TigerBelly - Episode 197: Steve Byrne & Bobby Lee Bury a Hatchet
Episode Date: June 5, 2019Steve Byrne and Bobby go titty for tatty. We talk being ragefully tired, Vince Vaughn, MySpace friends, and a body slam. Watch ALWAYS AMAZINGGet bonus premium episodes every week: h...ttps://patreon.com/tigerbellySupport us by supporting our sponsors!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey
You
Five four three two one
I
Fuck I fucked it up right. I
Want to be free
Like the burp. Oh fuck. I fucked it up. Give me another shot. Do the countdown. Hey, we're we're turning all the mics on the camera
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. This is the first time we're hearing this. Yeah. Thank you five four
Don't even do that. Okay. Just go action. Oh and rolling action. I
want to be free
Like the blue birds flying by me
Like the waves out on the blue
See if your love has to time
I don't know how fucking goes, but it's a good song is by the Monkos monkeys
And the monkeys are rule and they're all some of them are dead. Which one is it Peter Doherty?
Oh, you know some of them, but God bless you and take care because they were a fucking great band even though it was put together by
Studio
Clash put together by studio. They were there were the clash wasn't an organic gang band
They were put together by a record company. All right, so here we go and
You know, let me say something. Okay, you know what a true friendship is a true friendship is
built on
Love but also
Hostile environments. Oh and a hostile people. Okay, right?
But it's purely the foundation is pure love and it's you know grit by by hand of working head
Class class people. Gotcha. You got it. Yeah, and that's what I love about you
Because even though I don't know what I'm saying you always
Agree with me and you always make me feel like I know what I'm doing
I only agree with things that make sense. Thank you. God bless you and take care and enjoy you and your face
It's flatter than ever today. Okay. That's you flat earth. That's you right there. Oh, is that a wall? Yeah, okay?
You're mean you're not shindler
You're one of the bad whites, okay VBW. I love you and my beautiful princess flower
Colocal, thank you
Licks is you I mean
The hood good the hood I'm leaning into it. I love this guy your cousin Bryce
So years ago many many years ago when I was I'm gonna introduce the guy. I can't wait
I really can't I can't wait either. I can't wait either many many years ago. Um, I
Did a I did the tonight show
The only time I did it and a couple of days may three or four days later. Berry cats calls me
Mommy
I have a client, you know, he wants to talk to he's Asian, but he lives in New York
So I haven't called me you called me and this has never happened before in the history of me being in the comedy business
Where another comic who I don't know calls me just to compliment me
Wow, right. So he calls me goes. Hey, man. I'm from New York. I'm half Korean
I saw your tonight show. I thought you killed it man. You know when I come to LA
I'd like to meet you and hang out and whatever. I've never had that happen and this fuck did that no hostility
No hostility. It was at that time
Yeah, at that time it was built on pure love just love 60s love, okay, even with the fucking flower in the gun
Right, you know, I mean they grew their hair out from their pits down to their knees
He's a great stand-up. I've done tours with him before I've done many shows with him. We've been in battles
We fought and where we scream at each other
But you know, he's been in many battles actually you had an infamous battle with Dan cook outside his apartment one time remember that
Ladies are gentlemen, he's a headliner
Um, he's from Pittsburgh originally and he's a dear friend and I'll know her for I'll know him for the rest of my life
His name is Steve Byrne. Give him a round of applause
Welcome. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. You're welcome. Okay. Yes, um
Thanks for doing my podcast. Yeah, I feel like I've done it already. You have yeah
Has he done the podcast before? Oh, you've talked about him so many times. I have free episode. I do talk about you a lot
Yes, thank you. Yeah. Yeah. Have I said good things?
Some no
That's just some bad things. No. Yeah, those things get back to me, but I
Yeah, I know you though. So I don't I know how you are. So I don't oh, how am I?
Well, even when you said like we've had our battles. Yeah, okay, I
Think I come at things from like
Like a pragmatic kind of like, you know, I don't get my emotions involved
I think when we talk there have been times where emotionally I'm confused by the decisions you've made
But I just say
I've never like when we've argued I've never left a conversation saying you just burned a major bridge
I don't do shit like that and I've said that you said that
You said that to me as you walk to like a Corolla and
And sped out at 30 miles per hour of the comic. Okay. Yeah, my car has nothing to do with this fucking kind of business
I burn a major bridge. I know Hollywood power player Bobby Lee
Toyota Corolla. Yeah, it speeds away. Yes. What was it before Corolla? You're right. Oh, thank you. Thank you
Deep cut. I'll tell you what a
What a great friend this is. Yeah, he knows I love Oasis
This is one of the things that irritates me, but I again, I like I don't I don't get I don't say you burn a major bridge
I just go that's Bobby
His car your car broke down or something. Yeah, I did your car broke down the same Corolla. Yes. Yes
Thank you. Probably that night as he was leaving. Yeah
And then I had a Hyundai Santa Fe at the time and I was doing
Was it purple? No, it's silver. Oh, yeah, so reason why I thought it was purple. I'm not from Minnesota
So I lent to I said, hey, you take my car. I'm going on the road. Use my car while I'm gone
Who does that? So I first of all, let's think about what who does it a comic a friend of whatever a friend
What a whatever a friend whatever a friend when you burn the bridge you burn it
It takes time to rebuild it takes time to rebuild right so so I lend him my car my car he took
I get back in my car and I go to play my Oasis. I go, where's my Oasis?
DVDs not one not to like three Oasis DVDs. I I call I go CDs. I go Bob
Where's my I threw them out the window? Oh my
Why we because I told you because you don't listen
Well, I like you my car. No, I know you know are down and I like you know my car
This is who I deal with. I don't know. I'm the bad guy, but that's the thing. I got another one
You guys ready for another one
It's right and then we'll move on to other things. Okay, but you don't fucking listen, right? I don't do that
I don't like the band
Why is it tampered all over the fucking thing like like it's a flyer for some sort of fucking nightclub or something
You don't like Oasis. We watch it. I like it now. I love them now, but at the time
I didn't like them. I thought they were like too poppy. Oh my I like them now
I apologize. How much money do I you 60 bucks? Nothing now. Okay worth us. Yeah. All right, so what's the second thing I did?
Uh, oh, you want what I'm sure you now. I have so many things that you've done. Okay. Good. Good. What you will go tit for tat
Good. Oh, you'll get it for dad. Yeah. All right. All right. Let's go for that then this guy calls me
Right, and he goes get it over because I was on a sitcom called animal practice
Uh-huh. It got cancelled and I was really hurt by it. Sure. It was a really tough time because
um, I didn't have Kala at the time and
That was and I called you the night it premiered. I bet you don't remember that. I know. Thank you. I watched it
I said congratulations. Thank you. He doesn't make he forgets these things. Yeah
This next part counts, right, so I watched it
So then he calls me goes. Sorry about animal practice, but you know, I have a show
Like a yeah, Sullivan and sons, right? Because I was thinking about you know, um
You know writing a character with you in it like so reoccurring and it's gonna be really cool and you know
I'm at the time Ahmed was on it the wonderful and the multi-faceted Owen Benjamin
You know, I mean just the pure talent that he is of course and I go. Yeah
Yeah, you're gonna write in you know, you know when somebody calls you for something like that
You start you lay down in bed and you start fantasizing
What it's gonna be like at the Warner Brothers lot, you know what it's like rehearsing laughing with your friends
You're actually working you're on TV with your you know, there's nothing better, right?
And then three months later. I find out Ken Jung is doing it
Did that did that did that happen your old your old pal, right? Yeah, so my thing is is this okay?
I know why that happened. No, you think you know why it happened and you bring this up
I like you're wrong. Oh, you're tired right now. I your eyes. You're getting ready for that's my eyes are
Very eyes are a full right now. Let me just ragefully tired
I know, okay, so it doesn't make any sense. Okay, but we're in a different planet right now. Okay, and oh, we are yeah
And we're not gonna get to a point you and I we're gonna scream each other because I love you and I love what?
No, I love you. I love what we're doing right now. It's fun and we're mending things and that's great
Okay, okay, so on the reason why I think the reason why and I think this is the reason why is because you're the guy that
Was producing it doesn't like me. That is not true. He likes me. Let me ask you something. Yes, there's Vince Vaughn like me. Yes
I'm looking you in the eyes. Oh, wow. Yeah, I think
In my head I correct me correct me a firmware. Oh, here we go. I don't know his story, so I don't know
With Bobby
Bobby has an ability to go down the rabbit hole. I think sometimes of insecurity and make things a bigger deal than they actually are
Correct. Thank you. Yeah, so I think that there are times where you get things in your head and you start making them
Via osmosis insecurity, which you you know, you told me at times that you you know, I think we all do anybody in this business does
Right, but I think I'm glad you said that. I think there's a
I'm glad you said that I don't know if these two words
Should ever make sense together otherwise, but I think it makes sense for Bobby where there is an insecure narcissism
By that I mean I was gonna say ragefully tired, but
I know like it doesn't make sense together, but I think with you it does where you take
Situation like that. Yeah, and you morph it into your head. There's a self-importance there and thinking someone hates you that much. Yes. Oh
That they've actually
Actually sat and pondered about their hatred for you when in reality they probably don't at all at all and
You make all right. I okay. I'm gonna say this
I'll say okay. No, I'll say this cuz I let me ask my all right. Let me ask you a little titty
I'm gonna give you a little tatty
I'm gonna give you that I'm gonna give you dolly part and teddy right now. Okay, please
So are you kidding about a sandwich? Yeah, are you saying to me then? Yeah, that he's never had hard feelings toward me
I can honestly tell you that is correct. He's never had hard feelings towards you. Wow
Wow, so
When we used to because I used to hang out with the guy, right? Right and then all of a sudden he if I say hi
Don't meet wasn't saying hi back. What is that? Okay? See here's what I know. Okay?
You're asking me what I know from my own personal rights and from your own personal experience from the time
I've met him which has been many years. Yeah, I'm time. I've known you which has been many
Yeah, yeah from a time on Hollywood has been many years. Yeah, I've never seen him exhibit anything towards you or
Personally to me that has been of negative nature. Oh, I see it, but I just can't do
Stuff that he's producing. I
Wouldn't say that no that movie that you did you know me at the comedy with you Jimmy O Yang with that movie, right?
You said I could be in it
Right, and I wasn't in it. Why?
When I wrote this, okay, look at his eyes
racially tied up
Because his eyes turn white
When he lies your eyes turn white the wider one you lie
My eyes turn you're half white lie. Yeah, so it
Punches in it's cool. Go ahead
This the entertainment value of this show has gotten flatter
So tell me flatter so tell me so when this all starts coming to fruition, right?
I did have a discussion with you, right about hey, you know, I have this thing going on
There's gonna be some roles that are gonna be enveloping and I'd love to talk to you down the line and
Include you I did say that. Yeah, right. Okay. So the minute this thing goes to
To the hill, right and it's like, okay, we're in pre-production. We got to get going
all the sudden
Things start spiraling. It's done by committee and it's not just me
So if I was just solely in charge of doing things, right? I
Think the casting would have been different on many different fronts. For example, Billy Gardell
You know Billy love them Mike and Molly, right? Yeah, okay
so I had a conversation with Billy about about potentially playing the headliner in this film and
When this is all going okay, there's
Producers there's investors and the investors have
Their input to put as well. I'm trying to be diplomatic because I'm still obviously in the throes of of completing this
so
There is a process of which we got to decide these things by committee and if I look one of the most difficult
Conversations I've ever had my life was to call Billy Gardell and say hey, I'm sorry, but it's just not gonna work out and I had
I named the character Billy G. It's named who took it who took the part Cedric the entertainer, but it's not who took it
It's also when you're casting I know what works man. So I know how it fucking works
I know because you're always by your typewriter creating so no, but I know but I have been on
You know shows right and I and they and they go who's great for this part and we throw out our names
Right that we like right and there's a gigantic process where everyone has their say so I understand how it there are in that way
Exactly. There are people that say why I think XYZ is great. I think ABC is great right then. It's also
Representatives getting involved. Yeah, I know they're just stop for a second though
It wasn't even for a specific part you were calling me about this come for a day and we'll fit you in and improvise even that
Was on this, you know, it wasn't as if you know, I was gonna do a lead role in the first place
I get what you're saying and I I want to believe you and I do want to believe you
Yeah, and I'm probably 70% there. Okay, right. That means everything to me. Okay, so
I've been waiting. Yeah, I'm 70% there. I'll never know the truth. Yeah, right and I'll never know
And I may never know that 30% and that's what's gonna cripple me
That's that's what I take to the grid. That's true
What was it like to get that 30% because then Bobby would answer my text messages
Now let me say this though. No, I'm ready. Go for me. Are you ready? You're okay. I'm not angry towards you though
I don't have resent. Okay, so
This is who I'm in business with. Okay. It's who I'm in business with so Kim's a comedy, right?
We do the DVD. Oh gee. Oh, here we go. Here we go. Taddy Taddy Taddy Taddy. Now it's Taddy's turn. Uh-huh. So
We do the DVD we lock up our first
live show in San Francisco. We're gonna go to the punchline
You're the big cheese. You're on mad TV. Everybody knows who you are
I had just done a half hour. Ken is still Dr. Ken
Kevin Shea is at only two bottles of whiskey a day. So we
Great joke write that down. Great joke. Wow. I love it. So we we booked this thing. Okay, and
Bobby is what makes Bobby great to me is the fact that Bobby
Goes through life to the beat of his own drum
And that is something I've always respected and loved about him
But at times when you are doing a show with somebody, it's not the most conducive when you're doing something by committee, right?
But at the same time, you're the headliner between all of us for sure. You're the biggest name
so I
Think the first show is on a Thursday. I
Talked to Ken on Wednesday. Yeah, Ken's like you all said I'm like I'm all set and Ken's like
Why don't you make sure Bobby's ready and I go? Okay, so I I don't I've never toured with Bobby before
So I call Bobby up
Wednesday night. I go. Hey, are you ready? And you go ready for what? I
Go for our shows this weekend where?
San Francisco. Oh, how am I gonna get there?
The fuck you mean how you're gonna get there
You should have booked the fucking so what I do. Oh, I had my plane tickets booked and everything
I said fuck it. I'll be at your house tomorrow at 9 a.m.
And we're gonna drive to San Francisco together. Wow, so I picked you up and drove you to San Francisco to make sure that you
Were at the show, okay?
Not only that not only do I do that three hours look at me
Now I'm listening three hours. Do you remember this part at what part this part three hours in yeah, all right
Yeah, I'm driving probably listening to oasis before I lent you my car. You threw out my CDs. Yeah, and then I just hear
Okay
I look over and Bobby's looking at me jerking off. I go. What are you doing? He goes no one will know I
Go, I know I know and I apologize and I apologize. I apologize. That's um
Unforgivable behavior using it. No, I was completely sober
You were sober and you did that. I don't know. I don't remember what you're why do
Whatever or not, whatever we were going to the punchline that very first time
Because I know what happened when we went home
Freddie Soto died. Oh, okay. Okay, so we can pinpoint because I remember you driving me back from San Francisco back to LA
Which I could have flown but I I know you could have and I'm telling you to pull over. Yeah, right
Mm-hmm, cuz I got a call that Freddie had died
That's right. I went to the side of the road and I was devastated
I remember that and I remember driving off to so yeah, and I did that to Steve Trevino as well
So I apologize to him and I did not I'm kind of insulted now
I'm really insulted because I did it to him because Steve Trevino and I are not like in the same like looks wise
I know so now I'm kind of like I like
Anything chip chip monk Mexicans
Oh shit, he looks like a chipmunk. Does he not? Yeah. All right. So here's the deal. Okay. I apologize for masturbating in the car
That's wrong
And he do you did another thing for me
That was helpful with people don't know about this, but when
Ken had his
Meltdown mm-hmm at cobs where he physically assaulted me. No, he never physically so this is what happened
So I'm sure you did you tell yourself this did you do this? Well, first of all, what did you not get in between us?
This is what happened. Okay. Okay, so I think that what happened is that when the Kim's
Fractured we I think we had like an opportunity to really kind of do some stuff
Along where you guys on the road for it together over the course of like maybe a year
Yeah, but only that it's like listen, it was a concept that now would work
I think that if we would never do it, but I'm just saying that if you I
Steve Burr not Steve, but you're Steve Burr Ken Jung
That's it us three
People that have been on television
Right well to do it. Okay, we would draw and it would be great, right? Okay back then
We did just didn't Ken wasn't the Ken Jung that we know sure of today
You've done so much stuff since then. Yeah, I think that you know, you would be great now. Yeah, you know, it'll never happen
Yeah, well, I think if you do it without me with Ken with Ken
I wouldn't I'm just saying if you do if I see a fucking billboard
No, I wouldn't you the only way I do it is if with right we were to get fucking weeded out of it
You want another war friend? We'll have another
We'll have another fuck of war well the the Kim's kind of like
Imploded pretty quickly because at the time you were working. You're still with Abby, correct?
Yes, okay, so we did a new year easy easy with her. No, no
I I get it. No, she's not supportive of you. Yes, and she's a great representative
Which is what you want. Okay, you want somebody that's in your corner. Yeah, thank you looks out for solely for you
We did a show together
Yeah, for New Year's I forget where that was we did a New Year's show and I
Think you got paid something like 10 grand and
Then me Ken and Bobby me Ken and Kevin each got I think over the course of the week and we each got like 300 bucks
We're like what the fuck we thought there was gonna be some disparity of like of like wealth
But we know Bobby's the headliner, but we thought that was so this do you think you think that this provides thank you
Thank you. I can tell you done this before
So this provides the beginning of like where I think Ken and myself
Felt like it's a little, you know, we're a little bummed by this, right?
So then we did the the will the Wilton together and it was something along the same lines where you were getting a lion's share and granted
Given Bobby's cash-in resume. He deserves a lion's share, but I think the disparity and pay was so much that it was like
It was kind of like insulting. So I think that's where Ken took it
You know to be to you know as Ken started like ascending to heights like he stood at that time, right?
He was on the he had already done
Like the office and curb curb and all that kind of stuff
But he's starting to do stuff. He was he was in that a couple of Wilson with Will Ferrell movies
Yeah, he was coming up. Yeah. Yeah, he was coming up. Yeah. Yeah
So he was he was like deserving as something but I think that then you know Ken is a very prideful guy and
He I think that you two had some
perhaps like I
Don't know if it's like a rivalry, but I think that there was like a I don't know
I don't know what I'd classified as but basically it came to a point where it was just like I think Ken was like
Respectively saying I don't know that I necessarily want to continue with the Kims
And I think we all kind of felt that way at a certain point, you know where it was just like all right
Well, we ran a course and it was always doing well in San Francisco, but maybe not anywhere else, right? Why was fun?
Hawaii was we did a Hawaii. I'll tell you why it was great
and so
then
We go to San Francisco and we put together the show me Ken and Kevin and you weren't on the bill
They didn't want me on it. Well, yeah, the group. Let's be honest. Please. Give me something
Something right I got kicked out of the group. I think three of us collectively. Can I be honest with you?
Want me to be completely honest? That's what I want. This is about a podcast
We collectively
agreed that we were like
Given the way we were treated the last few shows, especially in terms of pay. We felt well fuck it
Let's just do it on our own. That's what we thought because kicked out of the group
so but what I did is because as
We booked it and as we're getting closer to the date I
Just felt guilty and I was like if we're doing this we should have Bobby along and I
Staged a coup you didn't I stage a coup on my own because I love Ken and
I love Bobby and I know that Ken loves Bobby and I know that Bobby loves Ken and I think we all collectively
Internally whether we admit it or not
Depending on the precipice of how you feel at the time
Everybody feels that way. So I was going to the guys of I'm gonna fly Bobby up there
I bought you a ticket got your room and I flew you up there so that we could make peace and
Proceed forward from that
I think Ken had a lot going on
Personally at the time that's right. That's true. I think that is true. We all know yeah, and I think
What happened was you showed up and I think you stoked some
Emotions that weren't resolved and I know what you know how I'll tell you what the light was okay the fuse was there, right?
But me lighting it. Oh you you lit it. Oh, I lit the
I know and exactly tell you it was about my space. So what happened was I'll tell you why I love this
It's because you know how my space you you remember how my space you could have your top friends, okay, right?
So oh
So for a year or two years me Steve Byrne
We're all in his top thing and he was still on my top 10 or 15 or whatever it was, right?
But then all of a sudden his top was Judd Apatow will fair all his new fancy friends
So I just wanted to break his balls and go hey, dude. What's up?
And I said it I came up from behind him
I remember yeah, he was sitting in with his guitar in the green room upstairs, right?
Yeah, and I came aggressive and which I shouldn't have done it. Yeah, but I went what's up, dude
I'm off of your top friends because you have new Hollywood friend came out hot
I came out hot like really and he was a complete opposite of why I got the ticket right exactly
I fucked it up, right? Yeah, and then it's something happened where it he got in my face
And it was hostile though
Do you remember what he said you came out hot and he wasn't prepared to have that conversation?
He didn't know so I didn't know I was gonna be there. I don't blame him for
Reacting my fault again. Well, I think that had you come out instead of like the fucking top eight shit
And just come out and go hey, can we all have a conversation? Oh, yeah? Yeah? Yeah?
I said I don't get it wrong. Hey what the fuck I read it wrong again
Fucking Julia whites you're fucking six and I'm not even in yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, so then you guys were screaming at each other
There's a line of people outside and it looked like you guys were gonna start fighting and Kevin Shea goes
Dude, you should go break this up and I looked at him and I said this might be the cutest fight
I've ever seen in my life
If Ken Jeong and Bobby Lee started wrestling, but I broke it up and then uh and then I think you guys
Resolved your issues down the line years later, but I know in talking to Ken and I don't like to voice anything
I know you don't I don't like to talk publicly about conversations
I've had with my friends personally, but I do know this for a fact. I do know that hit that you
Absolutely, he's expressed this to me many times that you have
Helped him out early on in his career putting him in all those sketches on mad all those years ago
And I know that he does love and care about you as do I I mean I you know no matter what our ups and downs are
I still have a deep affinity and affection for you because when I first moved LA you were literally I think the first comic
I hung out with at Dublin's and
Met you and every time I was there you were always so accommodating and helpful and so kind of me
And we'd go out for late-night bites and everything
So what's your next story you want to show to me about?
No, because um, you know now when you're talking it brings me back to um
You know experiences and moments. I've had you know with you know guys like you've been around for very long
You've made my friend for very so long and we've been in business together
And we had our ups and downs, but you know at the end of the day
You even though there are if I look back in the past
Even the things that you've said today, you know, I mean I
I agree with it. Yeah for the most part. There's some things I could argue, right?
But I'm not gonna but because I cuz that's coming from your point of view and also I have no hard feelings
I really at the end of the day don't have any hard
I don't have any hard
I love you so much right and I do too and in every like incidents where you've had battles with like
Dan cook and stuff like that. I've been on your side
But I've never had battle like a battle with dain like dain picked that issue with me
I know I never I know he did which I did our podcast we talked about. We never talked about it. We never talked about it
Right. No, he was here. I defended you
I just say whatever comes of mine and I go with it. Yeah, that is true. I have to say to that um
That you know, I love your wife
Okay, I do I think she is there her butt here. Yeah, but no, there's no bug. Okay. Okay. I was wondering where this is going
There is no negativity. Okay. All right. I really like the life you've carved out carved out for yourself
You know, thank you. I know your parents. Yes. I know your brother. You know, your wife is great
Your kids are fucking adorable. I've never met them. I
Get it I
Get it. I've never met Ken's kids. It's fine. Yeah, a lot of comics kids
I've never met because they I feel like they think that I'm gonna like when Ike Barron holds
Had a family and this and that it just we just stopped
You know, I mean because he thinks that I'm gonna pull my dick out. No, no, no
I don't think that's it. I don't think that and I would never think that I I don't know Ike
But I guarantee doesn't think that I think like I've never met Ken's kids
Oh talk to it about each other's kids and stuff
but I think when you have kids, it's like I
Think the last thing you want to do is
Like do one more thing with your kids because you're so exhausted and drained like today
I I spent a little bit of time with that. I haven't seen them and in within two hours
I'm like absolutely zapped absolutely crippled. You just want to like have dinner get them to bed and then like have your life back
Wow, so I think sometimes it's like you don't want to bring that burden of
Energy and no stop touch. Don't do that. Stop hitting it. You don't want to bring that around. Oh, I think that's what it is
Yeah, it's not that you're gonna pull your dick out
Which right you did because to me when you were jerked out. Yeah, but we're comics and adults and friends
And that's what I would do in front of any friend. Yeah, actually amazing with kids. I love kids
Yeah, and number two al magical
And his wife made me dinner with his kids. They did the I did the little what are they do?
With no, they just a regular handkerchief thing. Yeah, right. I did that whole thing
I put my utensils on the side, you know, cuz I went to etiquette school years ago
Did you really I did my mom my parents took through me through etiquette school. What happened?
I was in a ballroom. I did a ballroom dance thing all the dinner
No, though, in fact, there is an old article
They took a gigantic photo of me in the newspaper
San Diego Union of me ballroom dancing with a white one girl, you know, I mean and so I learned all that
So when al magical invited me because no one's ever introduced me to children. Yeah when he did it was it really meant a lot
Yeah, because he's like, you know, I was like, I love kids
Mm-hmm, and um, you know, so you know, maybe you and you guys can make me a dinner
I don't know. Sure. I would do that with your kids. Yeah, and I won't swear
I'll be all Christian about it on our patreon episode yesterday. He asked my ten-year-old niece if
She would kill anyone and for what reason now. I was like, well, I don't know if that's all right. Fuck it
Invitations
I'll send you some Uber. You know, but then they'll learn they're gonna learn one day about murder
Everyone does right?
No
It's a little Polly I was influenced by Polly, yeah
But listen, yes
You know, I couldn't you know, and it's so I'm so glad that you're here and I don't know why we haven't done this soon
I'll be honest. Yeah, I don't know why we didn't do this sooner because I feel like
You and I
Could do this for hours sparks will fly. I see the bags under your eyes, right?
They formed while we were
They did it wasn't here before they weren't here. No, his bags are strong
Because of him, you know me all the excess baggage just feeling, you know, emotional about you know, I mean some of the things
Yeah, right, but at the end of the day, I tell you another thing you did for me
Yeah, when I went to New York
You called Estee from the comedy cellar. Yep, and you said see Bobby Lee
You set up a showcase for me and she saw me on a Friday. I did good
Yeah, she passed me but like I can I would only go to someone like you for those kind of favors because I know that you'll
actually pull through for me and
At the end of the day
You could be in my top
Five of all time in comedy people. Can you go to your my space? Yes, my space page. Yeah, top of the top. Yeah
So, um, that you know, that's I do do want to throw that out
But next time you have a job and you think you want I should be in it. Yes, get me the job first and then tell me
Yes, I agree with that. I think that yeah, look and I agree with that. I think that there are things that I
Could have done better personally because I think when you're when you're given the opportunity to green light or whatever
You just reach out to people again. You have a deep affection for and go. Oh my god. I'd love to include you
But then the business comes into play with it. Yeah, you realize. Oh, it's not as easy as just I know
But I don't think that I'm and I'll be honest with it just to defend myself
I don't think I'm that tough of a cell
You are no joke. No because people have like, you know, I was on spilling up together this ABC show
I didn't test I didn't audition. They just gave it to me, right?
So I know how people in power feel about me. I've been in many situations like that. I just want to defend myself, right?
Yeah, so I you know, I'm just want to say that, you know, I don't think I'm a that big of a cell
So but I know that there are political things that I'm not privy to
That I'm not gonna take personally anymore and just I will do whatever with you
I would to the end of my life. If you want to do something with me, I'll fucking do it
I'll memorize my lines. I'll be on fuck. I'll show up and we'll do it
All right, and let's just bury the hatchet with everything. Okay. I don't ever want to say it again
Okay, in other podcasts. Yeah, we're ending it now whatever because there's a lot of purity. Yeah, goodness. Yeah, it comes from you
Yeah, I mean, I haven't talked about you at all, but you're the one that talks about me
But so when you're saying we bury the hatchet it you bear that
You bear it you do. Okay. Let me rephrase this the screen cap of the let me rephrase that you bear that and this is what it is
Okay. Yes. I you could have just let it go with that
I could have said we bury the hatchet, right? Yeah, and then we could have just moved on to the next thing, right?
Yeah, but then you had to add in right you bury it
I don't you bury the hatchet. I know whatever that's what it sounds like. Okay, but you bury the hatchet
Where where where have you ever been where you're like word on the street is Burns talking shit on like where's that?
No, because you have more of a rat pack style that has never happened
But I don't you're like Sebastian Meadowskull going that way. You guys have a like a real like huh?
No, I do I just keep to myself like right back like the rat pack like a team
Yeah, they're they don't you know me you don't rat your friends out, you know like a mafia stuff, right?
He has those things and I'm the guy that dies the five minutes
Right I get stabbed a thousand times by pencil
Just the first five minutes of the movie. That's how yeah, because I'm a talker. Yeah, I'm a coward, right?
But yeah, you know, you know, I'm okay. Yeah, but let's just bury it now
We I'll bury the hatchet. Okay, since you didn't know you don't have a hatchet
I'll bury the hatchet. Yeah, I'll bear for life. Okay, and then you and I can move on. Yes, right, but you know watch it
I'm not afraid to you know, you know, I love you though
That's why you're here. We you know, I love you. Listen, you have you do know that correct. Well, that's why you're in my fucking house
The fact that he does get especially triggered by you because I think he has a deeper love for you
Then he has for compared to other people because when he had you guys had that weird thing at the comedy store
You came back home crying. Yeah, and you don't cry about people. That's how hurt me. I'm not I'm not making it up
Right, right. Yeah, these are things that I
Get really down about right and I and I it really affects me. It hurts, right?
I suffer but to be fair it you shouldn't air it out on the podcast if that's true
Well, he's
Did you guys go on a friend moon to Israel? I want to hear. Oh, yeah. Oh, so then yeah
You did that for me too. Yeah
So Steve burn calls me and he goes you want to go to Israel to do shows he goes no man
I I got you a hookup. They'll fly you out
You know, you're gonna see all the sights for free
It's a free trip
And I went out saw the last temptation of Christ together
Yeah, we did years ago. Yeah, and when I got off for this thing they're like, yeah, do you know any other entertainers?
I'm like, huh. I was like, well, I remember crying with Bobby at the last
Because we were both like looking at each other but not like yeah
You're the one that I saw that with yeah, and then when that when the opportunity rose
I I thought of you immediately and reach out and that was that was a great trip
That was a great trip and I laughed so hard when
When you so we're at where I guess where Jesus fell there's like a like a
Like a where he died or whatever, right?
Which how the fuck do they know where yeah, you're right?
So I'm like, it's where Steve where Steve and Steve burn is on his hands and knees. Yeah with your hands on the slab
Yeah crying because of Jesus. Yeah, right and I was emotional. I know I never laughed
Come on really my fuck. Yeah, you don't remember I remember him. I mean, I remember you like I
Like crazy, but as someone that went to CCD was confirmed all the all the time to try to make fun of your yeah
I just found it to be humorous. That's all
Yeah, that was weird and then I remember going to the mud the Dead Sea Dead Sea with the mud that was fun
That was a great time and
We went with her J. Jamie Chung
She's so nice super Brian Brian Greenberg love him super nice
That was a great trip dude and then like um and then we would have dinners with like
Like heads of heads of state political. Yeah, and they would do speeches
Yeah, right and you're like, you know, you don't you know at the end of the day, you don't want to take a side
What not publicly not publicly on this town you know, I know Jews rule
Is that what you're saying? Excuse me?
But the thing is is that but there you almost cuz they flew you out. So I would say go. Yeah, you're right
Yeah, I mean like I was that douchebag. Yeah when I don't even believe what I'm saying really because they flew me out
Yeah, and then did you just remember the Instagram comments that we would because we had to post
Do updates on our social? Well, we didn't have to but they asked us to and then when you did it was like
I mean the comments were insane at least for me at the time, especially when we went over there was you know
There were heightened tensions between right yeah, yeah, there was a lot of
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Yeah
Yeah, I don't have a side when it comes to that but you did that for me and I really do appreciate it and
You know, I just um, we're very similar in many ways though
I'm not know the ways we live our lives
But you are very giving and you roll out the red carpet for a lot of people as well
It's not like a let's like each other, but you've you've got a lot of people you got me past the comedy store. Yeah
Sure look in the camera
Yeah
On the record. Yeah, you got you got me on addition with SD and that's when you know
That's when things in LA like actually felt
Nice for me where I was like oh you have a home as a comedian, right? I mean, yeah, so I do thank you for that as well
Yeah, but you know what you've always been somebody that is not it's not some like when even initially when you were like
Let's do a tour. You know, it's so a no-brainer to me
You know, you've always been that there's never a question of like
Yeah, but is you know, it's it's always just like oh, yeah for sure. He's obviously a talented guy
You know, I have to admit you're also a handsome kind of a guy when you're mixed with white very well
The white mixed in very well with you because they could go either way either way. Okay. Yeah, dude
His daughter is adorable you and commercials
No, I'm not a poacher, right? I've never uh
Posted anything or shown any pictures because it's like I don't know
It's like I'm not gonna knock people that post pictures the kids
I totally understand why you'd want to but yeah for me
It's like I I don't want to do that. It's like that's mine
Why but if but does she want to be in modeling or acting or anything like that?
I don't think so. I don't I mean she's still like figuring things if she ever said yeah
I'd have a conversation with her. Yeah, but you know, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna tell her you got to get some head shots
I'm gonna make some money off this mug. Yeah
Yeah, well don't force it. Yeah, I don't want to express it. I think she would work
But she's a you know, I mean got a really good look. Well, thank you. She's cute. Thank you. I
Know you're not being yeah, yeah
So we you're here you wanted to promote some things and let's talk about those things our friendship
That's pure. Yeah, and we did that already. We did it, but you
Um produced and directed a documentary. Yes, which you already talked about on this podcast
I have I talked about this podcast already amazing Jonathan. Yeah, but the amazing John. Okay, would you say about it?
Would I say about it? You just read his text message on air. Oh, yeah
And then you and then what'd you say afterwards? That's what I'm interested in
I don't think there's nothing negative
You were very smug about the fact that your response you gave him a one-word response. Thank you. Thank you for that
Is that accurate? Yeah, that's very accurate
When I when I was texting about this stuff, he's like I said hey
I texted you a few times
I just I'm trying to get the calendar like the schedule of all my friends podcast together and then and then you said
This is what you said to me. You go you go. Yeah, I didn't get back to you
I go why and you said you'll see you'll see and you were like doing a power trip on me
You were teaching you said you were teaching me a lesson. I think that's what you were saying
I said that night. You said I'm teaching you a lesson. Okay, okay
No, no, no, no hatches out. I
Buried it. It's on the road. It's unburied now. It's unburied. Yeah, I have it in my hand. It's all right
Let's go Friday the 13th on it. Okay. I'm gonna tell you what I want to say this
Okay, what I was just asking hey, I kind of know what day and time because everybody's
Schedule a dingaling
Whoa
50s fucking childhood fucking names now, okay ding dong, okay, listen up. Yes, Gallop
My body. Yeah, and you I used to say that about you then you started saying about yourself
So that is where's my writing credit for that? Yeah, you're gonna claim writing crap for like a one line a one line
I yell up. All right, so when I go up on stage, I'll go Steve Brun wrote that
Oh, okay, what do you want to say? What do you want to say? I
Forgot because I'm so emotional because I know you were teaching me a lesson. I wasn't teaching you a lesson
Here's the thing though. I'm a lack of communication. You're putting me in my place. What what does crystallia say about me?
Do you never text them back? Right? Yeah, what does anyone say about my my agents?
My agents after spilling it together got canceled two weeks ago
Mm-hmm have called me 30 times not one time if I called them back because I don't want to hear
Why do you do that? Because I don't want to hear gut. Hey pal
You know, we'll get you another thing. You'll be back on the horse. I don't want to hear any of that garbage, right?
I know what it is. It's political, right? I'm not small talkie. Mm-hmm, right?
So it's like, you know, um, I think that has a lot to do with it
You know, okay, and I would never of course you would be on this fucking podcast
We just had scheduling problems and that's why I said that bullshit, you know, he was as he was texting about
Scheduling look at you. Can't even you can't you're such a weasel
Scheduling problems. Okay. You had no schedule. The problem was you didn't know when I was scheduled. That's right
Yeah, so I was trying to figure out with everybody with Callan with the Segura with
Everybody yeah, Santino. It's like, okay, great great podcast group. By the way
Yeah, and I didn't want to miss out on this incredible. You would never miss out because can I say this?
Is we did an extra one for you today?
Okay, we did fucking two hours or somebody else, right?
And I did an extra one with you because I want to get it in the fucking bag, right?
So I don't have to wait a month when we had this opening. Yes. No, I'm being real. Thank you
We're gonna do this and this is gonna be we're gonna put more this whenever you want it out
We'll get this out. Okay. Okay, and we're gonna promote the fuck out of Johnny Johnny or whatever you fucking document every film
Whoever with the magic, right? We're gonna fucking promote several and sons too coming out on crime time
Yeah, okay, we're gonna promote all the stuff that you do all your shows. Yeah, your big live shows that you do
Okay, so are you happy you fucking?
Dingbat now check me check me out. Check me out. All right, right? Oh
It's buried again buried again. Wow the cask with a hatchet. You you insult me then you bury the head
Yeah, you dingbat and then you bear yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you love me or what I love you. Do you love me? Say it out loud. I
Want to hear it. I'm so glad this is all happening. Why cuz I feel like I can never explain how he treats me as a human being
And then now it's all
I am just as confused as you as his partner
Yeah, and I think that sometimes you can't tackle Bobby with reason or rationale
Yes, you just sort of have to play his game a little bit and play into the psychosis to get a little bit back
But here's the good news. You're a 10 and you can leave him at any time. I
Don't wanna I he has yeah baited in so hard. Oh, yeah. Yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah, look
Oh
You're a Korean five
And you're an LA three
Yeah
It's so funny that you say that because here another sexy handsome comic
We're shaming a fat gook
You want to try them in is that what you want to do? Is that feel good because I'm gonna say this to you my friend
All right, you can pretend you're white all you want, but you've got Korean inside you. I met your mom
I when do I pretend I'm white? All right. I met your mom. Yeah, she's full-blown
100% full-blown. Yeah, like she has AIDS. Okay. He has full-blown Korean. Yes. She's affected. But yeah, and she's dying from it
She needs to be a get the medicine. Okay, but your mom is Korean. Yes. She has the accent. Yeah, she's Korean. I know
She has she smells like kimchi jjigae. Yeah, right. You know what kimchi jjigae is, right? Yeah, it's what's stuck in your belly button
Fuck you. Oh, there comes the hatchet. Here comes the hatchet
No more no more this is so you know why because when I did your podcast this never happened
What we're doing now I was polite to you. No, this is what I love
This I he is a magic. He likes a little drama is what it comes down to. Yeah, and he likes to
Confuse you so much into submission
Like he wants to just sort of this is his style where he'll go in and hurt you
But retract go in retract that you're so confused about how you feel that you end up saying sorry
Let's get coffee after this
I agree
Yeah, I'm so glad this is all coming out. But you know what?
Doesn't it make me a snowflake?
It makes me doesn't it make me the thing about gilbert be on my side for a while. Okay. Yeah gilbert. Doesn't it make me special?
No, you're like hail
A snowflake is soft. It's all right. Right watch it come on hail hits you in the head right curious and then it melts
Oh, I saw something to defend me, please you're unique
Like that's it. That's all you got. That's all you got
Because I'm also confused. I also don't know if you like me or no
I'm so confused. All right. Let's just throw this out there and let's get this out of the way. Okay
And I'm you're right
Everyone's right. I have issues
And I don't you don't think when I'm saying certain things I'm going. Why are you saying that?
You mean don't call that fat guy a fat guy or whatever
Right. I have those things on my head. Don't poke his belly. You don't know him
I've poked fat guys in the belly before. Right. I've called um
Anyway, I can
Okay, yeah, go ahead with with what you're dispelling right now, right? You're you're unpacking emotionally for us right now
And we're we're acknowledging some things. Do you understand now why I think
Ken in the past has felt the way he has what I felt in the past the way I have but I think I have a
Good report and then there are things that you put in your head per
What you believe about other people and I just don't think it's okay. You're right
You're right and that's I'm not that when you said that earlier
It wasn't something that I was confused about it's 100% shit that I do right. I know this because you know, I've
I've been in recovery. I've done steps. I know, you know that I imagine
90% of my problems even probably even more. Yeah, but I also do know when things
are a little awry and and I'm being
People are putting shade on me. Right. Right. Yeah, I'm not dumb in that way, right?
But and I and I and I want to say this to you is is that um
Yeah, I do imagine a lot of stuff, but some of it
And even though I didn't you know mean
Push from my point of view during what your your side of the story. Right, right?
I still believe in some of my side
Do you understand? Do you understand? But I do know that about me that I
Did I I'm a weird guy. I um, you know, I
I create problems in my head
But a lot of these things
Not even a lot, but everybody's got their own foils. I mean, I definitely I think I think, you know, you look
You just try to do your best representation of yourself. I think all the time and I think that what's even more difficult
Is just this environment this industry it is difficult to
I think at times
Stay positive and and and walk towards the light
You know because we all had our hiccups. We've all had our setbacks and stuff
But I think you just try to do your best, right? And I think that with him his heart doesn't match his hands
His heart doesn't match his mouth. I know that deep down
He is one of the most loving most generous most kind-hearted people I've ever met
He just does matches mouth though his stomach matches his mouth. Yeah, that's but his every everything else. He just
He's very uh reckless
Reckless is a good word. It's a beautiful word and the word of the the podcast reckless
Right, right. I agree though. Yeah, I he yes
But these are things
That are truthful what i'm about to say
Is is that I know this is that I have helped
People for sure in the past. Yeah, and I can not that I help people to get anything returned
But I do know that none of those people
Would ever do the same for me
Right. So what I'm saying is is that those things I'm not imagining because they're facts
The minute and we haven't announced anything yet, obviously, but the minute I got this next thing
Who is the first person I called? What is it? I told you that?
Yeah, okay, but the reason why I'm in this next thing is so-and-so has nothing to do with it
What
Let it absorb
It's so-and-so has nothing to VV. No, that's not true. Does he have something to do with it? No, that's why I'm in it
No, but that's see how my head goes there though
That's why I'm giving this up. I think your head goes to
A lot of places. Okay, but um, I don't and I love your forehead. I understand. Thank you. It's welcome. Yes
Anything else? So this Jonathan, let's go to the let's promote your job. It's the amazing job. You've already promoted
And I know but you what is it on so it is available now on youtube on the all things comedy channel
and it's just
I know how much you love documentaries love them. So you should watch this going to I sent you the link you didn't watch it
so
This is a documentary the amazing Jonathan
Great comedian magician game of thrones like five finalists coming. Oh, I'll watch this. It's the burn document
I'm gonna come on man. There's things going on. I'll watch it
I watch season one of animal practice
Okay, you fucking
You and the little monkey
Thank you in the commercial. This is what I love. I love when this happens. Okay, so
Jonathan vegas headliner one of the first guys to pop off comedy central
um
Like the freddy kruger of comedy and magic. He's just a rock star, right?
Five years ago. He was given a terminal diagnosis. He's diagnosed with cardiomyopathy
And told he has a year to live so he retires from performing. He retires from the stage
You combine cardiomyopathy with drug addiction and diabetes and the doctors say you have a year to live get your affairs in order
And Jonathan does he retires?
He outlives expectations and decides i'm going to make a return to stage and see if I still have it if I can still perform
So I thought what a great impetus into a documentary to to to go through his legacy and his career
And to see if he can still do it
but
Jonathan was one of the first guys ever featured for on the road and I know his
Old road manager Joel Osborne while Jonathan was touring the the world and popular in Australia, for example
Outside the door was this 12 year old kid who saw his show and was enamored with him
And every year he'd come back the kid would be backstage. Can you sign this? Can you sign this 14 15 16?
And then eventually Jonathan gave him like a responsibility. Hey, I got a
I have a tour here. You want to manage the tour while i'm in Australia? Yeah, yeah, of course
Joel turns 18
He says do you want to come to the united states america and be my road manager? Joel says absolutely
And from there
It's like rick and morty. I mean these two should not be in each other's lives
But for there's this fraternal relationship that develops between them
And again, Jonathan's drug addict suicide attempt all this crazy shit that he put Joel through and Joel kept him on track
And basically kept him alive
Wow, Joel gets Jonathan's life on track post this awful divorce gets him in a good place
Goes to Australia becomes a comedian on his own
And then when Jonathan makes a return to stage Joel comes back to open form
So it's this wonderful kind of heartwarming documentary about you have all that on there. It's all in there
Oh my god now and that's amazing and you produced it right produced directed it
Oh my god, all the archival footage and stuff and it's it's truly like a love letter to his legacy to his career
To all the great bits that he's done, but also to just an unorthodox relationship that I think
I don't know. It's nice to get away from the tv and watch something. I think positive that yeah from politics
How is Jonathan doing now?
You know, he I think he has his good days and he's got his bad days. He's still with us, right?
He's still with us. Good. Um, and I hope I hope to god. He's with us for a long time
But you know, I just don't know. I don't know how much longer. Yeah
Yeah, it's so funny because there's a lot of guys like that in comedy that like
um
Even the guys that didn't make it as big as amazing Jonathan that like influenced me who I love sure, right?
And um, I like the fact that you open for this guy
Right back in the day. Yeah, and you're paying it forward, but it's also a really cool
Um story. It's sad, right? But yeah, but with a happy end. Yeah, it's a happy ending. Yeah. Wow. That's really cool, man
Um, I will watch it. Yeah, I didn't know I thought it was literally just about here's, you know, him on the tonight show
And then here he is in smashing a pumpkin with Gallagher and I'm like, uh, I don't know
You know, I mean, I didn't know it was that that's cool. Yeah, I I you know the reception we've we played at a few festivals
We won a few best docs and stuff. Oh, wow
But I think when you're in the business side of things and you're allotted the decision to you know, see a
A nominal return on your on the money spent or the visibility and hopefully people seeing it
My decision was I want as many people to see this as possible, especially for Joel and Jonathan
I it's just uh, I don't know. So listen up everyone. Everyone listening on it. Honestly, though
I know this this podcast has been I I love it, but um, you know, crack, you know, and we done all this stuff
Really little hatchets all that stuff, right?
But I sort of fucking got at the end of the day
Hey, this dude right here is family and he's my brother and um
He's also you're very proactive
That's so inspirational
You're just constantly doing shit, dude
And you know, I'm the laziest guy everyone knows but um, you know, I wish I could have some of your you know, but um, you work all the time
But listen
Everyone listening right now get the documentary watch it support it because it's a great idea
The amazing Jonathan is a legend. Yeah, right. He really is because he infused, you know how sometimes magicians
Yeah, no, you're right magicians are just magicians, right? Yeah, and then they do comedy, but it's not funny
Yeah, it's like corny. Yeah, they have one-liners, right?
Um, but the amazing Jonathan, I remember watching him going. Oh, this guy's funny
like he's genuinely like
Gutteral funny, you know, he says he's a better comedian than he is a magician
Yeah, but then we like interviewed copperfield and you know, pen Gillette. So there's like real experts
You know dissecting his act and telling you exactly what is copperfield skin look like
I'll tell you what he's a beautiful man
Like I like I was sitting next to him was like, man, that's what it's like to be a billionaire
Like you just he looks wealthy. He looks like a billionaire
Right the tan probably right is nice. He just looks great. Right like Jeff Goldblum
Yeah, you have a recent obsession with Jeff Goldblum. I've been I've been googling his images. Yeah
And it's weird if you look at my google history
Every other one is Jeff Goldblum and like Hawaiian shirts deep v's. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah
Hosing on top of because Kevin Christie Kevin Christie
About six months ago was talking about Jeff Goldblum about his style. Okay, that guy. No, he's the best stuff for his age
He's just a really good looking for you know, you know, this and that
And I go, well, I'm not gay. That's crazy. I look at it. I looked at it and I've been looking at everything
For six months. Yeah, I Google half a year. I think that he is right before you got here
Well, yeah, but yeah, he was he was dude. Let me say something
It he is a good actor great actor. Yeah, right
But he's stylish as fuck bro
Because of his frame. Yeah, he can wear like longer stuff, right that I would look shitty in
Right like button-ups that I can't wear and he's kind of Mediterranean looking. I don't know what is he Jew?
I don't know what he is, but he's definitely yeah, he's got a Mediterranean vibe to him. He's also with um
He could have been adopted. I don't know, but he also um is always with younger women. I mean, that's his vibe
Yeah, right. There's just something magical about him. Um, I'm not gay
I'm and and um, even if I did like I'm not gay. I was jerking off the fly
In his Hyundai Santa Fe guys, I'm not gay the fly to even if I was on the fly to yeah
And he was like, hey man, let's cuddle it up or whatever. I'll be a nabra
Well, you know, Kevin Christie did our poster art for Amazing Jonathan for always wow
I think Kevin's a phenomenal. I mean, obviously he's posting his artwork. He's phenomenal
He did my third hour special champion. He painted that um thing and then for always amazing
I got so much his artwork. I mean, dude, I am
I'm number one Kevin Christie. I
I'm the one that got him into comedy
Really?
I did an ampm commercial
Okay, yeah, and um, it was four guys walking into an ampm
And Kevin was the leader of the four guys and I was in the four guys. We just walk into an ampm. We we spent a browse
That's such an alpha kind of group
Oh my god, and then the and the guy behind the counter was the alpha male. Yeah, and we were the nerds. Yeah, okay
But then when we were but then I ran into him at amoeba and he goes, let me come
Check out your comedy. So he came to the comedy store
And then it took him a year. Yeah, and he finally called me and he goes
I want to try it
So we set it all up put him on open mic on this and that and he opened for me
Oh, that's awesome. Yeah, he's that guy on twitter by the way. He's one of the best that I like on twitter too
And also secondly, he did the kings of leons one of the first ever the guy's a legitimate artist
He's a great stand-up. And here's the last thing that he can do. He can act as fucking ass off. Yeah
He's a great actor. This kid is everything. Yeah
Every he has everything this kid look up Kevin Christie if you don't follow Steve burn at Steve burn
Follow him all that Steve burn live. Whatever
Steve burn live check it out. Okay. Yeah, and you know what and I can also tell Steve. Yeah, I can tell
that
That you will be on this podcast soon sooner than you think
I can I can tell that there's a little bit of the spark here
And I'm not saying that we're like, uh, there's anything sexual going on
Yeah, and here's another thing that you get you get really homophobic with me
No, Bobby, you that's another thing that I wanted to mention. That's right
Hold on. When I go to the comedy star, right? And I want to you
Do you think you've never given me reason to be weird around you? No, no, no, no
I want to remember the punchline what you did
What'd you do the punchline?
Oh, should I tell you what it was? Yes?
And then I'll defend myself go ahead and then you wonder why yeah, go ahead. So I finished my set
I what I don't know if you the punchline green room is very tiny. It's tight
Okay, yeah cover your eyes because you know what you did. Did you just realize I walked I didn't realize
I open the door, right?
I open the door and I walk in and nobody's in and then all of a sudden I hear the door shut
He was hiding behind the door. I just hear it shut. I turn around. I'm scared
And you're standing there naked
You're standing there butt naked you go
Korean hello, you go hug Korean hello. Yes, I go get away from me hug
I wanted to fuck away from me hug and you keep coming towards me and I was kicking you
I remember that now. Yeah, right. Yeah. Now. Let me say something. Okay, and when you hug me
You push in
You used to push in you do you remember that the pelvis push? Yeah
I apologize
Oh, you know what I apologize. You know what those kind of behaviors
It doesn't not being real. It doesn't are you being real? Yeah, okay
This is it right with me and when you say I was gonna make some sort of funny comeback
Yeah, or this who I am this and that, you know when I hear it just now. Yeah, you know, I'm sorry
Bobby I was laughing at the time and I do think it's there we go. That's what I want. Oh
All right, wow
Fuck yourself. Reverse. It's the cat. My podcast. We do a fucking you do an e. Fuck you. Fuck you. You back off gook
Can we yeah, what uh one patreon question really? Oh, yeah, go ahead. This is from Henry Gonzalez from patreon
Hola, this is a question for steve bill the ball. What's the fun?
Very good. What's the fondest memory from the kim's of comedy tour? I know a lot of drama fondest memory
I know what it is. I have it of the kawaii
I remember we did kim's in san jose
and I remember when
The all the shows were completely sold out. Yep, and I remember you me and ken
Because the green room was on the second floor and you can climb out the window to see the line
Yeah, and I remember
Seeing the line. I've never seen that line. Like, you know, dad fan
Is at that club and he he goes look at me. I sold out
It'll go with his camera through the audience when they're waiting in line and I want to yell it's papered
Yeah, I don't come I don't do bring her but anyway, um, he's a fantastic talent. You should watch his albums great guy
But anyway, we were up there it go. I know I should let it go. Yeah, and we were up there
Oh speed has something. Okay. Yeah
What there's no letting go
Okay, thank you so much, but I remember standing there with you and ken
And observing the line. Yeah feeling a sense of like because that was the first time
I used to open up for a bigger comic. You know, you've opened up for people
But that was the first time where I said to myself
Wow this many people and we did it. I remember we were hugging each other. We did hug each other. Yeah on that on that
We were out on the terrace. Yeah, we're looking
We were so excited because it was like the first time any of us
I think we're on a bill where we saw a line around the block and
Yeah, that was that was pretty awesome. I gotta tell you it's like those little memories you gotta hold on to
And I'm gonna say this last thing. Yeah, is that
I know you'll never do it. Yeah, I know ken will never do it
But if you think about it, we should try one more
One more kim's now I would with this podcast. Yeah, right
Dude
My the people that listen to this are diehards. Yeah, right
With this with your success ken's success, right? We try one
See what happens. Would you add one more person? Here's no
And I'll make you a deal right now, right? If ken wants more money, yeah, I owe it to him
He can take more. I agree with that, right?
And if you want more money, you can you can do more. I would I know my place. I know
I know my stock. Yeah, but there's no denying that ken is
Yeah, you know, yeah a phenomenal draw. Yeah, he's a big draw for sure. So if you want to do that
Not knocking you because I'm not I'm not taking it personally dude. I'm not I'm not doing any of that
I just I'm the one that brought it up. I know I would be bronze on that olympic platform. So I know
Yeah, um for now. I came close though as gold, but I'm silver
very close though
No, but I would you know tell ken, you know can't tell ken
And next time you see him because I know your buddy buddy with him
Um, and I am too every time I see him. I love him. Yeah, he's the best
But I don't want to artwork we have all the um, um
Frame pictures he has of you guys together from kim's a comedy around the house. Yeah, I wanted one of the bathroom in the hall
There's one here big photo big giant. I have our first from the wiltern
I have that frame. Oh, you do and I have the one from uh, las vegas. Wow
With the with the ticket I have that frame in my house too
Is that it unhelpful advice? Yes. Oh, is there another a question?
Yeah, this is a question from a fan now unhelpful advice with bobby kalima and steve bird. Did you just do that? Oh, it's a modulator
No, that's my voice. Holy shit. This kid right here. I don't say I want to say right now this kid right here
Yeah, yeah, Chicago second city. Not only that I told him I was crazy. I told him to do open for me
Well, he never done stand up before. Yeah, I'm not kidding you
He rocked the house. He never done it before. Yeah, this guy is a natural
But he won't do it because he wants he wants to be on a tv show and an audition
Go ahead
Dear bobby kalila and steve. My name is said drick from france. I'm 20 years old and I live in belgium
In november 2018 my younger sister did a suicide attempt
She survived and is doing well physically but mentally is a different story ever since it happened. I quit my job
I feel no emotion unless i'm drunk. I have no energy for daily stuff
And my place is a mess and I slept for 12 hours straight
It just seems like I can't be happy unless the people I love are my question is
How do I get my life back on track and feel human again?
Said drick greetings from belgium
It's heavy. That's the heaviest one
We've ever gotten. I think the great news is the acknowledgement
You know that I think that's a step
I would I would assume i'm not obviously i'm not a professional
But I I assume that the outreach of help should be something positive that said drick can take saying
I'm at least acknowledging what's going on and i'm reaching out
For help and I think that that's a good sign
But I think maybe I also I also think you should put the oxygen mask on yourself first before trying to help other people
um, I think such a general rule of life also
Because we have the tendency as humans when we love so deeply to give so much of ourselves to them that we only leave scraps for
Ourself and I think that's probably what's happening. He's been so emotionally invested in his sister's well-being that he's given
Just scraps to himself. So I think that he needs to focus on him getting better putting the blinders on
and
Only then he'll be able to finally get his sister to maybe you know, lead her in the right direction
It it's not as bad, but it kind of reminds me of when I was I got sober that
Second time
And my brother was sober that but when I relapsed he had to relapse and so when I got sober sober the second time
My brother was still using
Right and he was out there for a couple years
just partying, you know
and um
I'd go to his house and there would be like meth heads and like like street people like homeless people living in his house
was crazy
and um
You know, obviously this is far worse as his sister, you know tried to take her online. It's I'm so sorry
but eventually you just have to
You know, it's a tough love is a different difficult thing to say. Um
You kind of have to just you know, like she said
Live for your you come first
You have your and both of you have to see seek therapy
That's the bottom line. You need to seek professional help if both of you are feeling this blue
day in and day out, you know when um
Not to get even more grim, but when I was 17, I had a massive suicide attempt
I was locked up for a month. My sister was in college. She was depressed
She couldn't pick up her own pieces because her and I were extremely close and to even think
I wrote her a suicide. It was a whole thing. I wrote her a letter everything. Um
but
Because she was so strong right and she was she really was able to
pick me up in her own way and
If it wasn't for the fact that she really
You know hammered down on her own health and her own stability
I don't think I would have been able to
Go to her for support, right? She wouldn't have been able to offer as much support as she was as she was able to do at that time
So get healthy. Yeah first you can't help anyone unless you get healthy
That's great that you're back on
On better ground. I assume right now better. Yeah. Yeah, that's that's when I was 17
I was just a you know hormonal teenager. My father was dying
There were so many circumstantial things that were happening in my life. Yeah, so and I I had no real guidance at that time
I was just left to my own devices
And so I just became a suicidal
Teenager and I was severely depressed. I was in and out of meds. No one told me that I couldn't just abruptly stop my meds
I just didn't have that guidance. Sure. And so it became just a recipe for disaster
Um, but thankfully my sister who's almost two years older than me. She really had it together
Yeah, and it seems like they have a similar age gap too
So if you think you're that that person in her life then
Then focus on yourself first before you you you reach out to her. Well, thank god, you know
He's getting the answer from you. I mean, I don't know if that's the right answer, but that's what you got through it
So I'm sure
Let's have you look at see why aren't you on bury a hatchet or two?
What happened? I don't know. I just I got really emotional
I fell for this once
He's gonna reverse reverse hatching very good right now you're learning
How to on how to on shut the fuck up. Fuck you. Fuck you. Okay. All right
Thanks for the car
And you want money for the osases?
The great Japan
Oasis. Yeah, so you literally fake cried
I would go be into a reaction
Earlier in the show. Yeah
It's fucked up. Did you watch the oasis documentary loved it? I love it. Yeah, Liam Gallagher's comes out this week
one on him
I loved it. Yeah, I'm excited for that and that's when I felt guilty watching it throwing your fucking CDs because I remember being on the freeway
Yeah, throwing it out on the spot. You know what in fact when we watched the documentary a couple times
He was like, wow, I feel really bad
I'm being real. Yeah. Well, thank you. Thank you for communicating that because
I didn't know much about them, you know, because they were such a big radio
I don't like, you know popular music. Yeah, but then watching the documentary
I just fell in love with them. They're talented guys brothers and whatever. Yeah, and I did feel guilty
So I apologize if you ever want the city's back. I don't know. I can buy you a lot of them. No, it's okay. Thank you
but anyway, um
We have a dvd that the kings of comedy. Can people get that ever?
It's on voodoo actually. Oh, it's on voodoo.com. Oh, really? Really? I don't think it's on amazon. You could still buy it. Yeah, yeah
So that was a long time ago kings of comedy. You watch it if you want me, ken, steve
and kevin shower
What's what have you talked to kevin shay? I haven't talked to kevin for a bit. I know he opens for ken
Oh, I know that on the road. Yeah, okay. Good. But I love kev. He's great. I haven't seen him for a bit. Wonderful. Didn't you?
He pushed me
I forgot I forgot didn't suddenly get body slam that day or he bought it
We were there when he body slammed me, right? It was a photo shoot. Yeah, I remember like double double like takedown
And he slammed me on my back and I got knocked unconscious. I was getting water
Oh, I was getting water at the time and it came back and no one was talking. Yeah, that's kind of fucking bullshit
That kid used to do like what the fuck just happened. Yeah. Yeah, what happened? There should be a tv show about
The four of you guys on the road together. What happened? I mean, that is a great idea. I was just getting body slammed
I had a photo and you jerking off in his backseat
Yeah, there was a lot of fucking things. So why did he body slam me though? I don't know a lot. You don't know
No, he especially
Out of everyone that that was involved in that fucking thing. Okay has the deepest seated resentment
Because he's come up to me before that guy and I don't I don't care if I talk about him because he's done this shit
Okay, you know, I was at the Irvine improv. Okay with
You know, Frank, I'm sitting there. You know eating without eating but like friends hanging out
Yeah, and he's walked up to him and go, hey, what does it feel like being a complete loser and Ken is a big star and you're nothing
No, yeah
So one time I walked to him in the showroom. He was drunk
And I go, hey, um, I know you've done that twice now. Yeah, don't ever do that again
Yeah, he pushed me in the showroom
He shoved me away. Oh and I follow him outside, right? Right and I'm like come here. Where you going?
Let's talk it out. He's like, fuck you. You know, I need left and that's the last time
I've seen him. I saw him one time at the 6th street cafe blue. I was eating at that Sanong Dang
And he walked out with pk out of that bar
Yeah
And and because come over I go no because that fuck and then and then kevin shea goes
Come here, man. Let's talk it out now. I go. Fuck you
Anyway, Steve Byrne give him a round of applause everybody
Everybody give him a round of applause
You're fucking fantastic stuff, man. Take out the amazing Jonathan documentary. I got the follow one Steve Byrne live
and
Check it all out download download
All right, we'll be back with some housekeeping. That's it. Yeah, that was crazy
Hey guys that episode was insane
uh, so insane that we forgot to uh, record housekeeping right after because we were still laughing and uh
Talking right after we recorded. So it's just me right now
In a phone booth in the middle of Pasadena recording this and once again if you want to
Have us in your life a little bit extra throughout the week
Make sure you check out our patreon.com slash tiger belly. We talk all sorts of stuff there
We typically record in the late afternoon when bobby's waking up. So it gets pretty volatile
So that's always fun for everyone
Uh bobbing clouds recording their bed, which are really really fun and we actually just put one out recently this week
Which is awesome. So check that out. Once again, that is patreon.com slash tiger belly and
Excuse me. Thanks to everyone who wrote us an itunes review this week this week. You helped us get to top 30
So we beat some people but uh, let's try to get to the top 15
That's our goal next month getting to top 15. So please if you haven't yet
Uh write us a review on itunes and give us five stars. And once again, if you would like to send us any questions for unhelpful advice
Our new email is adviceunhelpful at gmail.com
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And uh, yeah
Have a good night
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