This Paranormal Life - #044 Tarrare: The Man Who Ate Everything
Episode Date: January 16, 2018This week we #investigate Tarrare, a man whose insatiable hunger meant he had to eat nonstop to survive. Rats, snakes, puppies, nothing was safe from his jaws of death. But why exactly was he driven t...o do these things? Time for Rory and Kit to investigate.Support us on Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife to get access to weekly bonus episodes!Buy Official TPL Merch! - thisparanormallife.com/storeFollow us on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTubeJoin our Secret Society Facebook CommunityIntro music by www.purple-planet.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Is ice actually a precious diamond that melts in our hands?
Is the world round, flat, square, or a dodecahedron?
All of these answers, you can shit.
All of these questions, you can find the answer to
right here on This Paranormal Life!
Welcome to the podcast.
My name is Rory Powers.
What day is it today, folks?
It's a Tuesday, and we are back.
It's the most fun day of all.
We are back with a brand new paranormal tale coming straight out of our bunker.
We attach a USB thumb drive to the leg of a pigeon and shove it up a chimney pipe, essentially,
and just hope to God someone's out there listening to this right
now where is the bunker wouldn't you like to know ladies and gentlemen all i'm saying is whenever
the big red button gets pressed we'll be the only two podcasters left alive and we're really hoping
that day's coming quick because we are dropping in the ranks. Reviews are negative. And last week, Kit got dosed.
I could really live without family members and friends
if I was top of the iTunes charts.
I think I'd be okay with that as well.
Honestly.
Yeah, yeah.
So last week, if you may remember,
I went on record and said,
whatever case I was going to investigate this week,
I would 100% claim is true.
I'm glad you brought this up so I don't have to bust your balls too much about it.
No, I'm...
Because you're going to make good on this, right?
I'm throwing my own balls on the train tracks.
Please don't.
I'm doing this myself.
Not a turn of phrase.
I'm going to stand by that statement.
A hundred percent.
A thousand percent.
Okay, I'm excited.
Today we're going to be investigating a man named Terreur.
Terreur.
Terreur.
Okay.
He's a French man.
First name, medium.
Holy shit.
That's fucking genius, dude.
Oh yes, dude, you're on board.
That was amazing.
Did you make that up yourself?
Honestly, i might have
googled before like i knew the topic was terraria so i might have googled terraria okay okay i'll
give you that one though i'll give you that one um just don't interrupt me again just don't do that
it's a good pun it's a good pun and i want this to be open to you know people chiming in and out
but don't talk when i'm talking and let me do the point the goddamn show don't point i'll point the knife where the knife goes it's very much a dowsing rod
of death and it's pointing right at you right now so be careful okay he's a french man who was born
in 1772 and he is known to be one of the strangest men in recorded history. Now, this story was actually an email suggestion by someone named Henry Galley.
Oh, a listener submission, if you will.
Yeah, he sent us an email to thisparanormallifepodcast at gmail.com
with his submission, which you can do as well.
And he wrote in the email,
Myself and my girlfriend are huge fans of the show.
We tune in every week. Thank you, Henry
and your gal. They said they've listened
to all the episodes multiple times.
Holy crap. You guys are great.
The pigeon's doing something, right? He's
going somewhere. That's good.
We wanted to suggest the topic of
Terre, an incredibly weird
and creepy French guy from a few
hundred years ago who has a bunch
of bizarre supernatural theories
about him okay well henry and your girlfriend congratulations this paranormal life are on the
case let's get started that was a great submission all right let's hear it let's go back to the
beginning as i said 1772 date unknown Why did you bring it up then?
I didn't need a date.
Location?
France.
Also on...
No, that is known.
You do know that bit.
Just France.
Weather?
It's a pretty big country.
Oh, Jesus.
Humidity?
98%.
So you do know the weather.
Yeah, the humidity.
One night in rural France, a woman went into labor.
That woman gave birth to a very special baby.
A baby that would grow to be known as Tarrere.
So was that his birth name?
We don't know what his name was.
He referred to himself as terraria okay um but we there's no record of because we don't know the actual date of his birth or his name just the year
okay i'm sensing doubts already please just withhold those for the meantime this is very
much a biblical birth okay right moving on growing up to rare was known for his big appetite you know he's a grown kid all grown kids need
nourishment yeah like what doesn't baby normally eat mashed up bananas uh booby milk um definitely
yeah those little jars a little bit like little like mushy things
like to make baby food you just cook a meal and smash it up yeah and put it in a little jar
that's i think that's basically it but terraria's case was a little bit different
all right by his teenage years he could essentially his own weight in beef every day.
That doesn't make it...
All right, so let's just stop the podcast before it even begins.
What part of that makes sense?
What part of it doesn't?
He's a growing boy.
Is he growing exponentially every day?
How many limbs does he have after every meal?
Could he touch the moon by age three months?
He was just a growing...
He's a hungry guy.
He's a hungry dude.
Loves beef.
And it wasn't long before...
It just got to the point where his family couldn't feed him anymore.
Because it was just too expensive.
So I guess they were
quite a strict family because they just forced him out really out of the home they're like
you're killing us what age is he now like six months i don't understand no he was uh teenage
years oh okay teenage years so they raised him they raised him up uh calf at a time you think
you would feel if you were feeding your baby
that much
you would be pissed
if he didn't turn out to be
the greatest quarterback
to ever live.
If he just turned out to be
a normal French kid
we'd be like
this is a f***ing joke.
We fed you like 50 cows.
Fred and Sally down the road
they fed their kid normal shit
and he grew up to be
bigger
and more successful.
Our kid sits in and plays video games all day.
I mean, you're a bad parent if you think that the amount of beef you feed a child is relative to how successful they're going to be in later years.
He financially ruined his family.
Just because he ate a freaking munchies.
So, Tarrere spent some time wandering France.
Alright, he's just a cool French kid now, out on the loose.
Taking down the government one cow at a time.
Jesus.
He got mixed up with thieves, prostitutes.
What?
Anything to satisfy his constant hunger.
Is he eating them?
No, no, no.
He's just working with them to i guess make
money for food jesus for cows this is like like you know in like the blade movies you're having
so many problems with things that i didn't think were going to be problems there is so much the
fundamental premise of this story is outrageous remember in like the vampire movies and like
they're kind of nervous the humans are kind of nervous to have a vampire on like Blade was half vampire because he might flip out and eat them.
Yeah.
You would be way more worried if you were hanging out with Tarrere.
You'd be like at any moment he might just eat me whole.
Just cows.
He's like he's a hungry man, but he's not mad.
He just eats a lot.
He just eats a cow a day or a quarter of a cow a day.
But I'm just wondering what happens if he doesn't get his cow.
After a number of years of slumming on the streets.
Okay.
Tarrer had a lucky break.
All right.
He managed to get a job as a warm up act for a charlatan.
For a charlatan.
So not a circus.
Not a circus.
No, literally just a single charlatan? So not a circus. Not a circus, no. Literally just a single charlatan.
Okay.
So, uh, Tarrar's job for this dude, or gal, was, uh, to try and draw a crowd of people.
You know, so that when the charlatan comes, he can do his thing to a big group of people.
Okay.
So what does Tarrar do?
He would eat objects, like wine corks, stones, or even live animals.
For sure, though.
Live animals?
To get people's attention.
Like how big are we talking?
Are we talking a little spider?
Are we talking cod?
I think at this point, mice, snakes, rats, little things like that, live, are still grim.
Okay, really grim.
People even witnessed him eating an entire basket of apples one after another, like some
sort of monster.
What kind of monster eats a basket of apples?
It's pretty tame.
Like a Disney villain, I guess.
Yeah.
This gig was good.
The pay was decent and all he had to do was eat shit, which was Tarrere's like favorite
thing to do anyway. Yeah. was to rare's like favorite thing to
do anyway yeah uh but he started thinking all right with his brain all that food is powering
something and that's his big old french noodle i'm the one drawing in these crowds they're all
here to see me eat corks and stones why am i working for the charlatan i could do my own thing
you know i could be the terraria the wandering
gobble man or something that's a terrible you know if you don't like that name don't take it
um but if you do would you like that does that sound if i was to pitch that you think that would
be my name no like a name for terraria the gobble man oh is it so so terraria who has lived and died
already you're you want to give him a name? I'm sorry, I'm making a movie.
I'm doing a Kickstarter.
I'm finding my documentary on Terer called The Gobble Man.
And I just want to just float that idea by you.
Do you think that's a strong brand?
No.
The Gobble brand?
No.
No?
Don't call it that.
I've already started Gobble Productions, so.
Really?
It's going to look a bit weird if Gobble Productions makes something else.
Is that why you're in a pristine suit?
Where did this suit come from have you been
backed a Gobble Productions
high-end crew jacket
this was six grand
the Kickstarter is
actually just to recoup the six grand so
I can now get the business off the ground
I need six thousand pounds
or as I call them Gobble Dollars
to get my god damn money back
this is you in a thousand pounds or as I call them gobble dollars to get my goddamn money back.
This is you in a 20th Century Fox office. This is my TED talk for sure.
Bill Gates who was supposed to speak is tied up in the back.
You're giving a speech on gobble productions.
Can you imagine the whole like it, it's the nice TED Talk?
And now, please welcome to the stage,
head of Microsoft, Bill Gates.
I just run out, grab the mic.
Listen up, fuckers.
I'm gonna need all y'all to log on to Gobble.com.
Give me some coins. Security are shooting you with tranquilizer darts at this point
You're getting woozy but you're not giving up
I'm not giving up
I'll say bit
Light
They're beating you in the face
And ripple
Hit the ground
Standing O
Bill Gates comes out
Let him speak
That was the best elevator pitch I've ever seen Bill Gates comes out. Let him speak.
That was the best elevator pitch I've ever seen.
So at 17 years of age, he moves to Paris to work as a street performer.
Independent.
He's his own man now.
Torreira was older, but with age comes more hunger.
So what age is he at this point?
17.
Not really older.
Okay.
He was eating a mental amount of food a day.
Okay, go on. Not even food, sometimes just anything he could.
One day during a street performance in Paris, the act went wrong and he was afflicted with
intestinal obstruction.
Of course. The crowd, terrified obviously, carried was afflicted with intestinal obstruction. Of course.
The crowd, terrified obviously, carried him all the way to a hospital.
Shocked but not surprised.
Once he got to the hospital, the doctor gave him powerful laxatives to essentially shit out what he had eaten.
For sure.
It worked.
Tarrer was fine.
And then he allegedly joked to the doctor he would eat his watch and chain to prove to him that the act was fine. And then he allegedly joked to the doctor he would eat his watch and chain
to prove to him that the act was safe.
The doctor declined.
He's like, I just saw you shit out a bunch of things.
I don't really fancy my watch in that pile.
So I know what you're thinking, alright.
You don't.
We've got this guy.
He's now 18 years old, eats rocks, beef, live animals.
What the f*** does he look like?
Yeah, go on.
Well, despite all of this weirdness,
Tarrere was described as being pretty slim.
I thought you were going to show me a photo, but I'm...
No, I have no photo.
Okay.
So he's pretty slim.
Pretty slim.
But just because he's slim does not mean that he is not weird
yeah so apparently i mean obviously his mouth was abnormally wide okay uh-huh like his jaw
was he looked like oh he could do that snake shit where he like he disconnected his jaw yeah he
looked like a titan uh His teeth were heavily stained.
Of course, from all the rat eating.
And when he had nothing to eat, the hunger would set in,
and his skin would apparently hang so loosely off his body,
he could wrap his abdomen around his waist.
I have a lot to process here.
Right.
He was essentially like a deflated balloon, I guess, when he didn't eat.
You know when you see those people who was like i was 500 pounds and now i'm not yes but they still have like this the excess skin of a 500 pound man right i think that's essentially
what's going on here with this man so that's quite interesting because in retrospect we might like to
think that he was somehow a fraud because these claims do not seem possible.
Right.
Maybe he was doing that trick where you stand in 2D perspective and toss the food behind your mouth.
Of course.
But the fact that he could stretch his stomach skin around his body, yeah, indicates there's something not right like the more you
read in this story you'll i think you'll grow to realize that this special ability he has
is much more of a curse than some sort of gift because essentially like if you could do this
like oh i can need anything that's kind of cool but being able to eat anything and being hungry 24 7 are two very
different things yeah his cheeks were wrinkled and loose because obviously when they were stretched
out he could allegedly hold style 12 eggs or apples in his mouth eggs or apples like apples
are bigger than eggs slightly slightly fine 12 eggs 11 apples thank you terair being hungry sounds
pretty bad obviously but when he had eaten kit when he had eaten i'm sorry what's he was burning
hot to touch and absolutely at all time stank i'm sure people said People said it was so bad that
you couldn't stand within
20 paces of him. Oh my god.
Well, he was eating vermin.
I'm sure if he was shopping at the Whole Foods
he would have been fine. He would have been fine, yeah.
But he was eating rocks and trash.
His eyes would go bloodshot.
Oh, Jesus. And people
would even sometimes describe a visible vapor emitting from his body.
Like in the cartoons, the stink lines.
There was literal stink lines.
He suffered from chronic diarrhea, which was described as, quote unquote, foul beyond conception.
Oh, no.
That's not something you want your doctor to tell you,
that to be on your medical record.
Right.
It's like, what does it say, doc?
It can't say anything because there are no words
in the dictionary to describe.
Not only is it beyond words,
it is beyond belief and understanding.
I couldn't even tell you either
because you ate the clipboard you ate the pen the doctor at this point is just loading a 12 gauge
i need to see you in the yard but aside from all of this all of these weird defects all these weird
signs the stink the chronic diarrhea he had absolutely no signs at all of mental illness or unusual behavior
okay just a hungry shitty man he wasn't even a little bit sad i don't well i mean yeah probably
sad i'd be sad this is how you know he really stinks is because in 1772 everyone stank Right Everyone smelled of shit It was bad There was no like
Nice deodorants
And like
Lush bath bombs
People
Absolutely not
You got a bath
Once a lifetime
Maybe twice
The first one is when you're born
And the doctor just
Dunks you in a basket
Second one
Baptism
Do you know what these people wanted for Christmas?
Lynx Africa.
They were the only generation that actually wanted Lynx Africa.
A Lynx bath set.
Lynx Africa was more precious than any spice.
Kings would greet other kings with Lynx Africa.
With Chargel.
And Old Spice, if you were lucky.
So years go by, and Tarrer is still in Paris.
He's performing, eating, shitting.
But little did we know that around him in France, a revolution was growing.
Please don't tell me he has any part to play in the French Revolution.
Please don't go there.
You shall further address him as General Tarrer.
No! The great General Tarrer. revolution please don't go there you shall further address him as general terraria the great general terraria aka napoleon terraria um when the war the first coalition began
terraria of all people decided to serve his country and join the french revolutionary army he's he's the worst he's the worst superhero in
the world like in like i feel like roy you know comic books better than i do right in the comic
books doesn't like i mean captain america he fights in the war right multiple and i mean if
it takes someone like the flash if he fought in the war he eats a lot the flash has to eat lots of times a day
metabolism is very quick yeah but he also gets supersonic speed right and presumably smells
quite fine absolutely fine i think he was quite handsome and liked actually yeah you know he'd
like do a mission really quick and he'd be like oh yeah he'd crack a joke and beat my record time
yeah yeah yeah and all the nazis would be like yeah they'd be like crawling on the ground
like beaten up yeah yeah he'd be like oh you guys want to see me kill hitler and they'd be like yeah
and he'd be standing there and say you want to see me do it again they'd be like oh we love you flash
exactly hard cut terraria eating the rations of a hundred men men starving on the battlefield and he he is probably weaker less trained right
and and less like than every other cadet i i don't know if they were in a position to necessarily
turn down recruits um but as you pointed out uh there were immediate complications
the rations given to soldiers were nowhere near enough to satisfy his uncontrollable hunger to the point
where he had to start doing favors for other soldiers in return for a share of their rations
as well jesus because i like it was caught it's common in let's say the the world wars to keep
uh soldiers happy keep them sustained with less food. They would give them free cigarettes. That's like a cheap way.
Like, he would just eat hundreds of cigarettes.
Like, there's no, that wouldn't help his hunger at all.
Even worse.
You'd be like, all right, private, welcome to the front line.
You know, you reek of shit.
But I tell all the privates that, you know?
Like a little rise in the air.
It's like, all right, here's your helmet and your boots colonel towns around for one second now it's gonna be dirty out
there and i where's your boots private uh he's i don't know what terraria sounds like
what boots you gave me no boots sorry private anyway Private. Anyway, as I was saying, here's your boots.
General looks down.
He's naked at this point.
Where's my pants?
Where'd my uniform go?
You weren't wearing pants, General.
Ah.
All right, then.
As I said.
Ghosts stroke his beard.
Where's my hand?
That's been an affliction since birth, General.
Was it?
Another Private leans over.
I don't think he should be leading us.
I'm imagining like Tarrer is kind of like Kirby.
In that instance, he would just absorb the general and become him.
Yeah, yeah.
And then he's got the hat.
Like that's how he works up in the ranks.
Yeah.
He would eat his rations.
He would eat other soldiers' rations.
On top of this, he was known to just scavenge battlefields.
Oh, Jesus.
And dung heaps for just anything he could eat.
Oh, my God.
I mean, it sounds like he's doing very little, actually, to advance the cause.
Because presumably while this hunt is going on,
I mean, around him is just the most hacksaw-rage battle scene
you've ever seen in your life.
It's straight up saving Private Ryan out there,
and he's just looking for chicken goujons
in the middle of a battlefield.
As we said, all of this food, it just still wasn't enough.
Tarrer was exhausted.
He was tired.
He had to be admitted to a nearby military hospital
suffering from extreme
exhaustion. Oh no!
Someone get him
a car, he's fat. I know!
They rushed him to hospital
where they supplied him with
quadruple rations. Whoa.
In an attempt to get him back on his feet.
But it wasn't enough. No!
What's happening?
He had to scavenge for scraps
in the garbage and gutters of the hospital.
Jesus.
He used to eat food left over by other patients.
And even if he could,
go to other parts of the hospital
and just eat medicine.
Oh my God.
He just had to put,
like people who are training
to like bulk up and stuff,
like carb load. He was just like matter loading. Like people who are training to like bulk up and stuff. Right.
Like carb load.
He was just like matter loading.
Right.
At that point he's just eating whatever's lying around.
Like some like space deity would do.
Just consume like galaxies until he's just all encompassing.
Exactly.
So enter a man named Baron Percy.
Now he's a surgeon in chief of the hospital that Terer was staying in.
Percy wanted to see
this is a terrible idea. Percy wanted to
see just how much Terer
could eat. I mean
you've got the wrong person immediately
to do this experiment. So he
prepared a meal for 15 people
and presented it to Terer.
He ate all of it.
He ate the whole meal. Wow.
Which consisted of two large meat pies
plates of grease and salt yeah that's not a meal for anyone let alone 15 people i think it's like
the ingredients to make a meal for people uh and four gallons of milk okay but isn't that a thing
like humans just can't if you isn't like the gallon challenge yeah if you try and drink a
liter two liters of milk you'll just boke everywhere yeah that's quite true but i guess
with the milk thing like this son of a bitch eats cows yeah there's a lot of milk in those bad boy
that's where it comes from you're eating a goddamn milk factory yes i think i can't do the gallon challenge? What's this? Bitch, I had an udder for breakfast.
He eats a udder first.
Live.
So he eats it.
He eats the entire meal and then immediately falls asleep.
What?
So rude.
On another occasion.
This is, Tarrer, this isn't cool, man.
As a lover of these animals not okay terraria was presented
with a live cat he tore open the cat's abdomen oh my god uh drank its blood you said he wasn't mad
you looked at me and you said he wasn't mad now read back what you just, he tore open its abdomen of a live cat. Drank its blood and ate the entire cat aside from its bones.
This is mad.
Before vomiting up its fur and skin.
Put him down.
No more exams.
No more.
That's when you send him somewhere.
I think he might be the plant from Little Shop of Horrors.
Freed McCorville following this again why did they continue this the hospital's staff offered to rare a variety
of other animals including snakes lizards and puppies where were they getting these from i know
i bad hospital absolutely bad hospital don't give
your man puppies to eat imagining as you say guys with like limbs blown off like medicine
penicillin wait wait wait we're gonna see if this guy can eat three puppies at once oh do you have
any penicillin for the wounds oh Sorry, puppy eater ate the whole cupboard.
So you guys are gone.
And he's just sitting there chilling.
Hey, they didn't think I could do it, but I did it.
Two puppies, two puppies.
Corville's chanting, two puppies, two puppies.
I'll be honest with you boys.
I think they're just waiting for you guys to die and see if I can do you next.
Apparently he even swallowed an entire eel without chewing.
He just crushed its head with his teeth and then ate the whole thing.
All right.
I mean, nothing surprises me at this point.
So what do you do with this guy?
All right, he does-
Put him down.
He does kind of have a superpower.
You can't say it's not a superhuman ability.
I guess.
After a while, they wanted to throw Tarrere back into active duty.
Really?
Again, I don't...
They're as mad as he is at this point.
But not as a regular soldier, Kit.
As an experiment, a secret document was placed inside of a wooden box,
which was then given to Terer to eat
two days later he shitted
out and the message was completely
intact
so what do you think
huh
okay so they used him as a drug mule
type thing
essentially yeah so Corville proposed
to the
generals that to rare be used as essentially a courier for top secret files someone who could
eat military documents sneak him into dangerous places and blast him out his ass untouched
unscathed i mean apart from the shit that covers them but sure and because the experiment worked
no joke to rare was hired as a spy for the
oh jesus here we go but although so this is the problem the generals know that he can physically
do it but obviously they're worried about his mental health the guy who drank a kitten's blood
yeah and crushed neil's head i don't know if he can be trusted with state secrets. Yeah, exactly. Weird.
He goes to the opposing side.
He's like, will you guys give me more food?
Because I'm up for hire.
We will give you three cows.
You'll get your message.
He shits out a box.
Immediately.
On the spot.
Deal.
Shitty hands, like, raised out oh christ that's how they that's how they did like a solid
like legal deal back in the day yeah they wiped their ass with their hands and shook hands you
know how it's like you know you have like the uh the spit promises yeah like promise you know
and then you got like blood swears, cut your hand and then grab them.
Shit bonds are like the most unbreakable pact among brothers.
It's like a cosmic, eternal, universal bond recognized by God and the angels all at one.
Exactly.
I always thought that with like the cutting one.
We'll do this blood bond and, you know, whoever breaks it, you know, oh, there'll be
some bad punishments. He's like, to make
the bond, I had to
cut my f***ing hand open. I probably
got hep C at this point. Yeah, we all shared the
blade. Bad logic.
I'm sticking to shit. Good
old clean shit.
It's sterile, don't you know?
No, it's not shit. It's sterile.
So they decided to test him first.
Alright, so they told Tarrere that he had to eat and deliver a top secret message to an imprisoned French colonel.
But in reality, the note was just asking whether or not the message was delivered.
Because you don't want to give him something important on his first day, you know?
Fair.
You don't even know if he's going to have the stamina to make it over the trench.
It's true.
So, Tarrere disguised himself as a German peasant and snuck behind enemy lines.
Good start.
Nice.
Using the old noodle.
He doesn't speak any German.
So, immediately, people grew suspicious and reported him to the authorities.
Of course.
I mean, even if the man can't
speak german he his belly's hanging by his ankles he reeks of shit yeah giant grin and stained teeth
should have been a sign yeah i love he crosses the border it's like what have you seen something
suspicious well there's a guy that showed up and he's telling everyone if they give him food, he'll shit out a secret.
He's a bad person, really.
He was captured immediately and whipped and tortured.
Really?
Yeah.
By the Germans?
And forced to explain what his mission was.
Okay.
It took a while, but eventually Tarrer explained to them that he'd eaten a box with a top secret message inside that he had to deliver to an imprisoned ally.
After 30 hours inside his body, Tarrer shit out the box.
Him getting interrogated, they're like, what are you saying?
This is ridiculous.
And he's like, let me eat the gun.
What?
Oh, my God.
But also, could you imagine finally, like, this guy's holding off on his own.
And he's like, I'll never tell you.
I'll never tell you.
You finally crack him.
And he's like, fine, I'll tell you.
I ate a box.
Jesus, this isn't what, like, you keep torturing him.
That sounds like not the truth.
Until this, he shits it out.
So these guys are all like, holy crap, he was telling the truth.
He's just shit out top secret military information from the enemies.
Obviously, they are furious because they discover it's a dummy message.
Which actually kind of sucks.
That must really suck for Tarrera as well because, like,'s a dummy message. Which actually kind of sucks. That must really suck for Tererra as well
because you're tied up.
I assume you've shit yourself.
You've been whipped, beaten, tortured.
You finally crack after all of this pressure.
You shit out the box.
And it turns out you weren't protecting anything.
The dudes you were trying to be cool for
didn't even trust you he's starting
to think he shouldn't have ever joined the army whenever you're shitting yourself tied to a post
getting whipped but terrible terrible combo yeah it's like you thought the worst thing that could
happen is you get shot and killed no no getting flogged and you're
shitting yourself it's pretty bad pretty up so what he's essentially doing is like this sounds
magic you somehow shit out a note that says your friends don't like you
that's the ultimate shame you've somehow shit out a message that's as if someone
laid a turd that spelt out we don't believe in you like yeah like getting i don't know being
like horribly ill with like indigestion and all sorts for multiple days and at the end of it all
you shit out a fortune cookie that tells you you're
gonna die this is just horrible insult to injury i thought the worst bit was the the sickness and
the shitting so they were angry like to the point allegedly, they were about to execute him. Wow. Like, just kill him.
But his captors, they just beat him up and released him.
Like, back on the French lines.
It didn't feel that bad for him, I guess. No.
Okay.
That's a bad military career.
Yeah.
What's, like, what's the opposite of the Medal of Honor?
Oh, yeah.
The sash of shame.
Yeah.
I don't, whatever that is, that's what he would have got.
Dishonorable discharge.
Yeah.
That kind of works because it's shit as well.
Yes.
It was the most dishonorable discharge.
Diarrhea, the most dishonorable discharge of all.
That's really funny.
Well, after that whole ordeal, there is is no way terair wants to go back into
military service you return to hospital and this is kind of sad he basically said to percy
the surgeon who like was doing some of the experiments at the start basically said like
i've had enough of this like anything you can do to try and cure me and make me normal i'll try it which
again like this is the point where i'm i said you'd reach where you're like you realize this
is more of an affliction rather than like a gift or he just wants to be able to eat a baguette
like normal french people and be satisfied uh so percy the doctor surgeon guy i think he think he
felt a bit bad for him uh and he tried a number of horrible things to fix him
he gave him tobacco pills
I guess to try and make him
his stomach upset
wine vinegar, drinking that
medicine back then was so shitty
it was, wasn't it
maybe smoke a cigarette and if it doesn't go away
come back to me
and then try the wine vinegar
he would eat huge quantities of soft boiled eggs that doesn't go away, come back to me. And then try the wine vinegar. He would eat huge quantities of soft-boiled eggs.
That doesn't sound like a solution.
That's not going to improve the smell situation, no.
But no matter what they gave him,
it was never enough to suppress his hunger.
It's getting really bad at this point.
Tarrere would often sneak out of the hospital
to eat food from bins,
scavenge for any food he could find
giant human raccoon
and was allegedly
even found trying to eat
the bodies in the mortuary
no!
it's that joke you made earlier, it's true
he's trying to eat his homies
it's gotten that bad
by this point, I mean the doctors fully believed
that he was mentally ill yeah i mean
no fucking duh yeah maybe when he drank the cat's blood yeah or day one who has to go to a military
hospital because they're too hungry yeah that's a sign yeah that's a flag on the place in a book
somewhere that's mental illness 101 they all wanted to transfer him to essentially like an asylum where
he could get some help imagine if he'd started with this some people just not laughing at him
and being like go get him some help somewhere you know it would be also very frustrating though to
be like like i'll do anything doc and he's like struggling so much he's eating these dead bodies
and they're like we think your problem is psychological fast forward and he's like on a psychiatrist chair he's like tell me about your childhood he's like
i'm so hungry
like was your father around much as a child he's just eating the stuffing on the sofa
yeah that would be really frustrating but this is something that i find a
little bit sketchy and really not cool percy percy essentially insisted on keeping him in the military
hospital okay because he wanted to do more tests okay and more weird things with him which even
when all the doctors are saying you got to get him to a safe place he's not he's not all right in the old
noggin then one night a 14 month old baby went missing from the hospital shut your mouth no one
could find any trace of the child the doctors nurses all furious obviously immediately suspect
terair wow no way and no one's gonna defend him because if
if that's gone missing and it's obviously not like an administrative error or something like
that built in the hospital who's the one guy eating cats and dogs that's a pretty large
administrative error that there was a baby born or not right that's like it's not like a box you tick by accident i don't really
know what goes into uh being a nurse but i assume it's a little more than just like a form like
checking out was the baby born yeah yeah i assume more than that maybe a little bit no one in the
hospital will defend him not even percy which is shitty percy the whole staff basically rallied up
and chased Tarrer out of the hospital
and onto the streets,
hoping that they would never see
the strange man ever again.
But just like a wooden box
being swallowed into the darkness,
it will eventually pop out your butthole.
What goes up must come down
and what goes in to rare
must come out four years later a doctor phoned percy and told him that an old patient of his
wanted to speak to him the man went by the name terair whoa terair was sick and weak. Oh no. Which he believed was because he ate a golden fork.
A golden fork?
At one point.
And he thought it was still lodged inside him.
Okay.
Not the babies or the dead people, actually.
Or just like eels, live eels.
But a fork.
But a fork.
Okay.
Maybe he ate it.
And maybe everything passes out of him, but the fork didn't.
So from the description of the pain that was given to Percy, he felt like he was actually
tuberculosis.
Really?
Not actually a fork lodged inside him.
He's probably just describing the symptoms of that.
Jesus.
A month later, Terer had extreme diarrhea and died.
What?
You're just going to end it like that?
This is bullshit.
But to this day,
his legend lives on.
This is the shittiest ending of all time.
I mean, that's fitting, right?
The shittiest ending of all time.
Bravo.
And that is what they call dishonorable discharge oh the bass from steinfeld
why the did i not call the movie dishonorable discharge i called it the gobbler man this is me halfway through the ted talk shit
bill gates pulled out as soon as he heard the alternate title
dozens of bankers on wall street are like buying low and selling high on dishonorable discharge.com
so you're just gonna end the story like that? Yeah.
He just got diarrhea and died?
What did you expect was going to happen?
He was going to rise up and, like, overcome it?
No, he ate himself and shit himself to death. And what age was he?
Old.
Really?
Well, no, probably not, because he left the military hospital.
Yeah.
And, what, he must have been, like like mid-20s or something by that point.
Four years later, allegedly, the phone call was made to Percy.
So maybe like late 20s, if even late 20s, 30.
That's playing life on hard mode.
Yeah.
Maybe even hardcore mode.
Imagine I started with, he ate a cork and suffocated.
Imagine I started with, he ate a cork and suffocated the thing that's literally designed to block things from moving up a tube.
He decided to eat it.
Yeah, that's a pretty big f*** you all, right?
Yeah.
That's true.
It was a bit abrupt, but I mean, I'd be fabricating the story if i built it up anymore yeah i guess god damn so what are your thoughts kit i have a little more talking about you know
some theories about why he was away but i want to know just in general like how are you feeling
about this my immediate thoughts are a this is mad right b y right right and c hi all fair all fair um i mean is this is this stuff
like public record is this the legend of terraria or is this like pretty solid documented history
so it was kind of tough because a lot of the stuff obviously with his early life just run around the streets and stuff i mean that's probably a mix of both legend and myth you know jazzed up a
bit to make it more exciting but i mean there's medical records like all of the the stuff is
logged yeah there was a person called to rare and there was a dr percy yeah yeah like these people are real but but it's as i said maybe
there's exaggeration exaggeration sorry within uh within the story yeah i'm gonna go ahead and
assume there is i just don't know to what degree okay yeah pretty fascinating what do you think of
it it's one of those things that you just assume aren't real. It can't be real.
Yeah.
But, you know, it's a big world out there.
And especially in today's world, with the little gift of YouTube,
it's so easy to see videos, even like of people competing in like the Guinness Book of World Records.
Yes.
It's like, here's a man who put 1500 clothes pins on his dick and it's
like what that's not right you know that a human being cannot do that the extremes of human
performance it's it's incredible like some people or some people uh much like terraria can fit like
a you know a hot plate in their mouth you know dislocate their jaw and just you know do the most insane things there is a guy in the guinness world book of records that has balanced a mini
cooper car on his head no there isn't how how is that the same species as me right i can probably do 10 pull-ups right so like as i said the the cause of terraria's
behavior isn't really known um but one of the theories behind it's one of the popular theories
with obviously like scientists now looking back at the it as like a case study um something called Something called hyperthyroidism. Okay. It induces an extreme appetite, profuse sweating, and heat intolerance.
Certainly, I don't know if you guys have ever seen photos of like the rock on cheat day
or like a daily meal plan of like Michael Phelps Olympic swimmer.
Yeah.
That's pretty crazy yeah when people
set their minds to it they can eat a lot of food a lot of food like like enough food that in the
1700s it could become legend that's true yeah with a little bit of exaggeration because i'm assuming
food was pretty scarce at the time yeah so yeah maybe like him eating a meal per 15 was like a turkey leg and some rice
grain you know like there wasn't a lot to go around yes everyone's like good god he's a beast
he just ate that little bear that's a gummy bear christ he had dinner and supper
where does it all go now those are all pretty logical explanations.
Okay.
Which, if what we were saying on this podcast is,
is the legend of Tarrere true?
I would come down and say,
I believe that within this story, there is realism.
I would say, I think that there was a man called Tarrere.
This is a big back battle from this top of the podcast. I would say that there was a man called Tarrere. This is a big back battle from this top of the podcast.
I would say that there was a man named Tarrere who could eat a lot of food,
and he died shitting really horribly.
He had a tough time, you know?
I could say that's true.
That's real.
That was a guess for me.
I'll say that he lives today.
He's that real.
I start eating the mic.
He lives today.
He's that real.
I start eating the mic.
But as we know, me admitting that doesn't mean it's paranormal.
So I've got another theory for you.
All right?
Let's go.
We've obviously been in, you know, it's like a bit of a history lesson.
Dates, times, locations, names.
So just stick with me here.
This is going to be a bucket of cold water right in your face here.
Okay.
What do you know about demons?
A lot, actually.
Go on.
There is a demon named Ale.
And I'm not trying to say, like, booze is the devil.
But it's a demon named Ale.
Okay.
And Ale are some of the few demons.
That's a bad start.
That's weird grammar.
Yeah.
Are some of the few demons. I feel like I'm in a dream.
Ale are some of the demons.
Ale is a name for a collection of demons.
A type of demons, I think.
That were known for having a huge appetite.
And even said to have liked eating children.
Ooh, okay.
Just like Tarrer was accused of doing after he returned for his military service.
Now, these ale also apparently can be persuaded to doing good deeds.
Even help you.
apparently can be persuaded to doing good deeds even help you much like terair was persuaded to aid the cause and eat a little box and carry it in his stomach he wasn't necessarily good or bad
that's interesting the ale are also allegedly afraid of eagles hence hence Terare consuming so many eggs to ensure
the future would be bird-free.
Okay, it's a stretch.
Is that your idea? That sounds like a Rory
original. No, that's, I mean, that's straight
from the heart of the
paranormal files.
What they look like changes with each
account. Some say they look
like ravens,
others like clouds, or dark winds but none of them
to rare but many say snakes like the snakes to rare used to eat or female dragons this is weak
i have nothing extremely weak so i i did say last week that no matter what i was gonna give a yes
on this podcast i can't believe this is the story you brought okay because of that
i'm gonna say on this podcast with my name on the line that terair is a demon
which makes it a paranormal story.
It makes it a yes from me.
What is it from you, Kit?
I think everyone at home is very confused about the trajectory of this particular episode.
I'm a no.
I feel like I lost you with the demon bit.
Because it was a lot of well-structured sentences and then we some string along poorly
worded bad grammar lines about demons we kind of i think we spent i mean around 50 minutes
going through a factual right literal history of a living man in 1700s France.
And then I feel like there was some stapled on nouns.
You talked about birds, snakes, and dragons being demons.
I will admit, after researching the case intimately,
to tie it all together, I did have to Google hungry demons.
But my mind was blown when i found out about the ale so no obviously no one's to rare in human form i'll give it to you that no one's made this connection
before which is pretty cool breaking ground is what you're saying it's also false as shit
and i'm not gonna go down with this out of the box i would like to take this you know who else
was out of the box steve jobs where the number
one paranormal investigator he died of cancer did he are you sure it wasn't hyperthyroidism
i'm sure oh okay shit that was really how i was gonna tie this thing together so i can't say
enough i'm a no right so that's a no
against one yes
so it balances out
ooh
I guess we're gonna have to
agree to disagree on this one
we're just gonna have to
come back next week
to investigate this
topic again
the ales
the legend of the ales
it's been a while
since we've had a yes
on this podcast
so I'm glad
I could finally
give the people
what they want
I just want to establish
that there was not a yes.
There was a hung jury
and we came to no such conclusion.
If you liked that story,
thank you so much for tuning in.
That was a fun one.
I like doing fun ones.
The paranormal world can be quite serious at some point.
It can.
It's nice to throw in this older uh this kind of like this older one this
funny one and again thank you so much to uh henry and you and your girlfriend for sending in your
submission thank you so much henry we mentioned the email address you can do it as well if you
want even more content you know weekly shows aren't enough for you you're hungry like terraria
yeah that's what i'm saying damn banter uh what you can do is uh if you're interested if you subscribe
to the this paranormal life patreon you will get a bonus episode uh every month which is something
that we're really excited about bringing you guys and just to give you guys a little taste
for what that would be like check out this little preview right now i think all of us from time to
time have those dreams that seem very real.
Yes.
I think I brought it up once in the podcast before.
I once dreamt that the world was ending.
The apocalypse.
And the old apocalypse dream.
And that was extremely disturbing to me in a way that most dreams are not.
Right.
Most dreams do not really have that much impact on my life.
Where most people float down the stairs
to safety you made it um seven steps deep before seeing the horizon light up in a blaze of fiery
destruction yeah satan call my name middle name and all you wished at that point you couldn't fly
because you're scrambling midair ass naked to get away
from the devil himself quite right um where he then grabbed you and dragged you down to the
depths of hell and i at that point i usually look up to heaven assuming that if the devil's real
god's real i look up and i see jesus and his daddy flipping me off honest to god and they're actually
retracting a ladder upwards a golden ladder everyone
everyone they wanted up there has already gone but occasionally they will lower the ladder just
to get my hopes up and i'll reach out yeah um every time i try and grab it lift it a little bit
further up again and the devil sees the disappointment face and slaps my ass to disconcert me even more.
Yeah.
What a distracting thing.
I feel like the latter thing is bad enough.
But also every couple seconds, the devil just slaps your ass. And his claws are red hot.
Do not get it.
What a weird little thing for him to do as well.
Do not get it twisted. Because it's not even him to do as well. Do not get it. Twist it.
Because it's not even that mean.
He knows it's disconcerting.
He knows it's very distracting.
So I hope you enjoyed that little preview of one of the bonus episodes of This Paranormal Life,
which you can find on our Patreon.
And speaking of the Patreon.
Oh.
We got some special shout outs to give because.
Hell yeah! If you give two dollars, a minimum of two dollars, to the Patreon,
you earn yourself an official shoutout by Rory and Kit,
the most professional and highly regarded paranormal investigators
in this world and the world of the demons.
Not Heaven. Heaven is top tier. We can't even get in.
Yeah, you gotta go to some other Patreon for that shit.
And before we read out these people's names, you know this, Kit.
I've been in a lot of wars.
So we've learned.
I've fought with a lot of people.
You don't show it.
So I'm just saying I may or may not have been in the war with some of these fine ladies and gentlemen.
And their names may or may not trigger massive PTSD.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We'll see.
Okay.
We'll see.
We'll roll the dice and see what happens.
Thank you very, very much indeed to Vian Ronquillo.
Ronquillo.
I'm not going to kill you because we weren't in the war together.
I've never even heard of you before.
But thanks for subscribing to the Patreon.
Thank you to Story Simpson.
Story Simpson.
You've told a story today, Mr. Simpson.
And that's that I love you.
Short and succinct.
Sam Ross.
Sam Ross.
We did fight together in a couple of the wars.
Iraq for a start.
Thank you to Jack English.
Jack English.
In English, I will say,
Arigato.
Gozaimasu.
Gozaimasu.
Sunny Plant.
Sunny Plant, you just made my goddamn day.
You are the sun on my plant, which is my smile.
You make my smile grow, Sunny, is what I'm trying to say here.
Joshua Apter.
You've made an app, Joshua.
And that app is press this button and Rory smiles.
Miles Kuiper calls.
Miles, you coward.
You rat.
You army scoundrel.
When I flip sides to the nazis and then back he was the first one to
rat me out you decorated war card i was dishonorably discharged and he was honorably charged with being Jonathan Muir got me off guard
thank you so much Jonathan
I'm not even going to try and say your second name
I might have f***ed it up I'm sorry
thank you to Harry McGee
gee whiz
cheers for that Harry
I'll take the lot
have a good day love and also you shouldn't have
writing me out to the general yeah when i flip sides you little army rat
i hope these people don't leave brenton owen brenton owen i got a lot of respect for brenton
because uh he defected with me in world war two which war world war two a lot of respect for Brenton because he defected with me in World War II. Which war?
World War II.
A lot of it was in the second one.
I mean, I guess I'm not surprised
if you've been in that many wars
that you might have got
some of them mixed up together.
Thank you to Jamie Choi Prasset.
That is a goddamn cool name.
And my name is Rory McFistblast Powers.
Excuse.
Thank you, Chatan.
Chatan, you know, people been talking, people been Chatan,
saying that you're a bad guy.
I don't believe them.
I think they're lying, and you're actually pretty freaking great.
Thank you to Jack McClellan.
Jack, attack.
He's coming at you fast.
He's coming at you quick.
That's Jack, uh he's actually
really slow i sang that song to cheer him up but um he's a good kid stay in school jack jack the
slug we called him uh michael daily michael i hope that you're checking for the podcast updates daily because we make them for you.
You ready for this?
No.
Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A, start.
You got 30 lives.
Isn't that the Contra code, right?
Yeah.
Okay, cool.
Thanks.
I don't know how to say that.
I fought with you in Contra, I guess.
Yeah.
Thank you so much.
Lastly, not leastly, mostly, with them, hostly, but always ghostly.
Kenny Lamb.
Kenny Lamb.
Body of a lamb.
Heart of a lion.
Neck of a shark.
And feet of a Bigfoot.
He's a good man.
He's a great soldier.
And he's
he's a father I always wanted.
I'll tell you that much.
Lamb.
I could have done with this
Patreon support in my childhood, Kenny.
So, thank you so much again
to all of the names we've shouted out
so far in the podcast.
We will continue shouting out
names on next week's podcast.
And until then... Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah is your episode you you you uh lead us on right i can't believe you're
gonna take that from me here sorry go right uh to all the listeners out there oh wow this is done
get out of here you paid for it you got it go off