TigerBelly - Episode 166: Steebeeweebee & Monotone Bob
Episode Date: October 31, 2018Bobo regresses. Steebee progresses. Koloko gets hacked. We talk haunted mazes, a traffic incident, Red Dead Redemption, and Doctor Choi.Bonus content every Monday:https://www.patreon.com/Tige...rBellySupport us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Sit down and talk about
But there's that's politics it's not because he's not good hitting golden he's a little bit older now
He's got that wrestling technique. You don't know what you're talking about. I don't know. He's a wrestling legend
He's a wrestling legend. I'm gonna say this right now. I'm gonna say this right now
I'm the host of the show
I'm the host of your show and I'm your brother and I'm older and I respect that talk over me right now
I have to start I have to start all I start from the beginning. Okay, but you have to check your attitude before
Kirby should be fine with the cats. Oh, yeah, okay
Oh
Calm down. Okay, do the countdown
Five four. That's it. Stop there
Welcome to another episode of
Tiger belly
Tiger belly is a podcast that I started with my beautiful princess
Kalilah and it is her birthday this week. So give her a round of applause for that
She's gonna be 27 years old
November 1st young 21 and she looks 22
Yeah, she does look at my neck skin. I know the 18
18
Her vagina 12
Yeah, it's great, babe
What do you know what it's 12 year-old
I'm so kidding with George. George. You gotta edit that out. I
Know you do what I don't have to edit that out. It's just a joke. I don't have to edit it out. No, I'm not
Don't talk when I'm talking I haven't introduced you yet. You're you're my older brother
I respect you. I know I just say you're this is my thing. So just we're not editing that out. Okay
Beautiful girlfriend tiger belly. It's a podcast. We learn things from here. There's sciences, you know
We learn about social and endeavors
The things that are going on in the world
But mainly we talk about nonsense
I am your host
The reason I'm doing the podcast like this without any singing and all that stuff is because
On-line people have say I've been saying that I'm annoying my laugh is a little too cackly
People can handle me and only in small doses. I've been reading that on Twitter. So I'm starting my podcast this way
I'm not gonna do any of the things that are annoying. You're gonna be monotone Bob
Monotone Bob right now. I'm not gonna laugh cackle. I'm gonna be confrontational
I might stand a couple of times, but I'm gonna be more of a mediator here. All right
We've got Gilbert Galone. We got George. I'm a very good friend. My white friend, white nothing
George Kim
Monotone Bob still thinks you're white. Yeah. Yeah. Monotone Bob. That doesn't change. You're white nothing. You are
George you're just one of those guys like you know how you you go to the museum or you look at some history book and stuff and you see like
These are coal miners from 1890, right? And there's like 30 40 guys just sitting on top of a hill
Yeah, he's just one of those guys like dead in the eyes. No, it's just like who it's like
That's a matter. He was just there. Yeah, but they matter
Individually they do but as a cold they don't and they you know
We got his the price, you know the poet I call him a poet. I call him a journeyman
He is my
Magellan because he's an explorer of Filipino killed Magellan la pu la pu killed Magellan and that's right there hierarchy
And that's right there. So just know who your boss is. Okay, you know who your boss Gilbert and I
We will kill you
We have
You know a guest here that I
Didn't know we're gonna have today
We were gonna have somebody else, but that's somebody fell out
due to a busy schedule and
We have somebody that I've known for
44 years
44 years 44 years. I've known that 32 years. No, that's 34 is it 32 or 44. Yeah, you're not 32
Look at my skin
Yeah, all right, he's 32 sure
Then I'm 35 am I 35 look at my skin 38
I'll give you 32 that full of mustache. All right fine. So I'll 38 so we've got my brother
You really are a reverse aging when you pop when you poked your head through the door to talk to me
Yeah, I was like holy shit. Yeah, you are you look younger? Yeah the last time I saw you your life
She says the right things
Yeah, you are um
You're Benjamin Bob Bolton. I love it. You do right? I love life
Shut up. I fuck up about life. I want to first up making amends. I haven't introduced you. You fuck before you do that
I want to make apology. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm Kalilah. I'm sorry for bringing Kirby
It was not mindful for me to check with you first. It's fine. I won't do it again. It's fine
You know what that is right? We know what I call that ten years of sobriety
Mm-hmm. Give him a round of applause. I thought we just celebrated ten years of sobriety
Yeah, well wait old Steve. How would he have done? Old Steve was a fuck her
Kirby stays and all that stuff. No
No, no, no, I realized I had a part in it. I should have that was really your attitude that bugged me. It was his
He you know what kind of I love this guy so much his life's good. I love him so much
His life's good. Good life man. Yeah, financially stable. Yeah
He needs like therapy or he needs to start going to more meetings. No, let me say something
I'm monotone Bob right now. Yeah, right, but you don't want me. I'm like the hawk there. What do you mean? What do you mean?
Wait, no, I'm not I'm just saying I'm doing I don't know I know but monotone Bob, right?
If you're enraged him enough he turns into regular Bob. Oh, all right. So right now monotone Bob
I'm there's veins sticking out of monotone's Bob's face. Yeah, he's turning a little green
But not fully green and I haven't grown. So let me say something. What the fuck do you mean by that?
No, I think it would help you though. Yeah, what's wrong with I have no anger
You want to talk about anger
Dr. Who?
Korean yeah, that's amazing. Yeah, I feel like that's perfect. He probably understands the Korean family dynamics and the rage
Yes, he and he used to yeah, and he uh, yeah, he's he understands the Asian. Yeah, can I say this though right now? Yeah, and I'm not
Just between you and me, right? I'm not gonna say nothing. I swear to God. I'm not and I'm not I'm just saying that
You could talk about dr. Troy all you want. I could say a couple of things right now to get you back
I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna do that. I'm gonna tell you right now dude right now
Look at me right now, right? I have a couple of words. I could say I know I know you back
Into a rage mode
I'm just telling you that I have the tools. I know you oh well
Yeah, let's I know you just as well. I already know. Hey guys quick fucking rewind the last time we all did a podcast
You put him in the red zone, and I don't want that
I know we're not doing that right now. I'm just letting you know. Yeah, that's there. I know how your brain works
I know what you're like, you're like Bain. Whoa, you call me what Bain Bain?
You know what you're like what penguin?
Yeah
Yeah, oh, yeah, you're the penguin did I always thought he was the creepiest of all villains. Yeah till to this day
Anyone really good to see you
Really, thanks for doing it Steven Lee is my guest here on Pataga Bella. Really good to see you. Okay. Yeah, I'm fine
I'm fine. This is fine. I'm fine, too. I do I know who doesn't need therapy
You don't need it. Yeah
David so
Look at me right now dude look at me right now. Who's the healthiest guy you've ever met in your life not you but
You don't know I don't need it. I don't need it. I don't need it though, right?
But you do need to go to more me. No, no, no, who doesn't need who doesn't need to go to more meeting
At least once or twice. Okay, that's good. That's fine. That's fair
Once or twice congrats on ten years
Okay, all right, so
Who's Ben Askren Ben Askren is I don't fuck do you not know you don't know
He's a grappling wizard. Oh, yeah, there's a wizard. He's one's a couple NCA a division one wrestling titles
Was it Wyoming? Is it did he go to why can you look that up Gilbert? Yeah, you know, Montana
We don't really walkie something like Midwest. So, I mean, I remember they used to call him the fro
Yeah, and the stands he they'd have like the fro. Okay, get a fro and he was a so what you're saying to me is this
Ben the UFC has acquired Ben Askren
There's a never gave him a chance Dana always hated on him. Why where's he from though? Because Ben's style is kind of like
Hubs Habib style. Yeah, but it Dana Dana still hasn't blocked on on
Social media. That's what I heard
Something about him. I think bothers Dana. Why so what is what they're saying?
They're saying it's his fighting style his grappling style because he doesn't take a lot of damage
He could take you down in any position. No, but why would you block somebody? Yeah?
So Ben Askren is gonna come to the UFC and you're so I'm very happy about it
I believe in you brother
Right, yeah, I think he could I think he could take Habib or give him a I think he could take him down
I think that it would be really fun
Once but can I just say this so that couldn't cut it in the UFC they go to Bellator
Like who you're talking about like Rory who could have very well been no Rory was great top five forever
I know but Rory could not be champion
Okay, so I also another another guy that there's another guy that I just saw that's in Bellator
Which is that one dude that fought Anderson Silva. He's a white guy. He's a Republican. I know he's
Chailson
He's pretty chill sounds like 45 years. That's my point. Why my point is is that when they're old and they're trying to do it
Yeah, they go to Bellator. He has a show at Ariel. All right. All right. This guy Ben Askren. All right
I'm gonna believe what you say, but when when when he fights the first one, he's gonna fight somebody in the top five
He might fight
Ferguson I
Think he could do fairly well. You think that he can beat Ferguson
So that's kind of a hard question cuz he's been out of the well then that we all Steve is saying is that you can't
Account him and he for sure has skills
I can't wait for the moment when he play I'm gonna go I'm gonna have a party when he fights an Askren party
We're having an Askren party. I'm gonna sit next to my brother Steve and in between my girlfriend and my brother
I'm gonna put my arms around them and we're gonna watch him fight and let me say something if he fees as good as you say is
I'm gonna get on my hands and knees, right? And I'll stay there for an hour. You heard it first at Tiger Bell
I'm with you Steve by the way
I will I'll be in my hands and knees for an hour and I will beg for your forgiveness
I just remember that night Conor vs. Habib. He drove me home and he was saying he didn't like the outcome and I'm like
What's wrong? What's going on? He's like cuz he was saying it's not fair because it's like
Someone having a superpower, but then I thought about it. It's like Conor had the same thing his superpowers is left, right?
But he was saying that it's really not fair because no one it's like this
Unstoppable, you know super that no one could stop, but that's a part of the game, dude
You know, that's like his okay. Congratulations to the ten years
I'm so happy for you. Okay. Okay. I think that as you're progressing to be as you're progressing to be a better human being
I find that your brother is regressing
They tell you about what happened over the weekend. No, I would like to know no what what is you're gonna say?
What happened this does anyone know what happened over the weekend?
Oh, does it okay? What are you gonna say before we even get a guy might stop you the biggest thing?
All right. Well, I'm stopping you what that does has no business in in this podcast anymore
I feel like it's my right to tell this story. It's my story to tell guess why what you guys
I didn't fucking put your poop in a doggy bag. Didn't I whoa?
It's my story now as if I have to do the cleanup. It's my story to tell I
Have to know the story
Tell us Bobby
Your story you tell
So I get a phone call. I get a phone call. He's coming home from from Warner Brothers
And he had a frantic phone call. He's like baby
That's not that's not something so bad. Just happy. Oh, yeah, he went to Terry
Which is great food on Melrose. No, there's a new one on
And I get a phone call. He's like, babe
Something really bad just happened in my head the first thing is like, oh my god. He's finally run over somebody and
And like that's what I because it was driving. Yeah, cuz he's a while
Dude his driving is insane. Yeah, so then I was like shit. What happened
He's like, I need help. I'm downstairs in the garage and there's poo everywhere
And I'm like, how is there poo everywhere
It turns out that he was on the freeway on route to come home
Stuck in traffic couldn't make it out of the exit pulled over into the side of the freeway
Climbed over into the backseat and took shit in the backseat
My dad was driving, he's driving this van because he'd put his merchandise in it
And then he was on some kind of freeway or highway
And he couldn't stop either, but he did it on a paper plate at least
He did it right on the scene
Disgusting man, and then he comes he comes running up there
You're a goddamn animal man
You need help, bro. And can I tell you what happened? He's a afterwards. He's a beast
So he tells
He comes up and I see his butt as he's what runs into the bathroom and it's just diarrhea all over his pants
So then I'm thinking he couldn't even take his fucking pants off. It's his health
You know what I mean?
No, we need to talk about his pants and then into the car seat and then I said fine. Listen to this Steve
And then and then I said, okay fine. I'll take it to the car wash in the morning
But I was like, you know what I'm not gonna do it. I'm gonna have Jenna do it
Because you know Jenna needs the money and I saw it's older
You better give her five hundred dollars. She came in and a hazmat suit. She came. I swear to God. She came in fully suited up
And but then he goes it was $50
Fifty it was 50
And then he said he said I tried to I tried to clean it with a spray as best as I could
So Jenna should be fine dry. So Jenna basically had
But then that's not the worst part on the way there
On the way there Jenna checked the back seat because she was like something smells really bad
Are you sure that he clean it with spray and she goes back there and there's two big turds
That kind of just roll have been rolling around in the back seat camouflage into the yeah, so she then has to
She then had she calls me. She's like, oh my god
I don't know what to do, but there's still pool rolling around back there and
So I she had to pick it up. She had to use her hands. She had to raw hand it
I'm worried about his health
There's so he's gonna get a colonoscopy. There's so much meat
Korean barbecue and just meat
I know his body. I am his brother
I believe you know now that you said I'm his little brother. Yeah, he's got so much just stored meat
Bulgogi and steak and cuz he eats so good
We need to get him like flushed out. Okay, let me tell you my point of view. Okay, okay
So when you told me to clean the car I went down there, all right
I cleaned the driver's seat because when I climbed back in those shit all over drivers
Yeah, and when I look back there, right?
it looked like
Just the back in the day during Vietnam just like, you know
You know just a war zone. Mm-hmm. There's shit all over the place and I just thought to myself
And she did it thank you Jenna, but then here's I went to the store though
That night
Right and the shit was still back there the poop. Yeah, and the you know
We have a lot guy at the comedy store. Mm-hmm, and he walks in the car and he goes
Dude, it smells like shit in here. I got there is
right
And he just left my car there the whole night in one spot
He had to maneuver all the cars around my car. He wouldn't drive it. They wouldn't drive it. Yeah. Yeah
So if you don't want people to drive your car, that's a good way to do it
You know, I mean and then also on top of it. Um, I'll tell you I'll tell you my point of view on the incident
Okay, yeah, so when I think you could have went out this is listen listen to what I what now can you listen to my point of view?
All right
So when I was at Terries, which is delicious by the way, I want to order. I ordered just a chicken tinga
No, you have super nachos. No, I don't have super nachos in a quesadilla. I ate it and I I was I left the
Restaurant and then in my head. I'm like, oh fuck. I I she I order her a salad
Hmm, right. So I ran back in I had already bought it. I could you have the salad that I said to go
They go yeah, and as soon as he grabbed I'm like this food
I'd get to get this to Kalila
Because my little baby honey is starving. Oh, he's gonna put it on me. No, I'm not gonna put it on you
Right baby, honey, but then when I was walking out of the building. I this is what I heard
All right, that wasn't even a fart. That was my stomach. Oh damn
That was your stomach. Yeah. Yeah, that wasn't even a fart. I farted inside my body
Yeah, have you ever done that? It's just yeah, I've sucked one. I've sucked one. Yeah in my body
And it a little sweat and I was like, what do I do now? This is as an adult you have these questions
Should I get in the car and just fucking drive home?
Right. Or should I just go to the bathroom here? What about going to Terry at Terry? Yeah, it was in Terry still
Why don't you just go use your bathroom because she had it in her salad. I would why but it was also
I also just say gotta just say this it wasn't fully like oh, I can shit right now
I just feel like brewing up. Yeah, right for the record, baby, honey could have waited
I know I know for a salad. I know okay, so when you pulled over no, no, she got it wrong
Okay
So I'm not even on the freeway
Okay, I'm like kind of like where you know where Highland is but this is like five o'clock. That's packed. It's packed
Right, and it won't move and all of us and whoop. I fell the fart. That's a fart
Nothing came out just fart. No, but it was like, you know how the that was like that my opening act
Like my opening act was strong
Yeah, and right then I thought the middle act was gonna go up
No, but the headliner was there
You'd have time to prepare. Yeah. Yeah, there's no middle act. No shark. No, it was boop, and then the head stuck out
Right like that. I don't hold like that right out solid and I go where's the middle act
Yeah, I mean a couple more farts. There's no middle act, right? So he needs to go up now the headliner
He needs to be diarrhea or was it makes me even angrier the fact that it wasn't diarrhea
It means that it wasn't that urgent. It was urgent. Are you out of your mind? It was so urgent
And let me just say this right now. Did you see the back of my it was of did I show this show?
It's why it was a variety show. Oh, well not just and right. It wasn't just stand up
It was there was water, you mean there was like, you know, I mean some other thing that magic the combo
Magic show, right? So I pull over to a residential area and there's construction happening on my right side and there's you know
How those gigantic construction?
Trash containers the gigantic ones I pull right behind there and I jump in the back seat
I pull my pants down and I you know all over
Okay, and the the beginning of it was the solid part, but the end I'm telling you right now as
Jesus as my witness. It was a liquid show
Like oh like Cirque du Soleil. Yeah, it was Cirque du Soleil
Okay
And I felt like killing myself
God the smell must have been horrific. It was horrific
But he still brought up my salad with a truck full of shit in his butt
He came home and there's poo everywhere, but he had a salad at one hand clean dedicated. Yeah, dedicated
He haven't done that ever huh? I've done it all the time. I've just seen me poo on houses
Yeah on house walls like he will actually just bend over shoot it like point his butt at a wall and spray
She stopped me do that and on someone's like gardenia. Yeah
We need a doctor. We gotta fix it. Maybe maybe not. I mean his health man, you know, no, I'm serious
Yeah, like you're being real serious. I'm being serious. So you let me ask you something. What do you think it's going on with me?
your diet
It's all meat. You think I eat all meat. No veggies. No. Hmm. That's interesting. It's potato vegetable
Yes, it is I eat that too. I'm just saying you because you have so much money you make a good living
Okay, you could eat Korean everyone listening. I do okay. Thank you. You you could I'm no crystal
Yeah, I'll take that I know you could afford eating out. He could afford eating out all the time, right?
Uh-huh. I don't he doesn't go to like suplantation
does he
How is sluplantation like the healthy spot?
Veggies
You know, I mean veggies. What did I eat yesterday meat? I did eat me
Smoky yesterday. Yeah, so yesterday woke up and your little Filipino nieces will sing with us Juliana
great, yeah, she's great and
So I took her to Warner Brothers and I go, let's go to the smoke house is right next to it
Mm-hmm, and I had a prime rib so good. Yeah, right? You did. Yeah, but I had fried zucchini. Yeah, right fried
He likes fried stuff. Yeah, but zucchini deep fried like that. It's not healthy, sweetie
It they totally just eliminates the outer part is unhealthy, but the inner part is healthy
No, it's not you've already taken away all like deep frying it takes away all of the good stuff
Oh
Anyway, then what else did I have then we had the artichoke the grilled artichoke that was good
This is all at the same place. Yeah, the same place
So I had a primary and then a ton of garlic bread the last night. I had
Basanova, I had a fried chicken patty fried fried fried snow was a chicken like, you know fried
Yeah, she can fry deep-fried deep-fried with batter fries. That's my concern is these you guys are doing well
He's doing well. That's the only thing that could take him down is his health
That's why I don't go out to eat with you guys anymore
So we're not gonna eat after this because I just can't we got a we got a guess. I got a did they text back
Yeah, I have a episode. I have to text, but I can't afford you to eat it as indulgently as him
So I don't go out to eat with him
I just make my own food at home because that shit's not healthy. Could he do the intermittent intermittent fasting
Do you know what he actually does it?
I was doing it every Sunday. I would not eat for 24 hours kill
That's his that's not his problem because he actually won't eat for 16 hours, but in those eight hours
He eats real pure garbage like what I won't eat 12 hours and I'll eat a fat burger with fried egg and chili
Yeah, then my body goes crazy and then straight into like a strawberry shortcake and then I go right to sleep
So that stuff is in my body when I'm sleeping. Yeah, he actually has a big meal before sleep. Yeah
Mm-hmm. It's not good guys. Yeah, it's not good and um, you know, it's very concerning
Is he sleeping okay? No today. He slept at like 10 o'clock in the morning in the morning
Yeah, and I have a 10 o'clock on a call time tomorrow morning, too. Oh gosh. I mean, yeah, he's self-sabotaging
I
I mean, do you what time do you go to sleep?
Um, like one two to three. That's better. What are you doing? Oh, you're playing Red Dead Redemption, which I want to talk about
Okay, that's what right segue. What a great you're a professional
All right, gilly. You've been playing Red Dead. I have let's one word. What it's a grind
It's not only a grind
Here's the thing about video games is that when you play a video game you still want it to feel like a video game
But they made it so real the way he moves the way he walks
If he grabs and bow and arrow from his saddle, it just takes 40 seconds, you know, it's realistic
It's realistic
Then you got a you're with a group of people you have kids in your in your camp. What's the story about?
It's basically you're following a gang. You're in a gang, but I'm gonna talk about this gang in a second. Okay, so you have to
You have to you know, you have to contribute to the gang to either bring over dear meat
And are you already you're hunting? Yeah. Yeah, Gil you honey. Yeah, I know your favorite
Here's the number one thing is is that this isn't the late 18 1800s and
I want it to be historically accurate. Everything else is accurate except for the gang
The gang's not there's three black guys in the gang and a full-blown Mexican and the half American Indian half black guy
Yeah, okay, the Mexican guy, right? Like he's just it's it's like you can't you're not it would be back in the day
You weren't able to walk into a bar with just four black guys, you know, I mean in the 1800s
Well, you want the the whole thing to be just like pure way
No, you can have them in there, but put put them in the back of the line or you know, I mean something more historically accurate
Yeah, but like you might that's not
psychologically healthy either too like
Especially if you're the person playing
Go back and live at a time where people are inferior to you. Oh, that's right. That's not good for children
That's true. And then and there you go. That's all I needed an explanation
Where are like the Chinese people during that time period? Well, we were there. We were building the railroads railroads
And we had also opium dens a single we've never seen a single Chinese so far
No
Another thing about the put at least some Asians in there too, right?
But the game though when you walk into a town, it's living and breathing. I mean, I walk how good their graphics
I mean, it's not even just good. It's like I walked to a
It was a store, you know, like a general store and there was like five guys
Just one guy leaning against the wall some guys sitting on a thing, you know, and it just it looked so real
The way he opens a door. It's not like he just opens it like he would open a door
Yeah, like it's everything is so real. How are the weapons and the mods and Steve?
What I fucking get to it, man. Yeah, sorry, sorry, sorry
Jesus
Another good thing about the game is is that the weather system? Oh, yeah
The wind the way the trees sway you could just feel it, you know
It's it's just gorgeous and it's one of those things where if you're a gamer, you just have to play it
Mm-hmm. It's just they spent what take five years on it. I'll be more than that. Honestly. Yeah
I mean it you can it's on the screen
Everything about it the detail. I mean that
You I don't know how anything works
Did the little symbols on the bottom really teach you they don't teach you enough yet to figure it out real life like real life
I mean, there's one guy. There wasn't one poor guy and murdered on by a river with a bone error with bone area
Oh, it's an open world like that. Yeah, and I accidentally did it. He was like hey, buddy
Come here. I want to show you something and you should kill them and I had my bow and arrow and and if you plus left trigger
If you don't have a thing you can start a dialogue
But I had a weapon so I pressed left trigger and I go hey like this, right?
And he goes anybody and he shot me right and then I put my bow and arrow right through his neck
Oh, he dies and all of a sudden little symbol says that you know, I mean that because I guess karma. Oh, yeah
Yeah, that's in there. Yeah, that's in there. Yeah, it's like it's like Westworld. You're the bad guy or the good
Yeah, yeah, it really are animals you can hunt. Oh my god
It's it's not only that the way they die the animals. It's really so so it takes forever
They you know, I mean they stumble for a while, right?
They fall and they're still breathing put them out of their misery
You can put them on their misery. Yeah, and then skinning them takes about 10 minutes. It's you yet to open up
The car. Yeah, it's pretty good. It's almost two realist, but it is a masterpiece. You haven't done. You'll never play it, right?
Well, the reason being is I played the crap out of the first one
I and then I was telling you I was playing the games within the games like poker and then there's arts
Yeah, yeah, and I I just know I know I know me. I know the darts. Yeah, I did all that
I did all of it, but I know me as I will just lose myself in that all right
So but you so what your point of view though is is that?
You don't want to play Red Dead Redemption because you don't want to play video games for that long
But last night. What time did you play till?
Me and Griffin played till like
34 in the morning. Yeah. What are you guys starting? We did we did like this one. Yeah, well, I could ween off destiny
That's the reason you can't you can't come to your house. You're playing. Oh, no, I could quit
No, no, I could quit it. The reason why you won't play Red Dead Redemption
It's not because of the fact that you don't want to be playing video games is because you don't want you want to you
Don't want to stop playing destiny
Damn it, my Twitter won't stop going off because of your bullshit
What happened? She was taking a shower and
He does this all the time. He always goes through my phone and then all of a sudden I go back to my phone
I'm like, why do I have a hundred fifty notifications famous and then here's what I go on my Twitter
Apparently I tweeted my boyfriend's cum tastes like pumpkin spice in life yum yum bye
My boyfriend Bobby Lee has a penis. I call magic Jesus flesh thick. It's so very yum yum bye
And then the third one is yum yum
Just yum yum
And then the other was my vagina is huge and stinky
My boyfriend Bobby Lee has the biggest penis my boyfriend Bobby Lee
like life
Yum yum no yummy
Have you you know how many followers I just lost
Lock your phone lady like four hundred put a passcode in there
You know, man. Have you ever done that to Bobby's phone? Never? I would never do that
But how long you guys been together now five? Yeah
Beautiful beautiful years. I mean no apparently it just we never get past the hacking
When's the next what's the next step?
none
Why there is why does there have to be a next step?
Getting a house. That's a big step right next up
And also next step would be the fans of tiger belly to watch the splitting up together on ABC at 930 because it's about to get canceled
So everybody who's watching coming up together on ABC Monday night Tuesday night Tuesday
That's because you keep at 9 p.m. 9 30 9 30 p.m
Yeah, I mean, you know what the thing is is that I you know, I love the show. I really do we went to the set yesterday
I love the people of Jen. I love all I love everyone on it. I
Like working but there's just some some things in life. I think it's a good show. I just yeah
You know in some things in life, you can't control and that's one of the things I just can't control and it's driving me crazy
There's nothing I can do and Kalilah assures me that why are you smiling and what are you doing? No, no, no
I just I started
Why do you zone out just now? I don't know. I just zoned out. Have you eaten today? No, yeah, but you do you've been doing that
I mean you've been doing that
You've been doing it for 34 years. No, no, no, all right 32 years. Oh, we love Ridge wallet
You ever Ridge wallet? No. Oh, we need to get Steve one
I think we have one. Yeah, we do have one for you. That's right here. Oh, don't give the Titanium's mine
Thank you. Wow. So the camera that so check it out
If you guys are looking for top
Of the line if you're looking for a top of the line wallet go to the Ridge. Yeah Ridge wallet. It's
But would you you're not gonna use it, right? State of the art
Metallic and I tell you why it's good Steve. Huh? Come here. Okay
See this right here this titanium, right? Yeah, you know people through your leather wallet can read your
information on it, right?
Right, they can scan it read it, right? Yeah, this has the blockage thing
anti-theft
Yeah, is this a money clip one too?
Might be there's a money clip in the back where you push your cash
It really is a slick beautiful wallet, and it's yours to have and it's yours to have
But I work he has a leather one that he uses. Are you gonna use this? Yeah? No, look
That's not just zone that he just zoned out and he's lying. No, I will that's what he does when he lies
No, I don't know look at me. I very good. Thank you Steve. It's very good Steve. You know, thank you
Are you guys doing Halloween this year you and I don't know
I think we're gonna go spend Halloween with our nieces go trick-or-treating. Are you guys we saw superior last night?
I know you're against it. That's right. Let me tell you something. It was
There's a scene in that movie. I don't want to give out the spoilers the spoilers, but you'll never be the same
It's a it's a dance recital. It's a dancing and you will have never seen a scene like that on on the
The screen it's so cryptic and scary
You'll cringe. Yeah. Yeah, but go check dude. Is that what one through ten? What do you give it eight point eight point five in a point?
Yeah, it's scary. Yeah, I mean, it's not only that it's like hereditary
Yeah, you have to there's different um acts so you have to really pay attention. I thought it was about witches
There's like I was just about but it goes deep it goes deep. Yeah, is it better than hereditary?
It's hard to compare the two, but it's probably the way it shot is beautiful. It like it takes place in Germany and
You know Cold War era and it's just shot so beautifully
Acting is amazing. You know how you were like it looks like a cross between black swan and rosemary's baby
Did you exactly that? Yeah, and it's exactly that Tom York does the um dude the music
Yeah, Tom York is amazing. The music is amazing in it. Please watch it. It's that good
Yeah, there's a scene in there. You will not be I'm telling you you will not be the same
You'll watch it and you'll look at Bob like what the hell is going on?
This is crazy. Oh, but what do you give haunting on Hill House Netflix?
Oh, he's done. He's done for I mean I forgot I forgot I forgot you're on four. That's where is that?
Yeah, you're on four. Yeah, I forgot. I thought you finished it. What do you give it so far love the ring?
I like Luke's yeah, yeah, yeah that that character that that's until five
No Luke story is for it is yeah the hat man. Yeah, the hat man
Yeah, that's the last one. I saw number five is bent necklady. Yeah, I haven't seen that. That's Nelly's
Who's the bent necklady? Yeah, yeah, why are you laughing wait turn red episode eight my team too, you know
Be on my side. Yeah. Yeah
But you know I love the series man
It's that scene you know what you have to admit though this though the scariest scene is it when the two sisters are in the car
No, hold on. He's not there yet. I'm not there yet
Okay, try to catch him baby. I don't know but what do you give it so far the right?
Out of ten. Yeah
8.6 so everything's an 8.5 to you well a spirit spirulina was an 8.5
Spirulina was 8.5. Yeah, hell house is 8.5 as well
Hill house Hill house. Yeah 8.6 8.6. So you give it a point above you have to because it's 10 hours long
I love it. It's great. So far. I love the story
I like the the dynamic with the family members like the history of the house. Yeah, it's really kind of just sad
It's heartbreaking. Yeah, how would happen to all of the siblings? It's just a sad story
I like how each episode was thus far is focusing on a four was it the four
It will I think I think you I think you'd be very I think you'd be surprised. Yeah. Yeah
It's gonna be great. Yeah, so you have something to look forward to the watch. Yeah, I might do that with I'm on a Halloween
Halloween watch all of them. Yeah. Yeah, I can't get her to um
You can finish that we were on episode 10 and we've been trying to watch the last one for a while
Cuz I'm rewatching how many episodes are there ten? Oh, there's ten. So we've we're done. You didn't know that no
I'm just going one episode at a time. Yeah one through you go one through ten
Correct for yeah four was good for it was very good. The last one you get the very last one. Yeah, are you watching it Gilbert?
Yeah, okay. Why cuz red dead? Okay. Yeah red dead is consuming you not limiting myself
Yeah, I'm gonna play a red dead as well tonight. Um, are we supposed to we're supposed to go to Halloween horror night?
Oh, I went to not scary form. Can I give you my review? Yeah
Not scary form for to celebrate my 10th year of sobriety
It was amazing, but one thing
The actors there's actors that scare you within they they're a little bit too much
What do you mean like extra? Oh my they get this close. Yeah, I mean, there's a clown area where there's just okay
So there's actors within the mazes. There's ten different mazes or nine different mazes and they all have their own themes
The first one was the depths or whatever. There's different themes
There's actors in there
But then there's also actors that walk around the amusement park to scare you and there's different themes within the park
But there's one section where there's all clowns like there's a clown. That was wearing like stilts
And there's and then but the clowns had metal some kind of metal
thing blade thing where they would skid like I saw like there's a group of Hispanic girls like high school kids and
this guy this clown was hiding and he literally out of the bushes came across and
Skid with that metal shoe and it made sparks, but it almost like cut her damn foot
Okay, and she was like she was so startled. She was crying
She was like, you know, I'm like dude, but something happened with me in my the second maze
What happened?
What was the theme take your time take your time take your time what build the world build the world what theme?
Yeah, where are we? I don't know what the second it was called. It was it was an alien thing
It was the first one it was called the depths and it was the underwater ocean theme where there's ocean creatures
But the second one was it was called dark entities. It was an alien monster theme
So it was you know, they're scaring you within the the maze but towards the end of the maze this one
guy
He went he got too close to me. Yeah, you know and I palm struck them. Oh my god
So I did a Bruce Lee like palms. Yeah, I'm out of fear out of fear out of aggression
But I hit him like right here
You know like that. Yeah, and then he goes what the fuck man. He broke character. He broke character
Yeah, he broke character. He goes you hit me man
He goes, you know, there's cameras in here motherfuckers, you know, and it like
wait, he's
You know, it's an actor. Why'd you hit him? I don't know. I mean, I was just protecting
I think he was probably just instinct. Yeah
And then what happened then that that's it. It was Ilani with you. Yeah, what did she say?
So I was there with Ilani omni boy rain our neighbor and our neighbor Diego
You know what that would have been nice to get an invite
Wouldn't have been nice
Well, what if
I like to do wouldn't have been nice Halloween Horror Nights is the same. Uh, do you know what?
We'll go to amusement park, but we had a car filled with you know, our neighbors were going and we picked up
Yeah, but it was just at the I wouldn't have probably gone. Yeah
To be honest, I probably wouldn't have gone
But you know what would be a nice gesture. Yeah. Hey, you want to come? Okay, we'll do it. No, no
No, I don't want to go to raging waters. We'll go raging water. I don't want to go to no raging waters, dude
I want to get wet with you, bro. I haven't been to raging water since high school
I'd love to go the Universal Studios
We're going tomorrow. Okay with my niece. What time? Oh, she's gonna freak out. We can cook. They don't close till 2 a.m.
Oh, I want to go tomorrow and it only takes I think if you do the fast pass
You can get done with all the mazes in two hours. So even if you go at like 1130 tomorrow is actually Halloween night, right?
Yeah, it's Halloween night. Yeah. Yeah, we should go. Let's all go. That'd be amazing
Will you go or no? Oh, dude, I would love my sister says that because she already went the mazes are so
Freakin good. She says the poltergeist stranger things is really good. Oh, yeah, you know what knots is a little not up to par
You know, it was great. It was amazing. No the actors
No, but my sister says it's the same in Universal. They come this close. She says I don't know
I want to check out Universal. No, no, it was good. It was good
But it's good that he went into your face like that. That's a bit scared you because scared you enough to do a fucking old-school Chinese
Honestly, I'm on something. Yeah, is that what you would do in a real fight is one of my concern
You'll do a palm strike. No
Just one like that. Oh like that double
Was he taller or shorter? He was like maybe a couple five inches taller than me. Well, I have a question. So who
Could that guy soothed if he was nuts. I don't think could he see it because from
My sister says they come so close that yeah, can't believe that no one has gotten struck before
Yeah, they must not a waiver or something. Yeah
Yeah, no because the reason why he threatened me is because he had self-centered fear
So when you're gonna get so no no when so when people do that like there's you know like hey, man
There's cameras in here
They it's he's really saying I'm scared that you're gonna press charges. Mm-hmm. You know what I'm saying
Yeah, what oh wait wait wait, and how could you he press charges on you? He didn't touch you
No, he was afraid that Steve would press charges. Well, but what but yeah, but why?
He has no
What do you mean? No, no, that's he's afraid that Steve's gonna press charges on him. Yeah, yeah, but what is oh?
Oh, yeah, but he didn't know but he's doing his job getting in your face. That's what it is, right?
So what I'm saying is that I think that's limited you attacked him physically
Yeah, but when he when he's this close, you know, yeah, I know it's it's like this
No, I don't agree with that because it's like if I'm doing stand-up right and I insult somebody
Right and I call them a con or whatever right and then trying to sue me for doing my job
He's doing his job. I guess there's yeah, there's different ways to look at it
Yeah, no, there's only one
Yeah, I love these doctor's toy techniques. There's only one way to look at it. Yeah
Look at me right now. Yeah, it's ice-closing. There's one way to look at it
Yeah, and you assaulted a guy for doing his job. He won't edit this part. We're not why I don't know now
I feel kind of I imagine it happens so many times
It happens all the time. No, no, no, no, no, I struck, you know, we should edit this. Just we're not what we are
How we doing on time? We're only five minutes in really five minutes in we're not even close to being done
I'm sorry for bringing it when you guys were younger. Didn't you you your mom and Steve get stuck in a maze?
I don't know if he remembers, but oh, what's that story? Mom took us to a
Holly a hot like a haunted house back in the 70s in Minnesota. Yeah in Minnesota in Minnesota
And we were stuck in there for like five hours
Yeah, she was screaming. I remember her screaming and us running. Yeah, we were so pitch black back in the 70s
There was no like rules lines or right. There were no lines
So I just remember in the dark just going to each room and mom go
We're crying screaming and we're in a circle running in circles. I remember we never got out of there
I don't remember. Yeah, I remember that. Yeah, I don't remember that at all. Yeah, I totally remember that. Yeah
Well, you were probably
Well, you were in kindergarten. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Why is your eyes squinting right now?
I don't know. I'm thinking about them. They're not scary. I know you
Maybe I shouldn't have brought it up. Do you feel guilty about it a little bit
Do you think that he's gonna press charges it dampen it dampen the mood of the group?
You guys didn't laugh because I would have laughed if you've done no, no, no, no
It well, we we got back to happy the happy fun vibe, but it took a couple other mazes in a roller coaster ride
Get back to hey, this is fun, right? Yeah. Yeah, but you know, here's growth for you
Here's growth for you. So I apologize the rage though. You know when I hang out with you now, which is rare
Yeah, they say hang out with you more when you didn't have a girlfriend. Oh, no, that's not true
Why is that his fault? It's not his fault. I want you to be happy. Yeah, but we do when we do have our moments, right?
Yeah, I used to have this fear
Hanging out with you. Hmm
Are you listening to me? I'm there. I'm on the same page as you. Okay, you are. I love it
This is great. Yeah, there used to be a fear every time that something could go wrong
I'm learning and now it's the fear is less
There do you understand what I'm saying? It's good
Well, I have what therapy is doing for me is I have a
a little bit more of that
Window without window to think about the repercussions before I'd be school
You know, but now it's like, you know, he's showing you that there are so many
Yeah, I have this window and then it's like breathe and think about what you're about to do before you react type thing
And so like one time him and I played FIFA. Oh, dude, and I scored I used it
Oh, I did a straight up punch. I did a guy. Oh street fighter. No, I did a guy. Oh street fighter. Boom
No, no the back
Yeah, like we do that. Yeah, he could not control I could I just spinning back fist
Oh, I pulled knives on him. Yeah. Yeah, I put two knives on him. Why two and how much is one?
How quickly does the situation diffuse after that? Are you guys like after that? You're like, oh, I'm sorry
This is the major difference back then weed marijuana
Right would rage you out. No, I need to calm me down to get the head change back to you know
Remember used to buy me weed and silver like member even in Chinatown. You bought me that little water pipe that golden
You enabled me a couple, you know, it's good. I'm glad that you did that
No, I wouldn't know what would happen was I do a show
Mm-hmm. This is back when marijuana was illegal and sometimes like
People would just hand you drugs
Like I've been handed like
Cocaine. Yeah after shows. Hey, let's do cocaine. Here's some. Yeah, take weed
Right, so I used to get the weed and I'd give it to my brother
Yeah, but it's good that he did that because it helped me kind of go through that faster
Yeah, he got sober on his own. I do it on my own. I just didn't want I didn't like one day
He just called me because I'm sober now. Oh, I thought you convinced him. No, I you can't do that
I knew that he was on his pain anyone who decides to do that. That's their own choice. That's their own decision
Yeah, you know, you can't force someone. No, no, you can't you have to decide on your own
Like I took a 10-year cake and you know, I spoke in front of a bit, you know
I mean, that's that's growth too because you know, that's that's a scary meeting to know he he
I'm gonna say something right now about my brother is that that's the one thing that I
There's a lot of things that make me happy, but
It's one of the things where we were we're at a
We're not even talking supposed to talk about it, but we are at a thing
I think yeah thing and you could just tell that everyone knew who he was
You could tell that he had responsibility there, you know, like he had a set up things like speakers remember we care
Yeah, and people relied on him and he was like I love it. He was really actively
Involved in that group and because I'm not as involved. I'm not at all, you know, I don't go to as many because um, I
Don't know why but um
You know, I made me feel like okay, my brother's taken care of because he's really doing it
He's just a bit of a far better joy to be around this episode was getting good
No, what before it was bad. No, I love it. I love what you're doing keep going
It only is good when I'm praising you yeah
Yeah, well, I mean no no no no
From where you came from my god. I was trying to have sex with street walkers edit that for real
That's what?
With the edit that no, it's okay. Yeah. No, I mean yeah, I mean let's go like I'll be real like I've made some really bad
Choices back then really bad. I mean and this is like even going back to when I went to Arizona State to I mean
I got I literally got jumped at a keg party, you know, and I got beat up
I'd steal my you know, I was with the kid who stole mushrooms from I would see like I would see entities in my ceiling
Ghosts coming out of the wall, you know, I mean like I was not in a good place, you know, so yeah
He was it's good that you know, it's good. It's probably the best decision that I've ever made, you know
I'm not saying it's for everyone people a lot of people could smoke weed and they like they could function even better
You know, I know a lot of people like that. Yeah, but I just I can't do that. I'm not even again
I'm not against weed. I think some people could handle it, you know, it makes them creative
They could be more calmer, but I just can't do it go, you know, I can't do it because if with that
I need I need the beer too. I can't just do one without the other so
Being at the comedy store is getting so hard now because I'm sure there's a lot of marijuana around I did Tripoli show
Yeah, and I was in the green room shout out to Sam
And on the table there was like, you know, his show gets sponsored by all these
Companies that marijuana companies. Oh, sure. Yeah, and so there's like bags of muffins and candy and these kind of sticks and
You know everything you can have and
Everyone's smoking it around you and I'm just kind of going it's at a different level
It's a different level. I mean the potency level of it now because we got ten years ten years ago
They didn't have this that kind of stuff. Yeah, I mean now. I'm sure let's say we were to relapse. We would be in outer space, man
Because it's that potent, you know, like, yeah, I'm surprised you guys don't you guys don't like that stuff, huh?
He's doing college. Okay, you're done with it. I don't imagine you ever really diving deep a lot of weed in Western Carolina
University because it's like in the middle of the hills. They would grow it. Yeah, but with you you're I smoked a lot
I smoked a lot, but you pulled both of you are like people that I don't get why because you could go without it
You don't need it. It's it's it's it's the option is there for you. It's for it's like legal
Yeah, right it you can go into any store and get all a variety of things
Edibles and whatnot and you just you can do it. You just don't yeah
But I also I'm very much aware of my propensity for certain things. I am a very anxious person
I have certain things that are already baseline wrong with me and I just don't I don't want I
Don't want to take anything that might
Exacerbate anything and for me the last straw the last time I took an edible
I had the worst panic attack of my life. Oh, yeah, and after that I thought okay
This isn't conducive to like being balanced at all
So I haven't smoked since and that was what like seven years ago. Yeah, but alcohol
I maybe drink like four times a year
Yeah, but you guys are normies. This is who I am in high school. I had this friend named Brady
He was he could he was so strong. He can pull he could pull a stop sign out of the ground
Okay, he like this inhuman strength. Was he on the wrestling team? No, he wasn't he was cousins
I want to get I don't get in trouble, but so one day there's this guy named Todd
He was an older guy maybe in his early 20s, and he was a weed dealer
So Brady I go Brady. He was kind of like this big
Kind of dumb or kind of a guy and I was a little guy. Yeah, and I was a little guy and I could tell him what to do
That's God is a mice my cement. My son. Yeah. Yeah. He was Lenny Lenny. I go Brady
Open the window to Todd's house and we'll steal his weed
So he broke this window. Oh
Oh, yeah, he broke it. I snuck into the little space. I stole his weed
And then what we did was we put it in my car hit in my car
And we waited Todd to get home and when he got home we rang his doorbell
And he goes I go cake. Can we buy some weed? He goes someone broke into our house
My house and stole the weed and we go and we helped him look forward the guy. Oh my god. You're one of those
We help him look or we go who did that
Right and so for hours him and I we went down the streets
We know we have your piece of shit. Yeah, but I'm I'm one of those drug addicts
You know that there's a there's a one kid easily. Yeah, you know how you know who the suspect is
It's like that one kid who had murdered that little girl and hid her inside his waterbed
Yeah, and when the whole neighborhood on a search, he was the first one to volunteer
But I'll help you. I hope he had his flashlight and everything. I'll help you and in the meantime the girl was based like
In his waterbed. Yeah inside his waterbed. Yeah, where'd you guys hear these stories?
Store and scale. Oh, I can't listen to those
Yeah, and then what happened why why they're gnarly. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, and then what happened was
his mom a
Week later was walking through his
Room trying to clean it or whatever and she see he sees like there's some fluid
Coming from like underneath his waterbed
She goes, what is that the water but popping but it's dark this fluid and she she puts her hand on it. It's red
And she looks in
Underneath the rudder bed and there's a dead carcass of this little drill that's been missing right and now as a mother
She's sat there for like a good five minutes going. What do I do?
And then she she walked on the street and went to a cop and said
My my I found her in my son's bed
Imagine that
And and but check this out. I don't know why you brought this up, but check this out
So he was 14 and he got life without parole
but then later later there was a new I think the Supreme Court said it's
Unethical for a child to get life in prison if they commit a crime even as heinous as that at the age of 14
So all these kids are across the country, right? They got their like cases
Overturned a lot except he was the only one that didn't good because his case was so gruesome
Because he kept tail he
He killed her and then would leave like put him at her underneath the thing at the bed and she could hear her
Coughing so he would pull her back out and kill her again. Like he did and she was like nine
All right, baby, and you brought it up. You brought up the late girl from the waterbed enough
I just didn't want to or I get into anyway
Yeah, sort of scale it keeps me. I had it. I was sleep. I was listening to sword and scale to go to bed
The worst one the most
Space what you know, I need something to listen to to go to bed and I would listen to it and it would be like 11 a.m
And I'm like on my on my fifth one
Yeah, couldn't do it. I listen to the one with the leaves the guy that I would I would have the leaves
Most painful one for me to hear was when that father
He had parasomnia. So while so while he was
While he was sleepwalking. He basically murdered all his kids. No, he tried to kill his kids
But he only killed one. No, he killed two. No, we killed one the little youngest one. Yeah, the youngest one, but he
Um, yeah, he tried to strangle all of his kids. He killed one and oh, he was he was struggling financially too, right?
Yeah, I didn't know you know that one. Yeah
How do you know about it sleep deprived or a long time you and I Lonnie listen to it on the on the the car right to Arizona
Oh, yeah, we're like captivated. Yeah, we didn't like pull off to this truck stops
We're like no no keep playing but even his testimony was heartbreaking because you know, he loved his family
There was just he had been sleep deprived for so long that it
Something crossed over between reality and dream and he ended up like basically hurting his own so they released him
Yeah, but I you know, I actually believe him and there are a lot of
Believe me, but I saw this show on was it like discovery health or something like that where this woman
She during sleepwalking she would go cheat on her partner and have full-blown sex with other people
And come back in scale to no, no, okay
That's her own mind. That's her own mind. That's he wants to do what he wants to do
Yeah, it's very here. I'm gonna say something conch conch controversy. Oh, okay is let me just throw out this idea
Even if it was he was in sleepwalking mode, right sleep mode and he
He he killed his kid and regardless if he had control over his he did do it
Action, right? So but he wasn't aware of it. He wasn't it doesn't matter. He did it
His conscious intent wasn't there. He still did it though. He wasn't conscious. Someone's not alive because of him
Yeah, I realized that you know, and if you're fucking
Cheating on your husband because you're on sleep mode
Right
Right, it's like you cheated, but that's not something she can help
What can so what is the husband to all right? Well, you know next time you're on sleep mode
But if you ever ask me what happened if you're ever off sleep mode then we're in trouble ever
You have no empathy. Yeah, I'll just worry about yeah, get the dogs in
Put both in
Hi Kirby you guys ready for a question. Yeah. Yeah, let's do a question
I'm hopeful vice with Bobby Kalayla and
Stevie we be
Bonjour, my name is Brandon. I'm a 23 year old and I live in central Washington
I think my new mate my new roommate wants to have sex with me
I just moved back from Thailand after living there for eight months
And I found a place with an old co-worker a coworker the guy that owns the house is in his mid 40s
And saying he is not entertaining is an understatement every time I'm in the kitchen
He will come out from the basement wearing his pajamas and every time he has a massive boner
He once told me that he'd rather pay his boys to keep him company rather than a female sex worker
What do I do? Thanks. Wait. Wait. Is this person?
I think it's so it's a 23 23 year old male. He has a new roommate who's a 40 year old man
Uh, and he you're fucking
Move
No, you said what's so wrong with just saying hey, dude, put your dick away, man
Because you don't want that when you're making a grilled cheese sandwich at like one in the morning
You don't want to see your fucking roommates dick. Did you say dude put your dick away?
Yeah, but just the thought that he could be jerking off in the other room and thinking about you is
Right, yeah, Steve you have a new roommate. He's a 40 year old. Uh, he's a 58 year old man comes out with a bulge
Massive bulge walks up. We would have a talk. He hears you make it
He's a 40 year old guy. I'm the 40 year old guy. All right. So just all right. You're making a sandwich
Listen, Troy. No, no, let me I'll come up to you first. I'll be Troy. Yeah
Hey, can you make me a sandwich? Listen, man. Yeah, you can't be doing that around here
It's I own this house. What do you mean? You live in my house
It's just uh inappropriate. You're making me uncomfortable. Okay, but what all I'm asking is to clothe yourself, man
I know I have my pajamas on and I see your penis
But you know, it's but yeah, but my pants I can't help that I have a heart on right now when I look at you. It just
It makes me uncomfortable
I'm just letting you know that looking at you makes me feel uncomfortable because I just want to nut in your mouth
But I can't do it legally because I don't we have a severe problem
We don't have it because I'm never gonna nut your mouth
But it doesn't matter. You're making me very uncomfortable. And if you if you don't do anything about it
I'm moving out. Okay, or you're gonna have to all right. I'm gonna go change. I'm gonna go change. Thank you
I come back with jeans. All right, so I come back with jeans
Can you still make me that sandwich?
I'll make you a grilled cheese sandwich. But yeah, just yeah, my jeans. Yeah, I have my jeans. You see I'm wearing my um
All right, we're good. My hunting jacket
Right, I have a hunting jacket on and my jeans. We're good. But can I let you know right now? Yeah
See, I have a problem with that. I have a problem with that
Now I have a problem with it. You can't see it. Okay. Come back with some more clothes. I'll be right back. I'm gonna change
Yeah, I'll be right back. He has a park on now. Yeah, I come back and I have a hunting jacket. Yeah, I have a problem with that. No, wait, you didn't say anything yet.
I know I have a problem
No, I have a severe problem. You can't I live with you, man. I know. Please. So right now I have a park on a right
I'll pay my rent. I have a park on right. I have all this stuff on. Yeah, right. Can you still make me the sandwich?
I'll make you a sandwich, but just don't I don't hey, hey, Steve. Yeah, please. Don't say anything derogatory
I'm gonna let you know right now. I don't roll that way. I'm gonna let you know right now. I don't have a heart on
Bobby winked for everyone. I winked. Okay. I don't I don't have a heart on you're gonna have to move or I'm gonna have to move
Well, it's my house. So I guess you're gonna have to move then. I'm sorry. Yeah
There's the advice. So there it is. We give you a full on scenario full on scenario right there. There you go, Brandon
That's very helpful. Thank you. Uh, give me another one. Another one
Go on time. Okay. Give me another one
Uh, this one is from our friend, uh, who's gonna be nameless. Hi, Bobby and Kalilah
My boyfriend doth me out of the blue. I thought everything was fun and I was blindsided by the breakup
We used to watch and listen to tiger belly together watch Bobby on splitting up together
And we even went to see Bobby at the comedy store
So I thought who better to come up, uh come to you for advice
He told me I am his soulmate on many occasions
Even when he was breaking up with me. He is my soulmate as well
I need to help understanding why he decided to stop trying and fighting for me
I am moving from LA to New Mexico next week
And I think he tried to push me away to make it easier on him
So he wouldn't have to deal with a long distance relationship. Also the pain of not having me around
I'm having a hard time understanding the whole situation. I feel like I can't let go and move on because of that
We always admired bobbing Kalilah's relationship. So I wanted to come to you guys for advice
Thank you so much for your help and I hope you're all doing well
They just touched foreheads uh unknown female. I have a I have a you know
A fun fact for you
Fun fact
There's no such thing as a soulmate
Okay, you got it. I agree. Yeah, there's one
I think I read a statistic. Oh, baby. You already did this before. I know
I know I make up statistics. Okay, can I make up another one? Yeah
You're compatible with one out of 53 million people on the planet
On the planet
Okay, my brother's not even here anymore. No, no, I'm here. I'm sleeping. No, I'm listening. I'm listening. He's gonna merge right
Um, you bring the little one in too. Let him in
Okay, young lady. Well, I don't know your name is what's her name unknown unknown
Hear me out. Okay. I know you think
That god made this guy for you and he's the only one, you know that you can be with
Because your soul's dance in the inner twilight of life. Okay. What I'm saying is is that
You're gonna find somebody else
Who's also gonna listen to tiger bear belly share your same sensibilities and humor, right?
And who might be better who might not bail on you fight for you because you're you're leaving to another state
Which is totally, you know a place he can travel to as well if you wanted to see you
Yeah, he you know, he's he's not leaving her because she's moving. I think he's driving her to move, right?
No, no, no, she's moving. He's moving. He kind of distance. Oh, well, then you're moving. Yeah
That's that that's he just didn't want to fight for I guess he didn't want to be in a long distance relationship
Then you know what then you don't want to be with him
It's it's
I don't know if he says
Words are so cheap just because he tells you you're his soulmate doesn't mean anything
Doesn't mean anything actions are so much louder than that
And it turns out this guy has no action to give you or show you look things are only gonna get harder if he
It means not gonna fight for you for this then what he's gonna fight for you
Yeah, even if if he agrees to stay on at this point he changes his mind. He's like, okay, let's do the long distance thing
It's tough too long. I doubt he's gonna. He's gonna really pull through for you. Yeah, but he has a tiger belly fan too
So don't shit on him too much. Yes makes you buy merch on six
Be dude go fight for her man if you're listening. Yeah, Jesus Christ
Because if he was really down for it, unless you're not into her then just let her be honest with her and be transparent
There you go
I love you steve. I love you too. Do you I love you so much. I love you so deeply
I know see
12 years before
Yeah, I feel like steve did the bigger gesture because he actually put your face on him
I want can I get one of these two after? Yeah, I want to wear it tonight for sure. Yeah, we'll give you. Yeah
Yeah, well, can I wear one of these? Everyone listen to me. Okay. Yeah
Listen
I thought that I thought this podcast was enlightening
I think it was fruitful. It was fun. There were some moments that we got a little dark
Um, but it was fun. I didn't snap, you know, you didn't snap at all last time what happened last time you snapped
We had to stop. Yeah, everyone had to leave the room. You're gonna go home. It's fine. But now today nothing happened. Thank you
um
Thank you, george for whatever you do
Um, brice back at ya
Tell us about our merch, babe
Guys, we have merch coming on here. Give me this vintage shirt. Oh, I want one of those two shirts right here is so dope
Can I get one of those two? This is tan and red tan and red. Yeah. Yes. Yeah
We've got um sweatshirts. Give me the sweatshirt right here. We got a tiger belly sweatshirt here. Is this a medium? Yeah
Have the king on your face. Okay. Well, can I get this a medium? You can have that one. Oh, hell. Yeah
But this that's not the tan. That's uh, that's an exclusive one just for uh, you see. Yeah, that's a cream one
That's the only one that color. Oh, hell. Yeah. You like that one. I love it
Yeah, we'll wear it tonight. Okay. Good. Um, thanks for listening everybody. I love you guys. Please watch splitting up together
I got some. Can I do some plugs too? Yeah, do some plugs dbweebie show, right?
Okay, so I have um a patreon
So if you go to patreon.com slash dbweebie, I I'm uh offering
You know rare music just on that. Um, I have a new thing on monday's where I do um
Diary logs
Oh, you read old diaries. Well, no where I just it's like a personal log
Where I it's just for my patrons and I do dream interpret. Can I play for you a little bit? Yeah, yeah
Preview, preview, preview, please. Okay, so this is a this is just one of the dream interpretations
um
available only where steve um at uh patreon.com slash steebie weebie
Okay, here we go
Hi, um
Welcome back. This is um
um
the steve weebie audio
I mean the diary vlog I think number four this is I just woke up and um, this is a different edition
This is my dream interpretation edition
So I had a really um kind of a scary dream
Where I possibly could have lost my uh sobriety
Um, this is not going to make any sense, but I'm going to try to make sense of it. Um
Um, so I was on the west side not the west side like boystown and west
That's exclusive content exclusive
And I was with um eric griffin and two other people
And we're at some dive bar
and um
And it was a weird dive bar because it was like
Kind of like a vintage clothing
Steve slash dive bar
Yeah, keep going a little bit more
Like my apartment times two
Weird like arts and crafts stuff there like
And and there wasn't that there was maybe three tables and like
that there was like
Not even a bar, but the bartenders were like old guy kind of like bald guys. Okay, we got it. Okay. Let me tell you something right now
I'm going to join the patreon
patreon.com
That's not like asmr to me. I could have fallen asleep. I almost fell asleep just now. It felt very cozy
Yeah, so I do stuff like that. That's a new thing. I um, I provide a very good
So go to patreon.com slash steve web. You only do them though that those dream things when you really have a bad dream
We do it every time. That was that was the first one. I I'm going to start implementing that
Yeah, but how do you how because I don't ever ever not every time I remember my
Literally when I woke up I grabbed the oh, that's great. I'm here and I just yeah start talking to it. That's great
I have um, I'm working on a new album guys
Oh, so it's called call out. Yeah solo album collage of the mirage
Oh, it's going to be at my um steve weebie band camp calm. Okay. Okay, and then also go to youtube.com slash
steve weebie and check out the steve weebie show
s t e e
b e e
W e e. Yeah, okay, you know what? I'm tired of b e e
You know what? I'm tired of be we be
people going
Hey, you're Bobby lee, right? And I go. Yeah, and we have a discussion and then they'll go till steve weebie. I said hi
And I'm like what?
Yeah, tell him I said hi
I'm like what?
Hey, you know, that's where it's at now. It's good. I'm proud of you. So it's growing, huh, George?
We're all we're close to 60,000 subscribers right now. Yeah, so we're we're getting there
So, uh, you deserve it friend. You guys gonna you guys were all on right?
Yeah
Okay, double you did it. Yeah. Yeah, that was a fun one. We got to do part twos and threes so long
Yeah, what about me? I want to do it again
Part part three part three. Yeah, I got to do it again. All right. Thank you
Okay, thanks guys tiger belly and also if you guys want that was bonus content
We also have a patreon. That's patreon.com slash tiger belly
So make sure you get those because episodes come out on monday
And then officially the official announcement for when merch comes out
It is going to be next week on tuesday the 6th to get all this merch to make sure you follow us on social media
And the website to see updates
Uh, yeah guys follow us at tiger belly on instagram and twitter at the tiger belly and email us any questions at the tiger belly at gmail.com
Kala, where can we follow you? You can follow me at calamity k a k h a l a m i t y k
And get everything bobbily at bobbily live and then you just have to figure out gorgeous stuff. It's it's out
Oh, I didn't do my instagram. Yeah, that's what the instagram. This is it. This is the moment. Okay, so I have instagram
q u a n g o u and we're done
Boom get them to half a million followers. Everyone. Good night
You
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