TigerBelly - Ep 325: John Cho & The Star Trek Future

Episode Date: December 1, 2021

Bobby balloons. John stays the same. We talk Harold & Kumar, Sulu's husband, Bobby's body passion, Johnny Cha, MadTV, and the new age for us. Support us by supporting our sponsors!Se...e Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening ad-free on WONDERY PLUS Guess what boys and girls these are exclusive to us. These are the cutest shirts. I think we've ever made I think so too This one says uh Fight night. Well on top it says let me just defend myself for a second. That's what you say a lot. Yeah Yeah, it's one that's a dope. It's um is a premium shirt It's a soft wash and we dyed these ourselves and the material is made out of pure angel wing 100% and for it to get it you have to die and come back Mm-hmm. You have to die kill an angel come back. It's a whole thing. So a lot of more anyway
Starting point is 00:00:34 We went through lengths to get to you guys right so congratulations to you for for getting the opportunity To purchase to participate in buying this get your merch at slept kingdom com Weirdest time to wing I know but whenever I see your face. I want to wing man. Do you really? Yeah, dude You have a cute face dude. Thank you. Yeah, yeah real cute face. My hair is really magnificent. Hey, fuck you man Don't try to fuck him in his own house Have we started we're gonna I'm told as an Asian we're not supposed to wear this color, but Oh, I can't wait for this. Yeah, no, what it's gonna be there's history. There's not oh, you know, we don't have we him And I don't like we hang on. Can I just before we start what?
Starting point is 00:01:38 No, don't be rude. Do you have don't be rude right now? Yeah, Moco. What's Moco? Haha, is that right? You know who's a huge fan of this podcast and of you overall is Daniela Panetta who's Yeah, yeah Can I just say something? Do you know how I know this? No, I don't because that what's that magic magical Shin Lim no, there's another magical long-haired Japanese DJ who I'm friends with Steve. I okay eat Texas The magical that this long-haired magical fucking DJ
Starting point is 00:02:13 Texts me during the fucking cowboy B-pop premiere. Yeah, and he goes Is this still your number? I go. Yeah, he goes One of the stars of this movie is a big fan of yours. I go John. I know She's like no the girl. Yeah. Oh good the girl, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What's her name? Daniela Panetta? We should have her on Oh, yeah, you're a big fan of her. I'm like Trump. If you like me, I like you. Yeah. Yeah You're gonna kill me if I don't tell you this but you do have a booger and as a girlfriend. Can you take it out? Yeah, I would try to
Starting point is 00:02:53 Why are you making eye contact with you? I had a friend named James Kim in high school and he He had one year. He decided he was going. He was he wanted to know how many boogers he produced Pickle jar oh by the bed wait, so he would dry him roll them and that's how you roll them and toss him in the Jar, I have logistical questions about this. Okay. Go ahead. He it's not him But it's not it's not me, but my thing is sometimes they come out very wet and you could you could technically Roll three out of one, right? There's no way to measure unless you made them all equally equal amount. No, no, no
Starting point is 00:03:35 You're thinking you're thinking number of boogers. He's thinking mass Oh, I'm measuring mass weight. Yeah, and when you're when you're counting boogers. It's always mass Yeah, but I don't know if you know this John's right versus booger is a very very, you know slippery slope What snot versus booger? Yeah. Yeah, you pull out something and it's like is this but what you don't realize is that? I don't know why we're talking about this right now because we have a fucking star here But like um, yeah, let me dive in it dries. Oh I know okay. It fucking dries like ice. No, it does ice dry Yeah, yeah, it dries a glue. This is a this is a cliche this domestic abuse
Starting point is 00:04:17 Oh, you're right. You're right. I should be kind. I know you're right. You're right, John It is cut it out. All right. I'm gonna bring him all right Let's do start the thing so we can I can bring him up. Yeah Someone give me paper towel. It's a little booger. Booger on her hand because you made her a picket. Don't all right. This is disgusting. It's chaos Five four three two and a wee wee wee wee wee Welcome to another episode Of tiger belly Today on today's program
Starting point is 00:05:11 We got this guy we got this guy we got that guy We got this woman And now I'm going to bring up our guests now don't fucking say shit because this is gonna be a long fucking intro bro All right. Don't feel weird about it too. Okay, Bobby Lee Bobby Lee. All right. So here we go Number one. Um, I've known him for 20 years. It's got to be that's that's excessive No, but John. What was what was Harold the Goomar? It was oh, yeah, like 16 years ago. No wait 2004. I'm gonna say to the So 18 years 18 years. So I was close before wow
Starting point is 00:05:50 I've known you for almost 20 years. Damn. Wow. Right. So how I met this next guy. Well, let's throw out his credits He's on a new television program Right on netflix and I saw the first half of the first episode and look fucking I I didn't know who's out yet Yeah, so today I was like, John's coming. I should watch a little you know me That casino bit in the beginning was so great. I'm going to finish the series, right? You don't have to Okay, okay, I'll stop. I'm sorry I'm going to leave. No need. I know for almost
Starting point is 00:06:23 Who's the young in this situation? I definitely am 100% the young he acts like a little baby He's a little baby. Also, um, here's so he's a talented guy. Um, I honestly believe I'm better looking. Okay I honestly believe that. What do you think? I believe you believe that I believe I believe you believe that I know but what do you believe? I still believe that you believe You're a fucking asshole. I love your work Go ahead, babe
Starting point is 00:06:56 I like fat boys, so I'm always okay. That's enough You fucking asshole Round of applause for john show everybody clap your hands Hi, john. Hi, how are you? Thanks for coming here. Oh, I'm so glad to be here. I'm so glad to see you, man Um, it's been a long time. It's been so long. I've been out of the country for a year. I miss americans I miss you in particular though separate americans It goes me and then americans
Starting point is 00:07:25 Yeah, yeah good good good. Yeah. Well, let's say, um Um, will you probably miss your family more though probably when you're out of the country? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Well, that feels good. Thank you so much john. Um He's been out of the country, but I have to say you and I met um I believe we met and just don't get I could have it wrong during the screen testing for harold and kumar Remember it was me you cal. There was another indian guy I remember that day where we kind of switched off back back and forth Obviously, you got the part because you're better looking more talented. My point is that I believe that's when I met
Starting point is 00:08:06 I remember standing next to him Oh, so we were auditioning Against one another and not I my memory was that we met as when you were cast as Kenneth but No, this is my memory and maybe both of our memories can come up with the truth. Yeah, okay Okay, okay So this is how I tell the story. I tell it where I I auditioned for that part 10 times
Starting point is 00:08:33 Me too. Yeah, right. So we read for a lot and I think the last day They had paired us right in this that you probably forgot about that But this is what I do believe I believe that you got me that job For Kenneth because I wasn't in the movie And I remember getting a call and my agent said something like I think John wants you in the movie or something like that, right? But that's I I've always believed that that you got me that part
Starting point is 00:08:59 You know what? I you know, I hadn't thought about it in so long But I believe that I don't want to say that I got you the role but I think I wanted you in the movie Yeah, yeah, and that's when I knew you were an ally Oh Because I'll tell you this Okay Oh All right, I'm gonna tell you this right now
Starting point is 00:09:23 What Can I switch with you or what all right? So I'm gonna tell you something right now, dude Go right. I've and I told this to these guys before When asian dudes make it or they're in stuff I get jealous Right, but for some reason When I see you in things like when I saw you when searching And I've seen how many times I've ever seen those
Starting point is 00:09:47 I'm gonna get up sit down sit down. I'm gonna stay here. These are This is being though, but what I'm saying is is that When I see you in shit, I go there's only like a feeling of like he deserves it. I love that guy I'm gonna watch this. Oh, I'm so flattered to hear that. I'm It means a lot coming from you. I'm gonna this I'm gonna get real right now. Okay. Oh, you're super I want to sit down. It's just a humongous talent and No, I mean it and I Have the same feeling every time I see you. I'm so happy for you
Starting point is 00:10:22 You know, I remember also I was so happy that you did splitting up together with Emily Kaepnick and I was so happy because there's so many people I admired including yourself and I was just really thrilled for you Thank you and and a more that a lot of my favorite people were gonna be mixing together and that was a great cast. Oh really good Oh, that was so fun. Yeah, yeah, but yeah, that's how I feel about you And I don't you know, maybe I should talk about on therapy, but there I just you know when it comes to you It's like, I don't know why I just don't have that weird thing. Hmm. Why do you think that is? I'm asking her cuz she knows me Cuz he got you Kenneth. Oh, right? Maybe that's it. Maybe that's it. Maybe that's it
Starting point is 00:11:07 But man, you know that we're past this there must be one a yeah Okay, yeah, because that was all that was misguided all along We were fooled, you know, I had that too and we had to give that up because that was some bullshit That was sold to us that there must be one. There was one slot. Well, fuck that. Let's make more slots and And So I know I can't do I'm just not capable of doing it all Yeah, and so it's cool to see the the proliferation of talent out there I'll can I give you one more compliment? Oh, I know you know, I know you don't like them
Starting point is 00:11:43 Okay, but I want to throw this in right I want to say that and this is be Confrontational maybe a controversial right but what I want to say is is that when he booked Harold and Kumar though It was almost impossible to get any part like that. Like it was right. I mean imagine 18 years ago You look at the you know, what do you what do you call it when there's there's new like rules available? You breakdowns breakdowns when you look at the breakdown. There's just nothing. Yeah, right? So it's like you did it before the culture shift. Yeah, I mean, I got it. I just did just I'll go down education lane. Oh, here we go. Back then on the in the breakdowns. They would say Open oh open ethnicity that meant that meant it's okay that you're not white
Starting point is 00:12:33 So if it didn't say that then the implication was you had to be white You had to be one so that the the racism was actually codified in the language and everyone knew it and it was an open I almost said open secret, but it wasn't a secret, you know what I mean? So it was an Asian would be even rarer than open Ethnicity, you know what I mean? So that that was a time that we we came up in it was it was terrible although I was thinking on the way over which is curious how different it was for you because You you're you're a comedian and you had the the hard currency of look at this room I'm telling jokes. They are laughing
Starting point is 00:13:15 So that's you can't you can't talk yourself out of what I'm doing. Oh You can't you can't pretend that that didn't happen Whereas you could do that with in a lot of other ways with acting but with comedy that's That's cash. Yeah That's an interesting thing that you said that you know what and I have low self-esteem, but I do have to admit That's the one thing that I did realize about myself is is that you know if I'm following You know these heavy weights which I've done over the years like Chris rockin and hold my own which I can Like the audience lasts as much at me as any of these other guys. It gave me the confidence
Starting point is 00:13:55 Without that, I would have never made it. I would have never gotten any jobs But that was the one thing that went okay, at least, you know, I know that I'm as funny as everyone else, you know Yeah, but the industry Never met you feel like that Right. Yeah, it never did. It's like I started with Zach Gaffanakis all these guys and all these guys would go to Montreal And I never got to go and I was working at the door, you know I mean I never got the opportunity these guys had so in many ways. It was very difficult, but We made it to this time
Starting point is 00:14:29 You know me and oh shit, man Don't you feel like Moses and you like we're allowed into Canaan? Like I'm gonna be wandering in the wilderness with these bozos Forever yeah, and you thought it wasn't it was never gonna happen the land of milk and honey was never gonna be available to you I know and I can't believe we're here. I won't say that everything's perfect right now But I'm just saying it's like a different time and it's crazy. It's So much fucking better for me, John. Yeah, I mean, I don't want to cry right now Mm-hmm, but there was a time John where I was like, I think I'm out. I
Starting point is 00:15:08 Mean she was with me. I would like wake I would like a year would go by not a single audition And I would look at her and this is after all the shit I've done and I'd just be like It's kind of why we started this podcast really he really had you know, nothing going we were like Do you think it's cuz you don't have any talent? Do you think I was I was I was thinking that but I think what it was is I Made something that had nothing to do with the Hollywood machine. Yeah, right and I gathered The fans on my own. These are legitimate You you you organically made the new model for Hollywood, which is you do something and then people come to you and go Can I have a piece of that? Yeah, and whereas before we were going can I have a piece? Please may I I know I
Starting point is 00:16:03 Know but this is so funny because this is turning into a therapy session for me too because I would have thought Yeah, you know, I was looking at you going this guy has it better than me and the and the reason I thought that was like I always felt in between in terms of my type or whatever I was always caught between comedy and drama and I was like, I can't I don't like I can't seem to aside from Harold and Kumar which I Kind of barely got and was like, I don't know if I did a good job in that Thank you, but like I I look back and I wasn't a great straight man. I was trying to be funny I I should have played it dead straight dead dry
Starting point is 00:16:42 Bone dry, but I was like this is a comedy. I'm supposed to be I didn't know what I was doing Yeah, but anyway, like I I was I always felt like Okay, which way am I supposed to go and I looked at you and I thought this guy's funny Like that that should be a clearer path and I would have thought that you had a better I did I was looking at you gone because I would play while you're Doing what you're doing. I don't know what you're doing. All right. I'm sure you're doing great things But you're doing your great things. I was in Peoria at the chuckle fuck factory
Starting point is 00:17:18 You're main trying to sell 20 tickets. Yeah, I mean, I mean there were some desperate times where I'd be in a town Remember I played this place called bananas. Yes, I remember and then they had a folding seats. Yeah, and then the host goes Call me Jimmy knee Like I'm headlining my name's on the thing is like Jimmy And I walked up and I'm going and there was like 10 people in audience. I'm like and this is in my 40s Yeah, yeah, we were there. I'm in my 40s going. Oh, this is it. This is the last one. Wow But then what ended up happening is we started this and Then things just started selling out and I I'm just so thank you so much. You're welcome
Starting point is 00:17:59 She made me do this. Oh really? Well, we didn't have we didn't have a choice We were staring at each other all day like what we're gonna do like all day like let's just get some mics then And then when I you know, and then you know, we built this thing and now it's all come back. It's really weird But that's awesome, dude. Thank you. I'm so happy for you. Can I tell you another thing that you did? Okay, I will say by the way, I'm not immune to getting my name mispronounced There's a I'm thinking of an actor. I won't say his name. I'd work to them multiple times and I Ran into him at a restaurant. He said Johnny fucking Cha
Starting point is 00:18:39 So confident really so big big slap Okay, yeah, yeah, but why didn't you correct them? They mean you don't know I do it depends on who it is if you're a comic Yeah, an open miker. Yeah, call me by my say my real name, but give me a different last name Go ahead. Give it up for Bobby knee. Oh my god. I'm so sorry. That's how I do it. Shit. Wait a second How do you know I didn't correct him? I didn't say that. Oh, excuse me my friend Did you correct him? No, I didn't Here's another thing that you did last thing but um, I don't know if you remember this but we were doing Harold and Kumar
Starting point is 00:19:25 three Do you remember the the medic? The the guy that did though you remember He was he was gonna be that was I was so pissed. I know I because that was so funny because I Brought it up before you got here. I don't remember this but so you remember so what happened was I asked for like an aspirin Yeah, or something. Yeah to the medic you wanted because I think your trailer was farther away So you wanted to use my restroom for some reason power. So you went in there. He came around the corner This medic and he goes
Starting point is 00:20:03 Mr. Lee Yeah, I be proper or whatever. Yeah, and I'm on a movie set. I Don't you know, I'm so desperate to be there, right? So I don't want to cause any waves So I'm like, oh, hi. I guess I'm Mr. Lee Yeah, he comes out and he goes looks at the fucking medic. It goes don't ever do that again. Damn and I went Because you did something that I have always wanted to do but because I was conditioned to Play along
Starting point is 00:20:42 Right with white people when they do these things that they think they're being so fucking funny And I don't want to be confrontational. So I just let it go and I think that that's the wrong move. I Remember that and I also remember thinking because I'd never asked for anyone to be fired and I and I had a discussion I went back and I think I think I talked to John and Hayden about it and we and I talked about it one now as I'm recalling I think part of Why I didn't press the issue was he was from Europe. Mm-hmm and they got they they got some weird They throw bananas on the soccer field at black players. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's bananas over there
Starting point is 00:21:34 And so I remember going okay, I'm gonna I'm gonna step back in and just let him know that This isn't gonna be tolerated, but yeah, I was kind of surprised myself. I was like I got really pissed Yeah, I was like you what what are you doing? Yeah? It was really like crazy the way he did it like full-on like he did the walk He did a whole like he did the whole walk with this thing. No. Yeah. Yeah, you kind of went around the corner Oh, dude, you didn't tell me that at the time Fire no, but he did the whole thing and like I would have let it go But you you know and from I don't think from then on when people do that. I think I say shit now
Starting point is 00:22:14 Hey, dude, that's 80s. Yeah, like at a comedy club. I'll get off people go. Mr. You so funny. I got dude, bro. What are you doing? Yeah, but before I never said anything I said, that's great white people are crazy. I just had this I read the script recently and There was a Asian joke in it in the scene and I was like, why does this bother me and And the in the in the joke was meant to cast this character the other character as an asshole Okay, huh, and it was directed towards me or my character. They're the one I'm being asked to play and And I just I was reading it today and I was like, oh, I think The script is great, but I was like, I'm gonna ask for that to be removed and my thing is now
Starting point is 00:23:02 If you want him to be an asshole, we can find another way, but let's take all these things out of The cultural consciousness. Let's just remove them. Wow unless we don't need them to be there So I don't need to apologize for the writer, you know cuz I started going well. He needs it because no It doesn't matter that he's well-intentioned. I'm asking I Don't want to be in things that keep this joke in circulation circulation, okay, so let's let's kind of take let's let's retire it and So I think I'm gonna start firehosing everything, you know, yeah, that's so interesting. So it's like I Been afraid to do that where it's like
Starting point is 00:23:47 Why there's a lot you just called me a little dick like a little dick joke like it like in the script Yeah, and I like feel uncomfortable about it, but I won't say anything. So then they'll do the little joke dick joke It'll come out, right and I'll feel it's like when I turn down the Asian accent thing Well, my whole family pressured you to not take it See you were casting yourself as the hero The phone call my sister and Renzo and I were like Bobby you got a year ago I get offered a huge action movie, but I have an Asian accent Right before no reason or no reason you asked him. Why does he need and I talked to the director?
Starting point is 00:24:25 I go, why does he have to have one? He's like, I just want him that one and I go And this is the first time in my life because I've done them. You know, I mean, I've done a lot of them And I don't feel good. I don't feel good when I do them. Even when I'm on set. It's like, you know, I do it and Right and they cut I'll sweat and my eyes will go like kind of crazy Yeah, and go, what the fuck did I just do? You don't have a great Asian accent. It's a bad Asian accent, too You go in and out of it. You're just not I can do a good Asian act. No, you're I don't think so Alright, anyway, okay, I but I remember you telling me you don't do Asian accent So it's like that sucks sunk into my head, too
Starting point is 00:25:14 Well, listen man, but I will say I'm turning around on that in the sense that like if it's for yucks Then I don't want to do it. I mean, it's a different context, right? Like I'd love to do one now Obviously, you know, I was just saying I love people. There are people in my life who I love very much who speak English with an accent Yeah, yeah, like I want to honor that and honor them and I'd love to do it now But at the beginning, you know, that's what I had I had an early incident that really annoyed me and Early on I was like, I'm not gonna do this and then I Was cast on a sitcom as a Chinese delivery boy And the reason I said so I said yes was he had a southern accent
Starting point is 00:25:59 Okay, so I justified it to myself. I was like, okay, cool That's different. Um, I went on set and I did the thing and then so this is must have been late 90s, right and And uh, crew all white men because it was 1997 or whatever it was and I do my Southern accent. Here's your Chinese food, you know, whatever it was funny. It's pretty good. It's funny and everyone cracks up and I go Oh, what are they laughing at? Oh, they're laughing at the fact that I'm supposed to ching chong it
Starting point is 00:26:36 But isn't it funny that he's not ching chong in it and I was like, that's the same It's the same as having the ching chong accent and then I looked at everyone around laughing and They were all white And I said, I'm not doing this again. And so then I became really hardcore about it But that was the moment that happened for me that I tried to justify to myself and got pissed off in myself I think you're right about that I mean, he is right about no, I think they're laughing. It's the same thing You know what I mean? Whereas in my mind
Starting point is 00:27:11 I would probably get off of getting in the laugh, right and not think twice about it But you're right. It is the same thing and that's really interesting to me Because I've done stuff like, you know, um What didn't the league have you play a guy with a disability? But what does that happen to do with it? Oh, because I had being asian is not a Disability This attracts everyone
Starting point is 00:27:38 No, you're right. I had Down syndrome and I had an asian accent. It was it was double whammy Double whammy. Whoa, they double whammy it killed it though. Yeah. Yeah. How do you do? I don't even I even you asked me to do it again. I'll be able to do I wouldn't do Yeah, but anyway, that's so interesting to me. Um, I have I may I may I may I With another story because I did I did have an accent It's a movie audition issue Early on as well and it was for a movie called Big Fat Liar that I was in it starred
Starting point is 00:28:12 um, uh, Frankie Muniz and Amanda Bynes or young stars and it was uh The feature debut of a director named Sean Levy who's a big deal now and he's terrific Uh, but I thought I was going in for a different part I I literally got the wrong sides in my curly fax machine Yeah, yeah, and uh, I went to the audition and they said, oh, no, no, no, you got the wrong side You you're playing this guy and it was a Hong Kong film director with an accent Oh, wow, and it was a comedy obviously. Yeah, and uh
Starting point is 00:28:47 I went into the is then I was like, oh, do I walk out or I don't I don't know what to do here So I was like, let me just Do the audition and I'll deal with it later. You did it with the accent with the accident Then I was like, oh um, but I went home and The next day they offered me the role But then I decided and I told my agents I said, please tell them. Thank you But it's a kids movie
Starting point is 00:29:18 And I don't want kids To inadvertently even inadvertently laugh at a man with an accent and So thank you very much, but I'm gonna have to say no So that message was relayed That wasn't that wasn't easy to turn down something and somehow it's harder to turn down something after they Like you after they like you. Yeah. Yeah, it's easier when you're at home and you say no to your agents Maybe they're thinking why don't you read for it anyway? If you didn't like it. Yeah. Yeah, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah But I was I made sure to tell them please explain why
Starting point is 00:29:54 But they never so they never Changed for you. They never called back go. What can we do to make them? I was nobody, you know, but the I had no credits and uh But he called me the director called me And I we had a conversation and then he said and I told him again I explained what I just said He said, why don't you come in? Let's do something different
Starting point is 00:30:18 tape it And let me pitch it to the producers So I did I came back the next day Took the same lines and did a different take Without an accent He sent it off to the producers and he said you got it Wow So but it does start with like
Starting point is 00:30:39 The first step is the willingness to let it go which I think is the hardest thing to do So especially when you're poor when you're poor. Yeah, it's so hard. I can't imagine like I can turn down things now But dude, I would do light gay porn. I mean back in the day. I mean, I don't like light. Yeah Not on the face, you know, and I'm the hair you're man But you know what I mean and also use the japanese one of one of the blur things out I like their technology when it comes to that. I trust it. You're me just blur everything out But I would have done anything right back then a movie You know me accent a fuck. Yeah, I would have done it, but it's like
Starting point is 00:31:20 Wow, man But now I can say no Because I have a little bit of money That's the lesson is that cool Is that gross for me to even say something that allowed me if it doesn't feel gross It doesn't feel gross to me. No, it feels good to me. It feels free. Yeah, you know, I mean So yeah, I mean you can get to what I always say like I guess to me It's however you get to the place where you feel secure is legitimate. You know what I mean like and
Starting point is 00:31:51 If if having money allows you to be the kind of Artists you want to be then that's then I think you should run straight towards that. You know what I mean? Thank you so much and I'm running right now I'm gonna run straight toward that man Oh Fuck yeah, dude Did you break a little foot during the from cow would be about what happens? I I I I broke my ACL I'm sorry. Yeah, we're saying it like that. Yeah, I didn't know specifically what it was quite a little foot
Starting point is 00:32:23 What's ACL is that big? I got a boo boo on my knee. What happened? Um, I don't know. I I landed it funny I think uh It's it's kind of a freak accident. Um, because I'd done the sequence A bunch of times and then on the last one. Oh my god, uh, not the second the last one The last one it, uh, it just popped Because even that little sequence I saw you in in the first 20 minutes of cow would be pop It stresses me out like I watch you and I'm going he had to jump over that thing
Starting point is 00:32:59 Like all these things that you have to fucking do. Yeah. Yeah, it's uh, it's a lot. It must be fucking exhausting. Yeah um We did a lot of training, you know, I had to I was I was soft man. I had to get in shape and I had to train a lot for it. Um But you know, that's another thing you bring up the accent because I think when I was younger, I was like, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna kung fu it up, you know, uh But that was a mistake because
Starting point is 00:33:34 uh The kung fu the the martial arts is an awesome discipline and it's like a great Addition to my life and I love it so much. Well, you actually know the shit. Well, no, I mean I I'm not an expert in anything but I I whatever whenever I'm learning, um, All the things that I've learned for the show, I just appreciate knowing and um, I guess it's like one of those things I always say like, uh Everyone's we're in this like a time where everyone's trying to do two and three things at once But everyone's favorite thing is a thing that you can't do anything else while doing be a yoga or cooking or
Starting point is 00:34:18 Martial arts or whatever it is and martial arts is one of those things that requires everything Uh, you total presence to do. Oh, wow. Yeah, so I dig it. Wow You're right that it is a discipline. Yeah. Yeah, it seems that's why I never did it Makes sense. That's why I don't have a belt The reason why I don't have any stripes or nothing like that is because I know how complicated your belly Refuses fuck you Matt. Oh, sorry. What? I'm sorry. I thought you were a guest in your home. I thought you were attacking me I thought you were at home. I'm sorry. You're right. I love you. You love my belly. I love you
Starting point is 00:34:58 I love your belly, but john you look really on that color, but john What are you saying that for so top or bottom or both The yellow or the the is that light tan? That's just a top. The tan is trash The bottom is trash. It's garbage. It's garbage. Yeah, it's garbage, but Would you say Would you say though because you haven't seen me in a while? Yeah that I've ballooned a bit Yeah, what was the last thing you asked? Be honest with me. Have I ballooned a bit? I cannot tell that's a lie
Starting point is 00:35:33 No, it's not. You really can't tell that I'm fat. No. Oh, thank you Still because I can tell that you're skinny. Oh Yeah, do you remember this? Oh, I do Different body types. Oh, yeah. It has not changed. Look at him. The same dude. The same dude Is that real? I don't remember. No, yeah, it was Paul Yeah This is a so Paulie your house, right? Yeah. So wait, what house is it? This is above the comedy store. Yeah So Paulie owned a garage. What there is
Starting point is 00:36:09 Can't tell you people still come up to me and talk to me about this this bit bro the time people always say freeze Every time like once a month freeze Hey, look look how fresh-faced you were. I know Yeah, this is weird because this this this sketch is a little bit of a uh, this conversation we were having That was weird, right? It's about that Yeah, right a little bit our conversation freeze la pd la pd and you're telling me to uh
Starting point is 00:36:48 To go for it You're telling me to do the accident all that stuff, right and then you come in you swoop in and get the fucking thing Yeah, without Louie Anderson was in that too, right? Louie Anderson. What a weird fuck. Yeah, that was such that was such a long time ago It was right Oh, and remember I gave you an award Yeah, I asked you to give me the award. I was what award was it? I don't remember. No, tell me what word I was telling them about I don't remember. I remember being in a conference hall. It was a lot of Asians. Yeah, and I was like You want me to give you an award? That's why I was there, right? Yeah, I went up there and I gave you an award
Starting point is 00:37:21 I remember you presented the award to him. I said I I don't remember my speech. You said something about my eyes I recall that. Are you being real? Okay? I'm being real like in a stereotypical way like this guy has the gookiest eyes I've ever seen No, we're in polite My dad was there. Oh, yeah, that's what your dad was there. Yeah. Yeah, your family was there. Yeah, yeah I said something about he has mesmerizing eyes like why would I fucking say that? I don't know, but I said something. Yeah, okay um, that's all I remember, but uh, yes, I I I've always admired you
Starting point is 00:38:00 All right enough of this fucking. Okay. We love each other. We get it man John when you have to prepare for a role, do they give you an image of what the end goal is like? Hey, we need you to get fit This is the end result where we need you to be like 16 pack or whatever weigh this much and be this agile I think the the this in terms of spike. I've never been told that although I was told for star trek in a very, um polite way because I was uh, I was
Starting point is 00:38:31 Heavy for me at the time and pretty damn out of shape and they said We would like him to be athletic looking and that was that was a very nice way of putting it. Um, and uh For cowboy bebop. I think it was always, um Just getting shape and look like a martial artist like not. Um, it wasn't about getting Bigger yeah, but I look at like kumail, right? You see his transformation I love it. Did you just you ate something sour? No, I love it. I mean like a baby. That's me going. I love it. I love it I love it. I just think being he's a comedian, right?
Starting point is 00:39:10 Well, he's a comedic actor. He's a comedic actor when a comedic actor looks like that. It's fucking blasphemy It's fucking blasphemy. What are you looking like that for? I don't like it That's insane. I liked it when he was funny It's funny. Yeah, it's funny, but I'm just saying like did they show him a picture and said you got to be jacked like this No, but he was always he's been like that. No, no he has I saw a photo of I'm getting you're getting really passionate. That's all right Just a lot of I get body passion
Starting point is 00:39:47 I have so much body passion. I don't know that about me. Okay. I'm just saying three or four years ago I saw like sexiest man or something like that. Yeah, he was like 90th on the list Right and I remember seeing it was like this much of a of a photo and it was like that and I was like Fuck it and I fuck you ripped it. I ripped it But he's looks great. Look at what he used to look like normal Yeah, I knew you were a badass, bro. I knew you were a badass Dude, you don't even know how many times I saw the Star Trek movies when you were fucking in the remember you guys Remember
Starting point is 00:40:21 You guys were both shooting down you and Kirk shooting down to think right and they were drilling right the red stuff the matter right and then you You put your parachute, right? And then you landed on it and remember he was slipping Ah, right and you had your sword and then they came out of the little Little compartment you fought him like this can't I want you to do another an entirely new podcast Where you just described movie I I should it will be hit it was it's like audiobooks. Yeah, you know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:40:54 But here's another sound Star Trek when you were um, you were you were told to lead you were you're the captain, right? Remember and then you had to do that one speech. Yeah, I remember that too. He has another thing in the third movie, right? No, I'm gonna tell you but you were so athletic. Oh, it was basically the whole I'm gonna show you more how athletic right and then then third movie. I remember remember you were captured on that In that you know on that planet, right and then that lady had the thing in her head Remember she had the thing that opens up. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You were there, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Yeah, and here's what I also liked about the movie. They made because of um, sulu they they made your character Gay gay. I like that
Starting point is 00:41:39 I love you know what I remember um, I just remember uh, there were there were um, there were discussions about sulu's husband and um, I I said Because because it could have been a different species could have been a cling on or whatever Yeah, yeah, yeah, and I said I was like an asian man uh, and There was a little bit of difficulty because we were shooting that scene in dubai and there were
Starting point is 00:42:07 cultural problems with cast Getting an east asian man And one that would be willing to be depicted as gay. Wow So we ended up using our one of our screenwriters for that role Oh, but um, but I requested an asian man because I was like if we're gonna go Gay and this is just my own trip. I was like I wanted to be super like heteronormative
Starting point is 00:42:35 In the future like this is so there's no like a weirdness about Because I did know like being older. I've known a lot of gay asian dudes who don't want to touch asian dudes Oh, you know, and so I was like I want that in the future. There there's no hang-ups This dude's thinking about the fucking future over here. What's Bro, what if you got a call to be his husband? But I'm What so what when I saw that I've seen a movie thousands of us But when I saw that part every time I see that part I go
Starting point is 00:43:06 imagine I'm mad because Pike what's his name chris pike chris pine chris pine chris for pine captain pike pike captain pike captain pike Oh, yeah, but who is another character Kirk? What's what's his name? Christopher? Chris pine? Major movie star. He's a huge star. I love him. I love him, right? But there was a moment where he gets off the ship. He sees you guys and you guys walk up with your daughter, right? Yeah, yeah, I imagine if just for a split second if it was me And now the audience did the audience
Starting point is 00:43:37 Imagine the audience. He would go fucking crazy The audience frees I'm crazy. It would have ruined the movie It would have ruined the movie, but it would have been it would have been a great piece of cast but dude, I'm telling you right now I Honestly, I love
Starting point is 00:43:57 I'm a big star trek fan bro, and I love those movies. You know, oh, thanks. Yeah. I'm gonna stop fanboying, dude Yeah, so how'd you get into star trek? Um I take Because I wanted to put you down a little bit A little bit just a little bit. You know what I mean? I'll tell you how dude. Uh, yeah, go ahead I'll tell you how dude Can I tell you how dude? All right because I don't think that I
Starting point is 00:44:27 loved living My lot. I love my life, but it's like the society I live in I don't particularly like, you know, I mean, it's free I have the freedom. I love being an American But because of all the stuff that we've talked about right I think as a kid I've always wanted to see a different future You know I mean and star trek always Provided a future for me that I could live with Like for instance multicultural, right? There's no there's no you're talking about the original series, right? No
Starting point is 00:44:58 I'm talking about next generation next generation. Okay. I'm a big next generation. I like the original as well But um the next generation it's all about just growing and helping each other I don't know. I just glommed down to that idea, right? Yeah that we could all just kind of move beyond This Trump shit all the shit that we had to It's backwards. I I that's that's I have the same feeling about star trek and it is like it was born in the 60s And it was this vision Of post-war america like we could be the city on the hill We could be a great nation
Starting point is 00:45:34 You know and we're gonna be diverse and obviously there it's of its era So there's a white man at the helm, but like it was this really inclusive idea of what america could be because it's it's it's set in space, but it's about america and what we What we could be if we really stuck to our ideals or rather lived up to our stated ideals. Yeah, you know It's so also important to see people like sulu and Uhura, you know what I'm saying? Is that right? Uhura? Uhura? Right, it's like a korean word. I just try my best guys
Starting point is 00:46:10 All right, so to see an aging, you know, I think check off is a what's check off mexican. What is he? Check out check off seems mexican. Yeah Is he russian? Yeah, it's just all that stuff What's so funny that you got check the original check off looks mexican like if he Oh, what it doesn't know. I mean if you honestly dude if you went to I don't want to be stereotypical, but keto moss I don't know
Starting point is 00:46:40 Let's just move on. I think I took myself a hole dude. I think I took myself a keep it in, but you know I mean check off is not mexican. Let's move on don't have to look it up. I don't know what you're doing I just want to make sure um But i'm sorry also, I want to say I mean we brought it up. I just sorry for your loss on that movie Maybe spanish. Oh, yeah, that that must have been devastating. Was that devastating? Obviously. I don't want to talk about it. Yeah, it was uh, he uh uh, Anton uh This is just a really special person and um Part of i'm sure part of
Starting point is 00:47:15 What makes it extra He's a really beautiful person and um, he was just young and um, so, um He had a really really obvious. You could tell he's so talented. Oh my god, um You know like I don't consider myself a natural born actor like I go. Oh, I had to learn how to do that and Uh, I'm I'm clever. You know what I mean? Like I figured it out. You're crafty. I'm crafty But uh, but like he's a natural born artist I won't even say actor. He was just like, oh, this this is a seeker. He's um
Starting point is 00:47:52 Uh, well to get that part right though, right? Because they're so iconic these parts, right? He doesn't look like Chekhov, right? Yeah, it's he became him though. Yeah, which is the which convinced me like as soon as he started talking I'm like, yep, that's Chekhov. Yeah, even though he didn't have the look how huge huge fan, you know, um That's a really good cast all around. Oh my god, dude. What it's a fucking I'm sorry. I'm getting goosebumps right now. I did That whole series dude is amazing. Are you're not doing more? I don't know. Um, we might, um They're so good. Yeah, I think so. Is it because I mean it's been hard to move on
Starting point is 00:48:34 I think there's a lot of elements in why it's been hard to do a part of it is just Everyone it is really busy Like that's a big cast and everyone kind of Uh, I don't want to I don't want to sound like I'm too everyone kind of their careers grew Killing it. They're there. So there's that and um You know, I don't know, uh, if we're uh, but I'm also not sure sometimes like are we
Starting point is 00:49:05 competing with Giant franchises like Like billion dollars Franchises like like billion dollar franchises like adventures. You mean? Yeah, and that kind of thing and We're actually more niche than that. You know, really that I think star trek movies are not that they're at its core. They're Rather intellectual, you know what I mean? They're not action movies as such Um, and so I don't think you can expect but but and yet they're expensive
Starting point is 00:49:37 You know like those other movies. So it's it's sort of I don't know. Yeah, that's a shame because I I could literally watch another nine of those movies I mean you watch me. I I'll watch that shit over and over and over again. I'm obsessed with it I really think they're that good. You know, and I love JJ Abrams. I love you. I love What's his name? Christopher pine? Christopher pine chris pine chris pine. Yeah, his dad, right? Yeah, dad was in uh, We're that, you know, who his dad is and you know, I know he's a common chris pine John John, I just want to say something to you bud. Bob pine. Uh in chips. Yes. Yes. He was amazing
Starting point is 00:50:18 Chips chips. Yeah, did you meet him? Yeah. Yeah, you did. Yeah. He's a gentleman. I bet he's like a proper Proper gentleman. Let me ask you something I want a little insight. Okay What's Leonard Nimoy like Like, um He's like a spirit not like a human being like he's he's uh, was um, uh, like a just a beautiful spirit like a almost, um Kind of like a religious figure Maybe that's an angel. Yeah, yeah
Starting point is 00:50:53 Yeah, he's an angel straight from heaven You're a beautiful person When I I didn't know him well, I can just say who does Who knew that guy, right? But I remember there was a scene where they were doing it with chris pine and um, Who's Englishman I like? Benedict Cumberbatch No, no, no the other one the funny one Scotty Simon Pegg Simon Pegg. Yes. Love Simon Pegg. I was in paul. Oh, yeah one line. You got cut. I got cut out of it
Starting point is 00:51:23 One line I played a valet I said got cut out for a big fan. You're terrible with the name I know it's it's a thing that I do Simon Pegg and um chris pine We're doing a scene I guess with Leonard Nimoy and I guess Leonard Nimoy was taking a nap And they were both going While they were sleeping like it must have been So amazing to have someone like that on set man And what it felt like I recall it in the first movie it was like it felt
Starting point is 00:51:58 Like uh We were being blessed, you know by the by him agreeing to be in it and it felt like okay, we're gonna be all right um, and it because everyone was kind of nervous and um We were wondering whether this is the right thing and all the stuff and are we gonna make a good movie and are the fans gonna like and all the stuff and and Leonard Nimoy just walked onto said and He was Very calm and very sweet
Starting point is 00:52:25 And very complimentary and I think everyone exhaled When he showed up And he was giving that to us. I felt like I I'm telling you right now man If I saw Leonard Nimoy I think I would just have no more moisture in my body Because of just the sheer joy of tears coming down my face I love him so much that guy. I believe that. Do you believe that? Yes, I do. Yeah. I'm fucking obsessed with your
Starting point is 00:52:56 Oh my god, what a great guy Moistureless you when you die um I feel like it's been almost 10 years It's been that oh wow Could it be uh 2015 Oh wait a year. Sorry. That's Yeah, 2015. Wow. So John, are you back for a while now or no? Yeah, I'm back. Um, I I
Starting point is 00:53:22 Shot the show in New Zealand. Yeah, and then um, I stayed and did uh a film there and then um And then we were there sort of we waited out the pandemic a little bit put my kids in school and then um in New Zealand You did. Yeah. Wow. Yeah What a great place to be during the pandemic. Yeah, there were COVID lists for most of the time And then at the end there we got put into lockdown because delta got in Um, and then we left, uh, but it was uh, it was a really great respite for us. Um, Did they speak English?
Starting point is 00:54:02 Oh my god, Bobby Yeah, they do. Yeah, what is your problem? Well, they probably have a native of Yes, the Maori. The Maori is a great language, but they they all speak English. I had no idea and I learned something new Oh, yeah, that's right. It is at Asanya speaks English Oh my god, israel at Asanya is also from Nigeria. He's also from Nigeria But he has New Zealand roots as well. Right. Okay. So they speak English. Yeah, but he's not Maori
Starting point is 00:54:30 I'm just letting you know israel All right, my god So you spent the fuck here My god, you spent the pandemic at New Zealand. Yeah. Yes at New Zealand Let me guess the city Name one city in New Zealand Ock. Ock. Yes, close. Yeah. Yeah, that's I know. There's a Ock Uh-huh. Ock with Oshowitz. Ockton. Not Oshowitz. Um, it's not Oshowitz, right? No, it's no. What's Oshowitz?
Starting point is 00:54:58 That's the world Hitler Fuck I got wrong. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's way too far. That's right. That was like that's inappropriate. I'm disappointed I'm so sorry. I should have gone Keep it in but I'm sorry Give me the the another noun or another sound. You should guess it. Disney. Ock. Ock. It goes Ock and there's one more Ock syllable. Can you can you give me a word that sounds like it? Hand. Auckland
Starting point is 00:55:32 Well, wow, you're that was wow That's really good. Are you being real? No I know. I don't know. All right. All right. So you were in Auckland. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah So when you're in Auckland and your kids are going to school there, yeah Obviously they speak English. I know that because you know, I know. Yes, my kids speak England I know, I know. I speak English They speak English God
Starting point is 00:55:59 So they go I'm gonna say this. How old are your kids? What's that? How old are your kids? That's not that's not appropriate. Oh, yeah That's sorry. No, no Are you all young kids? No, they're 13 and eight 13 and eight, right? So they went to school here So I'm sure going to New Zealand is a culture shock. That's all it it was. Yeah, it was it was uh but they they they adjusted pretty fast they're really sweet over there and um I guess Kids are pretty flexible, you know, I was all freaked out because uh, you know, I went Just because of my immigration
Starting point is 00:56:32 You know, because when I was Six, uh, I was born in Korea. So I came to the States when I was six and didn't you were born in Korea? I'm a foreigner, bro. Yeah How good was that? How good was that? Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha Do you kids speak Korean? No, they don't your wife is Asian though. She's Japanese A different country different country. We're learning something new They don't speak English there
Starting point is 00:57:11 They don't Japan Am I what's wrong with today everything I'm saying. No, just stop. Stop. Sorry. Sorry. Everything. I'm saying you astounded astounded that I let you enter me You mean penetrate you sexually yes, I found it you look at me when you I looked at you because In sorrow I also looked at you. Maybe you'd have my back. Maybe but You didn't have my back. No Yeah, I don't even I one day one day. I'll realize why you let me inside. Yeah
Starting point is 00:57:52 The most important thing is I'm inside. Oh my god. Okay. Let's move on. I didn't grow up here either I moved to but Stop with the gang Bobby you'll have to hear this because I grew up in the Philippines But believe it or not. That's an English. We speak English there as well. I know I didn't really understand like oh That's why I'm a little uptight about it and was really worried I'm sure that that factured into it and also like it was it's a It's a dominant white nation and I was like, okay, so are they gonna be okay and You know you so I was worried about it a little bit. They were fine
Starting point is 00:58:32 You know one thing about New Zealand that's also interesting like you mentioned the Māori is Just as an American there they're dealing with their colonial past in an interesting way. They're like trying to From what I observed there were You know trying to come to grips with it come to terms with it, you know, they have Māori schools and It's definitely a bloody history that they are trying to educate their kids about and I I can't speak I'm a foreigner. I
Starting point is 00:59:08 Can't speak to how well it's being done and what the perspective of the Māori is But from what I saw as an American I was like, oh, this is this is really a road map That that we should probably take a look at it will never do that Americans will never do it Why is that? Because we're we were split into two tribes, right? And it's really heated and I just you know, I don't think that it's as heated in New Zealand I think there's far more they're not European
Starting point is 00:59:37 But I just feel like they're just more like, you know, cultured in that way. You're where it's like in America I mean, it's just split in half and it's ugly out there when I performed sometimes over the years last 25 years I would if I saw an Asian guy with a white chick 20 years ago. I would say something like this is so stupid I would say something what they go. You won the lottery. Yes. I know that line and I hate you hate it But I used to go You won the lottery to the Asian guy, which is terrible, but used to get a laugh, right? But I see now in the last five years I don't do that anymore because when I say that it doesn't get a laugh anymore and the and the guys
Starting point is 01:00:13 Let's fuck you. That's why you fuck you. Yeah, that's why I stopped saying it. It didn't get a laugh. Fuck you. Stop Not the fact that I cringed every time. It's cringy. It's cringy. But what I'm saying is is that And now the audience like what the fuck do you mean? Yeah, Bobby. Yeah. All right. Anyway, part of that your girlfriend's Asian. I have to hear you tell another Asian He won the fucking lottery And I'm like what the fuck. All right, I'm an immigrant from the Philippines. Hey John I know, you know, you're a busy guy But I want to you know, I want to get out of here. No, I want to talk about our friendship real quick
Starting point is 01:00:54 All right, I don't want from now on okay This once a year bullshit every other year of a random text from you or me I feel like I'm the one reaching out to you Oh, and I'm gonna now I'm gonna make it an effort to become friends with you All right, I'm gonna make it effort. I don't know how to do it But I've been doing it lately the last year I've been really going out having dinners with people and trying to enjoy that avoidant attachments I'm trying to not be that weirdo, right? So from now on let's this be known as a new age for us
Starting point is 01:01:32 Let this be known as a new age for us. Let it be known and let our friendship evolve from here And let our friendship If I could I be if you're president, I'd be your speech writer and I would yell lines. That'd be great I'm repeating the vow. Oh, yeah, you are. So that's the vow from now on Secondly John, um, I can't fuck also believe that this is the first time you've ever done Yeah, or podcast. It's it seems like a slight. Don't you think on your part? It doesn't I tell you why it doesn't okay? I'll tell you why it doesn't. Yeah, okay. Go ahead. What other Asian actors have you had in here a lot? Okay, there you go
Starting point is 01:02:17 Jimmy O Yang before me really you've asked Ronnie Chang He said no, you didn't say no Yeah, we had a aquafina twice a lot more Koreans a lot. Yeah, I'll tell you the reason why I don't want to be intrusive and I have to be honest. Here's another thing Um, is you know when you don't talk to somebody for that long You don't know what they're going through and their personal lives and that you just want to be intrusive And so from now on I'm gonna make it an effort and I can't believe that you're here I would love to have you back one day if a year from now if you ever want to
Starting point is 01:02:53 John we have a big audience. They'll help you with what with views You gotta do this. This is what it does. I mean, that's like a QAnon thing you're doing. Oh, it is Bro, take that back That's from troll to troll to yeah, yeah, no, no, no like what you know what you want what I want Our views where people are like focusing really hard squinting They're so gross. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they're doing. Yeah. Yeah. That's what they're So if you ever want to promote anything, I'm telling you this is a good way to do it
Starting point is 01:03:35 Okay, so just call me anytime. I believe you. Okay. I'm telling you. I Thank you for the invitation. No, we do at the end. We let him do his promotions right now Yeah, I wrote a book. Um, it's called a troublemaker. It's out next March So cool a city on edge a boy on a mission So the book is uh If you'll allow me, I'll tell you the story of the book which is uh I had this deal to write a children's book a middle grade Novel and I was like, oh, I was trying to decide what it was going to be about and I was thinking maybe a mystery novel and then
Starting point is 01:04:19 and then the pandemic hit and um, we were locked inside and the anti-Asian violence started and I was like, I had the kids and we were just watching the um You know, the george floyd was murdered and there were all these protests on television and we were like We're just having to field a lot of questions with the kids And so then my mind started to wander back to to the la riots And I started thinking about all this stuff and then I had a new idea for a book and I called my editor and I said I got I got a different idea if it's cool. I'd like to write this one
Starting point is 01:04:56 And the story is Uh, a Korean boy. He's a fuck up. He comes home uh from school on April 29th, 1992 and And the city is going nuts and his dad who's who has a liquor store in south central Goes to the store to board it up And the boy decides He needs me
Starting point is 01:05:22 I'm going to he needs protection. I'm going to sneak out of the house And deliver him a gun so Uh, he puts it in his backpack sneaks out of the house and the store the book is about that night as he's trying to get to his dad Wow Uh, so that that's that's the story of the book. It's a great idea That really is a good idea, man. Do I see moisture? No, honestly, dude, you almost got me to cry there, dude. Fuck you
Starting point is 01:05:53 I'm gonna embarrass him in his own house and embarrass me in front of my own. I'm fucking out. Dude, that's a great idea, dude Oh, thanks, man. I could see that as a movie too. Yeah I'm out john. Uh march 22nd 2022 congratulations to everyone listening Go buy troublemaker download it on the fucking what are you called? Um i books i books. Yeah. Is that good? i books or buy hard copy Coffee, yeah, I don't ran out of steam there in the middle of that. I just smoke So it's like, you know
Starting point is 01:06:22 Hard to get everything at the end of our podcast john We do a thing called unhelpful advice and people ask us questions and we answer them. Okay, unhelpful advice with john cho Hi guys. Wow. It's thomas. It's great. That was not like a old school radio John troublemaker I'm a french guy living in paris and i've been in a long distance relationship with my korean slash american girlfriend Who lives in california at the moment? We want to stay together. So we talk about getting married I would like to propose to her in a romantic way kneeling down on one knee, but she told me I don't like romantic shit and she wants something funny like put the ring in a dog poo or something like that
Starting point is 01:07:00 Also, she always asks me things like tommy if I shit on the street, would you stay with me? So I was wondering if this has something to do with her being korean Because I know that bobby doesn't like romantic things and likes the smell of poo Did I do am I missing something because i'm european any advice be quick? I think this is circling back to the europeans So fucking being weird about race. Yeah, is that korean thing? Yeah, also don't put it on me. That's your shit I don't like poo. You do like poo. I do You're right. I do. Yeah. Yeah. I like dog poo specifically. Yeah. What else is so poo and then he was I also don't like um romantic
Starting point is 01:07:37 Koreans are you romantic? No, not really. Yeah, me either. I will say to this dude You're in dangerous territory getting funny Uh, this could miss. This could miss If if you're gonna both are dangerous if she says she doesn't like romantic shit But the way safer move is to go romantic. Yeah, just say it. I go funny Please go ahead. No, you you you hire shinlim A magician. You know shinlin miss. No, I don't shinlim is one, uh
Starting point is 01:08:12 Hgt and he also won the global hgt. He's the greatest Magician in the world. He happens to be asian. He happens to be from boston. Is he funny? No, okay, but no But he does stuff like you know Like he'll push like just a table and smoke will come out So you would do any of those cards out of his mouth like you'll sign it He'll rip it up and it'll come like he does all that kind of stuff So you ask shinlim to do something where maybe If you fake a car accident, oh my god, so scared the shit out of kalayla
Starting point is 01:08:46 Just just why don't you just douse gas my body with gasoline while i'm asleep light me on fire Or no or injected with hyrotechnics. I don't inject you with somebody hire a studio. This is a third category This isn't funny. This is a stunt It's not funny anymore. It's not funny. It's a stunt. All right. It's a stunt. I would do a stunt throw nerve gas in there No, inject you you pass that you open you wake up like mission impossible in a hospital But it's really on a studio. This is a fourth category. This is abduction All right. All right. Well then um, just ask directly john. Yes. Fuck Is that your simple advice?
Starting point is 01:09:26 No, I'm I'm saying go go romantic because it'll uh, I like this stunt idea, but It's gonna be told um And uh, I don't know if I don't know if you want to go funny because a humor is uh of its time 30 years from now. I'm not when they're telling the kids. I'm not sure. Yeah, if the joke plays I also know the difference between Auckland and Auschwitz Great cold By the way, okay. All right, so do that. You have another one. I don't like that. No, that was a good one
Starting point is 01:10:01 That's a really good one. Let's do another one. Hey guys I'm a single 31 year old male struggling with loneliness and depression I wish to get married and have kids but live in an isolated area with very few single women I could move to a more populated area to increase my chances of fulfilling the stream But doing so would require me to give up my dream job All my siblings and close friends are married or engaged which makes me feel like I'm missing out on a major life experience How does he 31 so what should I do? I'm sorry. What can can you go over the beats again of that? Yeah, me too
Starting point is 01:10:32 He's he's 31 years old. He's struggling with loneliness and depression He lives in an area with very few romantic prospects Alaska Maybe Riverside Barstow and he He said an option would be leaving where he lives being uncomfortable and leaving but he would be missing out on his dream job
Starting point is 01:10:57 So does he go leave take the leap look for love somewhere else or Or I say dream job stick with the dream job Stick with the dream job. Yes It's always stick with the dream job. I thought uh, I thought you weren't bound by location anymore because of the phone and the The apps and the stuff he probably does something manual though something physical maybe You know, I would you know what dude? It's like I love you And I love being in a relationship with you
Starting point is 01:11:25 And I'm so happy okay but I am I think I just took myself in a hole But can I try to dig myself out though? You're I didn't even say you were in a hole. All right. Can I try to dig myself out the real quick? Yeah What would you say? Don't go deeper. George. Don't go deeper But I love
Starting point is 01:11:48 Having a companion Right that supports My dreams as well and I can support your dreams as well because I believe that that's very important So I just feel like if he's focused on his job Right and he loves what he does because I didn't meet you until I was 40 Three three years old. Yeah, right 42 42 years old, right? And I just stuck to my guns and I just said I'm gonna do this job and I met her The one thing I did appreciate about him was although it broke my heart
Starting point is 01:12:18 In a million pieces was he's like I want to make things really clear above all else above love and affection Is always going to be my money and career Romantic baby and he was like so manage your expectations. I just I just right now I Don't you have to shop that scene? Yeah, but like it's your great great great grandfather and it's in black and white And he's saying that to his 13 year old Arranged marriage wife He's he's exact same words. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, which is to say. Yeah. Yeah, I mean
Starting point is 01:12:58 You're right I love you. Yikes Hole was deeper. I'm gonna wrap this up with a philosophical say you You want to be if you if you want to fall in love with somebody You have to be happy and fulfilled in yourself first before you can share that with a woman Uh or whatever you're into whoever you're into. Um, so Work on you you gotta you gotta be the most fulfilled version of you first That's what I was trying to say
Starting point is 01:13:30 See, but I said that you didn't eloquently I I didn't know what the words to use but that was just the gist was the same I think what bobby wants to say His mouth be translate translate them in a more poetic way if If you want to find love you gotta be you've got to be somebody to love Oh, I love that. That's good. That's good. That's good. That's good. That's good. That's good. Bring it in Print the t-shirts. Oh for sure John anything else you want to promote?
Starting point is 01:14:06 Uh, no, I have a movie uh the the other movie I shot in New Zealand is called um um don't make me go and uh It's a it's a father daughter road trip movie. Oh man. We it's it takes place in america But we had to shoot it in new zealand because I was there And they they drive on the left side Oh, wow We had to that was it was a road trip picture. Oh my god. How the fuck do you work around that?
Starting point is 01:14:30 We had to shut the freeway down Damn. Oh, wow crazy bill and to change everything. Wow, that would have been oh, yeah Yeah, they oh, here's what they did with the new zealand cars. They put black over the steering wheel And they had a passenger who pretended that they weren't driving Wow And then they put a fake steering wheel. Yeah on the left side. That is so fun. Yeah acting Yeah, so basically they go you want to do this movie? You're like, yeah, but I'm in new zealand and they're they were like We'll come to you. Yeah
Starting point is 01:15:04 If I if that was me. Yeah. Yeah, I'm in new zealand. They're gonna be like, we'll get ken jung Okay You know people ask me all the time why uh, I don't do comedies anymore and And I want to do another comedy. I'm desperate to do another comedy, but I always say I got market corrected I was like, I was the funny asian guy for a minute and then You came along ken jung came along randall park came along and I was like, okay, cool. I'll uh, I'll go over here No, american you're just as funny and even funnier Okay, you're a great actor. You're a great guy. You're you have the skill set. Thank you friend. Don't ever say that again
Starting point is 01:15:48 Okay Give john show round of applause everybody Thank you guys john you killed it Hey prime members you can listen to tiger barely ad free on amazon music download the amazon music app today Or you can listen ad free with wondery plus in apple podcast Before you go tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondery.com slash survey

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