TigerBelly - Ep 310: Reservation Dogs, Sterlin Harjo, & The Whole Truth
Episode Date: August 18, 2021Bobby switches to 1000x speed. Sterlin loses his car in the Hollywood Hills. Khalyla flashes an old man. We talk Dr. Kang's sex scene, Meeting Taika Waititi at Sundance, Bill Burr's Okie acce...nt, and the Rose Bowl Pussy Flute. Please support our sponsors.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Your hat your hat that you gave me I wear it all the time. I know I love it
Advertisement yeah, like sell them or no one knows what it means
Because there's nothing I can do with that advertisement, but yeah, yeah, it's beautiful
Well, you can't they can't Google if they read read my hat
They can't Google it and see what it is and they can't buy it sure but no they can't but like my brother's right me
And they're like Bobby these got your hat on man. Yeah, they're excited
Sell it. I know
Fucking sell it man. Yeah, I will know t-shirts in the hat. Yeah, maybe I will
What do you say? You have deodorant. It's not hard to sell deodorant. I forgot to put deodorant
No one can smell you
Baby, baby, baby, baby, baby. It's too late for that. It's gonna happen. You should you should have done that way before
And he says the whole you don't want to do headphones. You don't have to do whatever you want
Oh, I'm good. Can you hear me from here? Yeah. Yeah, you can hear me right now clear, okay?
Can I tell you guys a story of something that happened to me today that I need your
But you can we start the pot you want to do it on the podcast or four all right do pre pre
Prepare it. Okay. We'll do it during the podcast. I do it now
You fucked it up
Always fucked up. I know you can't do anything right. Yeah
Well, can I tell you guys a story then? I was nervous. You want to do it during the guy did mark marin the other day
Yeah, how is that bad and I just like you know like going in there like let's just talk this one. I was like
Chugging wine everyone say that. Yeah. I don't know because I've just listened to you
I mean, I've listened to him too, but like sir sir sir Lin
I just want to say something yeah that I'm equally as nervous because when you I was like he's coming
What do we talk about? I'm hired. Yeah, I don't know what to do
You know I mean and I get like internal sweats. Yeah. Yeah, so it's we're almost I get external sweats if I'm yeah
Yeah, I do too
Sweat stash like even when I was on Marin like I was wondering if he's gonna put this in there
Halfway through I was like drinking his hot coffee like 20 minutes in actually I was like drinking his hot-ass coffee
Yeah, cuz I was like I gotta have his coffee and then I was just like nervous as shit
Forehead sweating and he was are you alright?
He's like, you need me turn that back on
Don't call me out like that and then luckily it wasn't on there
Well, that's really nice. He wanted to check if you were in homeo spaces, but also when I did his podcast
I was a feeling of
Dread because I I knew how big it was. I know that it was a pioneer podcast show
And I wanted to be good, but I feel like I wanted to do it again
But what's the one podcast you've been the most nervous to do?
Like ever ever
Joe Rogan, I've never done it. Oh, you didn't you have in the new not in the new way
Oh, yeah, not in the new age. Yeah, I did it when it was like the Wild West. Yeah. Um, I was never nervous about those
Probably mark Marin. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. I was nervous because it's like, you know Obama
Was there like, oh, right? Oh, but like what Thomas Anderson was there? Yeah
Heroes of the miners was like, I'm sitting there and like am I gonna have anything to say and honestly
It wasn't until I listened I listened to the podcast back that I was like, oh, like I sounded all right
Like it wasn't that bad, you know, you know, you're gonna be terrible in this one. I'm sure no
No, I could I really want it to be bad. Yeah
I'm gonna throw out some things
Oh, yeah, let's make it bad ball for sure. Yeah, you're terrible now. Yeah
What if it's like the first like 30 minute
Are you gonna fucking tell your story or not? Are you sweating? Oh, you want to touch my armpits, please?
I don't want to touch your imprints. I don't want to touch your imprints. Your armpit imprints
Let's just start and then do it. Okay. Let's start and do it right go
I thought we are the stuff no on the story
Fuck the story. Go ahead five. Oh, no, wait, wait, wait, I want you to cleverly. Yeah, right weed in your story
Not now, but somewhere in the podcast. Well, we're not gonna know
Okay, the whole podcast
Sterling are gonna be like that was the story. Yeah, do it like so
Oh, you're right slyly. Okay, right and baby. This is a very important pressure is on
All right, so go ahead five speaking of so go
That's not it, babe very funny
Very funny
Go ahead five four three two one
Welcome to another episode of tiger belly. I'm your slept king and I am feeling um, I'm a float
I'm a float where where I'm like, I feel like I'm a float
Somewhere in some parade a body of water. No like one of those
Oh, oh, like
And I feel like I'm one of those
The grand marshal no one of those inflatable things. I'm like a snoopy turkey. No, no
Maybe just like the big yellow you do look like a weather blower. Yeah
Yeah, just like getting yellow mass of something and we're all the kids on the side, you know going. Yeah, mommy
What's that and the kids parents are I don't fucking know, you know, I mean, but I feel good
We have people in the room
we've got
George and um
What a good friend. That's a great haircut short. Um, you know what dude in a war
You and I I feel like you would save me, of course he would like I get shot in the ass
Ah, right John, right? I feel like you would go through all the napalm and the bullets that you'd carry me
And then you get hit in the leg and you would still do a drag, you know, I mean
You're like that kind of guy
Appreciate it. Would you reciprocate? What would you do the same? No
Because I I just knew I would I know wouldn't be able to carry him
Ah, he's just a bigger guy. I just know my body. So I probably just do like, you know, I'd be the priest
I like, you know, I put that little collar on and I just do this and I go, dear lord Jesus christ
Please bring this man. I don't know. I don't say homes. No the heaven
And I'm sorry I had a jersey mike sandwich and it's half of it just came out
We got oh, what's what's the matter? It's okay
What
Fuck you. Fuck you. I love you. It's okay. So we got this guy. Should I get me in your movie?
Yeah, my fiance's movie your fiance's movie tell her I'll do the next project. Okay. I've just been really busy doing network shit
And then we got my beautiful girlfriend Kalei Likun. Um, but we have a very special guest so
You know over my the years of Bobby Lee being an entertainer, right?
I've sometimes done, you know, I mean some theatrical things, you know
I was in the movie the dictator herald and kumar movies back in my life
I've been curbing one curbing enthusiasm this and that, you know, I've done all kinds of different things
You know, I've done game shows as you know game on right cbs
That's a dunk of all time. That's dunk of all time. That's what they're saying the kids are saying. Yeah, so um
But I've never done a project so
Don't say anything yet, but um, I feel like I'm only here for
season
I I want to introduce you. Okay first. I'll do it. I'll introduce you first and then I'll get into my thing. All right, so um
What we have now is the showrunner
Right and the creator of the show reservation dogs on fx slash hulu
Sterling Harjo give him a run. Thank you. Thank you. The sterling welcome to this program. Thank you. I'm a big fan. Yeah
Seem nervous. I'm not
I'm not. All right. I mean, I did just peel the
I was like peeling things
I am nervous. I'm nervous about the show. No, you made me nervous, but I'm a fan though. Oh, you know whenever I
When bobby audition or wait, you didn't audition. I just met you. Sorry
Well, let's let's ask me to audition you and I was like, no, he's a fucking king
We can't we can't have him audition. I wrote it for him
I know, but can I just tell you the way it went down? Yeah, I did have an audition
You did. Yeah, they sent me the slides for dr. King
No, yes, it is. I didn't see anything. I know you didn't but I did get an audition. I said, I don't want to audition
Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right not because I was too above the project. It's just that but you were too
In my head
No, in my head, I'm like, I'm not gonna get it. Yeah, that's always everything that I
I get right. Well, you know, but I'm a fan. So I've heard I didn't know that I've heard this spiel
And I knew and so I knew how he felt and so I was kind of juggling
Network and also I knew bobby wouldn't want to audition because I've heard him say like, why don't I just get an offer, you know
Things like that. Yeah, and so in my mind, I'm like, fuck like they want him to audition
He's gonna say no
Because he doesn't think we want him and he was literally the only one I was asking. Yeah. Wow
And you know, I gotta I got honestly, I got a bunch of audition auditions. Yeah
Of other dr. King. Yeah. Wow
And
They were probably people, you know
And they're probably good. They're probably good. Yeah, good. But like everyone was like
For me, not everyone there were some great ones, but like for me. I wanted
Bobby Lee disheveled dr. King
You know what I mean? Like I wanted you to bring the edge to it
Yeah, and everyone was bringing
Kind of I'm a Korean doctor to it. You know what I mean?
I wanted it to be this like a backstory without having to explain a backstory, you know this idea of like you
Like what the fuck did this guy go through to
To land this job, you know, all right, right the most
Unsought-out job for a Korean doctor, you know, yeah
And so I was just getting a lot of kind of straight-up doctors, you know, and that's not what the role was, right?
Yeah, but then he wouldn't audition so I had to know that it wasn't because
It wasn't fucking because it was like it's obviously
Tell me the truth. It's dumb on my part and it's dumb on uh, I don't want to say her name your manager
Oh, you just google it, but basically it's like the they know the way the what you're putting the earphones on. Yeah, I just kind of want to
I feel like I'm not nervous anymore. Yeah. Yeah. All right. All right. So yeah, okay, cool
So this is how it went down the way my my manager tells me there's an audition is she goes as simplistic as possible
She'll she'll go
Dr. Fx
Oklahoma. Oh, wow. That's the job right without telling me who's doing it
What it is, you know, I mean and when you read that you go
No
You know, I was at the time I was I already caught wind of the trades and I knew that reservation dogs was gonna get made
So when when I overheard through the phone her saying Oklahoma, I was like, which project is this?
And then I asked her I go wait. Who's doing it? Yeah, you wait you overheard her on the phone
On the phone. Yeah, she was next to me and she goes on she goes on take it to kawiki
And I go is it take a ytt and she goes. Yeah. Yeah, that's it
And then when you said that she goes she Kalala goes you have to do it, right?
I said, are you fucking crazy? You have to do it. But then I go, um, but then abby goes
Calls me back and she goes
You just said a game
I don't get sterling hard. Joe wants to talk to you. Um
That's how we zoomed. Yeah
So we as soon as that but in between that was me watching all of these auditions because they were like he won't audition
We can't do it
And so I'm in my own turmoil going like fuck like I'd been talking in the writer's room
Even I was saying this I wrote this for him like this is going to be his role
Uh, and I had to go through the the motions of like, oh, no
We're going to see we're going to see all these actors because bobby won't audition
It's offer only and so I had to go through all these fucking auditions thinking like fuck
I got to pick somebody
But I and then in the end I was just like I really want bobby lee though, you know
Yeah, and to fx's credit and everyone's credit. They were just like, okay. Oh, wow. Cool. You saw everything cool
So, um, also at the kind of just say this I was also on my way to go to Hungary for two months
And so to do Borderlands and in my head. I'm like, I just have a lot on my plate. It had nothing to do with
If if if my manager had said it's taiko iti, you know, it's fx. I would have been like, yeah, I'll read right
But I didn't have that information. Just let you know. Yeah. And then once I saw your fat face on the fucking zoom, right?
That's what it was. Yeah, handsome fat
Yeah
Right your handsome glorious glorious
Thank you. Yeah, right and cute right
But as soon as I saw your face, I'm like, oh because when I when I think of showrunners, I think of
I mean, I want to just throw out a guy like, um
Dick plusuchi who was the mad tv showrunner. Yeah, like an older. Yeah shirt talking
Kind of a business looking guy, you know, I mean and I and as soon as I saw you I'm like, oh
That guy looks like, you know, I mean, well the first thing I said to him was uh, slept king
Right as soon as he just because I wanted him to know right that I was a fan. Oh as soon as he did that, I was like, oh, I'm doing it
Yeah, this is gonna be you know, yeah, so, um
Then I I said yes to do it and I have to say that, um
Number one. Congratulations. What a great show. Thank you. Um how original and um
But number two, it's like I've never gotten I told you this outside
Out of all the things I've ever gotten in my in my career. This is the most compliments. I've ever gotten
I'll tell you how crazy it's gotten. So my neighbor. We hate him. We hate him
We've been beefing with him for two years, right?
Okay, shut your dogs up. You know what I mean? Like he he he
Honestly, he sticks his head through our bushes. Like you see green green green and then a white
Yeah, yeah, yeah, and he tells us to like put our dogs back in because they're barking too much
Yeah, yeah, or he'll go I may I make a suggestion to you young man
I go, what is it? Well, why don't you get a dog trainer? I mean or whatever, right?
So I avoid him. So
Yesterday was yesterday. Yeah, yes
I was out smoking a cigarette and he heard the bushes like, you know, I mean as if there's like there's like, you know
I mean a velociraptor in in Jurassic Park, you know, the bushes shake
That's what it was like, right? And he sticks his head out and I go, oh god
I haven't seen this motherfucker in eight months
All right, I've been avoiding this guy. I go. Hey, sorry. I just smoking
Right. I'm sorry in your own
Sorry, I don't know because I don't over I never spoke to the white man. Yeah, my god. Oh, yeah
I never spoke. Yeah, right. I because I've seen all the Karen videos. I don't know what happens
So I'm smoking so I'm smoking the cigarette and he got I go. I'm sorry. I just what he goes. Oh, no
I want to say
fine
Acting young man on that hulu show
Reservation and I go, really? Thanks. He goes, no, I mean you got skill
And you walked right in the house. So you've patched up
You patched up our fucking
I think yeah, yeah bringing people together. So I've gotten more compliment white people
Yeah, yeah, yeah, then he dips his head back out. He's like fucking take your dog
I want to talk about um, so I go to Oklahoma. Yeah, right and um
Um, remember the first rehearsal the first rehearsal. Oh, yeah, you were like nervous. I was like so nervous. I was like, wait, what did I do?
Seriously, because like the whole cruise there the whole cruise and I'm like, wait a minute. What just happened?
Bobby's like, I think you said it like it was like if you speed someone up
Like times 10,000. Yeah
Yeah, that's what it was. That's what and I stopped after the you nervous. I'm nervous for I don't know why
I don't know why you're nervous. You do table, right? No, I mean what's the table read literally?
It was like on
It was right before the blocking when you read. Oh my god. When you were just supposed to say the lines
You're shooting all you gotta do is go say the lines, you know, and like you don't fuck. All right, man
All right
So what happened was I knew I was nervous, right?
And I knew that once we shoot I'm not gonna do it that way. You know what I mean? I just needed to get it out
Yeah, and but I could see I could feel the tension because it's a small space, right?
The super small space and there's like 80 people in the small space. I'm exaggerating, obviously
Which is I know people sometimes take things literally
Right on the show. So, um, very small space. Yeah, it's a small space and there was probably let's be honest
12 people no, I was 25
All right, let's say
85 so it's Pat and I could feel after I did the rehearsal like people just kind of you know, like
You know the camera guys doing the camera trying to do
Doing the camera thing the sound guys, you know, I mean trying to feel you know, I mean like people are doing things
Shut the fuck up. You know and Sterling kind of just peeking at his sweats
And I looked at him and I go I got it. Don't worry about it. Yeah, he's in
Didn't I say that you didn't I got I got this. I'm not gonna do that
I'm not gonna do it break in between that and the final
Yeah, it's like, all right, we're about to do a take now because I remember him calling me and we were practicing how to say retina
Like babe retina retina
right, so, um
But then once I got the first take down. Yeah, I was like fine. You know what I mean, but it was um, you know what seen that was
Do you remember? Yeah, I do. It was the one where I was going
Uh, when I come out and I say um your son, you know, oh bear, you know the you know big bear or whatever. Oh, that's right
Yeah, and then me going, you know me the hunting. All right. Was that that scene? Yeah, was that it was that scene? Yeah, so, um
No, the whole crew kind of was like
You just feel like everyone goes is that how he's gonna do it?
Yeah, and then like the first thing he did like it was like before
He just like looked at me and he's like, I'm gonna do it much better than that
But I did that when I was just in um, I was just in hawaii doing an episode of magnum
One of the takes was just like that where it was just like
I just need to get it out and then I knew that gene was there and and gene goes
Don't worry about it. I already know right. So it's like that's just I don't know why I just need to
Hear it out of my mouth
In the environment. Yeah, and then it focal it makes everything focused for me and then I can do it
But anyway, I'm the same way though when we're shooting a scene
You know, it's never as good as it's gonna be when you're blocking it
And it's just like or or if I'm working with a non-actor that is not experience
I'll have them do it just to do it and then once you get that out. You're they're fine after that
Yeah, yeah, and you just have to get it the first one out and you go, you know, but like I was never worried
I know you weren't. Yeah. No, no one's worried. I'm just saying that
Do you think it would be because I have some other jobs that I'm doing and do you think
And I always get nervous the very first one. Yeah, and after I do like next time I do reservation dogs
You said yeah, you said you would but um, you see you fucking said you would
Promise me
That um, you think that if I do a new job and I'm rehearsing that I should throw that out there like listen
I'm I just needed to get it out. It's not the way I'm or do I just do it?
I mean, I don't know what to do in that situation. Honestly, I think people that don't
Don't even give it. You're all just say the words
Get it out and then it's like you don't have to worry about acting
It's just like they just want to hear how it's going to be sound how it's going to sound
Where you're going to be you don't have to you put like 20% on it and then you move on, you know, that's that yeah
Because I in my head. I'm like it has to be perfect. Yeah, no
And then when I think that because it's so new in my head
What are you looking at babe?
Why are you looking at me like retina retina retina like I have secondhand nerves
Because oh god, I'm just so glad you didn't get that pirate show
Because I know how nervous you were about doing the pirate accent. I know
And you would have collapsed on set. I don't think I would audition for that show the pirate show
Yeah, yeah, and you know, but I would I know number one here's a fact. Yeah, I've never been fired from a job
Ever right and I've always gotten it right. It's just the way to get there for me
It's a little different than other people. I see dudes that are just like
They don't give a fuck. Yeah, you know, I mean and it's like wow
I'm happy for them. But you're just so good in the show. Like, you know, like I killed it
Yeah, I killed it. I mean, there's because there's a thing like that character is based on real a real
people, you know, like when I went to a clinic growing up and and
The doctor there was a Filipino and he had a family this guy had a family and stuff
But like you're always like how the fuck did they end up in rural, Oklahoma?
Yeah
With a bunch of indians just surround and they and they kind of like, you know, they they adapt to the environment
And this is and the people and everything. Yeah, and so it was like totally based on a real person
and
You know, it's also heightened and whatever but like, you know, there was I feel I feel like you were a little
You're like, did I do an okay job? It was like, yeah, man. It was great. They was so easy came in and knocked it out
Yeah, it was very fast too. Right. It was very fast. But it's not that it's your notes were clear once you said your notes
I was like, um, I don't know if people want like to listen to
This kind of stuff. Do you think people do it? Yeah, yeah, who cares?
But the notes were very clear. It was like, um
Once I get you go your only note. What was your only note? Do you remember slow down? No
Just play it as tired as you can. Oh, that's what I said. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah slow it down. Play it tired
Yeah, just be tired and just and I go oh, I understand this guy. Yeah once I he said that I was like, I understand
Yeah, because he's like fucking fed up, right? Like, yeah, and I gotta say this too
Is we went to the your premiere. Okay and ask anybody
I've never
seen myself
In a premiere. I've always gone to the premiere and left
I can't watch myself. Yeah, right
This is the first premiere
Why force myself
right why
Because I looked at collie we're sitting there because I only thought you're gonna only air the first episode
And I knew I wasn't in the first episode. So we're just sitting there watching
I'm not in this one. So I'm just watching it. Oh, that's cool. Cool choice
I like the vibe. I like the vibe all the energy. I get it. I get it, right?
So it's over and I'm standing up the everyone club standing on my okay
I guess we're leaving and then all of a sudden they go into another one and I know I'm in that one
And I sit down
I sit down I go
Oh, no
Right where am I said to you and I turned to you and I go and you got state of
You got mad at me. Yeah, it's like don't embarrass me. Sit the fuck out
That's what she kept saying and you felt good though, right at the end. I mean, no after the first scene
I felt great. Yeah second scene, but then I left to go to the bathroom in the middle of your episode in the middle
Right and then wait
Yeah, yeah, and then I
Thought I took a long time, but then it's like I came back and I had two more scenes
So I just sat by the security guard stands stood there and watched it and forced myself and I went
Wow, it's pretty good. You know, I mean there because it got you know, when I care about
Is laughs. Yeah, and it got laughs
You know in the thing and what also helped me was the president of fact is that the big the white guy with the white hair
He's not the president. What is he ahead of marketing?
But the president was there too. I don't know who you're talking about. They're both white
They're all white. Yeah. Well, a couple of those guys. Yeah, I think they were one of them was the president
Okay. Yeah, one of the he came up to me goes
before
The thing started and he goes
Oh, you're the doctor a great job, man. You know, I mean that kind of thing. Yeah, and then afterwards those guys were like
So nice to me
Yeah, man, everyone was like it was it was gratifying for me. Yeah, because I cast bobby
and I pushed for it
And everyone was so I like I never heard a complaint
Everyone was very happy with bobby's
I don't want to talk about myself. No, no, no, no, no, but I also have like well, but I'm a big fan of the show
I know you want so like I've been I feel like I've been through the journeys of like
You know, like I'm just rooting from the side in Oklahoma
And hearing the auditions and you know, I hear about that. That's the bad friends
It's like the fucking commercial stories and all this shit
And so to show like to be able to cast them in the show
And you know, I'm a fan of comedy
So I would go to the comedy store when I would come to LA. I never lived here, but I would go to the comedy store
You know, that's where I first heard kirk fox who's also in the show. Yeah
Amazing. He's amazing. He's fucking great. And like no one can deliver a weird line like him quite like him. Yeah, yeah
And it's funny because and I would see him and his delivery is so different
And so he auditioned he just had a taped audition that came in and I cast him and you know, I saw
Bill burr a time or two and all these people that ended up in the show
Yeah, I'm bill burr do like a perfect oaky accent. He did a great oaky accent. I can't believe how good it was
He called me beforehand and he was like, yeah, I'm gonna he's like kind of try something out on you
I was like, yeah, and he's like boston guy. He was doing an oaky accent. He was like perfect. That sounds
Wow, fucking perfect. He told me bill goes
at some of the store after he got back and he goes, um
Man, that was the funnest I've had in on set and I go. Yeah, how cool are they? He's like that was so fun
That was amazing. Yeah, he said that on his podcast. Also. I had so many people writing me
I didn't hear your podcast where you talked about it until later
But everyone started writing me and was like bobby lee's talking about you on tiger valley or whatever
And so I went listen and if I would have known you were like writing fucking limes
around town
I would have like hung out with you. What are you writing line? Those scooters
Oh, yeah, yeah
Like I thought he was like seriously like reading his line. No
Every single phone call was of him FaceTiming me while he was on his way to a steakhouse
Dude on a line the best steakhouse. Yeah, it's the bull in the alley. Oh my god. That's a place
If you're ever in Tulsa, you gotta go the bull in the alley
And it's like, you know, if I would have known he was fucking I would have been cruising with him
I thought like well next time now. We know each other. I'm gonna leave this like method actor
All alone
He's like reading his lines probably wearing his watching doctors
Talking to locals it was so fun. So many people I heard later go like yeah, bobby lee was just writing
I was zipping around town and I just found how free it was because you have to understand
I have to because I was in quarantine. Obviously we all were for so long coven and all this
Oh, that was your first real. Yeah. It was my first real. I mean, I had been to hawaii a couple of times
But it's like, you know, I mean that that was very that was on lockdown and this and that
It was there's a restaurant you ate at that was great. Yeah, and then they had the little fangs. Yeah plastic things
Yeah, I want to go into now. Um
Oh, that was the jersey mics jersey mics. Sorry, babe. It's okay
Oh, that one had the fucking vinegar. Um, it's fucking Mike's way, baby. They're fire
And
Okay, I'm ready. I have some aqua. I'm fine. And what I'm fine. So what are you looking at?
I want you to choke. You don't want me to you look like you're choking. I'm fine. Okay. Um
So how did the show go go about like let me just see if I got the straight. Yeah
You're with okay. You met taika ytt
Let me see
20 years ago. Yeah in some in oh for sundance
Yeah, we were at the sundance labs or the sundance sundance film festival and they had some sort of like, you know a group of
native
Writers and producers. We were all showing films
We all had short films at the sundance film festival
And you know like anything like comedy or whatever or like the asian community the korean community
Once you you kind of have your your people right and we had like a like this little subgroup of
Independent filmmakers that kind of gravitated towards each other and it was indigenous filmmakers from across the world amazing and taika and I hit it off
Um, you know, I think the first time when we first met we didn't like each other very much
I thought he was an asshole and and and
I was from fucking the country and i'm here in l.a. Just like what's going on?
You know like yeah, and I remember we were at a party in the hills at some director's place
And I had had a 18 minute long rough cut of a short film
And I decided that it's a good idea. I was I was drunk and I was I decided it was a good idea
To stop the party
No, swear to god. I get chills when I think I'm embarrassed for you. I get chills
And I I get chills when I think about this you never do that. It was like up in these hills somewhere
How embarrassing and I was like
Fucking I said, hey, can I show my short film?
A rough cut a rough cut this guy had made like a night's tale or some shit like
They weren't like these were people that actually did shit and like they were like, yeah
Uh, you want to show a rough cuz yeah, I got a dvd and I pull out a fucking dvd and it was 18 minutes
This film ended up being 12 minutes by the end. All right. That's how much I bullshit that cut out. Yeah. Yeah
So I have an 18 minute cut. They don't have the balls. I don't know naive
They didn't even have the the right chords hooked up
So he had to go fucking find the chords stop the party find the chords to turn the music off
Rewire all his shit to play my dvd and i'm just sitting there with my drinks
Was like
Yeah, like we're looking at everyone's face while they sit there for 18 minutes tyke is over there
Just like what a fucking psychopath like
Wow, and like I I made people sit through that for 18 minutes and then I lost my car in the hills that night
I remember it was I had to have somebody drove me around till 4 a.m. Trying to
I woke up then it was like the best first LA trip
I woke up the next day in a seated position with like in-and-out wrappers around me
Just fucked like I had like wow just did spit me out. Did you get any feedback about your record?
Dude, they all were just nice, but in hindsight. I know
Yeah, they didn't like it and that was the most embarrassing thing that I could have done
That's like a um, we're at a party with like a bunch of comics and an open mic is there
And the open mic or stops. I was an open mic. Hey guys guys. I have a new I have a new 10 minutes
Right, and we're all like we're partying man. He's like no
Hi, so get me a mic. Yeah
Get me a mic get me some you know me a speaker
Right and then him setting it up and we're all standing there with our drinks
You know me and he does 10 minutes of like just okay shit, right?
But we're just like and then when he leaves
We that's all we talk about. Yeah that piece of shit. That is
You're the open mic or
For sure
Well, so taiko obviously didn't want to be friends with me
It took a while and then we were at Sundance together and then we became friends
And really just I traveled with him through New Zealand. We just became really good friends. We never tried to like
Worked I never you know, I not watched him
His star rise, right? Yeah, he got Thor all of this stuff and he was but I never like tried to get anything from him
We were just friends
I wanted to say Thor Ragnarok. I remember watching the first two thorns
The first two thorns were terrible. Yeah, right
Um, and then I were luckily what went to went to see it with my at the theater with my brother Steve
My brother was like, I don't want to watch that right and when we saw Thor Ragnarok
I don't I don't think taiko's listening but um
They're friends, but I want to say that um
I just that's because we had seen his other movies, right? But it's like especially you big taiko
That's my favorite movie of all time
The one with that was the 80s one boy boy. Yeah, that's not the one right? Yeah. Yeah, that's a good one. So, um
Anyway, that was what a great movie, but um, so you forgot what I was gonna say, babe
But so um Ragnarok Ragnarok was great. Yeah, but um
I have to let me get to back to the thing. All right, so you guys, um
How did this come about though you guys?
Reservation dogs. Yeah, so we
I thought there was I thought he had another sentence
Uh, and so we were there, you know, we were hanging out at his house. I I just started working in tv
I was an independent filmmaker. I was like, I was literally like, how am I gonna do this?
Shit, I would come out to la and they would be like, yeah native product native shit doesn't sell like
You know, do you got anything else like with a white lead? Maybe there's a white lead and there's a bunch of indians around him
And there's like, you know, it's like wind river, you know, we're where they're coming in to save the indians
Like could you do something like that? It's like man like and so
I was literally about to quit. I was about to start a nonprofit. You know, I was just like fucking give it up
And I got a tv job and then so I came out here for some meetings
Was hanging out with taika and he was like, hey, uh, I have an overall deal
We were like hanging out at his house having a tequila and he was like, I have an overall deal at fx
If you have anything like let's fucking pitch it to him
And so I was like, fuck, let's do it and we had read each other's scripts over the years and gave each other feedback
so we had similar styles and also like
New scripts that had never been made and we both had scripts about kids
And so we just kind of came up with the idea that night
And you know, I wrote it down sent it to him a couple days later
And I thought all he's busy. I'll hear from him in like a year
Like three days later my agents called me and they're like, what the fuck is reservation dogs? And I'm like
What are you talking about?
Now you just got to offer for a pilot and I was like, holy fuck, like that's this taika thing
And then I get a call from him and he's like, I just sold reservation dogs
And I was like how and he was like
A producer from what we do in the shadows. He told that Garrett Bosch about it
Garrett called fx was like, y'all should buy this and they were like, okay
Yeah, this is cool. I got never because they'd never heard anything about natives
That that that was fun. And also I've had way worse experiences than that. It's very rare
But like they had never heard anything about natives. It was funny
And so they were in and then we wrote the pilot and then the pandemic hit and you know, yeah
Wow, yeah happened fast. So that's how much power taika has
Fucking huge power. Yeah, he basically because I think at the remember at the premiere
He's you guys said that he called fx because you have 45 minutes. Is that true?
You guys have 45 minutes to make a decision. Someone said that. Yeah, who said that?
No, taika someone's I don't know who said that but it was either taika or Garrett Bosch said that to fx. Yeah, somebody said
You you have 45 minutes to make a decision or it's going to go somewhere else. Yeah to have that kind of balls
And that kind of power. I wish one day
Three minutes, yeah, but it's also like he didn't have to do that, you know, like I mean
I you know, I mean as you know, like you try to get these projects out and it's like you don't know if
Hollywood's gonna want to do anything, you know, and it's like
For taika it's like a fucking gift to me that he gave me, you know and to be able to like
Because everyone has thought that Indians are just fucking serious. Yeah, and just getting killed in front of tps
And like to be able to just be like, no man, we're funny like our communities are so funny and that's so funny
And that's all we do is laugh, you know, but like I mean as you could tell I'm super funny. Yeah
We got it
You know, so it's like to be able to do that
It was just like a big gift of that that taika gave me, you know
Yeah, I feel like I should name my next child after him
Yeah, but you know, I want to disagree with you. I don't think that I think that also he left and I never saw him again after we
So
He let me do the rest of the work. Yeah, but I think that um
You did the work to get into that position. Nobody's gonna go
Champion champion a guy just out of nowhere, right? It's like no this guy
It's like, you know, one time I got a call from Jordan peel
This is when in the after get out and all that stuff and he goes, you know, he threw me a bone
He goes, hey, I'm doing a commercial
Right
Um, obviously you don't have to audition. I want you in it. It's for me and Chelsea's wedding
And we'll pay you the most money I've ever gotten in anything I've ever done. It was like six figures
Just one day of work, right?
and he
And the next thing, you know, I'm on set. I'm doing it. My point is is that like, you know guys that
What's great about this business is guys that you're friends with that blow up and know the work that you've done in the
And the dedication and the years of struggle and this and that
You know, the good guys that blow up, right? We'll bring their friends up with them
You know, I mean like I hope in one day I'm able to do that for somebody. Yeah, we'll just to pull somebody up
You know, I mean, and that's what taika did, but it's not you deserve everything that you've gotten
Yeah, and it's like with the with the show. I mean my friends directed every episode my friends wrote every episode
So it was like being able to like pay that forward and bring up. It was all native writers
Yeah, that was all it's like all the writers were native and they were not just native. They were like
Cool, like I mean, I'm gonna say like they were never
No, no, no, but they were just like, you know, we're we're all essentially
The same we're all americans, you know, I mean and we're all we all dress the same
We're all into the same things. It's like at the end of the day
It's like there's just cool kids that I would that would be tiger belly fans or bad friends fans or or you know
I mean trust Tuesday fan. I mean, they're just people that you know me, but it was just like
Really cool that the director was native. Everyone was native, you know, I mean and the crew too the camera men were the all did love
Judd after love, right? And so
That's also what made me comfortable. I know they know me
You know, I mean, I knew them in that way too because they had so um, so, you know, the writer's room
We watched your what stand-up was available because you don't have I don't have any. Yeah. Yeah, but we watched what was available. Yeah, yeah
What?
Yeah, yeah, we didn't have much just early. Yeah, spiky hair and like yeah
Yeah, we watched those and then, you know, we would watch clips from shows that you were on. Yeah. Yeah, you know why?
Because we were writing this character. Yeah. Yeah, and so it was like, you know, I just wanted them to know who you were if they didn't know you
Oh, right because it was all zoomed so we would kind of show videos right right stuff just to kind of inspire us or whatever
Yeah, yeah. Well, I have that part unlocked. I know who he is. All right. Yeah, boy. I have dr. King unlocked out
Oh, yeah, no, he's coming back like I have so many ideas for dr. Kang
Yeah, yeah, I want him to I said I wanted to do a sex scene with dr.
Speaking of sex, yeah, yeah, what? Oh, um, there was a sex scene today at the parking lot of the rose bowl
And it involved me it's just this is the story story. Yeah
You know what? She was good. That wasn't good because I caught on to it
Out of nowhere speaking of sex is an obvious babe. All right, let's
Try to incorporate it in a different way. Okay. You're telling the story. I'm interested
All right, tell the story. I'm interested in it. There's no way because it's not is that the hype is not gonna match
It doesn't matter. You're doing it and you're gonna commit to it. So anyway, let's advice. All right. So sex scene sex scene
Yeah, go ahead. I want him to be in a sex scene
My dream, you know, I want him to be in a sex scene with Dave Batista. Oh shit. Okay
What
Is is Dave Batista native is it was he something you know, and when I
You know that show
That you really did an amazing job really do like giving me a good pep talk by the way before I pitched it
And it it worked in the sense that I was a little arrogant
You're too arrogant. I fucked her up. No. Oh sure. No every
Everyone that was involved with that pitch saying it was the best pitch they've ever heard
I was really like emotionally crumbling and when you were like
Like they need you. You don't need them. I was like, all right. I'm gonna care that made the world of difference
We have to think that way, you know, because I mean this I think that this business
Was built, you know
I mean, it's like when I first came out here
I I didn't feel like I belonged in any room
and
I had to and it was just like the way I grew up
Like if you're native, you're like be humble
Don't fucking talk too much
Listen to people. You'll learn. Don't try to own a room. And so go and so naturally I you as a native
I don't think that we've
We pitch well, we don't go into a room and
Yeah, man, you know, it looks like this like fade in, you know, like we don't do that
It doesn't come that natural and so but I had to really it took years of me going
Oh, and it's and then when the industry changed when all of a sudden diversity was cool
I realized like oh, they they need us. Like they need us now
And it really took all of that for me to have the confidence to go in and just be like
You know take it or leave it. Like what are you, you know, like you want this one?
Obviously, you don't want to be too much of a dickhead, but like yeah, I was having it
But you saved my life, especially that day because you said that literally hours before I went in
And I was like a mess before that I was like, okay
They don't they need you clever. They need you
They do but they're the whole business is built on them not letting you know that they need they need you
Right, they make you think that you need them, you know, like that's the whole business
And and I was talking to Amy Hill when I was in Hawaii and Amy was in marker Cho show
I love Amy back in the day, right? Yeah, just her and I were having dinner at um
That not pig in the lady, but piggy smalls
We're eating fried chicken at piggy smalls and I asked her I go
I mean, what is it like now because you were there since the 80s 90s, you know, and he goes she goes
It's just easier. It's it's unbelievable how easier it is and it's like
Or even in my own experience, I don't want to get emotional, but um
It's it for the last 20 years. I literally walked around life going
You know, please
Please right not knowing and they like I would doubt my own skill level
Like I you know, I always deep down inside know that I deserve more
Than I'm getting it's that feeling that like I know my skill set. I'm not Daniel Day-Lewis
But I know that in terms of comedy and what I bring to the table my face great left foot though
Babe
And you killed the moment
But you know, did you see some sex at the Rose Bowl?
You want to play games go ahead tell the story babe. Yeah
Rose Bowl Rose Bowl Rose Bowl Rose Bowl Rose Bowl
It's nothing. It wasn't it was so dumb. I didn't even want to say it on the podcast
I wanted to say it before but I went swimming at the Rose Bowl and because of covid
They don't allow you to change out of your clothes in the bathroom
So after my swim, I go to my car. I lift the the trunk and I'm doing a deck change
I'm getting into my dry clothes
Um, I wasn't very aware of my surroundings. I'm not really someone that really cares about nudity. So I accidentally
My towel dropped and when I looked ahead there was a man in his
There was a man just standing there and he looked right at my pussy
Like this pussy though, but then the weirdest thing happened his reaction was really
Not genuine. No, like genuinely artistic artist. He went into his car
He pulled out a flute and he started playing the flute in the parking lot
Fuck your girlfriend. It was like an old man. He looked right at my pussy pulled out a snake charmer. Yeah
You see the clip like moving
This worked on the show or he plays and the dick starts going
Oh, why was he doing that? I have no idea. So I don't know
Did he like keep his eyes locked on you?
Grab the yes, he did the whole time and then so my sister was there
Right, it's crazy. You drop right drop. I don't care. I'm just like that's fine. Yeah, he pulls out his flute
He looks first. He looks right
pauses pauses
Goes to his fucking car. Yeah reaches for his flute. Yeah, but the flute doesn't isn't just on the fucking passenger seat
It's the it's in the casing. He has to be right. So he has a nice. He flew it on
Oh, yes
It's different. It's different. All right, so he's just grabbed
I'm locked down, right?
And he's so and then you still have your pussy out
No, I don't have a pussy out. Why is this still out?
What are you doing get the food out get the food out
Honestly, so he leaned on his car this way and he was playing and he was looking at me like this
That is insane. That's that sounds like
That sounds like as juliana. Oh really ask my sister. Oh, wow. That sounds like the rooster on the old robin hood
He's like playing like how does that? Yeah, how does that sound like a disney movie? Yeah, that's amazing
Yeah, so that's what happened to me today. And so you pull your stuff out and did you and he leans on the car in place
Yeah, and he's looking like giving me direct eye contact. Can I ask you another? I wish I could meet him
Yeah, I want to be but can I ask you another question right?
I didn't feel violated by the way. Were you rude like after he was done playing. Did you give him a applause break?
I threw him a five
No, babe, I fucking I bent over gave him a full
Full shot from the back. He took the flute stuck it in your foot. And then I played with his skin flutes
Oh, if you would have if you would have set that story up
And said finish it. I would have never thought that he would have grabbed a flute played a flute to you
I I'm gonna say um, there are a lot of crazy things that happen in my life
But that's a memory. I'll I'll keep in my heart forever because I didn't feel violated either. I was confused. I was like, all right
Yeah, you know, we're having a concert. You know, yeah, just a flute player. I don't have a feel about that
Maybe he was happy but sad too
I mean, maybe he was already going to play the flute
Yeah, and then you're putting that's a that's a good point. What if that's his thing?
At a swimming pool parking lot the timing was that's his spot. What if that's a spot at
He does that at noon two o'clock every Tuesday Monday. He plays the flute there
You just happen to be your vagina with you're not special. He's a home right now, baby
He's at home like she thinks that I was playing
Hey guys show so now you have another thing
I don't know if we should announce it, but you have another big movie or thing or it's been announced res ball
Oh, yeah, so what is that?
It's a it's a movie that I wrote with my friend Sydney Freeland that
LeBron James's company partnered with us to make it and they're we're making it in netflix
Wow
Did you meet LeBron?
He's probably not even read the script
Yeah, like yeah, I know people probably read it or whatever. Yeah, I haven't met him yet. I hope so
Yeah, so it's funny with those production companies. They say it's like
It's like I had this one thing seven seven months ago
It's Ben Stiller's production company, right? And they want to talk to you about this movie
Yeah, right? So you think you're going to talk to Ben Stiller, right?
And it's just like nine white people that Ben still has no idea that you are
Yeah, right. It's it's when you're big enough like LeBron James. You just have people doing shit for you
I feel like tyke is that big
But because I'm his friend. Yeah, he has to hang with me. You know, it's like no
No, no, no, not that he doesn't like me. Yeah. Yeah, like I feel like if it was anyone else
There wasn't close to him
He wouldn't have to spend as much time with me, you know, because I mean it's crazy watching your friend blow up like that
I will say that, you know, because you know, he's just a Maori kid from New Zealand. You know, it's unbelievable
And so watch because he's a genius. Yeah, and so watch
Because I mean like we were hanging out first time we hung out
When we really connected
We were talking and we have similar backgrounds
And the song under pressure came on love it nice and without planning it
He and I stood up in the room
And sang it to the whole party and performed it and it was you know, David bow
I don't forget who was who who was singing which part. Yeah. Yeah, but it was just like funny to this day
People talk like people like oh under pressure went on you should sing it, you know
I did that at a move at a party at a party. It's the same party. You showed your little move. No, no, no
I'd learned not to be all guys. All right at that point
And um, were there other celebrities at the party? No, no, no, it was all just natives. Oh, well cliff curtis
Do you know cliff curtis is he's a Maori actor? He was in the movie sunshine
I'm sure you that movie sunshine the sci-fi. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
Silly and murphy. Yeah, exactly. I love that. Yeah. He's in everything. He always plays like Kelly and murphy
There's so many races. Yeah. Yeah, he plays every race. Oh that guy's amazing. He made us dinner that night. Oh, he did
Yeah, he had like a
Maori sort of clothing on and just made this like amazing meal for us. And that's the night I love actors like this guy
Yeah, he's so good. He's played everything. You don't really, you know, he's so good
The sad thing is can he do that anymore? Like will they let him play
Other races might get cancelled. All right. What is he really? He's native. He's really native. He's Maori. What's with Maori?
Maori
Oh my god, Maori Maori
I'm a man. I'm a man that doesn't know much Maori from New Zealand. That's what taika is
Is that so taika's a Maori?
Ma Maori babe. M-a-o-r-i. Why are you getting so angry with me? Because there's no Maori. There's no Maori
Maori, let me just ask you about Maori people, right? Are they indigenous to New Zealand? Yes
So they were there before the white people came. Oh, yeah. All right. Fucking just like the Aborigines in Australia
Yes, all right. That's what the Maori watch that whole thing on Kathy Freeman. Remember I made you watch it
They do the haka. They fucking yell all right. Yeah the all blacks, right? Yeah
Yeah, so um and then in America you also let me can I ask you stuff like please ignorant stuff about please
I love it. Why? No, I love your question
So, um, let me ask you a question and this is stuff. I don't know much about. All right. No, I love it
Is is that obviously there's a variety of different
styles of
Natives genres of native different styles from different regions because back then they didn't have locomotives
Back in the day you had horsies
And that was your prime mode of transportation. Yeah horsies, right? Okay. I mean the Spanish brought them over. Yeah
Oh, so before before Spanish brought them brought horsies over you guys ran everywhere eagles backs and shit
Yeah, so you have different kinds for different regions, right? So you have Inuits. Yeah, you have Navajo. I'm seminal
You're seminal and muskogee creek muskogee creek. You have mohawk Ian mohawk mohawk, right?
I don't think I don't know. I don't know when Cherokee Cherokee Chickasaw Choctaw Choctaw Cato, right?
So Pawnee Pawnee fucking Lakota. So what do you want? Let me ask Cheyenne
Do you think that back before the the colonial people came and and destroyed this country, right?
You know, is that am I gonna get in trouble for saying? No, they destroyed it. They destroyed it. We were just having sex. We were eating fruit
But do you think that back in the day before they came if you guys had the internet that any of this would happen?
No, because you guys would email each other and and banded together
We'd have been like, yo
Here's the shit and there were people that tried to say that like there was a guy to come so that went around to different tribes
It was like look man
The white people are coming. Yeah, we got to fucking stick together and we got to fucking get together and fight them
But it didn't happen. But if you could
Well, you got to also understand like when they first came it wasn't like a fast thing
It wasn't like one day they showed up and then there was a big battle and then there was cleveland
It was like when they first got here
Yeah, sickness came with them. Right. We were like they didn't wash their ass
And like we're getting sick. Yeah, everybody's getting colds, you know
And so something like 90 of the indigenous people were died or wiped off from smallpox planet
The 90 of the indigenous people in the americas were dead
Because of disease after the first like 100 years. Oh my god. It's so sad. Yeah, so then
because
Oh, sorry, I shouldn't eat that sandwich. But um, what I would have done. So yeah, so disrespectful
Gone to different tribes and and and people and said let's band together
Also, another thing. I think if you had gunpowder, oh, yeah, it would have been different
Yeah, I mean that's another fucked up thing is just the type of weapon
Can you imagine though like you're sitting there?
and like
You're fucking hanging out like my people, right? We were like by florida and georgia and you're just hanging out and all of a sudden
There's fucking boats and the distance like what the fuck is that?
It would be so petrified. It would be so scary because you've never seen someone that looks like that
Oh, yeah, and they're like all of a sudden gods are coming
You know, it's like that's all you would think about is like their spirits or like something, you know
It's right. Yeah, or because they're pale and they're also probably taller or no
Yeah, do you think they're taller? Maybe. Yeah, they're all kind of everybody's looking at georgia
Yeah, I think if they all look like him they would be like, oh fuck it
Can you produce that? Produce our podcast
There are probably ones that look more terrifying
If it was like a thousand of these they'd be like, oh, just imagine those boats approaching. Oh, so scary
Like what the fuck so fucking scary and then it's like and then all of a sudden they get off and you know
At first I think they were trying to be cool. It was like, oh, hey like let's trade
You know, I was like, okay, and then all of a sudden you like catch a cold that night
But do you think that was on purpose? They just what I mean, they didn't purposely get you sick
They just happened to carry this
Well until they realized they could get you sick and then they started giving out smallpox blankets
and and purposefully killing
Tribes of people, you know, like that was after they learned that we didn't have
The antibodies to kill these diseases and once they realized like oh, we can kill them in another way
They started handing out smallpox blankets and saying like, oh, we're you know, stay warm. Yeah, no Pfizer
Yeah, I have two questions for you. Yeah
Do you hate the movie
Last of the Mohicans? No, I love it
Well, I know
But to the last of the mohican is a white dude
They always make whenever they make a movie like the last samurai last of the mohican. It's always a white dude
He doesn't make it angry. Yeah, but you have to like realize that we had no movies to grab hold of all that
Like we had no representation
Most of them were John Wayne just shooting us off a horse. So like all of a sudden it's like what like
Daniel Day-Lewis is white. Sure
But like he was also adopted so we can get by that because we did adopt people and so then you're like with that premise
Let me ask you about that premise, right?
Let's just just hear me out. All right. All right. So it's like
We know what the white man is doing to our land, right?
So a couple of native guys are walking around. They see a fucking white baby
You think they would adopt it or did they would have done something else?
No, they didn't in the movie they adopted but in my head when I'm watching historically they did adopt
No, they would. Yeah, they did. Yeah, I don't know if they're like ripping up my plan
I would do something else like throw it like a football or whatever. You know, I mean just punt it
Yeah, but there's all these accounts of like white kids being
Oh, that kidnapped and adopted and then and then they would never want to go back
Like like then the white people would come and like steal them back
And then they would escape to go back with the natives because they would rather live with the natives. Oh, that's cool
Because we treated them better. No, I ask you another question. Um, but last time I he can see it's a good movie though
It is pretty good. Yeah, and one of the best actors of all time. Yeah, you know
No, do not and also it may there's a lot of characters in it that made them
Native people look and that moment where the white girl just jumps off
Oh
So hard and west duty who's in reservation dogs. He's the bad motherfucker mogwa in there
There's like, you know, he's fighting at the end. Oh, that's right. Well, he's like a comedic character in our show
That's right. That's him. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't fucking realize it
I want to be so much nicer the guy when it's him and then so let me ask you this
I like I'm really so, um, there's a theory, right?
That most people think that
Native people came from Asia over the years your mom believes this oh the land bridge, right?
The bearings right right that Asians crossed the Bering Strait came down Alaska, Canada
And infiltrated the Americas, right? And that's how native people were, you know, I mean
But there's another theory where it started in America and they went the other way
So Asians Chinese are really, um descendants of native people. What's your theory?
If you look at my
I think we went up that way, but I also think it was both ways
I think I mean you could go hang out in New Mexico
Yeah, I'm fucking wear the right clothes and people would be like cousin like yeah. Yeah cousin. Well, also when I go also go
I've been you know me on done shows at reservations or to casinos and stuff and I've had native people come to the show
And there's always a like a sort of a familiarity like uncle uncle. Yeah. Yeah. There's always a good vibe
Yeah, I mean about it and when I was in Oklahoma shooting your show. I was literally because I had I had these fucking
Such weird ideas about Oklahoma
Yeah beforehand like it's like ultra right wing. Yeah ultra like
sterile and then
When I was yeah, what was your dipping around
The town and looking and talking to people and this and that they're just people just there's hipsters there
And cool fucking people and I just like the whole like Oklahoma vibe
It's like and I didn't realize that I this is how dumb but
I didn't think there was gonna be a lot of natives there, but I guess that's where a lot of natives are. Yeah. What did you think?
I thought it was just a bunch of truck driver. I mean, what do you think?
What'd you think when you got there like oh
Whenever there are places where I go and I'll just think I'll never come back here again
But there are places jillian dressed you too. I think yeah, she's great
And there are other places that I go and I'll go on
Um redfin. Yeah, whenever I'm in a town and I hit on redfin and I want to look at property
Oh, yeah, that means I would live here. Yeah, so I look at how much the houses are this and then not that I would buy a house there
I'm just saying that you should yeah, but it's like it's a really cool place and that what's that a steak place
I think it was bull in the alley. Well in the alley, right? What's great about it is you zip down
You go down this alleyway and there's no sign. Yeah at all. So then I was like asking people
What the fuck is you know, I'm screaming. Yeah. Yeah, I don't want to fucking know what this right?
And they're right there. It's like this kind of barn green door. You walk in and I've had
a piece of bacon
What's so funny?
Because I heard the podcast where you said it was the best piece of bacon you've ever had. That's all he did
He said he yelled or something. He said he yelled out loud. I've had bacon all my life. All right
I would have to say I'm a bacon man. I'm a Korean. So what does that mean a pork spam? They're so good at pork. Yeah. Yeah
Oh, he said pork
When I saw you coming up on fucking my driver, I'm like, look at that body
You have me I would have to even say
My body the first time that I talked the first time I've talked talked to it was great because he goes um
It was the first time he'd saw me not on a camera and he goes, uh, you're native. You're your body
Like when you walk around you you live in Tulsa or uh, or Oklahoma Tulsa, I mean
It's Tulsa, Oklahoma. Wait, wait, so my bad. Let it ride. Let it ride. I'll let it ride
Yeah, oh, is you live in Tulsa? Yeah. Are you like when you walk around people know who you are?
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you're kind of like a mayor like the mayor you're sort of like, uh, yeah
But I know so um next time I'm there, um
Is there any way you one night we could eat somewhere?
I would love to take you out. I mean like, you know casting you I'm gonna say something serious right here
Because I just like fucking them fan, you know, I'm like a big fan of you
We're friends now though. Yeah, and I wrote that part for you
Part you know, not just because I've heard your struggles. Yeah, but like because I'm a fucking fan
It's like and you know also like the acting like I liked your acting a lot
and I wanted you to put in that I wanted you to put you in this show
And writing for you was super easy. That's why I added like San Diego
You know, like all this stuff was in there that was like totally catered to you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
And my hope was that Bobby would read the part
and go
You know, but also I'd heard you know, he had also said that he doesn't read
The scripts and so I was like, man, I hope he reads this because like I think he'll know
That I am a fan of his yeah, I should have read it. Um, but you have to defend myself at the time
I had so much going on right
I did I had so much going on and it's like I do audition for things and anyone listening right now
That's a show around whatever I audition it's at that time. I was going out of the country and I was stressed out
Anyway, um, you want to hear something that's going to break your heart. Yeah
Wait, wait, tell me first. Yeah, whisper it out. No, it's not that big of a deal. What is it? It's not
Bobby is not a fan of heart-worn highways. Oh, really? Yeah, what's heart-worn? How are the documentary the documentary with
Guy Clark and Guy Clark
You hated fucking stupid that you said, I'm sorry. Why did you do that?
Shut the fuck up. I was like, hey, watch this. No, no, no
She goes she this is what she says she goes
I love that move. I I'm sure it's great. Me too
You fucking idiot
You fucking throw me on the bus defend yourself. Yeah, I'm gonna differ myself right now
We just said we were friends anyone that says anyone any asshole that says not you but yet
Anybody that says hey, you want to watch a documentary on youtube? It's like in my thinking. It's like, oh
They can't release it anywhere else. That's why it's on youtube. No, I just said it was so it's old
I know I'm just saying I'll watch it if I can stream it on netflix hulu or fucking amazon
Or I can buy it on itune distribute. I refuse to watch it a documentary on lo-fi
But you love music. I love music
I'm sure I'm gonna love the documentary, but I'm fucking spoiling that way get me hd, baby
Because you were like, you know, one of your favorite ones is david burn, right?
I love david burn. I love david burn. So that whole that whole what would you what would you call that music documentary talking? Yeah
Or the other one with stop making stop making sense stop making. Yeah, or the one with lcd sound system
I love that one. Yeah. Yeah, so I was like you have to watch heart warren highways
Yeah, and I guess what I bought you know, stop making sense on itunes
All right, and I bought that fucking lcd sound system on itunes and I watch it in hd
If your heart warren har har
That's the other thing about bobby is that he's a cinema fan. I've learned from yes, like it's you know
It's not just comedy bro. I just saw re I rewatched. I'm sorry. Yeah, but I rewatched. Um
Ikuru. Oh, yeah, I watched that the other day. Oh my god. Fucking go fucking and I've heard you talk about that movie
And I just rewatched yo himbo. Mm-hmm one of the and you know what also was a great one. I thought it was yo jimbo, but
Fucking bad at language
Seriously, you might be right. No, no, I don't know. I call it yo himbo. No, I think you're right. Okay. Well, you know
You're ancient. I know I believe
I was just making fun of anyone listening. You got it either you himbo though
What I loved about it is I know it's a chorosal film and it's
fucking
Funny. Mm-hmm. The characters in it are so
Fuck you ever you've ever seen it so funny. There's so many moments of just we like that one guy with the face that walks in
Oh, yeah, he's so funny and then like I saw hidden fortress
You've talked about being there
One of my favorite movies of all time
The reservation dogs is like like because I'm such a howl ashby fan. Oh, he's great
Taika is too. Yeah, we'll talk about that a lot about the humor and the and the and the emotions sort of with each other
You know and like howl ashby was like a big reference and I love being there. So we have
We always said that if we had a kid, he'd his name would be trancy. Yeah, trancy from trancy gardener. Oh, yeah, exactly
Yeah, so beautiful those movies and they're human though. They're like funny. They're like emotional, but they're human
Yeah, I think um
You know
I don't want to I don't want to say it
Because I'm gonna I'm going to say something that's kind of gross. So I got the thing up. So let me ask you another question
Um, are you did you your plans tonight?
No, what are you gonna do tonight?
Nothing. Do you want to eat with us? Yes
That was it. Yeah, it's not going to be fancy. Tulsa bacon. Is it like sugar face or something like that? Like Korean
Okay, yeah, yeah, let's do Korean
What yeah, he's an L. He has his own car. So it's like he should be around here. He has a driver. I have a driver
The driver can't make it to k-town
What's the problem?
It's so far away. Let's just do something around here. It's not that far. It's 15 minutes k-town. We'll talk about it later
I'm not a ribbiting punk. Yeah, we'll talk about it later. I'll fight about it later. Okay. I'll fight about it later
Yeah, yeah
Yeah, what are they arguing I'm just saying that let me just finish this argument real quick
We'll talk about what we're gonna eat afterward. You know what I wish
You know, my my biggest wishes here we go is that
One day
You play the flute for my pussy
Could dr. Kang do that in susan? Yes. Oh my god
Flute flute pussy
One day. I'll do it. I know how to play the flute. You do
I played the flute that was the first instrument I learned
And it was towards a pussy. Yeah
Well, dream might be realized after all go headgill. Also, this is her. I how old was this picture?
It's a really great picture of you. Oh shoot. I can't. Oh, don't even put the I'm against. Oh my god
You look so different. I was like
That looks like a native woman
I was telling someone the other day literally one of the worst photos sessions I've ever taken was this
And this was actually my IMDb photo forever. I didn't know how to change
Bobby has had so many emotional meltdowns over my IMDb photo. I can't take it down and it takes forever
Which one is it? It's the one you have to be a hacker. I'm like doing this weird break dance break dance thing
I hate it. You have to be a hacker
And I've changed it like I've literally called him and be on the phone just be like look
He's having an emotional breakdown. They won't let me even on IMDb pro. Oh that that that oh man
That's my IMDb. I thought I changed it for you, sweetie, but I was unsuccessful
What trailer is that? I don't know love
No
That's the trailer that's playing on your thing
What?
I'm not in that. Anyway, take that out. I hate that photo. Look at that. We grabbing my penis. We'll change it. We'll change it
Is that embarrassing my photo? No, it's not that bad, but it's like a younger. It's like the older you
I'm a nude vibe. Yeah, you're a new totally new vibe. I have a new better vibe a way better vibe. I think yeah
The beanie. Oh, yeah, I'm not playing that way. You know, I'm you don't have gel in your hair spiking. All right, these little jeans
so
Do the unhelpful advice unhelpful advice with bobby kalina and sterling
Hello tiger belly. I am a 30 year old asian american woman and I've never been in love
I've never been in a serious relationship my whole life. I have a problem with finding a man
I get asked quite often, but every single man that has entered my life has been unpromising
A little backstory. I grew up similar to bobby where my dad was a rage monster
I know I have commitment issues due to my childhood trauma, but I also developed a high standard for men in my life
I always grew up fearing I would meet a man like my dad and turn out to be just like my mom
So when I see this it's a red flag for me
Do you guys think I should lower my standards in men and double down in hopes of falling in love?
Or if I don't lower my standard, I'll just be single the rest of my life. I think it's a reframe
So the issue is that she
likes higher standard. Well, it's it's
I missed the first part
Wait, you get it one time now you gotta go off
I
Think you should just reframe the way you're saying lower your standards even the way you use the word
Unpromising I think that there's promise in everyone you meet
But if you go into the room thinking that he's got to hit all the boxes
You're not really allowing yourself or allowing, you know a relationship to ever
You know flourish from there because you're like, well, he's not checking these boxes. So you're not being open
Um, and that's really all I have to say about that is that you you can't have these like
No, you gotta no, here's the thing, babe. It's like no if if I were to just on paper on paper, you're disastrous
on paper
right
Wait, wait, wait, wait on paper. I'm disastrous. Yeah. Oh really? Oh really? Okay, so
Oh, let's hit podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. When I first met you even then even then it was bad. It wasn't bad
I pay for every meal based on my standards basically. Oh, yeah, I'm not fucking Michael Phelps
No, even like the height standard of like yeah before you didn't meet
Yeah, but you shouldn't have that. Why was that even in your thing? That's so shallow. That's what she might have
Five four is not a thing exactly
I'm trying to say that I when I had coffee with you
I took that criterion book and I was like fuck this. I like this guy. Whatever amalgamation of red fat
Have a fucking
She said I was handsome
And he's got you on the height what I'm saying is this
Look, I didn't do anything. I'm your friend. I can't shoot a movie. His butt is like lava
Season two, babe, season two
My bad
Look at these muscles
Kidding, I love you, but um what I'm saying what I'm snow what I'm saying
Why are you? I'm a pretty good girl. I'm gonna what I'm saying to this lady is this all right
Don't listen to her. Look at Sterling and I okay
We're we're we look like, you know, it's an old joke handsome. No, we look like
Garbage bag full of oatmeal. That's what our body
But oatmeal is healthy for you. Yeah, right. We're just like globs, right? But we're creative. We're fun. We have funny laughs
Right and we we support each our lives through art, right being creative, right?
So it's like, you know, you got to change what you think you want
Yeah, except except do not settle on his character if his character is shit
That's the one thing you should never settle on but in terms of looks his job
Like tiny little things here and there. Yeah, absolutely lower your standards because you you'll meet so many
I don't know. You're just opening up yourself to people like bobby
Who's an amazing
wonderful creature
Challenge talented creature. Yeah
Let me ask you something. Yeah
When you look like that, you know, I mean on the photo
Back then and you were probably struggling. Were you struggling as an artist back then? Yeah, no, right, right?
Did you get girls then? Yeah
Nice guy. Oh, you're nice. You've always been confident. Yeah, nice guy. Yeah, you're a confident guy. I'm fun. Yeah, you're fun
You gotta be fun
I love this guy. Yeah, so any any other any other ones?
Uh, a lot of them are honestly for reservation dogs people just saying you were awesome in it and episode two
seriously
I'm not kidding. It's a hit like seriously my twitter is full of it. Yeah, it's it's the first time I've had
friends same my age
Text what do you mean like they're writing you about it? Well, it's it's more like
People my age are watching it because a lot of things that he's been on it's just either not what my
My friends are watching they're not interested in it like every
Friend group I've had there's one person who was like, holy shit. Why didn't you tell me bobby was in resdogs?
My friends from hawaii my close friends my every single person my age is watching it and I really really love that
It's people like you
Who need to make shit that people actually my age want to watch but here's another here's the compliment
That was the best. What do you remember the story that I told you? Yeah that when I graduated from high school
There was one guy from AA who was against the fence and he came to see my graduation. Yeah, he
FaceTime not face time Facebook messaged me. Whoa, and he goes it's been 25 years
Does that talk to you or whatever?
But I just have to say you because you were great in reservation. Yeah, my point is is that
Dudes I haven't seen in 30 years
No, that's me. You know
You know are reaching out, you know and her neighbor and this Saturday seriously and this Saturday. I'm going to I'm trying to go to my
40th 30th my 30th high school reunion in poway. Yeah, it's in San Diego
and
I think I just shit my pants
But um, it wasn't an accident. I saw you push. Yeah, you really I saw your stomach move
Anyway, why are you grabbing your dick like that? The shit doesn't come out that whole
Can I why can I tell you something? It could be making it
Because that would be a fistula. That's not good. Okay, so you might have to cut this out
Yeah, but I sometimes the tip of my dick smells
And I figured out why
Continue God has hurt my heart. I know I figured out why
What talk about horrible on paper. This is why all right. I'll tell you why
I'm going to use this little guy. All right. Oh, okay
So
All right, except mine has bigger eyes. So, um, let's say this is the head of my penis, right?
Yeah
Now what's happening is the skin around my penis is engulfed it
What do you mean?
Right. So like like it's like it's you grew foreskin. Yeah, I grew foreskin over it. I have to undo it, right?
So during the day, right
It it cups it like this. You're not circumcised. No, I am circumcised for some reason why the skin around
Yeah, the skin around my shaft. It's unnatural. Get around my shaft is like gotten loosey. Okay, right?
Maybe I can get like a like a lizard's tail. Just yeah
Not really a lizard, but anyway, and so it's engulfed it, right?
And I think the sweat and buildup and this and that has made it smell. What weird babe
That's called magma. And if you knew anything about being uncircumcised, you'd know that you're supposed to clean that area
How many times all the time that it's there. Anyway, thanks for listening to
Check out reservation docs. He got red check out reservation doc. Check out. Um,
Sterling has a bunch of project coming out. So we we, um,
Obviously season two
Season two season two probably gonna happen. Dr. King. Dr. King is gonna happen and uh, honestly, dude, um
Not only is it cool knowing you and I feel like we're friends now, but um, I want
To thank you for inviting me on to your show. It's it was fun
It's like I love being a part of something that's special and that's amazing and thank you so much, man
I had a blast doing it. I love the crew. I love those kids
And, um, thanks a lot, man. I really appreciate it. Yeah, thank you so much. And, um, give Sterling
Yeah, you're kind of always do this and anything you ever want to do promote
You're always invited to my podcast. Okay. Cool. All right, give him a round of applause. Fucking amazing. Thank you
That was amazing. I have to take a shit real quick and don't okay. Yeah. Yeah. All right. I have to take a shit with my number five
Oh
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