TigerBelly - Episode 39: Ring and Sweats
Episode Date: May 4, 2016Bobby won't suck the venom out to save a friend. Khalyla wants to give someone her 200%. Gilbert is Professor Charles Xavier. We talk Asian sex symbols, TigerBelly club rules, and self-tickl...ing.  Recorded May 2, 2016 Music by Bobby Lee Instagram: @tigerbelly Twitter: @thetigerbelly YouTube.com/tigerbelly Facebook: thetigerbelly www.thetigerbelly.comSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.
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Hey Prime members you can listen to Tiger Belly add free on Amazon music download the app today
Oh
God welcome to another episode of Tiger Belly and Bob Gilbert
We got Pink Dick George and Kalilah here, and we're very excited to do this next episode of the Tiger Belly
Are we?
Rising Sun
I want to say something up front and I want to say that I appreciate and I love Tiger Belly fans
I really do
I dream about you guys
I want to have sexual intercourse with every single one of you, male or female
And I just love you, but there are just certain things that I want to throw out there things not to do
Okay
Last night I was at the comedy store
Packed room
People are in the room
I go up tell a couple of first jokes
And then all of a sudden I hear from the back
George has a pink dick
And it just puts and then I have to explain to the audience
I have a podcast we have a producer his name is George. He has a pink dick
You know and and the audience is going and the audience is going what why would you know I mean then I have to explain
Why I would even have to say that he has a pink dick
Which is because of the fact that he's white, you know, and it's a whole thing, right?
That's number one not to yell out that out. Okay. Number two
If I'm in a meeting
Yeah
I swear to God
No
Every single a meeting
I'll walk by someone to go to the bathroom and someone will yell out in an a meeting. Hey, dude, George is a pink dick
And I want to go ladies up there talking about God and about you know how a saved her life
If you yell out George is a pink dick out loud
Then I have to explain everyone to the room what that fucking that means and I don't want to do that out of the time
You know me and then everyone think I'm going to relapse and I relapsed
It's awkward
Bobby relapsed he's on heroin because you know, I mean people are now are yelling he's sucking guys dicks pink dick
He knows their pink
Yeah, yeah, so
Especially on your way to the bathroom
Yeah
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Like I'm sucking up George in the bathroom
Like that's a code phrase
So the two places not to yell that out are those two environments
Other than that if I'm driving down the street walking down the street
You mean you can say George is a pink dick
You can just yell out tiger belly
That works too
That works fine too
That's a good one
Yeah in a show or in a a meeting you can yell out tiger belly
Yeah
Right because then I can go it's a podcast he's you know, he's a newcomer or whatever
Yeah
Or in a show I can go that's my he's a fan of the time
George is a pink dick there's too much to explain
Right George is a pink dick was only to be used for a photo op if you wanted a photo with Bobby that's what you would say
Yeah, yeah
He does have one though
Yes
You know and the second thing I want to address
Is that the greatest upset in sports history happened today and nobody in the media is talking about it
I think all of Europe is probably talking about it
Yeah the rest of the world is
But Leicester City
A team that was 5,000 to one to win the Premier League
Here's another statistic is that you know what also odds is 5,000 to one that Elvis is still alive
That's a fan
Right so that's how crazy
Yeah
Leicester City winning the championship is
Yeah there's a carpenter from Leicester City who put in five five bucks
Yeah
And he won 25 grand
Yeah
Like if you if we would have put in five grand we'd be millionaires
Yeah
If you put in a hundred dollars you would have been half a million dollars up
Yeah we fucked it up
We fucked up
But you would never know that would be the somebody would have told you that was the worst bet that you could ever
It's like throwing a hundred dollars away
I think even mid-season the odds were still a thousand to one
Yeah and they were atop in the mid-season it's just it's an amazing
It's so unlikely because this is a team I think like just a few years ago they were in the third tier of the Premier League
Yeah
And it just got back into the Premier League like what 2014 or something like that
Yeah
And the closest they ever even came to a championship was like in 1929 when they came in second place
That was the closest they ever came
They didn't want to take second place
No 1929
Oh like way way back then
Oh in 1929 they might have in second place
Yeah
That's the closest they ever came to to glory
Yeah
It's a club's been around for 125 years
Whoa
And they won and it's you listen
Here are the teams that are in the league
Chelsea
Manchester United
Manchester City
Arsenal
I mean these are juggernaut global like names with all these teams have huge stars on them
All star
And you don't know anybody from over now you do
Now you know Jamie Vardy
Jamie Vardy and
That's another thing that's really cool too is like you know we always Gilbert and I always talk about the journeyman type of athlete
Yeah
And this is a guy who is basically he's relatively unknown
Do you know how old he is?
29
He's a late bloomer
He's at the end oh wow
Well no but now he is playing for the England national team
And then Mara is too right
Yeah and then another guy Drinkwater
He's their midfielder
That's his actual name by the way
Drinkwater
Drinkwater
Drinkwater
Drinkwater
Drinkwater
Yeah
And this was a club like I think in 2002 was going to be dissolved as a team altogether
And I think like Gary Lineker or something like put the money out to save the team
It's pretty amazing
It's an amazing thing
And so do you think that it's the coach Claudio
Or do you think it's
I just think that it's just one of those things where Claudio Reuneri used to manage Chelsea
Athletic with Madrid
But he's been fired and sacked from every club he's ever played
But he does better when there's no stars on this team
No egos probably
Yeah he's able to like mold it when there's no egos
But if you had like Amber Verbicic or Rooney or that type of guy on the team I don't think they would have won
Okay so what are you how do you explain a guy like Ibra who who never stays in the club for more than like let's say two seasons
Like what's his deal
He wants to you know and this is not a joke
He wants to suck different kinds of dicks
You don't remember every
Yeah if you don't know just look up the photo
Google image
Google, Zlatan, Ibra Verbicic
He's just European
Gerard Piquet I don't give a fuck
No meet me at my car so I can hug you from the back
Hold your hands in your twine
Sweetie you and Gilbert do far worse things than that
No we don't
Yes behind my back I've caught you guys love glaring at each other
That's just bro glaring
That's bro glaring
I've seen you hump him on the beanbag
That's bro humping
That's called wrestling
That's wrestling
That's not bro humping
My pants down yes
It's called Roman Greek wrestling
It's more of a primitive style of wrestling
That was sex
That was actual intercourse
Coitus
What I do with Gilbert though is through laughs
Domination
I do it for domination power and laughs
I love how comedy allows us to be super gay
Right
But what Zlatan and Gerard Piquet did was
They did it in an alleyway when they knew no one was around
And a photographer snuck back there
They got caught
And he took a photo
Right so that's a little different
I don't think that
They're athletes
Okay anytime you're a celebrity as big as Piquet or Zlatan
When you step out of your house
You are very much aware that you're unsafe from the lenses
Even if you're inside the house
There's a good chance that somebody has their lenses on you
So I don't think that they would be that reckless
If they were trying to keep this like gay love affair
I'm just gonna give you an example
If Charlie Finn right got shot in the dick
Okay
So specific
Right
And he's like
I need
You know what I mean
I need a tourniquet around my dick
Right
And I'm the only one around
I'm gonna just be like
I love you dude
You're not gonna save me
No
You're gonna let Charlie's dick just bleed
Just in case that
Like I put
And then
The tourniquet on
And then a photographer captures it
I don't want to risk that
Bobby does
50 shades of gray
Yeah
Charlie Finn
Charlie's dad
You know
Same with Gilbert
In the even the ass
Suck the venom in the venom out
I'm gonna like
You're gonna die
Okay what if a snake bit me like
Right between the hip
And my right butt cheek
Nope
That's the whole cheek
Exactly
You're dead
I have a big butt check
That's my point
The only way I would suck venom out of your hand
Your hand maybe
My hand
Yeah
Not the face
Hold on
That's a little gayer
When you're like
You look like you're kissing a man's hand
Versus like kissing his ass
Not the top of the hand
The pump
Yeah the pump
Bobby suck my hand
Okay you're right
You'd be dead
You'd be dead
You'd be dead
What area would it
Yeah there would probably be no area
Like maybe the forearm
Not even the forearm
No
It's like okay
Eric Griffith
Eric Griffith's about to die
From a venomous snake
Yeah
On the forearm
You're not gonna suck it
No
He's dead
Eric I hope you hear this
He's a dead man
And that's the message I want to say
This is a lot on
You're dead
That was some fucking shady shit
Interesting
Yeah for sure
Yeah for sure
I don't know
I like guys sucking each other
If a cobra bit me in the dick
Would you suck the venom out
Be real though
Like where are they
It depends on the dick
I'll be honest
I'll tell you where
I've already talked about this
With many people
Really?
If it's on your
Like on the head
Hey for sure kill yourself
I'm not sucking it
The stem
If it's
Well it's called the shaft
The shaft
It's not a plant
It's not called a plant
The balls are not leaves
Yeah
I would not do the shaft
But if my best friend
Was bleeding in the pubic area
And he was shaved
I'd do it
You guys are not clutch people man
You guys aren't clutch friends
Hey don't take me on a camping trip
I don't camp
Not it is this motherfucker
Good
You don't even know how to put a steak through it
Okay well
I'll cook a steak
You guys are in clutch friends
I don't know
What do you mean
I hope to never get bit by a barber
Well you take showers with your
With your stern shit
I take showers with all my girlfriends
That's weird
Like we literally share underwear
We've been sharing underwear for 15 years
That's the difference between men and women
It's like George
I would
Would you ever take a shower with me
What
Pause
Why'd you pause
Hey George be honest now
Yeah be real
You're a comedy scene possibly
No I would do it for laughs
Yeah but if there was no cameras
No cameras
I feel dirty
And I want to conserve water
You want to take a shower with me
I want to conserve water
It's like with girls
We use it as a time
To like talk and discuss
World politics
You can't do that on a couch
Yeah there's called tables
Yeah
So cafes
Yeah but we like to look at each other's body parts
And kind of like compare
Yeah
Like the amount of
Nope
No way
We pluck each other's nipple hairs
Like me and Jenna
Totally pluck each other's nipple hairs
Yeah
You know what though
In a war situation if you
In a war situation if you
Like you know a bomb went off
And you did a tourniquet around your leg
I would put one around your leg
Yeah
So that's where my love
Let's hope the bullet hits your leg
And no other part
Someone holds a gun
I'm like no don't shoot my chest
Hit my leg
Bobby will always save me
Hit my leg
Yeah
You're fucked otherwise
Scenario for you
Obviously you would suck the venom
Out of any female
I would suck the venom
Out of a stranger's dick
Whoa
Whoa
You have a
Well you're
Alright
It was too aggressive
I take that back
Magic Johnson's dick
But I would
Would you suck
Okay Magic Johnson
Right
Yeah
Gets bit by a viper on his dick
Yeah
Would you suck the venom out
Is he like on the verge of death
Yes
Is venom in his
Is venom in his dick
Yeah
Would you call or text Bobby
He doesn't have like seminal fluid
He's got hiv babe
I know but I'm not going to get in unless there's like
Blood contact
And the chances of actually like sucking
Like he's not nutting in my mouth
Let me ask you this
The odds of you getting AIDS
From sucking the venom out of somebody's
Dick that has HIV
What is the odds you think
Even if there's a 0.05% chance
I ain't doing it
But look
Magic Johnson is
So is basically
A billionaire
HIV free
Yeah
I'd be more afraid to suck your dick
Right
Every day I just
Pray
Also you know with
Magic Johnson's dick
I would probably do it
And if I got the hip
I'll be like
Hey dude
Like
Can you pay me
I have HIV now
And you're a billionaire
So you know
Compensation
What's up
What's up
You're a legend
And speaking of Magic Johnson
Holy fuck
I saw a show yesterday
Okay first of all
Kalala has
She puts shit on
Shut the fuck up baby
Don't put your hand
In front of my face right now
All right
Suck the blood out of my hand
I've never had
E-television
On my fucking television
It's always on when I'm here
It's not in my
I know but it's because
She puts it on
Listen
She loves E-television
I don't love E-television
Well Filipinos love reality
There are some things
No I just like to
Be to know everything
That's going on
Like I'll go from CNN
To E
And I'll skip around us
Yeah and sports
And everything
But it just so happened
That E was on
I was cooking dinner
I wasn't even watching the show
But there's a show out there
Apparently called
The Rich Kids of Beverly Hills
And one of the
One of the people in it
Is Magic Johnson's son
And Bobby was just like
His daughter you mean
Basically
I mean this
I'm not
A queen though
Like but very fabulous
I have to give it up to them
He's very fabulous
Oh
Very fabulous
Gotcha
He lost a bunch of weight
Yeah he recently lost
But he is full blown
You know what I mean
And nothing against gay people
I'm going to throw that out right now
Gay or transgender is
No he's not
He's not transgender
He's not
But he is
Like
Mythologically gay
Like what I'm saying is that
If you were in Middle Earth
And you were in a forest
A dark forest
And Aragorn said
Hey don't go in that forest
Because there's these mythological
Gays that live there
You wouldn't even know what he
Mean
What he meant by that
And then you went in there
And then you would see like
Dust
Fairy dust
Right
And then maybe hear like
Ethereal music
And then Magic Johnson's
Fucking son would come out
Of the fucking
From a tree
That's how
The smoothest face
I look at that
I mean mascara
It looks mythical
Yeah
In a good way
Yeah he's pretty fabulous
Yeah
But
He was just shocked
I think he was like
I'm not just shocked by it
I just want to throw something out
And it might be controversial
What I'm saying
Once again this episode
Might get pulled down
This episode
You know what
I'm gonna say this episode
Will get pulled down
I apologize in advance
I'm just raising a question
Alright
Man
No just listen
I already know what he's gonna say
Can I just say it
So it doesn't sound as awful
Coming out
Yeah
It's probably not gonna be
The thing I'm gonna say
But say anyway
If I'm correct tell me
Yeah go ahead
You think that
You have a theory now
Yes
That
Because his son is gay
Yes
That Magic Johnson
Probably caught HIV
From a man
Because he's probably gay
And genetically
His son is gay also
It is a theory
I told you
That's exactly
What do you think
It is a theory
I'm not wrong
Yeah because
Yeah but cause
Cause I'm gonna say this
Okay
It's not as if Magic Johnson's
Son is
Oh man
Like
I work at Enterprise
And I just happen to be gay
I'm talking about the car service
No whatever
He's just a regular guy
Oh
He happens to be gay
He's
You know what I mean
This dude is
Just
You can't
He'll never get a regular job anywhere
That's how gay he is
What is this
I'm gonna defend
I'll defend the whole community
To say this
Not true
Am I in trouble
What you're saying is
Am I in trouble
In a territory than your theory
You're saying
Being outwardly gay
And being proud
And if a man
Is a feminine
Or this and that
That he's unhirable
That's basically
What you said
So retract
Quickly
Retract
And have you seen Hollywood
They're killing the game right now
Yeah baby
Gays run Hollywood
So fucking watch your mouth
And retract that shit
Right now
I'm gonna say this
Brian Singer
Brian Singer
Yeah
Right
He's gay
by the comedy store yeah this is three or four years ago and he was with a
bunch of guys we all know that Brian Singer is gay right but yeah he was
wearing he just seemed like a regular guy that's fine why do gay anybody can
be any my agent at CAA right I'm not gonna name the name yeah let's not do
I'm not gonna do that out of him is gay yeah right right I'm saying that
magic chances kid is mythologically gay you know what that's a compliment I
think so yeah he's a fabulous all right but because he's so fabulous right he
got that gene from somewhere I think
Bill not the science guy oh my god I am you know what dude I am gonna get so much
trouble for this episode already no you're not I am okay how many gay friends
you have I have a lot boom done I and I've done some gay shit myself he's
already admitted it I've sucked dick myself everyone knows that he
specifically chose a gay agent I know well that was a lot of to me you know
the system but yeah but I have listen I have my my manager Abby is Jew she's
Jewish she's Jew okay yeah I love her I went to Israel I love I love Jews my
my agent and my name's name is gay I love the guy yeah right and I have
comic friends they're gay I love them now you're just really trying to I'm not
over concept I'm just saying he does I think that magic Johnson is gay that
was it I don't know why we even better I mean I'm I just realized this about
myself when I was younger I used to be so rigid about oh I could never have sex
with a guy who you know who had ever been with another guy but as I'm getting
older the more open a man is to sleeping with another man the more attracted I
am to him the more the closer that he is to this on a scale to being like
bisexual the more I in my mind for some reason that translates to him being
sexually free and it's attractive to me interesting dude dude I've been in
situations as an adult right okay I'm gonna throw names out right I don't
care I don't care or not right or not all right I've been in situations with
another male comic yeah with one girl and been in a sexual situation gangbang
that's not and told the story though yeah yeah no I've never named names I've
been in many situations right yeah one of them being was this guy named oh god
why do you guys look at me like I'm gonna because I'm nervous man right Mike
Burton very funny comic is he I'm not gonna name the girl though because it's
humiliating okay so she's well known yeah and we did a show once Mike Burton
goes to the girl hey would you ever fuck me and Bobby at the same time and she
goes I would right so then we went to his house right and we were all naked and
it was a fucking blast magical I laughed so hard should we all laugh just like
he's eating her out I'm jerking off and we're laughing like school kids right at
one point one point he walked by me I slept his ass you know I mean and I'm
cool with that yeah right I did it with my friend Aaron and Brian I already
talked about that yeah you mean I love I've seen their penises I give them
thumbs up right if they want to reach around I would probably have done it
yeah yeah just for fun all right I have nothing against it all right I'm a
liberal I am yeah there's nothing conservative about me okay I believe in
all the social issues I believe in just shut the fuck up immigration right gay
marriage I agree okay I believe in a woman's right to choose alright I believe
in all that Magic Johnson is gay I think we got the title of our episode am I
in trouble for saying that no that's a theory that's an opinion it's a theory
and an opinion all that's fine everything is alleged everything we say on
it's alleged yeah I'll make believe I just ruined the night huh no it's very
interesting when you guys are just speechless you guys are looking on the
ground like oh my god we didn't get fucking stupid no I'm thinking like damn
I didn't know Maggie Johnson was gay do you think that Magic Johnson in his in
just swimming in his billions of dollars would care who that what the fuck
came out of your mouth never unless it was a lifetime body man TV fan I partake
in his establishments like 24-hour fitness no you don't that's not no
no there's a step he owns a Starbucks by the airport and I've been there 30 times
I've actually written jokes there and I enjoy it oh right he has all he owns
that whole like block of stores all right I'm a huge Magic Johnson fan
between him and Larry Bird what position did Magic Johnson play Center for
Doug damn no nope right wing different sport different sport different sport
the initials are PG defense of lineman you know we'll just say baby PG PG
postcard very close guard with PG you said parental guard
postcard boy boy position card very close point guard yeah and that's why
him and Magic Johnson are close yeah yeah you know exactly anyway I really
like that reality show that he's on he couldn't stop watching it change it he
watched two back-to-back episodes around his son or the family I'm like looking
at the picture not at all and there's another a rich a rich chink lady what's
her name Dorothy Wang who the hell is that she's she's like an heiress to like
some Chinese billionaire she's chubby chink chink yeah and she yeah she's you
know I mean but she's a human you know I mean yeah I mean I mean and I mean I just
you listen I was born into you know my parents are working class you know I mean
if you look at my dad's hands and my mom's hands give scars and calces on them
okay so I don't you know I I'm a voyeur when I'm watching shows like this but
there is a part of me that goes I I don't give a fucking I and I kind of hate
you guys yeah but you watch two episodes I know because it's mesmerizing to me
reality man because it's so far away from your own life and I think that's why
that's part of the attraction is that it is such a stark difference from all of
our lives I mean these people are living you know whatever grandiose fantasies we
have a what a life what a life we want they're living it you're just spending
money here and there and having no regard for for any of that you know like
never having to worry when their next meal is yeah that's such a luxury yeah
but it's also like they do things that I'm like why would you do that you know
like they go to these like like the way they dress first of all you know I mean
like just hit black hammer pants with gold trimmings you mean in glitter and
they just walk out and they and with these you know Versace bags and they walk
around it's like I don't know if I had money I would look like a heroin addict
I mean the reason why is because you know I mean I think like when dudes are
like like especially rock stars why I like them rock stars have millions of
dollars you know I mean and yet they look you mean like they just slept in a
fucking ditch I like that whole thing aren't they like similar with fashion
though like they were like jewelry and like Steven Tyler well not my the rock
stars I like oh yeah I mean I guess there are those you know like what's his
name Chris from Coldplay what's his name Chris Martin yeah he looks like a
regular dude right pretty standard white guys for like shimmery that's different
that's different though who's an enigma he has an enigma and he here's what it is
he has the talent to back it you know me Michael Jackson could wear whatever he
wants because number one he's a super talent yeah dance singing right
everything super talent I'm not kidding you I believe that I believe that Prince
Michael Jackson they're just certain people that are just you know me and
untouchable you go that's why he can go I'm just gonna wear one silver glove
yeah like if I did that before a show you'd say don't do it don't do it or
like where's the second one yeah and I wouldn't be able to back it I'd like
you're right sweetie here he can you know I'm gonna wear pants that are just kind
of like that you know what you call him him to hear yeah no what Michael Jackson
remember you can see all of sock I don't know those are called I don't even know
that's why no one does it because you know what yeah right so it's like yeah
he kid those guys can back it but when like Michael Jackson's son does it right
you're just kind of going not Michael Jackson son Michael magic Johnson son
does it because like you're born into money like you know I mean and you're
dressed like that it's like you don't have the talent the back it's weird but
that's another thing that I think that people born into money go through is
that even if they become successful and hard-working eventually and they do
generate their own money still people are gonna be like well yeah no we're set up
for success no nope yeah Anderson Cooper Anderson Cooper the reason he is
unlike the rest is because he physically put he put his body in harm's way
during multiple many that's my point my point is Anderson Cooper Cooper Cooper
was raised with money wealth he's the son of Gloria Vanderbilt Vanderbilt right
and I didn't even know that right right and he created he became one of the
biggest newscasters in the world not because beloved and loved I love the
dude yeah I mean I like that other guy from MSNBC too yeah baby I knew is gonna
right I have to say that in my opinion Rachel Maddox is the best one of the
most brilliant or like the smartest funny to I person on television I
tease her but I used to listen to her on NPR or whatever she had her own show
she was it was it one of those it was an MPI was one of those things smaller show
than it was a show that she had on she started on the radio the radio yeah and
I used to listen to it all time didn't know what she looked like I loved her
she's the best and a teaser but that's just a joke you know that right but so
Anderson Cooper I feel like you mean created a life you I mean and his own
thing you know yeah because he he he took on a job that most people respect
which is like being you know a journalist and especially in the time
that he started becoming a known journalist it was an it's like a war
torn time right so you go to like war torn areas and put his body on the line
but not it's just the profession he chose made him more even Michael Douglas
okay like Kirk Douglas was a huge actor Michael Douglas became an actor he's
very good I think yeah and talented and I don't feel like that was nephazitism
okay I mean it was easier to get in I guess because you know obviously you
know he has access to agents and managers like you can submit your tape or
whatever or headshot you know when you first moved to LA I like I didn't know
anybody so it took me six years to even get to the point where I could even give
anyone anything yeah right so in that sense but there's a lot of actors that
had famous parents you know I mean that I feel like proved you know because
acting is tough Chris Delia right Delia is a little one Delia Chris Delia I
remember him going up every single night at the ha ha cafe in the belly room for
years every fucking night and he didn't you know his there's absolutely no
nephazitism in that at all because if you see Chris Delia at all just once or
even if he enters a room and if you didn't know who the hell he was yeah
you would think oh who is that guy I guess he does have that presence about
him yeah and that's undeniable across the board and I think that his dad Bill
Delia who's a producer I think they raised him in the right way to give him
that confidence or whatever because Bill's a you know when he Bill walks into
a room you know you you go oh holy shit I mean you know that he's a producer but
there's just something and even his brother Matt and aura yeah there's just
an aura about that family right I think it's over the way you're raised with
confidence or whatnot but I think that certain people so what I'm saying to
Magic Johnson's kid is is that basically at the end of the day is you're gonna have
to work hard to create you know because in the in the in the reality show he's
trying to figure out what brand am I gonna do am I gonna be in turn I mean
like you know I mean fashion or am I gonna do it's like we talked about this
so like if Bobby and I like raise our kid and let's say let's suppose down the
road we let's say we become like multi-millionaires we talked about this
and we always say like hell no like that kid's gonna work for their first car
they're gonna work for everything they're not gonna live with us also I'm not
famous no I'm just saying that I'm not I'm not like magic Johnson but no I'm
not even remotely that if you I'm nowhere near any of that people are
yelling George is a pink dick yeah randomly yeah I mean but these are like
my people that's fine okay but just in terms of grand scheme of things I'm not
even on the radar so I feel like even if I raise my kids my kids will be like I
don't know what my dad does or whatever my dad's always at home playing video games
yeah like Dana Carvey hmm he started a family up in the Bay Area and his kids
are now stand-ups I didn't know that yet he does the road and his kids open for
them and stuff that's cool and he raises kids good I mean they grew up in the
suburbs and he had to leave LA yeah I feel like Al magical you know is doing
the right thing because I've met his kids his kids are like completely like
grounded and cute and smart you know I mean it's like him and his wife did a
good job I don't know what the women's is these kids are like but how about this
we don't talk about anyone's kids because that's a very sensitive subject
that's when people come to their great kids I loved Steve entry and his wife
don't start talking about who's kids you don't know his kids are amazing doesn't
like max I never met them that's all I mean some some some some friends of mine
won't introduce me to their kids because in fear safety that I'm what yeah I'm
sorry I really believe it's safety what do you mean like I experiment like I
Baron holds yeah dear friend of mine yes kids he'll probably never introduce me
to his kids because he saw the way I behaved when we're on mad TV like you
were bad influence I shit in this dressing room yeah I shit in dick
basutes the executive producers dressing room you know me I used to you
stick firecrackers in my butthole like I used to say that's dangerous I'm
hearing that it's very dangerous no those little ones sparklers yeah it's a
sparkler no no those little ones with oh little tiny ones the one like the
whistle bombs yeah boom yeah oh lord Jesus Christ man that is dangerous baby
yeah you have a prolapse they have a pig sock man no no I think that's my I'm
telling right now I think I'm an X-men and I think my power is my muscle on
my butthole is like adamantian steel damn impenetrable it's unpenetrable oh
bullshit I've definitely put a long finger up there yeah but your fingers are
ET fingers and they're skinny and weird I just wanted a quick scenario hard and dry
scenario I didn't I'm professor Xavier you're coming to my mansion real hello
child this is your power my power is is that I have a very strong muscle it's
made out of metal not found on this planet Wolverine get in here yeah right
and then you ask me ask me well how would that be used what's your name what
what's your name met ring ring the ring how would we use that in battle for
fighting the magneto well if there is any bad X-men that are gay okay I'll lure
them into bed and then they'll stick their penis in my butthole I'll snap them
off oh yes we need someone like you here at the X-men Academy thank you and
seeing thank you thank you hi I'm ring he did something so embarrassing last
week so Bobby was flew to Atlanta last week oh I know this what he started
bragging about oh me and Steve Ioki your friends now and we like we've been
texting blah blah blah they ran into each other at the airport yeah and what
happened at the airport or outside the hotel the hotel I'm sorry could I tell
the story I'll tell the story and so he I mean like the whole his whole message
to me like one after the other like yeah so like daddy's got his digits like as
if he's bragging to me because you're a huge Steve Aoki fan oh no I went to like
one of his shows and I was in Barcelona but then I was like yeah I saw his a fan
so I said I said to him oh I saw him once when I was in Barcelona right and so
he texted me back he's like oh yeah but like do you have his digits are you
going to breakfast with him tomorrow I'm like come on motherfucker like I'm not
trying he's trying to like brag about this brand new friendship he created right
and so I guess him he screen-shotted a conversation between me and Steve Ioki
says it says hey dude so glad I ran into you and Bobby goes hey man glad we're
friends he screen-shotted that with the intent to send it to me to show it show
to me as proof that they're now friends right instead he sent that screen shot
back to Steve Ioki follow a question that's ridiculous how did you what did
you do I don't know by or what I try to as I send it I realized I did it and I
try to like click back onto the thing you could delete it if you can delete it
like somehow like not how capture it between that and the cloud Bobby tries
to beat the club yeah but did it it was already sent so then I started kind of
sweating in my face oh damn and I just went ha ha ha I have I don't know where
phone us but I go ha ha and I told him the truth I meant to send that to my
girlfriend I sent it to you how embarrassing and he said and he goes
that's cool dude he kind of laughed it off but then it never I think we're done
her relationship I think he's thinking like oh my god oh my god he's not safe
I'm not safe yeah yeah yes we're not going to hakasan we're not going to
hakasan yeah you blew you blew it baby yeah but did we do a podcast since I've
been to Atlanta no tell us about Atlanta no I mean hold on we did it Friday and
then you don't talk about what you were doing there what I could say your
interaction just say you you probably signed an NDA no I didn't oh yeah you did
no I can say that I did a movie right yeah you can say that with with the two
people yeah I guess I don't know I did a movie yeah okay go ahead I'm not gonna
tell him what the movie is called yeah I did a scene in a movie I can do I think
I can do it I can do it I did it one scene in a movie and they flew me out
there with Zach Galvanakis and John Hamm and I worked two days with them and I
just want to say that literally it was the nicest two guys I could ever work
with he was like no like I because I didn't know I knew I know Zach I didn't
know John Hamm and then I walked on to the set and he was sitting there on this
booth and he smiles at me and he stood up and he goes mr. Lee and he shook my
hand and I went oh my god I love this guy already yeah and he just they were
just so cool for two days have you worked with them before no man I'm on the
outskirts of you know me I got nothing going I love John Hamm she loved I love
him because I watched all of Mad Men so I'm in love with Don Draper yeah in love
I was telling Bobby it's like if you give me permission like I'll just I'll show
John Hamm 200% like I've only ever show him like 30% these days of sexuality
sexual go past 100 I can go 200 on John Hamm just terrifying and you know what
because John Hamm is such a nice guy and he's just so lovely that I'd let her do
it come on me that hurts my feelings now that you allow me make it a little
interesting for me and tell me no no no you can't do it I'll watch I'll trick off
my name is ring I'm ready have you ever crossed past the sack and stand up or
different yeah yeah oh so you did I do I remember I remember one time I hated them
oh what's the story about I remember I was a doorman at the comedy store you
were a doorman in Hollywood no I worked for years I just thought you just to
stand up no I was a doorman and I that was the year where I couldn't get up at
all so for 12 months they wouldn't put me on that stage at all uh-huh and I
remember one night I was working the door and they did a Montreal comedy
showcase there in the OR and Zach was one of them he crushed it and he and he
went to Montreal that year just relax yeah and remember driving home going you
know I mean you know that whole fucking yeah yeah but then later um yeah we were
frank we're friends he's a cool dude you know but um and then Greg Matola they
got to directed it was really nice although he did cut me out of Paul you
were in the extended version I was in the extended version oh really I have to
watch the thanks for putting me back into the movie it's so embarrassing when
you're like doing scene in a movie they cut you out and then you have to tell
you tell people I'm in this and then people go see it like no you were no
you're not and then you have to go oh you know wait for the blu-ray yeah that
happened to my friend Jamie my friend Jamie was in the movie Godzilla not the
new one but the really old one with Matthew Roderick I like that oh right
that one yeah I like that one a lot I liked it because I watched it when I was
like okay oh so yeah that was all right I love it kind of disaster I like the new
one too with you was great yeah that's great but I said this name the other
one was not moto it was some what are you talking about because there is not just
Godzilla there was another one the flying one oh like the moth mothra was
that's not mothra I forgot what it's called my friend Jamie was in the first
one he played a military guy yeah he had a name and everything in it and that he
they took he cut cut completely cut out of the movie but no one told them oh they
didn't say anything now they don't say anything shit they don't say call you
go we cut you out of the movie oh no you just don't get invited in the fucking
premiere you know I mean and then you watch the movie you're not in it anyway
he brought a date to see Godzilla and halfway during the movie he realizes
oh my god I don't think I'm in this movie so there's a scene maybe toward the
end of the movie where these you know pilots are like you know I mean there
are jet pilots and they're trying to kill Godzilla and they have masks over their
face he said he was a pilot yeah and he goes there I am he looked at that oh my
yeah she goes oh yeah like it was just some white dude and thing goes that's
me what do you also supposed to do I don't know you don't walk out what would
you do lie also no I would probably turn to my dango I don't think you know what
you think I would do I think you would lie to win I think you wouldn't that's
me I'm Godzilla I'm in the suit I'm in it yeah I did all the stunt work and
everything and I just want to say you know what also I'm depressed about is
there are no Asian superheroes at all that I can ever be in dude really quick
we were talking about this yeah we're talking about Bobby would be because
the apocalypse is coming soon there's no ring you put Olivia what can Bobby be
in an X-Men movie like think about all the characters there's only one one guy
and I'm just not the type no his name is a Sunfire fire is he the ninja no he's
um who's he's an X-Men that was created probably in the early 80s Japanese
dude and he was he'd fly he was he was like kind of like Pyro but he's on fire
but he I don't know I mean that's the only Asian X-Men I know we have chance
for a human actually 2017 what in humans what's that it's Marvel Studios
version of X-Men because they can't use X-Men because it's owned by Fox so it's
like just mutants but they're calling it in humans but are there are Asian ones
there's so many characters I think they're just almost the Asian X-Men my
goal is when they make a Teen Titans I'm going for Beast Boy he's ethically
he's ethically ambiguous and he transforms into animals okay this time
eight oh wait there's a list of Asian superheroes on Wikipedia yeah but Olivia
Mons Asian there's a lot of them yeah but she's half she's also like a hot chick I'm talking about body being there is
um do an Asian Kingpin Cassandra Kane from Batgirl and Batman don't know that
Cassie Chan Power Rangers universe that's Grace Choi from the outsiders what
the fuck is it that's not even comic books anybody it's just anyone that's
anybody yeah I do you believe from X-Men we know her yeah speaking of the R&D Asians I watched what
Greece live you know like the reboot of Greece but it was like a live show with
um Vanessa Hudgens and I think that yeah so anyway so I didn't know that I
didn't know if they were gonna go word-for-word exactly the same as the
original Greece because there's one particular line that Bobby hates from
the original Greece I'm gonna just kind of explain it yeah well I don't know the
line I'm gonna tell you the line set the mood okay I'm gonna sit up because I
really I adamantly believe that this scarred me yeah as a child yes I was at
a slumber party at my friend Bess's house and there was I was a kid we had a
girls house yeah but there was like other boy I mean it was just like a not
slumber party but it was like a party damn you're lucky then jeez what was it
anyway yeah sorry and there was a bunch of kids sitting around and they put on
Greece yeah okay mm-hmm there's a scene in Greece during the slumber party scene
where one of the women goes this is my boyfriend he he's in Korea and the girls
go oh you're dating a Korean she has no silly he's in the Marines that's
offensive he's not only offensive I imagine being a Korean kid in front of
a bunch of white girls and all your friends right and then kind of looking at
the screen going I'm disgusting they all look at you yeah I'm Chinese I think
that was a slam on every Asian yeah that was on every Asian so I thought that the
new Greece live with it cuz I mean they had a black girl as cherry yeah I think
it was cherry or they you know they had definitely different and Vanessa right
so I thought oh for sure they're gonna ask that line they didn't what did they
kept it live live we saw it live so he specifically wanted me just to fast
forward to that part go to the slumber party sure enough it was they didn't
take it out surprise they didn't change it and it was the and it was the black
girls character which is cherry she was like ill like so they give it to her so
it's like safe by diversity yeah diversity good job I should have had me in
the closet I wouldn't date you either Bobby Lee comes out singing I wouldn't
date you either yeah yeah a Korean man yeah I mean just the nerve of white
people George George you fucking wrote that shit didn't you George listen to
me man that I mean it's like you know Asian men in in Hollywood are not
sexual beings we've never been identified you know as sexual beings were
and women have always been exotic in front of white old executives you know
that make decisions let's have a hot Asian chick in this yeah but like with
guys I mean when's the last time you saw an Asian guy an American movie have
sex with anybody so that's what I like about the unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt is
that her love interest is an Asian guy I don't like that because it's Tina Fey
is getting away with why did why did you have to have an accent because he's an
actual like fob like he is an immigrant and that's why he's here in the United
States illegally that's the character yeah but didn't have to it's like it
doesn't fucking matter just as long as she he gets the fuck a white chicken yeah
and she's like in love with him so I like that at the very least look what
does accent have anything to do with that fucker no cuz Stephen Yon has the
amazing role he's got all that's right he'd know that he has had plays it plays
himself you're right you're right you're right so Stephen Yoon yeah it had that's
a good thing yeah that's a good thing fucks are all the time breakable in
Kimmy shit that's a good thing right what about your friend from a fast
furious he fucks like that was Gal Gadot the Wonder Woman Brian T no no the
other one Sun Sun Kang yeah he fucks on a movie it's fast and furious he does
they're a love interest well there you go I didn't know that hey hang fuck maybe
they're just not gonna cast you as the hot Asian guy but they are casting hot
Asian guys as leading men you're just not it better kiss him right now come
here baby whoo not even the hands okay baby okay I'm gonna say this okay I do
kiss somebody on screen we can't say it though right do we cannot say that one
you can't say what I'm gonna say right now beautiful blonde though a beautiful
blonde white lady I kiss her on screen a list so she's a list too so sweetie
now I'm gonna go fuck yourself hey I was proud of you no but you just you know
I mean I just proved to you that I did do it he's on that list with Stephen Yoon
there we go son okay you are you are a leading man yeah I mean she's a lesbian
she's a lesbian she really is a lesbian can you tickle yourself no I have no
feeling try no try tickling yourself why can you tickle yourself no why can you
make yourself like because that a new study says that people who can tickle
themselves are probably schizophrenic oh Jesus yeah I can't tickle myself yeah
thank god like sometimes when I brush my fingers across the side of my flank
here I do kind of get a little tickly feeling well you're saying to me right
now because they have different personalities they're like Frank's doing
it is that what it is Jimmy stop schizophrenia is not multiple personality
disorder schizophrenia is just is having like auditory visual hallucinations
they're just saying there's a drug there's a connection probably because
you're disassociating from from like a reality so you probably don't maybe see
your hand as your own or you're probably disassociated from some so let me ask
you this so schizophrenics don't ever believe there's somebody else I think
that they can be convinced that they are somebody else through like the auditory
hallucinations the voices that they hear right yeah so they also have they
also smell things that aren't there oh so they see they hear things that aren't
there they smell things that aren't there they feel things that aren't there so
maybe they can be convinced that their hand isn't theirs and they can tickle
themselves right when what's the thing where they have multiple multiple
personalities that's called multiple personality disorder oh I see that's
an action they never used broad umbrella to a broad umbrella yeah like that Harvey
Dent have two faces but per literal two face yeah we had two different personnel
no yeah probably multiple personality but I think that's like through trauma like
that isn't something that was like genetic right it was through like situations
that he eventually right like a traumatic event can trigger or something oh
totally yeah I mean you know they always say like you know schizophrenia will
usually manifest itself like in in men especially when their teenagers are like
early 20s and in women early 20s and like usually around that range but I knew
somebody that we actually met outside of your show in San Jose and I think the
death of her a death of her son threw her into schizophrenia like full blown to
like she actually had to be like committed like something traumatic like
that will totally change your circuitry like that's just yeah I mean I'm going
to tell you something right now there's a commercial running with the I know what
the commercial is but my friend Jill's in it this is commercial actress named
Jill Benjamin that's in it her and I witnessed a death really in Silver Lake
tell us about it I was at her house one night it was like two in the morning and
we're just talking on her porch and we hear this explosion we run down and a car
of four people had hit a wall like any miles per hour or whatever and all you
could see is it didn't look like a car it looked like a sardine like a sardine
can yeah and one of the girl a girl was in the car and her sister was in another
car she gets out like she's screaming and the ambulance and all that stuff came
and they were dead and I never saw Jill again after that the only reason why I'm
reminded of it is because of that commercial commercial and I think that
when you witness a traumatic event with somebody yeah that you just don't
everyone see that person it's all about associations right so everything that we
see everything that we hear we build associations in our brain and so she
associates that traumatic event which is probably traumatic for you with your
face yeah so yeah I wouldn't like we literally have not even said hi to each
other ever since then and yeah it's really weird and and when I know her
name isn't Jill Benjamin it's Jill Alexander yeah that's her and she's
really a talented yeah you mean actress all right we were friends yeah but ever
since that's a good look one moment yeah we just became I get that because when
Jessica and I were driving to Vegas one time and we were going about 90 miles an
hour we were speeding and she spun out of control and so we spun out of control
so badly that we we veered like six lanes over we didn't had any car then but we
were moving backwards onto oncoming traffic on a truck lane and you know
they say like your brain releases like DMT like I don't know if my brain
released a little bit of it because as we were spinning out of control Jessica
was on the wheel like this and she was screaming like what the fuck and
apparently what I did you know I'm such a panicky person usually I would
probably be freaked out as hell apparently like I held her by the arm
and I and I looked her in the eye and I said hey it's okay like I was completely
calm hey wrong time to say that yeah but like completely calm as if like I've
already accepted that my my death but then the reason I okay so and and I had
been wearing this perfume by Cascada and to this day I cannot so much as smell
anything remotely close to that because I so and neither can she and we just drove
to Vegas and nothing happened we just spun out of control we actually ended
up on dirt we didn't flip over thank God but in that moment of like me accept
accepting my own death I associate with that scent and I cannot that scent would
throw me into a full panic wow that's weird so if you and I are in a plane yeah
sitting next to each other and it's going down yeah you would you would calm
down and go hey Bob I don't know okay Bobby's freaking out and like you just
shit yeah I mean stealing into my own face because of fear I honestly don't
know because I'm not I'm somebody who freaks the fuck out yeah I think I think
under that kind of pressure that you'd be able to calm down and help me through
it because I'm gonna tell you right now that would I would free I don't I wouldn't
calm down I would be that guy screaming yeah you know just screaming yeah yeah I
think that you would hold my hand and look at me good it's okay but there is
something physiologically wrong with me the reason my hands are always sweating
yeah like they're you know I've seen doctors about this my hands are
constantly sweating my feet are constantly sweating is because my fight
or flight response so as humans you have your sympathetic response which is you
know if you're feeling a sense of impending danger or you need to be
alerted you're sympathetic your heart rate goes up your blood pressure goes up
your senses are heightened right that's your sympathetic response yeah and it's
supposed to go on when necessary if like you know if you feel like a fear for
your safety or things like that and it's supposed to turn off yeah apparently
mine doesn't turn off that's why my heart rate my baseline is always high my
hands are always sweating power baby what the hell is that a power like I'm
an anxious ball of flesh hello I'm professor man what is your name
sweats oh you can bunk with ring by yourself you guys are in a separate
building alone you fucking weird that's funny that's a good one ring and sweats
you could I tell you another event that just triggered another memory yeah when
I was I'm sorry did you just fart you've been doing all this time
haven't you yeah I never smell them very vegetables yeah that's good
healthy but when I was 21 years old I was at an A meeting in La Jolla and what
they call it the winter circles on a Wednesday night and I was sitting there
during an A meeting and then I looked to my left and the guy next to me was dead
what I mean what I swear to God the guy next to me was dead and how did you know
because the lady next to him screamed oh my god and then this is what they did
they took him out of the A meeting right while they're doing CPR so you can
hear and then some fucking jackass goes we got to continue the meeting oh lord
oh stop you know so we're all in the meeting while like a nurse that was in
the meeting was a big meeting maybe 120 people and some doctor or whatever is
outside giving a CPR and we as the long the CPR is going on you know that he's
dead yeah and it was the most horrifying thing and I don't I never went to that
meeting again whoa it was so it's a dead guy just what an asshole for saying
let's continue it's it's honestly I think it's pretty I think that I think what
he did was the right thing what do you mean try to distract out of the
situation no you can't have 100 people 20 people surrounding this okay but take
a break because that's a lot to process even the visual of seeing someone doing
chest compressions on a lifeless body can be traumatic so like take a break
decompress process and we can resume but other than that don't be like yeah
that's not happening just forget about that let's continue talking that's kind
of selfish you have to pay respect well you know what you're gonna say this I
wasn't the guy that said that I know but you're attacking me like I fucking said
that was it you know wasn't me I was so fucking freaked out but in this case it
probably be like back to me guys lights on me I don't know why let him fucking die
no I wouldn't be like that because I'm not a person how you so rude sometimes I'll
tell you what kind of person you are what you're somebody while I'm about to do
chest compressions on somebody plays bejeweled that's fine I've ever that
story that's funny that's funny though that's fine I screamed out somebody
call 911 because we talked about it because he wouldn't know what to do so
he wouldn't help because we wouldn't even call 911 though you fucking idiots he
wouldn't call 911 I'm a bad person no I'm a bad person those your defense in
the last podcast we got a tag team baby we got a tag team ringing sweats come on
where we are where we are time-wise 54 ish yeah that's good that's good
actually 50 60 minute we want an hour jeez pretty good all yep all right so we
have two questions first one pretty good I'm pretty good guys yeah I've got a ton
of things we could pick on but we shall go with how do I come become more of an
alpha male I tried the whole fake it till you make it never really understood
what it is to be alpha I have no problems with public speaking nor do I have
issues with group settings but as soon as it gets out to a one-on-one situation
I never feel like I control the conversation or have any sort of
confidence anything you may have on the subject would be awesome thanks that guy
Matt I think only an alpha male could give advice on how to be an alpha male
yeah I'm not an alpha male he's not I'm not but here come on say the Matt is in
his name yeah is a lot of times you know I mean alpha males don't win okay you
have to be a predator in your own kind of way right so being the quiet guy and
being the guy that so when you're in a situation where there's a lot of hot
chicks or whatever like that just pretend that you don't want anything to do
with it with them you know I mean even make fun of them oh yeah
I mean nagging yeah like shut the fuck up you I mean I wouldn't don't think no
it says that in the book you have the book what's a book oh it's my mystery
right yeah yeah yeah what's the game the game the game yeah that sounds like it's
awful it's outdated but some of the stuff is some of the stuff works because I
hold on one second who's mystery the guy with the peacocks with a bow around his
neck wait is that the pickup artist VH1 had a show on him okay let me tell you
something he's weird though he hit on me in front of Bobby at the comedy store
you serious yeah and Bobby's like who's that guy I was like I don't fucking know
and I was like wait a second I think that's a pickup artist yeah he's not
obviously a pickup okay but he's not an alpha don't use them as an example for
now was on man cow man cow once and he was on it with me oh right so twice I've
run into the guy that side from the point
this guy right here right just do that next question all right the next one
would you guys like to hear the whole email it's a very positive you like some
positivity right now yes we do answer that poor guy's question about how to be
an alpha male though okay yeah he said his thing what would you say you can't
be you can't force that's exactly that's perfect okay like Joe Rogan right he's
an alpha man is an alpha male Chris Dalia is an alpha male I'm not but I still
throughout my life has been I've been able to carve out my section of pussy my
section of pussy what I'm saying is I've been able to like sorry my bad right I
have been able to like clip you I mean side-tang ooh side-tang right and I do
it in my own survival way pussy isn't the only currency that men are driven by I
mean yes well I think it is number one huge part that in my no no but you're
right in the sense that you can't force out you know yourself to be an alpha and
there is a place for all types for alpha beta gamma whatever you are and Bobby
certainly isn't an alpha and I've been in a relationship with an alpha and this
seems to be working much better so it doesn't guarantee you just have to you
know it's all about matching codes with people yeah it's the same way that maybe
two alphas won't get along with each other but a beta and an alpha will it's
just it's about matching codes with people it isn't about thinking you're at
the top of the food chain it's also focusing on something other than that
that you're gonna how are you gonna improve your life in just a general way
you know like you know not everyone wants to be a comic never wants to be an
actor never wants to be a musician whatever but there you have some passion
right something that you want to do focus on that one thing find that one
thing that you want to do and put your life into that and everything else will
come into play I really believe that because when people sense that you have
passion and you have goals and you're driven attractive right it's attractive
regardless if you're an alpha male or not that's the last thing I'm gonna say
about it next question all right so here's the positive email let's absorb
it hi there first off I just want to say a big thank you to the whole Tiger
Belly podcast from the lovely Vancouver British Columbia George Gilbert
Kalyla Bobby you guys have done a tremendous job such a short period of
time so happy I can join Bobby and Gilbert's humor and Kalyla's wisdom and
knowledge every week your own horn section yes I just wanted to say a
special thank you to Kalyla and Bobby Kalyla your true inspiration your battle
with heart conditions that made me appreciate my parents health even more
even though the severity is nowhere close to yours I want to command you for
saying commend you for staying strong Bobby you're truly an entertainer you
brought laughter to me ever since Matt TV showbiz owes you one you are a legend
thank you for also taking care of Kalyla I love you for that hope to see you again
in Vancouver someday and then this question it's a fun one I guess alright
so steering off topic now here is a question for you guys and girls and if
you were a man what would you do a a guy who transforms to a girl has all the
features of a girl except for growing region B a girl who transforms to a guy
has all the features of a guy except for growing region I had mixed answers with
straight guy guy friend so this should be confused me too a guy who get down
what's the first one if you were a man would you do a guy who transforms to a
girl would you do like would you have sex with I don't know okay okay so if I'm
a guy yeah I would I rather have sex with a man with a pussy or a woman with a
dick a woman who looks like a woman but with a dick let's do that yeah that's
I that's how I took that question gender is switched let's do it but I got all of
them whatever very variety of human I can have sex with I want it all you Bobby
I don't even understand the question okay as a man would you rather have sex
with a okay like George yes but has a vagina no or no or me with a dick you
with a dick we thought he was gonna say George look at his face would you
rather have sex with his the texture of his skin would you rather have sex with
Rachel Maddow with a dick or me with a dick no Rachel Maddow with a pussy or me
with a dick every has a pussy yeah Rachel Maddow that's what I'm saying it's
like I fuck Rachel Maddow but I would never fuck George no matter what he has
even if he had a pussy not even I could have nine pussy pink pussy no way so
you would never fuck like a butchie lesbian I would never fuck George anyway
she doesn't even care about the question I'm not gonna fuck George ever ever in
any kind of sexual way in no way he will not tip me over eat my butt I'd rather
fuck him in the ass with his dick as Gilbert than fuck George with a pussy
thank you so much you would rather fuck Gilbert in the ass than fuck George's
pussy yes I think George I think he just doesn't want to have sex with you
anyway I love you he's confused his feelings are hurt he doesn't even know
you're a good dude okay but no that's it guys Bobby shows yes you should have
plugged it off the top babe plug your own mother fucking shows for once he
doesn't know his shows you know that he says Bobby is going to be at Gotham
Comedy Club this weekend in New York whoo Friday and Saturday that's May 6
through the 7th whoo and the weekend after that he's going to be in stand up
stand up live in Phoenix Arizona Phoenix and I think I might be going for
taking a road trip for Phoenix or New York you're not in New York because your
heart right yeah I can't I don't think I'm I should be flying anywhere yet but
yeah yeah because if the plane goes down you're gonna go hey everything's
good it be okay crazy eyes Calila yeah where should they follow us Calila
is your brain okay which no where should they follow us I like cabbage I
like turtles I like turtles so where can they follow us I like turtles if you
haven't already subscribed to our YouTube channel please do we're still
under the name Tiger B but we're changing it to a tiger belly yeah but
I'm George grass him was in a while just search tiger tiger belly podcast I
mean it's the first one that pops up and if you haven't subscribed to on iTunes
yet kindly do and leave us a review find us on Instagram at Tiger Belly on
Twitter at the Tiger Belly and you can write us your questions for the
unhelpful advice section to the Tiger Belly at gmail.com cool and you can
follow Calila at Calamity K on all her social media including snapchats you
want to see some fun stuff my snapchats only of my friends licking their dicks
it's like your pets and like every other three days your friends and then back to
pets yeah and Bobby naked Bobby's one of my pets also if you want to send us some
mail or really quick some of you've been asking about have you guys open the
packages we have so we will put a video of just that separately from the vlogs of
us opening some of the packages and if you'd like to send something I don't have
the address on me or do I let me read it yeah you read it watch I don't show the
yeah you guys want to send us anything our address is one six two six Wilcox
Avenue number what's our number does not have it there one six one okay that's
one six two six Wilcox Avenue number one six one Hollywood California nine
zero zero two eight and please address it to Tiger Belly yeah address it only to
Tiger Belly or to you can address it to I mean I've changed it now but try to
Tiger Belly yeah all streamlined yeah so if you want if it's strictly for Bobby
you can just do Bobby Lee a care of Tiger Belly yeah or if it's something to
Kalyla Kalyla shut up okay don't send her anything don't send her mangoes that
she was waiting for mangoes give me mangoes also follow George Kimmel at
Gilbets Gilbets yes all right guys that's her show thank you guys for listening
and we'll see you next week
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