TigerBelly - Episode 171: Pumpkin Pie Master

Episode Date: December 5, 2018

Bobo rejects George’s pie. Koloko gets a delayed confession. Gilbert redeems himself by way of pralines. We talk Thanksgiving, conversion camp, Julio the sociopath, and a butthole in the fo...ot. Bonus content every Monday:https://www.patreon.com/TigerBellySupport us by supporting our sponsors! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening ad-free on Wondery Plus. Sun, sun, and aria. Sun, sun, and aria. Sisters in the snow. Thank you. Thank you so much. Welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly. My name is Bobby Montgomery Lee. And we are here with the elaborate and very sophisticated George Keimel. We're here also with Gilbert Galons.
Starting point is 00:01:02 Hello, hello. Hello. And we're also here with Kalyla Keon. Hello, Kalyla Keon. Did I get that correct? You did. Kalyla Keon. Where is that from? It's from a northeastern town of Mongolia. Excuse me, sorry. Excuse me. You're Mongolian then?
Starting point is 00:01:22 Ah, interesting. Interesting. We also have Keimel. George Keimel. Where are you from? Origins of your name, sir. Where is that from? The etymology of your name. Yes, the etymology. It's from a small town in southwestern Poland. You don't have to do that with your voice because you just normally sound like that. You normally sound like that. Use your regular voice.
Starting point is 00:01:45 It's German for cumin. Very classy culinary etymology. Wait, I would change my answer. Are we doing real answers? I don't even know my real one. Anyway, let's start for real. The origin of my name is supposed to have an umlaut on top of the you. Oh, yeah, mine too. And it's from either Eastern Europe or Germany. One of the two.
Starting point is 00:02:07 My Korean name is Songwoo, which if you translate, it's stale juice. Oh, man. Stale juice? Yeah, the family of stale juice. Yes, I love it. Anyway, back to me, the captain. Welcome to another episode. Listen, I do have many animals at home. I have three cats, three dogs. We had a Zen master come over this weekend.
Starting point is 00:02:36 What's his name? What's the Zen master? His name is Matt Beisner from the Zen dog. From the Zen dog. Matt Beisner has a show coming out on a f***ing call. Wait, we're not supposed to say it, babe. He never... You can say it again. Say it again. Say it again.
Starting point is 00:02:49 He has a show coming out. A show coming out on some place. Some kind of network. Yeah, yeah. It's like f***ing... MTV. I think you're trying to say MTV. What's going on? Tell us about f***ing...
Starting point is 00:03:03 Yeah. That f***ing... So ridiculous. I don't know what you're saying. I still don't know what you're saying, so it's okay. So he came over because we have a problem puppy, which is everyone knows Julio. And he came in.
Starting point is 00:03:20 He's bald, white, tall, and he's very calm. He's like... Imagine, like, if value met human form. It's true.
Starting point is 00:03:36 Even his presence was so calming for me. And I'm like, oh, s***. I'm not misbehaving right now. Oh, you got Unitran. You didn't want to play video games? Yeah, I couldn't play video games. And then... And that was very quiet.
Starting point is 00:03:53 Do you remember when he first came out, it was very quiet, just looking at him. Let me tell you something about Bobby. Usually when someone new comes into the house, he showcases. He's very loud. He likes to... I'll do a belly roll. I'll do some break dancing moves.
Starting point is 00:04:05 He'll do the worm on the floor. He likes to peacock. But when Matt came through the door, he was immediately subdued into a corner of the home. He just woke up and had two hours of sleep. Well, that too. Okay. Okay, that too.
Starting point is 00:04:19 But he comes in and I didn't say anything until he brings up the fact that he knew that I did stand up. Then I loosened up. Which was like two hours after. Two hours in. Yeah. And you guys have friends in common. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:34 We have friends in common, yeah. I know who his ex-roommate. But anyway, this guy... What? Anyway, this guy taught us how to walk the dogs. He told us about... Dogs have their space.
Starting point is 00:04:53 And human beings, they encrouch the space without even asking if it's okay for the dog. For instance, if you put your hand in front of a dog's mouth, and they pull their head away, that means I don't want to be touched right now. I think before... And you're in my space. But the antiquated way of thinking was always
Starting point is 00:05:14 that you have to dominate your animal. You have to dominate and you have to break them in or something like that. And that's actually not how it works at all. I think it's about mutual respect and that's what he goes by. I have my... Especially for a guy like Julio.
Starting point is 00:05:32 Try saying, try subduing him with your usual dominating tactics. I fucking dare you. I haven't had enough time. No, no. That's a demon dog when you try to walk it. You also keep in mind, George, keep in mind that this guy has studied this
Starting point is 00:05:51 for the past 20 years. So if I'm not going to listen to you, I'm going to listen to this guy. Also, he's worked with wolves. He's studied the behavior of dogs over decades. So between you and him, I'm going to take his advice. You don't even know. George Farms.
Starting point is 00:06:10 I mean, I know that my theory... I know how to discipline to get a dog straight. I have my own theories about it, but I just can't... I don't want to... Is that why it works with... Can I tell you what I would do? Can I tell you what I would do? Yeah, go ahead.
Starting point is 00:06:29 I'll book a two-way ticket for all the three dogs to Yulin, China. We'll go to the dog-eating festival. I'll have them leashed, and I will bring them in the middle of the festival, and I will look at each one of them in the eyes and go, this is the alternative. I like it. It's like a scare attack.
Starting point is 00:06:48 Yeah, scare straight. Yes, it's my version of it. And then I'd make them eat a stew. You make out their own dog. You make the cannibals immediately. You eat the stew of another dog. And then I'm going to go to Peru with my cats and go, you know, there's a cat-eating festival there.
Starting point is 00:07:09 In Peru. And I'll bring all my cats there and go, this is... Hey, you want... Because they have this thing where they throw the cat in this kind of stadium, and they try to bow and arrow the cat. Oh, it's like that. Yeah, it's like hunger games.
Starting point is 00:07:25 And I'll bring Goonie and go, look, you want to compete? Behave. Stop pooping on the floor. He also made a very interesting point about just being alpha. He's like, you know, we've domesticated dogs for however long, like thousands of years, right? Or I don't know how many years.
Starting point is 00:07:42 The fact that you have to show dominance in that way means that you're not alpha. We've domesticated them. They already know we're alpha. That means you're beta. If you have to constantly assert yourself in that way and show them who's boss, maybe you're not alpha. So another thing that he said also was that the likelihood that Julio was ripped off the mom
Starting point is 00:08:02 at two weeks old, I don't know his history, those early two weeks, but he says that Julio's brain is likely underdeveloped. He didn't get the nutrients that he needed. And he's comparable to like a sociopath. He's missing parts. He has missing screws altogether. It makes so much sense.
Starting point is 00:08:21 With that dog, yes. There's just something so off about him, even when he was three weeks old, he was already lifting his... Is that not normal? He's hypersexual. He's a very primal dog. Very sexual, yeah. I mean, he still tries to fuck Gobi. And we took his nuts away.
Starting point is 00:08:38 But that's not the most abnormal part about him. The most abnormal part about him is just his cues and the way he responds to things. Take my nuts away. See what happens. I feel like you're nuts. What would happen? I would literally just be a jelly on the couch. I would have no reason to live.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Take my nuts away. You want them? You want to be a eunuch? Is that what they call it? Game of Thrones, right? But he has no dick either. That's a eunuch, right? Wait, could you just have the... I've always thought about that.
Starting point is 00:09:13 I knew a guy, a kid who went to Greece. Not the play, but the country. He didn't go into the play. And he went to Greece and he was on a moped. And he got in an accident and his dick got ripped off. Off his old dick? He's from my hometown. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:35 And I think they attached half of it. Yeah, and I think it still kind of works. Yeah. Does he have balls? It works, I said. I don't know. I haven't seen it. Yeah. But when I heard about it, I thought to myself, oh man, and then you imagine yourself.
Starting point is 00:09:52 Would I be able to function in society without a penis? And I think I would. And I'd stay with you. Thank you. And I think... Thank you. And I think that in many ways, it would be different life. In what ways? Well, I mean...
Starting point is 00:10:15 I don't like the way you said, um... Well, in the ways of like, you know, you... Not now, but like throughout my whole life, you know, you thought... I thought about women or Kalylo sex often. And that's just... That's like... It consumes a certain section of your day. Sure.
Starting point is 00:10:34 It's always there, right? And it's almost as like, oh, it's a waste of time. It's like, why do you constantly think about it? So if I had no dick and balls, I might have gotten a lot done. What do you think? Interesting. Maybe. But you say a lot of times that the reason
Starting point is 00:10:52 you wanted to be great at stand-up, initially the driving force was that girls would look at you. So maybe you wouldn't have that same desire. So you wouldn't... You would just like live as a blob. No, because you still... That's only half of it. The other half, though, is survival, right? Like, you know, in this society we live in,
Starting point is 00:11:16 this modern-day society, all that's capitalism, all that. Right? It's either me living in the desert, right? You know, in a cliff. I don't know how desert people live. I don't know if you said cliff, but yeah. Yeah, thank you, man. Thank you so much.
Starting point is 00:11:34 And no, I would probably want to still be a part of society and make a living. And so a lot of my motivations was also financial to do stand-up. Because I'm like, I can't just work at coffee shops for the rest of my fucking life. I never really buy anything. Wouldn't you need a testosterone to be active? You can see...
Starting point is 00:11:59 Without a dick, you still have a lot of testosterone. Your testosterone is a hormone that actually starts in your adrenal glands. Yeah, you didn't know that? The ingredients needed to make testosterone that is eventually so... You don't tell me about adrenal glands for a while. I'm a man.
Starting point is 00:12:17 Yeah. Not all of it, but I'm just saying some of it. Yeah, it stores in your adrenal glands. Where was it, sorry? Adrenal glands. Adrenal glands, okay, yeah. It's right there. It absorbs through your molecules.
Starting point is 00:12:28 Yeah, and then it makes its way down, and then it gets finally packaged. Goes under the knees, huh, babe? What? It goes all the way down to the knees and back up. It's stored in your kneecaps, actually. The adrenal glands, right? Goes right down to your knees.
Starting point is 00:12:40 Yeah. It comes back up, shoots to your elbows, right to your temples, back down to your glands. And then there you are, have it. Wow. Your glands. Not efficient route. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:12:50 It's a very efficient route. Is it? It's quick. It's quick? It's very quick. Well, the answer is my question then. If I had to choose a dick or balls, I would definitely just keep the dick.
Starting point is 00:12:58 The shaft, sorry. I would keep my balls. What? You just said I don't need it for testosterone. Yeah. No, no, no, no, no, no. That's what I was worried about, was if I didn't have balls,
Starting point is 00:13:06 I wouldn't need your balls. What? What? What? What a gland! What happened? What happened to the glands part? You said adrenal glands.
Starting point is 00:13:14 You have to understand me. You thought that the testosterone is made in your adrenal, but then stored in your dick shaft? No. I was thinking if I had to choose one, what could I live without? I would rather keep my... Imagine.
Starting point is 00:13:26 I told you guys that it's stored in your sac. It's stored in your sac. You're shit together, lady. Well, that didn't stay sac. It's also adrenal glands. Yeah. You think that's just what you need the storage facility. Is that what you're saying? You need a storage facility You're saying that could we function without a sack? Okay, so what I'm saying is
Starting point is 00:13:47 Yeah, what do you say chop your dick off and not your balls? Listen, okay, they're your gonads is where your testosterone name in high school. Oh, really? Why would they call you that I don't know why So there's two places where your testosterone is made your adrenal glands and then your latex cells which are in your gonads right and together They make testosterone and it's You don't want to chop off Your gonads because that's where it's made. Yeah
Starting point is 00:14:34 I'm gonna just say this without my dick the balls can go. Okay, but what's worse exactly? Why would you want the drive if you don't have the tool? That's what I'm saying. So why do why I don't want any of it? Why would you want like gasoline without the automobile? Yeah, just to light the fire outside of your home. I've never thought of it that way. That was gonna now That was very good analysis. Where do you put the gasoline, you know? Yeah. Yeah, where do you put it? What did the body naturally find a place like would it go to my breast? Do you think that your tits will get hard? Maybe You get erect somewhere else. I
Starting point is 00:15:08 Used to have this fantasy that um, you would die without testosterone by the way. Okay, you need you need it If I was some sort of mutant and I had like My right hand I was born with a vagina sure Right, okay. I imagine how cool that would be cool. Yeah, just a tight vagina on your right hand on my right hand Okay, I'm in my head now. Yeah. Yeah, thank you continue and then you know, I still have pee pee down there This is a fantasy. Anyway, um I don't know why I just
Starting point is 00:15:43 You also smiled too and she was like dick. That's way too easy. That is like the bottom of my foot then I don't want yeah We're much better. That's very challenging. I know I know what you would do. Yeah, you would you would intentionally remove like six of your ribs What? Yeah, so that you would be more flexible. Oh, yeah Oh, yeah, I can't do it. Yeah. Yeah, you know what? I always thought that God fucked up I think here's here. So here. Here's where I know you guys believe in the Lord Jesus But this is where God fucked up. This is a Christian podcast. It is it is but think of it this style Okay, the asshole should be on the bottom of your foot
Starting point is 00:16:19 No, yeah, yeah, I'm with us. Yes to hear me out. Okay, so let's say it's on everyone's right foot So the shoes you would develop is you have a little hatch on the bottom of the shoe, right? And all you don't even you don't even have to fucking go to a bathroom You just put your foot out just put your foot out right in a field like a dog would you shit It's not embarrassing. Okay, so then you're telling me that That okay, cuz your GI system Consists of your mouth all the way down to your anus, right? You're telling me now all of these things to right leg who has to travel down your quadriceps
Starting point is 00:17:01 Yeah, and down of down into your fucking gastrocnemius. Yeah down into your little fucking feet. Yeah, yeah Yeah, that's what I'm saying into a hole that would change the game in MMA latex Could I just say this though? From my mouth to my asshole calf. It I don't feel nothing It works. You don't think you'd feel it So why would why would I think that it's good from the from the stomach to my foot? What what this is a little extra mile your foot is supposed to take you places not hinder you it won't hinder me Well, you listening sketchers You had the wheelie now you have the hatchet poop
Starting point is 00:17:38 Or we have an ad That's the good segway now back to the show. Um Speaking of 23 and me They have to develop one for dogs. Have I talked to you? With the how can we have never done it? Um cuz I was told that some companies are really kind of full of shit Like my friend who had like for sure a hundred percent like pit bull, right? Right, it looked like a pit bull white paws everything was pit bull Yeah, but she just did it just to kind of like, you know humor herself. Yeah, and it came with some
Starting point is 00:18:12 Funky results and actually a couple people told me that I don't think it's very specific But I think that there is then why do we trust the human ones? Well, we shouldn't be talking about we had 23 and me. Yeah, I trust the human ones Bobby especially 20 20 23 is the best one, but I'm gonna find the genetic testing a good one for dogs because I want to know I Want to know what all my animals have I want to know how exact how old Remy is we don't know how old Remy is people are saying he's six or seven. No, that dude's 15, bro And it's old dude. He's shake. He's just an old fucker And we don't know people can make assumptions. Yeah. Yeah, but they go away. You can tell by the teeth
Starting point is 00:18:55 That's what they said the other day. I go. Yeah, but he's missing some yeah That also depends on whether or not they've ever received like cleaning right? So we don't know. Yeah, Remy could be well. He doesn't have front teeth. He's pungg. Yeah, so he could be way older What is that? What are you doing? You're so dumb George. Oh my shirt. Is that me and Bobby? No, no, let me look at that shirt. It's this Stevie or Gilbert PD Is that Steve? No, it's Gilbert and Bobby or Gilbert and Bobby. Look at Bobby's face Yeah, that's me to the left with the beanie
Starting point is 00:19:32 Yeah, I'm so glad I'm not in that picture. I wonder how they would write it. Who did that shirt? Shout out to Ki-Wong Lee It's my favorite Ki-Wong Lee. Yep, Ki-Wong Lee. You're out Slap kingdom. You're out of slap kingdom. No longer. No, that's that's that's blasphemy. He was slept king for the week I thought that's blasphemy right there, dude. We're just tiny little gooks holding the white man. The white man's hand That's America right there, dude Yeah, but you're holding his hand anyway and look at look at Gilbert just a fucking yes, man for days Look at that smiling so much. I'm smiling so much. You know what makes me sad guilt is that you look like one of those like Poor Filipino kids that I see back there with an oversized shirt and I'm like, nooo
Starting point is 00:20:21 Can I have halo halo? Yeah George looks cool in that though. That's a pretty cool shirt. They only made one of them. No, I Found his art. I found his art on Instagram and you made it yourself. You made that? You're a loser. Oh God It was my I should have fired it was my birthday present to me. He made a he made the art for my birthday So I made myself a T-shirt for my birthday. So how do you you find you can find the art?
Starting point is 00:20:46 You said any two art that I find online. I can make a new t-shirt. Yeah, how baby We just contact like yeah, or like a level pressure something. Oh, there's so many shirts. I want to make do it Can you do it for me? You can do that. You let us know we'll do it. Why can't we are they all of your face? Yeah, why can't we get one of those machines here? We could we have George. We have a presser. We have a screen print, but you don't know how to use it We've used it. Yeah, would you use it on just making simple stuff for the fans at the life? He's a few like of the steby little ray shirts all little ray shirts Yeah, the ones uh all the all the ones at the live show remember. Yeah, we gave it folks. Yeah, all leaders
Starting point is 00:21:24 So you got a stevie went to Thanksgiving too. Do we talk about that? No, where'd you guys go? So we went to San Diego, I have a cut my okay, so I have cousins I have 28 first cousins. I don't think you guys know this It's a lot. We have most of them. Most of them. I don't talk to how many would you say are close to none? Oh, really, but the ones that I'm closest to It's probably these two Eddie and Jenny. Oh, I do. Yeah, and then the rest and then the rest of them Sharon The Catherine Catherine was also there who when I was growing up. I didn't know her at all Mm-hmm
Starting point is 00:22:01 But other than that, I mean I don't and then when I was in Portland, I saw Paul Troy one of my other cousins, but um, yeah, we went down there and I saw my uncle And my aunt which I haven't seen in your dad's side on my dad's side my dad's brother I haven't seen him in like five years, but Steve hasn't seen him in like 25 years You know and so when we walked in my brother was very happy You know, you know how gleeful Steve. He was right. He was like, oh my god I can't believe it and we actually had a pretty good time. I've had we did I actually really really like your family Yeah, my family. I really like Jenny. I love Jenny. Yeah, I love Eddie Catherine was great. Her kids were great
Starting point is 00:22:45 Yeah, and her kids. I'm telling you guys are subhuman It actually meeting his family made me want to have children with him What's with the kids because it turns out he was just a little um, he's a he's a blip. He's like a What do you mean? People in your family are actually kind of they're tall. Yeah, they're super well They're I'm no blip. I'll tell you that right now Like cat like Catherine's kids. Yeah are like one of them this girl Malia
Starting point is 00:23:18 17 maybe five nine beach volleyball star model Just a fucking specimen and her sons are specimens. One is like being drafted to the Yankee. Yeah. What? Yeah Spets specimens. Spets amends. Yeah. Yeah spets amends and then look at in Steve and I the trolls of the family You're so tiny compared to it. Yeah, we're just like, you know, man. We're they didn't at first They didn't even know what to do with us in what we do you mean? Which is like weird guys. They're like, they know sure those kid They're all in high school. One of them is a college, but they're like, they're 50 Right, I mean think about it. We come in right look at Steve. Yeah
Starting point is 00:24:00 Look at everyone knows Steve, right? He's in his mid 40s, but they look at him to go that dude is almost 50 Right and then we went up and played ping pong and he tried to challenge the The super athlete in his family and got no No, no, no, no, I could just say this right now and And I I will I believe this to the day I die Okay, if I have the space it would have been completely different Was like in a tiny room. I play What's so funny
Starting point is 00:24:37 You have the same disadvantages as they have unless they understand that I play a deep ball, right play style, right? So they play close to the table. I'm way back. I like I like this. I like the ball to drop Right. And there was no room for that. Right when I was at mad TV Frank Frank Calliando who's a master. Do you know that his dad is a master who's a good? Yeah, he's one of the best Frank Calliando him and Judah Friedlander who are both comics are masters of ping-pong, right? I can't beat them, but I can rally with them. And if I have the space Right, there was no space up there. I don't think you could have beat Jenny No, I can't get Jenny Jenny's the best. But Jenny though is was almost pro tennis player. Yeah. Oh, there you go
Starting point is 00:25:24 Yeah, she knows she's a beast. She is yeah Eddie's a beast too. They're all my brother's good, but Jenny is the best that aren't all right. I'm just saying she's schooled you guys Jenny's better than Jenny's amazing. Yeah, Jenny's amazing. She's always been amazing, but we went down there. Yeah, and Here's the one thing I have about Thanksgiving. I just don't eat it The food you don't like the food. I had never been to a house in Thanksgiving Where I sat down and went wow, I wish I could eat this every day. It's I'm always there late The food's been out Right, this is so true. Can they go mine? What Kim you didn't eat at my last year
Starting point is 00:26:05 At yours either like you picked at it. I noticed you didn't eat it. Yeah, I didn't even when he comes to mind He doesn't really eat. I don't eat it. Yeah. Yeah, I just don't think that the Thanksgiving Classics are your thing like I don't think you're a big turkey guy. No, I don't think you're a big cranberry sauce guy You know, I'm a fucking big fan of those things. Really? Yeah, I just like it at restaurants And here's another thing dude. I've never gone to anyone's house except except for Kalaila and my mom maybe Where I went that's good Hmm at home I've never been to a house where I went wow
Starting point is 00:26:44 I always eat half of it to be polite and then make some sort of excuse. I have stomach issues Well, you know, I'm not that hungry today or whatever or I'm sick. Yeah, right, but like I don't eat at people's houses I hate it. Why is that? I think in your head you're at restaurants. No way home Right, so what you're saying to me this is if I went to bestia Okay, well the best restaurant in LA. Well, I'm just saying right If I went to someone's house and they had food like bestia, I'll tell you who's house I'd like to eat at Curtis's and you're gonna say that
Starting point is 00:27:24 Curtis don't can cook me All right, you know what David Chang sure I'll go to David Chang's house Yeah, you can cook me a little breakfast or a meal whatever Bobbi-Fly. Yeah, yeah, right, but I'm not gonna eat at Steve's house My brother already makes a meat carne asada. Yeah, but yours is the only one I'll eat And when she makes it to me, it's restaurant style But see it's like you're but you're not gotten not being fair with this It's like if you went to bestia saw somebody's table after 45 minutes of them eating when like took a piece of chicken They're turkey from their plate and they're like this isn't as good as like home-cooked food
Starting point is 00:28:02 No, you're you're misunderstanding what I'm saying is that yes I sometimes I'm late, but I'm talking about even food if I'm there and it's fresh and you didn't even give his pumpkin pie a chance You're pumpkin pie and now you want to start shit. Who's it good? Just wait who are you talking to? You. I point out the good part about your pumpkin pie. All right, you want to start some shit? Oh, I'll start? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I will start you out. Hold it, I want to start off by saying. I was gonna say I'll go ahead, babe I want to start off by saying that I'm already not a big pumpkin pie kind of gal so I'm not a good judge However, I do appreciate the fact that your pumpkin pie was number one not too sweet number two
Starting point is 00:28:39 It felt both like a meal and a dessert why I'm gonna eggs in it There's always Fucking quiche bro a quiche. Yeah, like an egg. Yeah, like a breakfast quiche Now if you said this is quiche oh, yeah, that's good quiche delicious, right? But when I ate it that was no fucking pie I'll tell you that right now dog. Oh, that's cuz you know No, that's because there's no fucking flavor of fakeness. You're just you've never had a real pumpkin pie That's a real pumpkin pie. You don't even know what a real pumpkin pie tastes like. I fucking went to pumpkin pie to the fucking pumpkin Masked stir. Did you hear what he said?
Starting point is 00:29:14 Did you hear that sentence? Did you hear that sentence? Did you hear that sentence, dude? That's a real sentence, motherfucker. Don't ever come at me like that. Okay. I stand corrected. Oh, yeah, stand corrected. Oh, all right I went there. I went there. When you lose, you lose. Oh my goodness. All right. Like the last word pumpkin pie mask. I don't know what he said. Can I see something to do? Can I see something to do?
Starting point is 00:29:39 Don't fucking talk to me like that. All right in my house. I just said you want to. That's another thing. It's just like don't give me a pie. Don't give me a pie. God damn it. I can't win here. Your pie wasn't good. Did you eat at all? Is it still in the refrigerator? Half of it's gone. But it's still there. There's only one person eating it. It's me. I will not eat it. Maybe it's good now. Maybe it's good now.
Starting point is 00:30:03 Marinated. Maybe I'll eat some tonight. Yeah. Right. But I've had better pumpkin pie. Is it supposed, can he serve it with a little bit of whipped topping up top? Oh, yeah. Okay. I'll do that for him. Maybe it will give him the full experience. Listen, you brought over a pie. I had a tiny little slice. I was being fucking cool about it. All right. And you could have let it go at that, right? But if you want to challenge me, I'm going to tell you right now, friend, thank you for baking and putting the time in. But next time I pass.
Starting point is 00:30:31 Okay. I'm bringing you places. I wish I could talk to people the way you talk to people. Yeah. All right. So fucking rude. Thank you so much. Don't put in the effort because it's not going to be validated. All right. It sucked.
Starting point is 00:30:49 All right. It's a waste of fucking space in my refrigerator. Anyway, but thank you. Happy Thanksgiving. I enjoyed it very much, George. Thank you. Like these things, like these things. Okay. I just buy this. All right. So I'm going to say this, right? Look at this right here.
Starting point is 00:31:07 This right here is a ripped. A River Street. This right here is a River Street sweets candy store. Famous Praline, right? I've had three of these already. So good. This is why I just buy stuff. Okay. So this Gilbert is Gilbert back on your good side
Starting point is 00:31:23 after he forgot the Hawaii. Has he redeemed himself? Yeah. He really did. He also redeemed himself by because I was angry with him because he was gone for so long. He didn't do the Patreon.
Starting point is 00:31:41 Were you there for the patrons? God damn it. That's the price here, man. Were you there? Yes, I was there. I forgot if he was there. Don't bake him a pie again. You already disrespected me on the Patreon.
Starting point is 00:31:57 Don't wear that shirt again. Did you always want to fight, bro? Yeah. You're being very feisty today. That shirt, though, man. Oh, we love Ridge Wallet. Ridge Wallet, my friend. Everyone loves it.
Starting point is 00:32:13 It's just off of that island in the Bay of Bengal. Oh, with the natives? The Sentinelese. So this kid, he's like a missionary. He wanted to spread the word of the kingdom of God. So these people
Starting point is 00:32:29 that are so remote that it would be such a risk for any interaction to even take place. He had been there before, I think. I think he survived. There's something like that. Or they beat him up and then they let him go. Yeah, because they're so secluded that they don't even have like a flu could be
Starting point is 00:32:45 as bad as the Black Plague. Yeah, they have not had any contact with him. No contact at all. And so this guy kept insisting that it was his mission to spread the word of God. And he got killed. And even though it's sad
Starting point is 00:33:01 that a 26-year-old kid, essentially, is killed, I mean, what the fuck do you think is gonna happen, bro? What's gonna happen is this, those people on that island, they're gonna be in hell for the rest of their lives.
Starting point is 00:33:19 I mean, they have eternal damnation. That's a missionary on them. You don't kill a servant of the Lord. You're so dumb. Not being real. I'm being real right now. Dude, the dude tried to reach out
Starting point is 00:33:37 to a group of people that don't know about the Lord Jesus. Right? And what they do, they kill the messenger of the Lord. They're going to fucking hell. We should obliterate that whole fucking island. Can the government do anything?
Starting point is 00:33:53 You know that he's being facetious, right? What does that mean? What does it mean? You need to clarify your stance on this because I feel like people really believe that's how you feel. People are listening right now. If you believe what I just said,
Starting point is 00:34:09 then just turn the machine that you're listening to this podcast off and don't come back. Because if you're that dumb, then you've got something else happening. I don't think he's being facetious. I didn't complete one idea though. I think I was with you. What it is is this.
Starting point is 00:34:25 My real opinion though about it is that he died, that's sad. It's his fault. It is. No one should be going to that island and let them live in peace and end the story.
Starting point is 00:34:41 But they murdered someone. Are you kidding me? Are you kidding me? Are you being facetious? Are you being facetious right now? Facetious. Gilbert's always facetious. Anything could kill them Gilbert.
Starting point is 00:34:57 They're protecting their lives essentially. They don't want any part in this society, in this world. I don't even want to say the word primitive because I feel like they're way more advanced in a sense. To be able to sustain
Starting point is 00:35:13 life there without contact with the rest of the world. Leave them. They deserve that. We shouldn't tamper with that. They haven't even discovered fire have they? I'm not sure. I studied up on this long ago.
Starting point is 00:35:29 I just read about it but I think they might have not even discovered fire. They just have... They discovered fire you fucking idiot. What are the people called? Can you get Wi-Fi there? They're probably just faking it. I'm being real. Can you get Wi-Fi there?
Starting point is 00:35:45 No, it's way in the middle of the ocean. It's in the Bay of Bengal. If I'm there I can't download any movies or nothing? No. What I feel bad, mostly bad about is not even... you can say he's so arrogant that person to think
Starting point is 00:36:03 he could just go over there and who does he think he is trying to spread the word of God. But I feel that maybe he was a victim of early indoctrination. Is that what he called, George? I do believe that the people that... It's not like
Starting point is 00:36:19 somebody said something to him. He really believed it, babe. Some old white dude. He's from America. He's an American. His name is John Chow. But still Asians do interact with white people, right?
Starting point is 00:36:35 They do. I'm assuming that he's from some sort of white church and somebody said you have to spread the word. He's like, I'm going to this island. Oh yeah, good luck. I want you to do it. I think there is just even conditioning on his part.
Starting point is 00:36:51 What would it say? They don't know how to make fire. No. Stone Age people of North Sentinel. That's what you googled? Sentinel. You spent all that time trying to prove me wrong? This whole time. You said that you could yell that. Don't know how to make fire.
Starting point is 00:37:07 You can do that? Well, it felt good at the time, but now it doesn't feel good. It felt really good when I discovered it. American German citizen. So you're saying the people should have been like, hey dude, maybe don't do that. That's dangerous. You might die. They didn't help him out. I think it's 100%
Starting point is 00:37:23 and also it's like I believe that in many ways Christianity across the world like in Nigeria. Is it Nigeria where those Christians went was at Ghana where Christians went
Starting point is 00:37:39 to an African country to preach Christianity and then they made homosexuality legal, but a death sentence. Ooh, stoning. Yeah, so
Starting point is 00:37:55 and white Christians from America went to these other countries. White Christians. Islam has done the same thing in Africa. So you know it's all a little bit over there. My aunt and uncle were missionaries in Africa. Do they preach that homosexuality is an abomination
Starting point is 00:38:11 and that they're going to go to hell? I don't know. Does your religion believe that? Low-level. Yeah, but they do believe that. So let me ask this. If I was gay and I was a part of the 7-day
Starting point is 00:38:27 what are they called 7-day? Avertise. Being facetious right now. SDA, babe, SDA. SDA, right. If I was a part of that organization and I went up to... Do you have a reverend who's the headhunter?
Starting point is 00:38:43 Pastors, yes. Pastor what? Pastor Kimmel. I just want to let you know that I think I'm gay. What would they say? Most of the conservatives would say like, we'll pray for you then.
Starting point is 00:39:01 But they wouldn't try to convert me or... We don't have those conversion camps in Adventism. No. I think there's a few very conservative pastors and I've heard of people getting sent to these but actually the conversion camps are just fuckfests. Because it's all the gay kids
Starting point is 00:39:17 finally around other gay kids. So it's a theme park. So you want to get sent there. I've heard of this like that it does not work at all. I'm not even gay and I want to go. It's just like a summer camp for them. A watch. If you go to the right ones, I'm sure they're shitty ones.
Starting point is 00:39:33 I don't want to be gay anymore. Send me to the camp. Yeah, he comes back with no asshole. It just disappears. They took it out that dad. Yeah. He was fucked out of him. So they don't believe in it. No.
Starting point is 00:39:53 I think that... I know there's a lot of religious people listening to our podcast and I'm going to be completely honest with you and this is not funny. This is not a comedy thing that I'm going to say. But what I really believe... I believe this.
Starting point is 00:40:09 If you took away some of the weirdness out of your religion, if you took away like the gay thing, stop saying that being gay is an abomination and you accept them into your religion, that would be
Starting point is 00:40:25 an easier sell for me. Right? If you stop saying that women don't have the right to choose. Or that we have dominion over animals. There's a bunch of things, little things that they change and I'd be more like
Starting point is 00:40:41 I can stand by the god stuff. Right? Without these little weird things that I don't agree with. Why are you smiling? Because I gave a look at the dominion to animals and then Cliley gave me a look back. What do you mean the dominion of animals?
Starting point is 00:40:57 I think that people mistreat animals more because of the Bible. I think there's a lot of literature that tells people that they have to have dominion over animals. I think that animals and humans coexisted in a more sustainable way
Starting point is 00:41:13 previous to religion. That's what I believe. I don't know if there's any truth or history to that but that's just what I think. Based on what I've read as a good Catholic girl growing up is that they don't treat Catholic people don't have
Starting point is 00:41:29 they don't treat animals well. Especially the Philippines, it's horrible. Yeah man. And they don't even have a second thought about kindness to animals. I honestly and you guys
Starting point is 00:41:45 are going to mock me and chastise me about what I'm about to say theses. But I'm leaning more toward whatever that is you're talking about. What is it? About being
Starting point is 00:42:01 free of eating animal and mistreating them. By me eating them by me eating them I'm a part of the problem. I don't necessarily think that there's I'll eat the fuck out of fish but other than that.
Starting point is 00:42:19 But you see that guy that fish that visits that guy every day and he's like getting petted and stuff. I mean they could be sentient too. I don't necessarily think there's I don't think it's wrong inherently in its core for the human body to crave meat
Starting point is 00:42:35 and to eat meat. It's just the way that meat is put on your plate these days. It's just wasteful. It's really bad for the environment and we're doing it in such like it's in a really like irresponsible way. Inhumane mass production and most of it ends up
Starting point is 00:42:51 not even in your belly. Most of it just goes out to waste. And it's just like the way it's done. That's why when I go out and I get muscles or food from the ocean I don't feel bad.
Starting point is 00:43:07 I use my body to do that. But not everyone has the luxury to do that. Even though someone like Joe Rogan goes out shoots his elk. Wonderful. He does it in a way that is essentially guilt free.
Starting point is 00:43:23 He uses his legs and muscles to do that. Rich man sport to be able to go out and shoot elk with your buddies. Right? Not everyone can do that. Not everyone can take a trip to the ocean like me and be like,
Starting point is 00:43:39 yeah I'm going to spear fish. I find it to be a luxury. People have nine to five. They have kids. They can't do that. It's easy for me to say but it's actually you know. Like if you go up to YouTube what are you typing?
Starting point is 00:43:55 Baby chicks being ground up. Alright baby. I know. Thank you so much Bobby. How long did it take you? What? Baby chicks being ground up. Have you seen it?
Starting point is 00:44:11 I'm not going to show you. I'm going to be honest with you. That was the first time when I saw that video. A video like that where I went, oh there's something inherently wrong with that. Taking little yellow, cute little chicks into a machine
Starting point is 00:44:27 and they just get ground up into like red. And then back and then nuggets from them. I didn't know those were nuggets. So my point is that anyway, wow what a target gun. Wait are you going vegan?
Starting point is 00:44:43 Is that what you're saying? He has to go vegetarian first then vegan. I'll go vegetarian first Veganism is tough man. Wait I did 3 weeks, remember? Oh the vegetarian one. Yeah earlier this year remember?
Starting point is 00:44:59 He did 3 weeks and he actually did a really good job. I cheated once. Wait reveal it. Tamas will tell me now. Was it only once babe? Only one time. You're a fucking liar. But I'm going to tell you how I did it.
Starting point is 00:45:15 You promised me too. You swore on your parents life. And my dad's dying. There we go. Guess that's logical. Remember we went to Malibu and they go I'm going to go get taquitos.
Starting point is 00:45:31 Do you remember? Do they have potatoes? They have potato taquitos. And they walked in there. They have potato taquitos. They didn't have any. They have potato tacos. I wanted taquitos.
Starting point is 00:45:47 Do you have potato taquitos? They go no senor. We have the chicken ones. And we drove all the way over there to Malibu. And I was like I'll just eat it really quickly here. So I ate a chicken taquito on there. That's fine.
Starting point is 00:46:03 Are you angry? I'm not angry that you ate the taquitos. I'm angry that you were so... I shouldn't even say anything! Why did you say that? Then you think it's now it's safe to say. I can say it now. It's safe. She won't get mad.
Starting point is 00:46:19 But you are mad. I'm mad about the lie. Oh my gosh! She's mad again at me! You cannot be trusted. See! Look at her! Look at what she's doing! How untrustworthy. Two and a half weeks ago.
Starting point is 00:46:35 It was two and a half weeks in. It was towards the end. That's halfway through. It didn't even last the month that we had decided. Why did you say that? You had it man. I would have almost trusted you. You were almost there babe.
Starting point is 00:46:51 You would have earned my trust. Are you angry right now? But you know what? I trust you for coming forward eventually. A little late. You gotta get some credit. That's all that matters right? I do credit you now for finally being honest. It's never too late to be honest.
Starting point is 00:47:07 Just throw that out there. You should shame me. Shame. What else have you lied about? Tell me everything else. That's it. But what? The way you look on your face right now
Starting point is 00:47:23 is of a man with many secrets. Many secrets! I told you everything already! Look how defensive you are. Anyway, give me the... When I was younger I would want to know everything of every detail. Now I just don't.
Starting point is 00:47:41 Don't tell me. If there's anything that makes me feel guilty I'll eventually come out. I don't think so. He just did the food one. I've told you everything. I do feel guilty about it. Really?
Starting point is 00:47:57 In my head for the last six months I'm like, how do I say it? Wait for six months? How do I say it? Even after I ate it and it was walking back to the car and they asked me how was the potato tequito? It was so good but I was like
Starting point is 00:48:13 oh my god you just cheated. But don't you stop and wonder why I didn't go to the tequito place with you and check on you and why I stayed in the car? Because trust. Yeah, not only that
Starting point is 00:48:29 but there was a part of me that thought you know what? I didn't want to see him I didn't want to catch him in a lie. Is that why you didn't go in there with him? I knew you were going to get those rolled chicken tequitos babe. You really knew that? I think you knew.
Starting point is 00:48:45 We both have a problem. I didn't want to do the gotcha moment. I didn't want to go there and be like what are you doing this? I'm just going to Jesus take the wheel. The last question please. On hopeful advice
Starting point is 00:49:01 with Bobby Kalaila I can't believe you revealed that. I feel like she might have stabbed you. Yeah. I'm a long time listener with a question for you. When I was 18 years old my brother who was 24 years old died from a sudden illness.
Starting point is 00:49:19 This was a great loss to me and my family and that experience modeled me into the man I am today. 10 years have passed since then and I still have no idea how I should answer the simple question do you have any siblings? This is especially difficult on dates. On one occasion it was brought up on our second date and I responded
Starting point is 00:49:35 I did. He died when I was 18 and then we proceeded to eat pasta in silence because the lady I was with didn't know how to respond. On a later occasion I responded with no and that lady proceeded to tell me how awesome it is to grow up with siblings and how I missed out and when she found out later that I had lied
Starting point is 00:49:51 she got really upset and felt very guilty. How does one respond to this question while telling the truth and respecting the memory of my brother and not making shit awkward with new friends and dates? No, it's not on you. There's Sotros Papaya, Joseph. That girl who sat in silence
Starting point is 00:50:07 when you told her your brother died is a weak human. If someone tells me hey, even if we just meet and you tell me hey, do you have siblings, George? No. Just say someone died.
Starting point is 00:50:23 I was improvising this scenario. God damn it, Bobby. George? No. You're so cautious. That's not... When the scenario calls for Gilbert God damn it, you know... Don't throw your book at me.
Starting point is 00:50:39 Do it again. Yes, I have a brother and a sister. Then you say they passed away. We're just replaying this. Let me do it. I'll be the guy. Fuck you, man. You had your chance, bro. Are you enjoying your virgin mojito? Oh, very delicious. Thank you.
Starting point is 00:50:55 Even though I'm paying for it. What? Why would you throw that in there? Why would you say that? You know that I'm the man of the thing. Oh, thank you. That's so sweet of you. I'm going to pay for your mojito, too. Oh, that's so nice. My name is Bobby Lee.
Starting point is 00:51:11 My name is Bobby. Network television. Anyway, go ahead. Do you have any siblings? Yeah. Well, I did. What happened? I had a brother named Jimmy. When I was 19
Starting point is 00:51:27 and he was 14, he imploded. Oh, my God. I'm so sorry to hear that. Thanks for bringing it up. No, I'm sorry if that was a sore spot for you. It really was.
Starting point is 00:51:43 Would you want another virgin mojito? I mean, if you want to talk about it, tell me everything. We're playing basketball. And then I go, Jimmy. I go, what's up, Jimmy? And he goes, what? I just said, Jimmy.
Starting point is 00:52:01 I kept doing it. And he goes, what? I go, what? I said, what? And then all of a sudden, he just exploded. We don't know what doctors don't know. He just spontaneously combusted. And how did your family deal with it?
Starting point is 00:52:17 The brownie LMO? Thank you so much. Are you a network television? Yeah, yeah. Thank you. Did you know that his brother imploded at the basketball court? I can't be here.
Starting point is 00:52:33 Anyway, yes, we imploded. Is this a sore subject for you? Oh, no, it feels great. To think about my brother exploding in front of me. Of course, lady, it's fucking sore. I'm really sorry that happened to you. You're welcome. Hey, sorry, wrong day.
Starting point is 00:52:49 That's how you do it. Do not do it with George again now. I don't want to do it with George. I want to do it now. Ready? I'm gay. We're both gay. Or you should be friends. No, I want to be gay. I want to be gay and we met on Grindr.
Starting point is 00:53:05 Jewry words have never been spoken. Yeah, we met on Grindr. Sure. Hey. Are you enjoying your mojito? I'm loving it. Thank you so much for paying. I can't do this. I can't watch. Keep watching.
Starting point is 00:53:21 Put your head up. You're going to learn a lot of things from this. Yeah, you're welcome. You're welcome. Anyway... Do you have a brother or sister? Nope, I mean, yes. Well, I did.
Starting point is 00:53:39 What happened? There were both astronauts. And you know the challenger? Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah, the thing challenger. Well... They were watching on TV at school. And then they left and both got run over by a car.
Starting point is 00:53:55 Oh... Suck my dick. Hey, sorry to interrupt. Brownie a la cock. Yeah, thank you. No problem. Suck my dick. Jesus Christ. And scene. We have to be serious now.
Starting point is 00:54:11 Because this guy really did lose his whole brother. Yeah, this is a real thing. I'm so sorry, dude. Your brother really did. Joseph. Joseph. I think that if you're on a date with somebody and someone asks you if you have siblings, I think it's best to be transparent.
Starting point is 00:54:27 When I was 18 years old, I lost my brother and it was a really pivotal point. It was a very terrible time for my family. It's been 10 years and I miss him every day. And the girl should be able to handle that kind of information and say, you know what?
Starting point is 00:54:43 I'm really sorry to hear that. You know, siblings. Things like that. Ask him. If I were a girl, I'd ask about the brother. What were you guys like growing up? Were you guys really close? About the memories he has with his brother? That information shouldn't be
Starting point is 00:54:59 something that turns a dinner into silence. It should be something that you should... I would be so grateful to receive that kind of intimate information on the first date with somebody. I would hold that and be like, you know what?
Starting point is 00:55:15 That's... Thank you for sharing that. You're opening up to me. I would feel honored to know that about you. So I think that you should continue to tell people that you do have a brother. He's passed, but you do have a brother. Yeah, you're also not...
Starting point is 00:55:31 You're honoring him. By talking about him. By talking about him. But you do it in a way of like, I love the guy. I miss him so much. And if this girl is real at all and a cool chick, she's going to be completely like...
Starting point is 00:55:47 Number one, she's like, oh, this guy's vulnerable. Love that. Love the vulnerability. And number two, he's like an honest guy. Like, there's no... I think it's a good thing. If you lie or you make it weird, that's not cool. And I'm going to tell George
Starting point is 00:56:03 to take improv classes. He has. I'm ready to go back. Because I'm out of it. Let's take one together. New year. No, we're doing it. I'm already frightened by it. That's perfect.
Starting point is 00:56:19 The only time you expand is when you're afraid of something. That's like living at the edge of your comfort zone is where life is lived. That's the exciting part of love. I would take that George Kimmel. We'll do it. I want to start a comedy school. You should do it.
Starting point is 00:56:35 We're being real. But like a non-profit. Every time that we get is going to be through probably for animals or probably supporting the Democratic presidential nominee. Is it Cortez?
Starting point is 00:56:53 We're thinking about doing a six-week stand-up course in LA. It will be I have a feeling that it'll be people who want to take it. We're going to have submissions.
Starting point is 00:57:09 It's not going to be pretty people. It's going to be people that we think that by looking at them and seeing I guess we'll have an essay or something and reading about them we can't have everyone in it though. I'm afraid we're going to get hundreds of people.
Starting point is 00:57:25 You don't think so? Natasha, me and Mosha? No, I'm just saying that's not a bad thing. Then you have 20 people in the thing, right? Make it competitive. The next six weeks, the next time you do it even more people will try it.
Starting point is 00:57:41 But I also said we should tape each one. And maybe there's something in there. Just even a shell of us teaching this class. Oh yeah. Maybe an internet show or something. Funny could occur just by us. Man, I'm getting flashbacks of the show.
Starting point is 00:57:57 I thought I was in. I wrote my little essay. I told everybody I knew Kalyla and Steve to put in a report. Hold on a second. Are you... And then I did not get in. I'm just seeing this is going to happen again. I'm going to submit my essay. I'm going to do my best. I know Bobby. I'm going to get in.
Starting point is 00:58:13 And then it's like the first day. It's like, nope, you didn't get in. I'm going to hear my friends like oh yeah, I got in. It was great. It was so much fun. It was like the time of my life. You didn't get to go to the show show. You didn't get selected. No, I did not. I'm sorry, George.
Starting point is 00:58:29 Everybody, every guest on the Stevie Weeby show that's been on comes in. It was the most moving moment of my life. It was so... It changed me. I'm so close with everybody. What did that say about you? Bobby didn't go. My friends didn't back me up. I didn't go. I didn't go. I didn't go.
Starting point is 00:58:45 I didn't get accepted in. You got accepted. I got invited. I got one. I know. And I didn't go. I don't think I could have used yours. Any shows? Tell them. When does this come out, George? This is...
Starting point is 00:59:01 Today is... The December 5th? This is the December 5th. So I'll be at the San Diego Comedy Company. American Comedy Company in San Diego. I wish this came out today. Because the episode with Eric Griffin,
Starting point is 00:59:17 we got a facial extraction and I look really oily. And now I never want that episode to come out. It looks great now. Yeah, thanks, Jill. Anyway, I gotta get ready. Thank you. Wow. Tremendous episode.
Starting point is 00:59:33 Are we doing some house cleaning? We'll be right back. For some house cleaning. House cleaning? We'll be right back with some house clapping. Oh, and we are back. Where's leprosy from? Is it armadillo or an ant eater?
Starting point is 00:59:49 I don't even know what does that mean. The etymology or the... One of those two animals harbors the pathogen for leprosy. All I know about it is as soon as people started washing regularly, they got rid of it. It's a cleanliness thing that you didn't have back in the
Starting point is 01:00:05 Jesus times. So I'm safe. I think leprosy is... How armadillos can spread leprosy. Armadillos are the only other animals besides humans to host leprosy bacillus. Oh, it's a bacteria. So they can host it.
Starting point is 01:00:23 So they can get leprosy. Interesting. But you know how some animals are like birds? They carry a lot of like viruses, but those viruses don't affect them. It's not the case, I think, that it actually can... Who cares about fucking armadillos and leprosy?
Starting point is 01:00:39 That was nature time with coli... Who cares? Okay, what else is up, guys? This is, as Gilbert called it earlier, housekeeping. Housekeeping. George, anything we need to know? Everything's on your sheets, sir. I already typed it up earlier today and then forgot about it completely.
Starting point is 01:00:55 What sheets do we have? But guys, really, check out our Patreon. Last week's Patreon ended on a cliffhanger. Big cliffhanger. I don't even know what happened. I wasn't there and it sounded intense. It was intense? I was saying it was really very soprano's game of throny. Gilbert read the comments. May I say why it was intense?
Starting point is 01:01:11 Because I wasn't allowed to expound on my answer. I gave an answer and then all of a sudden George was like, click! He turns it off. No. Dead silence? Hawaii. I was like, what the fuck?
Starting point is 01:01:27 I'm glad I'm subscribed to the Patreon. That's what I'm trying to say. You bastard. You fucking bastard. You clicked it right before I even had a moment to talk about it. That was very game of throny and they said
Starting point is 01:01:43 very Sanza aria. Did I sound really like I was... That was a game of throne ending. I'm just sitting in Alfreda, Georgia and all my phone starts blowing up. Long ass comments. I'm like, what happened? What comments where? On the Patreon. Just long
Starting point is 01:01:59 ass comments. I was like, good god. Did they hate me? No, they don't. They're just more like clouds, right? A lot of them were like, finally. Finally. We've been waiting for this. Oh god, but you know that you know what I mean?
Starting point is 01:02:15 He's a king at the end of the day. You know what I mean? The king doesn't need my approval for the way he lives. But if you guys want to know and are interested in this discussion at all, definitely check out our Patreon. We have a lot of exclusive and
Starting point is 01:02:31 really, really more private information on there. On the private side of things, yeah. Yeah, we're a little bit freer. A little bit freer on there. We experiment with some stuff. We even did one with, we were talking to fans on a Discord. We let people sit in
Starting point is 01:02:47 on our Patreon live. I need to figure out Discord a little more. I need to figure out Discord a little more since that was the only time I ever used it. It was a test. We need to retest it. So make sure you check those episodes out by going to patreon.com
Starting point is 01:03:03 slash tigerbelly. Callila, any news from you? I just want to know if you guys are really going to come with me to the Philippines. I actually have to go. Oh, really Gilbert? Your free excuse? Did you even know what time it is?
Starting point is 01:03:19 Did you even get the dates? Let him speak, George Kimmel! Oh, you're a bad improviser! Whoa! Someone was upset about earlier's fail on the mic. I get interrupted every time! You know what? I am so proud of you for not letting him speak, actually.
Starting point is 01:03:35 That was the first time you just were like, I'm going to keep going. It was so funny, though, because it was like okay, George, do the scenario with me. Everyone knows the rule. Yes, and the first thing George says, no. But the best thing was Callila's face was like, ah, dumbass.
Starting point is 01:03:51 You're still an improv 101, you dummy. Hey, I didn't finish it. 301? That you know to agree with them for what they want. Oh, really? I don't know anything about improv. Well, you and George are taking it. That's why when you said no, I was like, ah, ah, ah, ah.
Starting point is 01:04:07 And I'm fucking, ah. What am I going to say? No. I fucking short-circuited. You agree to the scene, but not to everything that they want. Oh, okay. He was actually, yes, Andy, I was just giving him a hard time. George did advance improv.
Starting point is 01:04:23 I am too rusty, though. I am sorry. But yes. I told my grandparents because they're leaving the Philippines, I think in May. So I have to visit at some point. Before then.
Starting point is 01:04:39 It's going to be during pilot season. I can probably go at the end of April. We're not going at no end of April. Why not? That's not even in our timeline. Because the end of April is so hot as a ball sack. It's not that hot. Is it hot?
Starting point is 01:04:55 I could fry six eggs on your forehead. Is it like LA that's worse? No, it's humid, dude. Are you kidding me, Gilb? I have not been out of the country. I have no stamps on my passport. Let me give you an explanation of just how hot it is in the Philippines.
Starting point is 01:05:11 Like when you're sitting in, like if you're sitting in like a cab with somebody, right? Usually. Do your thighs adhere to the person next to you's thighs? Normally. No. Well, in the Philippines they will. If you've never had your thigh attach itself
Starting point is 01:05:27 to the thigh of the person next to you, you've never been in equatorial weather. Damn. I guess I haven't been in equatorial weather. And then you have, I have a permanent sweat mustache. As soon as I step out of the shower, I'm already sweating. I hate that feeling. It's wonderful. It's great for your circulation.
Starting point is 01:05:43 You're Filipino. I bet you anything your psoriasis will go away. Probably, right? You don't have to drive out there. You don't know. Come on. You have to give it a shot. When are you trying to go? Maybe like late Feb. We were going to do a podcast out there.
Starting point is 01:05:59 We were going to try to shoot something out there. You know, like a fish out of water show for a bobo. Maybe you and bobo. I love how your voice is getting higher. I'm trying to sell this to you. I'm sold. Yeah, right. But you have to come back. We're going to do our own pilot, basically.
Starting point is 01:06:15 You're not going to be in our pilot season? As long as I get to improvise with George. That's all it matters. That's all I want. Yeah, I think that it'll be fun. We can still record out there. We can meet our two fans from the Philippines. No, we have a bunch.
Starting point is 01:06:31 I look at the lips and numbers. Oh, yeah? Okay, sweet, sweet. It's probably just my cousins. All my family members. This is Jules. Yeah, podcasting is not a very big thing there yet. It hasn't quite like... I feel like we should have our own variety show.
Starting point is 01:06:47 Who says it's not in the works? Who says we haven't already rehearsed and perfected one? Check out the Patreon. I won't be dancing. But someone will. I might be dancing. She might. I'm Filipino. It might be in my blood.
Starting point is 01:07:07 Where can we follow you? You can follow me on all forms of social media. Even though I'm not really on... I don't do Snapchat. Does anyone still do Snapchat? I stopped. IG story kind of took the place of that. Calamity K.
Starting point is 01:07:23 Let me spell this right. K-H-A-L-I... See? You fucked me up because you were mousing it. Sleek? K-H-A-L-A-M-I-T-Y... K. Did you spell that right? I don't know. And then George, where can they follow you?
Starting point is 01:07:41 Where can all the hot chicks... Oh, I just want to give a shout out to Ki-Won Lee. I think it's Kiwi Lee. Let me find it real quick. Have you hooked up with a fan? Ever? Hooked up, made out with... I'm not talking about taking them on a date.
Starting point is 01:07:57 Back in the early days of Tiger Belly. That was like... No, when I first... It was when I quit my job. Right when the week that I quit, I went to a Mangchi show. We had fans then? Yeah. I thought we were just doing it to ourselves.
Starting point is 01:08:13 That was the only time I ever met her. I thought we were talking to ourselves for the first two years. An echo chamber. Just us. Instagram. Kiwi underscore Lee. That's my shout out. K-I-W-I underscore L-E-E-E. E.
Starting point is 01:08:29 Nice. You look nice, baby. You look like a sushi chef. My shout out is to a poon poon from Atlanta, Georgia. Shout out to you. Thank you for buying our merch. So guys, that's our show. Follow us on Instagram at Tiger Belly
Starting point is 01:08:45 on the Twitter at TheTigerBelly. Email us any questions, like, unhelpful advice or concerns at thetigerbellyatgmail.com. I don't know. Oh my gosh. Jorz just struck Bobby Lee. Don't... Not the head, babe. You can touch any part of his body.
Starting point is 01:09:01 Oh, you hit him in his nuts, Jorz? You sacked half Bobby Lee. Babe, come here. Are you okay, babe? Come here. Come here, babe. You okay? This is the last episode you guys will... Don't touch him! Guys, George Kimmel.
Starting point is 01:09:17 UCB Advanced Improv 401. Check it out. That's our show. Enjoy the rest of your week, your evening. On the kitchen counter! Okay, this is the craziest ending ever. Bye! Bye!
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