This Paranormal Life - #076 Britney Spears is a CLONE

Episode Date: August 28, 2018

Is Britney Spears an Illuminati CLONE??Let's Investigate!Support us on Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife to get access to weekly bonus episodes!Buy Official TPL Merch! - thisparanormallife.com/storeFollow us on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTubeJoin our Secret Society Facebook CommunityIntro music by www.purple-planet.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When bears hibernate, do they really go back to their home planet? We've heard of chords such as A, C, and D, but what about chord X? What does that sound like? All of these questions you can find the answer to on This Paranormal Life. Boom! I was trying to make the chord X. I think the chord X is just truth. It's not so much as a musical note as like a realization that you've been brought up in a world of lies.

Yeah, I know for me that first came whenever I was a young kid. And sometimes you just get that knowledge that just hits you at the core of your very being. For me, that was hearing that I would never want to shit the age of four. We should point out that the X chord is similar to the brown note uh you will shit yourself yeah is what we're trying to say yeah if you haven't listened to this podcast before every week we investigate a brand new paranormal tale case conspiracy theories whatever and at the end of it we come to a conclusion as professional paranormal investigators as to whether or not the case that we've talked about is real or is it

false we've had a string of falses recently maybe one maybe one real uh a while ago yeah i'm hoping i can bring another big old reel to the table today awesome well i'm excited let's hear it well we're not going to be talking about a paranormal case this week i thought we'd mix it up and um and do like a conspiracy this oh okay yeah yeah listen the name of the show is this paranormal life but everyone who's listening right now everyone loves conspiracies what's more paranormal than a goddamn conspiracy not well greys right genuinely paranormal things of course yeah ghosts bigfoot spirit anything else literally anything hires basically episodes one to whatever yeah but this one

it's all about the conspiracy baby let's just dive right in okay all right i'm not going to tell you anything about this one we just got to get right into it okay it's 2004 and britney spears was at the top of her game wow she had already released such huge singles as hit me baby one more time and oops i did it again jesus I mean, back-to-back bangers. Exactly. Absolute bangers. No one is arguing that those are not bangers. And on top of this, she has just released Toxic.

Holy shit. I would argue is the best Britney Spears song of all time. Strong words, but... Things were good. Things were good in Britney's life. But in 2004, during a shoot for her upcoming music video, Britney fell and badly injured her leg. Oh, really?

This fall was bad. So bad that she was forced to cancel her tour and undergo surgery. Holy shit. I mean, she was athletic. Yeah. Not to mention, I think on the set of Toxic, there was probably snakes or something. There's probably venomous animals. I don't remember a lot of that music video, but wasn't she like an assassin on a plane?

Right. Just shanking people and breaking necks? That's ringing a bell. And I heard Britney is method. To shoot the music video Toxic, she was actually injected with a highly dangerous cell agent that killed four pop stars before her. Yeah. But she was the one to actually ride it through and be able to do the song which i think is you know fair play to her which i actually

think is kind of cool maybe that's why the song is so good because it comes from a place of reality like oops i did it again you know she messed up she messed up before knees hurt has to take a break and cancel the tour but while she was on this break word started to spread about a new song called mona lisa that she was working on which was weird because britney was supposed to be on a hiatus from work and no new music was planned at all then on december, 2004, something strange happened. Radio host Jesse Lozano is in the middle of presenting at LA's hottest station, KISS FM. KISS FM.

KISS FM. KISS FM. Welcome to the hottest radio station in LA. Yo, what's up? It's... What's his name? Uh, Jesse Lozano. Jesse Lozano here. Yo, what's up? What's his name? Jesse Lozano.

Jesse Lozano here. How are you feeling out there, LA? Now, we have got a very special premiere for you this afternoon. We are bringing you the X-Node. That's right, folks. A new frontier of the world's musical horizons. And we're pretty excited to see how you guys are enjoying it out there. He's on Kiss FM when all of a sudden he gets a phone call at the station. Hey, what's up?

You're on the line with Jesse Lozano. Oh, wait, this was a private phone call. He probably didn't sound like that. Maybe he did. Jesse Lozano. Jesse Lozano. Can you please just talk like a normal human? You f***ing creep.

The phone is quiet, but then he hears on the other side. Hey, this is Britney Spears. I want to come and play my new song. First off, nothing works like that in LA. Kanye doesn't call you and go, what up? I have a track. His managers talk to your people. These things are months in advance.

You know, this isn't how this thing works ideally no one even talks to anyone you know your people have their own people their people have their own people the the song is loaded onto a usb pen and fired out of one of those like t-shirt cannons like through the office window into the computer it downloads immediately and goes on the air that's how i want to live when i order a goddamn sub sandwich i don't want to talk to the delivery man i don't want to talk to the guy the cashier i want that bad boy high velocity fired into my cake hole that's how i want to live and ideally that's how i want to die it blows right out the back of your skull they actually put it on high fired that blt through

the back of my throat and then all the rory fans will be on conspiracy subreddits being like there's no way he was able to fire the blt cannon himself it was murder the blt contained a cheese that rory did not have in his fridge. He did not make the sandwich. He thinks this is a prank, but he goes along with it. He says, okay, Brittany. Okay, Brittany, come on by the studio. We'll play your new song. If Brittany does call, you know, what are you going to do?

Call that person's bluff and just be like, oh, yeah, real likely, Brittany, if that is your real name. You know, you're just going to go. This is LA. Everyone's sucking up to everyone. You know, you're just going to go. This is L.A. Everyone's sucking up to everyone. You just got to do it. Very fast pace. You just got to say yes to every opportunity that comes your way. Yes, yes, yes, yes.

Give me the drugs. Give me the drugs. I'll take them. Put the money in the bag. It's just L.A. life, baby. And before he knows it, it isn't long before Brittany arrived at the station with her bodyguard. Wow. The Brittany Spears in the flesh.

The first strange thing was that when she arrived, there was no press, no paparazzi, no newspapers. Okay. At all. You know, she might have evaded them. Who knows?

But this, as we said, this is Britney at her god damn peak. Yeah, TMZ aren't letting up on this puppy. If she goes to the supermarket to buy a banana. Front page news. Front page news. Britney uses banana to smoke crack

it was taking anything at the time banana gate page three so they're live on the radio talking about her new album okay and jesse asked britney you're saying you got a new album coming out yeah i haven't decided on a title for the project but I'm leaning towards the original doll. After a brief chat, Britney introduced the song. Little did anyone know that this was going to be the first and last time

Mona Lisa would ever be heard on the radio. Okay, this is her new song. Holy shit. This is Britney's new song. This song has just come out of nowhere. Here's the spoken intro. This is a story about Mona Lisa. new song. This song has just come out of nowhere. Here's the spoken intro. About Mona Lisa And how she suddenly fell

I see everyone knew her They knew her oh so well Now I'm taking over To release her from her spell The song played in its entirety and people were immediately weirded out with how rough it sounded compared to her usual polished pop sound. Fans of Britney Spears' live show, however, were very much at home.

Even more unusual were the lyrics to the chorus. The lyrics were, She's the original, she's unforgettable, she wants you to know know yeah, she's been cloned She's so unpredictable she wants you to know yeah, she's been cloned After the debut of the new single obviously the papers are blowing up People are calling her managers her record label asking about her new album but when anyone asked, they replied that Mona Lisa would not be serviced to the radio, and

no new album is in production at the moment. Weird. What is going on here, Kit? I don't want to ask too much of you. I'm really enjoying the story so far. You said this went on in Kiss FM. One of the most popular radio stations probably in north america

absolutely do we have a recording of this we do have a recording of this okay do you want to hear it please all right jojo's top nine at nine kiss fm spears live in studio do you have to take a super secret cia mission secure uh route to burbank from your weird already i didn't see anybody outside there wasn't one camera anywhere. I know, it's great. How'd you pull it off? I don't know, he just kind of snuck away. Did you put him a disguise on?

Snuck away? Disguises? CIA? What are you sneaking away from? Good luck with your album. It's untitled. It's probably going to be called The Original Doll. And it's half done?

Yeah, it's halfway done right now. All right, so maybe by the summer? Maybe by the by the fall yeah maybe a little bit earlier all right well more of her new song i know right now okay i'll cheat that's the next song number one next starting radio is mental isn't it it's just noise it's just batshit crazy noise before we have britney spears debut her number like you've already introduced i know just get to it okay i think this is it second first i almost forgot we got cool freebies 805 jesus christ jesse season one on dvd it's yours right now Caller 102 Gets hooked up Here we go

Britney's new song Go ahead darling Hi what's up This is Britney Spears And this is Mona Lisa And it's number 1 Number 1 Number 1

102.7 Kiss Jesus Christ man Shut up She was taken under Drowning in her sea Running like an angel She was taken under, drowning in her sea. Running like an angel, she was crying but could not see.

Oh no! Now see, everyone's watching as she starts to fall. Now don't have a breakdown, you will hit the freaking wall. She's a forgettable... What's your explanation for this so far i mean got none thought so move on let's proceed definitely you know even the radio dj was remarking it was weird that she didn't even have any like entourage yeah didn't you did you take some cia route out here she was like no i escaped yeah songs weird it could just be bad still devil's advocate here what if she has just gone above the head of her like label and management team and everything the illuminati and yeah maybe she's just gone

over the head of her team here and and just showcased something that they didn't want to get out they were like britney this song sucks the world cannot hear this and she's like it's my art it's my art that's so good i'm gonna show what's what's his name was it joey jesse i'm gonna call jesse right now he's gonna hear my art and he's gonna show my art to the world have you ever heard britney spears before have you ever heard her talk yeah hit me baby once again not the title not the title of any of her songs poisonous toxic but maybe they they didn't want this song to get out because it sucked i don't know you know it does suck she she went through a rough time we all know that what about the course i've been cloned she just said i've been cloned i forgot to

listen to that on the on the play on the playback though she wants you to know she's been cloned she's been cloned she's been cloned i did it three times i didn't hear that though it will it'll be in the edit okay unless I can't find it and then it's all cut. She's so unpredictable She wants you to know She's been gone She's been gone She's been gone Alright, well, seeing as we're covering a conspiracy here, we're gonna go with the most popular theory out there.

Why does her record label deny the album exists? What are these strange lyrics about? Well, Kit, what britney spears had been cloned just like she said just like she said just like she hinted at so subtly in her course she's been cloned she wants you to know she's been cloned it's little hidden messages like that that make me see the bigger picture everyone else missed it but i think she's been cloned just imagining her in the studio with jesse the album's coming out like next week and then while he's talking she's just mouthing at him help me help every time the chorus every time

the chorus says she's been cloned she like nudges him in the shoulder you see kit back at the start of 2004 where this story began britney spears was the biggest star in the world right but for the first time she was getting a lot of bad press oh she impulsively married her childhood friend and then got annulled 55 hours later jesus her live performances were getting slated by music blogs britney was going bad and as the biggest pop star in the world who was making them an incredible amount of money this just could not happen this was a cash cow that you couldn't have churning out sour milk is that a thank you yeah i know i should stop there but i feel like i could get another one let's go for it this was uh i should have stopped but i've started. Let's go for it. This was a...

I should have stopped, but I've started the send, so we're going to go again. This was a goddamn... This was a golden chicken that kept laying goddamn... Omelets. Pre-cooked omelets. This was a goddamn jellyfish that made perfect jelly. Peanut butter and all. This is a f***ing sea lion that couldn't roar.

I don't even know what she is anymore. Is she bad or good? Whatever she was, this couldn't roar i don't even know what she is anymore is she bad or good whatever she was this couldn't happen so later that year is when britney had her little accident on set okay okay she fell injured her knee not that big of a deal but the doctors insisted that she have arthroscopic surgery on her knee oh seems. Seems strange just for injuring your knee, doesn't it? Hey, Doc. I took a tumble while we were dancing, but, I mean, it was nothing, but, like, the management, they're just insisting that I come see you

just to get, like, a look once over. So, anyway, I'll, like, sit up on the desk here. All right, that's great. Could you just put this wooden stick in your mouth so I can get a look at your tonsils. Fine, sure. I have nothing to do with the injury. If you could just say, you need surgery. What?

You need surgery right now. Nurse, get everyone in here! Yeah, we're gonna be putting you to... That's to put you to sleep. Good night, Brittany. I guess you could say you're toxic and slipping under. Everyone get in here, please. Take her blood, take her DNA, take everything. She's like, I'm not out yet oh we missed the vein okay sit still sweetheart i'm just imagining her going to the doctor and her just being like yeah i think i just might have pulled a muscle i guess i might

just take a week off or whatever he's like just pulls out like a DIY hammer and just smashes the outside of her kneecap. Nurse, take your blood, take everything, take the bone. I'm not under yet. Stop saying things before I'm under. So she had the anthroposcopic surgery and that was all they needed. Now they had blood samples, skin tissue, bone marrow, goddamn DNA juice. Everything you would need to make a full clone.

Is it everything we need? I mean, humans haven't been cloned yet? Humans haven't been cloned yet. You call yourself the goddamn co-host of this podcast and you're saying

humans haven't even been cloned yet. How do I know? You're not a goddamn clone. Can you prove to me in any way that a human being has been cloned yet? By the end of this episode you're going to goddamn clone can you can you prove to me in any way that a human being has been cloned yet by the end of this episode you're gonna be yes you're gonna be yes just i'm like can you prove to me in any way another rory steps out behind you oh shit what do you have to say now kids so they cloned her and what happened i'll tell you what happened

kit britney found out she knew that the higher-ups had cloned her, and she knew that there was another Brittany ready to take her place the second she got too old or tired or disobedient. The big three. Yeah. I mean, God forbid she become an old, tired, disobedient woman. Jesus Christ. So from 2004 onwards,ney struggled to deal with the

knowledge that she had in fact been cloned she had to smile through every performance knowing that at any moment she could be abducted and swapped out for a clone do you think her manager like you know on a night that she was just like she was like this is bullshit i had two concerts in one day like i haven't even had a break for three months like i'm getting overworked here like i need i need some time off i need uh better conditions and the manager wheels in the britney clone he's like now now britney you wouldn't want to be replaced by britney too would you and like britney too is like is like they haven't they haven't nailed the clone yet she's like cross-eyed it's like she looks just like you and performs in

every way pushes a button on her side i'm poison i'm going to die soon okay okay okay so this is the problem that she faces how can she let people know what was going on well that's where she had her idea kit for mona lisa okay right in person she could tell a handful of people in a song she could tell millions so what was going on true this you know this is like i don't know something like we've talked about what are they called like uh doppelgangers. No. Bigfoot. No. We have talked about all those things, yes. Right.

It's like one of those, you know, wartime cryptic codes that you use. Oh, no. Right, sorry. I should stop interrupting. I said wartime cryptic. Vampires. Again, no. Still not vampires. Right, sorry.

Just let me finish the sentence. So it's like a cryptic code. Right. sorry just let me finish okay so it's like a cryptic code right and the code was written by no nasty no i'm gonna let you finish please i think it's easier if we just let it's like a code cool that you that within a seemingly innocuous set of information information you can you can what don't try and finish my sentences i just feel like we're in this together now sorry or not i'm finishing my point and then i'll counterpoint we've been over this so many times so you can wait till i finish my point gotcha

sorry you haven't got excited you haven't got it in a seemingly innocuous piece of information someone could encode something that could be a person with the right tools could be able to decipher this and and get the hidden message within true i think the problem is that maybe she went too subtle with it only high class paranormal detectives conspiracy experts like ourselves were able to take from that song that she had in fact been cloned yeah because the song's called Mona Lisa. So everyone's thinking, well, it's not about Britney. It's about Mona Lisa.

Yeah. Was she cloned? No, it's a painting. It's about like Leonardo DiCaprio or whoever painted that, painted Mona Lisa. But point being, she's made the song to try and tell the world about what's happening here. Yeah. So a couple of years pass. And as Britney's personal and professional life got more complicated, to try and tell the world about what's happening here yeah so a couple of years pass and as

britney's personal and professional life got more complicated it felt like any day she could be swapped out so what do you do when the illuminati are gonna swap you out for an identical replica kit you shave your head they can't swap you for a clone if you don't have any hair it's's true. I mean, but what's to stop them from shaving the clone? You know, she was like telling your friend, like, you know, shaving all the... So I'm going to shave off the hair. And then obviously they won't be able to swap me for a clone. Oh, Brittany, what if they shave the clone's head? There's no escape!

I'll just move everywhere, hopping on one foot. The clone is hopping. I can see it in the... As we assumed, this backfired completely. Her manager spun this in the news as her having a mental breakdown and forced her to go into a psychiatric hospital. She doesn't know what she's doing. Oh, she's...

You know that's what Britney's manager sounded like. manager sounded like oh absolutely oh she's lost her mind so she went into the psychiatric hospital and this was the last time we ever saw the real britney spears really alone behind closed doors they made the swap 72 hours later clone britney emerged from the hospital. It's just like in, you know, the movies. Britney Spears emerges, you know, from the hospital just with like a tiny scar in her head. Yeah. Britney, tell us about Mona Lisa. That was not a song. That was nothing.

I don't know what you're talking about. I love my managers. And you know she's British now for some reason. Yeah. They didn't quite get the clone right. They didn't. I don't know what you're talking They didn't quite get the clone right. They didn't. I don't know what you're talking about. She's singing the clone songs like,

I'm poison, I'm going to die soon. Clone Britney went on to take over the career of regular Britney Spears. Later in 2007, Clone Britney released a new album called Blackout. It was filled with pleasant, successful pop music. And it wasn't long before everyone forgot about mona lisa and the strange incident with britney at the radio station it was

simple all they had to do was release another platinum selling number one album yeah called blackout literally blacking out the past the the original people are taking the piss. The original working title was Under the Carpet. It's like the Roswell thing, you know? You let the people of Roswell hold freaking alien festivals now. Because if you tried to shut it down, it would look way conspicuous. That's very true. So the more you build it up into a thing, the less it becomes a real incident. So Blackout obviously was a huge success.

Everyone forgot about this weird track, Mona Lisa, and showing up randomly to play at a radio station. That was until Fake Britney released a new music video for one of her singles off the album called Break the Ice. Have you ever seen the music video for Break the Ice? Never. Break the ice have you ever seen the music video for break the ice never it's an animated music video It depicts herself Britney Spears using a bomb to destroy a cloning Center Shut up. I am being a hundred percent honest It's a video about her finding a cloning Center with Britney Spears is in tubes and she Blows it up and rips the face off of the robotic lizard man who runs it.

This is very confusing because did Britney herself animate this video? Apparently, she worked with someone on the video, but the idea behind it was 100% hers. 100% Britney. Right. Right. Ever since the Hit Me Baby One More Time days days this is what she'd been wanting to bring to the world exactly first it was school girl outfits now it is lizard man cloning centers being bombed right i guess she was always getting a little more intense because it was like

hit me baby one more time you know kind of like badass then it was like toxic now i'm poisoned and i'm a secret agent and now it's literally like i've been cloned i'm gonna bomb a cloning center and kill the lizard in charge her next album will presumably just be her joining isis just with a the baddest chick of all yeah ridiculous and i guess it brings up a lot of questions as to why would clone Britney be making a video about destroying a clone center? That's very interesting. I believe that when the original Britney was cloned, they didn't think that it would carry over all of her thoughts, knowledge, wisdom, power, courage, everything that forms the Triforce. Power, courage, everything that forms the Triforce. Power of the Dolphin.

Everything that old Brittany had. Dragon Talisman. Was carried over to clone Brittany. Right. So all of that hatred for her management and hatred for the duplicating of pop stars was carried over to clone Brittany. Have you ever seen the Judge Dredd movie?

Yes. With Sylvester Stallone? Yes. And there's the moment when they're revealing his past to him oh that's a great moment and he's looking at the portrait of him and his family and then they photoshop style remove the layers to reveal that he never had a family he was born in a government facility of. And he screams into the night air, My whole life has been a lie!

That would be Britney. That was clone Britney. As soon as she walked into this facility and saw hundreds of Britneys. It's a ghost in the shell shit. It's crazy. It's literally the prestige. Do you know how hard it is

for her to go to sleep at night not knowing if she's going to be the Britney on the stage or the Britney who died? I don't remember the prestige. Do you know how hard it is for her to go to sleep at night, not knowing if she's going to be the Britney on the stage or the Britney who died? I don't remember the quote. I haven't seen the movie in a while. The Britney on the stage, the Britney that had her knee smashed in. Now, obviously, there have been a lot of stories

about celebrities that have been cloned. Eminem, Justin Timberlake, Paul McCartney, Avril Lavigne. There's tons of theories about all of these celebrities at one point being swapped out for other celebrities, other impersonators, people coming in to take their place. And in 2015, do you know the rapper B.O.B.? Yeah. Popular guy, couple mil on Twitter.

Absolutely. And a purveyor of the truth exactly i think you're about to bring up in 2015 he tweeted i swear i don't want any attention or money or fame no more just to get the truth out the truth you've been hidden from since birth they basically want to drip feed the truth about human cloning to us as if it's too soon to come but it's been here i'm actually flabbergasted i thought you were going to talk about i mean bob believes the earth's flat so right but that one of us brother no what this no he's a lot of you trying to discredit b.o.b this is a man on the inside, Kit, talking about celebrity cloning. Yeah, this guy's probably been to the Grammys.

I have deep dove. I have psycho dived into the story of celebrity cloning. I have watched a video of Miley Cyrus be replaced by a clone on stage live at a concert. You have to back that up with the video. Do I? Shit. I thought if I said it loud enough you'd just believe me and then if i admitted to it at a high volume that it was a dream you wouldn't notice i just show you episode one of hannah montana where she swaps between Miley Cyrus and Anna Montana like what about that kit

she's got the best of both worlds she gets to relax and take it slow and rock out the show clone Miley Cyrus Miley Cyrus clone I'm just gonna google that's a good way to get some biased information I feel I believe this is when she was performing with the jonas brothers great tour i followed them rind 30 cities no less sold acid in the car park so that's britney there or not britney god damn that's miley there in the pink watch this taken away look comes out. It's a different girl. How do you know that? This is filmed from at least 100 foot away. Look, did you see it?

You can see. So for the audience, she went behind a door and then reemerged from behind a door. Bullshit. She's taken out one door and another girl is legitimately brought on. She's coated out. Another girl emerges unfortunately that is the entirety of my research a grainy video of hannah montana swapping i actually watched a lot of hannah montana as well it was mostly that camp rock high school musical one

two and three i had to make sure that there was no other cloning going on and across hundreds of hours of screen time there was well that was it uh what are your thoughts kit uh you're right this is thank you thanks for listening for this week's episode of this paranormal life you're right that this is a persistent issue in the celebrity community rumors of cloning are abound and as you say they've been applied to lots of different people one of the tricky things about this particular rumor is that it can be used by the artist to leverage even more press success i know whenever another rock star andrew wk was accused of being a clone and being quite literally a different person from his first album to his second album right

being a good clone he could have you know played the role of angela became going all these rumors are absolute nonsense i am of course the same person and uh i will be suing anyone who says otherwise instead he kind of in interviews was like i suppose i am a different person than i was when i started out you know and these kind of cryptic phrases they're like you mean like you've grown as a musician and stuff it's like yes also physically well like you've grown a beard yes but also different genes what the levi's yes but also blood what on the levi's yes but also in me also eye color what the contacts yes yes and additionally with bob i mean it has to be said with bob that these claims about the earth being flat and other such fantastical sort of paranoid conspiracy claims

they conveniently kind of come out around you know new album and single campaigns um true true you're wearing a bob hat so it can be problematic that these are people who live off of rumors. Their entire livelihood is fueled by goddamn TMZ. So if TMZ is running the story that they're clones, hell, it's good for business. Is it? Is it good for business? If people think you're a clone? Back in my day, chord progression sold music, not clone rumors.

I guess the industry's changed a little since. Also, we should start actually running some hardcore clone rumors because guess the industry's changed a little since uh also we should start actually running some hardcore clone rumors because it might shift the single yeah that'd be great or some chompy's for christ's sake but as a principal investigator in this case where do you come down in this one it's tough it's difficult you know i looked into a lot of different cases i looked into britney's case which was insane. This single that was never, ever released on radio, this version of it. Also, what if these celebrities, when they're cloned, don't even know they've been cloned? How many celebrities are out there right now who have been cloned thinking that they're the original?

What if Mona Lisa Britney was a clone? What if the Mona Lisa was a goddamn clone? What if I'm a clone? We need to wrap up this podcast and start investing. I'm freaking the shit out. What if every week at the end of our podcast, we start rambling into territories that we're not supposed to go to. Some MIB agent snipes us both in the head and they put in Rory V20 goddamn three.

Don't you think it's convenient that every single day we go to sleep every single day we black out for an indeterminate amount of time and you wake up and maybe you've got a smartphone and it tells you oh you were out for seven hours buddy you got some really restful sleep have a great day see you again tonight should it say, have a good first day, clone. I wasn't going to bring this up, but there's goddamn holes in my neck when I wake up. As I age, I have gotten fatter. I have gotten older looking physically, and I think I'm being cloned every day into a slightly worse version of myself. I don't know how to stop it because I need sleep.

I tried staying up seven days on end. Somehow, without blacking out, I got older and uglier at rapid speed. They must have wheeled me out and replaced my body in record time. I believe the next experiment is to not blink for as long as possible. Right, because every blink is a micro blackout. You know what? If there's anything that you should take away from this podcast is don't blink. Don't sleep.

That gives them an opening for you to be carted out and put up with compliance bot 2.0. I think regardless of what the answer is to this podcast, if it's a yes or if it's a no, I just want everyone to take away from this. Don't blink. Don't sleep. You'll get replaced. I think that's probably, I know we've got a lot of mottos for the paranormal commune,

but I think this is a new one. In terms of this case with Britney, it is one of the more convincing ones, but I think, you know, this journey of her having this semi breakdown, this rogue album with this strange single on it i think it was more or less probably a cry for help from a struggling musician who was probably surrounded by yes men which is quite sad actually because it in a sense it was a sad song

about feeling like you've been cloned but i think much more of a emotional way she was going through a difficult time and i think she was trying to express that the only way she knows how with music with shitty pop music you know i've been in the music industry it's common knowledge that you know everything you see up on that stage everything you see on the goddamn mtv that's a facade and it's no coincidence that all these artists they they are personas and so what you have here is people taking the duality of the person that is britney spears and the persona that is britney spears and thinking they're literally two different things exactly when the reality is they're just two sides of the same coin. One coin, people.

Which means the clone, which means the coin has not been cloned. Two sides of the same clone. It's a yes. It's a yes from me this week. I think for me this week is going to be a no. It's a no.

Unfortunately. We might come back to another celebrity cloning. I've heard the Avril Lavigne one is very convincing. So we might come back to another celebrity um uh cloning i've heard the uh avril lavigne one is very convincing so we might come back to that one um but thank you so much for listening a conspiracy this week not quite paranormal but very suspicious let us know what you guys thought of it maybe we'll do some more and if you want to go a step further and support the podcast we have a patreon where all the proceeds correctly to us no clones just the pockets of kit one and rory one

kit one rory three it's just rory died we had to clone him second one again bit the same electrical wire that rory one did had to replace him me this rory doing fine the wire looks delicious sure but i've learned not to bite it just a nibble though just a nibble real quick right we've been over this cannot do cannot bite it yeah cool later then no uh so if you want to support us you can join the patreon where you can get bonus episodes merchandise research notes loads of fantastic stuff so definitely check that out at patreon forward slash This Paranormal Life. We also have a Facebook group, which you can join and chat with all your friends about cool conspiracy theories and paranormal tales. It is a secret, but just because we like you guys, we'll let you join for a reduced fee.

The fee? Your silence. You get to join. You do have to delete your facebook account permanently 24 hours later but those 24 hours will be some of the most meme worthy of your lives yeah and if you do support us on patreon what we like to do is at the end of every episode give you a little shout out little thank you uh just to show our appreciation for your support that's right thank you to freya wise good to have someone that's actually wise for once uh in our midst wow yeah in my midst sorry because i'm wise obviously

but uh dum-dum over here okay thank you so much you wise wise wizard for contributing to the this paranormal life patreon nothing wiser than that but investing your money in an emerging market the paranormal thank you to nick shields nick the brick he is the rubble in which we build our house brick by brick nick by nick we are able to form this beautiful commune it's people like him that don't mind being cemented down into the dirt you know we we truly stand on the shoulders of giants and live on the foundations of nicks thank you also to george of the jungle or the city just a regular george curious curious that little monkey bastard welcome aboard george here's a banana for good luck and a loaded ak welcome to the commune thank you to jamie try press it i don't know how to pronounce

that jamie i apologize but thank you i always think when the world's in trouble and you're wondering should i drop the nuke your fingers hovering over the button you should try and press it i was so worried about making the button you should try and press it I was so worried about making the pun I don't really know what I was talking about nuking the world yeah don't do that don't do that Jamie that's a bad idea too late oh shit he's a guy he actually lives on like a nuclear base he had his finger hovered over the thing his arms arms are so long, he can reach both keys. Goldeneye keys ready.

Thank you also to Kirby Bondi. Kirby, we heard you suck. That's right. Like the little pink ball of shit. I really hope he knows who Kirby is or else that's going to sound really bad. He has to. Thank you so much for contributing to the patreon kirby uh please do not suck me up and duplicate me like a weird clone um but i hope you

enjoyed this episode and enjoy the future episodes thank you also to sam mulholland wham bam thank you sam get inside my paranormal. Couldn't think of a rhyme there, but does that make the song any less valid? Slightly, yes, it does, because it didn't rhyme. But regardless, thank you so much for contributing to the This Paranormal Life Patreon. We are in your debt. Thank you to Charlie Sainsbury. Charlie Sainsbury's? How's that for a meal deal?

I prefer Tesco, personally, but Sainsbury's got those ba-ba-ba bags for life. That's right. Those ba-ba-ba bags are deep enough to hold all the pennies we need for the This Paranormal Life Patreon. I don't think any of those sentences really made sense, but we're rolling with it now. I'm on fire. Put me out. I'm in pain. Trying to thank you to william hart william tried so hard and got so fart but in the end it didn't even murder

thank you thank you thank you and thank you to everyone who supported us on patreon thus far if you hadn't heard your name thus far that just means it's coming your shout out is coming we thank you for your support and we are just getting there so thanks for being patient and bearing with us i hope you all have enjoyed this week's episode um let us know what you think at this paranormal life podcast at gmail.com otherwise we will see you on tuesday for a brand new paranormal tale boom