This Paranormal Life - #135 Project MOONDUST
Episode Date: October 22, 2019When Sergeant Clifford Stone joined the secret military project named 'MOONDUST', he had no idea (for some reason) he'd be dealing with technology AND creatures from out of this world.PatreonSupport u...s on Patreon.com/ThisParanormalLife to get access to weekly bonus episodes!Buy Official TPL Merch! - thisparanormallife.com/storeFollow us on Twitter, Instagram, and YouTubeJoin our Secret Society Facebook CommunityResearch by Amy GrisdaleEdited by Louis BlatherwickIntro music by www.purple-planet.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
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Will there ever be a boat that can fly?
What is soup made out of?
All of these questions you can find the answer to
on This Paranormal Life!
Welcome everyone to This Paranormal Life,
the comedy paranormal podcast
where every week we investigate a brand new paranormal case
and at the end of it, we'll come to a conclusion
as to whether or not that case is true or it is false.
My name is Rory Powers.
This guy's name is Kit Greer.
Thank you, thank you.
And Kit, I'm really excited about today's case because, you know, I did introduce this as a comedy podcast.
Sure.
But comedy's out, all right?
What people like these days is freaking bone dry serial killer drama horrible stories
about murders right but i mean we've been like nominated for like comedy awards and stuff like
i think it might be a little out of left field if we just ditch all of that yeah blue well you
know what's a joke our listenership all right we're in the thousand and i want the millions
okay so if we could just
i'm gonna change up the vibe for this week all right hey i'm willing to roll with it see how
it goes this time awesome so we'll keep it serious bone keep it chill obviously like throw in a
couple jokes now and again what to keep it light but but don't take but also don't light but dry
it's a comedy podcast throw a bit. Okay, so dry and wet simultaneously.
Let's get started in today's episode.
All right.
I'm confused, but let's go.
It's 1961.
The Cold War.
Tension between the United States and the Soviet Union are higher than ever.
The quest for nuclear weapons.
The constant tension.
And of course, the space race.
Of course.
tension and of course the space race of course the ultimate contest to see which country would first successfully land a manned spacecraft on the moon now these were the days where the
technological advancements of war were quick and dirty scientists working around the clock to create
the furthest traveling missile the most destructive bomb anything to give their country's military the edge
yeah they weren't really uh like colliding particles or uh like trying to find different
principles of physics it was like how many men can we kill in a nanosecond 100 that's the that's
all you need to know when it comes down to war they had like thousands of scientists just trying
to make the biggest bullet ever made yeah
they didn't even have the big gun yet we'll start with the bullet work backwards backwards once
we've got the bullet we'll know what kind of gun we're working with now of course these days if you
want to see what kind of rocket russia is building you just fire up your computer hack their gmail
account and bit torrent the schematics but back in the early days of the Cold War, it wasn't that easy.
The best way America could keep up to date with what missiles and rockets the Soviets were testing
was to steal those rockets when they landed back on Earth.
Ooh, okay.
So they're launching unmanned rockets that they go into space to do, like, I don't know,
research or some shit testing
yeah but then they eventually have to crash back down and you're saying they
nab them then yeah yeah and this isn't even just um uh technology related to the space race
missiles test planes okay anything that's kind of sent out with no intention of being uh collected at some point all right america is like
a dirty little uh scavenger just traveling the world grabbing all this material and i guess you
know we were a little young as in little half-baked little not we weren't really existing yet during
the time of the cold war but i guess that that's what this meant it was like a time of like
political tension so they weren't like outright killing each other but they were taking carte blanche of each other's
shit yeah oh yeah yeah i'm trying to outdo each other so what we essentially have is america
traveling the world recovering the technology of their enemies existing under the name Moon Dust, the operation was a secret covert project organized by the
United States Air Force and their Missile Development Center at Holloman Air Force Base.
Wow.
The official aim for the project was to, quote,
Exploit the discovery of Soviet hardware when it temporarily landed in American hands.
I mean, it's pretty shameless, but hey, can't blame them.
Yeah, I mean, if it's there to gank, take it.
Now, because of the nature of the mission, Operation Moondust was paired with Project
Bluefly, another former covert project during the Cold War that was to exploit the discovery
of Soviet hardware when it landed in American or Allied hands.
Now I know what you're thinking.
These seem weirdly similar.
Almost redundant to have top secret operations doing the same thing.
Well, what we'll discover today, Kit, is that the US military are a bunch of tricky rat bastards.
And there's more to project moon dust than meets the
eye oh do you want to like so you're saying that i want to do a joke or something i don't want it's
just it's been pretty dry so far yeah like i've been rattling off facts and stuff i just feel a
bit bad sure i mean do a joke okay fine so because i said i said we're doing it seriously but
it doesn't mean switch off okay you know all right well you said do it dry but that's fine
i'll throw in a joke okay so wow you thought project moondust sounded bad i mean get a load of
of project bluefly i mean yeah sun's sun's like super super weak doesn't it you watch yourself okay i said
i said joke excuse i didn't say take the i was making light of it i don't that's what that's
what i said it's a serious case i said joke now and again but don't take the piss okay you come
to me with this blue fly shit so you need me to make a joke Yet somehow
Punch up
Play it straight
Yeah play it straight but joke now and again
So it's not just a snore fest
Can you possibly
Give me an example
Of how I would keep it straight
But also tell a joke
I'm making it as black and white as possible
Alright in full colour Those are contradicting terms straight but also tell a joke it's very i'm making it as black and white as possible all right in
full color i'm gonna stick to those are contradicting i'm gonna stick to the script
all right but we have to be able to improvise a little bit look we'll just i'll keep on with
this story be warned it's a little dry and a little serious so it wouldn't hurt to throw in
it wouldn't hurt to throw in a couple of jokes now and again okay okay i can see you're getting
stressed i'm gonna try my best in this next section i'm just worried because we're down
lighting it up just a tiny we're down to like six subscribers okay they're dropping like that
can't be right is that right it's getting real low all right and i just blue flies huh
right you out of the sky across the line dude let go of my arm i'm sorry i'm
getting stressed um i just think if we if we actually bring a case with a lot of research
yeah in preparation our six listeners will really appreciate it and they might hell they might hang
around for a little bit longer well not with you chastising me every 30 seconds yeah well
well well well certainly not if i'm co-hosting with a clown dropping punch
lines every other sentence you asked me to joke you asked me to tell jokes let's just you said
let's just move on with the story make it both black and white and technicolor now project
moondust didn't exclusively recover the remains of satellites in the united states but all over
the world in south africaivia, and according to one
source, even as far away as the Himalayan mountains. Damn, a Mount Everest? This meant
recruiting a lot of personnel to help. Enter Clifford Stone, a military sergeant who was
brought in to assist with the recovery process. You see, not knowing what technology the Soviets were working
on, each recovered object had to be treated as a high level threat. You don't know if they were
testing nuclear weapons. You don't know if it was just a ball of knives that was fired through the
sky. You have to treat every situation as if this thing is a nuclear reactor ready to blow makes sense i mean
it stands to reason as well that if the soviets catch wind of what's happening and that they know
the americans are ganking their technology at every turn they might start trying to weaponize
that in some way they're gonna weaponize these weapons what what easier way to trojan horse your way. Once fully trained to handle foreign materials in the recovery process, Stone began
traveling with the team across the world, moving quickly to capture foreign technology as it crashed back to Earth.
But the more missions Sergeant Stone was a part of, the stranger things became.
Stone said that on some of the missions, there was additional personnel assigned right at the last minute who weren't army officials. The missions where these mysterious
men joined were always the most important and the strangest, taking the teams to
unusual locations where the details of the recovery were not disclosed to the team. Wow.
Very quickly, Stone found himself recovering crash technology the likes of which he'd never seen
before. Sir, I've located the area of the crash site. Good work, Sergeant. Begin the salvage process.
Did you say this was a Soviet rocket, sir?
What's with the questions, Sergeant?
Well, sir, it's... it's like nothing I've ever seen before.
Far beyond anything the Soviets could possess.
Nope, it's Soviet, all right.
The craft seems to be capable of interstellar travel.
I mean, there's maps to parts of the galaxy that we haven't even... Yeah, that's Soviet, all right. The craft seems to be capable of interstellar travel. I mean, there's maps to parts of the galaxy that we haven't even...
Yeah, that's Soviet.
But, sir, I...
Listen, Sergeant, any more questions about this craft,
and you're going to need a recovery team to come pick you up.
It's capable of interstellar travel.
I have f***ed Zeno.
In the following months, it became obvious to Sergeant Stone of interstellar time. I have f***ed Zeno.
In the following months,
it became obvious to Sergeant Stone that Project Moondust
wasn't just salvaging Soviet technology,
but it was a cover for the U.S. military
recovering UFOs that had crashed to Earth.
Project Moondust,
combined with Project Bluefly, provided the perfect cover for these
crafts to be taken back to united states research facilities to be reverse engineered by scientists
this is ingenious so instead of duping only the public and relying on the entire military
industrial complex not to blow the lid on it they're duping
the dupes yeah they're duping their own men they're everyone beneath the goddamn president
of the united states thinks these are soviet crafts and this is all that the recovery team
know when they're signed on is we need you to help in this secret operation to recover soviet technology
which is already pretty damn secretive yeah without it actually being about ufos yeah i mean i mean
like they don't it's not like these people know what's going on back there like you say
this is the days of the the iron curtain no one knew what was going on back there yeah hell if
they have plasma rays and interstellar boosters i don don't know that's what the Russians are up to.
It's true. Folks, we are looking at a paranormal onion here. There are layers upon
layers of covert operations covered by covert operations and at its core is
probably the goddamn president. Clifford Stone worked for the military for years,
eventually disclosing that he had not only worked
on the recovery of alien technology,
but that on a number of occasions,
the pilots of the crafts had been found alive.
What?
I mean, that's a little bit harder to cover up.
Not when part of the recovery equipment is a 9mm.
It's pretty easy to push that shit under the rug.
One of the recovery people is like,
Stand back, gentlemen. I speak Russian.
He's like, in Russian,
Gentlemen, are you safe down there?
Jesus!
Stone said,
I am prepared to state that I have been at locations where craft of unknown origin
that did not originate on the face of this planet were there.
I am prepared to state that while I was there,
we saw living and dead bodies of entities that were not born on this planet.
I am prepared to state that they have a school to try and indoctrinate people.
I never went to that school. I always refused.
I am prepared to state that when I got out of the service in 1990,
that they held me for two months
so that I might better reconsider to stay in and not get out.
In violation of the law, they held me for two months
pending approval of my retirement.
Weird.
Yeah.
What does he mean, indoctrination are we talking like a little bit of adult education it's like here's why we did what we did or is it like
more men in black style neuralyzer pen wipe their memories i think in this context, it's more, I think it obviously becomes pretty evident when you're dragging a freaking laser engine out of a piece of debris that you're not dealing with Soviet technology.
Sure.
When you're looking at the lifeless corpses of three little gray men, they're probably not Russians.
No. gray men they're probably not russians no i think they offer this course uh to people who are
serving in project blue fly and in project moon dust to just be like okay so you know this shit's
real come to class we'll tell you all about it you're brought further into the circle we can
tell you more stuff you can uh move up the ranks in terms of these covert operations.
It's actually a pretty polite way of doing things.
They're like, listen, come along to the first class.
See how you feel.
You don't have to come back.
He's like, cool.
No worries.
He gets there in the first day.
They lock him in a room.
They're like, there's no class.
We have your wife and children.
If you tell anyone anything, we'll kill everyone.
Capisce? Lesson one is the humans are the bad guys the aliens are actually pretty chill a lot of our soldiers
actually defected over to planet spring break or whatever they actually have their own operation
on planet spring break where they recover human technology and recycle it into booze i mean i
appreciate the fact that sergeant stone just
turned it down i don't know anything about the military but it does confuse me that you have any
say in the matter i mean i i get that there's like a give and a take here they can't it's
difficult for them to disappear him that becomes a whole story in itself if he's not playing ball
they can't just kill him yeah because then his family are gonna be like where is he is everyone for them to disappear him that becomes a whole story in itself if he's not playing ball they
can't just kill him yeah because then his family are gonna be like where is he his everyone who
knows him is gonna be like where is he but at the same time i sort of feel like they like what he
just gets to it's just like a optional pe class he just says nah i don't feel like it and then he
just gets to tell the world the truth yeah it's surprisingly relaxed
i mean when you think of the military you think of orders being given orders receiving orders
yeah it's kind of like i mean isn't that a thing it's it's like if you disobey probably your
superior you could probably get court-martialed you know get in trouble dishonorably discharged
yeah if you're at war and you're you're you're in the trenches and
your commanding officer goes like all right soldiers this is it this is the
moment we've been training for all those push-ups sit-ups sleepless nights early
mornings is for this moment right now the future of the earth is on our
shoulders your children my children or their lives depend on this very second. Get over there and give them
hell. There's not going to be one guy that's like, no. I think there was a lot of people who said no.
I'm pretty sure they were shot. I think that was the rule. Let's go boys. Die there or die here.
Your choice. Even bigger yell. Well, interactions with UFO debris wasn't the only strange event Stone had been a part
of. He said that soon after his NBC training, when he had already been involved in the secret
recovery of alien crafts, he experienced one of the strangest interactions of his life.
He was being dropped off by a friend to Fort Lee, Virginia. On the drive to the base,
the pair began discussing some of the UFOs they had seen, the strange material, the impossible
physics of it all. He was dropped off and his friend drove away. Several weeks later, Stone
got a phone call from the same friend saying, Hey, I'm up at Fort Meade. Do you think you could come by and talk? He sounded a little
off, but Stone didn't think anything of it. So he drove to Fort Meade to meet with his friend.
But when he arrived, Stone was greeted by a stranger. The man said, your friend is a little tied up we'll talk about his situation as soon
as he gets free he's tied up that's his situation we don't know that that he could be using it as a
i didn't say that the man said by the way have you ever been to the Pentagon? This guy loves his job, by the way.
Oh, yeah.
At this time, Stone hadn't.
So the man said, well, it is a really unique place.
Why don't we go ahead and give you the 25 cent tour?
If anyone talks to you like that, best believe they have access to a button that will drop you into a pool of piranhas yeah drop
of a hat but that's also the kind of authority and power you can't say no to oh of course i'm
assuming this officer has so many goddamn stars on his uniform it looks like a galaxy yeah it's
like you know if the sun hits him at the right angle he could cook a chicken with a magnified beam that's how shiny this
bastard is because there's two types of guy in the military in popular culture at least there's
the guy that we often reference who is doing the motivational speaking of course and then there's
the guy who has so much political clout so much military prowess he doesn't even need to raise
his voice yeah oh yeah that's how
powerful he is you listen here this is the way it's gonna go yeah yeah yeah that guy's fought
in wars that are so secret we haven't even heard of them clifford said so we went on over we went
in i had a little badge that was given to me with no picture on it. But the guy that was with me, he's had a picture.
And he just tell the guards, he's authorized to come with me.
Finally, we got to a place that has an elevator.
We went down on it.
I don't know how far down we went.
I can't tell you if there's one flight under the Pentagon, two, or fifty.
But we went down.
When we get out there, there are two monorails.
I mean, there are monorails under the Pentagon.
They look like big tubes, rather thick in the center, one on each side.
So you had these little monorails with cars that looked like a bullet.
We got on one monorail and started to go.
It seemed like maybe 20 minutes minutes but i'm guessing that because
i don't know for sure what happened to his sense of time and space well i mean they've got a pretty
tight operation down there i mean bullet trains to secret bases under the pentagon how big is this
thing i thought i've seen a photo of the pentagon it's not that big yeah on top it isn't but it's like a goddamn iceberg that's right
and the u.s is the titanic that's been struck by it folks get real political
when we got out he says well let me show you some interesting sights down this corridor here
so we're going down the corridor and as we get closer and closer to that door, my
guide turned to me and stated, you know, things aren't always as they seem to be.
It is just like the walls here.
They don't seem like walls.
What?
I replied, what do you mean they're not walls stop speaking in riddles damn it it's like
the wall behind you i look and it looks like a wall to me there's no seams or anything then he
pushes me i try to grab myself but there's actually a door that opened. That was a very elaborate way of, I think what he's trying to say is,
there's a motion sensor door.
It was like the first ever supermarket automatic door.
And they were like, we spent trillions of military budget on this thing.
He said, the windows down here aren't really windows.
I didn't understand what he said, but they parted right down the middle to a store.
Convenient, see?
Snacks, drinks, everything you could want.
He called it a meal deal.
Southern fried chicken pasta, a Monster Energy drink, and crisps, all for the price of three pounds.
Look, all this food.
It looks fresh, doesn't it?
But look at the sell-by date.
Oh my god, it lasts for months. Look, all this food. It looks fresh, doesn't it? But look at the sell-by date.
Oh my god, it lasts for months.
So, he pushed him into a wall that turned out to be a door.
Alright?
While you go through the door, there's like this little field table there.
And behind the field table, you had this little entity.
The entity was a little bigger than the three, three and a half foot tall entities that are a lot of times reported, but there were two men on either side of the table, slightly behind
the creature. When I turned around, I looked right into the eyes of this little creature.
And you know, it's like you're seeing it, but everything is being pulled from you. It's being
pulled from your mind. He was reading my whole life.
It's hard to describe what I really felt there.
Your life up to that point goes by in seconds.
I remember going down, grabbing hold of my head, and falling to the floor.
The next thing I remember, I wake up and I'm back in my friend's office at Fort Meade.
Officers told me nothing had happened,
that I'd been there the whole day,
but I knew better.
Weird thing to say to a guy who just woke up.
Yeah.
Nothing happened.
You've been here the whole day.
I can't believe they pushed him into the interview room with a gray.
What the hell?
Who zapped his life out of his body till he passed out i mean why bring him there
to push him into an alien to have him pass out to drag him back to the fort and tell him nothing
ever happened i'm gonna go on a limb here and say that on account of the whole thing making no sense right there being apparently a city underneath
the pentagon yeah and then he woke up in a room there's a lot of there's a lot of things here
to decipher to digest he dreamed the whole thing we don't know we don't know that we don't know
that okay look we we think it cliffordord Stone, unfortunately, died in 2014.
Wow.
So we can't even really ask him these questions.
But in his life, he was part of something called the Disclosure Project.
Okay.
Now, this is right up our alley.
The Disclosure Project is an organization dedicated to disclosing, unclassifying,
dedicated to disclosing, unclassifying, and conducting hearings related to shadow governments,
UFOs, and extraterrestrial life.
That all sounds fantastic.
Yeah.
Now, at first glance, granted, it sounds like a club for the crazies.
But the Disclosure Project has over 400 members, many of which are ex-government, military, and scientific officials.
Wow.
I'd never heard of this group before.
No.
So I did a little research into it.
I genuinely wrote out some of the credentials of members just to show you how insane it is that these people are in this group.
Okay. insane uh it is that these people are in this group okay so some of the credentials we have navy commander pilot general with top secret clearance air force intelligence officer
five-star admiral the former head of the british ministry of defense former state senator nasa
research scientist defense intelligence agency official i mean the qualifications go on
that's a lot of medals yeah these are these are people that have literally no reason to join this
club other than the fact that they believe this happened it did happen and they were a part of it
that's pretty damn fascinating yeah i i know what you mean it at the very least it means that
they were privy to enough weirdness in their career that they want to know the truth yeah and
at most it means they were all best buds with greys until the day they retired and they got
torn away from them and now they want the world to know that they hang out with aliens because who wouldn't as much as we uh joke about the ridiculousness of going to the pentagon and the
underground city and being pushed into a room with an alien sure i will say that everything else that
we learned about uh project moon dust and project blue I mean, it's real to a certain extent.
These were secret military operations
that through the Freedom of Information Act,
all of it was declassified.
There are actual government documents
that I have seen online talking about Project Moondust,
recovering Soviet technology,
and there's even a couple mentions
of unidentified flying objects
yeah i mean it's it's indisputable that there wasn't secret government shady shit going down
granted it is another level to talk about the secret city under the pentagon yes and some of
these other theories that pop up but there's a certain degree of fact to this insanity what i
didn't mention about uh the disclosure project is that one of the main members stephen m greer
believes that marilyn monroe had an affair with robert kennedy who told her about the project and
the ufos and she threatened to reveal the truth and the government assassinated her. But that's just one opinion from one member of the group.
Listen, you know, a group of people like that,
they're not just going to have one or two interests in life.
They're going to have a bunch of different ideas.
Sure, they all like the disclosure project.
Hey, I'm sure some of them like golf too.
Hey, some of them like baking at the weekends. Other people think that Marlon Monroe almost revealed state secrets. Yeah,
but you know, that's par for the course. It's got to be tough when you're in that group and you're
out like a meeting and it's like, we need to tell people about the truth that the government doesn't
want the public to know. And if someone in the crowd is like we
need to disclose the information of of project blue book yeah all right here we go yeah we need
to tell people what really happened at roswell yeah yeah elvis presley the king of rock and roll, is in this room right now as a demon.
Thank you, Carl.
Always a pleasure to have you at the meetings.
Who let him renew his membership?
I thought we talked about this.
He found a loophole, actually, in the system that he's actually running the meetings.
So, actually, my time is up.
Carl is going to be leading the seminar for
the next, uh, how long are you going to be doing it for Carl? 45 minutes tops. All right. So we
got 45 minutes on Carl talking about Elvis, the demon. Possible locations of where Tupac
may still be alive and recording. Carl walks up to the mic. All right. Welcome everyone to the next
segment of today's speeches. I want everyone to turn to your left. Now everyone turn to your right.
Both of the people sitting beside you are Elvis. He can multiply like an agent. He can take human
form. People are filing out of the room as he keeps going.
All right, kids, we went on a bit of a journey here.
We not only investigated- On a bullet monorail train.
We not only investigated Project Moondust,
we briefly talked about Operation Bluefly.
We talked about Clifford Stone.
And I mean, I didn't even scratch the surface
on what Clifford went through i mean
he's met and talked with aliens he's been through it all he's recovered crafts from all over the
universe this guy's written books on the universe oh yeah oh yeah he's he's he's done some crazy
stuff um and i've also talked about this operation, the Disclosure Project, where over 400 qualified ex-members of government have decided enough is enough.
You know, all of them and Carl are going to change the world and tell people the secrets of the government and also that Elvis might be a demon.
What are your thoughts listen we always love to hear stories like these
where we can literally flick through historical military records for potential exercises in
researching the paranormal because it's a goddamn treasure trove there's there's been a ton of them
yeah out there and like you say there is no doubt with this that
there is some element of project blue book and some element of project moon dust that had a
paranormal motive that they were at least going into that operation with the potential to recover
experimental craft from potentially beyond this galaxy the greater question is of course is there enough
evidence to link the verifiable existence of those projects with the uh pretty outlandish
claims of clifford and potentially what the disclosure project are saying as well yeah that's
very well said because i think it's one thing to look at this case and be like what's there to debate we have unclassified documents that talk about operation moon dust
and it talks about ufos it's all there in the paperwork right but kind of what we have in the
paperwork is no more than the government saying that the the project is involved in recovering
ufos it doesn't say that they ever got one it doesn't have pictures of anything and what we
have there is the statement with none of the evidence so i think it's difficult we're looking
at a lot of things here but i think we need to narrow it down to just Project Moondust.
Okay, I can do that.
And it's not whether or not the project was created to find UFOs,
it's whether or not that we think that this project ever really did interact with alien crafts,
making it paranormal.
Which is a really tough question, because I'm excited to hear what you
say because I have literally no idea where I'm going to fall on this one. I think that Operation
Moondust, Project Blue Book, this definitely is the most believable scope for actually successfully
coming into contact with UFOs because they're across, they're international, they're across
all continents, they're using relatively
modern technologies to scan the skies and the upper atmosphere yeah for all signs of military
like technologies so if anyone's going to see it they are yet at the same time we do seem to have
a lack of first-hand witnesses even compared to some other UFO investigations
we've covered recently.
I think, you know what,
maybe this is a reflection of the fact
that there's not a lot of very specific information online
about Project Moondust,
except for the fact that it exists.
I mean, Roswell, we talked about that before,
where the government came and ganked a bunch of shit.
We just assumed it was a bunch of people being told what to do.
That could have been some super secret operation.
Project Mars Dust or some shit.
I have no idea.
We don't know.
It's secret.
Project goddamn Dorito Dust.
So I think that's the problem that I'm facing with this. I mean, when it comes down to it, do I think Project Moondust
ever came in contact with a craft
from out of this universe?
Yeah, probably.
Do I have any evidence to prove it?
No.
Does that make it a no or a yes?
I don't know.
It's okay to disagree at times.
I didn't take the lead in this investigation,
so I haven't seen enough to convince me.
And that's why today I'm coming down on a no.
All right.
I don't think it happened.
All right.
I'm going to say yes.
Okay.
All right.
So we're officially at war, you and I.
I'm starting Operation F*** Off, where anything in the studio that's yours,
I will be ganking for research purposes.
Dismantling, reverse engineering.
That's my electric toothbrush.
How does it work?
Wow.
Hey, it's been a while since we've had...
A rare disagreement.
Oh my God. On the cast. So that's it. That a while since we've had. A rare disagreement. Oh my God.
On the cast.
So that's it.
That's the end of the podcast.
This is our last episode.
I'm pretty sure it's like,
it's been this and Bigfoot.
It's the major disagreement.
So that's the show over now
because we disagreed once.
Yeah, it doesn't have to.
Shout out to our six listeners
who are still here
you made it to the end congratulations you completed it um yeah not often that we have a
yes or no on the podcast i was a little torn up about that one but i had to go with my gut in the
end and my gut says yes hey that's the right decision to make bro i know it was a bit of a
serious one this week uh with just a lot of facts and stories to
get through but to lighten the tension keep it bubbly kit's gonna hit us home with a joke right
now you know just give us that little comedic lift at the end of a serious one hey you want to hear
a great goddamn joke yes this entire episode wow the thing the whole thing was a joke and i don't
know why you're talking about it being bubbly because your attitude has been uh almost the exact opposite of bubbly this entire episode
i can't believe you would say that you already knew this isn't bubbly you already knew it was
a serious one borderline too serious this isn't this isn't fun podcasting for people listen to you i i agree with you because it's too
serious this is absolutely too serious you should feel ashamed you should be embarrassed for yourself
look it's been serious the whole freaking thing we got at each other a bit at the end there was
a disagreement i just think like a joke to end it and then we'll do shout outs um uh knock knock who's there a wall a wall who
do you get it it's like because we're in the pentagon so it's like it's not a door it's a
it's a wall because i asked i asked for a light-hearted joke all right i didn't i didn't
ask you it was based on i didn't ask you to***ing piss out of the story that I had just presented.
There's a difference, alright, you son of a bitch,
between telling a joke
and turning the whole thing into a big joke.
You said the same word twice.
Now I gotta do a straight read of the outro
because I think things are getting a little...
For the first time in 130 episodes,
why would you do a straight read? I hope you enjoyed listening to this jaunty. For the first time in 130 episodes. Why would you do a straight read?
I hope you enjoyed listening to this week's podcast.
For more information on Project Moondust,
you're going to want to Google Project Moondust
where you can look at the unclassified documents yourself.
Thank you for listening.
My name, Rory Powers.
This guy, Jokey McClownown face that's borderline that's a
joke you made a joke if you like the show i recommend that you go onto your laptop and visit
www.patreon.com forward slash this paranormal life have you slept since last week whereas what's going on we're from as little as two dollars a
month possibly three i'm not i cannot confirm those details at the minute as i am not familiar
with our bottom tier i'll confirm it but you can get you can get shout outs on the podcast
and bonus content additional people aren't gonna want shout-out if it's a straight read.
Just reading it a little bit straight.
If you want to chime in with a joke to lighten the mood.
There's no f***ing way I'm telling a joke.
And as always, if you do support us on Patreon,
what we like to do is give you a very special shout-out at the end of the podcast.
The podcast has been a little dry this week, okay?
I can't stress that enough, how bone dry it's been.
So you know it's been bad.
It's been pretty-
Borderline terrible.
There hasn't been a lot of comedy to lighten the mood,
and that's my fault as well as your fault.
It's in no way my fault.
So let's loosen up a bit for the shoutouts.
It'll make it a joke fest.
So, keeping it lighthearted,
thank you for all your support.
Let's go. Special thank you for all your support let's go special thank you
to daniel cunningham daniel cunningham is one cunning man this son of a bitch makes james
bond look like a hobo he's so cunning he makes makes tom cruise look like bomb booze really
someone who bombs and is an alcoholic.
Yeah.
That's right.
That's right.
This is how cunning this guy is.
He's got all the plans.
He's got everything.
He's somehow got my credit card information.
Really?
Which is crazy.
I was going to say,
is he at least like nice?
Is he?
No, you don't get that cunning by being nice. Oh.
You're actually a pretty bad person.
Oh.
Thanks, Daniel.
Thanks also to Christopher. Well, if it isn't kissy chrissy this guy read one fairy tale about one frog being a prince and this dude
just going around kissing every animal not even frogs so desperate snakes badgers bad idea poisonous
snakes ant eaters anything really in the hopes that it will turn
into maybe not even a prince but like a lambo right just anything better than the shit he kissed
got it maybe some sort of hoping if he kissed us if he frenched a borderline snail he might get a
phantom rolls royce out of it of course yeah but it it hasn't worked out and a lot of
the things like snakes for example don't like to be kissed no no thanks also to nina hoffman
nina the ballerina uh is actually world famous for doing you know like the little ballerina
pillar pirouette yes she's still spinning when did she start a long time ago they like the the world record person
was there with the little like clipboard yeah and was ready to just sign off and be like that's
awesome you only had to do six in a row yeah it's really not that many he just had to give up and go
home after a minute they gave her the reward granted she doesn't know though she's spinning
at such velocity that um she's beginning to actually burrow down towards the mantle of the Earth.
Yeah, they think that she's in some kind of space-time stasis.
So she'll probably emerge in the year 3000, not a day older, honestly.
Can't wait.
Thanks also to Trudy Johnson.
Wow, if it isn't Judge Trudy.
Wow.
Yeah, everyone already only knows about Judge Judy, the mean one.
But there is actually a twin who's the nice one.
It doesn't make as interesting TV because...
Just lets everyone off, really.
Like serial killers go up and Judge Trudy's like,
Hey, it's got nothing to do with me.
Get out of here, you little scamp.
Gives him a little hug.
A lovely hug.
The serial killer's like i'm gonna do
it again i'm gonna do it all again you you might be next judge trudy yeah well who knows thanks
also to matthew matthew we want to cast you in a feature film this paranormal life you will be
kit my friend and i'll be playing me what that's right i'm sorry to break it to you malvena you
just don't have the first
i'm alert i don't have the one you got a face for radio pal you got a face for podcast that's all
that's all i'm saying buddy i'm looking at this image on patreon of matthew and this guy is a
straight up zero well he's a straight up zero that's a little that's a little hard on a future
a future star all right this guy out auditionauditioned Tom Holland for the role.
So I think he's got some credentials.
Tom Holland weighed in for me?
That's insane.
See you on the red carpet, Matt.
Tom said I'll do anything to get out of this Spider-Man shite.
Thanks also to Gary Russell McNamara.
Gary, I don't want to Russell you too much,
but how would you like to be the understudy
to play Kit in the feature film
This Paranormal Life?
This can't be.
I don't even get to be my own understudy.
No, you didn't make the cut.
You didn't make the cut.
I wasn't auditioned.
You didn't even tell me this feature film was happening.
Buddy, we've done 120 f***ing episodes of the podcast.
You've auditioned.
Trust me.
At least tell me this is like,
just like a weekend for fun indie flick.
Well, it's going to be part of the MCU.
We're actually being brought in in stage two.
Are you kidding me?
It's crazy.
That's why Tom had to turn it down.
Conflicts.
In what universe does this make any sense?
How are we part of the MCU?
Well, to start, Gary's got the time stone.
So that pretty much explains a lot of it.
Is this real or fictitious anymore?
Well, f***ing congratulations Gary, I guess.
Jesus.
Can I at least be like, get you coffee or something?
Thanks also to Josh!
Josh, I have a proposition for you.
Don't do it.
There's gonna be a lot of stunts in this movie,
and obviously I'll be doing my own,
but how would you like to be the stuntman for Kit in the film?
Am I doing, like, dope stunts?
What's going on?
The character, Kit, is going to be doing dope stunts.
Right.
Front flips, back flips, side flips.
Because the character, Kit, is pretty dope and jacked.
Yeah, he's actually, like a uh really just cool version
um of kit the real life character okay um and obviously the rory character is cool too
and i kind of fit that that uh that role a little bit more uh i can flip i flip every day i back
flip out of bed into my jeans so me i think and josh is the stuntman are really gonna piece this thing together so
excited to have you're your own sorry man what i'm my own i'm doing my own stunts yeah why did
you just say that as if i was talking over you what sorry did you ask a question you don't even
know who i am anymore sir thanks also to amber zamora kablamber, Amber. This girl is dynamite.
Really?
She is literally a bomb.
Really?
People don't know how to defuse her.
She just showed up one day.
She doesn't talk.
She ticks.
Her height, one foot.
Her width, one foot.
She's a cube.
A box?
Yeah, she's...
I shouldn't really refer to her as as she because it is a bomb.
Right.
That's just the name the SWAT team have given her.
Really?
Couple Amber Amber.
They gave her a double-barreled name.
That seems crazy.
So I'm excited that you've become sentient and you enjoy the podcast.
Please inform us if you are about to detonate.
And, you know, we'll just back up.
Just get a bit of distance.
Thanks also to Daniel Thompson.
Daniel Thompson committed the top sin.
Whoa.
Which is essentially all of the sins of the world combined into one.
That doesn't seem good.
It's when you are envious of God's chicken sandwich.
And you steal it and eat it. Gly yeah and then jack off that's yeah
that's pretty bad uh whatever that one is deviant it's at least embarrassing yeah it's really bad
and it is the top sin uh which i guess you know there's not many people in that club that can
tick that box but all of them are in hell So at least you guys have that in common.
It's pretty baller you pulled it off.
You commit that one, you go straight to solitary.
Thanks also to Katie.
Wow, we're supported by Skatey Katie,
the girl who can skate at everything.
She can ice skate, roller skate, skateboard.
She does it all.
In fact, she even is so passionate about it,
she combined all of her
favorites together and built a rollerblading skateboard with ice skates on her hands the
most nuts thing is that she can't walk she can't she's scared shitless of walking uh she didn't
basically move until her teens when she was bought Heelys for the first time.
She could suddenly skate.
It was a miracle. Doctors
couldn't believe what they were seeing.
They tried everything except Heelys, to be honest.
Thanks also to Sabrina
Eves. Sabrina Eves,
I believes that you are
thieves. What?
A lot of shit's gone missing in the paranormal
commune, and I have one suspect.
Sabrina.
Thieves.
Everything's gone missing.
The eggs.
The chicken poppers.
The golden chalice at the Christine Chapel.
There's not a lot of shit in the commune.
So when something goes missing, it's pretty obvious.
Yeah, it's pretty bad.
So if you could please just...
Look, we'll put a box out in the courtyard.
You can just return the objects.
Sabrina, we'd really appreciate it.
She stole the box.
We're now down a box.
Sabrina, goddammit.
Master thief.
Thanks also to Amber Scruggs.
Amber Scruggs.
That's a name that belongs on the credit roll of a brand new Marvel film.
Surely not.
Amber, we're looking for a first AD because the first first AD just dropped out.
What? Who is that?
Christopher Nolan.
He was the... Who's directing?
He's the AD.
Yeah.
That is insane.
Yeah, it's a big film.
He only does his own shit he couldn't even get
director on this film guess who's directing i can't imagine it's me i'm directing i'm starring
and i refuse to believe this and amber i think you have the infinity stones you seem to be wielding
the universe at your will this is obscene welcome to the big leagues amber congrats whatever thanks lastly but
not leastly to jacob miller we actually wanted to treat the commune so we uh we ordered a full
truck of miller just so that everyone could enjoy some some icy beers on tax day the truck arrived
and it's just jacob miller in a van uh we didn't realize that it wasn't a beer it was just a
guy um so he just unloaded himself onto a horde of thirsty uh commune members i can't imagine that
went well we tried to drink him yeah i tried to drink him but he's just a man you can't he doesn't
try to puree him down like a like an orange juice it didn't work work. But now, look at him. He's one of us.
He's one of the very, very thirsty commune members.
Thirsty, angry, taxed to the gills commune members.
We couldn't do it without him.
So thank you to everyone that we shouted out.
I hope you enjoyed this week's episode
of This Paranormal Life.
And as always, we will be back next Tuesday
with a brand new paranormal tale bye-bye folks
there's a there's a there's a difference between saying a joke
and making the whole thing a big joke you should say yeah