This Paranormal Life - #132 Ape Canyon Part 2: The Hunt for Telepathic Ape-Men
Episode Date: October 1, 2019The second and final chapter in the mystery of Ape Canyon. As time passes, government agents enter the scene, and a skier mysteriously goes missing in the same area that the ape-men were spotted. Is i...t coincidence or definitively paranormal?Support us on Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife to get access to weekly bonus episodes!Buy Official TPL Merch! - thisparanormallife.com/storeFollow us on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTubeJoin our Secret Society Facebook CommunityIntro music by www.purple-planet.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Last time on This Paranormal Life
They saw something they didn't expect.
Four giant animals walking upright.
Indians have told of the mountain devils for over 60 years.
People are wondering, is it even safe for anyone to be around Mount St. Helens anymore?
But as days pass, Henry is in the woods. People are wondering, is it even safe for anyone to be around Mount St. Helens anymore?
But as days pass, Henry is in the woods.
Henry said,
It was at twilight when I came across an animal.
A huge bear.
But as soon as I lifted my gun to my shoulder and aimed it at him,
it turned to me and said,
Stop! stop welcome back to part two of this paranormal life's investigation into the mountain devils of
mount saint helens washington any everything's to play for here guys we don't know what direction
this is going to go in is it going to be a yes and no is it going to turn out to be
scooby-doo style the owner of the woods itself in an outfit we don't know who was i think
president reagan or some shit right yeah it's all to play for i don't personally know and that's why
we're going to cut to a live stream of the forest right now so empty you're like i don't personally
know rory personally doesn't care let's go into today's episode so if you haven't gathered by
now folks if you're tuning
in and this is your first experience of the mountain devils of mount st helens probably
worth checking out episode one that was last week um we're gonna pick up right where we left off
so last time we followed the tale of fred beck and his friends and fellow gold prospectors
trekking in the wilderness surrounding mount st. Helens, Washington in 1924.
They stumbled across a group of cryptids, some sort of Sasquatch-like beasts that stalk the
forest, and after Fred shot one, later that night they exacted their revenge, attacking the men in
their own cabin. Once this got to local press, witnesses started coming forward saying that they too had seen the beasts, calling them
the Seatic tribe. And one Henry Napoleon had an absolutely extraordinary story. Last week,
we ended right as this cryptid turned to him and spoke. Now, Mr. Henry Napoleon confirmed that
this creature in front of him was exactly as described by Fred Beck and his company.
Huge, covered in black hair and around seven feet tall.
Henry said that the Seatic spoke to him and asked him to sit down
and explained how he had sensed him coming psychically
and that his mind had been projected to his distant relatives somehow.
Right, because these are cryptids, but they also, from the information we gathered in episode one,
they possess some sort of psychic capabilities.
Is that right?
I think I went online and said wizards, but I think that might have been a step too far.
Sure.
I think they just have sort of, they can hypnotize people, is that right?
Exactly right, well remembered.
I think they just have sort of... they can hypnotize people, is that right? Exactly right, well remembered.
Um, they have the power to hunt their prey, things like deers and elk presumably,
through the power of hypnotism.
Which is weird because they're seven foot and jacked as shit,
but somehow they use Derek Brown level intrigue...
Yeah.
...to kill their prey.
They don't need that, that's insane.
I feel like if you're like a bodybuilder, you also don't need mind control capabilities.
Yeah.
You're already pretty strong.
You could just punch someone in the nose and kill them.
It's like a military general using card tricks to distract the enemy before nuking them.
Yeah, it's completely redundant.
It's like a pretty cool party trick, but it's definitely not necessary.
It's like the world's number one
ufc fighter also having knives for hands it's like he's already pretty strong and he's a really good
fighter he doesn't need knife hands sure they help in the ufc fighting i'm just imagining the
knife hands trained uh ufc martial artist being like sensei i want to sit my black belt uh and
get get my jiu-jitsu black belt and he's like you don't need it bro you've killed everyone in the
league not using jiu-jitsu by the way those chokeholds didn't do much good you took one
right hook and slit their throats every one of them our chokehold just stabs them it doesn't
work by the way even if i gave you the belt you're not gonna be able to put it on you're gonna chop it up buddy it's
basically edward scissorhands trying to learn martial arts henry said that after they talked
for some time he was invited into the sietic home he said quote though it was now dark the sietic
followed the trail very easily you You got night vision too?
Of course.
Night vision, mind control, knife hands and a monkey body.
It's the ultimate killer.
They are the super soldiers of the future.
The military need to harness this technology.
People didn't realize Captain America was actually a f***ing failure.
He didn't have any knife hands.
He didn't even look like a monkey.
He was just a jacked man
uh master chief john 117 from the popular series halo was actually based on the ape man of mine
st helens because these things with plasma grenades could borderline take over an entire galaxy 100
then the trail started going underground and And after hours of travel, which is miles traveling underground,
we came to a large cave, which he said was the home of his people.
And that during winter, they lived in different caves dotted around the Northwest.
He specifically mentioned Vancouver Island.
Apparently there's a bunch of these caves on Vancouver Island, which is pretty interesting.
So I guess if you live in a cave miles underground, you're going
to need the night vision. Yeah, that makes sense. While visiting the Seatic underground
lair, he learned much about their way of life. For example, that they can apparently speak
basically any language of the Northwest Native American tribes, and that they only travel
at night.
And one of my favourite pieces of information was when Henry asked them why almost no one
had ever seen them.
I mean, even if they do only travel at night, how could they have gone more or less unnoticed
this entire time?
And they explained that they have a special plant medicine.
If you thought they were f***ing powerful, wait for this.
They have a plant that they rub all over their bodies, making them invisible.
No!
And that, combined with the power of hypnotism, makes them the deadliest hunters of all.
Are you serious?
I don't know if he means, like, invisibility cloak Harry Potter style invisible, or if he means, like, this is a camouflage.
Rambo style, I've got mud on my face.
Yes.
That sort of thing yeah it could be
it could be interpreted interpreted as either one to be fair yeah and i mean they could demonstrate
this to henry in the underground cave and he wouldn't know what the f**k was going on he can't
see two feet in front of him yeah it's like them saying we have a special um plant we eat that
helps us see perfectly in the night and they're all just eating carrots right and
that's you know that's just a bit of lost in translation comment there because you know that's
is that a that's is that a true fact or is that like an old wives you didn't make that up no that's
real that's okay vitamin a and carrots is for eyesight right sure so that can help we have a
plant that makes us go invisible they rub mud on themselves so there's a lot of things like this
that would be interesting to really get to the bottom of what they're talking about i mean if they have like a radish that
allows them to time travel okay then that's that's definitely i think paranormal time travel radishes
we got the psycho dive potatoes do you have anything that doesn't have some sort of paranormal consequence? Nope.
Yours is f***ing astral projection candy.
You'd be really disappointed if you try one of the time travel radishes and it's just them all eating a radish and then having a nap
going eight hours into the future.
It's like, okay, so actually that one wasn't paranormal either.
But like we said, this is immediately way more paranormal
than even Fred Beck first imagined.
At first, we thought these might have been some kind of cryptid, some undiscovered species that went violent on Fred.
But according to Henry, they are psychic and invisible.
But Henry also learned a crucial piece of information that would make a little more sense of what happened to Fred and his company in the woods.
information that would make a little more sense of what happened to Fred and his company in the woods.
While the SeaTik are secretive and peaceful and almost never seen by humans,
they do have a code, a mafia-style rulebook. Henry was told that if a human
injures or kills one of their people, they will, quote, generally take 12 lives in exchange for one.
Whoa.
Which immediately accounts for the whole trying to murder everyone with boulders thing.
Right.
Okay, that makes sense.
I just love how casual that is.
Generally, we will murder 12 humans.
Generally speaking.
I guess they've worked out the worth of one of their lives in human lives so they're like humans can't
have a pretty low opinion of humans i guess so apparently i guess like humans can't turn invisible
they can't see in the dark yeah they're actually pretty squidgy pretty scrawny so sure i'm jacked
as hell like i'm basically an invisible night wizard yeah so i am worth at least 12 humans i think that's a fair assumption i'm willing to
buy to our new ape overlords and this is apparently why the northwestern tribes know not to with them
even when they apparently regularly steal all their dried meat salmon and as we discussed before
sometimes women they know that retaliation means instant death they have to take about 14 of them
though because a human wife is not the same as a a giant invisible night monkey wife they are the
victorious secret models of the ape man i swear to. All of them have Instagram followers over a mil.
They're doing promotional work for hashtag time travel radish.
They're plugging all the hottest products.
I would love to see an ape man social media platform.
What does that look like for night wizard apes?
Well, first off, all the photos that are uploaded are just pitch black.
Of course.
We can't see anything, but it's actually pretty tasteful nudes under there.
And look, I realize that we're basing pretty much all of our sciatic lore on the words of Mr. Henry Napoleon right now.
And granted, he's making some pretty wild claims about these creatures.
But the Oregonian reported that there are actual witnesses to attacks by these
creatures. In 1924, one L. Peter James and his mother, Mrs. James, of the Duwamish tribe
spoke to the Oregonian. They said, quote,
They took our young men like toys, turning them upside down and ripping them in two like
a piece of calico. Jesus! Never again did the Duwamish
tribe seek revenge when their women and babies were stolen. Oh my god! Which is absolutely insane
that what Henry Napoleon is saying isn't just similar to other stories we've heard like folklore
but it's literally being described to the press by men and women from other tribes.
This woman is saying that her people were ripped apart.
Yeah, I knew these night monkeys were strong,
but I didn't realize they could just pull humans apart.
I saw on one forum where people were discussing this,
kind of in the last couple years,
someone was like,
I mean, I know they're like seven or eight foot tall and built like night beasts but he was
like does the physics work that if you just pull hang someone upside down and pull their head
downwards would that rip their head off yeah and i think everyone was like no if you're shack and
you're eight foot tall no yeah but i guess if you what if you if you were holding someone upside down and you
went like leg leg apart like down the middle like splitting down the middle would that work it's
really the least of our concerns when they have hypnotism and invisibility i we just have to
assume they're super powerful as well okay that's fair enough yeah you don't ask harry potter if
there's a spell that can cut a human in half. He's already a wizard.
Just assume it exists.
Just assume it exists.
And don't ask.
Yeah.
Because if you ask him and he says it out loud,
you might be on the receiving end of that bad boy.
And whilst I personally know almost nothing about these particular nations,
I did watch a movie about a murder in a remote native reservation once.
And I think that if we're going back decades
before 1924 potentially into the 1800s it is entirely possible that crazy stuff went on that
never made the attention of the united states authorities right because we like to think that
if this happened even in 1800s new york that the police are going to know about it's going to be like a report
yeah yeah but these reservations if they were kind of left to their own left to govern themselves
left to decide what goes on in their own reservation stuff might go on that didn't
get reported to the outside that's very true so it is possible that this happened and then just
decades later mrs james was like, oh, yeah, absolutely.
My son was ripped apart by a night beast.
Yeah.
Now, it goes without saying that if the state newspaper is printing this kind of stuff every day, people are freaking out.
Can you imagine?
Like, do you remember, for example, a number of years back, it was all over UK press that farmers around the UK were seeing panthers in the countryside i do remember
this yeah it's kind of a weird back of the brain memory isn't it yeah but the uk press blew up a
while ago with big cats sighted all over the uk and it was a weird kind of mass hysteria time
where i don't think there was ever any evidence of panthers being found in northern ireland or wales but everyone kind of
believed it and farmers were telling the press with a straight face i saw two tigers you know
rip apart a sheep last night of course yeah those things really get it's very easy when a news story
that exciting uh picks up attention and spreads like wildfire. It's like when that person in Florida had all
those bath salts and ate another man's face. And everyone was like, well, this is it. It's
the zombie apocalypse. It's happening right now. This is the first case on TV and it's all going
to kick off from here. And it's so funny the way different countries report on the same story or how they can be reported differently.
Because I only realized a few years later that around the same time in the UK, there was a big surge in legal highs.
And that's what everyone was worried about.
Chinese designer drugs coming to the UK, technically legal, being taken by teens all around the uk right order it online
and take it um i only found out years later that's what bath salts was and that this thing in america
that they were like oh you take bath salts you're gonna eat someone's face that was the same literal
same drugs that people in the uk were partying on that's what yeah oh my god yeah oh that's scary yeah good lord what a terrible
poster for that drug because you know like ease you know you'll have maybe like a bit of a weird
experience see some crazy stuff i don't know smoke some weed and it'll chill you out maybe
try some bath salts and uh people's faces just start looking real good. Real juicy sirloins walking around talking to you.
It just looks like a KFC crunch box in the place of eyes.
Little chicken dippers.
A whole new meaning to the term raging face.
People basically look like their faces just become those potato smiley faces on a human body.
So, you know, any normal time during the week or during the day, you don't really fancy them.
But at 3 a.m. on a Friday night.
Oh, yeah. When you had a little bit to drink and a little bit of bath salts craving it.
But yeah, like I say, so imagine the papers were reporting invisible cryptids that steal women and have a kind of Bloods vs. Crypts attitude towards revenge killings.
That obviously sent people into a frenzy.
Yeah.
So the local authorities had no choice but to investigate and intervene.
Put it this way, it was the United States Forest Service who jumped in.
Who, in terms of authority, I think are somewhere between CIA agents and the park ranger from yogi bear right that's sweet spot it's quite a gray
area because a lot of the time they're just working with plants but occasionally they get
uh shipped in to gun down a horde of sasquatch of course you have to be equipped for all
eventualities because you can kill a plant it's easy to do that sure no one says a word there's not little narc plants ratting you out
you can go around and just cut a branch and no one's gonna say shit yeah you don't get like a
price on your head no taking out some weeds you don't have to sleep in fear every night that vines
will wrap your body and kill you enacting some sort of vegetating revenge i mean they might
i feel like if you talk to a forest ranger they'd be like everyone thinks it's all picnics and fun
and games out here it's a war zone let me tell you he just shows you like a nettle sting on his arm
got this one in 08 that should have healed by now why has has that not healed? I don't eat any vegetables. I don't trust them.
Probably why it hasn't healed then.
It's like, what do you eat?
Meat?
Meat plants that can talk?
I don't think so.
Guess what cows eat, dumbass.
It's like, first off, don't call me a dumbass.
How did you get this job in the first place?
Job?
I was born in the woods.
I don't eat vegetables.
I don't eat meat i live clean off sweet delicious chinese pharmaceuticals the very same the very same mr potato head
like i say it maybe doesn't sound ideal to have the forest service on this but hey they know the
forest best right and they are the guys for the job whether we like it or not so rangers jh huffman
and william welsh hiked into the forest with fred beck the same prospector who originally shot the
mystery ape man and was knocked out by their boulders which by the way seems like an incredibly
risky idea given that we've just learned that they'll kill 12 people in exchange for one of them. So this is a bit like
sending a bunny into an alligator enclosure. Exactly. These ape men are just pounding their
fist waiting for Fred to come back into the forest. It's true. So they hike through the
wilderness and Beck takes them to the cliff where he first shot the ape man.
And where it, unprovoked by the way, I think we've established they didn't do anything.
No.
And where it supposedly fell off the edge into the canyon. Now right off the bat, despite Fred describing the canyon as quote, inaccessible,
one ranger easily scrambled down into it and found nothing there.
Okay, not a good start.
No body, no ape-man wallet with a photo ID,
no ape-man gravestone where he might have been buried.
Of course.
Nothing.
But hey, we don't know the rituals of this tribe.
The night beast could have come the following day,
retrieved the body,
given it some sort of ceremonial passage onto the next life.
We don't know what they do.
This is Fred back talking to the rangers.
They're walking away.
Hey, guys.
In my defense, I think I heard they eat the bones of the dead to leave no evidence.
I think when he fell off the edge, I heard the others say, yum.
Actually, in hindsight, I might have just nicked him.
I think he actually got away with the other guys.
Like you say, maybe the ape man recovered the body, took it away,
no biggie. So instead, Fred took them to the site of the camp where the boulders had been thrown at
them, the place he almost died. But the rangers simply weren't buying it. They turned to each
other and were like, this looks a lot more like the prospectors just move these boulders here after the fact
but why would they falsify it and not only that but even fred's silver bullet evidence the alleged
footprints of the eight men in the dirt he showed them to the rangers and they basically believed
he just made them with his own hands a bit like whenever you're at primary school and you make like oh baby feet with your with your with your the bottom of your fists yeah yeah no i feel a
bit conflicted about that because it's easy to make baby feet i don't know if you can make like
bigfoot feet yeah because you have to you you especially in soil know, because you need to get the depth right.
Yeah.
In correlation with the weight of the creature.
But then maybe that's what's off here.
Maybe that's why they're not buying it.
It's hard to say.
I guess it does... They're casting doubt on it.
I'd love it if he went and showed it to them and it was just baby feet.
He'd done the baby feet imprints with his hands.
I didn't say they had big feet.
They're just eight foot tall. And so a frustrated Fred Beck and the rangers returned to town
and immediately they broke this news to the press, supposedly blowing Fred's story out of the water.
The story they had been running for weeks at this point. This was the only story in town.
Oh boy. For some, this confirmed their
suspicions that the prospectors were liars, that it all never happened. But for others,
there was now a trail of witnesses at this point. The Native American accounts that
together was too convincing a picture for two rangers to just brush off as falsified evidence.
It had become arguably bigger than Fred back at this point.
At least it's interesting now we know
that the Forest Rangers are goddamn MIB narcs.
I didn't want to say it, but what was their-
Fred brought them out there.
What was their f***ing names?
I'm going to call them out right here.
J.H. Huffman and William Welsh.
Unbelievable.
Those are some government names
if I've ever heard them before.
Real name, Agent Smith, an agent.
And Michael in black.
These guys went out with Fred to cover their asses.
Fred was like, oh, no one can make it down into this ravine.
Probably Michael in black calls in a chopper.
Yeah.
Goes down on a rope.
Yeah.
Kicks this monkey skeleton into a hole
and says there's nothing here they go check out the boulders they put fred's fingerprints all
over him say oh fred's fingerprints are on the boulders they're probably covering up the real
tracks and leaving baby feet behind there was probably a goddamn mayan temple to an ape god with all sorts of glowing runes all over it.
Which they said, bring in the bulldozers.
Exactly.
They've used Photoshop to make it look like a Burger King.
Fred's on his way out of the forest and he's like, I don't remember having all this whiskey on me when I entered the forest.
They're planting shit on him.
Bath salts.
Booze.
Yeah.
I know what's happening here. We both know what's happening here we both know what's happening here it's fine did i mention michael in black is eight feet tall
hair is all hell baby feet but completely invisible how are they on the inside
they turn to fred they're like you know what fred i don't think this story is real
and you're never gonna to see us again.
They start applying mud to themselves.
He's like, I can still see you.
You're not invisible.
I love the idea of Fred sending down one of these monkey MIB agents to look for the body.
And Fred's like, is there anything down there?
And he's just down there, like, looking down at his friend, wiping a tear away.
No, there's nothing here rest in
peace brother the world will not know our secret yet working for the cia for their own people
brother he closes his little skeleton monkey eyelids i know you never trusted my ways but i'm gonna
keep our tribe safe but the main thing is this information was not out there whether the rangers
believed it or not and this story became wildly popular causing this area to be known as ape
canyon and it was influential in the kind of bigfoot sasquatch phenomenon as a rare piece
of first-hand evidence and this is something we haven't miraculously we haven't really brought up
to this point but is the obvious glaring similarities to bigfoot that we just discussed
on episode goddamn one right so is the implication here that Bigfoot is in fact simply one of the creatures in this tribe?
Absolutely. I mean, the similarities are, to name a few, their location in the Pacific Northwest,
in these forested areas, almost never seen, seven to eight foot tall apes that are largely secretive,
but can turn violent, not even getting into the discussion of supernatural
abilities which is rumored about the bigfoot and then crucially as well the native american
accounts that they seem to have a long and storied history with them to the point where they have a
tribal name for them yeah i i don't necessarily know how many if any there are links between
uh native american cultures and bigfoot yeah is there
any direct correlation between those two things yeah i mean they i don't know how much we talked
about on episode one because we weren't doing a great job in the old research but uh it turns out
by the way you watch your goddamn mouth because that was the first episode and i actually researched
that really hard okay we didn't come up with the fact that Native Americans have known about the Sasquatch for millennia.
Well, I had an interview with a man who punched Bigfoot.
That's a pretty intimate knowledge of how the beast works.
Okay, well, you didn't get to the woman whose son was ripped apart by a Sasquatch.
That came later, I think, or earlier.
I don't know.
But I did a pretty good goddamn job at that all right i think we came up on a
no at the end of that episode sure that wasn't those convincing evidence but there was evidence
galore it just all turned out to be bullshit i think you now agree with me that the evidence
was bad there was just a lot of it is what you're trying to tell me? Was the episode good? No.
Was the research? But it was long.
It was incredibly long and dull.
Was the research good?
No.
Did it make any sense?
Barely.
But did it get uploaded?
Yes.
And I rest my case, sir.
Is it on iTunes to this day?
Getting one star review after one star review.
Of course.
From the MIBs.
Despite there being more one star reviews than there could possibly be men in black in the world.
Thousands.
Some of them have double accounts.
I know it.
But despite all this renewed interest in the ape men and the Siotic Tribe as described by the Native
Americans, it would be several decades later until new evidence would shine new light onto
what went on that day in Mt. St. Helens, 1924. In August 1963, a new headline hit newsstands
around Oregon and Washington titled, Ape Canyon Holds Unsolved
Mystery. It covered the recent disappearance of a skier, Jim Carter, and interviewed an experienced
and well-known local mountaineer, Bob Lee, about what happened and the search effort for Jim.
He said, on the way down the mountain, Jim left the other climbers at a landmark called Dog's
Head at the 8,000 foot level. He told them he would ski around the left and take a picture of
the group as they skied down the mountain. But that was the last anyone saw of Carter. The next
morning, they launched a search party trying to retrace his footsteps. Firstly, they found a discarded film box at the point where he had taken the picture.
Now, immediately, this might be a little weird for him to just throw his carton of film onto the mountainside instead of take it with him.
Yeah.
But, hey, maybe he's a litterbug. It's not the craziest thing to ever happen.
Maybe you forgot, but Bob explained.
Maybe he's a litterbug? It's not the craziest thing to ever happen. Maybe you forgot, but Bob explained.
From here, Jim evidently took off down the mountain in a wild, death-defying dash,
taking chances that no skier of his caliber would take unless something was terribly wrong, or he was being pursued.
Uh-oh. He jumped over two or three large crevices and evidently was going like the devil.
And when Jim Carter's tracks reached the precipitous sides of Ape Canyon, the search
team were amazed to see that Carter had been in such a hurry that he went right down the
steep canyon walls.
But they didn't find him at the bottom.
We combed the canyon, one end to the other, for five full days.
Sometimes there were as many as 75 people in the search party.
Oh my gosh.
But nothing.
And after two weeks, the search was called off.
Carter's complete disappearance is an unsolved mystery to this day.
Dr. Otto Trott, Lee Stark, and I finally came to the conclusion that the apes got him.
Great conclusion.
Pretty weird. Did they ever develop the photographs was there did he take any pictures from the roll that was uh recovered so
they didn't get the roll i think i think they got the carton that the roll was in oh damn yeah that
would have been kind of interesting yeah to see what was going on the first photo oh nice
picturesque scene of the sunset.
Oh, there's the skiers going down the mountain.
Holy shit!
Is that an army of ape men?
And then just photo after photo taken by the ape men of them raging at night.
Yeah.
Really messy selfies as well.
They obviously were just trying to take them themselves.
This is really interesting.
Very.
You know, we've covered a couple cases in the past
where people have been by themselves and made uh irrational decisions yes uh where the only
conclusion is that they were being pursued yes by someone um and hell if you're being pursued
by someone on ape canyon there's only one answer people it's the it's the night beast either
the canyon or the ape and the canyon can't move so it's the goddamn ape as far as i know but you'll
have to tune in next week where we investigate the canyon in part three these rocks are borderline
invisible and hypnotic uh okay all right so this is the most recent case of um someone going missing
on ape canyon as far as i'm aware yeah i mean there's basically a couple things that line up
there the fact that he actually skied right to the edge arguably chased to the edge of ape canyon
where a bit like the original ape that fred beck shot went over the
edge and was never seen again right very bizarre stuff not to find a trace of evidence not even a
goddamn ski boot yeah you know like where did all the equipment go how how proficient is this guy
in skiing was that established i think pretty damn proficient i think that i think the idea
idea here is that bob lee and and jim and their accomplices were um basically mountaineers they
were climbing up potentially even to kind of off-piste stuff that isn't skied regularly right
and skiing down the side that's the that's the impression i gathered um and i think he mentions there that
the kind of risks jim was taking he says a skier of his caliber would never take those you'd be
smart enough to know yeah he was jumping crevices which an amateur skier could never do no i've been
skiing before when i was like 15 or 16 in germany and um i was going down a hill that was a little little too steep for me
and an ape indeed did start chasing me of course yes that's why they call a black runs named after
the hair of the beast but i uh you know things got a little out of control i started picking
up a bit too much speed you're trying to do the pizza to slow down fries but that just becomes a gnarly james bond ice spray because you're going
too fast um and i i essentially accelerated to almost the speed of light oh and went straight
into a german family wow um and when i hit that german family, I exploded. Skis went flying.
My poles went off into the forest.
One of my gloves shot off.
I basically just fell apart like a Lego man.
Yeah.
So even if this guy did just crash off a freaking canyon.
Yeah.
You think there'd be a boot or something, you know, in the snow.
It's extremely true.
Yeah.
Like same here.
Anytime, whenever I did it as a kid,
whenever you crash, you always feel like your leg is going to twist into some weird position
because of all the weight of the ski.
But those things are basically designed to, at the slightest impact, just pop right off.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, I once, in anticipation for going off a tiny jump, leaned backwards, at which point my shoes popped out of the skis and I fell.
I fell backwards onto the skis like like you're doing that downhill skateboarding where you like lie on the board.
And I shot off the the tiny little bump uh my skis just went flying down and they
don't stop either they land and they go and they go they'll go down the whole mountain and
unbelievably uh unluckily the same german family were limping from the a and e across the bottom
of the slope and got taken out instantaneously a renegade ski went straight through the child's torso it was impaled
immediately it was very unfortunate it would be fantastic if there had been you know multiple
paranormal search parties going to this location because we've arguably got two bodies out there
somewhere there should be some remnants after all this time of either the skis or one of the bodies
even if they had been taken away by ape men that
shit doesn't uh like biodegrade there should be some evidence somewhere unfortunately as i'm sure
some of our north american listeners will know mount st helens blew the up in 1980 because it's
a volcano what it turns out yeah it was i think the most destructive volcano eruption in north american
modern history were they skiing on lava what is going on on this canyon uh i'll show you a picture
because as europeans uh well you're american but you know what i mean we live here we did we kind
of missed this it was before our lifetimes um i didn't realize it was a big ass
explosion i didn't know that there were any active volcanoes still in like mainland us oh yeah baby
when yellowstone blows you're gonna want a bunker okay we all goes that's what they all say much
you can freak yourself out if you watch a documentary about the yellowstone is so dangerous
it's not even a volcano it's like a super caldera it's like a 20 mile wide volcano if that thing
that thing goes every get me fired up you're getting very you're being a volcano
that thing explodes something like every two million years and we're due another one and when
it goes it wipes out about 90 of shit on earth is that true yes how that's terrifying that's like
i can't even think about that that's like the sun you can't think about it or look directly at it or
your brain will melt like why do you think there's all those cool uh hot springs hot springs hot springs
and uh geysers and stuff yeah why do you think it's got all those in yellowstone because it's
getting ready to pop that's terrifying i'm gonna show you a before and after shot of
mount st helens to give you a picture of uh what went on okay so these top two images are the before and after of mine st helen okay oh my god
oh my is that what happens when a volcano erupts yeah just the top gets sliced off just exploded
everywhere because in my head it's like the cartoony sort of version where a volcano is
basically like an earth cannon that shoots out lava and it all
rains down yeah it rains down like a much like a geyser this one just blew up like tnt style
completely gone chunks of rock raining for miles that is crazy uh yeah it killed 57 people um 47 apes they don't get counted in the official death count yeah it was unbelievably destructive
obviously i mean there's you can see there's in this image there is millions of trees flattened
pretty much to this day but the surrounding forest was pretty much completely flattened
by the pyroclastic flow
damn yeah i think um you know if you're looking for something to get rid of monkey bones
molten molten lava will pretty much do the trick i know i said the skis weren't biodegradable
they'll degrade in lava they will you're not gonna find them yeah that said pretty exciting
reports in the last few years that one group of paranormal
researchers went to try and find the campsite remnants of fred beck and co and apparently they
found like nails like rusted ass old nails that look like they might have been held to pitch a
tent or something like that um which is quite exciting but let's be real they're not finding
shit under all that. No.
God, those poor monkeys.
It's like when you see videos where they pour liquid metal into an ant's nest.
Jesus.
Yeah.
And then they pull it out and you can see all the little... Oh my God.
That's what happened to these poor monkey bastards.
It's so rude when they do that.
It's horrible, yeah.
Isn't nature amazing?
We get to see the internal.
You killed all of them.
They will never make something that cool again.
It's like I saw a video.
It was kind of like an infomercial from God knows,
maybe like the 1960s or 50s or something like that.
And it was just a video showing people cutting down the great redwoods in california and while it was they were doing it
against uh all of these incredible facts about the redwoods yeah so it was like some of these
trees you see being cut down uh would have been around the time that jesus roamed the earth and it's just
like like this tree's pretty cool because jesus actually blessed it and he said that if this tree
was ever cut down that humanity would also die yeah it's incredibly depressing and that's what
we're seeing here folks monkey lives lost so sadly the real life evidence that could have existed to this day
may have been wiped off the face of planet Earth forever.
But thankfully, there is one remaining source of information in this
that if people do want to check out, they can.
In 1967, a little bit before the eruption,
Fred Beck wrote a 22-page booklet detailing the events and his first-hand experience of the ape
men it's called I fought the ape man of Mount St. Helens fought is probably a strong word for what
he did which was cowardly shoot one of them in the back and get knocked out by one of their rocks
a few hours later as you can see from the front cover it's
very high budget not at all just drawn with a pencil oh wow that's the cover i guess it was
the 60s it's all i didn't even know you could sell something called a pamphlet on amazon i thought it
was just books and ebooks pamphlets were very popular back in the day i don't think people do
enough pamphlets these days well this is the first time i've actually seen a sketch of the creature as
well which is pretty interesting yep it looks worryingly like a man by the way he might have
just shot a man i think he shot a hairy explorer yeah because the the ape man's got a buzz cut
i didn't want to bring it up he said it was head to foot in black hair
didn't speak a word the monkey's got a haircut and a human face
he's borderline wearing a crew neck t-shirt they just need to triple check that there
wasn't a missing persons report on the same day that fred shot the night beast so i didn't bring up the this pamphlet too much because i just don't think it really reveals
that much more than what we already talked about um he does go into quite a lot of detail into
the broader picture of who the ape man could be and he seems to kind of agree that it is the
sasquatch it is the native american folklore beast it is the thing that's seen all over the americas
and he also leans into kind of the psychic and spiritual elements that he believes that these
ape men while not conscious in the same way as humans maybe a bit more like animals that they do have paranormal capabilities okay so that's quite cool however it doesn't give us anything else in the realm of
solid evidence to go on and yet we have to come to a conclusion at the end of this episode whether
all of this shit really happened whether the eight men of mount saint helens are paranormal
and exist that's a big question to ask.
It's tough, isn't it?
We have, we've got a couple good stories of people having encounters with these creatures.
Yeah.
We've got stories from local tribes, Native American tribes, that this is obviously something
that's been, you know, is built into their heritage and their culture.
Yeah.
A lot of them said that
they lived alongside these creatures for many years but again we need to look at the fact that
we don't really have a lot of physical evidence especially when some of these events took place
around the time where you could take photographs i mean what the the skier that went missing
literally had a photograph on his person yeah yeah i mean it arguably yes for that era and
you would hope that in the decades since 1924 when this first started you would hope in those
decades even before the eruption that maybe a photo would have been taken. However, the original events happened pretty damn far back.
Yeah, 1924.
You weren't getting any snaps around then.
No.
Which is part of the frustrating lack of,
despite all these beautiful first-hand accounts and local press coverage,
which is really fantastic,
we don't have pictures, let's say say of those alleged footprints and stuff like that
there's a couple strange events as well like fred shooting the monkey and then not
not checking up to see what it was or anything just just shooting and killing a monkey and then
walking away yeah so he claimed apparently that this canyon was inaccessible, that he obviously looked over the edge and figured it would be too dangerous to go down.
Okay.
Let's assume it's down there.
But then the rangers came along and said, this thing was very accessible.
We scrambled down there pretty easily.
Which again, of course, with night monkey powers, anything is accessible to these guys.
It could have been up.
They probably f***ing levitated down there.
It could have been up on 50 foot redwood and they would scramble up that bad boy and come down with berries.
So it's hard to tell what truly is accessible and whether we can trust these quote unquote forest rangers and their opinion.
We have the local newspaper running a bunch of articles on
it i mean that in the past hasn't proved shit all on this podcast because if we've learned anything
from old-timey newspapers is that they will essentially print anything it was a clickbait
of his day 100 yeah if we've learned anything from the beast of Bladenborough, from the Loch Ness Monster, from any of these cases.
From the Spring Hill Jack, fill in the blank.
Of course.
So it's hard to really nail that down as concrete evidence.
Kit, you were the main investigator in this case.
How strongly do you feel about the possibility of this being something real?
I am conflicted because on the one hand, we have fantastic firsthand evidence.
Because on the one hand, we have fantastic firsthand evidence.
And on this podcast, sometimes it's hard to believe a single source,
the Fred Becks of this world, who have perhaps complicated motives.
This guy is a gold prospector for all we know. He's probably killed a bunch of people in his time.
Oh, yeah.
I've seen there will be blood.
Yeah.
I know what happens.
It's a dark world out there folks of
these kind of lone rangers just wandering the wild west um making up shit so that could be
that could be a problem but i want to believe these stories of these native american peoples
because what do they have to gain from bringing it up? Also, they ain't bringing it up because it's basically codified in their folklore.
People from different tribes, they were all like, yeah, yeah, we've all got a different word for them, but it's all the same thing.
Sietic is just one of the many names for this creature.
However, it troubles me that when you consider this story, almost all of it makes sense.
story almost all of it makes sense first-hand accounts included if you just replace sea tick or sasquatch or bigfoot with big bear yeah unfortunately that jim carter was on the side
of mount st helens skiing down yes was chased over ravine yes chased into the wilderness
yeah by a bear or something something vicious that
absolutely kills and eats every morsel of human available fred could have shot a papa bear with
mama bear and the baby bear running off into the woods and i don't know maybe the thing fell down
the canyon was injured but scrambled away yeah maybe it was uh poached by other scavengers bears will eat other
bears in certain circumstances it's a berry bear world sorry no i meant to say bear eat berries
world these are vegetarian bears of course sorry even in the native american accounts it is possible
that through their anthropological history it's built into their folklore a fear of these massive natural
predators that absolutely would have threatened their communities that those are built into the
folklore they gave them a name and that they talk about them to this day as if they are the sasquatch
something exceptional but really they might just be a known species yeah it's like understanding
that threat and framing it through your culture and your worldview all of a sudden a yeah it's like understanding that threat and framing it through your culture
and your worldview all of a sudden a bear that's just a threat to every human becomes a creature
that lives in the woods and has powers because it killed a bunch of people once and is very strong
and i mean it does trouble me that they are pretty specific like they actually call them a tribe you
know it's not even it's not just
an animal to them yeah well at one point they spoke english as well well they spoke the language
of that particular um i think it was like the duwamish tribe they know all those native american
languages apparently and that's why they call them the tribes people um but they do specify
they're not animals they're not humans there's something in between so that is troubling but like i said there's a little bit of doubt being cast
also in terms of the theories being offered up from different sources i did think it was worth
mentioning one explanation for what could have happened on that fateful day with fred beck
and let's say that thing was a bear okay maybe it was some natural
thing but what about the boulders where did the boulders come from of course because bears ain't
doing revenge killings with boulders no no no no well one source claimed that for many years prior
to the eruption of mount st helens you're not gonna believe this apparently
boys from the local ymca camp would hike regularly around mount st helens and one of the things they
would do as tradition don't you dare say throw rocks over the god damn it by the way not not
boulders not even rocks but pumice stones i don't know if you know what type of rock that is, but it's the lightest rock there is.
I think it literally floats in water.
It's a very unique type of rock.
Good God.
And this person argued that, of course, when the miners looked up in the middle of the night,
they saw the shadowy silhouettes of beasts throwing rocks off the cliff edge onto the camp
and apparently the canyon itself would have like shifted the sound of the boys like cries and yells
right that they thought they were getting wailed on by ape men oh yeah you ever heard even if it's
a light rock you ever heard light rock on like a tin roof it sounds like a cannon's gone off it's true it's crazy so
that mixed with little boy monkey screams and and echoing around this huge canyon it's gonna sound
like a nightmare so arguably i should have left that to laugh for conclusions because that casts
a little more doubt in the whole thing yeah but r But, Rory, we have to come to a conclusion. What are you saying? Yay or nay?
Is this truly paranormal or not?
This case is just two
bananas for me.
It's gonna be a no this week, unfortunately.
Damn it. I gotta say,
I was pretty much
on the fence. Like, if you had
gone on with a yes, I probably would have been on board.
You just blasted the story
and the conclusions for the last five minutes.
You said there were boys in the woods throwing boulders.
But the rest of that shit, we're talking about people being ripped apart.
Look, you have me for the whole freaking story.
If there's anyone in this world that's going to believe a paranormal story involving gorilla men, it's this guy.
Don't you dare bring that story up i just feel like it's the perfect time to finally talk about the story no goddamn way but i guess
it's conclusions it is right it is there's absolutely no time as much as it might turn
this into a yes it's not worth it i think today it's a double no folks we're not convinced this
is not listen there's a ton
as we know ton of sasquatch experiences ton of bigfoot experiences out there but when it comes
to the eight man of mount st helens in washington it's a no it's a double no folks i would love
though because i'm i'm i'm on the fence if people out there have seen the beast if people out there
know stories if they're from oregon or Washington, they remember some of this stuff,
please email us in at thisparanormallifepodcast at gmail.com.
I got pretty invested in this one.
Hopefully you guys did too.
If you've been to Monkey Eden
and sampled the time travel radish,
please just send us a slice.
Travel back in time
because you're presumably in the future somewhere.
And save us from doing this two-parter. Hope you guys enjoyed this week's story. a slice travel back in time because you're presumably in the future somewhere and save
us from doing this two-parter hope you guys enjoyed this week's story if you can't get
enough of this paranormal life you just need more this paranormal life in your life head on over to
patreon.com forward slash this paranormal life where from five bucks a month five bucks five bucks access to a treasure trove a monkey
it's very distracting i feel like i'm in the canyon getting chased i'm just trying to add
a bit of emphasis to the point i'm canyon canyon
take that you son of a bitch see i'm just trying to do like a bit of
because sometimes the patreon plugs
are a bit boring and it's right it becomes a bit like mechanical ape man no just some sound effects
and things to keep people interested okay well because people tune out i think when they hear
patreon i think yeah jesus i thought it was pretty exciting anyway i'll keep going try and keep it to
a minimum i don't want to get too distracted it's fine we're gonna wrap up dot com forward slash
this paranormal life this paranormal life don't be lighter than me like just
then you need to think backing vocals well then you need to speak up
because i'm gonna speak my normal voice all right it's fine but don't be upset
well don't be upset if i'm not upset i'm not upset yet like just if you don't i'll keep i'll
keep it down i'll do i'll do whispers or something
there's a treasure trove of bonus episodes we've been making for over a year at this point so
there's a ton of them load in last month's episode we investigated whether the world
ended in 2012 something we all have been thinking about i bet ever since that date did it end in 2012 nice additionally from 20 bucks you can get
your hands on the official uniform of this this paranormal life give me that shirt you're pissing
shit i don't understand how this is adding to the experience at all it's just background noise
it's very much the foreground you're leaning into the mic as far as you possibly can i just want to make
sure it's coming through okay yeah because you're talking you're you're just you're sitting with
headphones in i can tell you're talking so much and i feel like people aren't even going to hear
what i'm trying to say as well just is this about me do it getting to do the pitch because yeah you
see i actually wanted to do the pitch this week i wanted to talk about you could have just said well fine let me do it then okay go so
so um patreon.com for slash is paranormal life already said all that but like for
from a little bit of money from your wallet every month yeah giving them putting the money in a
online and giving it to us it means that every week you get access to a monthly episode of the show this paranormal life it's a
bonus episode that's not one of the regular ones you know there's a reason i did this from five
bucks a month that was the reward i've already said that shit from twenty dollars a month, you get access to a t-shirt.
Access to a t-shirt, do you?
Is it in a lockbox?
$20 a month,
you get access to a monthly t-shirt
that is sent...
No, you don't get a monthly t-shirt.
Sent once in one month
of the whole 12 months
and you never get it again.
Okay, so why mention the 12 months
it's a bargain and you be and if you're trying to sell people at something don't use the words
never get it again it's a bargain and not to be too crass but you're a moron if you don't do wow
okay well i'm glad we got both of those pitches in the can. Yeah. We can edit those together.
Sure.
Cammy, just pick whichever one flowed better.
If you think Kit's, fine.
If you think mine, obviously, sure.
That's fine, too.
If you want to keep them both in, that's a double pitch for the Patreon.
That's a bad idea.
We'll see numbers just jump.
Probably not.
It's going to be great.
And at the end...
Do you want me to do the shout-outs?
Fine.
At the end of every week's episode,
towards the end,
we like to thank everyone
that was smart enough
to invest in the Patreon
where you can get all of these rewards
for the show.
So, muchos gracias to...
Yeah, muchos gracias.
Thanks. Ciao.
Thank you.
Thank you to Zachary. if it isn't zach attack
the dude is always packing a snack if you're gonna go on any nighttime monkey adventures you
want to bring zach he's got it all dairy lunchables um fruit roll-ups just snacks for children mostly
snacks for children but adults can eat them.
I think the problem with that, Zach, is that those are ape-man delicacies.
And you do not want to track them.
Of course.
You want to eat things that repel apes, such as... They can't stand rice, Zach.
So you're going to want to pack as much rice as you can possibly fit in that backpack.
You don't even have room for a bag or container of any kind just get plain old white rice and fill up the backpack to the brim
yeah but you said you didn't have room for a backpack i was gonna hold the rice in the palm
of your hand have a grain a day until you find the beast thanks also to lee jackson lee jackson
is relaxing this guy kicks it harder than anyone I know. You ever hear
the term, if they were any more laid back, they'd be horizontal? No. This guy is six foot under.
Whoa. He's so relaxed, he's goddamn dead. He has been for years. So he is horizontal.
I guess so. So horizontal he died. That's pretty chill. If you're that relaxed you actually forget to eat and drink and
breathe wow lee teach me your ways if i could just get one tenth of that level of chill thanks for
leaving a little something in the will lee thanks also to magical playlist people think that this
is just a playlist on spotify of magical songs right but it's more of a spell uh that when
you when you type in the playlist and hit search lightning bolts start coming out of your phone
frogs eyes of newt all this magic shit just starts pouring out of the thing very impractical like you
can't even use it really in a in a duel or something because you never know what's going
to come out but it's a pretty magical playlist it does what it says on the tin spotify know about this hell no absolutely not they shut
it down muggles thanks to queeveen brosnan queeveen only likes the finest cuisine if you
even approach him with a tray of chicken dippers he will slap that tray right out of your hands
which i think we established last episode.
It's the only food in the commune.
Yeah, chicken poppers.
You might want to pack a lunch, Creepin.
Yeah, there's not a lot of caviar in the paranormal commune.
No, no, no.
We only have crab eggs, which is the peasant's caviar.
Yeah, after the egg shortage of a few episodes ago, we promised everyone
infinite eggs. We didn't say what
species. We did not.
So if you like crab eggs.
Thanks also to Rowan Ryder.
Rowan Ryder is straight up a
superhero name. That is the
name of a man who can ride anything
immediately. Like just
pick it up and ride it.
What do you mean? Like a skateboard,
a bike, a horse.
Right, he doesn't have to take a lesson.
No, he can just immediately ride it.
Just like Jason Bourne, he's trained in
every sort of riding possible.
Of course, but even things that shouldn't be read,
like a golf ball. Really?
Yeah, just like he just... Just like a
clown just... Scoots around
on it. Wow. He can ride anything, this crazy son of a bitch.
What about...
A tree?
He's done it.
Really?
Yeah.
Straight down a hill once.
It was crazy.
That's insane.
It was insane.
He just karate chops it clean off its trunk.
And then just, again, much like the golf ball.
Just, yeah.
Which, also, if you can karate chop a tree in half,
I mean, that's already a pretty good power to have.
That'll kill a man.
You don't really need to be able to also ride anything.
True, but he's a pretty cool guy.
He can do both.
Thanks also to James Mainel.
James Mainel can main all characters in any game ever.
Whoa!
He's a bit like Rowan rowan rider but instead of riding things
it's a little bit less useful i'll be honest but he can he can pick up any character and crush
like that wow smash bro street fighter overwatch doesn't matter also unrelated but he can't ride
shit no he can't ride a bike he can't let alone a goddamn tree zero balance he actually he can't ride a bike and you can't let alone a goddamn tree zero balance. He actually he can't even sit upright
He's got a game lying horizontally. He tried to karate chop a plank and shattered his wrist
He's still crushed in that Street Fighter tournament that month though with one hand of course. Wow, that's badass
Thanks to Verena Schollert. You gotta be careful because Verena shall hurt you.
She shall. She's too strong
for her own good. You know, even if
she's just like giving you a little hug
goodbye.
Crushes your bones! Really?
Yeah, it's a real like
Hulk style. You can't
control it. She's just like, Verena
hug. And then just crushes
your ribs.iterate please
no love is too strong wow to have someone as powerful as verena supporting our podcast
fills me with confidence and fear so thank you for your support thank you to malcolm moss man
malcolm i'm not gonna beat around the bush it sounds like we should be investigating you
100 you sound like an episode.
You are a cryptid, sir.
You're not fooling anyone by putting a simple Malcolm at the start of your obviously cryptid name.
The Moss Man. The Moss Man of God knows wherever you're from, Malcolm.
Oh shit, London.
Moss fills the room.
Thanks also to Terry M. Roberts.
Terry, you're not fooling anyone with your short name.
You're obviously a pterodactyl.
We should be investigating you.
It will surprise you to hear this, folks,
but 90% of our Patreon supporters are cryptids, beasts, ghosts, and demons.
And dinosaurs, like Terry herself. They're hiding in plain sight. It's beasts, ghosts, and demons. And dinosaurs, like Terry herself.
They're hiding in plain sight.
It's true.
Terry's right here with her little dinosaur wings,
dropping her fossilized pennies into the bucket of the paleontologist peasants.
And we're grateful as hell, so thank you for your support, Terry.
And a bit like Animal Crossing style, as paleontologists,
we're turning up at local museums with new pterodactyl eggs.
Yeah.
And they're going, where the f*** did you find these?
These are precious as hell.
And we're like, we ain't telling s***.
Just give me the cash, Blathers.
They're like, this isn't how this works.
You don't get cash.
Thanks also to Lachlan Macaulay.
Every night, Lachlan gets locked in.
What?
This son of a bitch is a werewolf.
They can't let him out on a full moon.
Yet another paranormal entity.
Another paranormal entity supporting us with whatever his version of money is.
I guess he's like part wolf, so like he's giving us birds.
Like dead birds.
Yeah.
Leaves. Thinking that's like worth some money
to us that ain't currency lachlan it's not gonna be straight up cashola we're gonna need you to
freaking bite us turn us into werewolves so i can podcast edit through the night in wolf mode
which i assume is faster than human mode i think Pro Tools does have a wolf mode as well.
But thank you.
Where you can howl to control it.
Thank you for your support.
Thanks lastly, but not leastly, to Rob Mulkey.
Not a lot of people know,
Rob Mulkey is actually short for Robert Multiple Key.
He has a key to just about everywhere.
Wow.
I don't know how, I don't know why.
It makes him a great danger to society.
Because you can be like Lachlan.
You can lock your goddamn door.
But uh-oh.
Robert's still rummaging around in there.
He can get in.
He can get in anywhere.
He's even got the key to our own hearts. By supporting us on Patreon.
That's great, Nalvik.
We have the keys back to the commune.
Robert locked out. We really need
them back. Thanks to everyone we've
shouted out today, and everyone we've shouted
out in the past, and everyone we are yet
to shout out. We are slowly but
surely getting through our
beautiful list of patrons, so thanks for
sticking in there. As always, if
you were a long time ago, and
you think we might have missed you, we do occasionally
F up that
way um do let us know but otherwise we're getting there uh thanks so much for tuning in folks hope
you enjoyed this two-parter and we'll be back with a brand new paranormal case next week bye bye folks