This Past Weekend - First Time for Everything | This Past Weekend #205

Episode Date: June 10, 2019

Subscribe to the show on Apple Podcasts http://bit.ly/ThisPastWeekend_ Theo takes voicemails about listeners first crotch touches, then is joined by Nick for the news, and closes the show with a voicemail about feeling guilty for spending instead of saving. Check out Producer Nick’s podcast: Another Bachelor Podcast http://bit.ly/TPW_AnotherBachelorPodcast Covering Bachelor, Bachelorette, and Bachelor in Paradise This episode brought to you by… Blue Chew Visit https://bluechew.com and enter promo code THEO to receive your first order free plus only $5 shipping Chris Distefano Listen wherever podcasts are available Hair Club Visit https://HairClub.com/THEO for a free hair analysis and free hair care kit Omaha Steaks Visit https://OmahaSteaks.com and type PAST into the search bar to receive $235 worth of meat for only $59.99 Hit the Hotline [phone] Music “Every Night” by Jameson Flood https://soundcloud.com/jameson-flood Find Theo Website: https://theovon.com Instagram: https://instagram.com/theovon Facebook: https://facebook.com/theovon Facebook Group: https://facebook.com/groups/thispastweekend Twitter: https://twitter.com/theovon YouTube: https://youtube.com/theovon Clips Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCiEKV_MOhwZ7OEcgFyLKilw Producer Nick https://instagram.com/realnickdavis Gunt Squad www.patreon.com/theovon Name Aaron Jones Aaron Rasche Aaron Wayne Anselmi Adam White Alaskan Rock Vodka Alex Hitchins Alex Person Alex Petralia Alexa harvey Andrea Gagliani Andrew Valish Angelo Raygun Anthony Holcombe Anthony Schultz Arielle Nicole Ashley Konicki Audrey Hodge Ayako Akiyama Bad Boi Benny Ben Deignan Ben in thar.. Benjamin Herron Benjamin Streit Bobby Hogan Brad Moody Brandon Hoffman Brandon Kirkman Carla Huffman Casey Roberts Charles Herbst Christian Coyne Christina Peters Christopher Stath Cody Cummings Cody Kenyon Cody Marsh Crystal Dakota Montano Dan Draper Dan Perdue Daniel Chase Danielle Fitzgerald Danny Crook Danny Gill David Christopher David Smith Diana Morton Dionne Enoch Donald blackwell Doug C Drew Munoz Dusty Baker Faye Dvorchak Felicity Black Ginger Levesque Grant Stonex Greg Salazar Gunt Squad Gary J Garcia J.P. Jacob Rice Jamaica Taylor James Briscoe James Hunter Jameson Flood Jason Price Jeffrey Lusero Jenna Sunde Jeremy Johnson Jeremy Siddens Jeremy Weiner Jim Floyd Joaquin Rodriguez Joe Dunn Joel Henson Joey Piemonte John Kutch Johnathan Jensen Jon Blowers Jon Ross Jordan R Josh Cowger Josh Nemeyer Justin Doerr Justin L justin marcoux Kaitlin Mak Kennedy Kenton call Kevin Best Kirk Cahill kristen rogers Kyle Baker Lacey Ann Laszlo Csekey Lauren Williams Lawrence Abinosa Leighton Fields Luke Bennett Madeline Garland Mandy Picke'l Marisa Bruno Matt Kaman Meaghan Lewis Meghan LaCasse Mike Mikocic Mike Nucci Mike Poe Mona McCune Nick Butcher Nick Roma Nick Rosing Nikolas Koob Noah Bissell OK Passenger Shaming PF24 Gang Gang Qie Jenkins Rachel Warburton Randal Ranger Rick Robert Mitchell Robyn Tatu Rohail Ryan Hawkins Ryan Walsh Sarah Anderson Scoot B. Scott Wilson Sean Scott Season Vaughan Secka Kauz Shane Pacheco Shannon potts Shona MacArthur Suzanne O'Reilly Theo Wren Thomas Adair Tim Greener Timothy Eyerman Todd Ekkebus Tom Cook Tom Kostya Tommy Frederick Travis Simpson Tugzy Mills Tyler Harrington (TJ) Victor Montano Victor S Johnson II Vince Gonsalves William Reid Peters Yvonne Zeke HarrisSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Man I'm trying to watch this game of thrones and um and man these guys They just I mean they cannot get along really or the women Or the women so I Just don't even know what to think anymore. I mean, it's just swords and Pedophilia and they don't even and what about all the candles that are lit. Do you even notice that? Every said every bet they got two thousand

They got nine candles everywhere Somebody's getting murdered and they got three candles behind them Who's putting them out and you never see anybody? You know doing like a little bit of fire safety or something protocol whatever I gotta I gotta quit worrying about some of this stuff Every night I feel like a fake Every night you sleep Every night I'll be still you things that you know, but you still I

Every night I lie awake. I feel like a fake I put on a show That is Jameson flood Like the water I don't know if you ever had too much to drink and And that's similar to a flood, but it's different Good to be here With you guys, thank you for joining me and thank you for allowing me to be here with you What's up?

I'm here. You're here You sometimes I feel like this I like I'm just leaving you a voicemail and it's just like a really long one Like I'm the stat chatty VM dropper It is it is right now it is Monday, June 10 the 10 of June So if you see somebody tomorrow and they say well, what date is it you say well, it's the 10 of June It's the 10 of June and we are coming up. I believe on the summer solstice and

That's when summer really really starts to heat things up and In the planets like all agree that it's summer. They kind of line up in the Sun and the moon and it's Because there's always a couple, you know, they always got a planet or two, you know Pluto You know a couple of Jupiter's moons or whatever that are always like, ah, you know, it's not summer It's not really summer. It's you know, we're doing this Couple holdouts, but when that solstice lines up when that summer solstice June 22nd That's the equinox when it lines up. That's when his summer says that's the grilling That's the time that some really old fucking grill you meet

That's when that fire comes straight out of the Sun and just It'll get you it will get you if you're trying to get rid of a spouse or something. That is a good time to To you know to leave them in the yard So but let's don't think about that Gonna let you know that today's episode is brought to you by blue chew And a lot of people think blue chew when I was young. It was a chewing tobacco. It was a blueberry chewing tobacco And so, you know, no, you know chewing tobacco and blueberries. Nothing will really give you I Mean that'll make your stomach just howl right out of your buttocks

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the I'll be in the middle of a mouthful of potatoes, you know, we're patots and I shut down Like somebody pressed the power button on me while I was patotting and I will just Shut down Jet lag will bring a man. I mean, it'll make your ankles roll right out of your feet It'll just it's a real thing And I think it's something we can start to find a way to use on our enemies a little bit of jet lag But what do I know? Oh, we got a you know, I'm happy to be here with you. What's going on with me?

What's going on man? I honestly do to hurt my freaking back. I Was putting a shirt on And he wasn't even a strong shirt or a thick shirt. I Was putting on a mediocre You know a mediocre shirt and I came out my head came out the neck hole and It came out like at an angle and I hurt my back and my neck So I've been just kind of real limited edition all week. I've been having to lay ice Lay on ice in my bed. I'll get me a couple trays of ice

And I get my mom. I got a beach towel and a beach towel Somebody really that's marketing because a towel you could do anything with a towel Towel for this towel for that You good you got out the shower towel up. You you know, you spilled some wine get that towel You know you uh You're in the desert towel up put a towel around your scalp, you know, they got it all Then somebody said oh, we need a specific towel for the beach. We need a beach towel And that's marketing right there

It's still a towel. There's nothing different about it Somebody put the word beach in front of it and now everybody's fucking spending an extra $13.99 and I had that beach towel. I put it on my bed. I put a bunch of ice cubes I put three trays of cubes on it and then I'll lay on that ice And be that little ice daddy that ice baby And man, it's cold at first, but then the pain goes away and you can't feel anything And damn you get so cold sometimes and then it disappears and then you don't even know who you are man And I even have to put my legs up in the air looks like I'm a damn newborn

Like I'm a newborn and I'm trying to get my, you know, my bum powdered by mom I'm trying to get my bum powdered by mom and And so I do that and um, I just been icing and heating my back all week So it's been just out of commission. It's crazy man. Everything's going good in there. Bam son get on your knees boy and The pain too. I don't you know, I don't have anything to subside the pain So I'm just praying this shit goes away and they don't have a chapter in the Bible really about you know pain remedy The Bible doesn't have a you know a couple hundred milligrams of ibuprofen hidden in it

So I was going through all of these Ramadan everything. I'm celebrating anything this week that will help alleviate the pain I'm asking all the gods for help We had a lot of calls that came in about you know, I Like to think about when I was young and just the joy And remember when you were young man, and you you know, you tried something new for the first time Maybe you saw, you know, you saw all remember the first time you saw a peach You're like damn. That's an orange. That's kind of like a Is that like a senior citizen orange or something?

Is that like a orange that maybe been in a halfway house? or maybe a orange that You know, it's kind of like one of those hairless cats, but like it's like a hair. It's like a Like it's like the hairless cat of the orange family and somebody's like no motherfucker. That's a peach man There's a peach boy So, you know, you get I love being young everything was a new experience And Which we get older we get used to the experiences and they start to run together and that is that things to lose their novelty

And that's what I'm you know And I try not to get too caught up in the fact of things losing their novelty So I'm trying to just I'm trying to stay in the novelty of life because there is a lot of beautiful stuff going on and And one of the novelties that we all go through in time Is when somebody touched our you know weener of you know Up in the you know if a lady somebody touched you down in that trim trim, you know in the down in the vegetines, bro down in them you know down in them

Down in that, you know in that freaking little that You know down in that sugar wallet Down in the old old, you know down in the old oyster the old oyster Coin purse you feel me Well Everybody has a story about that in a different moment in time and we had a beautiful call about a year ago Lady first time a man ever touched her vagina was in a

Abandoned refrigerator box out in the garage and she had a You know, she had a she had a beautiful story about that and And we all have a special first time and a lot of you guys know first time somebody, you know a young lady over there off of Highway 22 kind of masturbated me out into the water Over there off of the you know in one of the tributaries of the chafuncta river This lady jay owed me out there into the water and that you could see the fish come up and get Get the seed that had come out of my body and that was nature going full circle. You Know, I mean that is just damn nature like somebody just put a whole bunch of nature in a blender and just made a damn

Just a smoothie just a soul smoothie and just pour that bitch right down into your freaking chakras and And everybody has that moment so a lot of you guys hit the hotline nine eight five six six four nine five zero three and And thank you for for hitting the hotline and and you just called in and shared some of your moments Oh, I want to hear some of those. I haven't heard any of them and I'm grateful to you for sharing the pieces of your life Because we all remember that time That first time because look when you're young you've been touching your own crotch You know, I remember we had a guy in our area this boy

This kid his name was Tyson, right they called him fat Tyson and nobody his dad called him that so and You know, he would do you know, everybody would do he would everybody when you got to know your body when you find your body had different erogenous zones In erogenous zone is something you massage yourself or touch your nipples. Do remember when your nipples got hard remember that? Bro, I thought I didn't know what was going on I thought I got like had fallen down and got an acorn stuck like in my tit on Each one double corn, you know So yeah, just different times, but I remember fat Tyson told us one time that he had

He had hidden like a small one of those toothbrushes you get into his Uh, and it was honest and his you know anus or whatever, you know into that that be whole boy And this I know this is getting kind of dirty, but I'm just I'm just letting you know that we all have experiences with our body And there's nothing wrong with that There's nothing wrong with if you're young Putting something in your buttocks There's nothing crazy about that I mean when you first are born you learn about your mouth. That's a natural hole. You know, so you put snacks in there

Put a sugar treat in your mouth put a little cornbread You know put a broccoli or something in your mouth and that's natural Then you start learning about other, you know, you sneak in a mom's room one day and you see dad in there doing The ear cleaner Q tipping And so you get one and you do that and that's crazy. You can't even imagine like if it's so close to my brain This is scary and you pull it out. It's a little bit of brown on there. You're like, Jesus my brain has brown Wax in it. I'm going to hell. You know you get caught up And then another you know, then you're wean, you know, you have a gene or whatever you get used to a new thing your bellybutt

I remember one of my favorite things. I would lay on the floor at night and put a couple of chocolate um I would put a couple of chocolate, uh Chocolate chips Because tow house used to have these sack of chocolate chips when mom was going to make chocolate chip cookies She got a bag of chocolate chips And she would have to hide them boy because if I found that sack of chocos was to the dome

And so I'd take a cup I usually take three and I'd put them into my belly button and lay on my back by the television Watching in the heat of the night, which was a beautiful television show and And uh And they would get heated up by my body heat And that's when that went and then my my belly button would fill with a little bit of chocolate sauce or chocolate

You know kind of a mousse. I guess almost a nice fancy, you know a mousse they call it And then I would dip my finger in there on a commercial break and get me a little hit of chocolate Put that thing in my mouth and just Really just eating chocolate right out of my own My own belly button Which is unique because you you know years earlier. I've been inside of my mother. She had fed me through that tube And here I am filling that hole, you know that that same space where my mother had once nourished me here I am melting chocolate chips tow house morsels

And just morseling myself up just dipping my finger into that melted morsel And just bringing it straight up into my face, you know feeding myself now years later And that's just full circle. It's the same as It's not the same but it's very similar to masturbating into a stream and watching the fish come And then maybe two years later. You're at a restaurant down the street and you have a little bit of uh You know some tilapia or some barramundi or you have a cut of uh of uh

White fish or butter fish first of all Where where are they getting new fish from you notice this on menus? Every like maybe two years they put a new it's like oh they got the mahi mahi. Where has that been? Dude go read Moby Dick. See how many mahi mahi's they got in that sucker zilchi zilchi, bro Go, you know now they got the barramundi. I'm somewhere the other day and the guy's like, oh we got We got line caught barramundi Dude, I don't give a fuck how you convince that guy, you know how you convince that thing to swim over here

I don't care if you pour nicotine in the water for a couple years and slowly got him addicted I don't you know what out what oh We got you know We got uh We got um, you know, we got successfully convinced salmon Like you just convinced him to jump into the net It's just like what the fuck are we doing dude and barramundi. I never heard of that Give me a real fish people have heard of catfish

uh Swedish fish that's a candy, but everybody's heard of it. Um trout Um tuna fish I'm just sick of some of this fake fish shit every oh, we got butter fish. We got white fish. What the what are you talking about? Where where'd you get it? You got an email from the lord and they said aw they we were releasing, you know two new types of fish like it's a new shoe You we got limited edition over here on these swimmers get out of here

Anyway, I'm going nuts man. I'm actually starving as well right now Um Anyway, we got some crotch stories, let's get into a couple of those and thank you guys for uh for calling um, I also right right before we get into I want to say this too if you hit uh You know, we have a couple shows coming up vancouver This week vancouver seattle portland boise um, and we always do things for single moms out there

And uh, we have some tickets that we're going to give away for each of those cities uh to single dads. It's father's day coming up So it would be great. Uh, if you guys would email producer p-r-o-d-u-c-e-r at the ovan t-h-e-o-v-o-n We want to do something special for some single fathers out there. We've got uh And just email and nominate a single father And this has to be a father of decent age. I don't don't bring me some 79 year old 200 year old guy

Who he you know, he has to drink through a sack or whatever. He's got a collage. I don't want that guy I want a dad who's got a young child who has a child who's in school or you know what i'm saying? I want a single dad All right, and I know that's just my definition of it, but that's what I would like So we want to do something special for those men out there Uh, who because it's tough for those guys too So you want to do special for something special for some single dads? And that's what we're going to do and we want to thank our patreon supporters for helping us with that

Set aside some tickets So just email the ovan at producer.com if you recommend someone in those cities And put the information and we will uh, we're gonna we're gonna give out some uh, some sets of tickets for those different cities boise Portland, seattle and vancouver and uh, thank you guys so much for your support Let's take this call right here. Here we go. Hi Phil. This is sarah from chicago Hey, sarah from chicago. Nice to see you over there and chicago

An amazing city in the u.s You know a good city where I think you get a little bit of everything Uh, and I met some beautiful ladies over there in chicago and over the years I saved them on my phone I would be like, oh chicago janet you know chicago uh Ray, you know ray lean or uh, ray nail And then over the years, but then you come back to town over the years and you then you hit them up and you're like

I don't even remember Now this lady, you know, she's 45 or 47 and she's got a couple kids or husbands texting you back like who the fuck What's going on? So you got to be careful who you Whose number you save in that great city? Let's hear more This morning on my way to work I was laughing at the hotline question because My first sexual experience as a 15 year old was with some with some crotch rubbing And praise god, babe. Praise god

And uh, let's hear you just say that part again about the crotch rubbing Um, because it's just make sure everybody heard it. I can't tell some with some crotch rubbing and My boyfriend and I who's now my husband We're in the back of my dad's car on our way home from great america. Oh Yeah, and so it begins immediately I'm going back to that place in my heart in my right now. I want to go put on like a um

I want to put on a big johnson shirt. They had this special series of shirts Uh, I want to go put, you know, I want to I want to put on some old music some boys to men or some, um Some kind of shit and really make it pop. So you and your oh, yeah, you're in the back of a parent's car. Okay, let's go My dad's car on our way home from great america Great america is in gurney and he lives all the way in chicago. It's a good two-hour drive Oh, yeah Turn up the music dad pretty far

And I remember I just kind of started touching his crotch. I just don't really know why Oh, I know why because the lord wants you to that's why I mean, I look If you put my hand somewhere and you put a crotch somewhere else and you turn off the lights When you turn that light back on I swear to god boy, my hand will be over there So, let's hear more. Um, I'm the oldest of two brothers. So I just didn't really have any siblings to kind of help me understand What sex was what was going to have been none of that So he started reacting as

Medu to a woman touching his crotch and he had a He had a heart on for about two hours all the way from great america All the way home and my husband and I we still laugh about it. Uh, I remember being so shocked I really understanding what the hell was going on If he was gonna be okay Oh, yeah, and that's beautiful and you know, that's love when you get erect and somebody asks you if you're doing okay I mean, that's american love right there Usually you get erect and people a woman might laugh she might you know text to get a shot of it a snap show her friend

You know ronnie's got a little dick But it's beautiful When a woman, you know, you get erect you've been erect for a couple hours a girl knocks on the door. Hey Everything all right Let's hear more And now obviously it's just something we can look back at that. Um Gang gang a two hour wiener your man showed out with and that's beautiful And if you wanted to enter something in a national 4h competition, they're judging rabbits and they're judging

You know little chickadees and stuff you got to have two of the chickadees and this hair has got to be slicked back And they got to be healthy and their sugar level is good But you show me a man who can have an erection, you know a two hour wiener on a Riding back seat of a car While his while the dad is picking the music That's a show animal to me Thank you for that call and thank you for that story and just taking me back in time I remember hearing the first time I'd ever even heard about people having sex

Because we used to do some peeping time and when I grew up peeping time and was I mean that was cable And we used to do some good peeping time and boy I could see somebody eat and I watched somebody eat or do sex or whatever And all of it was kind of the same to me at all just I was so curious very much Like the American beauty remember that movie with Kevin Spacey and the other boy Ben Affleck or whatever But I loved that uh I loved watching people live their lives Through pain glass

Who doesn't And so what i'm saying now is this uh, I don't even know what i'm saying I don't even know what i'm talking about but uh, but thank you for that story. Thank you for taking me back I remember the first time when I was young hearing about sex And hearing that people that were having it and there was a boy And he was like a year older than us or two years and everybody said that he and this girl that had sex On some lawn chairs out by a pool over summer And suddenly everybody's like fuck man

I gotta have sex People are scared people are writing. I'm having sex on pieces of paper and just throw just you know It's pinning it to their shirt. Remember he's like, what are you talking about? You know People didn't even know like everybody was just consumed people are buying lawn chairs and you know laying them just putting them in their yard Other people are like sacrilegious. They're buying lawn chairs and like putting gas on them and burning them yelling racial slurs and stuff at them. It's just it got wild but But yeah, once that fire starts once you hear somebody I mean, I remember my buddy

My buddy You know, I remember the big thing was if you could touch a woman's crotch while y'all were in the back of the car When the mom was taking you home that was and still Let me say this That is still a golden move I don't care if you're 15 or if you are 60

If your wife or your significant other's mother is driving y'all somewhere and you in the back with your lady And you get to doing some touching or you know or the or your lady jerks you off while your dad is driving y'all somewhere That's still awesome, man That is still It's kind of like it's the it's the Mount Kilimanjaro of sexuality. It's just that rare It's just that thing it's something It's like so defiant of your parents and at the same time so like Adventurous because with all your dad has to do is turn back and look and you are

You're done dude One of my friends who will name Nate who will remain nameless. He was with his family Driving somewhere on a vacation. Okay. He puts the map up like this and masturbated behind the map I mean If you think your parents Don't know that you're masturbating behind a map in a small vehicle. This wasn't an suv. This is a car suv

maybe Jerking off behind a ran McNally Behind a small map In a car in a sedan Dirt that's dirt boy. That's dirt come on Come on boy. You got to tighten up on that on that level. All right. Let's take another story that came in here But man just some beautiful stories Beautiful stories, and we just wonder what a what a phenomenal time this is in people's lives

What a b.o.'s cow calling from North Carolina man calling in for the stc the stc challenge Yes, sir, and that's first time crotch touch and that's that f first time f t Ct crotch touch. Thank you for calling in cow from north kakalaka beautiful beautiful place over there and I know duke was losing in those uh in those to vanderbilt in those men's college world series, but kudos to them uh For for developing a great program over there. I know you and season in the college world series as well right now Onward, whatever you want to call it that first time crotch story first time I grab crotch

My parents and everyone else was going to church so And you know when you put the lord next to the loins And it's a real face off Oh Makes it more exciting doesn't it When everybody was in church we would sneak away

And go upstairs and we would swap spit with the girls, you know I was in middle school and I had my girlfriend at the time and I had seen My step sister and her boyfriend And did some I never seen you and he touched her crotch and he told me that's what you got to do. Oh, that's what you got to do boy That's what you gotta do Sorry, this is a very interesting to me to hear this research. Let's hear more They were older than me. So I went back to sunday school and I was excited, you know

Oh, yeah, suddenly it's saturday night Even though it's sunday school suddenly it is saturday night, my friend Yes, sir. Let's hear more I learned this new trick and we were making out And I touched your crotch So we get to school now monday. I'm excited, you know Oh, yeah, you're damn wane gratsky brother I mean, you're the damn wane gratsky

Of young leg. Let's hear it and she has sent me a note saying we were moving too fast And uh, she broke up with me and I didn't grab another crotch for a few years because I was kind of like a ptsd from it You know, I thought every time I I tried to make a move on anybody that were gonna break up with me. Wow Man, well, I appreciate you sharing that man. I couldn't understand that song Um, yeah, you know, look that's very look something happens and it alarms you and then you set off Let's hear more. But that's that's my first cross story. So Gang gang. I love y'all Gang gang brother and thank you for sharing your story with everybody and I mean that

You know, it's brave to put a little bit of yourself out there Whether it's a piece of your past or a piece of your present and I and I uh, I applaud all of all the callers that do You know I remember now, you know, I had erectile dysfunction for probably about 11 years and I still really You know, I'll probably still at all times. I got to have a little bit of gas station, you know, some of those Uh, gswp's is gas station wiener pills in my system At all times to even really get out of bed in the morning. I need two milligrams of something running through me and

and uh And it uh, uh, fuck. Sorry for the storm out. Jesus Man, yeah, well, so you I remember getting non erect And a lady and then I try to tell her like I was doing magic and I was like And my dick still wasn't doing erection my wiener was still being soft being, you know, real natural and She was disappointed and then I couldn't get over that for years

Because really I was just nervous. I should have just said, hey, I'm just uncomfortable right now And it probably would have been cool But at the time I was just young and I was nervous and there was broken glass And look, I can't I can't get erect near broken glass. Okay. Yeah, my bad, right? But I can't get erect Near broken glass and I still can't Or if there's a car accident or something doing I If I ain't I ain't I ain't getting erect near a car accident Okay. Yeah, my bad ladies

But yeah, those things really can give you a little bit of travesty. But thank you for sharing man That is the middle school's a little young to be learning that trick You know first time I saw some breasts. I remember I was uh Well, they used to have somebody had chiseled some tits into a nice birch That uh had been hit by lightning out near us in the woods And people used to go masturbate to that and You know, and that's just the lord working. But this was

Uh, I was at summer camp and they had this girl and she had red hair. I'd never seen red hair I've never seen it I'd seen, you know different colors of hair brown blonde, uh black White But I've never seen red hair and this girl had it man. She just looked so exotic to me And uh, I saw him another camp counselor looking at her breasts one time this dude joey I think his name was or you know, joey was actually a little more this dude joey was his name He was my camp counselor. John. He had a cousin a nephew named Jonas

Oh man I got for some reason I know them and my brain my brain is just skipping on their name um But they was out. I think he grew up out off of lee road. Anyway, but uh, they Joey I think was looking at the ladies breasts the camp counselor and I was a camper a camper And so I was like, oh, what's in there? You know, and he kept looking in her shirt and and they said, oh titties are And so I wanted to look in right so I looked in and I saw him dude, and I've never seen titties dude

Except for my moms, you know, and I'd only sneakily seen them And seen them sometimes when I didn't want to when my mom didn't think that we knew what titties were and she would almost And sometimes she would just get out the bath and we would see them but What happened was Uh, oh, I saw him and then I lied. I said I didn't see him And they were like, what? I was like, yeah, I didn't see him, you know So then they let me look again and I looked again in there and they were again still just milling around on this on this

On this camp counselor's chest, you know tits And then I said, oh, I remember I said I only saw one And that time they fucking said I was I was like a sicko And so then I kind of felt like something was wrong with me after that a little bit And I was afraid to see both breasts at once on a woman even though I'd lied about it. I was still Like I'll tell a lie about something and then Also suffered the repercussions of my lie

Isn't that crazy I'll be like, oh, yeah, I only saw one tittie even though I saw both They'll call me a sicko Then I feel bad About lying And then I'll also think for years to come When I see tits that if I look at both of them at the same time something bad's gonna happen to me So Jesus christ, let's hear another call that came in but sunday school slipping off from the lord

To do the devil's handy work As always the hotline is 985-664-9503 Here we go This is a first crotch experience call Thank you for the call brother onward. This is sean ohm from boulder city nevada sean oh from boulder city nevada

And i've never been over there, but um You know, it sounds beautiful rolls right off your tongue boulder city Um, I was about 13 between seventh and eighth grade Oh, it's prime touching area, dude That's prime time to touch or be touched You laying in bed at night. You can just hear other kids touching each other's crotches and it just burns you up Let's hear more brother onward

It was in springfield, missouri Oh, yeah That spring feel Go i'm at this chick at the swimming pool We go back to her place, you know, oh, yeah, and crotch always feels fresher when it's right out of the city pool if you ever notice that Or that summertime pool the or out of a bathing suit crotch always feels fresher when it's fresh like that I'll quit interrupting you onward. We go back to her place, you know, and to this point. I had only really seen late 70s early 80s pornography

Oh, yeah, sorry. I told you I wouldn't do that anymore. I won't let's hear the rest of your story. Sorry friend 80s pornography So, you know, um a lot of bush back in those days And so um for some reason I thought the little bit JJ was like an inch or two below the belly button I got the hairline of the crotch And so uh, so you thought a woman was like one of those uh those uh little gnomes those little belly with the jewel in her belly Dang man, that's

That's very interesting. I mean you would be a very unique Surgeon onward I was you know surging around with the old index and In the fingers and man, I was confused. I didn't know what was going on I didn't know if I fucked around and got her mask the diet or something You know, I was young But finally the girl gave me a little assistance. They helped me go a little farther down south

And got my fce Never really talked to her again But uh, yeah, that was my first cross experience shut out the sprinkled Missouri and public swimming pools Uh r.i.p. Billy comfort. So we're gonna keep your name in the street gang gang, bro. Thank you for bringing him up man I appreciate that dude. Yeah, I was looking at some uh, somebody sent me some pictures of him the other day actually And I should put some of those on the onto the uh onto the this past weekend And then we had a shirt designed for him as well. And so maybe we'll put that out, but um, yeah, but remember that dude

I remember something like that touching thinking I was you know, I didn't know what that was just kept pushing on some girl's midsection That's crazy, right just put just Just massaging some girl's fupa or something. Who knows? I mean, it was wow when you were young. I had a buddy and he used to practice touching girls on his own, um, Behold And at first I'm like that's crazy, but then I'm like I can't fault this guy

At least this guy has a little bit of lay of the land I'm out here wrote, you know You don't know what's going on Then I remember thinking that it was all a myth that girls didn't even have vaginas Because I remember laying down with this one girl up there off a Of million dollar road And that's when uh, you know, the pizza delivery guy had crashed and a lot of people had robbed him and shit But I didn't get involved in that. I was back at the house, you know trying to touch a little of that

You know trying to You just get involved in that womb tunnel. You feel me get a little into that womb and uh I don't know what's talking about but but anyway, man, uh, thanks for your story, man Thank you for calling in brother for sharing that story Looking for an easy affordable way to stock up for summer grilling as well as a great gift think Omaha steaks Right now Omaha steaks is giving a limited time father's day gift offer to my listeners Go to Omaha steaks.com and enter code

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And my mother used to put a club on the car She had a volks wagon rabbit And that thing probably worth $1100 you could get into it through the bottom. There was no Someone had or water had rotted out the paneling under the rear passenger seat You could get into the car through the bottom of it and my mother would put a club on that thing Unbelievable we laugh at her so hard But thank you mom for getting me wherever I needed to be Let's take another crotch story. Here we go

Hey, Theo, this is joy from Alaska, Georgia. Just calling in to give you my um first crotch touch story Hey joy, thank you for calling in and you know, nothing brings joy to youngsters like touching one another And uh, and so it's just ironic that you called today and thank you for being a supporter And I'm excited to come over there to george. I'm excited to get into the south a little bit later this year on some tour dates And I'm gonna add some more and I want to find some vfw chapters where we can go and do some fundraising at some of those places But I gotta A lot to do Let's hear more. Thank you for calling joy. I didn't mean to make that about me for a second. Let's go

It's a long time ago because I'm actually older than you are so But oh look crotch stories have no age. Okay Those these things are timeless. Let's go. I do remember it vividly because it was the summer between Elvis 13 turning 14 And that was back in a time where you know little kids Just rode their bikes everywhere and hung out outside and did everything all like that during the summer time And I remember there was probably about 10 of us hanging around on our little bikes And we had gone to this little area back to back of the neighborhood. Oh, yeah the back of the neighborhood Good what goes on back there? Nothing good

And everything good Let's hear more And um, just someone like the rocks and the creek and stuff these two boys pull up on their mopeds And back then, you know, I came from an area where oh, yeah the french we call them frenchmen Let's hear more Two boys pull up on their mopeds And back then, you know, I came from an area where um, that was fancy stuff So it was a cute one and actually looked at me and he was like his these boys are about 15

He looked at me and he was like, um, hey, you want to ride you want to try riding it? And I'm like, oh, yeah Hell, yeah, never been on a moped jumped on the back wrapped arms around them And uh, we took off forever young for ever, yeah Sorry, you just got me. Do you want to ride in the back seat?

You got me feeling all of this right now, you know, he gave me like a racquetball Boots getting biggy You got me feeling the past suddenly all of a sudden. Let's hear it on the back wrap arms around them And uh, we took off now. That's the first time I've ever felt something, you know Shaking in between my legs and stuff like that. So already and I've got these little cute little flimsy bike shorts on but Uh, it was already feeling kind of crazy. Plus I got my arms around this cute boy Well, we hit a bump and all of a sudden this boy Decides to just slide his hand take it off one of the controls slide his hand back behind his back

And just grab ahold of my crush Now at first I was alarmed, but at the same time it was one of those first time I've ever had that feeling about Um, do I like this or do I not? So, um, needless to say I was squealing by the time we got off of that, uh, moped and I guess the moral the story is I did like it whether I wanted to admit it at the time or not Um, and moped are fun to ride at times. So anyway, that's my first crush story Wow Wow, thank you for sharing that story it's like

Man that crotch boy That crotch is it's like a it's like You ever see you ever you ever be in a neighborhood or something you get to a certain age and you realize Oh, there's a power plant or there's like a power grid or area in our neighborhood Or you you drive by that place for years. You don't know what it is It looks like some weird wiring and there's fences outside do not enter do not enter And then one day oh, that's electricity that's shit That's that that place kills monkeys and commercials

years ago And that now that is the crotch. That's that thing. That's that electricity. That's that hub. That's that nasa I mean, it's all space. It's all space and you got that nasa Just north of yas, uh, you feel me. That's that crotch And it's really remarkable It's really really remarkable to hear that story of you on a moped a french a french mode of transportation and the boy reaches back. I mean, what a what a power move there And also love how you're not a fit. You're not like, oh, this guy molested me. That's nowadays people lose all of their shit

But the person who was involved in it, they see what's going on Oh, I made you know the guy it seemed like it was just your experience and that's what happened. You could decide if you liked it or not You weren't sure it was just a moment where we kind of decide The god didn't, you know, trap you or nothing like that or put you in a candle or anything like that. It was just a regular afternoon And I bet sometimes you see a moped go by and you, uh I bet those feelings flare up for you And that's beautiful, man. That's truly beautiful to imagine And just to reminisce and to think about that. That's life

That's life That's life And and I think it's nice to be able to share your story and also yeah, it's funny because at those at those ages things are happening And we're deciding If we like them or not Do I like this am I okay with this? Does this need to stop And this is needs to this needs to occur more. What's going on here?

And that's sexuality. That's how we develop some of our sexuality Is by having experiences that are safe enough where we could still learn and make choices and um, and I know some people that they have dark experiences Uh, but I'm glad that we're sharing ones that are you know, at least ones where we're Where we were all in a space where we could learn and have a moment of knowledge Um, you know, I remember Man, I got so many stories about this now and I guess I'll tell them a different time because I want to get into more of an episode here

um But I remember so we went to the dance when I was in school. I was a school child I mean, I was a school boy A lot of people think I was always an adult and that's insane That's insane and uh And so I will I remember we went to a dance and afterwards we went back to my buddy's house

And one of the gals from the dance came out came back there with us and my buddy ended up touching her crotch And god dude, I was so horny, bro Damn, I was horny boy. I was horny I mean, I was like a Like a try hundred seratiles. Dude. I was horny, bro. Horny horny I mean, I'm a I'm surprised poachers didn't show up and try to fuck me up because I was horny and boy And my so dude my buddy was out they went off in the woods and they were being gentle with each other's bodies like that and so

Then her mom came and got her or whatever I think her mom was a cop or something. She was out on a route or something doing police work and And I lived in this kind of place and police sometimes would show up and just shoot a gun into the woods a couple times Just empty of you know, just empty the clip right into the woods Because they figured if you out in the woods fucking around at night and you get shot You probably deserved it, you know a few in the dark woods So but yeah, her mom came by I remember and took her

And you know, it was just the time her mom was gonna come pick her up. There was no issues or nothing And then afterwards my buddy's out there And I remember just putting my I mean when they walked off in the woods. I remember putting my ear To the ground and just I just wanted to hear As much of this touch and as I could I wanted to just be as close to it as I could I was so jealous Anyway, they came back and my buddy, you know, everybody was all excited and that's when another kid's dad came out to the

We were standing on a bonfire out there another fellow's dad came out there the boy's house. It was And he came out there and uh And he ended up This is a little bit grotesque is it but it's also nature and animals do this all the time He ended up smelling my buddy's hand for about 15 minutes out there. My buddy's dad And this is my friend who just walked off into the woods and touched a gals crotch for the first time and then my buddy's dad came out And just smelled my buddy's hand for probably Not 15 minutes. That's a long probably about nine minutes

And we all just sat there and watched him just huff on this hand and just And that's nature boy and that's nature um What else are we going to do today? Oh, yeah, we got nick is going to come in and talk to us about the news a little bit And then we'll get back into a few more stories um Yeah, but send in some submissions for the single dads We're going to do some single dads

Tickets for them for some shows that are sold out all those shows are sold out and save some tickets to surprise some guys and and uh Yeah, because I just can't imagine what that's like and I don't have that experience. I didn't have a single dad But I mean, I guess I did after my parents divorced But I didn't live with my father So I don't have that experience, but I can only imagine that it's probably not that far different than having a single mother um

I'll say this Nick is going to be in with us in just a second. So Hold on All right, we got uh, nick is in studio. How's it going, man? It's going really good Uh, just trying to get this studio working order. We're making it happen in the meantime. Yeah, man. I want to thank you too, dude, man for just uh You know, I know you guys are I mean, I know we're all doing it, but Yeah, there's a lot of space to fill here. Yeah. Yeah I saw we got a little refrigerator. That's cool. Yeah some some cold waters

Uh, we're we're getting there piece by piece um Yeah, if you had to say like on a hundred percent what percent are we at right now you think Considering the most important function is being able to do the podcast. I'd say we're at 65 percent. That's good I would agree with that And there's a lot of room for new opportunity So probably 10 is room for new opportunity. Yeah. Yeah, and uh, there's like a percent

That's always going to be available because we're constantly evolving. So you'll never be to a hundred percent ideally wow I think I like it now. I thought you're right. Yeah, the goal of a hundred percent is almost kind of crazy, huh? Yeah, like what are you gonna do when you get there just disappear into the ether? Yeah Yeah, can't stop. What are you gonna do just disappear through a wall like joe rogan does sometimes according to uh, nicks watson You remember that? Yeah He said he saw uh, joe rogan eating ferret sashimi and then disappear through a wall I don't imagine him disappearing. I imagine him busting through it like the kool-aid

That's true like extremely loudly disappearing. Yeah Oh Oh, that'd be so cool to watch man, and uh, yeah, just new construction joe rogan's construction company would be so dope It just takes down miles. Yeah, just take it down walls Um, next any help us with the news. What's going on the news? Uh, let's see first up Um with the toronto raptors won win from winning the nba finals point card kyle laury's making headlines on and off the court Uh first he was chasing after a loose ball. You may have seen this jumped into the stands and uh Almost hit a lady. She moved out of the way, but then a guy a couple seats over like gave him this extra shove

He was really upset about at the time and it turned out after uh, people looked into it that uh The guy who pushed him was warriors minority orner mark stevens He's a venture capitalist and a part owner. So rich guy. Yeah real real rich guy and title rich guy and uh, he ended up The nba said he can't attend any more finals games and he can't attend any more games until they complete an investigation essentially tell people stop talking about it sounds like and then I'll be back court side and uh, yeah, um I don't know. What are your thoughts on that? Man, I'm mad. First of all, what about his the first the game when he comes back. Imagine how nervous and awkward that's gonna be

It's like whenever you got in trouble or something and you got then you had to go back to the place and it was always so uncomfortable um You know It's If he's a my he's a minority owner I I'd have to watch the tape again Like I think if someone if it's a reaction where like somebody bowls over somebody that's just sitting next to me I could have a defensive reaction

You know, uh, I've I did see it a couple times at first. I didn't even notice what they were talking about I don't remember. I was like who's pushing. I don't see that part. Um But but did it seem like more than that to you? I just felt like it was unnecessary. I kind of have a feeling the guy might have had a couple drinks And uh, he was feeling feeling loose in the front row, but it's like I just there nothing good come come from it I don't know if you remember the uh, the malice at the palace that destroyed Ron Artes, Stephen Jackson that brawl in Detroit And it's because someone threw something on the court and then the players react and they're the ones that get

Suspended for the season or worse, you know, yeah, that's a good point now. Kyle Lowry if he reacts He's the he's the he's the bad guy. Yeah, it's like it's like I don't want to compare players to dogs But if like a child's like new needlin a dog and the dog bites the kid right put the dog down, right? Yeah, that's a good point. That's true. Those players have a lot to lose especially in close proximity playing a an intense game Also a game where they've had a lot of trash talking you got fat Drake over there, you know You know so sick of Drake. Oh, dude. It's like, what do you go play at least masterpiece fucking audition to be on the team Yeah, and show the road games. Yeah, what are you doing? Yeah, you're just making it as easy as possible So I think um, I will say I used to be a Drake fan

But I'm just kind of salty because I'm a pretty big Milwaukee Bucks fan and uh, he was just all over that series and was he Yeah, it was insufferable Yeah, uh, I think Drake's just kind of I mean ever since like or even in his early work when he's like, uh, the toughest thing ever went throughout the key barred his Uncle's car and brought it back later something and I was like, this isn't There's no street credit here. I think he's a good. He's kind of like a ballad singer more to me he's more like I'm trying to think of somebody to compare him to from um, he's turned into more

Like boys to men. Yeah. Yep. I agree. I agree which I was a boys to men fan. So yeah, I can't hate I agree. I was a boys to men fan, but but I think that series is real chippy I think if you're gonna let people sit up by the front and drink alcohol then they could they could do things They don't even think about Definitely the guys in the front row of those games they they feel sometimes like they are in the game and the game almost feels Fictional when you're that close sometimes you're so used to watching it on television And then when you're up close it feels like even when I was at the MMA fights I thought fuck I might I could probably jump in, you know

I could do this like as long as I you know read the manual first Like other controls and know what x and r2 do and all of this then I could get right in there Meanwhile, the truth is if I had gotten up there Nine guys would have beaten me from behind before if I would have got in the ring Two guys would have beaten me. So I think a lot of people have that thought though I was a big entourage fan back in the day and ari gold He had courtside laker seats and he was like he got yelled out for stepping down the court And he's like I paid 30 grand for these seats. I'll check in if I want to yeah, it's the same thing

I think people you feel you have some entitlement like you're part of it when you're paying that much and you're sitting up there Right. Yeah, some entitlement. I think you're right. That's a good word for it. So does it make yeah, it doesn't make it right I think the the the punishment will probably justify what happened. I think it'll set some precedent But also these these They run the risk. There's a fine line between how close do you put people? Two to gain They they know there's you know in every half inch. There's an extra 10,000 dollars straight up. So they it's like

There must be a lot of insurance and a lot of liability policy they have there. What else we got man One more thing or did you have any other thoughts on it? Uh, just I don't know like like I said the the player is the one that stands to lose. So I don't like it. It shouldn't be allowed and I'm glad like they shut them down Now would you love to see a net a separate game afterwards or a fight afterwards? The minority owners fighting each other on court at halftime. Let's do some real shit. Yeah. Yeah Make the make the owners play each other and then and then the players can be at the stands And I don't think they would react the same. Yeah

Yeah, I'd love to see some of these snarky little minority owners out there in their, uh, structure sweaters You know have the side piece hold the banana republic sweater that they're wearing the v-neck And uh, and let them get out there and beat each other at halftime get a couple two j crews out there versus each other And uh, have them at have them go at it. Uh, but this brings us to the next story story Uh, TMZ reported that nba teams and are discussing and two have already done it Uh, they are getting rid of the term owner who for uh, majority stakeholders of the team Some people say because it's uh, predominantly african-american players

There's some rachel racial insensitivity with the term owner. Mm-hmm. What do you think about that? Um, I don't think that's crazy. We're gonna have to rewrite the dictionary at some point I mean, I don't know dude. I but I it makes me uncomfortable when I see people own the people's rights to people on television So I guess some of that I could understand but if somebody's a business owner and I'm employed at the business Then just because they have the term owner. I also have the term employee I also have the term player also have the term father or you know, whatever your other terms are. I'm a brother I'm a son. I'm not just because somebody writes an article and says that This that you're still a slave or you're still a this if you think that way that's

At a certain point. That's your own mentality I agree. I think it's just ridiculous over Overcorrection that people are doing um players like you said they're employees. They own the team like you own this podcast Right. I'm not offended if you would ever you don't talk like that But if you ever said I own this podcast, I don't think take that as you own me, right I But it's interesting. I wonder if with certain people would you use? Certain would we use certain terms differently, you know

I don't think so. I don't think it matters. I think at some point It's just people making clickbait and making trouble and a lot of times it's just lawyers like oh, well, how can we find another way? To Let's sue this way now. Let's sue this way. Oh, let's sue this way. Let's sue this way. It's like it just never ends I agree which raises insurance rates people want to buy insurance is so high because they're they allow lawyers to absolutely sue every single direction And all these lawyers that are like suing each other they They're buddies their buddies and their buddies with the judge and they just they're showing up for another day of work with their friends And it doesn't matter who's suing who they're getting a piece of it

It's crazy man. And at a certain point of the everything can only go until it goes And when he can't go anymore, it's just gonna get pretty real. I think sometimes it's alarming. I hope so Yeah So next news story Organizers in boston are planning a straight pride parade tentatively scheduled for august 31st The organizers are still working to secure a permit from the city But they just on friday named former bright bar editor and controversial figure milo yiannopoulos as the marshal for the event And he's homosexual man, isn't he? He is he is who's always

Uh, no pun intended prided himself on fighting for straight rights, ironically, right? Yeah, I mean, I'm not surprised that they have People want a straight pride parade everybody once has their own group now I feel like if anything feels more under attack these days, it definitely feels like it's straight you know, even though a lot of times they No one would write this article or something because You know, a lot of the media companies seem to be in the same group But I feel like if anybody seems under attack these days or if well, here's what I'll say. I have no idea

But to me it does feel like straight men Are under attack these days That that make you seem like if you're straight that there's something wrong with you That if you're straight that you're also then anti gay And that seems to be like a narrative that's sometimes out there that I don't like that much Um Also, it's kind of uncomfortable sometimes being a straight male a lot of men will hit on you and if you You reject them in a way that even is kind

Or don't then they will immediately call you homophobic Which is like, I'm not homophobic I just Like women I'm not homosexual. So That's cool. If you are I might be homosexual one day You know, if I do enough cocaine I could be a homosexual for a little while in a bathroom or something maybe but I don't have any intention of being full-time gay male Um, not this lifetime in a way or not. Maybe I mean, who knows if when we're 40, you know

The sugars or whatever we've been eating the riboflavin's are the one of them morphs you out next thing, you know Aspartame. Yeah, aspartame, dude, and you out there trying to tame some ass I mean it could easily happen. We don't fucking know bro People don't know the side effects of a donut stick. Okay, you think you rely being in there every morning Get you that donut stick and that thing doesn't have any side effects boy come on So I'm not surprised that they want to have that that they want to have a straight pride parade. I'm not surprised

I think it's okay. Look the cool thing about america is any group should be able to meet And just because a group meet doesn't mean that it's against your own group Like a lot of people say, oh, if they're having a straight pride that means that they hate gay or they hate this or I don't think It means any of that. Maybe it's just some dudes that want to fucking have a good time together I think I I think it's kind of silly and like, I don't know. It's like attention-seeking behavior. Yeah, like I mean Crystallia had a great great tweet about it. He said straight pride parade. Hey guys, if you're in a parade, you're gay So, uh Which is a pretty solid point

Good boy, dude. Maybe it should just be the closet in men's parade. What I don't like is if they got this guy Milo Yiannopoulos He seems to be polarizing like his whole thing is just to be polarizing I'm not saying I agree or disagree with any of his views. I don't know even what his views are but I think if you're going for somebody polarizing then that makes it kind of correct, you know Like de-legitimizes it a little bit. Yeah, it's like you're just trying to start trouble Now if you'd have got rick flair or something or dusty roads out there fuck. Whoo. Yeah, it sounds like a party It sounds like a good time. I mean nobody wore a beautiful woman's robe like mr. Rick flair

The bottom line He's he's kind of a bucket list guess for me for this past weekend Oh, man, I'd love to have him. Who else while you're in here, man. Who else would you like to get? I've been saying it From mountaintops. I want norm mcdonald in here. I think you two together would be just incredibly What's your buddy adamiga do it? Let's look you know what that's a great question adam. It was me. Oh my god He just texted me. Seriously. Yeah normer had adam

Uh, who else do I want so funny we just talked about him? I would love Uh Conor McGregor, I mean that's kind of pie in the sky. He doesn't do a ton of media appearances But uh, yeah, I feel like he hates me for some reason even though I don't even know If you ever get that feeling about Conor McGregor like he hates you even though you don't know him I think we'd be buds. I'm pretty sure We also I can bought the Conor McGregor look alike kid as well, dude Weren't you Conor McGregor for halloween as well? Yeah, a couple years ago. It was way too early

No one knew the fuck he was Yeah, dude, you were just kind of like It was 2014. No, I feel like a real thin lumberjack Irish lumberjack any other news? Uh, just a couple like kind of fun stories Semi fun a texas hiker was found alive after missing for over a week That's texas man. Loving place people get taken care of not surprised man. Yeah survived even without the water

Uh, 14 lions escaped from a south african national park Let them lose dude. Let them look I'm sure they'll find room for me to live out here in california, you know I'm sure let them loose on the streets out here in california. Bring them in. Are they are they rapists? Are they can they read can they write are they addicted to drugs? Who cares get them over here? I'm sure we can use them, you know Well, I'd love it's gonna get like that on the street soon People are like free the animals from the zoos. They can't be caged up

Let anybody can live Dr. Drew said the other day that the black plague is forming. Did you read that? Uh, I he's been talking about, uh Bacha or whatever it is blue bubonic plague. Yeah, I think that was it. You're right. You're right. He's like, yeah, it's downtown Is that what the smell of human urine is? That's a 35 minute uber ride from here. We're 35 minutes in an uber from the bubonic plague Different times, uh, thank you very much Uh, you can follow him real nick davis. You have a podcast too. Nick. What is your podcast? Oh, that's awesome of you. Uh, it's uh Some i'm embarrassed to say it sometimes

It's only taken me about 150 episodes to bring it up Uh, uh, me and a couple, uh buddies who work for the adam corolla show We recap the show the bachelor every week. Okay, and the show is called another bachelor podcast Another bachelor podcast So if you uh, if you like bachelor botch and botchalism, which is headed soon to los angeles Then uh, then you can check out the bachelor and it's every week. Uh, yep every uh, we try to get it out by thursday The episodes air monday, so cool. Yeah. Yeah another bachelor podcast You can check it out. I will say very quickly if my favorite compliment we get people who don't even watch the bachelor

Tell us they listen and they enjoy it. Really? Yeah. Yeah If you look at our itunes reviews because our whole thing it's just a vehicle for comedy It's it's it's got a built-in audience I tried to talk about the show as little as possible when I heard the podcast. Oh nice Dude, it's an interesting show I mean david spade kind of has got me into it recently because he you know He always reviews it and he likes looking at the chicks on there. So if you follow his instagram story He's always just like harping on it. He's scouting is what he's doing. He is scouting. I'm glad you noticed that

All right, we got a couple more calls that came in here the hotline [phone] Thank you guys for putting up with me On this episodes and just always on this podcast You know, I don't know what I'm doing sometimes and You know, it's weird. It's like sometimes I come in here and You know, I want to You know, like I'm scared of like oh, I'm gonna say something. They're not gonna like me or I'm gonna You know, and I try to keep those kind of thoughts out of my head and just be myself if I can

But sometimes it's hard, you know, I just sometimes I just get scared. I'm like, what do I talk about? I don't know what to do And you know what I do a lot of times when I get like that I just go I just go I just go and just keep going You know, I'm not gonna do it right. I'm not gonna make everybody happy. I'm not a you know I'm not gonna make myself happy fuck half the time Jesus

I mean if I was happy person if I was, you know, happy joyous and free if I was I don't even know if I have this podcast, you know, I don't know But I just want to just thank you guys for putting up with me no matter who I am And as I learn about who I am, you know, it's funny it's like uh It really teaches me a lot about support and about unconditional support Um, and I hope that I can do the same for you You know, whenever we have options opportunities to do that in person or uh to do that over the over the phone lines or whatever But I just want to thank you for

Just being supportive of me no matter who I am sometimes Um Because I didn't know that that's really what what support is support sometimes is being there for someone to eat no matter who they are You know, they don't do what you want or they don't behave So then what are you gonna do? You're just gonna You know, do we abandon people then? You know and you guys don't do that or you know people don't do that for me and so I just want to say thank you. Um Oh

Some great stories some great calls. Let's take another call here. Here we go. This was about feeling guilty About things we spend money on we talked about it last week a little bit Hey, Theo Uh, your last episode you talked about your friend Spending that five feet take yourself out of vacation And uh, we all kind of feel weird when we spend money on our own our dough To the savings. I know for me Have a big job and make I make good money

And I'm well and I'm able to save But I've noticed that I've strained a lot in relationship And I've missed out on a lot of opportunities in life to enjoy myself Just because I was so focused on That financial saving and and you know what I don't want to spend that money. I'd rather just save it. Hmm Isn't that interesting You know, it's so funny. I hadn't really realized until my friend brought it up And she's one of my closest and dearest friends and when she brought it up

I was like, wow, yeah It feels weird doing something special for yourself That isn't like what the norm says we need to do with our money. That isn't what the you know, the Oh, you got to do this and you got to get that and you got to do that Onward I've missed out on a lot of things in my life. I've also noticed that it's Gonna stop me from being as happy as I could be I'm trying to work on that

I'm trying to find that that middleman, you know, prepare for the future, but also Experience life and joy life Go out with two things people, you know, you care about So I just wanted to see if you Had anything you could kind of talk about see Where was that middle ground? Appreciate what you do. Love the podcast Thank you, brother. Thank you for the call

You know, I don't know as you're talking. I'm even thinking like man, how scary it is to be in a place of uncertainty How scary it is to think oh well, I don't know what's gonna happen And we used to live a little bit there more now We have so many, you know, there's everybody has a calendar and everybody has like a A planner and a text and you know when the person's arriving You know when they're gonna get there and they used to be This thing of I don't know That's why it was easier then I think to have faith in a in a higher power of any kind

Or faith just in anything it just there was more mystery in the air I don't know what's gonna happen But yeah, it's wild when you do something different, you know, I There was a piece of art that I almost bought in South Africa a few years ago and it wasn't very expensive You know as I think maybe $350 and I know that's expensive, but it was beautiful Instead I bought this other piece of art for $200 And I didn't like the other piece of art I don't even like it

And they're probably in the week that goes by that I don't think about that beautiful painting in South Africa that I could have bought for $350 And man, I just didn't want to spend that extra $150. Why? Well, because I need that money for this or for something or some Mutual fun or some shit or some I need to be able to tell my friend across the table when we're having dinner that oh I got a new IRA or I got the Why because somebody said that's what I need to do There's a there's a there's definitely a way to plan ahead But to be

Not focused on the end I think I think and somehow a lot of these advertisers and stuff they have us focused on the end And then we get there and we're like damn Oh, yeah, I'm all prepared for the end. I got money for this hospice. I got money for this but I knew every step of the way. I didn't take a risk. I didn't take a chance. I didn't You know, and I don't have an answer, you know, because I do it myself. I'll play it safe a lot The one thing I haven't played it safe with was my career

Um But I play it safe a lot So I don't know it's a good question, man um You know, I don't know You know, and there's no right way to do life. There's no We don't know what we're doing And you know, that's something I I heard I heard recently somebody say man, I hope I'm always a student

And That's where you know, I want to try and stay is in the space of being always a student if I can and I know when I Start to get in my own ego in my own will I can really feel when I start thinking I know So I hate it man. I get so sick of myself sometimes You know when we're talking last week about uh relying on others and And I and that's and then or about I don't like working with other people when Um But then sometimes I also don't like working with myself

You know and life is a middle ground, you know, you're you're asking me what the what's the middle ground? I don't I don't know but man I bet it's a beautiful place Um Yeah, so I just want to thank you guys Uh for being a part of the episode I'll see some of you this week in Portland and Seattle and Vancouver and Boise And

Yeah, I'm just thinking like how do we be brave enough to make choices that Might be different To not know what that outcome is To tell a truth that we're afraid Is going to expose us for who we are It's scary It's really scary man, it's It is off

I mean, it's a game of thrones man It's a game of thrones out here But sometimes we're all the characters And we're the castles and we're the dark corridors and we're the You know, so it just It's amazing man We're all of it sometimes Where the hell is westeros? Anyway, is it in Italy? I'm guessing

I gotta Gotta peep some of that out. Um No, maybe Newfoundland. I don't know. Um, I've never even fucking heard of it the more I think about it What I'll say is this man, let's uh, let's convene next time I want to thank everybody that called in with these magical stories from their youth And um, and again, we'll leave out here on this song. Yeah, I'm gonna think a little bit more I realized that when it comes to dealing with other people I talked about this last week I don't like to rely on others

That was the word that I finally found this week relying I Don't like to rely on somebody else It scares me At the roots of my radish This song is jameson flood every night. I lie awake. I feel like a fake I put on a show

Yes, it's just life. We're here. Thank you guys. Uh, be good to yourselves And I'm gonna try to be good to myself Um, and thank you for all the warm messages I get from a lot of people when I'm not really doing well and You know, sometimes there's been there's a lot of letters and stuff I get when I'm traveling I never read them and it's not that I don't want you to think that I don't care Some of them I feel like they're just, you know, it's to me and so I don't know if that's okay to share at a group level And then some of them, um

Some of them are insane. Some of them are cut together with newspaper clippings and shit. I'm like, this is this could be This could be a murderer. So This could be a murderer. So, but this is jameson flood every night I put on a show Every night you sleep Every night I don't play your beat You steal your things, let you know, but you still don't believe You knew, that it was me

Be alone Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, it was you