TigerBelly - Ep 387: The Academy Award for Acting in a Podcast (Goes To...)

Episode Date: February 22, 2023

Bobby is the Mayor of Sawtelle. Did Khalyla get a courtesy like? We talk eyeball acting, blind photographers, and have the ice cream debate. Go to www.zocdoc.com/belly and down...load the Zocdoc app for FREE. Then find and book a top-rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon music download the app today He had relapsed and he had lied to me for three months about it. Oh, that's right That was the real and I that was the night I find I found out he had relapsed right before we were about to do a live show And I cried for two hours. My eyes were all puffy and I was like, oh my god, I cannot That was a good lie That was you have three months lie. That's fucking good You know, he was so he was so sneaky too because I he was acting like a crackhead So I only had him I was like you need to get tested for except for marijuana
Starting point is 00:00:53 Marijuana is the last thing on my mind because I was like he's not gonna smoke weed I thought for sure he was gonna go with like everything. He's talked about in the past and vikes I you know like crazy other thing. Yeah, you thought I was on bath salts I genuinely thought like you were on some type of lake. What is that other one that? Yeah, I guess bath salts. Yeah. Yeah, I Don't even know what I get that though. Can you is that the same stuff you get a bad bed bathroom beyond nobody tell him, please Is it the same bath salts you get a bed bath you have six bags of Epsom upstairs. That's bath salts you try I tried it. I tried it. He tried eating
Starting point is 00:01:29 You have to urge you urge to eat people but it's a specific it's a it's a it's a um What do you call it? It's a um Bath salts they just call it that but it's not bath salts What do you mean is it bath salts like do you oh you're asking if you can take um street bath salts and actually bathe in it Yes, I don't think so. Sweetie. Can I take the drug bath salts and bathe in it? I think I think it's gonna get absorbed up your ass. So then you will start eating people Okay, so they're two different things. Yeah, I don't think it's gonna cleanse you. You should just remark it and read You know what I mean? What would you like to call it? That's the real what what would you like to call it?
Starting point is 00:02:13 Oh, yeah, um Dahmer Just yeah, yeah, you'll give me some Dahmer. Are you doing the D? Yeah. Yeah, because Dahmer you eat people All right, and that's what you do right now people take bath salts and they eat people, right? Or they chew on their faces. They try to yeah. Yeah. Is that eating somebody though when you chew on a face Oh, I would yeah put that in the cat human gum Are they swallowing? I don't they love they love the chew on its flesh, but they're not really swallowing I don't know. I've never been on bath salts. I have a question for you guys
Starting point is 00:02:44 I'm not all the way caught up on the last of us yet So don't tell me about episode four. Don't tell me about episode three. Have you both been watching? It's only three four. There's four now last night. Oh, that's all I didn't see four. I saw three I heard three was amazing. I'm not there yet There's four and then they're doing the next one early on Friday Nick Offerman is such a great actor Yeah, I would like to say it's hard to admit that could have been you No, I can't no be I'll tell you why I could have been you I'll tell you why it's not me There was
Starting point is 00:03:13 I don't know if this is a spoiler alert, but um, that's not do you see this episode with nick offerman? Okay, I'm not gonna give you A spoiler halfway through the second episode. Okay, but There's a scene where he's old and he's with that other man old and they're at the table his lover And there's a serious thing going on And they're focused on each other and the their eyeballs Are fucking acting man That's good
Starting point is 00:03:42 Like the rest of the face isn't but like the daniel dayluis eyes. They got it. They got it. They got it Like it's like I can't do that. Show me. Show me. Look at me right now and just I can't go. All right So it's only your eyeballs can dance. Right. Look at me All right, hold on. Well, open your eyes first, Bobby. They're open. What are you doing? What are you guys doing? All right, just making the cameras getting your eyes. Yep. I'm when I look at you So when my eyeballs are doing it, all right, I'll be the judge. No, I'll tell you why this is not fair I'll just give it a try. I'll tell you why I'm gonna do it I'll tell you why I'll tell you why I'm gonna do it. I'll tell you why
Starting point is 00:04:16 I'll tell you why because my eyeballs are slanty. No. Oh, that's not Right. How what can you do with these? Stephen yun can do it No I'll tell you why He can only do two right. He can do regular asian eyes, right and he can do shock No, he yeah, he does this I'm fucking the walking dead When the when the zombies come Right when they're not there. He's regular. I think he does have bigger eyeballs though. Yeah, he's got bigger eyeballs
Starting point is 00:04:45 Oh, thank you so much. He got bigger eyeballs this guy, right? I've seen his eyeballs. All right, so let's try They cross there for a second. Yeah, they did dance they dance towards each other You have a thought though. What is your thought when you turn to her? So we the audience knows Oh, yeah, so let me think right put an actual emotional thought. Let's copy this. Let's go real. All right, you have you just You just told me that you have um Crone's disease. Oh wait that you don't care about that because I actually have like colitis and you've never cared I don't care about that at all. Yeah, you're right I don't care about her colitis
Starting point is 00:05:19 How about this? How about this? You don't care about her colitis. No, no, no, no, something more terminal Bobby I have um glioblastoma. I have three months to live. You know, it's so great about that one I don't know what that means. So it just sounds like you have some sort of superpower Yeah, man, like hey x-man, what's your power? Glioblastoma? Oh, they're like, oh, we'll back up. She's gonna fuck us up. You have fireballs on your eyes? So yeah, I have a brain tumor knock on wood. I can understand great brain and I have three months to live Why are you laughing? The idea of you dying in three months. It's just crazy
Starting point is 00:05:53 I can't do it, but I'm gonna try it. Well, I'm gonna I'm gonna play this you have to tell me right But it depends. I it depends on how good you are. Okay in the scene. Okay Okay Well, I have to be doing something. So what am I doing? I'm playing stardew. No, you're just here. We're here What? Hey guys, no, I have to be playing stardew the valley Okay, I have to be yet. So let me just play a little bit. Oh my god. What what? Okay. Just narrow it I get out of the car. I get out of the car. There's no car. I got Already nervous
Starting point is 00:06:24 I get nervous when I'm upset, right? So I got out of the house. Oh my god. It's summertime. Oh my my fucking Melons are are grown. Yeah harvest time, baby. And I don't have the junimals. So I had to pick them myself knock knock Do Hold on. Hold on. I'm picking melons I'm picking the melons Hey, sweetie. I'm here to feed the cat. Oh fuck push pause Yeah, what's up? Hey, I am I just came by to feed the cats, but um I also had um something I wanted to talk to you about but um
Starting point is 00:06:58 I think maybe um You know, we should move over to the living room for this. Well, I I know but Sometimes the cats will They'll put the power of my controller and on Do you know what I mean? Pause my game and then all of a sudden it's night and then I'm going to tie and then I'm going to end up in Harvey's clinic Yeah, and then half my inventory. I have to fucking buy from the fucking fighters guild Yeah, I get that and so I kind of want to take keeping my eye out on the controller
Starting point is 00:07:26 So that the cats don't fucking unpause my game. Okay. We'll just sit here then that'd be great I missed this bed Oh, wow, she's good Stay in this stay in this stay in this she's changed the wallpaper. Yeah, the earrings are those Huh? They're pretty Demetrius. Oh No, she she he's cool Stay in the club. Um We didn't fuck yet
Starting point is 00:07:52 That's okay. You know what? It's your life. It's because I'm not gay And if you did and if you were it'd be okay. We fucked Stay in it. I'm happy for you. Thank you. I didn't he didn't fuck me Oh, okay. Yeah, I only fucked him up the fucker. Is there shame around him if you you if he were to shame for him because he's muslim It's shame for him and his family and his whole religion, but you know, it was it was difficult to convince him to do it But um, I got a mat Oh, what was praying mats that the muslims use they put it over the bed, right? And then I um had hummus ready
Starting point is 00:08:31 Huh, what hummus? Oh, okay. Yeah, because they love that. It's the lube Yeah And he's like, hey buddy, why you you know what I mean putting hummus in my butthole, right? It's it's great hummus from panini But I go shut the fuck up man Demetrius. I don't know. That's a weird muslim name But I like him with the news hidden within his collar. So I'm jammed. Let's just let me finish. I just jammed in his butthole And I'm telling you right now. It's like Perfect Go ahead. What's up?
Starting point is 00:09:06 No, I mean I respect that. Yeah. Yeah. It sounds like you're doing really well in life. I'm not I'm I mean, I just what what did I just tell you? I'm 51 years old playing fucking stardew valley and I'm doing I'm fucking muslims in the butthole on my bed You think I'm doing well. It sounds on brand is all I'm saying. Okay. I can I can buy that Why you're smiling I'm not I I just think that you're I thought my life was falling apart and then I come here And I'll feel a little bit better Yeah, all right. Well good to see you Well, look
Starting point is 00:09:40 I need I need to be serious for a second because what I'm about to tell you is really emotional for me And um, I don't know. I was just hoping I could have your ear for a few minutes What is it? So I just wanted to come here and tell you how much the last 10 years Have meant to me And it seems as though I am at The sunset of my life Because I
Starting point is 00:10:12 Just got told I only have three months to live And I don't want you to freak out I don't want you to I just want I just wanted you to be the first one to know And I don't want it to be a big deal and I was hoping it could just stay between you and me Between you and me and that I hope that you continue with tiger belly And that I just wanted to thank you for everything
Starting point is 00:10:42 I'm so sorry You hungry I got almost Hey, babe. Who is that babe? Dmitrius stay in the closet. There's hot mess in my Dmitris stay in the closet. Who's this guy? That was great acting. First of all, she wasn't acting She took that she took that concert Bro Klyla you don't have cancer, do you? Well, can I say something you can't fucking do that because you went a little too real
Starting point is 00:11:09 That was way too real. I thought you were telling that was so good. Honestly thought you were acting. Why aren't you acting? You're she's an actress. I can't do that No, no, no, no, no, no, that was so good Stop stop stop. I feel like you did pull that and the academy award for acting in a podcast goes to Kalyla goon. You know what got me uncomfortable is how real it got and then I can tell you because he was already starting to Prep the cry because his nose his nostrils were fair Hey, man, that's so I got taught that in acting class the nose flare move, but then she got fucking real, dude Yeah, that was crazy. You were pulling for something. That was yeah pulling. Oh, yeah
Starting point is 00:11:44 I mean, it's very raw still for me everything between him and I so it's not an Difficult place to pull from Jesus, man. Wow Yeah, wow, that was amazing Anyway, no, that was That was so good. Anyway, yeah, um, it makes me I'm scared. No, my mom would be so mad if she heard this because she Last of us, maybe Seriously, let's go back to the last one. I wanted to ask you about the last of us my original question was um
Starting point is 00:12:09 Every everyone by now in those cordyceps. Oh, yeah, right? Like do you think that there is an impact on like brands that are like selling cordyceps as like Um, like vitamins supplements and stuff like for sigmatic or all these other brands that are like putting cordyceps at like the front Do you think that something like the last of us would like make people be like, I don't want to take that and put it in my body I'm pretty sure. Yeah Yeah, because um I didn't drink water after I watched the movie waterworld For like a year
Starting point is 00:12:43 I was like, this is too much water. I can't do it. You know what I mean? So you're right It has a subliminal that logic checks out, right? It checks out. You know, I mean, it's like I think about any movie So you see yeah, you know Volcano and I didn't go buy a fucking bonfire for the bonfire. You know how I love camping. Yeah, and I love walking by bonfires My point is is that do you like the show? I love it. You've never played the game, right? I never played the game. You know what I love about the game Here's the one thing I love about the show Okay
Starting point is 00:13:14 Is that opening sequence Isn't right is in the game Oh, really with slight changes, but it was slight changes, but it has that same With a neighbor the older lady you're in the truck. Were they in a truck in the opening scene? It was a pickup truck Tommy is after all white. Yeah, but the same daughter thing the same whole The the city looked the same the small town looked the same. I was like I know this the roads. Yeah, I know this sequence After that, it's come a little different. Yeah, right, but because they had to change it
Starting point is 00:13:46 I don't know. I don't remember if the cordyceps like mushroom zombies were in the game. Were they they were the flickers Yeah, or the flickers clickers clickers. I mean. Yeah. Yeah, but I thought that um Wow, what a what a good show. It's like, um, probably one of the best Video game adaptations I've ever seen the best was crazy though. Okay. I'm spoiler alert If you guys aren't caught up to episode two don't listen to what I'm saying right now but even like one of my favorite scenes is when they go to like Indonesia and they go to that professor who studies mycology And basically they're like, what do we do? We need a vaccine we did so and so and she's like there are no vaccines
Starting point is 00:14:21 There are no medicines and the guy's like, what do we do? And she was like bomb Bomb everything everything. Yeah to my family. It's crazy crazy. Yeah, what a um cool show Um, hopefully borderlands is that good What's what's what's what it's the rumorville? Everyone knows you're in it borderlands. Yeah, um, but I there's tidbit of information out there. Um And um I had mushrooms earlier court is something court is something
Starting point is 00:14:57 No, but I don't I'm still very hopeful of it, but um, there's reshoots. I guess that happens all the time Um, and um, I'm not really that jealous that Andrew Santino is working all the time Is there a reason you brought that up? I don't know. I just said that. Yeah, it's just yeah. Yeah, I just um He's getting a lot and I'm so happy for him What is the feeling in your chest when you see your friends doing things you yourself want to do the real feeling The real feeling. Yeah, I know you're happy No, I am happy Zoc doc yeah for your mind and your body
Starting point is 00:15:39 Zoc doc is the only free app that lets you find and book doctors who are patient-reviewed you guys You know, we yelp food, right? And what the best restaurants are, right? Sometimes we do it with clothings, right? But lao we have one with the most important lao Lao Yeah, which is the asian now now lao they have right for the doctor and and it's it's this app is so good Tell them about it. So if you've been stewing over a health problem like for instance like my eczema has flared up And I need a great dermatologist now. I can go to zoc doc and I can read patient reviews
Starting point is 00:16:19 And figure out who the best match for me is and my needs and Basically zoc doc is the only free app that lets you find and book doctors who are patient-reviewed Take your insurance and are available when you need them and treat almost every condition under the sun And I mean every doctor every specialty is on there. I have leg seizures And with zoc doc you can book an appointment with a few taps in their app and start feeling better Faster with zoc doc. There are no alarms and no surprises choose from thousands of patient-reviewed doctors and specialists browser doctor profiles Upload and verify your insurance information and get the care you need. Yeah, they have really good doctors You know, like, you know, sometimes there's doctors like the guy that did the, you know, human centipede
Starting point is 00:16:59 You don't want that one. You don't want that guy. Yeah, because if that guy's on there, you're like, nah That's one-starred hard pass hard pass go to zoc doc dot com slash bell and download the zoc doc app for free Then find and book a top rated doctor today. Many are available within 24 hours. That's zoc doc com slash belly once again at zoc doc dot com slash belly zoc doc dot com slash belly No, I am happy here's but also I want to be I want to be honest Yeah, right. Why would I you know, I'm a 51 year old man I like to talk about things that are real to me and I want to share my real emotions. Um, number one
Starting point is 00:17:41 um, there is a little bit of Not jealousy, I don't say right. It's just like, um Yeah, jealousy Because he went to paris to do fashion week. Yeah, right He comes back in the town Nothing, you know, I mean, he doesn't know anything about the movie and then all of a sudden he gets a call like two days in I think you're gonna get this movie in Australia, so he he's in a whirlwind
Starting point is 00:18:07 Mm-hmm, right and I was in that a year ago. You remember I was just so busy going here or there this and that so and I could tell that One time he did tell me like, ah, man, you're working all the time. It's great. I just And it went back into him like I gotta call my agent. You know what I mean? So it's like it's I think it's a healthy thing Is it or no, I'd like to raise my hand. I think uh, dr Drew explained like jealousy and envy really well to us on Um, I don't know if it was on trash tuesday, but I think it's a very normal feeling But I also would like to add something that maybe you don't have to raise your hand
Starting point is 00:18:43 Yeah, go ahead I think that Andrew is very active in making like decisions like with his reps and whatnot Like as someone who is part of your scheduling team and your management team and your reps I will say that you are in a whirlwind. We're just You are you are I'm telling you bobby like we're hardly like you were It's so hard to even like record tiger belly because you are in so many things these next couple months and
Starting point is 00:19:20 My argument are things I've been doing so it doesn't feel here's the deal. It's like if I got It's it's when you get that surprise call. It's a dopamine hit Right, so it's like if I got a call all of a sudden like You're not gonna believe this but you got to be in Tasmania right now because you're doing a Tasmanian movie at the devil I could test me Honestly, if they were to do a live action of their Tasmanian yes, yes, yes Yeah, and they want you to play the devil. I'm like in Tasmania. I'm like, all right. I'm an animal Tax is yeah, man. You're the first one was a Tasmanian and devil in looney tunes. Yes
Starting point is 00:19:56 Okay, so if there was a live action of that, I promise you if they choose anybody else But you yeah, like that's sacrilegious. Exactly. That's what I thought because you are the human version of that I believe that a full heartedly, but I'm pretty sure ken jung will get it No, that's you. That's you bobby. That's so you. Yeah. Yeah, that'd be great Your essence everything about you is that and you know what? I would go real on it. You know what I would do I would wash my face with the Rogan I'm not being real. I'm being real. I would do all the things that necessary. You mean I would go to Glendale Finally get your beard implants. No, I would hang out with them some other Tasmanian
Starting point is 00:20:35 No, but like, you know, Filipinos are Armenians. Those are two in Glendale. Yeah I wouldn't go like what how do you grow hair on your face lady? But it's like research research I would do research and see how they live. You know what I mean for sure Is that racist? No, we just called a group of people Tasmanian It's fine. It's totally fine It felt racist But you know what I mean? I'm gonna go for it. Yeah, but yeah, I would do stuff. You know what I mean? But um, well here my point to what claula was saying is you're in a hurricane
Starting point is 00:21:06 You have it. You're just in the you're the center of it. So it's calm We get the after effects of the hurricane. Yeah, but I also get bad news like, um, friday Okay, but check this out. Uh, no, no, no, no, no, this is good. Yeah, star meter 4629 and then I have yours here 2928 so you're higher wait wait four six four is higher than two No, but number one is you want to be number one number one is like margot Robbie brad Pitt number five You're 2,928 Santino
Starting point is 00:21:37 4,629 your star meter your star meter is higher, which means more people in industry are clicking on you Are reaching out to your reps Interesting. So that's that. Yeah, I don't I have to first understand the number The number doesn't seem right. You'll be you should have prefaced it first with this is how this work He has higher number. Yeah, I would be I would be beating you because I'm at 300,000 Yeah, exactly. Congratulations. So I'm not beating you're killing it. I'm not beating they should change the fucking meter Like yeah, yeah, for example, like let me see. I'll try to pull up like uh Like you find somebody that's underneath me. That's a bigger star and then I'll be able to understand it
Starting point is 00:22:17 Go to I'll tell you who to go to Ken Jeong Oh, no, no, don't go to that. I don't think you want to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So like this solid like so margot Robbie, right? Yeah, she's 24. Wow Do the closer to number one means like you're the person right now And what am I you're In the thousands 2,900 which is considered very high because then in Andrew's 4,000 and there's a lot of people below that Okay, okay. Um, that's good. Did could you throw in one more name in there? Who do you want? I think we should invite on the show we will I want to do it but put in there. Let's cut this his name out
Starting point is 00:22:50 Okay, well, there's this actor. I'm pulling up. Oh, she's even on there. He stopped saying his name. Oh, yeah What is it 76,000? 76,000 and you're at 4,000. No, you're 2000 2000 put that into perspective. I like it. Let's move on. I feel good There we go. Why am I such a fucking? I gotta let that go, huh? I mean, let's get into it. No, I just I have these deep-seated like competitive things And I just will never let it go. What does your therapist say? It's not good Fine. Well, what are tools?
Starting point is 00:23:26 They're not good at all. I mean, what is what does she say you can do beating also? Does he even have a photo in his clothes at 59? That's amazing doesn't even have a headshot. She's crushing after after my performance. I might shoot up You might shoot up there, man No, it's uh, I don't you know, but uh, but can I just let's let's end this andra sentino I'm very I honestly believe that he's one of my best friends of all time I love him so much Um, he's cranky. You know, I mean, he's difficult at times, but I'm he's so talented and I can't believe
Starting point is 00:24:02 I think the reason why I even you know, because I had other people that wanted to do podcasts with me Back in the day and I was just like, no, this is the guy. It was always going to be him It's always going to be him. It was because he's just I got everything that I want like I'll tell you that I Friday night I watched I was on stage At the call I went up on stage. I literally went no one could follow me tonight I was on fire You know what I mean? I was like
Starting point is 00:24:32 Everyone that wanted to suck the juices inside my dick. Mm-hmm. No. Yeah, not everyone Right, but most everybody 20 percent. No most is like 60 percent. Thank you Thank you, but Tim Dillon went up after me and showed me how it was done and when I honestly And when I can see when I was on the side I was watching him and I love seeing that I love seeing like, oh, this is what I can aspire to be this dude is So good on stage I love Tim Dillon. He's my favorite comic right now
Starting point is 00:25:06 because he is doing things that um Um, it's kind of the same energy as mine, but it's far more complex His bits. It's so good. He's like on a He's a free man on on stage. He doesn't care and I want to get there But um, yeah, anyway, I like seeing people that are killing it and that are more talented And that's the blessing about being at these comedy clubs because I can watch people and go Wow, this is the top of the line I'm I'm
Starting point is 00:25:39 Involved doing comedy and with the greatest people to ever do it Do you think if you didn't have aspirations towards doing television or like big movies that you would be freer as a stand-up? I think that I could have had more of a career like koi Joe koi where it was just mostly he spent his career doing stand-up and his Whole focus. I mean obviously we had pit shows and this and that together, but he just hit it 10 times harder than me and um went up way more and um
Starting point is 00:26:15 Look at him now, and I'm he's another one. I'm like I always knew it You know it when you see it I tell that to fucking Jesse Johnson You know, I mean uh juicy from bad friends. I go She because you got a new she got a new place Right and she you could see her moving up right and you could see the excitement in her eyes
Starting point is 00:26:39 And I can just tell there's such a goodness inside her. Oh my god And like just like a like a genuine kind of thing with her Yeah, she doesn't talk shit about other people. No, she just like yeah, she deserves it all She's pure. Yeah, she's a pure person and she's unaffected by it all and she's like um I mean because we I helped her get an audition. He didn't she didn't get it And I helped her with it and when she didn't get it. I heard it was really close though It was close because she um was great. Yeah, you know what I mean? And I um, but she took the news
Starting point is 00:27:17 In a very healthy way not me You know what I mean? I'm like, uh, I should kill myself. You know what I mean? I'm so unlikable. I've said that to myself. Yeah, but like her. She's like, no, I didn't it's not my time You know what I mean? I tried my best, right? And I'm like, oh You're pure You know, I'm tainted But I want to be pure. So, okay. I can say this. I could say this. Okay. So obviously I'm dating, right? And I've had two incidences where it was like, let's get a free meal kind of a day. Yeah one in hawaii, right?
Starting point is 00:27:50 And I just had one in LA, right where they bring their friends. They're like, hey, can I bring a friend? Yeah, so they bring a friend, right? You're having dinner at a nice restaurant and there's just a feeling Because they're also bombarding you with a bunch of industry questions. Okay, right? And now you turn into the mentor Yeah, you're right. And it's a role that I've played before. I like being the mentor. Okay, right? Um, but once that hit I'm like, I'm the mentor This is, you know what I mean? A free meal situation. I just I'm emotionally out Right, right? And then is your dick still in? No. Oh, even dick? So both emotions and dick are out
Starting point is 00:28:30 No, because their pussies aren't in Or my dick could be in the pussies. I've got to enter the ring. No, I'm when you're gambling you got to put Annie up You know, right? And if I throw my dick in the fucking thing, you know, and then they're not adding it up They can't play no one's playing with you. No one's playing poker by yourself, right? Okay. I like I want to know what it's like so What is the moment where you you're like, oh This is more of an opportunistic situation and I'm just kind of they think I'm there take it in Or you know, I'm gonna open some door for them. Like what is the moment?
Starting point is 00:29:05 Like what is the thought that comes through your head and what is For this particular situation, when was the moment you were like, oh fuck Was it like it happened early on in the dinner? Oh, so previous to the dinner you didn't know. No, you just thought hey, yeah bring a girlfriend. I don't care Yeah, yeah, and you know sometime during the dinner. I'm like I realized it, but you know, I am not a mean guy I was very pleasant and nice I have did they choose the restaurant and was it I did but it's always like where are you taking us? Where did you choose? Yeah, where did you choose? I don't want to say it. Okay. Yeah, but um
Starting point is 00:29:41 Because this place that I choose And I have to talk to the fucking host of the fucking restaurant. I think I know which one Can I just say it and we'll bleep it out? No, no, no, I'll tell you why I have to tell the host Can we just bleep it out because he always says good to see you again two days in a row And then I had one girl go you take a lot of girls here. I go. No, no, no, I like you. You're a little alone I walk here. I don't right. Can I guess? Yeah, go ahead. I think it's the place you we went Um when we first broke up which has bleeped us out No, wow bleep that out. No, is it no boo? No, interesting
Starting point is 00:30:17 Could be boiling crab Stop boiling crab. No, damn. Anyway, um And then I you know, I got banned from tiddler too now Do you know that update? Yeah, I have no I have no apps now except for rya and rya Now I don't even look at the photos in rya. I just say yes I'm so desperate. I know you're this is gonna set you off bobby, but I really did consider Not telling you this is gonna hurt my feelings. I don't I can't handle it right now. I'm very No, but it's another friend of yours who liked me
Starting point is 00:30:48 We'll bleep it out. Okay rya, but I want to know if this hurts your feelings or not because he very much knows It was okay here. I just And describe your feelings and everything we're gonna keep all this in. Let's just describe your feelings All right, oh my god All right, well I'll tell you this right now You saw it. Yeah, I didn't see it. You didn't see it. You don't need to show me. I'll want to just feel But it is this is a good one This is a good one because why did your face do this russell?
Starting point is 00:31:20 Yeah, but this is a good one because this feels If it if for most people that I know, you know, I'm like I have the power Right to give him a call or whatever not that I would but this person right here Is I feel like he's above me and I'm a huge Admires of his and I have to let that go and I'm gonna let you have that. I don't I won't have that. Thank you I'm gonna exit right now. Yeah exit out right now But my point is is that I would let you have it. I will and because he did this now, right?
Starting point is 00:31:56 We're done. You're not going to be on tiger belly, buddy No, I would still have him on the podcast come on the podcast I would still have him on the podcast because I love him. Yeah, right, but it's interesting to me I think isn't I when I saw it. I was like, there's just no way he must have thought I was somebody else No, he does it's a small list of people. It's a small list of people and it burns my soul and um Wow, it's a war. It's shocking, right? It's so shocking. I know I was shocked. I was like, there's no It's because of the caliber
Starting point is 00:32:26 You get the caliber I don't get the caliber This guy has credits Right. I don't when I'm on there You know, I get fucking, you know, I mean three Somebody has three fucking followers on tiktok. Yeah, but baby you fucking bought you got bored of this pussy in two years You're you've had it all I get bored of pussy in a week
Starting point is 00:32:46 Right two years is a long time Try eating a meal the same meal for two years every day Right for years. I eat yours two years every day, right? You did. Yeah Balloot It's not balloon. I I ate balloon and durian fruit Caviar, yeah, no, I'm kidding. You're not balloon high end. I like but yeah My point is is I ate it every day for nine years over nine years
Starting point is 00:33:15 All right. So my point is is that That's good. That's love. I know. All right. So but most most people one meal two meals I get kind of like, uh, yeah, you know what I mean? So that's a good thing But my point is is that's a betrayal, but I love it. Oh people listening right now. I just like, you know, what is Uh, there's only a few names. I would just all right. Let's let's play. We're gonna have to cut this out Let's just show the star meter. What's the star meter? Oh, oh Yeah, the star meter and the glue up to take it out. Well, there's so many people. I mean if it's hold on I gotta show you you have to show it to you first. I'll tell the star meter. I want to show it to you. I want to see his face
Starting point is 00:33:51 I don't walk up to him. Walk up to him and then slowly show it to him. I want to see his face Ready? Yeah Huh Right interesting No, let me do you feel your heart. Yeah, does it burn? It's just confused My heart's confused as well. I want to say, but it's just like Interesting very interesting. I think so too. Is that an accident?
Starting point is 00:34:17 I thought it was like don't be too interested. No, I'm not. I can't I don't want to think does he is Did he do it out of just like, um, what do you call courtesy? Like, oh, yeah, I know you No, because I've met comics on there female comics. I don't courtesy like Yeah, I don't courtesy like that's rude. Okay. Okay. So, um star meter This person's Star meter is 3,533. You're up. You're above him. You're above him by a thousand
Starting point is 00:34:47 Yes Fuck yes, fuck you. Fuck you. Yes, and papa didn't even have to do a bunch of features. I did no movies I still get clicked on him. He didn't have to do movies. Oh, you fucking guy. Remember that, chach You'll see. Oh, you'll see what happens. Oh my god. This is the great news Interesting news. What an interesting day. Wow. Wow. You learn you discard. I love it Because I'm gonna discard this. Yeah. Yeah, I'm gonna let it go. Let it go. Yeah. No, no Yeah, but there are some names on there If there's some names on there if I saw that it could start a war
Starting point is 00:35:28 But it shouldn't though. So remember. Yeah, be careful who you show me Because if you want me to get in a war, I'll fight And I win this war. Yeah, but also there's like who cares like I'm I've never I'm I've never and will never go on a date with someone from raya The only reason I even I deleted it and I came back on is because someone you know Yeah Needed me to confirm her. So I had to reopen my app And then confirm her. Um, what do you call it? Like because you can hook people up on raya
Starting point is 00:36:02 And so I confirmed her and when I looked To see like who had piled up on my desk He was one of them. Let me ask you this. Yeah Is there any names that if like they try to like me that you'd be mad at? No, I want you to be with who you want to be with but I'll say this Genuinely if you're like, oh my god, like if Jenna did If fucking Jenna did yeah
Starting point is 00:36:27 If if there we go That's it that's what I'm saying. That's no there isn't it. No. Yeah. Yeah For starters, she wouldn't be my friend if she would if I ever thought that that something that she could ever do But if she were to fucking do me like that after the kind of history we've had together sisterhood and trust. Yeah Oh my god There are names. Okay. Well, then that's it. You went out there. No names. I'm happy for you I thought that maybe along the lines of like a big actor. No, no, no like a personal friend of yours Any of my personal friends. Yeah, fuck. Yeah, I'd really jump them. I throw him in a fucking thorn bush. Yeah
Starting point is 00:37:10 That's such a dumb bitch move. Oh, right. I would I would never do that to a friend Marianne Honestly, kind of funny Yeah, yeah never happened and I would almost kind of give her props for shooting her shot with you. Oh, yeah, that's that's bold Yeah, I mean, yeah funny. It's funny. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'd be like, you know, we're right That's crazy. That's crazy with that crazy. Yeah, not that Marianne. I want you to do it. You know, man It's stores closed. He's happy. Her store is closed. I love her. It's a great girl. You know, it's crazy, Bobby As like she would just never never never hook up with you How does that hurt? How does it make you feel? That really does hurt. Never. What do you mean? What do you mean? Never make out with you?
Starting point is 00:37:51 She likes white boys. That's right. I've seen them. She only likes white boys. Yeah, Kimmel. I forgot. You've seen her with them Yeah, yeah, I've seen them in Denver. They're cute too. They're cute. Oh, real cute. They have abs Uh-huh. That's good. Yeah, but I don't have the I don't like, you know her type either You just aren't for each other. It's okay. What's that? What's that type? What is your type? Stop? Stop? Slow down. I'll slow down and I'm gonna be nice. Be nice. Okay. Can I say try? Be nice. I'm gonna be very nice. Yes friends that listen listen to this show You have to be really nice and I'm gonna be very nice, right? And this is something that I would call myself Okay, okay, and this is the type she is right and it starts with an M. Can you guess what it is?
Starting point is 00:38:32 Yeah, muscular. No, that's not good. That's rude Mermaid No, what she's not a dude if I saw her as a mermaid swimmer. I'd be like it'd be scarier than a great white Mary no, um, I'll just tell you what it is Manatee. No, that's rude. Jesus Christ. That's so crazy. Keep that in keep that in Maybe it is manatee You shifted it No, it's like a manatee mermaid combination. Well, manatees were thought to be mermaids
Starting point is 00:39:03 That's true. Yeah, that's why I said manatee. Right, right Manatee's close, but that's rude. My m word is get it mythological Oh, that's so sweet. That's a sweet one. She's mythological like the dark crystal though. Yeah Yeah, I mean the lady that pulls the eye out Talented, yeah The lady that pulls her eye out under the dark crystal stole the movie. You're so lucky. She would actually laugh at that. Yeah She would yeah, she would you remember the lady that pulled her eye out. Yeah. Yeah, what an important, you know, I mean
Starting point is 00:39:37 Figure in the movie and in my life. She's like, um a sage Right to somebody that you you know She has all those planetary things in her building, right? Right and she can pull your eyeballs out. How dope is that and still see How incredible is that? If that was a power that'd be dope I would leave my eyeball in people's houses And they're like cleaning up and they go, why is this eyeball? Bobby
Starting point is 00:40:03 He saw me fuck my you know me or whatever. You know what I mean? And I love you. These aren't my words. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah I love you. His words do not reflect. She can't pull her eyeballs out. I know. Yeah. Yeah Anyway, she's great. Very mythological funny to me when two people like you guys when you first met each other It's like an immediate dislike for each other. It's because we're the same type Oh, you know like X factor. Yeah, because she's also very out like outgoing and kind of loud and very like Yes, stuff. Yes, I'm bonkers. She's fun. No, she's so fun She's personally driven. Yes. This is what I am, right? She's also she looks weird and I'm not saying that in a bad way She's unique looking. That's not the word I would use
Starting point is 00:40:45 That's not the word I would use so the dark crystal. Yeah. Yeah I mean, I guess the dark crystal lady is unique, but that's not the word I would use I know you said mythological. We'll stop there. We'll stop there. Yeah I mean, I could just talk about myself though, right and it's like I'm um Um, let's see. Let's see. I am um I turn heads Oh, you're a head turner. Yeah. Yeah, she does the same because she's an excellent dancer So she goes to all of the ballroom bachata. That's all I mean
Starting point is 00:41:16 People turn their heads in fear For you. Yeah Sometimes with you if I go to the midwest and they don't know who I am Yes, no, I've been to Oklahoma. You're so cute It doesn't matter. People like will follow me around the store and all that stuff I look like I don't have money Right, so they'll like follow me around the store and you're mean. Uh, can we help you sir? Right, I go. I'm just looking for fucking coins
Starting point is 00:41:42 You have those little presidential coins at this gift shop Right, what what coins are you looking for? Do you have um? Roosevelt teddy Right and like we don't have that sir And I go okay. Bye That's the interactions I have Like when I used to go to the baker's my brother asked my brother my brother knows we walked into um A baker's shop in um phoenix where my mom lives and he goes I was there
Starting point is 00:42:10 Yeah, you can just feel a shift In the in the place. They were rude to you. I'll tell you who's the rudest to you. Tell me. Um, Why was there when that happened? Yeah, um, we were in Gilbert, Arizona Uh-huh. It was an ice cream shop and the girl working there was maybe like a 19 year old Like what seemed like like like a Mormon white girl. Yeah on pretty. Yeah, and she looked at you guys like Yuck, but then God gave you the universe gave you a favor. Someone walked in And he was like, oh my god Bobby Lee and those are the gifts and then she all of a sudden turned
Starting point is 00:42:47 You know switched her. I love when that happened and she was like, oh my god Like, yeah, what do you do? But she was extremely rude to you Yeah, and I and when girl also sometimes goes like I can tell like I would never fuck you Like you're not even a sexual thing, but I want to say because they're doing it with their minds I want to say you don't know fuck you either You know what I mean, but you can't say that out of nowhere, you know That would be crazy. That would be insane Like if you just instinctually and then you said that out loud, it just would not the party would ruin you're on TMZ
Starting point is 00:43:18 Yeah, yeah, yeah, but like I want to say that to like, do you know what I do too? You know what I mean? I kill it as well. You know what I mean, but you can't say that. Yeah, because the way she was acting It was like beyond just like apathy. It wasn't like she was just doing her job She went out of her way to roll her eyes to kind of like have this stink face. It's not in my mind I experience these things, you know, it's not happened as much now You know what I mean because I feel like I just I'm more I feel more confident and I also um
Starting point is 00:43:49 Um, I don't I'm not in those areas either, right? I haven't been in a situation like that But my point is is that I feel like even last night I was at um sautel We're all my favorite restaurants aren't so often. I feel like before I remember feeling Self-conscious or a little bit there years ago and now I feel like I'm the mayor of that street You've always been though. I tell is great the mayor of that Always bit of that street. Yeah ever since we've been going to sautel for a long time before that is what I was saying yet Yeah, and you everyone always stops you there. You're like a king of sautel. Yeah, I love the I like to being the king of sautel
Starting point is 00:44:24 I like being the king a little tokyo And also the king of korea town Those are my three spots where I'm like I feel safe Yeah, is that where you um take dates then? You should take them to those. Oh, no, he does. I promise you he does. I took um a date to um that um Shabu Shabu place in sautel That's a great one. It's one of the best ones imaginable
Starting point is 00:44:49 That the vegetables are organic if you don't know what shabu shabu is And you live in the Midwest or whatever if you're ever in a bigger city you got to go basically what it is It's they give you like a bowl of fresh vegetables And then thinly sliced meat not frozen, right? And they give you a pot of boiling something broth of some sort you can choose usually It's old school is just water. Oh dashi. What dashi broth just water and like kombu. Yeah, bro Fuck yeah, dude, but the one I go to now has a tomato sauce There's a miso sauce. So I do the tomato my point is is that you boil the the meat in for just 10 seconds
Starting point is 00:45:27 It boils all the way through. It's just a really clean type of food But then I had ice cream after that and I diarrhea all night last night Um, how long do you have to be how many years do you have to be lactose intolerant before you admit your lactose intolerant? I'm lactose for sure king lactose. He's also king lactose baby. I'm the king of all King diarrhea like I'm the king of it. But why do you still take chances? um It's a challenge for my butthole and I like the burning sensation I think you do I think there's I'm addicted to the burning sensation. I think
Starting point is 00:45:58 It's exciting. It is and also you get everything out So you're using it as a laxative. Yeah To feel skinny. I don't feel skinny afterwards. I eat more ice cream. Actually last night I did I had two scoops of rocky road after I had lactose Do that as an experiment. Yeah, I go like does it keep going? Is this a never-ending fucking thing and let me I know the answer. What is it? It is It keeps going. It's a never-ending thing. So I could eat fucking ice cream 24 hours a day and it would never stop. And what's in rocky road? Are there nuts in there?
Starting point is 00:46:29 Yeah, I love the nuts. The nuts just fly out your butt. I have a trivia question, right? What who what ice cream company created Rocky Road and if you can guess it, I'll give you a hundred dollars in cash Baskin Robbins briars What'd you say briars briars? What'd you say? Ben and Jerry's I said, uh, Baskin Robbins. Yeah, I know Baskin bars briars. Yeah, you Hogendoss
Starting point is 00:46:59 None of your right. You are the closest. Hold on. So it's a store one. It's No, it starts with a B then. No The company is called dryers Can I just get a half? No, no, you don't get any money for that but very close. No You said briars Briars is an ice cream brand. No, it's not briars ice cream briars. Are you confusing it with wait? I could be wrong Is there a dryers or a briars? That's briars. Give me a dryers. There is a dryers also Oh, yeah, so you're right. If you're wrong then you're wrong. It's dryers
Starting point is 00:47:32 That's what I'm saying. Can I get 50 bucks? No, because it's a completely different company, but one letter off Yeah, there's a dryers. It's almost the same like font. Yeah, but who came before dryers. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, don't you love ice cream? Everyone it's my favorite. It's my favorite dessert of all time. Yeah, but like, okay, you're shitting so much I don't give a fuck man. I love it. The but the best flavors for ice cream if let's be real is gonna be ube No, don't fucking lie to me. It's it's so No Island snotty. What you're doing? Magnolia, magnolia ice cream. We're in hawaii
Starting point is 00:48:12 Philippines, magnolia ice cream mango flavored is the best ice cream to you because you grew up with that fucking jungle Shit, you haven't tasted it. Why don't you fucking taste it before you make decisions? Oh, I'm sorry. I've had ice cream I've had out mangoes as well I I fused the two combinations, but I have got magnolia. You haven't have you had we're gonna be in hawaii in a week and a half Have you ever had this flavor driftwood and poo? Yeah, no, you haven't had driftwood and poo because you've but you can know what driftwood Tastes like and what poo tastes like with cream and you know, it's not good. You are the only Listen, I mean you could do with anything. You know what I mean? You're the only radiator juice
Starting point is 00:48:53 you know what I mean radiator juice right and lamp fixtures This is gonna sound really surprising to you Yeah, but I don't think any of us except you knows what poo would taste like You're the only person who might know what poo tastes like. It doesn't taste like anything. That's a trick question How do you know? It's all smell like durian fruit. It's all smell. No taste durian taste. It's delicious But you know what I'm saying the smell isn't what what it tastes like
Starting point is 00:49:21 When you eat durian fruit. Oh, that doesn't what that's not what it smells like I beg to differ. So it smells like it tastes. I don't think so. I've had it before Well, you don't like durian it tastes to me just tastes like a little sweeter with sweeter. It tastes like garlic hereot to me Okay, yeah Yeah, anyway, um cilantro for instance, but to some people cilantro tastes like soap Yeah, to me it tastes like heaven heaven, but I kind of want to taste the soap Heaven just like don't you want to see what they're tasting? Yeah, what is this the most popular flavors. I'm on my americans now. Yeah. Yeah, I like mint chocolate chip
Starting point is 00:49:57 I'm glad that's up there. Me too. And you know, she hates mint. Why it's so hates it. It's just toothpaste Yeah, and it's not tooth. Oh, you're mine. Um, what's coffee is good to is is rocky road down there anywhere Yeah, right there or pistachio right here rocky. Is pistachio on there? Wow. It actually made the list. I'm surprised Why it's delicious. People love pistachio. Yeah. Yeah chocolate obviously is the number one What a boring flavor if you see green ice cream. Do you hope that it's pistachio or matcha? Or pandan or pistachio. I hope it's chocolate chip Mint chocolate chip really when I see purple. I hope it's taro not berry when I see green I hope it's pandan or matcha and not the pistachio. It's so insane
Starting point is 00:50:38 Interesting. It's like you you taste the the fruits of your island. It's in my heart I know it is but what you have to understand is is that we grew up here, right? With real flavors looks at you the Right with real flavors and I don't want to start an ice cream war here, right? But what I'm saying is I go to hawaii and I get the crazy ones when we go to hawaii Can we do an ice cream test of magnolia flavored ice creams? Yeah, but you know that the ice cream plays in hawaii. Yeah, right? That one they have ube. They have all the winners and sometimes I'll go I'll try the ube and when I eat it's like, okay, but it's not as good as the cookies and cream. I don't care what you say
Starting point is 00:51:16 Cookies and creams is a good one. Thank you so much. Yeah, that can't believe that's not on the list Yeah, you know what? I don't like though macaroons. Go fuck yourself Interesting like macaroons or macarons. They're all right macarons. I'm not my favorite I don't like people pay four dollars for them. Yeah. Yeah, I love coconut macaroons not macaroons The little sandwiches like but like a Louie macarons the circular ones with the sandwich. What is it? They're boring. I don't like them. I'm gonna say something really controversial, but I think asian desserts Are the best. I would that's not controversial That's fucking real and I'm gonna put that on the fucking books man. All right. You're absolutely right. Do you know why?
Starting point is 00:51:55 They try new shit second second the closest next one is mediterranean because they have the filo the baklava And all of that like turkish desserts things like that. Okay, you know what? Yeah, I like nuts in my baklava, but like old-timey like british stuff like go fuck yourself England like a truck and that's why you have no teeth because you'd run your teeth out too much sugar Yeah, fucked up teeth And feet I didn't say that I know but isn't that a room? Isn't it isn't that a stereotype that english people have fucked up teeth and fucked up feet? And I've never met one like you know, I mean one with them, but that's a stereotype and I'm not you know, I mean
Starting point is 00:52:32 Yeah, I'm not trying to downgrade. You know, I mean, you know, I mean the the royal family You know, that's who you're worried about. Yeah, I'm not trying to draw I don't want to war with them, but it's like if you look at prince charles Yeah, and that line of family their faces are like it's interesting. Yeah You're I mean like the nose goes this way and the mouth goes this way and there's so many wrinkles and they go Like this and it's like it's like their faces got jumbled up somehow You know royals. Am I not right? Do you know what I'm saying? Were there any hot royals? Princess Diana, but she was married into it. Exactly. Can you look up hot royals?
Starting point is 00:53:10 That sounds like a weird website. No, no, no, I think there was one guy who was who would like I swear to god He had like press Andrew. Was he not hot? The pet the petto. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know why we talked about the royal family Oh, yeah, England and their teeth and their teeth feet. Let's go back to that, right? It's a stereotype I think maybe okay. His name is Inbred. Oh, he's he was inbred is why is the king Charles the second of Spain? Let's look at it And I'll tell you if it's in and he was inbred
Starting point is 00:53:42 How do you know it's inbred because I've seen him. I've seen people talk about talking about the portrait, right? I think it was more than just a portrait. That's what he looked like. I think that made him look good I'm gonna say something mean, but I can't it's okay. He's dead Bobby. It's from 1616 probably very rich Probably had no, I was so mean right now. So what are your thoughts on charles the second that one hit it or not? Wait, but because first of all it could be a bad You know what I mean illustrator see that's the thing about these portraits. What if they're just terrible artists? That's what I'm saying. Okay. I think that the one on the left is definitely what he looks like and the one on Their right was paid extra money to delete the chin
Starting point is 00:54:26 To be like, hey, dude. Can you know he's doing a thing with his lips to bring the chin up. There's no way that you Yeah There's no way your chin can protrude that way For six hours. He sat like that. Yeah pulling his chin up The last But can I just say this too? It's like When you're in a country like that and you see paint paintings of that dude, it's like this It's like people go. Well, Steve Buscemi, right?
Starting point is 00:54:53 Looks weird if Steve Buscemi was a guy that was like a plumber And you saw him on a you know, I mean dating app you would completely swipe the other way But because he's Steve Buscemi, it gives him sexiness, right? So this dude has fame and the power and it changes the way you look at people But also people who are extremely good-looking. I bore of their faces in two days Like I like looking at people with like asymmetry interesting things about them weird moles Like it makes me want to look at them longer And I know that's like
Starting point is 00:55:29 I've been with good-looking men And honestly after a couple days, you're like Yeah But I've seen you look at me in the dark You know what I mean with that face with the love. It's it's part love. Yeah, but it's part confusion I have I've always looked at you with love Amid is there one time just one even for the split second you question just based on Bobby's looks not his attributes I did consider what it would mean
Starting point is 00:55:59 Because I think that his face I love his face so so so much I did worry that like I think his like limbs are real short Here we go. Yeah, that's what you wanted. Here we go. And then I thought to myself like Wow, like I'm so broad-shouldered Exactly, and I'm such like, you know, I'm kind of a little you don't think I've seen your shoulders. What are you Michael Phelps? Every time and I'm so long exactly like an albatross, right? I wouldn't say albatross But I'm so long and like spidery and I'd say more like the guy from fantastic four
Starting point is 00:56:39 Mr. Fantastic. Yeah, the stretchy guy So sometimes I would look at him and be like, oh my god, his limbs are so short and cute But like outside that's okay If you look at the I just posted a photo on instagram of me in high school, right? And every all the people like oh, that was you you're hot. You're hot, right? What are my point is that the what you're seeing now? I did this to myself for you now I just think I did this to myself if I wanted to look good. I could you do look good ended, but better I prefer you now. I like it now. Remember. I like ice cream
Starting point is 00:57:08 I refuse to cut it like shitting every day. I like shitting every day. I like eat what I want to eat That's my point. You're sexy, baby. I am you are okay. So that's it. You know, I mean I mean, everyone here is sexy. I think so in their own way. Yeah, okay. There's somebody out there for everyone you know and um That's the good news for all Although, you know Our country is shifting into a place Where some people are being disenfranchised and some some people are not getting love
Starting point is 00:57:43 And we have to change that and I think social media, you know, I mean is um A bad thing in many ways, you know, it's destroying the way we look at people And how we interact with people and how we see people and it's not A good thing when you look at a girl. I'm naked. Are you looking for like the fine details? Or you do care about like, oh, she's got like for instance Like I have cellulite and you've seen me fully naked and you see my cellulite Like has that ever been like, oh, she has cellulite. I love cellulite and or my stretch marks I have a lot of stretch. I love the stretch marks, but it's never like you've never thought twice about it
Starting point is 00:58:17 I've thought three times about it About mine. Yeah, not twice. Why three times? I just have what are your thoughts? Um, I well The first one the first thought is I'm counting How many I have yeah 18 19 my dimples Yeah 19 stretch marks. Yeah stretch marks. She doesn't have any stretch marks. She's ridiculous. I have Are you Listen what I'm saying to you is this okay is you know, if Every girl if you look at any girl on instagram instagram model, right?
Starting point is 00:58:49 That's not who she is Right. She's using filters makeup, right angles. There's a thousand photos that she picked through to put that one online Right, right. So it's like and you know this in your mind, right? But what but I look at a woman Like sometimes like even now that I'm dating I'll go let's go to a spa And they go why oh, it's fun. That's not why I want to see what you look like without the makeup Because afterwards when you get in the car you look at them and you see who they essentially are And that's where you can see who they are
Starting point is 00:59:25 You know what I mean and you without any makeup you in your natural state is very beautiful Is what I'm saying Okay, you yeah, yeah, I I don't mind my stretch marks and I don't mind my cellulite I I don't care but you and you know and your celebrity guy friends do what you do Do have fun. I am never dating a celebrity again Why That's not her vibe. It's not my vibe. Okay. I want to date a cool boy Yeah, cool boy. Do it
Starting point is 00:59:55 Like the jeweler I'll cut that out Jesus, dude. Jesus christ. Yeah. Anyway, let's move on. Um He's a good dude. Handsome. Uh, nice guy. Let's do let's move on. Um, let's do uh, throw back unhelpful advice Go ahead someone. I want to actually answer this one for this woman Unhopeful advice with barbie and kalayla. Hi. I'm a single 33 year old mom with three kids Six year old son four year old girl and a one year old girl. I just found out my ex married someone He just met two or three weeks ago. My two older kids are with him. My baby was a surprise baby, but beautiful
Starting point is 01:00:30 My question is how do I not worry for my two kids when they go to their dad's house and his wife is there I worry for them a lot. He's never mentioned this person. Everyone who knows my ex is shocked By him marrying her and she wanted to share a photo. Um, just so you can have context of her family Oh, so young babies really young so she's worried that her husband She just doesn't know the woman that her kids are staying with Okay, how do you how do you wrap it? I don't think we should show this Yeah, don't we're not showing this just for you guys. Yeah, okay number one. I have to say beautiful woman Beautiful kids beautiful kids beautiful woman. You have a great life, right? Yeah number two. My opinion is it's never gonna last
Starting point is 01:01:09 Did you think because it was really quick and impulsive you just just no way to know somebody in three weeks It's impossible People can hide themselves for years. There are certain things that I'm hiding You're mean that I don't want people to see and it's like I can dupe that I could probably do this routine for two or three years Without before you show you when you live together and you there's certain things you can't hide You know what I mean? And so, um, there's just no way to know I wish you hid those things longer from me. I know I know I let him loose with you. I learned a lesson though Yeah, day two like never show fun guy
Starting point is 01:01:46 Yeah, yeah, never show fun guy. Cordyceps. Cordyceps. Wait a second. So oh, yeah, you gave Kalala cordyceps You have a cordyceps menagerie Let's not talk about that because um, oh, yeah People are beginning to know about my cordyceps. Let's go. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. No mushrooms. No mushrooms. No no mushrooms But also don't cut that up. Yeah, it totally cares. Who cares who cares? um, I um So she has a brand new baby the guy met someone three weeks ago and then married her spontaneously So now technically that would be the stepmom to your kids. Oh, that's so scary. It's so scary kids
Starting point is 01:02:19 But you know, I would sit my ex-husband down saying hey, dude, like I'm really glad you're happy Seems like, you know, things are moving really fast But like also like just express yourself. He's like this kind of worries me. I'm sure she's a great girl But like I do have trepidations and just give me a moment Maybe like I'm not going to feel very ready to just drop them off with her You know, just like can we get to know her with their high school? Right these kids older? What is no, they're babies It's those kids little baby. Oh, there's no way I don't know older kids are with them. I think the older kids are the older is six years old four-year-old
Starting point is 01:02:52 Oh, those are the older ones a one-year-old baby. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no. It's no kids. No, no, no There's no way you don't know a person. You don't yeah, and um, you got you got to say something Those are your children. Those are your I think that your instinct to be very protective is very warranted. Yeah, although Oh She could be great She could be but it's too soon to tell right and you don't just drop your one-year-old off at a person's place without vetting them I certainly wouldn't would you drop your animals off? Let's say
Starting point is 01:03:23 No, even my animals. No way No way. No way not a fucking chance. I mean like I think bobby tried to introduce julio to one of his girls Yeah, oh my god. I told him who the attacker too soon. Yes, and it's so funny like these these white girls I have to say white girls these white girls these white girls. I got to say I have to say right They are so fucking full on themselves, right? Oh, you don't understand. I was raised with dogs, right? And You know, I'm kind of like a beast master. That's what they called me in high school beast master. I go really Yeah, so it's like you have a dog. That's you know, I mean a little wild Trust me. I've never met a dog that didn't like me and I look at them. I go. I'm telling you right now
Starting point is 01:04:06 He'll eat your face Right, he will eat it. No, you don't get it. Give me an introduction And one girl did that like 10 times. So I was so tired of hearing I go, okay I'll set it up, right? So I set up the fucking the fence thing I put a bunch of stuff and because julio was downstairs and she was upstairs and I and he was going hog wild He was like foaming at the mouth and I just opened the door and I smiled and I go here we go I might have to call 9-1-1 Right julio tried to jump over the fucking fence
Starting point is 01:04:41 Right, right and she was like she started backing like okay, put him away put him away and I looked at and I go You're not a beast master Don't ever say that again beast All right, you'll never this dog is crazy and he only loves who he loves But why do white people do that? I'm a beast master I I think it's because it's hard to imagine that there's a dog like julio that exists. Oh, yeah, pretty crazy Crazy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's pretty insane. But I remember jul's calling me And saying at the tito bobby wants
Starting point is 01:05:18 Julio to meet so and so and I was like jul's that's not a good idea He's gonna bite her pussy. I was like make sure you're there to mediate You already know this is gonna go bad, but she says she's a beast master. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, all right Viacondiola Yeah, but like they can't do it. Yeah, they can't do it. Yeah, so um But I get I mean I just you know I had to try you had because what if she had the ability to learn? Yeah, I kind of wanted them to bite her a little No, no, no a little bit. No, that's ditches, but like a guy a gouge. No way
Starting point is 01:05:55 I don't want anyone suing Right, but she's a little bleep blood. No, thank you. That you'll learn from that. Yeah. No, okay. No. No, no Yeah, but there's no way to do it. Um, it takes what we learned is with julio It takes about three weeks for you to live here before he so if she were to Live here for three weeks Each day he's gonna want to bite her less and less and one day he'll just lick her and kiss her
Starting point is 01:06:24 Yeah, so it's just a matter of like just being around her being around. Yeah He's like, oh, she's not hurting me and it's been three weeks. I guess she's good but I don't understand why he's like that because we We were never abusive and we had him as a puppy I guess you had to do with this because he she wasn't right. Coolio wasn't raised with his mother and the pups. Yeah, so at Uh, only a couple weeks old. He was an orphan didn't have siblings didn't have a mom Didn't have the nutrients from the breast milk for early brain development He was malnourished and so what I was told by a doctor and we had freaking matt bisoner
Starting point is 01:06:59 Who's like the best like dog behaviorist ever? Basically say like in the same way that there are psychopathic humans and humans whose brains don't develop accordingly The same can go for dogs and especially in a case where you have an orphan abandoned dog like that Who didn't get proper brain development like yeah his you can tell like he gets sensory overloaded He is like almost like a low functioning autistic child. It seems that way like he cannot regulate his emotions He is highly aggressive But he is very loving towards who he knows. Yeah, he's known as a puppy. You know, yeah, and that's just it I mean if it can happen, let me if hulio was a human. What would he be?
Starting point is 01:07:43 Yeah, he'd be institutionalized. Yeah, probably. Yeah We'd get that call. Yeah. Oh my god. So thank god. He's not a human You know, but we love him. What would what would goby be? Oh, goby would be regular very gen pop kind of gal But she would be um homecoming princess. No, not the she's not the prettiest right She's had to build a personality. She's the friend. She's the girl at school. Right the best She's friends with the heavy meddlers and the fucking um the band. Yeah, and the jocks. Yeah, and she goes to all the parties Yeah, like everyone likes but nobody wants to fuck her not necessarily exactly. Okay. That's what
Starting point is 01:08:21 Um remi what would remi be remi is like, um, tommy lee jones Grumpy exactly like tommy lee jones. That is exactly like tommy lee jones grumpy grumpy as fuck But like you like him still and you like every good actor. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, good actor But he's tiny remi's tiny. Yeah, he has a tommy lee jones stubs Stubs is like, um, chris farley. No beloved. No goofy No, who what do you think? Just the kids that like ride the yellow bus the little bus No way
Starting point is 01:08:56 Stubs is the sweetest kindest most submissive. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, I mean drooling and just but beloved Beloved. Yeah, all the people love him. All right. We have a short bus kid You know, we have our own, um, we call him our I wish I was nicer to some kids at school like there was a kid right who um He was in a wheelchair and his mouth was always open, right and um Um, what do you mean? Just yeah. What do you mean what just if if if you're about to say you put shit in his mouth Yeah, but can I let me finish?
Starting point is 01:09:33 Okay, kids used to put grass in his mouth That's fucked up. It's fucked up, right and you didn't do and I would dig it out with my finger. Oh good But I would replace them with skittles And candy but he couldn't taste it And it would always come down his mouth and I would do it like, you know, here's something flavorful But I think I did it as a funny thing too. And I think that's wrong. It is wrong. Yeah, but I dug it out I dug out the dirt though. You did. Yeah. Yeah, it's choking hazard That's true. But I back in the day. We didn't care about stuff like that. Yeah, you guys
Starting point is 01:10:06 Give me that was like a non 70s 80s probably so fucking brutal if you were like a disabled kid It was bully central back in that. Yeah, there was no woe culture You could do whatever you want. Yeah, you could like if someone had spinal before you could walk like them next to him You know, man, all good, right and smile, right? I mean, I would like at the prom I would like dance next to them And just do fucking moves that they can't do you know, I mean And they just be with their things like, you know, that's really funny, man, you know, I mean, I would break dance, you know, I mean Yeah, but I was but back then that was cool. I was at this
Starting point is 01:10:37 Hey culture is different. Yeah now you can't do it. I was bad I forget what the bar was called. I want to say it was like elephant bar or is there's like this bar in arcadia Yeah, it's like a small like Kind of hole in the wall, but there was like a little dance floor and there was a really like Cute boy in like a wheelchair and I danced with them all night. He was popping wheelies and we made out and everything you made out with them Yeah Popping wheelie you pop wheelies. I was so impressed by his ability. Was he Mexican like a cholo? He wasn't he was mexican, but he wasn't do you have hydraulics on
Starting point is 01:11:07 This out bro. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, he was really like cute and he was like so fun and I was just like, all right, you know Like I like seeing that guy with no legs skateboard I haven't seen him. Yeah, that's dope dude. You figure it out You know what I mean, but when they fall it's not as brutal Mike is no legs can be broken Yeah, when they that's another thing because sometimes what you see like, um No, I'm just saying if you watch like, um They have internal organs too, you know, I know but when the people bail and stuff like when they're doing a rail and stuff
Starting point is 01:11:42 They break their legs and stuff like that and he doesn't have he does that's not a part of his thinking Yeah, but he's a legs already broken They're gone But he still has a skull he can fracture arms. He can break organs that can internally bleed Make can I make an argument though? Yeah, right because he has no legs, right? His arms right are super muscular. Felipe newness. There we go. Here we go. There's a couple of them. Yeah This guy's pretty good though Yeah, this makes me feel like a useless sack of shit. Yeah, look at that. That's beautiful. That's incredible. That's incredible. Look at him
Starting point is 01:12:15 Look, he a normal guy would have broke his leg just now But it seems like he just has a bka like below the knee amputation Yeah, I mean, I say he still has thigh. He still has a femur. He's oh you did a flip there, dude Look, check that out. He's incredible. He's incredible, dude That's so cool. That's so cool. I would do that Yeah, you should just do that. Now. Could you do it with no arms? Oh, well, there's a makeup artist. Can you look him up? He's a makeup artist with no arms. Oh, oh my god. Oh, and he does incredible makeup. There's no way. He does. There's no way
Starting point is 01:12:49 He's a star. Oh, let's see Oh He's a star. I'm telling you this kid is incredible. I'm looking for him. Don't worry. Yeah Wow, Felipe. It's like that professional photographer who's blind You know that right? There's a documentary. No, there's a HBO documentary about him He he's a photographer that's blind and I love it. It's like I do what you your heart says But I'm not gonna buy any of your photographs. There's no way I want to see his photograph. All right, you'll see it's just like accidental shins. Okay. Look at this person
Starting point is 01:13:23 Okay, there's no way dude. Stop. Stop. Stop. Stop. Look how incredible his makeup is. I swear to you, Bobby Yeah, but how long does it take? Three days the precision that this kid can do. Yeah, it's about timing though It's like imagine being on set Right. Look, look, look, look. Right. Imagine being on set. They're like the table. Wow You have a 5 a.m. Call time, right at 6 p.m. You're still not ready because of this guy Right think about it. He can't work on star trek He can't work with prosthetics
Starting point is 01:13:56 Do you think he could? Yeah him just coming up with us With his mouth. He's kind of like a ball prosthetic and it is wobbling up to the table and then he He puts the prosthetic on your head And you're just kind of like can somebody uh his makeup is great. That's no, it's great. Kobe. Helen. You don't have a video Uh, because I want to prove Bobby wrong. Yeah, let me let me I think he's a lot more able than you think No, I'm proud of him. He's great. What's his name again? His name is Gabe Wheatley Yeah, it's great because it's like at least for me like I can't do a wing liner to save my life
Starting point is 01:14:32 Like I'm horrible with makeup. So when I see people with so much precision It's like I'm always blown away. Let me ask you based on that's him. Yeah, could I just ask a question? Yeah, is he gay? I don't know Look at the photos. I don't know. Yes. There's a whole vlog with him and his boyfriend. Oh cute. All right. That's kinky But I learned something from from dr. Drew on trash tuesday. I just got half hard kinky Go ahead. I learned something from dr. Drew. Um on trash tuesday. Okay, here's the guy working. Yeah, here we go. Here we go That's him. Yeah He's doing the bronzer. Oh my god, that's gonna take oh my god
Starting point is 01:15:14 Yeah, it's gonna oh he does himself. He doesn't do other people. He does tutorials, sweetie. Oh, I see. Okay But that's yeah, that's good. Can I just say this though? Could you push pause for a second? And I I I I don't want to be mean and proud of them But there are cuts Why are you critiquing? I'm not critiquing him. I'm just saying you think it's not a full thing There's a cut. So there could be three hour Love your take bad. No, there could be three hour moments in there, right where he's trying to get it ready That's all I'm saying
Starting point is 01:15:51 Right, don't cut it and then maybe I'll be impressed That's all I'm saying. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. You're entitled to that. Yeah, it's just I'm proud of them, right? But it's like I want to see no edit. Yeah, I see I see what you're saying. Thank you Wow, so that but oh stop stop from makeup to that Right, it could have taken a week Oh, what is he doing here? You know classic how he's doing like a costume. Oh my god. Wow. That's great so many cuts though
Starting point is 01:16:26 bro Also, could you push pause for a second right right? Can I just say this? I just can't you just take a bowl For that first paint the first base Dip your just the base just dip your whole face in the bowl and then put the accents right Yeah, I mean just do that some valid makeup. Yeah, there's got to be life hacks Right. Ross is very impressive. Yeah, it's very impressive though. It's very good Okay, good. I'm proud of him. That's great. All right. Well, but he's not gonna do he's not gonna get hired in a movie
Starting point is 01:16:58 No, probably like as a consultant As a what to be like? Hey, I have like, you know different looks no No, the only consultant he can do is with other people with no arms and legs Because if he was at a real makeup place and he goes well, this is how you do it No, that's not how you do it because we have hands We're not going to use our shoulder to do that thing I I don't want to be a dick. I don't want to be a dick. I'm not being big but let's be real I think she means consultant and like
Starting point is 01:17:27 Look, it's not how to do it. It's like the skateboarder with no legs teaching able people how to kick flip Well, this is how you kick you take your knobs and you got to You got to push your nub. I go. I don't have nubs. I have legs It's all I'm saying. Okay. It's not a mean thing. No, no, I see where you're saying but what I'm not trying to be mean I love what they're doing. I know but what I meant as being a consultant is he Consult what with other people with no arms and legs. No Different makeup looks like I think for this scene. She should have like, uh, you know, like glitter eyes or this line Her like consultant that way not consult how to do makeup. And then how bad would he feel?
Starting point is 01:18:06 He's Think of the thing thinking, right? This is how bad he would feel, right? So I think he'd be glitter eyes and you know and this this right and then the makeup the student is doing it, right? She does it in 30 seconds and he's probably going that takes me six hours No So it's not good It's gonna ruin them So don't do consult it. Okay. Yeah, but I love the fucking teak talk. I'll follow it, right? And it's great. Okay. Yeah, I'm just you know, I
Starting point is 01:18:41 I love it And I'm so supportive and my heart flutters for these people, you know, when I see people you mean, you know, I mean Use what they have right and they make it their best and make it their own or do things that are better than I could ever Okay, could you skate like Um, Felipe. No, I do makeup like a not in this lifetime. I suck at that stuff. I could argue the point, but let's move on with the makeup
Starting point is 01:19:11 Okay. Yeah, I could yeah, I could argue that but you know, there's no way to prove it Okay. Yeah, but let's just say even at that to be positive. Yeah. Yes. You couldn't do it I couldn't okay. Let's be positive. I don't have the vision but the kickflip you're right Even if I didn't have legs Right, and I wouldn't be able to do what he's doing Yeah, most people can't yeah. Yeah, so let's do that to be clear. He does have half of his legs still Let me ask you what the blind photographer though Oh, okay. I that I'm kind of a little bit more confused about look at it
Starting point is 01:19:41 It did he was he a seeing person at one point and then he became like a non-seeing person. No I don't even know what I don't because I tell you what what I tell you what's going on He does do great photographs, but somebody else is going. He's taking 10,000 photos and one of them A guy goes I think this is good Oh, so he takes the photos. Yeah, he's a photographer. So he's just randomly, you know what I mean? I hope I got something Yeah, yeah, yeah, so me he goes by like feel Yeah, it's like it's like that Sebastian
Starting point is 01:20:17 Yeah, like that Sebastian mono skull go as a old stand-up joke where it's like back in the 80s when you would go to see Seaworld and see shamu pop up and you had those disposable cameras and you took it here and you think to yourself I hope I got that Yeah, it's the same kind of thing. I hope I got it. Yeah. Yeah, yeah But um, I'm going to say this If I had a wedding he probably wouldn't be the guy that I would ask to shoot my wedding You know what I mean? It's like god, there's so many photos of the sky and
Starting point is 01:20:49 The trees or it's artistic and yeah, yeah, and this these 15 of these are blurry Because I guess he was moving but like it's nothing you know, I mean, so I wouldn't hire him for that. Would you Would you hire a blind photographer to do your wedding? I mean if like he shows me like his portfolio and I'm like, oh my god That's incredible. How it's how it's incredible. I don't understand you understand it by what I just said He took 90,000 photos and these are the eight that are actually clear and there's someone telling him. Hey, that's good Or do you think he just knows no, there's no how do you know? you're blind
Starting point is 01:21:28 You're looking at all the what do you call it the uh negatives or what are you but what about that guy who has echolocation Uh, they're going like that And he has a lot of pictures and he makes a picture and he paints a photo. Yeah, and he can ride a bike He can drive he can do all of these things just by he has the same thing that dolphins have which is like an artist No, but he's just like a What is the blind photographer? First of all, there's here's a list of actually blind photographers and their portfolios
Starting point is 01:21:55 Okay, it's what Pete is probably the most famous when he says I didn't take photography seriously until I went totally blind When I get out of taking photos the event not the picture builds a bridge between my mind's eye and their vision of my work. In case you people refuse to believe that I am blind, I am a visual person. I just can't see. Okay, so it's the correct term is sighted and non-sighted. And that's his. Yeah. She just can't see, but he's visual. Okay, that's a beautiful photo. You know. That is all these. Give me another one. All these guys. Okay, the city one. Well, some of these guys. Okay, let me ask you another question. I'm so sorry. I don't want to be rude, right? It would be impressive if you went by yourself.
Starting point is 01:22:34 I don't know their process. Dude, it's this. If I was a blind photographer, I would bring you and I'd be like, Gil. Yeah. What's up? What am I pointing at? Right now you're looking at the a tree, but you're trying to get the Statue of Liberty. Okay. Like how far is the Statue of Liberty? Five clicks to the right. Like this. You got it, baby. I have it. Click. That one's blurry. Okay. Click. You need to keep focusing. You're just holding the camera. Can you do the focusing thing? Yeah. I don't know which one that is. And go ahead. Is it focused? Yeah. Click. We got it. I got it. Got it. Yeah. But see you so much. I know, but that's, I mean, you have to have someone near you, right? Listen, I'm saying it's beautiful, right? But why can't somebody go question it a
Starting point is 01:23:28 little bit? But that's what I'm saying. Like, okay, he could be like, you know what, this is, this is what I want, right? Like if he does photo shoots, say for instance, he was like, I need the lighting and he describes it to them and he has assistance do that. And I also need, he still has a vision. Okay. He just doesn't have sight. Here I go. Here I go. Okay. What am I doing actors? I'm the model. I'm just be like, Hey, you know, I'm hiring you. I really want to take new headshots, but I want them to be a little bit like edgy kind of rock and roll with a little bit of a retro vibe or rock and roll. Oh, what are you wearing right now? Oh, well, I'm just in my pajamas. I'm calling you from home. Okay. That's weird question.
Starting point is 01:24:11 No, because I know any business. Oh, you're not here with I'm on the phone. Oh, I thought you were in the room. That was wild. You're canceled. But that even that, even that baby, even if the thing, if you're on speakerphone, if he's on speakerphone, he could think that she's in the room. All right, well, you ready to go? What do you mean? I'm in Portland right now. I'm flying in tomorrow. Oh, my bad. And I will yell at you, my assistant, don't put on speaker. I thought you could hear that. Yeah, but you hearing is more heightened. You should know. I know. Yeah. Oh, yeah, they're like Daredevil. That's good. They're like Daredevil. Maybe they're there's more of a heightened thing. Another. Yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 01:24:48 But I would have to like, but if like a person was in my photography studio, you would have an assistant set up or do I am I holding the camera? Yeah, because and then a great photographer is always going to set the mood just be like, okay, think about this. I want to know what it's like. All right. You know, like Jen Rosenstein, say for instance, like the reason like she made it so great, we should be like Kalyla now, think this, feel this. Now, like, look at me when you feel this and I give it. But here's the problem with that. If I go, all right, this one, be angry, right? And you do this. You smile. And then I'm going to be like, good.
Starting point is 01:25:29 Good. And then I go, and then I go, hey, hey, hey, hey, she's smile. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then you'd be like, so I'm like, we got it. Good. Right. Go ahead. She smiled. She smiled. She smiled. Yeah. Do it again. But mean, angry. Ready? Click. Click. All right. She smiled again. What are you doing, lady? It's yeah, it's too much. It's too much already. Already too much. All right. So think of it that. So what I'm saying is that I believe you're poking all the holes. You are poking the holes in this. Right. It's like, how about this? A deaf composer. That's different. That's what about Beethoven? How was that? How was that? Vibrations is a whole. Beethoven. Vibrations. Beethoven also couldn't hear at one point.
Starting point is 01:26:15 Yeah. Yeah. But he heard before. He was. Yeah. He did hear before. Yeah. Yeah. If you hear before, that's one thing. If you saw before, that's one thing. But if you're born completely deaf, right? And you're like, I don't want to do the impression. Let's not. Yeah. Yeah. Let me try. Okay. Give it a try. Hey. Hey. Does that sound good? What's up? Is it offensive? I wrote a piece on the piano. Let's hear it. All right. Here we go. Is it like Mozart? It depends who you ask. See. But here's what you just said there. I couldn't hear it anyway. Can you stop? Can you just stop with these scenarios? Just stop. What are we doing here? I'm going to hell. Am I going to hell? I'm just exploring different
Starting point is 01:27:18 ideas. Exploring. I'm just exploring different ideas. And I'm just trying to like, you know. You're really in the. Yeah. I'm just trying to question it. You know what I mean? That's all. You know, Bobby's first. Yeah. I really want to like get to get behind it. You know, you know, I get what you're saying. Thank you so much. I didn't want to get what I'm saying is what I'm saying. But if anyone of those people are listening to this, you know what I mean? I'm so proud of you to go for it. I love it. And I'll buy your artwork and all that stuff. I'm just saying it would be a difficult thing. That's all I'm saying. There's challenges in that. Yeah. You know what I mean? But I think no one is more aware of their limitations than the people
Starting point is 01:27:52 with the limitations. But I think it's just kind of cool when they like exceed our abilities when with all those limitations. What do you mean? Okay, we're done. No, I want to know what you mean. You've spent 40 minutes talking about this. No, no, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You do know what she means. No, I don't know what you mean. I want to know what you mean. I want to know what you mean. I want to know what you mean. I think it's incredibly like impressive when someone can have physical limitations and still exceed my ability at photography, makeup and skateboarding. But it's something that you would still not know unless you had those disabilities.
Starting point is 01:28:31 Like in your head, you're like, oh, I couldn't do that if I wasn't born with that, those limbs or whatever, right? But you could have too, because you're not, but you're not in that situation. Okay. One of my favorite movies of all time is My Left Foot. Oh, I know. All right. And Daniel Day-Lewis, have you seen My Left Foot? Daniel Day-Lewis, I think it was his first movie, and he played a guy who has, I don't know what it is, so I could only physically describe it. Cerebral palsy? Yeah, I think cerebral palsy. Yeah, cerebral palsy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Maybe that's not good. But, um, and he, the whole, is a painter who only painted with his left foot. Right? Yeah. But that you can still do because he sees what he's doing, right? He's processing,
Starting point is 01:29:15 you know what I mean? And, you know, right? Yeah, I think that there should be a sequel to My Left Foot. My Right Foot? You should be the star of it. I'll do My Right Foot. For different reasons than cerebral palsy. I know what it is. My Right Foot, right? And I'm paralyzed from the neck down. Okay, but check it out. This is a good movie. Paralyzed from the neck down, right? But for some reason, I was bored. Imagine my right leg looks like. Usain Boltz. No, even better. My right leg is like when Bruce Banner changes. The Hulk leg. It's like mid-range. Hang on. So if you had a gigantic green muscular leg, that'd be weird. Too much, too much, too much. Let's go between there, right? And I was just a baby. And you know what I mean? And look at opening shot,
Starting point is 01:30:01 right? Yeah, he's, you know, paralyzed from the neck down, right? He's blind and deaf, right? But look at that right leg. Can I have a question? You do have a question? I do. You have a question for that. Yeah, this is a good movie. Can I have a question? This is a good movie. What? So is the rest of your body just like limp except your right leg? But so you get up, you just do this, and then your body? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Your body kind of follows? Right, it follows it. But the rest of your body is still hanging, but you're walking with a limp body. Yeah, how about this? No, no, how about this? Your left leg works as well. Because in this movie, I have to have my left work. You'll go see why. You'll see why, right? But everything else, right?
Starting point is 01:30:45 I can't feel, right? And I have like, you know, the same thing that Daniel Day-Lewis had, cerebral palsy, okay? And you cut to 20 years later, and you cut to a karate tournament. Oh, God, dude. Quite cranky. Cranky. Is there a cranky? But it's so powerful. You're fighting Johnny Lawrence? No, it's so powerful. It literally just knocks the head off of people. I'm talking like the fucking, you know, my right foot, dude. What do you think? My right foot. Yeah, that's a sequel. Somebody write it. Somebody write that movie. Someone make the poster. Someone make the poster for this. I don't know the relationships or, you know what I mean, how he gets to the tournament. But he gets there. Yeah, he gets there. Did the kumite. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you would have to
Starting point is 01:31:32 have flashback scenes, you know what I mean? Of me kicking a soccer ball right into the net, and it breaks the net, right? Imagine, right? It breaks the net, right? I get mad at my dad for not getting me a fucking PlayStation. So I kick a wall, but then the whole wall falls. Like you would have a montage. But it's like one punch man, but like one kick man. One kick man. One kick man. Yeah, yeah. But I like the title. How about my right foot, one kick man. Right? You combine both of them, right? Think about it. I think it's a good movie. Yeah. So what make the poster for that, please? Right. And then he falls in love. Oh, God, there's a love arc. There's a love story. Should there not be? I mean, they can. Yeah. And maybe a blind photographer. Wow. As a love interest.
Starting point is 01:32:15 And then she just takes pictures of his left leg. He always, she always fucks up. You know what I mean? Not my left leg. You know what I mean? It's my right leg. Right? Well, you're not telling me what you know what I mean? Where to shoot? Something like that. It gives it levity. It gives the movie levity. Oh, there isn't levity already in the entire press. No, it's fucking like fucking dramatic. It's not funny at all. Like when the head when he chups heads off, traumatized. Traumatized. Yeah. Parents like, what the fuck? You know what I mean? You can't have a guy. You know what I mean? With a fucking mutant right leg. My son's dead. Oh, we'll have those scenes. You know what I mean? Right? Anyway, thanks for listening. Bye, guys. Bye, everyone.
Starting point is 01:33:22 Hey, prime members, you can listen to Tiger barely ad free on Amazon music, download the Amazon music app today, or you can listen ad free with Wondry plus in Apple podcast. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondry.com slash survey.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.