TigerBelly - Episode 100: A Family Affair
Episode Date: July 19, 2017We take a look back at the beginning, the middle, and tie some loose ends. We make some unsuccessful phone calls (because all you muhfuckas stayed slept) and celebrate 100 hours of chaotic fa...mily love. Thank you for sticking around. Instagram: tigerbelly |Â Twitter: @thetigerbellySee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Five, four, three, two, one.
Hey everybody, guess what?
What?
Nothing, nothing.
Hey everybody, guess what?
What?
Doing it my way.
Hey everybody, guess what?
What?
Qingcheng, Qingcheng.
Hey everybody, guess what?
What?
100 episodes.
Wow.
100 episodes, ladies and gentlemen.
Wow.
And I am so excited to be here.
I think I'm lying.
I think there's a lot of pressure on me right now.
Why?
I feel just overwhelmed with all the stress because, you know, I feel like people think
that the 100 episodes supposed to be like magical or something, but it's not going to
be.
Oh, come on.
It's just going to be what it is.
Come on.
Okay.
And I want to say this to you, all of you in the room and outside of the world, may peace
enter your heart, may joy and serenity seep inside your eyes so that you may see the light.
And I appreciate all of you listeners.
May God be with you.
And I've been reflecting a lot about us as a group, as a family, as an army, and I'm
the captain.
I just want to throw that out there.
And Slup King and Urban Bobby, all that stuff.
But, you know, we all met in different times and there's an origin to this podcast.
There's a mythology to it.
And I'd like to talk about how we all met and how this podcast got started.
And I know a lot of people that have been listening to us over the last year, you kind
of know, but fuck it, we're doing it anyway.
And I would like to start off with the way I met George.
You met George before me, huh?
I did.
Yeah.
So you've known George longer than...
What happened was when they were starting Maker Studios, I came in and they wanted to
sign me up to do videos and stuff and I came in and they said, what about this, Taraka,
all these people as producers and I could see one guy raise his hand and go, I want
to do it.
But he had this Timothée McVeigh vibe to it, like, does this guy has a U-Haul and he looked
like he had a U-Haul and he was like making bombs.
You look like he had a U-Haul.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He still looks like he has a U-Haul.
Honestly, when I first met you at George, I was like, anyone but him.
Like I'll take you into the gardener.
I do not want him.
Just based on appearance.
And I sensed it, too.
Energy, appearance, skin color, all of it.
I'm like, I can't do it.
And then like a couple of months, you do some videos and people leave, Taraka is doing this,
Mickey is gone.
All these people leave, right?
And then through just the years, George was left.
Persistence breaks persistence.
Yeah, that's true.
And the reason why I like him now is because you can tell that he's into it.
And he has changed our lives for the better.
He's helped my brother out immensely.
And I hated you, but I think there's a little love there now.
So I met George and then I met Kalaila off a tinder.
And let's be real.
Let's not like hide.
We're open.
It's real.
What can I paint you, the scenario of how I swiped left, how I swiped left.
I was actually in bed with a boy named Kal.
I remember him.
Really?
Yeah.
I met him.
You met him?
Yeah.
So I was having, you know, I, at this point in my life.
I've always wondered because like Bobby lives up here and you were living down at Long Beach.
So I was like, either her range was set to really far.
Or she was near here somehow.
No, no, no.
Her range is far.
I was like 27, so he lied about his age.
Because I was only searching up until 40.
So I was going, I think my range was like 32 to 40.
That's what I'm doing wrong.
That's exactly what you're doing.
You have to lie on the fucking thing.
You're 22.
Remember?
Yeah.
So he lied and said he was 37.
Yeah.
Nice.
Can you let the dog in?
Yeah, let the dog in.
And at this point in my life, I had just, you know, been having like casual like hookups
with guys.
So I'd been seeing this guy for like two months.
A meathead.
A meathead.
But he's thick.
Like a thick, bulky.
Bodybuilder.
Young.
Young.
22.
Think Bane with no mask.
Oh, OK.
Like kind of a big, thicker white dude.
Yeah.
And he was young, 22 years old.
Yeah.
Young dick.
Played baseball.
That young dick.
That young dick.
Yeah, yeah.
And like there's a little acne in it.
Right?
It's going so young.
It's a little deeper voice.
It's starting to change.
Squeaky voice.
Squeaky come.
Yeah.
Squeaky.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
And I think that we had just finished hooking up, going through Tinder because I really didn't
care about him that much and I think that I was very clear with him that I wanted nothing
more than just, you know, physical relationship.
And so I saw Bobby's name and I even turned, I was probably naked and I put my, I showed
him my phone.
I was like, oh my God, look who it is.
I'm going to swipe left.
I swipe right.
I mean.
Is that good?
Right's good.
Right's good.
Right's good.
I didn't swipe left.
I didn't swipe right.
Of course.
Wow.
Kaki Motherfucker.
Wow.
You see us soon.
Okay.
Hold on.
I'm telling you.
Because let me say this.
I didn't think that you would have swiped right.
That's where I was.
Yeah.
I'm like, there's no way about it.
No.
Because I know how men.
I'll give it a shot.
I've seen men Tinder.
They just swipe right at everything.
They don't discriminate.
I'm scared.
I think women are a little bit more selective.
Oh, are you?
Oh, yeah, dude.
And so.
My dick is so dead.
It's got to be complex pussy for me to fucking hard, bro.
And so that's how it was.
I showed it to him and then we matched and I was like, oh my God, Cal, look who I matched
with.
And he was like, wow, that's crazy.
And yeah, fucking the sky.
Yeah.
That was the beginning of it.
And then I remember meeting Cal at your one of your birthday parties at the karaoke.
We're still friends now.
Yeah.
So I saw him and I could tell that he was like with her kind of like with me.
I know, but he was there.
And you know that sex with him.
Right.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I knew that there was something there.
He was cute, right?
He was really cute.
Yeah.
And I'm just like, I don't want to compete with the fuck this shit.
Fuck it.
Fuck this.
And then she broke up with me on Facebook once.
Oh, how do you skip to that?
I go from there to there.
She broke up with me on Facebook.
She broke up with me on Facebook.
Within two months, no, within a month of dating him.
I don't want to get into it because it's going to be personal.
No, it's not.
But within a month of dating him, I had some like weird symptoms and I went to go get a
CT scan and they found a mass in my lungs that was a huge mass in my lungs.
And in my head, I was like, I remember when the doctor told me the news, she was like,
Hey, it doesn't look good.
This is what's going on.
And in my head, I was like, Oh my God, I have lung cancer and I'm only 27 years old.
I was like, how did this happen?
But then, so I had just started seeing him three weeks into it.
So I was like, I don't want to get into a relationship with anyone like I want to focus
on like feeling better.
I just assumed it was something bad.
So I over Facebook, I was like, Hey, so yeah, I don't want to see you anymore.
Yeah.
It was crazy.
Yeah.
And I rarely check my Facebook too.
So I don't even know how I got it.
And then he was like, Are you crazy?
I don't care if you're not like, if you're sick or whatever, turn out to be benign.
Thank God.
But that's how, yeah.
And then can we move on beyond you and me?
No.
We're still at you and me.
Yeah.
And then what happened after that was then when did we commit though?
Uh, January.
No, no, no.
We committed already verbally, but we, here's how I know though that I think, Oh, you're
a piece of shit.
This makes me angry.
This is how I know.
I go, this is the right one because I did the worst thing you could possibly do.
Why?
And she still stayed with me.
I announced, I announced her abortion on David Chil's podcast while she was at the
abortion clinic.
That's your litmus for knowing that she's the one.
Yeah.
And when she didn't break up with me, I'm like, she's the one.
She stayed in it because that's a lot of bullshit you have to deal with.
Oh God.
The internet.
Yeah.
I told my brother, I go, dude, the relationship is like what, how much bullshit the other
one can take.
And she, she has a threshold for bullshit.
Like a deep chasm.
It's huge.
Yeah.
It's huge because of the kind of shit that I do is like unbearable.
You go deep.
I go so deep and she's just like, I'm going to have to let it go.
This is what it is.
Right.
So that's how I know.
And then how'd you meet Gilbert Kalila?
Let's not, um, before we, I even met you.
You guys already did something together.
Right.
So, um, in a podcast without my permission, he goes on David shows podcast and he says,
yeah, my girlfriend now needs two dicks to come.
So he tells a story about how I remember that how previously that was really creepy the way
he said that.
Why did you say miles before?
Can we talk about that?
Fucking gross.
Oh my God.
What I just saw.
I saw it too.
His face got red.
And happy.
I remember that.
She saw it.
It's so gross.
By the way, guys, we have Dorothy at our greatest tiger belly fan joining us today.
She was handpicked.
Handpicked.
Um, so yes, um, he goes on a podcast and he's like, my girlfriend needs two dicks to
come.
I remember that.
Oh yeah.
It was really fun.
And then that's kind of where the whole, uh, world of podcast, that's where the seed
was planted in my head because I, Bobby's like, you know what?
Why don't you come on the show and tell your story and sort of defend yourself?
I went on this, on David's shows podcast, didn't defend myself.
I ended up expanding on the story and fucking myself over, but, and I got so much like internet
vitriol from that.
Like this girl's a sociopath.
She knew, you know, she needs, she's basically, because I had a polyamorous relationship before
I was the fucking spawn of, of, of Satan basically, right?
Yeah.
And like her Tinder profile said, wonder, I didn't say I would never put, you know, that's
some basic bitch shit.
You put white girl, wonder, yeah, she did, no, I would never put, you know how I know
you?
Because I had to ask you, what's Wunderlust?
I did not.
That's not what my bio anyway, it did, but let's move on.
Fact.
Move on.
It's a fact, but move on.
Wunderlust USA.
Was I a Bostic bitch?
Yeah.
Yeah.
You said Wunderlust.
Jesus.
So, um, we went on the podcast and that's when the idea of even, I never even understood
like the world of podcasting and then, and we did that.
I was like, Oh, maybe we can down the road.
This is something that I would be interested in, in not doing for myself, but even like
producing or being a part of.
So then she one day said, I want to do one.
I didn't want to do one because I was going to do them with fat black, Eric Griffin, Eric
Griffin, fat black and Eric and I went to all things comedy even had a meeting with
his son, you guys up right now and then he had went on the road.
I did.
And then we just never did it.
We just, you know, you just, you live your life and just never did it.
And then she's like, I want to do one and I want her to do one.
She want to do an all girls one.
I think that was eventually the plan, maybe her, ASSA, some other people.
So we went to, I remember going to the guitar center to get some of this stuff.
Remember?
No, we had a smaller mic for myself.
Yeah.
I would attach a mic to the computer on garage band and there were no tables and I would
just record and I recorded 10 episodes, some with myself and some with Bobby.
And after the 10th, 11th episode, we, you know, we thought like, this is so bad.
Well, no, we thought, let's just do it for real.
We're going to do it.
And then I met you, Gilbert during a fight.
We had a fight.
Jenna, Jenna invited you.
Pacquiao fight.
Jenna invited you without my permission.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I'm like, who the fuck is this butterfly of a fucking Filipino bastard?
You came flying in the room as if you fucking own the place.
Also I know what I wore now.
I know why you say that.
Yeah.
Because why does he think I was so gay?
I wore the tightest pants.
He was so gay.
Yeah.
I'm like, wow, who's this fucking wanderlust gay dude?
It's not just a wanderlust, now that you guys can't use a wanderlust.
I mean, dude, I swore to God, I thought that you were a full-blown cum juggler.
You know what?
I know basically, based on my extra small H&M shirt.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was crazy.
And I go, is he nice?
And then he's like, he's a comedian or he's a sketch guy.
I'm like, no.
There's no way.
Come juggler.
Come juggler.
And then when we did this and you said that we needed an engineer or somebody to help us,
you volunteered, right?
Yeah.
So she asked me at Priscilla's coffee.
Well we had tried recording just you and I and the computer crashed, everything went
to shit and a whole hour had been lost.
So I was thinking to myself, you know, who can do this?
And then Jenna was like, hey, Gilbert's really good with computers.
That's all she said.
Liar.
Yeah.
But she's also shitty with computers, so me being good at computers, like helping her
with email.
Yeah.
Right.
So I was like, hey, do you want to just sit in as a third person and just watch the program
run and make sure it's running while we talk?
Yeah.
And then I was just hit stop.
Yeah.
Hit start and then hit record.
Why did you want to do that?
Well, she asked me just like, can you?
But why did you want to do it though?
Honestly?
Yeah.
I get to meet Bobby Lee.
Well, that feels good.
And that's the real.
I didn't even know she was dating you and then Jenna was like, oh yeah, she's dating
like this cook.
First of all, Jenna didn't know who you are.
Idiot.
She's like.
What?
Yeah, Jenna knows who I am.
No, that time?
Yeah.
I'll show you why.
Because when I first met her was at the comedy store years ago and when I first met her,
I thought she was cute.
What?
Yeah.
But then she opened her mouth.
You wonder what?
She opened her mouth.
Right.
And I'm like, oh, shit.
Wonderless bitch.
Yeah.
She was wonderful.
She was wonderful.
Yeah.
And so I'm like, no.
So she knew I was because I'm friends with Esther Pavinsky.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So they're friends.
So then, um, but then when you did the podcast, I think I thought, oh, this guy's funny.
He kind of knows what he's doing.
And I think it didn't take that long for me to go.
He just should be a part of it.
Yeah.
So I had met him.
We met at a coffee shop for the first time even before you met Gilbert, sweetie.
And I remember I was wearing pajama pants and looking like pretty disastrous.
Wonderlust.
Wonderlust.
Yeah.
And he, he basically roasted me at a coffee shop.
He's like, who the hell are you?
What are you wearing?
Yeah.
I was like, really?
I was making fun.
I'll make fun of all Jenna's friends.
They're all like hippies.
Yeah.
You look homeless.
I look homeless.
I saw you.
I love it.
I'm gonna be kinda dude in my, my, kinda...
How did McVeigh get involved though?
Timothy McVeigh?
Timothy McVeigh got involved.
No, he didn't, his cousin left, left a comment on one of our, I emailed Bobby and he didn't
respond to that.
Of course he did.
Yeah, never.
Yeah.
You should know then, nope.
Yeah.
I know.
Nope.
So Bryce left a comment...
Oh, Bryce did.
...and tagged George.
Oh.
Why aren't you working on this on one of our Tiger belly Instagram photos?
Woo.
with yet George why aren't you because I had met George once a maker and I knew
that you know well I know I responded up if they're ever having a hunger games
for who can be Gilbert's assistant I'm in oh that's right and I was like Bryce is
this clever enough is this right enough will this will this get their
attention you were willing to be Gilbert's assistant I remember that oh my
god anything to get in the foot in the door and Gilbert learned on the job how
to yeah cuz that other guy you guys I'm not gonna say his name the other guy you
guys had before we had another guy yeah who is it I come on tell me who it is
who oh yeah I remember him I had to learn everything from him which is right he
was the guy right was the guy something happened I know what happened something
happened a lot of things happen so I came in that's how it all happened that
guy's completely out of our lives I don't even thought about he's a great guy
I haven't talked to him in like two years I forgot about him yeah that's right
Alex he taught me everything what you're not taking that out no we're not
just no no we're not marking it it's not marking Bobby got it but he's a very
well you know what I'm gonna see his name 20 more times it's fine he's just a
he was very expensive and I know at that time we could not afford him and his
skills and my skills were free and even though they weren't probably very good
at that time we were like fuck it let's let's roll with Gilbert yeah you too
baby yeah so that's where and and now a hundred and we've had great guests I to
look back at who we had it pretty good we have had Jordan Stone Street Delia
Eric Griffin twice the Ovan was great we did run a zizi remember are she fear we
haven't aired that yet again are we Sunday night after this airs it is yeah
okay because if you don't air it he's gonna come after you okay what yeah he
has my number I know you understand do you understand what you're dealing with
here you think we all do yeah yes sir you're dealing with Bobby time stand no
it's not even work it's it's comedy mafia that's a good way of putting it it's
comedy mafia and you don't want to get on his bad side and that's why I've had
to behave the way I've behaved you understand yeah how to survive on my
friend true okay I think that we should take a quick second before we we finish
up with our origin story yeah to yeah to call a fan where he's a he's a Christian
pastor you want the Christian pastor you have a little heaven like finish it up
with a prayer for us perhaps okay let me get one question well do that while I
get okay what's what's what's this oh popping balloons and there's a there's a
question in the balloon yes give it to you put the balloon in there I'm the
question physics Adam T Chong on red it says oh it's for Gilbert oh geez just
do it anyway all right Gilbert tell me about your experience at second city
what are some of the most valuable at attributes as seen stilled on you through
a comedy and theater aspect well slept King Bobby some thick I'll tell you what
you want to do your craft right and it's like you got to be immersed no just
take classes do shows that's oh my god slept King Bobby yeah there we go is that
shit worth it what the second city and all that stuff I've always I've always
thought that comedy institutions are the way to go groundlings
groundlings second city because in this world where anyone can fucking pick up a
camera and do a sketch in their living room that's right that's what it's that's
what we argued about when you when you can get through the politics of an
institution and rise within that environment you're being vetted by
other people like the groundlings the people that pass you are other sketch
people that been around for hundreds of years so I think that yeah I'm gonna
just read that while it calls I'm like talking to people on the phone oh my
god Bobby we prepped you I'm a pastor and I just realized I don't like it I'm
a pastor in a Methodist Church in Albuquerque, New Mexico I've been
following Bobby Lee's career since on TV I love Tiger Belly is it calling yeah
calling oh shit I fucked up oh yeah pizza George you do what sorry
I'll do it again you you fuck you and this is yeah let's leave a message
pastor what pastor gill pastor gill gill does he know we were gonna call yeah
he submitted okay hello pastor gill this is Bobby Lee from the Tiger Belly
podcast you submitted your number to be on the hundredth episode and I find it
to be very rude that you didn't pick up your fucking phone that it's going
straight to a fucking voicemail dude I know check the fuck out for I know you
believe in the Lord and the Lord's on your side and you were the spirit you're
a spirit to a man okay I'm just leave it that's why but let me tell you some
fuck man I can't go fuck I'm sorry I'm I apologize a pastor sir we love you
pastor we love you pastor God but anyway sir I'm not I apologize because I know
you're with the Lord I'm sorry don't don't get the Lord give me cancer or
nothing I feel free I want to be free amen but amen but I just want to say
that it's a little rude that you put your number in and then now I'm back at
a voicemail and now we're not gonna call you back again because it's I can't do
it you know I mean but it's a fucking next time fucking just don't do it then
awesome ding dong ding dong who's first ding dong oh my brother's here
another gook I told you to throw it on my fucking face don't stop I'm gonna throw
the fucking scissors at you hey hey hey careful let's introduce everybody babe
all right we got right here we got long toe long long toe long toe is Callila
sister Quinda oh yes and she has really one toe that's so abnormally long that
I'm thinking about calling the Guinness Book of World Records because it is
really a sight to see so anyway sit down Quinda where George is yeah sit down
we're gonna have a little yeah yeah we'll do a circling chair kind of thing
okay we got Jenna is here Jessica is here we have Renzo long toes on boy
boyfriend he's a cop so don't fuck with us you will go to prison we got a
little Stevie we'll be my brother and that's that so put the headphones on
long toe hurry up long toe okay so long toe you you've never been on this
podcast before right oh once but then we didn't have video yet at that time oh
yeah yeah yeah well welcome thank you
you guys have to know something about long toe yeah yeah long toe along with
her boyfriend have they both have listened to every single one of our
episodes yeah so they're tiger belly experts so we're gonna go ahead and talk
about our favorites maybe our not so favorites but by doing so let's not hurt
anyone's feelings no no no yeah that's right right don't go extra coup was
terrible yeah yeah she annoyed everyone okay so give us give us a rundown of
of your not that I'm not saying that that's the case I'm gonna say I gave you
an example yeah her voice is makes me fucking go crazy once again Bobby
drop it yeah my favorite guest yeah I'm Theo von yeah most profound was probably
Eddie oh yeah last week yeah yeah that was great and Eric Stone Street you
like that one too he was just very candid you know yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
cuz you see him one way on screen but then you right and it's um you know
bringing these people into my home is difficult because a lot of these guys
are um and then you know I've been to their houses it's really nice and this
is a little better room college apartment but it's your college that is
true long toe and that you know what you get a fucking point for that that was a
fucking layup of a compliment and I really like that what other what other
highlights were there for you who do you think has the best chemistry with Bobby
of Eric Eric Eric Eric Griffin Cat black of course yeah whenever he's on the
show something comes out of you it's different it's it it's a different you
know why cuz there's a motion yeah no it's not it's not even friends it's like
an anger no I don't when I when we talk to each other sometimes I get a sore
throat and I want to take his fucking black titties and rip them off gee but
not in a friendly way oh in a friendly way in a nonviolent way there's love
behind it though you can tell it's pure love yeah like he's what he's the only
comic worry because Bobby I go what a rattlesnake bit me in the fucking
nutsack I need you to suck it out would you okay if he had consumption so what
do you mean consumption tuberculosis tuberculosis what do you do for their
consumption tuberculosis I mean like that right what is consumption it's what
Irish people had so what it comes out what do I need to do so all this
flim comes out yeah one way to help with the flim yeah suck the flim out of the
nose any or with my mouth yeah with your mouth that's really out of all the
years of medicine that's what they came up with back then yeah back then let's
say his nose was back back in like the little house in the prairie days yes
all right so we're in the 1700s we're roommates in a log cabin in the forest
you can't breathe I come in I have a raccoon yeah I have a dead raccoon I
just hunted yeah and I come in I go yo man sorry there's all we got to eat your
Bobby man I can't breathe what's the matter Eric
I got a consumption well you sound Mongolian right now yeah well what do I
do I need you to do one thing only what I need you to suck the mucus out of my
nose well and then you got to clean the plugs yeah I probably go listen man die
and leave but he can't breathe you wouldn't suck it out of his nose I don't
know I think he's gonna have to die if he was skinnier maybe but for some reason
because he is kind of big that there's I feel like there's more mucus I would do
that for my sister yeah I would Steve where Steve Steve he's gone Steve I'll
do it for neck right yeah Eric consumption no yeah but rattlesnake
bite on the nut sack yes for the story for the story yeah yeah and what other
highs and lows Coinda I mean long toe Bobby has a city job we have to protect
Bobby has a lot of words of wisdom okay what are your favorite life it's a
fantasy and when I have a bad day I tell myself that fantasy life is an
illusion no no fantasy life as a fantasy life as an allotment you know what's
kind of just says the re but I really do believe that that life is a fantasy and
the reason being is one time I was talking to my friend Joseph and he was
like you know what I do I wake up and I just imagine life as a movie through my
eyes and it just makes everything better all the experiences you know I mean
because it's just it is what it is you know my friend Joseph right
Rogan Joseph because we got a relationship but oh my god Joseph when I
go way back yeah Joseph Rogan thanks Joseph Rogan thank you for that word
of wisdom and I've applied it in my life that's all oh god your narcissism is
just I don't have oh here's another thing here's another thing I don't have
more narcissism than anyone else on planet Earth everyone is narcissistic
no but there's pathological narcissism and that's what you have I don't have
pathological narcissism I just have regular narcissism
okay that's all the way you just stood up right there classic narcissists hear me
roar everybody listen me right my friend JJ right oh god my friend JJ told me
that I don't have narcissism okay when I say JJ I mean Judd Apatow I call him
JJ what you're gonna say Abrams I don't I don't know JJ Abrams and see at
will narcissists admit to that oh god I have auditioned for him yeah didn't get
it okay so I what Star Trek I love Star Trek why did you audition for Star
Trek no they'll never give me anything so that those are your also who is your
least favorite guys no come on I'm honestly I mean if we were gonna go
there I'm Brian Callan was my least favorite
right right right no I mean he's funny I did some of you hardy-hardy harsh with
it was funny but but um you know what like they like it let her explain go
ahead it's I thought you were a narcissist but he takes it to a different
level and yeah shots fired and I'm just I'm just a little protective of my
sister so his the way he talked about her like oh you know what you've got a
good one here as if like she wasn't gonna be that otherwise like yeah the big
m word it's kind of misogyny is yeah it's a very funny guy very funny don't get
me wrong it was a really fun podcast I I just that was my least favorite out of
everyone really but sometimes people talk that way you know like my friend
dove he's not a star of David off okay when I was dating Sarah Highland a long
long time ago I was my girlfriend Sarah and he goes what's up woman
he kept calling her woman and I go that's East Coast East Coast no it's not East Coast it's just it's ignorant are you
not a woman yeah but the tone behind it how about that hey woman yeah there you
guys see how well what are you looking at man Renzo you gonna arrest me I didn't
commit any fucking laws bro you know what when you walk into a room do it as a
civilian you're a fucking civilian all right you're not a fucking cop in this
room with your like I like your energy right now like you're gonna arrest
everyone in the room we did not commit a fucking crime fuckface you know what
officer go fuck yourself I always want to say that to a police officer by the
way Stevie we be here Stevie we be here all right so this not out of your nose
if you were sick Steve your brother if you were sick and you couldn't breathe
that he would suck this not out of your nose I've never I'm not gonna get on the
mic I know you sit down everyone's gonna do it you fucking idiot all right all
right so what you mom what did what she's suck boogers out of my nose she
went when I was a kid oh why thank you Steve is great thank you and from this
yeah I appreciate you guys having us up but there's other people here stop stop
okay okay okay so you have your own situation with George yeah thank you
George but um you how do you how are you feeling about your place in Tiger
Belly history and also your situation with your show and everything it's like
not about me it's like I'm here to be of service to you guys and if people enjoyed
it they enjoyed it you know what I mean you've had some of the biggest episodes
are your numbers oh I'm Tiger Belly thank you and we've had big facts I appreciate
Lee is still up there you know you know but I uh I really respect what you guys
are doing every week because I'm starting to do that and I don't I'm just
realizing how much work it really takes to keep this shit going I don't know how
you guys reached a hundred because how many do we have 15 right yours is a lot
more labor-intensive because you actually do little raise world and you
yeah yeah it's a lot of work guys I don't know how you guys are doing it
yeah I love it though huh George well you would think they're gonna say this so
real quick yeah I want to argue with you yeah I'm not gonna argue with you okay
I'm not gonna try your belly not me but you don't have a job yeah I know so if
that's all you're doing okay it's not that hard good point hey that is a job
look at how angry look look at his eyes did you see did you see the fucking
change did you see oh my god oh my god you went crazy for a second
Robert De Niro face here that and let me ask you something Steve Steve all
right no no don't fucking leave no I love you dude I love you don't love
eyes all right I love you did you get angry what I just said no I didn't be
honest be honest you hit the truth button I like that yeah I like that
brother I love you so much no see that's not love now it's Renzos to Renzos get in
your cop we got the police officer I don't even know your last name what's
your last name oh Renzos let me get makeup you know what I want to make up
our last name for Renzos because he can't reveal it what he looks like to me
yeah yeah yeah Venezuela oh Renzos Venezuela yeah yeah that's what no
Venezuela that means so much to me Bobby thank you I will accept that yeah he's
gonna accept it what do you think his last name should be um something
Italian Giovanni as a first name well you're gonna change his first I want to
take his first name down his dipoles and the jawline Giovanni no okay so can I
tell me actually Armenian actually are you are you really I know God what are
you mixed with Filipino Italian oh you are I don't know how that worked out it
just did what is your mom Italian or mom Filipino mom's Filipino you're
penetrates the minorities bring up your hundred episodes guys he still refuses
to stop I know I know we I just want to say something to you Ranzo you're one
of the good LAPD cops it's out there all right well you're not allowed to say I
already said I don't care I don't care it doesn't matter anymore you you you your
beliefs are on the same lines as my beliefs and why are we whispering because
I want to be real with you because I like you so much it's a heart-to-heart it
is what it is it's hard and I believe that if you were at the Rodney King
beating if you took a time machine I wasn't there I know but if you were I
believe that you would probably just do one kick and that's it just one yeah
this one like just cuz you want to be a part of it part of the team player right
right just out of peer pressure you would like kick him in the neck and then
walk back it was a different way back then yeah I think it would be like a
knee-jerk reaction like everyone's doing it about oops yeah what's the scariest
thing you've experienced as a cop oh my gosh um it's scariest thing I've had
guns pulled on me oh yeah I mean the rest of the amount of restraint yeah that
he has to practice and order to just the things that go through your head when
you see that this is happening and there's no one else that can deal with a
problem you're now there and facing it and you know that that's very scary
cuz fucking real yeah but you have to lock it down because you know it's your
job what does that mean you just got to control everything and control the
situation yeah and that's why you're a good cop because he's a martial artist
he did Taekwondo champion life so he practices restraint and take on do yes
do you really know yeah actually Gilbert and I we sparred with Taylor
Lautner Twilight really I knew some people back
narcissism narcissism you know Tete I just bumped into them I just bumped into
them yeah yeah excuse me sir yeah yeah so a gun being pulled up what would do
you ever have to do something like get a cat out of a tree yeah is that stuff
real only in cartoons some lady wanted me to like chase or find a ghost that
was living in her house okay I wanted me to change the channel or replace the
batteries of her remote I've been called for all sorts of things the lady at
McDonald's was taking too long with her order so I got called you know this
person in front of me is taken forever right what can you do all right so what
do we pay you for you walk into our house right and then she's like can you
put these batteries in my remote control yeah what do you say I have to say yes
man you don't have to but understand the circumstances she's also like senior
you know right you know can't even get out of the the wheelchair so yeah but it
is kind of ridiculous when you see it on the screen because they tell you a
little blurb you know right someone needs assistance with remote batteries yeah
you know your partner we laugh at it but then when you're there it's kind of you
know it depends when you're there if I was a cop and I showed up and they asked
for bad batteries and remote control Rodney King beating yeah me and a guy
is just pumbling or a fuck with six I don't give a fuck that's a ridiculous
that's what he did to his grandma when they were younger yeah like beat her
with sticks yeah we're Steve he left Steve do you remember when grandma was
paralyzed from the neck down yeah and she had welts all over her body yeah in
Korea yeah and then dad goes how come this world's and we all we don't know and
then one day he walks in the room and me and my brother are hitting with with
sticks yeah for people that's against the law yeah I'm pretty sure it's still
against the law to just beat anyone with kids I suck dick too then you know I
mean you make mistakes we would never be partners Bobby I'm sorry yeah no be
real you but we can be like can you get him but can you take one or ride along
oh I would love to I would love to do a ride a dream and vlog it babe oh what
could we vlog it or not I would actually just like to have you like solve all the
crimes and talk to all the people okay I think I think there's a little hint of
um you're joking there a little bit what I'm saying right now is is that what I
don't like about your tone is is that you don't know my skills and you don't
know my detective skills you don't know my
investigating skill you don't know bitch either then when you're when I'm
playing resident and I have to get in a there's a little puzzle that you have to
solve I do it fairly quick but you know what Bobby you're very tactical I know
the way he played destiny that's some skill that's you play destiny with him
yeah yeah and six is let me say something very tactical that's why I love
this guy because when we were in the Philippines
Kalila got sick right yeah and I relied everything on this guy to walk even I
don't know how to get anywhere because I'll walk you what tell me walk through
remember we were walking far to hotel through a festival parade parade I don't
even know the language we didn't speak the language and people are like it was
chaos it was like but you know what you showed like fucking leadership
did I know maybe you guys would be good partner you fucking you locked it down
for your girl let me say something right now dude if I was gay right now dude I
would suck you off from fucking hundred episode do it right now I'm joking I
would never suck them up I don't want that I don't like cops but yeah but so
yeah you saved my life that down that would that time you know you did it man
it was all you God give Renzo applause he was amazing you're very amazing get up
around also want to maybe have Renzo on and talk more about crazy story crazy
stories like that the ghost and all that stuff next time would you do it next
time next time all right you promise I promise I'd love you had to have you on
we have a caller from Canada oh we have a Canadian caller put it closer to the
mic they're not picking up I'll see guys right now we're calling a fan who
loves picking up we are this phone this phone just
not working out damn it hey hello hey hey buddy hey
should I do a question not yet man in case in case he picks up why did you put
him in the balloon what does it matter
oh my god just let me leave a message long time listen what's his name
Keenan hey Keenan it's Bobby Lee from Tiger Belly listen fuckface if you're
gonna put your number in a lottery to have us call on our hundredth episode
and you don't pick up that's fucked up wrong it's like hey saying to a friend
let's go watch the movie 730 Wonder Woman at the movie theater and then I show
up and you're not there and I'm watching Wonder Woman by myself I already
seen it okay I'm gonna say this right now you're the shittiest Canadian I've
ever been like because generally what Canadians are very nice and punctual
you don't even pick up your phone you fucking cocksucker what's your same
Keenan Keenan Keenan all right I'm sorry I got a little hostile I
apologize thanks for listening all right quick question from Instagram live
when we do last time are we surprised with the growth oh man I mean the honest
truth is no I think I honestly expect more because I know what Joey Diaz is
doing I know what these other places are doing and they're doing way more than
us fighter than the kid and whatnot so I expect more but I'm happy with the
progress I think that we are that we we could reach a lot of people that we
haven't reached yet yeah but I also want to do it organically and I don't want to
do it like you know pay money to do it or promote it I think this is good word
of mouth but it's still great but it doesn't make me feel like that doesn't
make me my mood change I'm still kind of a little hostile and but maybe this is
who I am you know how about you babe I think that we're doing pretty well for
being relatively new that you know I I do believe that obviously like I'm an I
expect more I always want more I never want to be complacent in the idea that
okay we're doing okay we're now making money that's never enough for me I
always want to be the biggest and the baddest but I more importantly I always
want to enjoy doing this so I think that as long as you know this is a room that
we come into and I you know I enjoy being with you guys it'll always be worth
it to me the day it stops being enjoyable is the day that I won't even the
money and everything else won't even matter right hopefully we'll never come
to that day because we have one more guest the the huge guest that we have
so over the course of a hundred episodes we have non-stop talked about George and
for Jessica and I think in because we've after a hundred episodes I think
it's time we tie some loose ends and we have some closure regarding George and
Jessica so if we can please if we can please welcome my best friend Jessica
yeah rock set but it's over now turn it off oh my god I love that song so much
it's not a good start for you my friend what I want to say to you is first of
all you're the most Korean person I've ever met in my life I don't think so no
it just in terms of how I feel because sometimes I want a headbutt on the face
but that's just the Korean hello right there's a there is a physical like I
want to hurt each other yeah when we see you're also the most Korean person I
know why because I want a head budget yeah so that's that we got that
established and number two and you you you rejected you rejected pink dick you
know start from the very beginning let's talk about how this this whole
started I love how uncomfortable is this for me to talk now or is this when
did you first start it started when did you start to like Jessica when did you
meet her just wait what a matter with I'm feeling like warm in my chest you're
fine was that a one of the fight one of the fight nights here look at me don't
look at her your memory you're burning a fucking hole in her heart I don't remember
the first time meeting her I remember yeah I think she helped me do my hair
one night okay podcast and I think that you actually were very like uninterested
at that time okay probably yeah I feel so bad for you right now
oh yeah Gilbert first Gilbert first you want to eat her ass or something yeah I
guess yeah I had heard about her beforehand from all the Gilbert podcast
yeah like I wanted to eat her butt yeah why when I look at her I want to head
better on the face I don't want to eat her but the story oh for the story yeah
journalistic yeah so George when did you start feeling feelings no we were
hanging out like we were hanging out his friends like for a while like through the
podcast I didn't know I was like the thing is I thought I was catching a
vibe early on but I wasn't sure I was really so I didn't know so like cuz
like I was helping her out with like a few like work things and stuff like being
nice and I was like and you are very helpful and I was like yeah so she
invited me out to dinner and I was like is this yeah yeah yeah I that's what I
but I was still like what does this mean it's probably just dinner as friends but
it got the like idea in my head I was like and then we did dinner I was like
yeah this was his friends yeah um but yeah we still kept on hanging out a
little bit and then when I don't like I kept going on hikes and stuff oh I
enjoy hikes don't there's not a fight you went hiking you went hiking we did we
did yeah what are you denying what are you what is your face saying right now
no I want you to finish your story and then yeah yeah well I've seemed like it
seems like everything I'm saying is wrong according to your face look at me
don't look at her look at me my friend yeah all right okay I want him to say
it to me no no Jessica don't run the fucking gambit right I got it look at
me right now so how are you feeling now so you're going on hikes with her yeah
you the dinner kind of made you go oh maybe I think we went on one hike okay
the one was with Gobi oh yeah that's right because I needed like another
person yeah yeah right so then when you went on that one hike like more times
than just that but yeah oh yeah you guys also went to San Diego together yes
whoa which you were supposed to go to oh that's right I know that's the final
that's I feel so anyway guys come on supposed to be a vacation let me play
rock set no no no no okay let's skip ahead let's skip ahead right we're
hanging out as group like a group setting in a group setting yeah then the weekend
before San Diego me a Kalyla and Gilbert were in here and Kalyla asked this
question like hey uh throw me in there yeah hey what go ahead hey who uh if some
below some girl just like texted you out of the blue like hey you want to hook
up just to check out check things out would you say yes and like the the
person in my head like when I like when you said this I was like the person who
would do that probably not somebody I would want to hook up with I didn't have
a face yeah so I was like you know innocent me and not thinking like yeah
Kalyla has no no other reason to say this than just uh because she's curious
about texting somebody at random yeah I was so I was like gave an honest answer
like no no way that's weird and then I stepped out of the house I was like one
step out of the house I was like wait a second if that was Jessica I would
probably have said yes and then I was like was it Jessica do you think that I
was asking on behalf of her baby baby you fucked up as soon as I stepped out of
the house I did yo you did that I planted the seed yeah as soon as you did
that yo but Kalyla I did it out of like but I asked them 10,000 questions a day
Joker what kind of medieval fucking diabolical bullshit but my response here
here's that here's what I think okay in the very beginning I met George I really
do respect him so much and of course if I yeah and I wanted if if I had ever
why are you laughing I I'll be honest I did sort of entertain the idea of the
both of them possibly hooking up because they're both people that I really
like and I wouldn't just throw her to somebody that I didn't like like I knew
that George was like decent and he was kind and he you know had you know all
of these things so yeah maybe sometimes I threw George a bone you know so so I
was like but I was like I never caught like I was like never got a sense from
her like that there was any possibility of anything so then the next weekend you
ditched out on San Diego going to see sharks yeah I went but I was like was
that question was that hypothetical for me I was like I have to man up and just
figure out now so then because because she asked that question mm-hmm and it
planted the seed yes it started growing inside your soul yes and then you began
to have feelings based on this kind of little fantasy of maybe I think yeah so
Kalyla did that so a week of the plant growing within your soul then you go to
San Diego which was the cement the foundation I think that built the house
but you know what the house was built on sand quick sand hey thank you thank you
thank you Jenna quick said the quick said as I would soon find out what you go
to San Diego with her yeah and then what did you guys do we went we went and
swam with sharks and but a bonding experience yeah just you and Jessica
yeah well what are you going to San Diego with a guy for that you're not
you're not feeling you have any feelings for listen I have a very deep love for
sharks one yeah to Kalyla was supposed to come I bailed that morning I know it
was left to Georgia be like I'm sick and I was going to go by myself but he's
like oh what's this about you know this shark thing yeah I was like well I'm
going anyway you can come if you want that's how you said it I you can look
at the text oh wow you saved it you can look at the time Kim Kardashian over
here came a right so then you so but but by her letting you go to San Diego you
you kind of in your head I'm saying this like I because I feel like I'm kind of
being attacked here but is it an attack to like a claim that somebody likes me is
that an insult no no no you might have like me oh don't attack me with those
words don't insult me by saying it's really calm down from a woman's
perspective here's I'll tell you how it is yeah when when we have to deny some
but not deny or like reject somebody and it's especially if it's someone that we
actually like who's in our friend circle it becomes very tricky because no
matter what we're the bitch we're the enemy and we're the ones who hurt you
so for for that whole feeling of feeling attacked is is something I'm very very
familiar with so because everybody even though we make fun of you George we we
do like all poor George poor George poor George when it's really like she's
more like why poor George I I didn't do anything we never had sex we never made
out we never did anything I don't she doesn't feel I don't I don't cast any
blame yeah but here's where she went wrong though you don't invite a guy a
little guy to San Diego why not because of the fact that he might it wasn't it
wasn't every guy no every guy with a woman right wants to fuck the woman all
right see this all right I'll go meet I'll go meet a girl friend friend at a
coffee shop cuz they're going through something whatever I'll do that if I was
single but if I'm gonna go on the road like not do stand up but if a girl went
I'm going to El Paso just for the weekend you want to go I already assume
that there's sexuality going on I don't think George saw every guy feels that
way so you know this no he didn't feel that way ask him now he didn't feel that
way well really so when you you're saying because you planted the seed right
a week before only because of the seed right so the seed is there so you see
not you're blaming Kalyla for asking you a question that probably might have not
even related the seed has to land on fertile soil for it to grow so don't so
you are so you are so you went really as like oh I'm gonna enjoy this time with
a girl who's friendly you didn't think like oh sex and like no but I like her
he liked her yeah okay no in he liked her he had feelings I don't think at
that point yes he did right you're not listening baby
at this point I was like I have to see if they're the if I have feelings or not
I have to see if something's there yeah but when you're going to San Diego
whether you got excited not because you're a shark hunting or whatever you
guys are doing right whatever you do with the sharks right swimming with
sharks but you're excited because you're going to San Diego with a grill that you
might like look at me right now yeah there you go thank you what the fuck
are you having a guy going to San Diego with you I'm going with or without him
I know but that's what you should have said Korean you should have said no I'm
going on my own Kalyla's not going I'm not gonna go down San Diego with you I
don't know you why because I don't for me if I'm single and there was a girl
that I'm not attracted to who was just a friend of mine it was like I want to go
with you I would just be like okay why is it always like why can't we is it's
always on us when we accept some type of invitation my responsibility if I'm
just like yeah you know what I want to go with this dude I don't know if I'm
interested or not but what's the what's the hurt in that I love how all the guys
in this room right now all the men in this room if I was in the movie 300 no
one would show up can I also ask you a question yeah let's suppose even at that
point in time even if she had 2% of interest in George and she wanted to
explore it and maybe after San Diego or maybe a week after that she's like you
know what I thought I did but I didn't want to that's also okay so even at that
moment I think that there was a little bit of interest there initially yeah
because I do honestly I do have like a tremendous amount of respect for you and
I felt like no it's true I was in a very kind of maybe like a challenging
situation at that time and I felt like you really really you came through for
her you did and I was like whoa and it did make me consider like he would be a
clutch-ass partner like in life because he was just and you would be I said he
was giving was really it's really rare to find someone that can give advice
outside of themselves like only people can only think like in their own
perspective and he I think has this unique kind of ability to really so now
you're anyways but I I still think he's great and he's okay whatever and not to
say that like and he's easy to be around it's not like oh let me take him to
San Diego and relax tea is master no in her defense I had tried I had invited
her to other things like other social events like and like she'd always said
no so this was okay I'm gonna just say this right now and so that you fucking
you fucking weasel you fucking worm all right you go down to San Diego with
this one all right you now you're sending your feelings right a little bit
that's when you throw a move oh that's true we gotta get right that's when you
throw a fucking move listen to me right right and if she goes no you never talk
to her again no you say hi at events and you go you know you can go oh hey you
know me but in terms of you know you distance yeah but that's not what you
did huh oh no I did the worst but well if I had done the move down there then
that's an awkward car ride back that's true that's the price we pay it for
taking risks okay so how did it go down how did it get awkward at the end
though didn't it it did get very well no no what happened was you came on the
podcast he comes on the podcast he talks about after San Diego I'm like I with a
whole drive back I'd like it's like I'm in high school again I'm like come on
George man up just say something and see if there's anything there and there's
a whole time yeah and then finally like she drops me like parks in front of my
house so you think there's anything here when you said it started I was like
downtown LA okay ten minutes to my house let's start the conversation and then
it just wheel open it out and I know I hate myself so she go you said
something what you say what did you say yeah oh geez what did you say George no
this is okay this is another issue look at me what the fuck did I say okay no
there was another girl who would like the night before so I was like let's let's be
manly and let her know that I have other options but when you like yet but what
came out of my mouth so weak I was like you idiot I was like yeah so this last
night this other girl like she a she said she wanted to date me but I might
have feelings for you so like it was so high so you basically told her there's
this other girl that's waiting so if you don't give it to me I'm gonna go with
the other girl yeah Jesus wow one point to Jessica that's when it hurt cuz she
knew no the next week the next week like that had like she's like Jessica like
that's after said he was like let me think about it like cuz think she
doesn't want to like hurt take me down so hard right then it was like yeah I
should have taken them down right then and then so so I'm like okay this is
inevitable this is gonna happen and I'm just like cruising through that week then
the next week like okay she rejected me on the like the week after okay right
before the podcast then the podcast comes and Bobby's like so you told her
about another girl huh and I was like wait a second Jessica talks to Calila
Calila talks to Bobby best friend I can have no think of that I don't tell my
friends anything what yeah they're white they're why George's analogy for me in
the car when he I was driving him back home he was like I was how things with
Jessica well if you think of it like a stove I was like and I smile a little
but it's only about this I put her on the burner I'm pretty high oh I lowered
it and you're like it's a medium and then I think she might have lowered the
burner a little lower that was the day after you okay I was gonna call you out
for like making that up from Prairie Home Companion but no I guess that's god
damn it so then so that was probably my lowest point on Tiger Belly is like to
realize like the grapevine because I'm like if I say anything to Jessica it
can get to Bobby and hurt me like if I can say anything to anybody it'll get
to bike because I'll admit a lot more things to a lot more people than to you
Bobby I'm not gonna like give you any ammunition you don't need me but I want
to let's so at this point Bobby on the podcast you said George you need to man
up and make a move right told you he gave you also the very wrong advice which
is what what advice also did you give him Kalyla I don't remember oh I think I
might have I might have told him to be more assertive no you didn't what did I
did you said you said like come like oh yeah pump the brakes a little bit he
said to be assertive and just go for it I said pump the brakes hmm and you
listen to Bobby guys listen to me right now and do you pump do you pump the
brakes or do you go for it he went for it let me ask you something guys in the
room remember it completely huh go for it exactly but she's my best friend I
know her back I know go for it even if her best friend is like the pump the
brakes guys you should have listened to the best friend yes but I knew it goes
by he doesn't know no no I had to go with my psychology because at this point
we talked about it at this point like if I hadn't made a move I was like would
have been waiting on her I couldn't like date any like go try to date any other
girls cuz I would like in the back of my mind I was like if Jessica even says
like gives me a hint of anything I'll go with her I can't like promise like
anything to any other women at that moment so I was like okay I don't think
Bobby's right here but but I'm gonna listen to that advice cuz I have to
know for sure yeah but we talked about it yeah well but that would didn't change
my psychology how did you how did you do it how did you do it George how'd you go
with the disaster here so you're at a stove right yeah you're at the stove you
have the pan out you put the grease in the pan I relived every other moment and
this one was still blocked from my memory alright so tell me what happened you
got a little drunk well that wasn't on purpose okay so you're a little drunk
that was actually inadvertent I was hanging out with Bryce Bryce we were
yeah we probably had these words are ringing in your head go for it dude go
I love it I think you made fun of him like a lot yeah and I still do and I'll
never stop no no the drink it like the drinking was a completely inadvertent
cuz I was like I texted you earlier about like hey could I drop off some
bags which I don't receive anymore yeah yeah you don't fucking deserve you're
right you're right you suck as dick you get eggs egg for egg I get it I get it
so I didn't inadvertently like I was like wait until she was home but like ten
or something so like Bryce and I like we were out drinking at shortstop and then
I drive over and hipster bar I love it like yeah I'm like driving there and I'm
like I am a little drunk this is gonna look well bad but I was like nah I can
pretend to not be drunk I can do that so yeah again I made a we chatted for a
little bit and you're at the house you're at the house you just text he's like
you home yeah and he didn't even tell me he was coming then he just shows up at
the door did you have eggs on them I don't think so no did you have eggs oh I
would I'd beg to differ with the textual exchange on this one you had eggs in hand
or not it matters it matters a guy walking into a house with a fucking no
he just came like to the door with eggs or not let's just let's just go with
eggs that's sad you didn't have eggs when you're drunk at 10 p.m. or whatever time
it was he always shows up with eggs yeah anyway so you're at the house right
you're drunk and then tell me walk me through what happens oh we're chatting
she goes outside we walk to like her car she'd like get something for her car
or something and I'm like annoyingly close and then like guys we sit down on
a curb or something and she's just like giving me nothing absolutely nothing
and I'm like well you know what if I tried to kiss her right now she would
like really like that I'm sure that's what I was missing out on like you know like
really like voice in your head I was like yeah she what happened is she didn't
get to kiss me so that's why she rejected me earlier if she had that
opportunity things would be so different and then I leaned in like my
breathtaking of beer and just got soundly rejected with like a why are you
doing that you said what what are you doing you said that just talk into the
mic just I wouldn't be surprised if that's what I said because as he said I
was giving him nothing and I didn't know that this was going through your head
but he was sitting there he was a little close and I'm like maybe he's he's
trying and I don't know but we were just sitting like next to each other side by
side yeah and all of a sudden I think I see his arm come around like like this
and and he kind of like he rushed me a little bit and I was like she did one of
them miss me oh you didn't miss move yeah and then you said what are you doing
and then what do you say yeah that's probably what I said I don't remember I
blocked the rest of this from my memory I just I can't believe you didn't kill
yourself oh my god that I wouldn't be able to live through that but he did
that's what makes you a man a man like very it's very interesting I'd like to
wrap this up with a few hard-hitting questions here yeah Jessica from the
bottom of your heart the most your and most honest I considered it yeah did you
consider having sex with him oh okay the scale of one to ten ten being the
most consideration and zero being no consideration consideration is just
yes or no George Kimmel for your consideration not even on the nominees
did you wonder about his dick size yeah but I'm curious about everybody that's
true yeah fair yeah and so after the rejection you went home woke up the
next day and you knew it was done and then I watched Breaking Bad for a week
straight and I finally caught up on Breaking Bad how depressed were you for a
week pretty damn depressed okay one final question before we wrap this up guys
sorry it's not your fault it's no one's fault it's one final question George do
you yeah I got to breaking bad you know I hadn't finished it before I needed to
be depressed final question when you see her around now do you still have
lingering feelings it's as simple as yes or no George oh my god questions you
ever consider me a little bit Jessica look at me for real though Gilbert I love
you I love you all right thank you Jessica that was amazingly uncomfortable I
love George that was amazing oh we have one caller who's actually on standby
why oh the queue was it as we have a guy from Australia a different guy who
just messes me on Twitter I'll never mind these are working none of these are
fucking working these collars these colors are you call him yeah I did it's
just no speaking I think it's international they're all international
I know but call him again wait what about the people on the list I called those
two no one's are responding all right now what else do we have anyone else is
Jenna here do you have an interview or no no we're gonna have her for a different
episode Dorothy would you like to take a seat yeah let's bring Dorothy up you got
to do it you got to do it she's a tiger belly fan she won the lottery of coming
here we've added her right we've added her we've seen her at the lives and she
brought cupcakes and food she's amazing yes Dorothy please sit down put the
thing on okay all right I mean Dorothy what kind of Asian are you I'm a
Filipino Asian so how long you've been listening to Tiger Belly probably since
like episode three and then of course I listened to one and two yeah but what
brought you on to like what how did you discover it well I was listening to a
little Esther oh yeah actually found her because I was looking for faheem stuff
faheem and war yes yes then I found Esther yeah and then I heard you on
Esther's and then I did a search for you and then Tiger Belly came up here what
other podcasts do you listen to you made it weird the Nerdist great debates
Nick America Nick you Nick you it's up yeah yeah let me ask you this why podcast
why do you like them I drive a shit ton that's what it is a lot of things in
the car yeah yeah and see I don't want to rank us amongst the ones I don't want
to get rejected like George because I don't really hurt me I don't like it
but you would you like you like it yes I like am I being too needy yeah yeah you
know I don't give a fuck if you like it use the stove and he's here yeah no
thank you for being here what episodes do you that stand out to you any time
Steve is on you know you left you left yeah yeah do you like guests or not
guests I like guests yeah but you like I don't need guests I don't need I don't
need guests my sister doesn't like guests at all you don't like guests at all you
like us when it's just us I thought this podcast was fun because it was us you
know that's great and you what your favorite song is what that I'm
improvised oh yeah hey everybody everybody
hey everybody everybody thank you so what do you do for living I work in
education special education people there special need you cringe when Bobby
says well when we all say like the R word or no I don't did you hear about a
story about getting with those women who were I think in Orange County when you
have like the down syndrome joke and stuff how they all like stood up and
left and they left them like a really like skating review when you hear
things like that you are you like mmm I kind of see where they're coming from or
I kind of are you like no where do you stand on that when it comes to comedy I
think when it comes to comedy anything goes you know it doesn't bother me you
just made me I just you're my favorite listen when you just said that it's the
way you said eloquent precise yeah like the precision behind it I mean it thank
you so much because you know why Dorothy why we live in the great US of a
that's right where we're the land of free thinking mm-hmm right the free
thinking mm-hmm and you and I don't necessarily live in a Trump America we
live in America correct true and here's another thing that you that you
witness and I don't think you can you've thought about it but you you felt it
is that you know that my intentions are from a good place I'm not really
hateful right right right with some of these fucking nut jobs think that I'm
being real but yeah because you guys don't say that take that out people know
okay when I go to urban nights shut the fuck up and I walk up to Chris Tucker
whoever it might be Chris or whatever what's that yeah you're eating all day
every day dog you know get jiggy with it brah they get it they get it right
Dorothy right it's totally fine you know that I'm just doing a character
right just having fun with that this is not a literal podcast this is just me
having fun with my family and my friends right and you can turn it off if you want
to but I will not let the man chain me oh never right Renzo that's right who's
the man though you okay I will not let you chain me bitch okay lady I mean
what's it what are you doing I was just checking for no one's picking up no one's
picking up fuck the phone thing okay from now on George when we do the phone
thing right what I just say yeah and is there in another way that a mechanism we
can get where we don't even have to do that that it just comes to the oh my god
I'm sorry Roxette came back on we should have remind George again
rubbing it in his face again why would you do that why would you do that what do
one more local number tried all of them but I mean who are these people what if
this is a prank on us can you believe it we sent out the email say hey submit your
number and we got over 500 numbers and nobody is picking up I think now that's
great but Dorothy you've showed up to our lives and stuff like that right I
showed up to the first the first live the first live which was amazing yeah in
that little room remember that little room oh yeah I remember do you know come
the second one I didn't you would have loved it I bet I would and I knew a lot
of the answers for the trivia oh you did I did you saw it yeah yeah you watch
all of them yes I watch all of them I listen to them first and then I watch
them and then sometimes like when I'm like just you know passively in my house
I'll just put on a random you guys are always on in my house yeah you know what
you seem Korean to me right attitude a good Korean Filipino attitude what's
Filipino attitude just resistant resistant and they try to edit you and
they're also the man they're the man the man in the house and thank you Dorothy
so much and I value I value you thank you let me give my compliment okay okay
listen Dorothy I value you thank you so much okay I'm gonna start again listen
Dorothy I value you and I appreciate your support and your bill Golderman your
enthusiasm your canted perceptions and I enjoy your vibe in general so thank you
thank you thanks for having me so where we at time wise this is a lot over 90
minutes so over 90 I think that we should decide on the official name for our
listener so we have a couple options and I think we're gonna do a vote in this
room mm-hmm so people submitted to what they want to be okay so he these are the
options for our fan names number one toky dum-dums that's my dick I don't know
it's also derogatory like I don't want to call our fans a toky dum-dums Bobby dick
yeah I like it they want to call themselves that I yeah but who are who's
voting for this okay what's the other option that was left kingdom which is my
favorite the slept kingdom yeah the third one is the belly brigade I like belly
brigade no I like slept kingdom okay well what other ones George well I will
say that Facebook from chose toky dum-dums as was their top vote 46 votes you
know I change my mind yeah I think toky dum-dums are good because I could see it
on a t-shirt yeah hold on one second oh we got somebody who answered okay this
girl his name is clear I'm gonna hand the phone to just a random person hold on
one second is this a local number I don't know just hello hi I'm gonna pass you
to Bobby okay what's our what's there cuz do you have do you have an iPhone by
chance okay can we FaceTime you instead let's just let's leave it as this we've
got somebody got a satellite hang on one second hang on here's here's the
slept king one second I'm weird on the phone what is your name
Christa Christa well where are you calling from we called her I mean why
do we call no we're we calling morning so it's probably two three in the
morning there huh I'm sorry woke you tell her what happened with all the other
callers can I just say this we've called probably 20 numbers and you're the
only one that's picked up yeah this is our hundredth episode this has been a
rule of frustrating night I've left so many bad messages on people's machines
I don't know if I'm going to be like a good subject online but no you're the
best you picked up it's God's will you never heard we appreciate you and your
value you we value you as a listener and we think that you're a kindred
spirit and may all your wishes and dreams come true you're welcome what do
you do for a living Cristalina you're a what at night a designer you design
a U.S. designer yeah and have you ever been to any of my live shows in D.C.
area oh thank you and what what do you have a favorite guest no I'm just so
excited that we have somebody one person yeah I'm like nervous like I don't
want her to leave what's your favorite I'm guest that we've had on the on tiger
whoa whoa I'll throw out some guests and then you tell me which one you
prefer feel Vaughn or estra coup yeah so if you're Vaughn how about this Jordan
Peele or estra coup Jordan Peele right yeah yeah she said yeah well let me say
something because I am Cristobal Cristobal's I I love you and I know that
you have your job in the morning as a legal analyst and that you have to get
to work but I just want to say that you're the only color that picked up and
I hope hopefully that our paths in life will meet and we will send you stickers
and other goodies tell our email right now we're gonna email you we're gonna
send you some goodies and you're gonna be on the podcast and yeah do you have
an Instagram or Twitter that you want to promote or no are you that type of
person you're one of those you're one of those you're one of those so anyway
thank you so much for picking up and I love you okay
she said I love you all racist I love you all I love you all she said I can't
believe we just had one it's fine I feel like I just want to call people and be
like fuck you you know yeah should we call any of our previous guests maybe I
can I have some I have 11% that was a good one but I wanted an abroad one how
can we can't call a brother I want an Australian a lot of the broads are not
working I have the Australians too I'm sure cuz I can't do it on Google are
you doing this just want to do some quick shout outs everybody who's helped
us out breaking my heart
hi five right there first intern Kenneth Johnny and stave official
blue mechanic John's fucking Russell for Jason Omar Arthur Bryce Annabelle and
Eric Fiat Bo may I just say something yeah for being at hundredth episode this
was by far the worst episode we have ever done I don't think so I think it was
really I love this episode you know how I know you know how I know I loved it
it's because in every episode I'm like but to me when I go what time you said
an hour and a half I thought it was only 20 minutes yeah that's how much I'm
having fun this is the best episode I've ever done it's fun there's all kinds of
energy things going on we went through a lot of sadness a lot of sadness for
everyone that I love in the world is in the room I thought it was a great I
loved people not picking up I loved everything about it yeah so I don't
know what your negativity you're doing that shit again that Filipino shit
resistance resisting I seriously made a list of all the people that we were
gonna call is there is our shit just not working or what it's calling they're
just not picking up all right so that's my heart all right that's because it
doesn't go by your plan but sometimes it's when it's not going well is good
and you get a crystal bell though yeah yeah so um do we have any yeah we don't
have unhelpful questions but really any closing words from you guys to all the
audience for a hundredth episode yeah go ahead babe no you guys start I just
want to say that this podcast has um I really do believe it's changed my career
okay I'm saying my thing and now you're being rude and I don't now want to do
the closing sorry Bobby because I was being real okay go start over babe
anyway I believe that this podcast has changed my career in the in in a good
way it's gotten me I think it's gotten me more numbers on the road it just
everything about it it makes me more street relative and you because now
like we're doing street cred credible relevant that's what I just said
street relevance relative street relevance we know what you meant is the
street relevance not a thing you said relative yeah I'm relative I'm street
relative when people say that my career is not I'm not relevant irrelevant yeah
is it different irrelevant and relative are very different oh okay well now now
I don't now I don't want to do the speech yeah a speech babe come on come on
it's our hundredth episode we got to end on a good note no one wanted to pick up
her phone calls I didn't Jenna laugh and I just left with her she started the
cascade of laughter anyway it's been cool and I loved it you're doing this
thing again you do it no you do you do it Bobby every every Monday is like when
I come in like around seven o'clock hits and I just like get a smile on my face
and I start getting everything ready no I went for it and it was the wrong move
I lose the eggs lose the egg lose the stove analogy you fucker how did you
remember that god damn it's ridiculous so dumb anyway I like it and it's great
go ahead close I feel like you have any closing words I just want to thank
everyone for listening I want to thank Bobby thank you for putting me through
the ringer what yeah you had to vet me yeah so I like that thank you for
teaching me all your wisdom button career life Kalilah thank you for being
such a kind big sister to me if you would have just gone through your mad TV
audition with me beat by beat you would have got the show doesn't matter it's a
dead show doesn't matter I'm well they're selling it to Netflix but
happy birthday it's not no one's birthday happy hundred happy hundred to
you and everyone everybody everybody have a good time hello all right who
blows it we all guys hundred episodes your closing words I I really love you
guys George I know I give you a lot of shit and I'm very contradictory and I
attack you a lot but I also want to let you know that this ship would not sail
without you true true Gilbert you're forever my little brother and sweetie no
matter where we are in life whether we stay together you're not leaving oh I'm
not leaving you know this is the you're fucked this is a lifelong fuck blood
bond it's a commitment you are absolutely you shouldn't have swiped
right that's the last that this is bad it's bad for you I will never regret
swiping right yeah and we are going to be best friends forever no you're not
leaving the situation I'm not leaving you said it was a fuck blood and Gilbert
you have a lot to edit in this or no no anyway thanks for listening everybody
goodnight make sure you follow us on tiger belly at tiger belly on Twitter at
gmail.com you guys next time we ask you to fucking give us your numbers fucking
pick up the phone Jesus
hey prime members you can listen to tiger belly ad-free on Amazon music
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