Threedom - Threevisiting: Do You Even Know Gyms?

Episode Date: June 27, 2023

Threevisiting on the Tues: Scott, Paul and Lauren discuss personal trainers, changing your name and play One-Word Impressions. Follow us on social media @threedomusa. Send Threetures and emails to thr...eedomusa@gmail.com. Leave us a voicemail at 424-252-4678 (HAG-CLAIMS-8).

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 Freedom Me Did you say help me? Welcome back to three dumb we didn't introduce ourselves last episode But I'm to three dumb we didn't introduce ourselves last episode but I'm about my friends and my friend Paul and I'm your band Lauren. No I didn't say best I said my friends. Oh okay. Let it be known. No one here is my best friend. No we talked about your best friend. We know about your best friends. We heard it
Starting point is 00:00:39 and we're living up to time. I'm same with yours, your wives. What? What? She's pretty cool. You'd like her. She's pretty cool. You'd like her. You'd like her.
Starting point is 00:00:51 We have parties too. Seriously. So we were just talking a little bit before we started. We, uh, yeah, we were talking about a... My name is Paul. Yeah. We said that. If you don't know, and it's about 20 million, that my name is Lauren.
Starting point is 00:01:04 He's Paul and he's Scott. Then we can't help you. Can't talk flock out of the country. Give the fuck out of the country. I cannot help you. We were talking before the show. Look back to Africa. What?
Starting point is 00:01:17 What? Look, ultimately, that's where we're all from. Oh, no. Now you're going to be that person. You can say that to anyone. And it's not offensive. Go ahead. It's never.
Starting point is 00:01:28 It's go back to Africa. This is where I. This is where I tap out. We were talking before the show because Shavin over here mentions that he has a personal trainer over here. And I think the only I think the only reason anyone ever says that is because they want you. She has over here. And I think the only- She has over here. I think the only reason anyone ever says that is because they want you to comment on their body.
Starting point is 00:01:48 So Kevin, very nice body. I think he doesn't want that. And you said we're going to spank. You can grab it. I think we can put on his body, okay? It's canceled. I think Kevin is canceled. All of your, no, all of your,
Starting point is 00:01:59 Kevin's canceled. Your communication with Kevin? I can't talk to Kevin anymore. Apparently not, you can't handle it. One, go talk to Kevin because you can't handle what's happening to leave him alone. He doesn't want to suck your bones. Just give him a break.
Starting point is 00:02:15 He's gonna wake up in his bed in the morning. Wondering why he is still thinking about you. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, to be there. You're gonna, like I like to do someone waiting for me. And then like, if I don't show up there disappointed or something, it's like, it puts a stake in exactly what. I want a candle in a window. Yeah. And I want, what if by land? Yeah. That trainers waiting for me to come by.
Starting point is 00:02:57 But I was saying that my, because I like to do classes because I am charged if I don't go. So it feels like, I'm only, I am losing time. But you're not letting anyone down other than yourself, which if you don't go. So it feels like I'm only, I am losing time. But you're not letting anyone down other than yourself, which if you don't work out, you're already letting yourself down. Yeah, but money matters to me.
Starting point is 00:03:10 And so really bothers me if I lose 20 bucks. So I signed up for something and didn't do it. Can I ask you another question? What if your money got mad at you because you wasted it? Exactly. What, would you give me $20 just for no reason? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:22 Okay. I wonder why the fuck you needed it. I don't need it. Would you just give it to me? I don't want to. Will you though? No. See?
Starting point is 00:03:32 I actually think that's a lot about you. That says a lot about you. The other day I went to a CBS and I checked out at the self check out and I got 40 bucks back on cash back and then I left and I went to the manicure place across the street and halfway through that I realized I forgot my cash in the soul mat and then I called CVS and I said I'm sure it's gone but I would you check and they did and it was there and it was well held it for me. That's very nice. Yeah and I came back a good hour later and that's not there is goodness in this world. Or that's the most
Starting point is 00:04:08 unpopular. I just thought nobody used it probably because I'm like, right. Yeah. Someone would have either taken it or given it to them. And it's like, yeah, no one's going to see $40 in there and go. I'll just leave that there. But I also wonder if it came out of like a weird hole that's like not noticed if you don't get cash back because I didn't remember to take it. It didn't like just pop out of the machine. It might have been a bit of a weird hole or a weird slot. So anyways, what about you had a personal trainer? Okay, so I had a personal trainer. I got a story of machines. Traveling internationally, when they started using more machines to scan
Starting point is 00:04:41 passports and everything, a couple times I almost left my passport in the machine. Oh, yeah. Like walked away from it and somebody else said, sir, sir, sir, you left your passport in here. I had a thing fucking terrifying. I had a period of time, you know, when I was traveling a lot. I don't know, maybe it was on tour or whatever. Maybe I did it with you guys.
Starting point is 00:04:59 I can't remember, but oh, yeah, we did it where I would. Yeah, remember when we all did it. And where I was. Where I would yeah, we're we're we all did it Now where I'm ferd was where I would you watch him my I did this several times in a short period of time where I my suitcase would go through the x-ray I would go through the X-ray thing and then I would lay at the rack on the Charlie Brown French moving and then I would leave the suitcase there. I'd surely go French moving.
Starting point is 00:05:28 I would leave the suitcase there and then I would go off, I would go to my gate and I would suddenly go, and I would like sit down then I would go shopping and then I'd go, oh my God, I left my suitcase somewhere and I would go back to where I was sitting down and go someone stole my suitcase and then I'd call security and I'd be like, my suitcase is gone.
Starting point is 00:05:46 You did this more than once. I did it like several times in a short period. Well, the first time I called the security and all that and then finally I went back to the officer. That's right, it was just sitting there. Yeah, I had looked dumb. But no, it happened several times. We're suddenly like 20 minutes later, I'm like,
Starting point is 00:06:01 where's my suitcase? And then I would have to go back and it would just be sitting there with the thing. That's a bad feeling. It's terrible. So I had a personal trainer for a while. In the mouth of madness. It's madness.
Starting point is 00:06:17 It's madness. It's just pure madness. It's simply madness. It's simply madness. So, something madness. So I had this guy, I don't wanna say his name. I don mad mad. I'm so... Something mad, dude. So I had this guy, I don't wanna say his name. I don't wanna say his name, but this is like... But why was it though, Bart?
Starting point is 00:06:31 This is your Billy Blitz. This is the year 2000. For fuck's sake. In the year 2000. So I had a person. And you Richter. It was Andy Richter. It was Andy Richter. It was Andy Richter.
Starting point is 00:06:46 It's a clue you were giving us. So I was around 2000. I went to a gym and they convinced me to get a personal trainer because he worked at the police. He worked at the gym. And so it was a nice situation for a while because he worked at the gym. It was a nice situation. I was there.
Starting point is 00:07:03 He was there. He trained me. I was fine. He was there. He trained me. I was fine. He was good. It all worked out. I paid him money. He gave me a service for the money. I liked it.
Starting point is 00:07:11 I liked it. We were happy. But then, I guess he fell off so fast. He was like, I was butter. There's nothing better than interrupting a story and getting it going. And then what? He's literally about to say, like, what?
Starting point is 00:07:26 And then what? And then what? Can you finish? Can you finish? Can you finish? So then I guess he got fired from the gym, but he still wanted to train me, and I was used to him, so he was like,
Starting point is 00:07:40 but now he's damaged goods. Well, no, but he couldn't come into the gym that I belong to. That I belong. Why? Because he was fired from it. So why? I don't know. What did he do?
Starting point is 00:07:50 He never said. He never said. I'll bet he never did. But he still wanted to train me, but he was like, he made somebody fat. Well, he was like, I'll give you a promise. Oh, fuck this. I've had it. You said this we'd eat up time. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! This fucking socks. I did get scared though like I didn't like it
Starting point is 00:08:35 Do you want to hear it? I don't even feel like talking anymore You have to because we got another 40 minutes It's to them just do to them. I'm too dumb. It is you want to be out? I'm out Can I be Scott? No, you have to be yourself and you have to be him and you do to them. Fine, to them it is. Do to them. You want to be out? I'm out. Can I be Scott? No, you have to be yourself and you have to be him and you do to them. You want to do to them? Oh, it's too much. So I hate Scott.
Starting point is 00:08:55 I hate Scott. I'm here. So I am not here. I'm listening to you. I would never say such a word. Well, just come back, okay? Tune into the work. Paul can tell by the way.
Starting point is 00:09:10 And I just talked shit about you. It's a mess. It's a bad for me. We need you. We need you, honey. You need to tell a story about a guy who's going to find it. I don't want to help you. No!
Starting point is 00:09:21 I'm not going to. Fuck you. Just tell us what happened with your trainer. We'll be good. What did he do to you? How would he do? Do you like it? Okay.
Starting point is 00:09:36 So, so then what? He said he would give me a discount. So he started training me at his house. How much? I'm curious. Well, you know how to talk to Sess. You know how he has to split it with the gym when you know him. Do you know gyms?
Starting point is 00:09:51 Oh, I thought he got fired. He went to the house. Do you even know gyms? He's, the arrangement previous was that he would split it with the gym. Forget it. Forget it. It's a check.
Starting point is 00:10:02 I can't listen to a story while. Say I pay $80 for a session when he works with a gem. You pay $80 for a session with a book. He gets 40 or he gets 60 or whatever and the gym gets a cut. Sure. So now that the gym gets a width beat. So now that he's not working with the gym, he says, stay on with me and I'll let you have do it for 60.
Starting point is 00:10:23 Did he say, did he say, couldai on. He's a Kastai on. So I think this is a good arrangement because it's cheaper. It's the same guy that is cheaper but he doesn't have all the equipment so I have to go to his house or apartment. It was like a bungalow. Okay. That he also was all over the place. It was a bungalow. Yeah. That he also, it's all over the place. It was a bungalow. It was a bungalow. It was a tree house. And the other guy and the other bungalow wanted to be a singer and a band. And this is the year 2000.
Starting point is 00:10:51 He looks exactly like Scott Wyland. And I was like, well, what's your style? What's your band style? He's like, well, we're sort of like his T.P. And I was just like, yeah, no kidding. Yeah. So down to the looks. So I go over, I would go over to his house and he would do the stuff with me,
Starting point is 00:11:07 right? So then, but here's the other wrinkle. He keeps wanting advances. He keeps saying, like, can you can you give it to me? Like, can you give me the next six months? Geez. That's a lot. Yeah, yeah. And then what? How often were you going to his house? It's not that far. No, but how often? How often? Yeah, it's probably four days a week, five days. That's a six months advance on four days a week. Yeah, yeah. What's a lot?
Starting point is 00:11:30 And he kept like, and then he'd go, he'd go, you know, I just needed for the three months. And then it kept, it was like I was paying a year in advance at one point, I think. And so then it's like a commitment to yourself. Yeah, the guy was a mess. So then September 11th, 2001 happens. You guys remember this? Are you gonna joke about this? No, I remember seeing people on rooftops cheer and celebrate.
Starting point is 00:11:55 I remember when the statue and the date... Oh, real thing that happened. I remember the statue of a leader was crying. She cried, she lowered it to her. It caused a lot of address. She did too. That remember the set your leader was crying. She cried, she lowered her torch. It's too long. It's too long. She did too long. That's how she put out the fire.
Starting point is 00:12:09 Fire was put out by the set your leader. It's too late. It's too late. So I think we were working, working out the next day. I think it was the next day or was the day after that. My birthday. And we, that's right. And I went over to his bungalow.
Starting point is 00:12:26 We'll figure out where you were on that. I was like, all right, let's, like, what do we do? And he goes, come inside, come inside. I want to show you something. Is this what he sounded like? Yeah, he sounded like my older roommate. Come here, I want to show you something. But he was scared.
Starting point is 00:12:41 I was scared. He was like, come inside. And he opens a catastute. Yeah, and just keep going. He's like, go beside. And he opens a couch suit. Yeah, just keep going. He has me sit down on the floor and he opens up the Torah. Oh, boy. And he's, by the way, he's an African-American gentleman from South America somewhere. And he says, look at this, look at this. Check out. He says, look at this, look at this. Check out, uh, and it was a, it was a, it was a verse, get an illustrated Torah, like sex effect, which was that of
Starting point is 00:13:14 that roof playboy inside. And he shows me a certain verse from the Torah that says, something to the effect of and God will rain down his punishment on the wicked. And he, and you know how in the Hebrew there's dots above the, you know, in the Hebrew alphabet, there's like the dots above the letters. And he says, count these dots, count these dots. And so I count, and I'm like, one, two, three, four, five, nine. He's like, now read this verse, read this verse. And it's something else about like God's punishment. And see how he goes, count the dots, count the dots.
Starting point is 00:13:50 I count one, two, 11. He's like, wow. And then he just read to me from the Torah for an hour. And you paid for that. And he charged me for it. And you were ripped when you you paid for that. And he charged me for it. But you were ripped when you walked out of that. And that was the last, and I was like, fuck this.
Starting point is 00:14:11 I'm not, and I just never called him ever again. And he owed me thousands and thousands of dollars in training sessions. I was so weirded out by it. You had paid him all the money. Yeah, because I had paid him in advance for like a year. It's a mess. And then I saw this is a mess. There's no other out by it. You had paid him all the money. Yeah, because I had paid him in advance for like a year. It's a mess. And then I saw this is a mess. There's no other way around it. And then I never saw him again, except for one time.
Starting point is 00:14:31 I saw him at M bar. One time. I saw him at M bar on an open mic night. He wandered in and I was sitting at the bar and he wandered in. He's like, hey, you can give me a big hug. I'm like, hey man. And he's like, hey, can give me a big hug. I'm like, hey, man. And he's like, anyone can do this?
Starting point is 00:14:49 And I was like, yeah, anyone, like anyone, you just sign up and you go up and he's like, I'm signing up. And then he, Quick question, does anyone bring the tour up? No, he went up and then he, for five minutes, talked about strange conspiracy theories with no jokes. And everyone was laughing at him because he was so weird and uncomfortable. And he got off stage and came over and he said, they were all laughing.
Starting point is 00:15:12 I said, dude, they were laughing at you. You did? Yeah. Because I was so mad about the money and the Torah. And I have not seen him since. Wow. Could be alive. Could be dead. So Bill will assume he disappeared into not seen him since. Wow. Could be alive. Could be dead.
Starting point is 00:15:26 So, Billy assumed he disappeared into a puff of snow. Yeah, he might have. Maybe he would be really good at that. I even took him to the Lion King. I took him and his daughter to see the Lion King at the Pan Tages, because I was so fond of him. And he charged you for that as well. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:41 Wow. Today the work I will be an entertainment workout. Where you sit down and watch puppets. You work out of the eyes. Sit down and watch puppets. Wait, the Broadway Lanking? Yeah, the Broadway Lanking. Oh, I got the movie. You took it to see.
Starting point is 00:15:54 No, I took it to see Jesus. I took it to see Jesus. No, I took it to see Jesus. I took it to see Jesus. I took it to see Jesus. Wow. Because I was like, hey, your daughter would like this, because she had his daughter occasionally.
Starting point is 00:16:02 And she wasn't married to the woman. Sometimes a little kid. So betrayed. So betrayed. That she wasn't married to her. So I'm a little kid. Ah, so betrayed. So betrayed. That's why you're not ripped. That's, look at my body now. Does it explain it? A lot of people have that same experience with trainers,
Starting point is 00:16:14 so I get it. Yeah, that was so typical. So. Oh. My only experience with trainers was, we had a guy come to our house that a friend of ours had recommended. And I have a problem with that sort of thing because I'm not a good student.
Starting point is 00:16:31 I'm an anxious student. And I'm in a hurry to know how to do the thing already. And I don't, I get very self-conscious and irritated when I can't do it right away. And so somebody's giving me the instruction. It drives me crazy. It's like I like to learn things all by myself. I can be like that too. You know, but the guy also,
Starting point is 00:16:52 he was a frustrated actor and frustrated. It's so frustrated that he brought it up all the time. He was very, he was very embittered, but he was also like cracking jokes all the time. Like what kind of thing would he say about career? That he doesn't know why these other guys are getting auditions that he's not getting. He's as good as these people. How do you ever see him in anything?
Starting point is 00:17:14 No. Yeah. Do you ever see him act? No. Then my wife hired a trainer years later, a woman, same kind of thing. The trainer was a woman. Her name was Dr. Woman. Impossible.
Starting point is 00:17:31 And Dr. Woman was also a frustrated woman out there. Yeah, for sure. Dr. Woman was also a frustrated actor. And so gradually, those sessions devolved into like my wife having to sort of take care of her right on her journey That's it. I just wanted all business You know what I mean? I just like the same thing with a haircut What else were we talking about on a pretty good shot where it's I flipped the kid a 57 piece on my way can I just tell you I googled Dr. Woman
Starting point is 00:18:05 and the main thing that came up? She goes around it. No, and the main thing that came up was Dr. Quinn-Modest and Woman. I should hope so. But then the people also ask, what is a female doctor called? Oh, doctorous.
Starting point is 00:18:18 What do they do with the lady doctor? What do they do at the lady doctor? What is the opposite thing? What do they do at the lady doctor? What is the opposite? Do you have a lady doctor? Here's another one. What is the opposite gender of doctor? People ask that. Well, I get, okay, what jobs are there where there's a female and a male nominclature? Well, executor. Well, actor and actress. Exactly, exactly. And we're getting rid of actress.
Starting point is 00:18:49 I think it's slowly going away. And I would not be asked. Except for awards. That's right. But I do think that's true. But what else is there? Is there a mayor? I guess well, we've changed everything to male person.
Starting point is 00:19:01 Light attendant was stewardess. That's right. Missus andwardess. That's right. Missus and Missu. Oh, right. Yeah. Although now it's just a Missus, right? I don't know. Are men called Missusus?
Starting point is 00:19:15 Or are they? You're asking me the same question to Jennifer Waysa. But wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's go. If you're a man, I am. Then prove it. Oh, I'll massage you all right. I I am then prove it. Oh, I'll massage you all right. I'm a son of a bitch.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Maybe they're just massage therapists now. Is it cool? Feminine terms such as actress, Usherette and comedian. Usherette. I'm marked with the mask with respect to the masculine actor, Usher, comedian, both formally and in the sense that only the masculine form can be used generically, just to grab a mixed gender group. Why do that start with and with only a few jobs?
Starting point is 00:19:48 Because we live in a fucked up society where man rule all women getting nothing. Why can't women be grooms? I want to be a groom. Would you put out a novelty record? That's the only job I want. A novelty record. This is just using it. I have fought all my life to be the first woman groom.
Starting point is 00:20:14 Let it be, let it be. Oh, what? And he just starts the let it be after 10 seconds. Let it be. Let it be. Let me be. Let me be. Let me be. All right, we need to take a break. We'll be right back.
Starting point is 00:20:34 Bye. When I fire myself and I'm a trouble. Mother Mary comes to me. Speaking words of wisdom. Let it be. What was John Lennon's last hit? The one time he got shot. Oh shit. That was for my. The one time he got shot. Oh shit.
Starting point is 00:21:06 That was for my your Santa. Your classic welcome back. Let it be let it. Hey, before we go any further, let it be let it be. Get off your phone. I'm allowed to glance at the object. The object of your phone.
Starting point is 00:21:23 Yes. Connect with us, Lauren. I am. Or are you only on during the show when I'm telling a story? Is that it? I'm telling you something. You'll be connected with you.
Starting point is 00:21:33 You were singing let it be. I was at you. You're kidding me. That's it. That is it. And if you want more for me, you guys do a little more in your hands. It's a give and take. It is a give and take. It's a give and more in your hands. It's a give and take it. It's a give and take.
Starting point is 00:21:45 It's a give and take my friends. It's a give and take. I'm sorry. I glanced. Well, we're on a break. The break turned into being back on the show. And you were so the neck. I'm like the next so bad. You're saying this like that was the only time you've ever been on your phone during the show. Like, oh, it's so excusable. We were on a break.
Starting point is 00:22:03 It did not. It did not. It did. It did. It is remarkable when I who will be because sometimes I'll bust in on comedy bang bang. Sure. If I get here and I see that you're recording, I'll come in later. I'll some class of jarls. Of course. And there's a certain type of person, a certain character of person who will be on their phone when they are not talking. Yes, I don't do that during your drop. There's very, I don't think, to be fair, because I don't know the truth about this track. I have no idea what's going on. Here I can say what? And you're forced to tell me.
Starting point is 00:22:34 What? What happened? All right, Lauren, bring something to the table. What do you got? All right. Oh, is this our new segment? Yeah, bring something to the table. Bring something to the table. What do you got? All right. Oh, is this our new segment? Yeah, bring something to the table. Bring something to the table.
Starting point is 00:22:46 What do you got? We'll start with Lauren. Just anything. Yeah, what do you got? Uh, trying to name it, what I want to share. What happened to you this week? I haven't seen you. Oh, I got something.
Starting point is 00:22:57 I got something. This is what I was. Lauren, just to be honest. I'm not saying instead of Lauren, I'm saying, I did you tell him. I'm not saying, I did you tell him. That would let him to be. I'm debating because I have more I'm saying the digital. I'm gonna say that would let them to me. I'm debating because I have a, I have a juicy story.
Starting point is 00:23:10 No, no, it's not juicy. Debate me come here. I'm gonna vaguely talk about this thing and then see if I can get away with not saying it. It's not private, but I don't feel like telling you it's not private, but it is dirty. Yeah, it's second wrong. The thing is, okay, so I'm basically doing something, but, no, but my thing is,
Starting point is 00:23:35 what happens a lot in my life is that I will tell people, I'm doing this thing right now. Fucking. For example, like working out or something. Okay. And then I feel like I talk about it too much. Like if I get a new thing that I'm doing, then I talk about it too much. And then like it becomes like, I need to stop talking about that. I should just do the thing like because I have other front like Stephanie Allen, for example, I feel like, we'll just like complete something and then say, Hey, I just did this. And I'll
Starting point is 00:24:04 go, Whoa, I don't't know you were doing that. Like I ran a marathon. Sure. For example, I've never talked about it for the six months of training. But for me, if I was just going to run a marathon, you'd be like, hey guys, I'm thinking of running a marathon. Yeah, for a year I'd say that. I decided to start running a marathon.
Starting point is 00:24:17 I started training for the marathon. Everyone's just like, shut the fuck up, Lauren. I'm free, so. Yeah. So I have a thing like that right now, but I'm like, I want to just. You want to just bust it on surprises? Yeah, kind of, but also, I'm like, I don't want it to become like something where everyone's always going, how's that going?
Starting point is 00:24:34 Right. I'd rather just do the thing. I see. Now, I can, I will tell you about it later, but I don't want, like, I'll tell you about it today. I just don't want to say it on Mike because I'm like, I tend to do it. I tend to do it. I don't want them to follow my journey with this thing. And if you don't do it, which is, look,
Starting point is 00:24:49 the chances are probably high, you're never gonna end up doing it. Well, what it is is I am gonna do it because I am, because it's happening, but, and at some point I'm probably, well, it's just, but I have to say, the other night, I saw world horses and I didn't bring it up. And I was like, look at me.
Starting point is 00:25:06 I didn't even bring that. It would be my thing that I would be talking about because it was annoying. I had this thing happen with it. There was a whole story. Whatever. You're not killing yourself, are you? There's a annoying and it's what they have.
Starting point is 00:25:19 No, it's just, it's not even a real. This is exciting. It's something that's happening. And that's what's up is that it's not exciting and that it's boring And so I also know that I would be saying here's my boring story and telling it over and over and over And I actually only told it to three people which three let's count them down Mike Number three my therapist Number two my therapist more than three
Starting point is 00:25:41 Um, and number one my friend Dan and my friend Mary. But those are the only people that I've mentioned it to. Number four, Mary, five. And your mom, five mom. And who have they told countless people each get five? Does your mom ask about me? Yeah. My mom, uh, say hello to your mother for me.
Starting point is 00:25:59 She asks about you guys and how you're doing. I don't know. I'm coming from. I don't know. I call her on the phone after I'm driving home from podcasts and stuff. Do you feel this way after you do a podcast, you need to talk more? No. No.
Starting point is 00:26:13 I am especially because I totally get that. But for me, especially because we tend to do two episodes at a time, I feel like I swam laps by the time I'm spent. Yeah, I usually do separate tariff of this. Spent, and then I get home, and then I'm reconnecting with Janie. And she. How's it feel now? Bad.
Starting point is 00:26:37 From the outside. I mean, honestly, it feels kind of hot. Fucking. Yeah, keep talking. You know what? Fucking feels good. I think I liked it. Yeah. Yeah, fucking feels good. I think I liked it. You've even noticed you do fucking feels good.
Starting point is 00:26:49 You have big faces on this show. You're an ex-ferroversial. You're an ex-fiverroversial. You're an ex-fiverroversial. You're an ex-fiverroversial. You're an ex-fiverroversial. You'll want to reconnect. And it's sort of like, on the one hand, it's great for her to talk and me not to have
Starting point is 00:27:02 to talk. But then sometimes it's also like, I'm done with talking for a while. Like hearing or doing that. Yeah, I know. I feel like. But you can't do that. You can't be like. Oh, yeah, I can.
Starting point is 00:27:14 I'm sure you punished your silence. Well, you're very withholding. What was the thing you were thinking of that happened last year? Yeah, what happened to you? Do you remember, this was a couple episodes ago, I told you guys what I thought my name should be. Oh, yeah, it was like Willikers biscuit. It was not Willikers or Bumblebee Bitskitt Dicks.
Starting point is 00:27:37 It was Dennis J. Peacock. Thank you. All right. But you guys... Digly changed? No, I'm not gonna go. Like at 50. You're not Dennis J. Peacock. I'm Dennis J. Peacock. But you guys No Like at 50 you're not done as stupid. I'm done. I'm gonna say You're insane. What a fucking nightmare that would be my decided to change my name
Starting point is 00:28:01 You're so insane, but you guys did not we talked about how we feel about our names But you guys did not provide what you think your name if you looked at a picture of yourself a picture that you feel like a professional picture That we got hot hot picture We look at pictures. They're a picture of Scott. We can only like you're like going Google and pick the best. No, I think it's got to be the name that you feel like if you If what name when you look at yourself, what do you think is the name that most perfectly describes you? That goes with how you look. Let's see, I got big nose. You know what that means. Yeah, I smell shit easier.
Starting point is 00:28:38 I honestly do when I come home and God forbid, if one of our little ones has shit somewhere out. I can tell immediately. And cool up, you know, does not have the nose I have. I'm not saying because of her race. I'm saying because I have a big. I can't really smell as much as I can.
Starting point is 00:28:58 And I feel I will notice it. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. And immediately. notice it. My mom has a thing to where she can tell like someone. I'll just be sitting there at a computer sometimes. I'm like, shit in my whole. Somebody stop. There's a dot of mold or something.
Starting point is 00:29:10 It's like you just tell like something is wrong. Yeah, it's a real Hannibal. No, I'll just be sitting there sometimes. And suddenly, it's like my shit sense starts tingling. It's just because like I'll go, there's a shit crime happening. It's so what's your name? What's your name supposed to be? I don't know. I don't know if I was looking at a picture of myself.
Starting point is 00:29:30 I would look at a picture. I want you to, but on the picture of yourself that you like, I'm gonna say this is this is a little homework assignment for you guys. I have mine. Oh, what's yours? Say homework. I actually think I don't know why it's never come to you for it's not a name that I particularly interested in. I would say my name should be...
Starting point is 00:29:55 I'm gonna get small again. I can't think of a last name. Okay. The first name I'm going with is Greta. Greta. Also, it sounded horrible coming out. On such a stretch. Yeah, but I looked at a picture when I saw it. It makes sense. Greta. Or like, or like, Goody.
Starting point is 00:30:14 Like, B. Jane. Jane. Jean. Jane. Not Jane. No, not right for me.
Starting point is 00:30:23 Jane. Hey, Jane. Jane, for me Jane Hey Jane Jane get me off of this crazy thing Jane can you get My mother on the phone, but I think I can name yourself is Impossible can I tell you that I I can't okay? So when I wait wait, why is it impossible? I did it. It's like a set I don't think your name is Dennis. I think if you look peacock, if you...
Starting point is 00:30:49 I'm gonna give you a name. That's bad. I don't like this. That's better. No, it's worse. It's probably worse. So when I... If you look at this, if you did not know me,
Starting point is 00:30:58 you saw this guy. Okay, that picture is overwhelming. This is my... Oh, yeah. You have a heart. You have a heart. This is my Twitter face. I'm pulling a face have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, you have a, Pancake? Yeah. I think like the last name, Pancake. And that is his real name.
Starting point is 00:31:25 Yeah. That's like, I would not expect it to be real. Right. But it's a, that's like a fun last name. It's very fun. Mr. Pancake. Yeah. I'm Mr. Pancake.
Starting point is 00:31:36 That's just like, that's never occurred to me before. Like someone that like the doctor's like, Mr. Pancake. Yeah. It's really fun. Do you think people who normally say,. whatever their surname is choose to say Sam to him? Like Sam, are you like at a doctor's office? Just to avoid having to say Panning.
Starting point is 00:31:54 There's a guy named something macaroni. Sam with Sam macaroni actually. He's a good director. I think it's really. Yeah. Macaroni, Mr. Macaroni. And then there's people and then like every carriage I come up with has a noun for last name, pretty much.
Starting point is 00:32:08 I think it's really fun. I went to college. I went, you know, yeah, I'm educated. You didn't graduate though. Oh! I did graduate from the college I went to. I completed it. I didn't graduate from the college,
Starting point is 00:32:23 I didn't go to. Oh yeah, I mean either, so I it. I didn't graduate from the college, I didn't go to. Oh yeah, I mean either, so I'm like you guys. Hi, all. So I thought it would be funny to tell everyone that I had a nickname that I didn't have. Oh wow. So I was like, you can call me Jackson. That's so dope.
Starting point is 00:32:39 So, and so. Oh, come on. I was like, come on. I was like, come on some slacks. This is like a 40s, like, hey Jackson. It's very cute. But it's like, you can call me Jackson. That's my nickname.
Starting point is 00:32:50 And roughly all of the administrators and teachers and 50% of the students didn't believe me. But then the other 50% of the students all did call me that for years. And so there are still people who call me Jackson. Okay. Wow. Why did you want Jackson? Cause it was a 40, that's a great. Cause it was like a 40s like slangy type of thing. How long I still occasionally, I'll maybe see someone who's like, Hey, Jackson, how long went after you told people that? Yeah. How long did it take for you to
Starting point is 00:33:22 to naturally respond to that? I would respond. No, I liked it. Like right? No, but I mean, right away, if you were right away, I was turned to someone. Sure. You said, Hey Jackson, you wouldn't. I knew it was him. I would respond. You trained yourself from your core. It wasn't as much of a joke as the joke part of it was me saying, like, Ha, Ha, I've done. This is my nickname already, but I still thought it was a good nickname.
Starting point is 00:33:44 So I still. Yeah. This one. but I still thought it was a good nickname. So I still, so I still was, I like being called it. I don't get it. Well, then my teacher sat me down and was like, my whole school, no one believes. Well, my whole school thing was like, you're my chair around members. I'm trying to figure out how to manage me.
Starting point is 00:34:01 And so they basically were sat me down to try to get me to admit it wasn't my real name or whatever. Oh my god. I'm sorry, in intervention. Honestly, I would totally do that too, because when someone does something like that, like that can be so crazy. And when you know they're lying
Starting point is 00:34:17 and you're like, I just gotta get to the bottom of this. Like tell me the fucking thing. You know, it wasn't done that way. You know what it was lying and they will not admit that they're lying. Even if it's a dumb thing, it is a mad. It was even more of a dumb thing. It wasn't done that way.
Starting point is 00:34:29 It was, tell me. It was done with the sense of like, you know, you're going to be moving on to, because it's acting so cool. Do they think you were like, you're going to be moving on to your professional career. And so, you know, you really have to think about like what your name professionally is going to be. And so there can't be to think about what your name professionally is going to be. And so there can't be a lot of confusion about it. And so have you thought about this because I hear some people call you Scott, some people
Starting point is 00:34:52 call you Jackson. It's like, yeah, that's really interesting. But there was a period of time where I was like, that's really interesting. That's how I dealt with all of that because I was like, that's really interesting point. Look at the time. But there was a time where I was kind of like, should that be on my head shots? Cause-
Starting point is 00:35:10 Just gonna take Jackson quotes? Well, I also- I also the Aquaman part of it was like- Just Jackson. No, no, for a minute I was like Jackson Aquaman, but that was like Aquaman is terrible. Please welcome your Jackson. Here's what's making me laugh about this. It's so vulnerable
Starting point is 00:35:27 for you to go call me Jackson. Not done in a vulnerable manner by the way. It's a bold gambit. It was me, it was me like doing it as a like, it was almost like the woman saying she's pregnant. Okay, so it's really done. It was basically like, so it's lying to you and if you call me on it. But then I thought about Arnold Schwarzenegger and I was like, well, he's got a terrible name. He's got a terrible name. I was thinking about him. I was thinking about him all the time. But now when you hear Schwarzenegger, no one else has that name. So it's like, oh, it's a good name for him because he made his mark.
Starting point is 00:36:07 So that's why I was like, you know what? Ackerman is fine, even though I'm not really like incredibly fond of it. No one else has it. And so that's also why during the Bang Bang TV show, like I would make fun of it with the kairons and all that kind of stuff. Just to try to get into the punch. Take it back. Yeah, yeah, they can make fun of you, but you make fun of yourself first. Right. You got it. Boy, my ugly. Um, I was just a non-sequitur.
Starting point is 00:36:32 I'm just reminding you just you have moved on to a job. Don't worry, I know. Um, so worries. It was about nicknames, Paul. You named the punch carol. Oh, it's so very. Was it about nicknames, Paul? You named him the punch carol. Well, Schwartz, oh. Here's, he was in twins. Is that where you're gonna ask? Yeah, was he even got in twins? No, they're tall ones. They're tall ones.
Starting point is 00:36:55 They don't have to be known to somebody else. But they have a baby in junior. Think about what a bad name Brad Pitt is. It is bad, but his first name, his real name is like, Goober McGon. Like, it's like, that's the name. It's name, his real name is like, Gubber McGonk. It's like, his real name is really dumb. I'm gonna look it up.
Starting point is 00:37:10 Gubber McGonk. Well, but if you're gonna change your first name, why not change that awful last name? I know it takes me not even weird. It's actually not. It's a William Bradley pit. No, but whose name is fake? There's somebody where it's like they have a crazy one
Starting point is 00:37:25 like Johnny Depp or something. Well, that's the thing about pit like if you were picking he's John Christopher Depp the second. What? Give me someone who's got a fake name. If you're picking a fake name and you were picking a noun for a last name like a lot of people do it wouldn't be pit. It would you know, I mean like it's oh he's the right. It would be like you know quick. Well, the two things made together just sounds bad to me. How about here's a whole list of celebrities who changed their name. Alicia Keys. Alicia Agello Cook.
Starting point is 00:37:53 Choose change the keys because she plays the piano. Please keep the app record. I know. Ashen Kutcher, Christopher Ashen Kutcher, that was in count. Brad Pitt, same thing. Okay. Matt and a thousand Bruno Mars. Peter Jean Hernandez.
Starting point is 00:38:04 Bruno Jupiter. Yeah. Same thing. Okay. Baden 1000 Bruno Mars. Peter Jean Hernandez Bruno Jupiter. A third. Calvin Harris. Adam Richard Wiles. What's. Why? That's very ladle. Calvin Harris. Nothing. Cardi B. Balculus. Almond's are. That's crazy. Wow. I mean, that's better. I understand that one. That one's hard to say. Demi Moore. Oh, yeah. Oh, John, Reginald Dwight. Demi Moore is D-E-M-E. So, Dean Jean Guines. By the way, about Demi Moore. Demi Moore, I've read something really weird about her because someone was talking about an early 80s movie. And I was like, oh, I haven't seen that movie. So I looked it up and Demi Moore wrote songs
Starting point is 00:38:49 on the soundtrack. For which movie? For this early 80s movie, I can't, maybe Shevin can look it up, but it's, but because her first husband, where she got the name more, like was a record producer or whatever, she started off before she was in actress like writing songs. And- So before she even acted. Yeah, this is before she was like in producer or whatever. She started off before she was an actress like writing songs. And so before she even acted.
Starting point is 00:39:07 Yeah, this is before she was like in movies and stuff. Wow. Like so she's either sings or just wrote the songs to someone else sings on the soundtrack to some movie. It was a bit of trivia. I'd never heard before. I hear some more Demiwore trivia. Mar-Mar-Mar-Mar-Mar. I remember seeing her on the Oprah show.
Starting point is 00:39:24 Your favorite. Demi more trivia more more more I ever seen her on the Oprah show your favorite and she they were they were fielding questions from the audience sure when they do that of course that of course that happens and somebody said how do you pronounce your name to Demi more to Demi more. To Demi Moore. Because it was Demi or is it Demi and Demi Moore goes more? That drove me fucking crazy. Yeah, that's crazy. Frank Ocean, his originally most Christopher Edwin Bruh, B-R-E-A-U-X, but he said he didn't feel it was cool enough.
Starting point is 00:39:58 And in 2011 interview, he said, I changed my name on my birthday last year. It was the most empowering shit I did in 2010 for sure. I went on legal zoom and changed my fucking name. Legal zoom.com just felt cool. They're not lawyers. None of us are our name professionals in the legal. If you don't like your name, then change your name. I'm only a few steps into the process. So I probably shouldn't be talking about this. But by the beginning of summer, I'll be straight. I'll be boarding planes as Christopher Francis Ocean. I like that he, that was the most empowering thing he did in 2010. Yeah, let's hear about
Starting point is 00:40:25 20. I did 50 empowering things in 2010 and this was the most. Yeah, John Legend, John Roger Stevens. Well, that was a thing I read about him. Yeah. That he didn't even like that name from what I from what I heard. John legend. Yeah, someone else was like, Oh, your state name should be John legend. He was like, that's a little corny. And then he went ahead with it. That's big. It's a big, it's a big state legend.
Starting point is 00:40:48 That's a big state. Yeah, yeah. But someone was like, you're so talented. But it was either that or go home. Well, you did go home. Tony Curtis's real name is Bernard Schwartz. Bernard Schwartz.
Starting point is 00:41:04 That's like a classic old Hollywood. Yeah, you gotta, you gotta change your day. Wow. And so he changes it to a vaguely Italian thing. Tony Curtis. Tony Curtis. Yeah, that's very hard. Oh, Miley Cyrus is as good.
Starting point is 00:41:16 Do you know her name? No. Destiny Hope Cyrus. Not she's cool. Where did Miley come from? I think her dad called her smiley my Lee or something Sure, what's his way Billy Ray? Yeah, is it Billy Ray? It's probably are you Billy Ray? Do you know that song or are you Jimmy Ray? Yeah, what is that? It's a song guys?
Starting point is 00:41:40 What is that? I don't know. It's a song, guys. It's a different name, don't they? It is a song. No. I've heard of it. What? I swam.
Starting point is 00:41:48 I did. Now it's two against one. Yeah, but two dumb. You dumb. Go ahead, do two dumb. Fine. Do one dumb. What would this show be like if Paul and I left?
Starting point is 00:41:58 Okay. So finally, okay. So you guys. So finally. First of all. So you're cutting to the end because you have no patience. Oh, I thought it was finally I get to be It is happening to me. No, you're not here. I'm alone and this is my show who are you talking to the people who were singing You couldn't do it.
Starting point is 00:42:25 You need us. You need us. I actually could if I had to. If you both died and I had to keep doing three of them, I could. When? What would this circumstance as me? What would that weird contrast be? Would it be weird?
Starting point is 00:42:42 Would it be weird, Paul, if you and I died on the same day, but not from the same thing, and in totally different ways? But everyone would be expecting me to make a statement. But I'll come in, yet live. That would be a bad thing. I would feel bad for you if you were a statement. But everyone would be like, you gotta go do it, and episode three,
Starting point is 00:42:55 and when you gotta talk about it. And then I'd be like, you guys like, you wouldn't care. I would care, I would cry. No, I don't know. I would least once. Okay. You think I wouldn't care. I would least once. Okay. You think I wouldn't care if you died?
Starting point is 00:43:08 That's insane. I think that. That's, you said you didn't miss us when you were in Hawaii. I think that. I think that you don't care if we die. I think every one of you is wrong. I think you don't care if we live. No, not necessarily that I don't think you care if we die.
Starting point is 00:43:24 I of course would care. I can't even say I wouldn't care. I don't like this bit, Scott. I don't care if we live. No, not necessarily that I don't think you care if we don't. I of course would care. I can't even say I wouldn't care. I don't like this bit, Scott. I don't like it. I think he's being said. It's not a bit. I don't like it. But that's what's fucked up.
Starting point is 00:43:33 You're giggling like a little giggler. I am not. This is not a bad. I'm totally. What if the Joker of the Joker was called the giggler? Would he be as popular? Would it be? Would he be? He was introduced in the 40s?
Starting point is 00:43:45 We get to the point where we're doing like multiple dark movies about. Yeah, the giggler. I don't know. There were the Dr. Giggles. It would work. You think so? I don't know. I think all those things.
Starting point is 00:43:56 I mean, the Joker is stupid enough. I think I'll fans love it. What have you just called Joey? What have you just called Joey Fatone? That may be giggle. Did you see Joey Fatone on with, uh, with, uh, with, Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah, oh, yeah. Um, I see him within saying the Joker is stupid enough, right?
Starting point is 00:44:12 Like that's a dumb name. Yeah, the Riddler's dumb. The Riddler, like all of that is dumb, but we just penguin. So I think it would be fine. Penguin is like a such insane character that he got to play. Danny DeBito. Oh, it would the weird black goo come up for no reason? I wish I could do something like that.
Starting point is 00:44:28 But not all the makeup doesn't I feel annoying every day to have to put on that whole thing? The one time I had to do old age, the prosthetics old age makeup for bang bang. And it was the four hours in the chair and then the two taking it off. It was, um, It was really hard. No, it's really hard to stay still and it's like so annoying. And you also, I think I couldn't, because I was in their way, I couldn't like hold my phone up to at least read while it was happening or anything, you know what I mean? Because like, if I'm miming, by the way, putting my phone, I feel like I would have to listen to a podcast or something or like put on a movie.
Starting point is 00:45:07 Yeah, that might do it. I did it a couple episodes of You're the Worst and there was an episode where... You're Emmy eligible for that, right? I am. So just try to get the campaign going. Yeah, I would. Yeah, honestly, I'm not a big awards person, but I wouldn't mind winning an award. You probably were good in it. I think I did a good job. So
Starting point is 00:45:31 people should check it out. And if you're in any tell us an Academy voter. I was a big fan of the show and I was very grateful that I got to do it. But there was so there was one episode where Alama Clouds character gets something in his eyes and he has an allergic reaction. And so they put all his makeup on his eyes. But that meant that his eyes were effectively sealed shut. Yeah. And so he had to be let around all day. That's like hard.
Starting point is 00:45:54 How did it go? It was a bathroom. Crazy. I think he could see what he had to. He had to mind where his penis was. And as they take it out. Take it out. Like he could talk. He would chant it. Take it out. Like a tank. He would chant it.
Starting point is 00:46:05 Take it out. Take it out. He could talk. He also wouldn't have to tell you where it is. Oh, where his penis is. And then he's like down here. He's doing his nose, doing his foreheads, where he's like outlining a human body.
Starting point is 00:46:20 And then he's pointing. You outlined a woman's body, by the way. That's how his God's body looks. Shut up! He's got womanly hips and rib tach. So Ellen had to be led around all goddamn days. That's so stupid. It was crazy and also we tortured her.
Starting point is 00:46:38 Yeah. All day long. And a fun way, not like it. And my eyes were covered for period, brief periods of time, but I did find it during your period. No. You covered your eyes with period. I go blind during my period. Ah!
Starting point is 00:46:53 Learns crossing your eyes in a boy or a young man. Of course I do. But I had to cover my eyes with something taped to them. So I basically couldn't see for extended periods of time. And I found it really isolating. And I felt that I couldn't tell if people enjoyed my performance. I immediately lost all sense of what was happening. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Starting point is 00:47:14 And that was stressful to me. And I would have a very hard time being blind. Yeah. Did you have a heightened senses in the other? Yeah, it's about everything. I could hear everything. A pin dropped and another county. And I heard it.
Starting point is 00:47:27 Another county. Which county were you in? We were listening to the show. Hawaii County. I heard Hawaii County. All right, we have to take a break. We'll be right back. We're back and it's time for porn.
Starting point is 00:47:47 Let's watch porn and we'll pipe in the audio. Don't worry about it. That's me. What? What do you want? That's me. What do you want? We played this game last season where you do a one word impression of a celebrity and other people have to guess who you're impersonating.
Starting point is 00:48:09 Then we eventually added in that we all had to use the same exact word. I think we should start the round without whatever word you want. So bossy. I don't care. I'm bossy pants. I read Tina Facebook and I learned that. And then the second round. The title. Yeah. I the second. I read the cover of T. David's book, and I learned a lot. And they have Eric Bolden alarms now.
Starting point is 00:48:30 That's his arms on the cover. Oh, is it really? Yeah. I want a great guy. And then the second round, we use the same word as each other. So we're starting using the same word? No, we start using whatever word you want that will help us guess. OK. It's helpful to use a word that's theme of the person. No, we start using whatever word you want that will help us guess. Hmm. Okay.
Starting point is 00:48:45 It's helpful to use a word. God is. Theme of the person. God is. I have to think of people to imitate. Yeah. Lauren started us off. Medicine.
Starting point is 00:49:02 Do you say medicine? Oh, medicine. You do a warm heart, huh? Medicine. Do you say medicine? Oh, medicine. You do a warm or time? Medicine. Morgan Freeman. No, it was really my guess too. Medicine. What happens next is is Paul guess?
Starting point is 00:49:25 Or do I guess? I guess I have to guess. Ready? Yeah. Medicine. Medicine. Medicine. Medicine.
Starting point is 00:49:37 Share. No. Do we just keep going? But the word is related. Oh. It's like I'm choosing a word that's like part of my my it's like I can't say a full sentence as this person But I could say one word that might help okay medicine James Seymour medicine Madison
Starting point is 00:49:58 This came is insane. We're never gonna guess it. Why not so obviously your impression isn't good We're never gonna guess it. Why not so obvious? Because your impression isn't good. Madison. All the listeners are hearing is you saying medicine over. No, George W. They wouldn't have to hear us if you guessed right. Medicine.
Starting point is 00:50:14 If you were doing it better, we would guess right. Madison. What, who would say medicine? See, Everett Koop. Who would say medicine? See, I read, Koop. Who would say medicine? Who would say medicine? Generally. Adopt.
Starting point is 00:50:31 He was a general. Dr. Strange. No. Medicine. Medicine. Doctor. Wait, is this one of the barnels and James guys? No.
Starting point is 00:50:43 Medicine. Medicine. Me, a doctor on TV? Doctor Phil. Yep. No. Marathon. Marathon. A doctor on TV? Dr. Phil. Dr. Phil wouldn't say medicine. If you said boot camp, I'm sorry. If you said boot camp, I'm sorry. He might say just it.
Starting point is 00:50:58 Okay. Fine, you're a turn. Somebody go. Somebody be better than me. Okay. Are you going? I'll go. Oranges.
Starting point is 00:51:12 Yeah, this is the easiest game in the world. Okay, what? Oranges. Oranges. Oranges. I was gonna say P.B. was well you didn't say you were a woman. Okay fine I thought so too I thought so too I just okay my oranges though no reason you didn't say it had to relate yes I did It's the word is depression. Oranges relates to Pee Weherman more than
Starting point is 00:51:46 Madison released a Dr. Phil. Jerry. Having better. And it's a fruit. Okay. Apartment. Check lemon. Apartment. Apartment. apartment apartment Matthew Leblanc apartment apartment David Swimmer apartment apartment. Uh, I'm Lauren.
Starting point is 00:52:25 Frazier. Frazier. Apartment. Did Frazier live in an apartment or was it a house? Is it a apartment? John Lithgow. Is it a man? Apartment.
Starting point is 00:52:39 Who had apartments? Apartment. You're you're lifting up your index finger a lot. Apartment. Apartment. Apartment. What? Bill and Ted.
Starting point is 00:53:03 How's willing grace? Is it the odd couple? Okay, Walter Matt that's not two people. Walter Matt, now and Jack 11. Oh, Tony Randall. Get it, give it some flourish. I'm trying to give it a little own, you know what I mean? Like
Starting point is 00:53:22 giving some to the person. I'm trying to give it a little oomph, you know what I mean? Like giving some try to do the person. Apartment. You're bugging your eyes. Is it Jeff Goldblum? Yes. Oh, apartments.com. Nice.
Starting point is 00:53:35 I didn't know why, but I got I got the impression. Okay. So now we do around because when you booked out your eyes, yeah, I was like, I know what that is. Now we do around a reality. Use the same word and the word is apartment. And. Oh, no. Everybody has to do a different person, okay?
Starting point is 00:53:52 Who goes first, you? Same order? Same order. Mm, smorder. Just trying to think of somebody. Sure, it's very hard. It is hard. It's hard to think of people.
Starting point is 00:54:04 That's why I'm so thought. Okay. A potent. Dr. Ruth. No, no, I know who it is. A potent. Barbara Walters. Yes. Okay, I'm gonna say apartment as this person. Good setup. The game. The one rule. We didn't even play the song for it. It's got to be more than one rule. It does. It's called rules.
Starting point is 00:54:37 The song is called rules. It's called new rules. Apartment. Got a need to hear it again. apartment. Got a need to hear it again. Apartment. I'll fold when yes. Wow.
Starting point is 00:54:57 Was I that good? Yeah. Wow. Okay. You want me to film you? It was by the way, it was the physicality. It was. If you're listening and you're like, how did you get out of the impression? Okay.
Starting point is 00:55:07 Not part of the show for the listener. Yep. Apartment. Danny Divide. Yes, John Polito. Who are you going to guess? John Polito. Oh, John Polito.
Starting point is 00:55:17 John Polito. All right. One more round. And this is where it's oranges. Oranges. And um, John. All right, one more round. One more round. And this is where it's oranges. Orange is. And, um, okay.
Starting point is 00:55:32 Okay. Orange is. Guilder Radner. Yeah. Orange is. Paula Poundstone. Oranges. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh Orange you're sort of like I imagine you sitting cross-legged are you sitting cross-legged in this? No, sit like this sitting like this. Okay
Starting point is 00:56:09 Orange is Maria Bamford Yes, Orange is Renée Zellweiger You were closer I was closer No, Scott was closer with Louise Lasser or with Maria Bamford? Yeah, with Louise I don't know the fuck that is. I'm sorry. I just remember her sitting cross-legged on SNL doing a modeling. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:31 So that's what that reminded me. She was high out of her mind. Melissa Via Senor. No, but her doing an impression. Somebody else. Right. Sarah Silverman. Yeah. Sarah Silverman. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:45 Ah. Ah. Ah. I'm just. Yeah. I hear it now. Maybe a little higher pitch, but yeah. It's minus too high.
Starting point is 00:56:53 No, no. Oh, hers is higher. Hers is maybe more like orange. Like a little higher. Ah, I'm just. No. Oh, shit. I had someone who was.
Starting point is 00:57:02 Oh, shit. Oh, yeah. Ah. Oh, not oranges. Jack Leppett. Yes. Okay. So much stuff for oranges. All right, Paul.
Starting point is 00:57:20 Do you got who you got? Oh Now I'm thinking of people that I feel like I did the last time we did this Sorry A little do do someone we've all met So we've all met Flip around flip around flip Flip around, flip around. Flip up the flip down. Flip around.
Starting point is 00:57:47 I fucking phone. Paul is trying to tape all of this, probably presumably to show you the listeners. No, I'm gonna delete these as soon as I'm gonna call her. All right. Arringes. Eddie Peppaton. Arringes.
Starting point is 00:58:06 Arringes. Eddie Peppaton, oranges. Orange-ish. Orange-ish. I thought Eddie Peppaton too was weird. Orange-ish. Orange-ish. This is someone we met. Orange-ish. Drew Tarver. Does he sell oranges? Yeah, it's that guy in the corner
Starting point is 00:58:33 of the world. You came up. I don't know what he does. I'm taking it again. Coincidentally, he sells oranges. Orange. Orange. Is this a famous person or just someone we've built? Is it a comedian? It's someone you've met. It's a comedian. It's someone we've met. Orange.
Starting point is 00:58:52 Hey, my name is... I'm trying to do this person. Good technique. Hi, oranges. Hello. I'm... Hi, oranges. Hi, oranges.
Starting point is 00:59:03 I'm this person. Is it a comedian? Yes. Arringes. Nobody else got the hints. Some saying. Okay, but we did. Or where were you doing physical?
Starting point is 00:59:15 Even though they did, they no one did. Arringes. Arringes. Arringes. Give me a little movement. Just stand up. Give us a little something, you know what I mean? I'm not going to stand up.
Starting point is 00:59:28 And I don't know what movement would help, honestly. What's this person like move like? You know, think of it this way. How do they move and how would you show us? The movements of community. The movements of community. RNGs. RNGs. RNGs.
Starting point is 00:59:44 Who have I met? No, I made it like a horrible parameter. Arringes. Arringes. Arringes. Who have I met? No, I made it like a horrible parameter. Arringes. Arringes. I don't know. Do you guys give up? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:54 Yeah, I give up. Who is it? It's Gabriel's man. John Gabriel's. First of all, there's plenty of physicality to go with that. Give me an example. Arringes. No. First of all, there's plenty of physicality to go with that. Give me an example. Ranges. If I were doing time, okay, let me try to see.
Starting point is 01:00:11 Let's see if we can each. I'll be able to get it. Okay, sure. You know. This guy arranges. Okay, here's mine. Aaron. Arringes. Okay, here's mine.
Starting point is 01:00:24 Aaron. Aaron is. No. All right. I see where I made a mistake. You were, you guys both nailed it. I did a little physical. Orange is really hard work.
Starting point is 01:00:36 You do a little physicality. You just added. I was saying like he needs to be saying like. Fucking orange. Yeah, that's right. Orange. Orange is oranges. I fucking be saying like fucking orange fucking orange Orange Orange is I fucking
Starting point is 01:00:47 Orange I fucking Orange is Yeah, yeah Well that was super fun Yeah That was delightful I mean look we all did at least one good one where we immediately got it
Starting point is 01:00:59 It's true You know you had Barbara Walters over there Lauren you had Danny DeVito I had Jack Lemon Lemon. I had Jack Lemon lemon lemon lemon dry. Global lemon. Mr. Lemon sang oranges. Mr. Orange is saying lemons. I don't know where it just. Oh, he loves his impression. Too many mouth. I know. I know. I know. My misophonios kick it in. I would have. Oh, my misophonios. Oh, misophonios. Yeah, oh, I'm a miss a phone. He's a phone. Yeah,
Starting point is 01:01:27 I would love to hear Al Pacino say that. I miss phone. He's kicking. Oh, well, you started did it. It is impressive. Yeah, that's good enough for me. Oh, can I please play you? I don't know what this is from.
Starting point is 01:01:41 Okay, good. My friend Aaron Abrams posted this. It's a screen grab of something that he was watching with his alpichino. I, it looks recent. Recent piece. Here he goes. Let me, let me wait till loops around again.
Starting point is 01:01:58 Recent piece. There's a dongle here. You can plug in and everything. That's the dongle. This is a dongle. That's a dongle here you can plug in and everything. That's not a dongle. This is a dongle. That's a dongle? Yep.
Starting point is 01:02:09 I got the new dongle. It'll fit in my case. Okay, here we go. Good night. Tana talking. Tony, I gotta get off the phone. You're gonna do this. The heck I'm feeling your voice.
Starting point is 01:02:24 I know. I know I'm gonna go home. I wanna play it on the pillow. And I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it.
Starting point is 01:02:34 I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it.
Starting point is 01:02:42 I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it.
Starting point is 01:02:37 I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it. I want to dream about it! To get to that point in your career, where it's like I can do whatever I want. And it is watchable though. Like yeah, I would really enjoy. It's a strong choice that I enjoyed. The name Sam Pancake was underneath this cord
Starting point is 01:02:56 the entire time. Oh my God, it's like it's watching under us. Sam, we hope we pleased you with this episode. Thank you, Mr. Pancake. Oh, thank you, Sam. Oh, well guys, we gotta wrap pleased you with this episode. Thank you, Mr. Pancake. Oh, thank you, Sam. Oh, well guys, we gotta wrap it up. We do. We gotta, you know.
Starting point is 01:03:10 It's the way it goes sometimes. Yeah. Well, but play, play, play, play, play, play new rules. Play new rules if you could. Wow, you know guys, it's sad to say goodbye at the end of every episode. Yeah. But it's happy because we know we're gonna see each other for the next episode.
Starting point is 01:03:31 That's right. Unless something terrible happens, where Paul and I both die at the same time and you're not sad. I'll still do the episodes. I'll complete the contract. Uh-huh. Well, wait, will we receive our portion of- You're gonna take our money? Yes, I'm the one doing the work give it to our widows. No, and that's that
Starting point is 01:03:49 Well, at least when you're doing when the show is windowed and you're doing the ads for dick bills At least that money should go to our widows. Yeah, if I'm doing ads for dick pills, I'm getting the money That's fair Do you think I've now gotten rid of them as a sponsor because they refer to them as dick bills? Look, they're pills for your dick. They shouldn't be ashamed of that. That's what it is.
Starting point is 01:04:13 And they work. They work on your dick. Hey, I don't want to hear about it. They should call it dick in a box. They should. But are they in like us, maybe they're not a box. They're in like a circular. Eventually, I mean, you get a box in the mail mail for sure. Yeah, that's true guys later. Bye
Starting point is 01:04:28 One you

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