a day. Do you shot. No way. 10 to 20 miles? 10 to 20 a day.
Do you know how long that is?
No, no.
That's a half marathon every day?
Yeah, towards the end,
I was running about that.
I didn't just start that way.
I ran, you know,
two, four, five.
But every day,
a half marathon.
Can you run a mile right now?
I could on pure hate.
So you're going from 10 to 20
to one mile.
The most hate him through hatred.
The most hate him, every step he's like, fuck I want to pussy.
It's been a long time. Cody sucks.
It's been a long time.
Well I would run like 5 to 10 to 15 depending on the day.
Towards the end I had a little four pack.
There's one picture on the internet somewhere, I gotta find it.
Mango had a little four pack, I was fit.
And then I was gonna, I was about to take boxing classes.
But I wanted to get my stamina up.
Cause I figured, as you saw yesterday, everyone fucking tired it's like i didn't want to i was like i'm gonna take classes but i want to be
like really have crazy stamina and i was gonna do it and that week armada fucking posted like
well i guess i'm the best winky face smiley face and i was like and i have not worked out since
wait wait wait so you never boxed no No, I didn't get the chance.
But he could have been.
He could have been.
He couldn't have been a trained fighter.
I know, but what he said.
No, but I was getting my stamina.
It was his destiny to be a trained fighter.
Dude, we're the same, actually.
I was getting my stamina.
You said you were trained to fight Golden Glove Marquez.
You were going to be one of the best.
You just ran a lot.
Yeah, because I was getting ready.
And then Armando interrupted.
He makes sense. I understand. I was getting ready. He makes sense.
I understand.
So is your point that you'd be willing to train?
What's your point? Yeah, I would train.
I believe that.
My body is... You think your body's a temple?
You know how
bad I treat my body and I'm just this kind of chubby?
You are like Slime because
Slime in the premium episode said within
a year he could beat me
in boxing if we both trained
Yes!
And I think you think you would beat most people in a year if you trained
I'd beat anybody
I'm just saying
It's wrong
Is it wrong to be strong?
Do you think it's wrong what Slime thinks?
No I think that's the part
I think if you're going to be a fighter you gotta be a to be a fuck you kind of fighter. You can't just go around
being a humble little fuck. I think when it comes
to fighting, you've got to be, I will beat your ass.
You guys are hurt fighters though.
You've got the mentality before you've got the body.
He's just saying all the things that are running through my
head, except it's coming from someone who's accomplished.
So listen up, Ludwig.
I'm inclined to believe that he ran 10 miles a day
because he's number one in the world at something.
Yes, I have drive and passion. Yes, sir. You're not number one in the world at something. Yes, I have drive and passion.
Yes, sir.
You're not number one in the world at anything.
Oh, that's not true.
One thing.
Fucking.
There's also a timeline.
There's also a timeline where Mango just carried Liquid to a blast final victory.
Like, there's also the Counter-Strike Mango timeline.
Yeah, there's Counter-Strike Mango.
There's a lot of butterfly moments.
Legends Mango.
Yeah, there's a lot of butterfly moments in all of our lives. Bronze Butterfly moments. There's League of Legends, Mango. Yeah, there's a lot of Butterfly moments in all of our lives.
Bronze 4 to Gold in one month is impressive.
And no one can tell me otherwise.
Bronze 4 to Gold in a month and a week.
Listen, I was saying, and I wanted to bring this up, Ludwig,
and maybe fighting you, whatever.
You would never do it.
You're a pussy.
But I deadass, I was talking to Atrioc at the function, calling him out.
If we do this again, put me on the fucking stand.
No, you backed out last time.
I didn't back out.
No, he didn't back out.
It was a medical thing.
Yeah, it was a medical thing.
I know.
And is it gone?
Yes.
I literally told you.
I told you about my medical history and you didn't listen.
Also told us that.
Yeah, I do remember that.
That's crazy.
I'm just paying you back.
You're the liar here.
And I went up to Atrioc and I said, I want to fucking rip your head off.
And he's like, I would fucking kill you.
Next year.
It's already, the animosity is already there.
I think what happens.
Put me in, coach.
So the, the, the, the chess boxing event was born for two reasons.
One, I saw that video on YouTube like six years ago.
And then two, I always thought it'd be fun to do smash boxing, which you tweeted about
slime.
Yeah.
I think it was at shine where i was
trying to pitch the idea to be on the summit in the snake known as ken chen yeah ken chen said
we cannot have people hit each other we will get sued we can never do this and i would every three
months be like hey what about boxing ken and he'd he'd pretend that he has to say the same thing
yeah i pitched them the uh the obstacle course and uh i got in trouble for that yeah and then
they ended up doing it. Because two people
got hurt. Cody got a hernia
from that. But it was cool. It was cool though.
That's also basketball. I shot down
basketball because I don't want to deal with fucking
Cody. Sorry, he has to be the default complainer.
He's a good default complainer. Cody
jamming his finger trying to catch
a basketball. I start right, go left versus Cody
and both of his ankles turn in half.
He's looking like the John Lennon plug walk.
He turns into Plato in front of me.
I can't handle the guilt, you know?
So, yeah, I'm saying right here, right now, Ludwig, if this happens again.
Wait, wait, wait, I'm not done.
So that's where the idea spawned.
That's where the idea spawned.
Here we go, man.
These are my dreams again.
I had that smash boxing idea.
And then I have now developed enough money that I can make it happen without needing
a production company to back it.
It was so much money.
I developed enough money.
It was a lot of money.
How much money was it, roughly?
Thank you.
Are we allowed to say?
I talked to Nick Wang.
What do you mean?
Why are we not allowed to say?
I said it on the broadcast.
It was 1.6 million, I think.
Yeah.
And guess what?
You can't pay me back.
What?
We're really close.
We didn't hit it, but we were really close to being in the green.
Wait, I was told we were
no Nick Wang messaged me last night
undercover and he said okay
true final numbers not in the green
but super close and I'm like that's crazy
I saw the revenue number and I was
like damn that is way higher than I thought
come on baby come on baby almost making money
so it's called the loss leader the secret $1
tickets you know who I wanted to fight
yeah who Hassan I told you I gained 200 pounds whatever was needed It's called a loss leader. One dollar tickets. You know who I wanted to fight? Yeah. Who?
Hassan.
I told you, I gained 200 pounds, whatever was needed.
200 pounds?
I'm learning that you don't know how numbers work. 200 pounds in a foot of height.
No.
It's just about weight, right?
No.
Reach matters.
So much about reach matters.
I know reach matters, but...
He's six foot, like, six.
And?
You're five foot eight.
Imagine that image of Mango King ready to go. That image of Mango King. I know reach matters, but he's six foot like six and
How hugs actually looked at the fight
Jump to hit his chin. I'll go for stomach shots. He tossed tweeted a et OSS. I also missed
What did hugs just? win in the first round?
Is that what happened?
We're not going to talk about that.
Just know that poor Tov got.
He won in the first boxing round.
Wait, wait, you were, finish your thought.
So anyway, that's where the idea originally spawned.
And then we made it happen and it cost a lot of money.
And when I started making everything work and I started asking people to come do it,
it was right after Creator Clash, right?
So like we had the idea so funny because the ref
standing next to Hugo is so flat when shorty don't let you hit so I reached
out to everybody after creator clash and everybody was down yeah everybody was
like yes oh let me fucking fight bro. Let me fucking get in that
ring, bro. And then
everybody flaked one month
later. Because nobody
actually wants to punch or get
punched, I think. I think they'd like
the idea of it. The amount of people who got
concussions in an effort to either
do the event or at the event made me
so scared of it. Also, I should
have not had that Korean barbecue.
Yay.
Ben Tublestone.
Ben Tublestone.
Tublestone, boys.
Yeah, Mango tells us
he thinks Ben's last name
is Tumblestone.
It's not.
That was his colonial ancestor.
And then we told him
his real last name.
He goes, it's close.
It was close.
It's not.
It's not.
You guys view things very differently.
Oh, yeah.
I agree.
No.
I agree.
What?
I have to be in your corner a lot for this episode because of all the things you've said
about it.
I'm telling him what 2 plus 2 is, and he's like, we just see it differently.
We do.
I don't think 2 plus 2 is 4.
I think it's a little more intricate than that.
I think that so many things aren't black and white.
Okay, can I show you a video?
I don't think so.
Yeah, he's right.
This is your guy.
This is my guy.
That's right.
Ride or die.
Wait, let me tell you something.
I want to show you.
Well, you said you versus San.
Zipper, I sent you a video, and I think this is what I'm imagining you versus San to be like.
This is Nicholas Pettis.
This is Chris Broad's coach for this event that we just did
He was a k1 professional fighter in Japan. You can go to like three minutes
But this is him versus like this super fucking huge Korean dude. Oh my god. Oh my god. You don't think that's badass?
Well, okay. I will give it to you. Wait is this kickboxing? It's kickboxing. I mean they are kicking.
He's just like fuck it, let's go.
Is this soccer?
Oh,
what?
Technique wins.
It's kickboxing.
He broke his shin.
It's this David versus Goliath
and this Korean guy
has got to be like
six foot eight,
270 pounds.
I think Nick's like
five,
10,
210.
And if it's above 200 pounds,
the weights don't matter anymore.
You can skip forward
like 30 seconds.
And so he just keeps kicking this right leg.
And there's a few shots we can see just like blistering and swelling.
Yeah, I saw an MMA fight like this as well.
You just keep going for the shin and you can win on back to the shine.
Oh, you can knee the face and kick the body.
And so now this is, you know what, why I believe in you, Mango.
Yeah.
Because I saw this video.
Oh my god.
He got up there. Thighs doesn't matter in a fight. This guy looks like a terrible, why I believe in you, Mago. Yeah. Because I saw this video. Oh my god. He got up there.
Thighs doesn't matter in a fight.
This guy looks like a terrible fighter.
I'm with you.
Oh my god, he reached.
Check it out, check it out right here.
Oh shit, get your hands up.
Nope.
Nope.
Oh my, this is like Dark Souls.
He's literally like just a bigger guy.
He fell so slowly.
Yeah, he fell like You just fell
The Dark Souls enemy
Oh my god
So that's you
That's you versus San
Thank you
Okay
And San's wearing
Like a bolo tie
Yeah
As Golden Glove Marquez
Wow
I would've fought
Well if I fought
I would've fought
In like the really like
Like a Speedo-esque thing
What like Borat?
Kinda
I would've fought
I would've fought
Like a USA Speedo
Okay
Abs chiseling
I don't know Just the four pack Four pack Do you like Disguised hosts Captain America gloves? Those are cool Kinda. I would have fought like a USA Speedo. Okay. Abs chiseling. Oh no, just got to hang out.
Do you like disguised toasts Captain America loves?
Those are cool.
But I hate disguised toasts.
Why is that?
You hate him?
Because everyone loves him.
He's just like me!
I'm the same as the goat!
You have such hater energy.
I'm from the hood.
Who is that mean?
All my ghetto people understand.
We just are born to hate on everyone who's doing better than us which is everybody at all that is why
I despise Ludwig makes all sense no I do because you had a good family unit and a
strong emotion poor so you get it you know what I'm saying it port. So you get it. You know what I'm saying? It's the same shit. Almost. Not really,
but your dad dying card.
I'm getting real sick.
He said I came from a good family.
Your family was good.
Your mom loves you so much.
You're so dumb.
Oh,
she doesn't.
She hates me.
No,
she hates you actually.
I know.
Continue.
What are we talking about?
Your story. I hate him.
I don't want you,
but I think that everyone needs to be hated,
which is why I get why people hate me
Like I get it you just want to hate me because everyone else loves me
And I respect that
Whenever Mango meets anyone he puts them in the hated category
For an undisclosed period of time
Until you escape the hated category
Yeah it's quarantine
Well because like I hated you
But then I was like after so much hate I'm like he can take it
And then I was like Nick's alright
Did you hate me?
I never hated you.
Aw.
I just don't give him that. He's a Django fan, dude.
Don't give him that.
You know what I'm saying?
How can you hate Slime?
So many people haven't answered that question.
Yeah, there's a lot of people.
So many people can't describe why.
He just keeps it real.
That's why.
I respect that.
He keeps it wrong a lot.
He keeps it wrong mostly.
He keeps it real.
You can't say he keeps it real.
I haven't switched.
Slime keeps it real.
When all of you switch, I will be the last one standing among your switched corpses.
Pieces of shit.
That's the thing about Alex Jones is he keeps it real.
You know what?
You switch, bro.
How?
You want to know how you switch?
Fucking playing group activities.
He's like, how come I want to be invited to playing group activities now?
Yeah, because now-
I like having them.
Because he's a lonely bear now.
Because I-
He switched!
Whoa! He switched! Whoa!
He switched on?
You're Nick Yingling?
I switch a little bit.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I'm saying.
You just gotta know when.
Come to think of it,
I did switch a little bit.
That's a lesson
at the end of the movie.
No, but I...
Deadass.
You're saying that people
get really hyped on it
after a boxing event,
they drop out.
Yeah.
I was going to do it.
I was going to fight abroad in Japan.
I told Ludwig, I'm not hitting a girl, bro.
But I was like, whatever you got to do.
And then-
In the ring, we're all equal.
That's all I said.
That is so good.
You like that one?
And then I had heart problems.
I had to get my heart checked out.
Everything's fine, which I thought you'd be excited about in general as my friend.
He doesn't care.
He doesn't care.
And now I saw H-Roc,
I'm like,
I will fucking kill you.
I will kill you with my hands.
H-Roc won't do it.
He wouldn't even bungee jump.
Yeah, but God, if he did,
I would fucking,
I would love to get in the ring with him, sure.
I would make him bungee jump.
No, I don't want to skydive.
That's way scarier.
Boxing is way scarier than jumping out of a plane. No, jumping out of a plane is definitely. Oh, not for me. I don't want to skydive. That's way scarier. I think bungee jumping. Boxing is way scarier
than jumping out of a plane.
Oh, no, no, no.
Jumping out of a plane is definitely.
Oh, not for me.
I don't want to jump out of a plane.
I don't want to.
I would box way before jumping out of a plane.
Bungee jumping is more dangerous
than jumping out of a plane.
But I wouldn't.
I'm not talking about bungee jumping.
I'm saying boxing is more dangerous
than all of these things.
Let me rank everything.
Against amateurs?
No, it's not.
Scariest things.
Absolutely.
Scariest things.
Plane jumping out of,
bungee jumping,
boxing a truck
and destroying his fucking life.
It depends how you define danger.
How many people have died boxing?
I don't like statistics.
A lot more than skydiving.
Wait, is that true?
Yeah, for sure.
Died in the ring, not later from injury.
Why are you differentiating?
Why would you differentiate?
They still died from boxing.
Just because you made it to the hospital and died there, it doesn't mean
what's the window? This is Disney.
This is Disney when they take out the bodies
outside the park.
They drag them.
They die with a lot of people. Boxing is a
perfectly safe sport. They have like a
timer as they rush them out on a...
Time people died boxing. There's a
shot clock on Disney campus. We looked it up when we jumped
out of the plane. One in 500,000 people died boxing. There's a shot clock on Disney campus. We looked it up when we jumped out of the plane. One in 500,000 people
died tandem skydiving.
It's just as weird.
I don't,
it's weird.
Man wasn't meant
to fly.
Alright, hey.
But man was meant
to fight.
This is what I did
with these two
when we went skydiving.
Slime, Nick,
guess the number
between one and 500,000.
Uh, 200,000
and four,
214,999.
Oh my god, that was my number.
1,000.
Erwan, 117,000.
117,092.
Seven.
Three.
Four.
I mean, you guys are assholes.
Can you guess the number between one and 500,000?
I'm really top heavy here.
2,802.
Oh.
That's four.
You die.
Oh, it's not closest.
It's not priced as well.
No, no, no.
It's just if your number matches.
What are we saying?
Since 1890, more than 1,876 fighters have died as a result of injuries.
All right.
Now, since 1890, how many skydivers have died?
Fatalities by license.
Fatalities by total jumps.
That's nothing.
It's really tiny.
That's less.
And there's millions of people jumping out of planes on this fucking planet.
We need more engineers.
When did Fortnite come out?
That probably made the fucking number go way up.
It inflated it huge.
Why doesn't Jimmy do a fucking real-life battle bus? When did Fortnite come out? That probably made the fucking number go way up. That's true, it inflated it huge. Why doesn't Jimmy do a fucking real life battle bus?
He did.
Well, he did real life Battle Royale.
Battle bus.
But did you jump out of the battle bus and skydive?
He made a battle bus and gave it to Tfue and got like 20 million views.
No, they should jump out of it.
Yeah, they...
That would be so high.
You have to jump out of the battle bus.
They should do that.
You should do that.
You should do that.
Call him later.
Hey, here's your idea when you met him in person.
Eat a tire. So, you lost your chance, buddy that. You should do that. Hey, here's your idea when you met him in person. Eat a tire.
So you lost your chance, buddy.
That's a good idea.
That's a good idea.
I still think that.
He should still eat the tire.
Yeah.
Until he eats the tire,
you're my favorite
content creator.
Here's my question, Mango.
If you could fight anyone
in the Smash community
and you got to choose,
who would you fight?
In boxing,
not fight, fight,
like boxing.
Like in the ring?
Yeah, in the ring.
Chess boxing,
Smash boxing, next year., like boxing. Like in the ring? Yeah, in the ring. Chess boxing, smash boxing next year.
I guess just Zayn.
Well, you'd kill Zayn, so.
I would destroy Zayn.
I don't think you would.
I think he kills Zayn.
I think Zayn would train really hard.
I think Zayn could train as hard as he wanted to.
I fought Zayn, and I think, and I talked to Phil about this,
and I'm going to use it.
You either got that dog in you or you don't
when it comes to fighting.
And I think, as you saw last night,
I'm not going to name names,
some people got hit and you can tell
they just did not like being hit.
And I think that alone,
you could hit me right now.
If you wanted to punch me right now,
you could punch me.
Can I slap you?
If you want.
Well, I don't want to.
Okay.
This is also going to dispel the rumors
that my slaps were weak. Stand up up stand up stand up stand up come on
get the PTZ ready this is huge it's a big moment for the yard
up that was weak that's how you're hidden yeah I felt bad I felt bad as I swinging you didn't want it because that's why I don't harm you can fight
cuz you want me to slap you I slept no dog in so what I'm saying is you got to
either be able to you either can get hit or you can be able to hit somebody I
think most people don't want to hit
somebody else yeah right
you feel what's saying
the same shit yeah you
gotta like me if you put
me in a ring I will hit
you because I'm well
somebody's got I think
that Zayn could just take
a hundred punches at
mango and even if they
land he's tanking them
you there's one fight
that was on Twitter where
we did fight and I just
he just hit me a bunch
and I was like it was
like the minx fight like
minx got hit so much
more in her fight at
creator clash like churdley's uh wait what do you mean churdley's versus myth churdley's had a chin
no this is better the minx one is better because she got hit way more times but then she won the
fight by sure sure every punch she threw was just so much more weight fiction kalindi was like that
because kalindi always came out the gate swinging for 45 seconds yeah I talked to kalindi about it
he just would only go and then like
he only just held W.
Yeah. Which I don't think you can do in boxing.
You gotta...
If he just went 30 seconds, landed his punches
and played a little defense, he just went. He landed
a comparable amount of punches to Fiction.
But when Fiction hit Kalindi, Kalindi
got hit way harder. Like he couldn't take it.
After Kalindi was tired. Yeah.
So he couldn't defend as well. Fiction was the person
the whole time
that I had the most faith
in to back up
what they were saying
on Twitter.
Yeah, he was.
Every time,
every time that Fiction
tweeted something about
like I'm so fucking pumped.
I'm so good at this.
I've been training so hard.
I'm like,
I believe you.
Guys, Fiction was going
to tournaments
like smash tournaments
and asking people
to meet him
in like a meadow
and take turns punching him in the stomach just when was this dude every tournament yeah every
tournament in the past couple two months oh like in lead up to this i thought you meant like years
ago no no no that's why he got i brought my boxing gloves come punch me it's like a fucking carnival
right he was telling us in the interview he's been indoctrinating people into boxing in the
smash community so like they would meet after and they would do like light sparring yeah and that's That's so sick. He was telling us in the interview he's been indoctrinating people into boxing in the Smash community.
So they would meet after
and they would do light sparring.
Yeah.
And that's how he would get them into boxing.
Well, that's what you could tell Shep got hit
and he just didn't care.
Yeah.
That's what I'm saying.
You just get hit and it doesn't bother you.
Kalindi's also, his melee got so bad
as the fight went on.
Yeah.
I think the raps were making his life a little harder.
You kind of tell even in the first round they played but he was
only full hopping
Falco's the goat of
jazz boxing the meta
yeah wait really what
I figured puff and
Martha B I thought
it was puff being able
to just shoot lasers
against somebody who
probably does not want
to get shot or can't
move yeah imagine not
being able to move and
then this guy a fox
who only full hops
8,000 lasers yeah
dude no but Kalindi
nailed a wave shine
out of shield with
wrapping said that
on like the third
round it was unreal
sometimes it detects
there's certain lizard
braid things that top
players have like like
he couldn't short hop
anymore but he ledge
dash and it was like
six tingling oh shit
I was like holy fuck
I don't think he
thought about it but
there was certain
winners too
hello oh shit dude I just found out that mint mobile can save I don't even think he thought about it. But there was tournament winners, too. Hello?
Oh, shit.
Dude, I just found out that Mint Mobile can save you up to $15 a month.
No way.
I was so mad.
No, dude.
I thought you were taking a fucking call.
That's crazy.
Isn't it crazy?
He's way better than me.
You can switch to Mint Mobile and buy any three-month plan and get another three months free?
I thought you were going gonna rip with me when i
said it was sabrina tabernacle if ryan reynolds was here right now he'd look over and be like
damn that was good two people i wish weren't here sabrina and slime but i do wish i had a new device
which you can get for a limited time with six months of free service when you buy select device
and plan here's the thing you have to switch to mint mobile and now you might think that's a bad
thing because nick gangling does it all the time it is bad it is bad
and let's be clear
it's bad when Nick Yingling
does it but when you do it
to switch to Mint Mobile
and just to be clear
I've never switched
I would never switch
but I've just switched
now
to any different
you know what I'm saying
you know what I'm saying
look unlimited talking text
high speed data
it's fast and smooth
you know who uses
Mint Mobile
is Zipper
Zipper uses it
and how smooth can it get
is it as smooth as your
well, I don't want to say it.
Let's just say it's great all around.
The most
hairless wireless service, Mint Mobile.
MintMobile.com.
We'll keep it simple for you. MintMobile.com
slash the yard.
What happens, Ludwig, when you go there?
I already told them. They cut their fucking bill.
Just get the fucking thing.
What the what? I already told them they cut their fucking bill just get the fucking thing what to what
I already told them
I said it earlier
slash
you could have switched
anything about it
so what are you thinking about right now as a pure
spectator whenever the chess was on I
did not give a fuck I think I think what's cool
about what's cool about
melee boxing that wasn't as cool in chess boxing
was when you knew that checkmate
was close, it only ever got
hype if they didn't see it.
But if you kind of knew they were about to get checkmated,
you're like, fuck, they're not going to box again?
I feel like that was a feeling I had.
It's melee, so the game is hype.
But chess isn't hype, it's just...
But I think that did happen a lot.
What do you mean? Like, there was a lot of mates that were blundered and those were hype but i'm saying i'm saying as a sport
not our event like as a sport i feel like oh if it's like one move away like it was hype that
dana didn't see mate in one as the yeah i think that was hype but she should have probably seen
it but she didn't yes so that was cool okay but not as good as boxing i think the problem is like
for the average person in the
room and probably the average person watching online unless maybe i'm missing something because
like i you also don't have like the casters to like contextualize it to you but for me average
joe it's way easier to understand he hit him off final destination than it is to like oh what's
going on in this chest rose tinted glasses because you're
pretending to be dumb and say that's what people are thinking but me no no i'm measuring it by
noise i'm measuring it by noise in the arena like the average screams from the crowd during the
smash matches versus the chess matches are just like every stock very every stock that's taken
it's i think i think that well it sucked that the board wasn't working but uh i think the eval bar
could have been bigger
and explained more to like the average Joe
because it was really thin on the screen.
I think most people didn't know it was there.
I know it's there because I played chess.
We didn't put the eval bar on the main screen too
or talk about it because I think it's like,
it's information the fighters could have had.
No, it was above the head.
Right, but the one below wasn't there
and that's the one that everyone on the floor saw.
So we had the lower screen that was very large.
Where the walkouts would happen.
The chessboard was there with no eval bar.
And so no one on the floor could see it.
Oh, I was looking like this.
I was on the floor looking up.
I'll be honest, I could hear everything.
With the headphones on?
Yeah, when I was slapboxing.
Oh, wow.
Interesting.
Even then, they couldn't find their mates. But I think i think as someone who doesn't give a shit about chess that just the
literal visual like language of two heaving boxers like hunched over a chess board is still really
funny yeah and even though i didn't care about the chess and having casters and you guys be like
oh my god there's maiden one let's see if they see it and they don't like I was still hype
and I don't care
that's a good event
it's still really good
there's a really sick
shot in there somewhere
where it's like I
think it's like the
second or third
I think it's game
three of fiction
clindy melee and
they're both heaving
but they're forced to
play melee
they're just inflating
and deflating
it's so crazy
because they're
shirtless too
you can like see
their whole chest expand.
They're like drenched in sweat.
I think they were one of the best cards.
Best card, best card, go.
Andrea.
Easy.
Andrea was a fucking demon monster.
I'm Andrea Pilt.
I think it had to be something that was more...
It depends on how you measure best card.
Maybe Myth Churdley's.
Andrea fight got me the most hyped.
I was like holy shit
like the chest was sick
and her being an evil
demon was sick
and her needing to win
in boxing
it had everything.
I think Poincro Toast
was really good.
I'm seeing Poincro Toast
all the way.
I think it was really good
because Poincro came out
the gate kind of
fucking him up
and then Toast had a round
where he kind of came back
and he started swinging
at him too
and he landed a bunch
of punches
and then the chest
was like
like Po point crow was
one move mate and
one misses it by a
single queen space
uh has no idea he's
missed mate and one
you go to one chest
right there and then
toast comes all the
way back he point
then uh point crow
blunted his queen
and they got
concussions and they
both got concussions
does andrea know who
i am
only because i i
went up to her after
to like tell her like
oh my god you're fine
like I was like
giving her props
and then I was like
after I was like
Alexandra does not know
who you are.
I was like wait
I know that for sure.
I'm under the impression
when I'm at an event
that everyone knows who I am.
Not even like in a cocky way
I'm like yeah you know Mango
like but then I was after
I was like
I'm just like some
drunk beard guy
little short guy
and I just go and I'm like without context like who the fuck am I? I witnessed this I saw this happen was after i was like i'm just like some drunk beard guy little guy i just got
i'm like without context like i i witnessed this i saw this happen yeah i was like so i would just
tell him came up and he's like he was like i love the botes sisters with alexandra and i can i can
tell she had no idea who mega was yeah yeah so i i i stepped in because i heard this happen and i
was like hey i'll see you tomorrow like like like you are one of us you're a friend yeah yeah yeah
this is a fair assumption do we ever tell you I was like I might be weird I just assume like I'm just
some weird guy Ludwig sent Andrea a message just as do you know who this is
and it's a picture of mango smiling that he took today's replying he said she
says lol all caps uh he looks dot dot dot familiar maybe wow i think your assumption is fair because we i
did we ever tell you about that bts content piece that got made where we interviewed a ton of
counter-strike players it was a bunch of counter-strike players from all over the world
and they're getting shown different esports players from different games we showed them like
20 and uh from all of like the biggest games that you could play.
And you and Armada are in there for Melee.
And you were the only person besides Faker
that they all recognized.
That's what I think.
I just think I'm an esports legend.
I think you don't know who Mango is.
Here's a conversation.
I sent the picture to you.
She said, I don't know, looks familiar, maybe why.
I said, it's Mango.
He's a Super Smash Bros. player. She says, I don't know. It looks familiar. Maybe why? I said, it's Mango. He's a Super Smash Bros. player.
She says, oh, ah, yes, the Mango.
Big fan!
Six exclamation points.
And she says, I was kidding.
But yes.
Why?
She's like, I love when you do a fadeback Ariel on S.H.I.E.L.D.
She knows about Royal Flesh.
She's like, oh yeah, Royal Flush.
That was great.
That was a great set.
I watched Eric punt maybe $500 at a pie guy table because he's kept saying,
Mango won Royal Flush.
Yeah.
And then he'd push money forward.
Like it was his good luck charm.
His death omen.
And he just kept losing money.
Dude, on Point Crow, I mentioned it on commentary because that was really funny but
he was it was actually insane he was i i made a joke that he was begging for a cup
for his his his downstairs berries and cream but he he definitely in the discord was like hey can
we get cups hey hey like i really and you have to both agree to the gear that you wear. Yeah.
And he.
You can't even for cups?
Yeah, apparently.
I don't know. What do you mean?
You have to agree to cups?
That's weird.
If anyone wants to use something,
both people need to use it.
Both people have to use it.
And if no one agrees,
then we go with the safer option.
Okay, so you gotta force it.
He has to force the cup.
And Toast was like,
yeah, that's fine, whatever.
Like I got balls too. And then the only nut shot of the entire night was eric's and i was like
that's crazy what the fuck is that stands to tell me about all the boxing grime there's a lot there's
a lot of boxing boxing there's a cheese so you can get away with the nut shot you can get away
with a shot after the bell those are like someies. But also you step on someone's foot as they're walking back, like in the ring, and then they'll
like stumble and you can-
You're not allowed to do it, but you can get away with it.
It's warnings.
You always get one.
So you can always hit them with one cheese.
Yeah, one cheese.
You can wrap and then hit them a couple of times like when you guys are wrapped up.
That's crazy.
There's a lot of cheese.
I was happy to see no boxers do the fake tap grime.
I think that's like the worst shit.
When you go up for the fist bump before you fight and you swing.
Oh, that's like disrespect.
That happened in Creator Clash.
Right, but it's not even cheese.
That's just grime. You're a bad person.
He's a bad man.
Evil man. It's legal
though. I think it's just purely
grime.
Right.
I think the one thing that
we we haven't talked about is the andrea dina fight yeah the ruling just just a crazy roller
coaster so on the my perspective of learning about this is andrea came up to me sorry sorry
our beer boys getting no work it's's growing, right? Andrea came up
to me and was like, hey, and it was
while you were slapboxing, she's like, hey,
I don't know because he's up there right now, but
can you talk to Ludwig and see
because this happened in my fight and the referee
says this and I want him to
announce the overturned
decision on stream
before it ends. And I'm like,
I cannot do this because i i i have
no way to like in air you or anything i don't know who gets to make this call and at the end of the
night at the after party we're all getting like shuffled and kicked out of the after party and
you spent like maybe the last 30 40 minutes of the party sitting at a table with her three refs discussing what had happened in
the match and like the conversation is still going on like as people are getting pushed out
of the after party room and i was wondering if you guys made a decision last night because it
was a big it was a big fucking deal it was like what dominated conversation like all evening
we did so you watched the andrea dina fight you said it was your favorite fight do you think andrea should have won oh who drew the the streets know who won the streets know who won the streets
know who won so the thing is uh there was like uh i didn't realize until after but andrea's pretty
mad about the results well you fight you want to right you want to win if you didn't get your ass
beat or i don't know and so i uh right after the the stream ended i like like jacob comes up to me and he's like hey just a heads up
andrea might try to talk to you she's a little mad about what happened and i was like okay and
then she comes up to me and she's like hey the ref talked to me and he said he was wrong so do i win
now and i was like that can't be how that went and so i'm like well if he did
maybe but and so then we have like this round table meeting it's like the three referees it's
the chess boxing world champ it's matt the other chess boxing world champ it's like a documentarian
of chess boxing and we're all like okay what are the rules and uh and if you look at the tape
in the third round of boxing the sixth round their fight, if you get three standing counts or four total standing counts in the fight,
it's just an auto end.
And right before, like literally two seconds on the clock,
Dina gets kind of hit and then steps back.
The ref breaks them up because they're like grappled.
She rests her arms on the rope, which the ref immediately looks at and is like,
oh, you're not allowed to do that.
Starts a count.
He counts to like maybe one.
Here it is on the screen here.
So there's already been three standing counts in the fight,
two in this round.
If there's one more, Andrea should win.
So right here, they break him up.
Six, five.
Yeah, this was insane.
That arms on the belt is not allowed.
So he immediately starts a count right there.
Counts one. The bell rings. So he immediately starts a count right there. Counts one.
The bell rings.
And then he stops the count.
So it's a bit of a weird scenario there.
Now, the reason he started the count is because, again, arms on the rope.
He wouldn't have counted it if she could have put her arms up, which I think she was in
a good enough energy to do.
But you're not allowed to do that.
And the reason he stopped the count is because the bell
rang but you don't even need to count if it's the fourth one i don't think you're right you don't
count it's just you wave i think he like muscle memory saw oh person on rope must start count
not oh shit we're at the fourth count this is the decision maker so it was a wrong call it was
either a wrong call no i think the call was fine i think like because the final decision was just
flat out wrong because it was four tko's or four standing knockdowns well yeah what should have
happened is the fight should have ended there it was the fourth one he should have waved it off
called it the winner should have announced andrea by technical knockout because the round is ending
at the same time it kind of cuts everything off because the bell rang which isn't supposed to
happen during a count yeah he stopped and he's just like it like oh the bell rang and they kept going oh the bell the timer
supposed to freeze the timer counting yeah the timer was one second you don't
ring you don't ring yeah so there's a lot of fuck-ups and nobody at any point
said oh we should correct this live fight game rule of chess boxing.
Hold on. I made the LCS, everyone.
I say that.
I know what to do here.
Well, I just threw a Nick Allen straight,
but can I...
You see this?
Yeah.
It's a VIP.
You are wearing the same...
Oh, literally the same clothes
from yesterday and the VIP.
Oh, the wristband.
The wristband I gave you.
No, Nick Allen gave it to me.
No, I gave you two.
So you guys knew
the yard rankings
was Slime,
Lud,
Aiden,
Nick.
After last night,
Nick is now number three
and you've tumbled down.
Yes, sir.
Welcome.
This shirt is a memorial.
Mint tears.
What the fuck?
To your ranking in the
top two.
I've done nothing
to deserve this.
I've always said I'm the Falco of his life.
Yeah, Slime's my father. Top two and I'm not two. Top two. I've done nothing to deserve this. I've always said I'm the Falco of his life. Yeah, slime's my fault.
Top two and I'm not two.
I show up when you really need to.
We show...
I'm like...
I'm like,
Aiden, give me some fucking wristbands.
I'm like,
the whole time,
I'm not gonna go into it.
I didn't have a thing.
I didn't have a fucking pass.
I didn't have...
I had nothing.
I'm not gonna go into it, though.
I'm not gonna go into it.
We'll skip over that.
We'll skip over that.
We'll skip over the...
I'm not gonna go into it. Won't go into it it. We'll skip over that. We'll skip over that. We'll skip over the... I'm gonna go to...
Fuck.
Won't go into it.
Well, of course,
I did last minute
because I was supposed
to go to Smash World Tour.
I'm sorry if I came last minute.
Yeah, but even the day before.
Or...
Yeah, but I'm Mango.
I like to think
we're all good buddies.
I like to think that.
Are we not good buddies?
Are we not friends?
I like to think that
maybe I can show up
last minute.
I got you into everything.
I still got you tickets everything I still got you tickets
I still got you into VIP and open bar
I'm looking like a chump
And I gave you party wristbands
I gave you two
And I said, Mango, I'm sorry
I don't have a lot
And the fighters in their plus ones don't have any yet
And they need to get some
So I can only give you two
I was here, I was here, I'll step in I've always said Mango deserves three I was here, I'll step in their plus ones don't have any yet and they need to get some so i can only give you two right now
i was here i was here i'll step in i've always said mango deserves three i was here i was up in
after you give me your whole spiel i'm like nick allen can i get some he just doesn't even say
nick allen fucked me nick allen fucked me yeah nick allen nick allen moments before this when
we were together talking to nick allen he's like hey man I have a
lot of wristbands we can be liberal with them and in my head I'm counting them and I know how many
people we actually have to get into this after party and I'm thinking Nick Allen doesn't know
what he's talking about and not even 15 minutes later I am proven correct when we're all out of wristbands. Yes, I did see Nick Allen.
I have two, three groups of fighters and their parties standing outside the fucking party,
not able to get into the after party of the event they competed in.
Meanwhile, you and fucking Joey.
And Gio.
You, Joey, and Gio have wristbands.
You Joey and Geo And I'm trying to explain to Amon
Who just beat up Trent
That like I'm sorry
I can't get you into the after party right now
Sorry Trey the Trashman took your spot
Sorry Trey
Is in there right now
Trey and Geo
Trey and Churdly's
Fucking possum are in there
But you Amon who have a belt on, cannot get in because the fucking Galen Center sucked.
It was so funny.
I did run into Nick Allen by the security door because I put the CRT in my car and came back.
And I see him and he's kind of just like nervously pacing.
And I'm like, what's up?
And he's like, yeah, I'm just trying to like avoid people.
Like I'm getting mauled for wristbands right now. so that's funny because it lines up with how wrong he was
he came up to me he came up to me after he said that hey man I think we could be liberal with
these we have a lot comes up to me maybe 10 minutes later and he was like he's got like
claw marks on his face his shirt's ripped he's like uh hey so I'm actually almost out I was wrong
and I was like hmm maybe maybe Aiden knew what he was talking about the whole time Aiden's like, uh, hey, so I'm actually almost out. I was wrong and I was like, hmm
Maybe maybe Aiden knew what he was talking about the whole time. Aiden's like slime, Mango's like slime. He apologized
Yeah, we rectified it, but he hasn't apologized. He won't acknowledge that I've done nothing wrong
I was there. I was there and I saw what happened
I will say Aiden was posturing like Aiden was gonna like Mango was gonna get no wristbands
Yeah, he gave me an attitude like I'm not gonna get no wristbands. At first he was posturing like Mango was going to get no wristband. Yeah, he gave me an attitude like, I'm not going to get a wristband. At first, he was posturing like Mango was going to get no wristband.
And Mango, hold on, shut up, shut up, shut up.
Mango was badgering him.
Mango was like, you're not going to give Mango a wristband?
He kept saying that.
He's like, you're not going to give Mango a wristband.
I come to your event, you're not going to give Mango a wristband.
And Aiden's like, so, I feel bad for Aiden in this moment,
because he's got everyone coming up doing this to him.
And he has to like, eventually he will run out.
He won't even be able to hand it to someone to fix the problem.
And that person might be fucking, you know, excuse me.
It literally was Amon.
Who fought him.
Shut up.
Shut up.
You're a fucking asshole.
You're a fucking asshole right now.
So finally Aiden like disgruntled.
He's like, I'm getting, because he's asking for four.
He's like, I want four.
Yeah, that's insane.
You're such a fucking insane person.
He's like, give me four.
And Aiden's like, you can, you get two. And he like barely even hands it.
He barely hands it and mangoes snatch it.
You wouldn't give me four?
No, he wouldn't give you four because he doesn't think about anything!
He's not thinking about Amon thirty minutes later!
I actually had a solution for this.
I have a badge that lets me escort.
No, it didn't.
It didn't because I also have that badge
and it didn't let you escort didn't because i also have that badge they can't escort anymore
5 a.m today because i had a nightmare about tickets
an ethereal nightmare about yesterday that woke me up, even though I'm so fucking tired.
Can we have a moment of silence?
Because I think Aiden did a great job yesterday.
Not a round of applause.
Not a moment of silence.
The best part is I really tried.
I'll take it.
Joey's...
Two seconds.
Two seconds.
You fucked it up.
It's too late.
It's two seconds.
It's been one.
Joey's ethical.
Joey's like, hey man, maybe he's busy. I'm like, no, I don't give a fuck if he's busy seconds joey's at the goal joey's like i'll try hey man
like maybe he's busy i'm like no i don't give a fuck if he's busy he needs to get the show to be
a human yeah joey's like being compassionate i'm like no i'm like i've been i was just t-posing
like i just want to go in joey said the funniest fucking thing to me noel's coming he keeps no
keeps coming up to me he's like hey so you're gonna give me a fan the family code for that
merch you kept he keeps asking for merch i'm like you, I'm not, I don't have that power.
Like ask Aiden.
He's the only person who can do this for you.
I don't even know if he can do it for you.
I love hitting them with an ask Aiden on the one day that they probably
shouldn't be asking him for a merch code.
I just can't help him.
He will not stop asking me.
So I'm just trying to get away from it.
He's a geo.
And then,
and,
and,
and he's like,
bro,
I've been,
I've been wearing Mogamoo's merch before.
It was cool.
That is true.
And I said,
I know it's all you wear ever.
It's only clothes.
And,
and Joey right next to him. And he's like, I've been buying it before. It was cool. And then, uh, Joey never is true. And I said, I know it's all you wear ever. It's all in the clothes. And Joey got next to him and he's like,
I've been buying it before it was cool.
Joey never wears it.
He explained this. He goes, well, I don't wear it anymore
because Mango hates Ludwig, so.
Wait, wait, wait. That's different.
I just keep it hung up.
Wait, wait, wait. Defend this because you said
he hates me. He said you hate me.
Joey said this to me. He has a double entendre.
I don't think you know what that means.
Does it make sense?
Aiden Ross doesn't even know how to say that.
In some universe it does.
But Joey hates you because I hate you.
Because I do.
And then he hates you because he was really into Pokemon cards.
And he says you and all the content creators
made the prices go up.
It's been years.
I also talked to Joey
and the day after he
literally
if you go to his house
in his closet
you're the furthest thing
in the back.
You gotta put
way in the back
in the rotation.
He could have sold
his Pokemon cards
made some money.
The price is jacked up.
He's not a seller.
The way Joey
made it sound to me
was that him wearing the hoodie
just made Mango mad
out of principle.
Yeah.
You can't wear that
on my stream.
I talked toey and he's
like you know you're still our favorite in the household with me and kathy right i'm like what
really apparently joey's girlfriend kathy has been trying to get a ringtone of me saying bro what the
fuck from the lie detector video we did years ago she's that big of a fan oh they're like original
they they look yeah they're down with the cause. So you're out.
You're in the back
of the rotation.
Slime stock on the uptick.
Aatrox's neck
about to be broken.
Norwalk loves slime.
Slime's welcome in Norwalk.
The streets know slime.
It's mango fan.
Okay, wait.
I want mango, yeah.
We shat on Aiden.
I want to share
a kind moment
that I had.
Never mind.
No.
I went to say goodbye because i left the the vip
the party early and i go up and i'm like i'm going home man and i go up and i hugged aiden
and i hug him and then i kind of like feel his body move and and i look at him he was he was
crying and i'm like are you okay? What's wrong? And he's like, and I hug him again.
I'm like, it's okay.
Is everything all right?
You're crying.
And I hug him again.
And then I look at him and he's just, he's just crying more.
And I'm like, this reminds me, I was like, is it, are you, you're happy, right?
And he's like, yeah, and I'm like, okay.
And I hug him again.
I like feel like I need to take care of him
and I'm like okay I'll see you later
a little before that I even bug Aiden to
give me a charger
I don't know why
I think just being an annoying little shit
is so funny
even about coming here like I don't know why
I'm like Aiden I need a fucking charger
and then you want my responses
is it USB-C or is it the go You need a fucking charger. You need a phone charger. And then you want my responses?
Is it USB-C or?
You got it.
The go?
It's a go, bro.
What are you going to do?
Yeah, well, you do like being annoying because I gifted 100 subs to Zane and then you messaged me and you said, I saw that.
And I was like, I was like, saw what?
And you're like, gifting to Zane now.
And while you're liking other girls' Instagram posts.
And I told him, I was like, I have gifted you
like 10,000 subs
and he's like,
what's 100 more then?
Am I wrong?
I am your highest gift.
Mango messaged me
like last week
and he's like,
so we getting tattooed together?
And I'm like,
yeah, I'm super down.
And he goes,
all right, set it up.
That's not a Mango job.
It's not.
I'm going to set it up.
It's true.
No, I don't think you will.
I live my life very,
there's just mango rules.
Right now, this is what I think.
This is what...
Because this event...
The problem is, this wasn't a Smash event.
And it's the day...
You're making this as hard to deal with as possible.
You're towing the Mew2King line.
Because Mew2King...
Mew2King...
This is...
Mew2King, you don't get to do your Mew2King thing anymore.
You're not...
Yeah, except I get there.
You don't get to retire,
lose to S-Fop, and then
ask people for their prescription glasses.
You don't get to do that anymore.
Your behavior isn't tolerated.
That's why I say it.
And Mango is towing the Mew2King line.
Because you're showing up
on the day of,
asking for four people.
I get you into everything you need.
I even get you into the open bar.
Do you think this is consoling?
Somehow at the end of the weekend,
I'm moved to the bottom of the list.
He's so mad.
I'm so mad.
I'm so mad.
Come on.
Come on.
And the reason I throw
Beauty King onto the bus
is I hate that somebody
has the audacity
to do nothing in the community for three years and then ask me to fly them out to events.
Let me back you up.
Let me back you up.
I like Mew2King.
Mew2King hit me up and he was like, he asked, he's like, hey, can I come to your Smash event?
It makes you feel a little better, man.
He's like, hey, can I come to your Smash event?
The one that's happening next weekend.
I was like, yeah, sure.
You can come.
And he's like, all right, can you pay me for commentary?
I was like, that's not what I meant.
I was like, you can come if you want, but And he's like, all right, can you pay me for commentary? I was like, that's not what I meant. Dude, come on.
I was like, you can come if you want, but I'm not going to pay you.
He's definitely an asker.
Exactly.
Yeah.
Can we talk about your event next week?
Yeah.
And how you're going to have to pay me to go.
Okay, so, no, we're not.
See, I told the Michigan line, but it's a mango line.
So no matter what.
It's blue.
You got to pay respect.
You're right.
Why do you think I cave every time?
Yeah.
Why do you think at the end of the day, after everything that has happened, after the day that I had, I got you the fucking phone charger?
You got him some fucking nasty ass nares.
You got him a charger?
Yes, I plugged it in for him!
I fucking set it up!
I took his phone-
That's crazy.
That's so sweet.
That's crazy.
And you know why? It's because when Mango recovered against Swedish Shalite,
no one thought he was getting back on the last Saturday Night Live.
And he got back! And then he got back!
And then you got back! And how do you get back?
And then you got back! And you won Smash Summit 11,
and you're a good friend, and we all love you.
And he's winning with Falco in 2022!
You should move him up on the list.
No, that puts me down. We'll see.
But, I just-
Real quick, I actually do need a beer, Aiden.
Aiden,
I've been watching,
I just finished watching Sopranos.
So I'm like,
to me it's just,
you gotta pay respect to me.
I'm the,
You feel like the godfather.
In male,
like in the real world,
I don't think of myself
any more special than
the person I'm buying beer next to.
Oh, I was just talking to Andrea.
What do you mean?
You thought she'd know you, bro.
Well, no, no, no. I didn't think she knew knew me but i realized i approached her like i thought she knew me and then as i left i was like wait she might have no idea who i am but i so like i don't
think i'm any special but when it comes to melee i yes i do think everyone should be kissing kissing
my finger i I think I
brought this up the
first time you're on
but I just want to say
it again maybe I said
like the funniest thing
ever when we were in a
hotel room and Leah's
playing Falco and he
goes Leah you play
Falco of course you're
a mango fan no one who
plays Falco isn't a
mango fan she's like
yeah I thought about
like yeah there's not
anyone who would like
be like I love Falco
I hate the way mango
plays Falco
even like Ginger who I think is like your polar opposite in terms of like play style
you won and then you just talked about uh what was it main stage you just talked about how shit
you were playing and ginger was like i can't believe he's saying he's playing shit it was like
beautiful i love listening to ginger talk about mango oh it's my favorite thing yeah he said nicer
things and lauren has said about me in the last like i'm like i'm mango fan like i do the thing for him i'm like yeah i'm like i wish
everybody else talked like you you're coming to my event without getting paid i'm not coming okay
look this is this this is the there's no there's nothing else you got no one else panda's gone
vgbc's gone i'm all you got no cuz you
know what I'm getting mad about everyone's calling Ludwig the goat no
no one's like Ludwig's the goat I know I'm saying many people say this because
no no no money one of us has hard work talent determination grill and the other
one of us has amen and money yeah. Yeah. That's two big, big, big things.
Yes, but it undermines my goatness, and I don't like it.
You have a Falco.
I have an Amon.
His goatness is mad.
My money is your Fox, and my Amon is your Falco.
Okay, let me settle this.
I'm not going.
You're going.
I got you basketball tickets for your birthday.
As you should.
Kiss the...
I'm uninviting Gio
that's fine I'll take my son
and Joey
Joey does this thing where every time
he sees me he like
cause I did this smashing event
I forget which smash event
and he was at the booth across with Mango practicing.
He looked over and he said to Mango in private,
he's like, man, Ludwig's ass isn't all that.
No.
He whispered to me.
He's like, it really isn't that big.
That's not true.
And so then every time I see him now,
he starts poking my butt.
He starts giggling and runs away.
Yeah, feast my eyes on that boy.
He pokes it and runs.
And I can't tell if he's approving or disapproving, but it's... Look, want to go to your event not because i don't but zane's not going he's a great
reason i won't go and do it so it's fair but it's like what what am i going for for number one in
the world if you win i don't want to be number one because zane had a family issue and i don't
want to bring that narrative because i feel bad bad for him. Because he already has.
Half of Zayn's career is in Asterix.
Which I don't think is fair.
What if we all agree.
I know how good Zayn is.
What if we all agree.
I feel bad.
They will all agree that even if you win.
You won't be number one.
We all agree that you're ranking as an influence by the event.
But then if I lose.
I'm going to get dropped to like three or four.
No you're not.
You're solid number two.
I think so.
Who would take a.
Who could you lose to at this tournament?
Stats people are. No, no, no, no, no. They're anti-Mango. And I solid number two. I think so. Who could you lose to at this tournament? Stats people are anti-Mango.
They are.
Who could you lose to at this tournament that would move you?
Let's just say I got in ninth place.
I think the only reality is if...
No.
I don't think so.
Cody, your record against Cody is too good for him to be put above you, I think.
No, I agree.
The only person, I think the only situation is like where you get like 13th or 9th and
Amsa wins.
And then maybe?
Yeah, but that's already annoying to me.
Because I don't want to win because I don't want to step on Zane's shoes.
There's not going to be conditions for you.
I will win.
You're not going to win.
I will.
I know what you're doing.
It's not going to work.
How much money?
What?
How much money do you got?
What do you want?
100 subs, we call it right now.
That's it?
You're such a cheap date.
Jesus Christ.
You do it.
You make money.
Split it.
50-50.
No, I'm not 25.
The thing is...
Your event.
Yeah, I'm running it.
I don't make the money from the viewership.
It's not even about money.
I haven't been practicing.
I've been...
You know my birthday was...
Yes, you're not going to win.
So don't worry about it.
The Friday, Saturday, Sunday. And then today, I'm getting drunk again because you made me come here. I haven't been practicing. I've been, you know, my birthday was- Yes, you're not going to win. So don't worry about it. The Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
And then today I'm getting drunk again because you made me come here.
I'm missing out on melee rank.
Why do you think that coming here means you've got to get drunk?
Because I'm hungover.
You make you come here?
No, he has to heal.
The only way I can be a good podcast person is if I drink a few beers.
Yeah.
Otherwise I feel like shit.
He has to heal.
Do you want to dig into that?
This is business.
This is for you.
Do you want to dig into that?
I don't drink for me.
Yeah, we get expense to have beer, actually.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's on the books.
You think I drink for me.
I drink for the people watching this and for you. Look, I'll talk you, actually. You think I drink for me? I drink for the people
watching this and for you.
Talk to Wayne Shane. We can cook the books here, but
the fact of the matter is you're coming and you're not winning.
We don't cook the books.
The thing is, I don't even want to win.
You know what it's like to go to an event and I don't want to win?
Dude, okay.
That was Mainstage. You won.
It's not shameful
to win the event just because Zayn
had a thing
it's not like
you're spitting in his face
you're just competing
you're doing your job
no but it's gonna bring
in an annoying narrative
that I don't want to bring
to the table
I already saw the Redditors
they said even if Mango wins
he's still not number one
they were saying that
they said that weeks ago
they actually do say that
all the time
because they pulled up
your side by side stats
and they said even if Mango wins
he's not number one
and that's what they said
yeah but it'll bring
into the conversation and then I feel bad because Zayn did wins, he's not number one. And that's what they said. Yeah, but it'll bring in the conversation.
And then I feel bad because Zayn is an asterisk.
I'm not winning.
But I thought I wasn't winning main state.
And then I just won.
Because I'm that nasty right now.
You are pretty nasty.
I'm disgustingly nasty.
It's a good bracket.
I got a lucky bracket.
I said that in my interview.
We'll make it a bad bracket.
Let's cook the bracket.
Cook the bracket.
Cook the bracket. No, I'll cook it. I'm number lucky bracket. I said that in my interview. We'll make it a bad bracket. Let's cook the bracket. Cook the bracket. Cook the bracket.
No, I'll cook it.
Just let me cook.
You can't out-cook me.
We're cooking.
We're cooking that bracket.
What are you going to do?
We're making the eighth seed also.
You can't not go because if you back out, you fuck me.
You fuck him.
And you fucked him good and hard at the chessboard.
You got your charger.
It's the best person to fuck right now.
Look, at the end of the day, I'm going to be there.
Just know that I don't want to be there.
Fair.
I will bitch the absolute whole time, and I will bitch all week.
Hey, everybody who's watching, look at us.
We look cool.
Take it away, Nick.
Hey, so I don't have my prescription in now because I'm wearing cool Shady Rays,
but I'm going to try to think what I think I see.
Shady Rays. but I'm going to try to think what I think I see. Shady Rays.
They make them plastic.
You're thinking, are these the only colors and designs they come in?
There are so many more.
They got plenty more designs.
You know that barbecue sauce that's really good?
This is like that, but for sunglasses.
Sweet Shady Rays.
Or like the hot sandwich Howlin' Rays.
Yeah, it's going to be in the fridge for a long time and still be good.
I want my Shady bag, Shady bag.
And speaking of putting barbecue sauce on stuff, Shady Rays also provides 10 meals to fight hunger in America.
That's something Ludwig's familiar with.
I'm fighting away fucking nerds by looking cool as shit and getting all the baddies.
Here's the thing about me is I get these because they look good.
I don't give a shit about the people that it feeds.
What about kids?
Do you care about the kids that are starving?
I did not stutter.
Okay, he didn't stutter.
He doesn't care about them.
The kids are...
They don't have to worry about the stars,
but he doesn't care.
Let me defend myself.
There's a couple things that I do like,
and it's the 30-day exchange in return
and best protection program of any eye wearer.
He has that memorized. Shadyrays.com
the first edible sunglasses you will
ever eat. Go to Shadyrays.com
use code THEYARDY at 50%
off two or more pairs.
For as low as $54. Also
you can eat them with your mouth. Shouldn't eat them.
Hey Aiden. Should not eat them. I'm gonna
throw you my Shadyrays and you're gonna catch them on your
face. Yep. Okay you ready? Don't. I won't eat them though. Ready throw you my shady rays and you're gonna catch them on your face Okay you ready?
I won't eat them though
Cause that would be bad
Archie fix that in post
Archie fix that really easy
Archie make them look really cool
Shadyrays.com use code THEYARD
50% off 2 or more pairs for as low as $54
I never recognized
Cause I know that you like complaining
But I never recognized how much you love complaining Until this morning when you shot me that text and you're like ranked
melees out and i was like oh yeah and you're like and i gotta do this podcast and i was like damn
do you want to back out and you're like no you were like you were like two question marks yeah
yeah two question marks when you're talking to me like that. Yeah, Mango,
I feel like you,
you, like me,
are a hater for the love of the game.
And because you're a big enough dude that you're a hater that,
you know,
is sometimes justified.
And, uh,
but maybe not the complaining.
But I think,
I think you're justified in this.
I think I'm being totally justifiable.
But I do think you can...
My last two brain cells
like working together
to perform a thought.
You're putting a lot of pressure on yourself
that you're sliding Zayn,
and then it's like an asterisk,
when I think that if you just fucking...
If you ball out,
and you swag, and you get first,
like, that's just...
You're just still winning really hard melee.
And I think that's okay to be okay with.
You know what I mean?
Well, no, it's also because I haven't been practicing.
The thing about...
I'll go to the event,
but I feel... I don't been practicing. The thing about... I'll go to the event, but I feel...
I don't like showing up unprepared.
You're doing about fucking seven days.
From a try-hard perspective, it's like...
No.
I have like four days, and then I'm being drunk today.
You think I'm playing good melee today?
No.
And then we're going to the Laker game tomorrow.
You think I'm playing good melee tomorrow?
No.
That leaves me Wednesday hungover off a five-day bender
to get best in the world good in a four-day span.
I got the solution.
He's making good points.
I made great points.
We cancel the Lakers game.
He might even still win.
No.
Isn't that crazy?
We bring a melee setup to the Lakers game.
No, because I'm already...
I've mentally checked out this year.
And I think it's fair after the whole cancellation that I was like, I'm done.
I'm going to take December off. I'm going to enjoy my birthday
which I did. I had a great birthday. Your event
was okay.
Could have been better. We're not
going to go into it.
What? You said you had a list of problems.
Yeah, there were some complaints. I had a great time.
Now it's like I don't want to play Melee. I think it's because
the bar closed early. That was a bummer.
But it's like I just
bottom of my heart don't want to play. Are you doing the Woff event? No.. But it's like, I just, bottom of my heart,
don't want to play.
Are you doing a
Woff event?
No.
If that counts for,
I've already said,
if that counts for rankings,
I'm going commentary.
But you're going to
go over this?
Yeah.
Well, it's a sport.
Which is why I'm going
to your shitty event.
Because I have no choice.
Because being the goat is,
Us two goats,
us two goats of melee
if I could.
It has,
when you start a sentence
like that,
it's so funny. It just, I understand, like when I wake up, I know if I could you start a sentence like that it's so funny
I understand like when I wake up I know
what I have to do in my position
of my shoes you know
and so I'll go but it's like
I just don't want to you have to do fanfare to talk to the people
in the village you know you're the king
look I'll say it I'll say it
as the goat of melee
you are needy
but I think you are just because there are
other goats who are not as just because i don't even know if you know this but originally before
i was supposed to slapbox connor i was supposed to slapbox xqc but then he bailed last second so
i ended up just doing it with connor which i think worked out better anyway yeah he didn't show up to
do but you if you were in XQC
in the GOAT streamer, would have showed up.
I would have. But you would have bitched the entire
time. But I'd be there.
You ain't gonna slap me.
I'm gonna look bad. I got my beard.
I don't think I fucking slapped my Ludwig.
You don't have any beers here. The bar is closed.
I don't even want that. I just got
slapped by Ludwig today. It wasn't a good one.
It self-admitted too.
Yeah.
Well, I held back on all my slaps against Connor.
How bad?
What percentage power were you?
I don't know if I can find a percentage.
I think it's more so I was slapping with this as opposed to like your hand, which is a lot
meatier.
And this bends.
So I was like, I think it might've been pretty hard but this just isn't i hate
how much he loves connor again because if i was up there well i threw my hat in the ring connor's
your new carl jacobs he's like connor's way better and i'm like that makes sense but if i was up
there what if it would have ripped my fucking brains i love do you believe that yeah i think
you would have hit me as hard as you can you really believe that no you wouldn't have why
such an idiot why because we had a chance for that to happen offline, off the record, and I didn't.
Yeah, but this would be for content.
And you could put me down for good.
We've also slapped each other for content.
Yeah, but like.
So what the fuck?
Because it's a competition.
Oh my God.
It's literally a slap on to competition.
You just said it's because you're.
I'm saying that you would have slapped me real good.
No, I wouldn't have.
That's great.
Now I feel like, now I'm hurt. Imagine Slime was like hella good at chess randomly that'd be sick that would be so funny i
just dice your dumb ass you're you're hurt i'm hurt every day of my life i see how you feel
well you get it yeah i do because you know goats cry because every day i wake up i don't even want
to do half the shit i do but it it's just, I have to do it.
It's the best part of your day.
And I keep saying, best part of my day is when I get a sub.
I'm very happy.
He has a sub.
That's the most depressing shit I've ever heard in my life.
No, because my whole life is dictated by numbers.
If my stream's doing well, I'm happy.
And if I'm doing well in tournament, I'm happy.
When my stream's doing so-so, and I'm getting fifth and seventh, do you think I'm happy?
No.
No.
I'm very miserable.
I did see you at Big House. Actually, wow, that's so interesting.
Because it's also like the Eagles record.
Yeah, and the Eagles are hot.
So right now I'm riding the Lakers record.
The baddest high.
It's all numbers.
And that's all that matters.
My life is all numbers.
What about other joys?
Less objective joys.
The smile of a child.
I have no joy until I retire.
To me, it's like...
Touch of a lover.
I'm a...
I'm just...
The way I see it is I sacrifice my soul.
And then when I retire, I'm debt-free.
Let's talk about it.
You said you'd retire in four years.
Was that serious?
Yeah, I keep saying I'm not playing a day past 35.
You promise.
What's the... Why 35? Because then I'll be at 20 years. Was that serious? Yeah, I keep saying I'm not playing a day past 35. You promise. What's the...
Why 35?
Because then I'll be at 20 years.
Oh, okay, yeah, yeah.
And I feel like I've done...
What do I have to play for
any time?
I feel like I've accomplished
everything a Melee player
could ask.
You have to play for the people
that will still be like,
I don't know, Armada
if he came back.
Which is why I'm
lamenting that.
But I also,
in, you know,
anime fashion,
I feel like
I'll know when I can leave
when the community
doesn't need me.
And I feel like
they still need me.
But I think there will be a day
when I can leave.
We no longer need Mango.
That day is when
Melee dies
and Ultimate takes over.
This is just the end
of the Dark Knight.
Yeah.
But it's in the real life.
Have you heard that I'm Batman
and Melee community's
my Gotham?
Well, okay. What does Joey say about this?
What does Joey say about this?
He agrees.
Probably.
Probably.
It's the Melee Community, not my Gotham.
What does Joey's Falcon say about this?
Yeah, I can see your Gotham.
I put my everything away.
You're the most beloved top player.
Is Hbox a Joker?
Yeah, but I still get a lot of shit.
Is Armada the Joker?
Who's the Joker?
The Joker is...
Joker's too sick to be any of those clowns.
I'm Detective Gordon. The Joker clowns. I'm Detective Gordon.
The Joker's Nintendo.
I'm Detective Gordon.
And I'm working with Batman to save the city.
But in my own ways.
Can I be, can I be Gamble?
You can be Catwoman and fuck him.
I can be Catwoman.
But I also, I also like can defeat criminals.
Yeah, well.
And also we don't fuck.
We just have a thing. You really want to fuck him and he doesn't want to fuck you i'm just saying it's like a tension thing and that's one
way so no two ways i will now aiden ask you the day after he's announced his retirement can we
run the largest smash tournament ever million dollar prize pool and then keep them one more day
well no after i retire i what i'm gonna do is i'm probably just gonna answer super majors Smash tournament ever. Million dollar prize pool. And then keep them one more day.
Well, no.
After I retire,
what I'm going to do is I'm probably
just going to answer
super majors.
But like on no practice.
It's not even retired.
When I retire,
that means I'm done.
Like Isaiah in N64.
I'll just show up
and I'll be like
the celebrity guy.
I'll get 33rd.
Maybe once I get
top 8 in its height.
But I'm done
grinding at 35. Yeah, like how Ken was still going to Evo here and there. Yeah, I get top eight and it's hype, but I'm done grinding at 35.
Yeah.
Like how,
how Ken was still going to Evo here.
Would you play,
would you play spaces or would you like to fuck her out?
No.
So this is sad that I've already thought like when I retire,
you've really thought this through.
Yes.
This is my ending and I just,
I can't wait.
This is your off brand.
Yeah.
So I probably play Falcon or Mara for chic.
I haven't decided.
And I just want...
Because I've...
It's sad that even
after my career,
I just want to see
what a year
would look like
on another character.
I would love to see
your Falcon full-time.
The Mango Sheik.
Which is sad.
It's sad that even
in my retirement,
I'll probably still play.
You want the Sheik?
I want the...
I want the Mango Sheik.
I want the Marth.
I want the Marth.
Oh, the Mango Marth.
The Mango Marth has 3-0'd Armada.
I'll let you decide.
Really?
As my highest donor.
Okay.
When the day comes, you can pick my character.
All right, all right.
I'll wait, I'll wait.
I'm going to sit on it.
Think about it.
Yeah, I'm going to sit on it.
I'll sit on it.
Come back.
I'll play puff for you if you want.
Is puff open?
Yeah.
All right.
I'll do mango junior.
You all switched.
That was a good transition.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
All four of you switched.
I never switched. I would argue that I haven't switched. I's a good transition. Whoa, whoa, whoa. All four of you switched. I never switched.
I would argue that I haven't switched.
I had a little switch.
Slippy Ranked came out today.
None of you care.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
I've never cared.
None of you care.
I've never cared.
I haven't played Slippy in probably months because I have.
I don't know who my adapter is.
I play on LAN.
You guys don't even play Melee anymore?
I haven't played Melee in six fucking years.
I don't play Slippy
Yeah, I work
Yeah, Slippy Rank came out
But I fucking
I play
I have a Joshman at home
Take back
He's really good
I have a Joshman at home?
Yeah
Take back
I've never played Melee
You used to care
No, I just beat you once in Thanksgiving
But I never fucking played the game
You'll play Atrioc a lot
You used to care
Yeah, but I've never played Slippy
You'll play my
My Mars
Yeah, he was never Netplan
Remember when you used to do
Rank up Anthra's Ladder streams? Oh Yeah, I I've never played Slippy. You'll play my Mars? Yeah, he was never Netplan. Remember when you used to do rank-up Anther's Ladder streams?
Oh.
Yeah, I remember.
Oh, you played viewer fights on Anther's.
I remember I did that.
You did viewer shit on Anther's.
Yeah, I did viewer streams.
Battles.
Because I played you on one of those streams.
And you played-
I remember.
Yeah, he's fine.
Give him a break.
He didn't-
He literally actually didn't switch.
This is the go to melee?
Look at him.
He didn't switch.
And he be chillin's Mario. I'm Detective Gordon. He literally actually didn't switch. This is the go to melee. Look at him. He didn't switch. And he beat Chillin's Mario.
I'm Detective Gordon.
Beat Chillin's Mario.
I'm here to save the day.
Have you beat Chillin's Mario?
No, I'm just the funny thing to say.
It happened.
I beat his fox.
I beat Chillin's Falco.
Chillin's Mario.
I'll say it.
The double Chillin walkout kind of hype.
Yeah, it was extremely hype.
Yeah, that was perfect.
Anyway, what were your issues in my event?
Which one?
Smash boxing.
Besides Aiden being a clown.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's leave Aiden out.
Yeah, surprise him.
Just totally unworkable.
I actually had a great time.
Yeah.
Oh.
Aw.
Aw, take that.
I had an 11 out of 10 time.
I'll take that.
I started off.
Okay, so we get there.
Aiden makes me stand outside.
I'm wearing shorts and sandals and it was actually
pretty chilly so i'm staying there my toes you're always wearing shorts and sandals i know well i
only there was a way to check the weather it was funny because i before you leave your house no no
well i had joggers on but i had a jacket on yeah and my body can only have a substantial amount of
heat either down here or up here because i'm used to being like this or like a tank top.
Yeah. I had pants
on and I was like, I'm really hot. And then I took my
pants off. And then of course I had to stand
outside for 30 minutes. While walking you took your pants
off? No, at home before the weekend.
And then besides
that waiting and then we get there and I'm
hung over as shit. I have a heartburn.
And then I find out that our
seats aren't together.
Because he just gave us whatever.
Four tickets.
Yeah, so I didn't have four seats together anymore.
So I'm thinking like we can't go out there because I'm going to go and Joey and Gio are going to be away from me.
Like I was like, and then we get there and I have two beers and I go up for a third and
the lady's like, we're closed for now.
And I'm like, and then I go and I look for the food.
There's no food. Just like nasty carrots. So like the first like three hours were a zero out of ten time
and then and then it got there it all turns the bar opened up and i think that was brought they
brought tacos the clutch moment had some nice salsa someone else came up to me during in the
vip section when when those uh like when that meal was being served or like when the
veggies were being served and they're like how come like we paid to be in here and like there's
a concession stand out there but i have carrots in here i was like what do you want me to do about
this and i was like do you want me to tell you to like just eat the carrots and grow up and i'm just
trying to like get through was Was this like an influencer?
No, it was a person who had just bought the ticket.
And I just like didn't know where to go with the conversation.
Three people came up to me and they were like,
can you tell Ludwig that this food bar is not up to par?
And I was like, yeah, I'll let him know.
I, you know what?
I heard the feedback.
I heard the feedback.
It's a bunch of fucking greasy gamers who have never eaten a fucking vegetable in their life.
Well, hold up.
Those are our VIPs.
Those are our people.
But they did, they did come.
And the VIP section is like this ballroom area.
And it's connected to their seats that are like floor seating.
So the seats are good.
And it has an open bar.
And they had like a veggie tray.
But they were up in awe.
I've never seen it.
I walked in to just kiss some babies, shake some hands.
And I was like, hey,
thanks guys for coming.
Did my whole spiel.
And then I get down and then someone just
pies in the crowd.
They're like,
what's up with the mushrooms?
And then everyone goes, yeah.
And it's like a British parliament.
And I'm like, what do you mean?
And they're like,
go look at the mushrooms.
And I look and it looks like
someone just foraged,
like it looks like
a cauliflower but it's just mushroom heads all in one chunk that's kind of funny and i'm like
and i'm like what what's wrong with foraged food all of a sudden and then i leave and i'm like
they're kind of right it was in the slums with the vipers there was the slums of an open bar
the slums with the open bars that's funny funny. That's funny. You're funny.
And then, there was talks going table to table like,
Yeah, I thought the food would be better.
Like, everybody was mad.
Which I actually think, considering how much everybody paid,
is actually like a valid complaint.
But I will say, the tacos were amazing.
Yeah.
And then the fucking- the lady made pasta in front of me.
Dude, the pasta lady was great.
It was like an omelet bar
for pasta.
My whole day started
so shitty.
Even, I get there
and there's just like
mushrooms and like...
It just wasn't the veggies
the whole time.
Well, I was like...
No, it was just a start.
But then,
as the bar opened up
and the food came out,
I just like...
Well, you know the secret
to success in every event
is always end on a good note.
Doesn't matter if it starts shit
as long as it ends good.
Well, I was...
The whole day, I was like,
oh, you know,
the food's shit here,
but like it's venue food.
It's how it goes.
Yeah.
And like the day went on,
there's tacos now.
I'm like,
oh, food got a little better.
No, it got better throughout the day.
I wonder what they did.
I will say.
And then like the after party hit
where like none of the VIPs can go
and the food was amazing.
And I was like,
this is a little fucked up.
I know what their capabilities are now.
They got tacos.
They were cheffing up the fucking pasta in a little pan
They're making that they're slicing the meat off the fucking thing. I was like this is crazy dance floor after
Those two people go nuts for other people on there's two people on the dance floor the whole
They were killing it. It was his name is drew and I forget his wife's name
forget his wife's name.
But I talked to him for a while.
And they were killing it.
There was one point where he's pumping up the ground and she's like an inflatable balloon.
They were killing it.
They were so insane.
I know the after party was lame as fuck because the moment I walked
outside to walk
Cutie to her car, I saw like 30
influencers waiting for Ubers. I was like,
what's up guys?
Where are you going?
I was like, it's been five minutes like where are you going after party was great
and I was like
it's been five minutes
I'll defend the after party
we gotta go home
I think it was fine
it was just like
it was mixed vibes
because it was DJ
but then it was also
a ballroom with tables
and food
and so
there was a lot going on
I think it was perfect
for like
talking to people
that's what it was for
it was a talk to each other
it was good for the fighters
and if you want a party
right
go party if you want to just hang out hang out fighters. And if you want to party, go party.
If you want to just hang out, hang out.
That's why if you want to go to the dance floor or you want to go here or there.
It was like eight vibes and you could just pick what vibe you want.
I did like that.
It was like a vibe carnival.
And Nick Yingling was the vibe carny.
Yeah, he was.
He was.
With jagged teeth. Just toothless. Ben, one more for He was. With jagged teeth.
Just toothless.
Ben.
One more for the road.
How much time we got?
Hey.
Ten?
I imagine we got.
Something completely unrelated.
Yo.
Have you guys seen that Twitter scam?
Where like, someone will get their Twitter hacked, and then the person will post on the
account and be like, hey, I have ten MacBooks.
I thought that happened to E.
Yeah.
So they'll be like, I have ten MacBooks.
DM me if you want a MacBook
for 200 bucks
that's it
and they just try to scam
all their fans
so usually this happens to you
you complain to Twitter
they resolve it
in like a day or two
and you get your compact
Bobby Lee
the comedian
has had his Twitter hacked
for I think
two months now
I'm not exaggerating
his Twitter
his Twitter has been hacked
for like
two full months still now zipper zipper if you can pull up the picture i sent you uh this is
bobby lee's twitter account it tweets this every day and it locked it it locked the twitter oh my
god it locked the twitter it's so it's been so long it's been so long that the person is writing
that there's only two more left because they start with 10, right?
They just keep going.
And so they do this thing, right?
So can you pull up the full image zipper?
They now are trying to push signed napkins on the laptop and it just says Bobby Lee.
Dude, that is so fucking funny.
In plain writing.
What if this is Bobby Lee with a long con?
That's what I'm starting to think.
That's what I was thinking.
Is that they hacked him?
He realized how much money they made in the
DMs and he just kept it gone. Dude,
that's what you should do when you retire,
Mango, is your social just becomes like
a Ray-Bans thing.
It just becomes like a sunglasses
scam. Or you wait for
Twitter to lock you and then you say, what the fuck?
And you show that you're actually selling laptops
for cheap. I had
a lot of MacBooks.
Yeah, homie just doesn't give a fuck.
I'll hire you when I retire, Slime.
Yeah, I'll be your...
You can run whatever retirement manager.
Yeah, you do whatever you want.
It'll be good.
I'll let you go out on a good note online.
Imagine Mogul moves, but Ludwig's Mango.
Ludwig's Mango?
Better or worse?
If, wait, wait, if...
Ludwig is Mango.
So it's Mogul moves, Ludwig's out of the picture,
and Mango is in place
of Ludwig
so Mango
he's the streamer
content creator
he's our boss
we need responses from him
all that stays
but Ludwig's gone
it's just Mango
I thought you said
Mango's a content creator
like he doesn't stream
every day
no no but like
in the way that you are
he's not doing the YouTube push
I'm not a content creator
you are
fucking say it
say it with your chest
I'm gonna say it
if you were only the streamer
I'm a professional gamer
that he was
we would not all need
to have a job here.
Like, he doesn't need 15 employees.
We'd play a lot more Valorant.
You think so?
We'd be in a lot of
drug mango five stacks.
Yeah, we'd get the call
where it's like,
yeah, mango needs a fifth.
Oh my god, mango Valorant.
Dude, you know what would be
a sick content series?
You know how everyone goes
like iron to whatever?
Throw it at a hero? Iron to immortal.
But you have to have like a blood alcohol content level of.08 or higher to play.
And you gotta blow.
Yeah, you have to blow before every game.
Sounds like this is made for me.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
This is for you.
It's just Mango doing iron to immortal.
What?
Can I just not drink for like a month?
Look at your right hand.
You don't want to not drink for a month.
What are you talking about?
It just hurts.
He slurs Mackenzie, bro.
He's acting like his right hand.
He literally slurs Mackenzie.
Your right hand's like part of your body.
He can't do anything.
He doesn't want to party anymore.
It's not like...
Everyone's like, keep partying, slurms.
We need you.
He would have been a great fighter.
He what? He had the chops. He would have been a great fighter. He what?
He had the chops.
He would have been a great fighter.
Golden glove.
I'm trying to go on a 10 mile run.
How much do you weigh right now?
I'm not telling you.
I just recently gained 10 pounds.
I'm not happy about it.
North of two?
Yeah.
No, it's getting bad.
Two, 18.
No, not that much.
Come on, 204.
Easy.
Yeah.
Anyway.
Low two, low two.
Yeah, you couldn't box most smashers.
I would have lost weight.
You want to lose?
You know how easy it is for me to lose weight?
I just drink seltzers and I drop 15 pounds.
You think I'm joking?
You think I'm joking?
What do you mean?
You just sell alcohol seltzers?
Heart seltzers?
You'd be amazed by what you can do when you just don't drink any at all.
How does that make sense?
Dude, it's just calories in, calories out.
Seltzers have a lot of calories and sugar.
Seltzers?
No, that's their whole thing.
It's just sparkling water.
So you didn't listen to him.
He said Trulies.
Not seltzers.
Oh, so now you're dumb.
Wait, I am dumb.
No, seltzers are alcohol. I'm not a listener. Yeah, and alcohol has calories in it. There's seltzer're dumb. Wait, I am dumb. Seltzers are alcohol.
Yeah, and alcohol has calories in it.
There's seltzer and then there's hard seltzer, like seltzer water.
I assume when Megan says it, he means like, no, I'm not with him.
I recognize that he means alcohol.
During the pandemic.
The plandemic.
I don't know why I said that.
It's a real thing.
Plus one on Elon's tweet saying my pronouns.
During, I stopped drinking beer
because I was like,
I'm going to be drinking every day
because obviously what the fuck else
are we going to do?
So I was like, I switched to Stelters.
I lost 15 pounds in a month.
But there, nothing changed in my diet.
I was eating fast food every night.
No, but this is like fattening.
What? I don't, I don't get it. Maybe you drink less because they're like, there's more alcohol in them. No, was eating fast food every night. No, but this is like fattening. What? I don't get it.
Maybe you drink less because there's
more alcohol in them? No, I drink more seltzer.
Does it add up?
It just doesn't. The math isn't there.
It could do the math.
This is a very solvable...
Seltzers are way lighter than this. How long would it
take you to be able to run 10 miles again?
You give me a month. No
fucking way. 10 miles is really long. Let's put a yard bounty on this. No, but 10 miles again you give me a month no fucking way yes 10 miles is
really let's put a yard bounty on this no no 10 miles you could do the question is how long do
you have to do it within because you could run 10 miles right like you can just get 10 miles done i
mean it's like a non-stop if you if you have to maintain a certain jog the whole time i think
it's better to just have it within a time frame. Like, I think 10 miles in two hours.
Like, ever?
You know my body's peak?
12 minutes a mile?
It's a little fast.
Maybe 150 minutes?
12 minutes a mile?
What?
A 10-minute mile.
12 minutes a mile
is pretty light.
I think that's light.
10 minutes a mile?
I was saying 12 minutes
per mile.
10 miles.
You don't know my body's peak?
What's your peak?
What's your fastest mile ever?
Fastest mile is like high five.
Like high 50.
I'm a 550.
55.
Yeah, I'm like there.
But like on average in like school, I was always like 610, 620.
And then I ran two miles as fast as I could just to see.
And I got like 1130 or something.
That's juicy.
What's that test called?
There's a test in America
they do where you run
two miles.
They have something test.
The two mile run.
The president test.
The pacer test.
Is that it?
The pacer test is like
a lot of different running.
But it's a little different.
The timed two mile run.
It's two miles
under 13 minutes.
Are you doing chest boxing
again next year?
I don't know.
I'll start working out today.
I think I should do it again
because I think a lot of people
didn't want to give chest boxing a chance and then saw it and thought it was cool today. I think I should do it again because I think a lot of people didn't want to give chess boxing a chance
and then saw it and thought it was cool.
So I think everyone who watched it
will want to watch it
and I think everyone who missed out on it
in faux mode will want to see it.
So I think...
And we'll also run it way better.
I think it's worth running again
but there's a couple things
that I would change.
You know what you need?
What?
You need an Aiden.
I need an Aiden?
What if you had your own Aiden? He needs an Aiden. I have thought about that. You get yourself an Aiden. That's what you need? You need an Aiden. What if you had your own Aiden?
I have thought about that. You get yourself an Aiden.
That's what I told him.
I have an Aiden.
You have an Aiden? Not I have an Aiden.
You have Aiden. I was my own Aiden.
Back when it was me and Ludwig, I was
yingling, I was Aiden. Hire Eamon.
Eamon? Yeah.
My mom pokes me about it sometimes. Really?
I'm your brother. you can help him out
to be fair
I think my brother would never
ask or respect you
it's like how my brother
bought the merch I'm like Ethan I'll send you
the merch
he's too humble
but would he do like stuff
uh yeah
do you think your
brother's lazy
no
he has Aiden's
blood running through
think about how
good he got in
Fortnite dude
that's true
Eamon and Eamon
that's a duo
if I ever seen one
he has to be the
ice climbers of
mogul movies
what is it in the
discord
Corwin's Revenge
Corwin's Revenge
yeah I think I'll
do it again
do you think we
should do it again
yeah I thought about that a lot yesterday I think there's there's so much to improve on just from
the first one it'd be so much better yeah there's certain types of events that you do once because
the spectacle of them happening that one time at all is like all of the magic of it and then
there's certain types of events that like as they happen and bring in a bunch of people that think it's cool
and like realize it's cool you capitalize that and pull them all back in again i feel like even
me is like i think this falls into the second category right from like my even me like when
i was watching i was like damn i kind of wish i did this i was like this is really cool but i
think even more content creators would be like yeah it's kind of cool i think just just the fact
that there was this monumental thing that just got the word out about chess,
because the number one question leading up to this event
when it was discussed was, what is chess boxing?
And now this has answered the question, and it's cool.
So it's like now...
I think we also pull more star power for the next one.
Yeah, exactly.
I think more people want to do it.
Because I think everyone's concern was like,
what happens if I get punched a bunch?
And then you realize it's not that bad, because I think everyone who fought yesterday like what happens if I like get punched a bunch and then you realize it's not that bad because I think
everyone who fires a lot I respect everybody who fought yeah just to go out
there and like maybe get your ass beat as like any kind of like con like never
I hear the end of it and like I've spent everybody who flies like you know one
got like shit and they're like Lamar because they fought it's like right to
me you know my mom always told me growing up if I ever
heard you backed out of a fight,
don't come home.
That's crazy. And then she said if you ever lose a fight,
don't come home. Okay, that was meaner though.
That's crazy. You did grow up in the hood.
What the fuck?
To me, it's like if you fight, you have my respect.
It doesn't matter.
That's such a bad...
Because that means you can't back out of like but also if you lose you gotta win
You have to wait you got a really big
Lost a fight every day of my life cuz I only fought so you never told your mom your kids
Did it again, I grew up in the night. I always, check up the Norwalk stats from when I grew up.
Oh, the fight?
The fight sheet?
No, no, no.
The death is great.
The penalty.
Yeah, all the crimes and shit.
There was a point growing up
where we could not go outside
in the daytime
because people were getting shot
because they were wearing
Raiders jerseys.
Because they were Raiders fans?
Because they liked the jerseys.
They had a jersey.
Some gang shit.
That is tough.
If I wanted to play
baseball I can't
because
people are dying
two houses away
that was the other
Golden Glove Marquez
God bless his soul
he would have been
packed the other day
yeah I think the only
thing I'm concerned about
is how to one up it
like outside of just
we have bigger stars
outside of Dorian in the end
we have Ryan fucking Gosling
yeah he gets some star power.
I think specifically, like, I think that slap boxing finale was cool, and so I think every
event I've done that's live has had some sort of aspect of, like, here's a surprise extra
delivery so that you guaranteed have a good time coming out because it exceeded expectations.
And I've never repeated an event, so I don't know how to- because, like, I can't do that
again.
I'm not going to surprise the audience again.
Well, no, you just surprise them with two other people. And then it's Ryan Gosling in event. So I don't know how to, cause like, I can't do that again. I'm not going to surprise the audience again. Well, no, you just surprise them with two other people. And then Russian Ryan Gosling and live slime. I mean, that would be actually
good. Wait, what was his Russian Russian live live at the end? It's like, okay, you guys
real gun. Yeah. Cause that's something to lose. You don't get to come home when you
lose that. No, I watched the movie bullet train. It's really shit, but there's this
one like bullet train. Nah. Cause everyone I heard of liked it. It. No. I watched the movie Bullet Train. It's really shit, but there's this one You didn't like Bullet Train? Nah.
Everyone I heard of liked it. It was great.
I didn't like it. I haven't seen it.
I guess I should have recognized this, but I just
didn't like how it was all on the train. I didn't like the set.
The bottle episode?
Yeah. You didn't like the two brothers, dude?
No, I liked the characters.
But the one part that I thought was cool is how they went
the bad guy, he would have this
revolver. He would rush and roulette himself and then kill the person right after
that's tight he left it up to destiny there's a writer that did that as well i always think about
that wait what do you mean uh there was this writer who was really really depressed and
they got to the point where they wanted to just play russian roulette and give it a whirl
one bullet uh and then it didn't kill them and so they were like
so for two weeks later they were just like so happy like the air tasted better they had like
everything was better and then they got depressed again and then they ran it six more times so they
actually beat the odds i think about it all the time he never died uh he never died as far as i
know right now uh he wrote a short story called Depth Charge. It was really, really good.
But I think about it a lot.
Terrifying.
Yeah.
Sometimes.
Yo, extra content.
We've been thinking about this
for a while.
Not really good content, I think.
Why is it not good content?
People would watch.
Is that a real question?
Susan will clear that.
Yeah, I don't think she will.
Susan will be fine.
We barely get cleared.
No.
What do you mean no?
Hey, check this out.
Do you think the algorithm
will catch this?
Okay.
What are you doing?
Dummy bear?
Whoop. Oh, hey. All right. Hey think the algorithm will catch this? Okay. You dummy bear?
Hey, algorithm, what is this?
It's going to be way less funny when we get demultified.
What if I suck it?
Do you imagine that I'm like,
Hey, step right up.
I'm Nick Yingling.
Here's my carnival game.
I switched.
Come to the suck and fuck booth
at the mogul carnival. I'm going switched. Come to the suck and fuck booth at the mogul carnival.
I'm going to the
Nick Engling
suck and fuck booth.
I gotta see what's
going on there.
I didn't guess
I have to know.
You little tiny
little belly.
Oh,
Zipper gives us
a thumbs up.
All right.
Well,
we're at our
we're at the end
of our beautiful journey.
Oh, wait.
Let me tell my
my drinking story. All right. So when you started the first of our beautiful journey. Oh, wait. Let me tell my drinking story.
Please.
Let's do this.
When you started the first 10 minutes.
Yeah, yeah.
We interrupted.
We actually went on a roller coaster.
We ended up at the Nick Engling suck and fuck station.
That's what we all do at some point.
It always kind of stops there eventually.
So I was 15, 16, and I just never wanted to drink.
I was like, I don't want to be that person
and then you know at pound three i had just turned 16 and you know selling wolf
yeah baby yeah my one of my favorite people of all time in the male community screen fox ever do it
yep and uh he's like hey we should get drunk because you know we're all drunk everyone's
underage like you know how it used to be back in the day. Dude, and him and... Dude, him... Him and... So problematic, but...
Well, I think...
It was a different time.
That's all I'll say.
Different time, but also,
most people were underage.
No, everybody was underage.
That's like a big difference.
It was like the community wasn't like...
It wasn't a bunch of 35-year-olds
hanging out with 16-year-olds.
It was back when...
Everybody was...
What about when you hung out with H-Roc?
Anyway, continue.
Yes, sir.
True shit.
Got you drunk, didn't you?
He was like, you should drink. And I was like, I don't want to. He's like, okay. So I didn't drink it, but I turned it down. he was like you should drink and I was like
I don't want to okay so I didn't drink it but I turned it down I was like no
and then I was a 17 and then I went to the East Coast and they were like we
should drink and I was like fuck it I'm like on the East Coast like I you know
funny enough hacks money was one of the first people I ever got drunk with. This is your first time on the East Coast.
Oh, these don't add.
This is bad.
Because Hacks had to be 14.
Hacks was like 12.
Hacks had to be 13 or 14, bro.
He was asking you to drink?
Yeah, everyone was drinking.
But, I mean, we had like some shots.
And then I...
After that day, I just...
A part of me...
Dude, you didn't drink until you were 17 years old?
Yeah.
That's crazy.
Is that your first time East Coast? I used to go these goes all the time
and they would always drink and I'd be like I'm good like and then I was like
Yeah, fuck it. So I took like three shots and like a fucking beer and I was like this is the greatest thing
I knew the Popeye arms
Realize what you could be so then I like time went on I was like I'm only gonna drink on the East Coast and then
It went to I'm gonna drink on the weekends and then it was like i'm only gonna and then eventually
well here we are so when you said you let your son drink at 17 that's because that's when you
started drinking you were you were raising your son how you were raised i think kids are gonna
drink no matter what sure like as you tried but that guy actually taught you a life lesson when
he took your 20 yeah i don't think shit changed. Like, when I was in high school, it was the same way.
People drink.
We're talking about this.
It's like kids, underage drinking is at, like, an all-time low.
And, like, kids, like, don't really, I think the only thing that's up with kids is, like, pot use.
But, like, recreational drug use in general.
Do busy on their phones.
Yeah, actually.
You know what I'm saying?
Amen.
Watching Ludwig. Amen. I'm healing. Well, I just, for me, it's what I'm saying? Amen. Watching Ludwig.
Amen.
I'm healing.
Well, I just,
for me, it's like,
I can't wait
until I have a beer
with my son.
To me, that's like,
it's gonna be a good day.
It's a watershed moment.
Yeah, no,
it's gonna be a great day.
You can be there.
Me?
Can I?
You can come.
I would love to be there.
To JoJo's first beer party.
It's about like
two years from now.
Like, it's doing a shower.
He's eight.
All right.
I'm going to wrap up the stream and drink with a 16 year old today.
Make a lesson for 20 bucks and then ghost them for tradition.
Don't you?
You do get to do that, right?
Isn't that most places in the U S if you're a parent and you're at home,
you can give your child permission.
You're 17 year old. My mom used to to buy me out my friends to play video games
Wow, just play like Kirby Air Ride and smash and shoot by us like a 12-pack. How old are you like 17 18?
16 17 it was like junior in senior high school
So I'm 16 I'm always said like like just I don't care what you do. Just tell me before you do it
Yeah, exactly. And I was like, because they know you're going to do it.
And then we'd run out though and we'd go to Mrs. B's closet and we'd just raid it because
she had hard alcohol.
But we wanted to keep the levels the same.
So we would just fucking fill it with water to go back and dilute it.
So it'd be like vodka water, like the more and more.
You're worse than me.
Yeah.
This actually just reminded me of one time.
I remember I was 17 and I go to my mom peak drinking age yeah it's actually the best because
well i'm not gonna go into it but so i go to my mom like mom can i have can i have five dollars
and she was like yes and then she gives it to me she's like don't fucking spend this on alcohol i
swear to god i said mom i swear on everything i'm not gonna spend it on alcohol. I swear to God. I said, Mom, I swear on everything. I'm not gonna spend it on alcohol.
I went and got two 40s.
How'd you get them?
It was the hood.
There was always an older homie.
Oh, so you asked them and they would get it for you?
Yeah. So it's like the same thing happened to me, but they were chill with you.
That's why I had this.
We live like a block away from the store.
I see. So it's just like, get the old homie.
And you've known him or something? Yeah.
And where we're from, you want alcohol. And you buy them like a bag of hot cheetos and they were cool it's like here you go man there's this boonies
kind of vacation place in washington called ocean shores and it's like a beach town that uh has
basically like not it's very few people live there it's like pretty rural out in the middle of
nowhere and then you know you might go there to like check out the beach because there's all the beaches in
washington are like very rocky but this one's like nice and sandy and i went there with my friends
we were like 17 i think and that was also one of the first ways that i got alcohol was we stood out
in like a shitty 24 7 mart parking lot until a guy just agreed to buy us alcohol and it was
the same kind of like looked like mid
40s like bigger guy came
out of his truck and we were like would you be down to buy
us booze and
he was like no he goes into the
store walks back out
and he's like actually yeah I'll do it and
then did it for us no charge
just gave us just gave us like three
bottles that's kind of more evil.
Yeah, that's like he wants kids to get drunk.
Wait, they'll have a life of misery.
It went back out.
Would you buy alcohol if somebody asked you to?
Nah.
You wouldn't?
Fuck no.
I wouldn't do it either.
But I also have the added, I think, twist.
I might do it if I was on holiday.
If you weren't on holiday.
Yeah, yeah, no, I agree.
How old do they look?
Huh?
How old do they look?
The younger, the funnier.
If they're 10, I buy them a 30 rack.
I buy them a bunch of kid beer.
And I'm like, get going.
Let's see what you guys got.
Come on, no, drink it in front of me.
Drink it in front of me, kids.
Chug it, pussy.
It'll be, yeah, it'll be like making a shot.
I'll prep it for you.
It's like smoking a carton.
Like, they'll never want to drink again.
Yeah.
Alcohol, no, but lotto it for you. It's like smoking a carton. Like they'll never want to drink again. Yeah.
No,
but lotto tickets.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's that weird age between like 18 and 20 where it's like,
you should just be able to do this. Yeah.
If you're like 19,
that's why I don't know if I'm willing to stick my neck out for like some
kid coming up to me in a parking lot.
But at the same time,
it's like, this is kind of bullshit that you can't buy would you get your brother a handle a handle?
Yeah, if you want to handle course you
He's done it
Different you just yeah, we're gonna save a Jojo which part you know me and Jojo. Oh
I asked him if he knew you
And he said no Which part? You're going to say something about me and Jojo. Oh! I asked him if he knew you. And?
He said no.
All right, what?
I thought it was going to be fucking cool.
But he said...
Thanks for watching The Yard.
He said, I heard you talk about him.
He sounds like an okay guy.
Thanks, Jojo.
There you have it.
Jojo approves somewhat of Ludwig.
Thanks for coming on, Mango.
That's a big approval.
And you ran an all-right event.
We have to bring you on fucking, what, one more time?
Because we can't throw out the panda one.
I know Crank Gameplay's...
Hey, come win the Ludwig event.
We'll give you fucking...
Win the Ludwig event.
We'll get you.
Come on.
Come on, this weekend.
I'll be there.
I don't want to.
Woo-hoo.
All right, well, you guys can see Mango in a couple days
when this drops at the Ludwig tournament.
When does this drop?
On Thursday.
Thursday on video. Wednesday on
audio. Go watch Mango live right
now playing Smash Ranks.
My channel is live right now.
It better be. It won't be.
This goes as of noon.
One more thing. Do you want number one?
Do you care about number one on the rank ladder?
Of course you do. On the rank ladder?
Yeah.
Enough? Yeah, but also like, it's hard to like be a streamer and want number one. do on the rank letter yeah enough yeah but
also like it's hard to
like be a streamer and
want number one I get
you I gotta find the
middle ground I'll just
be like top five and
I'll be happy you'll be
like Tarek yeah
shoots for number one
never hits it I gotta
find a Tarek story next
time yeah true all
right all right
everybody goodbye
have a nice day or
don't see you in the
primo