This Paranormal Life - #070 The Bloodthirsty Donkey Lady that's Haunting Texas

Episode Date: July 17, 2018

When an innocent woman and her beloved donkey are thrown off a bridge to their death, their spirits are intertwined, forming the horrific cryptid known as... The Donkey LadySupport us on Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife to get access to weekly bonus episodes!Buy Official TPL Merch! - thisparanormallife.com/storeFollow us on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTubeJoin our Secret Society Facebook CommunityIntro music by www.purple-planet.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Did Sir Isaac Newton discover gravity or invent it? If the ancient pharaohs were so smart, why are they all dead? All these questions you can find the answer to on This Paranormal Life. Welcome, our humble followers, to the podcast. We are here with you right now on episode 70. Wow. This is the 70th episode of This Paranormal Life. I never thought I would live this long, to be honest.

I know, right? Come back week after week just spiting the truth like a broken faucet. Any of these episodes, I'm waiting for a full-on SWAT team to kick down my door and cuff my weak little wrists together and say, you're under arrest for being too badass. And it's not for lack of trolls trying. have tried to swat us on the daily but the the authorities know that we're we're basically harmless and they won't even bother they know a part of it is our fault we stream on twitch 24 7 uh with the title i dare you to swat us and uh you know it's becoming more of

like a courtesy thing now the gang show up and we're like steve chris it's you to swat us and uh you know it's becoming more of like a courtesy thing now the gang show up and we're like steve chris it's like another swat call yeah i know he's like you know i have to pistol whip you of course of course that's fine and of course you know i'm not taking down the stream well you know rory i would expect nothing less From a man as badass as yourself. Gives me a medal. Oh wait, I think all this happened after I got pistol whipped. I think it was a hallucination. That was a hallucination, okay. I call them whippy dreams.

The good times after I've been pistol whipped in the back of the neck. Welcome to the podcast. Hopefully you've listened before, or that might have been a little bit weird. But on this podcast, what we do is we take a brand new case, beast, story every week that exists within the paranormal world. And we will investigate it in an episode. And at the end, as professional paranormal investigators, we'll come to a conclusion as to whether or not it is true. I'm joined by my co-host, Kit Greer. Awoo-ga!

My name is Roy Powers, and I hope you're ready to investigate a terrifying cryptid. Wow, we're back with another cryptid. We're back with another cryptid. We took a little detour off the cryptid, you know, straight and narrow for a while, but we're right back on there. Exactly, and this one comes courtesy of josh miller thank you josh emailed into this paranormal life podcast at gmail.com and requested did we investigate this this this paranormal ass the pistol whippings do affect the

vocabulary do affect the memory recall so i'll actually make a lot of sense in a second. Let's dive right in. Please. We begin our journey back in the 1950s in San Antonio. Where's that? Texas? Yes, I believe so. It is, yes, you're right, Texas. Where there was a woman who we're going to call Margaret. Okay.

Now Margaret was a mother who enjoyed a simple lifestyle, often enjoying the outdoors, and every day she would walk her beloved donkey down the road to the fields near her home so the donkey could graze very wholesome simple it's a simple life it's like an advert for like biscuits or something you know it's like walking the donkey and it's like remember the simple days down by the fields and you're like no but i wish i did exactly this lifestyle will the biscuits give me this life you're chomping down pack after pack obese in your one bedroom apartment the bigger and rounder

more biscuit like you get the less chance you have of bringing that donkey to pasture and then you wake up one morning and you're the donkey didn't see that one coming in the mirror and there's an ass staring back at you so one day she's walking the donkey down the path it's a beautiful day but all of a sudden this man and his son walk up to her and they yell hey that donkey is a menace what margaret is confused as are you. As you would be. Right, okay. It's a goddamn donkey.

She's got no idea what's going on. It's just a donkey. The man says, tell her, son. Your donkey is a menace. You heard that already. Good boy. I was by the fields yesterday, and he bit me, which may not sound like a serious thing,

but I did a little research on donkeys and these little bastards are like chain chomps really if they bite you you will feel it not to mention they are sort of the rats of the farm world they're just harboring disease after disease after disease yeah so you do not want to get within biting distance of one of these puppies absolutely not which is about 500 yards because they are fast as well like a chain chomp exactly but that still seems like a weird thing this is a this is a peaceful donkey do you know that yeah peaceful donkey his name's chompy well the kid at this point it's things are escalating the kid is yelling the dad is yelling hell the donkey's

getting spooked yeah because things are going crazy and margaret is like okay whoa whoa let's all calm down all right look sir your your kid obviously is a little piece of dirt my donkey is a chill donkey he's a damn angel actually trompy would never bite a soul the dad is furious of course but margaret refuses to hand over the donkey. Yeah, I mean, so what do they want to do in this instance? They want to take away the donkey to pasture, if you will? I guess it's similar to the current days if, like, if you're bitten by someone's dog, don't you then have the legal right to decide whether the dog gets put down?

It's, like, out of the control of the owner. Yeah, there's definitely a strike policy it's not like it's not like a the the dog nibbles you and then you have egyptian god like you know hammer of justice over that dog but if there's a couple times oh oh he bites the postman one day oh he went for the jugular that time oh geez he got a finger here there but margaret refuses to give the man over the donkey so they leave now a few days later margaret is once again walking her beloved donkey down the fields for some lovely grassy snacks they're walking down this lovely bridge to get to the fields. When suddenly, a group of men jump out from the bushes. What?

This is very disproportionate. It's the father and son, and they've brought backup. Another set of fathers and sons. It's a father-son donkey bashing meetup. An old-fashioned donkey bashing. These were the 1950s. There was not freaking Fortnite. You didn't have your iPhones.

You didn't have your social media profiles. What you did have is a big old rock and a chompy donkey. That's my kill streak. One. Well, the men jump out. Margaret tries to run away, but they grab the rope that she was leading the donkey with and yanked him backwards.

The donkey is freaking the hell out who wouldn't bite a man in this situation they're pushing him hell i bit men for way less than this that's right well in the struggle for control the donkey lost his footing and accidentally fell off of the bridge down into the river drowning almost immediately why does someone drown immediately you just splash into the water and never resurface yeah just boom yeah like gone no bubbles fades into the water margaret and the men all just leaning over the bridge and they're like wow that was actually really fast okay all right boys job well done or do you think like the death was so epic that they knew it was the end like it's a stumble and then he fell backwards and then into like the

darkness of the night he was like right there's no coming back from that you're not coming back you're not gonna pop up with a carrot in your mouth there's not another eat all after that after that there's no coming back from that. You're not coming back. You're not going to pop up with a carrot in your mouth. There's not another Eon after that. After that. There's only one. After you've done that last epic Eon. Well, the job was done. I guess.

These men had officially become donkey murderers. But would that be the only murder that day? As the men walked away, the heartbroken Margaret picked up a large rock. Whoa. And threw it as hard as she could towards the group, hitting one of the men in the back of the head and rendering him unconscious.

Unfortunately, now the rest of the gang turned around. Ran at Margaret, threw her over the bridge, and she drowned immediately. just like the beloved donkey with a falling like 200 feet to her death and everyone's like she ever made that noise before that was weird right

like i know she loved the donkey but that that's a weird thing for anyone to make. For dying words. For Eon. Like, she had a family. She had a husband and kids. So what are your thoughts so far? Tragic story, right? Tragic and real.

Is this the same biscuit ad? Is this the director's cut of the biscuit ad? What are the biscuits called? Hmm. Chompies? Oh, so close. I like chompies. Chompies are good.

Chompies. Because chompy sounds like the guy who makes the biscuits. So it's chompies. Hey, it's chompies. You know what this totally is, actually? Go on. This is a marshmallow included cereal. They're called chompies.

Okay. And this goddamn donkey called chompy is always trying to get a bowl of chompy's right but anytime he shows up to get a bowl a group of vigilante men throw him over a bridge and kill him yeah you'll never get a bowl of my chompy's and it's a river of chocolate cereal milk presumably he still drowns horrifically though yes even faster somehow the chocolate's thick think like what so it wouldn't be marshmallows though it would be like maybe carrot slices whole wheat and carrot slices well it has to be the simple days of yours so i don't know if they had marshmallows back then grass maybe grass cereal

fine i mean let me explain why the goat wants some the donkey wait what yeah the greatest of all time donkey the donkey was the freaking goat um it's a crazy story i'll admit it and i and hell i'll go on the line right now to tell you i got zero evidence to back it up i know what's to come is so goddamn believable, you don't need any evidence. All you need is an ice cold bowl and chompies. Can we at least know that you didn't personally invent the story? Can I at least know that? I plead the fifth, sir.

Well, I know what you're thinking, Kit. Double homicide. This case is over. That's not how the law works. But maybe it's not over, Kit. Because... Shut up! Because through the years, people in the surrounding areas

have reported strange sightings in the woods. Specifically, near the bridge now known as Donkey Lady Bridge. Donkey Lady Bridge? That's what it's called. Donkey Lady Bridge in San Antonio, Texas. Really? Here is just one of those testimonies. One night in late 1987,

while at my best friend's house, four fellow companions showed up, bored and looking for something to do. We suggested they visit the Donkey Lady Bridge. Is this person 13? This is not something grown adults do now this location this location was only a short drive from the house five or six miles and was a local favorite amongst late night stories okay the friends agreed and soon were driving out of sight about six later, their vehicle returned to our driveway with only one occupant. What?

Assuming he had taken the girls home. Okay. We went out, anxious to greet him. What we found at the car is something I'll never forget. The windshield was busted, the front dented, and there was what appeared to be blood all over the hood. Okay, a car crash. Possibly. Right. Or, a car crash. Possibly. Right.

Or, where did they go? I don't want to hold your hand too much on this one. Okay. Where did they take the... They went driving late at night. Yeah. A bunch of people, maybe after a couple beers. Yeah.

Driving into the woods. They took the car. Uh-huh. And where did I say... Did they say it was popular with late night stories? Right. The bridge. And the name of the bridge?

The name of the bridge they went to in the car? I don't remember. Do you know? What was the animal the lady had? That died in the river? Okay, it was the donkey. The donkey bridge! Lady donkey bridge!

Right. After several minutes of consistent badgering, we finally got him to talk. He, Lisa, Terry, and Jill arrived at the bridge. They began to honk their horn, trying to summon the legendary donkey lady. That's how you do it? Honking your horn? You'd think it would be like eeyawing or something.

Right. But I think it's similar to the goat man, where if you just kind of piss about too long in the area, you just goad him. Taunt them wwe style after about 15 minutes of not seeing anything here we go they decided to go into the woods of course and look for themselves what happened next was truly incredible and if i hadn't known john all my life and seen that car i would not have believed him while walking in the woods john said he got the feeling they

were being watched he immediately stopped and told everyone to be quiet looking around and evaluating the situation he discovered what appeared to be two eyes staring at them off in the distance okay okay could be any animal at this point could be man beast donkey could be could be any of the you know the main predators of the jungle yes lion donkey human any of them baby donkey adult donkey ass which is short for right donkey jackass donkey again yeah um shrek's companion donkey a mule of sorts some sort of mule ass donkey. These eyes seem to be reflecting the moonlight. The girls panicked and began to run back to the car.

Which I don't think anyone's ever said about donkeys before, that their eyes reflect the moonlight. Also, that's kind of a romantic thing to say. Yeah. You never were just like, we were in the woods and we saw these gorgeous hazel eyes just staring back at me i just it was like two just infinity pools i just couldn't stop staring two beautifully symmetrical furry ears just caked

in donkey shit a perfect row of symmetrical donkey teeth clamping down on my jugular the girls panicked and began to run back to the car good impression thanks man john was quick to follow and soon after he turned away there was a horrible scream from the direction of the eyes he cried is that what is that what he said did he say the is that your artistic license he was like oh, it couldn't have been man or beast. It was like, Eeyore. He described it as almost being a cry from an intelligent animal. You imagine the intelligent cry of the animal. You think it's going to be like a whale that kind of sounds human,

but it's just like, we're heading towards an economic bubble. We're heading towards an economic bubble. Those who do not study history are doomed to repeat it. The wisest donkey ever. Too afraid to turn around. Scared of intellect, I guess. He picked up the pace as he ran to the car. When he got there, the girls were already in the car,

screaming for him to get in and leave. They were reversing as fast as they could. As he was trying to find the keys, he heard what seemed to be the sounds of a horse running in their direction. Okay. Like a tiny little horse. Okay. Like a slow-ass horse. Starting the car, he slammed it into gear and put it to the floor.

This is a very dramatic retelling of this story. It really is. Suddenly, a figure appeared in the road in front of them. Too afraid to stop, John collided with the figure, hitting it with the hood of the car, and it rolled over the roof. Looking in his rearview mirror, he said he thought the figure stood up and continued to pursue them.

After hearing this and seeing the condition of the car steve and i immediately felt this deserved a second look john told us he would never return to that bridge again but if we wanted to risk our lives go right ahead grabbing two flashlights and a pair of shotguns we jumped in my pickup grabbed an ice cold bowl of chompies and made our way. I feel like you're in a dab video. No, just he actually, I just, we're not sponsored. It's our sponsor that you're not telling me about. I want to say we're not sponsored on this podcast, but obviously chompies is the most delicious bowl of cereal.

And for the small price of $4.99, you can get them at any real retailer. That's all I'm saying. They're going to charge me. They're going to pay me less because I fucked up the ad. Yeah, you got to watch this week. Don't think I didn't notice. You got to gotta watch and i feel like you're withholding sponsorship money i'm not it's just i'm just pissed because if we were sponsored every time i say something wrong when i say the sponsor they dock my pay right they do because it's happening i'm just

saying hypothetically if i was talking about chomsky Chompy's, the best bowl of cereal in town. Oh, I'm tripping up now. Sorry, just, I need to get this right. It's not sponsored. If you just tell me. It's not sponsored. I can edit it. I can edit the episode so that you get it right.

Just let me do, just let me say the phrase. Look, I have it here. It's not sponsored, but I have to say this. Just let me say the phrase. Look, I have it here. It's not sponsored, but I have to say this. This summer, enjoy an ice-cold bowl of the... So clunky. Holy shit.

Ice-cold bowl of the new and improved... Is it hot in here? Christ. I can feel the money just leaving my wallet. Wow. Chompy's now... Just hypothetical. Still hypothetical.

Now with even more grass. Really? Fresh from the fields. It sounds awful. No one's going to buy this. Donkey ain't getting none of my chompy's now hypothetical now and now and with even more grass really fresh from the fields no one's gonna buy this donkey ain't getting none of my chompy's i need it i need to text kyle give me one second just kyle i f***ed it up okay so kyle works at chompy's can i be again You've been doing this in previous episodes? I edit in ads after we've done it. Yeah, super smart

that I'm going to be editing this week's episode and you think that if you just slip in a live read that I'll just keep all of that in there. If you could tighten it up as well

because I felt like it was a little loose on delivery and as I said I made that abundantly clear they dock my pay and I'm really stressed this month because I felt like it was a little loose on delivery. And as I said, I made that abundantly clear. They dock my pay. And I'm really stressed this month. I feel like it should be our pay. All they pay me in as well is chompies. I'm going to level with you.

I've got a f***ing ton of chompies and I need to move units. I was looking for deals and I may have swapped 95% stake in this podcast for 5% stake in Chompy's. An ambitious and inventive North Korean cereal brand that I really thought was going to take the market. And it just isn't grabbing people. So anything we can do to move units again would be great. Cut this, please. Unfortunately, Chompy's is Korean for poison. It's Korean for Lombardi.

We were actually scammed by a previous lombardi buyer he bought 12 000 units for 10 dollars a bottle and we bought 10 000 crates of chompies we bought all but we bought all our lombardi back is what i'm trying to tell you how there's a foreign word for the name lombardi i have no idea but that's just where we are so we can just keep the ad in because again we need to move units apparently thank you so they headed out into the woods with their shotguns yeah and they turned on the many road lights that the truck had illuminating this bad boy okay there's one thing the paranormal creatures don't like is light yeah that's what god is okay so they're gonna they're not gonna like weirdly poetic an opinion to have.

That really threw me. That really threw you. Your own thought threw you hugely. These lights lit the road and the woods to every side of them as if it was daytime. I changed the tense and I need to change it back because I was telling it from their point of view. And now I started telling it from a third person. So I'm going back to them. Because I was telling it from their point of view, and now I started telling it from a third person.

So I'm going back to them. The first thing we noticed as the bridge drew near was the numerous amounts of blood all over the road. However, these were the only signs of evidence that we could find. To this day, none of the four individuals involved in the story have returned to the bridge. Did John actually see and strike the donkey lady that night or was it merely a stray pony startled by their presence all i know is something was there that night and it scared our friends half to death so i'm confused so it's called donkey lady bridge as if that is one thing a donkey lady a goat man like like being a donkey lady but i heard no mention of any lady whatsoever are you saying that whenever they were both tossed over the bridge

into the water below that they both drowned and fused into a donkey lady i'm really glad you brought that up kit because there is a number of stories of the origin of this creature, how it came to be, and you're not far off one of the most popular explanations, whether you want to be or not. The legend states that when Margaret and Chompy the donkey died, their spirits combined into one. Of course. And now they angrily roam the forest looking for vengeance. I don't know about you i would be pissed off if i came back to life but i was half fused with a donkey but that is that is the the origin that is one of the ideas fine exactly could you imagine as well you're you're this woman you're

thrown off of the bridge you fall down into the cold water smack your head the world around you like is fading to a pinpoint and then all of a sudden there's this like this glowing light yeah and this figure in front of you finally you're like finally jesus and said going back to earth not allowed then i talked to the devil he's really on board with the situation little con though you me together that would be the scariest thing in the world it's it's the like the existential version of if you know you're meeting your friends you're going to a restaurant you're running a little bit late and you get to the restaurant and they're like hey listen we're in a rush we had to order for you is that all right i just got you the regular regular burger in your head you're like of course

damn it of course i don't want i had a burger yesterday i wanted to try the goddamn special spaghetti that was on the menu you're like oh shit i don't want i had a burger yesterday i wanted to try the goddamn special spaghetti that was on the menu you're like oh shit i don't have to sit through this crappy meal i'd even get to order the cosmic version of that is your donkey dies before you and and he gets a good two minute three minute head start of talking to god about how you guys want to spend the afterlife so you turn up the the goddamn white light of jesus blaring and you know as soon as you get there you're like oh my god jesus it's so good to no need the donkey has spoken your wish is granted all of a sudden the pearly gates start flying away from you you're hurled back into the darkness wake up in the icy waters

half man half donkey no sooner do you see the pearly gates than you see a donkey and jesus himself spitting into their hands and shaking on your fate it doesn't bear thinking about folks and that's why this is one of the most terrifying paranormal tales we've ever talked about right here on the podcast exactly well as we said john didn't actually see the donkey lady but there are a number of descriptions of the creature from other sightings again it's a wide scope we've got some people saying it's more like a ghost like a spirit okay others saying that she's a full living creature half donkey half human similar to the goat man and i guess the wendigo as well the donkey lady is said to have enormous strength scary eyes beastly screams

and a rage that haunts any who bother her to come into the vicinity. If you honk your horn near the bridge or even chill for too long, she will appear and she will wreck you. It's a bit like a double negative. If you take two things that are ordinarily quite weak, a small donkey and an old lady, and combine them, they become supernaturally strong and terrifying now similar to bloody mary there's a number of different origin stories about the donkey lady there's the one that i just told you about being thrown into the river but there's also more

stories one of the other popular ones is that she actually lost her children in a house fire that was started by her husband. Whoa. She was horribly disfigured in the fire, fusing her fingers and toes together. What? Creating hoof-like hands. Oh, Jesus. Oh, so she never had a donkey? No, in this story, she just became a donkey-looking woman.

Yeah. Her head was so badly burned in the fire that it healed in such a warped, elongated way it resembled that of a donkey. Oh, f*** off. Now, I investigated this case and I desperately searched for any kind of evidence. As you know, this is the 1950s. People didn't keep track of this stuff.

I'm sure they did. Hitting a donkey woman with a car was just like you know the newspaper boys accidentally smacking you with the back of the paper it's just one of those everyday things you're like why am i gonna take a why am i gonna take a dna sample from the newspaper boy i'm not gonna do that why am i gonna take a dna sample from the blood of the donkey lady it just wasn't a thing is any of this helping fine well i searched and i searched and unfortunately could not find any photographic evidence could not find any dna evidence okay and could convenient couldn't

find any strong testimonies really feel like they had testimonies back in the 50s they did photographs they had all these things i feel like there was a number of witnesses according to the story you're skeptical but wait to the bomb i'm about to drop on you right now i found on the comment section of a website doesn't get much more trustworthy than that a woman named mandy guerrera okay she commented saying i found a phone and i should do a woman's voice actually because her name's mandy i found a phone number off the internet several years back that was supposedly the donkey lady's. A phone number? The donkey lady whose hands are fused together has a phone?

That was one of many stories. She could also be a half donkey, half lady with human hands. And a phone? It was on a website with many other Texas haunted sites. So I called it and when they picked up the phone, it sounded like a squealing pig getting slaughtered.

So I hung up. What? So I hung up and I called back and when I heard it again, it sounded even more pissed off. It was so crazy. How could it sound more pissed off it was so crazy how could it sound more pissed off than a pig getting slaughtered holy shit if that's your like level

five of annoyance yeah what is what's your time no human could have made that insane squealing noise also it was not a recording because it was slightly different the second time uh the second time i called back but in a creepier way. I like to think that this is some young person pranking people by listing this phone number online. And whenever they just see an unknown number call, they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, I'm just taking a call here, but bear with me one second. Sir, sorry, sir. I'm just calling to interest. did you apply for a ppi service in the last i am so last two years i'm so sorry my pig god uh my pig died uh just in front of the phone

we are time to call and why did you answer yeah sorry you we weren't close i know i'm supposed to be the uh the telephone salesman but i just want to clarify something you saw unknown number on your phone yeah as your pig was dying, and you took the call. I'm very busy. Let's get this over with. I'm no longer interested in filing your claim. I'm sorry.

Have a good life. I regret that. My condolences to the pig. Please do not harm any other pigs. There's another one. Please stop harming the pigs. I'm also confused by the existence of a cryptid's phone number well where do we go from here does the bigfoot have a pager does the chupacabra have a skype address this sounds unbelievable and that's

why i first put this in my research notes because i was like this is ridiculous okay then some people started replying to mandy and being like oh my god i had the exact same phone number like i used to call it all the time with my friends this happened a number of times until it got to the point where i just googled donkey lady phone number okay and there was numbers and numbers of times on the internet where allegedly there was at one point a phone number you could call. It was set up to be like, this is the donkey lady's phone number. But it was just horrible squealing on the other end. 0800, it was an 0800 number.

0800 donkey lady, you call it. It's like, press 1 to talk to the donkey. Press 2 to speak to the donkey. Press 2 to speak to the lady. Now, I know you're not going to be excited about this part, but that's all the evidence I have on the case of the donkey lady. Is that you heard that the donkey lady had a phone number? Look, do you want me to try and find it right now? Yeah. Oh, shit.

You called my bluff. Well done, sir. My phone's dead. All right. I'm going to look it up. I'm going to call the first number I can find. Because we know someone out there in the paranormal nation is psycho enough to try this. So you might as well do it for them.

Exactly. Just while I'm having a quick break here when I'm checking my phone, I just want to remind you that in stores from August onwards, stores from August onwards. The new flavors of Rainbow Chompies can be found on the shelves of all the shopping stores. You're a skilled

orator. It's your job to present. I don't know why you fall apart when it's for Chompies. It's not a lot of pressure. It's a North Korean cereal firm. Make every adventure a day. That can't be their slogan. It doesn't make any sense. Make every adventure a day. You't be their slogan it doesn't make any sense make every adventure a day you're making it up chompy's buy now for the there's no way you're given that

much artistic license in new box of chompy's now now toys i'm really getting stressed out here buy chompies buy them buy chompy's that's what was taking you so long north korea's finest every adventure's a day chompy's buy now toys inside every adventure's a day um okay here we go reliable source yeah who answers what is the donkey lady's phone number all right i can't believe this is a thing donkey lady's phone number here we go let try this. I've been sent to a website. Shrinky. I am. That does not sound.

I'm just like, Oh, someone's posted it here. I'm going to, it's porn. It's donkey porn. There's not even a lady involved. It's just donkey on donkey action.

It appears even with extensive internet searching. Yeah. I cannot find the actual extensive one-handed iphone google searching uh we couldn't quite come across that number unfortunately yeah but you don't want call out to our our listeners here if you can find that number we will call it live on the pod we'll get to the bottom of this case. Unfortunately, we're going to have to make our conclusion without hearing from the donkey lady herself. But you know what? Sometimes in the paranormal world,

you got to come to a conclusion a little bit early. It happens to one in three men and there's no shame in it. So Kit, what do you think about this case? This is bananas. This is one of the least substantiated claims I've ever heard in the paranormal world. Of course. So crazy. It must be true, right?

There seems to be almost no consensus over what even happened. Cool, cool, cool. Whether the donkey existed, whether it was a woman that looked like a donkey. I mean, the fact that I can't even prove there was a donkey is pretty bad that seems like that shouldn't be a hard thing to prove yeah okay cool yeah i can see where this is going uh yeah i feel like that it may just you asked me a question so i'm just answering yeah i just want to tell you i need to take it so personally let's get this over with because i know what you're gonna say so it's fine i don't know why you take it so personally. Four hours I spent looking at donkey pics

and I couldn't even prove this ass is real. How do you think that makes me feel? The only jackass I can prove that exists is me for investigating this pile of garbage. I'm not even sure I'm real. How about that? Like I say, there's not a lot to go on here. I'm sure a lady existed.

I'm sure a donkey existed. I'm sure a donkey existed. I'm sure ladies and donkeys have died in bridges all over Texas and further afield. Do I believe that some people who hit something with their truck in the woods and cause it to bleed means that there is a paranormal donkey woman haunting San... What was it? San Antonio. San Antonio, Texas. No. No, I don't believe that. that there is a paranormal donkey woman hunting san what was it san antonio san antonio texas uh no no i don't believe that i mean they hit something at donkey lady bridge right i don't want to put words in your mouth but really hone in just because it's called donkey lady bridge

doesn't mean that it's paranormal i mean the bridge probably didn't have a name before that. That's true. What do you think of this case? It's an interesting one. I mean, this testimony isn't even from a newspaper. It's from an online source. Yes. And I think the lack of information, at least credible information regarding this case,

would lead me to believe that, unfortunately, it is no more than folklore. But it's an interesting story and you know we've had lots of half beast half man cases before it's true we've never had half beast half lady that's true and i thought this would be a good one to throw in the mix absolutely uh unfortunately not real no which continues our string of no's on the podcast. I don't think there's been a half-crypted, half-human story that's real yet. No, but we're hunting for them. Yeah. We believe it's out there. For the stories and the beasts themselves. And hopefully we'll get to it very, very soon.

Thank you so much for that submission, Josh Miller. If you have your own submission that you want us to investigate, why not email in to thisparanormallifepodcast at gmail.com. If you want to hit us up on the social media networks, we are on Twitter at thisparalife. And on Facebook, we have our secret society where big-ass brain humans can come together and talk about the paranormal world, what we're going to do in the

commune best bowl best flavor of chompy's available currently that will change because obviously i said in the uh from august forward we have brand new rainbow chompy's toy inside every adventures a day by chompy's three plugs at this point for absolutely no money stutter that time so i'm getting the full check for that one okay oh but wait i'm not getting the check because i didn't i didn't mention where you could buy them okay it's fine i'll just say that line and then i thought we were promoting um facebook secret society i just gotta do the tell them where they can get it and we're done okay literally two words fine if all this stuttering over the store the name of the store you can get it for all them stores all what am i saying all them stores what is that we gotta wrap this up we gotta wrap this up i'm

losing i'm losing pennies your phone is blowing up i can see that notification notification just one keith yeah i did again keith i said all them stores again i know i you said i know it was the one thing you said not to say how are you on such speaking terms with this casual? Keith? He did me a solid. Is he North Korean? And I did him a liquid. Uh-oh. Sorry, Keith. Yeah, I did.

I really messed it up. North Korean? Yeah. And his name's Keith? Yeah. That's his alias. His English? Poor.

Business? Poor. I can hear him yelling. I can hear him squealing like a donkey. So thank you so much for listening to this episode if you really enjoy the show and want to give that little extra bit we have the this paranormal life patreon where you know we don't run ads on this show obviously not one single ad was read out on this show not true we make all of our money not from north korea but from the patreon where from as

little as two dollars a month we can give you a whole bunch of bonus stuff including all the research notes that go into these episodes bonus episodes t-shirts lombardi polaroids there's so much stuff that you can get while supporting the podcast we really appreciate it it's uh kind of a cool community i think to be part of this kind of like call me commune commun me commune of people um that are all together so we'll get together we're really excited about it um so definitely check that out if you're interested and if you do contribute to the patreon we like to give you a special shout out at the end of the episode so here we go thank you to carissa b buzz buzz thanks for the honey carissa b we really appreciate it in the paranormal Here we go. Thank you to Carissa B. Buzz, buzz.

Thanks for the honey, Carissa B. We really appreciate it in the paranormal beehive. So thank you for your support. Where, of course, we are the queens of the hive. Double queens. And everyone else is a worker slave. That is just how communes operate. I don't know why you said slave.

You could have just said worker bee. It's much more nice. It fits with the tone. I just want to make sure that everyone knows who the queen is and who the slave is. Right. Don't say slaves. That's a bad word. Thank you to Jay Ronan. Jay, I know you've been roaming around for a community, but look, you've found your new family.

It's right here. Down right. In the paranormal commune. and roaming around for a community, but look, you find your new family. It's right here. Down right. In the paranormal commune. Now place your hand on this DVD box set of the X-Files and swear allegiance to the paranormal commune. Welcome aboard, brother. Give us your coins. Day one, tax day.

Welcome to the cult, baby. Step in through this small pyramid for the initiation hazing tax day day one thank you to Chris Warnes Chris we did warn you

about tax day and you still decided to come to the commune come on down we operate like hogwarts uh you know how they have a sorting hat they kind of put you in in your groups we have a sorting tinfoil hat that you put on and it blocks all interference and just uh tells you which dorm to go to you put on that tinfoil hat we try as hard as we can using all technology at our disposal to scramble your brain if you survive that faculty's intact welcome in brother thank you to richard hicks richard welcome to the commune buddy we appreciate you supporting the this paranormal

life patreon but we hope you saved a couple coins for tax day, day one. I know we've never mentioned it up until now, but we really need to ramp up the awareness of tax day. Yeah, because a lot of people are doing a 180 at the doors. So we need to let everyone know about tax day. And obviously it's all going back into the commune. It doesn't go to me and Kit. Hell no. No, it goes into the system.

Yeah, the system may include um clothes nice things for executive bonuses but but other than that other than that it all goes back into the system so who knows you might see a penny of your fortune come right back to you buddy thank you to chelsea mao did you know that uh chelsea was actually one of the first female medics that was allowed to serve on the front line in World War II? Really? Yeah, she was also the first one to defect immediately upon first gunshot with me. So old. So proud of having served in such an old war.

I wouldn't say we served. Thank you to Matt Harmon. Matt Harmon. Who you harming, Matt? Better not be anyone in the paranormal commune because we got all the guns from Tax Day. We actually know Matt from back in the day when I was laying low after my seventh defect

back in Northern Ireland. We became friends. For a short time before seventh defect back in Northern Ireland. We became friends. For a short time before I defected from the friendship. Thank you to Rye Sanderson. Rye, Rye, Mr. Sanderson guy. Thank you for the Patreon money. I can lie. And those chumpies taste so good in my eyes singing nowadays toys in the box side

by the chompy's time is alive i couldn't even do this song i couldn't even do this unbelievable it's so hard it's so hard to say even the bit where people are paying us so that we don't have to run ads you're turning that into an ad i don't know if i'm even going to get paid for that the way it was delivered so i think it's safe to say that wasn't an ad thank you to jake gimble jake i wouldn't want to gamble on breakfast why not have an ice cold bowl of chompies the bowl that you always know is going to be delicious. So buy some. Buy some now.

Thank you for contributing to the Patreon. I hope you're enjoying the most important meal of the day. That's great. Chompies. Awesome read. Thanks, man. I feel like I really got it that time. I feel like Jake really feels appreciated with that shout out.

I think he really feels like special. Yeah. Because I mean, like he enjoyed the show. He wanted to contribute and support it. He wanted to give some of his hard-earned money to the show. Yeah. And this was the reward was the shout out that he gets on the show. So I'm glad that what he got was an ad for Chumpies.

I wouldn't call that an ad. Thank you too. Lastly, but not leastly. Right. I'll be better this time. David Olinger. Eat Chompy's, David.

Your hand. Eat them now. It's around my throat. Please. The Chompy's, David. We need to move Chompy's. Please, guys don't it more to the Roy let's be here brain quick kids breathing that's the new hundred dollar tier every

career also gets a free bowl of chompy's the bowl is not included though more of a burlap sack of grass and milk it's the best damn cereal you'll ever have i think we're done here okay okay sure just wanted to get that in there thank you so much yeah do you want me to end it because you you're getting lazy or something you can't breathe or something what was going on this is abuse thank you for listening to the show we'll be back next week with a brand new paranormal case bye-bye Thank you.