Threedom - And You CAN Do It
Episode Date: June 29, 2023Lauren, Paul and Scott talk about pennies, swimming in a lake, and listen to some voicemails. Follow us on social media @threedomusa. Send Threetures and emails to threedomusa@gmail.com. Leave us a ...voicemail at 424-252-4678 (HAG-CLAIMS-8).
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When you get a bum sharpie that sucks.
You but be a redneck.
I keep us certainly are a red neck.
When is he going to graduate to?
You are a red neck.
Does he know?
He's hedging his pants.
I'm tired of giving y'all hints.
Now I'm just pointing out, I'm your a red neck.
Your a red neck.
Your a red neck.
This whole court is a red neck.
Is he still doing it?
I hope so.
And you know what, I bet he does like,
because he hosts a game.
Never name him.
Never name him.
You have beer.
I bet he does.
The Voldemort of Comedy.
I bet he does like, corporate.
Corporates and shit like that.
Yeah, I bet he does like, special engagement kind of thing.
Oh, that's like a good thing.
I handful of times here and makes a billion dollars. Okay, exactly. I like that private jets. You might not be a red neck if you're doing that when do we get to fly on a private it?
Look, I flown on a private. I've flown on a couple. I mean the three of us are a
What's the difference? That's where it's like you're not it's you know the plane all to yourself
That's where it's like you're not, you don't have the plane all to yourself. Oh, that's what I feel on as well.
The person didn't own it.
No, no, no.
We were only us on there.
We were with strangers.
Okay.
Yeah, but it was, I'm sure I've told the story before.
No, I think this might be the rare one that-
No, I've told mine, so I'm sure you've told your-
It was a New Year's Eve where somebody said we should go to Las Vegas.
Happy New Year's Eve where somebody said we should go to Las Vegas. Happy New Year.
People just cheer. They hit the ball.
They hit the ball in the crowd while it's happy New Year.
Happy New Year. My fun go bad.
It's a fly ball.
And you were like, hey, it's the New Year. Let's get a helicopter. My fun go bad. And I'm gonna hit him fly balls to you.
And you were like, hey, it's the new year. Let's get a helicopter.
Pfft.
Pfft.
Pfft.
We took one.
That was summonating you with a bat.
We took one out of the sky.
We got out of the sky.
We by firing a baseball.
A frozen rope right to the sky.
Somebody said we should go to Las Vegas
and then we actually did, but it was not fun.
Oh. We got on the plane and then we actually did, but it was not fun. Oh.
We got on the plane and then we got there,
we realized we can't get into any hotel rooms
and now it's like, oh, you didn't have a hotel booked.
Oh, no, honey.
Well, I think we did, but we couldn't get in
because it was too, or oh, they wouldn't let us in.
Oh, no, no, no, no.
So we had to wander around the casino.
It was fucking miserable.
I hate.
Then finally got out of the room,
immediately got sick.
Oh, what?
Sick.
Like I got, it's like a bad,
or something.
It's like a bad, or something.
We were already there.
And then I just stayed in the room
and then it was time to go home.
Oh, what a great time.
Great time.
Well, my experience was I was flying
for a babysitting job.
So it wasn't.
Is that on a private jet?
Yeah.
Yeah, it wasn't a jet, right? It's just a plane.
Plane. I mean, there's a difference, right? I don't know. It was a prop plane. I don't know
it. A PJ. It was a PJ. It was a private jet. Yeah. Yeah. Whatever it was, it was private. And it was
cool. And this was someone who hired you to babysit and took a private jet somewhere. Yes,
to to color out.
So really the tell you ride?
I don't know where we were.
They all.
I think I've actually just don't know.
So the difference between you babysitting
and movie star was really, there's no difference.
No, no, because I will.
There is a more to the story, but you know.
A lot to be bored.
I'll leave it.
I'm gonna leave it as a mystery because.
Wow.
But not to us off.
But not to you off, Mike.
Yeah. But yeah,, but not too often. But not too often.
Yeah. But yeah, the pay wasn't there.
So did you hear about the pennies guy?
pennies from heaven?
Sure.
He wanted to see the time fly.
Yeah.
No, the pennies guy.
So the guy, I think he owns an auto shop and a...
Where you can get your car fixed for pennies?
Where is it?
A worker of his who got fired said,
hey, you still owe me $910.
And so the owner of the shop said,
you know what?
The owner of the shop said this.
He gathered up all of the pennies on the floor of the shop, You know what? You know what? You know what? You know what? You know what? You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
You know what?
He gathered up all of the pennies on the floor of the shop.
910 thousand.
Hold on a second.
Hold on a second.
Wait, why were there so many pennies on the fucking floor?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Did you see a fountain?
Did you see a fountain?
My theory.
Yeah. And they were peanut shells. And they were peanut shells. And they were peanut shells. And they were peanut shells into the bank and deposit them. He was crazy about it.
He must have gone to the bank to do this.
But he said he gathered up all the pennies
over the years that had been left on his floor,
dumped them on the guy's lawn.
What the hell, how many could that be?
I know it's lying.
If he did that and he dumped them on my lawn,
I simply would go to the bank and deposit that.
I would pick your racing up, penny out. I simply would pick up the penny, isn't it?
Take me to the bank. Well, wait a minute. How much do you get right now?
I even to babysit if you're on a private plane.
On a private plane.
Why do you like to take you guys?
Is it nine? Is it more than $910 an hour?
Because I think it takes more than an hour to scoop those up.
On a PJ? What I would use a copper magnet. What I was getting paid. I would use a copper magnet.
What I was getting paid was no
where near that amount.
And so if it took me one hour to pick up $900,
I would simply do that.
That's not that long.
I wouldn't bend over once to pick up $900.
I don't know.
Like $910 in pennies.
If you can't get that in the lower.
But let's say he said it'll take an hour.
Can you do it?
Will you do it? Wait, it will take an hour?
Yeah, or I will only have an hour.
It will take an hour and you can use a shovel.
Yeah.
It's a solid hour of shoveling pennies.
Yeah, shoveling hard.
Wait, you guys don't want to spend nine hundred dollars.
That's how much you don't want nine hundred dollars.
Well, no, I'm thinking about can I physically do it?
No, you can.
You can say you can
You still don't want to an hour
No, it's not that I don't want to it's like I don't think I'll make it no, but we're saying you can
Well, then yeah, okay, so it only took an hour and I absolutely can do it. Yeah, I'll do it
Fighting it well, I'm finding it because it's like, I'm thinking of my fucking back.
Yeah, you're being paid.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question.
Here's another question. Here's another question. Here's another question. Here's another question. Here's another question. Here's another question. Like shoveling pennies would you do it because like doing it once is like
No, but I'm just saying there have got to be easier ways to make $900 in general. This is all I could think you know No one is getting 900 to shovel anything. No, no, I'm saying his job. They're not so I think it was once
It's funny to settle on that as an hourly rate
I get paid
850 an hour. Hmm. What about 900? Oh my god. But don't
tell me the other employees. But you see what I'm saying? Like just once you can do anything
for 900 dollars. Yeah. Just once. Yeah. Just once. You can do anything for 900 dollars.
But as a regular job, that sounds good. I heard for like, what Would you eat a seal for $900?
It takes an hour.
All right.
Just once.
You can't do it.
For $900.
Just once, and you can do it.
It only takes an hour, and you can do it.
And you can do it for $900.
But anyway, so this guy, the owner of the shop,
left a note on top.
This should be what Instagram.
This should be what Instagram, bot on top.
This should be what Instagram bot comments are.
Like it should be like $5,000. This should be what Instagram bought comments are.
Like it should be like $5,000.
Do you have me?
It's like just once.
Shovel the pennies one hour.
You could do it 900.
I want that kind of comment.
Reply, can I do it?
So we left a note that just said fuck you on top of the pennies.
On top of the pennies.
And...
Oh, covered in cheese.
And notes that fuck you.
And so this led the guy to...
Wait, what did the notes say?
Just fuck you.
So it led to the guy complaining, you know, to...
The better business, the better.
Something like that.
Judge Judith, who settles worker disputes out of now.
But not HR. But not a charge.
But, uh, they have Phil CIO.
Which then led to the guy basically getting investigated
and him now a judgment.
Which guy?
The owner of the shop.
Okay.
Now a judgment has come down that he owes $40,000
to all of his employees for overtime fees
that he never paid.
That's why you just pay up and move on.
Pay up and shut up.
Yeah.
But good, everyone's getting what's there.
Yeah, anybody's gonna pay them all in pennies
and they're gonna be like,
God damn it, he got us in it.
I mean, it is legal tender was his excuse.
So $40,000 an hour and you have one hour
to pick up $40,000 worth of pennies.
Wow.
But you can do.
Wait, wait, wait, wait. $40,000, one hour, I can do of penny. Wow. But you can do. Wait, wait, wait, wait.
$40,000, one hour.
I can do it.
Yeah, I think you can do.
And I'll get the $40,000.
Yes.
In pennies, I have to take them to CoinStar.
Yes.
But I wouldn't take it because I'm so sorry.
You can have this as a whole.
CoinStar takes a percentage.
So I think they take eight percent or something.
I'm not, I'm not going to.
A bank won't, right?
Yeah, no.
They say, well, why don't people go to a bank in this?
So they don't want to wait in line?
I think you, I don't know if you can bring
a bunch of them.
No one went to the bank for this.
I don't think you can bring change.
You can bring change to a bank anymore?
You used to be able to.
How come I don't think you can bring change?
But wait.
I think they make you roll it up.
They make you roll it up.
That's why.
That's why.
They make you roll it up.
It's 40,000 dollars.
That's how the bank doesn't need any more roll it up.
It's $40,000.
You're a roll of money.
It's $40,000. You're awful. it for me. It's $40,000.
You're awful, you get it.
In pennies.
And I'm gonna always let you count to it.
And I will do it.
And I get $40,000.
That's right.
And coin start takes eight percent.
And you must go to the coin start.
All right, I'll do it.
And the coin start is not at the supermarket.
Near you, it's a couple neighborhoods away.
$40,000 in pennies, that's my whole trunk problem.
But you can do it.
Okay, but I can't.
I can't do it.
Because of your support that we're kind of not including.
So yeah, I can shovel the pennies.
You're the one who came up with the you can do it.
No, no, but I'm like, let's take it a step further,
because yes, I can shovel them.
You can do it, and it's easy.
And you can, and it's easy.
Yeah.
But what about when I put them in bags
and I have to carry them into the coin shop?
No, you can't do it.
Yeah, you can't do it.
That's hard.
And you have to pay like a kid who's around.
So one of the bags of pennies, which could equal thousands,
is going to him.
As his one bag.
Did you hear the other about the other bags are huge?
That's right.
That's right.
That's right.
That's right.
That's right.
The bags are huge.
Yeah.
Did you hear about the other pennies story in the news?
It was just like a radio show.
Some people with their, did you hear about the other pennies
story?
This guy, a beautiful foul submarine, somebody threw a pennie
into make a wish and it just threw everything off.
It is Submarine story, which by the way is long over time, anyone's here.
In every sense of the word.
Yeah.
They're all okay.
Yeah.
Isn't that nice?
It's so cool you can tell the future now.
And they're giving away all their money.
Yeah.
So the other penny story is they, someone found with their dead mother, something found like bags and bags of pennies
up in the attic, and they're trying to sell them off.
Aside unseen, I think it's like $6,000 worth of pennies,
but they're trying to sell it off for like,
tens of thousands of dollars of like,
because there might be rare pennies in the room.
My dad tried to get me into coin collecting,
like penny collecting, and it's like,
so fucking boring, and we would go to the penny store and be like
well what about this 1910s yeah what about you know it's just
we've got this we've had a
did I share this interesting factoid there so there was this thing that I kept saying online that if you put a
copper penny into your
base with
if you put a copper penny into a light on the
base so you have two lips in.
I bet you've earned.
Two lips.
Two lips of flower.
Two lips of flower.
You put a penny in the vase.
You're filthy.
It keeps them sticking straight up for weeks.
Now, I'll tell you what I did it, and it did work.
The other thing is that you also have to poke,
you can poke the pennies with a needle in the stem.
It is a needle.
It's getting as a needle and it stands upright, okay?
You poke the pennies.
And this is something Flores too.
You poke the pennies with the pen.
They will poke the tulip, the stem, with the needle.
You did with a needle.
I said, Penny.
Where do you get this needle?
You're sewing, kid.
What?
What if I needed first sewing?
Well, you put it back.
What if I was sewing emergency? What if I tear it for sewing? Well, you put it back.
What if I was just sewing emergency?
What if I tear a hole in my elbow when I'm doing this?
What, anyway, that I saw an update about the copper penny situation.
And what the reason why they always say copper penny is because
not all pennies are copper.
That's right.
After 1980, they're not copper anymore.
You just lavering.
So you put it by pennies were old.
If you have an old penny, it works.
Yeah. And by the way, most of my pennies were old. If you have an old penny, it works. Yeah.
And by the way, most of my pennies, not recent.
Really?
Isn't that interesting?
Why do you have pennies?
I have change.
I use cash sometimes.
And are you inspecting them?
Well, I am now, because I'm saying, I only want these good ones.
OK, so do you remember this commercial?
And I think it was for nightquay or something?
Barbara you up.
Barbara you up and then she finally goes I am now.
Do you remember this commercial?
I can't see.
Raise the seat.
See, I can't reach the pedals.
Lower the seat.
No.
What?
At least two different people are one person that they're doing.
Was this you when people got on the duck boat?
Yeah.
Oh my god, it wasn't a duck boat though.
It was, it should be the duck boat.
It should have been, it would have been cooler.
In my mind, it's the duck boat.
Honestly, I might go on one of those tours this summer.
On really?
Just so you can say, hold on a second, let me do it.
Yeah, let me scream this out.
No, but there's the one architecture tour
in Chicago is really good.
Right.
It's 60 minutes on the river. And you can do it. Yeah, you can do it. And it is fun. And you
can afford it. And you will. And you can. Yeah. If you had a job and you know those, those
game show tubes that blow around the, the dollar bills and all the money. Yeah, the booth.
Yeah, the booth. Yeah. I got one of those for a new shut up sketch. And it was really
fun. There was kind of these little kids thing. I got one of those for a new shut up sketch and it was really fun.
There was one of these little kids thing I went to recently like a little carnival. Uh-huh.
And they had these little papers swirling around the kids were all grabbing us really cute.
So my question is if I was cute when I was in it. I don't know. It's fun for I'll show you.
Okay, there's a gift. It's fun for three minutes, right?
But say it was your job. I was in there for 90 minutes.
And you can do it. Did you get 900?
What'd you get?
I got $900.
Say it was your job and you got to keep whatever you grab,
but you had to do it 40 hours a week.
Would it still be fun?
Oh my God, that'd be so mad.
And you got to keep whatever.
So I mean, do they just keep pumping dollar bills?
He has to do it. keep pumping dollar bills in there?
Oh, what's the damage?
Is it $1 or is it?
Would you feel nauseous?
I mean, like, they throw hundreds in there every once in a while.
And is that your pay?
Yeah, that's your pay.
Oh, I do that.
Whatever you kept.
Fuck, 40 hours a week.
It's a good job, though.
That's a good job, though.
Like, you know.
Benefits?
Like, there would be sometimes where you like, I just need a break and you would not be grabbing the money,
but it would feel like wasting time and wasting time.
Oh right.
You're breaking, you know what I mean?
You would still take place in the book.
Yeah, you'd just be sitting there.
It would fall.
If you had time to leave, you're gonna be on your own.
You're gonna be on your own.
You're gonna be on your phone.
You're gonna be on your phone.
You're gonna be on your phone.
Okay.
But you'd be tempted just to be like grabbing the air.
I think everyone's not bothered to be like grabbing the air. Everyone's not like,
like scrolling my phone.
If you could do whatever you want,
the whole thing.
It's just making a call, a constant call.
Yeah, I think if it was minimum wage,
you get paid minimum wage,
no matter what you do in there.
Yes, you get, it's like a waiter.
So you can send a whole.
Oh yeah, minimum wage.
But then you can send a whole time
if you just were in a bad mood.
Right.
Because people are looking at you.
You have to be performing.
And people would yell at you if you were late to work.
I know everything that's in regular.
It's all the things that happen.
What if no one can see you?
You're just in a dark room doing this.
The only light is inside the booth.
Right.
So you can see the dollars.
Right.
And no one's watching you.
And they're sure you there are no cameras.
And you're like, why is this happening?
They won't tell you.
Yeah.
You want to get paid or not?
Yeah.
The job market is rough.
So you guys are saying you both do it.
I, I would like to be in charge of it.
So you just wanna yell at me.
That's what I want.
You want to be the person who's,
I would never yell.
You'd want to be the manager.
I would never raise my voice.
What's another weird job that?
Jukekeeper.
Zookeeper.
Yeah, delivery repairman.
Wait, so a delivery man repairman?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You repaired the delivery man?
Delivery repairman.
What are you repairing?
Delivery, boxes broken, anything with tape.
So you're repairing the boxes?
Yep.
What don't you get?
Hey, does someone bring you something in a bag?
I can fix it.
Put it in a box.
Did you ever get a Styrofoam container?
It doesn't squeak right?
Too squeaky, not squeaky enough.
Hey, how about that padding that comes in sometimes things?
And you can melt it.
And you can.
And you can melt it in the sink with the water.
That's cool.
Oh yeah.
Are we supposed to be using Styrofoam anymore?
No. Like every once in a while it comes in a box that I get.
Oh man, so are we putting peanuts in there? Like are you f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f-f with this biodegradable, multiple, delicious styrofoam. I mean, no, what?
And you put it in the sink
and you turn the water on and it goes away.
No, I like this.
Yeah.
Like the raccoon trying to eat the cotton candy.
You go to clean it and it disappears.
Would you do a human zoo for money?
Oh, absolutely.
Like a slaughterhouse five.
I would run a zoo.
Well, like you sit in the zoo.
Yeah, it's you.
Oh wait, no, I would run one.
Oh.
You just want to be management. Yeah.
I need a zookeeper to human zoo. Your hunger for power is actually kind of sickening.
And I just want to take care of things. Yeah, that's one of the meaningful job. It'll
be weird to have a human zookeeper at the human zoo. Yeah, that seems a little bit
wrong. It's like a zebra. A zebra in a uniform. Yeah.
Holly like Zebras.
It's pretty fun.
Wait, a Zebra uniform is its stripes.
No, that's his skin, buddy.
That's his fucking skin.
So what?
I think you can take it off at night when he goes to sleep.
Do you think it's a horse and jail?
You dumb dumb.
There's presents where they still use that uniform.
Well, a horse is too bad.
I love it.
The strap is so retro, I love it.
Super-etro, do you think the prisoners feel that way too?
They're like, ooh, they got the fit.
They're like, this is kind of throwbacky.
Yeah.
But a classic drip.
What about the ones where they die the uniform's pink,
just to ask him.
That's padding too.
That fucking guy.
No, it's in real life too.
Padding too.
There was a guy that did that in real life.
When he would serve them like Rance of Bologna and all that, was it in Texas? I forget where it was. Oh, in Padding too, it's it's in real life. Paddington too. There was a guy that did that in real life. And he would serve them like Rance of Bologna
and all that.
Was it in Texas?
I forget where.
Oh, in Paddington too, it's a sweet error made by a little bear.
Yeah.
And then it ends up being charming.
It's very charming in Paddington too.
That was in real life.
That was in real life.
Do you remember the the fjurer when somebody...
Diff your her?
Yeah, I remember.
Do you remember the fjurer?
Oh, I remember.
Do you remember?
Um, uh, when Paddington too had a perfect rotten tomato score. Yeah. Oh, I miss you. Do you remember?
When Paddington 2 had a perfect Rotten Tomato score, yeah, 100, and then somebody gave it like four stars.
No, why did they have to do that?
Yeah, exactly.
That's what everybody said.
Paddington 2.
It's a mass hole.
Yeah.
It's a fabulous film.
It really is.
It really is.
We're not sponsored by him.
No, and we can be, and I'd love to be in Paddington 3,
but I think it's too late.
Yeah, yeah.
It is too late for you. Yep. Is there a unit?
I'm still in the next.
Okay. Is there a unit? What?
Are you in it?
Are you in it? I'm patting it.
Our unit.
Is your unit in it?
All right, we have to take a break.
We're back. We're back.
We watched Paddington won after we watched Paddington too, because we'd never seen it.
Uh-huh.
It's fucking great.
It's great.
No, it's great.
I think Paddington do, of course, is a little more.
I think you watch in order because...
I think you have to watch in order because everything has to escalate in a sequel.
And if you watch it backwards, you might you might go like oh that was a little more
tank restraint we watched it frontwards we didn't watch it backwards or sitting facing
your backs the TV back to each other yes we were yes well we were tied up oh
yes I broke it all home they tied it shares Indiana Jones and, and his dad style, and his dad style. I got to think the, it was the dog's name.
The last crusade.
What a terrible father.
We name the dog a drama.
He sucked and he never stopped sucking.
And he never apologized.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Indiana Jones.
Yeah, Jones is dad.
I haven't seen that since I was a kid.
The new Indiana Jones is coming out this week or possibly next.
Indiana Jones.
And you haven't revisited all three or all four of them.
Okay, you're right.
I need to do this now.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yeah.
I'm going to watch them all.
I hate watch the crystal skull since it came out.
This part is not getting shorter.
Hate watcher.
Hate watch.
Hate.
I hate going to watch it.
Do I get it?
I need to watch it again before this now.
What's the crystal skull?
It's scary. You're not going to like it. Oh this. What's the crystal skull? It's scary.
You're not gonna like it.
Oh, okay, I'm too scared.
Oh, I mean, well, do you know,
have you heard of a skull,
the stuff that's underneath like this part of your flesh?
I don't have that.
Women just have little faces.
Fuller.
Stelicate and feminine in our faces are just all cartilage.
We don't fart, we're not bones.
Yeah, I gotta watch it.
I mean, it was terrible.
I had three or a couple of parts I would.
I bet I would find it.
I find the revisiting any movie.
Like that kind of movie.
It's always a little better than I remember it being.
Yeah, I guess because I'm prepared for it this time.
Although I watched a dark track first contact the other day,
and it was worse than I remembered it.
Oh man, I think that's considered the best one.
It is.
I really like it.
It was a little slight after I watched it,
because mainly because I've been watching so many episodes.
I thought it was directed really well,
but it just felt like.
Freaks a, yeah, freaks.
Yeah, I don't know.
I mean, I'd love to watch it start track. I just can't. Yeskes, yeah, Frakes. I don't know.
I'd love to try and adjust.
Have you ever watched Star Trek?
Yes, I watched Star Trek.
So you can't do newcomers about it?
No, I haven't watched enough to not be able to do that, but I just can't do that.
You can't do it?
Were we on an episode?
No, but you can't do it.
Or was I?
You can do it.
Yes, we had nine.
I'll pay you $900.
Tony and I had you in the pool.
I was on your podcast. Yes, on Star Trek. I also think I'll pay you $900. Tony and I had you in the pool. I was on your podcast. Yes.
On Star Trek, Audrey.
I also think I might have done Alice.
What are we?
I can't remember if I did that.
I bet you did back in the day.
Yeah.
So I've watched a couple episodes.
Great.
They are actually kind of funny.
Like the one, was it the baseball one that I watched with you?
That's not my favorite episode, Forshore.
But I found it so weird that I couldn't believe it.
You're a Nielix person, right?
What does that mean?
Oh.
Don't just say I'm something.
There's a character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix.
A character on your Netflix. A character on your Netflix. A character on your Netflix. A character on your Netflix. A character on your Netflix. Yeah, Nicole loves Jar Jar. Nicole loves love Jar Jar! I would love to see you there.
And we loved, we loved all my best always.
I would love to see you in a Jar Jar type role.
I would love to see you in a Jar Jar type role.
I mean, you're always in a Jar Jar type role.
I would like to see a Jar Jar type role in me.
Oh, is that right?
You want Jar Jar big fat dick?
It could fit you.
It probably looks like a tail.
Like an avatar?
Yeah, I've never seen their penises, but yeah.
They, well, they have braids that they stick into the... What? Oh, an avatar? They have braids,
they stick into, what? Into holes. That's how they sex. That's how they sex. I can't believe
when I'm hearing. There's so much, there's so many dumb concepts in the avatar universe
that really bothers me. That's so sick.
What's the word, an EVITANIUM?
Why does the hair create sperm?
Who said it did that to you?
Why isn't it on their face?
Why does the braid go in the hole?
The braid goes in the hole or else it gets the hose again.
Avatar made silence of the lambs.
Silence of the avatar.
Or else it gets the
Hosnoget is a thing that we say a lot in my house. I feel like we say a lot here.
You threaten Jamie with it. No, we just like say when you keep her in a
well. We say it very casually. If anything begins with it does this, right?
We're talking about a machine or something. It tells us it's a
russigan. I feel like you guys have fun.
What a great one.
We do have fun.
I gotta say, should we swap houses for 30 days?
Let's wife swap.
Not wife swap, but just house swap?
Just house swap.
Oh yeah, I do that.
30 days?
Why 30 days?
Jesus.
I don't know, that's a long time.
It's a long time to be away from this day. It's a long time to be in someone else's house
and you're not that far from your own house?
That is annoying.
Well, you're not in another place.
You can drive by and say, hide your house.
Can I say, we took a little weekend trip to Lake Arrowhead.
Wow.
There's another day and it was so delightful.
And we realized it's our first family trip
without going to visit family or for work And we realized it's our first family trip
without going to visit family or for work.
Yeah.
We got to like just have a family trip
and it was so fun.
That's very nice.
Did Holly enjoy, did she go in the lake?
Did she just look at the lake?
Did she hover above the lake?
Well, did she drink a bottle of red water?
None of us went, yeah, she actually did that.
Yeah!
None of us went into a lake because it wasn't.
Not even like Arrowhead? You can't go into it. It's private
Private lake. Yeah, you have to like it's all the houses private lake
You can't just swim there, but Lake Gregory is 15 minutes away
And I guess you can go to that but we just but Lake arrowhead is the star of the show
They call it like arrowhead. You say you went to lake. I did go there. I walked around near a private plate
This I hate this look. It A private plate. I hate this.
Look, it's good.
I hate your trip.
It's beautiful.
I had a great time.
The cabin was great.
There was a bad taste in my mouth.
Okay.
Were you on the lake though the cabin?
No.
Oh, because it's private.
But it was, we walked down and we were trying,
well, the shops are on the lake.
So we were like a couple restaurants.
So we were on the lake in those moments.
Oh, yeah.
But then when we were, we went on a walk.
Can you go and do a shop, like a bathing suit shop,
put on a bathing suit and jump right in the lake?
Look, I probably could.
I don't know.
I'd look at you saying, I'd be jumping right into a pile
of huge fish that are like two feet long.
Two feet?
The fish that were swarming by the,
swarming, sorry, say swimming.
They were swarming. They were, they were, they were right by the edge. Peopleming, ew. Sorry, say swimming. They were swarming. Swarming?
They were swarming.
They were right by the edge.
People were feeding them with some food you could get.
And some food you could get.
Why don't you think it's okay to you about this?
Well, I didn't know it was in the bag,
but it was bread crumbs or something.
What's in the bag?
And they were duts and then they were all swimming
with the fish were huge.
I did the video.
Tell me Instagram.
But you don't know what kind?
I don't diagnose fish. Was it inside?
No, there wasn't. Did this make the grid? It's on the grid. It's in my slides.
We'll just see about this. Go to my leg arrowhead post. You can see the the big
ass fish at the end. Well, that sounds fun. How long will you be there?
Three hours. Three nights. And it was really fantastic. It was really relaxing.
That does. I don't often do things like that.
How do you, do you need to bring a lot of a kutramon?
We brought so much shit and there were still shit that we didn't have.
That where you're like fucking shit.
Like I didn't bring like Holly's bottle brush cuz I was like, I'm gonna just wing that.
And then I was like, I really wish I had that.
But it, how much space could a bottle brush take up?
It doesn't, but it's like, I was, I was, I was, I was putting in so many things and
I'm, and, and it was kind of being noticed by Mike that I was putting.
Oh, okay, you're bringing a lot of clothes for a few days, bringing it. I'm like, yeah, but it's everything that we could need.
And then I, at a certain point go, okay, I'm not going to bring my shampoo. I'll just use whatever they have.
I'm not going to bring my, this, I'm not going to bring that.
Excuse me. Is this your swarm of fish?
Oh my God. What a disappointment.
There's like four more intense. Oh, was it? IRL. Yeah, really? Yeah, what a disappointment. There's like four years. It was a little more intense.
It was a little more intense.
Oh was it?
IRL.
Yeah, really.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
IRL.
Yeah, no, it was a million fish.
No, no, I was.
And it was warming.
And the one fish jumped out of the water.
And said, don't you come in here.
And then the other fish, this is private.
How about this one?
Here, how about this one?
That's how big they are, bitch.
Fuck.
Let me see this.
She got me. Those are ducks. She thinks she's a fish. Look at the fish's how big they are, bitch. Fuck! Let me see this. Got me.
Those are ducks.
She thinks she's a fish.
Look at the fish, how big they are.
I think anything on the water is a fish.
Why won't anyone corroborate?
I'm sorry, but you're crazy.
That's not true.
Those are the smallest fish of this time.
I don't mean to gaslight you, but you're crazy.
I'm not gonna be posting that.
And everyone knows.
There are no fish there.
Okay, whatever, it was a great time. That's so fun. Did you have a nice father's day? Oh, yeah, was your first father's day
Yeah, it was good. It was I mean she could stand to be a little more demonstrative. Yeah, considering the day
No, okay, so she was you are assured at one well honestly though
Here's what I need to tell you about that your I'll show up with the circumstances. You're raising her, so whatever she doesn't know is on you.
So if you have a problem, it's not her about Falcons,
didn't you?
Yeah.
Why didn't I do that?
Yeah.
Yeah.
But no, the shirts were so cute.
You both had my first-
Shirt.
Very adorable.
It was very adorable.
Yeah, it was good.
We just, we went to a-
You guys looked very cordial together.
Yeah, no, we- She's been flammered out like an agreement. That was good. We just we went to it. You guys look very cordial together. Yeah, no, we she's been clamored out like an agreement. It's good for the sake of the photo
Yeah, I think that's the sake of the gram. Please do it for the gram for the gram of the gram
What are you putting on your lips right now? Well some sort of bomb? Well, I'm putting on or is it just some magic or what are you called?
TCA TCA
Call of a gibberish
It actually is funny to you ask me what I have to tell you what I am putting on my lips because it's funny that you said
What are you putting on your lips right now?
It's it's funny. Yes. It's called the balm for nipples. This is a like
breast
Why are you doing this? Because she wants to suck on nipples.
I don't understand this.
This is disgusting.
But it's a really good lip balm.
Your lips and your nipples are not made of the same meat.
No.
Meat.
They're two different meat.
They're two different meat.
Like, move on.
Move on.
I didn't want to bring this up, but you said you said
just specific question that I had to.
But yeah, man, you know what?
That wasn't a specific question it's like I'm gonna
just say it's my ingrown isabel if any lady out there is interested in
fingered by isabel ingrid and isabel
Jesus Christ you all are discussing we've ruined Paul
there's even a shred of really episodes to get to the point where you are
saying y'all are disgusting
Everything got ruined. Yeah
This is a fucked up planet. We've
This post-COVID post-COVID world. It is a post-COVID world even though COVID is still in the world. It's true
But COVID ruined our brains didn't it? Yeah, probably as a world. Yeah, yeah as a
Can you believe that happened that we just cook
We didn't do anything for a couple years. It's a
Remember how to look at directly. Yeah, it is remember how like
Wonderful it was when you saw someone in person during that. Yeah, like like we would be so giddy to see each other now
So like fuck now. It's horrible
I've gone back to despising the human race. Yeah, good.
Anyways.
I don't buy the Sonic.
It's reciprocal.
I'm not a Miss Anthrop.
No.
Great play by Molly Air.
I'm an Anthrop.
Yeah.
Love people.
Anthropod.
Oh my God.
I had, I keep flashing and I had the weirdest dream.
And I think you guys were both in it.
Oh no.
Where?
No, no.
It was good.
We went to this place, a big group of us went to this place that's like, are you familiar
with Meow Wolf?
Yeah.
No, what's happening?
It's a really fun, interactive kind of installation art thing.
They have one in New Mexico.
Is it in New Mexico?
New Mexico?
New Mexico?
Yeah, it's going to say Santa Fe, is it Santa Fe?
Yes.
And then Marfa, Texas. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico. New Mexico And in the dream it was that interesting, but like times a million it was like almost like you were taken to another
Wow, but it was very like dark and kind of a black lady aesthetic and it was very trippy when you felt like you were on drugs
This was a dream that I hog
You miss that part of it
I'm giving you facts about meowulf, and yet you're talking about a dream.
Because you don't need to give me facts about meowulf.
He knows that I was the one that asked, have you been there?
Oh, you've just insulted him.
To his own.
Oh, Lord is in slow motion.
She's realizing what happened. But it was like, I don't want to. Oh, I think what happened.
Oh, but it was like, I'm gonna musta me when I'm throw up.
It's one of those dreams where I want to go back to that place.
Wait, during this little moment,
did you throw up?
Trying to throw up right now.
I'm trying.
Oh, it kind of does that.
That's for me.
So, wait, what was our what was our
POV in this dream we were having fun. Yeah, we were having fun
It was kind of eerie and kind of scary, but it was like I want I want to get back into that dream land
Yeah, how do I do it? Oh, I love that feeling we got to do something like that
Is that I mean if you are able to loosen dream
something like that. Is that, I mean, if you are able to loosen dream,
which people go on and on and on,
they won't shut up about.
Are you able to program where you're gonna go
before you go to sleep?
I, that would be great if you could like set a program.
Because that shit's still in my brain somewhere.
Yeah, you know what I mean?
You could probably let,
I bet you could focus on it as you're going to bed
and like it would actually help you go to sleep.
Focus.
What do I have to look at, a penny?
But there's gotta be a coin in the bed.
Do you only remember the dreams?
It's in the Asaneteal.
Do you only remember the dreams
that you have right before you wake up?
Cause that's, or do you?
Well, it's a bit, but haven't you had dreams
where you felt like they lasted all night
at the entire time you were asleep?
Right.
It feels like a really long dream,
like a story that keeps unfolding.
And with chapters.
With chapters with verses.
There's a Bible there.
And a great preacher who's telling me
that things can be different.
Yes.
If you, I think you might have died at a certain point.
You know, they revived you? Wait, am I dead? I think you might be dead at a certain point they revived you wait
am I dead? Oh
What if this was your heaven?
How complemented us that would be so sad
You never see Jane here always just doing three dumb
Well, she hasn't died yet. We haven't died yet
We're all dead does everybody come here with?
Everyone we've ever talked about on the podcast ends up here.
I went to a concert last night.
Last night.
Yeah.
Oh yeah, what was that?
Loving Rockets.
They were great.
Who was better?
Rockets.
Probably get the ads.
Yeah, I think.
They're pretty cool.
Yeah, they're great.
But so legitimately, 100% of the crowd was standing.
And...
There were seats or there were not seats.
There were seats, but like the minute they came out,
everyone just rose to their feet.
Which venue?
The Ace, where we perform mini-tops.
Oh yeah, absolutely.
I wrote Stumping Grounds.
That's right.
People don't stand the whole time we do, or show?
We don't either.
And I felt like... We wish we felt, I always feel kind of bad
for like standing up during a concert
because I'm tall and I go like,
oh, I wonder if it's okay,
but I was on the aisle and I think it's fine,
or whatever, but.
Well, everyone's standing.
What are you gonna do?
And there's no way I can see if,
unless I stand, right?
That's just how it goes.
That's the thing. If it's spotty if, in the S.I. stands. That's how it goes. That's the thing.
If it's spotty, I will always sit.
Right.
And I also have a rule of concerts of like,
I don't get mad at anyone for doing whatever they want.
Because we're all there, it doesn't matter.
Yeah, absolutely.
You know what I mean?
So I've been at concerts,
we went to John Legend once where some people
were yelling at teens for like dancing during the show.
That's so annoying.
That's like the whole point out.
That makes sense to a John Legend show.
I know.
Sit down.
What are you even doing here?
This is for us.
But so three songs in, I get this tap on my shoulder.
And I turn around.
There's this like older, long-haired, gray-haired hippie
going, do you mind moving over so I can see?
And I think to myself, what's going on?
I look behind and he's sitting down.
He's the only one in the entire place sitting down.
And he's not going to be able to see if you move over.
And so I go like, what, he, is that doesn't make any sense?
By the way, I was over a little bit over, like,
say the plane of where I should be because otherwise I need to stand on a, like, bump for the aisle.
Which was uncomfortable.
Fuck that.
You had your reasons.
Can I ask you what does that mean?
The bump?
You know, there's, like, a little bump of, like, a separation between the aisle and where the seats are.
Does that make sense?
Like, where the carpet is?
Like, a carpet-
Yeah. Now I got you.
So it's like a hard bump,
but if I were to stand on the seat.
So you're a mat now.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
But I went, okay, sure.
And I tried to be accommodating,
and I moved over and stood on the bump,
which is uncomfortable.
Oh, tough.
And then during the two hit songs,
I suddenly get shoved and I look behind me
and this old hippie guy is wildly maniacally dancing.
What?
What?
What?
From sitting down and being angry that he could barely see
to-
The drugs kicked in.
I may be, but-
Hey man, I'm waiting for my show.
And then my dad can't be in to, I'm gonna hit you.
I'll tell you when I can get up, but until then get out of my way.
And he's just flailing about in like with no, and so then I was like, with wild abandoned,
with wild abandoned, I was like, oh why was I feeling bad about this?
So I just stood where I wanted after that, because if you're gonna, first of all, if
you're gonna be crazy, I will about this. So I just stood where I wanted after that, because if you're gonna, first of all, if you're gonna be crazy,
I will say this, I don't like to stand at shows.
I don't either, but this one was,
it was only 90 minutes.
But if everyone stands, you have to stand to see.
And, but sometimes, like, depending on what it is,
I might take a little break and just sit down there
and my little cave.
Sure, I do that.
And sometimes I sit on the seat that's up,
so I'm like half in the same room.
I'll do that sometimes.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
What I don't get, I don't quite understand it
because I guess I understand the music moves you
to stand, if you're gonna dance a little bit.
It stands a little bit.
It's a bit.
But I mean, people, it's not like,
now we're all just standing. We paid for these fucking, people sound like, now we're all just standing,
we paid for these fucking chairs.
Yeah, what if we now-
Now we're all just-
It gives energy to the show,
whereas if you're just standing there listening to music,
there's no, especially for like a loud rock show,
there's no-
I disagree.
Yeah, I get it.
I totally disagree.
I have most of the time I sit at a show.
I totally disagree.
Well, it's like, but they're bringing the energy.
The band is bringing it.
But so when you do a show, are you fine
if it's a totally silent crowd
that is just sitting there judging you?
You want them to give you some energy back.
Yeah, and they do.
And they're sitting down.
Well, that's what we were doing.
And they're sitting down.
You can't tell me.
You're exasperated about it.
Well why doesn't the band just want to hear us laugh?
Why can't we just laugh?
That would be so crazy.
Why can't we just sit and laugh the whole time?
Why would I laugh whenever I would be dancing?
What if comedy shows and rock shows swapped audiences?
For 30 days, how could you?
And you can do it.
Using would it be?
They play a song, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da 30 days, and you can do it. You sing would it be they play song down and everyone goes,
ah, and then we're like stupid joke and they're like,
we already have that unfortunate.
That does exist already.
All right, we have to think.
And we're back.
And guys, what if we listen to voicemails?
We have so many.
I'd love it.
I have voicemails.
I don't like when my voicemails clogged.
Now listen, let me tell you something.
We have a phone number and we're allowed to because we're all grown-ups.
Yeah, my mom's a good-
They say it was okay.
And I don't have my phone, and it's red, and it lights up,
and it's like, we're going to have a board call.
And it has my own voicemail, and when you leave,
I hear it no one else makes me have a hearing.
And I call the 900 numbers, and I learn about sex.
What if you called 900 numbers?
Are they still here?
And it was like, I'd like to learn about sex. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa I really want to meet you and then we can, I can show you my nudes and then we can start going out
or whatever.
And it's like, it's a billion different addresses.
It just sending out BCC, slut emails.
BCC, it started.
It's from slut.com.
But they send it to all sluts or BCC.
They send it to like a thousand people
with a similar email address to you.
It must be.
I can't see any other email addresses.
Because that's what used to happen, right?
Yeah.
You would see like,
You know, it'll still get stuff like that where it's like,
you went at $100 to Best Buy,
and then you see that it sends like anybody
whose emails start similar.
Yeah, and now these people are like,
we should do BCC.
That's the decent thing to do.
It's the least you could do.
Yeah, but it's so, let me see.
I'm gonna have one, I can show you.
Because it's been happening since,
it started Saturday
and it's been like 20 a day since then.
I bet I have a new one right now.
I bet I have these in my inbox somewhere,
these bloody maples.
I guess I kind of did save those bloody maples
in my ston.
Yeah, here we go.
This is from Sarah Buckingham.
And-
Sarah Buckingham, what a classy name.
If you want to write to her, it's S-R-A-J-A-S-D-6-9.
Ooh, a G-M-L-L-L-G-M.
And-
Wait, if you put a 69 in your email,
you're down for whatever.
That's right.
And this is at least 69 in my book.
This is not necessarily. This is a forwarded message. 69 in your email you're down for whatever that's right and at least 69
This is a forwarded message and the subject is I'm always wet thinking about you I'm always and this is a BC is that what thinking like a verb thinking or she's wet. I'm always wet thinking
Oh my god allow me to wrap
Allow me to wrap allow me to what
Allow me to wrap my legs around yeah allow me to wrap. Allow me to what? This is so funny. Allow me to wrap my legs around you.
Allow me to wrap that.
A la la la.
Allow me to wrap that.
Hold on a second, you're gonna like it.
Allow me to wrap that juicy beef using my thick bread.
So, thick what?
Bread.
What?
The least sexy orange in tears.
My thick bread. That makes me sick.
That makes me sick.
That makes me sick.
That makes me sick.
That makes me sick.
That makes me sick.
Let's make your wildest dreams come true.
And then in bold.
My thick bread.
I know you want this so message me tonight.
Oh my god.
People respond to that.
Well, that's what I did.
Yeah, it works.
I have to think.
It's a fucking crazy.
Yeah. It's what it works. I guess it works. I have the thing. It's crazy.
Yeah.
It's crazy to me.
I mean, the ones I think that work are the ones like blackmailing you.
The masturbating.
The masturbating one.
And I have all your videos of what you jerk off.
Send me $256 now.
And Bitcoin.
Yeah.
By the way, I did watch Vanderpump rules this season and they keep Showing this clip of this guy James who's an English guy on it. I don't watch that show. Okay. He's an English guy
He's a DJ. They all met being waiters and waitresses out of restaurant
He's a DJ now at and a unique restaurant pump
Yeah, sir and so they keep showing this clip from a previous reunion show where he takes back his X fiance
Oh, he takes back the night-fiance. The night?
The night?
He takes back the night.
His ex-fiance gives him back her engagement ring.
Class.
And he goes, he grabs it and he goes,
that's a Bitcoin.
What?
What?
What?
That's so lame.
That's a Bitcoin.
That's a Bitcoin.
That's a Bitcoin.
That's too.
And that's a Bitcoin. And then too. And that's a Bitcoin.
Ted Lasso, he's done it again.
Ted Lasso is a Bitcoin.
Ted Lasso is a Bitcoin.
God if Ted Lasso was a Bitcoin, would that show be as popular?
Instead, he's a soccer coach.
Ted has more.
If he were a Bitcoin instead of a soccer coach, yes, it would be 10 times more.
Well, it would make more sense because every time he's talking to the team, I'm like, what? And if it was a Bitcoin, of a soccer coach, yes, it would be 10 times more sense because every time you talk to the team I'm like what and if it was a Bitcoin
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, that a Bitcoin would be so positive. Yeah
Okay
I do with these fuck I just
Just play a listen if you want to if you want to call us and you want to ask our advice about something
or another reason that we're doing.
I don't know that we're qualified to give any advice.
So if you want to ask us advice, sure.
You can call us at Hag claims eight.
It's great.
All right.
Let's hear from Juliana.
Margolese?
Yep.
I hope so.
I'm Juliana Margolese.
Hi Paul, I'm Lauren. My name is Juliana. I just had some
fun that I thought you guys might enjoy. On the most recent episode, Paul says that he
says, hagg claims an unclaimed freight theme. But in my area, it was always unclaimed freight.
And I work overnight on my lunch. I'm listening to the episode and I thought I was in a hallway by myself and I go
Head claims a
It turns out I was not alone and I got some look so
All right, thank you
I love that thank you Julianna. Thank you for working overnight. It's whatever that may
You tell yeah, I hope you get 900 dollars. Yeah, I hope you get to grab money for the hours. And I hope you can do it.
But do you think those people were ghosts?
The people who saw her and gave her luck?
She thought she was alone.
Well, I guess she just maybe she's saving the rest of that for a different podcast she
calls into to tell them about the ghosts that she saw.
I had a-
She's broken up this story.
You think she's calling other podcasts?
Yeah.
She's like, they'll care about this part.
They'll care about this part.
Juliana, I hope that's not the case.
I had a dream two nights ago that I was at someone's house
and I put on a belt and it like flew me into a chair
and then I was like, this is a haunted belt.
And I was like trying to tell.
Oh, you're trying to tell people.
Oh, like I was like, the belt just carried me over here.
It was like haunted. This is haunted.
And then people were really busy
because they were describing the menu
of what we were about to eat.
I think I have a haunted belt.
Ha ha ha ha ha.
I think I have a haunted belt
because it keeps not fitting.
Oh, well, maybe it's a George Clooney prank belt.
It'll fit one day and then like 60 days later,
it won't fit anymore.
That's crazy. Well, that was one of those pr pranks right? Yeah, making things smaller. Taking the wardrobe
in an inch every week. I don't know. I guess that is the wardrobe and the fact is they
don't. So Julianna is so on Julianna Margus. Sounded like oh my god I love you and deep
rising or whatever the fuck it was called. Ghost ship She was in go ship. Okay. That's right
It sort of sound like chain of fools didn't it?
Yeah
But it's slightly different what is vanilla ice? What's yours exactly?
Situation of vanilla ice can on drum. Oh, what's yours by Jean Le Carr?
What is on claimed freight and hers was unclaimed
And then she said haclaims
That's change change change fools yeah, but you think it's different, but I think her is slightly different
Let's hear another one
But thank you, Julianna.
Hello, Scott Paul Lauren, piss pig J here.
Piss pig J.
I listen to you guys while working.
I work at a camp.
And it got me wondering,
do you guys camp?
Oh wow, okay.
The roughest rough event you've ever done.
Oh, thank you.
Question. Um, and I wonder how we're talking about the
life and evening.
Have a pleasant. You know what it's.
Pee me Jay as I like to call you camping has come up before camping has to
have come up before just because of just the amount of time we've spent talking
last time though you were in a tent.
That was like on the ground. How old?
20 years ago.
So you were 17.
So now you're 37.
But I just was saying because we were in like Arrowhead
and we were in the forest.
And I was a little creeped out by it at first
because it was so quiet, but then I liked it.
But I was like, I said to my, you know what,
I don't ever have to go camping, just see your where.
I never ever have to do that.
And then he was like, I don't, like I'll go with someone else. Like he was like, I have to go camping, just searware. I never ever have to do that. And then he was like, I don't, like, I'll go with someone else.
Like, he was like, I'd rather go with, I was so-and-so
because it's just like, you know, go with a friend who's excited.
I don't want to do that.
I have tried a couple times when I was young.
It's really, like, maybe I could have a little fun,
but I think I might get a little too freaked out.
More than even the discomfort.
More than the discomfort.
I think it's the sort of, like, laying in the middle of the open that I don't make it a little too freaked out. More than even the... It's the freaking, more than the discomfort. More than the discomfort. I think it's the sort of like laying in the middle
of the open that I don't like.
Well look, animals are, they've had enough with us.
Yeah, well the orcas are rising.
They're like, there's animals that are now in places
that they wouldn't be 10 years ago.
And now they're just like, openly walking around,
like who gives a shit.
Yeah, they're not afraid of anything at all. They don't give a fuck around, like who gives a shit. Yeah, there's not a single thing of anything at all.
They don't give a fuck.
They don't give a fuck, and then the ocean is now
shark's are attacking boats, orcas are attacking boats.
Cats and dogs living together.
That's a big twiggy.
Um, but yeah, I have not camped in that way
since summer camp when I was a child.
It, for me, it must have been some sort of church thing, yeah.
Like you mean in a tent?
Yeah, because I worked at a camp, but it was in a cabin.
Yeah, we had cabins and then we would go out one night
and sleep outside.
Did you ever, or?
No, I don't like that.
We had tents, we just slept to sleeping bags.
No, I don't like that.
That's like a Charlie Brown cartoon. Yeah, it's like take a 10 out to your like backyard
I always wanted to but we did not have we did not have that sort of thing what sort of thing a tent or a backyard
We did not have a tent we did have a backyard and I always wanted a tree house was really the thing
Oh, yeah, I mean tree house seemed like even today when I see it in something I don't think I've ever seen one in real life, by the way.
Like an actual in a treehouse.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I feel like Casey Wilson has one.
Yeah.
My dad built a clubhouse for us,
which was essentially in the,
we called it the alley,
but just in the side yard that didn't lead out to anything,
where he kept fire, wouldn't shit.
But he built like a clubhouse
Which we then you know the only time we would ever get together was just about figuring out who was president
Who was vice president who was treasurer and who was secretary?
I was president of my club. Yeah, we've talked. I've been the treasure
Yeah, our clubhouse was the basement and the secretary had the worst job because you never had any money
So the treasurer never had to do any although that. Although I think there were talks about like,
okay, out of our allowance.
I forgot about the treasurer part.
I was a secretary.
We did like chipping money for something.
For our allowance, let's give 10% of it every week
and then we can do something fun.
I think, absolutely.
We would do that at Chin Chin too
where it was like, and we did it a few times
where it was like, hey, put 10% of your tips in here
and we'll all go to Disneyland.
That's cool.
There were like Disneyland trips and stuff like that
Noise I was the secretary of my school student council on fifth grade
Wow
I even ran and had to make a speech should be voted secretary. I want to do it
You're basically just I like I like writing things down. I ran for you. You've been writing this entire time
I know I've been writing my everything we've been saying all my little piss pigs who want to buy a book
I ran for student council president,
was it humiliating defeat?
Oh, really?
No, it wasn't.
It was like, it wasn't, it was more like later,
I was like, why did I do that?
I know, I look back and I'm like,
that was a lot of effort.
Yeah.
I was on student council though.
It's, I got my friend elected to president.
Like I was his campaign manager.
Sure, you were like his, whatever the fuck,
I can't think of the guy's name.
Ooh, ooh.
Carville.
Carville, yes.
Was he the campaign manager for the police?
Probably for Clinton, yeah, I saw that movie.
It's kind of my stupid.
But what I noticed was everyone put so much effort
into doing these super long banners
that they would decorate with paint and puff of paint.
And your eye never would go to them
because they weren't, it was always just like,
okay, whatever, like you would eventually,
they're too long to read and eventually your eye would gloss
over on because everyone was doing them.
So all I did was, I zeroxed hundreds,
if not thousands of just,
if not millions, sheets of, if not thousands of just if not millions sheets of if not hundreds of millions if not
just sheets of paper that said Washington Lincoln and then
my friends last name. Wow. And staple those all over the
school and it was really eye popping and eye catching and
everyone was like like paid attention to it.
That's really interesting. Do you think there are any student council
presidents? I think so sarcastic. I actually wasn't. I know.
What if, but I knew it sounded like that. What if he really had achieved such heights as you
designed for him? And he was the first student council president on Mount Rushmore.
Well, he was expelled by the, we're adding a fifth head. But wait, he was expelled by the end of the year.
We'll talk about that. Wow. He PJ wanted to know if, like, if we camp. Yeah, and would you camp again?
I would, I wouldn't, we've, we've talked about actually during COVID, right before COVID, we had a whole trip planned
that you guys were supposed to come to. Right. In Montana. We were, oh oh yeah. Where we were gonna, and it was sort of like glamping,
but you have.
I forgot.
Yeah, yeah, and so we just didn't do it,
but it would still be fun to do it again.
I might do it.
I mean, I, I, somewhere between,
I think I could handle, I mean,
glamping I could definitely handle.
I would glamp, I would glamp.
Somewhere between,
some where between that and absolute like hiking,
you know, roughing it kind of thing.
If there's something in between glamping and camping,
I would do that.
That's what I'm saying.
I'm saying that.
Clamping.
Damping, because that's between C and G.
All right.
Well, so is F.
E-amping.
Famping.
Ooh, no.
That's a little.
What about tamping?
You could have come to my denim,
the fanping. The fanping. Oh, no, that's a little about 10. We're not family. We're not family. We're the family.
All right, let's hear another one.
Okay, thank you, JjP.
I am looking.
He's a Jisjig.
Jjina Jeter and Pellie.
I keep closing these.
I keep closing the window.
By the way, as of this recording, I'm just back from Philadelphia where I met many people who identify themselves as bispigs and
Now it's the normalization of it is making me uncomfortable
Coming real comfortable. Yeah, it backfire
But I also want to say to the people there were people that waited after the second show on Saturday
And I came out and I was I was burdened by a bunch of shit that I had to carry.
And so I did not stay to say hi,
but thank you all for coming to the show.
I'm sorry, I could not stop.
Aw.
Sounds fun.
He's a good guy, folks.
Ha ha ha.
I'm Scott Bauer.
I'm Scott Bauer.
I'm Scott Bauer.
This is Dylan here, and I know we all do
that Paul thinks his name should be Mr. Peacock.
I'm curious if you could rename each other.
What does Paul think Scott and Lauren's name should be?
And what does Scott think Paul and Lauren's name should be?
And what does Scott think Paul and Lauren's name should be?
I'm sorry.
You can't understand what I mean.
He's ahead of me.
Piss pig out.
Oh.
Loved it.
Yeah, what do you think our name should be?
Well, let's see, you got blue hat over here.
God.
Him.
I'm also wearing a blue hat.
Shit, that's what I'm talking about.
That's gonna be complicated for both blue hats.
She's like blue hat.
I could see Scott's name being Richard.
Richard, why Richard?
I could see you being a Richard?
Like a Richard the Third type or a poor Richard?
No, you'd be deformed.
In that scenario, I would be deformed.
You would literally be a Richard the Third type.
I'm gonna keep my name in.
And Lauren.
Uh-huh.
I could see Lauren being a Diane.
Oh, you know what I was thinking with that name yesterday.
And I was thinking of a nice name.
It was my first crush.
It was a Diane.
Wow.
And I was thinking about steak diner.
Steak Diane?
Mm-hmm.
I thought it'd be a good before and after for Will Affords
and steak Diane Keaton.
Do they fire people for one clue?
Yeah. That's one for that. They can use it if anyone hears this. Diane Keaton. Do they fire people for one clue? Yeah, I have.
That's one for that.
They can use it if anyone hears this.
It's a bad stage.
Jack is leaving the wheel of fortune.
I know.
We should do it.
We have to give us together.
They're probably gonna have Ken Jennings do it.
What if that other guy?
It's fixed a low.
The the jeopardy guy got back in the mix and was like,
you know,
or a jeopardy.
The executive roof of the jeopardy?
Let me tell you what's take Diane.
Wait, I want to give you your names. Okay, what's I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,
I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,
I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,
I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like,
I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, a mess. If it used to be served table side, I must have had.
No, I'm reading ahead.
So I was like, I better have this one I was in London.
I just saw somebody.
I saw somebody too.
The baker.
The baker is here.
Oh yeah, there's the baker.
She's picking so the she'll be in.
Okay, so your name and your name.
Okay, let me think.
If I didn't know you when I was like,
oh there's like, I had to pick this.
Oh my goodness. God. Yeah.
Okay.
You would be, she's talking to me.
You would be, hold on.
I'm working.
I'm working.
Okay, process.
Does it help if I turn around?
Process.
Yeah.
Philip.
Philip.
No, I can see you as a Phil, okay.
And your name, sir, is Sam.
Sam.
Come on, you see that?
Short for Sam.
Do you see it?
Samantha, who?
Remember that show?
Yeah, I do.
Samantha, who?
I don't feel like I could be a Sam.
You're really fighting against that, huh?
I'm not trying to fight it with that.
You're really bumping up against that.
It bumps me. It bumps me. Okay, so then I'm gonna say a fight it with it. You're really bumping up against that. It bumps me.
It bumps me.
Okay, so then I'm gonna say a new name for you.
Okay.
Your name is Dilip.
Okay.
This is good.
Fill up in Dilip.
Yeah, actually I think I can see myself with a Dilip.
And you guys always like bump into each other
when you're walking.
Ow!
Ow!
Ow!
How's it with our names?
Wait, did you give, I know you didn't know yet. Oh, how's it? How's it? How's it? How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it?
How's it? How's it? How's it? How's it? How's it? It's a pleato. It's very musical. Yeah, it's a pleato.
It's the sound of like rain falling in it.
Ios oi pleato.
Pleato.
What do you think?
Yeah, I love it.
Or bell.
Or bell and pleato.
Yeah, it's good.
And then what would your name be?
Oh, I have to give myself a name.
That was part of the deal.
That was part of the deal.
Okay, I made a part of the deal.
I like to make deals.
Dr. Poo. So you've gone to medical school? Yes, in this Dr. Pornwater?
Dr. Pimple Popper.
Ew, okay, can we go?
Do you think there's someone, a doctor named Dr. Pimple Popper?
Who's like, not the mean Dr. Pimple Popper?
I'm like, Sue, that's my actual name.
And not a doctor either.
The first name is Dr. Pimple Popper.
Yes. Dr. Pimple Popper. Who's like, not the lead. Dr. Pimple Popper, like, that's my actual name. And not a doctor either.
The first name is Dr.
Yes.
I work at the bank,
count and pennies,
and watching people put them in roles.
All right, we do have to go.
We do, so remember,
Heig claims eight,
if you would like to send us a three-tron.
Send us, we'll do that on the next episode.
Send us Staked Ian, by the way. If you'd like to send us Staked Iacher. Send us a poll too. We'll do that on the next episode. Send us steak dianne, by the way.
If you'd like to send us steak dianne in dry ice, do so.
Yeah.
And I'd like to sit at home.
Well, I usually can serve table side cooked table.
Usually it gets cooked table side.
And so I probably had it.
If you'd like to send us a table, go ahead.
Yeah, a symbol.
A symbol.
What is it?
What is it?
What is it?
What is it? And so it? What is it?
And...
But listen, if you want to send us a feature, write to us at
3DMUSAGmail.com and send us a fun game like a game you and
your dumb friends play.
And then Lauren is threatening to put this very underwhelming
video of the fish up on the 3DMUSA account.
It'll be out.
That's where people can find it.
3D in the US.
It'll be up there.
I want to clarify, the listeners not dumb.
It's their friends who are dumb.
Yes.
Yes.
I want to say I have a show coming up on August 4th at Dynasty typewriter.
Noise.
It's an improv show and I'm, it's going to be a fun big fun time.
How do you know it's fun if it's an improv?
It's a fun thing.
Because I know that I'm going to put together a group that's stupendous and every time it's... But it might be terrible. Every time it's really fun. How do you know it's fun if it's too big? Funnily fun? Because I know that I'm going to put together a group that's stupendous.
But it might be terrible.
But it might be terrible.
Every time it's really fun, this time it'll be even more fun because this is going to
be more people.
It's going to be really fun.
Whoa.
I want to tell you something.
Yeah.
Sunday, July 9th.
Where are we in history right now?
Where before that?
Where before that?
Variah Topia.
No, we're into July.
At this point?
No.
Oh, then I don't have a number of the nights.
I might show.
You can still announce it.
Oh, it's fine.
It's August 4th.
Save the date.
It's August 4th.
July 9th, Lodrum 7PM, Variatopia, it's going to be great.
We have great guests, fun lineup.
Don't miss it.
And then August 26th, Portland,
we're at the Aladdin theater. That show has been selling well,
and I have not done any promo for it. Amazing.
So get those tickets. What's the Aladdin theater?
It's a wonderful theater in Portland. Do you have to like rub anything to get in there?
Yeah. Yeah. It's a lamp. Okay.
That's good. The pause was a little weird. Yes.
No, you have to go to this old curiosity shop.
On one of the shelves there is an ancient mystic lamp,
you rub it and then there's a bouncer that says,
what's the password?
And then the genie tells you the password.
Well, there's a password.
You get nervous and then the bouncer's like,
I'm fucking with you.
And then he lets you in.
And then the genie shows you to your seat.
Oh, nice.
So he's kind of doing a lot though,
because every single person, yes.
Okay, so we take a while to get in.
Yes, so plan accordingly.
Oh, me hours early.
And then if you wanna hear, look, three visiting on the twos,
every Tuesday we're releasing old episodes.
That's right.
In the feed.
And then if you wanna hear at free episodes,
go to CBB World or Stitcher Premium.
And that's gonna do it for this episode.
Love it.
Or get the hose again.
Yeah.
Come on.
I'm gonna die.
Hear no!