Threedom - Threevisiting: The Threedom Challenge

Episode Date: August 15, 2023

Threevisiting on the Tues: Scott, Paul and Lauren discuss hosting a candy party, proposals and play Switch It and Pitch It. Follow us on social media @threedomusa. Send Threetures and emails to [e-mail]. Leave us a voicemail at 424-252-4678 (HAG-CLAIMS-8).

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Okay, I got it. Not to get all political, but you know. You gotta do it. How every president, every single president has. It's good. Except for this one. No, but every president, like, there are a million people doing impressions of the president.

And this one, it's, he's so repulsive that people can't even bring themselves to do impressions. I know. Like, you know what I mean? Gross. Like, when George W. Bush, as much of a monster as he was, everyone out there was, was out there going,

you know, what did he do? Not gonna do it out there going, you know, what did he do? Not gonna do it, but George W. Bush, what did he do? He was like... The earth is flat. But it's not even fun to do a Trump impression. Anyway, welcome to the show. No, I don't want to think about his dumb butt. You're turning off 50% of the audience right now. No way. No way. I would be shocked if anyone who voted for Trump follows this pot No, I think they do I just think that that people who vote they exaggerate they exaggerate like 50% of the country love it

It's my favorite thing would be we'll threaten you like that like okay, I mean you're gonna lose your audience Have you watched when they see us on Netflix? Yes, that's boring. It's, you're so lame. It's not? You're so lame, this is not a documentary. It's a Dr. Drama. It's really good.

It's about the Central Park five. Yeah, right. And I watched one and a half episodes, or whatever, parts. But it was so. We watched it all on one day. It's brutal. I started watching history, but I didn't get to finish it.

What they did to the person? Oh my god. I started watching a street, but I didn't get to finish it. What they did to the person. Oh my God. No, but just the first part, it's so, I mean, of course, I know the story, but not that well, but watching it and then seeing the way in which these people clearly didn't do this, but then the detectives also know they didn't do it, but then they're cursing them and also straight up

just like lying to make it seem like it's true. Yeah. It's so horrible. I can't even imagine. That's like everyone's worst nightmare to be falsely accused of a crime. Did you used to have a lot of worries about going to prison eventually? I used to. Like being in the army and going to prison, those were my two biggest.

Because I think that the movies, first of all in the 80s, there were a ton of movies where people went to boot camp and didn't want to be there. And so I was always thinking about that, like being in boot camp and having a drill sergeant yelling at me. But also, there's a ton of movies where like people go to prison for whatever reason. And so I just grew up thinking, I think I'm at a point where I don't think I'm going to prison in my life. Yeah, but it could be in half a minute. It could, yeah, that's the thing. It could be some weird accident where I don't think I'm going to prison in my life. Yeah, but it could be an accident. It could, yeah, that's the thing. It could be some weird accident where I'm just like, well, I'm going to prison for three

years. Goodbye. I'm watching Oz when it was first on HBO and I watched I think like a good three seasons of it before I realized it was pointless. I don't like, well, why am I watching this? This is not fun. It's not entertaining to me. Did we talk about Oz or is this on Rea's by TV? But what is the premise? It's someone

who goes to jail who's falsely accused. No, it's not falsely accused. No one's falsely accused. He's on the humble show about a bunch of people in prison. But, but may it's not familiar? It kind of goes through the dude from Wayne's world who Yeah, wing Who we go to prison it's like earnest goes to jail. No, but he's like he's in there for a drunk driving Okay, so then then he has scary Oscar winner Jackie Simmons JK Simmons like tattoos And then he has, That's scary. Oscar winner, Jake H Simmons.

Jake H Simmons, like Tattoo's, his name on his ass or something. I think it's Waster. He's in the Onazi, he's terrifying it. That's the first time I ever saw him in a video. You mean that M&M is scary? He should give that roll up. That's my opinion.

Was that, that used to be? Marshall Madgers should give M&M. Wasn't John Goomen the the first yellow Eminem? Maybe, but I think if you wouldn't ask her, the Eminem goes to somebody else. Like, let's spread the wealth a little bit. Do you remember Paul back in the 90s when I started comedy and you'd been doing it for a long time?

Um, good luck, you have to be born. But there was talk between us, our group of friends, and one of our friends had supposedly been offered the role of an M&M, and it was a big thing of like, are they going to sell out and do it? Oh, what a lame perspective to judge them for that. But I mean, I remember. I've been at M&M all day every day.

Oh, I know. I'm dressed as one for a week But I don't know that's the freedom challenge We're talking about brand clothing But I remember at the time I didn't know anything about comedy or whatever and so it was like oh was that not a Thio okay. Yeah, I get I mean, I don't know Billy West is the other one? What other M&M or something? He used to be, he used to be, he used to melt chocolate, dark chocolate peanut butter,

crispy, it was John, John love it, so now it's Billy West. John Goodman was the saying now, it's Jakey Simmons, Simmons. Wow, all these great, Simmons. Oh yeah, and Chris, I'm really excited. Jakey, Cinnamon.

He should have his own company. He should be the Simmons, M&M. MMMMMMMMMMMMMin and emin and emin and emin and emin and emin. Why don't they have a cinnamon emin and em? That sounds good. I feel like cinnamon. Yeah. That should be the channel. Do you like it in the winter exclusively or do you like it all year long? Only in the winter.

Can I tell you something man make a confession? Can you confess? This is his confession. I can't confess. I like the peanut butter emin&M's better than Reese's pieces True peanut butter M&M's are top tier Pt phone your lawyer small candy that goes in your hand now It goes peanut butter goes in your it goes

Can fit in confidant of your hand because I think no, no, it means no matter what you do. Unless you're like, eating it off the floor. You dump it into your hand and then you melt in your mouth. Peanut butter, M&M, and... You really want an M&M's deal. Here's what I want to do. I want to rate them right now, please. Okay.

Peanut butter top. Peanut butter top. You're ranking M&M flavors? M&M flavors. Or candies that fit in the bottom of your head or she's describing her outfit for when she put it on her top. Peanut on top.

Krispy middle. Peanut but it goes peanut butter, peanut. M&M's. On M&M's. No, I don't know what you're doing because you mentioned Reese's Pieces not seconds ago. It goes peanut butter. That's just you ranking candy.

Just Eminem for now. Just to set it on a candy. Peanut is a type of Eminem. You up. I'm just saying that. And then that's what she's talking about. But she mentioned Reese's pieces. She's. All calls, all calls.

She's never been talking about Reese's pieces. She mentioned it. She mentioned it. She's clearly talking about it. Give me a second. Hey, and then I'm fucking sorry. I thank you second. Hey, I'm talking about your fucking side. And thank you. And only fight me if you disagree with my ranking. Now, it goes peanut butter, M&M.

Peanut M&M. Crispy M&M? Crispy plain M&M. Like chicken? Shhh. Yeah, it's breaded. Wait, go back. Peanut butter. Peanut, pretzel, crispy. I don't like the pretzel.

Milk. Wait till she's finished. Milk, dark chocolate mint, almond, or caramel raspberry. They have that many M&Ms. Even have coconut, but it's not listed on the wiki. Coconut. Here's his miranking

It goes Peanut No, it's a number. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, Fuck that dude. Can I finish my record? Can I finish? Can I finish? Can I finish? Buckle leaves. It goes. People usually have so much fun chimitating him. Chicken McLaughlin.

Some buckle-eye. It goes peanut butter. Peanut butter is number one. And then we come down to number two, which is dark and milk chocolate. Dark and milk chocolate? That's right. It's a combo.

It's a combo. Okay. Then it goes. Madavaka. The mint. The mint is number three for you. Yeah, you're following very good. Then it goes plain. Plain. Plain's kind of the best, though, in a weird way. I almost put it at the top. It's reliable. Because plain is what? Plain is like chocolate and then what's inside? It's just chocolate. Then it goes. What? Is just chocolate. Then it goes. What is this question?

I don't know. Then it goes almond. Then it goes female. That's marz is one of them's. In Eminem. Then it goes crystal. Then it goes crispy. For the listener at home, you for my ranking.

I actually want to move Plain from like seventh to first. What a dramatic upset. Plain is bomb. I don't care enough about candy to know what any of these taste like. So you see us go, is M&Ms, is it plain M&M? I just want to try to. I'm trying to. But then what's inside?

No, but the outside. Why should you know that? I know what candy shell. Ryan order sound equipment. Wait. Did see through the booth. He's like, this is never corny. I need to give some new equipment.

This is like, he's on brand right now. This is Scott. What's inside the peanut? No, I know. Oh my god, he got you. And then the other is a chocolate. What the fuck do you think it is? No, the outside is a cappross.

That was my fucking question. What's your favorite candy, you non-candy bitch? I don't have one. You're notandy bitch. I don't have one. You're not kidding. You don't have one? You don't have, are you not fucking 12 anymore? Hey, man. What's your favorite meat?

Okay, comic books. Rebi. Yeah, you boon-n-n-n weirdo. What's your favorite candy, Paul? Oh, no one's ever asked me this before. My favorite candy. What's your favorite chocolate candy? What's your favorite chocolate candy with a favorite candy? You know what? I will probably Reese's Cups or my favorite candy.

Me too. Have you ever had a big cup? Yeah. Have you ever had a Christmas tree cup? Christmas tree cup. I don't like those. Oh, I love those. This is all peanut butter.

I don't like the Christmas. What is it? The Christmas or the Easter ones? Those are the best. It's the same thing. It's one of the things that I've been in the shape of a Christmas tree. Oh, shape of a Christmas tree or the shape of an egg, which basically is a bit of a cut. But it's just peanut butter inside, right?

It's like opening up a jar of peanut butter and just- You don't know? It's like opening up a- Are you from the garden? You're a peanut butter man. Spread it on my penis? Ew, spread it on your butt cheeks and open wide. And then call the doll.

You are. Ha ha ha ha. Oh, I got a stop-do in the show. I'm sorry, you go further. I can't stop doing the show. Okay. I Got You go further Okay And then it's me trying to explain candy's this alien Call me a moron He got the concept of candy right away

But here's my question about M&M's the candy shell, is that chocolate too or is it? Yes. No, if I had, no it's sugar candy. It's candy, it's candy. It's sugar. It's like sugar, it's a crispy sugar shell. It's a crispy sugar shell. But if you were to take all the chocolate out,

yes, would there be chocolate around the outside of the can? Never mind. Well, if you scoop it out of an M&M? No, but I'm saying it's like, it's a white shell with a color on it And then and then you have a chocolate inside But I went by the way I went to Hershey, Pennsylvania because I was fascinated with candy I'm post with a chocolate drop on it

That's how much I love candy as a kid I thought about candy all day long. So what you're saying? We're immature. No, I'm just saying that it has no bearing on my life anymore. You were like a D-dack? All day I dream about candy. Oh, okay. If I, let's see if we're gonna have a candy party. A mediparty. Will you diagnose the D-dack? If we were gonna have a candy party,

and everyone got their favorite, what would you want there? All right, can we first talk about the candy party? Yeah. What happens in the candy party? No, but here's what it is. It's a party. We're like, is it your house? My house why you got a lot of space? Jesus is a pleasing this guy. I find it my house is fine. It's just a cleanup. Oh, well All right, or somebody

Around the border of your I'm also thinking about like at what point do I want to go to bed or people still gonna be there? It's a daytime thing. I really also thinking about like at what point do I want to go to bed or people still going to be there. It's a daytime thing. It's from two to four. Usually take a nap around three. Okay, go ahead. It's from one to three. Freak.

So there's a beautiful hand-made shelf that lines the perimeter of the room made for the party. Made for the party by. I'm going to make it. It's the width of a candy. The width of a candy. Do you mean a candy bar The width of a candy? Do you mean a candy bar?

This is followed by rapidly. It's the width of the whoever, the biggest candy bar. So it's I have to contact every guest just so I know who has the biggest candy bar. It's probably the width of a Charleston chew or the Tobler on you get the airport. And it has to be least as wide as the Reese's peanut butter because that's going to come up a lot. Okay.

So every guest fills out a form on a Google doc and we find out what everyone's favorite is. It's terrible and we all can see it before the party. No, please don't do shit talking on the slack. It's a Google poll, so you can't see what everyone, they fill out their own survey. And then around the border of the room

is each candy bar with a person's name in front of it. And you can run and see what everyone's favorite. Wait, but they can only eat that? No, no, whatever they want. You eat theirs to see what it feels like to be them. And then you fill out a form that says what it feels like. Is it like a white elephant where you all trade candy, trying to get the one that you like?

No, he trade walk around and have a bunch of other person. Yes, all right. All right, no, I'm going to try the melokon. But we don't know what he likes, because he wouldn't say. So what would it be if it was at that party? It's too grown up to say what he can't do. I'm trying to think of a candy.

I like, okay, I, I, I, I, If you went to 7-11, you were like, I went, I have a hanker in for some candy. What would you pick? Very well put. It's very well put. I probably, he's a pilot, saying, I have a weird answer.

He's gonna be like, a hot dog in a condom. Can you really order that? Like I know they sell condoms and hot dogs. I don't like it as a no. If you were to go to 7-11 and say, do you mind, okay, I'm gonna buy this package of condoms, I'm gonna buy this hot dog.

Do you mind putting a condom on the hot dog? I honestly think you can do it. What I would do in that situation? Yeah. I would put the condom on the hot dog. Do you mind putting a condom on the hot dog? I honestly think that you would do it. What I would do in that situation? Yeah. I would put the condom on the hot dog. You're saying, walk up, walk up with the condom package. Right. So they could scan it, you know, the barcode.

It's like you just got the grocery store. I'm buying both of these. I'm buying both of these and show them that there's a condom on it. That's what I would not refer to. I mean, they'd see it. I would show it to you. That's the three'd see it. I would show it to you. That's the three-dom challenge.

I honestly, dare you to do this. Three-dom challenge. Please, please do this. Do not steal either item. You have to have both art and art. So, we need the picture of that, and we need the picture of the receipt. Thank you.

And we need video. But we need both. We need both. We need still photos video. We need someone. I wanted to get it together with music. I wanted scored not, you know, copyright music. I want you to hire a composer. Sand your condom and hot dog receipts to Colin Anderson,

Caravere Wolf. Mm-hmm. And then we will close it. We'll close it. They're all with a postcard or two. Yeah. But I want to see video of people trying to get the clerk to put the condom on the hot dog as well. No, don't bother the. Yeah. This is a no. An identity store. I don't include the clerk to put the condom on the hotdog as well. No, don't bother the. Yeah. This is a no. It's an end not include the clerk. This is enough weirdness to just put it in front of them. The clerk's not like a part of it.

The clerk might even yell at our listener for doing this. Oh, yeah. Like out. Oh, and if you're listening in England, Clark, thank you. Is it called a clerk? They say they pronounce clerk. They pronounce clerk. Clark, okay.

Clark's not gonna weird. And I know Scott's been trying to get away from the answer, but what's your favorite candy? Okay. Okay. It used to be when I was young, I would sit there and dream about candy. And I think I told the story, wanting to buy a package of chocolate chips and dumping it in a tub of whipped cream. And I was like, I know that you know, they're thinking about this all day. I never tell that. Why didn't you do it? I had this dream of riding or driving, my bike to the grocery store and doing this.

Or sailing. But I don't, and it was like the snack that I, because sometimes I would have a peanut butter and chocolate chip sandwich for lunch, and that was great. I used to put chocolate chips in peanut butter. In peanut butter, yeah. I would just put it around. Why would you put it around? I would do it like in the jar and then spoon it out.

Yeah. But I used to like three musketeers a lot. That was like everyone I was exploring. Explanions a lot. Yeah. Thank you. When I was a little Milky Way was the thing. I remember discovering Milky Way and through musketeers because I was always like a snickers peanut butter cup kind of kid. And then I was like, whoa, there's a whole new world out there. I didn't really like not to miss you. I didn't like nuts until maybe recently

So you love them you love nuts and you're always begging. I love them in my mouth. I love these knots What's your kind of nuts? Do you know D Snoop Dogg said that did he not or did you or did you drag beat him to it? I don't actually know that fact. Ryan. He doesn't know either. Why are we asking Ryan?

He's behind glass. He was the opener last time. Who said these nuts? Don't please. Okay. Snoop says it. Yes, Snoop says it. Thank you very much.

I was right about that at least. Ryan was likeop that says. Snoop says it. Yes, Snoop says it. Thank you very much. I was right about that at least. I think Brian was like, these nuts. I have, I'm doing this Treg emoji. I will say I ordered Reese's Pieces at a movie recently and I put it in the popcorn.

Oh, I don't like that. And that was, and that was okay. You don't know about people do that? No, I know that, but that's so 90s. When cool up is born? Yeah. Isn't it 90s to put your dump your candy

bucks into the popcorn? It feels like it's... What's wrong with it? You know what I used to creak? You know what I used to really like is ordering an extra nacho cheese cup from the movies and then dipping my popcorn into that. Ew. That makes a little more sense to me like cheesy popcorn.

What's wrong with cheesy popcorn? Now they sell it for reals. I like that barf. Goody. Barf Goody. I like a sweet and savory combo, but but popcorn is not the like the one for me. Yeah. Like to mix it with chocolate does not, that doesn't do a four.

I went to Universal Studios, the city walk. For fun. For fun. To see Joel. Cool up, and I, because we lived over sort of by there and a nice listener gave her an AMC card where we would get into movies for free. That's a nice listener.

Yeah, we would go there a lot. Because to drive there, you could park there for $5 if you went to see a movie. And so we would go there a lot. And Kasey Wilson would always make tickets cheaper for Cool Up, but she's a child. We would always send a picture to Kasey Wilson of Cool Up having fun at Universal City Walk. And Kasey Wilson of Kool-Up having fun at Universal City

Walk in Kasey would be like, you have to stop going there. Wait, why would you send a picture? Because she made fun of Kool- She couldn't understand why anyone would go to Universal City Walk. But okay, so I went to Universal City Walk and they have a store called Popcornopolis, right? Yeah, where you get gift packages of popcorn, right? And they're like, what?

They're like large, large, like a gift wrap tens of popcorn and stuff like that. And so I bought one for a Christmas thing, my dream, right? And it's a decorative popcorn tin or whatever. They would not let me into the movie with it. Like because they're like no outside food. I'm like, this is a decorative,

this is a Christmas gift. Obviously. No outside food, you fat pig. Yeah. But you're gonna eat this gigantic cow. Um, the outside food thing I was recently told was, just their preference, but they can't really enforce it. Really?

Because they tried to enforce it on me and I had to go throw it away. And it was an expensive, yeah. I go through such lengths. Did you have a popcorn check? Do you have a popcorn checker? Oh, I can't put my popcorn. And then at the end, you're the only box by the end of the Can I Have Your Chicken. It was right there.

Well, we don't know if that's yours. You can be anybody walking in on the street. Walking in on the street. Walking to my mouth. So now you don't eat candy. Well, I don't think to buy it. I don't buy it on the street. I don't, I like it, but I just have never bought it.

What? Like I don't think to buy it. I don't buy it on the TV. I don't, I like it, but I just have never bought it. What? Like I don't think to buy it. I don't buy it at the market or. I understand. When you go to the market. Everyone's, oh, you're gonna have candy on the supermarket store. I'll have a starburst every once in a while

and like a doctor's office. When I go to the grocery, I go to the candy aisle and look for my candy for a week. My coworker, my coworker, her in has like a jar of candy. And if I ever go into her office and sit on the couch, I'll occasionally get a can. But I'm, I can't even remember what candy is in there. Cause maybe she rotates it or something.

I want to have a candy jar. So by one, my dear, you're old enough now. I can't live in a candy jar. Do you have to get permission? No. We can't have candy in the house on a regular basis enough now. I can totally get it. Do you have to get permission? No. We can't have candy in the house on a regular basis because we will fuck just eat it.

That's the thing. I try not to have a lot of it because I will just eat it all night. Like it's crazy. Yeah. But I'll look around Halloween or Christmas and like fucking all bets are off and I can buy a bag of candy.

Oh, you know what I do like? My sister-in-law makes really good candy a Christmas. I'm trying to remember what it tastes like. It's really good. It's really, really good. It's like, you make really good candy or you're trying to remember what it tastes like? Yeah. What is it?

What is it? It's bruised. What does it look like? What kind of candy is it? It's like fruity. It's in a mold. No, it's in a? It's like fruity. It's in a mold. No, it's in a mold. It's fruity is like round.

I'm just trying to remember if it's peanut butter or what flavor it is, but it's so good. It's a rind. Come on. You're trying to remember if it's peanut butter? I can't remember. It's great though. What is up with your brain?

Your brain's dumb. Because my brain doesn't remember candy exclusively. My wife's family. I like it. I like it. I like it. Why? Why? Remember candy exclusively my wife's family Janie's relatives in West Virginia one of her aunts makes this candy that they calls they call it C-phone candy, but it's not C-phone at all has nothing to do with saltwater tap you're anything right? It's actually like a cream candy like a it's very hard to describe you know that texture It's like the texture of butter mint.

Do you remember butter mint? No. It's like a thing that occasionally you find them at a restaurant or something. Like it's a very specific butter. Where's the brown, it's like a cylindrical mint. Yes, it's like a hard candy, but when you bite into it, it becomes very soft and it melts in your mouth.

And it's that consistency. Like these nuts? It's really hard at first. Then I become soft and melts in your mouth. And is that consistency? Like, these nuts? It's gone. They're really hard at first. Then they come soft. Oh, my nuts are so hard. Are you free? Ooh, my nuts are so hard.

I gotta go to the doctor. Oh, god. But maybe my nuts are so hard and free. I just need the ducted abit. And then look, it's soft. I have someone said that. Oh, you're making my nuts so. I need my doctor to bite him. Don't you mean you're dick?

I had a problem. I had to go to the doctor. Oh really? Because here's the thing. In that sack. Sometimes this stuff can get twisted around. Yes. Thank you.

You don't know what's going on. You said it's cool. I finally have testicular cancer. And then you go to the doctor and the doctor's like, no, no, no, here, just let me untie these. You go on titrunch. You go on titrush succuline. Oh, yeah, I think that happened to me once. Testors succuline.

It's very scary. Yeah, yeah. It's very scary. Because you're not so hurt. You're not so hurt. Yeah. One of them is very hard and solid. Yeah, but definitely, I know. I'm pretty sure this happened to me in my 20s, because this is ringing a bell. You're not so hurt. Yeah. One of them is very hard and solid. Yeah.

Nothing I know. I'm pretty sure this happened to me in my 20s, because this is ringing a bell. Yeah, me too. Is that weird for it? I forget that is fascinating. Well, I've wanted my kid. Remember every thing that happens to my nuts?

I don't know. I remember like 90% of the things that happened to my nuts. I feel like you'd be like, I think that happened to me once. It is weird because I think I know everything that's happened to my vagina. Lauren, you can't remember what, if a peanut butter taste.

Yeah, that's crazy. That's crazy. You remember everything that's happened to your vagina? In terms of like medical issues, yeah. I'm gonna know if someone brings something up and go, yeah, that's happened to me. Yeah, a check. know if someone brings them up I'll go yeah, that's happened to me. Yeah, a check. But then you're going, I think maybe my nut got twisted

and got so hard on I had to get medicine. That's so crazy. Eastern fiction check. Yeah, been there done that. Got the t-shirt. I, well look, I was thinking about this this morning. I can't remember, I was trying to remember people that I did that I was't remember ever, I was trying to remember people that I did that I was in theater with.

I was trying to remember the names. You know, I love forgetting people. And I was like, I love it. I get this is 30 years ago. I can't remember this. But I think it's good. To me has always been great. Because I think like my whole life,

I felt like I was very aware. I could remember everyone ever met. I'd go, we met one time and it was right here. And then I'd be like, you know, always, if someone forgot me and say, I remember, I now have no idea who those people are. That's right, I'm happy for it. I did a documentary on my parents and how they met

a few years back. And I remember asking my father about like other women he dated and he couldn't remember their names. And I remember going like, this, he couldn't remember their names and I remember going like this you can't remember their names boy sucks to get old. I don't think I can remember the names of certain the names of people that I dated. I don't think. But there are people when I think about high school when I think about like doing the shows in high school. There are people that I can see and I in my mind I can remember like

vivid exchanges with them and times that we had can't remember their names. But then every once in a while, it'll pop in my head like as we were just talking about it, I was like, I'm not gonna remember people's names like Brad Hebrilie. Like I did. He popped in my head. I was like, oh yeah.

But I think it's like, I don't like when people are very presumptuous about you remembering them. I find that really rude. When people are like, we met, like I've never done that. I've never done that. Because when I go up to someone and go, hey, Scott Aquaman, they go, I know.

It's like, well, I'm trying to save you. Yeah, I've always prefer someone to reintroduce themselves, even if I know. I'm like, I'm pretty sure I know the guy's name and then if he goes, I'm like, thank you. Now there's no part of me that's wondering. Or better yet, if they go, I'm so-and-so, we met during this.

And I'm like, thank God. I used to be insulted by that when I still remembered everyone's name and face. Right, and now if somebody hasn't remembered me, it's fucking fine. Yes. I don't take a person like that. Yeah, Paul F. Tompkins, who could forget you?

You be surprised. Who's the Emmy Academy? Oh. Ah. Poor Paul. Poor Paul. Poor Paul. If they had facial recognition software that you could install into your eyes, would you?

No. Why? I don't want to have something in my eyeball. You have contacts, don't you? What if it feels great? It's installing it into my eye. No, I'm saying like it feels good. It feels good. What if it feels great? Yeah, it feels like a massage all day.

I want it. Like a neck and back massage too. And they're going like that's Kevin, that's Paul, that is Scott. I'm like, I know these people. No, but if it was like Black Mirror, that is Alex. If it was like Black Mirror, where you looked at someone and suddenly like, their stats came up. Their stats came up.

Yeah. And it's like you met doing this. Yeah. Yeah. where you looked at someone and suddenly like, their stats came up, yeah. It's like you met doing this. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be kind of cool, I guess. But everyone, when they always be like blinking weirdly, every time you met anyone. What if you made it so it's not like that? Yeah, I know. No, I feel like you need to blink to dismiss stuff.

Well, you know in that Black Mirror episode where they are like having memories in their eye, I love that one. That's one of the good ones, yeah. They play him back on the TV. Yeah, Tom Cohen's in it. Oh, really? I believe so.

I don't know. I don't know that I know what he looks like. I remember. I remember him. Nice guy. Tatiana. My sky. My wife.

Nice guy. I don't know. I feel like everyone always glosses over how much people would just be like twitching like, you know, something their eyes. For sure. You know like it all works perfectly other than the one person who has the monkey spa or whatever. Oh in the episode it's like their eyes like glaze over right like a like a film comes over their eyes when their what happens in the McAllister episode. Yeah, yeah. Is that what you think, yeah? I guess they reuse that technology.

What technology do you wish that they would invent that has not been invented? Teleportation. Yeah. That's my main one, I think. Would you trust it, though? I'd do it in a second. Like, well, this is what,

I think this is the question I had about self-driving cars with my parents, where I was very surprised. I said to them, like, I don't know, like trusting the self-driving cars and my mom was like, it would be so, our lives would be so much easier. The fact that I, if there's something wrong and I have to go to the hospital, like I have to get your father to drive me and he doesn't have a license, you know, they're just like, if I could just get into a car program and it drives me there, he would be it. I would love it. So well, there probably fewer accidents for the most part because yeah, because yeah, my feeling about it is it has to we have to do it all at once. Well, yeah, everyone has to go to the television thing at the once. Hold on a second Scott. You just love this is

what you do. This is what you wonder you wonder. Oh, you wonder. Oh, he wonders about He wonders about things now. I wonder what kind of candy I'm not. I feel like it has to go to all self-driving cars. Yes. Yeah, I was the board with teleportation. I feel the same way about LASIK where it's like I'll let it go for a while before Yeah, yeah, you don't want to be the first people. No, no, no, I would not it go for a while before I do. Yeah, yeah. You don't want to get a first people. No, no, no, I'm not going to be early on. The teleport to the first guy who's going to do tele, okay, the first guy, whatever,

but the first person who pays for it. Ooh, I can't imagine being that person. They'll probably zap away into nothing that someone never see him again. Well, it's not even possible. Is it teleportation is not possible? Well, all your particles have to become little and then they get sent through a tube.

But I wonder, okay, so if you did it, okay, they mail your particles away. So you're thinking about teleportation in the way of they disassemble your particles and then reassemble them somewhere else, right? Instantaneously, but what if they did it like a fold in time where it's like, you don't disassemble, you just step through like a doorway.

Well, you're the way of that there are different dimensions that ones happening right now. Do you mean other earths, another dimension? Like another dimension? Another dimension? Do you mean like multiple realities? Yeah, I mean, yes. The multiverse.

And that you could go to another reality and be in like Japan right now? No. Sucks. I also do not believe in that. I like it. I think it's pretty cool. You think there's another Lauren who's? No, I guess it's cool to think it. I think it's pretty cool. You think there's another Lauren who's.

It's cool to think about. I think there's some more dimension maybe with another me, but another version of the world. Without you in it. Yeah, how could you even imagine me so sad? Well, I mean, a lot of them. That's the weird part about any time you see science fiction with, you know, multiverse kind of things is everyone's in, everyone has a slight change.

Right, they're like, we only wear button-downs. I have a go-to. Yeah, but it's really like, most of the dimensions wouldn't even have you in it. Yeah, they'd be like bugs ruling the world or something. Well, also just like your parents would not have had sex at that particular time. Come on, you my ears! How do they have sex, Lauren?

No! But you know what I mean? Like, the only reason that you are who you are is because they had sex at that one instant. You would have been a total different person. Isn't that cool? Any other time, I think. But there would be more blimps. Yeah, that's true.

Blimps need to stop. Blimps need to stop! Thank you! Just was like, theme out blimps like a month ago and I was like, Blimps are canceled. Blimps are stop. Thank you. Just was like, theme out blamps like a month ago. Recipes are canceled. Blamps are canceled. I know. What is your, what is your issue? What's your waste of all resources? A hot air.

Of their diverting resources that we desperately need for balloons. When have you ever seen a blimp that made sense or you needed it? The good year blimp was by the go, okay, good, I'm thinking about good year. And then I go, what is that anyway? Tires or something?

I don't even know. The blimp doesn't even tell me enough. It's a huge advertisement. They could put, hey, guess what good year is? It's tires. You actually need them for your car or something. Like, oh, maybe good year's not even tires. And it's like gas or something.

I don't even know. That would be great if it was on that readout, on that screen. Hey, guess what good year is? It's tires. You need the free time. It is strange something I don't even know that would be great if it was on that readout on that screen Hey, guess what good years it's tires you need the fear it is strange that people Don't you know, I mean when the good year blimp was invented everyone knew what good year was because they were used to putting on their own tires And now people we all have tire butlers Why do I need to know about good year tires if I'm going to get new tires? Do I go to a tire shop or a know about good year tires. If I'm going to get new tires, do I go to a tire shop or do I go to a all-outing shop? No, this is my point. This is my point is we used to

put that we used to go buy the tires ourselves and take them home and put them on ourselves. When you were born and cool up was a star of the sky. But you, but I'm saying you, you go to a store and you don't care and someone points at a tire and you go whatever. Whatever. And you don't care what brand it is or whatever. Of course I don't. That's the point. That's my point. And that's why I need good ears, so I say I need a good ear tire. I seen the blimp.

I see the blimp over the football game. I like blimps and I want to go ride in one. Well, you should. I think it would be terrifying. Why? I hear the hot air balloon is terrifying. Oh, hot air balloon is fucked up. How did they land?

The blimp. I mean the blimp. They just set it down. Yeah, they just set it down. Anyone deflates Yeah, they poke hole in it and it goes Land any other aircraft like they have to they make a judgment How foolish is that? Well, see a big blimp running down a runway and then taking off. Has anyone ever seen a blimp take off? I don't think it runs the other way. I think it's, I think it's, I think it's, I think it's literally low where it's hot air.

It's hot air. It's hot air. And then it's up. It's hot air. Can it even go anywhere? Why do we have it? Yes. It goes all over the place.

I don't like it. Oh, I love it. Aren't blimps and dirgibles in general? Aren't they going to be an alternative Method of travel or something that that somehow got abandoned and is actually more economical put people up in the blimp part and have like You feel like a hundred fifty people in there in the It's like more economical than a subway or whatever, but for some reason we never All right a subway or whatever, but for some reason we never, all right, we have to take a break.

You don't want to listen. We're taking a break. I was saying it's more economical. No, we're taking a break. No, I'm in charge of breakdown. No, no, no, no, all right. Let the woman do the break going on your fucking idea about a blimp versus the subway. No, they thought it was more economical to take a blimp than a subway? No, it's better for our environment. It's better for our environment. Let's go to break. No, no, no, no, no.

You can't, you can just go to break when everything's don't go your way. When do you want to take a break? No, hold on. Now everyone, talk about it. You had your turn. Remember if I get Mitt, hold on. Now everyone's talking about it. Now you had your turn. Remember fucking Mitt Ronda on the... Let's go to break. Now you've had your turn.

Oh, wait. He got his chance to talk. He got his chance to talk. He got his chance to talk. You gave him a lot of time. I won't tell you. I won my talk. You're talking over her break.

You gave him? This is all break talk, by the way. Break talk. Alright, we'll be right back. No, we'll be right back. No, we'll be right back. We're back. We're back. Hello, Dolly. I like, I like Blimp so I would go on a blimp. Oh, Dolly.

You know, you should go on a blimp and stay there. Scott, I didn't mean it. I pray you don't mean that. I heard some terrifying story of someone going up in a hot air balloon and them like being blown to the middle of nowhere. Spid away? Yeah.

It just sounds terrible. Here's the thing about the hot air balloon is that it's you and maybe somebody else and then that guy. Yeah, that was like heat home's proposal story, which he's told on various. Oh no, Kurt Pronellar. Oh, they both did it. Pete, are you serious? Keep proposing a hot air balloon and the guy was there or am I mixing it up?

No, I don't know. I don't know. I heard that Kurt's story was they went up in a hot air balloon, but he didn't realize that his soon to be fiance, Lauren had a terrible fear of heights. No, and Pete's story is that they went up and then the guy was just standing there when he proposed. It's like a small basket. But Pete didn't even think about that.

Like there's, you know, that's the thing. How did, did Pete think the guy was gonna go overboard at some point? I don't know. I'll just hang over the side while you do your business. I don't know. I'll just hang over the side while you do your business. I don't know. I'll just hang from this rope. And he was like, cool.

Oh, see you in five minutes. Paul, how did you propose? I know I've heard the story. I proposed to Janie at the spot where she first took me to Sullivan's Island. And it was in a parking lot of this place called the Sand dunes club. And I've talked about this in my standup,

but my whole plan was to walk out to the beach. It was around Christmas time. Walk out to the beach and then... Jingle Bell, stringle bell. Jingle Bell, bell, bell, bell, bell, bell. And then... How does that do the walk out to the beach? I would. What? What does that have to do with that? It was Christmas time. It was Christmas time. and then go bail, string, go bail, string, go bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail,

bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail,

bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail, bail I was gonna like tap you on the knee and then I realized I'm not gonna make She's wearing holy jeans because of the fashions of the day

Spants okay keep going there's so close being shorts so Because the first time she took me to Sullivan's Island it was fourth of July weekend We parked at this place, we walked out to the beach. It was like a beautiful moonlit evening. And I was like, I'm going to recreate that. Except this time it was Christmas. And I forgot that there's no moon. So it's just pitch black and it's freezing. And so we walked back and I did my whole speech and everything. I did not get down one day. What did you do? Was it from a play or was it? Yeah, I did. I did the first corner.

The we you want me on that wall speech from a few. And she was crying. She was crying. Um, I said, you can't handle the truth. Will you marry me? Um, I, I, uh, brought the ring out of my pocket and she burst into tears. Like she had no idea at the prospect. She had no at the prospect of marrying me.

Did I talk her into it? I was like, here's the pros and here's the cons. You put a long list. Yeah. She had to agree. The pros outweighed the cons. A lot of cons, but there was one more pro. That's right.

It was a real squeaker. Sweet. And how long until you got married? Was it seven months or so? How long? It was almost a year because we knew we wanted to get married in South Carolina, but there's a very narrow window of time when you can do that where the weather isn't either dangerous or miserable.

And so we had to wait like, you know, another, we did it in the spring time, so we had to wait a year. Yeah. Biggest regret of my life that I didn't make it to that wedding. I know. Where was I? We talked about this recently. I looked it up. Yeah, I, there was some, there was some commitment that I, like with the comedy bang-bang television,

something like that. Yeah, lame. I know. And this is before we were friends. I know, I wasn't even invited. You weren't born in my friendship. Yeah. And Lauren, I know you wanted to be at our wedding,

but I wanted to, but I wasn't Brian. I'm sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet. Sweet, sweet. We have talked many times about not, like, a renewal of vowels per se. Go up, keep spying it up. Vowels. I thought you said vowels, but I like them.

I really like them. Oh, I'd like to buy an e-pad. All right, I do like it. I'd like to buy a renewal of my vowels. Vowels. I'd like to renew a vowel pad. When we pull up on to do it, but you're like, no, no, no. Well, I think, I think that she, because we have a lot of friends who were not able to

be there or we weren't friends with them yet, I just think she wants me to express my love for her in front of people again. Yeah, because I don't see it. I'm kidding. You're very in love. Well, that's why I would like to have some kind of thing. So I'm gonna celebrate you here. I'm serious.

I know you're in love with her. I want to make it clear. It's got, I know you're in love with her. I only made the joke because I felt like it was clear enough that you are. But yeah, I think, well, I mean, sometimes we have friends who like, they constantly have parties. And I think they're always looking for an excuse to have a party. I have parties.

You know what I mean? Where it's like any life thing that happens is like, let's have a big party. I'm like, oh, you guys just like having parties. But I think cool up just just wants that like expression. That's nice. Why did you get married? How many years ago? Uh, it'll be 11 in September. I... That's nice. Why did you get married? How many years ago? It'll be 11 in September. I think that's fair.

What was the date again? September 13th. I think you, that's enough time where it makes sense to do a renewal of vows. It's not like it was only 20. I know, maybe 20. 20, yeah. We're ours as things are changing here.

You know what I think about this. Here's my oh hold on. Are you going to do it? Well, wait. As I started to say, we talk about it because there are so many people that are in our lives now that we're not when we got married. Yeah. And it will be lovely to have some kind of celebration with those people because they're important to our lives. Here's what I think about this. Now you go. Scott, for you specifically. Yes. Don't say, don't say 20 because you'll regret that. If you really want to do something, I'll come up on the 20th year. That's what I'm saying. Are we some reason why we did a big nice, like the year on our ninth year when I was in charge of our whatever we were gonna do because we've been alternate control each year. Yeah

Submit the peaceful transition of power Now it's a lot's here, but I did a big special thing even though it was nine Because it was just like you did a sort of show Well, no, we went I said let's dress up and so I was wearing a tuxedo and she was wearing like a big fancy gown. Big fancy gown. And then we went to the group skirt. Yeah. We went to the train station where we got married that we started there. And then we went to Alvaro Street and had a nice Mexican lunch in our tux and everything.

Oh, this is a daytime. This is a daytime. Yeah. This is good. This is earned you a lot of years of stuff, I think. And then we went to the opera, which was over by then. That was two years ago. That was two years ago.

That was two years ago, yeah. So that was pretty big. Happy other food. I mean, it wasn't. It's called a cuna. And you paid the guy to do that. Yeah. It's a meal of the show and everyone's like yeah, who? And that's in English um, but so where are you going to say anything else about renewing the vast?

I don't know. I think it's nice, but I'm saying I don't really necessarily have a feeling about it myself I just got married so I don't really have an opinion about that. Oh, congratulations Thanks But yesterday it October, but I think that if one person really wants it, it's a very nice thing to consider. Did Mike propose to you? Did you propose to Mike? I proposed. I know where. Yeah, but don't say it. I don't want to. I don't. But I don't know the proposal story. I don't think it really was. Well, we had been to me. we talked about that I would do it.

So I didn't want him to propose to me. Yeah. Okay. So, sisters are doing it for themselves? Well, because it's a masculinity too. Well, to get down on that knee, that's why I wouldn't do it. Without getting too into my personal life, I just felt like- Yeah, because that's not what this show is about.

Well, you know, I could draw lines somewhat. I know know. I felt that from me. I wanted to be the person who decided when it would happen because he was ready for it whenever I said. Yes, that's, yeah. Okay. So I was thirsty. Very thirsty. You're a thirst trap. I'm a thirst trap, and I trapped the thirst. You were thirsty? But so I knew I was gonna do it on this, well, I thought I would do it on this one day, and then it kind of was like, if the moment presents itself.

And then I just kind of said it, and I kind of threw my whole thing out the window. I had a whole like, Oh, you did, really? All right. And then I was like, You're like, I was just like, yeah, I just wasn't crying. That's, I had a whole, I had a whole thing out the window. I had a whole like, Oh, you did really? And then I was like, You're like, Oh, I was just like, Yeah, I just wasn't crying.

That's, I had a whole, I had a beginning thing and then I realized immediately, like, I didn't plan anything else out. Yeah. I mean, the beef up the middle of this. Yeah. I knew I was just starting.

Well, I think it's interesting, having been on that side now, the nerves of it are so intense that it's like, It's crazy. It's like, I was so nervous all day. I wasn't even probably being normal. Like I was just thinking like, oh, I really want to do it.

Oh, and so I was like, it's a really specific feeling. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's crazy. Yeah, how'd you do it again? You told me. Oh, Scott's story is. Oh, yeah, you had no costume.

You had to go to Canada. Canada. We know, we know. And like Lonely Island, I was on a boat. Yeah, like Lonely Island. I also like Noah when God drowned the world. And also like Paul in a month when he goes to South Carolina. That's right.

South Carolina with Carolina. South Carolina. The southest of Carolinas. Lauren, please. Yeah. It's a very wind. It is very nerve, I don't know. Because it's not like, I wonder why is that? It's not like they, it is very nerve. I don't know. Because it's not like, I wonder, why is that?

It's not like they're gonna say no. Although the people who say no, I wonder about the person who's asking like, I wonder about their mental state. Like how do they think that was cool? The whole like, she said, yes. If there's a question, maybe don't do that. I know, but I also think like, Oh, wait, wait, wait, the people that are surprised at the person said yes. Yes. If there's a question, maybe don't do. I know, but I also think. Oh, wait, wait, wait. The people that are surprised at the person said, yes. Yeah. And if I

conversely, the people who say, no, I think about the people who asked, like, what are you even doing? But I think that if the person says, no, I think that can oftentimes be a wake up call for the first person. Because it was so much pressure on them. Now it's presented to them. And like, well, now that you ask, I guess no. But the idea of saying no instantly, like I feel like I can imagine the world where someone says yes and then like two days later, like, it's like, by the way, no.

Yeah, I actually know someone that happens to you. She said yes and then by the way, no, I know people that's happened to you. And then they got married later though. Yeah, well, yeah, I know people, but- No, I mean to each other. No, I didn't know that. I just took, I got like,

but I know people that felt no, but they got married. No, no, no, no, no, no, to each other though. Okay, so you asked me, Paul, will you marry me? No, but really, you got to really make it like a real proposal. All right, all right, Paul, I've loved you since the minute that I saw you. This is real. I don't, I try to imagine my life without you

and the only way it works is if there was some sort of natural disaster and you were killed instantly by a tsunami or something. I was the only survivor. Don't say that. Come on. Come on. I don't know what to do in the middle of this. I had that great opening and I have a great ending,

but I lost the do in the middle of this. I had that great opening. I have a great ending, but I lost the plot in the middle. But Paul, I don't want to spend another minute without you, will you marry me? No. Let me try. Paul. Paul, is this a game just trying to get him to say yes? This is the future.

Do you know what? Yeah, let's see what you got. Let's see what you got. All right. Paul, Lauren, if you can convince Paul to say yes You guys have to get married today Fine

Literally not possible. You're very very down legally. There's so You're very dumb. Okay So it's yours. You're very dumb. OK. You're a very dumb. Paul. Hey, what's up? I don't know if he's in the right head space for this lore.

Are you OK? Wait, I think about our relationship. You want me to think about it? Well, because that's what I'm going to talk about. Ever since we first started doing podcasts together, I've been waiting for the day when I can make you my wife. And I'm finally ready to ask you. Be your marry man!

Oh, Lauren, no. Oh, that was really, that was worse than how you turned down Scott because it was like, you pitted me. Yeah, it did. Wow, that's it. That does not feel good to be turned down. Really, really bad. Yeah, wow.

Scott, yes, Paul. We've known each other for such a long time. Yeah. And I can't imagine anymore a time when you weren't in my life. There was a good chunk. Well, you can't imagine anymore. But yeah. You are so important to me.

Why is Lauren here, by the way? I'm not here. I'm just in your head. Why am I constantly thinking about her? Please just let me see this. Sorry, go ahead. I love it. Even in this scenario, you can't stop interrupting. Yeah, you freaked out at me for interrupting. And then you interrupted so much. Yeah, you freaked out at me for interrupting and then you interrupted so much. You deserve to get slapped. Shut up, boy!

Shut up! Paul, go ahead. Scott. Just propose. Who me? Shut up, Lauren. He's proposing to Mickey. I'm talking to him.

Scott. You and his head, too? No. Yes, Paul, please just focus on me. Sorry. I'm just, I'm not feeling well. You mean everything to me? Oh, will you marry me? Yes.

Yes. Really? Yes. Yes. You called my bluff. You're bluffing? Yeah, I thought, I thought this would get you out of my life. Wow, it would be so awkward that you wouldn't talk

about that man. Oh, yeah. Oh, I'm retiring. I don't like this game. It's not a good game. I guess we get a stop. Because I just wanted a happy ending for one of the couple. Is that what you say at every massage?

Oh! Oh! All right, let's take a break. My favorite rose! Let's take a break. Hi everyone, welcome back to Freedom and it's time for Features. If you have a feature. Welcome back to Freedom.

It's 3-cher time. 3-cher. Welcome back. We are back now with a feature. It is the time of the show where we do a game. It's a feature or really it's a feature. We're gonna play switcher or pitch it. It's the time of the show when we do a game. We're gonna play switcher or pitch it again. This is an old favorite. We played it a couple of times and this is the feature where one of us says the title of a television show or I guess a movie that already exists.

And the other TV show. Okay, we'll keep a TV show. And the other two people movie make Lausier House. The other two people then have to say the title of what the opposite of every word is and that is their title, basically, of the new show. It's one person pitching to two people. Oh, it is. Oh, right, right. So... So if it was family matters, you would be like...

It would be like... Single. Strangers, strangers, inessential strangers or something. And then the person has to then pitch that show and then also sing what the theme song of that show would be. Yes, exactly. Okay, so who's going to pitch first and who's going to say the title first? I'm going to pitch someone to say the title.

Okay. All right. All right. I don't. Do you? Yes. Okay, go. I'm trying to think of any TV show in the world and I can't think of a single one. Lauren, hi. Thank you for coming in. Hi. Hi, Lauren. Did you park okay? You park in the structure? When do you tell me the title? Sorry. I'm getting to it. Yes, I parked in the structure. When do you tell me the title, sorry. I'm getting to it. Yes, I parked in the structure. I actually got very confused

and I'm not sure if I did it right, because it was like every floor only had one car. Did you run into any cars? No. So you didn't crash, so that's good. Sounds like you did it right. Yeah, you're doing good. You're doing fine.

I'm talking about that, just I'm sorry. All right, Lauren. So I understand you project that you're pitching to us today. It's called, no, no, she has to come up with the opposite. You tell me the original. This is why I stopped you. Be right. Thank you.

Law and order. So what is this show that you're going to be pitching? And I hope it's not called Law and Order. Oh my God, because Law and Order already exists. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,. No. No. Because that's copyrighted. You wouldn't think you could copyright that, but it actually is. Three peed is also copyrighted. Yep. Hmm. Is it? Yeah, you can't say it. Oh, well, what do you owe me money right now? Well, you didn't copyright it. So. So sorry. Um, okay. Just leave. Okay. I'll leave the deck here. You can look at it later. But while you're leaving, while you're leaving, tell us about your show. This show is really small.

Because we love to watch you walk away. Crime and mess. Crime and mess. What is this show about? So it's about people who commit crimes and leave a big mess behind. Oh, is it like evidence? Or just they look untidy. We don't know if it's evidence or just they look untidy?

We don't know if it's evidence or not. Like they were eating a sandwich while the kids were solved. And so the people come in and they come and they bring the people, the climbers. Criminals. She doesn't know what she's talking about. She, I mean, it's a TV show.

It's not she's not speaking a real life thing. I guess maybe it's she's world building right now where people are called climbers people are called this is in the future and that's how you know oh we're not listening to me no no do we still talking I was I just saw you guys go on to the table but we will whispering to each other about someone else what do we miss we climbers they come in the climbers do big messes. And in each apartment that they break into, it's all within one complex.

So we see the homeowner or the apartment renter and then they are living there. And then the, uh, so I'm sweating. I just, you are. It's okay. It's all right. Sweating buckets. It's very hot in here. Is it? Yeah. On purpose. Okay. Um, so the climbers come in and they do a bad and they make a mess and then the never gets resolved. Never gets resolved. Never get resolved. So everybody entire how long is this ever gets resolved? Each show is going on indefinitely. So I need to be on every network because every time you switch to your channel there's another crime happening.

It's different. And it just continues on forever. So this is like life. And we just see the apartment living happening after in the person that they ever repaint the apartments or. They might. They might. They might be a good storyline. So what is the, when people switched to another network, are they hearing a theme song? Sorry. You, which one is, which one of you is Joe?

And which one is Joe, Joey? I'm Joey. I'm Joey. I'm Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey. Joey'm Joey. I'm Joey. Joey. Joey's looking at me. Joey and Joey. Joey is looking at me very. Yeah. I am confused. Are you pitching this to every network? Yeah, because we're all I want. We can't arrange to have it be on every network. Yeah. So you're trying to get everyone who would read it. What network is this? What network is this? You don't even know what network is this? This is HGTV.

Because my understanding was I was walking into TV building where you control all the TV. OK. Excuse us. We can go to the table. Yeah. I'm sorry to say. I'm sorry to say.

Who gave her the recommendation to come in? How did she book this appointment? She's my niece. Oh. So you can imagine I was also named she can remember which one I was. Yeah, exactly. So wait, you're her uncle and we're Uncle Joey.

All right, so which your sister, your brother, we'll cut it out. Okay, all right. So Uncle Joey, I just feel like. I'm not your uncle. I'm not your uncle. Okay. All right. So Uncle Jojoey, I just feel like I'm not your uncle. I'm not your uncle. Bob's my uncle? Hey, why don't you call it a date and you just make this?

Okay. No, we ain't going to tip it in our favor. Yeah, because you were not doing good. Is there a thing? Well, is there a thing? Yeah, it goes like this. So it's called crime and mess. And you got grammar roasted, by the way, it goes like this. So it's called crime and mess. And you got

grammar roasted by the way. It goes like this. Cut good. Good, good, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut. Cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut, cut. Are you saying words? Yeah. Cut cut Joey. Joey. I'm gonna have to cry, man. There's a mess. Until did it. We need to insist. I'm gonna have to cry, man.

I don't have any guardianship over for this. I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do it. Alright, well. it? Good. All right, well. Okay, well, thank you for coming in. Well, pushing me out the door, okay. My shoes are entied. Don't try to get back in here.

Okay, I won't. Goodbye. Do you valedate? Nope, not for you. Not even, like, just something nice you could say about me. Look, you came in here with a smile on your face and you're leaving the same way. You have an idea that you believe in? I'm not leaving with a smile on my face.

I've turned it into so bad here. I don't know. That's whatever is wrong with you. Continue to be wrong with you. Yeah, I'm with you. Okay, bye. Bye. Bye. No sale. No sale. Seen. Continue to be wrong with you. Okay, bye

Scene so that so we win if we can actually convince the people to buy yeah, that's how you win So look at that one hurt Who's next? Show is house of lies Hey everyone, it's, so I'm so thankful that you saw me. I mean, I know I've been failing in the industry for a number of years and been kicked off. You don't need to come in and say that. We already know it.

And you've been kicked off of the blimp, you've been kicked off of the, the afternoon show that you had, which was a nightmare. I'm just a big failure. And every show that I've ever created has lost money, and I just really appreciate you seeing that. No, no, no, we took this meeting because we're morbidly curious.

What do you have to say? And morbidly obese, I have to say. Well, both very big. You know what, I feel already that I don't think I like you. And I think, why is that? Well, I actually know you from your programs, and I've always hated your vibe. Yeah, I know.

And now that you're in here, I just have a thing about me. I get it, I get it. But wait until you hear the idea, because remember, people aren't gonna be watching me on television. They're gonna be watching this idea. Sorry, my coworker's to piss. That's a lot. I have a very loose urethra.

All right, my show is called Truth Apartment. Truth Apartment. Yep, and you hate it already? Let's give it a chance. Let's hear what it's about. Let's unembury himself. I love it. You know what it is to get to. You know what I'm saying?

Got the dots ever heard of her. She's got a little tool on her cheek. Yeah, but she's got a little tool on her belt called the magic lasso. And you know what it does when she ties it around someone? I know. It makes people tell the truth. It makes people tell the truth.

I was actually gonna answer, but you raised your hand and nobody even called on you. So she got this on Paradise Island, and someone said, hey, why not make the whole plane out of it? And she was like, ha ha, that's funny. But instead, I'm gonna use this material because they grow it on Paradise Island like hemp, basically. Oh yeah.

And I'm gonna make, and I'm gonna make buildings out of it. So they make an apartment building out of this and anyone who goes into this apartment building has to tell the truth and it's like Big Bang Theory. But what if the roommate? It's like Big Bang Theory? It's like Big Bang Theory, but- Well that was successful.

I'm listening. But you know how so many of their episodes are about like people lying to each other and covering up truth? What if they couldn't do that? Like the movie Liar Liar, which Jimi was forced to tell the truth and also said things that he didn't need to say. Exactly.

Yeah, in a weird strange way. So what if it was Big Bang Theory where everyone told the truth to each other? And seen. So are the episodes five minutes because there's no deception and no confusion. The episodes are two minutes, even better. Yeah, so it's perfect short form content. We have a new platform we're bringing out called Dumble.

And it's going to be, all the shows are two minutes or less. I saw that movie, yeah, it was good. People view them. Dumble, Dumble, and DUMBO. Yeah, Dumble. It's our, no, no, no, no, it's Dumble. It's what you are. Tim Burton's Dumble.

No, no, that's what you are. It was good. No, no, no I'm saying dumb bull if dumb bull is a platform. Yeah people watch lapping years They watch television shows that are two minutes long that they receive through text messages I'm about to give it I'm about to give you an offer and you're being so fucking Inseveral that driving us in crazy offer it offer it So I want to just explain the platform. It's called Dumble, and we have two-minute programs that are texted to people based on subscriptions

where they pay out boards of $20 at an episode. Via text message, all you have to write is more, and you get another one. I'm in. And, well. Texting stop will not end it. I'm in, I'm in. The only way you can edit is by saying more,

enough times to the point that we understand you mean stop. Now, Dumble is already successful in that we have- We read it, we're like, okay, now they're exaggerating. Yeah, and we are reading it. We're in charge of seeing- It's too thirsty. Yeah. We go, oh, I think they meant stop.

He's making a joke by saying more so many times. Yeah, I got it. But we have to kind of know the person and know their sense of humor. We just do offer research. Oh, well, it's an offer research. I mean, we want to be you know their sense of humor. We do offer research. We do offer. Well, it's an op-o research. I mean, we want you to be part of the Dumbled. Okay.

Dumbled is gonna be the next big thing because. Timber's Dumbled. Oh, God. Your rhymes with Tumbled. Does that clear it up? Yeah, Tumbled. Starting Brian Krass. Yes, exactly.

I'm gonna kick your teeth into the come out your butt. I don't think I like you. But okay. And. But okay. And. But I just want to complete my pitch about dumbled because. Okay, well, I thought I was pitching to you. I don't know because I want to pitch the platform and see if it's a good fit. Okay, we're working on dumbled for the last 15 years.

Are you drinking your own? It feels like 16. It does. Yeah. So it feels like that. That's we've done a lot of traveling. We just had an earthquake How dare you and you don't respect you save water my entire family is dead. I know about the earthquake

We don't want your idea congratulations. Yeah, no, what if I sang the song now you have two Christmas song true apartment Where six people live. They're all friends with each other until they start telling the truth. Then they hate each other, but they cannot leave, because they barred the doors, and they nailed inside. Everyone had to sit there with each other till they cried and they died in the truth of the partners. You can never leave. You can never leave? I don't think you mentioned that. But

did I not mention that? That was half the opposite. That's a big part of it. So the first habit you sing that. It's just me singing that. The camera's on me. And then at one minute of the people telling the truth to the part when they can't leave. And I hope you were taking that because So the first habit you singing that just me singing that the cameras on me and then at one minute of the people Tell the truth in the apartment they can't leave and I hope you're taking that because I will not sing it again In other words, I was taping it. You're a video just sold in the room. Yes We finally got a show on First first show we're gonna launch with you or gonna put you on the billboard singing the song It's gonna be a live video.

I'm gonna do it live? On every Billboard video. I'm gonna clear my schedule. No, you're gonna stand on a Billboard edge. I'm gonna stand on it. And then if you die, we don't have to make your show. Yeah, and this happens in 10 minutes. Well, what do I wear?

Because I can't wear these. I mean, I'll use this old Tuxedo. It's about a year out of date. I need a current one. No, you wear that. Get, rent me a current Tuxedo. You screwed the deal, it's a... Rent me a current Tuxedo.

Get out of this office. This is my office. Leave. I invited you here. I know, that's, we're pulling a real power move. Get out of your office. This is now Dumbleddumbled headquarters. You're taking over my office.

It's double HQ. Do I still have to pay the rent? Yes, you must pay the rent. Bye. All right, Paul, you ready? Yeah, I'm ready, man. OK. Your show is Dateline NBC.

OK, welcome. Who's our next meeting? Who's this? I think it's Joe Joey. Joe Joey, G. John Chins. Joe Joey, G. John Chins. Hi, my name's Paul. I don't know if I'm the right guy.

No, it's nice and nice after him. Oh, after Paul. Yeah, Joe, Joey, G. John Chins is after Paul. Paul left after Paul. You're a discussing who your next person gets me, it's Paul of Tomkins and then Joe, Joey, do John, John, John, John, yeah, Joe, Joey, G, John, G, John, Paul, F, Compton, Paul, okay. Should I, we're just trying to plan our day. Hi, I'm, I'm Shivian. Hi, Shivian. And this is Divian, Divian. People call me D. Thank you. People call me S.

Thank you so much, S&D, for having me. I'm very excited. I can't wait to hear your pitch, because we loved everything we brought us in. We love you. We love you so much. We love you, back. We wanted to make everything you've done, but we just haven't. Yeah.

We just always love you. We're tight with the purse strings. We're just never. We just never do it, but we always see. We always want to. We always say you want to. We always see all these things. We always want to. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you.

We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you.

We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you.

We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you. We always see you but will never employ you. Thank you. So what is that? What do you got for the C, P for the C? What do you got for us? Well, I have an exciting new show.

Oh, this sounds exciting. It's called Marriage.CBN. Marriage.CBN. Yes, and the CBN stands for, this sounds like a web address. It's not. Have you ever gone to dot CBN? I haven't, but maybe sounds like a web address. It's not. Have you ever gone to .CBN? I haven't, but maybe it's a new thing. I don't know, like .gov.

.edu. You are right. I am right. It is not a website yet. You may be looking stupid, but it's going to be. No, no, no, you both look very smart. Oh. Because you already hear that?

Yes, did you hear that? You're already talking about the idea. Yeah, it's so confusing that makes me go what is that marriage Dodge Yes, yes, wow, okay, and so is it spelled marriage DOT or is it just a dot? It's just a dot, okay And what's it about and is it real or is it fake aren't you curious as to what CBN stands for? Yes, please tell us CBN it stands for? Yes, please tell us CBN. It stands for crypto buying neighbors. Whoa, crypto's very popular now.

So current. So, currency. It's current currency there. Yes, exactly. So the marriage, so these, okay, marriage.cbn. It's a website, but it's characters that live on the website. Oh. And they are neighbors, and they're both buying crypto from each other back and forth.

And they talk about anything or buy anything with it. They never buy anything with it, except more crypto. Love that. So we're constantly talking about. Do they own any possessions? No. Really? No clothes? Nope. No motor car. They're both They're naked. They're both nude by choice. So nude. Oh, so they're new. They're not making it when you're not by

Chosen. Make it is when someone strips all your clothes from you. Yes, and nude is when you choose to take out your clothes I want to take off my clothes. I'm calling a char. They're two nude people What is the emotion that naked is with someone? What do you think Harold Ramos wants to do with this? They he's dead and barely leave I'm not on the bottom you okay they meet on the website Marriage dot CBN okay Where they are training cryptos back and forth. Eventually.

So this is for singles who want single crypto. No, it's not. And cherishing. It's only for married people. They shouldn't you be on there. Oh, this is like an Ashley Madison situation. Exactly. You know a lot about that.

Yeah. He had a quite an assia affair that was on phone. Oh my God. I see Madison. He turns a service on that website. You had a quite an ass-y affair that was on the phone. Oh my God. I'm so jealous. The turns of service on that website. Mm-hmm. You got to read it. No, everyone knows he's a real creep. Yeah.

Yeah. There was a huge cancellation. I cheated on my wife with her. Well, I didn't sign off on you telling me. This is the least I've done. No, she was asleep. She was asleep. Divian S. I'm not even calling you D right now because I'm so mad. I didn't know about this. Diveon? You didn't know about this?

I wrote you that note. Diveon, we're trying to accept a pitch. All right, Paul. I'm not Paul. That's right, I'm still here. And so they fall in love on the website. The two people who are trading a credit card. What are their names?

You haven't said their names yet. I was afraid to say that. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. And so they fall in love on the website. The two people who are trading the credit card. What are their names? You haven't said their names yet.

I'm afraid to get to this part. Their names are Divion and Sivion. Wow, I love this. Wow. And they're watching a character named Sivion. How cool. Yeah, the representation matters. It does.

It's been just a minute. It does. It does. It does. Not enough Div It does. It does. Not enough divvians on television. Wow. So is it just these two nude characters in Are there any more? I mean. And so is it kind of like naked and afraid, but they're nude and charged?

Yeah. That was the alternate title. Nude and in charge of the. It was the alternate title. I love this. I want to buy it. How long is the episode? Every episode is 90 minutes long?

And is it a comedy? Is it a drama neither neither? No jokes no conflict, nope. I think this would be great for drunk our new app drunk. Yeah, it's a 90 minute shows that you watch when you're driving and we say Hey, everyone should drunk driving everyone should be drunk driving And so it's it's's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, Here's the offer. We'll give you a thousand dollars in episode budget, and you get paid a thousand dollars on top of that. So two thousand dollars. An episode.

So every episode. An episode, yeah. And you get that. We're talking two grand, two big ones. Two K. Two K, two large per episode. And you get to make two episodes. And you get to slap one actor per episode. And you get to make two episodes. And you get to slap one actor per episode.

And then we announce it the same day we cancel it. Yeah. And we don't show any of the episodes ever. And they go into a vault. They go into the Disney Vault. And you pay us $2,000 per episode that you made. Yeah. And they're right next to the song of the South.

And they make a big, fancy-rided Disneyland based on it, based on this thing that no one will ever get to see again. And you don't get money for that. You don't get any money for that. How's that? Sounds great. A deal has been made. A deal is struck.

You're rich. Great. So who gets so excited? Most of them do a dance when we give them the dance. Yeah, most people dance. I mean, no, I'm very excited. Okay. You don't seem excited, is everything all right?

Everything's fine. Anything else you need to know about the show or? No. I mean, I'd like to hear the theme song, but... Marriage.cbn. Pretty short for a 90 minute episode. I like it. I think we let it go.

Because it could be ringtones, it could be gifs, it could be memes, it could be everything. Are you afraid that you're going to have- I'll just see myself out. Wow. Don't you want to sign this? Don't you want to sign these contracts here? Oh! Okay. Okay. He's gone. Well, what do we do with the rest of our day? Because we can keep $4,000

and just put it because our next meeting isn't for another Joey Joey J. J. Jockins is coming in. But not for another eight hours. All right, I'll go to sleep. hours. I go to sleep. That's our show people. We got to wrap it up. We got to wrap it up. We have to. We have to. We have to wrap it up. We couldn't wrap it up fast enough. Love you guys a ton. Love you. So much thousand pounds you should be uncomfortable with it Fly me to the moon Let me play on the stars Let me see what bring it like God, you're a bit upset I'll do better in Mars In other words hold my hand

In other words, darling, kiss me. Wow! A bell by always all you let me play forevermore. You all roll, I long for all my worship and adore. In other words, please be true Bada bada bada bada bada Bada bada bada bada In other words, bada bada bada

Bada bada bada bada Bada bada bada bada You Buh! Buh! Buh! Buh! You! Buh! Bye! you