TigerBelly - Ep 351: Neal Brennan, the Grudges Episode
Episode Date: June 8, 2022Despite all our grudged, Neal is a top 20 guest. Bobby lies about the wrong things. Neal is on the short list. Khalyla endorses my sweet apple. Gilbert is a Stardew Brother. We talk 'endrench...ed' behavior, elitist comedy groups, heirloom grudges, The Chappelle Show, and the catastrophe of success. Please support our sponsors.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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It's not a few I realized something. What are we rolling? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
Well, I was gonna say it's good to be here, but we're not this is not how we start by the way
How do you start? I mean we could do pre pre show banter that will keep in you. Would you like to start that way?
So I think we did I think we are okay
Go ahead start my bed and and it'll be like one of those movies where the opening credits are like ten minutes into the movie
Yeah, like when they have freeze-frame. Yeah, I love when they do that. Yeah, so go ahead. Go ahead
I love the decor and I'd like a medium-sized bubble tea
Yeah, yeah
I what I realized Bobby is that you've been telling me
That you're gonna have me on the podcast since before you're gonna we're moving
Now I when I walked up your driver you go how long you've been here you go three years
I'm like this motherfucker's been ducking me for three years. All right. Now what I realized was go ahead as
a grudge holder
I love grudge holders as a grudge holder. Yeah, I'm nothing if not a grudge holder
I know you are you know, I am and even though I have no grudges against you
Uh-huh. I was like Bobby's holding a grudge against me, and I'll never know what it is
It might be because you auditioned for the Jeremy Pivens
Oh
Just met in
2007 right I do have a grudge about that we can talk about that later 15 years ago, okay?
Dr. Ken who got the part is now hosting
Who's under the fucking head? Whose head is that? Whatever the name of the show is? Yeah
What embarrassment is singing?
Yeah
And so if that's I'm not saying you're in a better place than Ken. Yeah, I
But I all I'm saying is like I
Don't think I don't think you first of all if you've ever cast a movie, you know that you're just on the jury
I couldn't I
Understand that but could I just say this? Yeah, we can get this out of the way. All right. I'll just free your movie
You're directing it
It's caught. What was it called the goods with Jeremy Piven? Yeah, don't worry about the good look for it
You can't find it. Yeah, Will Ferrell was producing it. Yeah, well and at that time in my career
I had nothing right. I was desperate right and that read in your audition
No, I know I know I'll tell you
Yeah, so who's in this Jeremy Piven Jeremy Piven who's got alms ad helms being rams being rams Catherine Han
Oh, yeah, Dave Keckner all fucking hell. It's a very funny movie like you will laugh a bunch during that
What a great cast now listen, okay? Yes, you're right because I was so nervous but before the audition
I barely I mean I you know when you have memories that you're like if I didn't use that today
It was gonna expire tomorrow
The idea of your audition is like getting ready to go
It was like packing up leaving my brain. I know I know but I'm gonna tell you because it so I remember I
Worked really hard on it, right? And you know when you're when you have be real
Did you work really hard for this one? I did okay, right because I in my head. I'm like, I know the director
You know, we'd never met though. We hadn't no
We'd never met. Oh, but you know, I know why I felt that right because I worked with your brother. Yes
Right, which is another thing I want to get into later, but the thing fucking cannot wait
so
I remember I know his brother his brother must have said a wonderful things about me
Right
That's how a hollywood works, right? Yes. So I remember going in and I remember during the audition. I'm like, it's not going well
Just in my head. I'm like now in in how
What percent of auditions at some point do you think it's not going well 90 percent?
75% okay, great. Yeah. Yeah, so I should take a personal don't take a personally sometimes
I think it's going well, but it's not
Mm-hmm, and then when it's not going well, sometimes it's good
Anyway, I in my head. I'm and that's not good, but I'm in my head. I'm like just you're doing fine
Keep going, right? But then he's you stopped me during the audition
Okay, right and you walked up to me, right and I'm like, this is a good thing, right, right?
He's gonna say because I had I had done an audition before where they had stopped me and they said you got the park kid
Oh, wow, right. So I thought because the Russo brothers at that Anthony Russo for animal practice
Halfway during the audition. He stopped he called NBC and goes I want this kid
That's what while you were on the while you were taught while you're still well
I was doing the auditions. He was like, I'm time fighting. I want this kid
Yeah, fuck up. It was a magical moment, but with you. I thought the same thing was gonna happen, right?
And now I'm afraid what's gonna happen. Yeah, and you this is you literally was no one understands a word you're saying
Slow it down. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, slow it down and I started over great
But then after you gave me that note, it already
I was out. You're done. I was but I think that that's a good first of all great. No great. No defend yourself. Great. No great. No
I need to go out
Grudge court. Let's take this to
He hold a grudge no
He's closed. I didn't I mean fucking. I don't know if I'm the judge. I made myself a judge. Yeah, and
That's I whispered it because that was you were probably early in the auditions because I would always whisper to actors
Because I'd seen directors yell at actors and I was like this is a bad way to direct
Mel next time.
Yell?
You prefer me to yell?
I like yell.
Oh, really, that's interesting.
But the problem is, if I give you a note, Bobby,
then everyone in the room is watching to see
if you do the note.
Which is why I like to whisper to people
because I don't want to put them on.
You're being mindful about the actor's feeling.
We didn't know, we didn't have a word
for mindful back then, yeah.
I was being mindful, this is the before.
But if you think that the reason why
you haven't done this podcast, right,
because of the audition, that you're absolutely wrong,
you've always been on the shortlist in our book.
You broke eye contact three times.
Can I do it again?
Just that sentence, no.
I'm not, no more whispering.
Your apology stinks.
I'm not gonna walk up into it, I'm telling you right now,
you broke eye, you can't make eye contact.
You're still not, I was thinking on the way over here.
You know you're being racist because my eyes are,
like, the way they are, right?
Ooh.
And sometimes they cross, they're sliddy in many ways,
right, in many ways, they're sliddy, right?
And you think that I'm not looking at you, which I am.
You broke eye contact three times.
Can you see my eyeball?
I don't know how hard it was for you to book me
once you wanted to book me.
Two texts, including COVID.
Wait, you canceled the, did we?
Yeah, because I got COVID, I would've given it to you.
Well, that's, that's your bad eye.
No, no, no, I'm not, I'm not including it.
That's your bad.
I'm not including it, I'm going, what is,
what Bobby's got an issue with me
and I don't know what it is.
There is no issue.
Okay, all right.
How many episodes have you done?
I love this.
350 about?
Bobby, I know, I know.
But here's the deal, dude.
A lot in our thinking, right,
is we can't have a bunch of white dudes on it, right?
And then sometimes like, we'll get Neil
and then I'll forget, right?
There's a lot of dudes that are even, you're very big,
but there are dudes that are even bigger than you
that I haven't booked yet.
Look, I'm going to go around the room, stop talking.
Is there any truth to what he's saying?
You are on the shortlist, yes.
What is the, show me the list.
Show me the list.
Can you show him the list?
I can pull out the list.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
There is a list.
You can read all the names.
Make sure you say Neil Brennan.
I love it.
If his name, bro, I'm telling you right now,
if your name, if this name is not on that list, right,
we're going to have a very big problem, George.
Okay.
I love it.
Write it in there quick.
Yeah, yeah.
I know.
So you've, no, this is, I know.
So here's the thing.
But can I say this?
Yes.
Every time, and when we see each other, right?
Are we not, you know, in a love that's Bobby's either,
but here's what I thought.
I'm going to walk into my thinking.
Bobby's, you know how during COVID we realized
that a lot of people around us were sociopaths.
I was like, I think Bobby might be a sociopath.
I think that might be the problem.
Cause I really think that we connect on an emotional level.
Yeah.
And can I share something really quick?
I just want to defend you, Bobby.
So here we'll blur this out, but here's a list of people.
If you scroll to the very bottom,
we have, we actually have December ideas
and then we have top to sketch.
Top to sketch.
After Argus.
Wow.
Why is that there?
Why is Argus Hamilton on there?
You said put up on the story list.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So Aquafina's on there.
That's a good list, right?
That's good.
I like it.
Even Yun, right?
Christina P.
You have Keanu Reeves here.
Come on.
Yeah.
Keanu Reeves is on there.
The point is, you know,
there's always been some of the,
we've talked about, you just know how the business is.
It's like, you think of it and then it's like, you know,
he's in charge of the booking.
I don't do any of the booking.
I don't call people, right?
Right.
So all I can do,
I'm blaming it on you.
All I can do is give someone a list, right?
Right.
People that I hire and go,
you take care of this, right?
If he doesn't bring it up to me.
Have you guys done a lie detector show
where they hook you up to a lie detector?
Cause here's what I was thinking.
Oh.
No, no.
I was thinking of the way over here.
Your Bobby will lie.
You'll lie about everything,
except the stuff you're supposed to lie about.
Yeah.
That's so true.
That is so true.
That's so true.
You lie constantly, except if I go,
Give me one lie, Neil.
Just all this, what you just,
the last three minutes.
That one.
Again, George whipped up a fucking fake list.
George has a list like when your boss comes
and you can switch windows and make it look like you're working.
He has a thing where you, anyway.
So I'm saying, you won't tell me,
you'll lie about like work stuff,
but then if I go, how much money you got in the bank,
you'll tell me exactly how much money you have in the bank.
Or like, how big is your deck?
And you'd be like, let me draw it for you.
Yeah.
I've been very honest about my deck.
You don't think so?
No, I believe that.
Okay, good.
I always say.
You also have revealed some of my favorite things
that I've ever heard of human being reveal.
Like what?
That you could only,
you had to go to a certain video store.
This is again, how long I've known you
because you had to watch 4K porn.
Yes.
Yes.
Ultra HD.
Unbelievable.
An unbelievable revelation.
And...
I like that in my film.
You know what I mean?
I like Blue Ray, you know,
like, you know, the criterion collection.
I need to get that, right?
So it's like, why can't approach that with my porn?
Wanna hear something fucked up?
What?
Hulu doesn't broadcast in 4K.
You know how we're all getting 4K TVs?
Most of these broadcasters don't even broadcast streaming.
Most streamers.
And so we're all like getting these giant TVs.
What is it about 4K porn that you really love?
Is it just like you see the ingrown hairs?
Like, what is it?
Well, let's talk about what I don't like.
Let's talk about what I don't like.
Let's introduce Neil properly.
Oh, let's start the show and then we'll get into it.
Okay.
Wow, this was one of those things.
It's like an A24 movie.
This is amazing.
This is classy.
Fuck.
Is this European?
Do you guys film this?
This Korean, go ahead.
Good.
5, 8, 4, 3, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2.
4, 3, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2, 1, 2.
RED
Welcome to another podcast Bobby Lee Tiger Belly with the gang. I'm so grateful to be
here. And I'm so happy to be here. I'm just so delighted to have this podcast and our
guest but let's introduce the people around the room shall we? Hello. Again, let me introduce
myself Bobby and we have George, one of our producers, our producer, our main producer.
We have Gilbert. Hello. Yeah, we're becoming closer. Stardew brothers. We're Stardew brothers
now. What's that mean? I play a game called Stardew Valley. Yeah. Right. Kaleila, my
loved one. And so this next guest, he created the Dave Chappelle show on Comedy. Co-created.
Give Dave Chappelle some crap. You know what? That's fair. You're right. You're right. That's
fair. Yeah. Give him a little something. Break him off. So he co-created the Dave Chappelle
show. He was the director of the goods. Very mighty fine film. He also, I honestly believe
that he's like one of the best standup comics in the world because your jokes are jokes that
I wish I wrote. Oh, that's very nice. Yeah. You had a joke about pedophiles and stuff like
that or this and that or something about you fucking adults. I don't know. What was the
joke? The joke? No, it was about Catholic. You went to Catholic? Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
That's simple. Yeah. The Catholic joke. Did you get my life? Really, really funny joke.
Yeah. Can you tell the joke real quick? The joke? Can I stand up? Yeah. Yeah. Stand up.
Can I stand up? No, no, no. Just do the joke. The joke is people always ask me if I went
to Catholic school, did you get molested? I said, I didn't get molested. I fucked a few priests.
Very simple. Yeah. Very simple. I love simple jokes like that. I do too. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
And he did that. He's also obviously a director. He did a play in New York that Gina Gershaw
went to. It wasn't a play. It was a one man show. One man show. Yeah. Yeah. And he's on all around.
And I'm touring the play as you call it now. Oh, you're touring it? Yeah. Yeah. Well, we
put it just an hour and five. We plug things at the end. Oh, okay. Sorry. We plug things at the end.
Sorry, buddy. Yeah. Sorry. How about a mighty round of applause for Mr. Sir Neil Brennan?
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You were also in that Tom Hardy movie. Yeah. You were in the trailer.
Yes, I was in the trailer. I was in Tom Hardy. And you told me that
really didn't have much of a conversation with him. With Tom Hardy? Yeah.
No. I mean, well, he wasn't mean or anything. No, I didn't say makeup. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
But he's like, you know, it's suck when you're on a movie or a TV show and you're
guest starring or you're, you know, you have a smaller part and you're doing it with the lead,
you know, and when they're not as open. I don't like that. I don't like that. It's a weird thing
where they're so, the star is like this special, they're like a Faberge egg. Yeah. And they just
wheel them in. Even when I do commercials, like I did, there you go. I did, there was like a
LeBron commercial, even any of these big commercials. Is that you, Neil? Yeah, on the right. Yeah.
Yeah. The, whenever they say, like, I did the LeBron Sprite campaign a few years ago and like,
he's standing at a table at like a outdoor and a patio and we're just standing like doing blocking
and shit. And then finally, there's like three dudes at the table and I'm like, did you guys all
meet? And then they're like, no, they weren't allowed to say hi. Not like anyone told them,
but like the understanding is, don't talk to whoever the main person is. Yeah. Is that the
main person telling people? No, no, it's just a weird Hollywood thing where everyone knows
not to. Everyone's so afraid. It's like, it's like with the Will Smith clapping thing where,
you know, the, you know, about like the fight, flight or freeze. Yeah. There's a fourth one
that they never mentioned, which is fawn. Fawning over. So they just fawn over and they just,
in LeBron's case, they were frozen. Right. And then you go, Hey, I love you,
it's, there's no, there's no middle ground. So like when I did Pineapple Express, I remember
me and Ken were, you know, we just played like henchmen. I love Ken. Go ahead. I would cast him
in just a minute. Go ahead. Yes.
So Ken and I were like, we had like machine guns and they were like, all right, you got to go 300
feet back. And we go, why we're shooting here? They're like, no, no, but James Franco's coming.
Right. So they had to spread the sea for him to come and they told us, don't lock them
eyes with them. Don't say anything. You know what I mean? We see him come on. Maybe they were afraid
he was going to try to fuck you. That's a valid point. That's a valid point. That is a valid point.
Am I wrong? Have you Googled him? Maybe he was going to enroll you in an acting class or he's
going to take a thing off your dick and suck it. Maybe that's what they were afraid of. I don't know.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So he and then he he's obviously shooting and I remember looking at Ken
and go, wow, that's strange. That is so strange. It's pretty strange, you know. Yeah. Can we get
back to the why you love 4k porn? Okay, 4k porn. Somebody's in a relationship with somebody.
Yeah. Yeah. I like 4k porn because I don't like the opposite, which is blurry porn because
growing up, the only, you know, how, you know, even earlier, the early days when I used to go on the
road, we didn't have like, you know, you know, to get porn, you would have to look at some
weird channel. You also had to go to the fucking store. That's the thing that you. Yeah. Very
hard to express right to people. I would have to get if I was like, I want to masturbate.
Well, I wear my keys. Then I have to get in my car. Yeah. Get in my car and have to drive to
the video store and have to like lurk, get it. Did you ever do the booths? I never did the booth. I
did. I'm a booth guy. I believe it. Yeah. Yeah. Trust me. Yeah. No one's surprised. Yeah. I would
pay, put the quarters in. Wow. Yeah. The floors are sticky. I have a question. Oh my God, babe.
What the fuck? About 4k porn. Because I recently watched this one page. It's called my sweet apple
and it's a porn that I'm into. Are we endorsing porn right now? Go ahead. Not necessarily.
Are they a sponsor of the show? One of the girls on there, she clearly has like a big outpouching,
a hemorrhoid. Outpouching. An outpouching. Is that like the medical term? That's usually for
diverticulosis is outpouching. Were you a nurse or something? At some point. A long time ago. At
some point. Yeah. Yeah. So I was really into it. I was like, wow, she wasn't shy about it. The other
girl was spreading her ass. She had like cherry on, you know, just there. Are you into that? Is
that what you want to see in 4k? When I see outpouch, I turn the fucking thing off. Yeah. Yeah. I don't
like that. That's when you know it's when you hit the outpouch, you've gone too far. Yeah.
The giving direction. Yeah. I mean, I the reason why I like it is because I don't like blurry porn.
And I like, um, I like to see if, you know, if a woman's dirty or like, if the fingernails are
dirty, not the vagina, not looking for outpouch like a maniac. No, but if you look at a girl
and she's like disheveled and dirty and I don't like it. Okay. I mean, I like clean, you know,
when the woman is clean and all that kind of stuff. And I just, I just want to see all that. Yeah.
You know, it was tough with VCR porn. Oh, when you'd rent it, and then it would be queued up to
something. So you know, you could feel the last person coming. You know what I mean? Like,
he forgot to rewind it. Yeah. He didn't rewind it. So now you're like living in his shadow.
Like fuck. I never thought of that. It's, I immediately, I thought it was so fucking awful.
Yeah. Yeah. So, um, but I used to buy all that shit. I used to buy, you know, Ed Powers's.
I remember all those names, but I don't, I never knew the specific people like even Sasha Gray,
like who got like the very popular ones. I'd be like, I'd barely heard of them or at all. Like,
I would, they sound like porn stars for the most part. Like if I, back in the day, 30 years ago,
if I ran into Ed Powers, I would act as if it was like Tyrion Rhee or, you know what I mean?
Yeah. Like it would be like, oh my God, I'm amongst, you know what I mean? A star.
Royalty. Royalty. You know what I mean? That's how entrenched I was in it, you know? But, um.
I don't like the word entrenched. Entrenched. Entrenched. I would have, I know you meant
entrenched and then you put drenched in it. Yeah, but everyone who heard you say it,
saw you getting doused with a fucking gallons of jizz. Yeah, yeah. So I said entrenched.
Is that a word? It is not. Entrenched. It is. Yeah.
It is. See, why, why don't you guys ever correct me? You've never said it so now.
But you don't like being corrected. I know. I like saying the wrong words and saying it wrong,
but it's like, from now on, because I just look like a fool. Hold on, Niels.
I do look like a fucking fool. No, no, no, it's not. What a tyrant. This is where you say what
a tyrant at all. Like you, you're going to let that happen to me again. You know what? I'm not
going to change it. I'm going to keep entrenched. Okay. Entrenched. Yeah. Yeah. Entrenched. You
know what? Why we, why, he doesn't not like it because it's a wrong way to say it. He doesn't
like it because it sounds like you're being cummed on. Oh, I don't want, I don't want that for
you. Oh, you don't want that for me. No, right, right. He doesn't love that for you. Yeah. I want
to be cummed on. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. So entrenched is the word. Have you been cummed on? What? Have you
been cummed on? Ooh, that's an, I've had cum on me, but not on. From yourself or someone else? You
think you'd give better blow jobs than me? No. Because I've only blown like as a kid, like three
times. Yeah. And it was three events. Did you get better? By the third time, I was better.
I was cupping the balls. You know, you know, I was doing all that work, but like sloppy. You're
making eye contact. No, no, I come. See that wasn't at that level yet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Did they come?
No. Oh, okay. So you weren't that good. Play stuff. It was like doctor, let's play doctor,
you know, stick your thermometer in your mouth, the kind of a thing, you know.
Well, your handle is pretty well for the most traumatic thing that's ever happened to anyone.
What? You having to, you getting molested? Well, no, the, the, the, the sucking the dick wasn't
when I was molested. I would voluntarily. Jesus Christ. I was, as a kid, I would voluntarily
like blow a friend at a party or whatever. What kind of party? For the Sadie Hawkins stands.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. For the outpouches.com. Yeah. Um, uh, what, what, how old was the oldest you
were when you blew somebody? God, that's an interesting question. And this is very vague,
the number, probably, you know, the higher it gets, the more embarrassing it is.
Double digits. Yeah. Yeah. It is double digits, I think. I think it's, uh, 13.
Yeah. 13. Because at that time I was drinking, started to drink a lot and I would go to parties
and, you know how it is. You start drinking, you start sucking. I mean, we've all been there.
All right. You said you can't help but suck a dick. But yeah, I did that stuff, but like,
I wasn't ever a professional at it. No. And I didn't like it. I don't like the dick. I don't,
didn't like it. Yeah. Well, I don't know if women like it. We don't like, I don't. Well,
there are some women that swear that they can just be down there for an hour and they're
sopping wet and they just love, and that has never been me. Never. I don't understand it,
but I, you know, I have friends who will get, do that for a whole hour and love it. So I don't
know. Right. Have you ever had another man's come on you? No. Ever. No. Have you seen another
man's come in real life, like live action? Uh, live action. The way they phrased it, live action.
So not CGI. Not CGI. Live action. Practical. No green screen. No, no, no. Real. I'm so sorry.
I'm going to go to the restroom. Just keep going. Okay. I love, I love what's happening.
Why? I don't understand it. Why did you get the pee, babe? I love how sudden it was. Okay.
Oh, she has a poo. She has the poo. Oh, great. I'm, you're not going to be able to concentrate
for the rest. No, I'm not. I'm good. You will. Great. Because I'm on Ritalin. Oh, thank you,
Ritalin. Yeah, I'm on the fucking Ritalin. I don't care. Did you have, did you get back on
Ritalin? Were you off it? I've never done it before. I, um, I've only been doing it for
two months now, and it seems to be really working for me, I think. What's the difference?
The difference is that I, um, can listen to people. Yeah. Yeah. I really can listen to people.
Like I, um, you remember stuff better. I remember stuff better. I'm in tune to everything that
you're saying. Like normally before, when I was like, when Jim Gaffigan was here, I don't,
I don't remember a thing that he said. Yeah. Your eyes were darting. I was darting, you know what
I mean? And it was just like, it was getting too concerning for me. Right. I was entrenched in my own
mind. With com. With com. Now I saw Gaffigan. Yeah. But yeah, it's, I don't know. I mean,
Dr. Drew said he doesn't recommend me on it. Interesting. I told him about it. But he also
said that like syphilis was going to overtake the homeless population of LA. So. Right. Right.
And he was wrong. He was wrong. Yeah. So, um, but I can, and things don't bother me as much. Oh,
okay. You know what I mean? That's interesting. Like I don't, um, usually when I'm sitting around,
I'm thinking about horrifying things. You know what I mean? 15 things at one time.
Horrifying like scenarios for you. Like, uh, like grim scenarios of like the world or personally
bad thing, like rejection, shit like that. It's two things. I'll think about, um, things that
I made mistakes in the past. Yeah. Constantly. Yep. And then what I'll do is if I have a problem
with somebody or something, I'll think about eight solutions of wherever that problem is going to go.
So I'll be able to deal with those things. Right. Right. Like, you know, I have a resentment
toward this, but he could say this. So I need an answer for that. I need to answer. And is it
to solve the problem or is it to block the resolution? Do you know what I mean? Is it
to like stay star steel, stay feeling sorry for yourself or is it to actually resolve it?
Um, I think I feel safe when I think I'm resolving it, but a lot of times it's never resolved.
Right. Yeah. Like I, that's the great thing about being a grudge holder. Is it?
Yeah. Are you really a grudge holder? Yeah. Me too. Yeah. But what is that from?
Uh, I'm one of 10 abuse and, but you were never physically abused? A little. Yeah.
You were? Yeah, I was. And no, everyone got physically abused. There's 10 Brennan's out there.
Biological Brennan's. Biological Brennan's the only kind. Great band. And what,
and what, what age are you in the middle? I'm the youngest. You're the youngest of,
so you're the youngest out of nine, 10 people. Yeah. That's insane. Where's Kevin in the mix?
Toward the top. Oh, so Kevin's, yeah, cause he does look older. He looks older. Yeah, he's older.
Yeah. He, yeah. Can we talk about that or no? I don't see that either. I don't see how either.
Why, why, why, why gain a lot? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Good. But like there's no point
because it'll, I'm not saying. Don't get angry. No, no, no. I'm not getting angry. I'm actually
not getting angry. Yeah. Now I used to be angrier and I realized it's because I've been arguing
with adults since I was five. So I come at every argument on, at a very high velocity,
like, and I got, I'm ready to call people, whatever they got to be called. Yeah. So,
so, oh yeah, but I don't think there's much to gain from talking. It'll just get like,
like, I trolls and shit. You have trolls. Yeah. And I don't want to get into it, but
I do want to say that I did work with your brother. And then you did. Yeah. Let's move on.
Great. He's a really good standoff. I agree. Yeah. Yeah. But what, so when did,
but you didn't start standoff until later? No, until after I'd rejected you for the goods.
That's how I, how I organized my life before or after I rejected you.
Before I gave you a kind note. Yeah.
Kind. Literally kind. Yeah. Good note. Yeah. And I was, I started, I did it once in 1997.
I did it. And then I started again, a little during Chappelle show, like, oh, two, three,
four, but like, you know, had a, was then would work for 10 months and then started in earnest in
2007. What makes me angry about you and guys like you is you got good fast. And I think,
because you're so, you know, you get good fast though. No. I didn't get, well, you know,
it's funny. I got like, I thought I was pretty good and I, but I never got like,
people would like, held the Chappelle show against me. I believe like this weird, like,
you didn't earn this and all this shit. It's like, I'm, I wrote these jokes and now I'm saying them
from my audience and they're doing good. Yeah. And I like, so then I sort of took on people's
estimation of me and then I look back at the jokes and I'm like, that's a fucking good joke
that Catholic jokes 10 years ago. No. Yeah. I love that joke. Yeah. I posted to Instagram the other
day and people are like, where's this from? I'm like, it's from 10 years ago. Wow. Yeah.
So I kind of like, it was a weird thing that, that people had a weird like sort of resentment
toward me. I have a grudge. I love it. And, and, and can I just, I wasn't going to bring this up.
What's great about this is I have no idea what you're going to say.
This is like a Dr. Ken show, the lip sync show, but it's a grudge and I don't know what the grudge
is. Yeah. Yeah. And I, it's, it's, you know what, it's not even a grudge. It's a perception.
Okay. Great. That I'm trying to get over. Okay. Because I believe that it only lives in my mind.
Okay. Okay. So here it is. I love the blocking change. You know,
I feel like you represent, right? A segment of, of show business that makes me feel uncomfortable.
What segment is that? It's kind of this elitist
segment. I believe this is probably in my mind, right? But because I know who you are, I know who,
and you hang out with people that I don't think in my mind or my heart really like me that much,
or I'm not a part of their level of, you know what I mean, of comedy, right? So I, I, and I,
for some reason or another, you know, and I put Judd Apatow maybe in that, in that, you know, in
that he's done our podcast, you know, I would never tell that them, him that, right? But in my mind,
I, I have that feeling. It's, I don't, I'm very comfortable with you, but out of that in my head,
that elitist group, you're the most, I'm, you're the one that I'm the most comfortable with.
The other ones I get really totally agree. Yeah. And let me say this, but do you, but do you feel
like you are part of the elitist group? Fuck no. And I'll tell you why. Why? Because I'm not, because
I don't like, I haven't gotten a movie offer since that Piven movie. So I'm like, I was like the guy
who was like, I was like a feet, I was like a college basketball player, got drafted, and then
was a bust because I did a movie that was funny, that wasn't popular because for a lot of reasons,
but like, so I'm considered a bust. I don't, I'm like, so Jud, Jud, I never get the feeling that
Jud has like, Jud's never asked me to do anything. You know what I mean? Like, that's funny. None
of these people asked me. It's like, I'll tell you why. I didn't feel this way until I was in Montréal.
Right. Right. I don't know why I was, it's just unhealthy. I just feel like you're getting it out.
You're getting it out. I'm getting it. I feel like this is right. What do you think? You'd never
done Montréal, right? I just, so the first time I did it was three years ago, right? And I go in
my head, I'm like, I'll go to the Netflix party, right? And every time I'm at a Netflix event,
I just feel so invisible. You know, I really do. Yeah. And, you know, for some reason in my mind
and my heart, I'll just say it, Rob, I feel like Robbie doesn't like me. Okay. Okay. And, you know,
you guys were like drinking and hugging, you know what I mean? And like a real, you know what I mean,
a bond there, right? And I walked by, you said hi to me. He did not, right? And you said something,
I'll see you around later or whatever. And I walked by and already in my head, because you were with
him, right? Because I already have this, you know, this thing in my head. Conceived. Yeah,
a preconceived, you know, thing, right? I put you in that and then like, I'll look on Instagram and
I'll see you with Mulaney and Ally Wong and all these people and do all these fancy things, right?
And I feel like I've always been outside of the main group of things, you know what I mean? I'm
kind of like cultish almost in a weird way, but it's like, so that's why I feel that way. Am I wrong?
Am I wrong? No, no, no, no. But here's what I'll, here's like, Robbie feels like every, Robbie gets
uncomfortable in those situations because he fucking feels awful deciding who gets booked and who
doesn't. Right, right, right. So like, difficult job. Yeah, it's like, he's like, everyone hates me.
Every comedian used to love me when I booked Montreal and now they all hate me or like 90%
of them hate me. And even the people that are on Netflix are mad that they don't make enough money.
Because once Dave and Chris and Ellen and Seinfeld made 20 million bucks, then everyone else that
doesn't, it's like, well, where's my fucking money? Yeah. So there's like that problem for him.
In terms of like, elitism, Netflix passed on me a lot before I finally got three mics had to be like,
I had to, they saw it twice and passed. Then I did it in New York and I got, it was so like,
well reviewed and like, esteemed that they were finally like, fine, here's bare minimum money.
Right? Okay. So that's Netflix. Okay. Like the Mark Twain thing, the Dave's thing,
the Mark Twain thing, they didn't want me on it. Oh, so like, I'm not the first call,
I'm nobody's first call. Okay. So I have to like fight, I literally was like,
they go, will you write it? I go, I'm not going to write a tribute to, no. It was like,
if you want me to be involved, I'll be on the thing. Yeah. And then, and then I did it and
they were like, you are the best. I'm like, yeah, like, why wouldn't I be, if we're doing a tribute
to, no one knows them better than me. Like, why wouldn't I, and I tried. Do you know what I mean?
So like, the even comedy central used to like, like, no one believe this. The first season of
Chappelle show, the premiere, I wasn't allowed to bring a guest. Todd Barry had a plus one.
I swear to God, I swear to you. I swear to you. I couldn't, I, they wouldn't let them,
they didn't have a, anything in the budget for me to have an assistant because I was like,
like just like Dave's buddy. Right. So everyone, the perception of me of like this,
anything elevated, no one thinks about, anytime I'm in that, in that circle, yeah, I'm for some of
the people that are, I'm as close to the help as you can get. Yeah. Like I'm like the writer who's
somehow scraped in, I'll grape through. Right. Like even people will say like, I'll watch clips and
go, you're a great writer. You know, I said those jokes, like those jokes you love. The same,
you would have rather read them. So there's weird biases against me as like, well, you're a writer
or you like mooched off Dave. Yeah. Dave called me to do the TV show with him because I'm nice.
That's not why. Um, it's like, I'm, I did, we did a good TV show and then I'm a good comedian.
Yeah. Like, but there's all these, I don't know. I mean, again, a lot of it could be in my head,
but I know, I can tell you for a fact, like I'm not the, there's a joke in my new show
about at one of those Netflix parties and rock said something such a fucking burn on me,
literally in front of the whole school. Yeah. Yeah. Look, I'm not going to say it's cause I
wanted it cause it's in the show. It's in the show. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So like, I'm not
like, oh, me and the boys, like, you know, millennia, if I see my, it's in my head. I,
I, I perceive things, right? That are just like, you know, coming from my own trauma and whatever,
my own upbringing. I know, I don't, here's the thing is I don't think you're wrong to perceive
the class element of show business. Yeah. And I don't mean class like money that it becomes about
that, but it becomes about like prestige and artfulness. There are these golden, you know,
these people that are, you know, they get, they have, you know, like Gerard is a great example.
Exactly. Right. Yeah. They get certain privileges that I've, I'm not, I don't have that availability.
I don't have that option. You know what I mean? And I've sort of had to go, I feel like around
the system. And I feel like a lot of my success has a lot to do with, I am a funny guy, but has
a lot to do with just longevity and not quitting, you know, you know. Yes. And, you know, it's like
when you were sort of, before podcasts hit and you were sort of like in the woods. Yeah. Trying
to figure out like auditioning and on the road and whatever. And like Nate Bargazzi and Theo
and the like Southern guys would be like, there was a Southern bias against them. And then it's
like the minute an audience can get a direct shot at you guys, they're fucking right there.
Yeah. So that's over. But I still, I know the, the hangover of this judgment is still very real.
Like, no, I, no, I, I'm a million percent with you. And also you and I might be extra sensitive
to it just by being grudgy, grudgy, grudgy babies. Yeah, we're grudgy babies. Yeah. I'm, I, and also
we enter every room and sort of, and are looking for threats and looking for like, all right,
what's the hierarchy here? And, and. Because in my growing up, right, it was always like that. I
couldn't enter a room as a kid until analyzing if I'm safe. Yeah. Of course. Because I never knew
what my dad, where my dad was going to be. And everything is a risk. It's a risk assessment.
And I've carried that into my life and even into this business. And it's like, I never knew I was
doing that before therapy, right? But now I understand, I do that everywhere. You do what I
do. Like I always mark my exits everywhere in a supermarket or in a conversation. I'll always know
three, three things, like three topics ahead of time to mark my exit out of it. It's just a,
I marked my exit earlier. Like you'll plan, written up what I'm saying, so you're like,
you, you plan like, I'm going to, you hit like three themes. Yeah. So it's like, pardon the
interruption on ESPN where you have like the themes and then it goes away. I'm super, I'm a
fake extrovert. I can function well in like a social setting, but I'm usually dying on the
inside. So I have the three things that I know, like I'm pretty good at talking about. And then
once that third thing is over, I know how to seg my way out of it. Right. And that's, that's a
coping mechanism. Is it, uh, is it like escape? Is it when you are, are there physical exits,
like doors? Physical exits as well. Emotional exits, all exits. I've marked my exits because
I, when did you feel like you emotionally left the relationship with Bobby? I feel quite the opposite.
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All right. Under Argus. Yes. Under Argus. You're on the list, right? I'm looking right.
I heard you were going to have just Argus is suit. That's pretty upset. Right. But the reason also
is that you've been on my mind lately because of my therapist sent a clip of you and Chris
Rock talking about trauma because I didn't know that about Chris Rock's life. You know what I
mean? And the language was something that I was like very familiar with. Right. And I went, you
know, oh, I mean, that's why I like Neil so much because he understands. I think that's what I
always liked about you. I really know that. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Like I'm not, I didn't go to, I never
went to AA, but I went to Allen on and I went to, well, I shouldn't say that, but like I've been to
other 12 step programs and like that's, I was, that was always our connection. It was his fault.
He's the one that didn't fucking, he kept not wanting to book you, man. It's his fault, man.
Anyway, um, I guess we'll take that as truth. That's the guy, man. I don't think it's true.
Look at the way he's blushing. I love it. I'm so sorry, man. I just threw you on the bus. I'm so
sorry. He looks like he ate like, he looks like he's suffocating.
Yo, what the fuck? What the fuck is going on? What is going on? I was just kidding, man. Relax.
Everything's fine. He's sweating right now. Yeah. So have you, I mean, I don't want it to get into
the, the slag. But even the, oh, that, that shit. Well, no, what I was going to say is like,
you, when you go like my big friends and like Chris and Dave. Yeah. I've known Dave since we
were 18. I've known Malayne. When I've known Malayne, Malayne was the assistant at Comedy Central
for this guy, Lou Wallach, who was the executive in charge of Chappelle show. Malayne was his
assistant. When I went into interview to see if I could direct Chappelle show, even though I'd
produce the entire first season at all, I had to like go and prison. It was the fucking, again,
I had to ask if I could direct stuff. And then I directed Rick James, Prince, racial draft,
John, man, like just like, do you mind? Yeah. But just all these weird things where it's like,
Neil, it's the, it's the, a line from candy jack pond or a pool pond to be good for you.
That's how it always feels like that's good for you. That's a fine work. So, so I've known John
since 2003. I've just known these people a long time. And then the people I haven't known kind of
were like, right, could take me or leave me. Right. But you know, it's like Dave and Chris
are fucking billionaire. I mean, not literally, but like, yeah. So I knew them back in the day.
Dave, yeah. Chris is more recent, but yeah. So I get this like,
but I don't, I don't like walk around like, ooh, I'm by myself most of the time. I know,
I see that. I see them once I'm at with them at the store. You never have an entourage.
No, why would I have an entourage? I don't know. That's what I also love about Dave and Chris
is they don't have entourage. Dave does. Dave does now he does, but before he didn't.
Sometimes I would see him at the lavatory just by himself. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Like 90s
and 2000s. I think now because of, um, he needs some protection, obviously, you know what I mean?
Because now we know this now. Right. So, um, yeah, but Chris also was somebody that like would
just be by himself. He just drive up by himself. That's by design. He just doesn't want to,
he's like, I don't want to, it's like not good for you. Yeah. Um, he sent me an article yesterday
that I'll send to you, uh, by, uh, the guy who wrote, uh, Canada hot tin roof. I don't know.
It's from like the forties about fame. And it's like, yep, yep, yep. You'll, you'll, I'll send
it to you. Okay. I would love to read it. It's called, I believe it's called the tragedy of success.
Oh, I want to, I want to read it. Would you have an entourage if you could have? No, I could have one.
I can 100% have one. I think, don't, isn't this an entourage? They just don't really respect you.
Yeah. But they also, they don't come to the club with me. The only time we would go to
anywhere together is if it was a food tiger belly or maybe dinner or something like that. But yeah,
yeah, but I don't have, you still order a lot of entrees. Yes. Is that a thing? You know,
I remember it. Tennessee Williams, the catastrophe of success is the name of the thing.
Williams, the catastrophe of success. Yes. I order a lot of entrees. I like that. Yeah. Spade,
spade does the same thing. Yeah. I like it. Do you do it? I don't. I'm from one of 10 from,
I'm from the depression. How do you feel about him not allowing anyone to take home leftovers?
Is that true? Oh yeah. Oh, is that true now? I like how he won't answer. Now we've, well, no, no,
well, I'll tell you why I climbed up because I climbed up because I've changed that about myself.
Yeah. No, don't do that. I just remember before he would like yell at us if we tried to take like
beef. Why? Or ask for a box. Before. Why? Because if I'm paying for it, here's what I don't,
I've changed that and now I let people do it because I'm going against my behavior. You did
not let Jules and I take home sunungdan. That was different though. I'll tell you why that was
different. Different dish, baby. Different dish. No, it's a big pot. Okay, go ahead. I'm going to
tell you why. Sunungdang is a Korean restaurant on Western, right? And we got, I thought it was a
Korean porn star. I love Sunungdang. Yeah. And we were going to go to the spa afterwards, right?
So if you take Korean food and I just got that car that one that you made fun of,
yeah, you call it Dalia's car? Dalia's car from five years ago. Yeah, from five years ago? Yeah,
Dalia 2019, 2016, Dalia pulled up. Yeah. So we were going to go to the fucking spa and if we're
going to be there for two, three hours, I don't want Korean food just stinking up my brand new car.
Oh, that's fair. That's the dish. Well, you could have brought it into the spa anyhow.
Yeah. Would you want that sitting in your car for three hours? I would put it,
brought it into the sauna. Yeah, I get that. I'm on your side. Don't box it.
But the reason why I didn't because is because, you know, I would, I would, I always, I always paid
for the meal. So I would always pay for somebody like an opener, right? I think I see where you're
going with this. And then you don't want them. No, after the meal, they would just grab it and
take it to go. And I'm like, Hey, dude, you didn't ask. I paid for that. That's my food.
I got to be honest with you, buddy. I know, but I'm changing that above.
Okay. Okay. Because it dawned on me, right? You know, the, the, the, the idea was entrenched
in my mind. And I thought that's weird. And it's a behavior that I don't like about myself. And
so now it's like, aside from that situation, that wasn't an anomaly, right? From now on,
I've had many meals where I've said, go ahead, take it. It's hard. I mean, when I say it's like,
you know, I have to go, just take it. And I have to think about it and let go. Relax. You're
changing. There's like, in the last six months, I've been trying to change so much about myself
that it's like, um, I can't live the way I've been living. Um, and, um, I have to, I want to be free.
Well, the, but it was also, you just weren't expressing most of your feelings, right?
Yeah. I mean, it was, you're like, you, because that's
like, boundaries, right? Like, you know, if a comic does something like, for instance,
the newest one was comics bumping me. Right. And normally,
I heard your case and I liked it. Thank you. Yeah. Normally. Thank you so much. Yeah. Yeah.
Normally, I would, I mean, that's a good, that's a big class distinction. That's another one.
That's a big, I don't, I look at orders. I look at how many spots people have. Like,
let's see where I stand. Yeah. Let's see. What do you think of me? Okay. Cause that's the only
thing. Yeah. Is, is how many spots you got? Like, I believe Emily likes Andrew a little bit more
than me. I would agree with that. You would? Yes. Yeah. Because he gets double dips. Yeah. Right.
So like, I'll call in and he'll get it. No, you're ignoring the fact that you don't, you
like refuse to go on in the main room, but no, no, I've changed that. I go to the main room
all the time. Yeah. And she knows that. Right. I'm grateful for the spots I have. I'm just saying,
but in my head, and that could be just in my head too. That might be just something that
she doesn't think about or whatever. Right. But you're right. I'll think about how many
spots I have during the week, who has the better prime spot, right? And who has bumping power.
Right. And these are the reasons why these are the same issues about elitism and who's better
and who's more popular. Because in high school, it's the same thing. I hated it. You wouldn't
get invited to Sadie's, I wasn't invited to Sadie's Hawkins. That's why you ended up sucking
that guy's dick, right? I need somebody. It was a passed off party. It was like the people who
couldn't get. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And if you suck dick good enough, you got promoted to the Sadie
Hawkins. Yeah. Pretty cool system. But why do you think I have these? You have the same thing,
right? Identical. Yeah. But it's because of the, is it because of trauma, do you think?
Yeah. And I think it's a pettiness. And I mean, not pettiness for its own sake, but like,
like, I want fucking fairness. And, and that's it. If that's it. That's it. One time said,
I've never met someone more obsessed with fairness than you. Like I'm fucking obsessed with it.
Yeah. And, and when it's not, when something's not right, I can't, I can't drop it. Yeah.
I can't drop it. Go ahead. Go ahead. I do think you are obsessed with fairness because you felt
that you were fairly untreated as a child for a very long time. Your parents did what they
did to you, but you throw in an extra level of what your therapist calls destructive entitlement,
which is you want fairness from the world, but you do not want to distribute fairness to others
because you can be seated first in a restaurant. Don't box it up. Don't box the food up. Right.
So you want fairness towards you, but you don't want to give fairness out to others.
This podcast is over, I think. I don't think it can go on.
You know what I mean? Yeah. Like that feeling where you wanted to be seated first because
you're Bobby Lee and if you had back in the day, not now, you're very different now,
but early, early, early. Well, like Bobby, so you have me on 350th on this one.
Yeah. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. So, but, and you're upset that Judd or or
whoever these my fucking are looking down on you, but in some ways you're looking down on me
in this realm. Do you know what I mean? Like you won't give it. You, you expect,
you expect it, you need it, but you won't give it to someone that I genuinely believe like me
for whatever reason wouldn't give it to me. Not like, again, it's this giant fucking gift
to come to the fucking valley, but you know what I mean? Like you don't, you don't empathize with me
and be like, Oh, I should do right by me, whatever. Like there's any, but that's what today's about.
Uh-huh. Right. Bingo. Seven years after you started. It doesn't matter. It happened because
what if it was 12 years? It would have been worse. All right. Yeah. Think about that. Judd told me
he's going to cast you in a movie when you're 87. Congratulations. I can't, I can't wait. I can't
wait to see it. And I'm going to, I'm going to get nominated for something. I can't wait to see it.
Yeah. You're right. You're right. So what I want to be more mindful about that, but can I just say
this? Yeah. It's still about unfairness. Me at like, you're talking about restaurants, right?
Because I feel like, because I, you know, my parents, my mom lives in Arizona and sometimes
I'll, you know, wait in line at like a pretzel place, like Auntie Ones. And then they'll serve
the white dude that looks better than I am. Right. First. Not possible. Go ahead. Thank you. Right.
And then there was all these things that happened in my life where I just felt invisible and not
seen. Right. And so, you know, now that I, this sounds so gross. I don't know why. No, it doesn't.
It sounds actually like. Yeah. Now that I feel like I've feel like I've worked so hard and I've
gone through so much fire. Right. And I've created a name for myself and I have fans and all these
things that for once, please, can I have what I want? It's the Smith song. It's that song crying
about. It's louder. It's on Louder Than Bonds. The song is called Please God. Yeah. Let me get
what I want. Let me get what I want. Yeah. Yeah. I love that song. Right. It's in a movie. It's in
like a camera. Pretty in pink. Yep. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty in pink. So I used to, in my early
twenties, listen to that song and literally cry and just be in a ball in my bed, right? Go and
please God get me. Because I never got anything. I never got the girl. Right. I never got the job.
I never got anything. Right. And so I spent all these fucking years going,
I'm going to make it happen. You never got the childhood. Yeah. I never had the childhood.
You never had a safety. Yeah. So I'm going to make it happen. And one day I'm going to be seen and
respected. And so you're going to get the pretzel. I'm going to get the pretzel. Go. Right.
I'm going to get the movie. Yep. Not mine. Yeah. I'm going to get you. You know what, dude?
You're going to have to direct a movie and you're going to fucking cast me in it. I don't think
I'm ever going to direct you. I think you are. I don't think I am. Because I don't like spending
time with these people. I don't ever want to go to a meet. I don't care. I don't think I'm not.
No, I don't think I'm going to do that. I just will not. I don't think I'm going to do it.
Like I don't. I think I don't have to. And I'm and I'm like, no. Right. No. But wouldn't you do a
movie? I mean, you're talking about doing it with big stars, right? I don't think if you did a lower
budget movie, right, that's from your heart and you did mid-level people, I think you would have a
guitar. I don't maybe. But again, Steve Song. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I maybe but I but even
that it's the thing of, you know, when you don't know when you're like, what's it going to be like
to be on a TV show or a and then you do it. You like go through the entire cycle. It comes on.
It's popular. It gets less popular. It gets canceled. And then you're like, and then you're
unemployed. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And you're like, I want to do that again. The things that I've done,
I like know what they are. So I'm not curious as to like, could I do that? You're right. I'm not
when people go, why don't you do another TV show? Because it's fucking too hard. Yeah. It's not that
fun. It was fun. Like it was fun. Like the thing that I like is the connection. So I can do sketches.
Yeah. I could fucking, you know what I mean? Like I could make sketches. But for what? Yeah. I was
doing them because I love the guy. You know what I mean? Like I was doing it because I like,
so when I do a movie with a bunch of strangers, I'm like, what the fuck am I doing this for?
Right. Like I'm applying this talent to virtual strangers and it doesn't mean that much to me.
It just becomes like a weird stunt. Yeah. Where I'd rather just do stand up for myself,
like I'm expressing what I want or I'd like to work with a friend who like has some that they
would like to express and I really like or love them. So I will do that. Yeah. Because that to me is
like the way you're supposed to use the talent and not in just like, what are we doing? Next one's
bigger budget. You got to see this helicopter. Yeah. For what? Would you do a show with Theo and I?
No. Why would I help? Am I on it? Am I on it? No, no, no. Not like you can be me,
you and Theo or on the poster. Okay. Here's the deal. Listen to what I'm saying. You're on the
poster, right? You're third lead. Okay. But you have to be the showrunner. No. Why do I have to
do the dishes? Because you're a great one. Because I'll fucking tell you why. Okay. Can I tell you
why? Yeah, go. Right? Because even today we were we were pitching somebody to somebody, right?
And Kalyla and I, right? And we were like, we got it. We need a writer. We need somebody that can
do this, right? Right. And when you when it comes to like comics that can package a show,
right? Being trusted with character development and story, right? That pool becomes super small.
Comics? They're like none. None. But you're, I don't, but I don't even know if I'm one of them.
I can do a sketch show. You could figure it out, I think. I could, but I don't,
I like both of you guys. Why would I spend 15 hours a day? Right. Trying and then I have to go
and then you guys are fucking doing coke, getting your, sucking each other's dicks because that's
how you are. How to say getting your dick sucked, but you like to keep it in house.
And, and then I have to fucking come from the writer's room and like stand. It's like, no,
if you want me on your show, write me and I'll make my part good and I'll, and I'll pitch you guys
shit, but make me the, it's again, why do I have to do the, that's what everybody, this is what
I'm talking about. Like that's not vaunted. That's vaunted. That's like, I'm going to pedestal as
a writer. I haven't written shit in like 15 years. Oh, I see. Okay. So it's like, but everyone was
like, well, you'll come. No, why don't you do that? It's fucking insulting. You're gonna be on the,
you're going to be on the racing team, but you're going to have to wash all the cars after, after
the race. Right. Right. Like, no, you got to fix the engine. No, I'm just, I'm a car. All right.
So here's the car, Bobby. Yeah. Here's the deal, dude. And I promise you this and I'm, I'm gonna
try to get emotional. I want to attempt it, right, to be real and authentic. Yeah.
I promise you that I will change my perception towards you because I really do believe that you
are a genuine standup comic like everyone else. Right. And this thought that you're, you know,
I mean, in a different category, I'm talking not in terms of even just a writer, but in terms of,
like, elitism, the thing that we talked about, right? I'm going to change, I've changed my
perception towards you. Right. And, you know, you're just one of the bros. Great. Okay. I'll
meet you at the 101. Right. Let's order a lot of entrees. Closed. No, no, there's a hell of a way
to find out. Yeah. It died. It died. Swingers. Swingers. Late night. Swingers. I actually move
in near there. You are? Yeah. In fact, from now on, I'm going to, when I see you at the club,
every time I see him, I'm going to go, do you want to get some of the eat afterwards? I love it.
Because I've never asked you. You kind of asked me the other night. I did ask you kind of. And
then you kind of went, what'd you say? I told you to suck my dick. You're right.
Okay. No, I'm, you know, you know how I am about my body. Yeah. I just don't, I don't like going
out to eat that late. Okay. I know it's at the end, but I don't want to, I have a couple more
questions. This is the end of the podcast, right? No, we do a thing called Unhelpful Advice at the
end. We only do an hour. Oh, okay. They're all only an hour, right? I did Rogan last week, so
I, that's an hour's unheard of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, um, what, what about relationship? You're not
in one? I'm not in one right now. I, uh, How old are you right now, Neil? Is that, you know,
I want to know. It's one of those things. There was a, when Callan and Delia would do that thing
where Delia would heckle Callan. At one point, Delia goes, how old are you, Brian? He goes,
I mean, how could I even know that? But that's what I think whenever someone says how old I am.
48. Okay. Um, I, I'm not in a relationship right now. I, I basically, I've been, I did like a
bunch of ayahuasca and like DMT and I, you can watch Rogan for that. Um, I'm not going to, look,
I'm not going to, I'm not going to do that again. Uh, look, I'm not going to do the same fucking
monologue twice. Go click on the other link. Um, but, uh, but, um, so I fell in love with somebody
like in February, I've been like pretty close to, I've almost fallen in love a couple of times.
And then I straight up fell in love with somebody in February. You did. Yeah. And you're seeing
that person or no, that's a longer story. Okay. But, uh, it, we made it to April. So, um, the month.
Um, but, but it wasn't, I was great. I was great in the relationship and she's the one that drifted
away. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. She ended it. So, uh, I, but I stand by all my actions and I was like,
I was considerate. I was, when we argued or didn't argue, I like never yelled, which was a first.
And I was also trying to resolve, uh, conversations instead of winning. So I'm about as good at
relationships as I've ever been. Now, the hard part is finding the right person. Cause I, and
also I don't believe that I need someone. Like I don't, I'm not going through life feeling like,
uh, empty. I'm not like half full. Like I'm, I'm not incomplete. Like if I meet somebody,
if somebody can add to my life, come on it. Right. But, uh, most people don't approach it like that.
It, they approach it like I'm, I'm the women, I date women. So it's like, um,
So do I? Well, um, now, now you do. So, uh, like it's, it's, they approach it with like,
you have to pursue me and I'm great and I'm the high status one and you, and I'm doing this.
I'm like the alter at which, and we have to, and I'm, because it's all in service of making a baby
and I'm just not doing any of that shit. Like I'm not gonna hit. So like, so it's more just like,
Hey, what are you like? Do I want you around all the time? Do you want me all around all the time?
Otherwise, like what's the, not what's the point? You know, then it can be sort of a
different kind of relationship, but, but, uh, I, I, I'm pretty clear about it, about what I want
and not, and I'm, and I'm also honest about it. Um, so, so that's good.
We're so similar in many ways. No, not in that way. No, but no, but that was that thing that
thud you just heard was Michaela punching. I know. I know. I fucked up twice. I fucked up.
No, but no, I meant in just in general, you know what I mean? Just some of your thoughts
and stuff. I just kind of went, I do think you guys are maybe very similar, but not when it comes to
what he just said. No, but I think that you're all, you're almost there. You're very close to
being actualized in saying I am a complete whole person and I don't need to keep filling these
holes with. Well, that's what I used relationships for, right? As a, you know, as a trophy, like
what my parents viewed me as a trophy or Korean parents view their kids as like,
you got to get straight A's or go to an Ivy League school or you're nothing. Right. And I think I've
viewed women that way, like, look at what I have. I have a white chick. Right. That was back in 30
years ago. That was the big deal for Asians. Look guys, I got one, a brand new one.
I mean, look, let's be honest, it's still kind of is. There is a little victory.
You got to be, like I always say, you got to be a sexy fucking Asian dude to get a white girl.
Yeah. Or you got to be fast and furious. Go ahead. Yeah. Yeah. Or have some sort of
magical talent. Are you, are we, is Kalela white? So he half one. I have one.
He half one. Yeah. Yeah. No, no victory. No true victories. Yeah. But this is the, I know,
you're never going to get that. You're not going to get what you want. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
But, you know, I, um, this is the longest relationship I've ever had. They usually last
two years. This is a decade. How did you view sex when you were younger? That's always what I
wanted to ask you. Like, um, because you've had a lot of sexual trauma, you were a guy who
felt for so long that he couldn't get the girl. When I was 18, 19, 20,
what did you give you sex for? Like, what was the purpose of sex? Of love.
Really? That's not how I, I. Really? Yeah. Mine was entirely ego. And ego.
Uh, ego. Love and ego. Love and ego. Sorry. Yeah. Sorry to ask a follow up. Yeah. Uh,
the truth. Ego in what way though? Ego in as a guy, that's about the, that's the currency
is like how many, like how hot is the girl and how many of them are there? You know what I mean?
Like it's, that's how you gauge your status. Yeah. So I'll tell you a story. When I was,
so you know that girl that, so when I was 23 years old, I did stand up and this beautiful
white girl goes, you know, I want to fuck you, right? And I did, right? And I had, I had to
work at the Panic in the next day, which is a coffee shop in Laulia. And I remember in the
morning I was there and I just couldn't wait to tell somebody, right? So some, some guy was like,
I remember some guy was like. You got there before the 15 minutes before it opened. Yeah.
Yeah. And I was, I had to, I had to open the place and you had to be at five in the morning,
right? And there was a couple of guys there and some Hispanic dudes, you know, me working
in the kitchen and stuff. I'm not being racist. You know what I mean? But, um, and I remember
some guy going like, God, that pastry doesn't come. I know the windows. I got to leave last night.
And I didn't have to pay for it. Yeah. It was unbelievable. Yeah. Right. And they're like,
relax, dude. You know what I mean? Calm down. But I just remember like it being. Well, people do
that now with work. Like if we go to the store, if we go and you'll go like, so how's your,
how's your hand or whatever? Like you'll just be making small talk. Yeah. It's, it's my hands.
Okay. It hasn't affected shooting at all. You're like, what do you mean? What do you mean? Oh,
I didn't tell you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So gross. So gross. But they, I've seen that. I mean,
it's every most interactions in it. It made me move out of West Hollywood.
Because I couldn't deal with that fucking energy around me. It was like, I got to get away from
it. Yeah. It happens when people didn't work. Yeah. When people had struggled for so long,
and they finally get that job. That's the same thing happens with all. I mean, I, but I know,
but after, after a while, it's like, you know, at first when I headlined the improvs, I would
tell people, yeah, I just headlight sold out the improv back in the day. Right. But now when you
do it, you don't talk about it because it's just something that, right? But it's when somebody,
like when I'm not going to say his name because he told me never to mention his name, right?
So I was on mad TV for six years, right? It's cool that you're still promoting it with the shirt.
It's cool. It's fucking cool. I love the show and it's family to me and I'm proud of it.
That's not the show. That's the magazine. I understand. I understand. But they were in
association with each other. Yeah. Okay. So I remember I had been on mad TV for six years.
I was sitting in the fucking comedy store patio and some dude that just did one episode
on a sketch show as like a reoccurring. Right. I'm not going to say the guy's name
sat next to me and he says, yeah, like all these other kind of they don't get what TV
lives about. Yeah. And you're like, what do you mean? And he's like, I know, just us TV guys,
we have to do two things. I have to wake up early to rehearsals and I'm like, bitch,
you have three lines in some fucking shit. What the fuck are you talking? You know what I mean?
Yeah. And I distinctly remember how that fucking bothered. Yeah. Yeah. And I'll always remember
that. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's so gross. It's gross. Yes. And people, but it's all these
kind of starving people, people that are starving to like feel okay about themselves. And they're
and it is a status hierarchy. So they want to go like, I'm the same status as you. And it's like,
I wasn't judging you on that. Like, but they all everyone's fucking drowning. And it's sad. I don't
even judge the people as much. I just judge like it's such a fucked up system where everyone feels
desperate all the time. It's a sad business. Yeah. I just realized that just kind of society
where even Instagram and it's just all the fucking and it it fucks you up looking at how
many followers people have. And then you compare you compare yourself. It's like, we don't even go
on social media. We probably all of us don't go on social media for enjoyment. You go on social
media for opposition research. Yeah. And cutting. I call it cutting. Yeah. You're absolutely right.
It's cutting. Yeah. Let me ask you, do you do this then? Do you have you done this? Because I've done
this. I don't even know what it is. I don't think you have, right? Okay. So back in the day when
verified was a thing and I wasn't verified, right? I remember going to every comic I knew's
Instagram to see if they're verified. And I remember going to Nick Yusef used to open for me,
right? And he got verified before me, right? And I remember I'm furious about that. Thank you.
Fair enough. And then still today, sometimes every once in a while, I'll do that with followers.
I wonder how much so and so has as a follower and then compare it to my followers. Do you do that?
Of course. Okay. Yeah. Well, I don't, I'm thankful that I was going to DMT have like wiped some of
that shit from me. Like not, it's not wisdom. It's not like, well, I met it. It just happened.
So I, some of that's gone, but it's not by force of like my righteousness. It's just,
it just went, went away. And so I'm like, I do it less and it means less, but, but yeah, that
even the thing of like popularity or fame or anything, it's just impossible. It's impossible
to win. Yeah. It's just impossible to win. You literally cannot win. The guy at the top, who's
at the top Tom Cruise? Yeah. And he was fucking so scared of how well that the movie Top Gun was
going to do until Friday and he realized it was going to be okay. And he's like, no, I got to do
it again. Like there's no, there's no exit. God. There's no exit other than DMT. No, other than
like just some, like some grace that comes upon you or a conscious decision to get out of it.
Yeah. I think I'm at that point. The conscious decision. Yeah. I mean, but then what?
But cause then it's, I was talking to somebody where they were like, I just want to move
somewhere normal. I'm like, you're a piece of shit. I want to be with regular, no, you don't.
Yeah. Yeah. Moved away from regular people because they were too fucking corny for you.
Yeah. So where are you going to go where they're, you're going to go on a farm and you're going
to fucking log into variety. Yeah. Every seven out, like, you know what I mean? Like there,
there is, you have to accept that there is a party that's like in it, but if you can
over, if you can mitigate it a little bit. Yeah. When I, when I was shooting reservation
dogs, I was in Tulsa. I used to go to this place called Cherry kitchen cafe or something by the
hotel. Cherry street. Cherry street cafe. Great cafe. I love the staff. And I remember like,
you know, starting conversations with the waitresses and that and, and, and, and, and going,
I'm a regular guy, man. Yeah. I mean, I think I'm becoming a regular guy. This is great. Right.
And I remember like driving through a neighborhood to get to a set or whatever. Right. And I was
looking at the houses and just literally imagining me living in that house, waking up what I would
do. And I read and then the methods of suicide. Right. And just the glumlessness of it. Right.
And going, there's just no way. There's no way I can have that life. There's a thing.
Somebody pointed out when people ask, what do you do for a living? They're not,
they don't want to know what you do for a living. They're basically saying, Hey,
how should I treat you? Because they never asked that in Europe. They never. You're right. Ever,
ever. They do not ask here when, after your name, who are you? What do you do for a living?
What's your name? How should I treat you? Yeah. It's so intrusive. I find that to be so
fucking rude when that's the, when it comes in the first three things you're asking me. I moved
to Venice 12 years ago because I had to get away from it. And I'm moving back to West Hollywood
because I'm like, I have, I've like made my peace with it. Like I, I'm not,
your Venice spot was dope. Yeah. No, it was great. That loft. Yeah. Oh, it was dope or off. Yeah.
It's going to be available for rent soon, Bobby. So that's actually why I came in the podcast.
Guys, go to truly.com. Oh, so you're living there now? I'm, I'm moving like in the next
couple of days. Oh, wow. So, so, but I'm moving cause now I can drive, I can be on Melrose and
I can be on and not think and be on Fairfax and not think about like, what's my status?
How am I? Where do I fit in? And you just, we're also getting fucking kind of tragically old.
And we're like, how sad is it when people call you a legend, by the way?
I know people do that now. Some people do that. Yeah. Yeah. I hate it. I hate it.
Like I'm 50. I look good. I'm a fucking new face, bro. Yeah.
I'm a diamond in the rough, man. Yeah. I'm 30 under 30. Yeah. Yeah. Like they're, so,
so yeah, I wish it for everyone. It's that, it's, you see like Jim Carrey was like, I hope
everyone gets, you know, their dreams come true, something and see it's bullshit. And I know a
lot of people that have gone through that thing, but it's like, what are you getting at? Why,
why are you doing all this shit other than the initial desperation of like an 18 year old?
Now, why are you doing it? Like what do you, is it money? Like, okay, then once you have
a certain amount of money, now what? Yeah. Jim Carrey is somebody that I've run into a couple
of times and he's a nice guy. I love him so much, but there's something that's changed about him.
Right. It's like he's something clicked in him where he's just like, not out of the business
or whatever, but no, over it almost, right? I, he said he retired. Retired. Yeah. Yeah. Like
when we met him at the party, it was just super sweet and wait, party that I wasn't invited.
Yeah. We were at Keegan Keese's birthday party. Great. You were invited.
Was it? Some of some of us of other elitist things. You're not part of. Fuck. Yeah. Anyway,
unhelpful advice. Just so you know, Bobby and I were in a corner eating caviar,
right? Like terrified to not talking about it. I don't like, again, these are not,
it's, it's, it's just anxiety. Yeah. Just anxiety around,
it's Woody Allen did a joke. Like now I just get rejected by a higher class of women.
Right. It's like fucking, he was talking about a step dog.
Oh, I also spent the whole time at that party because Ron Howard was there.
Ron Howard was there. And the whole time I was thinking, how do I bring up? How do I talk?
Right? It's like, oh, Apollo 13 was good. Or I didn't even know what the entrance point,
entrance point of the conversation would be. Castaway did, you did that, right?
He didn't. He didn't? No. Zemeckis did that. Good thing you didn't say that.
Good thing you did. That's what I'm saying. That's why I never even talked to him because I would have
written just the wrong thing. Yeah. But every time he would cross us, you'd be like, there he is.
I know. I know. It was so gross. I go, there he is. There he is. Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. Anyway. So at the end, what we do is people email us questions. By the way,
we're going to have you back on. You're great. For 351.
Yeah. You're great. Number two. I feel you sound a little surprised. I'm going to be honest.
You sound like I learned something. There was a lot of insight and things that I had a lot
of moments during this conversation and I, and normally I don't get that, you know, rarely do we
get that. So that's number one. Well, when you, you know, guys like me and Argus,
I'm the short list. I love that. You know what? We're going to have Argus on a couple of more
times before you. And now at this point, it's like, knock yourself out. Are you happy?
Did you deserve it? Was this fun? Wait, I have one more question for you. Since you've been a
lifelong grudge holder after you did DMT in Iowa, do you feel like you're still that same grudgy
baby? Probably reduced 65 to 70%. There are a few that I've held on to, like just heirlooms.
Got to. I love heirloom. Priceless heirloom. But I, the comparison shits way better, just like that,
the, the sick mind, the monkey mind thing or whatever, like no offense.
Yeah. None taken. None taken. Yeah, like there's no, it's better. It's better. And again, I don't,
I don't even want to take credit for it because I, it just happened to me. It's not a thing that,
like, I, you know, I went to the desert and it's, I meditated and I really got, I did the work,
like I did do the work before that, but, but like it, it just, it, my brain changed.
Yeah. I read this one thing, it's such a fucking corny, yogic thing, but it's like,
you know how you said, you weren't looking for it, it happened to you. Yeah. And I think people
constantly in search of are reinforcing their lacking. Yeah. Well, no, I, I, yes, I was,
it's the thing where you were, why you were fake, uh, saying that how grateful you are. You were fake,
fake gratitude is because you, I know I could never fake gratitude. Like I can't, I always,
I have a joke that I've never done, which is like, my life is so fucking cool. If I could
experience it for just one minute, I would really love it. Like from the outside in, it's fucking like,
like, you know, it's going good. Yeah. Sometimes you ever go like, how much better could this be
going? Like where you'd be like, I don't have this and I was like, well, how many people are doing,
who would you, if there was like an existential wheel, like there are eight billion different
people to be, would you risk losing who you are? I, you know, no, no, no, never, no, no.
That's what I'm saying. Like, is it, ask me on a bad day and that's the, and you'd take,
you'd risk anyone, I mean, a billion people don't have clean water. Right. If not more, like,
like the worst person on the, on the thing would be somebody that was born blind, deaf,
in Darfur, in a world with HIV, right? So that's the bottom, right? And, um, the top would be
Elon Musk. Yeah, DeCaprio. DeCaprio. A little bit of a different perspective. I wouldn't fucking
trade place with him. I don't think I would either. There's no way. I don't know. I, I see it as,
you know, it's just from the lens you're looking at, because I grew up in a third world country.
And dare I say, there are infinitely more happier. Well, that's the, yes, there are the blind.
No, here's, here's, here's the, here's the question, right? Are you, are we, um, doing this existential
wheel, right? With the mind and the things that we know now, or is it, do we get a blank slate?
No, uh, you, I mean, maybe you could be 10 years younger as that other person, but no, but you
have, I already live this life. You have their comparative. No, you get their consciousness.
I do not want to be younger. That's for sure. But yes, but you, you, uh, you have, you get their
consciousness. So you don't really remember. It's like, my point is you wouldn't trade this for,
I don't think I would. Yeah. As much as I complain and shit. Would you? No. And it's only gotten,
and I'm a guy who doesn't, I don't appreciate my, like, I don't have credit. It's like, I,
it's when people go appreciate your health. Fucking how you only appreciate it in its
absence when you, when you get sick. Right. I swear. If I never, I'll never, uh, take it for
granted again, and then you're healthy for three days and you're like, fucking sickness.
What are you talking about? Yeah, yeah. Interesting. So you wouldn't, I'm telling you now, um,
ask me on a bad day is, can you ask me on a bad day? I will. When I'm really like, I will,
when you have to extract, which is going to be tomorrow. Anyway, um, I have a lot of bad days.
I'm kidding. Yeah. Um, unhelpful advice. Unhelpful advice with new breading. Sounds black. Sounds
racist. Uh, deep Asian. Uh, deep Asian. That's the, that's the deep Asian. I started an e-commerce
business with a close friend of mine a couple of years ago, and it's been doing well. But this
partner of mine just one day went up and said, fuck it. I'm done because we weren't making what
he imagined. Now I'm stopped picking up the pieces and also contemplating our friendship.
Some friends of mine say, ha, don't go into business with your friends, but in hindsight
is 2020. And those shmucks have no balls to go into business. I'm really at a crossroads. I
don't want to give up my business, but I also don't want to hold grudges. Should I hate my friend
for throwing up his gloves? I mean, you guys have all worked with people in business. Well,
if he's no longer working with this guy, just continue the business without him. Is that what
the case is? Or is he still, why would he hold a grudge if, you know, buy him out or whatever
it might be? You know what I mean? Either find another fucking partner or do it yourself. I
mean, it's like if you went into show, uh, let's say Theo and like the 11th hour, Theo says, fuck
this. And now you're left to be the only one handling everything. First of all, you know,
Bobby's the one who's going to say fuck this. I don't think so in that situation. Ooh, quick
to respond. Yeah. I don't get it. Okay. I mean, I present that. No, wait. You don't want to
respond. In your defense, that's a coin toss. Maybe, maybe. Yeah. But, um, I think in that
specific situation with me and Theo, I think I'm the one that's kind of pushing it. Right.
You know what I mean? I'm the one that's, come on, let's go. Let's do this. Let's do this. Right.
And he's kind of like, whatever, man. Yeah, I'll do whatever, man, whatever you want. You know
what I mean? But it's like, you know, but in that situation, but is he losing? What I'm asking is,
is he still in the business with this guy? Uh, no. Then what's the problem is the, well,
I think it's the idea of going in with someone that you're a team and then they're like,
you're building this thing and they just bounce. Right. Then you have the, the business to yourself.
They make more money. I mean, again, the, if they were, if the guy was fair to him and the
business is still in existence, I don't, I mean, it's like, what are you? Are you a lonely? What's
the problem? Like then get another partner. Yeah. And also you have to allow people,
it's like when someone breaks up, like the woman who broke up with him, it's like,
yeah, I'm not going to, you can't, there's a line from that, uh, movie from our youth, Bobby,
the truth about cats and dogs. Uh, yeah. Where she said, you can't argue your way out of dumped.
It's like, you can't argue your way out of like, I don't want to do this anymore. You can't force
someone to do jack shit. Yeah. It's like, my therapist told me the other day, Bobby, you're
allowed to change your mind. Yeah. Yes. And that was a complete sentence. Yeah. As long as you are
dignified and kind about it, I think like, yeah, the, a huge Asian comedy star, Ali Wong.
Um, I mean, huge, huge Asian comedy star. I mean, and on Netflix multiple times,
with animated, just her fucking a movie. I mean, she's got the whole fucking
audition for her stuff that I never get them. I, that must be pretty hard. Yeah. So I understand.
I understand. It must be pretty hard. The lines long to, um, you could of course be
her stunt double. It hurts. Audition for that. Couldn't get it. Fuck.
It hurts. It hurts. Bobby, we got to get you back into class. Um, the, uh, the, um, Ali always says,
uh, Clare, Clarity is kindness. Yes. Clarity is kindness. So if you're clear and you're like,
Hey, I know that this is going to fucking hurt and I hate doing it, but this is where I am.
I think it's fair. Like if that's what is his, if the clarity doesn't come as a blind side,
if you cannot just drop a bomb on someone without, that to me is not kindness at all.
If someone were to just pretend that everything was hunky dory for eight years and then one day
say, Hey, today I want, I want this, this, this is over. I don't want this. I hate all of these
things about you and I'm done. Well, that's, that sounds like, this guy sounds like he had a chain.
Like it's not, he's not mad at the guy. He just is like, I don't, I think you can say,
I don't want to date you anymore and you are allowed to blind. So I mean, so to speak. But
if you go, this is, I never tell people why I'm, why I don't want to date them anymore.
Cause it's, it's, I don't want them to obsess about it. You know what I mean? Like,
cause most of the time when people tell you why it's, it's the girl broke up with me 10 years ago
or more than that 11 years ago, cause she said I was gay with Gerard Carmichael. He came out
10 weeks ago. So he was, she saw something that literally neither of us. Like I didn't upset
it. Like you just wanted to break up with me. So like those rude reasons why I think it's like,
I don't, I don't think we're a good match or it doesn't work for me or whatever.
Or I think there's a way to, instead of sort of like, just kind of hint, what do you do?
You hint? Cause that says, that to me is rude or cause you're lying for three months.
I think where I'm getting at is if you're not addressing the problems on the way,
like if you're just internalizing everything, cause you don't have the balls to have uncomfortable
conversations along the way. And then one day you just hit your limit and you're like,
fuck it. I'm done. This is done. Um, I think you, but I think you're talking again,
your tone is like, fuck this. You're flipping the table. Because what I'm saying is you bring
stuff up along the way. They fix it. They don't cause I think you can fix stuff and people are
like, I still don't like it. The reason is because I've been on the other end of that.
I've been the one who's been just so brutally honest and I thought I was being clear and kind
when in fact I was being fucking cruel. I agree. But I, that's, I think the tone is what you're
talking about. Like I, you said brutally honest, Ali saying clarity is kindness. It's not like harsh
clarity. It's like, look, I feel, I feel awful cause I don't think this relationship can continue.
And I also, I, even when people are blindsided, I think it's because they, like they put up
their own blinders. I think every human being, and you, you and I could probably attest to this
one. Every human being senses every single relationship. That's a really good point. You're
right. You can sense every single fucking what everyone thinks. I know what everyone thinks of
me and everyone thinks. When people go, uh, uh, uh, like someone so doesn't like me, you're right.
So you're saying we sort of, uh, we're always going to sort of see it coming.
Yeah. I do. I mean, I personally do. Like, like I, if you're honest, you know what I mean? Like,
I've never been like blindsided, blindsided. Um, you can, it's almost like I remember I dated a
girl and you said that's the craziest girl I've ever seen. Yes, wait, wait, wait. Uh, this is
12 years ago and you were like, that girl's energy is so crazy. And the minute I met her,
I thought I had the premonition that I was gonna yell get the fuck away from
All right, but she was so hot
She was hot. Yes, I do remember now. Yes very hot. Yes, but she was I just could tell oh no no no no no
No, yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, and but I got why you were there. Yeah, right everybody did cheated
Yeah, I actually said when I'm crazy hot chicks when I I do yeah, I can't do it
Yeah, I can't even you know because I've seen comics go
She's hot though, and I go yeah, but how do you deal with because that that's not worth it
Yeah, nothing is not worth dealing with no, it's not it's not I actually said to her toward the end I go look at you I
You know how crazy you have to be for me to not want to date you
Look at your fucking gorgeous. Yeah, and you're so out of your mind out of your mind
Yes, that I cannot so like I knew and that's exactly how it ended like when you see a
Really ugly fat man dating a really hot chick, right? Right? He you know, he's just absorbing
He's that one guy going I'll do it. I'm never gonna get this
You know me so I'm gonna I'm willing to absorb all
Yeah, like his nerve endings are shot. Yeah, I mean the his his organs are at 40 percent, you know
You know nothing's really working so I could understand he has to bandwidth for that level of yeah
Insanity who which the the old man. Oh well the old fat man. The old fat man. Yeah. Yeah, and you know about his nerve endings
But you know what I also love is because a lot of people say I'll think to myself
I go I know that company or they don't like me and then sometimes my therapist or my AA sponsor will go
It's in your head, right? Sometimes it is sometimes, but I love it when I'm right
So, oh, I love one of us. So this is what happened. So I was um for years, right?
I just in my head. I would tell people comedy central as a company
They just aren't fans, right and my manager and people would go now. It's in your head. It's ridiculous
Yeah, right stop thinking that and then our so Jordy
Fox around there, right? Mm-hmm. Who was it one of the executives there? Yeah, I love him, too
Yeah, good. I started with them and I would die for that guy. He's the best, right?
he went to all things comedy and so I was hanging out with them maybe a month ago at
The 50th anniversary at the comedy star and he goes, you know, he goes, you know, I'm I've always been a fan
I know because you've always called me and tried to help me and he goes and I'm sorry that
Comedy Central wasn't a fan. Oh
You've started crying. No, I go I was right. I was right. Yeah. Yeah, my instincts aren't wrong about these things
No, yeah. Yeah, and it's fine to fucking sometimes they are but sometimes they're not sometimes the yeah
But you know that this thing that I told you about elitism and there's a group that is true. There is that thing
It's not my head. No, it's not right, but I think it's thinking that you were a part of it
Yeah, is not true. That's it's fucking
Fundamentally not all right and I got that today. I because I'm on I'm in the same boat or I'm like these people like
Yeah, even no one wants me to be in stuff. They go you write it like and it's like I don't want to I dude
I haven't done that in fucking forever. I'm not bombing on I'm like killing as hard as all the people you want to work with
So what's what's the matter with me? But it's
No, everyone once they see you a certain way. They see a certain way
I think I think one that's in the real quick though
I think you're right because the Instagram the post I did see you you were in a photo with Nick roll
Ali Wong and John Mulaney, but you were on the side kind of pop popping your head in yes
That's what and I got it got it got it right
Right, you were in the corp or somebody cropped in a way that your eye did not go to me right and also
It also looked like you were walking into the shot. Yeah
Yeah, you weren't really supposed to be there. Yeah, okay, you're right. Yeah, let me go ahead
Yeah, I have a question. So let's suppose
You know comedy central doesn't like you and the other it's just in your head, right?
What regardless of what it is?
How does that determine how you feel about yourself how you cope with it or how you move forward?
I think the general rule is and this is a fact in life. Not everyone is gonna like you
Yeah, not you're gonna that's just the nature of life
So you're saying regardless of what it is you're going to proceed as you proceed anyway
So what is the point of trying to deliberate which one it is?
Do they like me? Do they not is it comedy central? Is it in my head? It doesn't matter
You're gonna stay in this you've chose and that's what I fucking have done
That's right. I haven't stopped but I'm also but to your other thing. It's like you have to do a danger
Assessment you have to know like is it worth pitching when they go we should pitch somewhere and you go
There's no point pitching that no we shouldn't you're like I I I'm telling you I know the lady
The last time I saw her her energy was so foul
There's no point. Yeah, yeah, like there's no point like there
I know what the I just there's no I know what the I can read human energy
Yeah, and that's bad human energy now. I have misread it a couple times
But like not I I think I've been right more than wrong
Yeah, you are right. It's weird. There are some instances is that a right word, right?
Incidences. Mm-hmm. No, but go ahead. Okay, where I they're never gonna tell you
They're right where I'm auditioning for something and I walked out of there literally going
They hated me and I've gotten it. Yeah. Yes. Okay. Yeah, so there are those moments, right?
But I had to I was gonna say the story again. I don't give a fuck, right?
and I'm gonna say the company I
pitched to adult swim
and
In room this is way before before before Tiger Valley really and a week later
I just happened to be at the party and the guy I pitched to was there and he looks at me and he goes
Hey, dude, you should pitch to come in and pitch something
and
I mean I the fewer I
The fury in my heart, right? It's still there. If you open my heart, that would be there
You would say adult swim in heirloom in heirloom, right? Grudging, right?
Anyway, hey Neil. Um, that was a pleasure. Yeah, pleasure was all mine. Now. Let me ask you this
How are you feeling about is your resentment toward Tiger Valley dismissed a bit? I I
Never had any resentment. It's what do you have when you feel rejected by something?
Right, like you feel defensive and like misunderstood
But you know, I wasn't like fuck them. Do you feel defensive and misunderstood right now? No, I feel you know how I feel
Yeah
vindicated
Okay, you know how I feel cuz you know what you know what I'm gonna confidently say what top 20 guests of all time
All right, and can I tell you what I feel good and shame not having you on sooner. That's all you can ask for
Okay. Yeah, and I apologize. I accept Wow. Hey show anything. Yeah, let's promote. Yeah, my little play
I'm doing my play Jesus
Aunt Bobby
Neil's doing a play
No, I'm doing a stand-up one-man show. I'm gonna be in Phoenix
soon 9 10
11 July what room and
No, I'm doing the club cuz they didn't end up live wasn't available
I
Think so, okay, one of them go one click go on my website
And I'm doing the comedy works in Denver because there were no theaters available
What are the best of America? I totally agree June 30th July 1st and 2nd and then hit view all please
Chicago is sold out Chicago's the next one Chicago sold out Philly
DC Atlanta Jersey couple Jersey dates go on neil brennan dot-com slash shows
Amazing Bobby you're gonna be at Montreal. No, I was gonna invite you to a party
What kind of party is it elitist one come on? It's the winner circle
Really? Yeah, it's winners. Oh, I winners only. Okay. I want to say this now. This is another story
This is a fuck. Okay, grudgy, baby, grudgy, baby, grudgy, baby, little one, right?
So one day we were at the comedy store. Mm-hmm, and you look at me you go. Hey, you want to go to this party?
Mm-hmm, so I go right and it's Seth Meyers's birthday party, right?
And you know, I was on Seth and Josh's brother
They've always loved me and in fact when Seth did the awesome cartoon on Hulu. I was one of the cast members
So here's a good one. He at one point they he said he wrote a part for me and then somehow there wasn't a part for me
For awesome. Yeah
And that's my like one of my closest friends, right, I don't fucking know man
Like you can't make people do shit, right?
So at that party I left immediately because I can't I want to bring this because I don't want to start a war with this guy
But I ran into a guy that I felt like I was super kind to but then at that point
He was kind of a star. Mm-hmm. You know who it is. Yeah, and he was so rude to me
He came up to me was what the fuck are you doing here? Whoa?
Try to think of who it was. Yeah, I'll tell you afterwards. No, I know you well
Yeah, I will tell you after work, but I want to sit on the air. What weeks ago. I just saw him walking. That's great
But I just I don't know why but you sang inviting me to the Montreal party
Yeah, that's the island bite. I'm like, yeah calm. I don't but I'm a different guy now
And I'm also in a different status in my career like I feel so much more like I know who I am like I'm right
I'm Bobby Lee man. Yeah, I've done too much work. Yeah and things to like I know I find a way
I sell out every show. I know who I am. Yeah, I'm on great shows. Yeah, I know what I'm doing
Yeah, so anyway,吗? I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm look
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