TigerBelly - Ep 379: Yannis Pappas and John Stamos

Episode Date: December 21, 2022

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Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly ad free on Amazon music download the app today Dude listen Lila, where's your mom you came in with fucking guess who's outside Pete Sampras. She's not I'm bringing every Greek yeah, yeah, but I have another so I have a my sister from the Philippines was upstairs You know loves Pete Sampras. Yes. I am Pete Sampras. What are we talking about? Yeah? Yeah? It Greeks. I'm trying to get all the Greeks in here. Yeah, there's three my No, no, have you ever had the full spectrum of Greek genetics on this couch? From hot I didn't even know you were fucking Greek bro, bro. You didn't know it's gonna. No, that's that's the first information
Starting point is 00:00:47 I'm trying to absorb you're fucking great. I'm Greek. I'm yeah, you would I hate Greeks Also, that's the number one so I'm trying to absorb that yeah number two. You know mean yeah, you bring this guy over here's the deal Yeah, he's working for me. Yeah, he's not working for you John say something We're really really good friends and he said I'm going to do Bobby Lee's podcast So I'm a huge fan. I do you know this I've told you this before I said can I go it's an I think yeah We go and not and here we are. Oh, okay. Well, I love that story. Well, you know, that's a pretty good story It's rare that we have it like I was just telling great Greeks my buddy lives down the street Yeah, the friends I was saying, you know, it's so cool that we just take a day and fuck around with him and come see you
Starting point is 00:01:28 Oh, I love you and I've all I love you. He loves you. He was like a big fan of Ali You like I love you think it was Ali Wong you're not no No, Randall Park. No, I thought I thought it was Tommy Lee Why are you guys are so cute together and I want to get to the bottom Also, can I just say a side note you bring this fucking guy over Garcia, I mean, I'm But I had a show right that that NBC now has right yeah, and we were looking for showrunners and we said no to him We say no we met we met and then Peter Kim said I go, what are you looking for in a showrunner?
Starting point is 00:02:19 He goes, I'd love an Asian gay showrunner. I go. I'm maybe one. You're not gay. No Or Asian I'm more gay than Asian. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah, so I said no I said no no go find a showrunner that you want but then I still met with him in my backyard and I helped out Yeah, well, no, but we were you were like one of the two. Okay. Yeah, I'm lying You didn't you didn't hurt my fear. Yeah. Oh good. Good. It's all good because you came up alright fine I'm good to see you man. It's good to see you a fuck you. Yeah, listen. Fuck you man It's a small town. Sometimes you bad decisions come back to haunt Bobby. I don't know you well You fucked up by not I just realized just that I'm 30 years one of my dearest friends best showrunner in town
Starting point is 00:02:59 I second how did this couple dumb be become a thing? I know you just talked about him for a couple years And did that sort of bring you guys together? I've been watching the secret and so I started going I want to be friends with John. Oh, you're manifesting. I'm manifesting. I didn't know into existence I said I want to be friends with John Stamos. I want to be I did the same thing about I want to be on Tiger Belly. I want I want Bobby Lee to not return my text And it manifest right. Yeah. Yeah So, you know what's so funny? I was like years ago. I was like because I was eating heroes Appreciate that. How do you say it? How do you say it? Did it right? And I was like, why is that not racist?
Starting point is 00:03:38 It's a g y ro am I saying right? You know, you know, you know, you know, I was eating a hero I got those fucking greasy. It's not a hero. You know, you know, you know, you know, yeah, you know, yeah, you know I go, you know, those hairy white-ish people that live by that sea The Greeks, right? I don't know nobody from there. You know, I mean, and I manifested you I think, bro I think we've been manifested each other. You mean those weird. You mean I saw the movie to the wedding one. I loved it. Yeah Yeah, I love that shit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was our calling card right there. Yeah I didn't know Stamos was fucking Greek stamp John Stamos. It's the same name as me. His name in Greek is Yanni Stamos We're both. Oh, I was eating at a deli and I manifested Kanye. Am I going to get in trouble?
Starting point is 00:04:23 Oh, yeah, you can't. Yeah. Yeah. So you manifested Kanye. Yeah. Yeah. Can I just ask you, John? Can I ask you a question? Yeah, sure. Bro, you look so good. I do. I'm a little bit tired, but um, no, you look so young and good. You look like You know, back in the day when we, you know, I mean, what's the show with Bob with Bob? Oh, but rest in peace. Yeah, look, I wore this for you because I know you guys at the comedy store, right? Your picture, your big picture and then Bob's big picture. Yeah. Yeah. Did you? Yeah. So we don't want to bum. We don't want to. Yeah. Yeah. I brought his name. It's not my bad. It's all right. He's Jewish. He was Jewish. Yeah. You guys are buddies, huh? I like, I loved him a lot. Yeah. We never hung out, but he was always like kind to me. He was a kind man. You know what I mean? And that's funny too. That goes a long way with me. It's like,
Starting point is 00:05:09 you know, somebody that's like at his level and when they're kind and generous to the younger folks, you remember that forever, dude. You know, um, I can't say that about Christopher Titus. No, you know, I fucking hate that guy. Yeah, he was kind of rude to me. Do you know what he do? I was at the improv years ago, 20 years ago. I did a set. I was so nervous and I got off and I did okay. And he just, I never met him before. He just walks up to me goes, nice dick jokes. Right. And I did pull my dick out. That was my closer. Right. What are you going to do? I open close with it. You know what I mean? And he was just so offended that I was even on stage. And you know, when somebody treats it like that, you will never forget.
Starting point is 00:05:50 Right. Right. And you harbor that shit. Right. Like, uh, like Greg does about not getting your show. It's all you talked about in the way over. John was like, I should come with you. He was like, I want to fucking come with you. Can I see this dude? I asked, okay, go ahead. No, no, go ahead. Go ahead. Okay. I want to say to you. All right. I fucking asked at that time. I think we were at CBA. What ABC or CBS? I was at CBS and I go, I only want to see the top three. Yeah. Showrunner. Yeah. Right. Yeah. And you were one of them. Yeah. Did that feel good? I think that they shielded from you that I said I didn't want to do the project. Oh, you passed. Yeah. I didn't know. No, I passed. I didn't know. But I felt bad. So I still helped him in my backyard for a little bit.
Starting point is 00:06:42 But yeah, I actually passed. Wait, wait, wait, wait. So you went with Peter to some random backyard and what'd you guys do? We broke a story. Oh, wow. I helped him break a story in my backyard. I talked to him about pilots, how to write pilots. I tried to help him out because he's a nice guy. He is a nice guy. Yeah. Thank you so much for doing that, you know, and thank you for passing. My pleasure. And I was too busy with my new show, Sprung on Amazon. So please, please watch Sprung on Amazon. Yeah. Let me ask you something. Let me ask you something. Absolutely. Do I have to audition for your show? Yes, you do. No, I would have to read. I would offer you a part.
Starting point is 00:07:18 Would you really? Yeah. Not a lot of lines, though. No, no, no, no. I know what I'm dealing with. And I also don't like dialogues that's like a human being wouldn't say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I just did one of those where it was like the dialogue with big chunks of lines and like no one talks like this. Yeah. I can't get my mind around it. Yeah. So just do that and I will read. No, no. Absolutely. I'll read. Yeah, you're in. Yeah. Okay. Good. Thank you. Is Sprung good or? Sprung's excellent. Sprung's excellent. John will tell you. It's excellent. You guys are fascinating. John, so let me do the intro how I know normally do it. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Yeah. Wait, what? No, no, that was on radio.
Starting point is 00:07:54 No, no, we're going to keep that in. Yeah, but um. You're on Sex of the Season now, right? Yeah, why? Yeah, why? Well, I think that's great. Well, thank you. That's how I convinced him to come over. He was like Bobby Hoot and I was like. Oh, so the credits I had before wasn't he had no. No, I Yeah, he really thought it was Tommy Lee's house. Oh, really? Yeah. No, I am. I'm pretty furlough on the whole thing. I said, listen, he's on. I said he's on Sex in the City and he went, okay, I'll do it. Yeah, I have three lines of show. What the fuck? Well, I didn't tell him that part. That's good. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Thank you for doing that. Are we done? No, we're done. How long does it go? John, no. John, it's going to last about an hour. Yeah. I'm a fan. I've said that a hundred times, but I really am. And you're not as, um.
Starting point is 00:08:36 Asian? No, you want to say that. You're not as Asian as you look on TV. No, no, no. You're not as nutty. I mean, like out of it, like I think sometimes I think like he's got a screw or two loose when I see you, but now you see him, you know, not like that. Normal. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, because I feel the opposite when I'm around you. I'm like, this guy's so in pocket. He's so like sarcastic, sarconic. Yeah. And just you're straight, man. Really? No. No. What? I'm being sarcastic. That's sarcasm? Yeah. Oh, I didn't read that. Yeah. Yeah. No, you're wrong. I mean, you're in pajamas and flip flops. These are pajamas. Well, they look like pajamas. And these are fancy. They're Spanx. How much are these? Um, couple hundred bucks. Yeah, those are like the old school, old school lot of ones. All right. Go fuck yourself. All right. I don't go to the gap and get changed. All right. Look at those fucking pants. You've painted your toenails, but one of them is not painted. It's chipped. I painted his fingernails. Yeah. Yeah. It's chipped. Did they get into an accident? What do you mean? They were chipped. No, they got long. And why? How long is this podcast? How long have you guys been doing this podcast? No, I'm serious. I'm going to ask you some questions. I love this podcast. Seven, eight years on our eighth year. Eighth year, yeah. Wow. And oh, yeah, that's great. And no, no, I'm not being, now I remember. And you guys, and why did we break up? It's just, we were together for almost 10 years. Wow. I remember thinking like you had a hot girl. I thought you, I mean, everybody thinks that, right? Yeah, they all think that. Yeah. Yeah. I'm hot. I mean, I'm hot too. You're funny. You're a nice man. Yeah. You got some. But you know what? I'm going to say that I have a mythological hotness. He does. Yeah. Yeah. What's mythological about it? No, it's like, you know, J token would probably write me in as a hot hob at a whatever. I think you have an attractive energy. Very, very, very, very. I take offense to this. Let me ask you something. No, it's true. I'll be, I'll be real with you, right? Because I'm single now. Don't offense, baby. You're not going to take his pants off. Don't call me, baby, when you say that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Switch tweets. But when I'm going to say this right, let me ask you, be honest, right? Okay. You don't think that I'm sexy. I want, from your heart, your Greek heart, you don't think that I'm sexy.
Starting point is 00:10:35 Why don't you ask a sexy guy? Yeah, why? You're next. You're coming to me. I didn't mean being. You're fucking next. I go to ugly first. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I work the ugly. And now you want me to say yes after you. I don't feel like I rest. I already know what the answer is going to be. So give it to me, baby. I said, you have an attractive energy. That sucks. That's great. That's the best. Look what you got out of it. I mean, I know I understand that, but she put that out. I'd like to explain myself. I grew up in Asia and I grew up watching a lot of sumo wrestling with my dad. And so those were the guys that I would like salivate over because I was thought of these guys as like the supreme beings. I was like, I love them, fat and powerful. Right. And so when I met Bobby, I was one out of two. Yeah. But he's more like little and portly. Yeah, but you know, he has a sumo energy about it. He does. He has a massive attractive energy. That's what I would say. He's very attractive. Yeah. So the shell's broken. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. What was your question? 8 or 10 years ago together. And it was just kind of recent earlier this year. Okay. I mean, Mr. Stamos, can I say something? Call me John. Okay, John. Thank you. Master John. Good. Yeah. I'm Asian. That feels comfortable. My wife is Filipino. My mother-in-law is full Filipino. Oh, I love, you know, yeah, I love the culture as well. I really do. Yeah. You know, We're the best. We're the best. But you grew up in where? I grew up in Cebu, in the Philippines. Really? And I didn't come here until I was in high school. Oh, wow. Yeah. You sound very, what's your name? You sound a one way and you look very enthralled. You don't hear any accent from her. No, no. That's crazy. Where did you guys meet?
Starting point is 00:12:30 On Tinder. Oh, my nanny today said she sees you on Hinge. And we were looking for your thing. What? Not your thing, but your profile. What? Your profile. And are you also on the, what's the good one? The riot. The riot, no match. We were trying to find you on there too. Yeah, yeah. I'm on that, but no match. What's that mean? Nobody likes me on that. Right? That's like that different level. Swedish supermodels that are DJs, they're not my thing, right? Hinge, I'm doing well. Right. I'm killing on a Hinge. We were trying to find you on there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you have to go through the, you can't Google, you know, there's no search engine. Where's Bobby Lee on there? But what are we, but if you try to find her on there, could you find? No, you can't. You just have to go through the fucking, the stable. I love that you came here with the, you wanted to start with the most comfortable topic. What? Let me tell you guys something happened this morning and maybe you can, I can get an opinion from you guys. All right. Is it guy thing? It's a guy thing, right? Garcia. Garcia, you in? Yeah. All right. Do we have another mic for him or is it? I think we only have these many. Dax Shepard had seven mics when I was. We had a lot of mics. That was funny. This episode of Tiger Belly is brought to you by Zipix toothpicks. You guys, I'm nine months in without having a cigarette. And the reason why I've been able to do it is because of Zipix. In fact, when I go to the comedy store, all the dormant in the parking lot people, they go, where can you get me some Zipix because it's helping them to quit smoking. This stuff really does work. It's got some of these have two milligram of nicotine. Some of them have three milligrams of nicotine. And also Gilbert, you do this one, right? The caffeine one. It's better than coffee, guys. Honestly, you don't get that like down high, whatever you call it, but this is really great.
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Starting point is 00:14:58 You put a little bit of apple cider vinegar. You know how I know that you do that? How? Because we all do that because we all want to live forever. We all want to have a healthy lifestyle and we want the best for our bodies. And that's why Ag1 is the best in the world, guys. And it's because we know we are consuming 75 high quality vitamins, minerals, whole food source, superfoods, probiotics and adaptogens to help us start our day right. It's the best, man. You know, usually my grandmother used to give me vitamins, like 52,000 vitamins. I don't want to take 52,000 vitamins. You get one scoop of this, you get all of them, man. And it's keto friendly, paleo friendly, vegan, dairy free, all of the things. Doesn't have all the nasty sugar.
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Starting point is 00:16:14 All right. So this morning I matched with this blonde girl from Hinge, right? Was her name Taylor? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Wait, is that the person that? Yeah, my nanny, we were just at the house. I said, well, I'm going to go see Bobby. He's on Hinge all the time. Did she match with him? Did she say yes to him? No, she said she swiped the other way.
Starting point is 00:16:37 No, she was trying to find him or something, right? Yeah, but why didn't she, she doesn't like me? No, she does. I mean, she's not single anymore. Oh, she's not single anymore. Let me try to get on the phone. But I was trying to... Well, how about this? We'll do the phone call. Let me just, because I need your full, Mr. Stamos, I mean, John, I need your full fucking attention. You're not going to get that.
Starting point is 00:16:54 No, I'm not. Can I try? Can I try? Bob thought you were so fucking funny too. I just remembered some stuff too, because I always said I wanted to meet you. And I saw you at the comedy store a couple of times in the hallways. Yeah, yeah. Because when I look at you, I honestly, can I be real with you? No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:17:12 I'm intimidated by you. Please, come on. Not anymore. I see you right through it. It's bullshit. Yeah, totally. Well, when he comes in here with me, it kind of lowers his stature. Yeah, but he's got this like weird polyester-y kind of suit, you know what I mean? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:26 Anyway, he's a real person. You look good, dude. So, can I tell you the story? Well, we played all day yesterday, and then late last night. I'm tired. But that's why I'm so happy to see you. So how was the break? I was like, who broke up with who?
Starting point is 00:17:39 Let me finish this. I'm not trying to be funny. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you Filipino too? Yeah. You can't tell? Shaka. That's Hawaiian.
Starting point is 00:17:47 Shaka. Shaka. Alright, that's Hawaiian. But anyway. So I match with this girl on Hinge, right? Yeah. And I go, so, you know, we match and I go, hey-o. Oh, hey-o.
Starting point is 00:17:59 How do you spell that? What? That's my opening. Oh, no, that's not a good one. I know, I've never done that before. I've never done that before. I'll tell you what we like after that. Go ahead.
Starting point is 00:18:07 What do you like? I like high with a lot of eyes. I've done that. They never respond. Hi. Yeah, I know. Hey-o. Hey-o, she responded.
Starting point is 00:18:15 But she responded. How do you spell hey-o first? So I went H-E-Y-O. Hey. Exclamation mark. Hey-o! Right? And she didn't answer back?
Starting point is 00:18:23 She did. Oh. But this is her response. Okay, go ahead. Yeah, okay. She responded. So the first thing, I think, is a photo of me and Theo Vaughan. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:18:33 And she goes, hey, I don't want you to feel like shit, but can you tell Theo Vaughan? I think you're fucking he's hot. Oh, that's rough. And I literally almost started to cry. Oh, God. Who's Theo Vaughan? Exactly. That was the first thought in my mind, like, why would you know that piece of shit?
Starting point is 00:18:51 Right? Why would you put a picture of yourself there? Yeah, why would you? Because I thought it was gonna be a thirst trap. This kind of you know, no one will care about picture you and me Let's do that. Yeah, let's take take it right now. Oh, here's what we're gonna do after this podcast I am gonna put it take a photo of you and I yeah, right yeah sitting on the couch, right? And I'm gonna use that as one of my profile. Yeah, please. Yeah. Yeah, but if I get any of like
Starting point is 00:19:12 Hey, can you tell John Stamos? I said hi. It'll break my fucking heart. You don't want to do that Maybe what you're going about it wrong. Okay. Well, that's why I'm asking you This is a trick girls have known for a long time. All right You want to take a picture with someone who's much less attractive. Thank you. Yep. You don't want to be famous Famous is fine, but either way you want to go. You're famous enough. You're famous famous So you want to go with someone less attractive like take a picture Tim Dillon with Tim Dillon, right? Then you look like John Stamos I want to be the John Stamos in the photo
Starting point is 00:19:43 I you don't want to have John Stamos in the photo but theoretically I mean what you're saying is that you're you're already out allowed saying that Theo Vaughn is more attractive than I am. You have a beautiful energy I see I see so yeah, that's very good. Yeah, so basically you're saying he's better looking I mean it's not it's what it is. Can I just ask you a couple of questions? Absolutely. So in terms of good energy or whatever How about me compared to someone like? Um Anthony Chazalek your energy is much better. Okay, good. So you're one of my favorite energies I come in here like it's kind of like probably what what clouded the looks for you. It's his energy It's like a smoke bomb and you walk in and you're like you probably didn't even see him for the first time
Starting point is 00:20:25 I genuinely from the bottom of my heart think Bobby is hot He is and I do too, but I think that's sort of like the what's that superhero that has the smell that puts on you I'm a Thurman. What was that thing? Poison Ivy Poison Ivy. Yeah, you come in here, and it's just like And you're just what I'm poison Ivy. Yeah, you know, you're lovable. I just like I want to suck it. Right. Yeah Yeah, basically I did like air format or what Bill Cosby did Use the pill. Yeah, I want to cuddle you. No, I'm not that okay I think your mind is twisted right now, and I think can I just say this you're doing the east coast thing Okay, right you're doing you don't I look very east coast to you right now
Starting point is 00:21:04 No, I just walked in with I know right and an American. I you're right. You're right What's other podcast guys came in with fucking one of the cast from Full House? You're right. You're right. Yeah, but I have to stand to say this because right because you know me yeah What I'm saying is is that you're wrong? I'll tell you why okay, okay? Can I ask a question? Yeah, go Eight years you've been doing this like yeah Go ahead so what I'm saying is this all right you fucking greasy fucker Yeah, I'm telling you I've been dating no offense Yeah, I've been dating other women from variety of different things right and they look at me and they think they tell me right to
Starting point is 00:21:45 My eyes right that I'm fucking sexy as fuck, and I don't think they're lying right right I really am sexy to them if you weren't funny. Do you think they would say that? Oh my god? I'm just being honest. Why have you seen my wife? Have you ever seen my wife hot? She's a hottie the only one out of the three of us that would still have a hot wife if we weren't funny or talented is right? Darcy I think you're right. You know no not you for sure. No my wife It's because yeah funny. Yeah, I mean you look like a car and Rick I mean you work at a county fair. Absolutely. Yeah, yeah with the shooting machine couldn't agree more. Yeah. Yeah I mean you have a meth thing
Starting point is 00:22:20 And that's why like I mean that's why you're incredible. Yeah, it's like Rick Rubin when you first see him He's like this factory back in the wrong about Rick Rubin. I know back in the day We used to see him at the comedy store and he used to be like you didn't know who he was You're like, is this a homeless fat man? I'm telling you he came out of the water I saw him at a beach and he looked like a magical man. My point is Garcia. Yeah, right you I love it because you're like You look like one thing, but you're the other absolutely and I feel like I'm the same way then too every picture of my wife And I looks like a kidnapping Like our Christmas card she should be holding like a newspaper
Starting point is 00:22:52 Yeah, yeah, that's that's really funny. That's yeah dates and stuff. Yeah Group group of life. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, so we're the same in that way. Yeah, absolutely, right I like that a bunch intro the show. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, anyway, do the content 5 4 ladies Welcome to fuck the countdown. All right. We're deep in it, right? Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly I'm your host Bobby Lee. We've got Kalyla in the room, right? We got fucking Gilbert in the room All right, we got these two guys this guy. We got Amos Yan Yan Garcia, we got the whole clan give them a round of applause. Is it you're leaving? Are you leaving? Yeah, what John John John yeah, yeah, yeah, you guys you're he's loud. He's hiding his face on. Yeah, don't like your face
Starting point is 00:23:57 He's high. Yeah, he's high. Oh, are you high right now? Why do you always look high? This guy's the fucking best. He's great. He's the greatest. Right. So you are you guys are close friends and we've become friends Yeah, I love them to death. He's great. Well, how did it first start? You did his part. Did he actually reach out to me? Believe it or not. Oh, I was like saying all these funny things about me and they were very flattering and I think we were Florida something and yeah, I guess I reached out but um, there's not a good story. No, no, I make it up He was just like, hey, I think you're funny and I was like mr. Stamos Right. So weird. Yeah. And then how long have you guys been hanging out then? About a year. Oh, that's cool. Over a year. Yeah, a little bit over a year with the Greek thing and then
Starting point is 00:24:43 Yeah, we're both Greek too. So that helps. Yeah, we talked about it. There's not a lot of us. How long have you guys been up now? Four months. Four months. Say five or six months. No way longer than that. It was it. Well, I mean technically no, I have to say this Technically what we put out there was four months ago. Yeah, but we've been separated for a while. Are you still It's okay. You guys are who was who broke up? I mean, was it it can be mutual, right? It's a mutual. Seriously. You were like, okay. Is that we did you guys know what kids didn't want to get married or anything? We did at one point, but um, yeah, yeah, yeah, right. Did you go to counseling at all? Yeah, we did the counseling thing. Yeah, John And we did that. Yeah, you know, we've done other things too. We read books
Starting point is 00:25:22 We communicated. We did the whole fucking thing and I don't know why you're bringing it up again We already went through that And we're still doing the podcast together. Obviously we're friends and we love each other and the future is like wide open Has she brought any dudes home yet? No, no, we don't do that. We haven't done that. We don't I think he hit the ground running I'm taking a slower approach. Yeah. Yeah, okay. Very mature. Very mature. I commend you both Oh, thank you. And I love you both very dearly and I it's very uh, it's very Very inspiring to see and it makes me want to leave my wife. Oh god, what's so inspiring? I'm like, hey, I look at my wife and I'm like we could do it
Starting point is 00:26:01 This show is sponsored by a better help Unfortunately life doesn't come with a user manual. So when it's not working for you It's normal to feel stuck I felt suck so many times in my life and you know how you feel unstuck you do something about it And the way you do something about it is you do better help because it's the best online therapy in the market You feel free, you know, I mean all those, you know, um You know the trauma that's inside is stuck in your body. It gets released Yep, and these therapists are trained to help you figure out what's causing these challenging emotions and learn productive coping skills
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Starting point is 00:27:05 No waiting rooms, no traffic, no endless searching for the right therapist You know, this is something that I enjoy right now, I do see this It's this fucking machine every once in a while are we gonna die? Yeah, but what happens when you turn it up? There's no hot water. What we've been doing this eight years. I'm so sorry. Did you what are your ears? You must be made some money, right? How did you get? Yeah, yeah, how why you have two Scandinavian guys. Where did they come from with the Scandin Yeah, he's Spanish. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's from Spain. Oh, that's right. We're all we're all under one God We all that is true. Did you like Rickles Bobby? I loved him. You know, I never met him yet
Starting point is 00:28:07 He was a you know, like my father was like a father and Bob finally, you know, he didn't like comics He didn't he wanted to be the funniest guy. It was anyway He didn't like to hang out with comics too much But I you know, I kind of wedged Bob in and eventually Jeff Ross. He didn't like Jeff at first but that you know, he did and he was He was the great, you know, he was just the funniest crazy, but I was just my wife was you're not Rickles Don't do it, but he used to Joe's the world the same the Greeks know the Filipinos the Puerto Ricans well the Puerto Rican
Starting point is 00:28:34 Yeah, I had to tell him what schmuck bait meant like he never even he invented it. Yeah, but he didn't know the term and I think I Sarah Silver and I got him I said, are you doing schmuck what? I'm just doing Rickles, you know, you're real a man. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, have you been to the Philippines? I have not. No, my wife went off I don't know. You guys travel together. Yeah, we travel together. We're still working on it. No, that's two rooms. You get two rooms. You say I get my own And he tells me he comes home and he tells me all about his dates and I listen. That's great. Does it turn you? Yeah, how do you feel about it? Because I know this is like truly. Um, how do you feel about it? I don't know. I feel like we're like I like participating in your life. You know, I really do you don't feel initially It was hard because like I didn't want to hear it But by the time I was ready to hear it, it was really nice. It was sweet. Do you are you're quite your younger than yeah, I'm not I'm 38. Okay. Yeah, I'm 51. Yeah. Yeah, your wife's younger too. So is mine. Yeah
Starting point is 00:29:41 I mean, well, how many what's the year's difference the point being in show business is doing anything different Yeah, what's the year's different 14 years with me? Oh, wow yours three Why is that so funny, you know, it's weird because am I funnier than you thought? Dude Kind of just say that's right, but no, I know you don't like compliments. Well, let's not do it then. Yeah No, I want to hear it. I want to hear it. I want to hear it. I want to hear it Yeah, what were you gonna say for first of all, can I just say this? Yeah, love them. Yeah, you do You know, it's weird. I gotta be honest with you like it's just it's just so so much time has gone by you've known me a long time and
Starting point is 00:30:17 It just to have cool people like you say that it's just it's strange. You know, it's strange to me You know, I can I I'll say this I know Some people, you know, I mean, I know people that aren't in the stand-up comedy world that podcast They don't do it that well, but you feel like a stand-up comedian to me in terms of your timing in terms of just your Voice and you get comedy and it just feels like that. Thank you. That's the last fucking Ever fucking get what about my hair you I was I'm obsessed with stand-up. I could never do it. I will never do it. Yeah, but I study you guys I watch and girls I watched you guys, you know through Sagitt. I mean, I learned so much from Bob
Starting point is 00:30:58 But also I got to be you know a channeling I became friends with and a lot of these, you know, this is great And Dave was very very funny, too. I don't know if you know Kuey, but he's extremely. Oh, yeah Yeah, I would watch the way they would work these roller decks They keep in there, you know in their heads and where they would go and and then I just study you guys the timing the the brilliant I mean, he's really you are you both extremely funny, but I watch this guy go. Where's he getting this stuff? Where's I mean, he's so well-read, too And he couldn't you know he can I had lived for two or three hours. You've heard his podcast I know
Starting point is 00:31:26 But um take it but I love this craft of it I love the stud the science of comedy and he you know, I'll hit him up for jokes and stuff He'll send me something. It's like perfect, you know, anyway, so but he's already funny. I mean, I've known him for 25 years I was telling Yannis this earlier when I first met him About two weeks into when I met him. He goes, uh, are you uh, are you married? And I said, I'm actually getting married in a month and he goes. Oh, you met me at the wrong time Yeah, I feel like he would be fun like oh, yeah, he was single I was single Oh my god. No, I think my dick would be like scarred like purple heart, you know, it would award
Starting point is 00:32:07 So what people think but I I'm not I was kind of not that fun. There'd be a lot You you you you were fun. You were fun There were a few times my my wife and kids would go out of town and just to go out for the weekend I call him and go. Hey, they're out of town and it's a little fantasy camp for the weekend. Go out. You have fun Yeah, somebody one guy said to me because I want to be you for two days a week One day we went out we had fun Not crazy, but we stayed up pretty late and we were like, you know, we didn't you know, we were good boys We were both married
Starting point is 00:32:38 But you know, it's something I said something bad's gonna happen to us. I said, what? Or something bad. What do you mean karma? You know, so we do some bad. We do some bad things bad things Yeah, he says what if you do something good. Yeah, good things come here Son of a bitch goes off and writes earl and leaves me out of the money Yeah, that's the story he tells he tells everybody came up with my oh really. Yeah, so let me ask you something Yeah, karma. Uh-huh, right John Stamos Gives you a tv show. Yeah, and you stole it Um, just like you think I pat I you fired me and it's good to let you believe that
Starting point is 00:33:13 We'll let him believe that he came in came up with the idea for my you know what I love about why not Why Greg does that position in Hollywood that like does everything but gets none of the credit right? And he's also like a very big deal, but he's he his position is like he has to explain it He walks in you just like who's this guy? He's got like well. I've actually done this and that and that it's underappreciated It's funny because they were like they were like Stamos is gonna crash Tiger belly today, and I go I love tiger belly. I got the t-shirt. I love I love tiger belly They go you should come I go so we're gonna walk in and be like honest and John Stamos and this fucking I go I want to be this fucking guy. You are that guy
Starting point is 00:33:50 Yeah, you're still that guy, but my point is is that what a wonderful surprise? Yes, I know you clearly aren't that guy. He's one of the foot. He's one of the most valued Men in show business. I mean, you know show runners like there's ten great ones. He's one of them He doesn't give a shit about money He doesn't give shit like if he wants to do it He does it if he doesn't he doesn't but he's just the coolest bitch in this guy. I knew they would love to see you Yeah, can you imagine he wanted to be saying when I was at no boo. I was at no boo the other night Right, I was at no boo. I got a dessert and it's a shaved ice thing and they drizzle some fucking thing over it
Starting point is 00:34:21 Right. I got standard, right? I was eating in the middle of this though with this condensed milk That's what you are. Oh, thank you I was wondering where you were going I actually think the condensed milk is the star of the show is the star of the show. There you go You don't know what's there, right? It couldn't be a surprise. Why does fuck? Wide as fuck. Yeah, and like Garcia. What the fuck? But yeah, yeah, yeah The name doesn't fit but my point is is that you're the surprise. Yeah. Yeah named his third kid trace Trace Garcia. Yeah, three
Starting point is 00:34:52 He's a character we went for a joke. Yeah, he's a guy who like yeah, he doesn't see like you're right The cream in the middle like he drove a firebird for a lot like a like dukes of hazard cut a car What was it a bit smoking a bandit car? He bought he does stuff, but here's this guy. He's how cool he is He got it when the rider strike was going on He gets a job at Burger King right and he works there for a while and he gives away He wants to give away $50,000 and he gives it to one of the the janitor girls there Just to be well, I mean you could tell the story better. It's but I mean he's that that's a really good story. Tell it, please That was basically can you punch that up? Wait, wait, so you work at a fucking hamburger place? Why Burger King during?
Starting point is 00:35:27 Why because because for a while a joke? Well, not really a joke for a while I wanted to try to work at different minimum wage jobs and write a book about it Oh, that's just like move from job to job and then like it was 10 grand So at the end of each job, I would give somebody 10 grand and move to the next job But I but I was always working right. I was always working on TV shows so I couldn't do it, but then when the strike came I gave it a shot did it at Burger King and nice You know, I never wrote the book, but I did the experience
Starting point is 00:35:53 What about and then he so he would when he was riding yester or what's the one was it? He would go away to these cabins to write for the weekend. Am I boring you by no, I like it. This is me. What do you mean? No, you're good. Um You are boring me. Yeah And he well I'm talking about him that's why He would go away and he would write these in the guest book He would say he would and you have to tell this better, obviously But he'd write this long like I love staying here
Starting point is 00:36:17 But you know my twin brother came and he cut one of my testicles off like this Crazy story and then the next person come and read the other thing Explain it a little better. Yeah, that was pretty much it and then I turn into Then I turn into a tv show. We did it as a show on tv Yes, well the guest books the guest book So we do is a different anthology every week Right, but give a good example of one of the stories that you would leave behind Oh, you do stuff like yeah, two guys got into a fight and then they talked about the fight
Starting point is 00:36:41 And then one of them took a fork and stuck the other guy in the eye But they put the fork back in the drawer. So be careful with the forks. Maybe you want to watch Just a freak just a freak that that's really good. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let me ask you something So you have this amazon thing going. Yeah, right. So you can only show run one show at a time Yeah, I've had two shows on there at the same time, but it's I like to just have one show right Yeah, so if you because I end up direct because I write them all direct them all the whole thing Right, but the one I just want to ask you something. You're gonna beg Greg now for your other project I knew it
Starting point is 00:37:09 No, I'm not begging Hey, you know, he would take this thunder away from both of us who Greg You guys have a show you brought up the stories. I think enough condensed condensed milk, you know, you can only have so much Right. So what you're saying is that you can't take on anything else. He's not doing anything now right now. No You can take your show. Okay. Yeah, I'm waiting to see if we're gonna do a second season of but if you don't you get your open Uh, yes. Okay. Good. It's good to know. Yeah, I want to see who's on like, you know, you know how teams trade away They have contracts. I don't know anything about free agent. He's a free agent. That's what I meant That's what I'm speaking of free agents. Is there water here or like a
Starting point is 00:37:44 Yeah, get water, dude. Yeah, I love what gave me one. No, that's all right there Is there a red? Is it a red bull? Is it what you want flow or you want that? What has caffeine? Oh, you get them a caffeine. Do you mind if you just tell me where it is? No, no, we'll get it Bobby are you sober now? Yeah, I'm sober again. Yeah, me too. No, no, no seven years. Oh, that's fucking now Do you but that's the difference in you? I want to say I'm not I'm not being shitty here I'm not I'm not it's not a whole thing about sobriety. I mean, but I you know in the past when I'm are you crying? Yeah In the past he might be crying
Starting point is 00:38:16 Do you need a hug? No, okay good. Um, get him something in the past I always find you so funny and so talented But I don't know if you remember but I would say hi or talk to you and you was kind of I don't you know, like you know, like a little maybe that's weird. That's yeah, we're aloof Just like um kind of like a soundtrack lights are on but no one's home. You're not in connecting with you You were difficult to connect with but I think that's more of an ADHD thing. He's he's started meds not too long ago And it's been no kind of a game changer. What are you on? uh riddling
Starting point is 00:38:47 But but you're really A little bit of a different person. We didn't spend much time. I don't do you remember meeting me or ever a thousand times Yeah, but but you but I think you've got a twist. It's a compliment. It's a compliment and bonjour But my point is this I don't know what that means Touche I meant Touche and but tour Yeah, yeah, yeah So what I'm saying to you is so high. Yeah, I know this guy John the lakalom coffee is delicious. It's got a foamy thing. Really good. It's got a foamy thing. Do you want?
Starting point is 00:39:17 Yeah, yeah, thank you. Yeah, yeah No, no, this is fun. Is there one right there? Yeah. Oh there you got one. That's very nice. I'm sorry I love it. What were you saying Bobby? Oh, what I'm saying is is that when on this is This is what I'm being better at. Okay, it's when I see this is kind of sounds so fucking gross But when I see people that I recognize from Hollywood or in shows, I just automatically kind of get intimidated Right and this is back then right and I don't know what happened
Starting point is 00:39:46 But in the last three or four three years, it's shifted for me and I feel like I belong That's good, right? So it's like now I can like lock eyes with like Rachel Bielsen and give her a hug and like be human about it But before I I just brought baggage and all this Weird perceptions with me to relate Rachel Bielsen. Why would that? Why would you use that name? Because I just saw her. Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah, like I hung out with her You know, I mean, did you go out with her? No, I just went to her house and I did her podcast But we hung out a little bit Some of that is the comic thing right when you're a comic you just feel a little different
Starting point is 00:40:17 That's what I mean that you do you do you understand what I'm saying? I know exactly and now because of podcasting And now that our worlds are opening up now We're getting introduced with two rock stars because we've had some rock stars on the show And other actors and now I'm booking stuff. That's like high level Stuff with other stars and I feel like oh, we're we're I'm a part of it and I feel the same But for many years I didn't feel that way Right. I felt like I was this dirty comic from the comedy store That told dick jokes and it was a self-esteem thing, but I think that's what you were reading John
Starting point is 00:40:45 But also, but no, no, but I don't see it. I mean that was a serious beautiful, you know, you know Self-realization. You know what? I just realized your eyebrows. Yeah, Harry. Pretty good. Thanks. Um Uh, did you always know you were good-looking? That's a word. I mean, that's uh, I wasn't I mean, I wasn't when I was you know, everybody says oh, I was an awkward thing, but um No That makes it but you don't think of that You know, and then now people say it or something. I'm old. I guess my question is do good-looking people realize how good-looking they are Well, do you do you?
Starting point is 00:41:19 Yeah, see we both. Yeah, I realize you're good-looking. No, not at all. I realize I am all the time I just know it. No, you have the same energy thing that I have You literally have the energy thing there. Ouch. I'm gonna be honest with you, dude When it comes to Greek dudes and I've googled it, right? You're not good What do you mean? In terms of looks but your personality has the same as I do right and so when you said that about me I was being defensive. But what I'm saying is that I relate to it. We are brothers. We're all guys Have you always gone attractive women?
Starting point is 00:41:47 Like you are Even his girlfriend before me were Stunning really. Yeah, I bet. Yeah, but you know, I know that I have to bring that extra thing to the table Yeah, I gotta bring it. We gotta bring it all the time. But let me say something. Yeah Without the rejection of society and the rejection of women earlier on in my life I would have had no motivation right to work on that aspect of my personality Right, right and to walk through fear to do stand up because when I was 23 years old That was the scariest thing to even consider doing. I was living in San Diego. No money. You're me
Starting point is 00:42:24 I signed up to this open. I was trembling, right? I walked up. That was jittery But without the rejections like I gotta get pussy, right, right? That was what I was money. I have no money, right? So that's what it was right my bad. I had a little emotional The first time I felt it. I felt it. Thank you. Thank you. There was some girl early on when I was kind of just I think transitioning from a You know a caterpillar to a butter. I was not I was a gawky weird kid and Some girl said that she wanted she thought I was cute wanted to go out with me and she was the hottest girl
Starting point is 00:42:54 And so I was at this block with this block party You know, I was at like the shitty house and the cool guys just weren't at the other houses And I just started telling her oh so and so what's going on? Me so and so and it traveled down a few houses to her boyfriend He was out at the cool button, you know football. Yeah, and he comes and knocks on the window and I said, yeah, I rolled on the one Boom punches me in the face. Oh No terrible and it was so You know horrifically
Starting point is 00:43:16 You know, it just made it was so I was so embarrassed and so hurt It was back before you could say bullies and hey, I'm being you know counselors were it must have been traumatic traumatic And I and I was like and and he wanted to beat me up for the longest time I was afraid at school all the time and I looked in the rear. I said, you know what I got I got to take care of this I got to do the right thing I got to become famous so I could get bodyguards to beat him up And every milestone that I got a general hospital guy and I'm mother fuck. I'm gonna invite him to a beach boy show But I'm gonna beat his ass behind them hold him down and give him a buck
Starting point is 00:43:46 And and and you know, I finally got over it But you know someday I want to go to the whatever bathroom. He's cleaning and say thank you Really, but you know, that's so funny. It's like I've talked to a lot of people in entertainment And it is that like I'll show you You know, right? It's like It's that fuel and that yeah hate is an underestimated emotion. I love it. Yeah, it's fine line It really motivates you. But yeah, it turns you into rocky getting stronger We're doing like we know we know the theme song. I wanted to act it out. I know, but it's ridiculous
Starting point is 00:44:19 You're right. I think people are afraid to feel two things which is getting stronger And then people are afraid to feel anxiety or fear or hatred, but I think all of them are equally as useful as all the Once it's like no, that's directing you where you need to. Can we take the collars now? There's no color. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah This is not corolla. Yeah, it's not like Yeah, but my point that also but but we would never We would never behave even if I had the power to get revenge on somebody that treated me like shit 30 years ago It would never do it. Right. Right because once you achieve the success you kind of forget about it. It's not that I won Yeah, you won to me. Right. I did it, right and
Starting point is 00:45:00 And you know what those bullies and the people that picked on me there was this guy named art in high school You went to school in San Diego. You grew up in San Diego. Yeah, and the people would just walk out to me Hey, goo can punch me in the face. You know, man. Yeah, and you'd be like, whoa, right? And they would tell me that's a response or That's terrible. Yeah. Yeah, and this Nowadays to this Asian hate is coming back and it's horrific. I can't think of like someone beating my mother-in-law or something Yeah, I it's terrible. Why are you laughing? I'm not my um, why you tell john why you hate the stop Asian hate
Starting point is 00:45:32 Movement, I think I've go ahead. Well Why do you bring that up? I think it's so funny. All right But I don't I don't I like the movement Right, but the reason why I didn't like it because it doesn't it motivates them to learn karate I Take away the hate very good. What's gonna get them fighting? Yeah, it's because when at the height of Of the movement, right all my Asian actor friends, right and comedians were being asked to do public service announcements And they never would reach out to me. Oh, that's why I want I want no
Starting point is 00:46:07 But honestly, no, I want to be on with george decay, right, right? Hello. I'm oh my Hey, you know, all right. Oh my Japanese and term and cancer whatever and then we go. Hi. I'm bobby You shouldn't you know do that what you're doing or whatever, but they never asked me because they don't think that I have You know a car. I got back a car Or whatever, right? And so when they don't ask me to the PSA I I turned against the movement Us greeks are asking you to do stop greek hate. Yeah. Yeah. Stop greek. Yes. So when there's a greek thing I'll let me do it. Yes. We will let you in. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, but honestly does and I you know, I Did did that work does that work?
Starting point is 00:46:48 Does that gonna stop like is that a was that a were the any of these kind of I think it helps a little right, but I don't think that um, you know, I don't want to dive because we're not a political podcast But I don't think that anything change moves the meter if you're one way politically, right? What are you can yours? What all hollywood has to do go tell us make a compilation video right now Garcia of people going Putin Stop it Stop it right now
Starting point is 00:47:16 You think so and it always does climate change. It always works. That's all it takes Climate change wait, we haven't stopped that. I'm being sarcastic again sarcastic again I don't your new york greek sarcasm. I don't I think just namo's here is throwing you off I think because I'm locked into him. You're locked in. That's what he does Because usually you and I are locked in or you're so not connected. I mean like when he's here I just feel invisible. Are your audience is the audience going to like this? They're gonna love it. This is one of the best ones we've done. I want an honest
Starting point is 00:47:46 I want an honest answer from you. Yeah, honest answer from you and from you Because I know you've been a little bit more favorable about my looks than he has. Yeah, when I sit with stamos Do I hold up at all? Yeah, I'll say this. Yes I think what works for you is the contrast if you look christ What's the thing you do about it's the worst thing you could do? No, no, no, you'd rather you'd be honest. You'd rather be so We weird looking enough to be memorable than to be kind of a mid because a mid next to him I'd forget about you. Right. Okay. So that I'm very weird looking
Starting point is 00:48:20 It it brings out how weird I am looking. Yeah The contrast and I like that so it's like next to him. I will remember you I could pick you out from a lineup Because I'm awkward and freakish looking. He makes you look that way Like my eyes just converge more into the center of my face Right, like for instance, like I have eyes that are kind of closer set to you If I sat next to someone like brandy, right with you know farther set eyes, you would remember me No, you'd both just still look hot. So this is sort of a this is um Uh, uh, never mind
Starting point is 00:48:56 But what I was gonna. Oh, yeah, go ahead. I'm sorry. It's your pockets. No, it's not mine. It's fine I just I wanted to add on to that. I like you raised your hands very polite because I want to be kind about it Yeah, I wanted to really be real about it. And and and the thing is is like So a couple weeks ago. I was in um, New York City and you didn't text me or call me or anything You're right, we've done a lot of hours of conversation connecting I even texted you once and I even texted like I hope you're all right. I hope things are good and it was just like Radio, so well, maybe things weren't which I don't mind. Yeah, right. Yeah, I don't mind. I'm not a big Let me defend myself real quick. Yeah, um when I was in New York the last time, right? Yeah, I did go
Starting point is 00:49:36 Do are you garbage with those two guys, right? Those weird-looking guys, right? You like them? They're cute cat guy, right? They're great, but that was the only comics I saw there because I was just kind of working on Sex in the City and then I You know, I made that early call time. So that's why could we hang out you think I would love the next time in January I go and I'll hang out with you. Would you be sure to go? We would have a good time. Can I go to my story though? Can I be part of the hang? Yeah, if you're in New York, yeah from 100% I'm there December. Are you gonna be there in December? No, I said January I'm playing it. Tell him where I'm playing it. Carnegie Hall with the Beach Boys. Oh, you really?
Starting point is 00:50:06 December 5th. Wait, wait, you're playing with the Beach Boys? He tours with them for the last 20 years. Amazing. Yeah, we have to go through this Can I go back to the so anyway, um, I'm walking down the street and um, I think the story is way too late I think the timing is wrong. No, don't worry. Yeah, go for it. So I eat at this restaurant with this Korean girl, right? Right. It's just a friend. It wasn't a date and and next to it was like this french bakery, right? And we walked in there and it was like these Beautiful there were $30 a piece like like like a like a little cake or whatever, right? So, um, this is way too long, but I'm gonna try this. You're that you're that cake and your winchels donuts. I
Starting point is 00:50:49 Love I should have done that 20 minutes. I should have done that 20 minutes ago. It doesn't work. It's still work Yeah, yeah, I love both. Yes, I'll eat a winchels, right, but that's what it is, right? Right, right. Stay away from politics on here because it's I do too. I don't ever talk about it for the most part I mean people know but I I don't you could tell he doesn't look like a guy who knows much about what's going on I do that's That makes me so angry. Well, here's we have our honest hats. I know you just called me a windshield donut That's true. That's true. That's my bad. That's my bad trash food. No, that's a trash Okay, right. Okay, the homeless person of four winchels. Yes, they they can yeah
Starting point is 00:51:24 Yeah, it's trash but my point is this what I'm saying is is that like during the midterm elections Yes, there's a couple races that I follow and I root for certain people like the whole carry lake You know one, you know, I mean I was following that one clapped closely Yeah, you know, I mean the Herschel Walker and uh war knock race. I was looking at so I mean I know, you know, you mean that is true. You did text me on that one time and said you did love herschel walker and you Wanted Right, right. You said that's true. That's what I guys went to school together. Yeah. Yeah. Love his stance Do I have it's right on reproductive reproduction? Yeah
Starting point is 00:51:56 So my point is is that so in that way I follow things but um, I don't know like Legislations or I don't know some of the laws specifically, right? I took us down the wrong road. Let's go. No, no, no It's fine. I like to go this one. That's what I like about you. You don't reinforce asian stereotypes, right? What do you mean? You're not smart My wife is smart my mother-in-law Fucking tears. You know what? You know, you know, uh, you get my fucking blood boilers There see a backup you You really get my blood boiling good. All right. We have a good time. We have a good time, right?
Starting point is 00:52:29 But I have to re-re-re-re-re Reiterate this. Okay. It took me a while. Yeah when I get emotional, right? The Jew Ari Shafir came on here. Yeah told me I was dumb, right? And then you're saying that I'm dumb and you're right There are certain things that I don't know about right but instinctually, right and artistically, right? I feel like I know what I'm doing. You do. All right. You do Bobby. Can I say this go John? I was uh, another relationship. I've had a lot of heartbreak and you. Yes Honestly, that's me. You wish you you women have broken up with you, John So a lot and I wouldn't have cheated on me, but one one very important relationship. Um, when we broke up
Starting point is 00:53:03 She said I was stupid. I wasn't smart enough for her or her friends Like how you maybe how you you were just saying and it to this I mean I got over it, but it's it was it was crushing so so crushing. Yeah. Yeah, and and But you I am smart you are we're street smart You know these people that rattle off facts like him. It's memory. It's not intelligence. He's got a good memory Yeah, yeah, am I right? I say I go ahead. You know what? I feel we all fall into this category and somewhat I once said something to a guy who was much smarter and I said I said, yeah, you know what? I'm stupid I'm stupid and he looked at me and he goes Greg. You're not stupid. You just were never educated properly
Starting point is 00:53:42 That's what you call with that. Yeah backhanded compliment. Yeah. Yeah, that's backhanded. Yeah, that's that means I would have shot that guy That means stupid. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but that was Herschel Walker Yeah, but there are things that I love that I know a lot about like what like the next generation I know that's stupid. What's that? Star Trek star Trek next generation. What age are you gonna go like, okay? I'm gonna stop being into children stuff That's not children You're gonna make me so fine. You're gonna make me so fucking much. I bet you I'm not this honest question. Fuck you. Let me say something Season five. Do I get a shirt? Do I get a second to the last episode? Yeah, right? There was an episode
Starting point is 00:54:17 It's called the inner light. Yeah, right. What's that episode? I I want and and and tell me that that's not good sci-fi. Okay. I'll watch it. All right. Good. Thank you You love sci-fi. Have you always grown up loving sci-fi and uh, yeah, I love sci-fi. Did you collect these? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah This is my house. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you play Yeah, these are all my things. Yeah, I've always been a child because um my what? You play video games. No, I've never not and I'm not into sci-fi, but I do collect stuff like disney stuff I have a bunch of disney stuff. Why? Well, like what he's got dolls in his fucking garage. I got a dumbbell worth like $800,000. Oh, all right. My bad. My bad
Starting point is 00:54:55 I thought we could you know connect on that but we could we you know, this is what I learned about when I became friends with John Stamos. Yeah He you wouldn't expect him to also be like a great nice guy On top of all the other things he has. It's not fair. Well, that's enough for me. He's also a musical No, he's a great actor. He's got comedic time and he's funny and then like he fucking is a musician Yeah, I mean does how wet can a pussy get? Yeah. Yeah. I mean like seriously. Yeah, mine's too. Yeah. Yeah I mean he could he fucking play like he could play drum fucking guitar. It's like too much and then the face It's too much. Yeah, you um
Starting point is 00:55:29 When did you start pulling the wiener out? What was that about? Because I fucking love it. I love it. I love what I love your energy right now and thank you so much for coming But you know what? I love to answer that. I love to answer that I love comics. I love you guys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I swear to God. I do that's the thing that Sagan had the problem with What he would always say are you gonna get naked or whatever? He would always say that right? Yeah, and to badger me And I'll tell you this mr. Stamos. You call me. No, I'm gonna call you. I'm not gonna call you john right? I'm calling mr. Stamos. No, that's not cool. All right, miss john. Yeah, all right So what I'm gonna say this is that you know, I I did it right because I was ashamed of my body
Starting point is 00:56:04 Yeah, and then by exposing myself to large groups of people. I got comfortable with who I was Right because yeah, go ahead. I also think if you zoom out a bit He is the most important Asian to ever exist in this industry because he came out during a time when Asians were supposed to look one way and he came out dick of swinging And what about the guy from hangover? That was way. I did that way before way before I did way that before he stole that from me dick of swinging a little bit of a little dick thing Let's say it was in the little dick. He stole that dick out. Yeah
Starting point is 00:56:39 And my dick is Tell him about my dick. Oh my god. Yeah, dr. Ken. John. His dick was on the movie, right? Tell him about my dick. Tell him right now. Oh, he for sure has a bigger dick. Thank you. Well, I mean so does So does a squirrel I mean, he didn't have a dick I mean, I didn't see a dick there How it's not when you see the squirrel. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, right. Yeah. Yeah. It's the size of the ocean Whatever they say, but my saying is this is the size of the ocean. I don't know. What's the terminology?
Starting point is 00:57:05 It's the motion of the motion of the ocean The motion of the hooker Do you um, is it hard to find funny beautiful women? That must be tough to like it is hard. You got a lot of beautiful girls on this on this switch thing and that stuff But yeah tinge, but how but to find a Funny Yeah, yeah, but to find a funny pretty girl up that is that important to you it is important and um, John what i'm saying is you know if there's a loss
Starting point is 00:57:33 There's a huge loss of breaking up with her, right? I'm sorry and these are things that I reflect still today I think back and I go wow, what a huge. I mean, this is a great woman that we're no longer together I just instinctually believe that I think we're better off married right now apart Is that I could still love her? I don't want to have resentments toward her And I want to have her in my life for the rest of my life Like when she dies, right Which I hope I never have here. Yes. Why because I'm old Yeah, but just in case something happens, you get a horrific car accident
Starting point is 00:58:04 And you're you're in and you're at the you know hospice. Yeah set it up and get a call right and they're like She's in the hospital. She's a horrific heart, right? Yeah, I will be I will cancel anything on planet earth Well, of course you will wait like oh, I'm gonna cancel. I won't go to his I won't go to him. But wait a minute. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He's gonna die alone guys crew crew Is there any shot of them getting back together? Oh my god, what are we doing here? What are what's going on? Let's do a game. What are we gonna do? Wait? No, so let's let's play a game I'll let that That welcome to the game show
Starting point is 00:58:34 Right, so raise your hand I'm gonna go if you think My music rising up into the night. No, you know take my time take my chance All right, good. Andreas. Go ahead. What's a question? If you raise your hand if you think we're gonna get back together and then not don't raise your hand if you Very good, George No, wait, wait, wait, raise your hand if they think you're gonna get back together. Yes. Okay. All right. So Andreas zero No, it's not a chance. Yeah, not a chance. I hope so But do you raise your hand?
Starting point is 00:59:05 Okay, good one This is radio two go ahead. No three. No No, well, we don't oh, oh, yeah John good. Oh I didn't know what that about you. I hope they're yeah. Yeah, it's you know, what's funny I feel like because we started this podcast together and we're still doing it that there is a drama Like people do want us to do it through their own I think it validates them in their relationship or whatever, but it's like
Starting point is 00:59:32 At this point, we want to teach people that you can still Break up and not have this fucking tension and fighting and resentment and anger and all that stuff I just really like him. Yeah, I like him. I like her. I like him. I like her too. I'm sorry. I like I don't know beautiful vagina Thank you. I really do have a beautiful. She's a great vagina like one of the best like Like if they sold the vagina at that book or that french bakery. I went to new york It would like be at the last thing I'm the my vaginas and john stamos Yeah, yeah, yeah of a giant like he would go like her vagina and then your dick. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, but like hers
Starting point is 01:00:07 It's a very good, but I don't know so many of your fans at home now like They just keep rewinding Like I just I'm sorry. I don't I don't know the he just told me you guys broke up and stuff. Yeah, and I'm just kind of Asking Question for you, Bobby. Yeah, go ahead. No, I mean Well, you were a super high profile relationship for a really long time. Oh, was that like splitting up my first marriage Yeah, or paul abdull Your first the one the x-men. Yeah, this geek that was
Starting point is 01:00:40 debilitating too. It was yeah, so it must have been hard. Yeah, because Well, you know, we were well at the same time But but you know, I had a you know in my mind a trajectory where I was to go But thank god, you know, you it's you know, if you believe in like the best things happen or whatever You know, because now I have the most beautiful wife and beautiful child. I'm a four and a half year old boy named billy I just love him so much. I wouldn't have any of that if I was you know The best things come from the worst things I think he's asian Yeah, I'm half irish and half greek. My wife is half irish and half filipino. Right. He's like, you know,
Starting point is 01:01:15 He looks irish. Oh really half irish right and and quarter quarter But still see down the side. There's some asian. Yeah for sure. Yeah. Yeah, and the right kind of asian Yeah, the right kind jungle asian. Wait, is there a wrong type of a yeah? Yeah. What's with the wrong? What is it? Oh, korean? Come on. Now that's right. Yeah, I love korean But we're wrong. No, that's my question. My question is this now You're what 60. How old are you? 51 51 that's not you did. Okay. I'm sorry that kind of humor. No, it wasn't I'm just I just want to say I don't know what you're doing. But like, you know, man, 50 you're norton. You're not norton. You're you
Starting point is 01:01:47 Okay, so you're 50 you've gone through you had a big breakup long relationship. Do you come back home now? Does bobby lee end up with a korean? Oh, yeah, no, no, I'm doing white You don't you don't end up coming home always gonna go white. I love white. Have you ever thought about I'm talking sneakers. I'm from poway. No, he's gonna go for middle america white like yeah Like yeah, yeah, yeah lightly bigoted white like I swear to you. That's where he's going. You don't like korean women They're beautiful Um, they don't like me Right, you know the ones that like me are the ones that I don't want to be with and the ones that I like
Starting point is 01:02:25 You know, I mean don't want to be with me, right? They're more they want the um the engineer right right and they don't I'm dirty Right, I shave my pubes. You're dangerous though. The hot chicks love danger. Yeah. Yeah. I'm very dangerous. I spit, you know, man Yeah, hard right. I spit is your comment. Has your standup not in the vagina, but you like I would say it's probably harder for a korean girl to bring home this type of korean to her family rather than a white guy Well, any would be weird to take you home Right, any girl take my family. Oh, they did What did you do about it? Yeah, love like obsessed with him. Yeah, no because I'm respectful. Yeah But but but I just stand up changed since you cleaned up a little bit
Starting point is 01:03:08 Yeah, I mean, I don't pull my dick out anymore if that's what you're saying Did she stop it? She said no more dick pulling. No, the culture did. Yeah, right. Well, you can't do it. You can't do it anymore Right. I mean, you know the culture has changed and I've gone with the times There's I can't like, you know, usually I like will poke, you know, I mean I do it in the belly. You know what I mean? You can't do that anymore. There's just certain things You just can't do so. How about this? I mean, I know it's a topic But how do you guys feel about all this all this censorship and comedy like how do you get I don't know? You don't feel it live though. Do you feel it live? I don't feel what here's what yeah
Starting point is 01:03:37 I don't feel it live and also it's number two and I don't want to bring up names But there are certain people that that are in our field. You know what I mean? And hell But they're just that wasn't me Dave Yeah, they're just certain people in our field and they've tested the waters right to see what the climate's like see what exactly happened I mean, we've no we know dudes that were like fully canceled But then you see them have a career and still make money and income So we're seeing what what works and what doesn't it's not that I am I'm always supportive of victims if somebody you know Is assaulted or whatever and that's and I'll always be like that
Starting point is 01:04:13 But I'm just saying that just from an outside viewer. I'm you know, I don't think cancelled Is what we think we thought that meant right? It just means you won't get like a show you won't that's a thing is that sure But now you guys have podcasts and you make millions of dollars without these but let me tell you john john I know some dudes that are completely cancelled out of Hollywood that even though they make millions of dollars a year on the road And on their podcast their heart is broken because they'll never be in a movie Or have that opportunity because I'm still I came to LA and I love the fact that like I love auditioning for something And then maybe I'll get it and then when you do get it you're so excited
Starting point is 01:04:49 I just love that thrill and then you know I love acting you know I mean, so it's like you could act it too. Thank you buddy. And so, you know, that's gone for people that are cancelled I I maybe hollywood change. I don't know probably not. No, probably not But in your but just stand up. Have you guys had to curtail anything? I mean you I don't feel it at all I'm telling you like I it's when you perform live you I feel it like zero the audience kind of had to take one joke out I took well, I here's if it's my show. Yeah, and it's my fans Yeah, so it's like bobby lee doing and then I can do what I want
Starting point is 01:05:21 But at the comedy store and all these clubs that are like more showcase clubs Where like the mix of people are different like we are here for nicky glazier or whatever I kind of stick to a certain thing because it's not going to like can girls get away with stuff more than you guys can Can they take their dick out? Is that what you're asking clit? No, but no, but like any letterman sometimes back in the day would pull out a titty. Maybe I don't think she can do I don't mean exposing yourself But like just their jokes seem to be they could get away with a little more Or do you think you're really getting into a topic we've never even talked about? Yeah, finally the show gets good. It's really interesting
Starting point is 01:05:54 I seven years No, I don't think girls can get away with shit. Yeah, but I mean, what do you mean? What do you mean? I well, you just talk about nicky glazier. She she goes. Yeah, she goes. Yeah, I watched um Eliza God her last special was so fucking great. I Right. Yeah, and I never I should do it more but like I texted her You know dm what thing just just because people I was just so taken by it It was so smart and so cutting-edge, but yet it was you know, and she put men, you know in their place
Starting point is 01:06:25 Some men the needed to be put in the place the way she did it was so smart. I really really admired her Yeah, I mean I I think that to answer a question I think there are a lot of strong women doing it and there are a lot of women that I look at and I you know I'm gonna say I don't want to be sexist but we'll cut it out But I want to say something that's kind of real they have smaller brains GarcĂ­a, why would you say that? That's not cool So the standard's different. It's like when you play basketball, right? The ball's a little small. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Everything's just a little Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Is that girl's basketball? Yeah, girl's basketball is the next player coach. I watch the NBA for like three minutes
Starting point is 01:07:04 It's so I can feel better about yeah. Yeah. Yeah No, you know that I have a hit television show where I play a basketball coach and I didn't even know what the fuck Smaller ball. Yeah, they play and I play a good and I play a boy. I have this show that David Kelly show Yeah, what was that called? I think I see a big shot. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and I'm gonna play a coach who's a college coach And I took it on to me. I shouldn't but well anyway, and I get I throw a chair and I get kicked out of the NCAA And I have to coach girls at all private Girl school in Laguna. Oh, yeah, and that's the other thing watch that. What's it on? Disney plus Disney plus check it out. But um
Starting point is 01:07:38 So I go back to bad girls being smarter. Yeah, there it is big shot. Disney. Look at you. Yeah, he's he's actually really good in it Dude, he's a great actor. I've never he is a great actor. Is that a painting? Yeah, that's a painting. Yeah. Yeah, I'm sorry. I but what I'm saying is is that that looks that looks good I honestly will look at lineups now And and look at female, you know women that who happen to be women That where I'll be scared to follow them almost Yeah, like I was in New York. I was yamanita. Oh, she's great. Yeah. Well, then why'd you make that face? Because I'm just Just one I want everything to be said you're scared
Starting point is 01:08:16 Dude, I Dude, I was I wasn't fucking New York right and she put me up You can follow anyone you can I know but she put me up after yamanica every show, right? And she would destroy the room. Yeah. She's a beast. Yeah, right? And I would just be like what the fuck and it's it's like that's a good thing. That's all There's a lot of funny women. Yeah. Killers. There's a lot of killers. It's great. Yeah, and I love to see that He loves female comics He's dead. Yeah. Yeah. I want to say this though before we end. Is it over?
Starting point is 01:08:48 Yeah, I'm gonna end really I already podcasted earlier today. I'm fucking tired. Does it not feel long enough? These things do go really fast. Yeah, because we had a good time. That means we had a good time That's why did you want to promote something? Yeah, my special good watch mom love. It's really good mom love mom love on what on youtube on youtube give us a look give us a Look at my podcast long days. Yeah. Yeah big shots. Yeah, I have that and um, well, there's some good shows coming up in New York Carnegie Hall and then Huntington is everything. Yeah somewhere else Syracuse. We're doing a beautiful beach the Christmas show orchestra Wow, which was had a lot of really good Christmas songs to little st. Nick
Starting point is 01:09:23 And pet sounds is one of my favorite albums of all time. Beautiful. What a beautiful album. I mean other Yes, what's your favorite song in there? God only knows is there's very few perfect songs. Yeah, something is perfect perfect Beatles God only knows is perfect. That's a great. I started playing with him in 85 as one of the first few shows. Oh, shit Long time. Let me let you think since you brought something in the Beatles, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah Are you a musician? Do you play any music? I play piano. Are you do but yeah, I play piano So, um, let me ask you I should know if I met a girl on hinge, which is to happen Hey, she doesn't she hates the Beatles. Oh, that seemed like a red flag. Yeah. Is that a red flag for sure?
Starting point is 01:09:59 What are some red flags for you if you were to meet a woman today? So you were single not married big dick Yeah, that's yeah, that's why I'm mine too. That's not mine too. Yeah. No, I'm I'm not that's fine What big I feel like you would be like high on you would be very discerning. Yeah, I'm with it I'm like, all right, but he would have to have a beautiful face. Huh? Yeah, good. She would have to see what I mean She would have my back. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She'd have to have a beautiful face and nice brass That doesn't bother me at all. I for sure you would. Yeah, why like why sure? I don't know. I just like a lot I come from a country where Um, the trans women are fucking. Yeah, gorgeous. Okay. I've jerked off to some things
Starting point is 01:10:38 But anyway, my point is is this all you got to do is just pretend like your dick is so big that it popped through the other side And that makes it okay. I don't get it. Um, yeah, either you don't get it. No, I don't either you guys got it Yeah, they got it. You like the Beatles? Of course. Yeah. Yeah, but pet sounds, you know, they are What does the philipino have to do with the Beatles? That's our number one karaoke go-to like all of you guys say karaoke Yeah, lie. Yeah, I don't like right gil So would this be a red flag like would this be a red flag? Let it pee I voted for trump twice. Wow. Is that a red flag? You're not allowed to vote twice, you know
Starting point is 01:11:13 That didn't want election but like in 2016 2020 Is that a red flag? Yeah to you. Yeah, that sounds good to me, brother Me too, man. Yeah. Hey, is there like a there should be like a secret hand signal? Yeah No, I I'm not a fan of trump. Yeah. Yeah, but the Beatles was a little because you know, I it's they it's If you don't like the Beatles, right? You don't like music or sounds, right? Who doesn't like the beat? No, I've met a couple of people. I was driving recently my kid is four four and a half I said he was in the back and the Kokomo comes on the radio. Oh, I play I said, isn't it cool that daddy played on this? I swore to God and he goes dad takes the longest beat. Do you know the Beatles?
Starting point is 01:11:54 He care about the beach boys. No, he does now. Yeah, he likes the Beatles too. Wow, the beach boys are great, dude They're great. You can remember sometimes I'll call him later. I shouldn't be doing this on stage Face time. I'm in the middle of a show. No, it was the best me and my it was the best He he was on stage massive crowd. Yeah, he faced time me and my wife were just sitting in the room and he put the phone Like so I could see the show from behind. Yeah, and we just sat and we watched the fucking concert It was very wow. Yeah, it was very fucking amazing. Yeah Yeah, he had my wife go up on stage and sing backup in vegas. No Yeah, it was her dream. That was her dream. That was fucking amazing. We have guys come to a concert sometime
Starting point is 01:12:28 Wait a second. Are you one of your fucking mind? I'm not going to go on about it. No, no, no. I'm Bob Iran. We bring all our friends up and get to sing and play. Oh, I would love to do that I would love it. It would be a dream. Yeah, what are you talking? Have you done it? No, I'll be too scared to do it I'll be too scared. But you're going to. This is what you need to do though. Yeah, and you gotta do this as a friend, right? Call me too Okay, right and you gotta bite me out. Let's do it. You gotta go. Hey, John's doing a Hermosa or whatever, right? Let's go and go What do you do? You're basically saying the only way you'll hang out with me is if Stamos is there It'll be more fun
Starting point is 01:13:00 That's kind of what you said without saying it Yeah, that's what I said Yeah, that's it. You gotta come in. I get it. I listen and I get an extra incentive for me to do it I get it and I hear you alone. What do we do? I appreciate the honesty because we get it all out here We get it all out here. Yeah, but what are we gonna do? I don't know. Have all dinner, right? Right. Yeah, yeah Can we I'm not I'm being 100 sirs. Can we be friends, Bobby? Yes 100 honestly 100 I love these. I love you. Yeah, so what so what level of friendship?
Starting point is 01:13:29 Like let me I'm gonna I'm gonna put it out there after the show's done. Yeah, would I get your number right do it right now? Can we bleep it out? No, we'll do it after the works, but I'll get it there. Can I ask over one question? No, okay, go ahead Go ahead. Well, I just thought it was very cool how you put their show up on the thing Do you not know how to spell sprung? S-P-R-U-N-G So Garcia There you go
Starting point is 01:13:57 But bang sprung sprung on free free. Wow Free be so listen Garcia created the show he wrote every episode he directed every episode and this freebie just started I have a show coming on here, too And he is this is the number one show on freebie at the original sitcom. It's doubling numbers on every other They're begging him to do another season. They're begging him to do a deal there at freebie That's amazing. There you go. Check it out. Every one of his shows you never not had a show go, right? Every one of your shows have been picked up. Uh, I shot one pilot that didn't go. Let me ask you something. Yes Is now you've been in the game because you did my name is Earl, right?
Starting point is 01:14:33 Yes, started with Anthony Clark way back. Yes, I love Anthony. I've talked to him recently. Yeah, he's doing good We're he needs to come out. Can we get Anthony on here? But he just stays home. He will not leave the house But he'll just call me and just launch into what are you wearing? You know What you know, how's your gay son? Yeah, he's a guy That I just don't like he just what is it is? He's a what's it the you know, there's a gore forward a gore forward. He stays home a lot. He lives in agora. Yeah Tom's yeah, but he's hilarious. He's still hilarious. So now but you know now the climate has changed because even when me and Theo sold our show to fox
Starting point is 01:15:07 yeah, uh The it's like it's a completely different from before structure now from before right? It's far less money Right and how do you navigate that? Is that weird for you or no? I haven't been doing network stuff for a while So I did this show on tbs, which was a little bit cable And then I did this on the streaming and I don't know if I'm going back to network at all But the streaming was great budget was great. They left me alone. Let me do whatever I wanted. It was fantastic Oh, that's fantastic. Yeah So give watch sprung. Yeah, you gotta check it out honestly this was a pleasant surprise
Starting point is 01:15:43 This was a fun. I'm so happy to see you. You liked stuff like that. Yeah, you love did they tell you They didn't tell you no. Did you guys know already? Yeah, they knew. Why didn't you tell me? I didn't know it You didn't know no, so when he walked in what you think she thought I was Pete Sampras Said that. Yeah. Yeah. That was amazing. Yeah, you um bobby and and now you I'm I'm super fans And I'm a fan of both of you guys. Thank you so much. I really this has been really nice and thank you for letting me sit in Thank you for being my friend. I loved you. He thought you were funny. That's the highest compliment that bob could give you know, I um during um
Starting point is 01:16:17 The comedy story anniversary. I saw saggots wife and his kids at there Yeah, and I just sat with them and I just like I just looked at both all of them and I said I'm so sorry. It's such a loss because he is What a loss. Did you see the special we did on Netflix at the comedy show at the comedy show that binder. Do you know Mike binder? We're very good friends of fire Love him. He's one of the greatest one of the greatest and he you know, I have to he's doing a podcast He's doing a showtime thing on comedians that have podcasts. Is he talked to are you on it yet? No never asked me but my point is
Starting point is 01:16:51 He's like he's like the he's like the hate asian, you know Yeah, but nine months ago when I got sober and I was using He was the one of the only guys I would call Because he is one of those guys that's been in the business for a very long time. I respect but also will pick up the phone So when I'm dying and I'm lost. Yeah, that dude picks up his friend. He helped me so much. He took me to meeting Hey, I'm not are you the great guy? He's a great guy. He's a great guy. He's a great guy. Anyway, give everyone a round of applause Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Awesome. See me on the road. Don't, don't, don't do it. He's so fucked! Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Barely ad-free on Amazon Music, download the
Starting point is 01:17:56 Amazon Music app today, or you can listen ad-free with Wondri Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondri.com slash survey.

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