TigerBelly - Episode 109: James Van Der Beek is Our GW

Episode Date: September 20, 2017

James stops by to talk Diplo, poolhouses, wolverine claws, founding fathers, pussy frenzies, the rom com life, and the assassination of the ego.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening ad-free on Wondery Plus. Welcome to Tiger Belly. We have a new baby right here. We have the baby from erasure head that mom Kalyla gave me as a gift. She had some artists. Who's the artist? Jeremy. I think his last name is Rimmel or Rymel. Rimmel or Rommel. But his Instagram handle is Miss Creation Toys. Miss Creation Toys. Show him baby Panopo. Right here baby Panopo from the movie Erasure Head and it's mine. And it's his favorite David Lynch movie. It's one of my favorite David Lynch movies and I'm gonna, his little tongue sticking out so I'm gonna do a little bit of like incest. So I'm telling you what we're doing right. I'm okay. So we have a guest today. It's

James Vanderbink but I'm a little nervous so I wanted to start up before even got here because I'm a little nervous. He's a legitimate, I feel like, I've never saw Dawson's Creek but I feel like he's a legitimate television star and he's handsome and he's super nice but I wanted to start, I wanted to talk about gross things before he shows up because I don't want to taint his heart with our destructive minds. Now we saw a movie last night for my birthday. It's called Mother and it's basically like a fever dream. Nightmare? It's kind of porn-ish, nightmare. There's nothing porn-ish about it. To me it was. It was kind of a nightmare and I don't really know what it's about. I know that it has to do with God and the environment,

Adam and Eve, about narcissism, how women, they don't have a voice, you know. Were the unheard. Yeah, my brother was sitting next to me. Were the abused and unheard. My brother was sitting next to me and my brother was like, what the fuck is it? Every five minutes. What the fuck is this? You like this? Are you having fun? He goes, oh my god, I can't fucking believe this. How much is he talking to theater? In the meantime, Ilani and I are like crying because we get it. There's something, I mean you can pull your own, you know, parallels from it. It's what resonates with you, right? So it's basically open to many types of interpretations but I don't know. I felt very, I loved it so much and I honestly didn't, I didn't want to be touched by Bobby afterwards because I felt like he was

the guy in the movie. I was the Harrier Bardem in the movie. But in many ways, he plays a poet and he's famous, I guess, people know him and she thought that I was that character, really. It's like he doesn't really love her, he just loves to be loved. Right. But that's the most, don't ruin it for people. Well, it's one of those movies you can only watch once. Yeah, you can never watch it again. You can't watch it again. It's too, it's way too much but I would give it a minus. Yeah, it's pretty good. You say Oscar winner probably? No, people hate it. I think that people will either completely get it or completely hate it. There's no middle ground. There's no middle ground. I mean there are reviews like this is the worst movie I've ever made. I

don't think anyone walks out of there saying, it was okay. I don't think there's, there'll be any of that. It's either you completely, it completely resonates or it does not at all. Or you just walk out. Yeah. Damn. Yeah, it's that powerful. Right. It's a powerful, I don't know. But there's a point in the movie where it's either you get it or you don't. When the beginning you're like, oh, because you don't even know their names, the character's names. The credits go down and just as Jennifer Lawrence's mother. Oh, right. Javier Bardem guy. I like movies like that. You take what you take from it. Yeah. Michelle Pfeiffer. Ed Harris is good in it. He is really weird in it. He's good in everything. Yeah. He's a fucking great show. You guys should definitely go watch it. I think

if you're dark and demented like the both of us, you'll definitely like this. Yeah. And then also I don't like talking about showbiz no more on the, on the podcast, but Friday night for the first time. Well, you laugh at nothing. Friday night for the first time. All right. So I'm a part of an eight. I have agents. You guys know that, right? Yeah. Yeah. And they invited me to this Emmy party. Okay. Fancy. I've never been invited to it. The first thing I do is when we show up, I see Elijah Schlesinger. I see Matt Bronger. I see all these comics. They go, we come every year. And I've never been invited, which destroyed me kind of Brett Moran. This is how I make my deals at this party. But then we had a good time. It was, it was fun. You guys before not only was it

star-studded, I get it now. That's the club. Oh, the club you're talking about. That's the club. The key. I mean, like, I knew it was the club because I ran into my one and only hall pass. Whoa. Damn. I mean, who? Brent Moran. You were like fucking putting a fucking hole in the back of my head. You can suck his dick. I don't give a fuck. But we were shoulder to shoulder. And he looked at me once and then Bobby is like, he's not, he didn't give me permission. Initially, he did. He was like, well, he's not, he wasn't on the list. He is on the list. No, but I never heard his name before. So it's like, oh, you can put him on the list, but tell me now I have an actual list at the right of down his name. So you have Tom Hardy on there. You got fucking. Who

else is on there? Kit Harrington. Kit Harrington. Yeah. John Snow's on there. Edgar Ramirez. Okay. Now I'm going to put Edgar Ramirez on it. Matthias Schoenart. Okay. How many? Hey, bitch, how many guys are on this list? I know. Seriously. Okay. Look, the likelihood of me actually running into these people are slim to none, right? So that's why I knew this was the club, because I was like, oh my God, Edgar Ramirez is right next to me. Yeah, I can smell him. My hall passes right here. I could make a deal if I want, obviously, like he's way too hot. He would never even, but I'm just saying in my brain. Oh, I would, you know what I would love? You try to hit on him. I would never hit him. Listen, and him reject you. I would have went on the ground

and started convulgated. I like laughing like I would, I would have laughed right in your fucking face. Man, I would never, never. And then if he goes, yeah, but let's go do it. I'll be like, hey, just as long as I can tape. Oh, speaking of taping. Wait, what? I had a really bad dream, you guys. Oh, dreams suck. Is it bad? It's a poetry. I hate it. No, explain. Okay, so I, I dreamt that I got scapulamine, the Borodanga, like you did in Columbia. And I dreamt that some people coerced me to make a sex tape, you know, without me knowing. Basically, I was like a zombie. Yeah. And then they released it on the interwebs. And then they basically, I told Bobby, and then he didn't believe me that I was raped. And he was like, no, you cheated on me. I can

see you were enjoying it on camera. And I was like, no, I was Borodanga. And then he was like, no, no, no. Well, I'm going to say something. That's bullshit. And he broke up. Because how there's no way to prove if you were Borodanga or not. Borodanga. So if I'm, I'm marching a tape. Yeah. And you're like, going, yes, I'm going to swallow it or what you say. Do it in my eyes. You know, I'm going to be like, yeah, she's into it. Yeah. If you're tied up and you're passed out. Then. But that's the thing about Borodanga. Look at George. You know, fuck you, George, for introducing Borodanga to our lives. Add another element to this. Yeah. I didn't want to. Yeah. So even if you're raped in your Borodanga, just don't put

yourself in that situation. Yeah. Well, first of all, someone could just go up and go like that. Well, don't let that happen. Wear a mask. Like, okay, someone's like, hey, sir, can you show me on this map? Like, the iron sheet did that to Hulk Hogan. He backed up and he didn't get sprayed. Hmm. That's great. Yeah. Like, what did that dust that they do? It's like inhalation anthrax. Come on, Bobby. No, fuck you. All right. Edgar Ramirez. He's on the list. You want to get three and that's it. Who's on your list? I have nobody because I love you. You're the only one in my life. Oh, shut the fuck up. Oh, another, another thing happened at the party. Do you guys remember how we were talking about when,

you know, first year of our relationship, Bobby would do fucked up things to me like he would text other women like, Hey, I'd fuck you without a condom. I'd raw dog you or whatever. You guys first started dating. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe a year into it. And then we ended. Yeah. We would fight about it. Don't say the name. I wouldn't. I'm not going to say the name. Jessica Chastain. No, but she was there at the CAA party. She was there? Damn. That's just because she has Chastain, but the girl that. Oh, the girl. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, she was there. She can make me a big hug. And she was like, but this is how fake women are. She knew that we were in a relationship when she was writing and flirting with Bobby in that way. But when she saw me, she was like, Oh,

my God, Bobby, she's way too hot for you. Hi, how are you and trying to be really sweet with me? Yeah. And in my mind, I'm like, you Hollywood ass political bitch. I know what the fuck you've been texting him, you know? But what did I do? I said, you guys catch up, I'll go grab a drink. And I like just exited. I didn't try to make my. Hey, she's not on my list. Don't know why she was ever, but. Oh, I know. Do the girl know that you knew? No. That's the that's why it's in the past. What are we even talking about right here? But there's this, there's a feeling of power when I know something she doesn't. I'm so nervous. What are you going to ask him? I don't even know. Am I going to go? Because I want to go. You know what I want to say

is just show me your dick now. No, you can't. He's a family. I know. But like, I assume that once I know him, but what if he just wants to open up on the podcast? I don't know. But if he's not gonna, he might, he might, he might shock us. He might shock us. I need to have him on because I like him. He wants to be on the podcast and I want to test my interview story. Oh, this is a test for you because I mean, if we get like someone like Jim Norton, we know it's gonna, it's gonna go crazy. Right. But it's like, we had your friend on. What's her name? Which one? Christine. The Samoan. Christine. Yeah. That was a challenge. We had your Jessica's cousin. Oh, my God. What was never released. Yeah, that was a nightmare.

Surprise. Only paid guests. We paid her. So did I pay her? Oh, my God. What a ripoff. Hey, what a ripoff. So, um, yeah, I'm a little nervous, but he's going to be here any second. So why don't we stush, shut it down now or? Yeah, when he goes until he gets here. Yeah. But we're free. What if he cuts here and then I have to just get up and leave? Oh, you're the one who has to greet him at the door. I have to go get him. Okay. I have to explain to him. I gotta go. This is just an apartment. I'm going to get a house one day. Can we do the whole story? Because I had to do that with, you know, Eric Stone Street and Jordan. Like, you know, did they care? No.

Go give us your spiel. What's your spiel? Yeah. What do you say when you pick them up? I go, um, you know, I haven't been doing as good as you guys. You know, I mean, I bought it a long time ago. I was single. This was fine for me. Right. And they go, yeah, okay. And then they don't say anything, but, you know, 46. There was a part of me that says, why don't I have like a house? Or why is there two vacuum cleaners in our podcast? That's really funny. Why? Why is there a closet right here? Why doesn't anything, nothing works in this house? Nothing. There's no outlets that work here. Nothing works. All their sinks are fucking clogged. They're all soiled. Because of your fucking long, no, because of your long fucking

Filipino hair. Why do you put so much Filipino hair? Why would I put hair over the sink? This, dude, if you look at, look at our bathroom sink, it's just hair and water over the sink. You think it's my fucking pubes? It is your pubes. I don't have a lot of pubes, bitch. Show me, show me now. Look, if, okay, look at that. That's a lot of fucking food. I know, but they're on my body. They're not released. We're saying that this stuff has been released and been clogging shit. What are you reaching out for? We're trying to write a time code in case I have to blur any video. No, you don't blur pubes. You're not blurting pubes. You're not going to blur it. You're going to blur pubes, bro? Wait, so wait, are you guys actually going to

buy a house soon? I think so. I don't know. It depends. It fucking depends, man. Don't stress me out right now, dude. I'm just excited. Tell them what you did when you saw Seth Meyers at this party. Oh, it was so embarrassing. So you know how Stevie, when, okay, years ago, we were at milk? What's his name? Was there milk? No, the milk. There was an ice cream place called Milk. Oh, yeah, the restaurant. Right. In LA. And he saw, what's that chubby kid with the glasses that was in? Andy Monacas. No, that he was in that John Abbott town movie. Jonathan Hill? Jonah Hill. So we're at, who's that chubby kid? I don't know. Oscar nominated Jonah Hill. Yeah, yeah, but at the time. Yeah, he was fat. Yeah. Yeah. So he saw Jonah Hill and my brother was,

we were talking to him and we were talking and hanging out. And then when Jonah went to the bathroom, I go, that guy's Jonah Hill. You know that, right? And when Jonah came back, my brother bowed out of nervous. Yeah, he bowed and he did a thing. He did like a triangle thing. Illuminati. Yeah, like Illuminati thing. And he did that, like, because he was so nervous. What the fuck? Right. So when, so Seth Meyers was at that party Friday night. Tell me what you did. And he, he shook his, he took a, hey, Bobby, right? And I took his hand and I did this. You blessed his hand. Yeah, like he is the fucking Pope. How did he react? Nothing. He just kind of pulled away and laughed and then, you know, and I'm like, what did I do

that? That's a sign of reverence though in the Philippines. It's a monopole. Yeah, I felt like I needed to do that, but I don't know why I did that. And I've been thinking about it ever since. I don't ever want to do that again. Just shake the man's hand. I know, but I'm afraid of what I'm going to do if I've ever met Barack Obama. What would you do? He goes, hello, and I get on my hands and knees and I open my mouth. Bobby, you're gonna get up. I would literally suck his dick. No, you wouldn't. Barack Obama? Oh, he would. So would you Gilbert. Barack Obama? Yeah, dude. You wouldn't? No, I would not. George would. I would. I would not suck it. Leader of the free world, you wouldn't. What are you talking about? I eat Michelle Obama's clitoris. Would you suck

Barack Obama's dick? What a coward. You're a real coward. You would, George? Yeah. Yeah. I feel like you're a real man, George. I ran into him. I ran into him. I feel like you're a real man, George. As if before this, I didn't think you were. I ran into somebody the other day that I really respect and he said, I'm not going to say his name, but he says he met a girl and we're talking about, he's like, he's in love and stuff. And then we were talking about it and he goes, um, I go, are you in love? He's like, I'm in love. And then he goes, I go, how old is she? Because he's 50. He goes, he's 20. I go, oh, wow. Fresh. That is it. Fresh, right? Fresh brothers. I go, you want to date him or date her or like be serious? I think he's here. Hold on. Not this friend,

though. No, no, we're talking. He's running 15 minutes. He's running 15 minutes late. Perfect. It's okay, buddy. You don't, you don't have to come. Hey, it's okay, man. It's okay, buddy. You have to show up. So he goes, I go, are you going to have babies? He goes, she can't have one. I go, oh, what accident? What happened? She was born that way. No, she goes, no, she has a penis. Because he had showed me a photo of her before and she was hot. Like stunning. Like a body, her body and her face. I'll be honest with you. I got a little, a little aroused a little bit. I feel like that's your dream situation, a hot chick with a dick. I feel like I'm kind of close because I have like a jawline of a man. So I have doodish androgynous features and I have a flat chest. Remember when

I had big breasts, you were like, oh, you need to take those out. You have a huge clit too, so maybe. I have a very huge bulging clit. I have a very small clit. I don't get it. I totally get it. I have a little dick. Do you notice when I see your posey, I suck it like a dick? Full hand? With a full hand? I don't know what he does. It's like, why is he going up and down? I do do that, don't I? Actually, in a book, you're supposed to do that. You're supposed to treat it like a dick. That's what I read too, right, Gilbert? That's what I read too, dude. You're supposed to act like you're sucking a dick. So all those young guys out there, do that. Yeah, just do that. Do that. No, I don't, I'm not into that, but the way he was describing it, I was just like,

if I wasn't with Klyla and this person was super, like we hit it off and I didn't know, I wouldn't do it before. If I knew like, if the first line is I have a dick, like on some sort of like dating app or something, you know, those messages, right? I'd just be like, yeah, but if I, she never said anything and then I took her on a date and I really liked her a lot and we were hanging out for weeks and then one day she just says, I have a dick. I don't know. I think that you would be okay with that. My parents wouldn't be, that's what I would think. You wouldn't tell your parents dumbed up. You don't tell your parents about her clit. You just adopt the kid that's a halfie and then. No, if I go, mom, don't you love

Sandy? She's good. I like her. And I'd be like, she has a dick. What? Like, I don't know what would happen. Yeah. I think my dad would die. No. He would die right then and there. No. I mean, would you date a chick with a dick, George? No. Why? What if you got to know her for like three months? That's what I'm saying. And you really start to fall in love with her. Nah, just too weird. What do you mean? And I want to have a family at some point, you know? Yeah, but you can adopt. Yeah. Adopt things like the way better option. What if there's a technology by then where you can use both your sperms as transferred to your butts and you can have a child? Whoa. Let's explore that for a second. George, answer it now. Still no, but I don't have a good reason to have political

reasons for it. Yeah. I bet your money it's religious, right? I've got some still some things for my religious upbringing. Oh, I know. I know you do, but... You know, I went to a visa with three of my guy friends. And one of my guy friends came home at five in the morning. We all shared an apartment with the hottest, tallest, blondest chick. And I was like, whoa. He never usually pulls girls like this. And he was all excited. And then they walk over to the bathroom. I'm sleeping in the living room couch. They walk over to the bathroom. You know, they turn the lights on. Two minutes later, they turn the lights off. He escorts her back to the door and he waves and he says goodbye. And I was like, dude, what happened? And he's like, I don't want to talk about it.

I don't want to talk about it. Yeah. The next morning, he tells us, he's like, I'm so confused because I was fingering her all night on the dance floor. And then when I went back to the bathroom where she had a dick. And I was like, I think you were fingering her asshole the whole time. He doesn't know where the asshole is located. He was very drunk. And we were, everyone was on drugs. Still feeling dick on here. Number one, why is it so dry? Number two, it's a really tight vagina. The assholes were very tight. Yeah. Also, why is there large clumps of shit on my dick? Yeah, it's fine. It's fine. Yeah, that's weird. That's really weird. But beautiful, beautiful chick though. I'm telling you guys, I was like, whoa, she's hot. You know what I would do is I

would do, I would probably just go, okay, let's see, you're the girl. Hey, what's up? No, like, we've, we dated a couple weeks and I don't like the voice. Sorry, I'll change the voice. I hate that voice, right? And we're making out. Damn it. We're making out. Yes, Bobby. You have to stop, right? And just tell me, tell me that you're a guy. Okay, let's make out. So we're making out. No, do more. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Bobby Lee. Yeah, I have to tell you something. What is it? Don't freak out. I'm not going to freak out. No, look at me. I'm looking at you. Now look at my tits. I love them. Now look at me. I love it. Don't freak out. I'm not going to freak out. I'm going to lower my pants a little bit. Okay. Just don't fucking freak out. Okay. You like

me, right? My personality. I love everything about you. My soul. I think we're soulmates. Okay, I'm glad you said that. That's what I'm going to show you. Yeah, show me. And I'm pulling my pants down and I see it. Now I see it, right? I went, this is what I'd say. Pull it back up. Okay, right? Let's make out. No, no, no. I'm going to erase everything you said the last 10 seconds and just suck my dick. Okay, wait, what? Yeah. And so I'm going to pretend I never even heard that part. I get my dick sucked. Okay, fine, I'll do it. And I'll tell everyone. Yeah, I'll tell everyone. Even if they find out, she never told me. I never saw her with a dick. She never said anything. She just sucked my dick. You just said 10 minutes ago that you would definitely

date a chick with a dick. Yeah, I think that's how I would do it, I think. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. I would like block it out of my mind. Interesting. Would you? No, you would never do it. I'd be like, why would you deceive me? You're very traditional, though. Yeah, you're like one children and do all that. Children make you guys. I'm traditional too, man. I want to fucking lawn. I want to fucking have a baby. Okay, to take a live. Is there cupcakes left? Yeah, there are. All right, let's stop now. Let's stop and then we'll wait. We'll be back. We'll be back, guys. Ladies and gentlemen, we have our guest is here and it's the one and only James Vanderbake. Everybody give him a round of applause, everybody. Yeah, baby. James. Yes. Thank you so much for being here. Thank you for my middle

or water. And I wanted you on this for sure, but I didn't want to intrude, you know, because we work together. Yes. On what would Diplo do? Yeah. And I want to start off by, do you remember when we first met? I do. I remember very well. All right, so do you want my bracket? Yeah, everything. Okay, so I'd written this character. Yeah. And Rick Messina, our casting director, sends over a list of people. Yeah. And at the very top is Bobby Lee. And I was like, wait, wait, wait, stop, stop, stop. You've never heard this before. I've never heard this before. So I was, wait, stop, stop, stop, stop. So I was on, I was on the, who was number one? You were. Literally top of list. I was on the road. Literally top of list, bro. Number one. Dr. Ken was not number one. Dr. Ken wasn't even on

the list. He was even on the fucking list, Dr. Ken. Wow. That's great. So go ahead, keep going. I believe he was unavailable. Boo. Boo. No, I'm kidding. Fucking cocksucker. Go ahead. And so, you know, I was familiar with you. I'd known you work. I don't know that I'd seen much scripted stuff, but I googled you. Yeah, yeah. And then I saw you on talk shows. Yeah. And I watched you harassing guests. Oh, touching, touching like local morning hosts sitting on laps, making like grown men very uncomfortable. And I was like, yeah, this is our fucking guy. Yeah. This is who I want. This is who we want. Because I'm based on what's his name? Well, you're kind of an amalgam. Yeah. But what was it? Yeah. Well, Diplo's manager is Asian,

but not all Asian people are the same. That's true. That's true. Thank you. He is a wild Asian. He's a character. But we, I mean, listen, everybody in the show kind of started out inspired by somebody like H. Michael Kroner's character. He plays the Kroner on the character. His character is inspired by a German guy who I met at West's house, Diplo's house. And then this other dude who always wears a suit is like his kind of tour manager guy. So like I'm molded. Same thing with your character, really. Yeah. But, but yeah, so I watched you on YouTube. I'm like, this is our guy. This is it. And Brandon Durmer, who directed every episode, was like my partner in this, completely agreed 100%. We're like, yeah,

Bobby Lee's gotta be Bobby Lee. Who else? There's nobody but Bobby Lee. It has to be Bobby Lee. Everybody. And then, so we made the offer, told Rick Messina, offer to Bobby Lee. Yeah. Damn. And, and you passed. Yes, I passed. Do you know why? I was told money. He was like a dollar. Wow. It was maybe. It was good. It was maybe the shittiest money TV money you'd ever been on. It was fine. What it was is this. Okay, James, listen to me. Okay. Number one, I know who you are. Right. And I was like, oh, him. James Vanderbeek. I like him. I'm not, I'm not feeling the enthusiasm. Say it again. Say it. Say it. Say it. Say it. James Vanderbeek. You're my agent. Oh, there's this new Diplo show with James Vanderbeek.

Bobby, okay. That's a little better. Is that better? That's a little better. And then they said, Brandon Durmer, I didn't know who the fuck that was. Right. I go, how much? And then I go, you know, I just, I got just too much on my plate, which I hadn't really not that much, but I was just like, because of the money, I had to make an excuse, right? So I passed. And then what happened was, I get a call from Andrew Santino. He's been on the podcast. Right. And Santino said, you gotta at least meet him. I go, who? He goes, James and Brandon. I go, all right. And he goes, Brandon's really talented and just meet him. As soon as I met you guys,

as soon as I walked in the door, I was, I was going to say yes. That's awesome. Because number one, I just liked them. Just did the energy. And I didn't know you were going to be there. I thought I was going to just be him. Oh really? I mean, Brandon, right? And then when I saw you there, there he is. And I'm not gay. You know that, right? There was a delay. There was a large delay. Anybody says, you know that, right? Please, please, right? First question my head is, really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not. Okay. I mean, I mean, but let me just say this. All right. I, I go, he's so, like in the person, you're so handsome. Well, thank you. Right. And there was something, you know, here, when white dudes, you don't have

this. You don't have it. You have nothing, you have nothing to do with this. Okay. George, you're ugly. But dude, when white dudes smile and they have the little crows, they, their eyes crinkle, they're the good ones. Oh, there's a bad one. Yeah. Trump doesn't have it. Interesting. When he smile, there's no crows because he doesn't ever smile. It's forced, but he, he's so happy, right? Over his years of being him, right? That he is genuinely happy. So his eyes crinkle, right? And so when he smile, like, oh, fuck, man, I'm going to have to fucking do this because of that dude right there. You know what I mean? So it wasn't sex, dude, it wasn't, I'm not going to suck a dick or nothing like that because you're a family man, but my point one

is, is that I go. I love, I love the family part. It's the family reason I get no fallacious. Damn, I missed out. Yeah. But I was just like, this guy right here, dude, is one of the Good Whites. And you know what? It's new band, the Good Whites. Dude, that's right. So I said, it's a great band name. So then they showed me that little thing that you guys are short. What was it? Yeah. Like a promotional video. It was, that's how the whole thing started. So yeah. So Diplo was doing this mad decent block party tour and his management had asked Brandon Durmer, this young up and coming brilliant music video director to come up with a concept. And Durmer's concept was what did James Vanderbeek play Diplo, but like a dollar shave club type

vibe. And did you know, did you know him at the time? I didn't know Durmer at all. Wow. Because you kind of, same kind of same kind of thing came to me out of the blue with no fucking money. I mean, like nothing because they were there. It was just like his management was like writing the check to go make the commercial for the thing. Right. But I had heard Diplo on the radio like a couple of years earlier talking about how he made music and he's talking about fusing like Latin beats, but like reggaeton and like all this. And I was like, wow, that guy's kind of a genius. Yeah. So I just flagged him as like somebody to watch. So when it came in and it was Diplo, I was like, well, I mean, shit, it's, I mean, I, you know, I usually get paid for something like

that, but I'll be associated with Diplo. Like he's like, dude's amazing. Yeah. So I met with Brandon, loved him. And I said, you know, are you open a like notes on the script? And he goes, well, I'll just send it to the FDX file, like the final draft file, which is doesn't really ever happen. Like, yeah, director who's written something is like, oh yeah, you can just just rewrite it. Which I did and sent it to him. He's like, yeah, it's great. So we went out and shot it, had a really great time. And then, and then Vice-Sen came to us and said, we think this is a series. Wow. And that's when I was like, it's not a series. It's not a series. Like I like, the only reason I took the call with Dermot was because he was so nice. I had such a good experience with him. I was like,

Brandon, you know, I know you're excited because, you know, you get to direct a series, but I just didn't see. And then that night, I just thought, let me give it a chance. I went to my pool house, I put on some Diplo on my headphones, like had some wine. I was like, wait a minute, this is, you have a pool house? Totally a series. Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. You a fucking pool house? No, there's, there's no bathroom. So basically, let me say something. You have a pool. I have a pool. Okay. You have a swimming pool. Yes. And the swimming pool, there's a house. There's a, there's a structure that's separate, right? Separate. And you can, and you can just relax in there. As long as there's no tiny little Vanderbeek banging on the door. Right. Wow. So

you have some wine, you're back there, you're listening to some Diplo. All the tiny Vanderbeeks were asleep. Wow. And yeah. And so that was like, this is, this, yeah, and I mean, I've said this a lot, but it's like, this is EDM Jesus sucks at life. Yeah. And I thought this would be a really cool way to examine like the truth about life, especially because it's for vice, it's for vice land. Their whole thing is kind of truth. And by the way, fuck you. Like, I think that's our actual slogan. Yeah, yeah. And so I thought this would be a really cool way to like, find the truth through the eyes of a clown. Yeah. Cause Diplo is really, he's very like childlike and there's a kind of cool like charm to him. And he's a DJ at the end of the day. So like, you can't take yourself

too seriously. Yeah. So I was like, let's, you know, do this, write it, find the truth, and then just lay your stupidity on top of it. Right. So that was the, that was. Mind you, I had never heard of Diplo. Oh, really? Ever? Number one, when I, when I got the cargo, what the fuck is a Diplo? Really? Right. And number two, this is funny. One time we were shooting and I don't think you did this. You go, hey man, check, come over here. So you put me in a room. Yeah. And you put on like a Diplo song. Uh-huh. Check this. He made this for us, you know what I mean, whatever. Yeah. And I didn't know what the fuck it was. Because you just don't listen. I just don't listen to that kind of music. Interesting. Yeah. So I wish I had that same kind of enthusiasm that you

did. Right. I'm sorry that I don't bring that to the table, my friend. All good. As you bring, you've been okay. All right, good, good, good. You've been quiet enough. Yeah. But now I know who he is. Yes. I know who Ioko is and all that stuff. Ioko? So I love it. I'm talking about Aoki? Whatever. Whatever. Aiko. So you're in there and then you, you're in the pool house and then with the next day you call and go, let's do it. Yeah. I called and I was like, I know how to do this. I think I know how to do this. And I pitched it out and I was like, if you let me write it, run it, I'll star in it and we can go like pitch it to vice. And so I totally leveraged my involvement to get my first show running gig. That's what it is. Yeah. That's what it was.

That's great. It's so funny because you and Brandon, that's how you say it. Brandon. Brandon. I call him Brandon. Well, he's too polite. He's too Midwest to tell you. But has he ever said that I'm saying his name wrong? I think you always called him Brandon on set. I never called him Brandon when the show first this started and the beginning of the podcast. I think the Brandon thing is a recent development. But he said something? No. He's never said anything. I think you've always called him Brandon. Okay. Thank God. Yeah. Oh my God. Thank God. Yeah. There was this guy named Jim. I'm at TV and I called him Andy for four years. I called him Andy for four years every fucking day. Andy! He never said anything. He must have been from the Midwest too. Right? And then

four years later, we're on a party. He goes, you know, that's not my name, right? I go, what the fuck? Four years you didn't tell me? Yeah. I worked with somebody for five and a half years and called him like season one. He had a name on a coffee cup that wasn't his. And I called him that name for five fucking years. Yeah. Somebody was like, yo, that's that's not his name. He's like, what? I called him for five fucking years. And he never said anything. He never said anything. Wow. Why don't they say something? I think he maybe he was just confused. But I was calling him somebody else's name who was on the crew. But it also wasn't like a proper name. I forget what it was. Yeah. It said it was kind of a nickname. So. Oh, I see. But still. And then he did he say something eventually or

no? He never said anything. He never said anything. So then I finally started calling him. And then like I realized the reactions I got from him were like, oh, he was also an attendant. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But probably for like four years, we thought he was a dig. Probably thought I was a little asshole. So then you had you had a meeting with Spike Jones, right? In New York? Yeah. So that was so yeah. So they were like, so we were waiting for the offer, whatever I'd met with Nick Weidenfeld, whose idea it was to make a series. And then I was like, well, where's the offer? They're like, well, Spike has a few questions. Like, what the fuck does Spike TV have to do with this? I thought it was a vice. They're like, no,

Spike Jones. Whoa. Spike motherfucking Jones. Yeah. They're like, yeah, some questions you're going to send them by email. I'm like, no, I'll fly to New York to meet with Spike Jones. I love Spike Jones. Yeah. So Brandon and I both flew ourselves out on our own dime and then went in and pitched for like two and a half hours. So about a quarter of the way through the meeting, Spike was like, great, I love it. So what do we need? Do we need a showrunner? Is that what we need? And I was like, no, I'm going to do it. And he goes, great. And then I spent the next three quarters of the meeting convincing him that I was the only guy who could run the show. And so I'd already, I'd had episodes written. I didn't tell him that. Yeah. I had the world

beat out. I had the characters pretty much dialed in and just in the tone specifically, like I just figured for the money we had, we weren't going to get a better showrunner really. Yeah. It's like to kind of like go out and try to grab somebody and get them excited about Diplo and excited about the world. Like it was just something that kind of came through me and just all that momentum. And I'd been writing for a while. So I'd been ghostwriting for myself for a while. So I just thought, you know what, fuck it, man, let's just try it. Yeah. And also it's like, here's, you want to, you want to get into that world of being a showrunner and a producer and whatnot. And this, it's fell in your lap. And I feel like you're a good dude

and it happens for people that are, you know, these things just happen, work out. Have to study Diplo and study the world of EDM. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. It was EDM. Electronic dance music. That's EDM. I thought EDM was a fucking DJ. I swear to fucking god. I don't know how to write EDM. With Enoko? Yeah. With Enoko. I saw Enoko at Atlanta. I've told the story before. Tell it again, please. I was in a hotel and Enoko, what is it? Ayoke. Ayoke. Whatever. He goes, what's up? To me. And I saw, I knew, I vaguely knew who he was. He picked me up like I was a little baby and he's a skinny. Do you see Japanese?

Yeah. He's Japanese. He's half though, right? Yes. Yeah, they're so white in there too. Yeah, yeah. And he picked me up like a little baby and then, you know, we took a photo and stuff, but he was very nice, but I don't know anything about him. No, that's not the story. What was the story? The story was you were so kind of happy. You were starstruck a little bit because you pretend you don't know his name, but you know exactly who Steve Ayoke is. And so you saw him at the airport. I didn't see him at the airport. I saw him at the hotel. Or the picture was at the hotel? Yes, that's the part of the story. Okay, listen, I lie a lot. I lie a lot. I make up things. All right. So let's go back. Let's go. Let's get to the truth of the story.

The truth of the story is this. He then took the photograph and wanted to brag to me about meeting Steve Ayoke. Stop, stop. That's where that's where it is. That's what it is. Number one, I was right. I vaguely knew who he was, but I knew who he was. Okay. I saw him at the thing. I did. At first it wasn't like, Oh, there's Steve Ayoke. All right. So then when he goes, it's Steve Aoki. And I, and I go, I knew that she in her Vegas days would go and see her shows. Yeah. And like fucking rubber fucking little fucking clip while watching his shows because she had a little crush crush, right? But did you meet him in an airport or a hotel? Yeah. That's the main hotel, James. I haven't heard a word you've said since then.

It's just been bugging me. Yeah. It was in a hotel. Okay guys, then exchange numbers. We do exchange numbers. Yeah. And then what happened? I don't remember. What was it? What happened was you were trying to brag to me that you had just met Steve Ayoke. Yeah. And then instead of sending me the text, the taunting text, you sent it to Steve Ayoke. I remember now. Yes. And then you had to apologize and say, Oh my God. I was bragging to brag into my girlfriend that I met Steve Ayoke and all that stuff, but I sent it to him. That's fucking right. And then I had to go. I'm so sorry. It was for my girlfriend. I remember that. That was so embarrassing. I blocked it out, babe. You know, you know, his dad found it.

Benihana, right? What? What? That's his favorite place on earth. That's a real thing. So now you're even more embarrassed. Do you like Benihana? I did until I realized that everything tasted like ginger. It's kind of true. I like ginger. Like the lobster tastes the same as the chicken. In the steak. At the end of the day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because it's all just ginger. Or maybe I went to, maybe the one I went to in Encino wasn't exactly the highest quality. Encino. It's a really good one though, Encino. Is it? Yeah, very good one. Maybe I just, maybe I had a bad chef. So the show, critical. Yeah. Like I saw Variety had a good overview of LA Times, New York Times. Yeah, man. I was shocked because it was, I was so all in on it and it was, it's a lot. It's the first time I've

done a lot of these things. And so, you know, like the whole process was like inspiration, enthusiasm is going to work. Oh my God, it's going to be great. And then, well, is this going to, and then all of a sudden you're like, is any of this going to work? Oh my God. Like I had that process in the writing. Yeah. I had the process in the edit, the shoot on the set. I fucking love. That was like, that was so much fun with you guys. But you know what? Also, I felt like I didn't feel the kind of stress that I normally feel. That was the happiest I'd ever seen you. Yeah, I felt I felt like I can't wait. Like right now on this show that I'm doing now, I just, I'm consumed with anxiety on a daily basis. It doesn't, maybe that'll come when I know that it's going to work,

but it's like there's a sense of anxiety that I don't like. I can't sleep. You know, but with Diplo though, it was like, I can't wait to go because I like seeing everyone. And it's also so that there was the kind of pressure wasn't there. I could just have fun. Yeah. And create things with them and just ad-lib. Like here on this thing I'm doing now, I can't ad-lib. I had to read what they wrote. Did you guys improvise a lot? Yeah. Oh cool. And they gave that, they gave that permission in a sense. They never said it really, but you could feel that, you know, that was allowed or whatever. And you guys are great at it too. And that was one of the things I really want to do is like, write the scenes and structure the scenes in a way so that when we

hired people who could improv, they would come in and like there was something to chew on. Yeah. And so, you know, maybe we just cast it right. You did. But we did for sure. With H. Michael, I mean he's a groundling guy. He's so fucking great. So funny. He's my favorite. He's my favorite. Yeah. He's, I call him my scene saver. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He comes, he will elevate anything. Yeah, he's so good. Like come up with a better joke and you're like, yes. And that was the fun part was like, because I always feel like jokes that I write are like placeholders anyway. So when people come in and they do something better, to be in a position where you can be like, yes, that's it. We're going with that as opposed to as an actor when you're

on a set and somebody comes in with a great improv and you're like, oh my God, that's amazing. And then somebody else is like, well, I don't know. Can we just do it the other way to make sure we have it? Yeah. And you're like, oh, and you could feel the enthusiasm go, and I could tell when you came into that room, into the writer's room to meet us, I could tell you were like traumatized by some sets that you've been on about like having to do it exactly the way it's supposed to be, the pressure and you're not doing it and directors not knowing how to talk to you or like, I felt like when I saw, my impression when I saw you was like, I wonder if this guy, I mean, you has been like appreciated to the degree that you should be

on a set. And that's why I was really excited to create an environment where, you know, with Brandon, of course, because Brandon directs it, but where the two of us could create a place where you guys could run free and be like, best idea wins and everybody feel comfortable and happy and like it's supposed to be, man. You get better shit that way. Yeah. You know, I've been traumatized for so long that like when I walk in there, I was like, you know, it's like, you know, it's a rape victim. Wow. Not like that. Yeah. I was spiritually raped. Spiritually. So I'm spiritually raped, right? This is the guy who showed me his penis. Our first reaction. You see his penis? Yeah. It's Korean. Hello. All right. And that, let me see something right now. I'll never see his.

So I have to show them mine. That's how life works. That's how life works. Delicate balance. That's it. I wanted to ask you though, how old were you when you had got Dawson's? 20. 20. And that was your first big job or no? I had been auditioning for five years by that point. 62. You were 16. 15. I was 15 when it started. It took me a year and a half to get anything. I'd been working in theater in New York when I was 16. So like 16 to 20, I'd done like a bunch of theater. I'd done a couple of movies and then yeah, and then I got that at 20. So that, I mean, obviously that's a life changer. Yeah. That changed everything. Instantaneously. When did you meet your wife? Which one? You were married twice. Yeah. I was married once before this. The four kids that

you have now, are they with my current wife? The current Mrs. Vanderpeek. Oh, wow. So when, the first one, who did you marry the first time? I married a great girl that, no, she's great. She's great. She's great. What did it work out then? It just, it just really didn't, some things just don't work out. All right. I was young. She was young and like you kind of, was she an actress? Yeah. Famous. I don't want to know what it is, but she's famous. Okay. I mean, not famous. She's good. Really good. Yeah, she's good. Yeah. Really good. And then, but yeah, it just didn't work as a marriage. We were best friends and we were like this. And then it was like, oh, wait, this, but the time we finally realized like, wait a minute, maybe this doesn't

have to be a marriage. It was like, oh, wow, we could be friends now. Thank God. We don't have to like, so it was, it was. Was it in your 20s? Yeah. Yeah. Did you, I was just wondering, I don't want to ask a question. I'm so sorry. You don't have to answer it if you don't want to, but because, you know, you want, just let me hear me out. All right. Yes. You're on Dustin's Creek. You're married, right? But did you ever go on a pussy frenzy? You seem like a guy that wouldn't go on a pussy frenzy. I just, no, not really. I mean, listen, when I was single. Yeah, that's when I'm 30. Between your marriages, did you go on a fucking frenzy? I mean, not a, I wouldn't go on a frenzy. It's a frenzy. Well, can you explain what a frenzy

looks like? You're on a jog. Crystallia. He goes on a poly short. They go on frenzy. Frenzy. So multiple in one day. Sometimes three in one day. Sometimes. Oh my goodness. Yeah. You don't seem like somebody that would go on a pussy frenzy, but I need to ask you because here's what it is. You're good looking. You're famous. You're a talented guy. And I was, because here's what it is. Yeah. Here's what it is. This dude, right, has every ability to go on the most massive pussy frenzy that you'll never get, my friend. You lipless fuck. You'll never get it. And you pink fuck. You'll never get it either. You don't have the eyes for it. This guy right here, right? He had the opportunity and it's like this. It's like Wolverine not using his claws ever.

Oh, restraint. Yeah. He was restrained full. Is that a good word? Is that a good word? Okay. So you never went on a pussy frenzy? No, no. I, but I don't know that that makes me a good person. It does. It does. I just, it's kind of the way I'm built, but especially by the time I was like, by the time I was single, I was like a fully domesticated male. Like I was a shitty dator because all I knew how to do was be married. So I'd be like, so how was your day? You know? Like I didn't know how to, I knew how to be married to somebody. I didn't know how to like, I need to stand for a second. This guy's the exact opposite. I'm the opposite. I stand when I have to make a point. Okay. What I'm saying is this though, right? Yes. Is that you were,

it's in your upbringing. You were born that way. You're not. So do you get credit for it if you were born that way? No, no. I'm just saying that it's like you come from the good whites. It's like, there was a lot of them. Lincoln. Yeah. So Jay Brown Lincoln, he never went on a pussy frenzy, right? Well, I don't know. I never know. I never know. But my point is, who else is something like him? Andrew Hamilton. What? Basically all the founding fathers. By the way, Hamilton went on a pussy frenzy. Yeah. Shut the fuck up. You don't know history. I just watched the musical. But if you know the musical, you know that George Washington's wife named her feral Tomcat after Alexander

Hamilton. There was a joke in there. Huh? Did he fuck or whatever? Yes. It's true. Yeah. All the time. Really? Yes. Really weird. My point is that you know, but Lincoln didn't know his wife. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. I saw the movie. I saw Daniel Day Kim. Wait. Daniel Day Kim as Abraham Lincoln. He could do it if he wants. You're going to make that movie. He could do it if he wants. That would be the funniest thing I've ever seen. And then I could play like his son. Yeah, I could play a son. Yeah. As long as you can ad-lib. Yeah. So you got, you married and then you, in your 30s, you were single and then you met your wife. Yeah. How'd you meet her? I was in Israel. I was on a trip in Israel. She's from Washington state. I'm from

Connecticut. We were both on like an organized trip. I thought you married a Jew. Is she Jewish? She, we, you know, we did the 23 in me. She's actually 0.4 percent. Well, that's so am I, though. So you met her in Israel. Yeah. So I had been, so I'd been married, had been single, and I reached a point on my single the more I was like, I'm fucking done. Like I'm done with the text at four in the morning. Like I want to meet somebody. I want a relationship. I want a life. I want a family. I was having this realization as I was on the plane and I was in Israel, like the first day of the trip and we were in Jaffa, which overlooks Tel Aviv. I've been there, bud. Jaffa. Jaffa. And so I was telling a friend of mine because he was like walking ahead of the

group. So like ran up and like, Hey, dude, I had this revelation. Like I want a woman somebody I can grow with somebody I could build a life with. And in the middle of telling him this, somebody like wanted to ask him a question. Like, excuse me, I have a grin. I'm like, who the fuck is interrupting me in the middle of me telling that I want to meet my soul. Oh shit. She's hot. And it was my, it was my wife. Oh my God. Interrupted in the middle of saying it. Your life is a fucking rom-com. You're lying. That shit happens in the movie. Me cutes. He's talking about it. Excuse me. Right. And then that's the one. I just find that happens in everything in my life. I just talk about it. It falls in my lap. I don't know, man. You know what? It's what happens in the

fucking GWs, man. Yeah, the GWs. Yeah. But let me say something. So you matter. And then what happened? And then, um, is this too personal? I really love, I'm really, I don't know. It's you. I love it. Yeah. I want to know. Um, yeah. So we met and then it was like super. I mean, if you really want to know, like, it was like super intense. We bought on a very deep level. We're like in Israel. We're going to spiritual sites. We're like, did you know who you are? Yeah, but you didn't watch the show. Yeah. Yeah. Neither one of the women I married ever watched. And so, yeah. So we were, we just like bonded really deep, really. And then it was the one, like this, it was, so it's different than like most relationships in that we both knew what this

could be right away. And so we were like, let's not burn out. So we actually actively had to be like, okay, we're not going to talk on the phone for four hours a day, every day. We actually like, did these like periods of like restriction where we didn't talk for like a week. Just because it was like, I had shit to figure out. You know what I mean? Like I had to pull my life together. I had to pull my career together. She was, she was going places. This girl's smart. And like, in that time period, this is in your thirties, right? So we're talking after Dawson's Creek. It was just, you did an CSI kind of a show, right? That was later. That was after you met her. So there was, was there a period where you weren't working? Yes. Yeah. We all go

through that. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. There's periods where I wasn't working. This period was like, wow, what is, what can I do? There are periods where I did bad TV movies just to like make a little coin. Yeah. I mean, which listen, there are a lot of people struggling a lot harder than making a shitty Christmas movie up in Vancouver, you know, to make, to make ends meet. But um, but yeah. When you did stuff like that, did it depress you? I, at the time, it was kind of my way out of depression. It was almost like therapeutic. Like, you know what? And what I learned from those jobs is like, if I can't show up to set and be happy to be on a set, be happy to be earning money and like be happy to just be adding value

on a movie that I wish nobody will see, then how am I ever going to be, be able to handle being on a set on something that I'm proud of? Because really it shouldn't like, what people think of the end product or how impressed they are with you should matter. Absolutely not at all when you're on that set. Yeah. And so I took it as like a real boot camp in just learning to fucking assassinate my own ego and get the fuck over myself and just show up and add value and be happy doing it. Yeah. That's exactly what you need to learn, Bobby. Yeah. It's a Dalai Lama, guys. A real GW. You learn, you live and you learn, but let me say something, man. Yes. What the fuck? I mean, you nailed it on the fucking button there, man. It's like, I have to, I need more

gratitude in my life, man. That's what it is. Assassinate the ego, Bobby. I have to assassinate the ego, you know, and whatever he said. I'll rewind it and say it. Yeah, and tape. Like write it down. New Life Mantra. So then you, you, so she was living Connecticut or where was she living? Washington. Washington. Well, no, she was in between Palo Alto and Los Angeles because she was a strategic advisor for a philanthropic billionaire at the time. Oh gosh. Yeah, she's smart. Yeah. And so you guys, when did that start? We, we were married a year after meeting. So you guys did this whole practicing a little bit of restraint where you wouldn't talk for a week. Yeah. And then when you would see each other, it obviously feel like it was crazy.

It was intense again. I feel like maybe that's sort of the way to go to kind of, it was bonkers. Yeah. It was like, like really building desire. And then like one of the times we did it, it was like the hardest time of my life, but I got so much done, but it was like, there was not a minute that went by where I wasn't like, I want to fucking marry this girl. Wow. Like I, it built so much appreciation and we did it like, you know, very consciously. It wasn't like we had a fight and like, oh, we should take some time off. It was like, listen, let's not be stupid. Yeah. Let's like really, and, and then we got back together and we never like not together, but we just like felt like, okay, here's like, here's, here's where I'm at. It's on. Let's do it. And then we got

pregnant right away. And I got married and then yeah. And you have four? Yeah. It just, is that it? You're gonna do more? I don't know. Six. I don't know. No, no, no, no, no. Four is enough. Well, five, like, I don't know. Five is what? I could do five. I could do five, but also like, how many boys? How many girls? Poor woman needs break. Yeah. Really. She's amazing. Yeah. Um, I don't know how she does it. I really don't. It's a girl, boy, girl, girl, girl. So three girls and a boy. Yeah. Yeah. And it's, is it, I mean, because I talked to Sebastian on the other day about his baby and it's life altering. They love it. Well, you love it? Oh, yeah. I mean, it's why it's you. You want kids. I know. But he wants kids, but he doesn't want to take care of them.

Shut the fuck up. I'm literally, okay. I literally, so I'm, listen, I, I hate talking about kids for people who don't have them because you end up like waxing poetic about like, how amazing and life changing. You don't really know who you are. And then other people, he doesn't, people who don't have kids are like, fuck you. Yeah. Dude, like my life is like, I feel like, like people, some people should have kids. Some people shouldn't. I just, I've known that I've wanted them for a long time and I just, all right, here's the story. So when I, when, when my wife gave birth to my daughter leading up to it, I was like, I knew I wanted it. I wanted to have children with this woman so badly. I was so excited. But then there's also like, all right,

I'm going to have to change a diaper. I'm going to have to, you know, get up in the middle of the night. The second I met my daughter, I went, oh my God, you, like, you are who I've been missing. Like I've been like that. No wonder I had like little moments of depression. Like no wonder I was sad when I was a kid. Like I had to wait 33 years to meet you. It was like instantaneous. So then all that like, I need to shit went away and it was like, I just wanted to. I mean, that's what it's missing in my life. No, don't fix you. I've lost you. No, you can't. I ain't going to meet our baby. I got to meet her. Oh my God, just look at it. This is what he's seeing. I will say though also, I'm literally

this morning, I was in the park and I was working out and this guy came up and I was at his life. He lives in a fucking rom-com. He's not the life that you leave. I know it definitely. He lives in it. He's only going to sell more rom-com until I get to the punchline. But I had a football there and this guy, this guy was walking, had a baby in a stroller. My letterman jacket was on the ground. And he did baby in a stroller and he was like, Hey, do you want to throw? I was like, Yeah, dude, let's throw. So we had a catch and I was like, how old is your baby? And he's like four months. And I was like, Oh, wow. I was like, you are in it. I mean, congratulations. He's like,

Yeah, thanks. And I said, I got, I got four myself. And he goes, Wow, that sucks. And I was like, I'm laughing because like, he was so sleep deprived. Yeah. And I know exactly where he is. Like, because that's what happens. Yeah. And the thought of four kids to this poor man was like, No way. It just came out of his mouth. I don't think he meant to say it. Yeah. And it wasn't judgmental. I was like, Wow, that fucking sucks. I've got to deal with four of these little fuckers. Yeah. And so I actually wrote something on Instagram today that like, yeah, there are times like it's fucking sucks sometimes, like you're woken up constantly, you are constantly worried, pain, you feel more deeply than before you worry about the world

in a way you didn't before. Like the environment. Yeah, the environment, the world, the anger, you're like, I can't watch fucking Game of Thrones. I can't watch people get their heads chopped off anymore. You've never seen Game of Thrones? No, I watched the first episode. I'm like, Nope, push a kid out the window. My wife and I are like, Okay, next. So don't go to strangers house. So, but I will say, I mean, I it's so worth it on like a deeper level that you really can't convey to somebody doesn't have kids. No, you did. That's all. No, you actually did. You actually did. Thank you. You actually did. And I get it. Yeah, whatever you're saying, I get it. Now we live in regret. No, we were. We killed, we killed you. We killed you, James.

We aborted you, James. Well, you know, we killed you. It's, it's legal. I know, but what I'm saying is that I should have. We killed you. We fucked it up. Our lives could have changed. Oh, it's why do you make me do that? Well, if you're not ready, you're not ready. You know what I mean? Look at you're ready. He had nothing to do with not wanting them. It was circumstantial. I wasn't well. She wasn't well. God. All right. Well, yeah, I listen, you get no judgment from me, my friend. Yeah. Although my goal is to make everybody here feel worse. But I just want to make everybody feel shitty about it. I'm ready. I want one. We love it. We love it. Okay. Because I'm getting insight from you, right? So here's what we've learned. This is what we've learned. Pool houses

have no bathrooms. His pool houses don't have no bathrooms. Right. All right. Number two, you, you live in a rom-com. Number three, things just happen to you. The magical things just happen to you. Yeah. You're a dream weaver. I'm a dream weaver for sure. And then and this like the show, the show just happened to you. It did. But I mean, yes, no, it did. I was very, very lucky. It was a lot of work. I know. But you know what? It was, you know what? I'd never seen anything like it. It was its own show. And I was very skeptical in the beginning. Yeah. You know, I was definitely happy that Bobby partook because, you know, I knew who I know who Diplo is. I know everybody, you know, in the EDM world. Yeah. So I was happy. I was excited for him to be a part of

it. Yeah. Oh, that's cool. But when I watched the show, I was surprised at how cool. And I was really excited. I told you, okay, you can't because Santino said this kid, Brandon, can make a dollar look like a million dollars. Yes, you can. That's the most important fucking thing. And his crew is amazing. Amazing. Right. So I knew that, right? You have a great lead, nice guy, creative guy. You have Brandon, Brandon, Brandon, Durmer, right? So I already knew my thing is who's going to watch Vice Land. Nothing against Vice. I love Vice. I love the company. I love Spike Jones. But I don't even know what channel it is. Right. Most people don't. Yeah. So that was, if it was on, if it aired on Netflix, right? Or, you know, HBO or anything. I felt like Vice Land was a perfect, is a perfect

home for it, though. It is. But what we're like, we can't talk about the future of the show. Yeah. Because nothing's etched in stone. But I think something great is going to happen with it. Right now you can watch it this week. Yes. Right. Where? For free on viceland.com. So usually if you go to viceland.com or you get the Vice Land app through iTunes, you enter your cable subscription information, you can watch it. This week, you don't have to have a cable subscription. So if you're unplugged. If you're listening, you know what I mean? The people that are listening right now, you're a Tiger Belly fans. You're a Bobby Lee fan. You're not James Van Der Beek. Now you're a Van Der Beek fan. You have to give it a shot because, you know, the way we continue

with our lives is we all want to feel joy. And we all just hear me out, Gilbert. I don't hear your face. Sorry. All right. Because I'm improvising here. All right. So just don't smile when I talk. All right. You flat face fucking jungle. Thank you. Okay. Your face is a desert. It's flat. I got it. Yep. Okay. No, I'm not. You can't be a jungle and a desert. So choose one. That's true. True. You're a jungle. Thank you. Jungle gook you are. You're huge for sure. Okay. I love your people though. Thank you so much. You guys smoke. Thank you. You don't even to chill. You smoke like this. Squatting. You smoke squad. You cook like that too. It's great. I love fucking platoon. Great movie. You know, you're not wrong. It was shot in the Philippines,

but definitely not about the Philippines. When you get older though, you're that dude that Kevin Dylan shot in the leg. I turned feet to me. Yeah, you're that dude. All right. I'll take it. So anyway, don't fucking. But what I'm saying, I don't even know what I was saying now. You fucked me up. The show brings joy. It brings joy to here's the other we go. Okay. Here we go. So I think you need a new screen for your iPad. You don't want to not everyone was on nine years on Dustin's Creek. Okay. You fucking bastard. I mean, you're a good wipe. But my point is, is this GW your GW for life. But my point is you really are a good dude. I love you so much. But my point is this is that if you're listening right now, and you're a Tiger belly fan,

you're now a Vanderbink fan, you have to support and then we support you and vice versa. It's a two lane street. That's true. And you could get an iTunes if the if the free window on vice lane is not there or sling. And I have a prediction. I have a prediction that it's going to go either on some sort of like other platform one day. And you're going to be able to watch it that way. But um, right, it's, I know you can't say anything, but some exciting things are happening. Ladies and gentlemen, all right, it did get great reviews. That was the crazy part. I had no, I had no idea what to expect. What I secretly hoped for was like one or two headline reviews, you know, where they can like put above a poster or something. Because I've

done a lot of movies in my career and a lot of projects where people have actually liked things despite themselves, but they've gone out of their way to make sure that there's nothing that you could put. Yeah. Like they carefully were right their way to just like weave in and out of like kind of liking it, but not giving us that. And it was like, we got a ton of those. Yeah, amazing. I read it. And what I loved about it is that I was at a pizza place, right by the comedy store and I was eating and across the street. This is Diplo and it's just James on the poster. So that's cool. Do you know what I mean? Do you know what I mean? No, that's cool. I like it. I did not design the

poster. I'm still a GW. I'm still a GW. I did not design the poster. I have a question. So in Diplo's real life, when he's performing in Vegas, when he has the billboard of him, is his manager on that billboard? She got you dead to rights, bro. First of all, you guys are misinterpreting what I just said. Oh, no, we're not. We've interrupted it. And I resent the accusation to be honest with you. What I said, you can rewind the tape, is that I was eating pizza at Little Joe's, okay? And I was eating it and I look up and I see a billboard with James with a coffee mug, right, with this little gray beanie. And this is what would Diplo do. And this is Viceland and whatnot, right? And I felt joy in my heart. He was the only one on the poster.

Adding that little button, which is a good thing that he was the only one. You know, Dylan Francis is a name too. He's great in it. He's so good in it. He's so good, isn't he? Yeah. He won't text me back, but he's so good. He's a busy dude. Oh, fuck it. We're all busy. All right. We're all busy. Dylan, I didn't know what to expect, because Dylan's a DJ. He's as big as Diplo in a lot of circles. Oh, yeah. And he, when we shot, so we did like a proof of concept thing after the commercial that we showed to Spike Jones, which is a little more tonally in line with what we wanted to do. So like a, so we just, we went to the Madison Block Party and started improving. We threw

me on stage dressed as Wes, dressed as Diplo. And then, but Dylan jumped in and started improving with us. And Dermot was like, you know, we should think of having Dylan. And I'm like, yeah, he's great. And I said, but is he like, is that how it works? Is he really great? And, and Dermot goes like, well, just check out a Snapchat. And I did. And I was like, okay, this guy is super clever. He's so creative. Yeah. And so I wrote this roll form is like this hangar on. Yeah. Super low IQ. Cause like, cause one thing I know about Dylan is he's, he's likable and he's charming. Yeah. And I thought he could be charming like all the way down to like an IQ so low, he's barely functioning. And I didn't really know what to expect. And he crushed it.

Not only crushed it, he is also really just, he, it were, he has comedy energy. Yeah. Like being around a comic, like he really does. I'm like, I didn't, I didn't even know who he was. I thought he was from the ground links too. That's how, yeah. Honestly, I went, oh, they got Michael and they probably got this guy from the ground links. Yeah. I didn't even know he was a DJ until later. I'm, I'm, I'm being completely fucking real with you. When we were at the table read and he jumped in and a bit with H. Michael Kroener held his own. Yeah. I was like, wow. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Damn. Does Brandon Durman do crystal math? No. Why does he look like he does? Like, like, like, like a guy who should, who should be selling you vans?

Yeah. Does he not look like a sketch? I'm not kidding you. If you saw him walking down the street, you would like kind of, you wouldn't check your wallet. No, you wouldn't. He's like a sketchy. He's like a sketch. He's got the kindest eyes. He doesn't have your eyes. The crows. He's, he doesn't have. He's too young. He's a baby. He's a cute. He's a cute. He's a cute. He's a lion. He's a baby. When Fentino was here, you said he looked like he worked at a circle K. He is. He is so unassuming. This is why he's pure. This is my brother. See, that's what I'm saying. You need whites like this. This guy right here is Schindler. If he was in Germany, he would smuggle like 30 of them out in his pocket.

Right? He's one of those. He's not, he's not what Trump, you know what I mean, supports. You know, I just get a bunch of guys like me, we should walk down the street chaining whites like us. Good whites. Good whites like us. You know, but don't get these two in. That wouldn't get misinterpreted. No, no, no, no. Bobby Lee told that. He said, yeah. Is there anything else you want to promote, like a movie or anything? Yeah. I'm like crazy fucking year actually. It's been great. It's been great. I'm in downsizing the Alexander Payne movie. Wow. We're like one scene, but I just saw the trailer for that. I love the concept. It's amazing. It's about people getting shrunk downsizing, right? That's Alexander Payne who did sideways. I know who he is.

And then like, okay, he does marry the the chink from the Arliss. That was my first acting job. Oh, really? Yeah. Sondra was so nice to me. I love Sondra. Yeah. I ran into them once at a fair and they were really kind. I'm sorry for calling you chink. I should have said that. I should have said that. But I think as an Asian, it's like calling you, you know, like if I was black. Nope. I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to do it because I'm going to look at the time. Yeah. Wow. But you get what I'm saying. So my point is this is that so you're in downsizing with Alexander Payne. Yes. For like, yeah, but I think the movie is going to be great. I'm, I mean, it looks amazing for two seconds, but

that's been my career. I always do like one scene in a movie. Yeah. I love it. It's no pressure. It's fun. Interesting. I find it hard to do sometimes. Really? Well, I also, were you nervous? Again, this is, you're going to fucking hit me after this. I started playing leads. So like my, how I learned to act was have a character, start in one place, end in another place, and have like every day on the shooting schedule to like just tweak in little kind of tiny things. Yeah. So when I started doing more like character stuff, which I love, like all the actors I love growing up were like character, more character actors. Right. I realized, oh, wait, you got to make really specific choices and you got to come

in and bring it. And you got to step into an environment where you're not familiar with it every day. Like as a, when you're, you know, like you're playing a leading man, you, you can get in a rhythm. Yeah. You can warm up a little bit. Yeah. You can like, you know, have a scene like, oh, I didn't go, oh, now I found my stride. If you come in for one day, you got to fucking, you got to nail it. I know that's, it's, it's, it's people don't know it's stressful. Yeah. And you don't know, like, if the producer is cool, if the director is competent, you got to make a lot of decisions really quickly. I have a lot of respect for, for anybody who can come in and do that. Were you nervous? I'm always a little bit nervous for

like first day before, like I'm going to go do an episode of Modern Family next week. Oh, wow. Eric Stone Street. Eric Stone Street. Eric Stone, our show. Yeah. I love Eric. I've known Eric for years. He's great. I've known him for way before that show. So I know, and I know Eric, I know Jesse, who I'm working with. I know all the right. I know the producers. I know everybody on there, but there was a moment today when I was like, I was working because I have to learn an accent for it. I was like, I'm a little nervous for this table read. Like I'll be sitting down. It'd be everybody with all their like multiple Emmys and like closet somewhere. The table read. What's the table read? Wednesday. I shoot Wednesday on my show for the first

episode. Oh, really? And I'm really nervous. Yeah. It's, it's good. Nervous. All right. Little butterflies. I don't know what it is. It's just nervous. Yeah. I don't know the difference. It's just, there's you stress and then there's bad stress. The you stress is good. Is mine bad stress? Yeah. Oh, what is my stress like? Your stress is it almost morphs into like a temper tantrum and then it morphs into like a spiraling and a deep depression and then suicidal tendencies. Yeah, that's how I live. Exactly. I literally like, I literally don't know how to function. I like, I lay there and I go, can I get out of this? I can't get out of this. And then he starts getting

all these random boils on his face. Like the day before he has to go on set. It's always like, okay, if he has to work Wednesday tomorrow, the boils will come out. Yeah. Yeah. There are a lot of unknowns when you're just stepping on a set. That's exactly, I like defense. There are so many unknowns. I liked it. That's Schindler right there again. So many unknowns. Yeah. With hair and makeup, wardrobe. Yeah. But the cast, are they going to be weird? Can you improv? Yeah. With ideas. Are they going to be cool with it? One time a guy said to me, a director, and he whispered this in my ear. He goes, hey, it's pretty good. After a take. Yeah. I don't understand a word you're saying right now. Like none of the things you're saying, you're so,

I was so nervous when I was talking, like I was mumbling it, you know, because of my first take. And I hate that. And then you got to, and then you go, oh my God, they don't even, they don't even think I speak English. Why do we even have a foreigner? Oh my. The worst, you know, I like offers. Yeah. But that only in a, in many ways, I'd rather audition because they know what you're going to do. I was offered. So the first comedy I ever did was a failed sitcom pilot. Yeah. And it was, and I was actually cast really well. And I had to read for it. People were like, what? Is he funny? I don't know. And it went in. I was really well cast. It was really well written. And it worked. And people were like, wow, he's funny. And like it was, the show did not get picked

up. But based on the strength of that, I was offered another sitcom the year after no audition. And I was completely miscast in it. And I was not funny. And I was not the guy you should have hired for it. And it was a really painful experience. Like every day, like getting up and just tanking. So like they were the first opening lines director who I love. Was it a live show? It was a three camera? Yeah. Yeah. Multi-camera. So then you didn't get far. You actually shot it. We actually, I was convinced after the table read, like I sat down at the table read. And I was expecting everybody to be like, oh yeah, he was so funny. That's why I'm like,

you can read people's energy. Yeah. You sit down at the table and everybody was like, let me see it. Because I had the, you know, the network, whoever had kind of talked them into hiring me. And so after the table read, I did not get any laughs. And they were like, okay, you guys just hang out for a while. And we're waiting for an hour. I'm like, I'm going to get fucking fired. They're going to fire my ass after the table read. And they didn't. But I got a lot of like, just more energy, you know, try and like being hammered on these first two lines of the sitcom. So I'm like, the sitcom is, I'm at a beer, I'm at a bar, I'm drinking a beer. And there's a TV on

and it's Tom Selleck is on the television. Right. Right. And he's talking about having, he's a disgrace senator who had this affair with somebody. And it's, you know, very funny. So he's talking. And then, you know, I have, and then they cut to me and I have my like, comment line, which is not what I do. I don't do that. Well, there are people who can do it. I marvel at them. Yeah. Not me. Yeah. And so I had like, I'd been hammering him in these lines so hard. I had no like, bearings on what was funny and what wasn't. And so we're at the bar. I give my, Tom is, you know, reading his like, crazy laughter, bringing the house down. Yeah. Cut to me. I give my line. Nothing. Audience. Nothing. Oh my god. Nothing. Not even. Oh my god.

So nervous right now. So like flop, flop, flop immediately. Second line comes in. I'm like, all right, maybe just more energy. That's the key. The best acting notes. Just really hit it harder because I have no instincts at this time. I'm completely fine. How old are you at the time? Probably 19. No. At this point I'm, I was like, 27, 28. Why? After Dawson's. Yeah, it was after. Wow. So, um, so that's, I really give it the old energy. Yeah. Yeah. Even less sound this time. I mean, not even the writer doing the obligatory, ha, you know, where they like laugh at their own jokes. Yeah. No, you'd be like nothing. And I'm like, oh my god, what the fuck with the fuck? And then, um, Jane Krakowski was in this with me.

Jane comes in and she starts bringing the house down. We go to the downstage table. They're loving Jane. Somebody else comes in. They're loving her. I'm like, okay. All right. Well, the show is good. They love Tom. They love Jane. They love everybody else. Um, and so what are you thinking at this time? I'm thinking they're going to write better lines for me. They're going to write something else for me. Yeah. I sit, no, none of the writers are looking at me. No, I don't see like the pitch circle happening on the floor where they like come up with better jokes and what the fuck is going on. And, and I'm waiting and waiting, waiting. Nobody comes up to give me another line and then they go, all right, back to one. And I'm like, you can't make me do this again. Like you can't make me

tank with these lines again. And I'm like getting really fucking freaked out and I'm starting to go out of body. Like the point where it's a traumatic experience where I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna be absent right now and just someone get through this. And they're like, okay. Speeding and Jay Harrington, who was in this, it was sitting next to me at the bar goes, um, oh, did you hear? I said, what? He goes, our mics were off at the top of that. The audience couldn't hear us. Oh my God. I practically collapsed. Wow. Like just the audience could not hear a word I'd said. And I was like, oh, thank God. Oh, man. So then, so then I get to say these lines again. And I got polite laughter from the audience. Look warm, but lukewarm. Um, and the show did not get picked

up, but, um, but you didn't get fired. I didn't. Well, I don't feel like you've ever been fired. I didn't get hired. Have I ever been fired? I've been cut out of things. Me too. Out of movies. Me too. And like for very good reasons, but, um, but yeah, I don't think I've ever been. There's no, you know why? You're too likeable man. You're too likeable brother. Or too expensive, one of the two. That's so crazy what he just said. Yeah. Because if it was me, I would, I would have had to say, I don't know what I would, because I get boils as it is if I do a commercial, right? So it's like, I don't know what I would have done. It was bad. I remember one time during the rehearsal period of that, I was like, because my character like worked for the CIA or something

important. And I was like, you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to like imagine I'm in a suit, like the whole rehearsal. So I just like imagined like I was in the suit. I walked around as if I was wearing a suit and the director at the very end of the, I'm feeling pretty good about myself at the end of this one day of rehearsal and the director comes up to me and he goes, you know what? Tomorrow, imagine you're wearing a suit. Shoot me now. Oh, really? I did that. I did a, you know, she's a great, I love her, but I was just the miscast. I did. Nobody could have known because I didn't read for it. Yeah, I did a part with Brooks Shields. And I told you about that. Right. Where the show owners didn't want me. They wanted Getty Won and Navi, Langtuk Dong. But

Fox said, no, we want Bobby. They didn't want me. They fought. But Fox won. But when I showed up, I would do the table read and I would do rehearsals and no one would laugh. And I had like a page and a half of dialogue was just one scene. Yeah. By the end of, by the show time, I had one line. Wow. They cut it down, right? And Brooks Shields didn't talk to me once. I would show up to rehearsal at scenes with her. She wouldn't say hi. I mean, the whole set hated me. Did you show your penis the first time? No, I don't do that in a corporate environment, James, right? But you knew who I loved during that process. She's from Blue Lagoon. She's okay with it. Yeah. With a nudity. David Swimmer. He directed it. Oh, really? And Swimmer every day would walk up. Is that

his name? Swimmer. Swimmer. Yeah. David Schwimmer. Swimmer. Swimmer would come up to me every day and go, I'm so sorry. They cut out two chunky things and you're not down to that. Like every day he would have to give me bad news. But he did it in a way that he was on my side. Yeah. He's a good dude. That's what a director needs to be is like somebody you can access and like cool with and like come up and have a conversation because it's really like that's what I realized doing all the jobs that I did on the show is that it's all fucking guesses. Like a script is a guess. Yeah. I hate that the program is called Final Draft. It's a fucking guess. You know what I mean? Rebrand that. Guessing what's going to work on its feet. And if you're so insistent that it's a final draft,

you're going to miss the better idea that comes out of the, you know, out of putting it on its feet. Can I say something? I really loved you on this today. I'll be real because I learned so much from you. It really did because I'm about to shoot Wednesday and I had all these fears. I think he's a youth lesson to my fear. He might not get boils tomorrow. I might not get boils tomorrow because of you. At the end, we do this thing called Unhelpful Advice. Yes. We read an email and you don't have to answer it. Well, you're going to answer it. We all put our two cents in. Yeah. So go ahead. Unhelpful Advice with Bobby Kalila and People Magazine's 50 Most Beautiful People in the World James Van der Lee. Yeah. You got to throw that out there. What year was that?

Do you know? He's every year. It happened twice. It happened in 1998. Oh, fancy. So there was like, it happened in like 1998. And then there was a lull for until about like 2000. I don't know. Something. Yeah. And that's when you go on fucking. And then I got more beautiful again. Yeah. That's why you get on your feet. Pussy frenzies. If I was on the people 50, right? I would be a frenzy monster. I believe you. Every day. But the sounds. Yeah. Anyway, go ahead. Give the end. Recently, I listened to episode 56 of Tiger Belly and you talked about character faults. My character fall in particular. I'm a person, a people pleaser and it drives me crazy. I can't handle rejection. When hanging out with friends,

I sacrifice what I want to do to make them happy. With sex, I do all I possibly can to make it great for the girl while neglecting my sexual needs. What would you do if you didn't know how to make yourself happy due to distress? And there's also some background on him. I'm 22 and I make very rash decisions. I tried to kill myself at 16 by arson by arson and spent 14 months in jail and four inpatient treatments. My choices to involve people in my life are ruining my chances of living. Chris. Oh my God. The backstory really brought it some insight. So he tried to kill himself by burning him on fire. Yeah, it's arson. That's a man right there. No, stop. Stop that. No, I don't condone killing anyone or killing anybody. But he said he tried to kill himself

through arson. Is that what he said? Yes, and he was that's a man to light yourself on fire. That's what people take fucking pills and they go, I'm going to go out that way. That's a pussy way to go. You're going to go by my point is that someone who's utterly hopeful. I'm so sorry. Don't do that again. Yeah, I'll say it again. Yeah, do it again. Do it again. Which one? Just read the last line. I'm going to rewind my thing. Background on me. I'm 22 and make very rash decisions. I tried to kill myself at 16, but no, the better. Yeah. So how should he wish he he's a people pleaser and he's unhappy. Oh God, therapy. I feel like Bobby should just redeem yourself. I'm giving you an opportunity. All right. Okay,

here we go, man. Yeah, you want the real? Yeah, I'll give you the real. Give us the real, please. When I was a kid, I went to three drug rehabs. Okay, I was drug addicted. You know, everyone knows my story, right? I try to kill myself myself. Okay, I killed myself myself, right? And I wasn't mad enough to do it by fire. But you know, I tried so I relate to you and that so when you're as a kid, you're right. That's like, you know, I'm sorry. But let me finish it. Hear me out. Just hear me out. Hear me out. Give me a chance. Okay, go ahead. Will you give me a chance? Yeah. All right. I'm going to start over. We can cut some of these things out. Right. So check it out. Yo, dude. So when I was your age back in the day,

I went to three rehabs. I try to kill myself myself. I said myself, why do I say myself? I don't know. Right. And but what happened was my life didn't start until like my late 20s, really. I went through a really dark, you know, life, you know, and I also didn't get a lot of policies. So when I first had Jennifer Field at the age of 23, like I don't know her going home security. When she was like, just eat my pussy. I never eaten pussy before. Just hear me out. Just hear me out. All right. Hear me out. Right. And I like dedicated myself into make pleasing her. And then afterwards I just wiped my face and I left. I think I didn't even get a blow job. So it's like I'm,

I was like one of those guys too. Like I just wanted to please. But then in my 30s, you know, I, you know, I killed it. But my point is, is this, is that your life will get, your life will get better. Is that better? Yeah. Is that good? What do you think? So your advice is just wait. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Wait. Wait. Because you grow up, you get old. He's 22. He's not. He's a baby. He's not lying, by the way. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Your life gets better. People don't know when you're in your fucking early 20s, you have no money, except from him. He was lead in a fucking WDB sitcom at 20. But my point is, is that some people, it was a teen melodrama. I know. Back to this. Yeah, I want, let's get James Vanderbeek's view on this. So he, so he,

so the idea is, well, clearly, like at the root of this is not the fact that you want to please people. It's that you don't love yourself. It's a self-esteem. That's what I meant to say. I'm just not eloquent with my words. So like, you know, I heard somebody once say like the goal, like love your neighbor as yourself. The first thing you have to be able to do is love yourself. Otherwise, you have no love to give. So if you want to turn it around. You should have your own podcast. Honestly, you should have your own fucking podcast. Where's the man's finish? I'll stop. Thank you, buddy. So yeah, if you, if you want to put it through the prism of like helping other people, then the first thing you

got to do is figure out how to love yourself, what to love about yourself. And I would, I would do one thing every day because you fucking deserve it. So not at the expense of anybody, obviously. And the other part is don't ever stop trying to please women in bed because it makes you better sex. That's not a bad thing. That's not a bad thing. Keep up the good work. But also make sure you take care of your needs too. But also definitely focus on us. I was a very depressed teenager and I think that it just, I think that it's just inevitable to go through those rough patches. I was an inpatient treatment. I tried to kill myself three fucking times. I was just a hot mess of a teenager. I couldn't deal with my father dying

before my very eyes. I couldn't deal with, you know, coming to the US from a new country. It was a lot of things being very poor, being very, there was a lot of things there. So it's, and even if, even if I had a normal life or even if things were going well in my life, I feel as though teenagers just go through that regardless. And it's just getting through knowing that that's a very pivotal part of growing up is the pain in, you know, teenage angst. And like you said, you really got to find things that you do like about yourself and hold on to those. And I think that in time, the people pleasing will sort of start to, you know, manifest. Yeah. Well, not manifest, but like reverse.

I just like, I like that word. I like that word. Just shut the fuck up with the manifestation. Yeah. For wrong usage, wrong usage, but it's almost there. Cut that out, manifest. There you go. There you go, Chris. That was very dark. That was dark. No, it was a great ending. It was a great ending. I don't care what you say. Okay. Okay. Because we did what we did. That was a good podcast.

I fucking loved it. That was fun. That was really good. And can I, can I, can I say to like, I'm so happy you did the show. You're so fucking great in it. I sat in the editing room and I watched, I would dig through like takes and just fine gems and you're a fucking treasure. Oh, thank you. And I love you. You know, I love you too. And I just say this, okay, thank you for hiring me.

And then also on top of that, if it gets picked up again, I want to do it. And then I'm just really blessed and thank you for having me involved in it. He's going to be in the new Alexander Payne movie. Check out Diplo on the thing. Follow him on all the Twitter handle. Oh yeah. What are your experience? At Vander James. At Vander James. And what? And if you're a fan of Disney Junior cartoons, I'm playing a vampire dad.

Oh, you're really? I'm a Disney Junior cartoon. After all that. After all that. Oh, wow. Just in case there's anybody out there who's going to tune in to Vampirina. I did it for my kids. It's so funny.

That's awesome. And is there a premiere that they can go to and stuff or not? I hope there is. I think October 1st it'll be on. Oh, it's going to be great. Yeah. I hope there is. And how old is your oldest?

Six. Oh my God. Yeah. Four is enough. Sometimes it feels like enough. Yeah. I don't know how he does it. But anyway, give James Vanderbeek a round of applause.

Yeah. Yeah. That was amazing. Hey, guys. And we're back. James Vanderbeek. He's a nice guy. He's very nice.

And he is handsome. Dude, that guy isn't aging. He looks the same. I remember that we were on, I went to go visit Bobby on set when they were filming Diplo. Yeah. And he came to Bobby's trailer and he introduced myself. He introduced himself to my sister and I.

And my sister and I were like, oh my God, like he's an attractive man. For somebody, I mean, he just hasn't aged at all. He works out in the park and plays football by himself. He's going to be wrapped. Yeah. You guys, I want to make an announcement for LA Podfest. Oh. LA Podfest is just a, it's an event.

It's sort of like a convention where a lot of different podcasts are going to be performing, I guess. Yeah. All your favorite podcasts. All your favorite podcasts are basically in one place. And Tiger Belly will be in the Gold Room at LA Podfest on October 7th. Where they're on Saturday, October 7th. Saturday, October 7th at 2 p.m.

At the Gold Room and we're going to be there from 2 p.m. to 4 p.m. It's important. So you can buy your tickets. What's the website? Um, LApodfest.com, just wait. We're, yeah, LApodfest.com. Kobe, quiet. So yes, you can buy tickets to LA Podfest and we're trying to fill up the room.

So, and we'll probably, you know, meet and greet with everybody and answer you guys's question. So that's in two weeks. Yeah, I want to say something about it. Okay, go ahead. And the whole LApodfest is three days, October 6th, 7th and 8th. Also this, though, guys, listen to me right now. It's not the same mic. Let me say this right now.

It's important that y'all come out to support us because we want to, you know, we want to show people that we're... The real deal. The real deal. If no one shows up, we're not the real deal. Imagine if we had to perform to an empty room. Yeah, we're not doing that. So everyone's invited.

We're going to do a meet and greet photos. Presence are needed. Presence? No, you don't have to need it. I mean, no, I mean, that's what I meant. You don't need to bring presents. Yeah. Is what I meant to say.

Are not needed. Are not needed. That's what I meant. I really didn't mean to say that. What did I say? Anyway, my... Their presence is needed. Their presence is needed is what I meant, George.

But you don't need to bring actual presents. Yeah, that's what I meant to say. And then also, where's the headphones? Oh, the aftershocks? Hey, whoever's the aftershock people. Thank you for giving us... I was... What was the dude's name?

Was it Nick? Yeah, thank you. Nick, who sent us all the aftershocks, had phones. You're amazing. Amazing, great product. And thank you for giving all of us a pair. Yeah. What are our other announcements?

Did we do a quick MMA minute? Bobby didn't watch the fight. I didn't watch it, so I'm not going to do it. Just quick boxing. I'll be here. Boxing minute and MMA minute. Nikolayo, we want to go see the Canelo and... Triple G.

Triple G fight. Claudia, your thoughts? Great fight first. Yeah, I thought it was a really entertaining fight, but it's exactly as I expected. And that is the W... I mean, boxing is the WWE. I knew that they were going to try for...

To get a second fight or a rematch out of this. So, and it's always that one lady judge, right? She scored 118 to 110 for Canelo. And even if you thought Canelo won, it wasn't by that... It wasn't by that spread at all. It was very wide. Yeah, so I... unfortunately, it confirms to me always

that boxing is still as fixed as ever, even though there's nothing fixed about the actual fighting, because those guys were really going at it. And Triple G looked amazing. Look, I was not expecting that. Really? Oh, I had Canelo... Well, remember, based on the last fight,

and then I had Canelo... I think we both had Canelo. I wanted Canelo to win, although I do like Triple G a lot. I like him too, but I just thought Canelo, the younger guy, was going to get it. Yeah. Um, but yeah, we're going to probably get a rematch of that, so that's cool.

Yeah. And then your boy, you and Jessica's boy, Luke Rockhold... No, that's his boy. Oh, that's Bobby's boy. That's Bobby's boy. Rock, uh, Rocklude? Rocklude, hold. Yeah.

Luke Rockhold, uh, he won against David Branch. And, uh, our takeaway from that, I think even the whole room were like, that was a weird, not a Luke Rockhold fight. Yeah, it wasn't the usual Luke Rockhold performance. Not the Android, you know? Yeah, I don't know what it is, but I love Luke Rockhold. I think he's probably one of the most talented guys out there.

He didn't look like himself. He, he, he looked to me, even though it was a win, that first round, he came in sloppy. Just alone the kicks? You know how he has a... No, because usually Luke Rockhold is very economical with his movement. Like he'll throw a kick and he,

but he'll only throw it if he knows it's going to land somewhere and if it's going to be like, he's not one of those guys that throws, um, um, in numbers. Uh, check, checks, like, or like the, just like taps, like jab, jab kicks, basically, just checking. Yeah, like he's very, yeah, he's economical about it. But, um, but this time around,

he was throwing just some really unnecessary, like sloppy kicks. I also don't know anything about actual fighting. So I don't know. I mean, a guy won. But you're right. Like even a lot of those martial artists that were there with us, it was like,

you know, Luke Rockhold usually kicks full power and he changes it back so fast. He would like throw it. It would stay out there. He wouldn't chamber the leg back. And he got caught a couple of times. And then he got tagged so easily. By a sloppy standup guy.

Yeah, he, didn't he not just look well to you? Yeah. There was something different about. He's coming off a loss. He hasn't fought in a while. So I would assume rust. But there isn't such a thing. Come on, Dominic Cruz, guys.

There's no such thing as ring rust. It's Dominic Cruz. He's also an android. Come on. But yeah, any other thoughts on that fight? Um, no. I mean, I hope that, you know, in his next fight that he really comes out is the old Luke Rockhold.

I mean, even when he was sick from a staff infection and unantibiotics, he still beat the shit out of a wide wide Jesus. Do you know what I mean? That's Luke Rockhold. That guy against David Branch isn't how I remember him or how I see him. He fantasizes about him.

Yes. I don't know. Um, anything else, George? No, that's it for me. Follow us on Instagram at Tiger Valley and on Twitter at theTigerBelly. And email us any questions at theTigerBellyGmail.com. We will update you on social media

about what just transpired just now. Bye and watch the Diplo. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to TigerBelly ad-free on Amazon Music, download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen ad-free with Wondry Plus in Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at wondry.com.