This Past Weekend - E478 Shane Gillis

Starting point is 00:00:00 Bet on the NFL with Bandual, official sports put partner of the NFL. Download the app today to see why we're in North America's number one sports book. 19 plus and physically located in Ontario. Gamling Problem Call 18665312-2600 to visit connectsentario.ca I have new tour dates to tell you about. I'll be in New Orleans, Louisiana. We're coming back over there. We're going to do it at the Sanger Theada down

Starting point is 00:00:25 now, down that downtown March 29th and 30th. That's Easter weekend. Get your tickets early with the pre sale code rat King starting this Wednesday, January 17th at 10 a.m. local time. General on sale begins Friday, January 19th at 10 a.m. local time. We also have tickets remaining in Charlottesville, State College, Amherst, Brisbane, Sydney, in the Australia, and Atlanta, Georgia. Get all your tickets at Theovon.com slash tour. We are down here in Austin, Texas, over at rooster teeth studios and we are happy to be here and Really happy to let you know about today's guest He's one of the brightest young comedians in the world. He is just a damn. I mean just a long damn Just ivory flamingo of a boy

Starting point is 00:01:21 And he is just so humorous and you know him from Matt and Shane's secret podcast and his latest special beautiful dogs on Netflix. I'm grateful to get to spend time today with my friend, Mr. Shane Gillis. I'll spin and tell you about your feelings. Shine on me. And I will find a strong, I will stay there. I'm gonna step. I'm really not. It's a podcast.

Starting point is 00:02:08 You're good as a fuck. We can sit here and say nothing and people be like unbelievable. The two comedic geniuses of our time. I've done it again. Legging. You're like, yo, how do you jack off? How do you boot? People are holy fuck.

Starting point is 00:02:23 I'm not worried about it. Legend dude, how weird is it when people start saying you're a legend and you're like, I just ate a Wendy's burger in the like family restroom by myself. Like I'm depressed. That's always weird, I think. Cause that's probably started to happen. You people are like, dude, this guy's the king, right? There's some, yeah.

Starting point is 00:02:48 Yeah, for sure. A lot of, I've heard stuff like that off road Elvis, people call you that. Yeah. Late Elvis, Vegas Elvis. Yeah. That sweaty, dying Elvis. That actually fires me up.

Starting point is 00:03:00 I'll take that. Yeah, people say, like, you'd be like the baddest dyke in the world, people say I've take that. Yeah, people say, like, you'd be like the baddest dyke in the world. People say I've heard that. It's crazy. I'm so, and I mean holding back water. I'm not talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:03:14 Stick finger in there. Dude, if we win, what if we did undercoated, we're undercover lesbians? I think you and me can pull that off. Really easy. You get rid of that. Not all of it. I know. Oh, yeah, leave a little stubble like one of those really crazy Like the ones that are like you know, they want you to know they could have been a man if they wanted to but they chose Yeah, for sure

Starting point is 00:03:37 Yeah Good to see you man. Good to see you man. Shane bro nice to see you, man. Good to see you, man. Shane, bro, nice to see you. I'm always happy to see you. You too, man. Thanks for thanks for hanging out in, uh, yeah. And I was so glad that I got to do Matt and Shane's secret podcast. Yes, dude. Dude, that was awesome.

Starting point is 00:03:54 That, uh, Matt's amazing. Matt's one of those guys. It's like you Tim Dylan and Matt are the guys Nick Mullen can do it too. It's nice to be on a podcast with you guys where you can just sit there and be like, all right, go. Cause I'm not, I feel like I'm not that great at it. I'm good at, you know, yeah. It's nice to have somebody that's just like, good at it.

Starting point is 00:04:14 I think I'm feeling pretty tough and I can, you know, I can do something, you know. Yeah, you can, but then I get, yeah, sometimes the wheels start to fall off. I agree, I'm actually very similar. If I'm like, I, this is fun, I'm having a good day. Sometimes I'll get, yeah, sometimes the wheels start to fall. I agree, I'm actually very similar. If I'm like, this is fun, I'm having a good day. Sometimes I'll just, yeah. Not many, not many funny responses, just, yeah.

Starting point is 00:04:31 Doing it with a buddy is so fun, dude, because you have like, there's just somebody to talk to, like sometimes I'll do it by myself, and I'm like, fuck, I wish there was somebody else here, you know? I'm doing it by yourself, crazy. That is so crazy. I can't, I can't imagine that often you do that. It really is.

Starting point is 00:04:48 I think I do it like once a month right now by myself. It's gotta be hard. Yeah, I think it's, let me think about what it's like. I think sometimes it's just tough because you're only, if you have a bad attitude, it's just you, you know? I can't imagine. Yeah, if I felt that, I would go on there and... Just feel like, hey, I feel bad.

Starting point is 00:05:06 But then you don't want to be every week, like, hey, I feel like shit. I know. I've been in several months of that. Yeah. Every episode, I'm like, fucking hungover again. Yeah. God damn it, this is depressing.

Starting point is 00:05:17 Yeah. Really, it makes you feel that? Like every time you show up, you're like, oh, I'm hungover and you start to notice a pattern, you mean? Oh, yeah, for sure. Yeah, I drink too much. That's it, but I love it. I love it There's no part of me that's like I stop. Oh, yeah, I was like now. You got it Yourself you got not there you're fully in control. No, I mean

Starting point is 00:05:42 Dude one time we were drinking up my buddy and he got into the Uber ride and he just didn't get his like, he had like real kind of heavy legs because his mom kind of had heavy legs but she'll wear tight pants and you kind of couldn't tell but if you were over there a lot, you knew

Starting point is 00:05:57 that she kind of had really stocky legs and but he was bringing his second leg into the Uber and his sandal fell off, right? So then we had this place we've got me and he fucking shows off. Yeah, everybody was just like, he just seems so much drunker than he was, you know, it's pretty. I lose them. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:06:15 That's, yeah, losing one piece of footwear and somebody's like, oh, that guy's like a lens of a glasses. One lens. You're fucking hammered. You're a crack head now. Oh yeah, that's insane. I feel like losing a glasses lens, you gotta really. Yeah, your kids are like, nah, uh. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:06:35 Yeah, your kids are like, we're not, we're gonna order pizza. Forever, it's pizza time. Yeah. What was I looking at this one that was making me laugh? It was, oh, you see that thing with the mayor? Do you see that thing with mayor, with the mayor of New York? No.

Starting point is 00:06:51 Oh, it's a, oh yeah, this is it right here. Do you see this? So Eric Adams, he teaches, what was he saying? They're teaching kids how to... They're teaching parents how to search your kids' room to find drugs and gun stuff. Get it, you see this? You can look at a jury box. A jury box of this nature's maybe a simple jury box kids how to teach and parents how to search your kids room to find drugs and gun stuff. Maybe a simple jury box, but if you look through it closely, you don't know what your job may be hiding.

Starting point is 00:07:16 That's from the state of New York. I'm all on started. I don't think the music is crazy. It's like the fuck out of these people. It's like, it almost seems like the story before Castlevania starts it on a video game. So, jury box. Yeah, this is the opening menu. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:07:37 But if you look doing closely, you don't know what your child may be hiding. For instance, a gun, good picture frame behind you. Tamiya, try to determine what's what's taking place. Behind a picture frame, you can find bullets. You should always win your child. This is a video game. That's where you find bullets. A video game. Look through it. Look through his nap bag. You might find a grenade. In addition to a bullet, something simple as a crack pipe. Something simple as a crack pipe

Starting point is 00:08:09 Great is the kid Also it could be a place where you could secrete or hide drugs This is a Like a put like this with a button is a perfect invitation to hide something I've felt something bumpy I will reach in, see what it is. Just look at all the other cases. You guys have got to stop, man. You guys have to see the, I mean, the test, that's unbelievable.

Starting point is 00:08:33 Look at this. Where's the cocaine at? Hi, cocaine. You can look at a jewelry box. A jewelry box. Oh, no, I like it. More than just look. Perfect place to put it. Just look It is just look inside your bookcases.

Starting point is 00:08:47 This is like black clue. I feel like. Call me fucking Colonel Muscle. Look behind his picture. Your cousin. What's that? Eight ball. Some supositories.

Starting point is 00:09:00 He's like, Oh, looking, looking this baby doll. What's in there? A shank. A picture of Andy Dufrein. That's a good? A shank, a picture of Andy Dufring. That's a good kid. I mean, he's got guns and a printer. Yeah. Oh, it's a nice room.

Starting point is 00:09:10 Yeah. It's like, oh, oh, look under that Nintendo switch. Oh, what's that? Bam. It's a 12 gauge and some tram of dolls. Now we're the leaders. That's got a lot of guns. That's pretty awesome.

Starting point is 00:09:24 That's pretty awesome, man. He's a guy I like him. Eric Adams? Yeah, he seems funny. Yeah. He seems good. Yeah, I think he obviously seems down earth. He's willing to do that.

Starting point is 00:09:35 Yeah. You know, because that seemed like it could be like a sketch, you know? I think that was a sketch. You think? Who wears that for all? No, that's real. It feels like Renoir one. That's real. That's real. That's old though. I don't know how that has to be old. There's no way New York.

Starting point is 00:09:50 It was tweeted out like this week and that's why I got around. I mean to punch holes in it because if that just came out that looks like it's from 20 years ago. It looks like that was. Yeah. Check your sons and vis-a-line case. He may be hiding shotgun shells or just something. Boots. Yeah. Look behind that autographed picture of Katie Perry. Oh, what's that? That's a gambling gun and some oxies. Oh, you think it's just your child's retainer case, but open it up and bam. It's an indentured servant as a quailoons. That is good for, yeah, honky parents need to be doing this also. What do you mean? Just, you need to find, they need to find the weapons.

Starting point is 00:10:31 Yeah, do your parents ever check your, I'm trying to give my mom, my mom came in one time and I remember I was touching myself, right? Big surprise. And she's like, what, what are you doing? That's what she said. She said, Yeah, she's like, what are you doing? I was like, and I was kind of sitting on the bed.

Starting point is 00:10:56 It was almost like very, almost as if like in the 1800s, you'd wandered upon like a guy who was like a gesture, traveling in the woods, and he'd take him off his suit, and he'd jerk him off by the river bank or whatever. And she's like, what are you doing? And I was like, get out. And so then she closed it over, right?

Starting point is 00:11:16 She waited like two seconds, right? I continued past her, and she came running back. Dude, I had a hotel guy do this to me like a couple months ago. No way really. I was in Indianapolis, a fucking Indian man walked straight in the room while I was jacking off. A real Indian guy.

Starting point is 00:11:33 Wow. No, from India. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, hotel, yeah, definitely. And he, the guy at the front, he stood there for a while. Oh yeah. And I was like, yo, you got to get out of here. And then he stood outside the door,

Starting point is 00:11:47 waited like 15 seconds and knocked. Oh, wow. I would start jacking off as soon as he left again. So I was jerking off again. I hear a fucking knock. I was like, dude, get the fuck out of here. And what are you doing? The crazy part is imagining you walk over there

Starting point is 00:12:03 with your wiener still in your hand and look at that little peephole. Who's somebody else? Someone different. I just screamed that with my cock in my hand. I was also, I was naked laying on top of the made bet. I didn't even get onto the covers. It was right when I checked in.

Starting point is 00:12:22 Oh, that's sad. I just stripped down and went straight to it. You did? Yeah. What is it that makes us do that, you know, hotel rooms? It's almost like, you know, some birds when they after they flown for a long way, they like vomit, right? When they land. It's, uh, I don't want to, it's something like a seagull or something. Yeah. Yeah. You know, some birds can fly almost 1100 miles before they land, right?

Starting point is 00:12:42 But there's some when they write when they vomit, they land. We looked that up. Yeah, I see defensive vomiting that Turkey's vultures do. Yeah, I don't know about when they land defensive vomiting. There's a Philly Philly's fan defensive vomit. It on a kid one time at a game. Yeah, the guy from was talking shit and he puked on a son during the baseball game. Defensive. That guy's turkey ball. Yeah. That's a cracker barrel. That's his right. Cup puke on at a baseball game. Because you're drunk.

Starting point is 00:13:12 Dad with one fucking lens in his classes was mouthing off. There's way too many fights at these games these days. Or do you think we're just recording them? Now that's what it is. I don't know. There's always been that many fights. We're there has always been that many fights, but it's so easy to get in a fight at a sporting event.

Starting point is 00:13:29 Yeah. Cause you want your team to win so bad. And then there's a guy next to you like clapping hard for the other team. Well, people also some, yeah, that's true. So there's a guy hate him. I can't control this game, but I can fuck that guy up. I'll take a point, you know, I might be losing my 30 out there, but right here, I'm about to win.

Starting point is 00:13:45 Yeah, I'm going to get arrested after the loss. Yeah, I'm going to be. I'm going to vomit. I'm just going to pass on. I'm going to go on a kid is so well, just be like this game's not go well. There's no video. Is that the guy who did it? It's from 2010.

Starting point is 00:14:06 You do. He does have one lens. I knew it. Matthew. Yeah, he's got one lens. Matthew Clemens Philly's fan, vomit. Vomit man. Super hero.

Starting point is 00:14:20 I guess he threw up on a cop and a kid. That was a, he just won. Wow. It's on a spree. Yeah, it says right there, what fillet will be a fillet's fan? Matthew Clemens did was enough to make himself sick and us too for that matter,

Starting point is 00:14:37 but at least now he admits it. Wow, good friend, we should call him sometime. The 21 year old Cherry Hill New Jersey, and I've been there, made love to a Native American woman there, which is crazy because you were just talking about that. I forgot about that. And the hotel was under renovations. And it was crazy. I think she thought I was bringing her to like some like crazy place or something because it was though, you know, all that visc.

Starting point is 00:14:58 You thought there was a door. Visc queen hanging everywhere. Like it was, I don't even think people should have been staying there. Like you didn't even have a door. It was like, this queen, you had to hold your car key up to the vis queen and just make like a sound and then go. Let me see. Clemens pleaded guilty to simple assault and other charges Tuesday, May 25th, intentionally vomiting on a man, a police officer, and his 11 year old daughter, wow.

Starting point is 00:15:25 So it was a police officer at the game. He wasn't like getting arrested. Well, no, it's time to get him. Crime sideers offering to buy vomit man a satellite dish to discourage him from going to any more games, a satellite dish. He's gonna be pumped. Vomiting man get hold of a saddle like this. Only buy you something from the past, you know.

Starting point is 00:15:47 Yeah. He got 30 to 90 days in jail and two years of probation. Oh, get him. Wow. Damn. Also quick update. The Eric Adams video was from 2011 when he's a senator. It went reviral.

Starting point is 00:16:00 Still a senator doing that is. Yeah. KFC posted it on bar stool. Yeah. Check inside of your son's baseball batman. He could be hiding a couple of Vikings in there. It's fucking ridiculous, you know. Look under your little daughter's pillow.

Starting point is 00:16:15 She could have some hookers at a score or something like that. Check out of the bed, man. I found you. Oh, you think it's a war under there? Yeah. Yeah. You all, you think that's a war under there. Yeah. Hey, you, oh, you think that's a boogie man on the other son's bed? That's some boogie pussy. That's a whore. That's an escort right now. The khakis are so nice in that video. khakis and a blazer just, they could be bullets in there. Oh, you think that's a stuffed ludicrous

Starting point is 00:16:40 doll, but open up his back and boom. What do you got? A butt balloon of crystal and a couple of narcan chewables. What were we talking about, dude? I'm a man. Oh yeah, you moved here. I did, yeah. You moved here since last talk to you. Yeah. You made a big move, so like, cause you moved from New York.

Starting point is 00:17:03 Yeah. Wow. And was there part of you that was kind of scared? Was there, like, what were you thinking? Cause, I mean, I've thought about it, you know, and a lot of people have done it, you know? No, I'd come down here a lot, cause, you know, do Rogan's podcast down here, do comedy.

Starting point is 00:17:17 So I've been down here enough. So I wasn't worried about like living here. I was worried about, uh, comics being like, uh, pussy, you left New York, you're talking about some Rogan's dick. I was worried about comics being like pussy. He left New York, he's trying to fuck some broken dick. That was like, I was like, that's gonna happen. I know that. No, I was excited, Matt was excited about it.

Starting point is 00:17:34 So I knew I had Matt coming down with me and then we brought our other friends and it was good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I, uh, and taxes are, oh yeah. What fuck New York, dude? Yeah, it's crazy. It's great. Yeah. And uh, oh, what's that in your daughter's bedroom? What's that in the case? Oh, that's actual taxes. That's what I did. That's their taxes in a couple of psalms, bro. Like a lot of taxes up there. Oh, it's crazy. It's actually, I think 14% what's the state tax rate in New York City?

Starting point is 00:18:06 You're up there Zachary. I think it's 10 point. Oh, he's guessing. What is it? No, I'm not a gas. I got four percent to 10.9% you see here. Wow. Because Los Angeles is 13, I think. Yeah, I was holding around that four percent range for a while when I lived in New York. And then you probably moved up into at least that 6.85%. Yes. Yeah, dude, so that's kind of crazy. So you moved, yeah, like, yeah, I think some people

Starting point is 00:18:35 say that to like, oh, do you want to move there? Cause Rogan's there, cause Dylan's there. It seems like the new thing. And I think, yeah, I kind of, I don't know if I had some fear. I don't know, I don't know if I had fear of that. You definitely think, oh, people think you're just, yeah, you're just riding that guy's a wiener, you know? Yeah. Somebody else. Yeah. Yeah. Um, but also he's like, I would say that if I was still in New York, yeah, somebody else moved there, but I fucking pussy gun I do the same thing. Yeah, come back and pay these high taxes. Hey, these quality taxes. Living in the shittles in New York.

Starting point is 00:19:07 Yeah. But no, I just wanted to move to a place where you could do stand up during the week. And forever it was just New York and L.A. That's true. Now you can do it in Nashville and Austin. Does it feel, well, that's what you cannot. Oh, really? Yeah, you cannot.

Starting point is 00:19:23 It's not the same. I will, I'll say that 100%, it is not the same as what it feels like here. Yeah. Like even as going over to the mothership, it's like you can do three sets in a night probably. Yeah, you can do four every single time. There's usually two shows in the smart room, two in the

Starting point is 00:19:40 main room. I mean, that's great. You do four sets a night, yeah. Four sets a night in the same building you can go do. I mean, that's, that's on press. Yeah, that's great. You do four sets a night, yeah. Four sets a night in the same building that you can go do. I mean, that's on press. Yeah, it's changing. What's nice is watching like McCoscar,

Starting point is 00:19:50 because he was in Philly where you can't do that. And now he's been living here just a few months and he's gotten so good. Really? Just from doing, yeah, he can do it every night. Yeah, I met him last night. Or I met him at your pocket. I met his wife too.

Starting point is 00:20:04 Yeah. Brittany is her name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She got a beautiful little pocket. I met his wife too. Brittany is her name. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She got a beautiful little wife. Yeah, she's great. Yeah, dude, I think having that much ability to get up is it starts to change. You're like, oh, I just practiced it.

Starting point is 00:20:17 He didn't go in there. Let me try it. You're like right there. Get the bomb four times. Yeah. Take it on the road and be like, I'm not gonna change anything.. Fuck it. Still not work. This episode is sponsored by prize picks. Do you love firing on sports? Well, prize picks is the best daily fantasy sports

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Starting point is 00:24:05 by visiting betterhelp.com slash THEO today to get 10% off your first month, that's betterhelp.com slash Theo. Yeah, that's wild, dude. Yeah. What has been like, did you find a house immediately? How'd you find a house down here? I just had a real estate lady.

Starting point is 00:24:29 I was like, I just need a house that's furnished because I don't have anything. Yeah. So she first house, she picked out. I was like, that's it. Oh yeah. And I didn't see it until I moved in. No.

Starting point is 00:24:39 It was nice. Yeah, I moved in. It was like, it's fucking nice. Oh, it's like that show where you meet your wife the first time. Yeah. Like Indians. Yeah, it's fucking nice. Oh, it's like that show where you meet your wife the first time. Yeah, it's like Indians. Yeah, that's crazy dude. Bro, because here's the craziest part about that getting married.

Starting point is 00:24:51 Like that is you, what if you know your parents are fucking lame dude, like they've been picking shit out for you for Christmas every year and they pick out like horrible shit. Wow, there's also the forced marriage is kind of nice though. Because if I fuck like an ugly chick, I'm like, they and people are going to find out about this. You know what I mean? Right. Now if it's just like, dude, I had to.

Starting point is 00:25:12 You know what I mean? It's like, my parents made me fuck this chick forever. I don't care if it's girls or girls. Yeah, dude. Oh, I got it. So I'd be on a desert island. Oh, I got to tell people next time I go on there. What's that? I'm saying like if you're stuck on a desert island,

Starting point is 00:25:28 you're gonna fight, you know. It's like this is who I'm with, I have to. Yeah. There's no judgment here. Oh, yeah. With like Epstein's island. Yeah. You know, if you're on island.

Starting point is 00:25:39 Yeah, whatever. Whatever, my bad. No, I think, look, let's talk about it. If you're on an island, you have to fight. And there's a lot of young people running around. You're the only adult. Yeah. What are you doing?

Starting point is 00:25:50 What are you doing? Come on, man. This way you need to check through your child. Check through your child's coloring books easily in there. They could have a couple ninja stars and a bear trap. That guy's out of his fucking mind. That's good stuff. Yeah, dude.

Starting point is 00:26:10 What were we talking about? It was the islands. Yeah. We were talking about you buying a house unseen. Yeah. Yeah. That's great. The thing I was most worried about was the television,

Starting point is 00:26:21 because I thought it was like, they thought they were gonna hit me with the Airbnb pictures. Like you get there and you're like, oh, fuck, this house sucks. TV's big, so I'm good. Oh, that's good. Thank God it's furnished, or I would have never furnished it. Yeah, I'd have one folding chair in front of the TV. Yeah, yeah.

Starting point is 00:26:39 My house was furnished when I got my house, thank God. And then, who told me, oh, Tom Sager told me in this room, he said, hey man, you gotta start getting some art for yourself. You have to get something you like because it really does start to change the way that you think about your own house. Tom's becoming like the JC of stand up. He's got invested in art.

Starting point is 00:26:56 You gotta do it. Yeah, he's got it already got sneakers. He's got a Yamara, what the car is called? The fastest one. McLeaner? McLean? McLean, is that it? Yeah, that's wild to me. I think I'll be scared to be like real rich.

Starting point is 00:27:14 I would not do it. I bet you're all right. Oh, I think I'm okay having more money for sure, but I think if I tried to be real rich, I just don't know how I would, I don't know what I would spend money on, you know. Like, would you get a super fast car? I'm, no, I'm afraid to drive fast.

Starting point is 00:27:33 Yeah, yeah, I think yeah. I just don't know what I would get. Probably guns, probably, couple. You gotta get guns. Yeah, couple for your neighbors, couple for you. Give them out. Yeah, you don't want to shoot your neighbors Kid's room

Starting point is 00:27:47 Your neighbor's kids room start fucking playing guns. Oh damn what's this behind this child's baby suit right there? It's an AR 15 Oh, you think that's a much dangerous gun in the world. Yeah, you think that's a water weapon That's a AR 15 right there with some blood on it. Now I understand Tom though. He's doing, I mean, he's got money watching, you know. Oh, I think there's something. He knows how to spend it.

Starting point is 00:28:12 Yeah, I just wonder what, yeah, I guess I hadn't really thought about what I would spend, what I would buy, like if I bought myself something nice, you know, have you started to think, I mean, well, you got yourself a house. Yeah, I rented it. Yeah, I didn't buy, yeah. But yourself a house. Yeah, I rented it. Yeah, I didn't buy it. Yeah, but that's nice.

Starting point is 00:28:26 Yeah, that's nice. Yeah, I don't know how to air balloon or something. Cool. I don't know what I would be fucking nice. Those are scary though. I'd rather go fast and get more of those. Yeah, but if you really master the art of it, I got a buddy that used to fly one and he can fucking that bitch would show the fuck up.

Starting point is 00:28:41 See, we're still not. You ever see these things crash? Huh? They come down on power lines and shit. It's so funny. Yeah, if you don't know what you're doing. Yeah. I think you got to get one of those D.

Starting point is 00:28:52 Yeah, pull up some crashes. Yeah, let's get some high up in the green. And some of them run on D's a lot, thank, huh? They catch fire too. Yeah. Yeah, it's scary. We're standing up for your old bedroom, a hot air balloon.

Starting point is 00:29:04 Not. Oh, look at this. It's scary. What's standing up for your old bedroom? I had an apple. Oh, look at this. Oh, some guy in his son. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on, Tater. Fucking balloon crash. The wind's picked up. Sometimes if people have a really thick son, their nickname is always like a starchy food. You ever noticed that? Yeah. Come on, Tater.

Starting point is 00:29:37 Tater. Get it done, cake pop. That's what the hell. Yeah. Yeah. Get in there. Pancake batter, They'll call them. It's my son. Pancake batter.

Starting point is 00:29:51 Come on batter. Get in the truck. We're gonna fly believe it. Hang on. I don't kick. Kick five. And you know one of their fans, there was definitely shot that missed out on the distance. That's also a risk, dude. Anyone could shoot you down anonymously. You can take those things out.

Starting point is 00:30:15 You'll never get caught. Yeah. Pull that up, man anonymously. Shoot the sound of hot air balloons. Watchers like 2000 videos of that. Get a Confederate flag, everyone. Ooh, that'd be cool. Yeah, let it fly. Get a target.

Starting point is 00:30:31 Go tough. Go tough on them. See who wants to shoot it down. You want to see who's. Reflying past like the, uh, buy you class. Get him fired up. But, dude, I will say this, if you hang one speaker out of it, playing Do the Stanky Leg, everybody will let you go.

Starting point is 00:30:52 No, fine. People will be like, oh, all right. Oh, there we go. Civil War, yeah. They had them. Yeah, what were the hot air balloons used during the Civil War for? They would just use it surveillance It's like spy plane. I think Napoleon used them first really maybe not first, but he was he was using It's like bombs with drones like we're talking about

Starting point is 00:31:14 Skated fuck out of you with the other side had that Both the Union and Confederacy used hot air balloons for reconnaissance to help determine the location of troops and artillery This innovation in aerial warfare was a trailblazer for its time. It took place 40 years before the invention of the airplane. Wow. But dude, imagine that it starts going down near the enemy. Oh, fuck. Can't turn it.

Starting point is 00:31:39 Hang on. Hold on. Kick by. No. I did. Oh, no, can't talk. Can't talk, no. I did. That kind of. It's just fucking heartbreak. Yeah, I don't ever lose.

Starting point is 00:31:51 You can't get, you don't want me. But imagine you run out of brain in one. Huh? Yeah, I've been in one. Really? Yeah, I've been in one. I was with my buddies, dad, and we were kids. He like proposed to this lady and one dude.

Starting point is 00:32:04 And she said, yeah? And she said no. And so then we're like, well what the fuck were? That's a tough, the rest of the trip. Yeah, and we're trying not to like act exciting because we're in there because we could tell like he was bummed out. It's tough to be bummed out on like the ledge of a hot air, but like looking away from them like,

Starting point is 00:32:23 try to be sad. Oh, I was sad, dude. And that guy's always he's been sad since then. There's a lot of videos of him online and he's always listening to that song. Big goes my hero. Who watch him as he goes to see his old self. That's the man I used to be. Yeah, Tiffany was his girlfriend's name. And she's like, I don't think so. That's how she said. What the fuck? It's like, yeah, it was like 70 more minutes we had to spend up there. Yeah. Because the tour guy, I think he didn't really play, know what was going on. So he just kept giving us the tour of like that. Oh, no. Yeah. Oh, it's shit like that. They're just makes you wonder

Starting point is 00:33:08 what. Yeah. I think that fucks people up like when you're supposed to be happy, like a cool, like a hot air balloon or like that kid jumping off the fucking cruise ship. Yeah. He's something like was that was supposed to be fun and good, get horribly ruined. Yeah. That gives from bad and rude Louisiana. We I don't know if we talked about that last time we're together, but maybe that kid was a good top. He was just partying and he jumped off and never seen the game. I never checked this shit out. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:33:30 But the craziest is people were like, that's a shark. There's like one little piece of like water. And it just looks like some white and like definite shark. Yeah. People make comments like that online. Oh, crazy. He would wake for a shark to munch him that quick. If impossible. I feel like they take the time, right?

Starting point is 00:33:47 Well, also the odds of shark is going to be right there at that moment. I do think sharks follow cruise ships. Surge called off. Oh, that's the toughest. Oh, that's the word. You got to regret that. You know, dude, something like that happened to me, man. It was when we had a guy who fell on a basketball court and died and we're kids. And when he fell, I yelled out like Reggie Lewis. Remember

Starting point is 00:34:25 there was like I read you Lewis that had died. Now Reggie Lewis, look him up if you can. Reggie Lewis. I tell him right there. Reginald C Lewis was an American professional basketball pair over there in B.A. Boston Celtics. That was it. Beautiful man right there. And he collapsed on the court. Who was there was another guy that did that too. That was like a, I think it was B. John's strong. He's real famous. Um, can I take Johnson? No, no. No, don't just name a black guy. No, no, no, don't just name a black guy. John's. No, this is what yeah, but this, but it happens to people, but he, yeah, this happened to him. And so we thought this guy just fallen down, it's tripped. And so I remember yelling that out, Reggie Lewis. And then they tried to revive him and he died. Oh, no,

Starting point is 00:35:17 I didn't jinx him. That's insane to say. I can't believe you put that on. I didn't jinx him. Look up if didn't jinx him. Look up if I jinxed him or not. I don't think he jinxed him. Yeah, that's heartbreaking. I'm sorry that I did that. Have you felt good about moving here? Now, once you moved here, was it kind of like different

Starting point is 00:35:37 or was it different than you thought? Like, what are some things that were kind of cool about it? I don't know. I, you know, when you move, I was sad for like a week. Oh really? Yeah, I was by myself. I was scared. I was used to having fucking, I was used to living in an apartment. I lived in Philly, New York the last decade. So I was like, it's usually somebody around. Now I was out there by myself. I got scared for a while. I was scared. Really? Get scared at night. Noises. Yeah. Yeah. You think it's a noise and you just, you farted.

Starting point is 00:36:05 It's just waking myself up on the floor. It's like, what the fuck was that? Yeah, I mean, I was scared for a while. Yeah. I was emotional about cry during movies when I was at night by myself. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:36:21 So that's what you have to look forward to. It's scary. You cry. That's it. Oh, that's just part of the American condition these days, then. Oh, you're fine, then. Yeah. That was all. Um, yeah, because I think I thought, I don't know if I thought natural would be a

Starting point is 00:36:35 busier comedy scene. I didn't think that, um, because they just have one club. It's like a functioning club there, right? It's like they have a headliner flies in every weekend. So they, they hope you as much as they can, but they just don't have as much space, you know? And then there's not a lot as many other rooms around the area, but here it's like,

Starting point is 00:36:54 yeah, it feels like you could go. Good metagallia, I said, you've done like five spots, you know? Yeah, you can do that here. It's like, wow. Yeah. I mean, that's crazy to think you could do that in a city. I mean, there was never maybe Chicago, you could do that in? Maybe, I don't there was never maybe Chicago, you could do that in.

Starting point is 00:37:05 Maybe, I don't know. New York, obviously, you can. Yeah. LA. LA, definitely. Those are the two. Yeah. But that was, yeah, I don't know.

Starting point is 00:37:14 Um, yeah, you can do it if you want. Yeah. Yeah. All right. This is going well. This is going well. What else we got? I'm trying to think about it.

Starting point is 00:37:23 A horrible death I can think of. Oh, dude, what about that? This is going well. This is going well. What else we got? I'm trying to think about it. A horrible death I can think of. Oh, dude, what about that? There was someone was looking at the other day. It was a pull up that, what's that death page on Twitter where they have a lot of deaths on there? It's an animal.

Starting point is 00:37:37 I thought it might even send it to you the other day. Oh, history photographs. We were looking at this picture back in the day they had to hang an elephant. Oh, there you go. To treat the cat. Just to look at the judicial system in the world, right? So this elephant, right?

Starting point is 00:37:53 The hanging of Mary the elephant, also known as murderous Mary, I guess a bad elephant, was publicly executed for killing her handler in 1916. It was meant to be a warning to other criminal elephants. So. There. Yeah. I mean that.

Starting point is 00:38:18 So it just, you gotta think the judicial abilities of human beings is always why. But I guess if you're another elephant, you gotta be like, I see what you mean going on here. Yeah, he's my fucking mean business, cause I mean, the idea though, the guy who was like, fucking hang that motherfucker.

Starting point is 00:38:40 Everyone else is probably fucking shooting the head. Behind closed doors, we'll just, we'll be done with this elephant Well, behind a huge close to make no We're doing make an example of this fucking elf. Yeah, yeah, not this bitch Murderous Mary not this bitch if you see what she's fucking doing Sprite did some pretty crazy shit. Yeah, this bitch right to one or gallons of fucking water. I had a friend who's a friend of their mother's was like a big elephant advocate. Like was like she was a rich lady.

Starting point is 00:39:11 So she was like, save the L. Oh, yeah, rich people do that. That was her cause. And then she's fine. They say to him so they save their animals. So then she was like, all right, she went to Africa to like her first trip to meet the elephants. And one of them fucking killed her. Fucking killed her. Paul, fucking killed her, dude. And they don't, I don't think people know about elephants, they don't kill you, it's not fun, they don't, it's, they ground you, they use their face

Starting point is 00:39:37 and fucking mush you into the ground. Oh yeah, it's like when you see people do like, the stone ground, yeah, into the flowering you see people do like that stone ground. Yeah, and the flower stuff. Yeah, yeah. I just, like their artisan chefs, Elephant Kills woman. They are. They'll grind you up. Oh, that's heartbreaking. Elephant Kills woman.

Starting point is 00:39:55 Oh, this is a different one, but yes, this is also a different one. Oh, oh,'s go back and read this. Elephant kills woman and returns to her funeral. Elephant kills woman and returns to her funeral to attack her corpse. Wow. Oh, oh, Disha India, bizarre animal stories are heard often. Maya Murmoo was collecting water and ripy village located in the Mayer, Banjant, dish, Mayer, Bihunj, district of Odisha, India, when our herd of elephants came her way. She tried to flee, but one of them rushed her. It's all that's hard break,

Starting point is 00:40:35 a man. Let me see. At the ceremony, it was taking place. The times when you reported that a herd of elephants appeared from the four sending villagers running, they left Mermoo's body behind. Wow. She had a liquid death. One. One of the elephants did reportedly attacked woman's court by picking up the body and throwing it in the air. Wow. Thankfully, there's a video.

Starting point is 00:41:05 Should I play it? Yeah. I don't know. Let's take a vote in the room. I mean, it's... All right, I'm not... Everybody said yes. Yeah.

Starting point is 00:41:13 That's gonna be... I didn't want to do it. Oh, man. Oh, this is just a... I think it's an aftermath. Yeah, I don't think they... I don't think they were... Oh, I'd just a I don't think they're Oh I'd be the worst I think if you had me came in your house

Starting point is 00:41:30 Yeah, be up there because even if you go in another room, it can just come right in there Yeah, I like it's used the door Yeah, I'd be so hectic man. I mean especially like at your mom's funeral. Yeah, you're like there's that motherfucker that did it Yeah, he's come back that did it. Yeah. He's coming back to fuck everybody else up too. Mm-hmm. You think you could do a big crime like that? Do a big murder?

Starting point is 00:41:51 I don't think I can murder. I don't think. Well, now, you think it's just an empty bottle of prime on your child's windowsill? Well, open it up and bam, there's some homemade lean topped off with a little mini cash and nerve gas. Who's that for?

Starting point is 00:42:13 Who's fucking with that hunter Biden? Yeah, that actually was. Oh, what's this here? That's a my little pony. No, that's a my little fintin' all stash. Yeah. That's all. Um, what else can we talk about, dude?

Starting point is 00:42:31 I don't know. That's about as good as it gets though. Hot air balloons. Yeah. Fucking elephants. But if you could do a murder or not, man. Yeah. I know God wouldn't want me to do it.

Starting point is 00:42:41 That would be the thing. Yeah. He would be like, don't do it, buddy. And I would be like, I'm not gunning. And then I would maybe sneak. I swear I'm not going to do it. If I'm under the table, so God can't see. The greed of the hot solo. They should have tables that are like God-resistant or whatever.

Starting point is 00:42:57 Like whatever happens under here, you know? Yeah. I remember girl and me feel her back one time at the library. We're kind of horny children or whatever. Yeah. I guess she didn't want me touching her breast. Whatever. I think maybe I don't I didn't know what was going on. That's good. She's like, you can feel on my back. Back's real good. And I actually remember this feeling her back. I'm gonna be a back man. Now you mentioned it. Fucking nice, huh? Robyn and ladies back. It's one big flat long tip

Starting point is 00:43:29 You know Yeah, let me get that flat. Let me get the small the small of the back put your hand there Oh, dude shit if you touched on the small of her back and her body her she felt warmer there You're like oh You know if like she was baking cookies in her butt or something. I felt always warmer there. You know what I'm talking about?

Starting point is 00:43:49 It is warm, yeah. Like, whoa, what am I doing down here? I mean, the first time a girl let me touch a small verb back in it's a hair on it, right? Cause her dad was really tough. And I was like, I don't care. I'll fucking pet this girl. Yeah, I don't mind.

Starting point is 00:44:03 I will pet this bitch. I'm in love. Girls sometimes girls have really hairy butts. Really? I don't care, I'll fuck a pet this girl. Yeah, I don't mind. I will pet this bitch, I'm in love. Girls, sometimes girls have really hairy butts. Really? Yeah. I think naturally girls sometimes have, I think they have to, they have to work on that. I don't.

Starting point is 00:44:15 Some of them get like man's ass. I don't think these are gonna trick. Let's not get tricked. Yeah. You can trick by some of that ass, but you know. Search girl, hairy asked girl. Yeah, bring something up. We have blockers on a lot of our stuff, but if you can get around some of it, maybe on Twitter,

Starting point is 00:44:32 can you are you allowed to show hair? I was looking for a picture, but read this top red at post. My girlfriend has a lot of hair on her ass. How do I approach this? Great question. Let's let's review this. Do you have a problem is that her asshole is very hairy. This is this? Great question. Let's, let's review this. Do you have a problem? Is that her asshole is very hairy? This is on ass women, by the way, the subreddit. If it bothers you so much, you can't be with her because of it. You have to straight up tell her about it.

Starting point is 00:44:56 Why is she getting all ratchet on the suddenly? Somebody just reported her. She's like, you got to straight up tell her about it. Period. Honey, your hairy ass hole disturbs me. He was the actual post. But I think your, um, I grew up in his beautiful and she does a great job of Mannecarran,

Starting point is 00:45:15 her lady bits. The problem is that her asshole, and they wrote it like that, is very hairy. It's kind of a turn off when I'm down there. A few wouldn't bother me, but this is a lot more than a few. Oh, how did you all start taking care of your nether regions? Did you read about it in a magazine or you just do it naturally? How should I approach this topic with her without getting her upset? I'm starting those magazines laying them around. Yeah,

Starting point is 00:45:39 which is taking a hairy ass shit. You can leave one in the bathroom. You, dude, hairy butt ladies. Harry ass shit, you can leave one in the bathroom. Dude, Harry butt ladies. You, Harry butt ladies, I know. You started bothering me again. I don't know if I would mind a little hair like on the hips, probably, I just think the actual cheeks if there were hair on them. The crack dude, not the cheeks, like a man's,

Starting point is 00:46:00 like an Italian man's ass. Like a fucking Jewish sideburn down there. Yeah. Getting into her Jewish tunnels. You see them coming out of the tunnels? What? Oh, I was just, Jesus, Jesus.

Starting point is 00:46:14 Yeah. Bring that up, dude. It's better to get some bad PR lately. Oh, bruh. This might be the worst one. It got come out of me. No, this is, I swear to God, I'm not being anti-Semitic. Dude, Jews do coming out of a

Starting point is 00:46:28 sore grade in New York. Oh, yeah. It's a video of that. And it's a New York sitting on a ruptured in a chaos Monday night. Let's play a bit of it. All right. That is tough to address. I know we're moving on to Jews and tunnels, but well, we'll finish it out there. Yes, warm finish out them. We'll go to this because I think, well, I think the tough, I will some people, they make hair on their bodies

Starting point is 00:46:50 to survive cold weather. Can you look that up, Zach? You know what I'm talking about? I think, yeah, I think that's what I was for. Yeah, so sometimes you don't want to have a wife that can't survive if you know, you don't want to put the AC at 60. It's always cold, yeah.

Starting point is 00:47:03 Yeah, you don't want to put the AC at 64 one night he's cold. Yeah, you don't want to put the AC at 64, one night and then she fucking did, she fucking did. And in the morning, you know. It's a good trade off. Would you accept your girl to never fucking complain about being cold, but she has to have a hair, yes. Or she complains every single fucking day. Now what if it were like stuffed animal hair?

Starting point is 00:47:20 That would be kind of fun. That would be nice. That I agree with. But I'm telling you, I've seen videos. These girls have fucking Italian man's ass. Like long hair? Like fucking dude, it looks like a dood's ass. Pull up something.

Starting point is 00:47:33 Oh no. Oh my god. Hmm. Well, that's more than I've ever seen. But. Oh wow, that's a lot, huh? You can't see this video on the audio, but there's just a black girl watching it with her mouth open. The same face we're all making. Yeah, oh my god. Ooh, all right.

Starting point is 00:47:59 Holy shit. Wow. I'm telling you, dude, they have Greek man's ass. Holy shit. Holy shit. Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo. Wow. I'm telling you dude, they have Greek man's ass. Wow, and who has that? Who has the most hair on their ass, is it? I've found a culture. I would say. Look that up.

Starting point is 00:48:18 And what do you do? How do you approach that? You've been training. How do you approach that with a woman? I don't know, I would never. But you've obviously dealt with it. No. And South Asian descent are reported to have a relatively high amount of body hair.

Starting point is 00:48:31 Mediterranean. Mediterranean. Middle Eastern and South Asian descent. Wow. Yeah, I think God, I just, because the crazy thing is to see if you feel it down or butt, and then you feel some hair there. But you have to still be hopeful for,

Starting point is 00:48:52 you know, I just think, yeah, what do you do? Yeah, I don't know how to address, my friend was talking to me about addressing his, he was a freighter's girlfriend, was gaining weight, and he was like, so I told her. And I was like, damn, I would never, I'd let her get fat and then resent her and break up with her. Yeah, I think so.

Starting point is 00:49:09 Who am I to criticize, but you know, you know, I think a lot of people do that. A lot of people, oh, I was, even if they're not getting weight or whatever, I think I was in, I stayed with a girl just because I hated her so much. I was like, well, if you, if I let you go, you might find happiness. I'm going to fucking make sure you're miserable too. And I feel horrible about that, but I was young. Yeah. And I was just that kind of fun. You know, I didn't know how to operate or be a decent

Starting point is 00:49:38 human at all. But yeah, pull up that ass again, buddy. Oh, yeah. It's the other cheek that gets here, because that cheek's already almost done. I love how one of the black girls I just keep closing more of your ass. Just more of it, dude. Oh, that's crazy, man. God. Yeah, but then I bet here, now we'll say this shame.

Starting point is 00:50:02 Think about a long time ago, 1300s, fours, or whenever early, right? And you get a woman and she has hair on her. Bet it feels good. I bet it does feel good, you know? I bet. Now if you're a fucking freak, you start petting in a little,

Starting point is 00:50:21 I, some of it is how you approach it. I could see that. You're like, oh, let me pet this fucking little haired hair, but. Oh, that's nice. That's fucking, do I sit up a little? Yeah. Hey, let me get a little, yeah, I can get real hard, which doesn't expect it to.

Starting point is 00:50:38 That's fun. Yeah. That's fun, dude. Dude, I got hair like on my legs, and I've been running a lot, bro, and it starts to get tangled up, and I'm like, what the heck? That's been, dude. Dude, I got here like on my legs and I've been running a lot, bro. And it starts to get tangled up and I'm like, what the heck? That's been pretty challenging. Do you wish you'd learned how to manage money in school? I do.

Starting point is 00:50:52 God, I didn't, you know. I was keeping up my money and my dang underpants drawing all of that. I forgot to cash checks. I need to cash them. And so I had dang 40 checks and pizza place I worked at went out of business and I lost a lot of that money, but it's hard. It's hard if you don't know about money, building credit and that sort of thing. Well, I can tell you that the build card from current will make banking and crediting a lot easier. When you get the build card from current, you can build credit safely while you bank. That's right. It's a secure credit card that lets

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Starting point is 00:53:40 They, I guess they had been building secret tunnels on your team. Through what the financial system? I mean, this is worst case for the Jewish people. Not really, not worse, but not even the worst thing in the last few. But all right. This is crazy, man. They do get after it.

Starting point is 00:53:59 Oh, they're crazy. Look at this one, dude. They get after it. This one that popped out of the floor right there. They popped it out of the floor right there And he's dant biggy walls Don't flip the pews brothers. Oh, it's just hectic man. They're fucking looking for the last Really fucking that guy looking for the last Yeah, fucking comfortable that guy was walking the plank

Starting point is 00:54:23 Yeah, bro, these people they were fine with this. Orte, this is orthodox Jewish group. And this incident, let me read the article. So the incident began Monday afternoon after a cement truck was sent to the Chabad Lubavitch world headquarters known as the 770 due to its address and crown heights according to COL Live. The truck was ordered to fill up an underground tunnel

Starting point is 00:54:43 that had run from the main synagogue to now close building next door, the outlet reported. First reports of the tunnel service in late 2023, after a homeowner had called a thorese about a suspicious noise is in his neighborhood, and that's draideling, isn't it, I think? I think of you in noises under your house. You can't just do it, you guys.

Starting point is 00:55:02 It's just somebody listening to modest Yahoo. I'm like, what's going on? You can't tell anyone. You can't be like, dude, I swear to God, It's just somebody listening to modest Yahoo Tell me why you can't be like dude. I swear to God. There's Jews under my fucking house Dude, I know there's Jews down there Dude you mean you need to put down the fucking internet Jews on everyone like that you mean underwriting your mortgage or what are you talking about? Like no, no, they're fucking in there You mean underwriting your mortgage or what are you talking about? No, they're fucking in there. I hear them.

Starting point is 00:55:25 They whisper. However, following excavation of a trench for the project, simultaneously a construction project was in progress to install new plumbing in the 770. However, following excavation, the underground tunnel had been discovered. The tunnel had reportedly been worked on during nights for an unknown amount of time, stretching the tunnel to a next door, building women's section. Ah.

Starting point is 00:55:50 That's nice. Yeah. Me, me and the fucking tunnel baby. Yeah. That's good. That's crazy, dude. And that's orthodox Jewish people. It appears so, yeah.

Starting point is 00:56:02 Those people are wild, man. We had a garbage man on, right? And from New York, and he said the worst people that he came across were over the Jewish people. New York, yeah. He said the kids would come out and tell them to just go fuck himself and flip them off. They look at them, they're getting rowdy with the guy. They were getting rowdy during COVID. I think I heard maybe those tunnels were so they could continue to go to synagogue during COVID. I think I heard maybe those tunnels were so they could continue to go to synagogue during COVID because they locked that down.

Starting point is 00:56:29 Right. Now that's what the media is saying. Well that right, right, right. And by the media we mean them. So here's the guy coming out of the great look. The guy coming out of the great is one of the most anti-Semitic things I've ever seen in my life, dude. Oh, wow.

Starting point is 00:56:48 Oh, no. Where is this guy coming, dude? To get a rebate. That's insane. Coming out of the grade. They started pepper spray in them. And pepper spray is not kosher, I don't think. Look it up. There's gonna be some loss.

Starting point is 00:57:03 But no, we had a go. We had a garbage man. And he said that for some reason those people were like kind of the coldest to him. What did he say, Zach? He mentioned that the kids would fuck with his truck and he hated going there. That was the main thing.

Starting point is 00:57:13 And he also just said they were rude. And also it was a new year. They throw all their shit out every year. Oh, yeah, that was part of it too, I think. So there's probably some anger for me because they had to pick up so much stuff like they do like a cleansing, I guess. I can say like it's part of tradition

Starting point is 00:57:25 to like reset everything. And when the new year like throw everything out and buy new. So like that day of the year, he would they said they would just go up and down the same street all day. Because you guys just stay at times. Yeah, you know, that's true.

Starting point is 00:57:37 Yeah, getting all new stuff, man. But they had this, is this, they had a group in, I don't know if it was in New York, it was like orthodoxers, people, they would move move into a neighborhood bring the value of the neighborhood down and then Buy up the other places and then bring it back up There was some log it was like a lawsuit that they made Or something Anyway

Starting point is 00:58:02 or something. Um, anyway. Uh, it's touchy subject, but there's no denying that there's tunnels that is funny. Oh, yeah. There's nothing we can do about, you know. We're not trying to be

Starting point is 00:58:17 Oh, why don't they go and be in bad people are you think? Because the, yeah, these guys popped up out of a fucking tunnel. Anybody got out of town? I'm funny. It's fucking insane. It's fucking insane. You ever see the video of El Chapo? It was a game in prison?

Starting point is 00:58:28 It's great. Anybody going in and out of a tunnel is hilarious. Yeah. He goes into a tunnel like behind a toilet. He just escapes. Did you see the one that's like some guy in his trailer, right? And a method comes up through just like the vent in the floor that he has like, you know, like, and it's like looking for something so startling.

Starting point is 00:58:47 And the guy's like, what in the fuck are you doing in here? Somebody coming out, coming out of the forest. Fuck so scared. Is it not going to come out like smiling? They're going to come out. It's a bunch of fucking ninja turtles, dude. Oh, is this it? Yeah, Tapa. You find it. The finally the time is right. Super Mario is right out

Starting point is 00:59:10 He's gone dude. He's going wow Dirty Banana You got Mexican you got make it Mexican somehow You got Mexican, you got to make it Mexican somehow. Bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum bum I think I'm fucking stocked. I think I go to jail, I mean jail. There's no getting out. Fuck man. I can't get out. Baw.

Starting point is 00:59:48 Longer baskets too small. Yeah, but Warden, you big boss man, you look like a big boss man. Obviously you're gonna play him in a biopic. Biopic. No, I think I'm in there. How are you getting out? Damn. God damn it.

Starting point is 01:00:04 God damn it. God damn it. So, and look, this goes back. No, you dare fake that. You car so good. Just zoom in on that big with the one you already have this biggest please. If you don't mind, let's just get a gander at this fella. Oh, Shane. I get it. Get out there.

Starting point is 01:00:23 Bro, that's your hot air balloon to success right there jump on So if I'm feeling bad at the gym at home mostly at home. It's time. That was some Brazilian barbershop and they keep tagging me at home. It's time. That was some Brazilian barbershop and they keep tagging me and shit. Yeah. But it's some kid. And I was Brazilian.

Starting point is 01:00:48 For those, you don't know, shame put like a, he made, he saw this hand signal, what is it? It was great. My friend Billy sent it to me and then I sent it to a Gabe Davis who plays with Bill. And it's just a hand signal and take talk of a kid. It's just a chubby kid doing a funny, he was actually, I didn't realize it.

Starting point is 01:01:04 It was a barbershop so he's showing off his Fade, that's what the next scene is so the first scene is him going And then it cuts to him with his new haircut It was fun Gabe Davis did it. Yeah shout out to the boy Gabriel, but yeah, it is a nice thing to do it feels good. What does just doing that First thought so you hit up Gabe Davis and he says okay, this is crazy. I'll do it How many times you hit up Gabe Davis a lot? Okay, I talked to him a lot, but I didn't I didn't think he was actually Ever gonna do it gonna do it. Yeah, and you said you got to do this. It'll be good

Starting point is 01:01:50 Yeah, and he was like yeah, I'll do it and I was like I don't know like I figured the adrenaline a score in a touchdown would he forget take over Yeah, especially that was a nice play He remembered for me. Wow what a sweet man. Bro, how good did you feel when he did this? I was strange here. Right here. I was so fucking happy. I was so, I'm, I'm, it's probably the happiest I've been in a long time. Oh, that's how you jumped off my couch.

Starting point is 01:02:14 I was like, oh, you did it. Oh, you got a vomit on somebody's kid when that happens. Yeah, there's no kids around. I would have. I almost went into the tunnels. I was down there peaked in the tunnels. Yeah, it's great amount. Yeah, what the fuck were those guys doing?

Starting point is 01:02:32 It's on levels. It's New York too. Like you don't need everything's pretty close. Probably just hunting square footage dude. I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm gonna be okay. Like this could be another thing. Square feet. That's fucking crazy. But doing. Like this could be another thing. That's where I think.

Starting point is 01:02:47 That's fucking crazy. But that had to be unbelievable, dude. I think there's just something crazy if you can have an influence on sports. Cause sports are such like this. Like, it just feels like such this. I guess every man wants to do it. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:02:59 You know, you give anything to be able to run and catch it. Yeah. You know, and you just can't, you know. There's no part of me that can do it. Mm. Yeah, I wonder how I get out of prison probably. I'd, first of all, I go in as a woman. And people, people like you ain't no woman, bitch.

Starting point is 01:03:19 That's what somebody would say to me. I'm like, what? Yeah, that's all good. She pelted that. Oh, you'd have to pull it right up the gate, right? She pelted that. You said that. He's like, I'm gonna go to jail as a woman.

Starting point is 01:03:30 And he's like, first day, I'm like, give me that fruit cup bitch. Like, he's act out of, put the best up in some fucking party. But these days, you can't say, I guess you're not a woman, you know? Well, here's what I think they should do. And I thought about this a lot.

Starting point is 01:03:43 Like, especially, I don't understand why the mixed martial arts doesn't start with a, um, a trans division. Yeah, it'd be awesome. Yeah, because it's like, then you can champion these trans fighters. You can let them embrace and share what it's like. Cause otherwise, you just kind of hodgepodge in a man. Yeah. And then it's a lot of dudes, if they really wanna go play ball, they're gonna have to go play ball.

Starting point is 01:04:09 You can't just, you know, sump over to the woman side. Yeah. You know, and be fucking bringing your hair butter over there to the fucking play section. You gotta actually, like if they had a trends division,

Starting point is 01:04:22 I would pay, I feel like I would pay $4 extra month to see the trends bounce. Yeah. Or, you know, I feel like it would be, it'd be on, on, on precedent. It'd be fun. Yeah. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:04:34 Yeah. I like to see him in the women's sports. You do? I think, yeah. Some man in there. Yeah. Just fucking shit up. Fucking great. But here's what they should though on the TV.

Starting point is 01:04:49 It should every now and then to say, have an era say this is a man. They need to start doing like Monday night football intro for every female sport. So you can tell. I mean, yeah, it's like, hi, I'm Mary. I went to UCLA. Frank. Purdue. Oh, yeah, that's the one there.

Starting point is 01:05:12 I wonder he's got 48 points in the first day. Yeah, he's like Rick, women's college of design. Wesley and you're like, what? That's that's that's Cal. That is a hair butt. That's a hair butt. People don't talk about that. Those are, yeah, post game showers with the, with the,

Starting point is 01:05:33 with the, God see, that would be, that is a reason I think I would go experiment with trans and or whatever, because you get to get in those showers, dude. But I bet in some of the sports, it's, it's not that rewarding. But I bet in some of the sports, it's not that rewarding. I'm sure in some of the sports, you know, you think? I think some of those female locker rooms, I wouldn't be too excited as much. Like if I got into like college volleyball, if I could trick my way into that, that'd be a good shower for them.

Starting point is 01:06:02 I mean, for me, of you, that's literally a nightmare. Me fucking naked from a college volleyball team is a nightmare. You have to be so embarrassed. But you have to get your breasts pierced probably to like at least blend, you know, because some of the chicks are tough nowadays and then you probably have to draw on a little more tear to use like a shadowing cream. I can tip side, I'd be okay. But yeah, having a just a tiny cock in there would probably through, you know, call it a long pussy. That would talk.

Starting point is 01:06:31 And they're women. You could trick him. I guess he has a long pussy. Yeah, well, people have been tricking him pretty. It's like a meal. Yeah, hards, husband. He bought her that plane. Do you know that?

Starting point is 01:06:43 No. He bought the plane. A lot of people all know that. Yeah. So yeah, I can say it makes sense. What are we doing? Yeah. Oh, man, what else can we talk about, dude?

Starting point is 01:06:57 Anything else in the news that? Yeah, you were talking about this earlier. You've brought this up before. Consumer reports found widespread presence of plastic soon food. Oh yeah. Well dude, that's what they said. You know they had that article,

Starting point is 01:07:11 and we've talked about this before. This says, the nonprofit consumer group said on Thursday that 84 out of 85 super market foods and fast foods that recently tested contained plasticizers known as phallids. Phallids. A chemical used to make plastic more durable. foods and fast foods, it recently tested contained plasticizers known as... Failates. Failates. A chemical used to make plastic more durable. I've heard of failates a lot lately.

Starting point is 01:07:31 Yeah. How are you fucking saying it? Fathelates. Yeah, I've heard people saying it a lot. But I never understood what it was. Well, this is one of the issues that say, it says, Fathelates and vice,

Starting point is 01:07:42 vice, vice, vice, vice finals can disrupt the production and regulation of estrogen and other hormones, potentially boosting the risk of birth defects, cancer, diabetes, infertility, neurodevelopment disorders, obesity,

Starting point is 01:07:59 and other health problems. The bastard's got me. I didn't do any failings. I got it dude. No wonder they're running off through the tunnels dude. They got me. So bro, when you think about this, right, that the stuff that we're eating and if there's so much contamination just like in the land, in the water, that's what's making like people sick.

Starting point is 01:08:27 What else? ADHD, genetic disorders, all kinds of stuff. Bobby Kennedy talks about that, about how many things are linked to it, you know, that he thinks anyway. We might have got in under the buzzer. You and me, we were the last close. Now all the kids have it. Oh dude. Right on the board. I think we both got it something but not the whole thing. Everybody you meet has an autistic child now. It's unbelievable. You know it's almost um you know and people have nicknames here's our little ring came they call them or something you know like because a lot of them are really like perceptive you know but they don't really say much. Yeah, yeah, that's unbelievable.

Starting point is 01:09:07 But that's all I wanted to come out. Sometimes I think about, what if we made like a product or something that we knew wouldn't have that in it? Like what if we just said, hey, we're, we want to sell you this water. Yeah. And we promise your kid will not have autism. We promise. Autism free water.

Starting point is 01:09:26 Because as a country, we would like to say at the very least, you deserve to have autism free water. Now we're talking. Now that's a business. Although I do think we are gonna need autistic kids. Oh yeah. I mean, when the future is all just technology, and we're going to cyber war with fucking China,

Starting point is 01:09:48 we're gonna want those guys. Yeah. We're gonna need them. Yeah. You know what I mean? Oh definitely. Yeah, I think well a lot of the business is now run by like people that some people say could have some autism.

Starting point is 01:10:00 You know, a lot of there's a lot of speculation that Jeff Bezos has it. Zuckerberg Bezos Mosque. Zuckerberg Bezos, Mosque. Zuckerberg definitely. Yeah. Mosque, um, yeah, certainly seems like he has some. Who else, dude? Dennis Allen that coaches the saints.

Starting point is 01:10:16 Yeah. Um, who else? That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true.

Starting point is 01:10:24 That's not true. That's not true. Oh, that's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not true. That's not Eric. It's a party in that kids room every time. Every time I get in running a read that kid lives in Las Vegas. Yeah. Um, do you think about moving back from here? You think you're settled in? You're good. I don't know.

Starting point is 01:10:55 I don't think I live here forever. But yeah, I like it. Yeah. What? That's just a big. I don't, yeah. I, I don't know. I'll probably move home to like outside of Philly.

Starting point is 01:11:07 Wow. Yeah, eventually. Yeah. Yeah, I like it up there. The brotherly city, huh? Mm-hmm. The city really a brotherly? It depends, yeah.

Starting point is 01:11:17 It depends how shitty things are in the next 10 years. Yeah, what do you think the next 10 years of life is like in America? Do you think it's bad? I don't know. Yeah, the bombs Somebody's got fixes problem. I don't know what it is. Which problem the bombs dude other bombs. There's a lot of bombs Yeah, I say arm them That's where I'm at and send them yeah and send them all towards the big like Businesses that's what I would do. Oh

Starting point is 01:11:46 Is that crazy that's messed up? No, no, no, give them guns. Tell them not guns. I wouldn't say. Oh, you're well, even worse like machetes and shit. What type of arms? Something if they're well behaved, it turns into a weapon. So like, yeah, like a bow staff that has maybe a blade on the end, but they have to put both hands on it And it can tell if you're being good or not. You test your heart rate. Yeah, it's too high because you're not good enough.

Starting point is 01:12:10 Yeah, and you need low heart rate. Warriors. Who's on hand? I don't like using the term box. I like using the term boots on the ground. Because our boots on the ground. Those are boots on the ground. He rose of society and stepdads. Yes.

Starting point is 01:12:30 So you talking given Ninja Turtle weapons to, it's almost guys, just see what happens. Oh, I'm talking given the fucking, the Donatello I, the I, what's it called? A rag for your eyes, like a thing that holds your eyes in, but it doesn't, it's like a, Sorrow mask. Yeah, it's a rag for your eyes like a thing that holds your eyes in, but it doesn't. It's like a, yeah, Zora mask. That would be good.

Starting point is 01:12:50 And lead him to get any leaders. You could do it. You think I can lead the bumps? Yeah, I'll get you a horse. Horse would be big. They would respect a horse. They're like fucking the Aztecs. You can't.

Starting point is 01:13:01 I'm just a guy on a horse. They'll be like, this guy, he's a god. Yeah. Somebody rolls up on a horse, yeah, definitely. Yeah, I'm just sure. They are impervious to a lot of fucking damage. Horses? No, the horses, well, homeless people, yeah, they get fucking walk through tasers.

Starting point is 01:13:16 Well, they've been infected by so much. They've battled so many things. We got tased after a show in Shreeport. And here's the crazy part. I started doing comedy in Louisiana. And so we go to some non-Shreeport. And here's the crazy part. I started doing comedy in Louisiana. And so we go to some non-Streeport and afterwards, this was for 15 years ago, it's a, hey, man, we'll tease you if you want. You know, the cops will come up and tease people in the bar because there's not a lot of like nightlife. So here I am 15 years later, shows

Starting point is 01:13:43 over. We're sitting around with a couple of officers in one of them goes, with a couple of off-duty police people. Yeah. And one of them goes, hey man, we'll tell you if you want. And I was like, no fucking way, you guys are still doing this, yeah. And they lit us all up.

Starting point is 01:13:59 We got it together as a group and locked on. Oh, nice. Like a Harvey Milk kind of thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then they lit us up. How'd it feel to hurt? You know, it's not as bad as you would think. At all.

Starting point is 01:14:11 At all. It's definitely a little bit of a surprise, you know? Yeah. So I feel weird. It feels like somebody in the fucking like, great beyond pressed a fucking doorbell that you didn't know was connected to you, you know? Yeah, it's actually really, yeah.

Starting point is 01:14:29 But the pain, it's not as painful, it's just as surprising as could be. It's like extremely surprising. They can go through the tasers, they can go through a lot. Well, they're immune to a lot of disease. Yeah. Well, at a certain point, that would be a lot of society too, is, you know, we'd all be out there just,

Starting point is 01:14:46 I don't know. We wouldn't be, you'd be immune all the things because you are still alive on the street. And you'd want to probably strike back against the rich. Where do, when we do this? Okay. Where do we meet up? That's a question I want to know. And that's a big question. I think a good, there's good cities for this. Austin's a very good city. Where do you meet up for the revolution? The mothership, dude. Sixth Street. six street. That's perfect. Oh, have a bar military would overdo. I know.

Starting point is 01:15:30 Okay. On fucking fireball. Right. But before we even made it to the first 5G tower. Okay. We're going to there's going to be some attrition. There's going to be some guys going. Well, it's going to be tough keeping the troops together. Dude, I wouldn't call like I was to sink some attrition. There's gonna be some guys going, eh, well, it's gonna be tough, keeping the troops together.

Starting point is 01:15:45 Dude, I wouldn't call it like I was a sink carrier, okay, all night. Somebody going. We're going to six street. We're taking that out. The bomb's rising up on six. Okay, now that's, if we take six street out, that would be, now that I like. Yeah. And you're gonna recruit a lot of, um, a lot of talented young people.

Starting point is 01:16:03 You could probably get, you know, some of the Texas long horns, maybe. Oh, that'd be good. Yeah. Queen Ewers, he's staying another year, he joined probably. I thought we were just recruiting homeless people. But I think other people are gonna get jealous when they start to see you doing well. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:16:19 They're like, I'll fuck out, they'll do it. The masks and the swords and shit. Yeah, because Sig Ep is gonna be nothing against the fucking homeless batt swords and shit. Yeah, because Sig app is gonna be nothing against a fucking homeless battalion. Oh, what? Sig app might be number one. We might go down flat row and just... Yeah, I don't want the boys getting into a sorority.

Starting point is 01:16:36 I will say no soror. I'll command them. I'll say leave the Queens alone. Yeah, leave the one with the Queens alone. Isn't it? Now if you want to get into into some of these young fellas. Rock these boys, dude. And that's up to you, dude.

Starting point is 01:16:50 If you want to get into some fucking sigma for Epstein over here and see what these fellas are doing, that's the bum army is going to be tough to control. But I don't think control is the one turning. I know, but they're gonna get loose. They're gonna fucking every victory. They're gonna break everybody. But they're fucking turn on each other right away. They won't change.

Starting point is 01:17:19 They will, dude. No, they will. I've seen them support each other. I've seen, I saw a. I've seen I saw a bum high like living in a sofa like in the cushion in the bottom part and I saw a guy come and talk him in the bed one night in the park in your My house You don't see that in America anymore Dude they had some bums by us and because we live right by a park and they stole a bunch of high school music equipment,

Starting point is 01:17:46 I guess. So all night they'd be in the fucking park. I guess some of them stole the sheet music too, right? So it's so nice. It's 3 a.m. and you hear somebody on a flute just playing. It's like love the way you live. I like him and him and Rihanna. Like him and him and Rihanna. Buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh, buh,? I'm saying it, yeah, I think that's a good location. Okay, that's one. Somewhere on six street. Okay, that's fair. You can get a battalion there. You can't say, you have to have a location.

Starting point is 01:18:32 You can't have, you can't have homeless or semi-homeless people storming a fucking, you know, for a shitty ice cream or something. I thought we were just meeting. I think it would be a good test to try to get the mother ship because then you got Rogan in there. Okay. You got his team of security.

Starting point is 01:18:49 Yeah. You got to do. Yeah. It's probably to be the chef. You got to test your fucking might against them. What do you mean the good first battle against who the local police and send the bombs into the mother ship and see who wins? It's going to be a test.

Starting point is 01:19:02 Oh, Dave, we're never going to work there again. This is not a good choice. Not the mother ship. Yeah. No, I think you can beat up. I'm trying to think where would you lead your bum arm? You can meet up out front of it. Well, I think if to pick like five or six places in America is to meet up.

Starting point is 01:19:19 So I think you're going to have for sure. KNA and Philadelphia. That's the street. It is? Yeah. KNA and Philadelphia. That's the street. It is? Yeah. KNA and Philly. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:19:29 Kensington. Kensington and what? Algane. And Algane. Yeah. You get them in there. Well, crossing the Algane that goes all the way back to the 1912, dude. Or whenever sometime around then.

Starting point is 01:19:39 Crossing the, yeah, the Delaware, yeah. This is the army. They're fucking, they're in camp to right now. Oh, hell yeah. And it says no one deserves what's brewing in Kensington. Now, the tough part is to keep your army excited. You were gonna need over the counter meds probably or under the counter.

Starting point is 01:19:58 I don't know which one it is. I think they're getting over. Okay. I think over the counter led them there. But it's crazy that the people who are, because society has led people to believe, be in this space, you know? I mean, I think, you know, even just that family,

Starting point is 01:20:15 that did all sold all the drugs, whatever, the opioids. Sacklers. Yeah, you have the Sackler family who killed hundreds of thousands of people to have pills. That's the first place you have to attack. The Sacklers? Yeah. Right? Yeah, they kind of, they don't deserve to be alive really. Do they? I mean, no. Yeah, I think it'd be a fair thing to say. You don't think they deserve.

Starting point is 01:20:39 If you had to say no, if you had to pick someone who didn't deserve to be alive, they're up there. Yeah. Top. So you got to go get them first. Now once you get them, if you had to pick someone who didn't deserve to be alive, they're up there. Yeah. So you got to go get them first. Now, once you get them, you're going to have a lot more people are going to join them. Army for sure. So, okay. So we meet up in Austin. What other places?

Starting point is 01:20:54 Buffalo would be good. Those are some sturdy ones. Oh, yeah. Buffalo, you get those and you get those people that do the thing where they throw the baby into the pizza oven or whatever. Who's that family? What? You know what I'm talking about in the parking lot?

Starting point is 01:21:08 No. They like crisp and crisp and crisp and whatever. It's called, it's like, they put that. Who's the family that makes the pizza? Ha ha ha. Can you look it up? Google that. And they got the burn ins on on the four-year-old

Starting point is 01:21:25 or whatever out there. They made a bait. They burnt a baby. They put the fucking sauce on his back or whatever. Who is it? Jack, it's a family of whites. They're famous up there. Who is it?

Starting point is 01:21:37 Oh, come on. Is this the peak? Is this your target now? Yeah, which is last name? Oh, Pinto Tailgate. That's what I'm talking about. Wait, what are you talking about? Pinto Tailgate, man. These motherfuckers. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:21:47 You tell me they're gonna burn a kid. They don't burn. They fucking just when it's kind of when it's not as hot, when it's still warm, they fucking. There's a, I think it's some sauce on you. It's a big. Oh, they're crisping a kid with pizza sauce. Yeah. Oh, that's nice. Yeah, it's Pinto tailgate, man it big? What the fuck? Oh, they're crossing the kid with pizza sauce? Yeah, that's nuts. Yeah, it's Pinto Hotel game, man. Beautiful what they're doing up there. So you've got to meet here. So that's one place.

Starting point is 01:22:10 Where else do you meet, you think? That's enough, maybe. That is. It was enough information for now. Yeah, my bad on saying we should send the bombs in to the mothership. No, I think look. I'd be a tough one to get in.

Starting point is 01:22:25 That's what I'm saying. There's a lot of security in there. Oh, that's a good point. That's what I'm saying. It's a good first round. You know what I mean? Week one. I supported actually.

Starting point is 01:22:33 I said we send a, yeah, you dispatch a unit. See how they do. Yeah. Then we test to see, say that's like the final boss. We'll see how we can do against some crack security and guys with guns. Oh, yeah, you never, yeah, you're never gonna be able to beat fucking little Debbie or fucking Nextel or any of the Facebook. If you can't take out,

Starting point is 01:22:54 what comp? How do you call him? Do you feel like we could really end up in our lifetime as heading to a revolution or some sort of a place where people, where it all topples over, you know? Because all it takes is really, I've thought about this, all it takes is a pulley, like a couple of people like at a pulley,

Starting point is 01:23:14 like police stations, all it takes to cover people to be like, hey, I'm not gonna follow the rules anymore. Yeah. And once they, and then other people, I'm not gonna, this guy, and then it's just nobody's, because we're kind of getting there

Starting point is 01:23:25 It feels like you know I feel like kind of people just kind of Or like if nobody's gonna follow the rules and water everybody's kind of getting there it feels like sometimes maybe I'm wrong You know, maybe I'm just making exciting for the conversation. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know how wrong you are People are out there not falling rules. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if that, I don't know how wrong you are. People are out there not following rules. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know if that's gonna start a revolution, but yeah. But at a certain point, if enough people say, okay,

Starting point is 01:23:51 I'm not gonna drive within the lines, right? Yeah. I'm not gonna follow the speed limit. It's almost just like that. Like every now and then, like that has immediate consequences for whoever's doing it. They're gonna crash, usually, you know? But if enough people are like, well, fuck it,

Starting point is 01:24:04 I'm not waiting because there's an emergency up there. I'm not gonna wait for an hour. I'm just gonna do what I want. But it's just that whole attitude. If I'm just gonna do it. And then- Other countries do that.

Starting point is 01:24:13 Yeah, 80. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You go in the traffic jams and shit there. Like in India, you know, you were watched that. Oh, they do. Yeah, people, yeah. And they're doing all right. Yeah, you just wonder what's gonna happen, they did. Yeah, people. Yeah. And they're doing all right. Yeah, you just wonder what's going to happen, you know? Yeah. Um,

Starting point is 01:24:29 what else can we talk about? We talked about all. I feel like we, what's going on with you? What's going on with me, man? Not too much, dude. What's going on? Yeah, thinking about touring and just how to do it, you know, that's been something. I was thinking about, yeah, I've been thinking about that. I've been thinking about that a lot. Like, do I want to go spin? Like some people do a big tour, you know, and I like, and they go to the big cities and stuff like that, but I would almost rather do like a three year tour and go as I want.

Starting point is 01:25:07 It's kind of what I'm doing, yeah. And just make it as you want to do it. Yeah. It just feels like more manageable to me. And yeah, so that, I think I've been thinking about that. Um, what else? I've been thinking about getting, building like a halfway house or something like that.

Starting point is 01:25:24 That'd be nice. Yeah, it'd be pretty cool. Yeah. And then those people could be in the military. Those are our officers, dude. That's our officer training school. Yeah, dude, definitely. So, I mean, honestly, that's something I've been thinking a lot about. What else on a person, like on a personal side? Not much dude supposed to go to Iowaska really yeah in a couple days In a couple days are you going South America? Where you going? No, it's right off. It's right off It's right. It's like right off the interstate of knowing They're doing Iowaska. Oh, you can smell that. Yeah, I mean there's a pop-up like fucking probably no jokes 600 yards

Starting point is 01:26:03 Oh, that's gotta be so nice. Well, twice a day, I guess I do the biscuit bakes or whatever. I should smell that. Oh, no, it's not, you're not like, it's not fun high. I've heard, yeah, what's, you got a problem? God is crawling in and out of your wieners. Like, it's just a lot.

Starting point is 01:26:17 It feels like a lot. It feels like you're just like in therapy for like two, like, what does it feel like? You know, like, what does it feel like? You know, like, say if somebody was playing basketball in an attic of a house, right? It would feel kind of weird, maybe, because you're like, the floor feels like,

Starting point is 01:26:32 oh, it's, but if this feels like you're playing like basketball, like in a, like, on the first level, like, it's just like, not to make any sense, but it feels like, I don't know, it's just intense. You've done it. Yeah, yeah. And it, did you feel like it went well when you got done? Yeah, it's just crazy, yeah.

Starting point is 01:26:52 I mean, it's like God shows up and you're fucking sitting there with him, you know? But it feels really real, it's not like you're fucked up when you're like, you know, let me see that, you know. I took a fucking ton of mushrooms once and not that that's the same as I was. But I did reach the fucking, like, I'm not here anymore.

Starting point is 01:27:08 I'm just fully seeing things. Yeah. Yeah. I came out of it, I was like, I'm gonna be better. And then I'm fucking wore off, I'm back. Yeah. I'm the exact same guy.

Starting point is 01:27:20 So that's the thing I think I wanted to see. Yeah, I just wanted to wear off. It's been like a year and a half since I did it. Yeah. So I've been thinking about that. Yeah, so what a cool. Yeah, I've been thinking about that. I don't know.

Starting point is 01:27:33 Sometimes I think about maybe moving or getting a, also living somewhere else. I think it's fun to spend time down here. Austin is cool. It's cool. You can do stand up. It's a beautiful city. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:27:42 It's just like, it's a fun city. Yeah, there's a lot of neat stuff. Yeah, there's a lot of neat stuff, I think. So that's been pretty cool. Just thinking about it, you know, even's coming to see in like your house, it's like, Oh, okay, this is what it would be like to live here. This seems like I could do this, you know? Um, what else, man? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I think it's just, yeah, thinking about like who would be fun to talk to on podcasts? Stuff like that. This is normal stuff.

Starting point is 01:28:12 Yeah. Yeah, I don't, I'm not doing anything. I don't know how to answer that either. It's tough. Who would be fun to talk to? No, I mean, just like what's going on? Yeah. I don't know, I don't know.

Starting point is 01:28:23 I don't know. Anything you can think of, Zach, that you notice from an outsider's perspective about you? Yeah, sometimes I'm just so in my own life, you know, you don't know what's going on. We're trying to get new interesting guests for the pod. And then we're trying to get a carnival worker. Yeah, we're trying to get a carny.

Starting point is 01:28:39 We thought about Gypsy Rose. What did I've heard a lot about Gypsy Rose do? She convinced she got a boyfriend to kill her mother like a ranged. Yeah, and it's not funny. You know, I'm talking to myself because I just laughed, but, um, yeah, she and her boyfriend killed the mom. Her mom made her pretend that she was like mentally challenged and stuff in a wheelchair.

Starting point is 01:29:03 The mom had my chausen by proxy. So it was me triggering her into thinking she was sick mentally challenged and stuff in a wheelchair in physical handicap. The mom had munchows and by proxy, so it was tricking her into thinking she was sick and had all these ailments. I think I've heard of this from a long time ago. Yeah, there's like a TV series about it. It's been a lot of information about it, but she's also from Louisiana. So I was like, I wonder if it would be interesting

Starting point is 01:29:17 to talk with her and just see like what her life has been like, but I know she did another podcast and I don't know. If it's, you know, stuff like that supposed to happen, then it'll just happen. And that's the moment she just kept making it. She just made her pretend she was in a wheelchair and dress up like a little clown and stuff like that. It feels like self-defense at that point. Yeah, I think that's what they, yeah, and her boyfriend, I think, oh, she like met a guy

Starting point is 01:29:46 somewhere and his name, yeah, and they made love somewhere too. He's still in jail. This guy's still in jail. Yeah, that guy should be in jail. He should. He should be in jail. He looks like he's growing his beard out just so he can eat it. That's the kind of look that he has.

Starting point is 01:30:07 So yeah, anyway, yeah, that's her. But we try to get a carnival worker. And what problem did we run into? This you were running into with carnies is the, a lot of work and maybe working on a weekend. Like usual. Yeah. A lot of the carnival industry, except like,

Starting point is 01:30:23 they're working. There's no days off. Oh, dude, but still, it's gotta be a fun life. Keep it praying at night up on all those little fish stay alive. So you can make fun the next day. Those fish must, how many fish are those guys going through?

Starting point is 01:30:39 Some things must be dying so much. And then if they die, probably making a little, little bitty like for lays with them. Yeah, they probably watch those. Oh, definitely snacking on those bitches. Yeah, but that's so we've been looking for a carnival. The problem with carnival people is carn, the carnival's gone fucking AWOL man. They don't have any animals anymore. First of all, it's a lot of virtual shit and like gay guys like pretending to be animals which you can get in and fucking anyway, you can get in Miami or Bourbon Street.

Starting point is 01:31:11 And then it's very I guess more Disney on ice or something. You can't find any of the good motherfuckers, you know. Like I remember there was a guy, we used to live by the fair that would come through town, right? So if you went the day early for it open, for a quarter you could do a ride, right? And you were basically practicing. People would disappear, people would go fucking missing. People would get wiped up. Your fucking chicks would get wiped up

Starting point is 01:31:40 by a lot of these carnival workers and everything, but you could go practice, you know? And like, I remember one time I was getting off of a ride, and I guess I grabbed two rails at the same time, and it completed a circuit. And so I could, I was just like this, you know? And this black guy I remember goes, get on out of here, you, and he called me the in,

Starting point is 01:32:03 where he put his foot on my back and thank God. He kicked me. He saved you. God there. So yeah, you shouldn't, you should, you should see any good electrocuted is so fucking funny. Oh, well, it's surprising. And it's happened to my cousin.

Starting point is 01:32:17 He was laying, he was fixing a, like the VCR laying on the floor. And he's a big, he's big. Yeah. And he was fixing it. And he was laying on a wire. I guess that was exposed.R. laying on the floor and he's a big, he's big. Yeah. And he was fixing it. And he was laying on a wire. I guess that was exposed. Yeah. And while he was fixing it, he just stopped and was like, he's huge. We're all like, the fuck are you doing? Get up. Like no one was like, he's dying. Everyone's like, what the fuck dude? Stop. Yeah. That's it. That's one of the worst things that happens when people get elected. It's people like call them pull. It sees a lot or like quit doing all that gays.

Starting point is 01:32:48 People say stuff like that. You know, like shaking. Yeah, you shaking for it. Yeah. This ain't a time to laugh, Rodney. They're a woman's screams and then you realize it's serious. As far as I just remember, unless you're ever been women in their house.

Starting point is 01:33:02 Without women, they are a fucking, they are an alarm. They're like dogs. Yeah. They scream the second something anything is happening. They know something scream You know something's going on. That's a great point Manor just like hey, what the fuck's going women screaming during a like a fight Yes, hot it hurts I've seen, I'm Get your ass beaten having your girl scream while it's happening Just whoever's beat you up is terrorizing your whole family unit

Starting point is 01:33:32 Yeah, that's a crazy thing. I watch in five videos is when the girl Like just yelling on the side Oh, stop it You support me. You almost got it at your girl. Go sit in the car or, now what if your girl tays the fucking dude in this start? That would be awesome. It started yelling just like biggie lyrics at him as shit.

Starting point is 01:33:54 Tends which lyrics, but actually at that point, if you're using a taser in the middle of a fight, that feels like a pass. Yeah. You could say all the lyrics. Yeah, definitely I think. You know? Yeah.

Starting point is 01:34:04 Yeah, I think having your girl, knowing your girl's taste are ready is fucking hype shit. Women screaming, it bothers me doing basketball games. Oh yeah. The scream, football games, is it, you know, they get excited and scream so loud. Oh, it's ridiculous. My buddy took me to watch his son play football, right?

Starting point is 01:34:21 And there's just band of women behind us, okay? One of them has a megaphone that doesn't fucking, it just makes him sound like Stephen Hawking, right? And there's just band of women behind us, okay? One of them has a megaphone that doesn't fucking, it just makes him sound like Stephen Hawking, right? So it's just some lady. Are you fucking? It's like a $9 megaphone. It's like, are you fucking kidding me? And she's just yelling, they're all yelling at the raft dude, you know? Yeah, yelling at rafts of kids games is fucking nice. Cause that guy's a fucking loser. Oh yeah, it's so mean. That guy must have control in the community though.

Starting point is 01:34:59 Yeah, he's like, all right, I got to raft this fucking seventh grade football game today. And then there's some parent like you fucking piece of shit. Yeah, you fucking I was a whole you fucking dumbass. Yeah, that was a whole get your ass out your ass. Somebody all yelling at you to the parking lot beat your fucking ass. You think I said to like run to their cards after middle school football game for $12 an hour the guy is fucking almost die in his community just cuz he fucking was to work the weekend sprint and don't fucking outfit you got to take your hat off

Starting point is 01:35:37 yeah this is right here really great got drunk all these dudes on. He's doing such a shit thing. He unbelievable dude. That is nice though, getting fucking wrecked and going and coaching a game. Yeah. I'm gonna game shit face. Have you done it?

Starting point is 01:35:57 No, I haven't. I have not. He seemed like he would be able to do it. Our coach, our coach little, uh, Midget football. Did you really? Yeah. It was really, really a little.

Starting point is 01:36:07 Oh, you've got a top one. We call it midget. Yeah. It's great. We call it a midget league. Yeah. Some people used to call it that and some people still do call it that. I'm only still do.

Starting point is 01:36:14 Is there a, is there an actual little person football league or not? It's got to be. Let's bring that up. They're doing all types of stuff. Well, you know, it always gets me every year. Is that video of the blind guy playing football. That comes up. I'm fine, child, playing football.

Starting point is 01:36:28 It's so funny. It's funny because it's, you know what I mean? It's not fun. I'm not laughing at, though. No, it's not funny because the guy's blind. It's funny because... It just goes exactly how you think it's gonna go. Yeah, and the reporter pretends, this is what's funny about it, is the reporter's what makes going to go. Yeah. And the reporter pretend, this is what's

Starting point is 01:36:45 funny about it, is the reporters, what makes it fucking ridiculous. Yeah. Cause they're like, Hey, this makes perfect normal sense and safety for this guy. And then they watch the play and pretend like it's fucking not insane. Little people versus giant people. This is soccer. I don't see any American football. The giants. The giant. That's just a regular fat guy. I can be one of the giants.

Starting point is 01:37:11 God damn it. A little fewer way better at soccer. One three looks good. Put his ass down. Oh, he kicked me motherfucker. Little kids, the little guys are going to fuck these dudes up. That's a foul. That's yellow. Yeah. Big, big,

Starting point is 01:37:27 Sherbert. Big dudes always have new names like Sherbert. Look at that. Oh, she's pissed, huh? It's a good wall though. We're gonna block that free kick. The fact I will. Yeah, it's unfair. Yeah, yes Yeah, can we bring it up the news or just play the news story? Because it's just Dilling Collier and God bless them. We should call them actually. Let's get them on a solo episode That him and Chase Matthews the guy that uh Shit in the wig war what that guy did?

Starting point is 01:38:04 They got it vomited on the girl on the baby. Don't get them together. You mean separate episodes. Separate episodes. Talk about, I just want to talk to him. I want to see what this guy think about it. He's got to think it's fucking insane. Dylan play because he's doing all of this blind.

Starting point is 01:38:20 You know, I can't see and a lot of people think that I've got a blind person can't play football. That's true. This courageous youngster has proven those people wrong. Bro, imagine though, this is wild though. If he is blind, then he could play a total different defense. You can't even expect because you expect a normal defense out of you know, you expect certain lanes and this shit like that. That guy might leave the field. Yeah. I'm not where he's going.

Starting point is 01:38:56 That fucking game is longer. But if he hits you, that game's longer than a hundred yards. He is going to. There is something that is true about this is if he does hit you, he is gonna run right through you. Which is how you're supposed to like, if you wanna fucking drill someone, get point. Run right through him.

Starting point is 01:39:10 That's a great idea. You're gonna hit a really fucking heart. You couldn't penalize him for some of those like poaching or whatever they get, those penalties, you know? Yeah. Yeah, I would love to see what this guy's up to and how, what it was like for him, dude, how brave to run when you're blind, like, you know,

Starting point is 01:39:25 just run as fast as you can when you're fucking blind. Yeah. Fuck, it's brave shit, dude. That's the kind of shit we need in this country. Meanwhile, we have a bunch of fucking mathematics. Arm and themselves out of a T-moble, because we told them to. You told them I didn't you told him

Starting point is 01:39:46 Why did you say that you're on the horse? I'm never gonna get on horse. Yeah, you are buddy Yeah, any other news that you think we covered everything Shane lives in Austin now. Yeah We had one other video we were watching like this Oh, yeah, and this is racial stuff. Let's go Um, we had one other video we were watching like this. Oh yeah. And this is racial stuff that's going, this is, let's, let's, let's, let's, let's start it up. Well, so this is, so one of the problems that's happening in society is people can't afford to ubers anymore.

Starting point is 01:40:22 And so here, this is, this happen, I think in, this looks like new Hampshire. The dumps on my car. He's just hitting a ride. It's right in front of my car. Get off! Oh no. There's a white guy hanging. He's on the front of a black-ass car.

Starting point is 01:40:46 What the black-ass driving around? Sorry, fucking Pittsburgh. He's still on my car! Get the fuck off my car! Oh, don't go sideways bro. Oh. Oh, good. Dude, it's unbelievable. The guy didn't just stop and say, hey, see your citizen who is 60 years older than me, who maybe having an episode is so funny. Hey, buddy, what did you fucking get off my

Starting point is 01:41:16 car? Instead, the guys fucking listen to the human eyes are young doll. And he's just like, hey, this is crazy. The Trump hat's so good on it. This is crazy. The Trump hat's so nice. This guy's on my core. Like, he's a fucking, like, it's a butterfly or something. That is how I treat bugs on my core. I'm like, I'll slow down, see if he gets off.

Starting point is 01:41:39 You guys have got to see this. It's a fucking bug on a card. It's a fucking, this guy is 72 years old. He's holding on to the front of this guy's car. And we don't know why. This is that Biden shit man that people are talking about. And this is people on meds, this is people not having any hope probably. I mean you run out of hope.

Starting point is 01:42:05 You're going to have to get on someone's car. That's what I'm saying. That's a step two. Can you look around? You guys, there's no hope. Well, yeah, and Uber's at a certain point, it's just all, it's just going to be a bunch of lords in their castles. The rest of us will be all Ubering each other.

Starting point is 01:42:21 They'll be the only job. But everybody's Ubering, so nobody is a passenger. Nobody's breaking it. We're all just breaking it on this. So you're literally going to have people holding each other at gun point to be their passenger. Oh, man, dude. Imagine if that was your relative, that you just saw that video. You're like, man, he had a fucking manic episode. He jumped on a dude's car

Starting point is 01:42:49 Went for his spin. He just went around the block God wants us to watch it one more time. Yeah, it's great. I love seeing his face I wish I had a view of his feet. He said, get off. But he didn't get into. He was getting off. I always just say get off my car at 20 miles an hour. He goes for the exit. He tried to take the orthodox

Starting point is 01:43:30 fucking tunnel off to the side. But what in fucking. Oh man. See that guy roll in the street. Hey, let's find who that is and let's also get him on the next solo. Those three guys don't want to know. Dillion Collier, the guy Jordan Matthews, Chase Matthews I think was his name. Pukemay? Yep, the guy that vomited in the baby girl. And you know that guy was hoping nobody brought that up. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:44:00 Oh man. There's 21 ship face at a baseball game. He's never living that down. Puget on a fucking little kid. Yeah, I wonder what the kids doing now too. It'd be crazy to see if that influence Tim somehow, you know, if he works with Belémia or something. Or, you know, to prevent anybody from going to stop a geol canter maybe.

Starting point is 01:44:20 Yeah. What else we got? Zach anything else? How long have we been in here a while? Not two hours. Oh, wow, really.? How long have we been in here a while? About two hours. Oh, wow, really? Oh, shit. Okay.

Starting point is 01:44:27 That's good. Matt and Shane's secret podcast. Yes. With Matt McCosker, Shane Gillis. Matt's got to come on next time with you, man. Yeah, he's got it. So much fun in you guys' show. You would do it without me, just Matt.

Starting point is 01:44:40 Yeah? You guys would get along very well. Okay. Yeah. All right. Got similar vibes. Well, I just want to make sure we have our meeting of the generals that are going to be working. So, because you won't be good. Well, Fox, a very general name. Yes. Very. But Cuskers last stand. He's going to get bombs are going to turn on.

Starting point is 01:45:02 But Cusker's last stand he's gonna get the bombs are gonna turn on him. It's not fucking but still dude. But Cusker's last stand and he fucking will never forget when he fucking commandeered those three T-mobile out of the middle of the night. Yeah, little best by.

Starting point is 01:45:18 Yeah, little best by. Yeah, he, uh, this has been tried before though. Yeah. Not necessarily, uh, bombs, but just saying like, they're downtrout and they're going to rise up if I let, uh, uh, uh, John Brown did that. Did he really? Yeah, that's how he sparked the Civil War in America. He's so, he was like, I'm going to start it.

Starting point is 01:45:39 He thought rightfully so that slavery was, uh, he was very religious and he was like, this is the graveston. And he was like, he was like, he was like, if I go take the armory at Harper's Ferry, all the slaves from all the area are gonna join us. Wow. And not many of them did. Really?

Starting point is 01:45:56 Almost none. So they let him down or they were afraid? I don't know, he was a little nuts. So they were probably like, that's not the guy to do it. And he's a white guy or black guy? He was a honky, but his lesson was brown. Yes So they give him some of that credit He gets a lot of credit in the black community. That's a great. Yeah, I mean he fucking use the man He starts who really inspired so we actually made a physical motion to say hey, let's do it

Starting point is 01:46:21 We gotta get rid of slavery right wow and they hung him You got fucking Mary the elephant treatment. Oh to say, hey, let's do this. We gotta get rid of slavery. Right, wow. And they hung him. You got fucking Mary the Elf and Treatment. Oh, that's heartbreaking. Where's he buried at? He's from Kansas or some, yeah. Wow, so he really was trying to, that was just out in Kansas. And who hung him the white?

Starting point is 01:46:41 Yeah, the honky's got him. God. He's buried in the Mountains in New York. How do you pronounce this? Adironda. Yeah, there we go. Okay. He was a beast. He was getting after it though before he did that. He was he was killing all the Southern Sympathasers. Yeah, in Kansas. He was him and his sons sympathizers. Slybonus sympathizers. Yeah, and Kansas. He was him and his sons were macheteering people.

Starting point is 01:47:08 Oh, yeah. Wow. Pretty good guy though. I'd be interesting. If we could do a Ouija board or something to talk with some of those guys, you know. Yeah. Be pretty cool, but I don't know who does that kind of work.

Starting point is 01:47:22 Say, answer or whatever. That would be a good episode. With a say answer. Get a fucking would be a good episode with a saying. It's a fucking medium in here. Get like somebody that's like, I'm going to contact the dead. You think so? I think that'd be a great episode. You got to pick out some cool, they can't be like, oh, this is some, hey, we just got

Starting point is 01:47:36 to call from Richard outside of Toledo. People calling it a radio show. Hi, mom, the air. Fuck. Now I'm out of swear. Hi, my name is Aaron. Fuck. Not a swear. That's a real hilarious dude. He just had an open sales line. You know what I'm saying?

Starting point is 01:47:52 Yeah, this is a rubber drum. Long time listen to it, I've been listening to you guys for eternity. It's all right. Welcome to town, man. Are you touring this year? What else is going on just so people know? Yeah, I'm touring. Okay. Yeah, I don't, man. Are you, are you touring the show? What else is going on just so people know?

Starting point is 01:48:05 Yeah, I'm touring. Okay. Yeah. I'm, I don't know when this comes out, but I'm going to announce, uh, I'm doing Netflix. Is a joke. I'm doing the Greek theater and the key of form. You know, you're doing the form too. Doing the form in LA.

Starting point is 01:48:18 So that 11,000 seats, hopefully that sells some tickets. Oh my gosh. I think Louie said that's his favorite place to go do a show. Really? Yeah. I think I'm like, maybe try that this year. That's so exciting, dude. Yeah. Wow. So that'd be exciting. I'll be nervous. That'd be your biggest show ever. That'll be the biggest. Yeah. That's exciting. Have you done any outdoor festival shows? I did a bunch with Crusher. Oh, yeah. They were fun. Some of those looked amazing. Like some of those,

Starting point is 01:48:44 some of those were really amazing. Do you like doing that? Or when we did one in Edmonton, it was tough. It was fun. It's just different. Yeah. I don't know. I've only ever done it opening for Bert. So I don't know how it would do like a long set might be hard. I have no idea. Did you feel like it was fine? Like just how you did it? I was doing like 15, 20 minutes. So I was like, all right, let's just clock in, get this done. Sometimes it was good. Sometimes I felt like I sucked, because you can't tell, because it was like a minor baseball field, you know,

Starting point is 01:49:12 you know, the laughs, yeah. And it was, the sun was up a lot of the time. So you could see everyone not, you know, you could see everyone getting up, yeah, drinks. Yeah. Yeah, someplace you do it, and some people don't even know. I remember I taped us A comedy special in New Orleans and people had never some people had never seen live comedy didn't even know

Starting point is 01:49:30 People were yelling people thought I was like a sporting event. We're yelling defense Some lady was at the top just beating on the back wall just going deep Deep You're getting fired up. It was just fucking crazy. Like what? It's going on here. Yeah, you get, yeah. Big crowd like that, they can start getting wild. Yeah. What's been one of the toughest things

Starting point is 01:49:52 about getting more popular? You've just had such a crazy, I mean, you, you did it somehow, you made it. I mean, I know how, but it's just like, are you, you've just gotten, you've, that popular. Yeah. Yeah, a lot of it's on TikTok and shit.

Starting point is 01:50:06 I don't even have a TikTok. You don't like clips, yeah. I don't personally, I don't like them. I don't care if other people do them, but it's funny, because like young people will see me and be like, you're the TikTok guy. Yeah. I'm like, damn, I gotta get on TikTok.

Starting point is 01:50:20 I gotta see what's going on. That was a big thing, it was just clips. What, the hardest part about it? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, is there something that on. That was a big thing was just clips. What the hardest part about it? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, there's something that's been interesting about it. I mean, it's just an interesting thing that happens in somebody's life when they get more pot. You know, it's like just interest. Yeah, you've done it. It's just weird.

Starting point is 01:50:34 I don't know how to. Yeah, maybe it's just weird. Yeah, I was just curious. Feel surreal. I don't know. There's nothing you thought about or noticed about it or anything that was to talk about or anything. I just got to take pictures a lot. Yeah. Which that's not always great.

Starting point is 01:50:48 And you're tall. You can't. I. Yeah. I'm. Yeah. I don't like the way I look a lot of the time. So I have to take and I have like a sometimes a very embarrassing smile.

Starting point is 01:50:57 Yeah. So many pictures with my arms up like. There's so many pictures. There's so many pictures of me. Well, nice to meet you guys. Thanks. Don't look them up. I'm gonna bring them up. Oh, there's one with you and Trump. Dude, that's sick. You were there. You were there. Yeah. Yeah. We talked about that last time. Oh, yeah. You I don't think I was sitting. I was sitting further away from you guys though. Yeah, you were you

Starting point is 01:51:20 You went to like the first one. Trump ever came to I think that was fun. Yeah, that was fun Yeah, you were directly behind that. I know exactly where you were poor you Max Krasby's arm. Is it really got the chain right there? Yeah, wow Max Krasby's a cool guy. Yeah, I think that was him. Yeah, and his brother too. I don't know what his brother. What's his brother's name miles miles I'm at miles too one time Wonder if it's cool if your brothers in the end if I bet that's awesome. It's gotta be awesome because you don't have to do it Yeah, yeah, you get to do fucking my homes brother

Starting point is 01:51:54 You do fucking tic-tocks everyone's like shut the fuck up. Yeah, you just get to do tic-tocks and fucking me guys It's bother everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah You just get to do tic-tocks and just buy sweaters and shit and your brother's fucking out there killing it. That's gotta be nice That's awesome. Yeah, watch it like if your brother was Patrick my arms. It's cool to watch. Oh be so So watch your brother be the best player in the world Dude, you'd have to be like how the fuck out of this? If you knew your brother and you're like, yeah, are you fucking I remember I caught you jacking off like a hundred times Yeah, I am the same.

Starting point is 01:52:25 Well, fucking and then I love look passing. Yeah, and then I left you alone for two seconds and came back in the room. Okay. What are you doing? Like a good parents should, dude. All right, man, we'll see you guys in either Buffalo

Starting point is 01:52:39 or in Austin outside of the comedy partnership if shit hits the fence. Cause you have to recognize that some point people will think in their head. I've thought about this. Where do we all go when shit when it gets Because all it takes is that fucking one that one night, you know, yeah, I'm gonna try to get hold of Rogan That's the guy right I agree and I spoke with him about this one time and he I think it decided he will be off shore in a boat looking back at America I think so and that's what a lot of people be doing. Be vigilant. The second chip pops off.

Starting point is 01:53:08 I got to get it over there. Because a lot of people are going to rush. It's going to be like, no, it's dark. Oh, yeah. People are going to be like, save us. Yeah. There's going to be two of like every type of turkonomic. Yeah.

Starting point is 01:53:19 Me and Tim Dylan walking hand in hand. It's just, all right, two fat whites. You guys are in. Yeah. Me and Teg Nataro. Yeah. And two fat whites. You guys are in. Me and Tegna Taro. And big US guys, you guys are in. I'd be sick, dude. Two people with my, like, ah, there was little things. Jeff Donnell man.

Starting point is 01:53:41 To imagine being the other guy that's not Jeff Donnell. People are like, how are you Jeff? I was doing this before him. That motherfucker. Um, Shane Gillisman congrats, dude. Congrats on just being funny and for, um, and I'm sorry you didn't win the Golden Globe and you should have I think. Oh, thanks. I, uh, yeah. I thought you at least should have been up for it. Thanks. I appreciate that. Um, and, um And yeah, you guys can find them on tour. Dude, the fucking form you're doing the form and the Greek?

Starting point is 01:54:11 Yeah, in the same week. Why, you're getting it? Hopefully I'm not a Greek. I'm not, it's my agent. Your agent? Oh yeah. Yeah, we did the Greek, they're like, let's see, you can do the form.

Starting point is 01:54:21 Yeah. They're like, it's gonna sell. I was like, oh man. You sure it's gonna sell? Cause I'll do it. The same week is the Greek. Yeah. Fuck, it's gonna sell. I was like, oh man, you sure it's gonna sell. It's the same week as the Greek. Yeah, fuck, that's awesome. I've never done that, Lego. So that's good.

Starting point is 01:54:30 That helps. Yeah, that's awesome. Well, you'll definitely do it, man. I know. Is it fucking air conditioning? Yeah. Now that the podcast is wrapping up, it's bringing back down to 75.

Starting point is 01:54:41 Stank Shane for coming in, man. I appreciate it, man. Thank you. Yep, talk to you later brother. Now I'm just floating on the breeze, and I feel I'm falling like these leaves I must be cornerstone. Oh, but when I reach that ground, I'll share this piece of mind I found I can't feed it. In my bones, I can't see it In my bones But it's gonna take

This Past Weekend - E478 Shane Gillis

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