TigerBelly - Episode 30: George Has A Pink Dick

Episode Date: February 24, 2016

Bobo has a nightmare audition. Khalyla gives Pacman a pass... sort of. Gilbo is triggered to tears. We talk radioactive watermelons, a butterfinger stash, and why Maurice hates Asians.   Rec...orded February 22, 2016 Music by Bobby Lee Instagram: @tigerbelly Twitter: @thetigerbelly www.thetigerbelly.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Transcript
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Starting point is 00:00:00 You're listening ad-free on Wondery Plus. Welcome to Tiger Belly. My name is Bob. We got Kalayla. We got Gilbert. Gilbert. I first want to start off by saying thank you for my fans and our fans from Chicago that came to the show. I enjoy meeting you. I enjoy touching you. I enjoy hugging you and I enjoy all of it.
Starting point is 00:00:52 I also want to have a little conversation with Gilbert here. You just said to me, thank you for being nice to my family. So what do you mean by that? A lot of them came out. Some came Friday. I think some came Sunday. What do you think I was going to do? You said you were worried that I was going to say something to them. Not really worried. No, you said that. So what would I say?
Starting point is 00:01:14 Hey, are you Gilbert's uncle? Yeah, your nephew sucks dick. Yeah, but can I just say something? Can I just say something to you? I got class, baby. I got intuition and I've got a morality. Why would I fucking do that? I don't know.
Starting point is 00:01:31 I'm not going to expose them to your heathen behavior. Why would I go to your uncle and go, I think Gilbert sucks penis, but FYI, you know what I mean? That's on the down low. It's on the deal. Yeah, I would never do that. Even though you do do that. Speaking of sucking dick. I'm not done yet.
Starting point is 00:01:54 You can do your notes in a second. I don't have notes. I just want to say this. I've been on the road two weeks in a row. I went to Houston and then went to Chicago and Kalyla and Gilbert are spending a lot of time. When I'm on the road behind my back, George too is involved. All right. So let me look at, look at me right now, George, right now.
Starting point is 00:02:14 All right. Are you fucking my girlfriend behind my sly? Would you say I should sly? Yeah. Be on my back. George, look at me. Okay. Look at me right now.
Starting point is 00:02:25 You fucking Filipino gook. I love you. I love you too, man. But don't do it. Don't do it. I can't. You can't do it. I can never do it.
Starting point is 00:02:33 Let me just say, if you do, I can never do it. If you do, look, I can never do it. He's been begging Jessica. Your rap. Hey, don't reveal that either. Okay. That's on the deal. She's been telling me.
Starting point is 00:02:43 It's on my Snapchat. That you want Jessica. My girlfriend. I'll say that sly wife. My girlfriend's best friend. You've been asking her. I've been asking her if you could eat her boho. Blatantly, too.
Starting point is 00:02:53 Blatantly. Like that. You know what I mean? I like your moves. Yep. You told me to be up front. That's very good. That was very good.
Starting point is 00:03:01 Tell me to be up front. I like your persistence. I'm just saying. But no, I'm not trying to have sex with Kalayo. I'm just saying, I just want to throw it out there. Okay. I'm just saying George, look at me right now. He's just pretending to fix the camera.
Starting point is 00:03:12 You're nervous. If you do, there's going to be wrath coming your way. I trust my girlfriend. You would never do that. You ask these boys as if I'm just an ornament in the room with no emotions. You do have emotions, but you are an ornament. You just got Bobby lead. Also, last thing I want to say before you go to your notes.
Starting point is 00:03:33 OK. All right. You say notes. I know that empty page. Thank you for your tweets about love. I'm only in three scenes. So good. You didn't see it. You fucked. Oh, watch the whole thing. All right. So did I. So I love that show. I'm in three or four scenes second season.
Starting point is 00:03:49 I have one episode for sure that's revolving around my character. And I'm very, I'm very, very grateful for your positive responses. Papa doesn't work much, but when Hollywood, you know what I mean? It says you can do a little bit of things. You know, it makes me feel like I'm kind of relevant. But my main goal is this podcast. My main goal, you know, me right now is this whole thing. Sweetie, this podcast is not going to get you paid.
Starting point is 00:04:17 I know that. But you know what? I feel good about doing it. And can I say this when people come to me after the show and they say, I love Tiger Belly, it makes me feel very, very good. We should have a new rule. You only take photographs after your show with podcast fans. How do we do that, though? I mean, they're obviously very vocal, right?
Starting point is 00:04:36 Yeah. So if they come up to you and they say, hey, like, love the podcast and you do get that type of feedback, then I think that they should be rewarded because they I feel, I mean, the fans are family. They know so much more about you than your, you know, run of the mill, you know, person who's going to walk into comedy comedy club. They're they're such a part of of you. OK, so they're the recipient of all the stories Chicago at two shows Saturday sold out 500 people a show.
Starting point is 00:05:08 OK, so at the end of the show, I say this. Thanks for coming out for paying, you know, your hard-earned money to come and say to come see me. But guess what? Only the podcast people get photos. No. Yeah. No. What do I say? And there I mean, it's obvious who they are.
Starting point is 00:05:30 If you guys are listeners of this podcast, we should have like a code word where if you if you pass Bobby in the hallway or if he Bobby's lingering outside and you say something, it should be a word. But I got it. A sentence. Gook, gook. No, nothing. That's what we can't have people just running around a theater saying this is. I'm going to say this sentence and it's a fact. And the person in this room can deny it.
Starting point is 00:05:52 Oh, it's a fact. OK. George has a pink dick. Oh, that's a good look at me right now, friend. Look at me right now, friend, my white friend. OK. You don't know that for sure. Your arms are pink. Your face is pink. What if he had like a really big black dick, though?
Starting point is 00:06:10 Oh, wow. He is Nordic. So yeah, weird experiments over there. George has a pink dick. I think that's the first. OK, if you go to any of Bobby Lee shows and you say George has a pink dick, you get to have a photo shoot with him. Yeah. Oh, my God. That's great. Yeah, that's a privilege.
Starting point is 00:06:26 It's a privilege. Yeah. But you have to say it just like that. George has a pink dick. Yeah. George, look at me right now, man. Do you have a pink dick? Yes. OK, good. That's all I wanted to hear, you know? What's going on with you guys this week?
Starting point is 00:06:41 Me, nothing. I was I wanted to talk about your meltdown last week. What meltdown? I saw a picture on Twitter of your your penis. No, what? No, he took that down. That that that had something to do with the meltdown. But, you know, take us through your meltdown last week. What happened last week?
Starting point is 00:06:59 You had not I can't name names, but. Get a big audition. I put a big audition for a show and I had a fully memorized. I had a fully worked, you know, man. And I go to Universal. And the star, the producer is a star. Big star, big star.
Starting point is 00:07:22 Household name, household name. And I walk in and I have it all prepared. And all of a sudden this person says hello to me in the room. And she starts introducing me to people in the room. That's if you guys are like friends. Yeah. And then each other, right? Or no. Yeah, I do. OK. But not much.
Starting point is 00:07:40 I mean, I respect this person. I look up to this person, but I'm intimidated by this person. And I had the worst audition you could ever have in your life to the point where as I walked out of the room, I literally started crying. And then I took a bottle of water that I had. I started banging my head, you know what I mean? I was so crazy.
Starting point is 00:08:04 What happened? So you had it all prepared. I was there the night or I was with you up until that morning. We had, you know, the lines down. What got in the way? Did you did you did your excitement of her acknowledging you cloud your short term memory? Yes.
Starting point is 00:08:24 I don't know what happened. But let me tell you this right now. You will never happen again. That's I'll tell you why. Why? Because I'm not going to go out again. That was his last. Retirement episode. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:08:42 I probably this pilot season, I think, done with that because, you know what? I think for right now, the little things I'm doing on love is enough. And the shit that I'm getting sent out for isn't right. And it's like, it's like, you know, they're just trying to throw me into any situation because my agents are scared that like, I'm going to get like complained. Like I'm not getting any traction.
Starting point is 00:09:05 Right. But at the same time, I'm a fat, midget go cool. I think I'm very funny. I believe that, you know, and people believe that I'm funny, but I'm not going to be forced like, you know, how about you play the head of the FBI? I get auditions like that. And I'm like, what the fuck?
Starting point is 00:09:25 I'm not going to get that. Mm hmm. You mean you're a strong man in a circus. No one's going to make you audition. Yeah. A strong man. Yeah. And they give you a piece of metal and then I'm like there.
Starting point is 00:09:37 I could pretend to bend it. I could. Yeah. Even if I pretend, even if I do it, no one's going to believe that I can do this. You know, so it's like, you know, I, the one audition I had that was actually good was written kind of for me. Which was I'm going to tell what it is.
Starting point is 00:09:54 But it was a role that I go, oh, this is like something that is in the realm of possibility. Your wheelhouse. Yeah. But you know what I mean? They're just throwing me out there and it's like, fuck it. It's like, I don't really need to do a three camera sitcom right now.
Starting point is 00:10:09 Why don't we just create Bobby? Let's create stuff. Let's create, you know, a perfect role for you. Yeah. Where people with who tell stories on a podcast, absurd stories, it is, we can write. How about a three camera sitcom? Me, you and Gilbert, right?
Starting point is 00:10:26 But it's the human centipede, right? George is a scientist. George is a scientist, right? And I want to be the middle. Yeah, because the thing is that I'm the front. You're the front. So my mouth is tied to your butthole. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:42 Guys, okay, I have a question. This movie has already been made. So like what about this centipede is different? I'm going to tell you right. I'm going to just, baby. Okay. You're the caboose. You're the back.
Starting point is 00:10:51 And the reason why I want to be the middle is so that I don't have to have any lines. And the only one that talks is George. I mean, now, Gilbert, Gilbert, you have all the lines, but you keep muffling in my butt. I know they'll do that. All I can do is right. And then if I have to poop, I go, and then you go, you have to eat it. So I base, I'm the shitter.
Starting point is 00:11:14 I'm the shitter. Let's pitch it to what network is this Fox? All of it. Oh my God. Let's go all of them. What kind of the sense of the human centipede? Yeah. And it's like, you only talk, we just walk around the house.
Starting point is 00:11:27 Right. But maybe it's still like sitcomy scenarios. Like, yeah, we get the client, the, the, the, the laughs, the live audience. Yeah. Oh, that's fascinating. So what do you think? I'm down. Have you actually pitched a show network for yourself?
Starting point is 00:11:40 Oh yeah, I've had deals before. And I, what my very first pitch, I'm going to tell you this one, this is so ridiculous. So I went in and I, um, I thought this was what it was. I thought this was a good idea So I walked into a pitch and I said Okay, here it is I'm a Korean kid, but I'm not yeah, I don't have an accent. You know me and but I was raised by my grandfather Who's very Korean? Okay, and my parents had both died and they're like, okay
Starting point is 00:12:06 So it's me and my grandfather and we run a hotel Because that's interesting. Yeah, I good, but here's the catch then I pointed to the sky a Hotel in space. Oh, you fucking lost them that as soon as I said that I Lost them but you check this out. I imagine a sitcom. Okay, right? Kind of like Star Trek, right? Mm-hmm, but my immigrant grandfather and I run this fucking like it's kind of like a You know, it's not a half-way house, but it's more like a motel six in space So it's like Sky City. Yeah, so there's like degenerates like Jetsons the Jetsons. Oh, yeah Yeah, and like, you know, I mean like my immigrant grandfather
Starting point is 00:12:53 arguing with an alien that doesn't have any eyes Is this a real movie or an animated movie? It's a TV show. It's a live-action pitch. It's a live-action Three cameras sitcom. I like it. I dig it. My brother just called me. Should I should I call him back? No, cuz you he I'm gonna call him right now. Okay. I'm gonna call my brother Steve But he does not gonna know that we're on a podcast. Okay, if you guys do be quiet be quiet This is what my brother really sounds like We can't edit this What's up, dude
Starting point is 00:13:28 Oh, it's okay. Yeah, I don't know I'm too nervous to watch. I have to um, Dave got me a new dance instructor Will you have a new dance instructor? Yeah, just for the tour. Yeah, but you know how to dance already. No, I know, but it's like new moves. Like what flips? No, like hip-hop Well, he doesn't know how to dance Dave doesn't know how to dance either So you got a dance Yeah, do you want to have soup later?
Starting point is 00:14:19 Okay, can you wait an hour and then we'll go get some soup No, I'm doing my podcast right now One hour. All right, buddy Phone call with the Lee brothers. See that's what it's normally like. I love your brother. I love Steve I feel like he can already dance. He's better than most people. He's a dance machine and you know what Dave? Joe Put some through this shit just to do it because of power. That's not true They're he gets paid to do it. Oh, you're paid though. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you don't get paid. So yeah, you still do shit I do it for the love. Yeah. Yeah, we are an unpaid team over here
Starting point is 00:15:02 I think the only person who gets paid is you because of ticket numbers for your show Yeah, and also on top of pink dick. What do you get out of it? George has a nine to five. He's doing this because he believes in it and he Thinks that I'm going to tell you how much I met George. I met George. I was signed by maker studios Okay, you guys know what that is they're owned by disney now But they before it was lisa, um, donovan and her husband that started it A boyfriend Danny's app Danny. They were married. Yeah. Oh, okay. Fuck face. I know. I don't know So years ago lisa calls me. She goes, hey, I'm starting this company called maker
Starting point is 00:15:42 I go, what is it? She comes to the studios. It was at her apartment in venice And I go into the side of their apartment. It's like a green screen in a room or whatever And I'm like, I don't want to do this She said it's gonna be big I go, no, no, it's okay. It's okay. It's okay. It's not gonna be big Then years later they go come again, but we have a new studio. This is when they were on washington, right? It was bigger and then all of a sudden it just kept getting bigger and then the next thing, you know, lisa's like I'm selling it to disney for 500 million dollars. Jesus. Jesus christ. Good lord. Do you believe that?
Starting point is 00:16:20 I believe it and I'm the asshole that goes no, no No, thank you. So how did you meet george and um, so when I was so lisa when she wanted me to be on maker I go, okay, I'll do it and then I got Producers the first person I got was mickey Right, and then I got who? Patrick I remember Patrick and then I got you Because you wanted it George has always believed in me. George has always been very excited about me. He's the only one in that company that I felt like and ricky
Starting point is 00:16:56 Like true devoted love. What was that? That's very unusual. It's very but but disney disney bought it and then they said It's unusual because that's a really good thing to have like a very responsible white man in your corner Because he wields power and also whitey a white pink dick Look at me right now, man. I really appreciate it We appreciate you george and even the first video that you put out and how you cut it. Yeah, right out the gate It looks amazing. So good. Yeah, and I'll never ask to see your dick Why not? Maybe one day. Would you show me a dick eventually? But george you do stand-up now too. So um, I maybe have you do one of my shows
Starting point is 00:17:38 Yeah You're gonna do it's gonna happen Yeah, yeah, it's gonna happen soon. Um, do you want to do bakersfield with me saturday? I don't know what that is. Um, so a guy Oh, the private guy in bakersfield is paying bobby I can I disclose the amount? No. Oh a good amount to play one show So I don't know if it's in his house. It's so I've done this before so this is common for stand-up comics to get these gigs Sometimes like a millionaire will go. I want to have a party. I want a comic. Who's my favorite comic? So
Starting point is 00:18:16 You know, I rarely do I get these opportunities, but I've done them before and you go to a mansion And it's their friends and family. They have a mic little fucking you think but george and I were talking about this Like there's a risk because the guy could be a big fan of yours, but his friends may not even know who the hell you are So it may it might make for a really like awkward show. Yeah, every time it's a disaster. So they're the worst gigs basically Oh, yeah, people are drinking punch at the thing. You know, I mean people are walking by with food So it's oh because it's not set up like a show. It's people are just having a party Sometimes it's very nightmarish, but you go you gave you're giving me the money to do it. Yeah So I'm willing to go through hell for money
Starting point is 00:18:54 Oh, yeah, Bobby likes the numbers. I like the numbers, you know, man So I drive out the baker's field, but I'm probably gonna need you to go through the hell with me Okay, right. It's gonna be really sad. We should tape it. Let's tape. Yeah, we should all go on a road trip guys on saturday Yeah, we should tape it. We'll tape it and put it on our thing. Yeah, don't make any promises But we're gonna try our best. Yeah, yeah made a million promises. Um, I have to confront you about two things Okay, okay First is um, so your doctor emailed and said, hey, I hope you've stuck to a good fitness regimen and diet Right
Starting point is 00:19:30 You don't want to talk about it. Well, I'm gonna talk about it because you brought it up Don't talk about it. Just we'll bring it up, babe. So we could talk about it So I I clean out your car over the weekend and I find I accidentally sit on a second Melted Snickers bar happy from the same from the same Snickers bar bar by the way Yeah, and I found a different Butterfingers stash. I love Butterfingers. They're so crispy in the middle. So what is It's a commercial. They're so crispy in the middle Butterfingers. They're the greatest. It's a flaky, you know the layers of flakes Yeah, right. It's orange and it's a really good color. It's good. I'll give you that What I'm saying is where do we go from here because we already determined that you were prediabetic
Starting point is 00:20:11 Okay, so where do we go? I'm gonna ask you a question now. You want to go full dia? Yeah, can I go can I go Beaties? You want to go full Beaties? Yeah. Yeah, I'll go for Beaties Is that what you're going for? Okay. I want to look at you right now. Yeah, okay friend. Okay. Okay girlfriend Yes, girlfriend. Oh, I mean, okay. All right. So I'm in Schomburg Illinois, okay, okay, right by a mega mall. Okay. What's around there is TGI Fridays. Yeah, okay all of garden These are the restaurants around there. Yes, very suburbia suburbia, right
Starting point is 00:20:44 And I have no car and it's cold as fuck. Okay, and I wake up during the day and I go, I'm hungry. Okay Where do I go? Not eat No, your butterfinger stash and Snickers bar. I found in the car Not in Schomburg. I'm just telling you. I'm just telling you what I did last weekend There are healthy options even in the shittiest of places. You just have to know. So you want brown lettuce Why was TGI Friday has a brown lettuce. Yes. I want you to eat rotten lettuce.
Starting point is 00:21:16 You don't want to get E. Coli. What do you call it? E. Coli. Babe, I'm trying to survive out there, babe. Well, you're not going to survive much longer if You continue on this butterfinger diet It's flaky though in the middle, right? When you crisp into it, it's hard for me. I have another thing to say to you What is your favorite candy bar that really quick? Oh anything with coconut. I think so almond joy I'd used to be the cheap stuff almond joy, but I like I gotta eat anything Gilbert and I went on a fat boy spree. So I can't even like I can't even um, hound you that badly Because all Gilbert and I did all weekend. Yeah
Starting point is 00:21:54 Was eat bad things and you know, he's I've never just seen him Gilbert is a true fat boy in the sense that He never eats in front of people. He he hides. He has stashes or he he'll he'll eat with us Right eat a small amount and he'll say bye. Bye. Bye guys And then wait five minutes in the parking lot and go back in the restaurant So he can order himself like a bigger pot so he can he doesn't need the judgment He doesn't get the judgments from us. Oh And I didn't I didn't know him. I didn't know fat birth until this weekend
Starting point is 00:22:24 I never seen anybody look at green tea pancakes with mascarpone quite like Gilbert did Are they good? So good. I know they are He is the most efficient garbage disposal slash vacuum that I have ever encountered in my life And we were really bad this weekend Is that true? Yeah, are you crying? No. Why are you crying right now? Why the fuck are you crying?
Starting point is 00:22:53 Why are you crying? I'm gonna get fat again, dude I'm gonna get fat again. I'm not crying. I'm just as I've learned to cats, but yeah Yeah, are you you feel like you're gonna get fat again? I think I'm gonna get fat again I she's bringing all these memories and he used to hide whole chickens under his bed. Well, first of all I don't tell people that oh don't tell people that I'm pretty sure it's not a surprise. Let me ask you this. You used to hoard food then, huh? Yeah And you underneath underneath the bed you had like stashes. I used to have boxes of just like candy bars
Starting point is 00:23:26 Like the movie fat camp. Yeah. Yeah. What's wrong with that though? Maybe we're just born to be a fat guy. No, no, I will not go back to that because I never got laid Do you get laid now? Yes Okay, that's a win. That's what I'm saying. If I get fat again, I will lose confidence I won't get laid. Yeah, and on top of that It's just you want to suck the system dry when we have to pay for your diabetic foot ulcer Yeah, very negative. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. But look, I was on board with you not all athletes I haven't worked out at fucking day in two years. Look, I'm saying I was I ate just as bad as you this weekend
Starting point is 00:24:02 Are you're fucking tears about? Like what you regret recently because you're eating these pancakes or or you Or are you like literally going back into the past crying because he's reliving it you missed the food He wants some hot dogs right now. Tears are a couple couple things one. I missed the food Like this reminded me like her just being like eat this eat this. I was like He didn't say no to one thing I didn't say no to anything and then what did you do after that because you still look great and look I'll look at this right here Sweetie. Yeah, okay. So these are two empty packs of
Starting point is 00:24:34 So good. So good chocolate dipped mangoes. Yeah, and there were three packs of Regular dried mangoes and I put them here so that George and all of us could share today for the podcast He ate all of this in half a day You and then when I went out and I had something right now. Those were gifts to me. I know those are his favorite I get to fucking um do 10 of these twacks on your arms Come on. He already feels bad about being fat. I don't care. I need twacks. Oh my god All right, I can't believe I weighed that much weight before you won't Gilbert. I won't let you get fat again
Starting point is 00:25:08 Hey, hey, hey, hey, I don't want you to be on camera What is this? Yeah, what is this? Ready? It's a good thing. I don't feel pain. We're right here. Can you see it here? Yeah, okay, ready Fuck man, I think we're starting at a low level. No, no, no, I can't all the way through fast fast. No Babe lick it again. Really lick it. Yeah, fuck you for Hannah don't set net toss it sick sick. Oh, but move the fucking spot I don't know Bobby
Starting point is 00:25:40 eight nine Okay, now I get to do it to you. Why since you ate a deep dish pizza Oh, you can do it. You can do it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. This is like every time I fucked up I deserve it Make sure we zoom up on Bobby's eyes Oh, fuck. Ow Wow, why are you doing it so hard? No, I have to it's not it's all about hitting the same spot
Starting point is 00:26:07 Don't deviate from the same spot. How it makes it painful four five six Oh, you don't feel pain seven. That's crazy. It's all fat That's why you have diabetes His nerves are all dead I was down right there. Oh, god, what's going on here? We're tired. Um, now I get to do you
Starting point is 00:26:28 I don't feel pain either. Yeah, let me do you guys to do you for cheating on him with Yeah, yeah, yeah, you with pink dick and fucking uh fatty fat which which part I don't want to hurt you, baby Okay, that's true love. That's true love. How's your arm pretty good? Oh, it's bleeding, but yeah, yeah Yeah, good job guys. So that's the confrontation. Is that one thing? Oh, there's another thing. Okay, here we go Don't be defensive. Can I'm just asking a question? Okay, so a month ago We went to the doc the last episode we talked about how I don't talk about my foot beta blocker saved your life You did right? Yeah, so you told the doctor that you would take beta blockers as Needed so on auditions or when you were especially nervous, right? Do you had a 30?
Starting point is 00:27:11 30 day supply of beta blockers, which means that you probably had about 30 pills there You've only had three auditions since you've finished 30 pills In a span of three weeks. Hey now, no, I take one a day. Oh like a vitamin To vitamin one a day. Yeah. Yeah. Do you know what you're doing to yourself? I feel great. Oh, serious. I feel really great No, I think I know what happened now last week Okay, oh, I think now this is gonna know fuck you I know and now there's gonna start an argument and you want to get confrontational
Starting point is 00:27:43 I'm gonna get real. Okay. Let me say my side first and then you can defend yourself Okay, so I was on beta blockers for a year and a half because of my heart condition and the reason I stopped it was because I Hated the way my mind could not function on them to take beta blockers intermittently here and there is Good for your anxiety, but to take it every day like I did for a year and a half made me foggy brain I didn't feel like my brain was being profused with blood. I felt like I couldn't come up with with good ideas I couldn't write. I couldn't speak. I felt like a A living zombie and I it made me depressed. It made me unmotivated and I told my doctor It's like look, I don't feel like my brain is functioning and she said well
Starting point is 00:28:30 Yeah, because your blood pressure is probably, you know, low you take it every day So you're probably not getting as much blood perfusion to your brain and I'm thinking to myself. Oh crap Maybe Bobby's taking too many beta blockers Yeah So what is your counter? My counter is this is that there was a time where I took them every day for like a year right mm-hmm and It's fine. I feel more confident on them when I perform
Starting point is 00:29:03 When did you stand up? I just feel happier when I'm on them You know me and I don't get as panicky. I don't get as like Nervous or you know me in and full of like anxiety. I'm not against and so what I'm saying what I'm saying is is that to me what happened Thursday with the bad audition. Yeah, would have been So much more disastrous right without them without no, I'm not saying that you you shouldn't have taken them I wouldn't be able to speak. I'm saying why have you been taking them every day when you don't have auditions every day You've only had three although you've consumed 30
Starting point is 00:29:39 pills Yeah, so why did you take them on days? You didn't need them or didn't have because they make me feel better about Like when I do a stand-up show or whatever. I just feel better when I'm on them It really does it makes me happier. I get depressed when I'm not I had such a different experience It made me not sexual it made me know for me. It makes me feel so much happier. I I feel like what I'm like like totally mentally and everything. I don't shift into more of a negative thing Well, that's a different conversation that you should be having with your doctor because a beta blocker is not made for anxiety
Starting point is 00:30:19 It's it's off-label use a beta blocker is a heart medication So I don't trust me to is is that I've been splitting them to at times. Yeah, I don't take four ones and it's also I Mean if you want me to not take them, I won't take them But it's like for me. I I'm not even I'm being completely honest with you That I feel so much better when I'm on them versus not and so if if you say Not to take them. I will not take them, but you know what I mean? I feel like They help. I I believe that they help what I'm saying is a long-term everyday use of beta blocker is
Starting point is 00:31:00 Is unnecessary for somebody like you you have good blood pressure and plus beta blockers have sort of a side effect That fucks with your blood sugar over time and if you're already pre-diabetic You're just you're you're taking you're putting something in your body That's just gonna complicate things at this point if you need them for an audition or for high stress situations fine And now I'm not a doctor. I'm not a professional All I'm saying is that you should probably talk to your doctor if you intend on taking it every day Because that's different from taking it three times a month. Uh-huh, and there, you know You your liver processes things like you have to take your organs into consideration
Starting point is 00:31:38 That's all Okay, well Well Bobby's died his liver is I mean, um Yeah, I mean it's the thing is is that All right, I mean I heard what you said they were prescribed to me all right Yeah, but you've been stealing my old ones now because you ran out of yours. I did you're not addicted, right? No, no, no, it's not it's not habit for me. No, it's not habit. No, I just I honestly like I I honestly feel So much more confident when I'm on them and that's just maybe it's psychological
Starting point is 00:32:14 Maybe it's like in my mind or whatever. Yeah, but you know, that's that and it's like if you don't want me to take it I won't fucking take it You know me, but I'm gonna just tell you this right now my friends, okay? Okay, I have 14 years clean and sober March 6th boom, okay? I'm not saying I'm not using it as a crutch or anything like that But I'm just saying that I'm a guy that used to take 50 vikens a day Not that it was healthy and drank 24 hours a day Jesus took 20 fucking volumes to go to sleep. I'm like a fucking water buffalo You know, I really am I mean I could I literally can you mean?
Starting point is 00:32:49 smoke heroin Do nine shots of whiskey and then like be a juggle Juggle like I'm like I'm weird in that way. You know me is very strong Like he is a freak of nature in that sense like he doesn't age him and his brother don't age Yeah, I'm like I'm like you ever see the movie Highlander. Wow. Yeah. Have you seen it? No, you have it clan McLeod watch it It's a great movie. I will Christopher Lambert Sean Connery Sean Connery the original one, right? There was a remake. I understand that fuckface. Okay, okay, but I'm kind of like that You're Highlander like 50 years from now. I might own it like a you know a vintage, you know
Starting point is 00:33:31 Furniture shop from shit, you know me and but there's a dungeon where they have swords and you know me and an armor and stuff like that And I I freak people out But I'm you know, I'm evolved. Yeah, and I'm super I have a question for you Is it gonna be another fucking one about my eating butter fingers? I love them. It's gonna be about it's gonna be about You know beta blockers video games. I don't know here. We go again. Here we go another Be good. This could be good. No, I I wanted to ask you where you're at cuz people want to know where you're at with fallout I'm on my third character in fallout. Okay. I created a black person Okay, look at George. I don't know
Starting point is 00:34:09 Morris Cuen is why I called him Right, that's a pretty good name. I make it make them look like Delroy Lindo like but also thick like Baines body Oh, he's dark. So his first character was a woman. You know, yeah, his second days ton Calala was an Asian guy No, he was an Asian but he was look. He looked 20th ornbergish 20th ornbergish. Yeah, I wanted I wanted to myth honor that what's up his dick Oh, okay. Well, okay, that's another character. Anyway, let's move on. That's the third character Delroy Lindo, right? Yeah. So your third character, I've been noticing you have a pattern of what you do in the game now. So I think when you were a woman, you went through a
Starting point is 00:34:51 different like storyline. Yeah. When you were a Tony Thornberg character, you went through a different storyline. Yeah. But now I've been watching you play. Yeah. And I see you, you know, just like all day just planting like radioactive watermelons. Wait, so you're telling me you have a farm? He has a farm, right? And so this is, he's a black guy. He has farms and black guy just farming watermelons. I don't know, but he has. I'm gonna repeat, you have a black guy farming watermelons in the game. It's kind of like a Sims game in the sense that you can build these communities, right? And you can farm. So you know what I mean? With my Tony Thornberg, he would farm gourds, okay, tomatoes, these wheat. But you know what I mean? You're having a black
Starting point is 00:35:44 guy farm watermelons. Because that's what my character likes. There's you know, Maurice likes that. You know Maurice likes that. Not only does Maurice plant radioactive watermelons all day on his plantation. He has he has Asian co he has Asian workers work for him. Oh, that's okay. And but then he puts sacks over their head. That's not okay. I do. Well, so like he's actually a racist black guy, but only towards Asians. So he doesn't want to shut the fuck up. All right. So in the game, there are these two Asians that live in sanctuary. And they're always complaining. Like one of them is always like, I don't know, like, you know, don't talk to me right now. I'm really sad. Right. And his sister's even bitchier. Like don't talk to me like my friends. So what Maurice did
Starting point is 00:36:27 was he put bags over their heads, like potato sacks. You can do that in the game. Yeah, that's over people. So it's part of the wardrobe. One of the choices. Yeah. But if you see his characters and they have a sock over their head, they're Asian. Yeah, all the Asians that are in the game that are live in any of my communities have sacks over their heads. What is the symbolism? What's the psychology behind that? Because of the LA riots. Fuck. Because of the LA. The opposite. The Koreans hated it. Because the thing is, is that Koreans created Asians create these liquor stores in these poor neighborhoods that like bind black people, put them in chains. And then when black people walk into the liquor stores, right, they're accused
Starting point is 00:37:09 of stealing. Always like, you know, they like those old stereotypical things. You touch your body, you know, browsing, all that stuff. Right. So in Maurice's world, my character, which I'm sorry, it's my fucking game. And I get to do what I want. Right. He's a big black guy who fucks white chicks. Oh, exclusively. Yeah. And he puts bags over Asian people's heads. That part. And he loves watermelon. And it's not racist because there's only five ingredients you can fucking plan anyway. What are they? Mutt fruit. Gourd. Gourd. Okay. Tomato. Corn. And there's like a wheat. And then watermelon. Interesting fallout. Yeah. So it's like, and he just strictly does watermelon. Wow. And only on some of some of the other farms, he does like tomatoes and stuff like.
Starting point is 00:37:54 Ooh, he's diversifying his portfolio. Yeah. Yeah. But he loves watermelon. So that's where Bobby is at with fallout. He is walking a mile in a black man in black man shoes. He's my favorite character, by the way. Can I just say also this, right? With my Korean Asian character, my 20 Thornburg, right? He became evil. He destroyed all the other factions. He murdered people. Right. Oh, wow. And then with the black guy, right? What I'm going to do is do the right route. Be a good guy. He's a good guy. He's a good guy. Right. So this is how I feel about African Americans in general. Right. So what you're seeing here is a man, an Asian man, who feels guilty about his ancestry. L.A. Riots. L.A. Riots. And how like we were up in the fucking
Starting point is 00:38:41 rooftops with shotguns when the L.A. Riots came. Did you see that? Yeah, I saw videos. Yeah, videos on that, right? And I apologized to African Americans. Everybody was just trying to protect what they thought they needed to protect. Loot. Loot my store. Okay. And I apologize. The watermelon thing's a little racist, but I'm sorry. It's not. It was, it's one of the options on in the game. Yeah. So I don't, I don't blame you. That's Tiger Bell is a bit of black history month. Oh, yes, it is still black history. It was a great time, Bobby. Oh, I saw another documentary called the Black Panthers. What's that? Oh, about the Black Panthers on PBS, but it's on iTunes. Fucking riveting. Amazing documentary. Who did it? What? The documentary.
Starting point is 00:39:24 PBS. Oh, PBS did. But it really is enlightening. I thought Black Panthers were just like a bunch of black guys that were leather and just, you know, I mean, just call them the Black Panthers. We're a dance team. No, you did not think that. I really did. I really did think that. You didn't think that. You didn't think that. I thought they were, I thought they were like the Jabba Waukes, but like the black, the 70s. The 70s. Yeah. The Jabba Waukes. No, they threw their hats and they did a little dance move and then they just flips and stuff like that. But they weren't that. They weren't. They weren't. No, they were a, they weren't. They were a group of people that fought for, you know what I mean? A real noble cause, which is their freedom. You know what I mean?
Starting point is 00:40:02 And they did it and people go, they did it in a violent way. No, they didn't. All right. There was many people, I don't know, I forget their names in it, but like in that organization was very just, you know, noble and they were being fucking beat up by police and treat like shit and dogs, eating their buttholes and all kinds of stuff. Not literally, but you know what I mean? But, um, yeah, it was a really good documentary and the, the, the, my, and you know what they did? The FBI are fucking, you know who with J Edgar Hoover was a fucking fuck face. I fucking hate his face. J Edgar Hoover. Yeah. He was a piece of shit and the FBI was a piece. I said it right now and I say, record this. Yeah. I mean, tell me, tell Barack, all right. They were fucking
Starting point is 00:40:43 shitheads, murderers. It was a guy named Frankie from the Black Panthers who was like an up and rising like, you know what I mean? A member who was a fantastic speaker. He could motivate white people to, you know what I mean? And he was just an amazing, you know what I mean? Figure. They just, the FBI just walk in with the Chicago police force and they just slaughter them when they're asleep and nothing happens. It's crazy. And it's like, you know, I thought that they were a dance troupe. I thought they were the Black Jabba Walkies in the 70s. Speaking of social activism, I, we have to delve into this because I think it's important and we do have a lot of Filipino fans. What are your thoughts on Manny Pacquiao? I love him. Very talented guy.
Starting point is 00:41:31 Say his comments. Well, I'm going to run up. I'm going to quickly give you a synopsis of what he's done in the last week. So during an interview, he goes on to say, well, in Tagalog, he says, he basically says like, gays are worse than animals. At least animals can determine, you know, man from woman and only have like heterosexual sex, which he's wrong about. There's like 400 species of animals that engage in homosexual sex. And then he goes, he makes an apology the day after and he's like, I'm sorry for hurting your feelings, blah, blah, blah, blah. But then the next day, he's like, oh yeah, I stand by my stance. When he apologized, he says, I stand by the fact that I don't agree in same sex marriage, but I'm sorry that I hurt the feelings
Starting point is 00:42:24 of, you know, many, you know, gay people, blah, blah, blah. But the next day he posts an Instagram post quoting Leviticus, where Leviticus says, you know, death or gay should be put to death. Yeah, I completely agree with that. Let me just say this. Jesus, hey, man, retraction with Bobby Wood. Listen to me right now. Okay, Leviticus, let's go there. Yeah, can I eat shrimp? If you eat shrimp, you should be murdered. I fucking love shrimp though. I know. But then you know might get in the gallows. Okay. Okay. Tattoos done. Yeah. So you're dead. You're dead. I'm gonna die right now. I should. I'm gonna, we're gonna. Mani Pacquiao should die. Yeah. Yeah. He has a fucking tattoo. Yeah, he should die. What else is Leviticus or
Starting point is 00:43:06 I don't even know. I don't know. Whatever. Let me just say something right now. Okay. You fucking piece of shit. Mani Pacquiao. You love fucking troll. All right, man. I'm sorry. You're a champion. You're very good at what you do. I will spend $100 on your fights. But that's not what I'm saying right now. What I'm saying right now, you piece of fucking shit. You have to. This is what people need to. So many 180s. What the fuck? You know what? That's sort of how I felt the whole weekend. I've been flip-flopping and I want to stick to his side and be like, look, like what he said was completely wrong and he should be, you know, told, you know, whatever. Kalyla Kuhn's final stance. Go. I have a lot to say about
Starting point is 00:43:50 this. Final stance. No, no, no, no, no. Final stance. Fuck you, man. Let me delve into this a little. Let me probe this issue a little bit more. Get into it, baby. Your people. Okay. And you can chime in with whatever. I'll do whatever I want. It's my show. People have to understand. Our show, I mean. That. It could be your show. No, it's our show. I'm just an accessory. I love not, baby. You're the best. Don't get, don't get inside yourself. Let's go. So people have to understand that like Manny is, he's, he's part of the conservative party in the Philippines, right? He's a congressman, right? Yeah. But that's the equivalent of being like a super conservative, like super, right? Republican over here. And they all hold the same views
Starting point is 00:44:30 on homosexuality. I mean, yes, they do. It's only rhetoric though, right? I don't really believe that politicians, especially in America, they're a right wing, really believe that the things that Donald Trump, right, are saying aren't stuff that he really believed. He's just catering to a, you know what I mean? Certain audience, a certain group, right? It's pandering, right? But they don't, you know, Donald Trump has many gay friends. Yeah. Donald Trump has many Mexican friends. Right, right, right. And you know what? This is what he is running for office and in a country where 93 percent of Filipinos still believe that abortions are wrong. This is probably going to get him the winning ticket, right? Yeah. Those statements. I mean, as, as awful as they found, this is,
Starting point is 00:45:13 I'm pretty sure on his part, it's still a strategic move as with, you know, Donald Trump saying all hell to Muslims, right? But my thought on this for people who aren't into politics, who just have been fans of Pacquiao is this, this doesn't surprise me that he said this. It doesn't surprise me at all. I'd be an idiot to expect more from any Pacquiao. Yeah, but he's, he's, man, sweetie, Manny is a simpleton. When simpletons, they mean well, they're well intentioned. He's a, but they, they say a bunch of stupid shit. And if you don't think Manny Pacquiao is a simpleton, you're a fucking simpleton. He's not educated. He's not an educated guy. Manny Pacquiao is a boxer. He goes in the ring to beat up other human beings, right? You're correct. So it's like whatever he
Starting point is 00:46:01 says, I don't take literally or I don't, it doesn't, it's like if he said that, if he was at my house right now, bubby, you know what I mean? Bubby. I go, yeah? He goes, faggot, you know, whatever he says. Sure, Manny says that. Okay. The faggot, the, the bug, the bug, bug, bug, bug, bug, bug. Now I'll do the way I want to do it. Okay. Okay. Bubby. I go, yeah, back at the bug hole. No good. And then you say, good, good. I'll go, um, cool, man. And that's it. You walk away. Yeah. What the fuck? You go, hey, man, that's, that's wrong. Yep. I'm going to say my friend Gilbert does that. And then it's like, my friend Gilbert does that. And that's wrong. That's not true. There's this, there's this, um, article on GQ and by a Filipino guy, his name is, um, Chris Guyomali. And, um,
Starting point is 00:46:55 he says that he actually wrote something that really I, this is my, shared my exact same sentiment about the situation. He said that the Philippines is still so conservative. You can think of it like the American South. It's impoverished, faith driven. It's teeming with optimism and socially, but it's socially conservative. So you, he thinks of Manny as his dumb, happy, homophobic uncle with good intentions. And I'd have to agree. Yeah. That's, you cannot put Manny in a pedestal that he doesn't belong in. He doesn't have an edu, he doesn't have, he never had a good education. Nope. He was a rags to riches kid. Exactly. He was picked up, thrown into the limelight and he performed as an athlete. And this is where we need to separate the athlete from the man. And you know,
Starting point is 00:47:40 Filipinos are disappointed because they say, Oh, you know, he is the voice of the Philippines. He is such a, he is the spokesperson. He's been such a great representative. If he didn't know what a box, right? We would go to the Philippines and he'd be in a tree. Probably. Yeah. And go, Hey, and you'd be like, but up by bike, but up by bike, bike, bike, bike, and they throw poop on you. And then you're like, Oh shit, that's real. Hey, what do you have to always make a seem like just fucking like heathens, like tree dwelling heathens. Oh, here's a face again. No, what I'm saying is not, not all Filipinos, just him. You realize I was born in the Philippines. I saw the Maniapakia documentary. They showed where he was raised in Sarangani, you know, like a fucking wood
Starting point is 00:48:26 cave. It was very poor. Yeah. He grew up in a wood cave. You know what I mean? Sounds like a fall for area. Yeah, wood cave. It still sucks though that a Filipino in such a position of power would so boldly say what he said. And the only reason I say it's disappointing for someone like me is because when a Maniapakia fight is on in the Philippines, everything is shut down. Crime is reduced to zero. Like it's such, he's such a unifying figure in that way. He gets Filipinos together from all walks of life. All their eyes are just glued to the screen, right? So it's to be such a unifying figure in that way. And then all of a sudden say something so divisive and say something so to just, you know, take one group of people and just like dismiss
Starting point is 00:49:10 them all together is disappointing. But you know, I, my final statement is that I give him a pass because Maniapakia is basic as fuck. He's basic. If you ever didn't think he was basic, you're fucking basic yourself. Also, can I just say this? All right. Can I just say this? All right. You can't listen, man. Listen, Maniapakia is great at what he does is a boxer. Other than that, I don't listen to anything. He says, same with Bill Cosby. I love the Cosby show. Guess we're bringing it to Bill Cosby right now. Bill Cosby himself. There's a difference. Great stand up special. A classic, right? George is like, no, no, don't agree with any of it. But here's why we should also give Maniapakia. In the 10 years that he has been this big,
Starting point is 00:50:01 you know, prolific boxer, he has helped Filipinos in so many different ways. He has helped his province of Sarangani. He has helped so many poor people. So he's given back to the country more so than any other Filipino with money, right? But he isn't our official spokesperson because that would be like saying Plaxico Burris, who fucking shot himself in the leg is America's official spokesperson. I would put them on par like in the same like realm of you know, like thinking. They probably, you know, they're a little basic. I was going to say something was so racist, but I can't say it. But for sure, don't say it. I can't say it. But for sure, there's no editing. So don't say it. Okay, maybe don't say it. Oh my God. So do you give Maniapakia
Starting point is 00:50:43 a pass? I'm going to say it. Don't say it, don't say it. Just maybe like, yeah, Filipinos, you know, I was going to say, I was going to say, many packages and a lot of things. Like he created a ladder so other Filipinos from the trees can walk down. Can you cut that out? We can't. This is a no editing episode. So careful what you say. Can you cut that out though? He said Maniapakia created ladders. That's not racist. For other Filipinos. But you remember what happened. He cut that out. Believe me, he keeps saying it over and over. You know what? You guys have to be careful. Cut it out. Listen, because remember Filipinos have a very mob mentality. If they want to ride you, they will ride you. Remember Adam Carola? They will destroy me.
Starting point is 00:51:22 Remember how he had to make a fucking official apology to like Filipinos because he said something like when he's like years ago. Oh, oh fuck. He said that like Filipinos like pray to like chicken bones and stuff. You have to cut it out. This is not live. It's live. It is? Yeah. No, it's not. No, it's not. We're fine. So what is your final Gilbert? Do you give Maniapakia a pass? No. Oof. All right. Because he doesn't support my lifestyle. What about you, sweetie? I love him. No, he's bad. I don't know what the fuck. I don't give a fuck. Anyway, what do we do on here? Unhelpful advice with Bobby and Kalaila. What time are we at? The perfect time. The usual time. Always. My gut's always right. Dear Tiger Belly, I have two daughters, a one-year-old
Starting point is 00:52:07 and a two-year-old. What is a good age to enroll them into a martial arts class? What types do you think would benefit in discipline and practical use in the real world? I don't know because I'm not a parent. I already know. So even like soccer or sports, what's a good time to enroll for discipline? Anything. For a baby? For a baby. For your children when you have them. She said martial arts though. Yeah. Okay. Jiu-jitsu. Jiu-jitsu. Jiu-jitsu. Very young. Like what's young? Five. Oh, okay. I think they have to be at least a certain age though to get in. Because my friend's daughter just joined and I think she had to be like at least like four or something like that. Yeah, four then. At four years old, jiu-jitsu. Because I think that that right there is a real life
Starting point is 00:52:48 to discipline. Martial art that you can use in real life situations. What was that? With sports, I'm, I'm, I don't know, I see it both ways. I was forced into a sport and I was forced to really, really start slaving away too young, I think. How old were you when you first started swimming? I started competing at the age of six. Full competitions. Damn, that's like first grade. Yeah. And I started, um, I made the Philippine team and I was nine, I think. So like, yeah, but it was not always a very pleasant experience. It was really hard on my body, you know? I love, I just gotta just say this too. I just love Filipino athletes in general. Because Manny Pacquiao, just name two. Manny Pacquiao. I'll, Manny Pacquiao and I'm gonna leave
Starting point is 00:53:39 it, I'm gonna name you two more. Yeah. The Splash Brothers. The Splash Brothers are for what they do. Not the Golden State Warriors. This is a different Splash Brothers. Look up everyone at listening to right now on YouTube, Filipino dive team, Splash Brothers. I don't think they're called Splash Brothers. Yes they are. Just like a Filipino dive team. Yeah, yeah. There is the two worst, back to back in one competition, the two of the worst dives you've ever seen. Can I just do it now? I think we've all seen it. I don't think people have. I'm gonna show you, I'm gonna show you on the camera right here. Can you do that? Yeah, but also, we're not gonna read. Well, we'll put a link in the video. Is that gonna read? No, I don't. George? Probably won't read. I'm gonna watch it.
Starting point is 00:54:21 I'm gonna look at it anyway. He's gonna watch it for his own pleasure on a podcast. I want you, oh, we ran into an old friend of Bobby when we were at breakfast today and he's a comic and he used to be Sam Kinnison's best friend. His name is Karla Bo. I don't know. You don't know him? Because you don't know nothing. That's true. You know who Sam Kinnison is. Oh my god. You have to know who Sam Kinnison is. Yeah. Yeah, but let's not make him feel bad. Let's just educate him. Go ahead, sweetie. Okay, so there was two guys from Houston that moved to LA back in the early 80s and they were called the Houston boys. Actually, there was a group of guys. It was Bill Hicks was a part of it. Sam Kinnison and Karla Bo and a couple of other people. But Karla Bo and Sam
Starting point is 00:55:09 Kinnison were best friends. Sam Kinnison was probably one of the biggest standard comedians out of the 80s. Okay. He was huge, like the cover of Rolling Stone Magazine. Huge. Oh, okay. And Sam Kinnison was a rock star and he, well, Karla Bo was his best friend. Very funny comic himself. And one night they were driving on a street in Nevada and these kids were drunk and they hit Sam Kinnison's car and Sam died. But Karla Bo, his best friend who was also a very funny comic, was the one that held his body when he died. And Karla Bo, it was so traumatic to him that he quit comedy for a long time. You know what I mean? But then when he came back into the game is when I met him, you know, and he was, he's still, he's like 60 maybe, the best physical
Starting point is 00:56:05 comic I've ever seen. He's so funny. Very funny. And he's now gone through some things. I mean, I want to bring Karla Bo as a guest because he lives here in town now because he moved away for a long time. But we ran into Karla. He's one of the funniest comics. If you ever, if you have YouTube, check him out. He's very funny and he's a good guy. But you can always tell like people how long have you known him? How long have you known him? I've known him for 20 years. Oh, you can always tell people's vibe when you are first introduced to someone, you know? Yeah. And when he came in and Bobby introduced me to him, like he just gave like the warmest, like most sincere hug. Like you need to just feel it like right away. Yeah. Yeah. Seems like a nice
Starting point is 00:56:45 guy. We should have him on the podcast. Slash brothers. Here we go. First dive. Can you see it, George? It doesn't matter. Boom. The worst. I mean, this is you. This is you guys, Filipino. He's forced to watch. He's forced me to watch this on replay. Yeah. Look at this. He showed me this to be at a restaurant. Yeah. Yeah. Are you just like trying to make every Filipino feel worse than they already are? The best. You know what? I'm going to get, you got to edit a lot of this out. No, because the best they high five each other in the end. They do. Because they're embarrassed. I'm going to be real. I went to the Philippines with Kalaila and it was a beautiful country. And I, um, you didn't even see the good parts. I was waiting for nothing. Why are you
Starting point is 00:57:23 laughing? Here's the plan, guys. I love the people. Like I met her uncle who killed her other uncle with a machete. Yes, yes, yes. Kind man. You know what he said? My sister was in the Philippines with him recently. I think it's so much trouble. And, um, she was explaining to him what happened in Rancho Cucamonga, you know, where the, they had the shooter or whatever. Yeah. And he was explaining to my sister how those people would have never been able to get away or gone on their, like, you know, little escape car and like driven off somewhere. He, he explained to my sister that he would like peel the, the layer of skin off their feet and how he went into some like very like intricate plan as to how he would have done it if he were LAPD. And I'm like, and my sister's
Starting point is 00:58:07 like, yeah, they're not allowed to do that. Even if you, if you're a criminal, they're not allowed to peel the skin off your feet. They're like, why not? He's like, why not? Okay. That's why people share. So here's a plan, guys. Here is the plan. Listen to my fucking plan, Bobby. At game. Listen to my plan. January. Yeah. You, Gilbert, Georgie, and myself, we're all going to take a trip to the Philippines. Yes. We're going to videotape and we're going to podcast out there. Yes. And I'm going to make you really, really live the Filipino experience. I do. Yes. I do. I do. I do. You have to say I do, George. And we're going to do a sit down interview with my uncle. Balut. Balut. Yeah. We Balut. Balut. Yeah. Go in the river. We're going to go in the. We're going to get Gilbert
Starting point is 00:58:54 circumcised. Fuck, man. It's illegal. It's not illegal. Well, I just made that up. How much money do we need to do? He doesn't want to be circumcised. I want to be circumcised. No, it's disgusting what you're doing. No, my penis tip is very moist. Let me just say right now, I've seen it on porn and I don't like the way the little turtle head sticks out of the little sock. It's gross. So let me just see it. Are you? Let me see your dick. No, man. That's penis shaming. I'm going to. That's penis shaming. Make him show you, babe. No. Gilbert, show it. No. Hey, this is on video. Sexual harassment. Show it to me right now. No. It's not on video if you do it underneath here. I'm not showing you when we look with the time. I'm just so used to this, I think. I want to eat pancakes,
Starting point is 00:59:45 babe. You really have a lot of bull bull. It's a lot of bull bull. Like straight up, sweetie. I've never seen so much bull bull in my life. So much pubic hair. Kalala. We have a quick MMA minute. Oh, you're coming back? No. You guys can do it. I don't want to do it. Okay. So your thoughts on Cowboy Seroni winning this past weekend. He was great. It's expected. I mean. You like it? You're happy? I wasn't that hyped. We both really worked. We both knew he was going to win. Yeah, but you know what? I'm not going to discredit Brazilian cowboy. I mean, he looked like if any of his shots landed it that he could actually do legit damage. But you know, I love cowboy and I'm a cowboy believer. So I knew that fight was going to go that way. And you know, I think
Starting point is 01:00:32 who was the who was commentating? Is it John Anik? No, it was your favorite. The square, Brian Stan. Oh, Brian Stan. So he one of those guys said that, you know, we all often forget that, you know, Cowboy is a submission expert. Like he's what submitted in fit submitted people like 15 of this bunch. Yeah. So that was a pretty, you know, that was that was an awful, I mean, an awesome triangle finish. And, you know, I just wasn't as emotionally invested in any of those fights. Like I will say that it was, yeah, it didn't, it didn't really revs me up. Too much set. What else? What else we got? Just quick thing on that. If you're cowboy, Seroni, do you stay at 170? Or do you go down to go back down to 155? What do you think in his age, his career?
Starting point is 01:01:15 He's 30? What, two? I still think he can fight the best of them at 155. I mean, I thought that, you know, it was disappointing to see him go out like that against RDA, but I, I have, I have so much faith in that guy still. I still think he is one of the best. Like when I saw him just fucking toy miles jury. Do you remember that? Oh my God. Yeah. Yeah. That was, yeah, I love cowboy. Okay. And then the big fight coming up on fight pass. It's biggest fight on fight pass. Anderson Silva versus Michael one eye bissping. I care even less about this fight. I don't know why Anderson Silva. I know. After I watched that NSAC hearing of his Viagra of his Viagra, I just don't find him to be appealing in any way anymore. And not to say, I'm not taking away from how much he's given the
Starting point is 01:02:10 sport for however long he was in it. I just, I, my heart's not in it the same way. Like I'm not excited. And also Mike Bissping. It's like, I mean, I feel bad for his remaining eye. All right. So call the winner for this one. You got Anderson Silva. I'm Michael. Wow. Yeah. Decision, right? Decision. If you're choosing Michael Bissping, you're choosing, you're going to say decision. Probably. There you guys go. Well, let's set it. Put your money on Michael Bissping. Why don't you have an opinion? I don't need to. Cause I'm going to get heat for this. You're a professional fighter. I'm not professional. I've seen your feet. They're long. They can kick people in the face. Oh God. Zero technique. My God. Any shows for
Starting point is 01:02:52 Bobby this weekend or this week? Next couple of weeks? Well, he's going to be, yes. He's going to be, Bobby's going to be at San Jose Improv March 4th through the 6th. And then Ontario Improv. I think it's the week after that. And then April 7th, 8th and 9th. He's, he's doing a show with Polly Shore, Harlan Williams and Tom Green. So he has, one is going to be, is it called Joliet? Joliet Illinois? Yeah, Joliet. Yeah. Joliet Illinois. The second one will be in Rockford, Illinois. Rockford. And the third one will be somewhere in Iowa. You can go to his website, bobbyleelive.com and the tour dates are on there. Yeah. And then there's San Jose and Ontario. Yeah. San Jose and Ontario are March. So yeah. Cool. Make sure you follow us on Instagram at
Starting point is 01:03:48 Tiger Belly on Twitter at the Tiger Belly. You can also follow Kalyla at Calamity K and check out our YouTube channel. We have a YouTube channel guys. This is going to be video now. Go on there. Check it out. Make sure you subscribe. And if you are listening to this on YouTube or even iTunes, write us in the comments. Let us know who you want as a guest, maybe. And yeah, we'll see if we can make it happen. And make sure you follow Bobby Lee on Instagram at Gilbits, G-I-L-B-I-T-S at Gilbits. That's once again for Bobby Lee, G-I-L-B-I-T-S. Thank you guys so much for listening and we will see you next week. Bye. Bye. Hey, Prime members. You can listen to Tiger Belly ad-free on Amazon Music. Download the
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