Threedom - Threevisiting: Emojourney

Episode Date: May 21, 2024

Threevisiting on the Tues: Scott, Paul & Lauren discuss Easter, their quarantine phases and celebrities they could be friends with before playing One Noise Impressions. Send Threetures and emails to [e-mail]. Leave us a voicemail at HAGCLAIMS8.com. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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And when you look up, you think about mash because there's a helicopter. Suicide is painless, brings on many changes. Welcome to Freedom. And I can take or leave any life, please. One, two, three, four, oh, one, two, three, four, five, six. You know what I started watching that I'm enjoying, but I have not continued watching.

Yes, Lauren Lapkus. But we, Cool Up actually talked about it when I was on Add to Cart. Tell me, Paul F. Tompkins. Okay. Tell me, Scott Aukerman. It's called Call My Agent, and it's on Netflix, and it's French, and it's really funny.

La la. I like it. I've heard good things about it. I haven't seen it yet. Everyone was telling me it was good and I was just putting my heels down. Call my agent, what is this about my afternoon? Oh my God.

You're in it. What are they gonna say? A 2 p.m. bathroom break too? Is that a show? No, there's a French guy pretending to be you. Oh shit. It's about you and your agent. What?

Yeah. Yeah, and he's like really Yeah, it's he's wearing like prosthetics, but you do what it's like a living character knows yeah every everything is just exaggerated He's a real dork, but cool right Watching I you know what Jamie, and I just watched another round the Danish film starring a man You watch a lot of um. Subtitled things? Yeah, true. I watch a lot of Danish bullshit. It's an Oscar nominated film.

And it's very good. It's about four friends who decide they are going to test this theory that you should maintain a constant level of blood alcohol in order to live life to the fullest. Oh, so constantly have a buzz on or? What's it called again? Another round.

Hmm, okay. And now I understand why. It's funny, it's touching. Cause they're all shaped in like a circle? They want another round. Yeah, they need one more guy We're all round Y'all wear John Glenn glasses Every John should have their own signature shape of glasses.

Yes. Don't you agree? Every John. Who are you John Glenn? Do you have triangle? Stop sign shaped glasses. No one does those. You don't refer to it as a hexagon.

I do after watching Wandavision, certainly. Oh sure. I don't get it. Did you watch any of that Lauren? I didn't, but. I don't get it. Yes. Did you watch any of that, Lauren? I didn't, but I thought, I like what it looks like. I just know I won't understand any of the references. I understood a lot of the references. I'm not as steeped in that lore.

Like, I probably didn't. I probably missed a bunch of sort of Easter egg type things. Yeah. But. Speaking of Easter. That's the holiday we're coming right up on. I think we just had it. Yeah, but speaking of Easter. That's the holiday. We're coming right up It's over That was a worthy interruption oh my god, yeah, don't you shut up shut up Easter

And we did nothing I swear to God Easter hat just happened on Sunday. No, because it's coming up this Sunday. It's incredible. In real life, but this recording. No, but I'm saying we already recorded one that will come out next week. Yeah, Easter just happened, guys.

And then we're on the next one. This is insanity. You are not making sense. How did you spend it? I, I, here's the thing. Last Easter, I had a I had a flashback. The rest. And a flashback to last Easter because I.

Oh, my God. So last Easter, we had been locked down. My heart briefly for like a couple of weeks. OK, but I was kind of. I mean, it was more than a couple of weeks because it wasn't what's his name going like? We're gonna open up at Easter, it's gonna be fabulous. Okay, maybe it was a month at that point.

So we're kind of- Al Pacino from Dick Tracy. But I decided- Oh, she's got a great ass. I put on an Easter dress and I was like, I'm gonna have an- The scent of a hoo-ha. I'm gonna have Easter

and I'm gonna feel like it's Easter. You got your Easter tree. I put on a dress. Do you spend Easter, like do you like it's Easter. You got your Easter tree. I put on a dress. Do you spend Easter? Like do you like it? Do you does it mean something to you? I guess I just I like traditions and I like like I would like to watch the Easter parade I would like to watch the movie Easter parade or there's a literal parade happening. There's a parade isn't it like um I don't know is there where here or something. I like to watch bullshit like that. I like to watch

I like to watch specials. I like to watch television special events. I'm very excited about them. Like I would like to watch Charlie Brown Easter. I want to watch like something that feels like it's happening and marking time. And at the time I was- The movie Alien, all those eggs? And Paul really knows that we were playing

Animal Crossing heavily at that time. Yes, we were. And the Easter bunny was on the island and it was very stressful trying to get all those eggs that time. Yes, we were. That's right. The Easter Bunny was on the island and it was very stressful trying to get all those eggs in time. Yes. You found something that you can talk about that I don't know about. Yes.

And I wanted to kill that fucking bunny and he's back apparently, but I haven't been playing for a long time. Clearly it's Tom Nook in a costume. I know because he has a zipper and it's kind of haunting. And if you look at the zipper, he's like, stop looking at that. Yeah. But I just saw a picture of myself from that,

and I was like, you know, that was like a very, I have such a visceral reaction to- What did you put on a dress and play Animal Crossing? That's honestly what I did, but I'm saying, I'm saying, I'm not saying that was like cool, but I'm saying like, I have this feeling about that time of quarantine where I can like taste and smell it. It's like, it's like such a specific time.

Do you remember the phases, the quarantine phases you've been through? Yeah, I've had a bunch of different things. And at that time I was getting CSA boxes, those like farm boxes of fruits and vegetables. The Confederate States of America. Because I could not get delivery with my groceries. I was going to the grocery store, but I would stock up for like a couple weeks and blah, blah, blah. List your phases, list your quarantine phases.

Well, roasting vegetables was a serious one of them. Roasting vegetables. Because I was using these boxes and I had to like use them all. So I would roast vegetables. What would you do? put them on a pan 450 like olive oil olive oil seasonings cut up whatever I got so it'd be like carrots potatoes sure Whatever the fuck they send me you ever see a rabbit wearing glasses no good point and

Then cook it for like a Easter bunny at the Trump White House? That's a good point too. So yes I have. More huge glasses. I just felt like I can smell those vegetables and I started to get so sick of my boxes because they have the same thing and then I started to like hate how it was. So you started to hate your vegetables.

And it's like a rubbery carrot and I'm like, ah. And then I couldn't stand it anymore so I had to stop. Can you imagine like growing up on a farm then and you're like growing up on a farm then and how and and you're Like you're you're the farmer or you're the farmers wife and that's all that you eat is whatever that person is growing Yeah, how sick of it? You know what I mean? Like could you grow anything other than broccoli? I don't they don't they don't get anything besides what they grow. That's it No, what some people they don, they don't go to market

more than once every two months. I think they sell that food. No, they do. I'm saying like some- They probably keep enough to have a couple carrots. I'm not saying farmers now. I'm saying farmers back when they- Let's join farmers only.

They only ate the one thing. You don't know what you're talking about. I'm just messing with you. I'm talking messing with you. I'm talking to you now. Ignored. What are some of your other phases? Roasted vegetables was a big phase for me.

That was a long time. I had my... When we first got Peacock, I had my phase, lasted six weeks maybe, where I watched Poker After Dark. Oh yeah. I had my Entourage phase, where I watched all of Entourage again. I had my Power Walking with my Weights phase, Blasting Music, where I was like, I'm actually doing fine.

And that was like a good couple months where I was feeling pretty solid about that. I had my Making Cakes phase. That was a solid one. I had my Steve Harvey Family Feud phase. Wow. I had, now I'm in my Star Trek Next Generation phase where I'm almost done with that. I kind of need a phase. Wow. I had, now I'm in my Star Trek Next Generation phase where I'm almost done with that. I kind of need a phase. My justified phase. I mean, Animal Crossing was a big phase for me and it led me to a paid gig so I wasn't

really mad about that. That's good. I had my writing phase, that was good, that was really productive. I haven't really had any productive phases. That was the one thing I was like, I cannot have this happen for a year and not come out of it with something. And so I just like- That's true, I mean, I guess I have done something. Sat down and like made myself write a pilot and I finished it and I was like very glad. Well, that's good.

Paul, do you have any phases? Yes, thank you for asking. You were always allowed to chime in. You have to- Even though you're ignored, you can chime in. You guys were going back and forth so quickly. We were at a good clip. I was like, I'm not gonna yell to talk about my phases.

Oh, I'll do that. No, I know you will. I learned by negative example. Oh my God. Speak softly, Paul, and tell us your phases. Carry a big stick. My phases were, I think of them as clothing-based. I went through a pajamas phase

where I wear full sets of pajamas. Yes, like all day long. All day long, yes. Good, good, good. I went through a coveralls phase where I was wearing like sort of speed suits. Yep. I went through a very depressive like,

like regular pajamas phase, like t-shirt and soft pants. I did a lot of, I felt like the real giving up. No, me wearing sweatpants in public was giving up. Like I, I have like wherever I was going, I never wore, I, you wearing Crocs in public was, it was giving up. I never wore sweatpants in public before, unless I was traveling maybe, but even then, only for a long flight.

That was really a, like, I don't, I'm not proud of that. That was, I would only do that if I was coming from the gym. Yeah, totally. And I also feel like what I've just remembered is that I have a lot of shoes. And I was like, I've been wearing the same, like two pairs of shoes for a year. I wore sandals from the start of quarantine all the way up till maybe November or something like that,

and then switched over to the Crocs. But isn't it funny? And just have switched back to sandals now. But isn't it just like, wait, why did I think that because I had to wear a mask, I couldn't even put an outfit on? Like what? Well, I mean, it's like- It seemed pointless, but it seemed like, well, that's a sign of depression.

It is, but- But also like mass depression. Yeah, I feel like everyone was going through it where it's just like, well, why should I even fucking bother to put on a hard shoe? No, because I never, I didn't wear makeup for like a full year because no one was seeing me. Yeah, except for like on, you know,

if I had to do like a Zoom or something. I know, but then some days I put it on and I'm like, oh, I look so much better. Do I look sexy, Mike? No, but like, if I put it on, I'll go, oh yeah, I feel better. Like it's like just that you kind of forget all the things that you like. But I don't think I feel better if I put on a button-up shirt

and pants anymore. You might not. Now, and I wore that every single day for most of my life. And now I'm like, oh, wait a minute, maybe I'm a sweats guy now. Maybe I'm a sweats and shorts guy. For me, it was definitely like, I would feel, I absolutely noticed it when I would have to put on clothes

to go somewhere for whatever, for the few times that I had to do. And I was like, I really like this. I feel more human. Yeah. Humon. Yeah. Humon.

One of your humon customs. It's true. No, I mean, it's the same for exercising in a way where you're like, oh, wow, I literally do feel better if I do this. I know. And then the next day you're just like, what, I'm going to do this every day of my life? I look back on the time and like part of me is pissed that I didn't maintain things that I was doing before.

And the way I'm having my headphones. What is going on with your headphones? They hurt my ears. Oh, okay. Because it's too loud or what? No, because we've had them on for so long. I was doing before, the way I'm had by headphones. What is going on with your headphones? They hurt my ears. Oh, OK. Because it's too loud or what? No, because we've had them on for so long.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. They're pushing my head. Well, your ears are also shaped like headphones. A lot of people don't know that. Yeah, I don't know if anyone's realized that. They're like one size bigger than the actual headphones you have. Yeah.

But I look back and I think. You look like you're in a movie pretending to be a DJ. This is literally a role I'm going to get to. Where I'm like, I'm always in a control room. But I feel like I look back and I think, oh man, I had such good habits, like right before this happened. I was really working out like three times a week at classes that I would go to. I was doing like four or five days a week.

I was doing seven. I was doing 18 days a week. And I... 18 days a week. But I'm sad that I couldn't keep it up. But like I hadn't... But no one could keep it up. I know, but it's like, I feel mad at myself,

but I also don't know that's stupid. What about Dwayne The Rock Johnson? Yeah. But like I didn't have like a way to do that. Even The Rock probably like let something slip during quarantine. You think he had a cheat snack at one point? No, but I mean like maybe he was like, you know what, I'm going to take up the guitar

and then it just like abandoned it or whatever. I had my guitar phase by the way. I had my piano phase. That was brief, but I do want to get back into it. Signature cocktail phase where every night at like 5 p.m. it was like, let's make a brand new unique weird cocktail. Oh, I had a drinking wine every night phase. That came in and out.

Eating whole bags of chips phase. Yeah, well, like saying like, let's just have Doritos now. Yeah. Yeah. Like you just go like, yeah, it's time to party. I'm not going to like. So are we do you feel like we're coming out of it? I think I am. I mean, we just celebrated Easter.

I think mentally I am coming out of it a little bit because even today I was like, I'm gonna find a pair of shoes I haven't worn the entire year and that's what I'm wearing today. Or is that what that is? I've worn one of these in forever. I got my green shoes on.

But it felt special to go like, hey, you know what? I could still put together an outfit. Yeah. You know what? Spring has sprung. Even for assholes like us. Exactly.

Even for assholes like us. Spring has sprung, and it felt good to me to put on actual clothing, a belt. Yeah. And I mean, we can't ignore the fact that everyone's getting vaccinated, and it actually feels like we're going to be able to do something. And I am half-vaxxed. I get my second one in a couple weeks.

Which side were you? Left side. Did you get your butt cheek? Left side? Butt cheek? No, my face. I said give it to me. Are you supposed to switch arms?

Yeah, I said give it to me right in the cheekbone. I just want a little lift. You're not supposed to switch arms. No, you're supposed to get the your non-dominant arm because you'll like a lot of people get COVID arm, which is like for a week. It's bumpy and hurts and stuff like that. Mine wasn't too bad. It was sore for a day.

And then after that, it was only if I pressed on it. Which you love to do. I know that you're a real press on my arm guy. I was asking people, please, press on my arm, please. That's the only way we can get you to talk, too. I was looking for a pressing arm, daddy. That's what I put a versatile hat out on. Now Lauren has swapped the headphones down

to where the top of it is down by her. That's been like this for a while. You had it where the strap was on your forehead. I don't like how they feel on my head. You need new headphones, girl. You look like you're in a futuristic thing. They feel bad. You look like Jordy.

I know everything in Star Trek to me now because. Oh my God, let it go. Jordy LeForge. LeForge. So what do you want your next phase to be? Like, what do you hope for? Getting out of here. Yes.

Well, okay, besides that, what do you hope to bring back? Like, just besides seeing people? I wouldn't mind getting back into the writing phase. I did, thankfully, complete a big project the other day. That's nice. So I was like, oh good, I'm not just going to sit here going like, well sure I did one thing but I finished it in July and then from July till March I never did anything else. So I finished another thing. So I'm happy about that.

Do you know, I went on a little journey recently, emotional journey, because I think I've told you guys that I'm, yeah, I've told- Emo journey. Digitizing, emo journey. Yes. I told you guys I'm digitizing all this stuff. You didn't just tell us, you've been sending it to us.

I've been sending some clips. What was that long 20 minute one that I didn't watch? Oh, that wasn't me. I didn't watch it either. That was someone else. Shaggy! Well, I skipped around in it, that wasn't me. I didn't watch it. That was Why skipped around it, but I was confused It wasn't me that was on me I that was a video that I think Have you seen the commercial of fucking Ash and Kutcher Emila Kunis singing? It wasn't me, but it's like

You know what? I've seen it without the sound. Okay, he's like he's like Ash and Kutcher Kutcher and Mila Kunis singing It Wasn't Me, but it's like really off tune. You know what? I've seen it without the sound. Oh, cause he's like, it's like Ashton Kutcher is singing and he doesn't know the notes. Okay. So I would say, check it out. Which part is he singing? No thanks. Oh, cause it's about Doritos. It wasn't me.

It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me.

It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It wasn't me. It's about Cheetos. Now wait. Cheeto dust. But is this because Popchips dropped him after he did that offensive Indian character? Now Shaggy, I don't know why Shaggy was in the commercial. It was a Super Bowl thing or something. Shaggy, where are you lately? Anyway, what were you gonna say? Let's see if I remember. He was going through old videos.

So going through old videos and stuff. Oh my God. He's looking for someone. He's looking for someone. He's looking for someone. Helicopter. That dude's close. I can't wait till it ends up with you getting arrested He's looking for someone, he's looking for someone, he's looking for someone, helicopter! That dude's close. I can't wait till it ends up with you getting arrested or the helicopter lands in your yard

and comes and gets you and we've all been like, What if I'm recruited like an independent stay? Here's the dream I had! But I also ate roasted vegetables! So it was making me, I started with the oldest stuff because I thought that would be logical, when chronological thought that

would amuse me. And it didn't. It made me feel bad. And I cringed at myself. I think that sometimes watching old stuff is cringe. Makes watching old movies I'm really sad. Yeah. And so it was it was

well, you also were watching your old performance. Yes. Just home movies. It was really hard. And then as I got into more recent stuff, where I was good, I was like, oh yeah. Of course it's a progression. Right, right.

But I was, I was in a bad, because I was, you know, I was depressed and I was in a bad state where I was like, oh, I've always been bad. California? Where Lodi is located? Oh my God, I think watching old stuff like that would just make you think you suck. Yeah. That's exactly what it did. I was like, oh, this is, I'm always been. Or Lodi is looking at me. Oh my God, I think watching old stuff like that would just make you think you suck. Yeah.

That's exactly what it did. I was like, oh listen, this is, I'm not good. I never was good. Yeah. I've always, because it was a weird thing where I thought I was like better in these high school plays than I was for some reason. Yeah.

And so when I watched it, I'm like, oh no, of course I'm terrible like everybody else. I thought you were fine in the clip that I saw where you called her the wobbly old slut. The wobbly hip slut. That was hilarious. But then, but then I'm terrible like everybody else. I thought you were fine in the clip that I saw where you called her the wobbly old slut. The wobbly hip slut? That was hilarious. But then you seemed good. You always had like a sense of...

You could tell you had a natural talent. A natural talent and also you had... You guys don't have to do that. I appreciate that but I was not looking for that. I'm telling you my opinion. I don't care if you were looking for it. You got last doing your little dance. Your little hula.

No, I just felt that you always had like a sense of maturity about your performance that I even saw in that carousel where I was like, this guy. No, that was the teacher. Oh, that's right. The one that kissed the South Pacific. No, I felt like you had, like you're like. Horrifying clip.

Okay, yeah. That was sick. You had a natural talent and it hadn't developed yet But I was like, oh wow This guy like obviously knows what it means to be acting and to be an artist and seems to have Influences that you know, other kids are just like hey, hello mister and you you seem to be grounded in any way So hey, hello mister But then I was watching like the, you know, my variety shows from Margot.

Thank you. I tried to prevent you from giving it. But I was watching, you know, me doing standup and stuff. And I'm like, oh man, I forgot that I, it's been so long that I forgot that this was something that I really enjoyed and was good at. So that's a question though. So when we go back to reality, do you feel excited about getting back on stage?

Yes I do. Oh boy! Stand up? I feel more creative than I have in a long time. That's exciting! I want to do stand up, I want to do variety shows again. I loved doing it. I loved doing it.

That's exciting. I have to find a place to do it. Well, due to dynasty. Maybe I will. I love for you to do it in this backyard for us only. And it's like a private family show. Too many helicopters. What a fight. Speaking of which, I watched a very funny special, comedy special on Netflix by Nate Bargatze. Oh, he's great. Where he did it. That's how you say it. Bargatze. Bargatze. Hey, Bargatze. And, he's great. Where he did it. That's how you say it. Yeah, Nate Bargatze. Bargatze, hey, Bargatze. And he did it outside at Universal Studios.

Oh, he did? Oh, cool. And so periodically. During the pandemic. Yeah, so periodically there's helicopters overhead. And he's very funny about them. Oh, cool. I wanna watch, there's a new documentary that. About women in comedy?

Yes. Yes, with Bonnie McFarland. It's called Hysterical, right? Yeah. And it comes out tonight, so it's already out when you're listening to this. I mean, we celebrate Easter, so of course we know it's out. Jesus Christ.

I'm planning to watch it this weekend. I'm excited about that. But yeah, I feel you. I'm like, I can't imagine how exciting it'll be to do a show after all this. I feel like improv shows, like, just the idea of being back at UCB with everyone just to mess around sounds so fun Yeah, can you imagine the next time that we do a show in front of like 20,000 people?

How awesome that's gonna be? That's positive thinking oh my god, you know what? I mean next time we could get 20,000 because everyone's so desperate to go. Let me out of here. No, but then everyone's gonna be spending all their money on a hundred different concerts and then we'll have nobody. I think the industry will be booming.

They'll always choose concerts over us. Oh my God, I would go to a concert. We're a concert. We're a kind of concert, guys. Don't dismiss us. I would love to go to anything. I really wanna go to a play. I really wanna go.

I wanna go to theater. But I wonder if you're gonna have to wear a mask at the theater for a long time. Cause I also feel like that, I mean, I really want to go to a play. I really want to go, I want to go to theater, but I wonder if you're going to have to wear a mask at the theater for a long time. Cause I also feel like that, I mean, I would do it, but I just like the, I like the energy of everyone's. We'll see. Do you know what I miss? I miss, I really, when you said UCB,

I miss running into people backstage. Me too, because it was half of my social life. Well, it's probably 90% of it was just the people I ran into. Now of course we don't actually talk to these people about real things backstage. Well, that is the thing. I'm gonna say we have- But it's fun to just run into social-

It's not like you have like, no, you don't have these deep relationships, but you're seeing people regularly where you're like, oh, hey. And it just feels like, oh, I saw people tonight. And then you go home and you're like, I have a social life. I don't need to go out.

I'd run Twitter, run into people, and you go home. You're like I have a social life. Yeah, I don't need to go out I'd watch whether well, that's how I have a random conversation Then have a coffee with everyone once a week and that's what your whole up is Cool up is very social and so she Would go out and see her friends a lot and and she'd be like, how come you don't like to go out and see your friends All the time. I'm like, well, you know, I'm I'm in the studio doing so many podcasts It's like and we have these like 10 minute conversations before or after the show. It feels like I have a social life.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You see a lot of people. And I was just having a whole conversation with someone on FaceTime last night about how like, there's some fear, I think I have some fear about going back and the expect social expectations Right that coming back that like and like moving at the pace we used to move Where I don't know that I'm ready for in terms of emotionally or in terms of in terms of just like busyness and like oh, okay

and like yeah an emotional like Friends you haven't seen through a lot of the pandemic and then you feel like you have to like fix it or like make up for all this time. Where I feel pretty much everyone's off the hook in my mind. Like I don't- All bets are off. Like if I was not your friend beforehand, let's strike up a friendship.

If I was- You just want to go full opposites. Yeah, if I was, I don't want to see you again. I feel like I was talking to someone about this the other day that it was a friend of mine posted online something about how if you if I have one task to do, you know, during lockdown, if I have one task to do, that's my whole. Yes, it consumes me. And then after I do it, I'm exhausted. Yes. Right. And I and it and how do it, I'm exhausted. Yes. And I, and how kind of shameful it feels.

Meanwhile, you used to do 20 things in a day. Yeah. And I felt like it's, I said, yeah, it's like the opposite of a fish growing to the size of its bowl. It's like you shrink down to what your life is at the time, and it feels the same as it did. So life will always just feel exhausting?

Kind of. I don't know, it's just weird. Like, I will go on like one errand. I think it's your frame of mind. Right. My thing lately is that I'm like, I will go for a walk in a different neighborhood and then I Like just somewhere where I know there aren't a lot of people out But that I can have a pleasant walk and look at some pretty houses

And then I'll get in my car and kind of like drive and just like see what's going on And like this feels like I had a day like that's my thing Yeah, and then I'll look at the people living their life like it's normal, and then I feel crazy when I get back at my house. I go, wow, I drove in Pasadena, and everyone's having lunch outside. And it's just-

Definitely, I was talking to someone the other day who's like, oh yeah, nothing changed for me. I go into the office every day. He's just like, I'm the only one here, but yeah. Well then, something did change for you. You're the only one there. Yeah, day. He's like, I'm the only one here. But yeah, I go in. Something did change for you. You're the only one there. Yeah. Yeah. That's weird.

But I guess it's to me on Twitter. Like I posted something about I can't remember what it was just about how strange things feel and whatever. And this guy wrote to me and said, is it really that different? I'm like, yes, it really is. Oh my God, my life is just like. For some people, they don't have the ability to change. Yes, because then he described his life.

And I was like, yeah, not everybody has your exact life. So it's not, it can't be. Like, well, I already worked from home and I had blah, blah, blah, whatever. Yeah, I can't be the only person you're hearing this from, that things are different. I'm the inventor of Zoom, so no, nothing changed things that are different. I'm the inventor of zoom. So no, nothing changed for me.

Everything. I hate that I know what zoom is. Yeah. I even know what the sound is, but you know what I think ignored, you know, what I think about that? This was, I was thinking about, like, when we go back, I'm like, I, I would like to suggest that times I don't'm like, I would like to suggest that times I don't feel like,

if I'm gonna do someone's podcast, but I don't really have all the time in the world, I could do it on Zoom. Yeah, absolutely. And then we can make it easier on everyone or like a general meeting where you would normally have to drive an hour, talk to someone for 20 minutes,

and then drive home for an hour. We'll do it on Zoom, we all do now. I think pitching is good on Zoom. I don't like that. Really, I prefer it to doing it in person. I'll do it on Zoom. We all do now. I think pitching is good on Zoom. I don't like that. I don't like that. Really, I prefer it to doing it in person. I've done so many Zoom pitches this year. So have I, bitch. And no, none of them worked.

None of mine have either. Yeah, none of mine did either because I think- But I like the experience. But no one's buying it either. No one's buying it either. But I think it's flat. Like, I think it's just like- It feels flat to me.

I can't make my, like, off the cuff jokes because, like, I'm like, did anyone even hear that? I still make them and I'm great at it, but it's just like, I can't make my like off the cuff jokes because like I'm like, did anyone hear that? I still make them and I'm great at it. Well, okay. But I feel like it's like people aren't even seeing my face because they're looking at like whatever you've pulled up on the screen and then it'll just feels like bad. I think there's a way to do it though, that you can maximize the Xoom experience for the

pitch. You know what the problem for me is? Mine were at the beginning, which I also... The people I'm pitching to are... Yeah, the people have not figured it out. The people I'm pitching to mute themselves so you don't get a reaction if you ever make an off-the-cuff joke.

Like, you make a funny joke. Maybe that's why everything didn't work. You make a funny joke and then you feel like, well, that just fucking fell flat. And then, like, you look... Because these are people that laugh without smiling. Yes. No, you like... Well, but no, you have a deck up in the main screen

and so you make a joke. A deck is a document that shows what your show is about. What you're talking about. It's short for document. By the way, my shorts are writing up like I'm an NBA player in the 70s right now. Okay, I'm married. It's actually perverted and I am as well.

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I have another surprise for you. Oh, hell yeah. What do we got? Nothing. Okay. We just had, we just celebrated April Fool's a few weeks ago. Yeah. So I thought that would. Yeah, so I mean more recently But yeah more recently, but we also we just celebrated Groundhog's Day a

Few months ago. Are you the guy Paul? Who hates April Fool's? Emma I was when when it was April 1st the other day I was like, I think I remember Paul talking about how stupid you know what? I've always hated when people would post something on April Fool's Day that's like awesome? I just did this! I remember someone doing like, I got casted us and all on April Fool's Day and then everyone's like congrats and they're like, April Fool's Day, that just sucks for you. That's a sad April Fool's Day.

My life actually sucks. We're engaged, April Fool's,. I don't know. My life actually sucks. Or like, we're engaged. Something good happened to me. April Fool's is, I hate those. That's like so not funny. It's only sad to the person, I think. Yeah. I don't like the fake news stories. Although- Oh, no, that I like. I don't know, like-

They're finally being honest. Like, Paddington tweeted on April Fool's Day, I don't like marmalade anymore. But he doesn't like marmalade anymore. That's cute. No, that's what I'm talking about. Cute, that's a good one. It's cute, but speaking of pranks, I sent you guys the funniest prank

I've seen in a long time. You did? It was an Instagram story from Gordon Ramsay. Oh, yeah. His daughter pranked him so hard. It is so funny. So what it is, and I watched it over. I watched it over. it's so cold.

So what you do is I would bring Scott over to my kitchen table and I say, now please watch what I'm gonna do with this bottle of water. I have a magic trick. Magic trick with my bottle of water. I'm gonna put this egg into this bottle of water with, and then basically what you do is... You palm the egg.

Palm the egg. Pretend to put it in. And while the person peers into the bottle... The person looks into the bottle, you squeeze the... the person looks into the bottle, you squeeze the bottle, I want to also sell it. And then the water squirts to their face and while they're confused about that you smash the egg on their head. And they're just like what the fuck? And what makes it better is Gordon Ramsay laughs like it's the funniest thing like yes Well, he has no choice like no I mean in a good way like you really fucking got me. Yeah, yeah gives it up

Yeah, he gives it up. He doesn't get like oh god. I'm gonna get you, but you know how some of the color a donkey Don't get I do feel like you know how some people when you pull a prank on him They then have to status you and be like, oh, I'm gonna get you or I'm gonna, man, you know? Like, I'm gonna prove that I still am higher status than you. Just accept your status. He was laughing. He was good, but he must really love his daughter.

He was laughing so hard at it. It was the funniest prank. We used to prank, in my family, we used to do April Fool's pranks I'm remembering now. And- Really? Yeah, and there was one that my mom did to my grandpa where she put Saranup on the toilet.

And then the pee goes everywhere. The pee goes simply everywhere. But where does the dookie go? Well, hopefully you see it if you're gonna go dookie. I think you'll also feel it. Hopefully. What if you have diarrhea? Like, do you call- Oh my God. Do you call Grandma Anne and go- Sat on that and-

And go, okay, you did this, you clean it up. I'll see you guys later. That would be so exciting. That's what I'm saying is you clean it up? I'll see you guys later. That would be so exciting That's what I'm saying is you would say that I'll see you guys later You sit on the toilet you don't see this round your diarrhea spills all over the sides I can't remember what song I was singing you hated so much It was, it was, I'm never gonna poo again. But what is the lyric? I'm never gonna poo again. Oh yeah, yeah.

I'm never gonna poop again. But now I thought it was, I'm never gonna poop again. Never gonna poop again. Why did you bring up John Mayer in the last episode? Because that was the concert I wanted to go to. Oh, right. I went to see Dispatch, but I really wanted to go to. Oh, right. I went to see Dispatch, but I really wanted to see John Mayer. Would you tell me the truth?

John Mayer, he loves the ladies, from what I've been told. Yeah. By us weekly, not by anyone who knows him. I know, I heard he's got a KKK dick. I saw he was on Raya and he's just there just for friends. Sure. That's sad. if he before before A lot of people say you're unattached you're here in LA when I have had sex with John Mayer

If he asked you out would you marry him? I would absolutely have gone out with John Mayer. Yeah. Yeah, what am I insane? Is it I saw him the other day? He's got a real Johnny Depp thing. He's really good looking. I mean Johnny Depp now. He's friends with a friend of mine. I actually saw him before. Yes, that's what he looks like now. I was at an event with him,

but I did not, I could not bring myself to talk to him because I was like, it's still not the right way to meet. You know, it's like, I can't just go approaching him because he's John Mayer. Yeah, like, hey, you're John Mayer. I don't feel any of the same thing now. I mean, obviously that was like 20 years ago that I was like, whatever, but I still like his music.

Did you move to LA in hopes of meeting him? You know what I think, you know what I have thought? It is weird when you, and I'm sure you have this about people, where you knew some, you know, he was famous before I could ever have met him in my life. And so I've known of him for a long time. And then suddenly you're just in the same room as them and you're like, oh, so I could have actually ended up marrying him.

Like, I mean, like, if, you know, we have mutual friends. Like, so, and he's like, that's a crazy thing. If, like, he were to date an asshole once. Me? Yeah. If you like lower the standards one. Well, obviously, he's with like Jennifer Aniston. I'm not saying that, but I'm just saying you could meet the person.

You could have a connection. Yeah, that is possible. It's not just an insane because when I was in high school, I thought I could marry him is my point. Right. And then it's like you get to a place where you're like, I actually have met this person enough times that not even about him Yeah, got married yeah Like that I just remember when I was doing best week ever that we were doing this there was some story about Jennifer Aniston and I Introduced to my saying Jennifer An, the world's saddest woman.

We thought that was so funny at the time. I always thought it was so insane how magazines have, how tabloids have spun her life. I'm like, she's thriving at all times. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can't. It is funny, somebody pointed out how dry she is. She does these commercials for her.

She needs water, lotion. Her eyes are dry. She does have dry eyes. funny somebody pointed out how dry she is she does these commercials her eyes are dry go jump in the ocean go jump in the ocean you know what you know I'm realizing they're like I'm listening to smartless which I've mentioned on this show mm-hmm and they mentioned her a lot as a casual friend like oh we were at Jen's house and then I'm like, okay, then I saw that, what's his name, Justin, or Jason Bateman was at her home for the, whatever award show, Golden Globes or something.

Yeah, one of those. He was at her house to do his Zoom presenting or whatever. And I was like, why is he at her house? He has a nice house, I'm sure. But then they're all hanging out together, they're all close friends. So then I'm just very curious about the friend circle with everyone going to Jennifer Aniston's house

for parties all the time. Maybe they all have kids who are in the same pod or something? But she doesn't have kids. Well, that adds a wrinkle to it, definitely. That's kind of what I'm saying. Like she's just having people over and I think it sounds fun, but I'm just, I like- How do we get in there?

Like the three of us are cool, right? Yeah, we're awesome. So why don't we go over to Jan Aniston's house? Hello, we're awesome. We're great, right? No, we're great. That does not seem like a group that I would wanna hang out with.

Oh my God. What? Yeah, I don't know. I disagree. That I do wanna hang out with? Yes. I think you really do. I think you really do.

But you know who is the funniest is Will Arnett. I have not known this. I used to have a really good time. I used to sit next to Will Arnett for the BoJack table reads every week. Oh yeah, you worked with him. And we had very like bad kids in class energy. I love that.

It was fun. I really looked forward to it. He has the funniest like digs. Like I I just I have not known him from anything. The one day he was on bang bang he came on and just is like funny 100% of the time off stage as well you know it's the same with Will Ferrell where like I got on a phone call about the Ferns movie with him and like he and Zach is real when you're talking to him on the phone. Will Ferrell doing the most hilarious bits for a half an hour on a phone call while still doing business like still talking about the front. I also think Zach is funny when he's being normal. Yeah yeah. But that's also just a curse I think when you're like really funny. It's so crazy. Yeah it is.

It's so crazy to me to see someone like Arnett or whoever who is just like that funny for that long. Like the amount of times he'll catch me off guard on that podcast and I'm like, I'm so surprised. But I'm like, I clearly have been in the dark on him because I don't watch all his stuff. But I'm like, oh, I can see how he and Amy Poehler were a great match.

Oh, how? For a match. Oh, hell. For a time. For a time. She must have thought he was funny. Who would you like to be friends with, Paul? She must have thought he was funny. What celebrity do you want to be friends with? The Dame Judi Dench, darling.

That would be fun. That would be fun. Did you ever see Tea with the Dames? T-Rex with who? Oh my God. With Lauren? No, I never saw that, but I did. I want to see that.

Isn't that why they just have tea and hang out? The dames are Dame Judi Dench, Dame Eileen Atkinson, Dame Maggie Smith, and Dame Joan Plowright. And they are all actors. They are long lived people. They sit around and they fucking tell stories and it is great. But see, this is the thing about, about celebrities

that you want to be friends with or whatever. You really don't know what people are like at all. But see, this is the thing about celebrities that you want to be friends with or whatever. You really don't know what people are like at all. And like, I think there's people that I've worked with where I end up being their friend, and I'm so surprised. And then there's people that I think I'd be friends with who I just don't have a vibe with at all. I will say that older actors are fun to hang out with. Yeah. And if you can add alcohol to that, it's even better. Yeah, I like when they tell stories about theater people. I love theater people. When they start telling stories, it's really fun. Movie people who have not done theater are not as fun. I think.

That's it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I also think when people are, it's harder when they're just a, right, there's an actor who had never had to do comedy. Because I feel like coming up in that way, you like have to be personable in a certain way. And some actors are in their own world so much that you just, they really are amazing on screen. And when you're working in the scene, they're amazing. And then off, they're kind of like not giving you anything.

Lauren, who do you wish you were friends with in the babysitting world? Are there any famous babysitters? and then off, they're kind of like not giving you anything. Lauren, who do you wish you were friends with in the babysitting world? Are there any famous babysitters? Oh, the babysitter's quote. You know what I did see though? Jessica St. Clair posted her babysitter who I am acquaintances with only on Instagram,

Sydney Steinberg. I don't, I wondered if she'd ever been on Comedy Bang Bang because she's funny. I don't know her personally. We just ever been on Comedy Bang Bang because she's funny. I don't know her personally, we just like follow each other because Mike knows them, but I, she's Jessica's nanny and she was like, she dressed up as the Easter pig to go, like the Easter pig fairy or something

to like show up the other day for work with like a pig snout and be really funny. And I was like, that's the best. I love that. I think that's so funny and so fun. And like just the kind of thing a kid would really funny. And I was like, that's the best. I love that. I think that's so funny and so fun. And like just the kind of thing a kid would really remember. Absolutely. I just thought that was sweet.

Sweet. And I just think when you hire a babysitter, if you can get someone who's like fucking hilarious, that's like amazing. Who's the most famous babysitter of all time? Nanny McPhee? Probably. Mary Poppins? Yeah, yeah,Phee? Probably. Mary Poppins?

Yeah, you gotta give it up to Poppins. Nanny McPhee is just an ugly Mary Poppins, right? Yeah, I think so. Uglier. Yeah, they're Poppins. She never did it for me. Who do you want to be friends with, Scott? I would say the... Okay, like, on a real level? Can I say that being, like,

the idea of being friends with them is impossible to sort of predict. I don't mean that I- But like, who would you like to, like, if you could go to a dinner party and hang out with somebody? I haven't even committed to mine. I was just talking about how I liked that podcast.

The one I was gonna say is someone, I was gonna take it the other way. I'm not trying to nail you down. I'm not trying to befriend anybody. I was gonna take it the other way of like all the people who cycled. Who you want to be enemies with. Cycled through the bang bang couch of like who is a famous person that I was like, wow, this person and I feel like I like this person.

Kindred spirits. I like this person genuinely where I was like, if I ever hung out with this person, I would be friends with them and it was was Paul F. Tompkins. Wow. And it worked out. No, I think like Seth Rogen. I was like, wow, this guy's so cool. Oh yeah, I talked to him a couple of times

and he was so cool. If I ever see him, it's like, hey, how's it going? But we're not friends or whatever. But I was like, this guy's really nice. He seems very normal. Yeah, very normal guy. I was just like- I'm also extremely interested in his weed line.

Yeah, I'm interested in doing something to it. What? Smorting it? I want to snort that weed. I do want him to send me some. Seth, send us some weed to snort. Send us some weed. We'll talk about crocs. We'll talk about M&Ms and your weed.

The products are so nice looking. And I thought it was fun how he made this line because he was like, people who smoke weed don't get anything cool like people who drink alcohol there's so many accessories if you drink alcohol. That's true. What are the accessories when you drink alcohol? You mean like a flask? You can buy like pretty glasses and giant ice cube makers. Yeah that's true like when you buy pot it's not in a big like glass skull. It always looks stupid. There are more companies making like pretty like sort of like subscription boxes and things like that.

But his stuff is like looks cool on your table. The descent of your headphones is. I know I know. Headphones descent. They're slowly leaving my body. Now it's like you're talking on an old phone. Hello. Hello.

Have you seen Seth Rogen's weed lighters? Yeah. They're on the sides of a table. I've said this before, that's the one thing I miss about smoking is the accessories. I used to have all that shit. Yeah. I had fancy lighters, I had cigarette cases, I had nice ashtrays. Yeah. Yeah, he made cool ashtrays. Well, he makes pottery. How cool is that?

Oh, that's true, he does make pottery. They're all based on his designs. I think that's nice. I think he should be selling his pottery and little boutiques around LA And I would buy it Seth come on three of them and talk about your It's not because it's you we just want a weed pottery guy we We've been looking to fill this role. We'll take any of them. So who do you want to be friends with? Yeah, Paul.

Paul Rubens. Are you already friends with him? Who, me? Yeah. I'm no Paul. Yeah. I went on an audition once where he was there. It was a bunch of, Leslie Jordan was there.

It was quite a collection of people. Interesting. And it was like a lot of- Leslie Uggums? It was like a, it was like- You were against, you were going for the same role. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's interesting. do you remember Carol Burnett was gonna do a sitcom again? Mary was on it. Yeah, I know I went to the table

She got cast first and I was like this would be a dream if I got cast It was so fun to see oh I cried At the taping because it was such a wonderful because Carol Burnett came out and it was fucking amazing She pulled Mary Mary was on the stage with her, and I was like, this is so cool. I got to see a friend of mine used to work on Watch What Happens Live, and I happened to be in New York when, squirrel, when Carol Burnett was going to be on.

And my friend said, do you want to come to the taping? Because a lot of people don't know that there is a secret little audience at that show. Right. At the Carol Burnett show? No, at Watch What Happens Live. Oh yes. So Carol Burnett was the guest.

And they have to be so quiet. I did too. I was also a guest on Watch What Happens Live just for the record. I have never been asked because I've never done anything of note. Well, you aren't really into reality recap. Um.

Yes, I am. We do reality recap. You and I. So I was very- I was trying to help you feel better about it. It was very exciting to see Carol Burnett, when my friend knew that Carol Burnett meant a lot to me, and to watch her be interviewed, like, so close. That's so cool.

But then, Andy Cohen's fucking dog bit her. Oh my god, I think I remember that. That was a big thing. I think they showed it. He's got his dumb dog wandering around there. No, I know. I think he got rid of that dog. I hope they destroyed it. Not got rid of it. I hope they destroyed it.

He passed it on to another home. He paid it forward. He re-homed. To a shelter. Because he had a baby, and then it was like, this dog is unpredictable. Then the baby bit Carol Burnett. Yeah, well, that was cute. It was cute, but it did break the skin. But you know, that Carol Burnett show didn't get picked up,

and I was like, what do you people want? I know. Did you see that? Everyone in America wants to see Carol Burnett again. And she's being funny. Do you see the Carol Burnett, the documentary about the play she was in? It's really fascinating. This sounds familiar.

I haven't seen it, but I- A documentary about a play? Maybe I've talked about it. I remember hearing about this. So she's cast in this play and she's like cast, it's a documentary about putting this play up on its feet. And they cast Carol Burnett because she's a name, but as I recall the movie, the producers never really liked Carol Burnett.

Never really... How on earth? Like only cast her because she was a name and was kind of resistant to her. I'm honestly confused. I feel like I read about this in something else. And wouldn't let her do like things she wanted to do in the play and stuff like that

But then open and they're they're treating her like shit. I think yeah, and then opening night The power goes out In the play and they're like and the producers are like, what do we do? What do we do? And they say Carol will you go out and entertain them? My god, and she goes out and basically just fields questions for an hour. Which everyone probably thought was better than the play. Yes. Waiting for the lights to come back on and she's like saves the whole experience and

they're like, Carol, thank you so much. And it's just like you were treating her like shit before this. I can't believe someone would treat her like shit. I just think like she's not even known for being like a mean person or anything. No, she was totally nice and kind of like, well, I'm trying to give you guys some... I think they look down on her

because she wasn't from the theater. Yeah, that's what it seemed like to me. And they're like, oh, we have to cast this name or what? And she is from the theater. She was in Once Upon a Matrix. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, so... Also, yeah, she's like totally theatrical.

I wish I could remember what that was called. I'll look it up during the break But it's a really it's a really fascinating movie if you're interested in like putting together, you know theater types of movies I don't know what types of movies Together topsy-turvy. Yes, if you look to put together theater types of movies I wish they would put together one for Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark. Oh, that would be amazing. Oh, I would love to do a fictional movie. Not of that story, Spider-Man Turn Off the Dark, but of the making of. Yes, I would love an oral history of that.

Oh, there is a book that the co-writer wrote. Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh. It's fascinating. And he spills the entire tea to a point where I'm like, oh, this guy is so full. This guy spills the entire tea. I was like,'m like, Oh, this guy is so full. This guy is the entire tea. I was like, this guy's ruined his career. Essentially, that sounds like a must read.

It's pretty fascinating their career with a book. You got to read that book. That's good book. We got to take a break. We'll be right back. All right, everyone, we're back and it's now time for what we call Three Chirs. This is a part of the show where we do a game. This was submitted by at Meisel Mostar. And it's called One Noise Impressions. called one noise impressions. One noise impressions. Players take turns making one noise or sound

and the other players have to guess who or what they're imitating. So not even words. Yeah. Who or what? I'm imitating my knife. On a monopoeia or just like, you know? Well, like let's come up with an example.

Okay. Is there an example list? Like, no, but if I was like. If you're gonna send us three each, just list an example. Okay. Is there an example listed? Like, no. But if I was like... If you're gonna send us three-chars, listen. Example. You gotta hold our hands. We're dumb. We're dumb people.

If I was like... A bird? No. We're playing now, by the way. Goldie Hawn. No. It's funny. Thank you.

Okay, now you gotta do another another noise because we both guess. Roger Rabbit. No. Who played Roger Rabbit? Charles Fleischer. Who framed? Oh, who framed? Oh. It's Roger Rabbit.

Jennifer Garner. Jennifer Aniston. No. Jennifer Connolly. No, Jenn Garner. Jennifer Aniston. No. Jennifer Connelly. No Jennifers. No Jennifers. None taken. Scott was close with his first guess.

Who did I guess? It was, I don't even remember. I don't remember either. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Damn it. You went, oh, I said a bird. Yeah.

A truck. No. A truck. No. A famous bird. Chilly Willie, the penguin. No. Big bird. No, it's not a bird. Why did you say it was close with a bird?

Because you're closer to that than Jennifer Connelly. You're close. But it's not a bird. Elmo. Someone with a bird name? No. Tweet Quackenbush. I'm tired.

Ooh! Elephant. Yes! Just an elephant? Yes! It could be anything. Why didn't you make an elephant sound? Because I was doing a sound,

and it was just, that was what it was. This is not good. This is not good. Oh, please, try it. You try it. No, I think we need to do it again, like don't, I think we need to do it again like last week. I think we need to narrow the parameters. It should be a famous person.

Fine, it's a person. Let me do it again. It's a person. Okay, famous person. Give up so fast. Famous person. Alright. Okay.

Here, I'm gonna do another one. Here's a famous person. Here's a famous person. Okay. Nah. Peter Falk. No. Here's a famous person. Here's a famous person. OK. Yeah. Peter Falk. No.

She, by the way, I'm going to do she physically. Yeah. Robert De Niro. No. Oh, a little mouth. It's so specific. It's like a little puppet mouth. Yeah.

I gotta say, yeah. Can I say a hint? Yeah. It's not a man. Whoa. I know, because that would have gone on forever. Do it again. This is not good.

Yes it is. There is no clue. Okay, this person is currently on television on NBC and it's a woman. Brian Williams. Oh. Will you do that? I want to get the captured the face on video.

Okay. You zoomed in? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So go to our Instagram. Come on. Freedom USA and watch her doing this face.

Come on. So she's on NBC currently. Yes. On a drama or on a comedy? Comedy. With someone we know. Jesus. I don't watch network television.

I feel like I'm not aware of what's on television anymore. All right. Do you want to tell me what show she's on? Yeah. Yeah. Mr. Mayor. I don't know anyone on that show other than Bobby Moynihan. Yeah, you know him. So I'm saying she was on a show with someone we know,

who is Bobby. Oh. And this person is not someone we know. She was on SNL? Yeah. No. With Bob, well, what other show was it? No, she was on Mr. Mayor.

I'm saying you were like, what show? And I was like, it's a show on NBC with someone we know. Bobby, Mr. Mayor. That's the show. She's on it. She's on it. Well, I don't know who's on Mr. Mayor. Well, it would narrow it down significantly if you did.

True. I can't argue with that. What about Mayor Mr.? She also was in a lot of films. She was in a lot of movies, especially in the 80s and 90s. Sigourney Weaver. No, but you're on the right track.

Nah. Piper Laurie. She's in- 80s and 90s. Sigourney Weaver. No, but you're on the right track. Nah. Piper Laurie. She's in- Piper Laurie. She's in a lot of stuff. People love her. She won an Oscar. Dorothy Dandridge.

She won an Oscar. For a role where she didn't make a noise. Oh, Marlee Hunter. No. Yes. Oh, Holly Hunter. Now I get the face. Thank you.

Now I get the face. Oh, I get it, cause she's like. Yeah. Exactly. Man. Now someone else go. Is this fun? It is, if you keep playing it.

It actually is fun. Okay. It actually is fun. All right, Paul, do you want to go? No, you go. Okay. Let me think of someone. Now I'm only thinking of people

that people do famous impressions of. Okay, got it. Ooh. Ben Stiller. No. The Rock. You don't get another guess until Paul. Robert De Niro.

No. You're famous for just, you just keep going. I know, cause I wanna know. The Rock. Let me try to do it. The Rock. What noise do you want me to make? Do this person making noise?

Beep. Beep? Okay, here we go. Beep. Alec Baldwin. Yes. Wow. Okay. Paul.

All right. Was it the physicality of it? The physicality really helped, I gotta say. Okay, great. All right. It was about was it the physicality of it? The physicality really helped. I got to say. OK, great. Beep. All right. I have one. Give me give me the noise. Poof. Poof. Yeah. A poof. Christopher Walken. Bruce.

Dern. Interesting. I like that guess. Yeah, that's a good guess. Thank you. Say, okay, now say Zoom. Zoom. I'm enjoying it. I have no idea. It's weirdly fun.

Zoom. Harvey Keitel. Poof. Are you on television or film? Television. And some film, mostly television. Are you on like CSI? No. Have you ever said poof in real life or on camera?

I think I was on a CSI at one point. Oh. Okay. Not David Caruso. Zoom. Ted Danson? Yes. Oh.

You're also on Mr. Mayor. That's right. With Bobby. Whom we know. And Ollie Hunter. And Ollie Hunter. We do know. May. May. Okay. We do know. Meh.

Meh. Okay. Give me a word. Um, how about... Ding. Yeah, ding. What's that play is? Ding.

Okay, she took off her glasses, put them on her forehead, and she's nodding up and down. Ding. Looks like a guy to me. Is that right? No, it's a girl? Ding. down. Ding. Looks like a guy to me. Is that right? No, it's a girl. Ding. Ding. Ding.

I think I've done this one. Jennifer Aniston. Ding. What? This is good, but I don't know. I don't know what just happened. Is this fun to listen to someone saying ding? No.

It's a fun word. It is, I like it. Yeah. Ding. Ding. Is it a reality person? Another word, no. Okay, is it a television person?

All right, how about a word? Boom. Boom. Boom. Courtney Cox are kept. No. Boom, there she was. Boom.

Boom. Is it the nanny? No. Boom! There she was! Boom! Boom! Um, is it the nanny? No. Um, I don't know! I feel like we're also- You know this person. I know this person personally? In life?

Yeah. Holy shit. Chelsea Peretti. No. Give me another word. Who do I even know? Um, how about whoomp? Like, whoomp there it is. Whoomp! It's very specific. Yeah, give me another word. Who do I even know? How about whoomp? Like whoomp there it is. Whoomp!

It's very specific. Yeah, it is very specific. The problem is for the listener, the physicality is very key to these impressions. Key, it doesn't help at all. P doesn't? What? Key, it doesn't help at all. Yes.

No, it does help. I think the physicality helps. But it doesn't help the listener. That's the problem. That's problem we're just hearing you say whoop and Man, okay, this person has had a television show They are awesome, and we know him personally. Yeah, they are lucky a comedian

Sarah Silverman yes Okay, now does it make sense now does it make sense to your your then say we'll do something like won't You know, maybe something like wall you sound like that talking around the noise Yeah, I don't think that really is how the game works. Well, I gotta get into it. I gotta ramp into it Well, that's illegal. That's illegal. It's illegal to ramp into it. Okay, who's turn is it? Mine okay, let me think of a person It's illegal to ramp into it. Okay, whose turn is it? Um, mine? Okay. Let me think of a person... Okay.

Give me a noise. Click. Click! So you're kind of like surprised and smiling? Uh-huh, surprised and smiling. Okay, I'm gonna do it again. Click! Um, are you... This guy's so happy about Click!

Are you... Man or a woman? Man. Man. Manly man. I'm all man. 100% man. Say...

Say... Bazinga. Bazinga? Um, oh my god, who are you? 100% Matt. Say Bazinga. Ah! Bazinga? Oh my God, who are you? We know them. We know them? Oh my God, who are you?

Jon Hamm. No, Jon Hamm would be Bazinga. Yeah, but when he's doing comedy, he'd be like, Bazinga? Bazinga? Jack McBrayer. No, that'd be Bazinga.

You can go to the pool. All I want is for somebody to just jump in. Why don't you do it? Because I don't want to. Final episode, we'll all jump in. OK. Give me another noise. Clank. Clank.

Oh, he's warming into it. I know, I know. What is happening? Who is this? You're a man. You have a TV show. I'm on TV shows. I don't have my own TV show. And you are someone we know. Yes.

Are you currently on TV? Yes. Do it again. Adam Pally. Close. Are you currently on TV? Yes. Do it again. Adam Pally. Close. Give me another noise. Jesus. Just do the last noise again.

Jesus. That sounds like Dungeon and Travolta. Zach Woods? No. Jesus. Ah, I don't know. I can't do it with Jesus. St. Paul? You're very close with one of those words.

Paul Rust? Not that Paul. Paul Rudd. Not that Paul. Paul Lind. Not that Paul. Paul. Not that Paul.

Click. Click. Do you know another Paul? It's not me. You know Paul's. Hey, hey guys. Hey everybody. Click. Paul? Hey guys. Everybody. Quick.

Paul. Yeah, Paul Shear. Oh my God. Hey guys. Quick. I can see it now. Quick. I can see it now. All right, give me a noise. Bop. Bop. I mean, that's

it sounds like Pacino, but it's not. It's not. You were Bob Garland. No, the guesses are the funnest part. Yeah. Bob Bob. Who could this be? I don't know. Bob.

No, that's not. No, just count that one. Okay. Bob. Nope. Nope., that's not, no. Discount that one. Okay. Bop. Nope. Nope, strike that bop. Bop. I know.

Okay, so you're like, you're like, are you live? Yes, very much so. You on TV right now? No, I don't think right now. Have you ever said bop? Probably. Are you an older man? No. Oh, okay,'t think right now. Have you ever said bop? Probably. Are you an older man?

No. Oh, okay, you do it again. She's young, okay. Bop! Bop. Bop. So you're a young man who gets who has a gravelly voice who says bop. Well, he doesn't say bop.

Well, not known for saying bop, but... He says it all the time? He says it. According to you. I misunderstood the point of this game he's saying Bob one of those people for saying these noises say another say another noise say say gually yeah that's a noise everyone's heard what is it again gually gually Who is that? Is it Vinny Chase?

No, it's not a fictitious person, it's a real person. Turtle? Sorry. Sorry to who, Vinny Chase? Turtle real? Turtle's very real. Turtle is real. Turtle's very real.

Working with ballers. I went to audition with Turtle once. For him or with him? With him, he also was auditioning. You drove together? Yeah, we arrived at the same time and waited and then auditioned separately. Interesting.

Give me another noise. Oink. Piss. Piss oink. Pfft. Piss. Oink. Oink piss. Oink, oink piss.

He won't do it. Oink piss. I don't do it. Oink piss. I don't know. Who is it? So quick and sane. Is it ringing any bells at all? I said all the bells. Yeah, probably, but give us a hint.

It's someone you know. Oh my god. Oink piss. Who says oink piss? Oink piss. Oink piss? Who says oink piss? Oink piss. Oink piss. Who do I know? Who do we know who says oink piss? Who do I know?

Who do we know who says oink piss? Look through your phones. There's no rule against it. Do you think I have their number? I bet you do. It's not Manzougas is it? Yes it is. Whoa! Oink piss? I bet you do it's not manzoukas is it yes it is Okay, oh, yes, yeah, come on Yeah, I thought that was the key

Yeah, that's good. Okay. That was good. Wow Done it once more. I hope you enjoyed us saying oink piss and boop Enjoyed click You enjoyed us saying oink piss and boop. I hope you enjoyed click. Thanks for listening, everybody. Thanks for listening. We did it again. We hope everybody's doing OK now that things are maybe there's light at the end of the tunnel. Look, enjoy the rest of your Thursday, too. You know what? Yes. You enjoy the rest of your Thursday.

And and hell, if you're listening to this on a Friday. TGIF. Yeah, but GTFO as well. Motherfucker. TGIF and GTFO. LMAFO. What if ABC started a GTFO night? They should. They should. GTFO.

What are you doing, Lauren? Now you are truly... I'm spinning. Lauren has the headphones up too. Lauren's got a weird helmet on. I'm just... I can't take it anymore. Anything you want to say one last thing to the fans? I... I need you. See you next week. Bye.