TigerBelly - Episode 179: The Tooth Connection

Episode Date: January 30, 2019

Bobo is dadcore. George is Kush. Gilb is Kellyanne. We talk hyenas, a friendship with Orlando, and John Athpinktor (the nobody.)Watch Bobby on ABC's Splitting up Together TUESDAYS 9:30|8:30cBonus content every Monday:https://www.patreon.com/TigerBellySupport us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You're listening ad-free on Wondery plus Yeah, raise the rift do they observe fire there bro. There's a fire on my pants brah Oh, I think that's her piece. That's her piece brah Like artists and see Bobby knows who they are. No, I want to talk about that too I want to talk about cuz you said something that offended me yesterday, but I want to bring that up too You said up into a point. I'm not hip like I don't I don't absorb I didn't absorb there's a certain date and then I stopped absorbing what's relevant. That is fighting So let's go let's go five four three two one last stop

Welcome to another episode of tiger belly guys. Um We don't have a guest. This is the first solo. We've done in a very very long time and it's only almost feels um Like we're all alone and cuz I when I walked into this room. I didn't really know what to say to you guys I looked at George. I'm like, uh, I Looked at Gilbert. I was like pass. I looked at Kalei Lysik Lyle. What you were dismissed I'd rather No, no, no, I'll cut out. Oh, no, no, let's let me reiterate. George is really cocky. Yeah, you're really cocky right now When I walked in here, I go I look I said looked at George and I went

Like that and I looked at Gilbert and it was like I think I just got the residual of you fuck you when I look at George Fuck you George. So oh, I'm so mean to you George. You said you work so hard for us. He does I feel so bad I feel like that's another thing. We truly need to address. You're our Jerry Kushner You are like you don't belong but you do Like you have access you have access to the Oval Office, but you shouldn't Weird voice you're like always surprised. Yeah, that's that's what he sounds like. Yeah So, um, I shouldn't be if this was that uh, the if I was the president and when a name of course Kalei Lyle would be Melania

and then You you Gilbert would be um You would be who else you would you be you would be Kelly and Conway Kelly and Conway for sure Yeah, that's 100% you're Kelly uncle. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, Bobby and George. You're a Kushner I feel like you could spin anything. Yeah, you could spin anything. Listen guys, um, I wasn't able to talk about this, but You know, you know They talk about twins, right? Like a twin gets diarrhea. Let's see a twin lives in Boston, Massachusetts We're doing a science alert, right? Yeah, it's science. Definitely science science

Which is also referenced on the haunting of Hill House remember the twin Wow, yeah, wait, I think I beat him Wow If I suck the dick This is exactly if I was forced I was in prison and there was a black dick in front of me Okay, and I had to suck it. Yeah, this is exactly my face. It was good. This is my face would be like this Do it I don't want to do it. I'll be like Stop making sound stop making

Right that would that be me. What would you do would you teeth it be real though, but be real about it. Yo, man suck it Okay, but I use only teeth Chomp chomp, that's what you would do. I go chomp chomp. No, you wouldn't use your teeth that you get hurt I just do it man. All right. It's already humiliating enough Anyway, X you and make you fucking bite the conch. Yeah Let me say something though. So um, so twins right if ones that lives in Boston the other one lives in Jerusalem Or wherever anywhere else kick Morocco Morocco, Morocco, fine. Let's go with Morocco, right and and one of the twin like he stomach hurts

Yeah, it has a little bit dealer diarrhea. Okay, the other one his stomach hurts to from Morocco Okay, so they have a connection that way my brother and I have the same connection like a telepath and I never told you about this, okay? So when my brother and I were in Phoenix, I Swear to God this happened. I Lie a lot Okay, that's one of my character defects. I Exaggerate what did what the fucking say what it was here that said that thing? Oh, yeah, Michael Bisbee What do you say Chinese proverb Chinese chong-chong go? What do you say?

He's cheeky bastard. What this guy Don't let the truth get in the way of a good story Gilbert say it cuz he forgot it. He didn't remember. I didn't remember What did Michael Bisbee say? He's cheeky bastard. I'm talking cheeky bastard. So funny But this is the truth. Okay, so I was so my parents house They live in they live in a place called Gilbert, Arizona I'm not gonna give you the street name. I thought you would stalk them, but they live in a two-story brown standard track home

More details about the house That is not a track home, sweetie. I don't know what a track home is. What's a track home? What is a track home? A track home is a as a neighborhood of houses. They all look exactly the same. Okay, really? That's a track home is look it up. I'm pretty sure that's what it is. That's like your average. What is it like? Yeah, track housing TRACT. I know like the same they all look the same multiple somewhere homes that are built on a track of land Yeah, yeah, so they live in it all of Arizona then that's what I'm saying Okay, so live in a track home. All the houses look the same. Oh, you're right. Their house their house is abnormally hot

Like my dad can't sleep if he sees feels any cold. So it's at 90 degrees that the the heater Geez, so I had to cover the vents with like Duck tape. I went to Walgreens. I got duck tape at the leave the window. Oh, it's it's a whole fucking thing Okay, and my brother is in the room next to me. Okay, and he for some reason his room is just The air is quality is very good So I'm sweating. I'm sweating on my bed. It's five in the morning and I'm sleeping and I wake up. I open my eyes and I sit to myself. I Was in a subconscious thought I

Went into my subconscious, and I started thinking about my own brain. I don't know it was weird I just started going crazy What images were you saying? It wasn't an image. It was just thinking about my subconscious I can't even really describe it, but I was Putting my hand over my head like this I was going no, no like that. You just half asleep. Maybe you were like stuck in like I was a stuck in a dream state Or I was going no, no, I was on the edge of the bed. I was sweating And I was going losing my mind and I had a pace, right?

And you and I looked at my clock. It was like 5 30 in the morning and then eventually I Layed down and I went back to sleep. I woke up at like four in the afternoon Exactly when my brother woke up and I look at my brother and my brother's eyes it looked like he had been crying Steve He goes Bob. I go what he goes 5 30 the morning. I woke up and my tooth my tooth is dying

Like what happened? He goes I have toothache at 5 30 in the morning in his room He was going through the same thing, but he had a toothache Whoa, that's like a fucking Connection bro, and it wasn't he like praying on his knees. He was praying I was praying he was praying on his knees to the same time at the same time. We were praying So what is that coincidence? I think not you guys aren't twins What you guys aren't twins. Yeah, but still we're close. Okay, what what even that stuff don't challenge me fuck No, but you used an example of twids in Morocco in Boston. I know you said shit to your side

But you're challenging me you fuck. I'm asking don't don't do that. Okay, you're right. Yeah, we're not twins But because maybe deeply yeah, like you and your sister deeply connected right finish each other's thoughts sentences everything Yeah, right, so I think my brother and Steve and I have the same thing and while he was going through his massive toothache right and then so we get him a dentist, right and Then he texts me what the day I guess they photographed his mouth. I have the photo on my phone, right? He went I literally I thought it was from National Geographic. I want to say it was the mouth of a hyena That's what it looked like just the one tooth or no I mean all of though is that he texted me at when he had a toothache and he's like

Kalei, you know, can you please make me a dentist appointment? So it's like of course So I said Steve as soon as you get home I'll make you a dentist appointment and he was like no no it has to be after this date Right, so he had to he waited like two weeks till after his show performed Yeah, with a massive toothache. No, but what he did though was this is When he which he fucked up because when he went to the dentist They looked in his mouth and they go we got a yank two teeth He's like why?

Because the nerves are dead So he gets to the point where it passed the pain Oh, he goes to the pain of the root. It's infected. It's infected now He has to be on antibiotics because it's all like mold and whatever it might be Like mold whatever we don't even know it's a mystery But it's like he's never flossed He dips he dips any brushes. I don't know when I because I don't in fact I've never seen him brushes teeth

No, Ilani says he does now and he flosses now. I'm just saying I've known him for 40s four years I don't really I don't have a memory of him ever brushing his teeth But even as kids together, I'm trying to think right now It's like went like I don't even remember like because him and I had the same bathroom Yeah, you know up there what you you weren't a good older brother. You didn't teach him properly. I don't give a fuck about his teeth Fuck his teeth, right? I Don't even remember going to the bathroom brushing my own teeth and looking at my brother's toothbrush and going Oh, I don't want to mix toothbrushes never that ever happens. Yeah, I only was only one toothbrush you yeah

And I would touch it. It was always dry when I used it. So you never used it Damn, I don't remember him ever brushing his teeth like that fucking high, you know Not crazy Yeah, and my brother um, he just has his thing He just has he just doesn't because even that week and I'm like as soon as we get in town I'll make an appointment. He's like no He can he'll just go through the pain of it. Are they crazy? You know bad two-takes. All right, do they hurt real bad. He was praying on his knees. It's yeah, dude tears in his eyes

Oh my god, I know So now he just has no teeth. They're just gone. Well, they haven't pulled them out Yeah, we have to pay for that procedure. We have to pay for that procedure tiger belly is Yeah, so we're gonna take a little hit donate donation. No, no, no We got we got some money saved for my brother's teeth. Go fund me What teeth fun for fun for my brother? Well add to our patreon locals. Yeah, yeah, because a teeth fun me a teeth fun I can't even I honestly like I I I love him so much that I

Just I He's like having a son though It's like having a child You know, I've you know If he's hungry, I need to feed him, you know, if he's a lot you can't afford something. I had to get it You know, he's just gonna be a part of You know my like in my mind Everything that I have is a he's a part of that whole if I make money

It's like it's like he's a part of that whole thing, you know, which is I think is that Korean or am I just a good dude? I love the choice Culture or is it is up my heart your core. Do you feel like maybe you've stunted him in a way? Oh, yeah, for sure I've enabled him to the point where he doesn't have to do anything. What do you think if you didn't do? But here's the thing though. I think it's Korean because the oldest son in Korean culture is The responsible one. So I wasn't responsible in the way That maybe normal older brothers were you know, like in terms of like you gotta do your homework or yeah

They show up on time to your job, but I'm a fixer You know, I can't see well, let's go to the hospital That happened once I told you that already make me Korean cuz I take care of the both of you. Yeah. Yeah, you're very clear Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah that way my brother called me one day. Yeah, how long ago was this? I never said this This is a big thing. I don't remember. He calls me one day. I go. What's up? He goes Bob Yeah, he goes I Can't see Go you can't see I

Can't see I mean when somebody your brother calls you to say something like that The panic I go to his house. He had clouds in his eyes or something He had cataracts. Yeah So we had to go to a fucking eye surgeon guy and and they had it like zap his eyes, you know, but it was like weird What's so funny? It's just the calls that you get are so like terrified I know you just don't get cataracts overnight like your vision slowly starts to go. I don't even know a lot of sun exposure Some people are more prone to them, but yeah, he's been not seeing for a while. I think that was just a point where it really Waits till he wakes to the very end. Yeah, like he'll wait before like

If this happened if his asshole fell out Prolapse. Yeah, or like, you know, he's like one of those guys where it's like a pop my asshole fell out That's what can't see and you're like, what happened? I don't know sleeping. I woke up. I look on the ground I thought it was a coin Right, I picked it up. Well, you know or calamari. I thought it was like a piece of calamari. I picked it up It's my anus We gotta get sold You know put it in the freezer. I'd probably say you put the asshole in the freezer

I'd rush over put it in the plastic bag, right? We would go to the hospital and I'd be like to the doctor Can you sell this back on? What is it? Is it calamari the doctor is asking? No, it's my brother's anus and then you have to sell it back on. Oh, yeah, like that's my brother takes it to that point But I love him, you know, yeah, what are you gonna do? You know But um, you said something to me the other day that really offended me babe. Oh Gosh, and she goes because you know, she goes, you know, you think you're hip and cool Thank you so much. All right, let's say this is a court of law. You're the judge. Okay, Gilbert Bobby Lee Yes, so she says and she goes, you know, you just you're not hip because at a certain date in your life

You decided to not absorb what's relevant and cool. Yeah, he's circa 98 forever Circa 98 and anything after that, right? You know, but what she doesn't seem to understand is she's wrong It's the reason I brought it up is because my job as Your lover and confidant and someone who cares deeply about you is to bring you back to earth You were going on a very nice narcissistic tirade about how cool you were And so I was like, I don't I've got to put a stop to this Would you like to? Well, I have to say this. Okay. I mean like he was what pacing around the room name-dropping

After every five seconds, he'd be like, I'm pretty cool. Huh, babe No, I was like I was playing Scrabble and I was like I had to put a stop to this. This is where it is The other day I was with her mom, okay, right and we were in what's Highland Park Highland Park great place and we went to Donut friend We went to this dumpling place cross joy. It was just a saturation of People that wanted it either meet me how saturation to people, babe and those eight The fucking guy that owned the fucking store the the dumpling place

When am I not right? Yeah, the owner of the fucking dumpling that's one one other lady. He was like, are you working yet? No, the people at donut friend. So that's fine. Right. Yeah, come on. Let's be real But can I just say with what he did? When these things happen, yeah, he's looking for me Yeah, when people are like trying to take pictures with him Yeah, he's trying to scan the room to see if I'm looking. Yeah, I need her to be looking He wants me to be impressed. No, no, no, that's what I know it bothers her I want the wing the way so when she looks at me. I want to wink at her. Yeah to show her how cool

I am so what do you do in this situation? Are you just avoiding eye contact? Yeah, she completely doesn't look at me. I run away. She runs away. I go like because I just know what's coming I know he's gonna tell me he's gonna be and in my mom always is She's kind of you know, yeah, like wow Bobby. They really love you He loves her very supportive like She like yes and the shit Yeah, I love her and I'm already in the car. She's the best. She's the best. Yeah. Yeah, you're famous I don't do but listen fuckers. I

Don't do it, right for my ego. I do it because it's funny, right? I get it once. No, you don't look at me Gilbert All right, it's just literally no hear me out. I started copying what you do to people It's fun, right? Cuz I'll look at so when somebody like as can I get a photo? Then I'll look at my girlfriend and go like that and it bothers her. I do it for a laugh I don't do it there for anything else. I don't give a fuck Right, I don't give a fuck people like this podcast. I do it for them, right? We're family You know, I've never turned down a photo, you know, you like that about yeah. Yeah, I'm always cool about it So, you know, but anyway, she says that I'm not you know, but here's the thing though. Okay

She doesn't realize that at every night I scroll through right a Thousand bands on band camp even even people that aren't signed, you know, oh the indie stuff Yeah, and I try to listen to find something that's like Interesting or what somebody like I'm really into like there's a little subdivision on band tam home recordings So people like just writing music in their bedroom as I think it's called bedroom recordings is the that's cool offshoot, you know there's different like little subgenres like um, um Dark ambient I was getting into right or drone drone

And in band camp, how many times do you have to listen to it to before you have to pay? Stuff like that What how many times can you listen to it before you have to start to pay I Think like ten times or something. So then one day one day. I was listening to this one guy This dude from Canada that he's not on itunes or anything if what I'll do is I'll find somebody on band camp And then I'll go to itunes because I have that thing where I can just listen to you know, whatever I want But sometimes they don't have they're just only on band camp So then I'll go to their then I'll have them get their email and I have to do some sort of PayPal thing

Yeah, and then I'll send them money like $10 15. That's cool. Can I give my side now? I go ahead Yes, so as he was pacing around the room basically sucking his own cock. Oh, okay. I I had to tell him that you know, he's not as cool as he thinks and The reason that I said that is because he was like Really really really really really and I mean by I mean sucking his dick like he was really sucking his dick that day So I was like you don't even know like I can't share certain joys with him Like he doesn't understand memes. He doesn't understand like the meme structure how they work why they're funny. I do I Do I can I just say this? I'm sorry you're done with your testimony. I'm not yet. Okay, defend it

Let the defendant and I can't like I like I can't share certain joys of like Irony with him. Like I don't he doesn't know anything between 1998 and today Like it doesn't know anything about mainstream anything so I can't joke He doesn't get like references about what I think are funny about like it late 90s stuff for early 2000 because I think that he Just checked out of the pop culture from that date So like even about like the fire festival when I was trying to explain why it was so funny That when it when it did happen. He had never heard of it before

He's just so He's very very in touch with a lot of things that are very cool and obscure would very out of touch with like more mainstream stuff That's I've always been like that though Okay, like today in the car. I asked we drove by a photo of a poster of Ariana Grande. Mm-hmm. Okay. Yeah now Because of my obsession with the voice and auditioning shows singing talent. I'm beginning to like now I have on my iPad

Playlists that I've made and one of them is called cheese So anything cheesy that I think is cheesy and I have all that shit Beyonce. I have More I carry I have Whitney. I have all that shit because growing up. I just didn't care about people who could sing good I cared about more like You know street, you know, like the velvet underground like kind of street, you know Art art rock pretty much like the talking head, you know things are a little weird, you know So but now so we're driving by and I'm like, how did she just get discovered asked her? Yeah She's a Disney girl whatever because she was married to Pete Davidson because I know Pete yeah engaged

So what tell me what happened? So I'm I'm asking cuz I want to get educated. Yeah, I could just look at that poster and go fuck her Yeah, I don't want to know this. I don't give a fuck about her. Yeah, I mean She's wearing a little fucking bunny rabbit thing with the ears that you know that woman mask, you know, but I'm interested Who is that? You know, tell me about Beyonce. Yeah, I ask Beyonce. That's how you beyond. Yeah, is that what's her name? It's Beyonce, but you've been saying yeah, but you know what when I said Beyonce I said that's what I thought her name was for like nine years Since you've been correcting me I at night I lay in bed and I go You practice I try to reprogram my mind

So that I know that it's Beyonce Instead of Beyonce, okay, and so when I was came back from Coachella, I was like babe Destiny's child was there. She brought out Kelly and Michelle and he was he's just like Who the fuck are they? Kelly, Michelle Obama? Who the fuck? You brought the bomb? I don't bet why would I care though, right? It's like it's just like not knowing who Michael Jordan is, you know Like they're so massive, right? Like but here I'll give you can I just are I I'm still in court. Yes. Yes I'm gonna give you another Example of why what so how I'm gonna define myself here. So basically

If I sometimes I go to an American In American citizen, yeah, and they're wearing an LA Rams jersey And they'll go they'll go We're in the Super Bowl. Yeah. Oh Interesting So, you know our tight end. He's really killing it. Oh I'm sure he is. I try to get involved Right?

They pass interference on that double back Whatever they say, you know, I mean, yeah, you see track back and the passenger friends was like the rookie the the rookie of the year Be honest beyond beyond beyond save the save the day. He's the play. Yeah in the fourth quarter Half-time half-time. They had a talk and I'll listen to all that. I'll go. Yes. Yeah, right. I try to be open to it Yeah, but if I then go a Hey, you know Eric Cantona, wow, he was great, right? Mm-hmm, and they were like Who's Eric Cantona? Oh one of the greatest French soccer players of the history of the world Very more people know him

Then what the fuck you're stupid ramps than you're talking about They don't know but I don't judge them from not knowing because they just don't know Yeah, right, but they should but in my mind, they should but they don't so my point is you can't know everything Colada rebuttal you can't know everything of course not but as a comedian as somebody who's supposed to be a To have a running commentary on all things pop culture politics I think that you should be on the up-and-up about certain things like like Who Cardi B is?

So my act would be at Cardi B. Wow Bottom she was wearing at that disco jet At the disco jet was like so in fashion. What's up, right? What do you want me to do? I just I think that it's a good jet. I don't know. I'm just making it up I think that this is social responsibility for you as like I don't I don't have to at least know Sir a little thing a little about everything. He's standing everyone and I'm not doing that. I love you And this is a very I'm being having a very happy I'm having a very happy debate with you, and I'm not I'm not gonna start if I love you so much

Okay, and you're doing your your points are so good and my points are good We're just having a like an I'm just tired of you saying raise the roof and I'd like That's the core. That's the core. I'm sitting back down now. Let's go. Okay Okay, so I find you to just be super like dad core. Yeah, I'm dad core for sure Yeah, okay, but I'm gonna say this though is that It's funny That you say things of this nature and with this type of energy that you're bringing to the table mmm because Our podcast is gaining followers

not losing Up hill why is that? Because the people and no no because people listening they get it They get it they get everyone the chemistry everything, right? So, you know, I'm not gonna change I'm not gonna change because I'm a dad core for sure. I think I also have just one more gripe. Oh god. Here we go. Get it up I am just sick and tired of your fucking playlist. It's just all my gosh Sad emo rich boys with fucking three chords on a guitar It's always talking about being in a room and it's all the same. They all sound the same and it's always just white

Sad rich boys singing. I'll tell you why defend it. Can I tell you why defend it? Please? Thank you. Thank you so much All you relate to I'm an upper middle-class white boy Because I was raised in you know an area where it was just a bunch of white kids fair points and When I graduated from high school, I I moved to La Jolla and I liked Some punk like I liked math rock and the two bands. I really liked with the number one band I liked was a band called drive like Jehu who I like that doughnut shop The doughnut shop that we ate at yesterday one of the guys from drive like Jehu, right owns it

Right and I bought a shirt that was like a drive like Jehu Shirt yank crime, but it was a doughnut friend, you know, they kind of Combined to the two so I bought the shirt. My point is is this so I in the early 90s Because it was nirvana and you know that Seattle thing was happening San Diego had a really good music scene and we had rocket from the Crypt and all these bands I used to go to the Kaz by should you know, I had orange hair and I would go to the vintage clothing store and get You know dickies and Combat boots. I find that genre of music to be amazing and I grew up on that too

But then there was another thing that happened was I got really depressed And I discovered a band and if you and anyone want to know what I'm talking about and you're gonna hate it But it's I love sad core It's a it's a style of music It's depressing and the king of sad board band sad core bands is one of my favorite bands of all times Which is the Red House painters? From San Francisco a guy named Mark Kozalik was the lead singer He then it was in a band called Sun Kill Moon. I like Sun Kill Moon and he did his own solo stuff and

Mark Kozalik I I've seen you perform a bunch of times and you got me through a really hard time, dude I really related to his sad white boy point of view I about love loss and about how being insecure about his body He would sing about like I feel a theory about my body and I want to you know kill myself kind of a vibe And I know you're because you're a pretty Filipino girl like a little flower I was always a meek sad little fucker. Look, it's fine that you listen to Red House painters Yeah, it's not fine that you listen to 500 different bands like Red House painters. Yes, it is goddamn day And can I say this too? If you want to listen to Red House painters, they're great Sun Kill Moon. No, no, no the Red House painters Listen to the roller coaster album

All right, it's the roller coaster album Start from beginning to end if you like that then go into the other ones too, but I love the Red House painters Okay, and yes, you're right. I in my band camp. There are things like sad core or slow core you know, sometimes I get into some Shoe gazing kind of stuff. I like shoe gaze like I love my bloody Valentine I love my bloody but yes, I have an obsession with really sad white Music that's very entitled sounding. It's okay. That's I think that's my problem with it because this I'll hear a song about like You know why his parents didn't like buy him his brand-new pair of shoes. You know what I mean? There's never a song

Is this true is this true fact check It's like it's so sad core, but the lyrics are so like shallowed. I'm like, that's what you're crying about He sings about he sings about how he sings about how you know, who's he Marcos like oh, I'm not referring to red house I'm referring to some of the other stuff you listen to where I'm like, holy shit. That's a fucking first world problem, bro And I'm full of first world problems You know, that's the part of being in a modern age is that you And and the and the key is to shake yourself out of it To be more connected to the world and to know what's going on, you know with people's lives and you know

You know, but you know at the end of the day, right? They always say Nobody or what you have in your life, right? Exterior things like a career or money or whatnot, right isn't gonna fix you, you know, it's an inside job It's no matter where I'm at in the world. I'm going to be there with me with my issues So I carried around like luggage. So no matter what happens in my life I will always until unless I deal with it. Okay, so I get it I have first world problems and I bitch about things that I shouldn't bitch about like, oh my god, the yoga shops close

I I've said that before and it's like a I've looked at her and go you told me it was open. Oh, you know how Yeah, because you could you went to a map question. You said it was Mapquests or whatever not map what's the other one Google Maps Google Maps ways yeah, and then she's like, I don't know It just said it's open. It's not I go with the what are we gonna eat now? And I've done that and I admit to it, you know, but you know I'm a bitch. I Think you should write your own sad core song about first world problems. That would be cool

And that's why that would be I really love you do we should fucking Europe now You're being positive, right and you're getting your you give me a creative outlet. You could you could write songs about like the yoga Why is there lint on my beanie? Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I do a whole song about why like You're you're really just you're you're trying to get to me right now. All right, you get out of the skin I live with you. I know what you cry about. I'll tell you what I've been I'll tell you the first ones that I complain about And this is gonna be so embarrassing. Let's do it. I'm gonna do it. Okay. I've complained about Um

That definitely food definitely like I can see that, you know after the comedy store, you know Like the other night for him and war, you know for him. Yeah, he goes, um Let's get some to eat I go well, there's not a lot of things open I go throw me some options He goes he threw me like he didn't know that many places. That's open late. So you want ramen. He's like, yeah So we went to jujitsu jujitsu the sujita the dip and Robin, right? And we sat there and I go Can we get I'll get a ramen and then for him goes, is there pork in here? It's all pork even the broth everything it's pure fat pork right right and I go Yeah

He's like I can't eat pork I go why Because, um, Muslim. What? How's that a rule? Doesn't make any sense. Eat it. What did he say? He said, no, I can't eat it. I've never eaten it. You can eat it now. You can eat it now. Because I'm not eating it. I go, yeah, you are. Because they don't have anything else but that. They do. Sujita has a vegetarian ramen. Right, so he got that, right? And they have a chicken one, too. The dandan. No, there was no dandan. Dandan chicken? There was no dandan. Dandan chicken noodle they do. I don't even know what I'm getting into right now. What's my point? So you're telling, you're forcing a Muslim to eat pork, so that's what we're at. Oh, yes. Spin it around, Bobby. Spin it around. Spin it around. What's the lesson? What's the lesson? I forgot. There's no lesson. I went into a story that made no sense at all. I don't know why I said that. He was like, eat the pork. Eat the pork. And then he wouldn't eat it. And then I spent like an hour. Why you're angry about food? Yeah. Why won't you eat the fuck it's good, the dip in ramen, right? But it's like my, I don't know. Is that making any sense? Probably not.

Write a song about it, babe. I'm going to write a song about it. Sukumen. The Sukumen song. No, that's not a good first world problem. That's me not knowing what religion. Why won't these Muslims eat pork? They should eat pork. What's another first world problem? I don't know. How often do you get mad at your phone about stuff? I don't get mad at my phone about anything. What's another one, babe? Is this food, really? That complaint about? No, tell me another one. Be real. Be real. We're in the court of law. Be real. Are you sure? Like, are you sure? Is the lint one a joke? Yeah, yeah. Try it. And then if you throw something out, I don't want it out there, then we'll just cut it out. Are you sure? Make strong eye contact. Do it. Do it. Do it. So you know. Do one. Do one. One of the things that I don't like particularly about the way you act is. Oh, here we go. Oh, wait. Hold on. I shouldn't do better. No, no, no. You try. Okay. Oh, we love Adam and Eve. But seriously, Clara, back to the first world problems. Bobby thinks that certain people should be treated better than certain people. Uh-oh. Spaghetti. Uh-oh. Spaghetti.

We're not going to talk about it. You can always defend yourself, but you said to be honest. Yeah, but you're the way you said it. Okay. What you just said, right? Oh, God. It sounds bad the way you said it. Okay, well, hold on. I'll try to make it nice. I can try to justify what I'm saying. Okay. Let me finish then. No, my point is this. Wait, hold on. I haven't said anything. All right, go, go, go. When we're in a restaurant and he doesn't get special treatment. No, that never happened. No, my point is this. Like if he has to wait like the other people. No, no, no, no, no. Babe, come on. Let's be honest the hour. It's not honesty at all. It's not honesty at all. Oh, another thing that I want to say. Okay, well, we'll depart for that. I'll let me go to my thing though. No, another thing. There's another thing I really don't like. Why can I defend the other?

One time, so lately he's been saying, I really need to get help. I really need to see a therapist. I need to go to a retreat. I was like, yes, yes, yes, all of the above. I support you. And whatnot. He was like, I want to go to this particular Institute. And I'm like, yes, I'll sign you up. You know, let me, whatever I need to do for the papers, right? And then I'm like, whoa, he's really into this. And then he was like, do you know that Orlando Bloom and Katy Perry have been there? Also, Justin Bieber is supposed to be headed there. So, yeah, that's, oh, that's why I want to go. And so I've, I thought about this. And I think that your king, even though he doesn't want to admit he wants to be the everyday man, he doesn't want to rub, you know, he doesn't want to Hollywood schmooze. There's a part of him that's a very Hollywood schmoozy. And he wants, he wants to be in that club. He wants to like just casually like be friends with Justin Bieber.

Don't know why, but he does. Defended. Did you not want me to mention that? That's fine. I'm going to try to defend myself. And when his manager, Abby, was like, this shit's expensive. Why would the fuck would you pay for this place? You know, blah, blah, blah. And he was like, go to Orlando Bloom, go there. True or false, Bobby. True or false. Now it never happened. Objection? Objection. Objection. Objection. Objection. Objection. Facts not enough. Okay. Here's, here's the deal. Here's the deal, guys. Slepkin's talking now. Real. Okay. And I will admit to, I will admit to some things that I'm not, I'm not proud of. Okay. Now, sometimes when I'm at the comedy store and John Mayer says hello to me. Yeah. It feels good. That's cool. Yeah. It's cool. Like, fuck, John Mayer just gave me a hug. Yeah. Right.

You know, Chappelle the other day, what took a selfie with me. Let's take a photo. Yeah. I felt good. Yeah. Does that feel, does that feel different than when like a fan wants to take a photo? It feels a little different. With you? Yeah. If somebody, some random guy, like a valet. Yeah. Let's take a photo. I want to. Yeah. Whatever. I don't see no. Yeah. I take a photo. Chappelle asks for a photo. I take a photo. Yeah. Are those two the same? They feel different to me. I don't know where you're getting at. My point is, is this, is that with, here's my, and we might have to take this whole thing out. But when I'm saying, Hey, I believe in you. You got this. Here's what I want to say. You got this. You know, what, I've had arguments with Khalil about how some people are more important to other people and this and that. Right. So for instance, I don't believe she doesn't believe that. So it's going to sound terrible.

But, you know, if a man, if they found, you know, if they found, they found a man, a regular man in Antarctica. Okay. He was in a block of ice. He was frozen. Right. Hold me. Right. And they saw, they saw him. Yeah. They saw him. I'm with your body. Come on, buddy. They saw him and they go, who is this guy? And they go, his name is John Smith. Yeah. What does he do? Pocahontas husband. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. John Atherington. John Atherington. Atherington. Yeah. Yeah. How do you spell that? And they go, who's he? He was just, you know, he was a coal miner from the 1800s. Sure. He was frozen. Yeah.

Is that different than finding a frozen body of Tom Hanks? Yeah. So what's more important? I would say in the history of time, in the history of the world, in terms of like what people care about, is it more interesting that it was just a coal miner who slipped and fell, or if it was like Steve McQueen? Yeah. I'll say, I'll say it is more interesting. Right. It's more and also more people would be bummed about it. More people would be bummed about Steve McQueen. Oh my God. That's worse. Let's say Steve McQueen had disappeared. Yeah. Right. On the face of this planet, one of the biggest actors of the early 70s. Right. And then they found his frozen body or some random guy, comparatively speaking.

John Atherington. Steve, as John Atherington, Steve McQueen would be more of a thing. It's more important. But that's not what I was saying. I don't understand. So that was, we've had arguments like that before. I have a question. I'm just telling you. I have a question for you then. I have a question. Why every new restaurant that we go to, if the owner or someone in that place doesn't know who you are, it automatically, the dumplings aren't good. Like yesterday. I'm not done. I'm not done. I'm gonna pee. I'm gonna pee. I'm gonna pee. Can you hear me though? I can't hear you right now. Okay. I'll tell you guys. I'll tell you guys. Yesterday. Yesterday we ordered a bunch of dumplings and he was like,

yeah, they're all right. Are they good? Are they good? And all of a sudden he later on the owner strolls in and then he takes a picture with Bobby and then Bobby sits back down. He was like, oh my God, these dumplings are so good. I also said everything tastes good to him. And he, I don't understand that. How, why, why does, maybe life tastes better when you're acknowledged. Maybe I'll, maybe that's it. Well, I guess you could say in a restaurant setting, I guess it's part of the ambiance. So you're like including all the senses of like, oh, it was nice customer service. It was knowledge. Here's the deal. Here's the deal. Okay. Defend it. You're back. I'm back. Thank you.

What you're saying to me right now has run true. And I'm getting, I'm being able to see myself, right? You know, light, that's ugly. It's an ugly light. I think it's cute. No, it's an ugly light. And it makes me seem despicable. No, it does. And in, in the light of the evidence shown before me, it's either run, hide or face it. Those are my options. Those are three options. Yeah. I'm going to face it. Say congratulations. Congratulations. Thank you. Okay. So from this day forth,

wait, get your fucking smile off your face, George. I fucking swear to God, I'll gouge your eyes out. I will gouge your fucking eyes out through the glass. Thank you. From this day forward, I am a changed man. Okay. The dumplings are going to be good as is. Do you hear what I'm saying? Yes. If the dumplings are fresh, what do you smile at your flat face? I'm just thinking about these dumplings. I know. I'm just thinking about it. If the dumplings are fresh, I'm going to enjoy it. Okay.

A lot of my little things about what I'm saying and the things that I believe in or not believe in are just to cause a reaction to people. To who? To you. To, you know, it's fun to fuck around. I will say that all these things that I've mentioned about you, I think that you think that they're all defects. It's actually the reasons why I'm in love with you. I find you to be so... I mean, you have this guy on the fucking... ...amusingly narcissistic. I mean, it is part of his charm because after when he does that, I confront him about it and we cry laugh about it. About what a classist he is. It's so... I love all those parts about you. So I don't want you to change.

The drone music. Okay. Okay. So I think we lost followers. I really do believe. Why? Because I'm a piece of shit. It just makes me look so weird. I think that's why people love you because you're a bunch of followers. And I'm going to be a different man. I'm going to travel the earth. Don't be boring. Yeah, I mean, with just a fucking pillowcase.

A little stick pillowcase and a book and a journal and a couple pieces of underwear. All right. And I'm going to move on with my life. I'll be that. Okay. I've been also obsessed with Neil Breen lately. Again? Yeah. I know, but I'm re-obsessed with Neil Breen. He's the one who did fateful findings. Everyone watching that.

Everyone watching. Just go to YouTube. All right. It's one of the worst movies ever made. You think that the room is bad. You think that... What's his name? What's his guy's name? Oh, Tommy Wiseau. Tommy Wiseau. You think that he's the worst. I think Neil Breen is the next level. Fightful.

And there's a scene. Look up the suicide scene. It is one of the funniest, worst-acted, ridiculous scenes I've ever seen in my life. Is that the one where the guy is taking the pills, but the original pills? No. That's the same movie. But earlier in the movie, have you seen that scene? Oh, I got to show you that scene. Have you seen that scene? I want to watch it. Oh, it is so good. It's so bad.

I really like bad movies. I don't know if you guys know that. So fateful findings. I love Samurai Cop. There was another movie that a Korean dude made in the 1988, or 86. It's called Hawkeye, 1986. It's about a Korean dude. He's like a Mel Gibson-y kind of a character, and it's a really good movie. But, yeah, I just feel so full of shame right now. I don't even know. Yeah, I am. Come on. You were just josh-ened.

No, no, no. I just can't. I'm channeling my energy. I can't really... Why are you staring at me? I'm just joshing. I share the restaurant thing. I'm not going to lie. Really? Yeah.

You don't have to do that to put myself to my level. No, but I get called out by Sydney all the time. She's like, oh, you're only acting like that because the fucking guy was like laughing at your jokes. No, I'm a bad guy. He's not that good. It's weird. You are that guy, and I love you because you're that guy. What jokes are you pulling at the restaurant girl?

You know, when you make the owner laugh and they're like bringing you free stuff, even though the food's not that good. But you keep saying it's good. So you keep getting more free food. More bad free food? Because I'm fat. Didn't you have to follow Chevy Chase the other day at the comedy store? Yeah.

I'm trying to switch gears here, sweetie. I know. I just feel bad about my character. We can cut it out if you don't want people to know that about you. Yeah. I aspire to be like you, you know? That's not... That's you.

Jesus. That's ridiculous. You fucking... Just put him in a bad mood. Yeah. From bad to worse. I'll try to switch gears, I guess. Anyway, everyone's the same.

Everyone's the same. Yeah, ask me again. Babe? Yeah? Didn't you have to follow Chevy Chase at the comedy store the other night? Yeah, I had to follow him. Yeah, I mean, I walked in and Chevy Chase was sitting in Mitzi's old chair. And I looked at him and I go, oh my God, it's Chevy Chase.

And then I went to the cover where I go, there's Chevy Chase sitting there. What is he doing here? And they said he's going up. You guys met before? No. No. I have to say that there's different sides. There's different ways I feel about him.

Because he... I grew up with... I mean, he's one of the reasons why I want to be in the business is because as a kid, I loved Fletch, I love the vacation movies, even European vacation, even the Christmas vacation is so funny. Yeah, I love Christmas vacation. I love... The Griswolds?

Yeah, I loved Caddyshack. I loved a lot of the movies that he did. Now, and I'm a huge fucking fan. There are things about him that later in life that I know about him that has affected the way I perceive him. But it's not a personal thing. It's an account of things that I've had friends worked with him or where he has acted in a bizarre fashion.

But I feel bad about that night because he was on stage and he was doing this answer question kind of thing where you ask me a question, I'll answer, which is cool. He wants to get into stand up and what a delightful way of getting into it to go in front of a pack that was sold out. And he walked up there and he was brave and he did it, right? But I was at the cover booth. And I was like, this guy is eating it. And then Eleanor goes, grab me.

He goes, come me out here. And she pulled me out and I go, what's the matter? She's like, the cover booth, that's his daughter. So she was hearing you. And she heard me say that. And so I was just like, why did I say that? You know, like I always open my big mouth. I like her too because she's been working there for months.

I like her so much. So cool. And now I don't even know what to do. Do I say I'm so sorry for saying that? No. No. She probably thought the same thing. No.

She was nervous for her dad. She's working there. Her dad's going up doing this question answer thing. She wants to fit in. She's an actress herself. So I just feel like I'm conflicted about the whole fucking thing. You know, I think the next time I see her, I go, hey, you know, I don't know what to even say, but maybe I should say something.

Let me tell you something. What? Chevy Chase is a fucking icon would probably the thickest skin of anybody around. That's Chevy Chase. Do you think that if even worst case, and I'm pretty sure his daughter is, she's in, she's in the world of comedy. She has equally thick skin, just like you do. Just like a lot of comics do.

I don't think it's a big deal at all. She was probably like, yeah, he's eating it, but no big deal. Yeah, I know. It's, it's, um, you know, in, in life, I have always learned to just keep your fucking mouth shut. Keep your mouth, your opinions to yourself. And I just don't learn those messages because I just keep talking. And every time I open my fucking mouth, I burn bridges.

It's been the case of my whole life. Like I just will say something to the wrong guy. And then they'll look at me and go, you're just talking about my cousin or whatever. You know what I mean? Yeah. I, you know, the whole reason why Vince Vaughn hates me is because of my big mouth. The reason why every, anyone that has a problem with me is because of my big mouth. I just say shit.

And then I just freely without any, and it's not a good character defect. You know, and that now the today shows us about how many problems I have. You know, I just, you know, I, I, I got to learn from these things. At the Institute of Orlando Bloom. No, this Institute I'm going to go to, it's going to, I'm going to be a changed man there. That's cool. Yeah, I'm going to go. My concern about places like that is that you go for a week, right?

Yeah. On this retreat and they're very like, they really try to get into your head and try to like pick apart things about your life that you're not content with. And they try to kind of like piece it back together and maybe you can draw inspiration from it. But what's scary is that when you're out there in the pretty fucking redwoods of California or whatever, to me, that's not real life. Are you able to take everything that they teach you there and apply it when you're living in the difficulties of our day to day, which is in a smaller space?

Yes, because I'll tell you why. People, people say things to me all the time, people that are, you know, that I respect and they say things to me either career decisions or how I'm living my life or a bunch of things. And some of it I take in and I go, okay, I'm with you there. That is something that I can change about myself. And that's the things that are a little more personal and things that I disagree with. I don't take everything, you know, in my own man, my own mind. And I can understand that, you know, in some things, like I'll give you an example.

You know, back in the day when I was in heavily into 12 step groups and I was sober back when I was in my early 20s. And I was talking to one of my sponsors about Mitzi Shore and I had a resentment or whatever. And he goes, well, what you got to do is you got to tell her your resentment. You know, that's in, you know, that's what we do as sober members of whatever, whatever. I go, so you want me to go up to the Mitzi Shore, my boss, the lady that I partly talked to, who's my boss, who has all this power and comedy and tell her about my resentment toward her.

Are you on your fucking mind? Because that's what we do. Yeah. I go, that's what you do. That's you do. You know, there are certain things in, you know, in life where you just kind of go, it's like saying somebody that, you know, is a, an aide at the White House and Barack Obama doesn't say hide in that aide and that Barack and that aide, that aide is like, well, I'm

a sober member. And my sponsor says, I had to say something. Are you on your fucking mind? You let it go. Mr. President. Yeah. Yeah. You let it go.

So like, I'm not retarded. I know that in some circumstances you say it and in some circumstances you, that, you know, if I was, you know, working at an insurance company, maybe if I was working with a coworker and they said something about my wife that I have a resentment and I was sober and my sponsor said, hey, um, next, you know, please don't say that about my wife because it makes, this is how I feel about it. I get that. But when it comes to like, Mitzi Scholl or, you know, the president of the United States,

you don't do it. It's just, it's just not done ever, right? So I think I'm able, I can just go, you know, I hear what you're saying, but no, or yeah, that rings true and that's something that I can work on. So if I go to an institution like that and they say, well, you should do this and you should do that. Or like if they said, you know, I think, you know, doing a podcast, um, isn't really that helpful to your life because you're saying a bunch of things, you know, and I'd be like,

well, it's, it's reinvented my career, Tiger Bell is my family and I will not stop. That's ridiculous. Right? I mean, that's, I would never, I would never agree to that. I would leave. I would get my fucking pillowcase and my little stick and take my underwear and go, fuck off. You say lipstick? Whatever.

A little underwear. Yeah. A little stick. So what I'm saying is, is that, yeah, I think that if I go to a retreat, that I will take in the things that I feel like, you know, rings true to me and something that I can improve. If they say, you know, your porn addiction is causing all these problems, I 100% agree with you.

What do I do? You know what I mean? Well, you know, you need somebody, you need to do this, you need to do that. I will do those things. If it's going to destroy me, I'll do those things. We think that, you know, your fear of rejection is keeping you from booking, you know, certain auditions that you're afraid to do. We think that you should welcome failure.

Okay, I'll do that. If you think that that's going to make my life better, that's something doable. We think that you should quit stand up now. Fuck off. I hear your fucking mind. Fuck you. I would say that. You are a piece of shit by Orlando.

Wait, Bobby, we just started to get along and I would leave. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, I think that, you know, there are things that they might even say things that are very complicated. Like, you know, you have to write things down how you feel about your dad journaling and journaling. I would even do that, you know, because that seems like I'm peeling some sort of onion to get to some sort of root cause of something.

I'm all about journaling. I think that everyone should still journal. Yeah, but just to check in with yourself every day, you know. Yeah, but, um, yeah, I kind of want to do it because Oliver Hudson did it. No Oliver Hudson went to a place over the Christmas break. I'm going to say where it was. Oh, recently. Yeah, he came back and he was a completely different dude.

Good friend. And he looked at me, we were in makeup and he goes, you should do it. I go, really? Yeah. And, you know, they do things where they go in a room, they make animal noises and stuff, but you're good at yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, and I'll do those things. You love those things. Yeah, like, yeah.

They play day to the day where they play like board games and stuff to get in touch with your inner child. Okay. I'll do that. I feel like that's not the right thing to do for you. You're still okay. I'm going to do it. You know what I mean?

Play Jenga. I saw a video of you doing the Christmas dinner. You guys had a dress and drag. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You guys are so competitive. You and your brother. Oh, that's so fun. My brother and I are very competitive.

So we were on the same team, Bobby and I, and we lost. We lost. There was some cheating going on. Next time we do that, though, we need a real judge, somebody outside, outside, you know what I mean? An outsider. Yeah, an outsider, yeah. Because I felt like the other team for sure cheated.

They were cheating for sure. The game is called Maria went to town. Yeah. You guys should play it. It's a parlor game that Filipinos play a lot. Yeah. But, um, that's it. We're over an hour.

Yeah, but we have to cut all that stuff out now. You told me to say it, babe. Yeah, but I didn't know what you were going to say. What did you think I was going to say instead? I don't remember, but I just remember it not being that. And then when you said it, I was just like, oh my God, maybe I am shallow. Maybe, you know, maybe that, that, maybe that is the reason why I do it. Dude, I wanted to, I don't know.

It's a difficult thing to really even ponder because I've been doing it for so long that so what is the root of why I do it and why, I hate a lot of things about myself. I know I'm just saying, I'm just so many things about myself and I'm sure you hate a lot of things about me, so I'm just, you know, but you know, the one thing that I'm not going to give up is this podcast and I'm not going to stop doing it because it really is the one thing in my life that's consistent and fun to do and it's something that I have control over and I know it's going well because, you know, people that didn't want to be a part of it are now wanting to be a part of it and I say to those people, no, I do.

I go, I asked you two years ago to help us and they're like, yeah, we didn't think it was going to, yeah, well, it is a thing and now that we're about and we're sailing away, have fun on shore, okay, so, so I know this is a boat that's sailing, it's probably sinking right now because of my mood, but give me an unhelpful advice, maybe that'll help me. Unhelpful advice with Bobby and- No, we'll do it afterwards. Kalayla. They're going to kiss, kiss. Dear Tiger Belly, I'm a Korean girl and had some plastic surgery.

I lose surgery, nose job, chin implant. My freshman year of college, I'm now 32. I've never told my current boyfriend that I've had plastic surgery and I've been with him for two years. Now I feel like it's too late to tell him and I feel like he'll hate me because he always tells me that he hates girls that get plastic surgery. What should I do? I've never shown him any baby pictures because he would know immediately.

I feel like I have to hide a large part of my identity and history from him because it feels terrible. Bobby, do you hate girls with plastic surgery or should I come out clean to my man? Thanks. Love you all. Well, you know what happened to that Chinese man, remember that Chinese guy who had ugly babies? Married that woman.

Married that woman, had ugly babies, and then left her because he found out that she had plastic surgery. And that's why he has ugly babies. So before it gets to that point, you should say something. And also at the same time, it's like, if you got it done, you did it for a reason. You probably look great and it's good for your self-esteem. I don't mind that, right? What I do mind is the lie.

Deception. Deception. You should just sit down with them and go, listen, this is what I did. I don't regret it. I look good. I'm proud of it. You know, own up to it and go, if he doesn't want to be a part of your life because you had plastic surgery, then what kind of man is that guy, right?

But she is entitled to her privacy as well, sweetie. She doesn't need, it's her body, her choices. She doesn't need to let anybody know if she doesn't want to. Okay, but the thing is if he's going to breed with her on the basis of a chin, then he's a shitty guy. Do you know what I mean? If your entire decision of having children hinges on a chin, do you know what I mean? I don't think it does.

Yeah, but if you, I mean, let's say you and I, you and I want to get pregnant. You can't get pregnant and we go to the hospital and the doctor goes, pulls me aside and goes, you know that she's a man, right? Kalyla. Yeah. I'd be like, what? I guess I should tell you this. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Like, no, I'm just giving you a center. I know, I know, I don't believe the obvious. I'm just making it up. You know what I mean? But let's say she said that, right? In nowhere in my head, I'm going to be like, yeah, but I love her. I think that's a big, that's too big of a thing to look at. But that's different than reproduction.

I think it's, it's, it's, it's a extreme version of what this is, I think. Yeah, that's a very extreme version, but we're just talking about a chin. It's not going to get in the way of her ability to reproduce or get pregnant. That's fine. But what I'm saying though, it's still something that you hid from me, right? It's hiding it. You're hiding it. And I just would rather be honest with it.

To me, it's like, if I, if I looked at photos of you and you look like, you know, a ghoul. Like, what if you look like me? Like, yeah, she, no, look like, long hair, George, with long hair, yeah. With George, a long hair, right? And you look like that now, I'd be like, ah, that's a big thing for me. Yeah. Also, wouldn't she want to know if he really loved her? Yeah.

I think that's a thing that if I, if she told me, that's one thing, right? I'd be like, okay, she's being honest. I love her. Yeah. But she's dealing with a guy who was outwardly said he hates chicks with plastic surgery. Well, that's the dilemma you're in. Right? We're supposed to help her through the dilemma.

But it's supposed to be unhelpful. So do what we're starting to do. Yeah. I mean, I don't, I don't, I mean, I, I, come on, she would have to tell them. It's in no way. Yes. You have to tell her. Because then it's like, if you didn't tell your partner, like I didn't want to, I don't

have kids, right? 10 years down the line, you're like, oh, I don't want to have kids, but you took this whole time. You told me you wanted to have kids. Well, now we're 10 years in. It's different than a fucking chin and a nose you guys. She straight up hates girls that have plastic surgery. Right.

But then if, if, if this is what I would do, I'm like, okay, this guy doesn't like it, right? But also this is my body. This is my, you know, this is the choice that I made well before I knew him. But here are all my baby pictures. If he looks at them and he doesn't question them, then I, everything's great. That's the best case scenario. Okay.

Now if he asked me, wow, like you were straight up, like you didn't have a chin and you look like your nose was fixed. Did you get a big, yeah. That's it. And if he has a problem with it, dump his ass. Yeah. He's a fucking piece of shit. You know what I mean?

You did it because he felt insecure about it, whatever your reasons are, they're valid, your body, whatever. What I'm saying is you should not withhold baby pictures and so much of your life because you're worried about him dumping you because if he does dump you, he's a piece of shit. Basically what I'm saying, baby. I mean, that's exactly what I'm saying. I'm just saying that just, it should just be about honesty. It's like, but he should, she shouldn't sit him down and be like, there's something

I need to say. That's a little too fucking serious for me. If you were, let's say I was a girl, we were dating. You were Jewish and I said I was Jewish, but then later you found out I was a Muslim. Would that be a thing? I think that'd be a thing for a lot of people that are Jewish. Yeah. There we go.

So that's not a chin and a nose. Oh my God, you guys are taking it too far. Yeah, but guys look at things like that, right? We're very physical. Like we're, we're not going to lie, like come on, physical attraction is a thing. Yeah. It's a thing. Yeah.

This is a guy's point of view, I think also just don't lie to me, just don't lie to me. But getting a nose job is shallow, but that's your opinion, George. What if she's, this is something that she was a, you know, really, really bullied about. This is something that people, she's been really down about her whole life. It's shallow to you, but very meaningful to her. Cause maybe it, you know, it made her less insecure, broader out of her shell. All those reasons are reserved for her and not for you to ever make a judgment about. Those are her reasons.

And you should respect those reasons. I'm trying to think, I'm trying to think, I'm trying to think. You have a point. I'm going to go with you. Just do the opposite of what George said. Yeah. I don't want, I don't like what he's saying. Well, I don't like what I have to jump.

The reason I'm saying this is cause my mom had a nose job. She doesn't let anybody else know, but because she was early on in her weightlifting career. She was a weightlifter. I did not know that. She had a bad accident and the bar broke her nose. And you know, she very quietly got a nose job to fix a very broken nose, which she was very insecure about for years. And my dad's like, yeah, of course, this is in the eighties or in the early nineties.

My mom had surgery too. Did you know her eye? You couldn't see her pupil. She was so cross-eyed that the pupil went into her fucking face. Really? Yeah. I don't know how they did it, but they did something to fix it. Right?

Yeah, but she doesn't want anyone to know. Right. And the same thing with my mom. And it's all these reasons why, but if I came out, you know, all cross-eyed, that'd be weird. Yeah. But I, I respect her decision to do it and made her very insecure for a very long time. You're right.

Hey, what's her name? Uh, we'll just say last name is Lee. Lee. I changed my mind. Fuck him. Fuck. Keep it your secret. Secrets.

Yeah. Keep it your secret. Who cares? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know, but there's a lot of things that I'd say about me that came out here that was real. Like I didn't, it was ugly.

I feel like now I'm going to be the enemy. No, you're not going to. I'm going to say this. For pointing these out? I'm going to say this to hey sleepers. I know you're listening. I need help. This is important.

It's very important. You know, I'm going to show it's playing up together and, um, I know that a lot of people see the show and they go, I'm barely on it, which is true. There's some episodes that they leave me out of it, but I have one coming out. It's the Valentine's episode, and I'm in the whole thing. It's about my character. I really need people to see it. That specific one.

That specific one. I think it's like February 12th, I think? Yeah. So look at your TV guide, or however you do it, and please, and I can't have you DVR it. Watch it live. And anyone listening, you're doing me a big favor for the Valentine's episode of Spilling Up Together. Watch it live.

Okay. I think it's the Tuesday before Valentine, so whatever date that is, I think it might be the 12th. Yeah. I would really much appreciate it. It's great because they don't do this, but they specifically showed my episode to the President of Warner Brothers, and he came up to me and he goes, he hugged me on the cheek, and he said, it was really funny.

The Asian guy? No. He's Peter Roth. Oh, he's Peter Roth Asian, he's not Asian. It's not an Asian. Is that a traditional Asian name? Who the fuck is the Asian guy? There's a Warner Brothers like CEO who is a Japanese dude.

Yeah, but he's the president of the television. Oh, okay. Never mind. I mean, of all Warner Brothers is Asian. I don't know. What Asian guy? What the fuck are you talking about, bro? Peter Roth, obviously.

The Japanese Peter Roth. Peter Roth ain't no Asian. He's like Italian or something. Yeah. Dude, what the fuck are you talking about? Anyway, sorry, you just put a fucked up mood to the whole thing. Yep. No, because I'm thinking of myself, is he Asian?

All this time. Did the Asian guy kiss my cheek? Yeah, yeah. So check that out, and it's so cold in here, I don't know who put the air on, but I'm going to go turn it off. All right, thank you. Oh, any shows for Bobby Klyla? Yes, Bobby will be at the Irvine Improv February 21st weekend, I think.

Oh, wow. Okay. So everybody, please come out if you're in the LA area. That would be awesome. Michael Bisping. I'm going to force... Might be there? Oh, yeah, that's right.

Maybe. Michael Bisping might be there. Denise. Yeah. And also, I'm going to force George and Gilbert to be there with me. Okay. Wait, when? At the weekend of February 21st, I believe.

Yeah, George, we might even have some shirts. Oh, okay. Maybe. Yeah, we might. I also wanted to give a shout-out to, well, Gobi is trying to give a shout-out, too. To both. Can you close that door, please, George? Thanks, George.

What's your shout-out? Who's your shout-out? My shout-out is to a girl named Nicole and her partner for... I posted last week about a cat my sister found in her yard, and she's the sweetest... She's the sweetest cat ever, and Nicole stepped up and said, I'll foster, and so the cat is still with her. Yeah, tell them about the cat, though. I mean, you've met the cat.

The cat... I... Okay. This cat. Listen. It's a special cat. Listen, this cat is the most special cat I've ever seen. I really...

I almost... In my head, in my twisted mind, I was like, how could I get it? You wanted to keep... Another animal? You can do it. But at the end of the day, it doesn't make any sense. But that's how special this cat is. This cat is so friendly, so loving, so cute.

He's a tabby. He's a boy, right? I think it's a boy. I think most tabbies are boys. Yeah, yeah. But he's the best. So, I already have a tabby, right, Goo Goo? Yeah, that's your tabby.

Yeah, that's my tabby. But, yeah. So, I think that if we're still actively trying to find his owner, we're putting up flyers, but if no one claims him in a week or so, he'll probably be up for adoption. So, we also scan him for a chip and have a chip. No chip, yeah. Nothing. Nobody's come forward.

It's the best cat ever, guys. But this cat's super, super special, super sweet. So, if you guys are interested in living in the L.A. area, send a DM to Gilbert. Yeah! Direct message. Direct message. Direct message Gilbert. All right.

I'm allergic to cats, so this will be great. I'll give it to my special owners, because I am not on there. Yeah, yeah. Thanks again to our, or George, you have any shoutouts? To your cousin or anything? Oh, another girl I wanted to do a shoutout. Who? My cousin, Juliana, desperately wanted, my cousin, my cousin, my niece, Juliana, lives

in Cebu, and she was promised two tickets to this fucking, I guess, this show, this concert that she would want to go to. So she got all dressed up, and it was 5 p.m., and she was supposed to meet my other niece, and my other niece was supposed to have the two tickets for her. So Juliana is ready to go, and then her mom calls me and says, the tickets fell through, Juliana doesn't have tickets. But lo and behold, a Tiger Belly fan from Cebu, steps up to the plate and gives tickets to my niece for free.

It's amazing. And they're not cheap tickets. That's amazing. And so I want to give a shoutout to her handle is ESA, please. That's I-S-S-A-P-L-E-A-S-E, ESA, please. So shoutout to you, and when we get to Cebu, we'll come say hi. Yeah, we'll come say hi. Isn't that sweet?

She's so sweet. That's so nice of her. So sweet. Oh, George has a message for the whole slept kingdom. He wants us, he wants us. We want to thank you guys for getting us in the top 40 of iTunes comedy charts. So we just hit 5,000, so a review, so thanks to all of you guys. And George, where can we send packages?

1626, North Wilcox, number 161, Hollywood, California, 90028, ba-boom. Send Bobby, Kalayla, George, or anyone who's- Dreamwater powder. He needs it, guys. He's running out. I don't have any. And thank you all to the Real Papaya Super Sleepers and premium episode subscribers on our Patreon.

To be part of the exclusive Tiger Belly family, go to patreon.com slash Tiger Belly. Kalayla, where can we follow you? Like, telemedicay on all forms of social media. You can find everything Bobby and Bobby Lee live. George. George underscore Kimmel on Instagram. Have a good night. Bye, everybody.

Bye, everybody. Bye, everybody. Bye, everybody. Hey, Prime members, you can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon Music. Don't forget to subscribe to our YouTube channel.